#i tend to associate ppl a lot with the stuff they talk about

[ironunderstands]

AAAAAAAAA

Genuinely I feel annoying as fuck for saying this but like I can’t stand the way anybody else but me or my mutuals writes Aventio/Ratiorine 90% of the time

So, to vent my frustration, here’s a not in order at all bulleted list of stuff I absolutely despise when seeing content of them. This is not to call ppl out or anything, I just wanna rant about my preferences lol

oh and cw: mentions of slavery, nsfw, suicidal tendencies and non-con

-one or both of them being way to horny/flirty

Maybe this could work in content with an established relationship, but like, these guys don’t fuck, I’m sorry, they don’t. They are the biggest virgin losers ever regardless of if they have had sex in the past or not. Some of yall don’t get that they were acting in Penacony for the most part and Aventurine’s flirtiness didn’t have any weight behind it, he was really just messing with Ratio. I think if he were seriously trying to court Ratio, he’d probably be LESS flirty, but that’s just me. I understand why people make nsfw of them without any kinda buildup because well it’s fun, but for me personally I don’t really like it 90% of the time, however I fully get this is a me thing. I can tolerate it more in fanart bc well it’s fanart so yeah there’s not gonna be 3000k words of lore behind it, but like if I’m reading a fic and Aventio go from not even being in a relationship to having sex on a whim it just confuses me.

-yandere anything

I despise this trope already but it makes me 100000x more annoyed because holy shit neither of them would be a yandere I get it some people like this but WHYY THEMMM it doesn’t make sense. Yandere Aventurine makes me even more mad bc why the fuck would he make someone suffer like he did when he was younger???

-emotionless Ratio

Idk why half the community treats Ratio like he’s an unfeeling logic robot who’s sole goal is knowledge even when the game beats you over the head about how he’s the exact fucking opposite of that, but honestly I think this is just a symptom of the fact that a lot of ratiorine writers don’t give two fucks about him at all and he’s practically written as a plot device for Aventurine’s characterization.

-misunderstanding why Ratio is a tsundere

I’ve seen a lot of people misinterpret how and why Ratio is a tsundere towards Aventurine, citing it as if he doesn’t want to be associated with him/looks down upon him/is ashamed to like him when that’s really not true at all. Ratio respects and cares about Aventurine a hell of a lot, and he isn’t shy at all to show it when it’s necessary (see DSAIWYTBOL or the “if you can’t hold on any longer then tell me”). However, the reason he pushes away Aventurine isn’t exactly personal (although Aventurine’s closeness to him is part of the reason why).

Rather, Ratio tends to downplay his close relationships a lot, likely as a defense mechanism, as he admits himself that he isn’t good with people in one of the dialogue options with trailblazer for the express visits. Now why he is this way is a subject of speculation because Ratio rarely ever talks about himself, and the only character who actually has a voiceline on him is Aventurine himself, so it’s very hard to get an outside perspective on him. His character stories don’t really help that much either, as they are more about his personal philosophy and journey in life rather than his personality.

However, taking what Ratio says towards Aventurine at face value when he has proven the opposite (especially considering how the trope of the tsundere is kinda centered on the character in question spouting bullshit) results in people completely misunderstanding their relationship which can get REALLY annoying. Ratio doesn’t think Aventurine is an idiot in the slightest, he just worries about how his methods put himself in danger, not his capabilities.

-fast burn

You’re telling me these emotionally constipated idiots will get together easily? No. There’s a reason I write the most crazy bullshit happening to them before a confession scene and that’s because that’s the only way you can get them to confront their goddamn feelings quickly.

-slavery aus/anything like this

Self explanatory. If you have fetishized Aventurine’s past or made stuff like this please stay 1000 feet away from me at all times or block me. Thank you 🙏

-babying Aventurine

He’s one of the most competent members of the cast, but somehow people act like his breakdown scene in 2.1 is how he behaves 24/7 when that isn’t true at all. Aventurine is incredibly smart, and single-handedly clawed his way to the top. He does not need Ratio to save him. Would he appreciate Ratio’s support? Of course, and he definitely needs loving relationships in his life, but Aventurine isn’t a damsel in distress and not everything in his life is miserable and related to his trauma.

-or the horrible reverse of babying Aventurine: his trauma doesn’t exist actually and he’s perfectly fine/ they write him like it never happened

This one is rather rare and it has overlap with a few of the other points (seriously I’m gonna tweak out the next time someone writes the character who is implied to have survived sex trafficking being a person who would even dream of crossing others boundaries). Usually this happens because people treat Aventurine’s playboy mask as if it’s his actual personality and not traits he picked up to survive and succeed at his goals, and while admittedly even Aventurine is losing track of where the mask ends and he begins, some of y’all take it wayy to far even going on to unironically call him a fuckboy when he’s anything but that. The thing is, I think this happens when people erase who Kakavasha is from their minds, and act as if that side of Aventurine is a purely innocent child and all the “bad” parts of him are part of Aventurine’s mask. However, that’s not true, and Aventurine’s most admirable traits ARE Kakavasha’s. His strategicness, his intellegence, his bravery, these are all traits he possessed long before becoming Aventurine of stratagems, something which he demonstrated when he for example got his sisters neckless back, or made that bet with his first enslaver.

Aventurine’s purity and Aventurine’s capabilities are not separated between Kakavasha and Aventurine of Stratagems, both of those qualities ARE Kakavasha’s so if you are going to write him with the mask off, you have to write BOTH, not give into one or the other.

The things I tend to drop when writing him with the mask off are his false compliments and niceties, acting like he really gives a shit about the IPC’s goals, turning down the flamboyance and cockiness to reasonable levels and making him seem less like he’s playing pretend. Honestly I don’t think it’s that hard yet this is still a pitfall I see a lot of people stumbling into.

-Ratio talking like a goddamn encyclopedia

I understand he’s like that sometimes, but he also is well versed in internet lingo and seriously nobody unironically talks like that 24/7 because it’s pointless, and Ratio doesn’t use big words to seem smart, he uses them when they are necessary.

Like I’m sorry but if they are in a middle of having sex and unprompted Ratio starts talking like a biology textbook I’m closing the fic and running around my room screaming BECAUSE GOD IS IT CRINGE. Promoted it can be funny because yeah I can see him doing that but oh my god HE WOULD NOT SAY THAT I don’t even want to give an example it pisses me off that bad but trust me it’s a common phenomenon AND I HATE IT

-Aventurine trying to kill himself 24/7

He isn’t an active suicide risk every goddamn day of his life, he’s just self destructive and those are TWO DIFFERENT THINGS.

