#i still can’t get over some of the scenes with the bg characters like. man. they’re literally walking jokes my dudes

[deus-ex-mona]

i support aizo stan x aizo stan (women’s wrongs edition)

[ofbloodandbullets]

So it’s recently come to my attention that not everyone in the world has actually watched The Old Guard (WHO KNEW?!) so I’m going to try and do some info dumps about the world, the general canon and Andy’s history, personality, powers etc.  This will ... probably get kinda lengthy. 

Also: MAJOR MAJOR SPOILERS FOR COMICS & MOVIE.

The first thing you need to know is that for the main part, the history and the world that TOG takes place in is the exact same one as the real history of the world.  It’s set in modern day, though the plot points stretch back to 7k+ years ago.  It’s also important to note that there is a lot of historical inaccuracies and some things in canon that conflict themselves so it’s best to just take it all with a grain of salt and just go with what works best for your particular preferences etc. 

The main difference between reality and TOG is that in TOG there are a very minute like .00000000002% of the population that are immortals.  Now, it’s important to note that these people can die but they resurrect pretty close to immediately after they die no matter the amount of damage done.  Now it can take some time to fully heal or reform, depending on how extensive the trauma (being blown to bits or burned etc. will take longer to fix but there’s no amount of damage that we know of that can actually keep them dead).  

There are times when, for reasons unknown to the characters in character (or to us as readers  of the comics / viewers of the movie etc) that the immortality just stops.  There’ll just be a time that they suffer injuries that just don’t heal, and they die.  There doesn’t seem to be any rhyme or reason to this, be it age, number of times they’ve died, whatever.  Now, I have my own entirely headcanon and personal preference based theory which you can find HERE but it’s totally just a random idea that I had that I liked to explain the loss of Andy’s immortality in the movie (that doesn’t happen in the comics) and lets me say that she regains her immortality post canon so that I can nudge things back in the direction of the comics for post movie plots and so on.

Andy is, as far as we know, and as far as she knows, the oldest (human) immortal, coming in at around 7,000 years old.  She was born into a tribe, the Scythia (hence what she’s generally called: Andromache the Scythian).  A nomadic warrior tribe that I headcanon to be a matriarchy, Andy was betrayed by the ‘queen mother’ when she was sixteen and killed in battle because the leader feared that Andy posed a danger to her continuing rule.  This person was practically a mother to Andy and it was a horrific betrayal.  What was almost as shocking to Andy was the fact that she got back up again after being literally stabbed in the back and killed.

In the vein of trying to thwart prophecies making them happen, Andy killed the matriarch and took her placce ruling the tribe, eventually becoming a God King to her people and ruling over them for hundreds of years until her loneliness absolutely overwhelmed her and one day she just vanished.

At some point after this, she began to dream of a woman, feeling a pull towards this stranger that she couldn’t begin to explain.  After dozens, maybe hundreds of years, she managed to track down the woman in question (Noriko in the comics, Quynh in the movie) and realized that they’d been dreaming of each other.  (In the comics she meets Lykon before Quynh/Noriko, whom she had also been dreaming of).  

Now, the connection between these immortals isn’t explained in canon, and for a long time, Andy, Lykon, Noriko (and eventually Joe, Nicky, Book) thought they were the only ones but there is a scene in the second set of comics that implies that there are other ‘packs’ of immortals.  I headcanon that it’s a ‘like calls to like’ / kind of Sense8 simpatico type thing - like minded souls drawn to each other, which is why Andy and the others didn’t know about the other immortals, but again, that’s just entirely my thoughts on the matter. 

Lykon is the first to succumb to the loss of immortality, a short couple hundreds years after he and Andy find each other.   He dies on a battlefield, one that he and Quynh/Noriko and Andy fought on like a hundred/thousand before, champions for the abused etc.  Skip forward a couple hundred years again and enter Joe & Nicky, a Knight and a Muslim warrior who kill each other on the battlefield only to both wake up and spend (an unspecified amount of time) hunting and killing each other before eventually Andy & Quynh/Noriko find them.  In time, Joe & Nicky realize that they love each other.   (Important to note that Quynh/Noriko and Andy were also lovers).  In the movie, when the first major surge of witch hunts began, Quynh/Noriko and Andy go to help the women that stood accused, only to be captured and accused of witchcraft themselves.  After being hung, drowned, burned at the stake and coming back to life every time, the witch hunters settled on locking Quynh into an iron coffin and dropping her into the ocean.  (In the comics, Noriko is lost at sea during a massive storm that had thrown their ship entirely off course with Andy having no clue where they actually were at the time.) 

Joe & Nicky arrive in time to rescue Andy, but Noriko is already gone and despite spending decades tracking down every person even remotely involved in the so called ‘investigation’ into the women’s inquisition and punishment, Andy wasn’t able to find anything about where Quynh could be. 

Cue angst & depression & guilt for ages after.

The trio still steps in over the following decades, trying to help prevent the worst of atrocities, but Andy quickly begins to spiral into an, at best apathetic, at worst, entirely distant and withdrawn mindset and steadily begins to lose hope that they’re actually making any difference at all.

Skip ahead a century or two and enter Book; a Russian conscript who had been forced into the fight after being convicted of forgery.  Hung for desertion, Book spend days dying over and over again as he hung there, unable to attempt an escape until the troops finally packed up and moved on.   He and Andy, Nicky and Joe meet up and Book kinda reluctantly joins their little group.  It’s revealed that Book dreams, still, of Noriko/Quynh and while he can’t tell where hse is, dreams of her still dying, drowning on the floor of the ocean over and over and over like she had been for the last hundred or two years.  

Book returns at some point to his mortal family which ended in disaster when his last remaining son was dying of cancer, cursing and screaming at Book for ‘choosing not to save him’ by making him immortal too, even though it’s something Book had no ability to transfer or make happen.  Between his nightmares, losing his son and a number of other factors, Book decides he wants to end it all but no matter what he tries, doesn’t die and stay dead.

Eventually he’s approached by a pharmaceutical company that has figured out what he is and wants to run tests on him to see if they can unlock his healing / immortality for other people.  Merrick’s company works in league with an ex CIA agent whose wife died of a horrific terminal disease who hopes that they can find a way to keep anyone else from dying if they don’t have to.    Initially it was just supposed to be him, but he’d set up a display to stream for proof of what he was / they were and the corp decided they wanted all of the immortals.   Book ends up betraying the team, and he and the others end up locked up and tested on / killed / experimented on etc.  

There’s another character introduced in the meantime, the first new immortals in centuries, an American soldier named Niles.  There’s a lot more that goes on here, but the main point is that in the movie, Andy stops healing from her wounds shortly after she tracks down Nile and is put into incredible amounts of danger when Merrick (the leader of the pharmaceutical company) captures Andy, Joe, Book, Nicky.  Book is devastated, Nicky and Joe are furious, Andy’s just tired.

Eventually, Andy and the others break free with Niles’ help, destroy the lab they were originally held in etc and set out to try and hunt down any other proof, lab results, anything that Merrick got his hands on during the tests.

The group meets and settles on a hundred year exile for Booker (which I think is one of the stupidest things - like, the man’s clearly desperate and depressed and lonely and mentally unstable so by all means let’s isolate him for a fully century) and at the end of the movie we see him stumbling home to his apartment six months later to find Quynh standing in his apartment, pouring and drinking a glass of water which is a whole power move considering how many millions of times she died by drowning.

In the comics, Quynh/Noriko was driven entirely mad and to the point of wanting vengeance against Andy for abandoning her and spends a while gaslighting Andy and torturing her physically and emotionally and what not until she manages to isolate Andy from the other immortals and scoops in to ‘rescue’ Andy.  IDK what they’re going to adapt this to in the second movie, 

Again, via the link posted above, my Andy slowly begins to regain her immortality (again, IDK what they’re going to do with the next movie).  

Uhhhh yeah.  So I .. think that’s the majority of what you need to know for canon info about Andy.  THIS is also an important PSA regarding my Andy’s history & her longest lasting relationship that has nothing to do with canon at all but that is part of Andy’s bg in every verse, even if it never comes into play.

[inevitably-johnlocked]

hey you any canon compliant angst no happy ending recs

Hey Lovely!

Ah, you’re an evil one, aren’t ya, LOL LOL!! Hee hee! No worries! I’ve had this one waiting for literal years, finally going to use this post as an excuse to post it up! Enjoy(?)! LOL <3

UNHAPPY or AMBIGUOUS ENDINGS

See also:

Major Character Death / Heavy Angst

Major Character Death / Heavy Angst Pt 2

One Lives, One Dies

John’s Suicide Before TEH

Dies After the Fall and Becomes a Ghost

John Has Cancer

I don't mind by beltainefaerie (G, 221 w., 1 Ch. || Pining Sherlock, Stag Night, 221B, Post-TRF, Angst, Longing) – Sherlock is more vulnerable than he pretends. Part 4 of Bel's Tumblr Ficlets

Pervasive Quietness by LittleLongHairedOutlaw (T, 545 w., 1 Ch. ||  Angst, Friendship, Pining Sherlock, First-Person Sherlock POV) – The hollowness left in Baker Street seeps into everything.

Human Error by YakuzaDog (G, 571 w., 1 Ch. || HLV Missing Scene, Angst) – Sherlock goes on a brief shopping trip.

The Hollow Man by HHarris (G, 639 w., 1 Ch. || John’s Chair, Introspection, Sherlock’s Big Feelings™, Post TRF, Angst, Emotional Turmoil, POV Sherlock, Pining / Sad Sherlock) – Still reeling from the apparent loss of his one and only friend, Sherlock returns to 221B for the first time after the events of The Reichenbach Fall.

Five Seconds by xXLadyLovelaceXx (K+, 658 w., 1 Ch. || Friendship, Introspection, TGG Pool Scene) – In the half-second before Sherlock shoots the jacket, John notices something.

Promise of Sussex by LittleLongHairedOutlaw (T, 705 w., 1 Ch. || First Person POV Sherlock, Sherlock Whump, Angst, Pining, Ambiguous Ending) – John tries to keep Sherlock conscious after he's been shot on a case.

Message Not Sent by Queerasil (K, 762 w., 1 Ch. || Angst, One-Sided Texting, Pining Sherlock) - Sherlock texts John after the fall and during the hiatus. The messages are sent, but never received. Sequel to WORDLOCKED, TSTM, and Wait, How Do You Play This Game Again?

John Will Never Know by bloodsoakedleather (E, 775 w., 1 Ch. || Fantasy John, Masturbation, PIning Sherlock, Sexual Fantasy, Rimming, Cock Sucking, John’s Red Pants, Pants Sniffing, Coming in Pants, Mild Kink) – Sherlock indulges in a spot of self gratification with the aid of a stolen pair of red pants. Part 2 of Johnlock Porny Ficlets

Words Were Never Useful by Jenn1984 (K+, 819 w., 1 Ch. || Hurt Comfort, John Whump, Friendship, Ambiguous Ending) - ALLEY BEHIND THE BOOKSTORE, JOHN STABBED. HELP NOW. SH

The Other Shoe by thewaitwasworthitlove - (NR, 1,053 w., 1 Ch. || Pining Sherlock, Angst, URT, Post-TSo3) - Sherlock realizes how deep in love he has fallen for John. Only Sherlock Holmes would manage to be more shattered than crystal dropped on concrete.

The Signs of Loss by LitLocked (NR, 1,103 w., 1 Ch. || Post-TSo3, Pining Sherlock, Self Reflection) – Sherlock's internal monologue after he comes back from the wedding.

Velvet by headlessjess (G, 1,155 w., 1 Ch. || TSo3 Fic, Pining, Angst, Jealous Sherlock, Loneliness, Sad Fic, Friendship, Bi-Curiousity, Dancing) – It's the day, the wedding day - John and Mary, getting married. And then there's Sherlock, in pain and in love, without knowing how to deal with it.

Imminent by LoyalPaddler (K+, 1,187 w., 1 Ch. || Kidnapping, Open Ending) – What did it say about a person if he recognized the feeling of waking up concussed, blindfolded, and handcuffed to a chair? Probably not good, that.

The Simple Separation Will Not Come Between Us by The Circus (T, 1,278 w., 1 Ch. || Hurt/Comfort, MCD, Violence, Heavy Angst, Sherlock’s Mind Palace, Prose) – The choice is simple. Real, and No John. Or Not Real, and John. For a prompt that says 'John dies and Sherlock loses himself in his Mind Palace’

Hold On by Jennistar1 (T, 1,300 w., 1 Ch. || Angst, Hurt/Comfort, Post-TRF, Hiatus, Friendship) –  Alternative ending to Reichenbach Falls - John knew all along.

The Talons of Sentiment by dearcst (G, 1,463 w., 1 Ch. || First Person POV, Angst, Unrequited Love, Pining Sherlock) – I promised myself long ago I wouldn’t succumb to something so degrading, something so vicious. I promised I wouldn’t let myself fall. But that was before him. That was before I met John. In sleep there is such bliss and peace, and as John slept on my shoulder, it killed me inside to know I was so close yet I could never touch him.

Love and Bombs by Spark_Writer (T, 1,696 w., 1 Ch. || Angst, POV Sherlock First Person, Post-HLV, Pining Sherlock) – Love and bombs aren’t all that different, John. In the end, they’re almost indistinguishable. Part 3 of Human Error

BBCSH 'Poor Mary' by tigersilver (M, 1,839 w., 1 Ch. || HLV Fic, Canon Compliant, Sherlock Whump / Mary Shot Sherlock, Angst, Hurt/Comfort, Pining Sherlock, Hospitalization, Missing Scene, Sherlock POV) – As the tin says above, this is a missing scene, set directly after Sherlock awakens in hospital after having been shot by his best mate's wife. Minor angst, some pining, nothing nasty; please don't be alarmed unduly.

Dying Changes Everything by whitchry9 (K+, 1,919 w., 1 Ch || Sherlock POV, Suicidal Ideation, Near-Death, Hospital, Sherlock Whump, Gunshot, Unhappy/Ambiguous Ending, Hurt/Comfort, Friendship) – Sherlock is having an existential crisis and wants to have a near death experience like John did to gain some perspective. “Shoot me John!” he insisted, gesturing to himself. John just looked at him. “Are you completely mad?”

Love Hurts by Grac3 (T, 2,215 w., 1 Ch. || Magical Realism, Pining Sherlock, One-Sided Pining / URT, Sherlock / John Whump, Angst, Ambiguous Ending) – In a world where someone's physical injuries manifest themselves on the person who is in love with them, John didn't think that there would ever be anyone who was willing to risk falling in love with him - until he got shot on a case, and it didn't hurt. Unrequited Johnlock.

glimpses through a closing window by radialarch (T, 2,430 w., 1 Ch.  || Hiatus / Post TRF, Vlogging, Pining Sherlock, Angst, BG John/Mary) – John starts a domestic vlog. Sherlock watches it on stolen phones, over flickering wi-fi, and aches.

It's After That Hurts by jonnyluvssherlock (T, 2,791 w., 1 Ch. || City of Angels AU || Fantasy, Fallen Angel Sherlock, Soldier John, Pining Sherlock, Friends to Lovers, Permanently Incomplete Fic) – Sherlock's an angel stuck as a guardian to danger addict John Watson. Everything is fine until he gets too involved. Now he has to make the choice, eternity alone or one life time with a man who may or may not love him.

You Paid Me Well In Memories by Ballykissangel - (K+, 3,149 w., 1 Ch. || Heavy Angst, Hurt, Comfort, Grief) –  It's Sherlock's birthday and John is not doing well. No matter how hard he's tried to keep on living, he knows he is going to give up soon and he isn't going to make it. Today is his last and only chance to visit Sherlock's grave to talk and give him his gifts: His dog tags, a book full of notes and memories and the meaning of love as Sherlock watches on in grief.

Out of Time by westernredcedar (T, 3,163 w., 1 Ch. || Wedding, Angst, Pining John, Sad Ending) – Somerset is a lovely place for a wedding, but what John hadn't accounted for was the getting everyone there.

fulfilling for other people by missselene (E, 3,957 w., 1 Ch. || Post S4, Oblivious John, Pining Sherlock, Unhappy Fic, Unrequited Love Confession, Virgin Sherlock) – When Sherlock decides to act on John’s advice regarding romantic entanglements, the results are far from what John expected. Part 1 of fulfilling for other people

Sink Like a Stone by pennydreadful (T, 4,348 w., 1 Ch. || Angst / Dark, Cuddling/Snuggling) – After defeating Moriarty at the pool, life isn't quite the same around 221B Baker Street...it's more peaceful. And stranger.

