#i did burst out laughing when i found out abt it cause i thought it would be like mysme and its just visual novel shit but its really okay

[fraternum-momentum]

I CANT I CANTTTTTTT I WILL LITERALLY EXPLODE RJIKNHGKRSBKFUCKNHJHFBNJEA JFHBAEJHBFJHBHBHBHBHBBAZHJDBAJHDBAJKHBDJKNA????A//////!?!!!!!!!!??!!???!?!?!??!! I CANNOT I LITERALLY NOT THE CAN I CANTTTTTT RAUGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

[whorediaries-09]

ok so i had a thought, i want to write this but im not sure if its good, what if reader was like no. 1 ambassador of hookup culture and remus was an old-school hopeless romantic and these two would be like best friends and remus would like take her home while she's drunk and everything and one day they both just talk really flirtily while being tipsy and kiss on the road and fuck and start to date but then remus gets insecure abt whether reader thinks he's just a fling but then reader tell him i love you while being piss-drunk and vomits on his jacket right after and he just knows it was meant to be?

wolfstar variant you say?

burning flames or paradise;

pairing- remus lupin x reader warning(s)- hurt/comfort, substances. a/n- i left out the vomiting part cause it kind of gives me the icks. sorry!

little train.

'you didn't kiss me,' you say, pouting your lips. the taste of cherry wine lingers on your tongue. his amber eyes stare into yours, hot breathe craning your neck. amongst the drunk giggles of your friends and the party background, your ears stay perked solely for his words.

'you're too drunk,' he says, half bored, half bemused. it was no tell tale or word of mouth that you were flirty with literally everyone. the 'femme fatale'. the 'brand ambassador of hookup culture'. those were the nicknames that were notoriously famous for you during your school days.

but not once had you ever flirted with him. until tonight, when the cherry wine was high on your tongue, your words not in your control. he tried to reach out for the glass in your hands. you laughed, the sound contagious as always, pulling the glass away from his reach. he watches the liquid swirl before he stares into the glossiness of your eyes.

'won't you kiss me, lupin?' he shakes his head.

'why should i kiss you?'

you flatter your eyelashes, puckering your lips. as if asking for something. he's afraid he's way too sure about what you want.

and he might have just given it to you if you weren't so pissed drunk.

'because you don't actually want me to kiss you.'

you put the glass on the table. resting your back on the pillar behind you. he walks closer to you, so that he can hear you over the barring noise of the speaker.

'i think, lupin, its rather the other way around. its you who doesn't want to kiss me. you treat your mouth as if it's heaven's gate,'

'why should i kiss you anyways?' he asked. 'i don't remember us being in a relationship of that sort.'

you stick out your tongue, blowing a raspberry at him.

'at least take me home?'

*-

the lights in your apartment are revolting and far too loud. the dopamine of last night still lingers. so does the ever present feeling of headache after a lot too many drinks. you rush through the drawers of your nightstand, searching for painkillers. otherwise you fear, you might just burst your head.

your eyes fall on a glass full of water, a coaster used as a lid to cover it. on top, there's a sachet of pills and a note with scribbled with a handwriting you recognize all too well.

you take the pills, sliding the note from between the wood and the glass.

'you fell asleep by the time i brought you home. take these pills. i know you'll need them.- love, lupin.'

the sunlight filtered through your curtains. a strange figment of fear crossed your heart, boiling it with trepid heat. you realized you'd fallen for your friend a few weeks ago-at least had a little crush on him.

you took the pills, chugging down the water. your drunk memories flashed in your head like a film. the faded memory of you asking him for a kiss popped in your mind. so did the one with him declining the offer.

did you mess up your friendship? god you hated yourself.

you crammed your face into the pillow, muffling your scream.

*-

remus was surprised when he found you at your doorstep, wearing the scarf he'd knitted you on your birthday, flowers in your hand. and his favorite kind of chocolates.

'hi,'

'you should've said you were coming! i would've cleaned up...'

'come on you fold your socks, lupin. what are you on about?'

he smiled, an awkward curl of his lips. you leaned against the doorway. the smell of soup was distinct, stains on his apron visible. you noticed he wasn't wearing a t-shirt. just an apron. your eyes fell on scars on his shoulders, each telling a tale. some terrible, some horribly terrible.