Yes, he tested if you could die in the dreamscape several times, but that’s because one of the favorable outcomes for his mission WOULD BE DYING in the dreamscape. He’s not doing this during a normal work week and even if I believe he still has suicidal tendencies, he’s not gonna throw his life away randomly or over nothing

-Ratio holds authority over Aventurine in any capacity

No, just no. Like the only other thing he might have over him is being intelligent, although they both are smart at different things so even then does it matter? Like I’m sorry but normal human with the ability to float and make imaginary constructs versus LITERAL FUCKING STONEHEART is not a fair fight on Ratio’s end. It doesn’t matter that he’s physically larger than Aventurine, muscles don’t mean shit in a sci-fi setting, especially when your opponent can just summon 3 bajillion coins to drop into your head at a whim and there’s nothing you can do about it. Not like Aventurine would ever dream of hurting him, of course, but seriously people need to stop acting like their different in stature really means anything. Even in terms of position, Aventurine probably outranks him so this false sense of authority people apply to Ratio in their relationship is confusing at best.

Hmm, well that’s all the things I remember to bitch about although I probably have more complaints. To be fair, whenever they aren’t written like incredibly smart people who are idiots hopelessly in love with one another when together I pop a blood vessel so most of these (besides THAT one) are non issues and if you have made/enjoyed these don’t feel ashamed because of my opinions. I needed to let out my inner grinch every once and awhile, so thanks for reading

[entropy-sea-system]

OK OK impromptu rant but I need to get this out there as I still feel somewhat connected to the aro community-

I have been watching the tags, I've been talking the people in my local a-spec community and I think it amazes me just how incredible the relationships put forth by aro and aces are, while the communities just don't reflect any of it.

I've stopped identifying with the aroallo label because there was no sense of community associated with it. The a-spec spaces are made for aces only and the ace stuff in them is abhorrent. I am tired of people passing it off as repulsion, while still seeing people saying "hookers" are disgusting in a-spec tags. I'm tired of people saying PDA is bad. I'm tired of people acting like aros and aces can only be clueless cinnamon rolls. I'm tired of people being so so so stuck in their own perspective of the world they act like people in romantic relationships can't be happy. So on and so forth.

The concepts we have are passionating. They're the coolest ones I've been exposed to in queer communities. However, nobody thinks about them. Nobody speak about them. All we have is endless messages about how the world is so so confusing or hatred directed at sex and romance. I get that but I wish we went even a tiny bit past that really. It's a community filled with adults that feels so immature and I honestly think there is some sort of self infantilization going on. I don't like that I don't have symbols that aren't associated with uwu smol bean dragon lover stuff. It makes me sick and is why I don't identify with it anymore but it's genuinely sad to see because technically that's still the people who will relate to me the most.

It feels like people are always desperate to understand how the norm works and how they can best align with it instead of fully experiencing their identity. And that's an understandable thing to do but the community is just that with sex and romance negativity sprinkled on top of it.

I wish they were angrier. I wish they were more introspective. I wish they thought about breaking the norms more instead of headcannoning every female character without a love interest as aroace and talking about how gross sex is. I wish I felt like I can connect with the people who are supposed to be at least partly like me.

Anyway you're cool and I hope you're doing well! Sorry to drop all of this onto you but yeah I trust you with my ranty feels about the community.

We didn't really expect this ask but thank you for sending it!!

There are a lot of issues with the aspec community, especially online, (we have no experience with irl ones yet). And what you described here explains the issues with it quite well.

I feel like most of the aspec community ends up catering to mainly aces, and to a lesser extent aros, and slightly to apls, while other atertiary is hardly discussed (and agender ppl often just lump w gender stuff instead even though its aspec). I think the community is also rather divided, personally.

We're in some discord servers w mostly other apls and aros/run by other apl aros (often also romo aro) and they tend to overall be normal about aspec identities without being negative about attractions or actions or gatekeeping aspec labels. Currently we logged off discord a bit but we have in the past been in aro spaces that had many of the issues you mention , and still come across people being that way on tumblr.

I think there is a problem where some aros think that calling romance inherently toxic is somehow "activism" and deny that romance negativity exists, then claim that they "don't have to consider every culture ever" when people state that some cultures are romance negative and do harm people for engaging in romance.

They seem to think its "punching up" and some alloaros in particular try to justify it by acting like the united states is the only country that matters and citing sex negativity as a reason for romance negativity "not existing". When aces do this about sex its harmful, but thats not supposed to be a reason to deny that being romance negative is toxic and harmful to others even if their country doesn't persecute people for engaging in romance.

I also personally see a some aros hesitant to id with ace or acespec terms that technically fit them because of how bad the ace community has been about sex and anyone who isn't ace, as well as aces and aros generally forgetting about atertiary ppl. Some of them prefer terms like lightspec or such or allospec partly because of that.

It's understandable that some people feel a disconnect from labels like aro and ace as a result of how the communities tend to be tbh. I've had moments when I didn't want to id as aro because of this, and I consider myself both aro and alloro due to my arospec orientation.

Also being tertiary repulsed and being repulsed by sex repulsion (it just happens to repulse me a lot to read about even if not stated in a sex negative way), makes it a bit hard to be around other aspecs. I feel really disgusted and triggered when other aros talk about squishes and qprs and friendships, even if I think they should be able to talk about that. Which makes it hard to be around some other aros.

I also get what you mean about people trying to align with the existing norm. I'm seeing a rise in people maligning labels they don't understand and this attitude of "the only kind of weird thats fine is the kind of weird I am", which the aspec community has certainly not been immune to either.

I feel like for some reason most aspecs I see online, especially aros, are minors? Maybe because the aromantic label only really caught on after 2005 iirc so older people less likely to have heard of it? Im not a huge fan of how aspec tends to be infantilised either. I find issues with how some of the aro symbols are very derivative of ace symbols because we are not some extension of ace we're our own community. I can also see how ppl may find it too infantilising to have symbols like frogs and griffons etc.

Also yeah what is with people doing that about characters who are women or girls and express that they don't want to get married??? Or even just don't have a love interest. I understand if aroaces want more headcanoned rep or non-aspecs I guess idk want to fill some headcanon diversity quota without actually supporting aspecs but.

Not wanting marriage or not having a love interest is not inherently equal to not wanting romance and/or sex. I feel especially that people like to assume not wanting to have children means not wanting sex (which I find pretty reductive in that its acting like thats the only reason ppl have sex, especially as a sex favorable person who doesn't want kids). And all aspecs deserve more canon rep to begin with. I think I have a gripe with ppls aspec headcanons almost always being alloace or aroace. It's like they forget other aspecs like apls, alloaros, neu aros, non sam aros, atertiary, etc. even exist!

Additionally I think its partly because romance is emphasized more for female characters that even fans decide to make their interpretations about romance/a lack there of as if its the character's only personality trait. In my opinion its just as obsessive about romance if someone thinks all there is to a character is not engaging in it. I also see people act like they're solely worried a woman/girl character is going to fall for a man/boy character they hc as aro but not often the opposite like. Just say you see romance as gendered/feminine in some way and go I guess lol.

I also feel like mainly allistic non-aspecs do this but when ppl hc an autistic character as ace or aroace it feels infantilising if theres literally no other rationale behind their headcanon. I feel desexualised at times as an autistic and thats mostly bc ppl pick up on some kind of nd thing and they assumed I'm too "innocent" to like romance or sex, or because they view us as "unable to consent"(which can be true of some people if their neurodivergence affects their ability to consent to things even as an adult, but isn't universally true.) . I think some of this perception is also rooted in eugenics (due to people equating sex with having kids and viewing disability and/or neurodivergence as a tragedy and thinking its 'bad' for disabled and/or nd ppl to have kids).