The Dance Lesson by bittergreens (G, 4,596 w., 1 Ch. || TSo3 Missing Scene, Dancing, Pining Sherlock, URT/UST, Romance, Angst, POV John) – Sherlock teaches John to dip. Part 1 of Goodnight, Vienna

Anticlockwise (Ask Time) by TheBookshelfDweller (G, 3,752 w., 1 Ch. || Metaphorical, Angst, Time, Unhappy Ending) – "Let me tell you the truth: Sherlock Holmes cannot beat Time." Time only flows in one direction, and we are stranded in it, carried by currents we mostly never notice are whirling around us. No one can walk backwards along the timeline, and maybe that’s for the best, because what if someone could? Where would they go? Or, better say, to when would they go? Most importantly who would they leave behind (or is it ahead)? In the end, despite the truth, Sherlock Holmes decides to fight Time, for John, for himself - for himself with John.

On the Steadfast Approach of an Oncoming Darkness by 2bee (T, 7,772 w., 1 Ch. || Apocalypse, Minor Character Death, Sort of Parentlock) – The world is ending. Not fast, but slowly, like falling asleep with a fever.

In The End by whitchry9 (K+, 9,677 w., 17 Ch. || Memento Fusion || Amnesia, Growing Old, Hurt / Comfort, Friendship, Heavy Angst) – When a brain injury leaves Sherlock unable to make new memories, John wonders how Sherlock will cope, and what it will mean for The Work and their life. Because after all, how can you live if you can't feel time passing?

All the Times Something ALMOST Happened by allonsys_girl (T, 9,049 w., 6 Ch. || POV Sherlock, Pining Sherlock, Canon Compliant, Angst, Friendship/Love, UST) – John and Sherlock dancing around what they dance around in canon.

The Haunting of 221B Baker Street by earlgreytea68 (M, 10,388 w., 2 Ch. || Post TRF, Halloween / Ghosts, Pining Sherlock, Ghost Sherlock, Stroppy Sherlock, Sherlock POV, First Kiss/Time, Angry Sex, Ghost Sex, Love Confessions, Open / Ambiguous Ending) – In which Sherlock Holmes is a ghost.

The Five Stages of Mourning, Plus One by SunnyRea (T, 10,557 w., 1 Ch. || Major Character Death, Pining / Grieving Sherlock, URT, Heavy Angst, Sherlock’s Mind Palace, Drug Use, Graphic Death, Depression, Unhappy Ending) – Sherlock did not want this, did not want another stalemate with John in the middle, a gun in Jim's hand. This cannot have happened without a sign. There has to be something he missed anything which said today is the day I kill for real.

There's So Much Labour Just in Breathing Lately by Susan (E, 12,708 w., 1 Ch. || Post-TRF / Mentions of S3 Events, Romance, Angst, Grief/Mourning, Grieving John, Mutual Pining, Meddling Mycroft, Therapy, Ambiguous Hopeful Ending, Infidelity) – The dreams he hated most – the ones that left him a sweating, shaking mess when he woke – were the ones in which Sherlock was just Sherlock. Laughing or drinking tea. Sitting across the table from him at Angelo’s eating pasta. Trailing his open hand behind him on the way to the bedroom. “C’mon, John. I’m about to have my way with you.��

we have never seen a greater day than this by Lediona (T, 36,420 w., 7 Ch. || A Royal Night Out AU || WWII / VE Day, Prince Sherlock, Soldier John, Alternating POV, First Kiss, Bittersweet Ending, Homophobia, Dancing) – Peace. At long last. It’s VE Day and Prince William desires to join the celebrations. It is a night of excitement, danger and the first flutters of romance.

Impossible to Feign by achray (M, 49,204 w., 12 Ch. || TRF Rewrite / Reverse Reichenbach, Suicidal Ideations / Discussions, Drug Use/Abuse, Mutual Pining, Friends With Benefits, John Accepts his Sexuality, Anxious Sherlock, Meddling Mycroft, Depression, Hallucinations, Secret Agent John, BAMF John, Reunion, Make-Up Sex, Ambiguous Ending) – Sherlock leant forward, his long fingers curving round to grip John’s.“I won’t let him win,” he said, eyes hard. “I will do whatever it takes to get you out.”

The Hollow Woman by ScopesMonkey (M, 51,335 w., 22 Ch. || Post-TRF, Major Character Death, Mystery, Romance, Friendship, Family, Angst, Crime, Reunion, First Kiss / Time, Nightmares, Doctor John, Jealous Sherlock, Jealous John, BAMF John, Angry John, Dub-Con, Rough Sex, Bottomlock, Possessive John, Villain Mary, Open Ending) – Forced to return to London sooner than expected, Sherlock falls into a case too close to home. Part 1 of the Hollowverse series

The Gilded Cage by BeautifulFiction (E, 326,887 w., 31 Ch. || Omegaverse || Omega Sherlock / Alpha John, Friends to Lovers, Dub Con, Reproductive Rights) – In a world where Omegas are the property of the elite Alphas, locked away and treasured by those wealthy enough to buy them, John never questioned his flatmate's secondary gender. Sherlock Holmes was an Alpha through-and through. Wasn't he? A chance discovery turns the world on its head, and John is left grappling to come to terms with Sherlock's past as events conspire to threaten their future.

[adobe-outdesign]

TIOL LIVEBLOG: PART 4

holy shit, game-canon character time

Note: I’m busy tomorrow, but I should be able to finish up the liveblog on Wednesday.

Spoilers under the cut:

Part 4, Chapter 1

I like how Joey is still into old-fasioneds like in DCTL

Part 4, Chapter 2

Joey Drew discovers how packaging design works

Part 4, Chapter 3

"we didn’t need Henry. he was holding us back. did I mention how much I didn’t need Henry oh god please take me back”

Joey: “I wasn’t gay for Henry” *NateA: “yes he was”

I like the contrast with Nathan considering Joey humble for not holding a grudge with Henry, but in reality he just stole all his shit and Henry left due to poor work environment

BATIM AU where Henry enters Joey’s apartment at the end and starts smacking him with a copy of this book

Henry is so bland that Joey instantly forgot his face rip

Apparently Abby is only the interim head of the art department. Not the impression I got from DCTL but whatever

not even sure if the archives are canon (probably not) but I wonder if Joey’s habit of visiting art shows factor into it

Assuming he’s not lying (which is a pretty big assumption) Joey made the BG rather than Henry. Makes sense, I don’t think they debuted until after Henry left

Henry: give me credit Joey: anyway Abby was my inspiration

“I half expected that you would be an animated character, not an actual human being” this is either more Joey-is-story-Bendy stuff, or foreshadowing for BATDR

bruh if you think people want an honest-sounding lie instead of a critique you’re not a very good art director

“a small man with a surprisingly low voice came over to talk to him” is a weirdly specific description but I don’t think it’s anyone or else Joey would’ve mentioned it

“I might even argue I don’t even have a subconscious anymore” Joey walks into his board meeting calls everyone a bitch and leaves

I feel like Joey’s reaction to Abby’s sketch is exactly how he reacts to the deformed ink creatures whenever they’re made

Abby’s like me in the “can draw realistically but can’t draw cartoons” corner

Part 4, Chapter 4

"I have excellent control over my emotions” is like, fucking hysterical

Joey spends so much of this book just dragging Henry into the dirt aljfd. we get it you had a bad breakup

“Boris was special” wondering what the hell that means

“Boris came to me in a dream, Alice was a pain in the ass, the Butcher Gang were a mistake”

“Something that wasn’t Bendy. I will never understand that drive” is a pretty clear nod to Henry wanting to be with Linda, which makes for a nice contrast with Joey regretting not having a family of his own

It’s weird, because Joey keeps saying he made Bendy, yet the scene in which he was made clearly shows Henry doing it. Like he didn’t even try to hide it

Part 4, Chapter 5

"I did make a mistake once. I fixed it” the only time Joey has done that in his life, ever

Part 4, Chapter 6

I’m assuming the chapter title is an intentional reference, given that this is a well-known song (not this remix specially, just in general

honestly I kind of love Sammy’s backstory

he blatantly says it wasn’t his birthday a page after he said it was

Jack just like, radiates Good Vibes(TM)

I can see why they’re friends. Jack takes all the attention off of Sammy who really doesn’t want it

see I knew Jack was gay. no straight person dresses like that

Joey has like, a major issue with having the urge to shove people off of high places

no one: Jack:

I’d also like to point out that this is canonically the first time they’ve been confirmed to be friends. This does imply some tension between them, probably because Jack’s need for attention rubs Sammy the wrong way sometimes

Sammy just walked up and made Joey his bitch. iconic

Part 4, Chapter 7

I like how Joey shows them the little animation of Bendy dancing from Chapter 1, nice touch

I have no idea how to take Sammy’s “you need a girl” other than he’s been drinking his respect women juice

Sammy: “maybe I’ll worship a God if you make a good enough one” Joey: “is that a challenge motherfucker”

In terms of characterization:

Henry seems right, nothing else to say there

I know some people have said Jack being an attention whore doesn’t fit with canon, but he mentions needing a quiet place to compose here, so I think he’s just the type of creative who can’t focus with noise and not someone who doesn’t want to be around other people by default. Him brushing off Joey getting their award is a bit more questionable, but I also noticed here that Sammy was the one who dictated if they both took the job (Jack obvs. wanted it but still). I don’t think him wanting attention and him being a pushover are two incompatible ideas.

Sammy is much better here than in DCTL (he’s not being an open bigot, for starters). I do question if he’s being a bit too much of an asshole though. Don’t get me wrong, he is, but I got the impression from BATIM (and the Hot Topic Q&A) that he can be an asshole sometimes, but isn’t 24/7. Seems a hair too aggressive here, especially as he doesn’t have a reason to be pissy. He’s not openly mean like he was in DCTL though, so like I said, it’s better.

[joneswuzhere]

hello join me in thinking about some books and authors that are, or might be, part of s5′s intertextuality

5.10 in particular offered specific shout outs, and also u know i’m always wondering what might be ahead so i have some ideas on that:

- first, as mentioned in a previous ask post, i know i wasn’t alone in keeping an eye out for 5.10 parallels to the lost weekend (1945) the film that gave episode 1.10 its name and several themes - or to the 1944 book by charles r jackson which the film is based on

- s5 has not been shy about revisiting earlier seasons, especially s1. altho i feel that 1.10′s parallels to the lost weekend centered characters other than jughead (mostly betty), a 1.10-5.10 connection involving jughead and themes from jackson’s story (addiction, writers block, self reflection) seemed v possible if not inevitable

- but like,, , for a hot minute after the ep, i was really stumped on understanding how anything from the book or film could apply, even tho the pieces were almost all there

- jackson’s protagonist don birnam goes thru and comes out the other side of a harrowing days-long drinking binge that could be compared to jughead’s one-night hallucinogenic writing retreat

- but jughead is struggling primarily with traumatic memories, not addiction and self control like birnam. and tho drinking activates birnam’s creativity, it paralyzes his writing as he gets lost in fantasies; he’s never published anything. jughead’s drug trip recreates circumstances that already helped him write one successful book. even the rat that startles him mid-high doesn’t line up with birnam’s withdrawal vision of a dying mouse, symbolic of his horror at his own self-destruction thru alcohol

- and maybe the most visible discordance: in the film there’s a romantic motif around a typewriter. first it’s an object of shame; birnam’s failure to write, tied up with his drinking, makes him flee his relationship. he tries to pawn the typewriter for booze money and finally a gun when shooting himself feels easier than getting sober. but with the help of relentless encouragement from girlfriend helen, he quits drinking, commits to her, and focuses on typing out the story he’s dreamt of writing. rd goes so far to avoid setting any comparable scenario that jughead has brought a wholeass printer into the bunker so there can still be a physical manuscript to cover in blood by the end, even without his own typewriter. the subtle detail of his laptop bg image is a little less noticeable than his avoidance of betty’s gift

- tabitha might be closer to a parallel than jughead is, but she’s still no helen. both refuse to take advantage of the inebriated men in their care, but birnam takes advantage of helen, financially and emotionally. jughead refused a loan from the tate family and now has resolved to deal with his shit before he considers a relationship with tabitha. instead of helen’s relentless and unwelcomed attempts to get birnam sober, tabitha reluctantly agrees to help jughead trip safely bondage escape notwithstanding. she even helps him get the drugs.

- whatever potentials exist for parallels to jackson’s story, they were not explored for this episode. ok so why tf am i even talking about this? what was there instead?

-  i have arrived at the point

- s5 has been revisiting s1, not directly but with a twist. and jughead’s agent samm pansky is back. u may recall, pansky is named for sam lansky

- jughead’s trip-thru-trauma is a story device tapped straight from lansky’s book ‘broken people’

- lansky is like if a millenial john rechy wrote extremely LA-flavored meta but just about himself no jk very like a modern successor to charles r jackson. both play with the boundary between memoir and fiction. lansky is gay; jackson wrote his lost weekend counterpart as closeted and remained closeted himself until only a few years before his death. both write with emotional clarity and self-scrutiny on the experiences of addiction, sobriety, and the surrounding issues of shame and self worth

- i feel like a fool bc after this ep i had been thinking about de quincey and his early writings on addiction (c.1800s), but i failed to carry the thought in the other direction, to contemporary writers in the genre, to make this connection sooner

- lansky’s second book, broken people, follows narrator ‘sam’, mid-20s, super depressed, hastled by his agent to write a decent follow-up to his first book, but too busy struggling with his self-worth and baggage from several past relationships. desperate, he takes up an offer to visit a new age shaman who promises to fix everything wrong with him in a matter of days. not to over simplify it but he literally spends a weekend doing psychedelics and hallucinating about his exes. jughead took note

- unless u want me to hurl myself into yet another dissertation about queer jughead, i think his parallel to sam - who, unlike jughead, has considerable financial privilege and whose anxieties center on body dysmorphia, hiv scares, and his own self-centeredness - pretty much ends there

- But,, the gist of the book could not be more harmonius with a major theme shared by the 2 films that inform the actual hallucination part of jughead’s bunker scene: mentally reframing past relationships to get closure + confronting trauma head-on in order to move forward

- so that’s neat. what other book and author stuff was in 5.10?

- stephen king and raymond carver get name dropped. i’m passingly familiar with them both but u bet i just skimmed their wiki bios in case anything relevant jumped out

- like jughead, carver was a student (later a lecturer) at the iowa writers workshop. also the son of an alcoholic and one himself

- i recall carver’s ‘what we talk about when we talk about love’ is what jughead was reading in 2.14 ‘the hills have eyes’ after he finds out about the first time betty kissed archie (at that time he does not respond as would any of carver’s characters)

- this collection of carver stories deals especially with infidelity, failings of communication, and the complexities and destructiveness of love. to unashamedly quote the resource that is course hero, ‘carver renders love as an experience that is inherently violent bc it produces psychic and emotional wounds.’ very fun to wonder about the significance of this collection within the s2 episode and in jughead’s thoughts. and maybe now in the context of the s5 state of relationships. or, at least, the state of jughead’s writing as seen by his agent

- anyway pansky doesn’t want carver, he wants stephen king

- i have too much to say about gerald’s game in 5.10, that’s getting its own post someday soon

- lol wait king’s wife is named tabitha uhhh king’s wiki reminded me of his childhood experience that possibly inspired his short story ‘the body’ (+1986 movie ‘stand by me’) when he ‘apparently witnessed one of his friends being struck and killed by a train tho he has no memory of the event’

- no mention of that in this rd episode but memories of a train could be interesting to consider with the imagery that intrudes on jughead’s hallucination. i still feel like it was a truck but the lights and sounds he experiences may be a train

- ok now we’re in the speculation part of today’s segment

- if jughead’s traumatic memory involves trains, then it’s possible this plot will take influence from la bête humaine <- this 1938 movie is based on the 1890 novel by french writer émile zola. this story deals with alcoholism and possessive jealousy in relationships, sometimes leading to murder. huh, kind of like carver. zola def comes down on the nature side of the nature-vs-nuture bad seed question (tho i should say he approaches this with great or maybe just v french compassion). also i can’t tell if this is me reaching but, something about la bête humaine reminds me of king’s ‘secret window’ which we’ve observed to be at least a style influence on jughead post time jump

- but wow a late-19th century french writer would be a random thing to drop into this season, right? then again zola also wrote about miners, which we’ve learned are an important part of this town’s history + whatever hiram is up to this time.  and most notably, zola wrote ‘j’accuse...!’ an open letter in defense of a soldier falsely accused and unlawfully jailed for treason: alfred dreyfus. archie’s recent army trouble comes to mind.