'so you're just gonna stare at me or?'

fuck, you got distracted.

'you didn't ask me in,'

'you know you don't need to be asked in,' he said, moving as your footsteps faltered on his carpeted floor.

'what are you cooking?'

'sweet corn soup and some toast. didn't feel like making much,'

'lupin, that'll be my 5-star michelin cuisine if i had the energy to make that. now these, are for you,'

'for the record, you take your whiskey neat. and you take your coffee black at three. and what for?'

'you're drunk on life, and i think that's great. and these are as an...apology.'

he walked to the kitchen, turning off the stove.

'an apology...for what exactly?'

'oh, you know because i asked you to kiss me,'

'you asked me to kiss you. you didn't force me.' he says, sitting down beside you. there's a pregnant pause before you keep your hand on his thigh, letting your touch linger.

'it's okay,' he whispers. 'you were drunk.'

'i wasn't. i take my whiskey neat. a little bit of cherry wine does nothing to me.' he chuckles.

'you were piss drunk. you fell asleep on the way home! i had to call a cab midway.'

'accusations accusations,'

'are they?'

you stay silent. you let the charge in the air linger. you let embrace you, entangle you in its ruins. your eyes travel to his face. his dusty blonde hair tangled across his face. lips chapped, pale skin rosy with the bits of chilly air of autumn.

'why didn't you kiss me?'

'what?'

'i said, why didn't you kiss me?' your grip tightens around his thigh. 'i really like you, you know?'

'come on, don't be a bitter liar.'

'i'm not lying.'

he neared your face, hot breathe scanning your face.

'i would love to kiss you,' his hand cradles your cheek, finger on your lip, 'taste these beautiful, soft lips. but i'm afraid, i can't. i can't be a fling for you,'

'who says,' you whisper, nearing his face, touching your forehead with his. 'that you're a fling. i'm not lying. i really do like you. hell have you seen me hooking up with anyone recently? i do like you. just trust me, for once.'

'hopefully,' he says brushing his lips against yours, 'i can.'

'you can,' you confirm, thrusting your lips against him, your tongue loitering in his mouth, tasting him.

he really did treat his mouth like it was heaven's gate.

****************************************

taglist - @reggieisfit @siriuslycaptainofthedawntreader @jamespottergf @eternallybipanicking @fictional-magic @iamgayforyourmom1510

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****************************************

[spaceshipellie]

hii how are you! i just saw your tlou x ethal cain event and im so excited!!

i wanna request an ellie x reader fluff/angst? tlou era with the lyrics : is there someone who has your heart, that keeps you gone, away from me?

where reader sees that ellie starts to hang around with dina more and less with you, feels insecure and thats when ellie notices that there's something off abt r and decides to confront r, which leads to a confession from r .. 💗 tysm!

“is there someone who has your heart, that keeps you gone, away from me?”

pairing: ellie x reader

summary/warnings: tlou au, jealous reader, pining, confessing feelings, fluff

hi sweet, i’m good thanks hope you’re okay too!

you and ellie had clicked pretty instantly when you joined the commune and had been best friends ever since. you shared everything together and knew each other like the back of your hand, which is why it hurt so much when all of a sudden she seemed to be spending less time with you and more time with dina.

you loved dina, of course you did, she was your friend too. but it twisted a knife in you every time you saw her with ellie, laughing and talking like you used to. dina was also naturally a very affectionate person meaning she was always hugging ellie or touching her arm and you could never tell if it was just the way dina was or if there was something going on between them.

even if it was the latter you knew you shouldn’t be jealous. if ellie had found happiness you wanted that for her, especially after her messy relationship with cat. but if she had, why hadn’t she told you? and if you were being completely honest with yourself, you wanted to be the one ellie fell for.

your feelings for your best friend had snuck up on you. one day you were meeting up with her and upon seeing her had this aching urge to kiss her, take her hand, tell her how you felt. maybe these feelings had been brewing silently behind the scenes for a while but it felt like it had hit you like a ton of bricks.

that was about a month ago and you had made an effort to keep it to yourself and not risk ruining anything. but maybe you had by mistake? why else would she be acting distant from you. it’s not like you never hung out anymore but the tension had changed slightly. in fact you were having a movie night with her tonight at your place. oh yeah, and with dina. you’d considered cancelling but curiosity to see what they’d be like around each other was eating you alive. you had to see even if it hurt.

the tv was the only thing glowing in the dark room as you sat on the couch, ellie in between you and dina. all three of you had your legs stretched out resting on the coffee table. you felt insane for micro-analysing the situation. was ellie sat closer to you or dina? did she lean into her more when she laughed at something? ellie’s foot suddenly knocked yours as she shifted their position.