So I don't really appreciate implications that someone is ace just by virtue of being autistic. I think its also unfair to autistic aros and aces because our neurodivergence can influence our orientation, but being autistic does not mean that makes someone inherently ace and/or aro.

My physical disability is relatively mild and less talked about (chronic pain and fatigue), and I don't reveal it to most ppl(ppl who dont live with me won't know I get exhausted from non-taxing to abled ppl activities, and chronic pain is not visible at all and we can't get mobility aids due to not being independent yet) so Im not fully aware how people view my apl and aro identities in that regard.

And there is definitely an issue with aspecs trying to enforce NEW norms. They cry about how people are forced into performing romance and sex to fit in but then turn around and tell people they need to love or have friends or family or pets in order to be a good person. It's also very harmful to aspecs bc some of us are loveless or atertiary etc. in ways that aros and aces apparently hate lol. A lot of aros in particular are very platonormative.

The aro community is also rather hostile to romo aros. There are still people who exclude romo aros from the aro label or act like we have to bend over backwards and acknowledge that we are "amatonormative oppressors" for liking romance or feeling some connection to it.

I think also the meme about putting a box away on a tall shelf away from a child is relevant here. The word amatonormative is constantly misused by a lot of aros. I've seen aros call alloromantic apls "amatonormative" and act like "amatonormative" means 'person who engages in romance'.

Its not a term abt engaging in romance or liking it. It's also not an excuse to pressure people to have or like friends either. I think aros should have actual discussions about amatonormativity that aren't just US-centric and about romance(wow do aros love to ignore that monogamy, non-queer, cis, etc. are social categories deemed more valuable under amatonormative societal norms), instead of using it to describe anyone they deem as interested in romance .

On that note, a lot of them use some examples of toxic relationships as reasons to call romance toxic and almost advocate for romance to never exist(which is especially disgusting to see for me, as in my country a lot romance negative conservative rhetoric is literally worded the same way). These people almost never acknowledge that other relationships like friendship can be toxic too.

I think some of these people believe in 'morality of repugnance' in that they think if its something they personally find repulsive in some way, that means its inherently immoral, which is not conducive to having unbiased views of the world, or critical thinking. I think a lot of ppl my age and younger are especially trying to do this because Ive lost count of how many I've seen be like "ewww thats gross/weird and so its wrong/immoral", and literally spouting conservative rhetoric while thinking they're politically liberal/leftists, perhaps with different wording but yeah. (I think that one tumblr post abt ppl in that age range being 'conservative on accident', especially in the united states- though that is concerning given the way ppl from other countries tend to absorb american opinions and such too much, describes this phenomenon)

I think some aros are also still so caught up in how much of a tragedy they think their aromanticism is, and I feel bad for them but thats not all there is to being aro and its a bit weird when ppl act like it is.

I think one of the best things about being aspec for me is feeling more like I can engage in and not engage in relationships (Im only favorable to sexual partnerships w no label other than 'sexual partner', and romance only w two partners as of now, and completely averse to all tertiary/nonrose. before I fully realised my aspec identities i pressured myself to have friends and felt like I'd be obligated to be favorable to nonsexual romance if someone wanted that with me, to 'be an ally to aces', even though it repulsed me. I also felt obligated to want qprs especially after realising Im aro. Realising Im atertiary helped me stop forcing myself to want nonrose relationships.)

Anyways that was a lot of rambling but probably most of my opinions on the aro and some extent aspec community.

[quendiviner]

Hiiiiii sorry if I missed it but is there toby and frank beef? And could you elaborate on it 👀 much love to you and your ocs I adore Toby a whole lot 💗💗

AAAAAA THANK U SM and also thank u for asking heheheh also sorry this got a bit long. um. tw for poor mental health and suicide attempt mention in the latter part of the post 😬

Things between Tobias & Frank are v funny and complicated bc. well. They've known each other since they were like, well, 7? Figure skating rivals lmao 😭 They both loved to annoy the fuck out of each other but also tended to talk about many different things since both of them had parents that were Really Invested in their futures, meaning they tended to make them concentrate on the sport (+ school in Toby's case, Claudia (its mom) had planned out a med school backup plan for it in case something went wrong) and thus meaning that they had very little time and actually any peers to talk to.

Toby had hated figure skating ever since it started being into it and like, complained a lot about it to Frank. So Frank got an idea on how to end its career. They were skating as a pair during this one contest when they were 15, and at some point Frank kinda dropped (everyone thinks it's an accident) Toby down, thinking it would get like some kind of light injury or something that would heal fast and instead Tobias got its knee fractured. Chronic knee pain has entered the chat or whatever.

Toby was already on its second year of university at that point so it just switched to full time studying, though keeping some kind of contact with Frank. Frank instead got better and better at skating and ended up competing in serious international contests and stuff like that. I think the moment they actually stopped talking to each other was when Tobias left its family at 17 and moved to the other side of the country to work in a corporate lab (it got this fun idea and presented it on thesis fair -> some corporate headhunter spotted it and offered it a spot in their corporate x elite university accelerated phd program. Toby's mom didn't agree bc she wanted it to go straight to med school and they ended up arguing and Tobias just left (tm) and accepted offer).

ANYWAY! Fast forward several years later (they're both 22). Aleena (Toby's university friend) invited Tobias to cofound a skincare start up based on their cosmetic chemistry class project and Tobias agrees, thinking it's a great way to put everything that happened in the corpo lab behind (including but not only limited to Toby's fiance killed by either said corporates or the guy who asked them to give the project data to him for a 'media coverage'). Now you may be thinking how does Frank fit in? WELL.

At the same time, Frank is a famous figure skater and is (funnily enough) also making a breakthrough in acting. A famous young face might as well be the thing they needed for ads. So, Tobias ends up contacting him and asking if he'd like to be their celebrity ambassador or whatever. Frank agreed.

Said situation means that Frank also shows up in the office every now and then to talk "business", especially since he lives in the same city at this point (they're in Florida). One time he shows up and notices Toby being all stressed and stuff like that. Which is honestly the least of Toby's problems at that point (it was in a bad spot. really, really bad spot. it also doesn't remember like 80% of whatever was happening during all this start up thing). Frank asks if he could help in any way and in the end they end up, well, doing not safe for work things in Toby's office.

And so their weird situationship began. No they're not dating yes they are having sex every now and then (very often actually), Toby called it "associates with benefits later". Obviously they had to try hard not to show any signs of it in public bc neither of them wanted ppl to know that they're seeing each other like that.

Did it help with Toby's stress? Well. It did feel maybe a bit better at the beginning but started feeling even worse day by day, and adding up everything else (like substance use, declining feel of self worth and work stress) it really made things to its brain. They also bickered and argued, like, A Lot, which is honestly what they've been doing all the time they've known each other, but this was now affecting Toby's wellbeing very negatively. Frank was also quite secretive about his private life, maybe a bit too much for Toby's liking, which made it feel like he's hiding something.

