#i seriously didn't do that on purpose
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31 Days of Horror Recs: @docholligay's prompt from, like, 3 years ago for Inside No 9 episodes I think she'd like
(Sorry about how long it took. >.<)
Quick note for non-Doc people: Inside No 9 is an anthology series. They largely stay in the realm of horror, comedy (both regular and dark), drama, and some really Fucked Up Shit. These and the very first episode of the whole series are, imo, the best of the whole series. There are plenty of other not-great-but-still-really-good episodes too, if you want to check out the whole thing.
Note that due to show's penchant for twists, I won't be writing any of my own thoughts down; I'm just going to put the episode title, season, and number down as well as a brief synopsis and leave y'all to it.
Doc, I watched these specifically with you in mind so I hope that even if you don't like them, you'll at least find them interesting.
The 12 Days of Christine (season 2, episode 2)
When Christine brings a man home from a costume party, her life begins to unravel.
The Devil of Christmas (season 3, episode 1)
A director's commentary of a movie he made about a family vacationing at an alpine chalet where they are told of the local legend of Krampus.
Zanzibar (season 4, episode 1)
Strangely farcical goings-on are in store for a group of unwitting guests who all have adjoining rooms. Done entirely in iambic pentameter.
Loves Great Adventure (season 5, episode 3)
Trevor and Julia always want to make Christmas really special for their family but, with money tight, it won't be easy.
#geeky talks#31 days of horror recs#geeky talks horror#so i somehow didn't realize until this write up that 3/4th of the recs deal with christmas in some way or another#i seriously didn't do that on purpose#apparently they just do really good christmas eps who knew not me until right this moment apparently#also think it's hilarious that out of the eps i'd recommend#3/5 of them are the first eps of seasons#they really frontloaded their seasons with the best eps in the beginning huh?#there are in total 9 seasons (55 eps in total)#unfortunately although i did really enjoy the series overall#if you're going to say only pick the best of the best#i didn't find any eps i'd describe that way after season 5#still a great series and if you like some weird shit this is definitely a show worth checking out
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things unsaid
#as much as it pains me to gif him i just had this idea#and i think he purposely didn't say it out loud bc it's not his thing to tell#even if he knows#because i don't think buck would /get/ it if he just was accused by tommy to be in love with eddie#like he needs to realise it on his own#that's why maddie doesn't tell him out right either#even if buck would take maddie's words more seriously#also buck POURS himself into his relationships and forgets about his own needs#and eddie... honey... he needs to understand that he also deserve to have something for HIM too and not just for chris#and with buck he has both#and if they just open their eyes and see what they've already got#they can NOT have other people interfere#because if they do they might make mistakes and might work against it#like yeah they have had nudges before like the christmas elf scene and maddie asking about his boy crush but this was /before/#like.. it's like this. they haven't been ready for it until now. but when they figure it out... they will realise it's been there all along#growing#so even if it's been there all along they had to grow with it#you get me?#sorry it got long but i also had to bury my temu tag somewhere down deep#buddie#tommy kinard#911#911edit#911 abc#911 fox#mine: gif#mine
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Me, foolishly: Oh man, I should join a pro-endo server, maybe I got the wrong idea about endos and maybe they're actually decent!
Days of bullshit about headspaces being "automatically there" and "not created", people acting like the headspace is a real place, people praising "tulpamancers" for being "so helpful and intelligent and amazing" (eugh) and a wide variety of other nonsense later: Ah.
