#i romantize their pov be aware
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kissnpunch · 1 year ago
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this scene is so… cute in their story of love, because q!cellbit gave him a cup of tea to catch his attention, q!roier saw that and gave him one too attentive of his husband actions and words, after knowing the competition was done, q!roier instantly said “sorry, sorry” and q!cellbit, catching q!roier just followed his instincts and was feeling a little bit guilty (that is a lot coming for a perfect killer), said it was okay, how he would judge him if q!roier supported him at his worst?.
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fraternum-momentum · 10 months ago
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I CANT I CANTTTTTTT I WILL LITERALLY EXPLODE RJIKNHGKRSBKFUCKNHJHFBNJEA JFHBAEJHBFJHBHBHBHBHBBAZHJDBAJHDBAJKHBDJKNA????A//////!?!!!!!!!!??!!???!?!?!??!! I CANNOT I LITERALLY NOT THE CAN I CANTTTTTT RAUGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
#⚠️WARNING⚠️TAGS R SUPER FUCKING LONG I NEEEEED TO RAMBLE ABOUT LOVE AND DEEPSPACE I HAVE SO MANY THOUGHTS#SUGGESTIVE ART? NSFW? LITERAL GODDAMN PORN? LIGHT WORK NO REACTION#POV ROMANTIC OTOME GAME SHIT WITH THE TINIEST HINT OF SPICE??? I CANNOT ITS TOO MCUH I ITS AUGHHH IM JNUHJHFUCKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKK#IM LIKE FUCKING PLAYING THIS GAME WITH A HAND COVERING MY EYES WHILE PEEKING ITS TOO MUCH#I AM LOOKING AWAY EVERY SECOND IM NOT STRONG ENOUGH FUCKUNGBHGJGHJHGHGBJJH#I HATE HATE HATEEEEE (not rly) IT WHEN THEY GET NEAR U ITS AUGH ITS SO WEIRD I PUT MY PHONE FURTHER AWAY FROM ME OUT OF EMBARASSMENT#SOMETIMES I LOSE MY IMMERSION AND GET SELF AWARE AND THINK TO MYSELF THIS IS SO FUCKING WEIRD... THIS IS WHY I DONT PLAY OTOME GAMES DUDE#like no hate to otome games its just way too much for me i get way too embarassed abt playing them its def a me thing#ok first of all the combat is p ok actually it reminds me of pgr and hi3 altho i like pgr better :] (lee my beloved)#i did burst out laughing when i found out abt it cause i thought it would be like mysme and its just visual novel shit but its really okay#also i did a bit of thinking as to why i dont find the charas super appealing & its cause theyre obv manifactured to b 'the perfect guy'#like you know how pugs were bred to be cute but end up deformed and stuff? yea kinda like that#im not saying theyre deformed but thats the vibes im getting#deformed pug vibes#the jp vas are pulling thru though#ALSO I AM SO FUCKING TIRED OF GACHA pleaseee i alr play hsr + gi + /occasionally/ pgr and stopppp i hate the gamba aspect of the games#AND IM NOT JUST SAYING THAT BC I DIDNT GET THE CARD I WANT#.................. OKAY SO MAYBE I DIDNT GET WHAT I WANT THE POINT STILL STANDS#i like them (reluctantly) all so far ? idk no one is rlly my fav yet tbf im still at ch. 2 so..#theyre all cute ig zayne is nice maybe i dunno i like his shoulders......? hes very cold tho cause haha ice powers#i call him elsa in my head#xaiver is also nice? hes cute? hes sleepy n shit#rafayel is kinda goofy? aloof? but in the 'she's so crazzzzzzzzzy! i love her!' way (look it up if u dont know) and im not super into that#hes the one whimpering though so it is what it is#overall i think ill keep playing until i get the card i want ill also prolly play it on my laptop instead cause its super laggy on my phone#idk how ill deal with the combat part tho but thats a problem for future me lolol#okay yea idk if anyone is still reading this but i dont want my irls to know that im playing this game so here we r#idk why im using the tags to ramble its way more fun like its more casual i think#OKAY YEA BYE#frambling...?
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dracomort · 1 year ago
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Hello! I wanted to ask why tom was acting clingy with Draco after having found out he’s Draco’s boggart, the clinical scrutiny as he watched Draco undress, was he compensating in a way?
Just to clarify—he wasn't 'acting clingy', objectively speaking, but rather relative to his usual aloofness. Tom has no instinct for physical affection, so most of it is left up to Draco to initiate, which is why Draco ends up with such a sideways misunderstanding of their relationship. Tom spends a lot of time mirroring and imitating behaviour he has seen, so he's obviously out of his depth in a romantic relationship.
Tom doesn't feel guilt or the need to compensate, precisely, but he is feeling a combo of unease, frustration and helplessness. He doesn't feel ashamed of or responsible for his future, but he dislikes the lack of control he feels over a facet of Draco's relationship with him. Control is a big thing for him, hence why he adds wards to their door. It's an irrational action. There's nothing to protect against, but it helps him feel like he's doing something.
In general, when writing Bluebeard, I always thought of Tom as someone who doesn't so much care about Draco's feelings, as he cares about how Draco makes him feel. So when Draco's upset, Tom isn't getting what he wants out of their relationship. Thus, he goes about getting Draco back to the state in which Tom enjoys his company. Sounds pretty cold but functionally it's the same thing as being a good boyfriend 😂. Not to say he has zero empathy for Draco, but it comes and goes in little flickers. His brain just works different.
Tom's 'clinical scrutiny' is really just his thinking face hahaha. Draco's a bit of a prude and feeling vulnerable because of the circumstances. Tom is thinking about how to fix the situation, drawing on his very limited life experience. It didn't make it into the fic because Tom never would have spoken about it, but he does have a few fleeting memories of having his hair washed by older girls at the orphanage when he was very small that he associates some degree of comfort and safety with. So that is what he draws on.
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demonstars · 2 years ago
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🔥 on dnf?
dnf weird fucking friendship precedes and surpasses any kind of romantic and sexual feeling they might have toward each other. which is why I hate the take that dnf is pandering, or have started to pander more: they've just gotten more comfortable in showing a side of this insane friendship they've got there. of course they know people like it, but that's not the reason it started, but it's just cause they're like that. have weird friendships guys!!! it's okay if not everything is strictly platonic as long as both of u are comfortable!
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mejomonster · 2 years ago
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Silent Reading, chapter 17. I just really like priests descriptions of the city:
The night had turned sultry without any warning; the summer heat was oppressive. Birds occasionally hurtled daringly through the sea of cars, almost skimming the ground, hinting that a rainstorm was about to strike.
Friday’s evening rush hour regularly lasted longer than usual, but luckily this was the last day of the traffic restriction. The city center was warming up for the weekend. The enormous outdoor Skyscreen unfolded, dazzling the eye with its scrolling LEDs. These nighttime lights relentlessly pursued all the people coming and going and crossed over the wide road to flash over Luo Wenzhou’s car, ceasing hostilities only when he had thoroughly wound his way into the complicated streets of the West District.
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cherrysdeck · 1 month ago
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Pick a card: The eyes Chico, they never lie.
Your future spouse's pov of you.
Remember: Take only what resonates, this is a general reading. Tarot readings are done with entertainment purposes only. Hope you like it!
Pile 1 -> 4
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Pile 1
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2 of cups, page of cups, the fool, 7 of wands, queen of cups, 2 of swords
Welcome to your reading pile 1! Ironically (because of my blog’s name) when I started shuffling Harry Styles’ Cherry came to mind. I feel like laying face up and just sigh very heavily. Your fs is someone so so romantic, but they might have trouble openly expressing this part of themselves. They are the type of person to just stare at you in secret. Because you’re pretty, and you’re smart, and you’re ignoring me so you’re obviously my type. Those kind of vibes. They look at you truly with so much admiration, it kind of scares them to approach. I feel like you’re always booked and busy, always on the run, so they might feel a little bit wary of wasting your time. They will want to wait for the perfect time to talk to you. In their eyes, you’re just so soft and beautiful, someone they want to protect and hug, and never leave your side. Eye contact is really important in this pile. I feel like you might have some kind of sad eyes, they can clearly see every emotion on your eyes. They’re very perceptive, and very emotional intelligent. But they might consider you so independent that they shy a little when it comes to offer help and support. They see you as such a strong and reliable person, someone that stands up for others, that always know what to say. They also see you as their perfect match. Maybe you two mirror each other, whether your personalities or your past experiences. But there’s a really deep understanding of the other. They might be hesitant about approaching, because they might feel a little bit insecure. They have put you on such a pedestal (where you should be honestly) that they don’t think they’re worthy of you. Too good for them. This will turn in a very slow-burn situation. But it’s because they think you deserve the best and only the best. You’re so sweet in their eyes pile 1. It’s like an adoration overload. They truly want to make your life easier, acts of deed and gift giving might be their love language. 
Pile 2
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the devil, knight of cups, justice, king of wands, 5 of wands, the world, knight of pentacles, 2 of cups 
Hello, hello pile 2. You make hot and bothered , first thing I got, oh well. I feel my mind all mushy and confused. Hot n Cold by Katy Perry. What are you doing to them pile 2? I feel like you’re a kind of intimidating, cold, very focused on your goals, you know what you want, when to do something, very powerful. And they’re just, well, perplexed. You know yourself so well, you’re passionate about the things you like, have well defined morals and values. I feel like you’re often on the eye of the storm. They just don’t know what to do. You’re a well rounded person, know your qualities but also aware of your faults, and you’re working on improving yourself constantly. You’re not someone that can be stopped easily, like a bull, your eyes are set one something then you’ll do anything to get it. I feel like honesty might be your best and worst trait at the same time. They see you as someone who will say what’s exactly on your mind, no sugarcoat, just plain truth, but might forget to consider others and your words might hurt a little. They might want to live up to you, like wanting to follow your steps, kind of like a consort, a step behind. They definitely like when you take control, and will let you take it anytime. This is the part when they get turned on about you, but might not want to admit it out loud. I feel like your presence makes them very happy, just with being by your side is enough for them, kind of person that enjoys doing different things in silence but in the same room. I just got Megan Fox, like how sensual she is, how confident she is, how smart and perfect she is. Will go anywhere, anywhere, by your hand. Breakfast in bed, let’s just stay in all day. They definitely want you all by themselves, I feel like they might have some possessive tendencies (nothing too much, don’t worry). They just feel that you are so wonderful, and it’s clear that he’s not the only one that sees that, that they don’t want to share, or feel they have to compete for your attention. They want to prove themselves to you and show you they’re everything and the only one you need.
Pile 3
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the wheel, page of swords, queen of cups, page of wands, the sun, temperance. 6 of wands, king of pentacles
Hi and welcome pile 3. Right off the bat, they love your laugh. Like really love your smile, kind of person that will do anything to make you laugh, even if it means doing something a little bit embarrassing in public. Your fs sees you as someone that is bubbly, out going, positive, very friendly, morning person. But they know that behind that you have gone through your fair share of struggles and have to build yourself up, they’re very proud of you. They see you as someone successful, knows how to manage themselves financially. You have a good balance between work and play. You value your career a lot, and might be a very important aspect of your life, but you know when to clock out and relax, and enjoy other things. They see you as someone adventurous and brave, they want to travel around the world with you, explore with you, do some adrenaline crazy activities too. I feel like food is relevant lol, like going to nice restaurants together, cooking and creating and trying new recipes together, like it’s your favourite bonding activity. Strawberries covered in chocolate. You’re also really smart, they just never get tired of listening to you speak, about anything and everything, you might be a great story teller too. You might know about so many different and sometimes unexpected topics, that they admire you for it. They feel like your mind is a wonder. You’re really brave pile 3, I feel like clapping for you right now. You know how to navigate obstacles and maintaining a positive outlook on life not matter what it throws back at you. Very rational and serious when needed, but knows when to let your hair loose and have fun too. They see you as someone who is so cute and huggable. Your happiness is definitely one of their priorities, and they hate to see you down. I’m going to stress this again, they’re really really proud of you. That message is coming so strong, and if you remember one thing only about this reading let it be that they’re so proud of you pile 3. 
Pile 4
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2 of wands, 10 of swords, page of pentacles, 5 of cups, 4 of cups, the world rev, the emperor
Hello pile 4, do you want a hug? I feel like giving you a hug. You’re so strong pile 4, but your fs can see right through you. I know you like hiding your emotions and problems from others, but you can’t trick your fs, seriously. I know it’s hard to open up, and I know it’s scary, and you might have been betrayed or ignored by people you thought you could trust, but your fs is here for you. They want to crack your shell, know about every part of you, the good, the bad, the ugly, the pretty. I want you to see yourself the way I see you. You might stubborn about sharing your issues, you want to do everything by yourself, but I feel like is coming from a place of disappointment. You’ve been let down so many times, you don’t want to go through it again. But your fs is not going anywhere. I feel like they find you stubbornness funny, kind of teasing you until you open up or confess. You might be wary at the beginning to start a romantic relationship, or to even admit you like your fs, but they know and they want to hear you say it. Your fs will soften you up with time. They just want to help you, want to support you on your plans for the future, want to have plans for the future that involves the two of you. They see you as someone so resilient and that has had to stand alone for so long, they don’t want you to do that anymore. They’re here now, they’re not going anywhere, they got you. It feels like walks at midnight, being in your own bubble, everyone can feel the tension, even if you deny it. You two have such a great chemistry, it just makes sense, you fit perfectly, if only you see that too. It’s not going to be a perfect path from now, and there will be more obstacles on your way, but you two can do this, together. Your fs sees it that if you’re together you’ll be fine, you’ll get through whatever. Your fs is not going to let you down.
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Xo, Xo, Cherry 💋
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asha-mage · 7 months ago
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A SVSSS fic I want to write one day is Airplane and Shen Yuan being ejected from the System and sent back to the mundane world, but with the difference that Shen Yuan's 'edits' to the story have been retroactively applied to PiDW and as a result it's gone from 'top story in a hyper specific web culture niche' to 'international sensation with a Netflix adaption in the works'.
Keyly, PiDW is still told largely from the PoV of Luo Binghe- so neither he nor the audience is at all aware that it's now Isekai story. Instead it's billed as this heady romantic drama about prejudice, the passage of time, and redemption- where a big part of the appeal is trying to piece together the otherwise enigmatic Shen Qingqiu's motives.
Was he harsh on Binghe initially because of he sensed/knew about Binghe's demon heritage (as it's now possible to find hints that he may have in fact known all along)? Or because he saw Binghe's potential and wanted to do the tough-love training thing? Or was it because he was trying to chase Binghe away from Cultivation because he knew it would lead Binghe to misery one day? Did he throw Binghe into the Abyss because he was genuinely shocked and disgusted by the Demon reveal? Or because he knew Binghe would be killed if he stayed and he was trying to 'protect' him? Or was it because he genuinely wanted Binghe to fulfill his demon Emperor destiny and thought a clean break would do it? The fandom has no idea but lovvvvvves arguing about it.
This all leads to things coming full circle, as Cucumber, sounding like an absolute insane person, is left to rant online about how the obvious answer is that Shen Qingqiu was Isekai'd earlier in the story and replaced by a completely different person- a theory which is mocked to the point of memery, and leads to Cucumber being dunked on endlessly, no matter how much evidence he brings up or how many essays he writes.
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amywritesthings · 3 months ago
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dating on airplane mode. | part one.
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( Read on AO3 )
Pairing: levi ackerman x f!reader (attack on titan / shingeki no kyojin) Word Count: 3.9k Summary: So you're dating your neighbor who also happens to be a sex hotline dom named Levi Ackerman. Stranger things have happened, right?
Warnings: 18+ MINORS DNI - alternate universe (modern), slow burn, eventual smut, sex work, neighbors au, newly established relationship, dual pov, the direct sequel to Press Four For More Options Credits: dividers by @saradika-graphics submitted for @levievent 's #levimonth24 / day 22: neighbors
part two. | masterlist
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“I'm seeing someone.”
Tea goes flying — metaphorically and physically.
When he confessed a new (and very unexpected) development in his (borderline nonexistent) dating life, Levi hadn’t anticipated Hange Zoe turning directly towards Erwin Smith to unleash a devastating spit-take attack to the face.
It’s a direct hit.
Erwin heroically takes the brunt of the damage, so at least his furniture is spared.
(Levi didn’t need to spend the rest of the afternoon scrubbing down the already scrubbed-down living room.)
Hange’s shout is shrill, the realization hitting them like a full-throttle freight train.
“You’re what?”
“He said he’s seeing someone,” Erwin answers in monotone before Levi can even try. 
The tall blonde extends a hand to leisurely grab the napkin cradling the bottom of his tea saucer. In true Erwin fashion, he doesn’t even blink at Hange’s dramatics — or their consequences unto him.
He raises the napkin to blot the side of his face sprinkled with a mixture of freshly-brewed lavender tea and Hange’s saliva.
(Then again, Hange could abruptly bang pots and pans in the middle of the night and Erwin would merely call it a minor inconvenience to his sleep routine.)
“No, no, I heard what he said,” Hange recovers with a crack to their voice, “but I can’t tell if he’s messing with us.”
“I’m not,” Levi flatly states.
“Okay, but how do we know?”
“Hange—”
Except it’s Erwin intercepting once more. “Because he would never pretend to have a significant other when one of his closest friends happens to be you.”
Hange squints, pushing their glasses up the bridge of their nose.
“Why? ‘Cause I joked that I’d stalk him the next time he finally found a date? That was one time, Erwin.”