And, well, turned out Toby's suspicions were correct. One morning, waking up in Frank's bed, it heard some kind of conversation from the living room. Apparently, this whole time, Frank had a boyfriend who knew nothing about their weird relationship and whom Tobias never knew about bc Frank didn't tell it anything. haha. It waited until said boyfriend left and walked out of the bedroom with this weird empty face and went "Oh so when were you going to tell me you have another person? Man I can't believe you used to me to cheat on someone" or something like that and just, well, left the apartment. Something clicked in its brain and made it feel so awful that it just, well, considered going home and eating a whole bottle of pills. Only thing that stopped it was coming home and realizing it doesn't have any left. It went to sit outside on the stairs of its terrace, to cry a little and wonder if it was worth it to go to the pharmacy. Some stray cat appeared from the bushes and went to cuddle next to it, making it feel much better and forget the idea it had, instead coming up with a new one. So it went back inside, packed its important things into two suitcases and a backpack, quickly sold its shares for super cheap to Aleena and just left, moving again to the other side of the country and wanting to forget the whole thing. To start a new page or something like that.

Frank and Tobias barely had any contact after that, not counting one moment when Toby was doing its chemistry master's degree and Frank showed up in the city. The whole thing ended with Klara punching Frank in his face. ANYWAY. They meet again when they are in early 40's bc guess who Toby's boss's boyfriend is? Frank. They had a brief conversation and then probably never talked to each other ever again haha.

[yourlocaldisneyvillain]

I know this is a really stupid question, but why is the Jan stevens kink (I don’t know what it’s called sry) kinda upsetting for some people? Like, toxic or whatever. I totally respect it, it’s just not clicking in my head if that makes sense? I’m just not totally clear on what’s wrong with it. I haven’t thought about it much though, so maybe that’s on me. I just thought maybe you could enlighten me, ‘cause now I’m curious. Thx 💟

hi!! ofc, happy to explain it!

the way i wrote it, it's really not extreme -- and that's the level of that kink (i generally referred to it as alvinolagnia -- a belly/midriff partialism -- will include some info at the end of this post) that i was personally comfortable with writing. there is nothing wrong with that kink per se -- however! if we are talking specifically about feederism there is a lot of..... let's say... disturbing stuff associated with it. in certain spaces (online and irl) a lot of feeders are men who enjoy forcing their female partners to eat absurd amounts of food and gain an absurd amount of weight -- so much so that they need to rely on their partner to do things for them. it also involves those men calling those women pretty nasty slurs, and a popular one is to call your partner a pig. a lot of fatphobia combined with misogyny in that community, but also glorification of obesity (we are talking about people who gain so much weight they can barely walk by themselves anymore). it's..... a lot.

HOWEVER. you could argue that most kinks have their extreme sides. in the bdsm community, for example, you could have a light dom/sub dynamic in the bedroom, or you could be someone's full time slave, have your partner control every aspect of your life, including your finances etc. so basically, another person practically owns you. that's also real icky haha. but then again, we all like to read a nice smutty fic with light dom/sub dynamics, right? and i think there's no harm in that.

what rubs people the wrong way about this kink is that it can get real disturbing and extreme real fast -- and a lot of people who are into it ARE on the extreme side. however, there are definitely people who just enjoy some harmless belly kink stuff, but i feel like they are not as loud as the disturbing part of that crowd haha, so people don't tend to pay attention to them. for them, belly kink + feederism is immediately something very extreme.

i think a lot of the ick people feel for that particular kink is because of deep fatphobia that runs in our society. people would literally rather drink piss than feel bloated for one (1) hour haha. bc when you look at it, how is that ickier than like... feet? or piss? or even breeding, which is a very popular kink online lol (also with that one you could find heaps of Problematique(TM) stuff, such as forced pregnancy stuff etc.). or like plain old choking. how is choking less disturbing that like... being bloated and getting off on it lol. so that's for sure something to think about.

so basically, the overall take would be -- every kink can range from fun, mild, and harmless to very disturbing/borderline abuse -- some kinks can skew into the icky territory much faster than others though, so that is also something to keep in mind.

so, there -- those were yourlocaldisneyvillain's hot takes for today. enjoy kink!week :))) see you tomorrow :*

(that being said -- ppl are allowed to dislike or be grossed out by any kink for any reason. there doesn't have to be anything deeper to it) some info about alvinolagnia/ belly stuffing/feederism that i already included in the jan fic is under the cut!

Alvinolagnia is another term for a belly fetish. Alvinolagnia is a partialism in which an individual is sexually attracted to the midriff or belly. The belly is widely considered as an erogenous region, meaning it holds multiple nerve endings that make it sensitive to various sensations. Therefore, having a belly fetish usually coincides with belly-related sexual acts including but not limited to touching/rubbing the belly region, using sex toys and other objects to stimulate the belly region, rubbing one's belly against a partner's belly, or licking or sucking the navel.

A kink that closely relates to the belly fetish is belly stuffing — which is when people get a psychological thrill and sexual pleasure from the idea of eating a lot — doing it themselves, or witnessing someone else do it.

Belly stuffing can be related to feederism. Feederism is a fat fetish subculture in which individuals eroticise weight gain and feeding. Feeders are individuals who are sexually aroused by feeding their partners and encouraging them to gain weight. Feederism encompasses people being turned on by feeding, belly stuffing, weight gain, fat, and often, dominance and submission.

[gayleviticus]

I feel like even when we think of punishment as corrective it's in a very behaviourist way like pavlovian conditioning. if people do a bad thing you give them a slap and that conditions them to associate being naughty with negative stimuli

but I feel like pretty much all the time everyone uses a form of corrective 'punishment' (or rather, consequences) simply by setting boundaries. when someone is rude and you stop talking to them, that communicates that you take it seriously. there's not necessarily a one size fits all response either - if the rudeness thrives on attention, ignoring it can work, but often it can just embolden it.

but I guess like. we tend to jump to thinking that setting boundaries and communicating certain behaviour isn't OK means punishment. but there very much is a big category of more neutral, natural consequences; not trying to punish people into being good, but as a form of communication that puts your money where your mouth is.

even if you just think of stuff like, say, mask rules. punishing not wearing a mask with fines doesn't necessarily convince anti maskers to comply, but it communicates to the general public that it's a rule worth taking seriously. there are a lot of rules and regulations in society that honestly, people don't follow; if the government or institutions or whatever don't follow through on these expectations, the message becomes that this is just another one of those ideas on paper nobody actually cares about.