“sorry.”

“it’s okay.”

christ, i’m pathetic, you thought as that accidental foot tap caused butterflies to erupt in your stomach. you continued watching the movie with your arms folded, occasionally reaching over to grab some of the snacks. suddenly the two of them burst out laughing at something in the movie that you must have missed and you looked over to see dina’s head on ellie’s shoulder and ellie looking down at her briefly before looking back at the screen, a huge humorous grin across her face. you couldn’t help the sigh that left you as you excused yourself to the bathroom. you didn’t see how ellie’s eyes followed you out of the room, her grin fading.

“um, i’ll be right back,” ellie mumbled, brushing crumbs off her hoodie as she stood up.

you jumped when you opened the bathroom door to leave and found her standing there. you prayed she hadn’t been there long otherwise she might have heard the pep talk you’d actually been doing in there.

“shit, you scared me.”

“sorry.”

assuming she was just wanting to use the bathroom you awkwardly smiled and brushed past her.

“wait.”

you stopped and turned to look at the careful look she had in her eyes.

“did i do something?”

“what do you mean?”

“well, i don’t know i feel like you’ve been acting weird around me lately.”

you wanted to scoff.

“i haven’t been acting weird.”

“oh come on,” she looked at you, expecting you to correct yourself.

“what? i haven’t.”

“you just seem like i’ve pissed you off or something.”

you sighed and paused before speaking. “well, i thought you were acting weird around me and i don’t know what i’ve done.”

“me? you haven’t done anything.”

“then why is there this distant tension thing happening between us? what’s changed!?”

her expression changed and she looked like she’d been caught or something.

“we’re not distant.”

“ellie… we used to talk about everything and now i feel like you spend more time with dina than me.” you immediately regretted saying it.

“am i not supposed to hang out with dina? i thought you were friends.”

“we are and you can, i didn’t mean that i meant, fuck. i just meant it feels like you’re pulling away from me but if you like her or something then i’m sorry for bringing it u–“

“woah woah, i don’t like her? what gave you that idea? and why…” her voice trailed off.

you froze.

“why would you care if i did?”

“i wouldn’t,” you shot out a bit too quickly.

“tell me.”

“no, it’s nothing! forget i said anything.”

“i know when you’re lying,” she said, taking a step towards you.

you sighed. “fine. i like you, ellie. as in more than a friend.”

the corners of her mouth twitched upwards but she cleared her throat to compose herself.

“why didn’t you tell me before?”

“it’s not an easy thing to confess,” you said, starting to feel like an idiot. a smile broke out on her lips.

“what?” you prodded, scowling slightly.

“i’m glad you told me.”

“okay…”

“i like you too.” your knee buckled a little.

“what?”

“i like you.”

“then why the fuck did you stop talking to me?!” her face switched back to panic for a split second before she grabbed your hands.

“i freaked out, i’m sorry. i wasn’t thinking. but i’m not fucking with you, i swear.”

you studied her face. you caught her eyes sneak a glance at your lips briefly.

“okay, i believe you.”

her freckled cheeks blushed and her eyes squinted as she smiled.

“so… can i kiss you?” she whispered.

“yes,” you whispered back.

she softly lifted your chin and placed a kiss on your lips whilst your hands found her waist.

“what’s taking so lo– oh fucking finally!” dina’s laugh snapped you two apart and you covered your mouth with your hand, slightly embarrassed at getting caught.

“as happy as i am for you both, you’re missing the best part of the movie. hurry up.”

dina disappeared back into the living room and you and ellie looked at each other. you had nothing to worry about after all.