Erwin rolls his neck to the right, offering Hange a pair of thick, disbelieving eyebrows.
“Technically speaking, Zoe, you threatened to stalk either of us if you caught even a sniff that we could be in the midst of a romantic pursuit. Plus, we’re well aware of the disguise kit collecting dust in the trunk of Moblit’s car.”
An instant shit-eating grin passes across their lips.
“Ha. Fair.”
If Levi’s eyeballs could roll any further into the back of his skull, they’d get stuck.
“However,” Erwin adds, those bold blue eyes flickering back towards Levi, “it doesn’t explain why we were in the dark until now. At the very least, we should hope you would feel safe enough to confide in us about someone you are serious about dating.”
Yeah. 
Out of his two friends sitting across from him, Levi figured Erwin would be the most suspicious of the surprise announcement.
Now that it’s been a few days since That Fateful Night, he doesn’t feel as self-conscious to confess his new reality.
It was as good of a time as any to rip the proverbial band-aid off.
(Besides, it was only a matter of mistakes before his friends learned the truth for themselves.)
Hange, Erwin, Moblit — they’re his only remaining connections tying him to this city. The others from his gym days have all found offers in other towns, returned to their old homes—
Moved on.
Meeting Erwin Smith in boot camp changed the trajectory of his life, for better or worse. 
Levi had known the man longer than he knew anyone else — but only by a few days and some change, considering he was destined (Hange’s words, not his) to meet the hyper scientist and their subdued partner, Moblit, in the army as well.
Then, as if attached to the hip, all four of them agreed to work at Erwin’s gym.
When that fell through, Erwin found the Scout Services Hotline.
.
.
— —
.
.
    The announcement came to him one summer evening with a printed job description and a six pack of beer.
Levi assumed Erwin’s confession on taking a sex hotline job had been one weird, shitty joke.
Picturing stoic, pragmatic Erwin Smith telling people how to fuck themselves in their bedrooms late at night for the almighty dollar felt obscene. 
Hell, it was obscene.
Levi didn’t want to consider his oldest friend in such a compromising position, but there it was laid before him without shame or fear of judgment.
Becoming a part-time sex worker for Erwin was as noncommittal as taking up a fleeting niche interest — like exotic bird watching or crocheting sweaters for fucking cats.
“At the gym, we improved upon people’s lives,” Erwin had told him while sipping his beer, staring out to the city sightline from Levi’s balcony. “Who has the authority to say this job isn’t doing something similar to those who may be lonely?”
“You would make yapping on a damn sex hotline prophetic,” Levi scoffed in return. “Selling some shitty porn script a dozen times a night sounds like the closest you could get to Hell.”
“I disagree,” Erwin argued without heat. “When I interviewed, they stated every employee is given the ability to do as they please. To show their strengths and make it their own.”
“Bullshit.”
“It isn’t.” 
Erwin rested the beer bottle on the knee of his trousers. 
“Flexible work hours give me the ability to find another place the gym can call home. The pay would certainly cover any initial costs after several years.”
“Several years?”
Levi frowned, sitting up straighter in his chair.
“Erwin… c’mon. Just take a second to listen to yourself.”
“I’m only offering a chance for you to do the same. You may not be fond of people, Levi, but you’re loyal to a stubborn fault.”
Erwin gave him a sidelong glance.
“I know you won’t put in applications to go to any other gym.”
“Tch.”
A dismissive sound was all he could muster at the time.
He always hated how Erwin could open the cavity of his chest and put his damn bleeding heart on display.
“Who says I haven’t been window shopping to pass the damn unemployment time?”
“I wish you would,” Erwin replied with a heavy sigh. “Your skills are better when in use, not lying waste with the rest of us.”
“Hange and Moblit’re doing just fine.”
Hange, a self-proclaimed babbler, returned to Paradis University to make headway on some fascinating research projects side by side with Moblit. 
It was where they belonged, really.
“Fine, then lying waste with me.”
After a beat, Erwin slid his hand across the space between their chairs and held out a slip of paper.
"Look it over. Really sit down and think about what you did for our fighters and see where I’m coming from. You have a knack for leading. Of making people believe in themselves at their lowest."
He made it a point to stop. Stare.
Levi bit his tongue, meeting his friend's stern gaze.
"Conventional or not, you would still be helping people. Even if it’s a job for a month, at least you’ll be putting a hell of a lot of money in your pocket. It's better than waiting for my signal to move on.”
.
.
— —
.
.
    The bastard was always great at a rousing speech.
That night was the night Levi plugged in the damn website and read the job description.
By morning, he had submitted his application for a part-time hotline employee that included an .mp3 file auditioning his voice.
Erwin must have told his boss that he had a life-long friend possibly interested in the position, because by that night?
Levi Ackerman had a job.
A night turned into a month.
A month turned into six. 
Six to a year.
Suddenly denying begging, pleading people from their chased orgasms became as second nature as completing an Excel sheet.
Yet nothing else changed.
Levi still kept to himself.
Considering the friend group worked odd hours — Erwin with his own clientele, Moblit working towards his Masters, and Hange testing the scientific project of the week at the same university when unsupervised — it was easy to.
Wake up. Work out. Eat. Run errands. Clock in for work. Clock out. Eat. Sleep. 
Repeat.
Routine.
Hell, a lot of his life worked like a well-oiled machine until you showed up.
Now his world is slightly spinning off-axis, and he knows:
Without talking to his friends about his (uncharacteristically selfish and) impulsive decision, everything could very well go up in flames.
(Because when it comes to sticking matters of the heart and Levi Ackerman in one room, the former never walks out.)
After a pregnant pause in this three-way stand-off, Hange leans in, pressing both hands onto the tops of their thighs. 
“So when you say you’re seeing someone, you mean like… romantically?”
“As opposed to what?” Levi flatly asks.
“Well, seeing someone could mean anything, especially for you,” Hange reasons. Levi’s eyes narrow when Erwin gives that short huff of air through his nose like he’s stifling a laugh. “You could be seeing someone about finally fixing your dryer.”
“Seriously?”
“I’m just saying, romantically isn’t the first idea that comes to mind!”
“I have to agree with Zoe,” Erwin finally states, shifting his blue eyes to Levi’s. “You never mentioned that you had met someone in our group chat, and you haven’t made any changes in your schedule that suggest otherwise.”
Levi can’t help but scoff.
“Oh, so now you’re following Hange’s goddamn Google calendar?”
That fucking calendar.
The ‘we’re so busy but we can’t lose touch just because the gym went under’ calendar hastily made at two in the morning and sent with a declaration of war if no one accepted the invite.
All four of them did.
(Then again, Moblit didn’t have much of a choice.)
“I check on occasion,” is Erwin’s short rebuttal, before sitting up straighter. “But the former argument stands: you didn’t tell us that you were dabbling in the dating scene.”
“Wouldn’t really call it dabbling, Erwin,” Levi huffs, picking up his tea cup by clawing the rim of the ceramic. “Shit just kind of happened.”
“Uh-uh,” Hange interrupts. “We’re not playing coy right now, Levi. I want details: name, height—”
“Occupation,” Erwin agrees.
“Where they’re from.”
“If they have siblings.”
“Do they live near here?”
“If they’re allergic to cats.”
An involuntary grimace passes over Levi’s face.
“Ooh! We also need to know if they like tennis,” Hange adds excitedly. “Don’t trust someone who likes tennis, spectator or player. They’re always too put together with an underlying layer of batshit crazy.”
Erwin halts mid-sip of his tea. 
“...I like tennis.”
Hange’s thumb and middle finger sharply snap. “Exactly.”
Enough.
Levi hastily pushes his black fringe out of his eyes with his free hand. “I— No, Jesus, can we stop speculating about her?”
“Why?” Erwin challenges.
“Because I told you what you needed to know,” Levi challenges without tripping over his words. “And I’d prefer to keep the rest of myself.”
“Ah, her.”
When he turns his attention to Hange, there’s a wicked glimmer in their eye.
Well, fuck him.
Too much has already been said.
Hange whistles low. 
“So how recently was this fair maiden introduced into thy friend’s life?”
“Don’t start talking like a freak, Four Eyes,” he warns them while they suppress a cackle between pressed lips. “And — fuck, fine. If no one is going to let it go—”
“We aren’t.”'
Erwin interrupts, making it two against one.
With a set glare at his blonde friend, the smaller man sinks further into his chair and sighs with reluctant resolve. 
“I… met her a few days ago. It...”
Trailing off, he sets his tea cup down to rub at his temples with one hand.
This is going to bring on a headache. 
He really doesn’t need it on a work night.
“You’re both going to have an opinion on the how, and trust me, so do I.”
Hange’s face screws up in confusion, but he sees it out of the corner of his eye.
Erwin grows still. Contemplative.
Yeah, he knew this was going to go terribly.
“Huh?” Hange whips their ponytail back and forth to look between both men, smacking themself on the sides of their face. “Why wouldn’t we approve of how? Is it one of the old fighters?”
Levi scoffs, dropping to sit back in his chair. “I’d rather choke.”
“Then I’m not following. You don’t even talk to cashiers at the grocery store.”
“When did she call the hotline?” Erwin asks, cutting straight through the bush instead of beating around it.
His stare is almost indiscernible. Stern.
(Protective.)
The lightbulb clicks. Hange finally settles their attention on him. 
“Whoa — wait, she’s a…”
“Former client,” Levi confesses after Hange trails off. “Emphasis on the former part.”
The room grows silent.
Levi doesn’t have the capacity to see Hange’s true reaction, because he’s keeping eye contact with Erwin.
Their own telepathic argument bounces back and forth like that very proverbial tennis ball Hange had so teasingly laid down.
The ethics of it all;
The logistics of what it could mean for the future;
The gravity of this choice and knowing its weight is crushing him.
Erwin’s gaze softens a fraction.
Levi’s shoulders relax, if only a little.
“And how did that opportunity come to pass?” the taller blonde finally asks, but it isn’t as harsh as Levi anticipated. 
Hell, it’s curious.
Willing — to not judge; to hear him out.
“Accidentally stumbled into her at the bar down the street,” Levi confesses.
Stumbled is an understatement.
.
.
— —
.
.
    “So then — what does this mean?”
He doesn’t know.
God, he has no fucking clue.
Just like he had no fucking clue you’d be at this bar tonight; that you not only lived in the area, but in the same goddamn building just a few floors south.
You were meant to be a fluke thing.
A moment of weakness.
An anomaly he could solve like every other problem in his life, one he could reason to death and move on from once you realized that this hotline is a slippery slope to financial debt.
At the end of the day, it wasn’t meant to be real.
The calls, the laughter, the exchange of stories felt real, but that’s the selling point.
Imagining idealism.
He could send as many discounted invoices as he could to management to ease the cost of your calls, but there was only so much he could do from his position.
Still—
That being said, he wanted this.
For the first time in a long time, he wanted something.
Ever since Erwin’s gym went under and the staff were forced to find something else in the interim, Levi Ackerman turned off his emotions. His passion.
Money was tight. 
Bills were bills. 
But there are worse things to do than apply to a remote-working sex hotline with the promise of flexible hours, medical insurance, and the opportunity to get away from people for a while.
Maybe he hadn’t realized he was simply going through the motions of buying a morning tea at the coffee shop down the street. 
Maybe he hadn’t noticed that his drive to push himself to the brink of exhaustion at the gym all but disappeared.
Maybe he existed to simply exist.
Then you called.
Petra had pinged him to let him know that there was someone looking for a deep voice — not surprising — with a tendency to overtalk and overthink.
Easy.
Those types always cave the second you call them a pet name or sprinkle a little praise.
Yet you burst into his life like a damn firework to the face and he’s never recovered since.
Being nervous is a staple on these calls. He’s heard every justification in the book just as he’s witnessed people use the hotline like they’re robots.
You wanted to talk.
Petra doesn’t send people to him if they want to talk.
(Did she know, somehow, that he needed this?)
Conspiracies aside, the last two weeks became some of the best of his life.
Now you knew his face, and he knew yours.
And Christ, you were beautiful. 
Your voice was one thing — like a soothing balm to his insomnia — but your face nearly took him right the hell out.
Even in the mirror backsplash of the bar, he couldn’t stop staring. Didn’t want to, not when he finally saw what he wanted right in the palm of his hand.
So he was honest.
Honest about his life, his job, his black hole of an existence — maybe to scare you away so you’d choose better than a guy like him.
That he was the first to break the rules.
That he was sorry, because you weren’t looking for more baggage after a shit breakup with a shithead of a guy.
You didn’t care.
So he decided to rip a page out of his goddamn advice book:
Be selfish.
“Well, if you don’t get too wasted with your friends tonight—”
Autopilot.
Everything is on autopilot when he picks up that damn pen and starts to scribble on a napkin, allowing his nervous system to suckerpunch his logic right out the damn window.
“—and you end up going to the gym tomorrow—”
Bail.
Bail, bail, bail, before you make a damn fool of yourself, Levi Ackerman.
He doesn’t.
He straightens his spine, folds the napkin, and reaches for your hand. 
The heat of it almost makes his stomach clench.
If he were bolder, then maybe he’d steal you away from your friends. Keep asking questions to make you talk more. Watch as your eyes light up about your favorite things—
He can’t. Won’t.
You’re with your friends. He’s already taken enough time away from them for you.
“—give me a call.”
Maybe he’s chickenshit for running, but at least there’s a part of him brave enough to leave him his personal cell number in the palm of your hand.
Before you can say anything, he drops some money on the counter to pay for both drinks and a tip and leaves to walk home.
To contemplate.
(Assuming you likely won’t call. He wouldn’t blame you.)
The night air leaves a sobering sting on his cheeks as he steps outside.
It’s considerably quieter than the cramped space of the bar, but cabs bustle in the street.
His pocket vibrates not once but twice.
(So not a text.)
Fishing his phone out, Levi squints at the ‘Unknown Caller’ ID staring up at him.
He swipes right to accept said call, pressing the phone to his ear.
“Hello, Levi Ackerman speaking.”
“Hi, Levi. It’s formerly Scarlet.”
His heart falls out of his ass.
Whipping back around to the tinted windows of the bar, Levi can’t help but look for that now-familiar face.
You’re blocked by an endless sea of conversations and bodies, but he still searches.
“My schedule just opened up,” you tell him from the other side of the line, your voice airy like you hold a secret. “I know it’s a little late for some coffee, but — are you free for some tea now?”
Shit.
Maybe he should be giving the headset for the hotline over to you.
“Depends,” Levi exhales. “Any shop worth a damn is closed at this hour.”
“Shit, you’re right.”
He liked it when you cursed. 
Hell, he liked it when you weren’t afraid to be yourself around him the most.
“There’s a pop-up shop about six floors above yours,” Levi reasons with a shrug he assumes you can’t see; autopilot, “if you don’t mind walking a neighbor home.”
.
.
— —
.
.
    “You said that?”
Hange, now at the brink of teetering off of their chair, gawks.
Levi blinks twice, realizing he’s given more of the story than he wanted to.
That they know it’s serious — dead fucking serious for him, actually — and that you’re his neighbor.
Yeah, he didn’t believe it either until you said yes.
“What?” Levi asks. “Something wrong?”
“No, that was just fucking smooth, dude,” Hange whistles low, impressed. “Pop-a-button-and-open-a-window kinda smooth. Holy shit.” They thumb towards Erwin. “You teach him to talk like that!?”
“Self-taught, I’m afraid,” Erwin hums. “Can’t take the credit.”
Hange flops back into their chair unceremoniously. “Jeeeez.”
“Six floors down, then?”
There’s a rare tint of pride in Erwin’s tone, like there’s a joke somewhere in that question he isn’t saying. 
Levi immediately narrows his eyes.
“Yeah. She’s been my fuckin’ neighbor all this time, if you can believe that.”
He sure as hell can’t. The fact that you’re six floors away — have been — has kept him up at night.
He could run down there right now and show you off to his friends.
He could leave you home-cooked meals if you’re running behind at your office job.
He could do a lot of things, but—
“Is she requesting you to end your time at Scout Services?” Erwin asks, interrupting his trailing thoughts.
Levi’s stormy eyes meet a contemplative, oceanic stare.
“...no.”
A beat passes.
Despite his trepidation, he explains himself.
“She’s not asking me to quit it. Says she gets it, a job’s a job, but I don’t know how true that’ll be in the long run.”
“And you believe her?”
He knows Erwin’s skepticism isn’t unfounded, but it sets a fire in his belly.
Questioning you, the newfound gravity keeping him grounded on planet earth.
(You're just a stranger to him, too, at the end of the day, but you don't feel like one. Not really.)
“I can’t expect anyone to stay neutral about what the fuck it is we do, Erwin," he reasons diplomatically. "I can say everything on my mind and put it on paper, but I’m sure the doubt will still creep in. Everything’s too new to tell. It won’t be easy, but it…”
He sighs, running his hand once more through his straight-and-narrow black hair. 
“I just need you two dumbasses to keep me in check. I can’t—”
Hange frowns, and he hates the sympathetic tone they take when they say his name. 
“Levi—”
“Four Eyes,” Levi interrupts stronger yet weaker in resolve, effectively shutting down their protest, “I can’t fuck this up. So don’t let me.”
The air grows thick, like winding vines corrupting the foundation of a tree.
Levi glances between the two of them, nostrils flaring with unspoken difficulty.
Erwin is the first to nod. Wordlessly, but he does.
Hange sighs with conclusion not a second after and nods, too.
“Am I at least allowed to ask one thing?” they chirp, holding out one slender finger to the sky. “Just one teeny, tiny thing — yes or no.”