(which can also be frustrating for autistic ppl esp, who tend to go by the rule book and be less aware of the fact there's often an unwritten rulebook of rules people actually bother following)

[insufferable-talkstuck]

(HELPP sorry bro gonna ask this blog instead mb 💀😭)

helloo can u classpect me pls (idk heo to do this 🔥) including a little bit of vent for the sake of classpects

basically i am reclusive, secretive, spacey, knowledgeable but not in an arrogant way, creative, pretty absent minded, and very awkward :]

my main interests include TMNT, MBTI, experimental music, psychology, and marine life. (probably says nothing)

i also like drawing but sometimes i get mad jealous over other ppls art

i also have a strong interest in leftism, anti-racism and anti-capitalism. idk what that says tho

i can get RLY obsessive about my interests and i will NOT shut up about whatever im hyperfixating on

i find it extremely difficult to grasp social cues, in other words i am socially inept

i can have a lot of trouble with empathy usually, not saying i have no empathy tho

no social life. 0. not even one (1) friend. offline or online.

if i had a social group tho i think id be the weird one who is very awkward and does not get jokes 😭

i like to consider both logic and emotions when making a decision, but i tend to value logic and rationality more sometimes

i have a tendency to stay up really late, like really late (it is 5 am as i am writing this

(idk of the text below counts as a vent or not but read idk)

ive always been really bad at explaining, wording, or identifying my own emotions, idk why but its just really hard to come up with words that can accurately describe how i feel, which is why im shit at venting

nvm i think im just bad at wording my own thoughts in general, it makes me feel kind of dumb, im just as bad at that on text too 😭😭 communicating is hell

(vent-ish thing is over)

supernatural stuff is pretty cool too idk

ive been told im dry and very monotonous in person 💀 like a robot n shit

i also dont like being wrong but not in an arrogant know-it-all asshole kinda way ❤

idk what else to put here.

Seer of Void

I'm not picking up any sign that you would *want* to be assigned a void player but I don't tell people what they want to hear.

- dissection -

‘ basically — :] ’ in this paragraph you list off some traits that could easily be associated with void

‘ i can RLY — tho ’ classpects aren't political stances and tho some classes and aspects are described as more devoted or revolutionary it doesn't specifically tilt it towards any view on these things. go girl give us nothing

‘ i find it — jokes ’ you're listing traits of autism, not something that could help me classpect you. However in all technicality "lacking" so many things can be written off as void

‘ i like to consider — on text too ’ okay, Dirk strider moment I guess, if you had only left this paragraph i would have given you prince of heart and left it at that

- dissection over -

why I think you're a seer of void

seers struggle to grasp their aspect at first, how it works and how they could relate to it escapes them, but once they learn it they're comfortable in it. you talk like youre rampaging to find fragments of a personality, sloppily putting paragraphs about yourself together, but if you were to take a step back and relax I think you'd be relieved and find comfort in the nothingness, and along with it the unlimited potential you'll master but.. baby steps

bonus round

i think there would be a destructive heart player and/or a mind player in your session, you seem torn between the two, I don't see this talked about amongst the classpecting population but I do think the aspects of the players in your session would affect you. with all my evidence of that coming from the kids and trolls sessions I mean the bond is just so clear

[violentviolette]

Hey, very uncertain question here.

I was diagnosed with CD and ADHD at 11, and about two years later I was taken out of therapy for monetary reasons. I haven't been actually diagnosed with ASPD, but uh. It's fairly obvious.

Have you ever experienced just having attachment fall off when you stop spending time with your loved ones? As in, you care about them and enjoy spending time with them, think of them often, and then you leave them and they just disappear from your mind? It happens in just a day or two, and you don't stop caring about them when you call them, but unless you're talking to them, it's like they're not a real person. Out of sight, out of mind, I guess.

I experience this with every person in my life, and i was wondering if you had experience or insights.

Thanks very much!

yea, thats a Super common thing for nuerodivergency in general and adhd especially and for people with both adhd and autism its almost a universal experience

it's not associated with aspd at all because it's root cause has nothing to do with aspd, but a lot of people with aspd also have other neurodivergencies and thus experience this

the cause of that is just focus. for ppl with adhd their brains tend to tunnel vision and hyper focus on what is immediately stimulating to them in that moment, and push everything else to the back. adhd brains have difficulty taking in, processing, and organizing stimuli. they take in to much, cant processes it all and become overwhelmed, and then fail to organize it into usable information so things that are not directly taking up ur attention in that moment often get pushed to the back in order to be able to focus on whats in front of u. this to outside observers often looks like the person doesnt care, but thats not the case at all. it's just ur brain trying to function by putting things that are not immediately demanding ur attention to the side so it can work on processing whats in front of u this manifests in many ways for adhd brains. things like clutter blindness also fall under this category and are part of what contributes to adhd "doom piles" where u put down a collection of stuff and then forget it exists there and it sits in ur hallway for 2years and despite walking past it 3 times a day u still have never moved or cleaned it because ur brain has hidden it in the "not relevant right now" corner so its definitly a super common thing for adhd, but not something thats linked to aspd at all

[untilteddocument]

[Image description: A set of Tumblr tags. They read:

"#I think the current design of social media has a lot to do with it personally #the fact of the matter is that more extremely derivative content that confronts fewer challenging themes circulates easier #and a lot of creators are trying to make a buck so if thats the only stuff that gets decent exposure then its the obvious choice #also potentially poorly designed and poorly funded educational systems also factor in bc literary analysis IS a learned skill #and if you're just chasing whatever triggers a strong gut emotional reaction w/o investigating why then once again #romance is an easy grab #this i think also explains the 'fandom ghosts' / 'ship molds' of characters being cast as the same pairing #even against their canon characterization and narrative arcs and thematic associations #you get drawn to a certain dynamic you feel strongly when you see it you want to see it again and you havent analyzed the source so #you dont notice the disparities you just focus on the emotional high of enjoying some romance. you share it. #people who dont know the source can understand it easily and like it too so it gets further reach. so on and so on #boy im talkative in the tags today lol anyways thats just my vague theory i am not a sociologist #and i hope i dont sound like im casting ppl deep in fandom as inherently stupid what i mean to convey is that its a system #supported by the structure of the platform its on to draw you in with easy dopamine which everyone wants anyways #and a lot of people just werent given the chance to pick up the tools for understanding what could be wrong with this #that said if youre stubbornly resisting learning to apply a critical literary lens to anything thats on you lol. grow up #long post"

End description]

--------------------------

Adding my own thoughts here.

So, this is an old post, obviously, but it gave voice to something I hadn't and still haven't been able to stop thinking about.

I think the above bunch of tags has the right of most of it, but I recently saw a post screenshot from @gallusrostromegalus where they note that a lot of fandom is for works that are a specific mix of fun to watch/read and incomplete/loose enough (I'm hesitant to use "bad" as the qualifier because while it's broadly true, it's not all that exact) that people see spaces they can colonize, so to speak, and it got me thinking. Maybe in addition to cheap dopamine and the problems with education systems, that theory kind of contributes, in that engaging with stuff like the MCU or Naruto gives fans one specific approach which doesn't work with something like Squid Game but it's the only tool they have any familiarity with.

Now, I do want to emphasize that I'm not saying there's no room for contextless shipfics and AUs. I'd be a fucking hypocrite if I stood up at the devil's sacrament and denounced shipfics as some sign of the Fall of Rome or whatever given the fan content I tend to consume. It's...

...hm.

I guess the way I'd put it is that art is, at core, an attempt at conversation between the artist and the audience, but while this does mean that the audience has agency, it also means that both sides have to be at least having the same conversation.