[kaiandels]

Two Hearts pt.2: Ellie Williams X Reader

🐚

part 1 - part 2 - part 3 - part 4 - part 5 - part 6

‿︵‿︵୨˚̣̣̣͙୧ - - ୨˚̣̣̣͙୧‿︵‿︵‿︵‿︵୨˚̣̣̣͙୧ - - ୨˚̣̣̣͙୧‿︵‿

warnings: crisis abt 🏳️‍🌈, a bit of angst (but Dina is there to make you feel better 🤎), religious tr4uma, mild swearing , y/n having a very long dialogue, and NO INTIMACY displayed yet. YET! okay?

PROOFREAD! (for the first time in forever~)

p.s: this is going to be a tad bit emotional. i mean, “denial” is obviously caused by a root of bottled-emotions right? and thank you for liking pt. 1 🥹 and i’m very sorry if Ellie isn’t really present in this part, this is supposed to be about the reader and the reader only. But she’ll appear in the next part I promise!

After the wonderful moment that you shared with Ellie, you found yourself trapped in a void that constantly held you down. You couldn’t tell anyone, there is some sort of chain that you felt around your throat that makes it so hard to speak. It’s almost as if you’re choking on the air that was supposed to keep you alive. And what makes it harder is that Ellie already left, your source of calmness. Not even because it’s getting late, it’s because her date messaged her that “she wants to give it another try”. But it’s no one’s fault really. If anything, you felt as if it was your fault because you couldn’t admit to yourself that Ellie was the one you really loved. But you shut down that feeling everytime, because you always thought that it was wrong.

Your shaky breaths led you to feel panic, you wanted to call Ellie. But you knew that you can’t because she genuinely wanted to fix the relationship between her and her date because according to her, it was going pretty well until she “Fucked Up” by mentioning you too much. You understood that. So well, even. But why did that feel like you just got punched on the chest? You shook your head and let your mind calm down even just for a second which led you to message your beloved friend, Dina. God knows that you need her right now.

You finally burst out in laughter. Talking with Dina always felt so bittersweet, she always made situations much more lightweight for you even just temporarily. And you will always forever be grateful for her. You always thought that Jesse was such a lucky man. They were a perfect pair. And secretly, Jesse and Dina were rooting for you and Ellie. They have always envisioned double dates with you and Ellie or even when in the future, when you both have families… they imagined the get-together’s on Christmas, Newyear’s, Halloween, or any holiday for that matter. And they were frustrated, and even upset just by the thought of knowing that you both were struggling to admit to yourselves that you both loved eachother in no other way that a man or woman could ever do.

“Sweetie?” you heard Dina’s soothing voice knocking on your door. Swiftly standing up as you opened the door jumping in to her arms sobbing. “Aw… poor baby. Okay, okay, okay.. let’s get over to the couch okay? Sit down and i’ll open some wine and a huggeee tub of icecream for us. Alright?” you nodded and smiled as you felt Dina’s soft fingers wipe your tears away. You both went to the living room as Dina assisted you to sit down. You told her it was fine, and there was really no reason for her to “baby” you like this. “Nuh-uh, today is about you. And besides, I get to hear about the stupid things Ellie said… or done.” You laughed as Dina brought 2 glasses of wine and the tub of icecream.

“So, what happened with Ellie?” Dina asked giving you a spare spoon while opening the tub of icecream, revealing your favorite flavor. “Dina, thank you so much. That’s my favorite!”. You said smiling at her as you scooped a spoon-full for yourself. “No problem. You know what they say, Icecream does help a lot with negative emotions.” You smirked in agreement and took a bite, moaning at the pleasant taste on your mouth. “So? what happened?” You sighed folding your lips in to a thin line and finally ranting your life away.