A part of him really wants to say no.
A part of him really wants to say this conversation is over before he gives them anymore concrete information about you as he navigates these uncharted waters of being a not-so-normal boyfriend to a very-normal-ass person.
He fights.
Fails.
“...fine,” he grumbles. “The fuck’s the question?”
Hange perks up, all too smug.
“Did the pop-up shop six floors up line work?”
The memory blossoms in the back of his skull.
His body warms as if trapped under an electric blanket, heat setting cranked a little too high. 
Instinctively his eyes flicker to the front door of his apartment.
Like you’ll burst in at any moment with your work bags and stress and the hope that he’ll have the same soothing balm you’ve gifted him, hands at the ready to fix your problems for you.
He hasn’t wanted much.
He’s never wanted much, but—
Shit, if he doesn’t want to be good to you.
“...something like that.”
.
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Author's Note:
AHHHH HI EVERYONE! WE'RE AT IT AGAIN WITH MODERN!LEVI SHENANIGANS! How are we feeling to be back?
I seriously cannot believe we're here. I've never done a sequel before, but the demand was overwhelming and I couldn't help but agree: we could do with learning what happens after the final call.
And we will, in this seven (maybe more?) part series. I had to actually break up part one because it got way too large of a chapter, so I promise we'll be picking up right where we left off in P4 -- like, quite literally That Fateful Night in part two.
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on-leatheredwings · 9 months ago
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Sleepover
Yandere! Damian Wayne x (Fem!) Reader
romantic > summary: During a sleepover, Damian makes his first foray into infatuation. > word count: 1605 > [ a/n: i just love writing from the yandere’s point of view! Damian is 19 or college-age here. honestly not much plot, just musings~ i will try to write from the Darling’s POV next time hehe.]
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This must be love.
“Wow, Damian… I’ve never noticed but your nails are so pretty,” you compliment, satisfied with the boy’s upkeep. Damian feels his heart thrumming against his ribcage. You are holding his hand. 
Not for the first time either, but the thrill never fades. 
If this had occurred a year ago, before Damian learned of how casual (generous, even!) you were physical affection, he might have dumbly stated, “You’re holding my hand.” Instead, he simply thinks it, on loop, in one long string. 
You’re holding my hand. You’re holding my hand. You’re holding my hand.
Unbeknownst to all this, you simply paint his forefinger with a stripe of green so dark it looks black. 
“If we’re going to do this, it’ll be by my rules,” he had said. 
In reality, if you needled him any harder, he would’ve accepted pink nails with glitter on them. Who cares? There wasn’t anyone who dared to make fun of him at school. Not to mention, it’d be obvious to everyone that you painted them. You'd be marking him as yours, essentially. And at night… well, Robin wears gloves.
“Hn. How so?” Damian asks with feigned coolness. Mainly because he wants to hear you praise him. In your hushed, awed voice. When he dreams, you often sound like that. (And he quickly pushes that thought away.)
You look at him pointedly, grinning. Oh, he’s not so slick. You acquiesce to his whims anyway.
“Your cuticles are impeccable and your nails are finely trimmed… I’m impressed. Don’t you do martial arts, too? Crazy they aren’t more dinged up.”
Martial arts. That was supposed to explain his abnormal strength and fighting capability, the one time you saw him nearly break a man’s wrist for trying to pickpocket you. 
You accepted the excuse with only a little suspicion.
“It’s simple grooming.”
A catlike grin forms on your face. “Hm~ I don’t knowwww… Seems like you may be trying to catch the eye of a girl – you know, girls look at stuff like that.”
Damian frowns. 
He’s infatuated but not delusional. He’s aware this ‘sleepover’ is pretty platonic on your end. After nails, it’ll be skin care. Maybe you’ll even do your makeup and take goofy pictures with him. You’ll laugh and platonically huddle against him during a movie. You may doze off on his shoulder while he’ll be committing your every dewy, moisturized pore to memory. 
Because of Damian’s (self-admitted) social awkwardness with your peers, you think that gives you some sort of elder sibling-esque edge on him. You are the social butterfly, leading a naive, but well-meaning social pariah through the perils of young adult life. You don’t know you are so much more naive than he is, and he adores that.
Rather than addressing the question, he snorts. “When are you going to turn on the movie?”
You hum, completing his nail’s first coat. “Oh yeah, that’s right!” You grab the remote and press play. You continue painting, gingerly admiring his long, golden brown digits. Damian preens at the attention. 
As the movie plays, you pause often to look up and gape at the screen. It’s a horror flick, and boasts an abundance of cartoonish gore. While a bit more sensational than something he’d put on, he likes your dark taste. An annoying teenager gets their head hacked off with a chainsaw. You laugh and Damian feels his heart sing. 
There’s a chime that rings through Wayne Manor, and he has to bite back a groan.
“Pizza’s here!” you cheer. You begin to get up when Damian whips out his card in an instant. 
“I’ll pay.” To his delight, you gape in surprise, cheeks warming. 
“Oh… Thanks, Damian!” You never quite get used to him paying for things, but you at least know by now not to argue. You grab his credit card and – thank God – your fingers brush against each other. It sends the most pleasant trill down his spine. “Since you’re paying, I’ll go bring it! I won’t be long.”
A corner of his lips quirk. “I’ll be pleasantly surprised if it gets back to this room at all.” You stick out your tongue on the way out.
As soon as he hears your footsteps disappear down the hall – such clumsy, loud steps – Damian’s attention falls to the messenger bag you threw to the ground of his bedroom. He knows your diary is in there. (In his mind, he can hear you protest, It’s a journal!)
He’ll be quick. He flips open to a random page, and he already is laughing at your writing style. There’s little care for capitalizing letters and full of what you explained are “emoticons”, despite being handwritten. He flips to today’s entry, half-finished.
February 01. 
there’s a guy in class who’s pretty cute… one may even say HOT xP
Damian’s jaw tightens. He knows exactly who you’re talking about, and he won’t allow that neanderthal anywhere near you. At least, not again. Yesterday, you told him that your crush had smiled at you. Brushed fingers with you when passing papers. In the only class you have without Damian.
(Also, “your crush,” he scoffs. What a juvenile concept. You and Damian share something much deeper. His feelings for you are not so trivial.)
The semester is still young. Damian can pull any string to land himself in your anthropology class.
The rest of your entry for today (and the past days prior) isn’t anything notable except for when he’s mentioned. 
stressful day, but at least i have tonight with damian to cheer me up. he’s seriously the best …. i should tell him more often !!! (but it’d give him an even bigger head)
He doesn’t even attempt to stop the smile splitting his face. 
Damian’s keen hearing catches you striking up a conversation with Alfred in the kitchen. Despite your promise, he knows you will, indeed, take long. You love talking to everyone, even in passing. It’s an admirable quality, and one he envies.
He unlocks your phone and rifles through some messages of yours. He uses his own phone for documentation purposes. What else is there to do… He spies your jacket on his bed.
There is a shameful thought and Damian’s heart skips a beat. It is… frankly, it’s humiliating as a concept. Yet he’s enticed. It’s your jacket, after all. He brings it to his face delicately and inhales, almost shyly. Once he catches the familiar scent of your body wash, however, he allows himself to breathe it in. After being lost in it for a few seconds, he rips it away. 
Only to see his father standing in his doorframe. 
He knows what this looks like. Damian knows what this looks like. After years of working with the man, Damian can hear his thoughts as if they were his own, as they happen. 
Damian just smelled your clothes. Even if it was investigative in nature, he could’ve retrieved a sample some other way. Someone’s personal journal is open on the floor. A phone that he knows is not Damian’s is unlocked and displaying text messages. All these things are splayed out in a circle around him. It’s uncharacteristically messy of him, as well. Damian’s own phone is actively on his camera. Was he taking pictures? And most notable is the absence of you.
In summary? Damian must have some interest in you. And by this sloppy job, it’s quite emotionally charged. And at his age, it’s likely romantic.
Damian’s skin rises to what feels like a boiling heat. What is Father going to say? He can’t stop him – he can’t. Damian doesn’t even want to talk about it, let alone be reprimanded. A feral need to escape bubbles underneath his skin. Despite the panic, he channels years of League training and hardens himself. 
Bruce watches his son’s expression morph from dazed, to fearful, to steel, in real time. From Damian’s seat on the floor he offers his father only silent defiance. Bruce knows his son, his darker needs that stem from his cruel childhood. And perhaps he should’ve expected this to happen someday. Bruce exhales, eyes closing. When they reopen, his slate-grey eyes are firm and hard. 
“No one gets hurt.”
And by that, Bruce means no one dies. Because Bruce and Damian are Batman and Robin – they’re all in the business of hurting people. People who deserve it, yes, but it’s still hurt. Pain.
Damian feels immense relief. He wouldn’t have killed his father – he’s not that boy anymore. But a life without you seems similarly unbearable. Damian feels… shaken. He doesn’t know what he would’ve done. He also feels grateful, that it didn’t turn out any other way. 
His eyes drop to the jacket he holds in a fist.
“... Yes. Thank you, Father.” Bruce’s gaze lingers, but he leaves wordlessly.
This encounter reminds Damian of who he is. He is a detective, vigilante, assassin, and creature of stealth. He can’t be this careless, even if he knows you won’t notice. 
Damian returns your belongings to their place, exactly how you left it. Diary back in your bag, jacket to where you were lounging, your phone underneath a pillow, because you carelessly tossed it aside. You’ll inevitably begin to look for it and he’ll grin once he places it in your hand.
You finally return to his room, two pizza boxes of deluxe cheese (for him) and pepperoni (for you) in your arms. You laugh sheepishly. 
“Sorry for the wait, Dami.” His heart skitters at the nickname.
“It’s fine.” Your eyes glitter with excitement and optimism and purity. He finds it hard to look away, you raining down a gaze like that upon him.
“I was waiting for you.”
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juletheghoul · 2 months ago
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covetous
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a/n: Jesus Maggie, you really called me out on my bullshit for this one. Originally I want this story to just be a bunch of sexy encounters in a morally questionable world, now we're talking about feelings and love and how the hell did we get here? (This is how I would imagine him the first time he sees his Girl) Please enjoy this un-beta'd, barely edited request. All mistake and errors are mine! please enjoy
Warnings; 18+ no minors, Marcus pov, vague but big-legal age gap, there's no actual sex, but memories of it, vulgar yet romantic musings, master / slave dynamic (power imbalance) he’s still pretty possessive, Marcus calls reader Girl, reader calls Marcus Dominus - let me know if I missed any!
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Pairing: Marcus Acaciusx F!Reader
word count: 1.1k (😅)
reblogs are appreciated
Masterlist series masterlist
War is easy. It’s a language he’s fluent in, something he excels in. He is blessed enough to have survived more battles that he could count and has been more than rewarded for his prowess. Battle plans, marches and military strategy are almost second nature, the fury, the heat of battle, all that he can anticipate and it’s probably the main reason he’s come this far in his life. 
Soldiers, camp life and brutality, those things are easy for him to understand.
Other matters, love, affection, attraction; these things are…harder. 
Physically, he’s perfectly adequate. He's never been ignorant to his looks, or his build. He knows that he fills the societal ideal for a man. He’s broad, he’s strong, he has a good face and no physical flaws.
He’s never been short of attention from the fairer sex either but that doesn’t mean anything as far as he’s concerned. He’s had his trysts, and he thinks he might have even been in love before but his luck seems to stop, and stay within his vocation. 
In his younger days, he’d broken his fair share of hearts, he’d been gifted the virtue of many a virgin in hopes of tempting him into a marriage. None of them had held his attention for more than that one night, and sometimes, in the late hours wherever he found his rest he secretly feared the Gods might be punishing him. Withholding the partner he hopes to find as payment for those broken hearts left in his wake. 
As he grew older, wiser and more practical he learned to ignore that little emptiness. He saw it more as a blessing. Would he be where he was now with a woman waiting for him? Would he have hit his station with children bearing his name pulling at his thoughts in the middle of battle? Perhaps the Gods had simply made a trade. His life, or his heart. 
He’d been content with his lot in life, until he’d seen her. 
She’d served at a gathering he’d been loath to attend. His eyes tracked her, the shine of her hair, the curve of her hip, her pretty smile. Her eyes had locked with his for half a heartbeat and he’d felt it in his belly. A rolling, like waves in a stormy ocean. 
She’d gone about her business, efficiently fulfilling her duties while the guests all spoke animatedly around him. He’d joined in after reigning in his reaction, but she’d taken every ounce of his attention with her. 
He’d negotiated her purchase the next day. 
-
She was quick. She learned everything faster than a lot of the others in his service, and she seemed to anticipate his needs before he spoke them. Most of the time, he barely needed to say anything at all, and so he kept quiet. Kept his thoughts, and his feelings to himself. 
His biggest need though, was her. He wanted her bad enough to hurt, to ache.
He was well aware of the practices in other houses. Slaves were there to obey, and in most houses that meant obeying with work, and with their bodies. He saw no issue in this, it was the way of the world. No matter how badly he wanted her though, he couldn’t make himself order her to spread her legs for him. Maybe it was a foolish, childish thing but he wanted her to crave it just as he did. He wanted her wet, he wanted her begging for him, he wanted to see pleasure and lust on her pretty face. 
He wanted her to want him. 
A year passed, and every second in her presence was exquisite torture. A torture he submitted himself to freely and with a perverse pleasure. It was a test of endurance, until the fateful night she’d come to him with her wet tunic, all of her body on display through the sheer fabric. The shadow of her cunt had sent him into a frenzy and when she’d come back and caught him fucking his fist he’d thought it was just another form of punishment. 
It was that look on her face though, that heavy lidded, open mouthed way she stared at him, nipples hardening that had finally made him crack. 
That first night he’d taken her, he’d stayed up in his bed, almost blinded with want. Her body had not alleviated the craving for her, if anything, it’d only made it worse. He’d replayed their encounter over and over, obsessed with the taste of her on his fingers, obsessed with the feel of her lips on his. From then on, she’d only cemented her hold on him. Her quiet obedience, her subtle seduction, the way she’d managed to scrape the shape of herself onto his brain.
She’d made herself the figurehead in his mind, the holy place at which he prayed, the Goddess he served. If he could, he’d light a thousand candles at the altar of her cunt, and pray to them daily.
He fought harder to return to her, he took note of her wants, of her preferences, and made sure to cater to her, despite no one in the house, not even her realizing. He dismissed the younger boys that lusted after her, he was covetous of her to the point of violence. A small smile from her could dictate his mood. The thought of her in pain made him feel like some feral wolf caught in a trap, ready and willing to chew part of himself away to reach her. 
Sometimes, after he’d spilled inside her, he’d let her fall asleep in his bed and relish the way she clung to him in her sleep. It was a double edged sword though, their stations in this life. A part of him fears that her want is only an act, a way to endear herself to him, her Dominus. A foundation to earn her freedom, or coin, or influence through him but then he sees the shy way she smiles at him and his fears are silenced to nothing. 
She cannot fake the way she flutters around his cock, she cannot pretend to feel nothing, not when he sees the same jealousy he feels shining through her eyes at the mention of the mostly political proposals he’s denied. The things she says, the way she takes her pleasure from him, all of these things only compound his delusions that just maybe, she feels for him a fraction of what he feels for her. 
It’s a sort of madness, truly, how that part of him that was the perpetual soldier had in so many respects switched their roles, had given her a control–a power he was sure she didn’t realize she had. 
He was sick with want for her, ravenous, and yet unable to soften himself in a way that would make her see the truth, make her see just how much she truly meant to him. He couldn’t make himself show her, that whatever she asked of him, he’d do with a smile.
For now at least. 
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kissnpunch · 1 year ago
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guapoduo's love makes me crazy, they fight for fun, what happen today make their chemistry stronger because how you explain to fight with the love of your life, a soulmate, in a playful way and know they have the mind and force to kill eachother but they wouldn't do it.
i said it before, hate is not something they feel for each other, they can't, they even feel more attracted by that fact.
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whiskeyskin · 5 months ago
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This
Premise: Astarion begins to understand how hellish it is catching feels.
• Astarion x afab!Tav • 18+ • M rating • MDNI
Astarion's POV, reference to blood feeding, warmth and comfort, hating the fact he's falling, light PinV, lotus pose, sensual, romantic, playful, past trauma's getting in the gods damned way, reliving bad memories, understand, love, deciding not to have sex, feels
2.6k words
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Thank you to @casualya for this beautiful picture 😍💜
•°•°•
Astarion gasped, his mouth and throat coated in their delicious blood. So decatent, so warming and sweet. He felt intoxicated by it. A smile curled across his lips, still breathing heavily, mouth open.
"Can you taste the whiskey?" Tav asked, through a murmur of light-headedness and amusement.
Astarion hummed in appreciation against their soft, taut skin. He adored the way they smelled after he fed. Like warm lust, soft bedding and comfort on a rainy day.
He hated it.
Especially when they softly rubbed his back in soothing circles, making his resolve wane further.
His eyelids drooped as he slowly blinked against the lulling feeling of being with them like this. Naked and intimate but with no immediate threat of sex.
"I can," he licked his lips, catching drops of their taste in the creases of his mouth, "Is that why you taste especially warming tonight, my dear?"
He lazily dragged his tongue over the two slowly oozing pierce marks; the evidence of his condition inflicted on another.
Tav shuddered and grazed the back of his neck to lightly fist and twirl his hair. Astarion grasped the Amulet of Silvanus around his neck, muttered the incantation and the tent flooded with blue healing energy.