Does this mean that the audience has no room for its own input? No, 'course not. That's what Death of the Author means. It means what the author meant to say isn't as important as what they said.

It also means, however, that if a work, for example, says "power doesn't corrupt; power isolates, and isolation corrupts" and the only thing the audience has to say back is that they want the gangly white men to fuck nasty, then there's not much of a conversation happening.

also everyone treating squid game like the latest fandom of the week and making aus and trendy videos and shipping and all that is absolutely missing the point. beyond salvation

[iloveutoodeath]

🪼

lmao so i heard back from hot topic and they did not want to hire me which i have some mixed feelings about, the most prominent ones being 1. relief because during the interview (and after when i was reflecting on it) i kept getting the feeling that a management position there would probably suck sooo bad because it would just be my current job 2.0 but WORSE (similar expectations, similar slow af pace since it’s in the same dead mall i currently work at-> potentially similar shitty hours because payroll depends on sales + the pay was sooooo much lower than wht i’m currently making at my job as a REGULAR sales associate!!) and 2. curious as hell who it was that they chose over me!!!! i still think it was weird as hell that they did a group interview for a management position because it only allowed for very general questions to be asked and the interview felt very rushed. i think i did okay, but tbh i don’t do very well in group interview settings because the feeling of competition is a lot more obvious and i tend to either shrink back or overcompensate when i feel like i’m not doing as well as others which makes me look like i’m all over the place -___- there were two younger ppl there i felt were really underqualified, so they’re out of the question, but two others did REALLY well imo and i wouldn’t be surprised if one of them was chosen. i just want to know whooooo lmao (i hope it was the recently divorced lady who also works at del taco and had red hair, i liked her and she seemed really friendly and tbh i feel like she really needed the opportunity. if they chose the other guy i guess that’s fair but if i lost to one of them i hope it was to the lady lmao)

anyways i have my interview at michael’s tomorrow, which i really really hope goes well because the pay there is good and i feel like that would be a really great place to work compared to like.. mall-retail. from the start i was like if i had to choose between hot topic and michaels i’d definitely go for michaels, so i’m not too bummed about the rejection, in fact i feel like i dodged a bullet with hot topic idk i just have a feeling it would have majorly sucked 😂 …but i definitely feel more nervous about the interview tomorrow because now the stakes feel a lot higher, it’s basically do or die bc i reaaaaalllyyy need a new job and if this doesn’t go well then i gotta go back to the applying process :-// anyways i know it’s very lame and boring for me to talk about this stuff over and over but well whatever ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ as franz kafka once said fuck my stupid baka life

[multi-lefaiye]

💌

YEAHHHHH ADRIAN MY GUY

cats // also birds // the concept of cats and birds combined into one beast // all of your ocs but especially akiho and jenais // skyrim and the elder scrolls in general // naruto // also jojo // dagoth ur and vivec (making them share a spot) // in terms of color vibes i associate you with like a cooler purple // behbeh <333 iconic kitty cat <33 // ok i also kinda associate you with the og design for my oc mihael b/c i remember you drew him once and that was the first time someone had drawn fanart of any of my ocs and i was so blown away

[alienssstufff]

Just saw a tag on one of your posts ("#*shaking* fucking ask me about their classpects - ask me about their classpects i fucking dare") and I for one would absolutely love to hear about the classpects you've been coming up with!! :)

WHWHHW and im GLAD YOU ASKED >:]]

ty anon for taking one for the team - i've been rehearsing this very moment uvu

TLDR Bdubs is a  KNIGHT OF TIME and Etho a MAGE OF BREATH

I tend to ramble so explanations will be UNDER THE CUT

I wrote a lot of this beforehand in notes and to ppl on priv but to preface I use @//dahniwitchoflight ‘s posts when classpecting - good read recommend checking them out if you’re interested!

[ BDUBS : Knight of Space ] Ok so I like firstly rly wanted Bdubs to be a Time player (obvious clock reasons) but truthfully Space is rly HIS aspect as it is often associated with ‘the bigger picture’, objects and creativity -- art.

“Bdubs isn’t a builder, he’s an artist.” - Scar talking about Bdubs’ and his builds and he was sooo right for that. Not just by his builds either but like,,, dude have you SEEN when he draws? When he paints??? Inspirational one of my favourite environmental artists period. This summary by Dahni I think explains him quite well:

“This makes it so Space is grand and can look at things at a higher perspective than others. It is run much more by a strong sense of intuition, and inner knowing of how things are meant to be, without being able to express the specifics in clear detail. They paint things with broad strokes and without clear lines between differences. Considering each difference to actually be a subtle variation of the same thing. Space is also very grounded in the present, very focused on the here and now, and can seem very unconcerned with the future consequences of any decisions they may or may not make. Instead relying on their inner understanding that things are happening the way they are meant to happen and even if small details are different, the larger expression of the idea remains the same.”

That thing about being grounded in the present fits him so well too applying to how he plays in the Life Series. Often in situations where he has to think fast, improvise, unless instigated by someone he trusts, he can form strong alliances but he can break them just as easily. The present and hence what’s happening In The Moment matters to him a lot.

I gave him the KNIGHT class by definition, his role is to “Use his aspect to do [goal] and exploit Space” , using the land to make something useful and something pretty. Especially evident in the Life Series, using the land he’s given and with what he can grab hold of, he tactically crafts them in a way that both looks and has (defensive) purpose: >3L! The Crastle in general, unless broken in forcibly, defensively it is indestructible and (from what I remember) was one of the only landmarks in 3rd Life to survive in one piece. She was perfect u_u,,, >LL! Ice Fort I could go on abt the the ethubs symbolism in the materials they pick- but the fort is built in a way that is used to hinder the movement of enemies (soul sand floors, snowy walls)  whilst putting them on a physical high ground advantage. >DL! Mid Century Modern House. While from appearance the most harmless-looking of bases from an outside it’s probably one of the most sustainable. Easy access to crops, livestock, horseys, to even an easy escape route/panic room when things get worse. Not to mention it was the only base that survived the Boat Boy’s wrath (but maybe that was cuz those couples were close but i digress) All these builds and his builds in all his series are just very pretty! This trait is also very prevalent in his redstone :]

I also read that Knights of Space are like “jacks of all trades” - He’s very skilled at a lot of stuff and Knight of Space made me think of him ^u^!!

[ ETHO : Mage of Breath ] Tbh not AS certain for his classpect but so far I interpret him as very free-spirited, he kinda gets to do what he wants- he’s also very flexible and adaptive without needing to necessarily change himself for anyone in compare to the Mind aspect that deals with switching between roles/masks to fit a situation. Like,,, in the life series he doesn’t Need to adopt a persona or roleplay a role to be interesting when him being himself is entertaining enough etc etc (?) BUT the mind aspect for its sense of balance and rational thinking fits him also -- I just like him as a Breath player :>

Instead focused the logic component of Etho for this analysis comes from his mage class “One who knows/with Breath” by experiencing their aspect-freedom. Etho as a mage of breath I’d constantly on the move whether willingly or by force.