- since the introduction of old man dreyfuss (plausibly Just a nod to close encounters actor richard dreyfuss, but also when is anything in this show Just one thing) i’ve been wondering if these little things could add up to a season-long reference to zola’s writings. but i had doubts and didn’t want to speak on it too soon bc, u know, it’s weird but is it weird enough for riverdale??

- however,,,

- (come on, u knew where i was going with this)

- a24′s film zola just came out. absolutely no relation to the french writer, it’s not based on a book but an insane and explicit twitter thread by aziah ‘zola’ wells about stripping and? human trafficking?? this feels ripe for rd even outside the potentials here for the lonely highway/missing girls plot.

- that would add up to a combination of homage that feels natural to this show

- anyway pls understand i’m just having fun speculating, most of this is based on nothing more concrete than the torturous mental tendril ras has hooked into my skull pls let go ras pls let go

[pekorosu]

just a lil “if ash lived” headcanon that i need to unload somewhere bc i've been holding it in for a long time

- set within the manga ‘verse

- takes place when ash and eiji are in their early 30s... so around the mid 1990s?

- i don’t get the weird animanga trope where older = longer hair, so they’re gonna look the same... maybe with slightly shorter hair bc they get regular haircuts now 

- (note: i've always interpreted long-haired eiji as symbolic of the fact that he couldn't move on from ash’s death)

- ash and eiji will continue living in the states, idk if still in NYC or somewhere else. they’ll move around a lot though.

- ash will mostly remain underground as he had to fake his death after lao’s stab, but he does it in a "hiding in plain sight" kind of way. only a handful of people know he’s still alive.  

- ash spends most of his time on the computer, mostly coding, hacking, being a nerd, among other fun stuff.

- he also takes on “jobs” anonymously, and occasionally from max (who’s still into investigative journalism) when he needs info that can only be obtained through Dubious Means.

- i also like to think that ash's a bit of a hacker robin hood lol. but he isn’t doing it purely out of the goodness of his heart, as part of it is a subconscious need to atone for his “sins” and cleanse the gnawing and persistent feeling of shame that gets amplified when he’s around eiji.

- also whatever he’s up to these days would ofc still be Highly Dangerous and Illegal, but it keeps him busy and would sate the part of him that’s still hungry for adrenaline without him having to engage in stuff like active bloodshed or substance abuse. basically that’s how i imagine he’d try to cope with life the only way he knows.

- eiji continues to do photography and other part time gigs bc he does not like the idea of mooching off ash forever, and he slowly makes a name for himself.

- ash and eiji live together but they are NOT together in a romantic sense... not yet >:)

- therefore eiji will probably date other people in the meantime, which gets a little troublesome bc it's not like he can bring them home to where his secret Very Important Friend is secretly hiding.

- ash will maybe have one-night stands every now and then. or not. idk. this isn’t a very important detail.

- anyway there will be lots of clueless but mutual pining :)

- ash especially, is of the opinion that they should start living separately bc someone will eventually track him down, maybe someone who has a past or present grudge on him. combined with his current activities, it’s only a matter of time before eiji would unwittingly get dragged into his problems again.

- eiji is v adamantly against that plan bc he's sorta developed a debilitating sense of paranoia that ash might just get killed somewhere while he’s not looking. not that ash isn’t paranoid either, but his insecurities often tip the scale over to “eiji is safer away from me” than “with me”.

- basically they’re doing their whole “stay. no, leave. no, stay” dance all over again, but like, dragged out over MANY YEARS.

- you thought eiji’s letter would’ve cleared up any crossed wires? 

- HELL NO

- like yea, there was probably a beautiful honeymoon period of about a year or two after they reunited, before their respective trauma and issues started creeping in and fucking things up again.

- esp on ash’s end, i think he’d engage in a lot of self-sabotage. and eiji is only human, he has his own limits and baggage too.

- there will be a government conspiracy plotline but on a smaller scale compared to canon that i am unfortunately not knowledgeable enough to worldbuild on, but it will probably have something to do with cybercrime/cyberterrorism/stuff like that bc it needs to tie in with ash's hacking shenanigans.

- i've heard that sing ends up becoming some sorta political big shot in yasha? idk, i haven't read it myself, but since china’s rising status was mentioned in GoL i imagine the plot should relate to that somehow.

- therefore sing would also get to be in this story! 

- i guess this means yut-lung would come into the picture at some point as well, and it would be a good opportunity for a redemption arc but i haven’t given it much of a thought bc i’m indifferent to his character orz SORRY.

- look i can’t do plot, but i am basically envisioning a political thriller with a side of slow burn romance (wait, you mean like a rehash of canon?)

- i’m thinking max is the one who kicks off the story by bringing something fishy to ash, and they just end up uncovering more and more and MORE stuff as they keep going.

- so for like 80% of the story, ash and eiji will be separated bc ash will be busy spying or infiltrating something... and being at the center of Plot Things, while max and eiji will be more on the outside dealing with the journalist side of things. i’m fond of max-ash interactions but i’m also REALLY CURIOUS about max-eiji’s dynamic :D

- meanwhile sing will be like, half in and half out i imagine. he's versatile like that lol

- ...i did NOT mean that in a dirty way

- anyway, this will provide ash and eiji ample space to work out their issues separately, as i think living in close quarters for so many years has actually been aggravating them. ofc those issues don’t get 100% resolved by the end, but some time apart from each other to cool off and spend with other people should provide a bit of perspective.

- i want ash to make some NEW FRIENDS (!!!) that are on the same wavelength as him bc there’s only so much that he can tell eiji and i’m sure he gets rather lonely, so there will be OCs that he will meet in the middle of Plot Things.

- ash will get trapped at some point. preferably with sing so they can have a much needed heart-to-heart talk. they’ll have a lot to hash out, ranging from the events in BF, shorter’s and lao’s death, all the way to ash’s love life. 

- btw i like the idea of eiji and sing being close drinking buddies who confide in one another but ash is kinda, justalittle, not very happy about that LOL 

- i mean, it's not like eiji can confide in ash when ash is the topic at hand, ya get me? as for sing, he’s similar to ash in the sense that they live dangerous lives, so i imagine he just finds it nice to be able to hang out with someone mundane like eiji every now and then.

- not to say that ash and sing aren’t talking to each other at all, but i think they’d have a bit of a rift between them. sing probably does feel some resentment, both at ash for killing lao AND at himself bc he knows deep down that given a choice, he would’ve saved ash over his own brother. ash can sense that tortured vibe, so eiji’s like their middle man. AND THAT’S WHY THEY NEED A HEART-TO-HEART TALK

- (SIDE NOTE: i want akira to have a role in this too. i actually have a separate headcanon that happens prior to this story... kinda like an alternate GoL? 

akira goes to the states to visit eiji, but ash is also there, yeah? akira and ash start out sorta prickly with each other bc ash is all weird and standoffish and always cooped up in his room. she probably mistook him as a jobless model mooching off eiji at first since 1) eiji and ibe have never spoken about him back in japan (cuz he’s supposed to be dead), 2) why would eiji be living with some random hot guy? unless they met during one of his photography gigs? right??? 

and then she ends up witnessing them in the middle of a tiff, which makes her not like ash even more bc HOW DARE HE YELL AT POOR OKUMURA-SAN??? UNGRATEFUL JERK!!!

but over the course of her visit, she snoops around learns a bit about their history and gathers hints as to why their r’ship is kinda strained. also ash and akira somehow end up bonding (reluctantly) over their emotional insecurities and part on a friendly rivalry to win over eiji’s affections (which eiji is completely oblivious to. also akira may have been 100% serious but ash was just jokingly playing along with her (OR WAS HE???)). anyway long story short, ash teaches akira some cool tech/IT stuff along the way so that leads to her gaining an interest in the field. 

she won’t be able to do much in this story, but a minor role would be cool :)

 ^ a lighthearted gyoza-making scene amid all the angst)

- (SIDE NOTE #2: i ALSO want cain to feature in this, but bc canon provided very little bg info on him it’s hard for me to figure out where he’d fit. but i suppose that’s precisely why it would be great to include him, since i can just make up my own backstory! lol. for now, i think he should be connected to one of the new OCs to make him more central to the plot. or heck, he can be involved himself! ...yeah, i’m just salty about how cain was treated more like a convenient plot device compared to the other major side characters. we barely know anything about him even though he was one of ash’s most trusted allies. #caindeservedbetter2k20)

- anyway, back to the main story. ash (and his new "friends") barely escape where they’re held hostage. ash would be rusty with combat now as he’s spent the past few years doing only stealth work and being rather sedentary. 

- so there’ll be lotsa old man!ash jokes like them poking fun at him whenever he complains about his back hehe

- when they finally emerge outside they find themselves in the middle of nowhere! they then hijack a passing pickup truck and do a roadtrip back to civilisation. ROAD TRIP FTW

- at this point, quite some time has already passed and ash even has a fuzzy beard and mane and all. he’s standing at the back of the truck with a small smile on his face and the wind blowing in his hair, thinking GONNA GO BACK AND SEE EIJI, MISS HIM LOADS, HELL YEA 

- (bonus: this song and this scene is the catalyst for this entire headcanon btw)

(drew this about a year ago. i was trying to imitate the manga’s art style... and the ash i had in my mind was a little different. i’m too lazy to redraw, but he’s fuzzier now okay! MORE FUZZ! like an actual freakin LION!)

- meanwhile, eiji and max will get into some deep shit around this point? 

- eiji in the pic above was me imagining that the Bad Guys had tossed some damning evidence (eg. severed body part?) on the ground like “ash’s dead/ash’s in a lot of danger now so hand over all the info u have”

- and eiji and max are like. SHOOKETH

- this would be the 3rd time ash has “died” after all, and as they say... 3rd time's the charm...

- eiji almost gives in, but then max spits in their face like fuck no and then... yeah. they get beat up and taken away or something lol

- EDIT: hmm... what if the Bad Guy is someone IN the government, and he uses his power to get eiji and max arrested for aiding and abetting a wanted fugitive (ash). and then ash has to rescue them... JAILBREAK STYLE

- also it might be cool to introduce ash's mom somewhere in this story... maybe SHE'S the villain! mwahaha *drama intensifies*

- anyways they will get saved by ash and gang bc that’s just the way things go, BUT! only on the condition they already made it out at least 80% of the way bc GODDAMN IT👏LET👏EIJI👏BE👏BADASS👏FOR👏ONCE👏 

- (that is, after he overcomes the initial shock of ash possibly being dead again... again...... again............)

- there will ofc be moments of “oh my god, you’re okay” "i thought i lost you...!"

- something like this, because one can never have enough cheesy reunion scenes

- this will eventually lead to REVELATIONS (of the romantic kind, yes) 

- buuuut they will never say "i love you" directly to each other bc ash is too emotionally constipated and eiji is too japanese. it's okay, they will communicate it through heated stares 👀

- i would love for there to be a scene where they have to be separated again for Plot Reasons and ash sorta hesitantly goes all "...will you wait for me?" as a direct parallel to canon!eiji's "i'll be waiting" and it’s like,

- FINALLY! 

- FINALLY!!!!!!!!!! ash has finally allowed himself to ask for this, to let himself want it! 

- and eiji would be like OF COURSE I WILL YOU BIG DUMMY, ALWAYS AND FOREVER

- but i think it'd be hilarious if eiji pops up while ash's in the middle of the final showdown and ash's like WTF I TOLD YOU TO WAIT FOR ME and eiji's like I WAS WORRIED OKAY YOU WERE TAKING SO LONG

- idk how this is supposed to end...

- oh wait! since the plot is government-related, maybe Someone will be able to pull strings to wipe out ash’s criminal record (past and present) and give him a brand new 100% legal identity, as thanks for his efforts? or maybe ash (or sing) just does it himself somewhere along the way LOL. anyway, he’ll be able to start over with a fresh clean slate and finally work on recovery FOR REAL NOW. yes this is a happy ending AND it didn’t require him to go to japan /flips off canon

- ...i realise it’s never going to be that simple but W H A T E V E R

- (also they probably will visit japan in the future with that shiny new passport... gotta meet the in-laws and all y’know)

- who do i gotta pay to write this cheesy self-indulgent fic for me

[legionofpotatoes]

alright here’s ma thoughts on that flick I mentioned

we hatewatched a*my of the dead because we were CONVINCED “zombies in las vegas” would be an impossible concept to screw up, but in so assuming we obviously invoked a holy wager with the universe and got reminded, once again, that hoping for improvement from someone who’s dependably put out bad art is never a wise choice 😐

but we were honestly kinda roped in by the marketing??? and expected a goofy fast-paced flick with the odd traditional undead metaphor thrown in, framing some sort of relationship drama maybe or hell even nothing at all! we’d have taken pure indulgent storytelling, idk italian job with zombies in las vegas, I don’t know fucking anything but??? whatever this was???? spoilers below for it is time for One Of My Rants

I mean the main reason I really want to write all this and complain. this film here probably has the most unappealing cinematography I have ever experienced in my life and that is saying something. who the fuck signed off on that CONSTANT shallow-ass depth of field that imprisons your eyeline and turns every shot into bokeh paste???? and I mean every shot almost!!!! I promise if you think I am overreacting just throw a dart at the seek bar and watch twenty seconds from wherever it lands. it is horrifying to look at. at least it gave my girlfriend a good visual shorthand for what it’s like when I lose my glasses

why was sean spicer in this movie. did they pay him to be here. was sean spicer paid hollywood money for his scene in this film because fuck everyone who was involved in that decision

the legitimately baffling hints at the extraterrestrial origins of the infection that went absolutely nowhere and had no dramatic or plot-level bearing. we love to see the franchise sprouts fellas

yet another big budget waste of everything hiroyuki sanada has to offer. and bautista too I guess? I like him but man was this an odd career move

what was the crux of his conflict/resolution with his daughter btw. I understand it was rooted in miscommunication over their forms of grief irt mom but uhh… it was all rather clunky and didn’t land for me. I tried I really tried to buy in but something was wrong fundamentally with the groundwork there, it did not click and their catharsis felt unearned. I know there’s massive amounts of tragic baggage being projected there from the author so I’m not slapping any judgment down really;

but again it would be an easy thing to wave off if they just had a vibrant cast of lovable simpletons with good chemistry and the kinetic sense of plotting the trailers promised (and this premise never discounts good drama, either). but instead it was just two and a half (!) hours of meandering into situations the filmmaking instincts had no idea how to flow in and out of

to wit. I know talking about “bad pacing” is associated with armchair bullshit but consider the example of the scene were dieter does an out of nowhere little dance after childishly screaming but then still-killing a zombie, with the film framing this as a micro character triumph, and not a second later the bg soundtrack instantly fades into an orchestral score dramatizing a nearby mcguffin reveal, completely 180 degreeing the tone without a semblance of deft insert shot stitching or even I dont know a fucking jump cut maybe. now imagine this whiplash for 2.5 hrs uninterrupted

I will keep complaining about the length yeah because this was not a story requiring this much real estate to be told. Uhh in my humble and personal opinion, of course