Tav's naked chest pressed against his own as they inhaled deeply, carried by the spell's energy. They sighed out and peppered kisses against his forehead to the side of his cheek, their skin now feeling similar temperature, instead of his usual cool against their warmth.
There they sat, facing each other in relaxed embrace, Tav's splayed legs hooked over his own. The rhythm of Tav's breathing a sweet lullaby as he closed his eyes, leaning his temple against theirs in complete bliss.
It was awful.
All he'd wanted was a little promise of protection. For them to fall for his manipulations and honeyed words. To use his extraordinary talents and devastating good looks to his own advantage for a little tet au tet. Sex for protection.
Not this. Not kindness and understanding. Not feeling rested and nurtured and important. Feeling safe, truly safe with them. With all of their tadpoled rabble, in fact.
He could feel the warmth radiating off their core as they sat like this, the blood he'd drained from them headed only one possible place.
He could smell them. The allure of their sex. Their want and need for him. Their siren's call to sheath himself fully inside them. But with Tav, there was the safety of knowing that it need not go any further than this, unless he wanted it.
While they didn't understand the full severity of his complicated relationship with sex, they were acutely aware of it and always insisted on his unabashed consent and when it wasn't, they'd simply dressed themself, said goodnight and left for their tent.
It had left him flabbergasted.
That was the most erotic part of sex with Tav for him. The he had that power. That control to say "No" and they would obey.. listen.. allow it.
He wouldn't be forced to go through with it. Wouldn't be compelled to do it. Wouldn't do it to avoid lashings. They would simply get dressed and leave for their own bunk.
However that stint ended the first night Tav had suggested to sit like this together while feeding, for the sake of intimacy; completely naked, with no sex at all. They'd walked out of tent without a word, leaving him unexpectedly frustrated.
He'd riled himself wild the rest of the next adventuring day with the notion of fucking with free-will, that they'd been fucking every night since in some fashion, or another.
The freedom to have sex only, and if only, he wanted to but to still have the electricity of the warm up act? He could feel himself growing harder with the thought.
"Should I ignore it?" Tav whispered against the shell of his ear.
Astarion swallowed, traces amounts of the blood still present. He pulled them even closer, the head of his cock jutting against their swollen lips. Tav made a small gasp, then he felt a small smile against his skin before a kiss was pressed there.
"Tell me we don't have to.." he started, and fanned his fingers out across their back.
"Never. We never have to do anything unless you want to." Tav answered, shaking their head softly.
Astarion's eyes fluttered closed, "Tell me you'll leave if I asked you to." He said, trying to suppress a moan, as his fingers dug against the musculature of their back.
"Without question." They replied. Astarion squeezed his eyes shut tighter and bit his lip.
This. This was something he'd never had. Freedom to say no.
He'd hadn't experienced this, not in over 200 years. Someone who respected his choices, his opinions. Someone who empowered him to take chances in his own abilities, to find confidence in new skills. Someone that he found himself searching for in a crowded place. Someone that openly gave themselves to him without expecting anything in return. Someone who he.. cared for.
Gods below.
"Do you want me to leave?" Tav asked, their tone non-threatening and understanding.
Astarion shook his head and pressed his face into the crook of their neck - his safe place, his haven.
It was Hell.
He pulled them even closer, the bedroll unbunching as he lifted them higher on his thighs and spread their sweet lips apart.
His hard length glided from their clit to their entrance and gently prodded, their hole twitched against the intrusion then relaxed.
Tav breathed a moan and leaned back their head, exposing their neck to him again. Both of them began to writhe with miniscule movement, rocking against each other.
His cock butted from the position he'd tried to suavely place himself in and slid wetly up the length of their vulva.
They chuckled breathless and contented, "Why does sex never go as smoothly as it does in novels and verse?" Tav mused, tilting their head in amusement.
He softly snorted a laugh and burned the brand of his kiss against their clavicle, then smirked out the side of his mouth, "Indeed, my love. I need a little help it seems."
He gently thrust upwards, his cock gliding against their pink, glistening lips, so they would understand what he meant.
"Picking at the lock but need an extra hand to open it?" Tav laughed softly, reaching between them to gently push his length into the correct angle for this position. Astarion flexed his thighs to afford more space and lift them higher.
Their wet folds made deliciously slick noises as his cock slid into place and his head was engulfed by their tight entrance.
They both gasped, their breath mingling as they moaned together. Tav bit their lip and gently rolled their hips to tease his tip, to sucker and release as he barely entered them.
Suddenly, he was plagued with his well practised, tired and loathsome feeling of revulsion and hatred. He tried to push it back, to contain it to the subconscious part of his brain.
He pulled himself back, to look down at the sensation. A low twang of lust to hit in his belly watching the head of his cock disappearing into their waiting vagina, massaging and teasing him.
Tav's hand was resting on his lower abdomen to keep him in place, the other wrapped around his neck.
"You feel so good, my darling."
Tav smiled seductively, but said nothing.
Again, the feeling of revulsion reared up inside him, filling his throat with bile. He shook his head against it, snorting breath through his nose.
"Tell me it feels good, Tav."
"Always, Star."
Tav slid their hand from the back of his neck to delicately capture his jaw, feather light and soft. He leaned in desperately, folding in on himself to get closer.
He was taken back to the palace, to that bedroom.. to the hundreds of faceless underneath, or on top of him.
He gritted his teeth, and strained against it. He blinked back the visions, willing himself through it. He just needed to get through it and everything would be fine. He just needed to find another way through it than his usual routine of disgust and revulsion at what he was doing.
It wasn't a victim, not another body to appease Him. It was Tav. It was..
"We can stop-" came Tav's voice, concern tinged their tone.
"-No," he protested, "Don't you dare." He warned with a devilish snarl, kissing them deeply, tongue lashing with theirs.
He wouldn't be beaten by it. Wouldn't let Cazador keep ruining his life.
Astarion gripped then curve of Tav's ass to pull them toward him, to make them full with his cock but they dug in their heels to stop him.
"Wait, let me.." they trailed off, leaning themselves backwards with one arm to give then leverage.
They rolled their hips upwards in languid circles, using their strength to hold themselves up higher.
Astarion stared down at their meeting. His pale purple head dipping shallowly into their hot, pink cunt. Their combined slick glistening as his tip reappeared from their entrance. He almost swallowed his own tongue.
He never looked at it before Tav. Where the sexes met. It disgusted him. Why would he. He would always look away, or look between the mark's eyebrows. Never in the eyes and never watched how bodies moved with him.
"It's beautiful, isn't it? How I envelope around you, welcome you inside me?"
"Y-yes.. my d-darling," Astarion struggled, feeling his cock thicken as he stared down at Tav's inviting folds.
It felt like he was being choked from desire as the feeling sent electricity through his hips and down to his toes. The slow, deliberate friction suckering against his most sensitive part.
However, despite his efforts, the elation was soon tainted by nausea and self-loathing.
Gods he wanted to be normal. To experience and enjoy sex the way you're supposed to. To have the ability to relish in the delights of the carnal, not to be repulsed by them.
He wanted it desperately. Almost as much he wanted Cazador dead. He wished he could give himself fully without the baggage and hurt and trauma he carried.
They deserved more than him. Deserved to be with someone that could make them truly happy. That didn't come with emotional scars that dug so deep they'd never fully heal.
What could he possibly have to offer, except his exceptional ability in bed?
He wrapped an arm around Tav to help take the weight and slid them down his cock another inch, to envelop his tip completely.
Tav whimpered and bit their bottom lip.
Pleasure clenched low in his gut and Astarion moaned, and sought out their nipple to suck and bite on. Something tangible, something physical. To keep him present, to keep him centred. Something to show his affection for them, how they made him feel, what they were doing to him; despite his past creating road blocks.
Tav gasped and heaved their chest upward, legs splaying further. Astarion bucked in rhythm to add to motion.
"I adore watching you like this. Spread for me. Moaning just for me.."
It was true. He did. He just desperately wished that the act itself wasn't marred by sickening, cloying hatred.
He was so conflicted. He understood that this was different; the feelings when he was with Tav were unlike anything he'd experienced for those torturous decades, but the other darker side of himself refused to relent it's vice-like grip.
"I'm very happy for you, Star but I'm going to get a cramp if I don't move." Tav chuckled, resting themself back down onto the bedroll, his cock popped out and now felt cold from the lack of warmth.
"Well, can't very well have that, can we?" He mocked with a true playfulness only they brought out in him, "Shall we change positions in a very sexy and alluring manner, my dear?"
"Oh, not our usual tangle of limbs and curse words that come from us trying to extracate ourselves?"
"Perish the thought. I'm a consummate professional."
"Professional bastard."
"That too."
They giggled softly within each others embrace, then pressed a familiar kiss. Astarion lingered just a second longer than they did before Tav scooched themselves back and stretched out their legs, groaning.
"Ugh, I swear this adventuring lark is tough on the old bones." They complained, impersonating an elder in the warbling tone.
"Your bones are hardly old, mine are far older than yours."
"Your bones are also Elven and Vampiric, and therefore immortal. So yank those reigns, Grandfather." They sassed, pointing and flexing their feet, stretching out their legs. Astarion gave a genuine laugh.
His chest ached. He didn't know why. It was a dull, throbbing ache that seeped warmth into the deep reccesses of his soul.
His brows creased together at the odd sensation and swallowed, embracing it. At least it was different to self-loathing. It was calming but made his body feel like it was struggling for air. He recognised it.. vaguely.. from his early years of enslavement.
Guilt poured over him, dousing the warmth gathered in his chest. Reliving the scant moments of connection and the internal conflict that followed, the fear of disobeying, the desperation of attempted escapes.. the darkness.
"You alright, Star darling? Looking a little peaky, even more peaky than your usual snow white self." They flexed their eyebrows at him with a smirk.
He swallowed, "Oh, yes. I'm fine." His answer was automatic.
Tav's brow twitched, "What is it?" Their tone was soft, light but with a pull of seriousness. Astarion swallowed again, gazing at them, reclined and comfortably naked, in the amber glow of the candlelight.
He couldn't talk about this. Not now. Not yet. He wasn't ready. Not here.. when the world seemed so far away. He had to keep it out. Keep Him out. He wanted to stay in this bubble with them. Inside his tent, in their small patch of nowhere. Not yet. Don't take them away yet.
"Hey, hey.. talk to me. You're worrying me now." They leaned up to grip him arms but stopped short - a gesture toward his dislike of being touched when these memories overcame him.
Gods. Why were they so nice to him?
"Absolutely nothing. But are you alright, my dear?" He asked, trying to deflect, "Are we tired? Does the poor, frail human need their rest?" He taunted with a babied voice, lightly pinching at their soft thighs.
"I will end you if you don't stop jiggling my thighs." They threatened emptily, with a grin and a raised brow.
"Beautiful thighs," he objected, shuffling closer to them and pulling them back into him, "I often get lost in thoughts of losing myself between those thighs." He flashed them a dangerous look, shielding them from the horrors beneath.
He just wanted to return to their previous engaged activity; he wouldn't let his past win.
He wanted to bury himself deep within them and paint their walls. Claim them. He wanted to stay inside them as they lay in the afterglow, warming his cock and keeping his seed pressed within.
But at the same time, he wanted none of that.. because it was all tainted. Even though it was with Tav. It still.. hurt.
He palmed the curve of their hips beneath the splay of his hands, up to their waist and down the cup of their behind. He took the meat of their thigh and brought it to his mouth. He sucked and kissed at their smooth skin.
"And I have also fantasied about you between my legs." They admitted, as nonchalantly as if they were discussing the weather, "whether it's your cock, or your mouth. It doesn't matter which. Although, when it's your mouth, it shuts you up for a while, so that's a massive boon." They smirked, as Astarion caught up with the joke quickly and squeezed at their soft flesh to tickle them.
They writhed and laughed together, as Tav protested between cackles, while he dared them to repeat.
Breathless from enjoyment and glee, they laid back, settled into each others arms. The last titters rumbling, as they coiled limbs around each other.
Several moments of silence passed easily around them. Tav's breathing soothing him once more, bringing him back to the calm, chasing away all thoughts of his tormented past.
"I do adore laying with you like this, when it's just us and.. it's just us." A quiver strained his voice, a strange gripping sensation held his chest and threatened to surge outward but he caught the feeling and held it tightly before it overcame him.
Gods, not this level of Hell again.
"Mm, me too." They whispered, gently stroking his forearm.
A few more wordless moments passed before them, "Star, is it alright if we don't have sex tonight?"
Astarion's head jerked, an oxymoronic wave of relief, surprise and disappointment tumbling over him, "Of course, if that's what you want?" He propped himself up on his elbow.
They nodded, scrunching up their nose, "It is, yeah. I'm quite sore and bruised. Apparently Silvanus' blessing doesn't extend to aching bones and tender vaginas," They shot out a giggle together, "I'm not used to having sex every night. It's a lot for me," They made an uneasy face, "It's why I wasn't letting you in any further than the tip, if I'm being completely honest. Are you disappointed?"
"Well, naturally I am a little.. but.. well.." He looked into their warm eyes, and it's glow radiated into him, "If we're being honest with each other; I'm a little relieved. I wouldn't mind a break."
"Oh, thank god." They breathed with a sigh of relief, smiling widely.
"You don't have to sound so elated." He teased, with faux indignation.
"No, no. It's not that. It's just.. I didn't want to come up short in the bedroom for you. I mean, you're used to a lot of sex and-"
"Darling," He stopped them with a hand, "Consent flows both ways, you know? If you're not feeling it, tell me for God's sake!"
Tav's unease dissolved in front of this eyes, "Thank you, love."
Tender fingers reached for his chin and he willingly followed them down for another sweet kiss.
"Also, you're not going to believe this but I was maybe doing the same with you. I didn't want to let down the fantasy of being with a Rakeish Vampire."
"So, we've both been competing with our own ego's and projected expectations, even though the other was feeling similarly?" Said Tav plainly, pointing out the irony.
Astarion nodded and Tav laughed without humour.
"Well, I suppose that's why they say communicating is key to a good relationship." They shrugged, giggling gently.
A relationship.
Is that what this was?
He'd not been in a "relationship" since well before his turning.
Was that what the warmth inside him had been trying to tell him? Had his cold, dead heart been beating during this time they'd spent together and he hadn't thought to notice it?
Had he developed.. feelings right under his own nose?
Gods below.
"What? You've gone all quiet and pensive again." They rubbed his shoulder to pull him from his stupor.
"I have?" He blinked.
"Yes, you do it a lot," They twirled a curl between their fingers and shaped it around his ear.
Suddenly his vision started to blur, and instead his mind was filled with their first time at the Tiefling party. They'd done exactly the same. He was still inside them, and therefore still dissociated from the event. They'd pulled him back by fixing a stray curl. He'd smiled in genuine affection at the motion.
And in the Crèche. They'd just finished the gruelling fight against the Inquisitor, the others had been looking for an escape away from the main entrance, where the Githyanki hoard waited. Tav had walked over to him to check on his wellbeing, and absent-mindedly stroked a blood-soaked curl out of his face.
And the Underdark. In the Sussur Grove. They'd told him how beautiful he looked bathed in the light of the magnificent arcane tree. That was the first time he'd kissed them. Truly kissed them. Without a plan, or manipulative word. He'd just wanted to kiss them. They'd threaded his hair around their fingers at the nape of his neck into a tight curl that he'd tried to keep pristine.
The gesture was so gentle, so miniscule, so innocuous, yet so monumentous to him; a simple thing that brought up not nightmares from his past, but treasured memories from their time together. Moments not drenched in hate and fear, but in adoration and affection.
"What is it you're thinking about with that particular facial expression, I wonder." They traced a faint scar on his shoulder, smiling up at him.
Gods, he wanted to say it. Could he say it? Was he even capable of it..
Eventually, he said, "I am used to a lot of sex but it's sex that I didn't want."
Tav paused, their eyes searched his face, and raised a hand to cup his cheek. He leaned into it like a cat rubbing against it's favourite human.
"I didn't have anything, not even my own body. I did as I was told for so long, I'd quite forgotten what it was like to want."
Astarion scrunched up his face, emotion from uncharted territory replacing the repugnant bile that once fought it's way out. He placed his hand on top of theirs and brought their palm to his mouth, pressing a firm, almost desperate kiss.
"This," he started, staring down at the person he'd willingly die for, "this is what I want."
Tav's eyes began to fill, as they pursed their lips over their smile to conceal it and failed miserably. They brought their other hand to his cheek and brushed away a tear he hadn't realised had fallen, thumbing another away with the other.
"I know. Me too."
They gently pulled him down to lay with them, wrapping arms and legs together, melted into each other.
They fit perfectly together; a practised position of theirs.
His favourite position of theirs.
Tav gently kissed his forehead and held him closer, twirling their favourite curl behind his ear. They soaked into each other, perfectly in-sync. Bodies and minds intertwined and existing in pure harmony and peace.
His haven. His safe place.
Shit.
•°•°•
Room for more? There's always time for more smut and sweetness 😜
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psychickiss · 1 year ago
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smile!
— saiki kusuo x reader (gn, 2nd pov)
— summary: Helping out Saiki has its perks—example, he smiles for a picture with you on what would look like a date to outsiders.
— notes: this was an old fic i posted from june! edited it a little and finally remembered to reup here :-)
— things: hmmmm i guess the reader's relationship with saiki is kind of romantic? but the overall dialogue and stuff is platonic :-)
— masterlist | request form
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When Saiki couldn’t go to Toritsuka for help, he’d approach you.
You weren’t explicitly aware of his powers, but you’ve had your suspicions. Though, it was something you never brought up in conversation with Saiki.