-Xero
#Staying in it for research purposes#seriously what in the world are endos doing#the only thing that was helpful in this server was something about psi vampires#which I didn't know was a thing that's sick as fuck actually and I think we might be one#anti endo#osdd system#syspunk#systempunk#syscourse#osdd#system#traumagenic system#osddid#actual system
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#the twitter girlies are mad that people are pointing out that a huge aspect of armand/lestat is that lestat looks like marius#'reducing armand's relationship to lestat like that is an injustice to his character' is it though??#because it's true#not only do lestat and marius look alike#but they exude the specific kind of energy that has heads turning that has people wanting to listen to them that has people listening to th#*them#and lestat getting armand out of the children of darkness cult#(even if he didn't actually give a fuck about getting armand specifically out)#is completely reminiscent to armand of marius 'rescuing' him from the brothels#and teaching him philosophies of life and how to live and introducing him to purpose and meaning#the difference is that marius wanted armand and had him#and lestat clocks armand so fast and is like 'absolutely not'#and not only absolutely not but acknowledges that whatever darkness resides in armand would kill lestat with its horror and depth#and this is why i can't take anyone seriously#people comparing louis to marius (not remotely similar in ANY aspect)#people that think armand's love for lestat isn't more of a trauma response than anything else#and frankly this is why i do not believe whatsoever that armand and lestat hooked up in the show world#because lestat will not would not could not#and that's a huge part of lestat's character tbh#and a huge thing that DOES separate him from marius
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unfortunately i will not be explainign this either
good luck following along, numbering the parts barely helped lol (also my handwriting is a disaster)
#i have a habit of simultaneously taking my art very seriously and not seriously at all#the result is nonsense like this#does. does anyone wanna guess what i had caspar class as ultimately in my second run (and will in my third)#definitely not a class that uses axes/brawling but can also heal#and definitely not for the sole purpose of healing almost exclusively one other certain unit#PRETEND I SPELLED VULNERARIES CORRECTLY LOL#also pretend i remembered the name of healing magic-using classes and didn't just generalize under “healers”...#i do like to think caspar would carry linhardt around like a football#caspar von bergliez#linhardt von hevring#tw blood#cw blood#tw injury#while most of this reflects my second run (AM)#i will say byleth having the all healing items happened more in my first run (CF)#actually that's not quite accurate either - the one who always had healing items was hubert bECAUSE THAT MAN HAS NO HP AND NO DEFENSE.#in all that rambling i nearly forgot to tag the game itself!#fe:3h
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; " asking for consent ruins the moment though !! " cool cool but what if I shoved a condom so far up your ass you abort yourself. Then what. Does consent ruin the moment still or did I reach your brain.
#if when you're reborn you're still that fucked up and uncreative CLEARLY I didn't shove it far enough#consent#consent is sexy#cw graphic#kinda ??#Idk I don't want to not tag this and then like it triggers someone and such ..#better safe than sorry#text post#random thought#abortion tw#I don't know if that's ?? smth I should tag ??#I'm overthinking this#but still.#This js came to me in a vision basically and I had to post so#what better place than Tumblr#am i right#!??#consent is everything#seriously#and not js w sex#but also w sex#also I'm aware this is not how condoms work#please do not shove them up there my stars like#this is not for educational purposes#it's figurative#( is that the word ?? ☹️ )#cw threats#not to anyone here#hopefully.
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25.10.2024, this afternoon, evening, I am recording Seriously And Happily.(Happing~,Happing~!!!!)
25.10.2024, this afternoon, evening, I am recording Seriously And Happily.(Happing~,Happing~!!!!) Seeing that I doing many houseworks, my dad and mom prepared dinner in advance(Today I did houseworks very busy,Just supplied some sleeping,Today I didn't preparing the dinner…………), which is Very Delicious, Very Touching, and Very Happy!!!! While I am recording, I eat dinner……………… So that recording slowly.I am not on purpose!!!!!! Now, I continue to record seriously and happily (repost,Sharing the happinesses…………Meow~………………)………………Happy Happy!!!!!!!!!!
Bangjia Zheng
25.10.2024 20.05
#25.10.2024#this afternoon#evening#I am recording Seriously And Happily.(Happing~Happing~!!!!)#Seeing that I doing many houseworks#my dad and mom prepared dinner in advance(Today I did houseworks very busy Just supplied some sleeping Today I didn't preparing the dinner…#which is Very Delicious#Very Touching#and Very Happy!!!!#While I am recording#I eat dinner……………… So that recording slowly.I am not on purpose!!!!!!#Now#I continue to record seriously and happily (repost#Sharing#the happinesses…………Meow~………………)………………Happy Happy!!!!!!!!!!#Bangjia Zheng#25.10.2024 20.05
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I think one character archetype I like is Really Cool Elite Smug Asshole Antihero Scheming Guy, except I look at them and go (if they aren't already in canon) "what if he was a clown. what if he had terrible judgment and impulse control and very little intrapersonal intelligence. what if he was constantly stepping on rakes and then being upset and confused that rake handles keep hitting him in the face."