“They know every loophole and twist and turn and can navigate their way around even unfamiliar territory. For some reason I could see a Mage of Breath being very good at parkour type activities. They’ve been forcibly moved around, had their roots torn up more than once, so they’ve learned to quickly settle into strange places or pack up shop and get out without a trace as they need.” “They understand how to give themselves more options in almost any situation, how to place any odds in their favor as needed. They can weasel out of anything.“

To me explains his play style in the life series quite well, especially with the tactical makeshift alliances etc. 

Also I read somewhere knights unconsciously gravitate towards knowing classes like mages and I find that very fitting :]

-

Maybe I’ll expand on these one day - im sure theres like hundreds of evidence that could support these from other serieses they’ve done/been a part of. But for now using the life series and pieces of hermitcraft acts as a good starter point when psyche and The Social Game in those serves as a great source when thinking about stuff like this!

[marbles-for-breakfast]

Dear original asker,

✋ We’re getting harmed. We’re getting harmed and we’re not even endo.

How? Well, it’s harmful to tell people their real experiences of the world are wrong, just because you say so. Just because you think it’s impossible. Why should I care what other people think is possible when I’m talking about my own experiences?

How is telling endos that they don’t exist and must just be delusional harming me if I’m not endo? Well, you can read the pinned post on my page, but TL;DR: Anti-endos tend to assume everyone who is pro-endo is endo themself. And while I don’t identify as endo, I don’t have any recollection of the kind of childhood trauma that is normally associated with CDDs, and I haven’t chosen to assume I do have that trauma and I just have repressed memories (because why would I do that?). I don’t identify as endo mostly because I don’t like origin labels. They don’t even really make sense to me a lot of the time. (I get why they exist and I don’t have a problem with other ppl using them, it’s just not something that we find helpful, and really hate the way people have come to care so much about them.)

I say you’re harming people because you are. It’s not you specifically (to my knowledge), and it’s certainly not the most harmful thing (to me), but it is harm. And I don’t think it helps you to hate us as much as you think it does. (Read my pinned post if you’d like more on this point.)

Anyway, I hope that answers your question?

Some of us are already struggling to come to terms with being a system, and this stuff really does make it worse. That’s the harm. (Also telling ppl who might well have dissociative disorders that they’re not real. That’s, uh…. Not Good.)

Dang I feel all over the place while writing this (I think multiple ppl wrote parts), so sorry if it feels that way ig. Idk, man. It’s early.

okay I have some a question for anti endos. why do anti endos resort to

1) you're ableist

2) get a hobby/job/life

3) you're harming people

like. explain why any of these would be a good point to make, especially explain point 2 without ableism, and explain how endos are reinforcing points 1 and 3?

in point 3, who is getting tangibly harmed, and how? please provide practical points in a valid argument, without strawmen or other logical fallacies such as, e.g. "they're pushing research into CDDs back" (this is a false binary/slippery slope, and also a strawman)

Why is “they’re pushing back research into CDDs” a strawman argument?

[astrobiche]

Astro notes 8 🌙

Take what resonates y'all 🔱💛

💫 Aquarius/capricorn placements can be late bloomers (especially moon/venus) when it comes to dating. Aquarius is traditionally ruled by saturn so there could be delay. However, while caps can still stay careful after trying out sth new, aquas may wanna experiment more after their first relationship/experience

✨ I noticed this in the charts of a lot of ppl with their 7th house ruler in the 10th house : they didnt experience romance as early as people their age, they dip their toes into the dating sphere later in life compared to their peers.

🌔 Virgo placements (especially moon/mars) LOVE recycling old things and finding another way of using something they have owned for a while. The archetype of virgo is one who plans and fixes and doesnt do away with stuff just because its broken. They can also be crafty (using old projects in new projects/an old candy box as a jewelry box..)

🌠 The way i looked into the charts of the most hardworking, top ranking students in my class and they all have a virgo mars-

🌕 3 out the past 5 leaders of the dance club in my uni are sag suns. What are the odds 😳

🌗 Aquas 🤝 mutables : bringing in change. Mutable signs see things from different angles and may question why things are done the way they are, hence suggesting new innovative methods to the "old". Aquarius is a sign associated with progress, novelty and rebellion so they also could introduce new ways of doing stuff. However, aquarius's fixed modality makes the change "snap" into existence, Saturn's influence can still cause delay until the aquarius placement native just rebels and blurts out "alright, out with the old". While mutables can be in constant change so its not as shocking.

Tw : mention of seggs

🌙 I dont think its talked about enough just how seggsual cancer placements can be!! The moon rules fertility and the womb after all

🌘 the difference between 5h stellium vs 8th stellium on the topic of seggs : the former tends to focus on pleasure while the 8h stellium focuses on intimacy. (A conversation I witnessed : 5h stellium : - I wanna try all positions and experiment and have fun in the act / 8h stellium : i prefer to stick to romantic positions like missionary) - the rest of the chart can influence this -

End of tw

🌟 A planet in the house it rules works to its full potential. Example : 9h jupiter and ive always been called "wise", I once chose to write a book for a school project (education) about a girl who travels the world (travel) in search for (wisdom), I know a couple 12h neptune natives and their intuition is soo on point they can detect lies from miles away

☀️ Gem and sag are both on the learning axis, but i noticed gems tend to remember the names of the authors and specific quotes taken from books while sags remember just the general concept and ideas

✨I think its pretty funny how a famous kitchen appliances brand is named "taurus" 😭

🌗 Virgo + aqua (personal placements) in a chart = a walking microscope. They be picking things apart as a hobby 🧐

☀️ Sag 🤝 pisces 🤝 leo placements = dramatic squad. It's not talked about enough how dramatic Jupiter ruled signs can be. The planet expands and inflates and this goes for reactions/emotions too

💫 Scorpio 🤝 taurus 🤝 cap 🤝 cancer placements = seeking/feeling comfortable in control. While scorpio/taurus may want it for power, cap/cancer may want it for the sense of stability they get

🌟 Virgo 🤝 scorpio 🤝 aquarius placements = detective squad

🌠 Aries mars culture is getting mad around ppl who do things slowly. My aries mars mom when she saw me (virgo mars) taking my time doing chores to make sure its all perfect she got irritated "omg let me do it myself I enjoy speed!"

🌙 Saturn - ascendant /capricorn risings / 1H saturn natives can have this aura of respect around them. It's hard to explain but they can command respect when they walk into a room, they have the "don't mess with me" vibe even if they have a "soft" rising like cancer or pisces (ex : people apologizing to the natives when they say curse words around them)

[kendrixtermina]

The characteristic Mental Activity of the Enneagram Types

I made this as a reply somewhere but then I realized it should prolly be its own post. This is partially based on what Chapters of "The Dynamic enneagram" Tom Cordon has made available as e books but I could sort of puzzle it together for the other types based on all other subjective experience reports I've witnessed.

Since outer traits are influenced by culture & circumstances & subject to the imprecisions of objective self assessment & the understanding & reliability of descriptions, I'd say the one way to know for sure is the inner mental activity; this you could know even if you were a brain in a vat, and everything else follows from this anyway.