Whenever you do help Saiki out, you assure him that he isn’t in debt to you. This results in Saiki going out of his way to silently pay you back. He knows your words are true, but he wasn’t okay with a good deed going unrewarded.
Additionally, you were okay with doing just about anything. Help him stay away from the sports festival? Sure, you hated it too. Join the Occult club so there’s a not-so-annoying familiar face? Why not? The club seemed like it wouldn’t be too much work.
Talk to a guy from another class for Saiki? Okay.
You weren’t the best at starting a conversation, and neither was Satou Hiroshi. Why Saiki wants to know his interests, you didn’t bother asking. It wasn’t your business.
Opening a conversation with Satou wasn’t hard at all—you figured you could just lie on the spot. “Hi, Satou. Truth be told, I’ve been wanting to talk to you for a while. I want to make friends from every section, and I thought I’d talk to you.”
Satou looks up at you, surprised. “Me? But, I’m not as interesting as the other guys here... Like Toritsuka–”
You abruptly shake your head. “I’ve interacted enough with him. I’m good. But, you... You just have a calming presence, you know? Puts people at ease.”
Saiki, from afar, listens in on your conversation. You had suggested to be on call with him as you made conversation with Satou.
Listening in on your conversation with Satou was something Saiki could do without the help of technology, but you didn’t know that, so Saiki agreed. This made you one of the really few people in Saiki’s phone contacts.
You pull an empty chair near Satou and sit on it. “So, tell me, what do you like? Any favorite bands, drinks, stuff like that?”
Satou happily answers you. “One OK Rock! I love their songs! Ah, I drink a lot of peach tea, too.”
You smile at Satou. “Oh, that’s nice. Do you have any hobbies?”
“I like to read.”
You nod. Average hobby. I like to read too. Everyone likes reading to a certain degree. You then ask him, “Oh? What kind of stuff do you read?”
Satou hums. “Well, I read all kinds of books. I like to pick up a copy of Weekly Jump on Fridays; kind of a reward for getting through the week.”
“That’s so interesting...! Would you want to walk home with me later? That way, we could talk more.” You put your hand in your pocket, checking to see if your phone was still there. You proceed to stand up from the chair and put it back in its place.
Satou awkwardly laughs in response. “I’m sorry, but I have a few errands to do after school, I wouldn’t want to drag you around with me. Maybe some other time.”
You laugh back. “It’s alright. There’s no need for you to apologize! I’ll be on my way now. Good luck with class, Satou.”
“Thank you, you too.” Satou waves before walking away.
You take out your phone and hold it close to your ear. “So? Is that all?”
Saiki hums. “Yes. Thank you.”
“How are you going to get this week’s Jump? We aren’t allowed to leave schoolgrounds until classes are over.”
Saiki answers you, “I have my ways.”
You furrow your brows. “Alright... Why do you want to hang out with him, anyway? No offense, but he’s kind of... bland.”
“That’s exactly why I want to talk to him. Also, we can stop the call. I can see you walking towards me.”
You sigh and end the call, continuing your conversation with Saiki face-to-face. “Alright... And you’re sure he’ll talk to you?”
Saiki shrugs.
You reply flatly, “That’s reassuring. I’ll be at Café Mami if things go well, or not. The usual booth. I’ll just text you.”
I could use clairvoyance to find you, but that works.
...
You enter Café Mami, alone for the time being, and look for an empty booth. You spot one and head straight to it, setting your bag down. You text Saiki.
You:
Do you want coffee jelly?
Saiki:
👍🏼
You:
How’s it going with Satou?
Saiki:
I’m waiting for him by the gate. I have a copy of this week’s Jump with me, and I bought peach tea from the cafeteria.
You:
Okay. This means you’ll be going to Café Mami though, right?
Saiki:
I’m just going for the coffee jelly.
You smile at his message before closing your phone. Keep telling yourself that, Saiki.
The manager approaches you and takes your order; you order something for yourself, and two cups of coffee jelly for Saiki. One for him to eat here, and...
“The other coffee jelly is to-go, thank you.”
You open your phone again and search up the band Satou mentiond, One OK Rock. You rummage your bag for your earphones, but to your dismay, you couldn’t find it.
You quietly sigh to yourself. I guess... I’ll listen with my phone really close to my ear. God, I hope no one hears.
You choose a song and pleasantly listen to it. This actually isn’t so bad. Might add this to my playlist– the song stops. You check the notification.
Saiki:
Hello. I am on my way there.
You:
Take care. ♡
You see Saiki enter Café Mami, and your eyes dart towards the earphones he’s wearing. You point at it. “Those are mine! Where did you get those?”
Saiki sits down as he answers you, “Your bag.”
“You didn’t ask...!”
The manager approaches you two. “Here’s your order. The coffee jelly to-go will be served shortly.”
Saiki looks at you, confused about that last sentence.
“Ah, I ordered a second one for you to enjoy at home.”
Saiki’s eyes sparkle at your words.
You bring your order closer to you. “So, how did things go with Satou?”
Saiki slumps his shoulders and dejectedly hands you back your earphones. “I’ll be taking both coffee jellies to-go, thanks.”
Your voice was riddled with panic, “Huh–?! No, don’t go! Is it that bad?”
“He didn’t talk to me.”
You laugh. “That’s it? Did you even try to talk to him? You’re not the most chatty person I know.”
Saiki nods. “I had everything he liked; Weekly Jump, peach tea, and I was listening to One OK Rock. I even smiled at him.”
You hold back your laughter, you didn’t want Saiki to feel worse than he already did. “Maybe... Maybe he didn’t talk to you because he knew you stole my earphones.”
Irritated, Saiki replies, “That is totally unrelated”
You shrug. “Yeah.” You decide to tease him, “Maybe your smile was weird. Off-putting. I mean, you don’t smile a lot.”
Saiki shakes his head. “My smile wasn’t weird.”
“I’ll have to see for myself.”
“No.”
“You’re no fun.”
Saiki doesn’t reply to your comment, opting to finally eat the coffee jelly in front of him.
“Here’s the coffee jelly to-go. Your order’s complete. Thank you!”
You smile at the waiter and gently push the paper bag with the coffee jelly inside towards Saiki.
Hm... Maybe if he smiled at Satou like that, then they’d be hanging out like this. Ah, then I wouldn’t be able to see Saiki so happy. Perhaps I’ll be selfish, just this once.
Saiki thought to himself as he ate the coffee jelly. For someone who’s had their suspicions about my powers, you sure think rather shamelessly. You’ve done a lot for me, so I’ll let you have this.
Saiki finishes his coffee jelly. “Take out your phone.”
You do as told, although clueless to Saiki’s intentions. “Okay...?”
“I’ll show you the smile I gave to Satou.”
You move over in your seat so Saiki could sit beside you. He takes the hint and walks over to you.
You two smile and you snap a picture, the smile on your face still there as you examine it. Saiki returns to his seat.
You two were smiling, but you were the only one looking at the camera. You look up from your phone, then at Saiki. “Why were you looking at me?”
He’d then respond, “I wasn’t ready.” You looked happy.
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subcultureblues · 5 days ago
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Don’t You Want Me (Baby?) Pt 3
———
Steve and Eddie are either hooking up or dating - and are about as bad at keeping a secret as they are dealing with their feelings. (Dustin POV)
1 / 2 / 3 / 4
———
“I’ll be there in thirty!” Dustin said. He slammed the phone down and dashed to his room to round up his notes.
“Bye mom love you gotta go!” He shouted as he hustled out the door and jumped on his bike. Dustin had just made it out of the suburbs and into town when he spotted a familiar Maroon Beemer in the lot by the Quickie Mart.
Steve was standing beside his car in a fluorescent windbreaker, leaning on the open driver’s side door. He was staring at the bouquet of flowers in his hands like his nose was about to start bleeding.
Dustin slowed.
….He could probably spare a few minutes to see what the hell that was about.
Really, it’s been a while since Dustin made peace with the fact his curiosity would almost invariably get the best of him.
“Hey Steve!” Dustin hollared, dinging his bike bell a few times.
Steve startled, comically jerking to attention. As a thoroughbred jock, Steve could be ever so slightly air-headed at times. But that usually didn’t extend to a total lack of situational awareness.
Steve waved at Dustin as he approached.
“Why are you angry at those flowers?”
“What? I’m not - “ Steve cut himself off with a sigh. He shot the flowers another grimace. “I’m just trying to decide if I’m being a total idiot right now…”
Ah, Dustin realized. Must have pissed off Robin.
“What happened?”
“I fucked up, I think. And flowers, that’s my go-to right? That’s the move. But…” he tapped above his temple with the side of his fist - as if to dislodge the stupid. He rested it there for a second. “I can’t help but think I’m becoming totally neurotic.” He said, vaguely concerned.
“Girls like flowers.” Dustin offered a simple shrug.
“Yeah, girls do.” Steve agreed. Then sighed again, shaking his head.
Jesus, he must be gone bad.
And Dustin likes Robin. More importantly, he liked her for Steve, they were a perfect match. But most importantly of all - if Steve fucks this up, Dustin spends the next who knows how long listening to him complain about his endless strings of unfulfilling dates.
“And red roses? Can’t get more romantic than that, right?” He said, trying to sound encouraging.
“You don’t think they’re… I don’t know. Lame? Christ, what the hell am I even - I have no idea what I’m supposed to be doing here.” Steve said, sounding totally defeated. He dragged a hand through his hair, displacing his artfully styled do. And too distracted to even notice? Dustin was very nearly starting to get worried. “Never mind forget it. Just, forget I said anything…”
“Who even is this guy? Your Steve.” Dustin scoffed. “Legendary lady killer of Hawkins High. Remember? You’re great at this.”
““Yeah, that’s different though. I guess... I don’t know.”
“Different how?” Dustin demanded.
“How about because this is important. That’s how!” He said.
“Ok? That’s a good thing, Steve.” Dustin said, which even to his own ears sounded just a little bit demeaning. Maybe he did need to work on his tone…
“Is it? The last time I really thought there might be something there, it was Nancy. So of course, I manage to fuck the whole thing up. Because that’s my thing I guess.” He deflated. Then quietly, as though speaking to himself, he said. “Things were going so good too… I just had to start a stupid - “
He finally looked back up at Dustin. He closed his mouth and the far away look cleared. He shook his head, like was done thinking about it right now. Or at least done talking about it because he said,
“Henderson, what are you doing running around this early anyways?”
“Pft, what are you doing running around this early? You and Eddie. I’m surprised you’re not sleeping off your… illicit activities.”
Steve made a face. “No. Don’t call it that. I - we… called it an early night last night.”
“Figures. I’m headed to Eddie’s right now.”
“Ah...” He muttered to himself. He looked down at the flowers again and his shoulders wilted. Then he chucked them into the the passenger seat.
“Woah, man, careful with those.” Dustin scolded him.
“No, it’s fine. Look, I gotta go pick up Robin soon. We have a shift together later. See you around, man.”
Dustin frowned. Why were adults so goddamn weird? Is Dustin gonna start acting like this in a few years.
“Good luck.” Dustin offered, tilting his head optimistically. Steve just waved him off, still very obviously distracted.
“Yeah, I’ll figure something out.”
Dustin watched him climb into his car. Steve would figure it out. Dustin had faith in that, at least. He could have a thick skull, but give him enough time and eventually he got it together.
Steve drove off and Dustin started pedaling again, in the opposite direction, towards the Forest Hills trailer park.
Dustin was at the trailer almost till dinner time, fine tuning what will soon be the very first one shot, nay the very first D&D session Dustin will ever orchestrate. He can’t help violently oscillating between excited and nauseous, but Eddie’s advice genuinely did provide a solid foundation to work with.
Eddie even assured Dustin he’d act just as shocked as the rest of the party, gasping during the big moments. Stuff like that - even though he knew pretty much every story beat he had planned just from helping Dustin sort it all together.
They were just packing up to leave when the phone rang.
“Shit. Give me a sec. That’s probably Wayne.”
“He’s not at work?”
“A buddie’s house. He got the weekend off.” Eddie said, picking up the receiver.
“Munson’s Mortuary Services. You got the purse, we got the hearse. Are we picking up or dropping off, cause - ” Eddie cut out mid bit. He grimaced, looking back at Dustin. “I - uh, hey. Look this really isn’t a good - “
Dustin was only really half ease dropping as he tried to order his session notes correctly. Eddie was talking quietly for the first time in his life, holding the receiving close to his mouth, which was making it kind of difficult.
“No, it’s fine… I’m serious, it’s fine. Yeah, I’m sorry too…. Well, I was being an asshole. Look this really isn’t a good time…” Eddie glanced back over his shoulder at Dustin. Dustin tried to look busy. “Just, don’t worry about it, seriously…. Yeah. Sure, talk to you later, ok?” Eddie started to move the phone away before bringing it back to his ear.
“This week? I’m not sure… Maybe. I’ve just - I got a lot of stuff going on… I’ll call you… Yeah, bye.”
Eddie hung up, hand lingering on the phone for a long moment.
“Who was that?” Dustin asked, so casually it was probably immediately suspicious.
“Funny how you think I won’t make you walk home.” Eddie said, a bone dry threat. That roughly translated to, it was definitely totally my secret girlfriend. “Pack your shit, dude. I’m calling Wayne so you better be ready to go by the time I’m done.”
It seemed like Eddie took it to heart what Dustin said about them never hanging out anymore. That week, Eddie really seemed to be making an effort to start making time for him again.
And the rest of the party of course.
On Monday, Eddie suggested Hellfire (plus Max!) hit the arcade after school. He didn’t give them any quarters, but that was fine, they had enough loose change to have a good time. They’d just need to plan ahead and bring Steve next time.
After school on Tuesday, Dustin called to see if Eddie wanted to keep working on the one shot. Which he couldn’t cause Corroded Coffin had band practice.
So instead, he invited Dustin tag along. It came with the strict stipulation he kept his mouth shut, his ass glued to the couch, and he not try to touch anything, on pain of a swift and merciless death. But Dustin’s come to understand Eddie’s threats have a lot more to do with his penchant for dramatics than any honest hostility.
Eddie was just heading out the door when Dustin called so he said he’d come grab him from his place on the way to Jeff’s.
Dustin thought for a moment about changing out of his pun-derful shirt but ended up scrapping the idea for time.
He kind of regretted it when Eddie rolled up. Music loud and looking, as always, too cool for school. Summer was still fading, so he was wearing a loose, faded Cult shirt with the sleeves cut off. He had more tattoos than Dustin realized (all of them ugly.). There was a red flannel tied round his waist and he was wearing a thin leather bracelet.
Dustin couldn’t pull off a leather bracelet in a million billion years probably.
“Little mans sitting in on practice tonight.” Eddie announced as they walked into Jared’s garage. He got a scatter of hey’s and what’s up’s.
Dutifully, Dustin belined it for the couch. He sat next to the plastic Halloween skeleton that was already sitting there posed to watch (Dustin was introduced to him as Manny).
Eddie seemed to switch into DM mode, someone had to keep the boys focused and on track.
Dustin sat still and didn’t touch anything, which was easy enough.
But come on, their music was way too awesome for a passive listening experience.
Gareth, Jared, and Jeff seemed to appreciate his enthusiasm. Still, Dustin made sure to keep distractions to a minimum. A reasonable minimum, at least.
“God, you guys are just so - “ Dustin rambled. It had gotten dark outside and they were started to pack up their gear.
“Metal?” Eddie said, winding up his guitar chord with a smile.
“Metal as hell.” Dustin agreed, standing and walking over.
“We’ll make a public menace outta you yet.” Eddie said proudly.
“You can always bring the kid around more during practice.” Jeff said to Eddie. The rest of the band nodded around and shrugged.
“Actually having a live audience every once in a while couldn’t hurt.” Gareth said, nodding his head at Manny. Him and Jeff were dragging his drum kit back into the corner of the room.
“Yeah?” Dustin asked, grinning.
“Maybe you’ll pick up a thing or two.” Eddie grinned back, shoving at him a bit and fucking up Dustin’s hair.
“You’d teach me?” Dustin asked, swatting him away. Eddie shrugged easily.
“Oh man. That’d be so cool!” He said. “Maybe next time I could bring some of the other guys? Oh, and Steve could come too!”
Jared practically choked on his instant laughter.
“The King?” He said sarcastically. “Yeah, sure - you wanna bring King Steve here, to sit on the ratty couch in my garage and listen to us thrash around and scream for a few hours?”
“I dunno, could be pretty entertaining.” Gareth elbowed Jeff, nodding down towards Eddie. He was on his knees, focusing intently on tucking his Warlock away in its hardcase. Gareth leaned in closer and whispered. “He’s getting a little too cocky with those guitar solos, don’t you think? Could use a chance to play under pressure.”
“Oh, that does sound entertaining.” Jeff snickered, just as amused by the prospect.
“Can it.” Eddie said, without looking up.
“Eddie?” Dustin insisted, looking to his DM for backup. They were talking like Steve was gonna march in here and just start heckling. Or throwing tomatoes at them or something.
“Sorry kid, they’re right. He’d probably hate it.” Eddie shrugged.
“Come on, it’ll be cool! I could at least ask? You don’t know he’ll hate it.”
“Yeah, I’m sure Steve Harrington would think our heavy metal band is so totally cool.” Jared said flatly, as he leaned over to grab the handle on his bass amp.
“Hey. I saw a Metallica tape in his car the other day!” Dustin said to Jared. Jared’s eyebrows climbed, surprised. Maybe even a little impressed, though clearly too stubborn to admit it.