I think this is what Yonemura felt like when writing for Sasword after his intro eps
#now that i've identified this pattern. i need to look for more women like this#if a character is a jerk sometimes i like to think. what if everyone just got sick of their bullshit and didn't take them seriously#(in a getting dunked on constantly sense and/or in a pitying way depending on how much it seems like they're doing it on purpose)#and they had to get over themselves or die of humiliation
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a bit obsessed with the idea of kusakabe dying as a form of sacrifice to specifically protect/save somebody else. it's consistent enough with the theme of the past generation achieving no meaningful feats against significant threats but it's also ironic enough that someone without a technique and who claims their philosophy is primarily self-sacrificial - although he tends to stay from his own ideals in critical moments, proving he's not only brave when necessary but he does have a sense of responsabilty and guilt - ultimately redeems themselves through death resulting in the achievement of something his colleagues have failed to do. not that i'm wishing for him to die, i hope he doesn't. but it would also make a clear-cut distinction between him and a character like mei mei, who narratively serves a very similar purpose (besides her being a foil to nanami). to have someone be awarded by their selfishness just for it to not be worth much within a world and system that runs and sustains itself due to the sorcerer's labour power, whose only means of subsistence is to sell themselves away. a class of people who is doomed no matter what path they choose to take, as long as they do not break free from their duties and as long as the system doesn't collapse. a death that could serve as a symbol of punishment towards solidarity and altruism but a win for revolution.
#okay gege came for me when i said i didn't like kusakabe and now i'm thinking so much about him and his purpose in the story#why would he go against his own ideal and what is his purpose besides introducing questions like 'is self sacrifice noble?' you know?#so that got me thinking about him dying or suffering a big loss and how that would consolidate his character in my eyes#unless his purpose is completely different and i'm just deeply misreading the situation#if his purpose is to simply highlight personal choices and free will vs his generation's dogma#then i suppose him dying could serve no purpose but i'm not finding that side of the coin very straightforward or totally compelling#but again i feel like i'm failing to read him so maybe it is skill issue#anyway obsessed with kusakabe today awkkajwkaj feeling personally attacked by this twisted chain of events#gege really came for my ass after i was vocal about my kusakabe hate (which i feel like is dead at this point rip 🕊️)#which by the way is so mean. god forbid a bisexual do anything 😔 why can't i be a hater man?#also don't take this post seriously it's more about my mediocre reading of his character and my headcanons/wishes than a theory#i'm not trying to imply he will die or that there is narrative purpose in that#just that it makes sense in my brain if that's the case and the plan gege has for his character#but also he's literally the info dumpster gege probably wouldn't kill him because who will explain things to us ����#he's like our amateur narrator i bet that gives him total plot armour#ps. maybe this is just my zero braincells moment#i just hate that i don't get it like i want to understand why he exists#but i'm aware that maybe this is a me thing and maybe everyone else just get it#and that makes me feel like that meme#let me iiiinnnn#okay bye
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Man..
#sorry i'm still upset about bridal sharena. like YEAH she's an incredibly powerful incredibly useful unit#pair her up w winter edelgard and the girlies are cleaning up tt maps extremely efficiently#and YEAH. she absolutely has nice art and huge win for the power of friendship. w veronica.#but man. it's like. i can't even enjoy my time w her.#due to. extremely specific things about me that are entirely a me issue and i can acknowledge that and own that.#it would probably feel less bad if like. sharena got literally anything else. in between now and her bunny alt.#like YEAH... she is the other half of the alfonse duo. which is the cutest shit and i love them so much#idk i know it's a non-problem. it feels dumb to make it a problem.#but genuinely like. i don't like using her w the animations on i don't really like checking the home screen dialogue#it's INTERESTING. for lore/characterization purposes. it's funny and charming bc ofc it is!!!#it's sharena and veronica ofc they're gonna be funny and charming!!!!!!! they are SO endearing to me#but god. i really do just. have problems. and it feels soooooo upsetting that like#my very specific problems are preventing me from enjoying WHAT SHOULD BE. something i should really like!!!!!!!#like there are NO problems w her!!!!!!!!!!!! the problem is ME!!!!!!!!!!!!! i'm gonna thrup#why didn't intsys consult me about this. the unemployable shut-in who runs a semi-obscure tumblr blog. in america#unbelievable..#like would i sound insane if i said marriage is like a trigger for me. like completely seriously and unironically.#like. again. it is such a non-issue. and all of it is on me to choose what i engage w that IS how managing your triggers works.#please please pleeeease don't misconstrue anything i'm saying i'm being vulnerable. rn. and petty. super fucking petty.#and obviously i can just. not use her. or use her minimally. but that's really not my point here i'm not looking for solutions#i'm just. expressing how uniquely upsetting this situation is. w how intense my askr sib interest is#w the fact that sharena IS. absolutely one of my fave charas. i adore her completely and she means so much to me#this feels like. a saw trap. made just for me.#idk again there is no solution here and i fully acknowledge this is a skill issue and realistically not even a problem.#but like. can anybody hear me. it's so dark in here.