[man sees zombie tiger] “this is crossing the line!” you can in fact write dialogue that is not utter nonsense that falls apart once you drill down its single fickle layer of referential meta winking. what line are you talking about. you have rules in this insane situation you’re in? total nitpick moment I know but it got burned in my brain for some reason. like a microcosm of the mismanaged dramatic instincts paired with weird writing that dots this movie. I am sure the director calls this either satire or genre deconstruction. I am SO sure

tumblr domino meme that goes from “dude getting sucked off while driving” to “entire las vegas literally nuked”

tig notaro is always great to see but once you know she’s been filmed as a separate greenscreen plate months after photography wrapped - cause she had to apparently replace some abusive asshole but that’s a whole other pig not worth fucking - it becomes impossible to unsee her odd detachment from everyone else in the movie lmao. it doesn’t really “ruin” anything on its lonesome but it is hard to unsee

why. was. sean. spicer. in. this. movie

a very simple key ingredient missing from fully turning lip service sympathy for main uruk hai dude into actual empathy that would generate meaningful conflict with hero family would be to spend a bit more time articulating what he internally wanted the most. because he was obviously trying to do something here with pointed agenda. a family, to have kids, build a caste system, save his wife’s head, return to his planet??? all of these could represent the bigger context in his psychology that spurred his vengeance but none of them are dramatically emphasized long enough for you to cheer him on. I’m not asking too much I promise. Articulating interiority of a mute character is pretty doable with deft cinema language, just gotta linger and hold a shot here and there for a few seconds, frame as his POV, donezo. I know this is also one of those like. “who cares” moments but the movie does, very evidently so, in making this guy an actual character. you can kinda piece it together and create a framework of sympathy for him, sure, but then again he ultimately becomes a foil to be killed and not defeated, so. Ehh whatever

quarantine zone stuff was not a wildly childish covid allegory quarantine zone stuff was not a wildly childish covid allegory quarantine zone stuff was n

the rooftop helicopter fakout at the end was such an ass-backwards, manufactured moment of what could be a simple setup/payoff it just pissed me off??? you gain nothing by giving sad dad five seconds of pointless crisis that flips right back to previous status quo ANYWAY, except for a weaksauce waste of runtime, which could be used instead to get inside notaro’s head and actually SHOW the remorse form as she took off, literally maybe even a frown playing on her face as she’s headed for safety right before we cut back to drax and the kid. just a simple-ass, minimal, momentary setup for what is the most basic filmmaking trick of creating macro catharsis moments. Just???? g o d if you can’t even land that shit why are you even doing any of this

that lil run final pam did was very very charming and super choreographed in a way that was the tiiiniest bit overdone

the whole intro with the simul-backstories and posing with family photos was just… oddly motivated. what was the goal? “here’s what we’re fighting for” vignettes? why? it’s not a functional setup in that vein. what was all that

also I am sorry if this is insensitive but the reasons most characters end up articulating to justify going back into the hell that destroyed their lives makes them sound seriously insane

I dont like complaining about CGI (honestly) but so much of it in modern movies can achieve higher fidelity if the animation is simply subdued. Do not overengineer and over-apply 2D cell methodologies and kinematics to each tiny twitch and movement in a hyper 3D model and I promise you. it will look a thousand times more natural. look at thanos in those last two movies. your rendering and detail are absolutely perfect with the tiger you just have to let stuff sit instead of constantly simulating swaying hair strands and firing off all facial muscles at once. great moment at one point where makeup zombie horse and CG zombie tiger are both in one shot together and just by unnecessary amounts of movement alone you can tell who doesn’t belong. again; detail, rendering, compositing, lighting, all picture-perfect; but y’all just gotta let the animation breathe sometimes, and chill it out

plot holes don’t really matter to me but it was kinda funny how lilly decided not to mention the enormous wrinkle in intel pertaining to an actual territorial tribe of intelligent zombies that require human offerings to let you pass, just so that reveal could play out in real time through the joyous punishment of the cartoonishly misogynistic dude

total chad move for mister uruk hai and final pam to rule from a rusted swimming pool complex

the ending with vanderohe oh my god. with the. cash stacks at the airport register. and specifically them working in his favor. that is literally something you do to get arrested under suspicion of theft. it was almost played for laughs and I respect that. coulda been goofier. make these movies goofy ya dorks

anyway, weird, weird movie. bad marketing. message unclear (something something sins of the father???), baffling editing instincts, literal worst-looking cinematography I ever laid eyes upon. Confidently dying on that last hill

[yakocchi]

(I’m the only one who knows Akihiko in this way...)

first i was like ...well i have 100+ tickets saved from that reading promotion so i was like might as well do the sebas route bc i’ve done everyone else’s but now i feel compelled to try rly hard on the election 😔 but the kiss avatars aren’t as cute as the hug ones from last year imo

i did one run on the first day in a hurry to get them all spent before the story fever was done (before i realized all the story fevers will be x3 whoops) so looking back through that rush... this route is not so bad esp. versus the others on the second half (dazai and count) 

further rambling behind the cut bc woops i realized i started typing a whole lot omg tried to keep the spoilers (for sebas’ route) as pretty vague but in terms of spoilers for dazai, count, etc. it’s all over

sorry if you don’t like reading run-on sentence hell, but that’s how my stream of consciousness works orz

but i couldn’t help feel like this route was kind of trying its best in getting the reader interested in faust. isn’t as bad as it was in dazai’s route where i feel like some ppl end up just sitting there going “i’d much rather be with charles wtf” lul to me it was like they’re trying to invest some interest in him but are delicate in trying to make him not seem too irrational in his motivations and antagonistic or else they get into a Will situation in which nobody likes him... and then when the route finally comes out ppl are too mad to change their mind lol.

i just feel kinda bothered with the second half routes bc at times they feel like parts of them only serve to introduce the new characters. which is fine, but like... it takes time away from the actual love interest and it’s like “beh this didn’t happen with a good bit of the other characters” u know. i actually think sebas’ route is the best in finding that balance. i mean with the count it’s justifiable that vlad consumes a lot of “space” bc he is a convenient vehicle (a childhood friend) to further understanding why the count is the way he is. charles essentially appears out of nowhere and takes a pretty active role as a rival, which is new for a ikevam route... but as mentioned before has the unfortunate effect of readers perhaps siding with charles instead of dazai. whoops

well thinking about it there’s probably people who read the count’s route and went “well i think vlad might have an actual case here” in terms of the terrible future he foresaw or w/e .......but the writers probably caught on to that and that’s why they threw in the part where he throws the mc through the door where she could’ve died a terrible death. WELL people still choose to stan. somehow. I MEAN with charles he essentially tried to “axe” dazai by trying to “help” him so mc will be all alone for charles to love or w/e but at least that wasn’t violence. honestly i thought charles was going to go apeshit given how the route took a good chunk having charles toil about his past as a killer (as he was an executioner) and how he’s worried that mc will judge and dislike him if she ever finds out about that

ok well with faust and sebas, faust takes up more of a “devil in plain sight” role where you know he’s gonna do something sketchy as shit and either sebas and mc will fall for it. and it’s sebas who really falls for it first but it was for loooooove man. it was very dramatic (given how sebas has that dumb cliched backstory but i like that dumb cliche) but i mean the man’s gotta have a plot somewhere

i’m surprised that vlad doesn’t actually have a proactive role in this route, granted that his route is the very next one in the schedule. i guess writers knew people would be interested in him regardless so they essentially left him out. which is good, more time for faust. 

but what really put surprised me is that they threw in another leo and count gay dads moment like the older routes have where the two of them are used to keep the plot moving so the main charas can go ichaicha try to take care of shit in the bg. i thought this one for this route was esp...... a choice. it makes me realize that their bond is something that’s really beyond a simple friendship? probably bc they’re both old purebloods, but even with that... the very few times the readers get to see the friendship between vlad and the count imo it’s always... strange. like i can’t really tell that they’re that close of friends? like yea clearly they were close somehow given that they built the magicke door together but still, it always gave me the “crazy friend but you stick with him bc he’s known you forever” vibe. 

like that scene (in the sebas route) where the count finally comes back and leo is the first and only one to greet him at that time... it was very heartwarming in that “old bros” way. you can tell that they really have each other’s back, like that time in the count’s route where the count embarks on vlad’s castle and leo is like “(i’m not going to stop you but) if you don’t come back by dawn... i’m going to go get you. because i, too, cannot die” whew powerful. it’s a nice contrast from when the count was very down after an event in the past and vlad doesn’t really comfort him and actually is more like “you’re weak because of things like this” (not the actual quote but it’s the same gist) lol. like i know why he didn’t support him emotionally because at that point the count was totally not down for vlad’s plans but yeesh

another vague thing from the route... i like how while the count is unavailable, leo more or less takes the helm as the caretaker of the mansion residents. like it’s only a minor part in the grand scheme of things in the route but it’s clear that leo does have great compassion in his heart. in the dazai route too, he’s like the only chara that tries to set dazai straight (albeit for a single scene). 

ok thats all i really wanted to say before this becomes some dumb leo woaw we love him essay thanks for reading this garbage lol

[hellreads]

Hi! Can you suggest some good immersive fics that will make me feel all the feels? Even better if they're series! Thank you I love your blog!!

hi there sweetie, thank you for loving this blog, lemme love you too!💕💖✨ hmm this is tricky, to ask me of all people for immersive fic recommendations because I always immerse (to me reading something I enjoy and immersing in it makes me feel like I’m an actress playing the part so whatever genre it is watch me get into it 100%) but I’ll try and make a list of fics one per member, where I immersed myself through and through (shit this is harder than I thought, btw WII stands for why I immersed lol ~ list under the cut) 😅 | 🍒

➴ Kim Namjoon❥ Let the Villain Win by @lemonjoonah​➴ Author/Yandere!AU | Author!Namjoon x Agent!Reader | One-Shot➴ Kim Namjoon, famous author and your childhood friend has been keeping a secret from you. His new book treads on such dark themes that he’s finding it difficult to write. Excited by the prospect of a sinister plot you offer him a piece of advice, “Let the villain win…”➴ WII: I love Misery by Stephen King plus its movie adaption and LTVW gave me reverse Misery vibes, I know most people wouldn’t want to put themselves or immerse into stories like this but the adrenaline rush of being in MC’s shoes? delicious, I felt like as soon as Namjoon’s plan came to fruition my body astral projected to see him in all his yandere glory.

➴ Kim Seokjin❥ In the Bleak Midwinter by @pcyheartgirlx​➴ Idol/Prostitution!AU | Idol!Seokjin x CEO!Reader x Idol!Chanyeol | Series➴ We’re all whores, we just sell different parts of ourselves.You own a multi-billion dollar company, servicing the biggest names in kpop, in more ways than one. Under the name “Starlight Catering”, you, your best friends, Damon and Maya, and your hundreds of workers provide stress relief for idols.You have partially retired, not because you didn’t want to, but because Chanyeol was your muse. He was all that you had time for and all you needed. Until Jin came along.So what happens when you mix fire and ice?You get smoke and all the lines are blurred.➴ WII: tbh starting this fic I never really knew what I was getting into, all I saw was Kim Seokjin and I was sold, I was never a Park Chanyeol stan before reading this but I ended up being one, there’s a lot going on in this series but to immerse and be in a love triangle between the two men and feel the push and pull plus intense passionate emotions they’re willing to shower you with will tear you apart, but don’t worry there are two doors at the end of the story you get to choose between Jin or Chanyeol. 

➴ Min Yoongi❥ Dead Leaves by wrienne➴ Detective/Infidelity!AU | Detective Inspector!Yoongi x Homicide Detective!Reader x Teacher!Jimin | Series➴ In which you (reader) are a homicide detective about to face the biggest hurdle both of your career and life.Married to probably the kindest but most boring man you’ve ever met and living in a town where nothing ever seems to happen means life for you is dull. Dull enough to drive you crazy with boredom and dissatisfaction. However, life changes abruptly when your old boss retires and a new man takes his place - a man you used to love (and sleep very regularly with) more than a decade ago. Especially when your husband comes home smelling of perfume, you’re unable to resist your more carnal urges and dead women start showing up across the city with unnerving frequency.➴ WII: I have always had a thing for working in forensics, profiling people, investigating crime scenes, and basically any investigator/detective/analyst work and this story right here helped me get that feel because there are actual cases they work on here with vivid descriptions to help that wild imagination of yours *wink* + the whole infidelity affair is a mystery you’ll have to use your deduction skills.

➴ Jung Hoseok❥ Bad Guy by @sweetbunnykook​➴ Mob/Infidelity!AU | Mob Boss!Jin x Wife!Reader x Mob!Yoongi x Mob!Hoseok | Series➴ After a brutal attack in Hong Kong, your marriage with Kim Seokjin cracks as secrets begin to surface and a series of betrayals find their way into the veins of the Hidden Tigers. Although Jin’s devotion endures, in his own definition, the reality of being a mob wife may be too much for you to bear.➴ WII: this will put you in a rollercoaster ride of emotions there are actually three members here that will make things quite hard for you, but I have to say BG Hoseok is definitely one of my favorite characterizations of him, though there will be a push and pull of emotions once you get further into the story.. also, you’ll have to go through so much because immersing in this one will hurt a lot to the point where your heart is almost numbed.

➴ Park Jimin❥ Neighbors by @jkeuphoriadreamland​➴ Neighbor/Stalker!AU | Stalker!Jimin x Neighbor!Reader | Series➴ Finally achieving your successes in life you never expected the distraction that came with your new hot neighbor. He, however, had been trying to get your attention for a much different reason.➴ WII: hey it’s ya girl danger lover (my tag line lol), seriously immersing in this one will kinda make you wonder about MC and her choices as if Jimin cast a spell on her, there is this psychological manipulation he uses on her and it will drive you to madness because you will still bend to him and find him irresistible + the kinks here = wildt.

➴ Kim Taehyung❥ Clandestine by @ditzymax​➴ Assassin!AU | Assassin!Taehyung x Assassin!Kinsoo x BF!Jungkook | Series➴ As a professional assassin, Kim Kinsoo has many shrouded secrets in her life. Some of them she shares openly with her loving boyfriend, but there are other things he must never know➴ WII: now I know you’re probably wondering if it’s possible to immerse in fics with named OC? as I said I’m an actress who plays the part when reading and to immerse into the enigma that is Kinsoo is a wonderful experience, this belongs to the list of the intense fics I immersed into and if you’re the type to go all out when immersing no matter what genre or theme (taboo) the story contains you’ll enjoy the intensity of this one because you get everyone’s POV as you go through making you understand each character better and there is actual assassin work here if you enjoy the stealth way, you’ll appreciate Taehyung and Kinsoo’s work and the people that work for them.

➴ Jeon Jungkook (I’ll list five why not? I have read way too many JJK fics lol)❥ Right of Way by fringesofsanity➴ Infidelity!AU | Cheater!Jungkook x Cheater/GF!Reader x BF!Jimin | Series➴ In theory, things were simple: your best friend was Jungkook’s girlfriend while your boyfriend, Jimin, was Jungkook’s best friend. In reality, things weren’t always that simple. And mutually exclusive.➴ WII: if there’s one story I will never shut up about? it’s this one, I always recommend this to friends, this is the perfect depiction of having a taste of your own medicine in fic form, immersing in this one will make you fall for Jungkook and hope for your own ending, but this won’t sugarcoat anything for you and that’s what I love about this story, but tbh I still think of my own ending every single night. sighhhhh.

❥ When You Least Expect It by @johobi​➴ F2L!AU | BFF!Taehyung x BFF/GF!Reader x BF!Jungkook | Series➴ You’re in love with your childhood friend, Taehyung. The problem is, you treasure your friendship with him far too much to ever risk losing it. Oh, and he’s quite the Casanova. At your wits’ end with feelings you can no longer hide as diligently as you once did, you ask him to set you up with someone, anyone, in a last ditch attempt to avoid a heartbreaking conversation.➴ WII: okay, me putting this under the list for Jungkook must expose which side I’m on but that’s not the reason why this is under his name, it’s here because I love his WYLEI characterization so much and if you’ve been reading this series too, you’re probably head over heels in love with the boy too? and immersing in this, feeling all the ways he changed MC’s life and the way he loves her? stop it i’m crying right now. T_T

❥ Only You by @sweetbunnykook​➴ Stalker/Lovers!AU | Stalker/BF!Jungkook x Noona/GF!Reader x Ex-Fiance!Namjoon x BFF!Seokjin | Series➴ Jeon Jungkook, your wedding photographer, helps you escape on your big day upon learning about a secret your groom-to-be kept hidden. You soon fall for this young, passionate photographer. However, you underestimated just how much he was willing to reciprocate that love. Maybe, you think, he’s loving you just a little too much.➴ WII: ahhhh to be Jungkook’s Noona, I love immersing in this because there’s so much intense passion here, and if you allow yourself to fall into the role you will understand the statement that Love is Blind that people will overlook anything their lover is involved in because so what if they did this or that? they only have hearts in their eyes, the manipulation here might get to you irl, like wow, seriously this was so brilliantly written, how can you not love Jungkook and give him everything right?  