Dustin turned back to Eddie. He was still expecting him to come to Steve’s defense. But he stayed quiet, barely a part of the conversation. “Come on, I thought you two were friends now.” He accused.
“Sure, Harrington’s fine.” Eddie shrugged.
“Yeah he is.” Jeff muttered under his breath. Gareth puffed up with a badly contained laugh.
Eddie rolled his eyes.
“Right, you blow us all off to go to go smoke weed with him at the drive through, but he’s just fine.”
Jared, who had been bending over to put his amp against the wall, froze in place.
“No fucking way.” Gareth’s head shot up, his eyes blown wide. But it didn’t sound like he was pissed at Eddie for crossing party lines. Not with the massive, disbelieving grin on his face. “You and Harrington? You fucking took him to a drive through?”
“What movie was it?” Jeff shot out, equally delighted.
“Was it a scary movie?” Gareth said. They both scrambled out from behind the drum set, their task wholly forgotten.
“Guys.” Eddie huffed. “Fine. Yeah, ok, we went to go see a movie - So what?”
“And you just, what!? Forgot to mention it?”
“Sure!” Eddie grimaced. He shrugged defensively. “We just - caught a movie. It’s not a big deal.”
Gareth barked out a laugh. Like that, that right there, is the funniest thing Eddie’s ever said.
“Guys.” Jared looked at Jeff and Gareth pointedly, before glancing at Dustin.
“Sorry it’s just…” Jeff paused with his mouth open, incredulous. “Didn’t know you guys hang out now.” He finished. “Ya know, outside the whole - coparenting.”
“We don’t.” Eddie said, tensely.
Dustin frowned as he watched the guys continue to stow their shit. Gareth and Jeff went back to sorting out the drums. “Not a big - “ Gareth scoffed under his breath, shaking his head in disbelief.
The rest of the boys were struggling to contain shiteating grins and Eddie was just pretending not to notice.
Dustin had never known these guys to be such… jerks. Why would it be such a big deal if Eddie and Steve were friends?
Could it really be all because they’re just so - different? The idea of hard rocker Eddie kicking back with a jock even once was just patently absurd? Ridiculous enough they jump straight to teasing him for it?
Dustin’s frown deepened. For a bunch of freaks, that all seemed pretty judgmental.
These guys would come around on Steve. Seems like Dustin would just have to make sure of it.
On Thursday Eddie agreed to pick him up from school.
He was late of course, so Will, Mike, Lucas, and Max had all started towards home by then.
When he did roll into the parking lot, it was in a sweeping wave of orchestral heavy metal.
“Pick it up.” He said impatiently, as Dustin opened the door. Eddie evil eyed the school building while he turned down the music. “Don’t like being here any longer than I need to be outside D&D hours.”
Dustin hopped in. He had a VHS copy of Jaws in his hands. He had left it behind at Lucas’ like two weeks ago and promptly forgot about it. A week later Lucas brought it to school and Dustin had only just re-unearthed it from his locker today. It was daunting just thinking of the fees that were sure to be stacking up by now.
His only salvation was Steve. Who’s thankfully working today.
“I need to drop this off at the movie store and before you say no - “
“Sure.” Eddie said, already starting the van.
“I - that was easy.” Dustin sat back and relaxed against the seat.
Eddie kept his eyes on the road and shrugged.
“I was thinking about renting something anyways.”
They drove straight to Family Video. The door dinged as they walked in.
Robin was sitting behind the counter. Still focused on her crossword she said, “Hi, welcome to Family Video, can I help you find - Oh, hey guys.”
“Hi Robin!” Dustin said, walking up to the counter.
Eddie lingered by the displays. He traced a finger over one of the tapes on the shelf. “Harrington, here?” Eddie asked, inspecting the cover.
Robin rolled her eyes but she was smiling. “You just missed him. It was seriously slow today and he won rock/paper/scissors so - he clocked out early for the day.” Eddie hummed and put his hands in his jean pockets.
Dustin handed Robin his VHS tape.
“This is eight days late.” She frowned at the computer.
“So - “ Dustin said, thinking fast to distract her from errant thoughts of late fees. “how’d you like the flowers?”
“Flowers?” Robin scrunched up her nose at him.
“The flowers Steve got you?” Dustin blurted out before he clamped his mouth shut again. She squinted at him. Suspicious.
“What are you on about?”
Shit. Steve hadn’t got those for Robin had he?
“Nevermind.” Mayday-mayday. Pull up!
Hopefully Steve wasn’t too pissed at Dustin for letting that little detail slip. And Dustin could barely feel bad for blowing Steve’s cover because, what the hell Steve?
Robin’s lip twisted. She looked down her nose at him, regarding him uncharitably. He forced a smile as she stared him down for a moment longer. Then her face cleared. Raising her eyebrows innocently she turned back to the monitor.
“So about that fee. That’ll be five fourty-“
“Ok! I - “ Dustin hesitated. Sorry Steve - that was five dollars he really did not have. “I don’t know. I ran into him a few days ago. And he’d just bought a big thing of roses.” Dustin caved, shrugging and holding his palms up defensively.
“Ooooh.” Robin’s eyes crinkled with a warm smile and her gaze slid somewhere behind Dustin shoulder. Then quickly snapped back into place.
“Oh.” Robin said again. She looked baffled, like the implications of that just hit her and clearly didn’t sit with her right.
“Maybe they were for his mom? His parents are in town aren’t they.” Dustin offered.
“You know what? Yeah, that’s probably it.” Robin nodded vigorously. The poor, love struck girl just immediately latching onto the explanation.
“Nah.” Dustin turned around to look at Eddie. He was still feigning intense interest in that copy of An American Werewolf in London. “His mom is allergic to roses.”
“That doesn’t mean he - ” Robin scrambled. “Maybe he just… forgot, or something. I mean, you know Steve. Total ditz.”
He shrugged. “That’s fine isn’t it?”
“Yeah. I mean, yeah.” Robin said cautiously. She seemed confused more than anything.
Eddie said cooly, hands still in his pockets. A perfectly neutral smile on his face. “Steve’s a free agent, right? He’s free to play the field.”
Jeez, did Eddie have to be so blunt? What ever happened to letting a girl down easy?
“Uh…” Robin said, looking between the two of them uncomfortably. Like maybe she didn’t quite know the answer to that anymore but it was also something she really didn’t want to sort out in public.
Dustin honestly felt a little bit bad for her. Sure they both always say they’re not dating, but clearly she seemed none too thrilled at the idea of Steve going around giving another girl flowers.
Dustin had hoped with the way Steve was talking the other day, he had finally got his head out of his ass and was ready to go public and make them official.
“Hey, man, I’ll meet you in the car, yeah?”
“Sure.” Dustin said.
“Eddie - “ Robin said. Eddie looked over his shoulder, lingering half way out the door. Robin glanced at Dustin. “Uh. Bye.” She finished lamely.
He smiled at her. She didn’t smile back.
Robin went back to the computer. She worked in complete silence. Suddenly the thick clack of the keyboard and the low murmur of the movie on the screen in the corner were way louder. Her brow was set like it gets when she’s stuck on a troublesome crossword.
“Sorry.” Dustin said, his face twisting up with guilt.
Robin glanced side long at him.
“I can talk to him you know.” He said.
“Huh?”
“I can talk to Steve. He shouldn’t do that to you.”
“Jesus, for the last time. We - are not - dating.” Robin said through gritted teeth. She made a frustrated noise. “Do you have to be so… ergh, meddlesome.”
“I don’t know what you’re talking about?” He lied, taking a step back.
“You need to stay out of your friends love lives.”
Yeah well, how about Dustin stops meddling when his friends stop being so dumb about everything. Till then they’ll just have Dustin to thank for sorting out their messes.
Tag List : @reading-archieves @homoerotictangerine @bingbongsupremacy @aroseandherthorns-blog1 @wheneverfeasible @travelingtwentysomething @ineffable-monster-romancer @laughingphantoms @gregre369 @rawrx3ky-txt @thespaceantwhowrites @blcksh33p1987
@the-legal-shipper @maverickricky @i-amthepizzaman @pretend-theres-a-name-here @steddiefication @that-one-gay-crow @gleek4twd
@theintrovertedintrovert @tinyplanet95 @queercrisis2003 @awkwardgravity1 @stripey82
@sofadofax @midnightskeeper
@blurryjoji @estrellami-1 @caraspud @little-trash-ghost @finalmoondragon
@samsoble @depressed-freak13
199 notes · View notes
jaeyunverse · 1 year ago
Text
the 24-hour dating challenge
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pairing: park sunghoon x fem!reader
genres: fluff, crack, mutual pining, suggestive, best friends to lovers, influencer au
wc: 8145
warnings: profanity, hoon is a loser and down bad sawry, you can’t see the mutual pining but that’s a skill issue on my part bc i swear it’s there, fic is completely from sunghoon’s pov, this was supposed to be short and sweet but it got kinda spicy towards the end LMAOAO but nothing happens so dw!!
summary: being a famous youtuber isn’t easy, especially when you have to constantly come up with new ideas to keep your audience entertained. and this time, your viewers want you to date park sunghoon, your best friend of nearly a decade, for the entirety of 24 hours.
moodboard: one ☆ two
note: omg i didn’t think i would struggle w this oneshot but i lowkey did w the last part ☹️ i think it’s bc it has been a while since i raw dogged a fic HAHDHS anyway i hope the end doesn’t seem super abrupt and y’all enjoy! i would love to hear your thoughts + feedback :’)
inspiration: evelyn and fred (♡)
masterlist
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“Your followers want me to do what?” 
Sunghoon was positive he’d misheard you. However, part of him hoped you’d confirm the life-altering information you’d casually uttered without even bothering to look away from the TV screen.
“Hoon!” you exclaimed, your fingers aggressively moving about the gaming console. “Oh, my God, they’re coming after me! Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, FUCK—” you screeched— “Nonononono I can’t take them by myself! You testicle-guzzling cocksucker, why did you die when I needed you the most?!” 
Sunghoon watched you struggle warily. Your leg was bouncing with anxiety and your eyes were bulging out of their sockets. He wasn’t entirely sure you were breathing. Beads of sweat were clinging to your forehead, and your face was scrunched up in a weird, constipated expression. 
There was a good chance you’d utter fouler insults if he disturbed you while playing, but he couldn’t stop himself from broaching the subject. “Are we just going to pretend you didn’t say the thing you just said?” 
“The thing about you being a testicle-guzzling cocksucker?” you gritted. “No.”
Sunghoon rolled his eyes. “The thing about your followers wanting us to date for a video.” 
For a few moments, you didn’t deign to acknowledge him. Then, as if a switch inside you had flipped, you pulled the TV’s plug and turned to face him. “Would it be weird?” 
Wow. Okay, Sunghoon mused.��I think it would be a fantastic idea and a dream come true, but I don’t trust myself around you. Even as a mere friend.  
However, instead of voicing his thoughts, the boy simply shrugged. “I don’t know. We’ve been friends for several years now. I’m a regular on your YouTube channel and I think your fans are aware of the dynamics of our relationship. What do they mean when they say they want us to date? Physical intimacy aside, we already do everything couples do.” 
“I think they want us to be romantic,” you admitted. “Go on a date, hold hands, cross some lines.”
“Cross some lines?” Sunghoon raised an eyebrow, the corner of his lip curling in a smirk. “Is this you speaking or your subscribers?”
Groaning in exasperation, you shoved his shoulder. He fell back on the couch, laughing. “Shut up, dickface! You know I’ve been swamped this semester. My influencer gig has been seriously lacking. I need to step up—do what they want me to do. Besides, we only have to be girlfriend and boyfriend for 24 hours. It’s really not that big a deal. Are you in or not?”
Sunghoon took a few seconds to mull over your words. Sure, he would love to be your boyfriend for 24 hours. As long as his fantasies were brought to reality, he didn’t care if the whole relationship was fake and short-lived. 
For far too long, he’d pined after you. He thought he was doing an excellent job at hiding his feelings, but then you decided to make vlogs for fun. That’s when shit actually went downhill. 
Within a few years, you’d amassed a following of over 5 million on YouTube and 3 million on Instagram. It wouldn’t be an exaggeration to say you’d become somewhat of a local celebrity.  
Being one of your closest friends, Sunghoon was often featured in your videos. Initially, he’d baulked at the idea of being filmed, but you’d worked your magic on him. The boy soon found himself being comfortable around cameras. 
Even though Sunghoon never started his own YouTube channel, his popularity grew along with yours. His Instagram had garnered over two million followers, and courtesy of his good looks and attractive physique, he’d been offered a bunch of brand deals too.
You’d scowled at how far Sunghoon’s pretty privilege had gotten him. While you busted your ass coming up with unique ideas and editing your videos to perfection, all he needed to do was show up. 
What you didn’t know, though, was that part of the reason he’d become a heartthrob among the youth was you. 
You might have been dumb and blind, but your followers certainly were not. They’d realised how Sunghoon looked at you—his eyes always twinkled and a fond smile automatically adorned his lips whenever he caught sight of you. 
To add to that, your fans had pointed out habits he didn’t even know he possessed. For example: idly braiding your strands; bringing you snacks whenever he swung by your apartment; saying hey, sunshine and giving you a side hug by way of greeting; disguising his compliments as insults. 
The list was embarrassingly long.
They’d noticed the elastic he kept around his wrist at all times too—it was one of the two you’d used to tie his hair into little ponytails because you were convinced you could transform him into Boo from Monsters, Inc.   
Sunghoon himself had forgotten the reason he wore the elastic around his wrist. All he knew was that it was yours and it felt right. But when he read the comments obsessing about it, he rushed to watch the video your fans were referring to. 
And damn, they were right. 
Sunghoon didn’t know if you’d seen the comments your fans regularly left on your various social media pages. You’d never mentioned anything about the community calling you “couple goals,” and he was too much of a coward to inquire if you were aware. 
It was infuriating to know how transparent he was. Sunghoon wished he’d never gotten used to the camera and let slip his true self. 
Perhaps this was the cost of gaining the boyfriend material label—his unrequited feelings exposed for the entire world to see. 
Sunghoon would never admit it, but he’d spent the better part of a day reporting everyone who’d shipped him with you. The entire incident had truly made him go off the rails. 
However, today’s revelation was unexpected. It was an opportunity. A chance to experience something he’d desired for many years. Suddenly, he found himself thanking those busybodies online instead of cussing them out for being ridiculously invested in his love life.
Sunghoon knew saying yes to your proposition would bite him in the ass later on. He knew he’d crave more of you once he got a taste of being your boyfriend, and giving this fake relationship a shot would definitely make it harder for him to get over you in the future. He knew he was a massive idiot for willingly indulging in impending heartbreak, but he could always cross that bridge when he came to it.  
“Okay,” he said, meeting your gaze. “I’m in.”
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There was a small chance Sunghoon was getting ahead of himself. Maybe he shouldn’t have taken it upon himself to organise the perfect date. 
Being bitchless his entire life wasn’t doing him any favours in performing the task. Originally, he’d figured he would do a quick Google search and plan a day according to the results shown.
Unfortunately, most activities on the list were things the two of you already did on a normal basis. He’d racked his brain to think of a unique idea after scrolling through the internet for hours on end and coming up empty-handed. 
Karaoke? Check. Restaurant hopping? Psh, you did that every weekend. Rock climbing? He was scared of heights. Bowling? Boring. Concert? None of your favourite artists were in town. Clubbing? He would rather spend quality time with you than get both of you wasted. Arcade? Basic and low-budget; he didn’t want to be cheap. Road-trip? Needed more than just 24 hours.
Sunghoon wondered if he was the problem. He’d shot down every option he’d come across so far by classifying it as not good enough. His stress levels were skyrocketing trying to make your 24-hour relationship perfect.
An entire day’s research had ended up being fruitless. You’d decided to go through with the challenge on Sunday, so he only had tomorrow to come up with something satisfactory. 
Sighing, Sunghoon rubbed his eyes and closed his laptop. He eyed his phone on the bedside table for a few seconds, contemplating whether he should just call you and ask if you had anything in mind. 
Before he could rethink his choice, he picked up the device and dialled you. 
“Hey.” Your voice on the other end was deep and hoarse. A glance at the wall clock informed Sunghoon it was past midnight, and he’d likely woken you up. Guilt twisted his stomach. “Is something wrong?”
“Sorry, I didn’t realise it was late,” he mumbled. “I’ll call you tomorrow.”
“Nah, it’s alright. I was watching a movie and passed out halfway through it. I needed to finish it anyway.” 
Lying back on his bed, Sunghoon inquired, “Ready or not?”
“Yeah.” You huffed a laugh. “I finally got around to seeing it. Your choice, as always, is impeccable.” 
Though you couldn’t see him, he raised an eyebrow. “Didn’t you just say you dozed off in the middle of it?” 
“Well, yeah, but that’s because I’m not a stupid nocturnal with no care for their sleep cycle and health.” 
“Ouch.” Sunghoon clutched his chest. He could practically hear you roll your eyes. “No need to be so harsh.”
You hummed absent-mindedly, a yawn escaping your lips. “Was there a reason you hit me up, or can I get back to the movie?” 
“Oh, yeah.” Sunghoon cleared his throat. “Do you have any suggestions for the challenge? I’ve been thinking about it for a while, but I haven’t come up with anything interesting.” 
“Not really. I tried researching a bit, and there isn’t much we don’t already do. I’m starting to wonder if the only difference between a platonic and romantic relationship is physical intimacy. I’m sure we can reach a consensus though,” you added.  