1: Constantly comparing what they encounter with an inner image of what it should/ could be. often a static image

My observation is that mbti Si users tend to say they "always notice when something is out of place" whereas Ni users say they "immediately see how things could be improved"

Also have this thing of resisting "bad" impulses by turning them into their opposite

2: Hyper people-focussed. Experience it as 'sending' themselves over to the other person, thinking of them intensely etc. & thus picking up what that other person feels. Touchy feely, lots of eye contact.

(they do this by copying the other person's body language, talking speed etc., though they might not consciously notice this - but this presumably does help to run a “simulation” of the other person’s state)

3: Typical activity is either a) paying close attention to what people seem to want, expect , how theyre reacting to you etc., always sensing this & being able to match it if desired b) focussing on an image and the acting that way. Being like your favorite celebrity, someone you admire or just some ideal you think is worthwhile.

4: Intuitive association chains - one thought sparks another, which might spark a memory, a feeling, a symbol etc. can dwell a lot on the past, inner fantasies or be impacted by things in the environment, all of which tends to build up emotional charge. ‘Synesthetic’/ ‘kaleodoscopic’, cross-context quality. Tend to immediately notice the differences between themselves and others when entering a new situation.

5: Intellectualized/ abstract view of everything. Constant mental sorting of things into categories, contrasting distinctions, looking for underlying principles, building mental models of stuff... in any case, forming conclusions/observations about what is happening as it happens.

Very little intuitive "people sense" or ability to learn it by copying.

6: A lot of replayed mental worst case scenarios. Can be visual (in that case the threat is often big & towering) but in any case it's intense kind of like it's already true/ already happening: This will go wrong, that will go wrong and then because of it that will happen... etc.

Some are just very cautious ppl, others can have a tendency to throw themselves into high-pressure situations because the worried thoughts stop to a degree if you snap into crisis mode.

Are also good at picking up allegiances, hidden intentions, inconsistencies etc.

7: Mental activity filled with a) anticipation (picturing good scenarios that might happen, fun things you might do, exciting possibilities etc.) - opposite of 6 kind of, the racing thoughts are good stuff, though it can get frantic/manic, and 7w6 and 6w7 would have a mix. b) reframing - when something bad happens, you'd reflexibly try to see/ find the good in it or at least be ok with it

8: Sort of feel their own existence by feeling their limits - always looking to make an impact, cause a reaction, have a tangible effect. Sort of always feels they need to amp up the vitality/energy/ actively make things happen. Does not expect to get things easily from others, (or at least wants to make sure to get them) so they'd be looking to have a 'strategy' or 'leverage' so they do not get screwed over.

9: No such dominant pattern, rather completely open to/ taken in by outside impressions, absorbed in what your conversation partner is saying, what youre currently experiencing or even what you're imagining etc. hence poor shielding towards & high sensitivity to negativity & conflict . Since one's own responses aren't being tracked they take a moment to access. - thinking is a lot more kinesthetic & fuzzy than precise and verbal. Strongly feel physical comfort or lack thereof, might have a big imagination as well.

You'll know you hit the right one when you think "wait, other people don't do this?"

[mockiery]

Hey. Hey. Pspspsppss. Explain your writing process to me. Please?

asjdghs ok in all seriousness idek fam. it's very disorganized and nonlinear and irregular af. much like this answer that got away from me so i'm gonna put it under the cut <3

i start with an Idea™ that has bonked me over the head. i am then possessed by the Idea, and i dump the concept onto a page in onenote as quickly as possible. it pours out of me like a fountain and the scene just kinda. creates itself.

it's pretty much always dialogue that comes to me first, with some major framing and emotional beats of surrounding paragraphs. sometimes the dialogue doesn't come for certain parts of the scene or i already have a vision of this particular section, so i'll describe the scene simply in a paragraph and sometimes later i'll come back and flesh it out. dialogue is something that tends to be the easiest for me. maybe not always voice for some characters, but their meaning and character-drive, absolutely.

and then from there, once the possession ends and what i have is out of me, it's mostly just. staring at the doc and making minor edits and additions around it over the next few days and/or weeks until i get bonked over the head with Idea: Part 2 Electric Boogaloo and so forth, always scrambling to keep up with them.

since writing mk fic and being actually interactive with other ppl and posting my writing, i've started sharing more little bites or even full drafts of my stuff and getting feedback, which, a lot of the time, is like. keysmashes and feral all caps comments, but they definitely help me know what's working and help me in the motivation department. recently i've specifically had the lovely @fdelopera help me out with full blown beta reading and some editing, they have been an absolute godsend (ily btw, tysm 💕).

Music helps me get in the zone sometimes, and keep me on track. I listened to Motion Sickness by Phoebe Bridgers about halfway through writing "your grounding touch", and it gave me some ideas about imagery and sensory stuff i wanted to focus in on more. There are also details in that fic inspired by some of the lyrics, if u feel like looking. It's also a general Vibe and a good marc song.

Music is just generally good for ideas for me too. Very good for calling on the Bonking of Ideas. When I'm hyperfixated on something i make a playlist about it so I can be in that world all day. I'm an all-day music listener, it's essential. (though when i get in the writing zone it can be silent and I won't notice for like an hour or two).

There's also the focus aspect of music too. If i start to associate one song with a piece, I'll listen to that song on repeat while I'm at work and it keeps my adhd brain on track (or close enough to it) so I can keep thinking about and planning it even while i'm busy.

I rarely write anything wholly linear, some parts getting expanded later after what was going to be minor edits snowballed into another few hundred or even thousand words. originally in "your grounding touch, marc's initial scene with layla was a lot shorter, and when writing, the first line for a while was him asking layla what she saw during their blackout. the section of steven's scene with layla researching DID was originally one paragraph before i fleshed it out and gave it dialogue, and was blessed with "you're based on the hero." and then jake at the end of was a late game addition only in the last 2 drafts, but felt essential.

sorry i rambled a lot there but that tends to happen when u let me talk about my writing, so thank u for enabling me <3

[hairetikaos]

These are just some thoughts I had recently about being autistic that I need to let out:

CW: autism and interpersonal relationships

Why ppl tend to associate extroversion with a high level of social skills?

My boss recently said something like this to me: "Oh, but you're so extroverted, empathetic, and sociable, and you have great communication skills." No, I'm not; I'm just a dumb girl talking about my special interests out loud, which, luckily, happens to be my job too.

And I think she doesn't remember, but months ago, we went to drink something to celebrate a huge event we pulled through, and there were a lot of ppl, not only my team, after a while, it was nice, but I was getting so nervous.

I felt a meltdown coming; my ears hurt; loud music and people talking very loud near me were not a good combination. I just had to leave the place crying and covering my ears; I was about to have a panic attack.

My social skills are level potato, and my ability to mask things deteriorated with the pandemic. Since I started to acknowledge my autism, I began to analyze so much stuff, and many things are falling into place.

At the same time, I'm afraid to tell my boss and my team members that I'm autistic because of this. Well, I'm so scared to tell my family too; only my gf and a few friends know about it and Idk what to do. 😢