❥ DNA by @btssavedmylifeblr​➴ Dystopian/Breeding!AU | Stud!Jungkook x Cow!Reader | Series➴ Jungkook’s career is in jeopardy when he begins falling for a woman he’s supposed to impregnate.➴ WII: the futuristic feels? amazing description and details? unique universe? if you’re up for those things this is one amazing read you should be immersing yourself into, I’m so in love with the way this was written, Bee and her galaxy mind will challenge you into painting all of her words in your head and you’ll have an advanced futuristic universe where babies are manufactured and modified to your liking but if you mix feelings into the process and what do you get? ugh, this is just brilliant!

❥ The Fitting by @noona-la-la-la​➴ Idol!AU | Idol!Jungkook x Stylist/Noona!Reader | Series➴ The younger Jungkook has a workplace crush on you, but you let the flattery get to you and make a proposition you can’t take back.➴ WII: who can ever say no to idol!jungkook? prepare to immerse into this tension-filled romance with Jungkook, laced with complications of keeping a secret “relationship“, so this is what happens when fire meets ice at work, and this being an idol!au will give you a glimpse of how they probably keep their affairs hidden from everyone and it can be stressful, full of jealousy, and fights.

➴ OT7 ❥ Void by @btssavedmylifeblr​➴ Space!AU | Space Crew!OT7 x Space Crew!Reader | Series➴ You are the only female crew member on a 12-year space mission with seven handsome men. The sexual tension is real, y’all.➴ WII: BEST.OT7.FIC.EVER. so why not immerse yourself and be the only girl in their universe right? this has so much sexual tension since they only have you sis, but it’s fun to get all the attention tho there will be stressful and trying times, the boys will compensate *wink*wink* 

❥ A Hundred Percent Human by wrienne➴ Hybrid/Host-Club!AU | Hybrid!OT7 x Human/Owner!Reader | Series➴ In which you (reader) are forced to take care of seven hybrids in a twist of fate.After your estranged mother passes away, you’re left with an unwanted will and the heavy burden of responsibility. Although you’re desperate not to stray from the familiar path you thought was laid out in front of you with a fully human boyfriend who loves you more than anything, your life is thrown upside down once more after another unfortunate incident (that may or may not have to do with said boyfriend) occurs.Drunk and down on life, you finally decide to deal with the house and the unsavory business your mother left behind. However, to your shock, you find that seven very different hybrids are included with both the house - and the business. Seven hybrids you never even met before - even less agreed to take care of.Set in the not too distant future where infertility has become mankind’s greatest issue. Will contain sexual content.➴ WII: what’s an ot7 fic without tension? majority of the boys are dog hybrids with certain classes and MC has no fucking clue how to deal with hybrids let alone seven of them with two of them being special classes/cases, this will be a little slow-paced as the story starts more on their background/history as hybrids and they’re still getting comfy with one another, which I think is a great way to pull readers in and grow attached to the hybrids.

❥ Moth to Flame by @bang-to-the-tan➴ Vampire!AU | Vampire!OT7 x Human!Reader | Series➴ Robbed of your memories and intended as a birthday present for a deadly creature of the night, you unwittingly become the center of a territorial dispute between two covens of vampires. Tensions are rising and the brothers are getting hungry.➴ WII: how can we pass up on vampire!ot7? this is a brilliant story that will have the same haze effect on you as the reader, I immersed hardcore on this one and I’m like who am I? it’s weird when you get affected and get all the phantom feels from reading alone you know? and this will affect you so much I swear to god it’s you literally transported and astral projected into this universe and it’s so pleasing but also frightening to be in the middle of two covens.

❥ Physcom by @teawithkpop➴ Dystopian/Sex Worker!AU | Idol!OT7 x Physical Companion!Reader | Series➴ AU where live-in Physical Companions are provided to k-pop groups so the members can relieve their sexual related stress and tension - around their busy schedules, of course. You are one such “PhysCom”. However, complications arise when the BTS members start harboring romantic feelings for you. Feelings you’re not sure you can reject with any believable amount of conviction. Such a scandal could result in getting both you and them fired and exposed, ruining any future career options for all parties involved… it turns out the “com” in PhysCom might as well stand for complications.➴ WII: this has an interesting take on being Bangtan’s “companion” and to immerse into this one and watching everyone catch feelings and defy the rules for a chance at romance will overwhelm you, you a mere “companion” now the object of their affection and they’re willing to do anything and everything for you even if it means risking it all. 

p.s. I suggest you go through my FICSHELF to view all of the stories I ever read so you get to choose the exact story you want to read, the shelf contains story links (Tumblr and ao3 if any) with summary, warnings, and more info about the fic (character role, genre, au, word count). 

[spiftynifty]

VLD Rewatch: Season 3

For a half-of-a-half season, season 3 packs quite a bit in and sets up a lot of plot. This shouldn't be surprising; Voltron was laid out as three 26-ep seasons, with each season bringing a new big bad and new theme. Season 3 is our beginning of the Lotor arc and there's a lot of setup and... a lot to unpack here.

For those who are still in "can't do it" mode about rewatching the series (which is fair), here's a quick summary to catch you up:

Shiro has been missing for (it's kind of implied) months. Without Shiro, Voltron and the group are fractured, especially with Keith's deep grief over losing Shiro preventing the recruitment a new Paladin.

Ultimately, Keith takes up the mantle of the Black Lion, Lance moves to Red, and Allura gets Blue. The group is clumsy and outmatched by Lotor and his generals who are definitely Up to Something. Keith tries to play leader and it's a bad look when he's making decisions via grief escapism. The team gets briefly trapped on a foggy wifi-less planet, discovers a bizarro alt-reality where Alteans rule the universe and Shiro is Swedish and doesn't mind Slav, and trails after Lotor and Co who have made off with the reality-breaking comet from Svavland.

Meanwhile Shiro escapes the Galra again, catches up with Voltron, shares a couple lowlit intimate moments with Keith while also awkwardly undermining his authority and jeopardizing the safety of the team, but no one suspects a thing.

Oh and there's a flashback episode about the OG paladins that I'll be honest I skipped since it turns out literally nothing that happened in the past is relevant to the present day and our only major revelations are that we (and Haggar) learn that she was once Honerva, Zarkon her husband was once kinda adorable, and turning evil swaps out your voice actor. Oh and Honerva had a cat who may or may not be as old as Haggar and potentially still kicking around.

Let's talk about season 3.

There's good and bad to be had with this season. Originally when I began my rewatch of the show I wanted to do it as though I were watching the season for the first time. Season 1 and 2 made that astonishingly easy; of all the seasons they seem the most confident about what the show is and what it's going for. Season 1 is for the mild setup and world building, season 2 is for the character building, relationship building, lion building, and problem resolving. Season 2 is arguably the show's strongest season overall so it's a tough act to follow. Season 3... makes an effort.

The good of this season is really good. Keith's grief over losing Shiro surprised and moved me the first time I saw the season and I was impressed with how long they held onto it given the show's habit of moving on pretty quick. Keith's grief holds the team back and endangers it; his early insistence on going after Lotor felt like a way to channel his anguish and maybe get a little revenge for his loss. Keith got one of his most significant character boosts in season 2, and following it through in this season sets up a complicated Keith that we will see for seasons to come.

The other good is Lotor. Lotor is handsome and charismatic and devastatingly cunning and is a polar opposite to his Saturday-morning-cartoon-villain dad. Zarkon was threatening, but Lotor is INTERESTING and his "wait and see" approach makes us the audience want to wait and see what he's up to. His band of generals are intriguing and colorful and I love the variation of their designs and personalities.

And of course, we can't talk about the good stuff in season 3 without discussing Shiro and Keith's relationship. Season 2 gave us some really fantastic growth and moments and entire episodes between them, but Season 3 brought a new level of intimacy that definitely bumped it up a notch. From the slow-moving reunion and closeups of only Shiro and Keith's faces, to their quiet moments alone in dimly lit rooms. This season gave us "as many times as it takes", which remains one of the most beautiful little exchanges between the pair in the whole series. The jury is still out on whether or not Sheith was a hopeful intention by the creatives on this show or just an incredibly happy accident, but looking at some of the decisions made in 3x05 and 3x06 especially lean more to the former. These scenes are more bittersweet now knowing how it all ends up.

There is a lot of setup for future things in general, and this is where it becomes difficult to separate what is in s3 with what will be by the end of s6 (and beyond) because some things we just can't unknow. It was really interesting to see how things that made me very hyped after this season now take on a bit of a disappointing and even bitter flavor because some roads really don't go anywhere. Lotor's mysterious plans for instance, only seem to get more mysterious, as do his allegiances. He spends most of this season clearly toying with the Paladins, clearly prepared to destroy them or let them destroy themselves, but later he sides with them and the Paladins seem pretty quick to forgive this and assume he's a good guy now. Lotor's "side" is never clearly established since his goals never are. The Lotor in s3 is interesting by virtue of the assumption that we will eventually learn all his secrets. But we never do, and that definitely for me taints him as a character.

Speaking of some mixed character motivations, s4 reveals that Narti was either a spy for Haggar the whole time or that Kova was, or both, and yet in season 3 Haggar sends a goon off to spy on Lotor. Even in Haggar's private moments she seems unsure of what Lotor is up to so this later reveal that she was aware the whole time is an odd one and still left very vague.

Similarly, major problems arise with Shiro in s3 but only via the hindsight of s4-6. Everything about the way Shiro is brought back into the fold in season 3 is highly suspicious. From a narrative standpoint I want to say it begins with Sven as foreshadowing, an alternate-reality Shiro who looks JUST LIKE SHIRO but is NOT SHIRO. Unfortunately I think this was less of an audience wink and more of an excuse to nod to the original Sven. But Shiro's Journey opens with scientists doing tests on him, Shiro's pupils dilating to the sound of camera lens adjustments, and Shiro literally seeing a dead-eyed copy of himself on a slab. The words "Operation Kuron" are repeated at least three times as the Galra let him escape. When Shiro meets the two aliens on the ice planet and they accuse him of being a traitor, Shiro protests, "I'm not a--" and never finishes. He does pilot logs into a Galra Cruiser as he tails Voltron. And that's just in one episode.

The next episode has him repeatedly undermining Keith's newfound leadership position (a position Shiro repeatedly encouraged Keith into in s1/2 to Keith's great reluctance), to the point of talking over him and shouting at him. He dismisses the safety of the team for the sake of the mission; something that goes expressly against the team Voltron way of doing things (Kolivan details this in s4) and is completely against Shiro's nature. It felt manipulative to me the first time and it still feels off when at the end of this he privately tells Keith "I'm sorry I had to step in back there", referring to Keith's failure (which was not a failure) and then in the next breath "you're good at this." This was the topic of many a heated debate when the episode came out but from my end there is just no way to see that the man presented here is Shiro and not an insidious clone.

There's a term for this that I forget where the storyteller essentially gaslights the audience for no real reason. Ultimately we will come to know that this is Shiro. A little more short-tempered but ultimately a good boy and not the potentially fully aware evil clone that season 3 hints at. It's bad writing; and the reason that it's bad writing is that the audience is privy to very little more than the characters are when it comes to Kuron and yet the characters are not in the slightest bit suspicious about the behaviour that we the audience sees as suspect. We end up gaslighting ourselves because of bad writing, only to learn that we were right the whole time. And genuinely, speaking as someone who loves all Shiros dearly, Kuron is a whole walking writing disaster. But more on that as we get further into the season.

I don't love the episode, but the Comet episode is a surprisingly adult-oriented one and presents an interesting flip to things and an intriguing hypothesis that I wish had been explored better, or longer, or something. As I've said 100x before, Galra aren't an inherently evil race; they're the result of a 10,000 yr universe takeover. This episode suggests that Alteans are no better, and the broader implications of this are massive and should have offered a much bigger fundamental shift in the characters and the way they viewed this war. In particular Allura, who previously immediately turned against Keith the moment his heritage was revealed, despite having become good friends with him. Her learning that her own people aren't immune to "absolute power corrupts absolutely" is a moment that is not given any real weight or consequence . This is a letdown especially since this potentially weightier-themed episode was self-aware enough of that weight to be the only episode outside of the Voldemort season to show imagery maybe a little too old for its younger audience (the repeated shot of the mummified Altean scientist).

From a production standpoint I noticed a lot of little things. There were a number of hookup issues; some hilariously drawn bg characters, some compositing that worked and some that decidedly didn't. Some of the editing was a little rough in places and some of the timing of things felt very off. There were some jokes that ran long and didn't land and threw the pacing off or stole time from other things. The editing on the Comet episode was particularly off and the characters were visually difficult to track at times. Also, there is definitely a different/longer version of the "As many times as it takes" scene even if it only exists in script or maybe board form. All of the Shiros in that scene were drawn by Ryu, who was often tapped for revisions (particularly for Shiro and Lotor). But the Keith in that scene is not a Ryu Keith; and Keith's "Well--" in "If you're feeling up to it" sounds like two lines spliced together. Ryu's fingerprints are all over 3x06 in interesting places; I definitely spotted his artwork in at least one shot of the Galra post leader and I think a Zethrid. He drew a few of the short haired Shiros as well. I think this episode underwent a number of changes; I remember too that Lance exclaiming "you're looking better" was originally Keith's line. At the same time we get little nice superfluous animations like the foreground gecko. Just a lot of inconsistencies.

Overall it's still an alright season but knowing what's coming means I just don't love this season the way I used to. The little moments that rock still rock but a lot of plot pawns were pushed forward that were ultimately just discarded. I can't wait to see if finishing the next 3 seasons will retroactively bump this season back up to where it once was in my heart. 

[violetrance]

I'm seeing a lot of people annoyed that Klance shippers are downplaying that recent Allurance moment in the clip & to compare it to the bonding moment is a reach etc. So I feel the need to explain/clear up why that moment is possibly hinting at A LOT, and why so many people are making a big deal out if it.

1. Lance has a crush on Allura. This has been known since day one, it is obvious. He has a clear infatuation with her and it has been shown throughout the course of the show. So some people immediately assume that he will end up with Allura. That’s fair, because what we’ve explicitly seen in canon is that he likes her. But what about Allura? We’re always talking about Lance’s feelings towards her and they’ve had some nice, genuine moments together, but she still as of now has not showing any romantic interest in Lance. If you compare her growing development and interactions with Lotor, they are very different to what she portrays towards Lance. Every time Lance makes a move on her, she’s either turned off or has no reaction to it. Now I’m not saying she can’t develop possible feelings for him as they go along, but it’s been five seasons going on six and we still have seen no indication that she feels that way. Which brings me to my next point.

2. In the most recent clip, Lance is clearly acting flustered towards her, saying ‘We make a great team.” But what is Allura’s reaction it? Nothing. She literally just brushes it off and says “Let’s go Lance.” So they can proceed with their mission. It’s obvious, even now, that Allura is not interested in Lance like that. Also, going back to my first point. Yes, Lance does have a crush on Allura, you can tell he genuinely likes her. That’s normal, it makes sense. But why does that make everyone immediately assume they’ll end up together? Crushes are apart of life, they come and go. Unless he’s in love with her and she feels the SAME WAY towards him, there can be no established relationship. Lance has literally said in his vlog, that even though Allura is great he’s not ready to settle down just yet because there are plenty of fish in the sea. Well???

3. No matter what you choose to believe, that scene and the scene Lance has with Keith during their bonding moment are meant to parallel each other. It’s just the truth. But you need to analyze the blatant contrast of the scenes and how they’re set up, the aftermath too to understand their impact. It was purposeful, it was done to show how Allura and Keith feel towards Lance, but how he feels towards them too. It doesn’t matter which way you look at it, the bonding moment was meant to be intimate, it was romantically coded. It literally parallels a scene shared with Hunk and Shay only a bit before, it’s PURPOSEFUL. If Lance says “I think we make a great team.” to Allura to show affection, what is making people believe that he didn’t do the same thing towards Keith?? If you compare Allura and Keith’s individual reactions to these moments, you will blatantly see what the show runners are trying to display. 

Lance blushes and get’s flustered towards Allura, claiming they make a good team. Her response is not really acknowledging the advance like she usually does, but instead continuing to go about the mission. 