Sunghoon groaned. “This is proving to be more difficult than I—”
“WAIT!” you interrupted him with an exclaim. “How about a picnic date? We’ve been talking about going on one with the rest of our friends for ages, but it’s never worked out. Let’s go—just the two of us. We can choose outfits for each other too! I’ll order you something online, and you do the same for me. We can spend the rest of our day doing whatever you want.” 
Sunghoon’s eyes widened. “That’s actually not a bad idea.”
“Right?” you giggled. “Maybe we can spread a blanket in the park under a tree and have a nice brunch. I’ll organise it!”
“I’ll take care of dinner and plan another activity for us to do between the two meals.” He grinned. “Looks like we might actually be able to pull this off, Y/N.”
“I don’t think I’ve ever been this excited to film a video,” you admitted.
Sunghoon’s heart fluttered, and his lips widened into a smile. “Me too.”
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Everything was set. You’d received the dress Sunghoon had ordered for you, and he’d taken delivery of the one you’d bought for him.
Upon opening the package, Sunghoon was surprised to see you’d accidentally ended up matching outfits. While he’d chosen a white summer dress with blue flowers for you, you’d picked out a white graphic tee and low-rise, faded blue, baggy jeans for him. 
The fit was minimal—something that he would have purchased if he’d seen it in a mall. 
Grabbing a pair of sunglasses and running a hand through his messy hair, Sunghoon made a beeline for his car. He shot you a quick text regarding his ETA before backing the vehicle out of his driveway.
[hoon]: omw be there in 10
[y/n]: okie i’ll wait for u. call me when ur outside!!!!!!!!!
Averting his gaze to the road again, Sunghoon took a deep breath. He’d finally planned the perfect day out. It took a lot of effort and coordination on his part, but the several favours he had to call in were worth it. 
He’d probably gone over the top, especially considering the fact that this wasn’t even real, but he was determined not to half-ass anything. He had one chance, and he’d damn well make sure he didn’t waste it.
Turning the corner of your house, Sunghoon dialled your number. “I’m here.” 
“Coming,” you popped, the sound of your footsteps descending the stairs audible through the call. 
He grabbed the bouquet of flowers from the backseat, got rid of his sunglasses and exited the car. Your door opened a few seconds later, and Sunghoon’s world slipped from under his feet. 
God, you were beautiful. So beautiful and so fucking pretty in the dress he’d chosen for you. The material fit you perfectly—it accentuated your upper body and was flowy from your lower waist. The dress was almost ankle-length with a side slit that began at your upper thigh. Your shoulders and collar bones were exposed, a gold pendant filling the empty space the deep square neckline left in its wake. 
Your left shoulder was carrying a tote bag, and your right hand was holding a large picnic basket. Much to Sunghoon’s surprise, your free hand was wrapped around a bouquet too. 
Snapping himself out of his reverie, he took the basket from you and placed it inside the car. “You look amazing, sunshine,” he breathed. “Just—wow.”
Giggling, you did a little twirl for him. “Thanks! I love what you’ve done with your hair. It makes you more attractive.”
Sunghoon mock-saluted and bowed dramatically, a chuckle escaping his lips. “Took me ten minutes to style it.” Glancing at the flowers in your hand, he asked, “You got me flowers?” 
Maybe his eyesight was faulty, but Sunghoon felt your entire demeanour suddenly change. Tucking a stray strand behind your ear, you averted your gaze from his and shyly mumbled, “You took it upon yourself to plan the majority of the day. The least I could do was gift you some flowers.” 
Right when Sunghoon thought he couldn’t love you any more than he already did, you went ahead and did this. He’d never received flowers in his life before, and the gesture meant everything to him. 
Swallowing the lump in his throat, he took the bouquet from you. “Thank you,” he said, voice heavy with gratitude. “Don’t kill me, but I don’t know the name of these flowers.” 
Laughing, you pinched his cheek. “They’re asters.” 
“What do they mean?” 
“Why don’t you search it up when you go home?” you quipped. “Let me know once you find out.”  
Sunghoon shrugged and handed you the flowers he’d bought for you. “Sunflowers for my sunshine.” 
A wide grin broke across your lips. “They’re my favourite!” 
“I know, dummy,” he said, flicking your forehead and opening the passenger’s door for you. “That’s why I got them for you.” 
“Be nice!” you complained as he walked around the car. Taking a seat beside you, he started the engine and began driving. “I’m your girlfriend!” 
“I just opened the door for you,” Sunghoon pointed out, promptly ignoring the way his heart rate picked up. “I think I’m being gentlemanly enough.” 
“That’s not a word.”
“Is too.”
“Is not.”
“Is too.”
“This is why you get no bitches.”
“I got you.”
“Are you calling me a bitch?”
“I’m calling you mine.”
Snorting, you said, “Not your best save, Park.” 
Biting down the smile threatening to break across his lips, Sunghoon said, “I’ll survive, but you should really start recording.” 
“Right,” you gasped, your eyes widening. Fetching the DSLR from your tote bag and switching it on, you placed it on the dashboard carefully. After ensuring that the camera was rolling, you began, “I’m in the car with Sunghoon right now. He just picked me up, but I lowkey forgot to record it.”
“Y/N was too busy gawking at me,” Sunghoon teased and raised an eyebrow at the lens. “I’m too attractive for my own good.” 
“Nobody’s buying your bullshit.” You rolled your eyes. “But if you do think he looks cute, it’s because I chose his outfit.” 
“And if you think she looks beautiful, that’s because I chose her outfit.” 
You nodded. “He did. We thought kicking off the challenge this way would be cool. Clothes were ordered by both of us individually, which means neither of us had any idea what had been chosen by the other until we met ten minutes ago. Crazy how we still ended up matching.”
“We exchanged flowers too. Y/N got me asters, and I got her sunflowers.” 
“Hoon has no idea what asters signify,” you commented and nudged him with your elbow. “He didn’t even know the flowers I gifted him were asters.”
“Don’t shame me for not being a nerd!” Sunghoon defended himself. “Only you can be the kind of person who reads The Language of Flowers and indulges in floriography because they’re bored.” 
 “Aaaand the worst boyfriend award goes to this guy sitting right next to me,” you announced, shooting him a nasty glare. “He’s been annoying me from the moment he came to pick me up.”
“I opened the door for you!”
“How long are you going to milk the one gentlemanly thing you did?” 
Sunghoon scoffed in disbelief. “I thought gentlemanly wasn’t a word.”
“I lied,” you popped and grinned cheekily. 
“The problem with this relationship is you, woman, not me.”
Laughing, you turned to the camera again. “We’re going on multiple dates today. I’ve organised a picnic brunch, and Hoon has organised dinner.”
“It’s a surprise,” Sunghoon explained. “But I can assure you that it’s going to be the coolest thing ever.”
You hummed in agreement. “I believe him. He always gives the best surprises. Anyway, I’m going to stop recording now, and I’ll see you guys once we reach the park. I think we’re almost there.” 
“Five minutes,” Sunghoon provided. 
You grabbed the DSLR and brought it close to your face. Cupping your hand over the lens as if you were telling it a secret, you whispered, “T-minus five minutes to the best picnic date ever. Bye!”
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Despite it being June and most kids being on vacation, the park wasn’t crowded. 
Even though it was almost 10:30 and the sun was merciless, there were plenty of people jogging on the track. Sunghoon spotted a laughter club in session a few hundred metres away from where you’d laid your blanket under the tree.
Thanks to the clear sky and blowing wind, more than a few people had taken out their own picnic baskets and decided to enjoy the weather. A bunch of middle-schoolers were playing basketball about fifty metres away from your tree, and though Sunghoon would have appreciated the peace, it was fun to watch them run around on the court. 
You’d set up the camera immediately upon arrival. Even though it was still rolling, neither of you were aware of it. It lay forgotten to the side, and as far as Sunghoon was concerned, it was just the two of you.
“It’s a beautiful day,” you mumbled, gathering your strands and tying them up in a messy bun. “Really fucking hot though.” 
“You have some relief, at least,” Sunghoon said, pointing at your exposed shoulders and flowing dress. “I’m fully covered and positively dying in here.” 
You smiled sheepishly. “Oops. That’s my bad.” 
Laughing, Sunghoon ran a hand through his hair. “What did you get for us to eat in that basket of yours?” he asked. “It was pretty heavy.” 
“Nothing much,” you answered and dragged the basket closer to you. Opening the lid, you pulled out Tupperware containing watermelons, muskmelons and mango slices. You’d also prepared a heart-shaped pizza and baked half a dozen macarons. Finally, you fetched a bottle filled with peach-iced tea and a pair of champagne glasses. 
Sunghoon gaped at the assortment of food you’d arranged. “Did you make everything by yourself?” 
“I wish,” you snorted. “Mom made the macarons and delivered them via FedEx. I don’t have the patience to bake.”
“Okay, but this is still crazy,” Sunghoon said, amazement evident in his tone. “The amount of effort you’ve put in is insane.” 
Blushing, you shoved his shoulder. “Stop! You’re embarrassing me!”
“I’m complimenting you!” he exclaimed, and served himself a piece of the pizza. “Bringing homemade food is the best thing you could’ve done. And God, this is delicious. I’m going to wife you right now.” 
You laughed incredulously. “Slow down, Romeo. We just started dating. How about you show me a good time first?” 
This. This was exactly the reason why Sunghoon didn’t entirely hate being stuck in the friend zone. Because no matter how much you told people you were just friends and there was nothing going on between the two of you, you were constantly flirting. 
The only reason he was afraid of confessing his feelings was that he didn’t know much of the flirting was real. It was the dynamic of your friendship—neither of you thought it was weird making suggestive comments. You were too comfortable with each other to let such things bother you. 
Sunghoon could no longer tell whether your relationship was still platonic. He was too hopelessly in love with you to keep knowing the difference between a joke and genuineness. His heart surged every time you said something only a romantic partner would, and his heart shattered every time he reminded himself that you didn’t actually mean it. 
You never meant it. 
But Sunghoon was a selfish person. He was going to take what he could get. He would rather be unintentionally strung along than give these moments up. The minuscule part of him that hated you for the pain you were causing him was nothing compared to the part of him that loved you unconditionally. 
Forcing himself out of his reverie, Sunghoon raised an eyebrow at you. “In front of everyone?”
“You’re so gross!” you snickered, your eyes shining with mischief. “I obviously mean when we get home!” 
I’m going to kill myself, Sunghoon thought. I’m going to kill myself before she kills me.   
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The two of you had finished eating almost thirty minutes ago. Now, you were just lying on the blanket and staring at the sky, having conversations about the most random topics. 
You were talking shit about some know-it-all guy in your physics class, but Sunghoon wasn’t really paying any attention to what you were saying.
He was still stuck on what had happened an hour ago when you’d urged him to feed you because “that was what couples did.” 
Sunghoon didn’t give a shit what couples did. His biggest problem at the moment was his mind replaying the incident like a broken record. He couldn’t stop thinking about it. He’d already known he was being an idiot by agreeing to come on this date, but he never thought he’d regret his decision this quickly.
“Are you okay?” 
Blinking, Sunghoon spared you a glance. “Peachy.” 
“Those kids over there are calling us,” you told him, pointing to the basketball court. “We should go see what they want.” 
Nodding, he pulled himself to his feet and gave you a hand. Leaving the DSLR under the tree wouldn’t have been safe, so you grabbed it and the two of you made your way to the children waiting for you. 
“Hey,” a perky boy greeted you enthusiastically. “I’m Hyun. We’ve been playing basketball for the past several hours. The team that wins 6 out of 11 matches has to treat the other team to ice cream. Unfortunately, 2 of our friends left, and now it’s just the 6 of us divided into 2 teams. We really don’t want to play half-court, but we can’t play full-court with a team of only 3 each. Do you guys want to play the last few matches with us? One match only lasts 15 minutes.” 
Sunghoon exchanged a look with you. Then, you glanced at your spot under the tree. Lastly, you checked out your outfit—the slit exposing most of your leg and the lack of coverage for your shoulders.
“I have a pair of shorts and a shirt in my car,” he informed you. 
You took a moment to weigh your options. Honestly, playing in the open when the sun was out to torture everyone didn’t sound appealing. There was also the issue of you needing to switch outfits, and you didn’t know if you wanted to take the effort of changing inside Sunghoon’s car. 
But kids had always been your weak spot and the little rascals were staring you down with their puppy eyes. 
You sighed. “Fine. We’re in.”
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“I haven’t played in a while,” Sunghoon admitted. “I think it’s been over 6 months.” 
“I haven’t played since varsity girls either,” you said. The kids had left to take a break a few minutes ago and the court was empty save for the two of you.
You’d changed into his clothes, but the shirt was too long for you. So, you’d requested him to tie the extra into a knot at the back. Thankfully, the shorts could be tightened at the waist with lace. 
Sunghoon could get used to you wearing his wardrobe. 
He idly dribbled the ball the kids had given to him for safekeeping while you stretched your stiff muscles. “Then I guess we get to evaluate whose skills have become more rusty.”
“Free shots?” you asked, eyes alight with a competitive fire and a smirk tugging at your lips. “We can test our aim and get a feel of the baskets on this court. It would be a good warm-up exercise.”  
Sunghoon poked the inside of his cheek with his tongue. “Bring your camera here. Record me from up close. I’m going to go for a layup.”
“Wow,” you scoffed but did as you were told nonetheless. Before stepping onto the court, you’d filmed Sunghoon and yourself, explaining that you were about to play basketball with a bunch of kids. Naturally, you’d decided not to record the match in order to respect the privacy of the children. “Don’t you think you’re getting ahead of yourself? I’m telling you right now that I won’t care if you miss the shot. I will use it to humiliate you in the video.” 
Sunghoon rolled his eyes. 
You switched on the DSLR and pointed the lens at him. “We’re doing free shots till the kids come back from their break,” you said. “Hoon’s convinced he can land a layup even though he hasn’t touched a ball for several months.” 
“Don’t condescend me,” Sunghoon grumbled as he walked to the 3-pointer line. “It’s not like I’ve completely forgotten how to play. I’m pretty sure I can nail a simple shot.”
“We’ll see.”
“You know what,” he called. “I’m going to dedicate this layup to you so that when I make it, you’ll know not to doubt my athletic prowess.”
All you did was raise an eyebrow. 
“This one’s for you, babe!” Sunghoon announced and began running. The ball was a number 6—smaller than the size 7 he was used to. The grip was worn due to excessive use, but he still had complete control over it. 
However, he misjudged the distance from the hoop. He realised a second too late that he’d taken the first step of the layup later than he was supposed to. 
The ball collided against the rim and rebounded.
“Air ball!” you hollered and zoomed into Sunghoon’s face. “Athletic prowess found to be missing! What a shame!” 
His cheeks, along with the tips of his ears, were red with embarrassment. He couldn’t even bring himself to look into the camera after making such a big fool out of himself.
“I am begging you, Y/N. Can we please edit that part out?” 
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“I’m kicking your ass, Park.”
“I suggest you take the over-confidence down a notch.” 
You smirked, dribbling the basketball in place. Sunghoon was blocking the way to your side of the court, and each of the kids on your team had a man on them. Playing in the sun for so long must have tired them out because no one was making an effort to get rid of the shield standing in front of them.
The last match was a 1v1 at this point.  
“I’m not in the habit of lying,” you said, and dribbled the ball from between his legs. 
Sunghoon cursed under his breath and chased after you, but you were speeding away from him faster than he could keep up. The layup was clean and effortless. You barely broke a sweat. 
“SUCK IT!” you screamed. “Your team is going down!” 
Sunghoon rolled his eyes. He watched your team—Hyun, Chul and Dae—do the victory dance you’d taught them. It was hilarious because none of you had any coordination. The arm wave move made it seem as though all of you were having a seizure. 
“We still have fifteen seconds of the match left,” he pointed out, and pat Iseul’s back in reassurance. “Don’t go celebrating just yet.” 
 “You’re four points behind. Just admit defeat,” Dae said. “We’ve won!” 
“We’re not surrendering,” Hajoon said angrily. “Sunghoon will make sure we win.”
“Boys!” you interrupted loudly. “Let’s finish the championship sportingly. We’re playing for fun.” 
Chul muttered something under his breath that Sunghoon and you chose to ignore. 
“Seojoon,” Sunghoon called quietly. “Now that we have possession of the ball, I need you to pass it to me from below. Then I need Hajoon and Iseul to gang up on Y/N. Don’t push or shove; just keep her away. The worst thing we can do is commit a foul. The rest of the boys won’t be a problem, but I’ll need Seojoon to act as my shield in case they try to take the ball from me. Do not let anyone come near me under any circumstances. I’m going to go for a 5-pointer.”
The trio audibly gasped. 
Iseul nervously asked, “Are you sure you can score?” 
“Not without the three of you helping me out.” Sunghoon nodded. “Y/N is quick and slippery. Keep your eye on her. We’ll lose if she gets possession of the ball. I’ll take care of the rest.” 
The boys let out a sound of agreement and dispersed, taking their respective positions. 
Sunghoon searched for you, and when your gazes met, he made a gesture of slitting his throat. This time, you rolled your eyes and dismissed him without a word. 
“Let’s start,” you announced with a clap and got into position. He noticed you were standing away from the basket. The rest of your team was too. It dawned on Sunghoon that you’d positioned everyone in a way that would prevent them from committing a foul which would grant his team free throws. 
It was smart and reasonable of you to think that way. Sunghoon wasn’t known for landing 5-pointers. Heck, he never even attempted them. He usually went for layups and 3-pointers. 