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if labels are forced to confirm to whatever whims an individual wants, is it a label at all words have meanings you can't just make a word mean what you want it to be ???
#yes this is about the ace post i saw but people are so up in arms i didn't even want to touch it but like omw...if you try to make a term#inclusive for anything doesnt that just make the label nonexistant#like why r people getting mad about calling themselves a term and then not abiding by anything that the term represents#like people can say oh but i am this term but I have exceptions that go directly against what this label represents#i am personally not someone who likes to use labels for identification but like#as someone who leans on the spectrum of autism if someone said theyre autistic like a cutesy term to represent a quirk im not going to#take them seriously#but then if people get mad about it because everyone can call themselves whatever they want???#that just negates the whole purpose of the term in the first place????#and actually diminishes people who are actually categorized in such a way????#its like if you say youre a dog lover but you dont interact with dogs or like anything about dogs but your excuse is I PET DOGS SOMETIMES#bro that doesnt make you a dog LOVER you just pet a dog sometimes its not your favorite animal and thats okay but why are you insisting tha#you are a dog lover when all evidence points to that youre not#what clout do you get saying you're this label you could just pick a different label if u really wanted to
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Using this as an audio reference for the posts I'm making, but to summarize:
Yuri starts out mad.
Yuri tries to calm himself down with a deep breath to ask for details instead of going through it angry.
Flynn doesn't say "like a good knight" in the sense of putting himself down. He simply says "as a knight" (the tl here doesn't use that, but with that included it's basically along the lines of "even though I had doubts, as a knight, I was determined to follow my orders").
Once Yuri has answers he calms down significantly.
Yuri uses " 'ttaku", which is a shortened down version of "mattaku" (Yuri often shortens words and speaks very casually), which in this particular situation basically would mean "geez", or "good grief". In this manner, it's expressive of exasperation/frustration/etc.
Yuri never mentions that "Flynn told him what to do" like the dub does (because in fact Flynn did not ever tell Yuri what to do. He only gave Sodia and his other knights orders. He expressed his own desire to take responsibility, but never told Yuri and his friends what to do).
At this point you can tell the anger has gone out of him and that he's calmed down, now that Flynn is approaching this with admission and responsibility.
Sodia is asking that Flynn returns as soon as possible (I believe this was a general translation error).
Flynn's thank you to Yuri is tonally much more heartfelt.
Yuri's response and gratefulness at Flynn coming back to himself is tonally much more heartfelt, relieved and sincere.