Keith and Lance are holding each other’s hands, exchanging soft smiles and looks basked in purple mood lighting w/ slow music in the bg. Lance claims they are a good team, Keith smiles obviously happy. When Lance says he forgets the bonding moment, this intimate moment between them. What is Keith’s response? He’s offended, says that he held him in his arms like that’s supposed to change something? Not to mention how impatient he was to get Lance out of the pod before. Are you really trying to tell me he didn’t develop a crush on Lance after that moment??? Don’t even get me started on s3 and other past moments that further proves this. Also the head writer of the show literally saying Lance pretended to forget the bonding moment because he wasn’t emotionally ready to face it?? If that was just a platonic moment between two buddies, would they really make it that deep? No, not at all. 

Lance using those lines as a way to show affection towards both Allura AND Keith, literally shows he has feeling for the both of them. He has shown the same infatuated expression for Allura towards Keith before. They are literally similar to each other in many aspects, so he has a blatant type. Jeremy has hinted at his milkshakes bringing EVERYBODY to the yard, meaning he most likely is not straight. He’s said that something happens between two characters in terms of LGBT rep. So that means a relationship, who has been basically confirmed to have an end game romance? Lance. And if he has feelings towards both Allura AND Keith, you can basically do the math towards who he’ll possibly end up with. 

The only difference between them is: Allura does not have romantic feelings for Lance, but Keith does. Now I’m not saying this about Allura to pin her as some sort of bad guy, because this is normal behaviour. You do not always have to reciprocate someone’s feelings, she still obviously genuinely cares for him as a person and a friend regardless. But it is obvious, that she does not like him like that.

3. To go further, there was a newer review for season 6 that mentioned Allura and Lotor’s closeness and growing relationship has more than one consequence over the course of the season. It leads to some REVELATIONS for another character, which feels like a natural step forward on their personal journey. It’s extremely obvious they are talking about Lance. The creators also emphasised that his personal journey has something to do with respect, and rather than being a ladies man and obsessing over flirting etc, it’s about being a good team member & appreciating a person. 

Unless they’re mentioning something else, I would not be surprised if the consequences coming between Lotor and Allura’s growing relationship, is Lance’s one sided crush on Allura. Allura likes Lotor, Lotor likes Allura, it’s obvious that they have feelings for each other. Their interactions are probably the most blatantly romantically coded I’ve seen on this show. Last season you could tell this affected Lance a bit and he was kind of having trouble coming to terms with their relationship. This season, I do genuinely believe that Lance is going to officially move on from his crush/infatuation w/ Allura. He is not very fond of Lotor, but if he sees or knows how Allura feels about him, that perspective will change. He cares a lot about Allura, he wants her to be happy. Lance is the type of person who will go out of his way for others so they can be happy or comfortable, even if it affects him. We’ve seen this side of him more as the seasons go along, because he’s starting to mature more. That’s why he supported Keith so much when he became the leader, even though it was difficult for him. That’s why he comforted and supported Shiro a lot last season, even though he was probably afraid/nervous since he’s been changing so much. 

Him accepting the fact that Allura has feelings for Lotor instead of constantly flirting with her or being jealous, will be a step forward for him. In the end, she’s just a crush not the love of his life. There are other people out there like he said. If they do decide to make him confess his love for her though, it would not make any sense for his personal journey. It would not help him grow as a person, because in the end she still would not have romantic feelings for him. So he’d probably get rejected and be forced to move on anyways. Also if the consequences for Lotura and Allura’s relationship is different, I honestly do not believe or hope that they don’t, write her character to turn around & jump ship to Lance if she gets her heart broken. I personally do not think they will make her character that way, because she’s had so many different love interests but so far she’s only found a connection with one. Her immediately falling in love with Lance if everything possibly falls apart with her and Lotor, would be poor writing in my opinion and be very cliche. Allura and Lance are both strong characters, and they deserve to be written as such in terms of their characteristics. Lance making the decision to put his crush on her behind him so that she can be happy and he can grow as well, will be a really amazing and important lesson for kids especially watching.

4. This is just my opinion on the parallels of those scenes and where I possibly think Lance’s storyline with Allura is going. Honestly all that I’ve written could be wrong, because we have no idea what’s going to happen in the future. But if you look at this from a realistic stand point, it just makes the most sense. I also don’t like seeing people downplay Allura and Lance’s relationship because it is very sweet, but at the same time to assume that they’re going to end up together just because Lance likes her alone is unrealistic. And people might think I’m being Klance biased or that I shouldn’t be assuming Allurance’s relationship if I don’t ship them. But you don’t have to be a shipper, to see the probable direction that this show is going in. All of the facts and info are right in our face, we just need to pay attention. The show paralleling those two scenes, is showing us something really important and it isn’t a reach to assume so. Not to mention, this is not the first time they’ve paralleled scenes in this context towards Keith and Lance. It isn’t an accident anymore, it never was, everything that they’re doing is intentional. 

[fairlywonderful]

GOT7 Fan-fic. Rec.

 So, since I’ve read like 80% of fics in the Got7 fandom, I though I’d do a fic rec, to help you (potential reader) and so that I finally can have a list of my favorite fics. These are not all the fics I’ve read, just the first ones that came to my mind. Also most of it consist of JJP, but I will add more pairings as I go! This list is not yet complete, I’m working on completing it, it just takes a lot of time to search for these fics. None of these fics are mine, all credits go to the amazing authors! The only things that are mine, are the little reviews after each fic! Good read! :)

M = Mature / Explicit W = Trigger Warning ♡ = fave

                                           !still under editing!

Jaebum / Jinyoung

* M - Anteroom by minhyukie

Summary: How do you act around your ex with your child in the other room? It’s been almost a year and a half, and Jinyoung has yet to figure it out.

Review: soooo goood!! It’s extremely angsty but its so worth it! The growth of the character is portrayed really well, the side characters are awesome and such an important part of everything, I loved it so much! Also kid!yugyeom is always a plus! ♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡

*M - Jaebum’s Color Theory by pepijr

Summary: Jinyoung is a film studies professor trying to get promoted and Jaebum does his best to help.

Review: Alright, in this one Jaebum is the cutest but dumbest human being. Like he’s really dense but it’s so on point and it’s so lovable it’s unreal. Everything is perfect about this one.♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡ 

*M - Meet The Parents by pepijr

Summary: Jinyoung loves Jaebum, and Jaebum loves him back, but a single note makes him question everything.

Review: It’s a continuation of Jaebum’s Color Theory, thank god the author has decided to bless us with more of this universe! It’s still ongoing but it’s just as good as the first one if not better! ♡♡♡♡♡♡

*M - The Park Family Recipe by pepijr

Summary: Jaebum and Jinyoung meet after six years with a lot more baggage than they remember.

Review: Another single dad!Jinyoung au (well kinda, Hyunjin is his little brother but he takes care of him). Jinyoung has a lot of problems but orphan!Jaebum is ready to fight for the family he choose. 

*M - bdsm quiz by okjb

Summary: jjp take a bdsm quiz and come to some interesting self-discoveries

Review: this one is pure smut lol

*M - Nora’s Dairies by pepijr

Summary: In which Nora makes sure that Jinyoung and Jaebum meet in every life.

Review: ♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡

*M - Take All Of Me by fishcake

Summary: It has bothered Jaebum since the day he could comprehend it.

Review: We need more omega!Jaebum in our life. ♡♡

* M - bloom by subsequence

Summary: Jaebum may have learned to accept his role as future king, but accepting this new role — the thought makes him sick to his stomach.If he could have, Jaebum would have chosen any other way to present as an omega.(Or: Omegaverse Arranged Marriage AU featuring Princes!JJP and a cast of loudmouth extras.)

Review: So good???? Like this one is right up my ally, I just fucking love everything about this one. Seriously, do yourself a favor and read it. ♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡

* M - Playboy by comingbacktoyou

Summary: Jaebum's intentions are obvious. Jinyoung doesn't get the hint.

Review: HOLY HOLY OH MY. Jaebum is a producer who's desperate for dick, Jinyoung is a new artist acting all prude bUT JUST WAIT FOR IT. Cute Markson in the bg. ♡♡♡♡♡♡♡

* M - The Tiger and the Duke by foxxing

Summary: Im Jaebum is the richest man in the country under forty, content to mess around and skirt the headlines as a cutthroat businessman and casual playboy. Park Jinyoung is a graduated English Literature major, content with (in Jackson's words) his boring life working at a restaurant and writing poetry. When their worlds collide over a spilled cup of coffee, Jinyoung learns there's a lot more to life than the secrets of his past and the safety of library books.

Review: This one is literally a JJP classic. Long af but sooo worth the read. The characters really just grow on you, even if they are dumb af sometimes :( also GREAT SMUT

* M - Wilder by Sugarbowl

Summary: Newly graduated, Jinyoung is determined to try new things. New parties, new boys, and when Mark asks for a favor, even volunteering as a counselor at summer camp. But new experiences can get complicated, and he quickly finds himself a little out of his depth.

Review: Another classic. I live for the sex scene in at the end. Jaebum is confused and doesn't know how to stand up for himself and Jinyoung is jealous af but also kind of insecure. But they make a great pair together :'). ALSO great smut (!), awesome Markson and cute af Yugbam plus a bunch of great Kpop cross overs (!!).

* M - Charade by Sugarbowl

Summary: Jaebum and Jinyoung walk parallel paths in many ways, but Jaebum isn't interested in their intersection. Jaebum struggles to support his young son on his own, while everything seems to come easy for wealthy, charming Jinyoung. But when they're forced to partner for a project, Jaebum finds himself a bit more willing, and much more in need.

Review: Another great fic by Sugarbowl. It's still ongoing but this fic is so beautiful. Both Jaebum's and Jinyoung's feelings are portrayed extremely well and the way they come together is beautiful. Plus kid!Yugyeom is adorable. ♡♡

* M - Citation by KingJackson

Summary: When the one book he needs for an important term paper has to remain in the campus library, Jinyoung catches the eye of Jaebum, a library assistant.

Review: Another classic. Jinyoung is dumb af in this fic, I literally was on the verge of screaming while reading this. But luckily Jaebum is soft af, so everything works out in the end :DD Great smut is always a plus! ♡

* M - Flux by foxxing

Summary: Jinyoung doesn't love him back.

an AU where jaebum and jinyoung have been best friends for their entire lives, and where jaebum has always been irrevocably in love with him but somehow, jinyoung just doesn't seem to get it.

Review: Another fic that makes me scream. LIKE SERIOUSlY WTF. My heart ached so much during this fic :( But as always everything works out but man, this was an emotional ride for me. ♡

* M - Compas Calling by Sugarbowl

Summary: Prince Jinyoung is destined for a lifetime of luxury, until he's shoved in a trunk and accidentally abducted. Im Jaebum clawed his way out of poverty to captain a pirate ship and... not much else, actually. Jinyoung could be his first real treasure, if Jaebum could just figure out how holding someone for ransom actually works.

Review: BEST FUCKING FIC OF THE CENTURY DO YOU HEAR ME I'VE RE-READ THIS ONE SO MANY TIMES IT'S THE BEST OMG ♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡

* M - A certain Romance by foxxing

Summary: By day, he's a top-rated babysitter. By weekends he's an x-rated escort. These things are generally kept separate, until the day his weekend regular gets his phone number by recommendation and calls for an emergency babysitter. The problem is that Jaebum doesn't know that Junior the escort is also Jinyoung the babysitter.

In which Jaebum and Jinyoung know each other in the biblical sense but maybe want to get to know each other, too.

Review: okay this fic is like really hot and kid!yugyeom is back at it with being adorable :')♡♡

* Unless by gotchick

Summary: jaebum had always been mark's best friend, while jinyoung was mark's kid brother. (high school au)

Review: Really cute au, the progress of growing up is portrayed well and realistically. (Spoiler! Honestly I live for the scene where JB throws a pillow on Jinyoung's surprise boner to save him :'DD )

* M - Wildcat by foxxing

Summary: No one really talks about it, but it's a well known secret that Jaebum’s real vice is racing cars. Dangerous and incredibly illegal, street racing is the one thing Jaebum is good at (besides being the nation’s first pain in the ass) and has never been caught for. How he does it, nobody knows: Jaebum's been caught for drugs, for stealing, for fighting, but it seems like the one thing the police can never pin him down for is the one thing he loves the most.

He represents everything that Jinyoung can't stand, and Jinyoung hates him.

Review: this is some A+++++ smut right here. ♡

* W - the grandfather paradox by symmetrophobic

Summary: Jaebum locks himself in a cyclic normalcy of work, home, life, and the two people he now loves most in the world- his husband Jinyoung and six-year-old son Yugyeom. So when a mysterious teenager shows up in his life and messes all that up, to say that he's just a little displeased by the change would be an understatement. But Jaebum soon discovers there's more to this quiet, truthful boy than meets the eye, and knows that he has just about four days to find out why.

Review: Amazing fic, but my heart hurts so bad :(((((((((

* M - Prove it by Got7hearts

Summary: For as long as he can remember Jaebum has always been there, protecting him and taking care of him like the big brother he never had so what happens when Jaebum is pronounced an alpha and Jinyoung an omega and the air between the two suddenly shifts.

Review: Great A/B/O fic and hot af smut!

* Of duchebags and pretty boys by schoetheisrealaf

Summary:  "Dear Dog Biscuit, Since you seem unable to understand the sign that clearly indicates that this parking space is to be exclusively used by the staff of this facility, I’ll kindly explain it to you again: Until you’re an employee of the state who works his ass off for society only to get shit wages and the worst working hours you CAN’T USE THIS PARKING LOT, SO FUCK OFF! Apart from that, have a nice day. PS.: I hope you don’t have sex for a year. :)"

OR

You steal my parking spot all the time and I was just heading out to leave a strongly worded note under your windshield wiper but oh no you're hot AU Starring Jinyoung the kindergarten teacher and Jaebum the (arrogant yet dorky) business man

Review: I JUST LOVE THIS FIC IT'S SO CUTE OK?!?♡♡♡♡♡♡

* M - lagoon by gotchick

Summary: in elegant terms, jaebum is jinyoung's sponsor. in inelegant terms, he's jinyoung's sugar daddy.

* M - Walls of Glass by hakka is_shadow, katamari

Summary: The city's social structure is firm and unyielding--Alphas at the top, Betas in the middle, and Omegas as pliant, broken servants to the Alphas. When Im Jaebum, the heir of an old Alpha family suddenly finds his social position flipped, he's thrown into a world of intrigue, deceit, and as the very unwilling servant to an even more unwilling Park Jinyoung.

Review: OK SO THIS IS LIKE ONE OF THE BEST WRITTEN FIC IN THIS FANDOM. LIKE THE UNIVERSE IS SO WELL MADE AND THE PROGRESS OF JJP RELATIONSHIP MAKES MY HEART SWELL UP WITH LOVE ♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡

* Come Soflty (to Me)  by Sugarbowl

Summary: Jinyoung is new in town, and Jaebum is trouble. 50's AU

* M - Spoor by maledict

Summary: It wasn’t odd, to present so late, but that wasn’t the problem.

Review: I don't like to read canon fics, but this one was a great one.

* an apple a day by moonlikeyou

Summary: Doctor Park Jinyoung, star of Seoul Medical Centre's paediatric department, is used to being treated by nothing less than starry-eyed adoration and respect. So, its no surprise that when Im Jaebum, a surgeon with maddeningly pretty twin moles, kicks him out of "his" operating room, Jinyoung gets a little mad.

Okay, maybe more than a little mad. But it's all Im Jaebum's fault anyway.

Review: DOCTOR!AU. CUTE CUTE CUTE CUTE ♡♡♡♡♡♡♡

* M - Taint Me by Got7hearts

Summary: Jinyoung is seventeen when he falls in love with Jaebum, who is eight years older than him.

Review: Jaebum with piercing. That's it. ♡♡

*M - This Christmas (I'll give you my heart) by schoetheisrealaf

Summary: Jaebum and Jinyoung have a fight at the supermarket in the morning. Jaebum and Jinyoung find out they're arranged to be married in the evening. Jaebum and Jinyoung fall in love, but only in time.