Focusing on the game, he took a deep breath. Seojoon passed the ball at him as soon as you yelled Go!
Sunghoon dribbled to your side of the court immediately. Out of the corner of his eye, he saw you hesitate, but your mouth parted in realisation the second you caught onto what he was doing. 
“Stay on her!” he yelled at Iseul and Hajoon. “Don’t let her go.”
Sunghoon dodged the rest of your teammates. Seojoon wasn’t doing a good job at keeping them away, but he didn’t have enough time to dwell on it. He could do this by himself as long as you were out of the picture. 
Sunghoon eyed the basket and bent at his knees, gathering enough momentum to jump. He’d been hitting the gym more often, and he hoped to God his hard work wouldn’t fail him at such a crucial time. 
Exhaling once, Sunghoon jumped and let the ball fly across the court. The moment the ball was out of his hands, you crashed into him, knocking him to the ground and falling on top of him. 
“Ow,” he muttered, his arm wrapping itself around your waist on instinct. “That’s foul play.” 
Before you could bite back, Sunghoon heard someone scream, “No way! Sunghoon did it!” 
Sunghoon grinned and craned his neck to look at his teammates. A laugh tumbled past his lips when he saw them doing the floss dance and playfully teasing the losing team.
The sound of your groan made him avert his attention to you. You’d raised your head to find out whether Sunghoon had made the basket, and upon realising that you’d lost the match, you let it fall on his chest again. “Man,” you grumbled in defeat.
“Aw,” Sunghoon teased. “It happens to the best of us.”
“Who asked?”
Snorting, Sunghoon loosened his grip around your waist. Rolling off him, you laid down on your back in the middle of the court next to him. “Am I supposed to buy you ice cream now?” 
He checked his watch before answering, “Nah. Let’s go home and freshen up. It’s almost time for my date.”
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“The beach,” you marvelled. Both of you were standing on a cliff overlooking the expanse of sand and water. “I should have guessed.” 
Sunghoon agreed. It shouldn’t have been hard to pinpoint the venue of the date once he’d requested you to wear shorts and sandals. However, your obliviousness had worked in his favour. 
The entire thing was supposed to be a surprise. It was supposed to sweep you off your feet.
He averted his attention from the ocean to find that you were already staring at him. A soft smile was adorning your face, and with the breeze ruffling your unbound hair, you looked nothing short of a fairy tale. 
“Do you remember the last time we came here?” you inquired, and returned your gaze to the view again. Sunghoon didn’t bother to take his eyes off you—he couldn’t take his eyes off you. The reflection of the sunset in your irises was too intoxicating. “Jay, Jake, Yizhuo and Isa were with us. We spent the entire night talking around a bonfire. I couldn’t keep myself awake once the clock struck two. You tucked me close and let me rest my head on the space between your shoulder and neck. You kissed my forehead and promised me you’d wake me up in a few hours.” 
Sunghoon didn’t say anything. He only kept staring at the image of the sunset in your eyes—the way the ocean consumed the ball of fire the same way his love for you consumed his very being. 
Love shouldn’t hurt this much, he thought. It shouldn’t be this painful.  
“I remember the way you smelt,” you continued. “Like vanilla and sandalwood. I remember wanting to pull you closer because you also smelt like home. I hated moving to a new city for college. I missed our hometown. I missed life being simpler. I missed the old times. But those brief moments before I fell asleep reminded me that not everything had changed. The clumsy boy I’d met in kindergarten was still with me. Sure, he was a bigger pain in my ass than he had been when we were kids, but he hadn’t left my side even once. And I knew he wouldn’t for a long time.”
“You’ve been the only constant in my life, Sunghoon,” you mumbled and turned your body towards his. Snaking your arms around his waist, you pulled him into a hug. “Thank you for being a good friend to me. I love you.”
And though Sunghoon knew you didn’t mean it the way he wished you did, he returned your embrace and confessed, “I love you too.” 
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“What the fuck?” you whispered and let go of Sunghoon’s hand to jog ahead. “WHAT THE FUCK? IS THAT A CANDLELIGHT DINNER?” 
Laughing in amusement, he pocketed his hands and watched you freak out. The beach was usually crowded at this hour, but he’d asked Jake—the surfer of their group—if there was anywhere he could spend the evening undisturbed. 
“Your eyes do not deceive you,” he joked as he approached you. “I know it’s kind of corny, but this was the most romantic date setting I could think of.”
“Corny?” you exclaimed incredulously. “This is amazing!” Nudging him with your elbow, you teased, “I didn’t know you had it in you.” 
“You would have known a lot more if you’d asked me out before,” Sunghoon smirked, a suggestive undertone to his comment. “But I suppose we can make do with what we have now.”
You snorted. “You’re insufferable.” Then added, “I don’t want to shoot us having dinner here. Maybe I’ll just film the date set-up and our outfits, but I think I want this evening to remain between us only.”
“Oh.” Sunghoon raised an eyebrow. “Yeah, sure, that works for me. Do you want me to get your camera?” 
The next five minutes were spent recording the date he had organised. The food was prepared by Jay, whose chef father had taught him a thing or two before the boy moved to the city for college. Sunghoon had dragged Yizhuo and Isa with him to shop for decor. 
They’d bought a soft blanket which was now spread on the sand. He’d also purchased six couch pillows to make the setting cosier. Fairy lights covered the perimeter of the throw. 
The coffee table Sunghoon had stolen from himself and brought to the beach was filled with all kinds of your favourite food, a scented candle burning in the centre of it. 
Since he’d known he couldn’t escape you to set up everything that he’d planned, he’d begged his friends to do it for him. Obviously, they’d teased him about it on their group chat, but he’d ignored them the way he always did. 
“I have another surprise,” Sunghoon popped as the two of you settled down on opposite sides of the table. “I don’t know if you’re going to be up for it though.”
“Is it the wine?” you asked, eyeing the corked bottle partially hidden under one of the pillows. “Because I saw it long back, and I am all for getting drunk.” 
Sunghoon chuckled. “Nah, it’s not the wine, but yeah, we’re getting drunk. There’s absolutely no doubt about it. But,” he continued, “I’d been going through Pinterest to search for date ideas when I called you in the middle of your movie a few nights ago. After our talk, I remembered you’d made this board with Karina when you were a thirteen-year-old.”
You gasped and reached over the table to smack his arm. “You stalked my Pinterest?! That is so uncool! There’s tons of embarrassing shit on there! I should have privated those boards when I had the chance,” you muttered to yourself. 
“Then I wouldn’t have rented a projector for us to watch a movie after we finish dinner.” Sunghoon grinned cheekily. “We are not watching some sappy romcom though,” he warned. “Soap2Day came in clutch so we can watch Suzume or Guardians of the Galaxy Volume 3. Your choice.”
Your mouth parted in surprise. For a few moments, you didn’t say anything. With a raised eyebrow, Sunghoon watched you struggle to form the words. “Okay, I know it was creepy to stalk you on Pinterest—” 
“NO!” you blurted, your eyes widening. “It’s not creepy! I just—No one has ever done anything of this sort for me. I don’t know what to say except… thank you.”
Before he could reply, you buried your face in your hands, and muttered, “Gosh, I sound so ungrateful, but I really do appreciate it. More than I can express.” Raising your head, you looked straight into his eyes. “I have this extremely strong urge to kiss you right now. Would it be fine with you if I acted on it?”
Sunghoon stopped breathing. His smile dropped, and his heart skipped a beat. The entire world could have crumbled, and he would have remained frozen in place, trying to make sense of what you’d just said. 
“W—what?” he croaked. 
You broke off the eye contact and dropped your gaze to the ground. “Sorry. That was stupid of me—”
“Yes,” Sunghoon breathed. “Yes, it would be fine with me.” 
You exhaled, appearing visibly relieved, and that somehow made him feel better about the sharp turn the evening had taken. Of course, he was thrilled you wanted to kiss him, but part of him couldn’t help but wonder if you’d regretted voicing your thoughts. 
Licking your lips, you unfolded your legs and scooted away from the table. Instead of standing up, you got on your knees and made your way towards him.
Sunghoon also moved away from the table to make space for you, and once you reached him, you swung your legs on either side of him. Straddling his lap, you towered over him. 
Snaking your arms around his shoulder, you glanced at his mouth. 
Even though it was driving Sunghoon out of his mind to not close the distance between your lips, he let you take your time. You traced your thumb across his lower lip and then shifted your hand to the back of his neck. 
Weaving your fingers through his hair, you let your eyes flutter shut and lowered your mouth over his. 
Sunghoon’s entire universe exploded into shards of molten light. A tidal wave of emotions crashed into him, setting his nerves on fire and making fireworks explode inside his chest.
The boy couldn’t have kissed you back any faster. Tilting his head to the side, he pulled you closer by the nape. 
Settling in his lap, you tugged at his hair, the nails of your other hand digging into his shoulder. 
A groan slipped past Sunghoon’s lips. God, he’d coveted the taste of you for so long, and now that he was finally kissing you, he realised he’d never estimated the magnitude of his love for you accurately before. 
Because this… this was everything. Sunghoon felt on top of the world, and pure euphoria was coursing through his veins. He couldn’t get enough of you. A single kiss would never be enough to satiate him. The floodgates were thrown open, and the thought of this being a one-time, impulsive thing made his gut twist painfully. 
He knew he needed to tell you. Right here, right now, he needed to tell you the truth. 
“Y/N.” Sunghoon gasped, breaking the kiss. He was leaning back now, his weight resting on his left elbow. The desperation and urgency with which you’d come onto him had been more than he could handle. “I need to tell you something.” 
Your eyes remained glued to his lips and there was a tinge of disappointment on your face. As if you didn’t want to stop. As if you wanted to keep going. 
With a jolt, it dawned on him that you probably wanted him just as much as he wanted you.  
The epiphany alone was enough for Sunghoon to consider ditching his plan of confessing his feelings and instead close the distance between your mouths again. But, he steeled his nerves and pushed himself into a sitting position.
He didn’t bother asking you to get up from his lap nor did he bother removing his left hand from your waist. If this confession went sideways, he’d end up losing you anyway. 
“What is it?” you whispered, your disappointed expression giving way to concern and nervousness. “Did I go too far? I’m sorry—”
“Stop,” Sunghoon ground out. “Please stop. Let me speak.” 
You pursed your lips, but he could tell you were scared shitless. There was fear in your eyes, and he hated making you feel as though you’d done something wrong when you’d given him the one thing he’d wanted more than anything else.
“I…” Sunghoon started, forcing himself to find the courage to say the words. “Y/N, I love you.” 
There it was. He’d done it. The cat was out of the bag, and all he could do now was wait with bated breath. 
Your mouth parted open, but no sound came out of it. Your face was unreadable. It was void of any emotion. Swallowing the lump in his throat, Sunghoon tore his gaze from yours and let out a humourless laugh. “Right. That’s okay—”
But then he felt your hands grabbing his jaw, making him pin his attention on you again. 
There was pure, unadulterated joy on your countenance, a wide smile adorning your lips. “I love you too,” you breathed. “Oh, my God, Sunghoon, I love you too.” 
Sunghoon blinked. “What?” he mumbled, his mouth set in a pout due to your squishing his cheeks. 
You leaned forward and pressed a chaste kiss to his puckered lips. “I love you too,” you repeated. 
Gripping your hands, Sunghoon removed them from his face and stared up at you in bewilderment. “You’re serious?” 
“Hasn’t it been obvious to you?”
“Hasn’t it been obvious to you?” he shot back. “I’ve loved you since high school.”
You snorted. “So have I.” 
“Sophomore year.”
“Same.”
“I knew right after the homecoming ball.”
“Sucker!” you exclaimed. “I knew right after the game!” 
Sunghoon frowned. “It’s not a competition, Y/N,” he said, and then added, “But if it were, I would win. The amount of effort I’ve put into hiding my feelings is insane.”
“Sure,” you drawled. “That’s why all my followers keep saying it’s clear you’re in love with me.”
The tips of his ears turned red in embarrassment. “You saw the comments?” 
“Of course I did,” you answered, your voice soft. “I just never believed them. The notion never seemed possible. Isn’t it crazy how it was real this entire time?” 
Sunghoon chuckled. “We’re idiots.”
“We are,” you said, smiling at him in affection. “To be honest, I wouldn’t have ever said anything about what I truly felt if you hadn’t found the courage to confess to me.” 
“I know, I know,” you defended and rolled your eyes when he gave you a pointed look. “I did ask if I could kiss you. Trust me, I was more surprised than you were. Heck, I was fully prepared to play it off by spouting some bullshit in case you said no. What you did for me, Sunghoon… I couldn’t keep the urge inside me anymore. I didn’t care about the consequences. I didn’t care that there would be no turning back—I knew I had to take the risk. And I’m glad that I did.”
Sunghoon’s heart swelled with joy. “Me too.”
“Wait,” you said quickly. “How’d you know you were in love with me?”
Rubbing the back of his neck sheepishly, he answered, “While we were dancing at homecoming. You didn’t have a single move in you, but you didn’t wanna be the only one not dancing, so you started doing what you’d learnt in Zumba. It was hilarious—watching you be clueless but still killing it on the dance floor. It made me proud of you, but more than that, it made me realise what I felt for you.” 
“Aw,” you cooed. “That’s really sweet of you, but I definitely knew what I was doing.”
“Let’s not ruin the moment by lying to each other.”
“You’re such a dork!” 
“It’s your turn now!” Sunghoon grinned. “Tell me!”
“Okay, but you have to promise not to judge me,” you warned. “My story is embarrassing.” 
Locking his pinkie with yours, he promised, “I won’t.”
“Remember how you sat with Yeojin at the game?” you asked, to which Sunghoon nodded. “Well, I’d been saving seats for us. I fought a lot of people to keep the seat next to me vacant, but you didn’t even acknowledge me when I called your name. Yeojin caught hold of you, and you went to sit with her without bothering to check if I was around.” Shrugging, you mumbled, “That made me mad and jealous and upset. Not just at her, but at both of you. I’d never been possessive over my friends, and I’d never felt such ugly emotions before. There was only one reasonable explanation.”
Sunghoon’s eyebrows flew up. “Woah. I’m sorry for what I did.”
“Nah, it’s cool. It was loud at the game and I don’t think you heard me.” You laughed and waved him away. “I was being petty. And I know it’s not cute like your story, but that was what made me realise there was a chance I loved you.”
“Cute or not, that was the best story I’ve ever heard,” he said cheekily. “Also, don’t get me wrong—I would love nothing more than have you sit in my lap, but I think we should finish dinner first. Let’s finish what you started once we’re done eating.”
Your eyes widened, and you scrambled away from him. “Right.”
“Wait!” Sunghoon grabbed your wrist before you could get up and go back to the other side of the table. “The asters—what do they signify?” 
You smiled and leaned closer to his face, pressing the gentlest of kisses to his cheek. 
“Love.” 
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eddiespornstache · 4 months ago
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The entire point of 7x04 TO ME
is that Buck has no context for the feelings he’s experiencing. He knows he’s feeling jealous but he INCORRECTLY assumes the jealousy is targeted towards Tommy over Eddie because that’s what makes sense to him. He’s “allowed” to be jealous over Eddie in his own mind because that fits in with their best friend dynamic. It doesn’t cross his mind that he could be jealous over Tommy because he’s not operating from a framework where that’s a conclusion he could draw since he’s never verbalized to himself that it’s possible for him to have a crush on a dude
That’s why Buck’s conscious actions like buying the basketball and getting Eddie’s attention when he’s on the phone are about Eddie. Because Buck doesn’t know what’s going on in his brain yet and he thinks it’s about Eddie. It’s his subconscious actions like shoving Eddie (since he clearly didn’t intentionally mean to do that) that point to the fact that Eddie isn’t actually the one Buck is jealous over, he’s the one he’s jealous of.
It’s not until the scene in the loft where Buck is feeling sufficiently embarrassed by his behavior, and Tommy’s right there getting closer and closer, and the flirtation between them is getting more and more apparent, that he finally realizes that it was, in fact, always about Tommy. Part of the reason getting his attention was so exhausting was because Buck spent the bulk of the episode barking up the wrong tree because he didn’t know what he was doing!
Yes, it is stuctured a bit as a bait and switch for the audience because we spend the whole time following Buck’s pov, and he’s an unreliable narrator right up until Tommy kisses him. And I feel like I see a lot of people stuck on the bait part because it reinforces their preconceived notions when the episode itself and the way Bucktommy plays out for the rest of s7 very clearly emphasize that it was a misdirect, both for him the character and us the audience.
And this is not coming from a place of anti Buddie at all! If Buck wasn’t aware of his crush on Tommy he’s certainly not aware of any deep seated feelings towards Eddie at this point. Buddie absolutely could develop in the future. But in 7x04 the emphasis on Buck and Eddie’s relationship, even with all the jealous feelings, is very clearly laid out within the platonic bounds that, as far as Buck is currently concerned, it exists in. He was always jealous over Eddie as a friend, and he was always crushing on Tommy. That’s the takeaway that the episode wants the viewer have. Anything else, to me, is shipping goggles. If the show’s narrative ever gets to a point where it intentionally wants the viewer to understand that Buck has romantic feelings for Eddie, it will be explicit about it, it won’t make it a secret message that undercuts the main storyline of an episode.
But right now the canon pairing is Bucktommy. Right now Buck is explicitly romantically and physically very into Tommy. It’s okay to hope that changes later, but insisting on a reading of the show where that isn’t the case is intentionally not watching what the show is trying to tell you, which is odd to me because wanting to watch the show should be why we’re all here imo
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