#GTF Vesperia Clips#basically the dub version is littered with errors /and/ your regular resident angry dub Yuri#just to be clear on mattaku it can also mean ''completely'' ''totally'' ''seriously'' etc. it depends on the context#''yare yare'' is also used for ''geez'' and ''good grief'' but in a more sarcastic/casual way#''mattaku'' or in this case '' 'ttaku'' is more of a quiet expression of exasperation rather than smth you'd yell/shout when aggravated#it CAN sometimes be used like damn as a minor expletive but tbh I personally I wouldn't put it in this situation#bc his aggravation is lessening and they're getting to the point so I'd argue it's more just exhausted of the whole thing#but the dub took it a step further and used it as fuel against Flynn as they do mcfuckin' do#I'd say it's more ''damn it'' at the whole situation bc there's absolutely no reason at this point to say ''damn it Flynn''#esp bc that led into the dub having Yuri go at him accusing him of telling them what to do when he... literally did not#and did not even imply he was going to. it was just pulled from their asses and/bc Yuri never even said Flynn's name there#it's stuff like this where they add remove and change things always in stark opposite of Flynn's favor that riles me up :/#what I mean is that the dub changed Yuri's overall exasperation into smth accusatory when rly Yuri is like#stop trying to do this by yourself. it was never about oh woe is me how dare you tell us what to do#if he was directing a ''damn it'' at Flynn it STILL would not be bc ''he told them what to do''#it would STILL BE because Flynn was trying to take this responsibility fully onto himself#it's so irritating bc the dub will be spot on right on point with everything but then AS SOON as it's abt Flynn it's like#they start messing around with things and the tl is changed and yadda yadda until around late arc 2#it like lowkey comes across as enemy to ally instead of ally with a whole character arc#and the reason I legit feel like they did it on purpose is BECAUSE they can obviously tl correctly based on other areas of the game#but when Flynn is involved they tweak things if not just outright change the context (remember my Nordopolica post? yeahhhh)#how is that not on purpose? how is it that everything can be spot on for a chunk all at once#but then a certain char shows up and it's repeatedly inaccurate? repeatedly geared in a negative light that originally didn't even EXIST?#and then ofc they almost always use Yuri himself to reflect that negativity against Flynn which is a WHOLE other story/issue for me#it's like... say I wrote a neutral statement. someone comes along and tls with negative sounding additions. it's sort of like that#I'm not that good at explaining things/how I feel abt things but yeah I hope that makes sense#it's just like... I KNOW they can tl spot on so when I keep seeing them stick in all these things with/against Flynn it upsets me sm#it feels like they tl normally and then see Flynn and go oh hold on let's change that bc it's Flynn#and that's why it's so frustrating for me :/
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thinking about dream daddy again and god brian makes me so mad
#random thoughts#dream daddy#HIS ROUTE ISN'T EVEN ABOUT HIM#okay so the thing about the fleshed-out routes is you can tell a lot about a character depending on how many people are around#like with craig his first two dates involve at least one of his kids and a lot of social interaction because he's so overworked#so his final date where you just spend time with HIM one-on-one hits a lot harder#while with joseph he surrounds you with people but takes little periods of time to be alone with you to make a move#before instantly surrounding you with people again so you don't have enough time to question if he just made a pass at you#which is why his final date with you on the boat hits so hard: he purposefully isolated you in a place you could not easily leave#so he could make his move#and with brian... all his dates involve daisy in some way#which would imply he's trying to maintain some sort of distance? but he's not. he actively wants to befriend you#daisy and amanda keep tagging along... and for what?#they're eventually sidelined anyway! each date involves a moment where daisy and amanda are gone and you get a moment alone with brian#brian is the dad whose kid is the most present in his route and it says. literally nothing about him#make it so your character keeps inviting brian out and brian keeps making it a 'bring your kid and make it a playdate' thing or SOMETHING#maybe he's been raising daisy by himself for so long he's a bit rusty on how to interact with someone he's interested in?#on the second date daisy and amanda could have stayed home. it would change nothing#have daisy be sick and amanda be otherwise involved (maybe imply they're both faking to get out of fishing/get brian and mc to smooch)#like i don't think i'd mind daisy being around so much if she wasn't such a nothing burger of a character#give her some flaws! have amanda think she's weird or creepy! show us why she has no friends!#why is brian's route centered around our mc's daddy issues. we don't know his dad. we don't give a shit about his dad.#brian's route's main conflict ISN'T EVEN ABOUT HIM??? WHAT THE FUCK#you're essentially forcing us to make a character choice based on a backstory you also forced on us. you fallout 4'd us.#like okay. there's a lot of 'here's a part of your backstory you didn't know about' in dream daddy but this specifically doesn't work#like the ska band? it's a jokey plot device that's kind of weak but also a bit whatever#alex? is an explanation for why you're a single parent. very sad. not very fleshed out.#mc's dad? IS THE FOCUS OF AN ENTIRE ROUTE?????? WHAT THE FUCJ#literally no reason to do that. it makes brian a flatter character whose whole purpose is to react to your daddy issues#GIVE HIM FLAWS. MAKE HIM THE ONE WHO TAKES THE COMPETITION TOO SERIOUSLY
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fascinated by the number of replies on that poll that are just "no bc it's none of my business" like. ok???? extremely weird point to make. would it also be none of your business if that friend like. mugged somebody. hit their partner. tf does "it's not my business" have to do with anything they have displayed blatant disregard for the trust and love of others. it's GONNA be your business when they do some heinous shit behind your back.