OR

Shouting match over the last Christmas goose at the grocery store AU

Review: This is super cute. Best while listening to Confession. :'3

* M - Smoke and Mirrors by hakkais_shadow

Summary: This was not the birthday present that Im Jaebum was expecting...

Review: Mafia au and hot af smut... ♡♡

* M - I Don't Fucking Care (At All) by wonwoozi

Summary: “Your boyfriend’s hot when he plays.” Jackson mumbles to him as he slips an arm behind Jinyoung, hand finding purchase on the edge of the wooden bartop, his fingers gripping the ribbed edge.

“He’s not my boyfriend.” Jinyoung replies instinctively and gives Jackson a routine jab to the ribs. “And that’s my line, by the way.” He adds as his eyes trail over to Mark, sat behind the drumkit with his face trained into a concentrated smirk, smashing every beat perfectly, hair positively dripping with sweat.

“Not my boyfriend either.”

* M - keep me warm by subsequence

Summary: The problem is that Jaebum...isn't a cat. At least, not entirely. God, sometimes Jinyoung wishes it were that easy, wishes he could just leave out a bowl of food and water and maybe get his laptop keyboard used as a napping spot when he was supposed to be working and have a simple owner-pet relationship.Instead, Jinyoung has a romantic entanglement bordering on codependency and the worst case of blue balls he’s ever had.And Mark had said that getting a cat hybrid would be good for his blood pressure. What a joke.

Review: Another amazing work from subsequence. Every time I read the part where Jaebum swats at Jinyoung’s dick, I just can't stop laughing. :’DD♡♡♡♡

*M - Human Nature by cutiepiemarkeu

Summary: Jaebum accidentally summons an incubus and his boyfriend Jinyoung walks in on the two of them almost getting their freak on. Arguments ensue and JJProject are stuck with an incubus they can’t get rid of - but how do they deal with his attractiveness and the overwhelming urge to have sex with him?

Review: This is a 3-some featuring Mark. But the smut is so good, honestly. Really worth the read. ♡♡♡♡♡

Mark / Jackson

* The Prince Who Never Laughed by seitsemannen

Summary: Once upon a time, in a kingdom far, far away, lived a beautiful and kind prince named Mark, who after his mother's loss never laughed again. That was until he met the brightly smiling apprentice of a glassblower, Jackson Wang.

Review: Such a great and quality fic! Honestly, this was such a good read I can only recommend it! ♡♡♡♡♡♡♡

* Twist by KingJackson

Summary: Mark knows Jinyoung. Jinyoung knows Jackson. Jackson hooks up with Jinyoung who also hooks up with Mark. Mark goes to hook up with Jinyoung and ends up also sleeping with Jackson. Jackson sometimes hooks up with Jaebum, but that isn’t important right now.

And they say romance is dead.

Review: All right so this fic is one hell of a mess, but a mess sent straight from heaven! The main pairing is Markson and Markjin (it's complicated) but there's end game Markson and JJP, plus Jackson is an angel sent from heaven in this one! Don't let the pairing discourage from reading this gem! ♡

* Private Show by Got7hearts

Summary: Mark likes to put on a show and Jackson loves to watch until he's been caught.

Review: A+ smut.

* M - lapis lazuli by gotchick

Summary: in which mark is a businessman and jackson is a fencer.

Review: great fic with rich kinda arrogant but kinda insecure mark plus lots of smut!

* M - Playhouse by seitsemannen

Summary: All sorts of rumours surround the handsome Wang heir and the good-looking servants of his household, but no one seemed to know for sure, as no matter the price, the members were not willing to give the secrets of their Master up.

Mark doesn't care for celebrities or rumours, except the one that says the Wang household pays several times more than the usual servant's salary, so when there's a job opening at the House, he goes for it. In the days and weeks spent at the House, Mark gets to know the members and finds out what of the ludicrous rumours were true and what weren’t. What he did not know to expect, however, is how good friends he would become with the other members of the House, and what’s worse, that he would fall in love with Jackson Wang.

Review: THE BEST. Multiple pairing but mostly Markson. Still ongoing but sooooo worth the read. also, long af. ♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡

* never felt clean, your timing was perfect by jflawless

Summary: i. jackson is five years old when he’s convinced he’s discovered the secret to love. it’s not much of a secret, he thinks, watching his parents exchange blatant “i love you”s only to quietly prove it later in subtle actions.

you like someone. you’re nice to them. they like you too. it’s the simplest thing he’ll ever do, he thinks, falling in love. a lot easier than tying his shoes or adding double digits or reading without his mom there to pronounce the really long words.

Jaebum / Jackson

* Just Smile Again by riots

Summary: Jackson's been lowkey nursing this crush for years, but he never meant for Jaebum to ever find out. Mark and Jinyoung have other ideas. Also, they're terrible friends.

* Face by jibootyjimin

Summary: @defsoul has started following @jiaerwang

--

(or an Instagram au in which famous Chinese rapper Jackson Wang acts like a complete fanboy over idol singer Im Jaebum)

Review: ♡♡

*Secret Little Rendezvous by seikou

Summary: "It's all fun and games until your favorite idol notices you."

(or: Im Jaebum is an Idol and Jackson Wang is a Fanboy.)

Review: ♡♡

* Fluffy Tales by wildandsexy

Summary: Jackson Wang’s Definitive List of Things Im Jaebum, Roommate, Cat Hybrid and Grump Extraordinaire Does and Does Not Like:

DOES LIKE: • Hoodies • The one table on the library’s second floor by the big window (direct sunlight all morning) (it’s basically heaven on Earth) • Nap time (usually at 11am) (and 12pm) (and 1pm) (and 2pm) (and 3pm)…

DOES NOT LIKE: • Waking up • Being awake in general • Not being asleep • Jackson Wang

Jackson Wang's new roommate doesn't even hate him. He 'nothings' him. And that's just something that Jackson can't live with.

Review: SO GOOD SO CUTE JAEBOM IS ADORABLE BUT GRUMPY AND JACKSON IS TRYING HIS BEST ♡♡♡♡♡♡

[korkrunchcereal]

WoW Q & A

We’ve seen more choices/player agency this expansion. How important is it to the team that these player agency choices happen for both factions, and how important to have repercussions?

Can only happen if there are repercussions. Not worth it otherwise. Have to be careful with the amount done and what’s chosen. Do I want to back the banshee queen or Saurfang? Interesting choice. Testing the waters with this.

METZEN! - When is the Horde getting its true Warchief back?

May be a job oppportunity coming up for a new Warchief. If so, we’ll call you.

20% auction fee hurting players. Did you have other ideas for it, and when will it be removed if so?

Only applies to select stackable trade goods. It’s a bandaid, would require a fundamental rework of the auction system. Limit to amount of population is collapse of the AH. Working on it.

Will the items in WoW classic be put in as tmog for the live WoW? For unobtainable items.

Important to keep the ecosystems separate. Separate the two completely. Playing classic BECAUSE you want to play classic.

Update on Class Relics?

Miiiight have jumped the gun. Tried to infuse it into a few systems since that time. Difficult to actually put in. Actively working on it. Prob see in heritage armor / individual armor as opposed to wholesale solution.

Character progression, specifically leveling not rewarding. Wouldn’t it be better to implement a level squish? More rewarding feeling.

Not satisfied with what lvling has turned into. A level squish is a big ordeal, and some psychological concern. Agreed that something needs to change. It’s not attainable to keep upping level without adding reward behind it.

What steps to address toxicity in public chat channels?

Values: Everyone have a good time. Better to lose the negative person then the group they’re affecting. Listen to reports, not always good at telling you they are. Lot of behind of scenes work to investigate. Going to be instituting technology in other blizz games to handle such. Much more thoughtful and better, but active.

Why is there so much RNG in the game, and do you have plans to move away from the amount of RNG? 

A concern heard often. Completely deterministic. Had to get a drop, and grind certain emblems/badges in the past. Could mark on a calendar when you get pieces. No excitement or reward on the way. Not the world they want to do, but the flipside is nothing is predictable/certain. Been part of WoW. Putting in small fixes, but swung too far in pure randomness. Working towards a middle ground. 

Smart loot system on mythic caches?

Def. randomness feeling there. A fix for azerite system was on M+ system. Would be great to have streak breaking protection, not so much bad luck support. Example: You get boots, don’t get another pair.

Information on future of Azerite gear? How does team see azerite gear improving and evolving?

Tides of Vengeance gets improvements rolled out. Multiple choices in outer rings of azerite. 3x as many pieces of gear that has trait you want. Continue to add new traits, replacing lack luster ones. Continue to do that through BfA. Beyond ToV, looking at ways to improve system. More depth and choices in Heart of Azeroth similar to artifact weapons.

Are you going to pull more things off of GCD?

Looking at offensive CDs, example of monks having around 10 abilities off the GCD. Pulled way way back, took feedback and put things back off GCD. ToV, ignore pain off GCD. Pretty satisfied with offensive CD of it. Don’t think taking off GCD fixes issues of needing to press 3 buttons to deal dmg. Reduce the buttons / need to push that many. Movement is big focus. Taking Movement abilities off GCD in ToV.

Color wheel/dye?

Comes up frequently. Big answer: Not for everything existing. Tinting contradicts how blizzard paints its armor. Very similar to oil painting. Going back to do everything would have to change all colors to grey, then doing color shifting. BC tried tinting, “clown era”. System would have to be isolated; one armor system so they can hand craft each color.

 Took off niche abilities over time. If it resulted in homogenization of abilities, would you go back to MoP style?

Look at those abilities separately. Not averse to adding abilities where it makes sense. Mist and WoD abilities/talents were just used to shore up weaknesses. Would rather focus on strengths and give class identity. Feeling of “Man im glad we have an X” instead of “one of 6 specs to fill a hole.”

With CRZ and phasing off for classic WoW, how will you handle servers in classic with low pop realms / caps?

Not always seeing each other in the classic beta. Sharding at the moment, but demo is every char in the exact point in the world so without sharding would be broken. Some casual players, some hardcore. Concern is what will it do to realm communities, especially as realm populations fall over time? Using sharding in very limited ways. Understands its antithesis of classic, but necessary. First few weeks, plan to use limited sharding to beat initial launch problems. Further on, healthy population and single world.

Mechagon announced. Goblins and Gnomes; any development of background of Gallywix. How has being part of the larger horde affected him as a leader? Is he just a 2 dimensional money grubbing character? Any development of Gallywix and his attachment to his people?

3 dimensional money grubbing character. When pleasure palace can become pleasure palace, really experience goblins as they are meant to be; skyscrapers etc. Until then, we’ll look into it. 

If we’re getting Azshara, will we get the cannon?

We’re gonna fire that cannon.

Can tmog restrictions be lifted / more freedom?

Kind of a one way street at the moment. Loosening some restrictions, notably heritage armor. Heritage armor the example. Tides of Vengeance: Can tmog over fist weapons with 1 handed. Can’t fix wands, wands are weird. 

Differentiating between Sylvanas and Garrosh?

Stories not done. Much left to discover and explore. If I was Sylvanas and looking at Garrosh, i’d say Garrosh is an amateur. 

Set up as Horde vs. Alliance. Warfronts, Island expeditions. Why if we’re in either one, are PvP talents not activated?

Because you’re not fighting other players.

Announcement of BG’s with island AI. Will PvP talents activate then?

Not sure. Probably turn on talents because PvP brawl. AI is literal reconstruction of players; frost mage using actual player abilities. 

Do you encourage island expeditions to level?

yes. Buffed exp. Account bound unlock flight path item in Tides of Vengeance.

Will there be revamped M+ keystone leaderboard?

Sort of. Leaderboard still functions as a leaderboard. Challenge is only window of character progression. By Tides of Vengeance, add to the armory profile to see best times of week/season. 

Low performing specs get bad reputation that persists long after buff. Anything to buff shamans, spriests and ferals?

Yes. If you keep getting turned down, you don’t have fun and you’re justified in blaming blizzard. Have to overbuff sometimes to get them better attention. 

Any plans/considerations to bring back tier sets/gear related to give definition of class identity?

Trying something different in BfA. Gives a chance to get a set of gear that feels like that raid; naga raid give naga aesthetic gear. Class themed armor sets prob come back in the future. For now, cool to see varying designs. 

Classic: Staying on patch forever, or eventually get its expansions?

Right now, focus on restoring classic WoW. Once it’s out next summer, go from there. 

[dreamingnaturaljelly]

Trigun 6 - 9

I wanted to watch more eps but I'm very tired so these four will do!

episode 6:

- oh hey this ep actually takes off where the previous one left off i like that. Heck yeah

- i like the style, and sometimes the art gets kinda rough which is fine in that "the action scenes look pretty so this is acceptable budget balance"-way,  but sometimes the faces are so thin it's kinda terrifying?? 

- a SANDSTEAMBOAT WHAT THE HECK YES

- Vash angst? 

- Elizabeth's design is the first one i dislike BUT since she's a shady lady i will accept it. Like boobs out is not a look for an engineer, but it's a look for someone trying to mislead someone else. I just don't think that kind of design ever really looks nice... I can't list examples from the top of my head, but I feel like I've seen similar designs - They're always supposed to be pretty dresses but then they get designed by people who have zero sensibility for what a pretty dress actually _is_? Like slapping on some ribbons isn't instantly gonna make it look good. IM SORRY THIS IS SUCH AN ANIME PET PEEVE OF MINE

- Wait meryl's twenty, does that mean Millie's like eighteen??

- WAIT IF ELIZABETH WAS THREE WHEN THIS HAPPENED THEN HOW FUCKING OLD IS VASH

- (Seriously though Vash Angst, Im ready)

episode 7: - I really don't know what this story is doing in this scene with these sex workers. Like they're treated nicely and the person who hired them for Vash is talking to them like normal people and it's a rather unsexy convo which I really like. I just don't understand why Vash, who takes 0.01 seconds to be attracted to cute women usually, pretends to be asleep. Like it'd make sense if he was in love with someone and the narrative wanted to be all "oh no i can't cheat on this person i like" or it makes sense if it was all slutshamey and it wanted to be all "oh no gross women can't sleep with many people for MONEy no no i can't participate in that" but it's ..... none of those things. It's funny because the entire show is about Vash doing dumb shit nobody gets, and I trip over this one scene where for once that isn't the point ahhaha.

- Vash adopting this random stray kid though?? a good boy

- Who the fuck is this neon jojo man

- i do love a good shounen protag who cries a lot, like ngl, my favourite thing about shounen stuff is that boys cry a lot in them.

- WAIT THIS IS A CLIFFHANGER I 

episode 8: - Vash you look like Chiyo's dad and i hate/love it as is always the case when Chiyo's dad is involved.

- Vash i appreciate your values but please don't just walk around when someone shot you

- IM WORRIED ABOUT MILLY AND MERYL WHERE ARE THEY

- OHSDJKHSDF OH THERE THEY ARE, literally during the same scene as i wrote the previous comment they return and i should not have worried bc they're Goood.

- everyone's celebrating but that one dude who was operating this ship is still dead like uhh - oh well i guess it doesn't matter if you can't steer the ship!! - oh oops i guesss it does, idk about this weird streak of predictions on my part

- THIS IS THE LEAST CONVENIENTLY PLACED EMERGENCY BRAKE I HAVE EVER SEEN, like i get not wanting guests to use them but behind searing hot pipes is Perhaps too much.

episode 9: - Millie YOU'RE AMAZING but how do you two not have money for the bus

- Also im the bg character who needed to pee very badly

- THANKFULLY THERE WAS STILL PLACE ON THE ROOF OF THE BUS FOR THIS GIANT CROSS I BROUGHT. 

- I LOVE THIS NEW GUY'S NOSE - I DONT THINK THAT TINY CHURCH REALLY PROVIDES EVERYTHING YOU NEED OUT OF A CONFESSIONAL BUT UH

- well i guess Vash and Wolfwood are now forever friends since Wolfwood just did a nice thing for kids. 

- DRAMATIC ASSHOLES THROWING THEMSELVES INTO THE DESERT TO FACE GIANT ROBOTS IN ORDER TO SAVE A CHILD, now that's the good content

- I will say this ship is already approx as good as Millie/Meryl so im excited. 

- this action priest is a disaster

- I also know Wolfwood’s VA .......... aaaaaand oh boy we got Aizen and Muraki now that's about as bad as it gets and we will ban this info from my brain right now.