#idk man i think ppl give run of the mill cheaters too much credit like#“yeah but are they sorry?” “yeah but did they only do it once?” do you think cheaters are like. possessed. like they black out and do shit#what is so complicated about "person has agreed to terms in a relationship in which both parties have placed a lot of trust in each other#only to turn around and DECIDE (BECAUSE YOU DON'T? ACCIDENTALLY CHEAT?) that actually my feelings are more important than other ppl's trust#i knew the replies would make me mad but VMIFKFJGFJJH seriously. it's none of your business. that's ALL you've got#yoshi talks#like i'm not saying they don't deserve to ever have friends again. i'm just saying if someone treats people who trust them#that badly on purpose that like. if they do lose friends they have no one to blame but themself.#and also like i'm lowkey concerned for all these ppl just waving off any responsibility like! cool! good to know i can't#count on you not to literally find out someone has been mistreated and then pretend you didn't see it either!#like u know that a) you ALSO sound like an untrustworthy loser who will just decide throw ppl to the wolves#and b) you're like? putting yourself at risk of being lied to or turned on or betrayed too? if ur friend can do that to one person#they can do it to ANYONE. that means u too!!! get out of there!!!! u deserve friends who won't throw u away like trash the second ur#friendship inconveniences them!!!!
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Primink's latest video about internet sweetheart going "because it's all fake, he's creating these narratives, which makes the way he portrays certain groups seem malicious" >>>
#sorry but every time i see someone understand basic media literacy concepts i have to complain on tumblr about it#do we think all those 25-year-olds who didn't seem to get this were being serious or willfully ignorant#i have media literacy but idk how to deal with people. but they had to know right. like logically you can't... live like that. right?#willful ignorance so you don't have to acknowledge your flaws makes more sense i think.#yknow this actually makes me feel better about being on tumblr as a whole. i'm not deactivating anymore#i was like. seriously going to deactivate once my other fandom queue runs out but maybe i won't actually#they're all just being dicks on purpose! i don't have to try to fix anybody! they're loser assholes! yahoo!!#enjoy the other drafts i queued bc i thought i was deactivating :)
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disordered eating talk in the tags
#disordered eating cw#so like i did a stupid and took my meds this morning without eating breakfast and about mid morning#i had too much water and got super nauseous and had to throw up#and i realized that i still have a weird THING around purging#i don't feel like throwing up is an experience that should engender a sense of comfort in a person but it does in me#like i didn't even have anything in my stomach it's not like i had binged or whatever#but just the purgative act in itself feels GOOD to me#like a relief#kind of brings to mind how in my most stressful/mental breakdown-y times or during panic attacks all that's ever clear in my mind#is a desire to throw up. to just get this horrible feeling i can't process out of me#and i think it kinda speaks to how much food and eating or not eating or *purging* was how i found control and a sense of stability#having ednos is irritating bc it basically means you did a little of everything and none of those individual things ever got really dramatic#so it wasn't exactly noticeable but it all adds up into a pattern of behavior around food that's just deeply dysfunctional#and getting people to take it seriously is really difficult bc so many of those behaviors are normalized#but all those little behaviors were how i took back control. i would spite the people around me who policed my body by binging#i would try to control how i felt about myself (and how other people saw me and treated me) by restricting#and when i felt out of control i would take it back and reground by purging#so even now if im stressed out (which i am lately) it feels comforting and grounding to purge#even if im not doing it on purpose#which is....fucked tbh. i guess on just a primal level it makes some sense bc that's how our bodies protect us from things we've ingested#that could potentially harm us. so of course there's some relief around it. but im not eating anything that will hurt me#it's all just shame and terror and feelings i can't express and wanting them OUT#thankfully it's not something ive ever done chronically bc the stigma against EDs in my house growing up was also high#and if i didn't throw up or totally starve myself it was just dieting right? i would only half starve myself#and i would only throw up here and there. as a treat. once or twice isn't an eting disorder surely?#i just really regret how much ''bad'' food i just ate and i want a do over. it's not disordered if it's just this one time#this is a special circumstance and I'm Different#goddddddddddddddd#what's wild too is i can look back on this stuff now and see it for what it was but to most people none of that behavior#would ping as a Real Disorder
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