- There's something i always really like about religion surviving the apocalypse. Like in this case of Christianity, you have the concept of the rapture right? And I really like the idea where like if the world ended and you could assume you got left behind by your god, you won't just abandon your faith like that. Regardless of which faith that is. 

- Wolfwood I will commend you on your good taste but please do not use Millie as a pillow to sleep against WITHOUT ASKING

Okay though what I ideally wanted was something of an overarching storyline and what i got was not only angsty implications of exactly that, but also a story that took up two eps & continuity in where we're actually at, so I'm pleased. 

[minyoongijjangjjangmanboongboong]

Quick enterance here I love the chapter. For my taste it was so short. I try to look under to read more. Sad hours for fangirls. Ahem. From start. Jungkook was... he was really easy to get huh? One seductive look and his in. I wouldnt expect that from him but his in golden ages I suppose haha. In the work scene I was ready to fight because its so accurate! So many women faces out justice in work because they are simply women and it would turn out worse if it wouldnt be a story. Very realistic+

+ and it boils my blood. If it would be a man none of it would be a problem. And its very hard to catch up with life too. Just be understanding of your very humble employee you boss. AND TAE.... My baby. He is so creepy but cute. To be honest if I feel some stanger touch my head when I sleep I would go crazy. But its a story and he is ultra cute. Sorry Jk but you have to stay in corner in thi story too. He win. Like last time. I'm glad that she know. +

+ I hope wont turn out a misunderstanding. It would break my heart. I wonder in next chapter will we get a confrontation. I liv for those moments. Anyway great work of yours again. Love you and take care. -anonIhvsmchtsy Ps. Dont quit writing the story please please please.. (and I hop you doing okay. I forget asking all the time)

Ahhhh it was short for my taste too! Normally I have a few extra days to get the chapter to my preferred length (about 8k), but this week I couldn’t :’( Huhuhu I’m telling you guys Jungkook isn’t as tough as he seems! He may look/act like a macho, strong man but I’m not so sure that’s who he really is!

Oof, and I agree. I hate things like that. I was lucky to work in an environment where my boss allowed me to wear whatever I felt comfortable wearing, but for a lot of women that’s just not the case. It’s a real shame, and I think it highlights a huge problem in our culture of placing the responsibility for how other people feel onto women. Like it’s our job to make sure men aren’t uncomfortable, or it’s our job not to be ‘tempting’. Which is garbage, considering it’s a million times easier and healthier to simply teach kids not to sexualize the human form outside of intimate situations. Idgi lol, but maybe I’m just ranting at this point.

God, exactly! You see it a lot in kpop with GGs versus BGs. Boy groups can wear next to nothing and it’s completely acceptable, but girl groups do ONE edgy choreo and they’re branded sluts forever. It’s unacceptable. You can’t simultaneously infantilize and over-sexualize women. Either we’re too naive to make our own decisions or we’re too dangerous and provocative to wear what we like without incurring the male gaze. I’M GONNA STOP NOW BECAUSE HONESTLY I COULD GO ON FOREVER OOF.

N E WAYS haha yes I agree! Tae needs to figure out what to do without making a mistake. This is a pivotal moment for him, and whatever he decides to do with completely affect the way his relationship with our main character progresses. Hopefully he’s smart and makes a good choice that won’t further damage her trust. We shall see~

Haha and please don’t worry! I only considered stopping work on the story because Tumblr may have glitched and for the first hour and a half or so the update had zero notes. I was worried people had lost interest in the story, so I briefly considered halting it, but everything worked out and people are still engaged! So long as I have anyone reading the story, I’ll continue it haha. No worries! And I’m doing so well! Thank you, my dear. I hope the same goes for you!

[qveenofthorns]

Brave, gentle, strong: there is only one (no really—I checked)

“When you’re old enough, I will make you a match with a high lord who’s worthy of you, someone brave and gentle and strong.” – Eddard Stark, Sansa III, AGOT

I’ve seen a lot of metas about textual evidence for Sandor being the BGS That Was Promised™, and I started wondering if there are any other candidates. What if we’re all so ~blinded~ by our ship that we missed something else right in front of us? I used A Search of Ice and Fire to check every single Sansa/Alayne chapter for these words (and variations of them) to see if she thinks of anyone else using all of these terms.  

Here are all of the of the uses sorted by character/chronologically (excluding the times she tells Sweetrobin that he’s brave and strong or she tells herself to be brave like Robb):

Joffrey

1. “It was a great honor to ride with the queen, and besides, Prince Joffrey might be there. Her betrothed. Just thinking it made her feel a strange fluttering inside, even though they were not to marry for years and years. Sansa did not really know Joffrey yet, but she was already in love with him. He was all she ever dreamt her prince should be, tall and handsome and strong, with hair like gold.” Sansa I, AGOT

Okay, so I think we can discount this one given the context of Ned’s “brave and gentle and strong” quote, but I really wanted to cover all the bases. It’s also a pretty superficial assessment, moulding him to fit the part in which she’s cast him based on the songs.

Barristan Selmy

1. “One knight wore an intricate suit of white enameled scales, brilliant as a field of new-fallen snow, with silver chasings and clasps that glittered in the sun. When he removed his helm, Sansa saw that he was an old man with hair as pale as his armor, yet he seemed strong and graceful for all that. From his shoulders hung the pure white cloak of the Kingsguard.” Sansa I, AGOT

This one is also an extremely obvious no, though it is still interesting. Despite being old, he seems like a knight from the songs and we see the Kingsguard cloak for the first time in a Sansa POV.  

Sandor

1. “She stepped backward and bumped into someone. Strong hands grasped her by the shoulders, and for a moment Sansa thought it was her father, but when she turned, it was the burned face of Sandor Clegane looking down at her, his mouth twisted in a terrible mockery of a smile.” Sansa I, AGOT

This is after she first sees Ser Ilyn Payne, whom she finds terrifying. Her initial response to Sandor’s touch is positive and this won’t be the last time she backs into him when she’s afraid.

2. “Sandor Clegane scooped her up around the waist and lifted her off the featherbed as she struggled feebly. Her blanket fell to the floor. Underneath she only had a thin bed gown to cover her nakedness. ‘Do as you’re bid, child,’ Clegane said. ‘Dress.’ He pushed her toward her wardrobe, almost gently.” Sansa VI, AGOT

This is the first BGS occurrence since her conversation with Ned. She’s depressed and suicidal and hasn’t bathed in who-knows-how-long after his death. Joffrey has demanded she get dressed and bathe or else “his Hound” will do it for her. She still asks that Joff leave her alone and doesn’t move, at which point he orders Sandor to get her out of bed.

3. “‘Here, girl.’ Sandor Clegane knelt before her, between her and Joffrey. With a delicacy surprising in such a big man, he dabbed at the blood welling from her broken lip.” Sansa VI, AGOT

Not only is he being gentle with her here, he also just prevented her from committing a murder/suicide.

4. “‘True knights,’ he mocked. ‘And I’m no lord, no more than I’m a knight. Do I need to beat that into you?’ Clegane reeled and almost fell. ‘Gods,’ he swore, ‘too much wine. Do you like wine, little bird? True wine? A flagon of sour red, dark as blood, all a man needs. Or a woman.’ He laughed, shook his head. ‘Drunk as a dog, damn me. You come now. Back to your cage, little bird. I’ll take you there. Keep you safe for the king.’ The Hound gave her a push, oddly gentle, and followed her down the steps. By the time they reached the bottom, he had lapsed into a brooding silence, as if he had forgotten she was there.” Sansa II, ACOK

The serpentine encounter is the perfect example of the walking, talking dichotomy that is Sandor Clegane. “Iron fingers” catch her wrist and prevent her from falling down the steps and he makes a joke about how she’s trying to kill them both (something to consider for the future, Sandor: you’re the one lurching out of hidden doorways in the middle of the night, so maybe that’s part of the problem). She says he’s hurting her but he doesn’t let go of her wrist. Then he makes some inappropriate comments about her body and asks her to sing him a song about knights and fair maidens (because he’s a closet sappy romantic like that) because she likes knights. She says she likes true knights and then we come in at the quote. So we go from scary drunk who’s holding her wrist too tight and coming on to her sexually (the only time he ever does) to immediately realizing he’s way out of line, going back to gentle touches and promises to keep her safe. He also lies to protect her from Boros Blount on the very next page. I think it’s fairly safe to say his brooding is primarily about two things: kicking himself over how he just acted, and the “keep you safe for the king” part (he knows Joff well enough to realize that the king is the biggest threat to her safety). In a Daenerys ACOK chapter, she says of Jorah, “Sometimes he thinks of me as a child he must protect, and sometimes as a woman he would like to bed….” I reread that chapter the other day and couldn’t help but think of SanSan and this scene in particular.  

5. “The Hound pulled her to her feet, not ungently.” Sansa III, ACOK

This is at the beginning of the scene where she’s beaten and stripped by Boros Blount. While he’s gentle with her in that moment and does tell Joffrey to stop later, his inaction on this occasion is the biggest regret of his life and he cries about it on his “deathbed.”

6. “A stab went through her, so sharp that Sansa sobbed and clutched at her belly. She might have fallen, but a shadow moved suddenly, and strong fingers grabbed her arm and steadied her.” Sansa IV, ACOK

Okay, so I’m kind of convinced that Sandor spends all of his free time stalking her (because he doesn’t know how to handle the fact that he has positive feelings for another human being?). He’s always lurking in shadows, only to pop out to save her from falling. How often does he hide in the shadows near her that we just never see?

7. “She made herself look at that face now, really look. It was only courteous, and a lady must never forget her courtesies. The scars were not the worst part, nor even the way his mouth twitches. It’s his eyes. She had never seen eyes so full of anger. ‘I… I should have come to you after,’ she said haltingly. ‘To thank you, for… for saving me… you were so brave.’” Sansa IV, ACOK

Ugh, I just have so many feels about this interaction. Between these two quotes, Sandor bb gets sad because she’s scared of him and “still can’t bear to look,” so he lashes out. “He is a dog, just as he says. A half-wild, mean-tempered dog that bites any hand that tries to pet him, and yet will savage any man who tries to hurt his master.” Yes, because he is an ABUSED dog and no one has every tried to pet him before so he’s getting very confused. I’m getting side-tracked by the feels so I’ll stop myself here.

8. “Of late Ser Osmund had taken Sandor Clegane’s place by Joffrey’s side, and Sansa had heard the women at the washing well saying that he was as strong as the Hound, only younger and faster. If that was so, she wondered why she had never once heard of these Kettleblacks before Ser Osmund was named to the Kingsguard.” Sansa VI, ACOK

I considered also including this under the Kettleblacks, but decided against it because she’s not the one saying they’re strong. Her attitude here feels similar to her attitude during the first unkiss mention (“these other girls/women are so silly—I have the Hound and what they have is inferior”).

9. “He yanked her closer, and for a moment she thought he meant to kiss her. He was too strong to fight. She closed her eyes, wanting it to be over, but nothing happened.” Sansa VII, ACOK

This one typically gets left out because it doesn’t exactly portray him in a positive light, but I’m trying to include everything, good and bad. I have some thoughts on this re: the unkiss, but this isn’t the place for that. Short version: it would have been very easy for GRRM to write something like “she wished he wouldn’t,” but instead he wrote “wanting it to be over.” I’m not saying she wanted him to kiss her in that moment, but she didn’t not want him to kiss her either (or it could be a “just get it over with” scenario).

Tyrion

1. “Sansa watched him walk off, his body swaying heavily from side to side, like something from a grotesquerie. He speaks more gently than Joffrey, she thought, but the queen spoke to me gently too. He’s still a Lannister, her brother and Joff’s uncle, and no friend. Once she had loved Prince Joffrey with all her heart, and admired and trusted his mother, the queen. They had repaid that love and trust with her father’s head. Sansa would never make that mistake again.” Sansa I, ACOK

“More gently than Joffrey” is a pretty low bar. Overall, not a very glowing review of Tyrion: he’s not a monster, but he’s grotesque, can’t be trusted, and could turn into a monster later.

Osmund Kettleblack

1. “Sansa tried to run, but Cersei’s handmaiden caught her before she’d gone a yard. Ser Meryn Trant gave her a look that made her cringe, but Kettleblack touched her almost gently and said, “Do as you’re told, sweetling, it won’t be so bad. Wolves are supposed to be brave, aren’t they?” Sansa III, ASOS  

If you didn’t have déjà vu while reading this, something is wrong because this is almost EXACTLY the same as a Sandor moment included on this list. (“‘Do as you’re bid, child,’ Clegane said. ‘Dress.’ He pushed her toward her wardrobe, almost gently.”) HOWEVER, I don’t think Sandor would have been so chill in this particular situation. This is as she’s being dragged off to marry Tyrion and seeing as finding out Sansa had married Tyrion made Sandor suicidal, well, that’s a thought for another day. Between this and Sandor #8, I feel like there’s potential for a SanSan meta solely comparing Sandor and the Kettleblacks. (Someone else please write that—I’m only even doing this because I have mild writer’s block on a fic and needed a break.)

Ser Dontos

1. “‘Not far.’ Ser Dontos took her hand in his own and rubbed it gently. “Your friend is near, waiting for you.’” Sansa V, ASOS

This is while she and Dontos are escaping after Joffrey’s murder. It’s mentioned that they take the serpentine steps at one point. See Sandor #4 for another important interaction there.

Petyr Baelish

1. “He saved Alayne, his daughter, a voice within her whispered. But she was Sansa too… and sometimes it seemed to her that the Lord Protector was two people as well. He was Petyr, her protector, warm and funny and gentle… but he was also Littlefinger, the lord she’d known at King’s Landing, smiling slyly and stroking his beard as he whispered in Queen Cersei’s ear. And Littlefinger was no friend of hers. When Joff had her beaten, the Imp defended her, not Littlefinger. When the mob sought to rape her, the Hound carried her to safety, not Littlefinger. When the Lannisters we’d her to Tyrion against her will, Ser Garlan the Gallant gave her comfort, not Littlefinger. Littlefinger never lifted so much as his little finger for her.” Sansa I, AFFC

Wow, so there’s a lot to unpack here but most of it isn’t relevant to this post. However, this is one of the many times she compares Sandor favorably to other men.

2. “‘Forgive her, my lords,’ Petyr Baelish said softly. ‘She still has nightmares of that day. Small wonder if she cannot bear to speak of it.’ He came up behind her and put his hands gently on her shoulders. ‘I know how hard this is for you, Alayne, but our friends must hear the truth.’ Her throat felt so dry and tight it almost hurt to speak.” Sansa I, AFFC

I see two SanSan parallels in this brief passage. Putting his hands on her shoulders from behind reminds me of her first interaction with Sandor and her throat hasn’t been “dry and tight” since the Blackwater. All of the language in the Blackwater scene is highly sexual, but here, those are the only words that stand out and I only noticed them because they’ve been used before.

Lothor Brune

1. “Sober, he was a quiet man, but a strong one. And Petyr says he’s loyal.” Alayne II, AFFC

The only thing I’ll say about Lothor is that Sansa also compares him to Sandor/he triggers memories about Sandor (ex: the incident with Marillion where she thinks it might be the Hound saving her for a moment before she realizes that’s impossible).

Here’s a chart for the visual learners

Conclusion: Sandor is the only man worthy of Sansa, as per her father’s parameters

While, just like Sansa, “I knew the Hound would win,” I didn’t expect the results to be this conclusive. He hits all three points while no one else scores above a two. SANDOR BB IS THE ONLY ONE WHO MEETS MORE THAN ONE CRITERIA. SHE NEVER DESCRIBES ANOTHER MAN AS BRAVE. NOT ONCE. ONLY HIM. She talks about brave men in general, but he is the only specific man she ever calls brave.* And it’s not internal monologue like all of the other instances I’ve outlined—she’s saying it aloud, thanking him to his face. And it’s also worth noting that several of the occasions she describes another man as gentle or strong are callbacks to interactions with Sandor. Knowing GRRM, there’s no way that’s an accident. So SanSan is endgame or GRRM is the world’s biggest troll. Either way, my heart hurts.

*While bravery only shows up once in this analysis, Sansa does frequently describe women (herself included) as being brave and also reminds herself to be brave a lot (that whole weird thing where GRRM writes female characters like actual people instead of accessories to the men in their lives).