“It’s not what Ellie did. It’s what she made me feel. I’m so confused Dina, so fucking confused. I’m constantly trying to push my feelings away for women because I have no guts to face it and admit it to myself. I don’t want to do it anymore. Trust me, I really fucking don’t. But it’s just so hard. I’ve been raised in a household where everything from my childhood changed, I couldn’t buy toys that involved cars because they were too “boyish” or I couldn’t wear what I used to wear because I “looked like a man”. And the people… God, the fucking people. They always tell me that it’s wrong, that it’s against God’s words but proceeds to do much worse things. It’s like they’re only religious when they see something they hate. And the expectations thrown at me that I should be able to marry a man, have 3 children, and live in a white house with plants and flowers with wooden floors near a beach in California. I know it sounds perfect, I know it sounds ideal… But what if I don’t want to live that life with a man? Or live that life at all? What if I want to live that life with a woman? What if I don’t want to live in California near a beach? What if I want to live in a farm, peaceful enough but not far from civilization. What if I don’t want children? What if I don’t like them at all because they are annoying and loud and hinders me from actually living up to the life that I want. Not what they want. I fucking want! Like, seriously? 3 children? Do they think i’m made of metal or something? I know that this sounds ridiculous because I have Xavier, and my parents like him a lot. And I WAS happy with him. But he’s a cheater and a liar… And i’m more happy with-“

“Ellie. You’re more happy with Ellie.” Dina smiled bitterly as she moved her hands from her lap to your face, caressing your soft skin slowly. “Look, you don’t have to feel obligated to fulfill your parents frustrations. It is not your duty and will never be. You don’t have to listen to them especially if it’s not what you want for yourself.” Dina added, studying your face as you seemed so vulnerable. “I know, thank you.” You forced a smile, trying to contain any tears that were threatening to fall from your face. “How does she do it?” you asked. “Do what?” Dina asked tilting her head to the side. “Love women? Without giving a care about what people might say or throw at her?” Dina laughed softly hitting your arm. “Hey! what was that for?” You giggled, taken aback by Dina’s sudden happiness. “It’s just… It’s fuckin’ Ellie. Alright? She doesn’t give a flying fuck. Even back then? Nuh-uh Sis, you’re not getting a reaction from her. And besides, last time I checked, she doesn’t believe in God. But if you’re seriously asking, I don’t know either.” Dina shrugged and laughed at her own ramble.

You grabbed Dina’s hands and intertwined them with yours. “I’m having a really hard time, Dina.” Dina looked at her hands and looked back at you. “I know, Sweetie”. She paused for a moment to think then added to her sentence. “I personally think that you should talk to Ellie about this to clear your mind. She’s the gayest of our group, everything you’re going through right now? She has probably gone through already. But, about Xavier? Honestly he’s no good and i’m not trying to throw you shade but I think you’re just with him ‘cause it pleases your parents.” Dina said tightening her grip on your hand and rolling her eyes from the thought. “I mean, you’re not lying…” You said laughing as you caressed her hand softly.

“But seriously… You really should go talk to her. But if you don’t want to, that’s fine either. You’ll figure it out, Sweetie. Baby steps, alright?” Dina said flashing you her most beautiful smile that have always made you melt in all the right ways.

“I will talk to her.”

you didn’t

(yes the wallpaper is the reader and Ellie)

special tag: @gold-dustwomxn 🫶🏻

[lcvemalfcy]

Mission Accomplished || D.M

summary: pansy and blaise make it their mission to get y/n and draco together

pairing: draco x fem!reader

warnings: fluff, not sure abt anything else — please comment if I missed something!!

word count: 1.6k

a/n: pls ive been writing this since the beginning of feb but i didn’t know how to end it off

draco had taken an interest in you ever since you had laughed at a joke he mumbled during class, with no intention of being heard. he turned to the owner of the laugh, to see you sitting next to your friend with your hand over your mouth, trying to conceal your giggles. that’s when he decided that your laugh was now his favorite sound in the world and that he wanted to hear it more.

he hadn’t made his crush on you known, besides to blaise. he rarely even talked with you before, but he wanted to change that this year. he started off by greeting you whenever you two passed each other in the halls, to initiating small conversations with you during your shared classes, and now he was joining you in the library to read after he ‘coincidentally’ shared the same reading spot as you.

pansy and blaise entered the library together, in search of a book they needed in order to start on their astronomy project. they both walked to the aisle where the book would be found, pansy’s fingers gliding over the spines of the books as she searched for the one in particular. “do me a favor and help me find it?” she spat out to blaise, irritated that he stood there staring off at something she could care less about.

“is that draco with y/n?” blaise asked instead, noticing the familiar blonde boy sitting at a table across from you. this immediately caught pansy’s attention as she averted her focus from the bookshelf in front of her to the table you two sat at. “no way!”

“they are so into each other,” pansy silently squealed as she watched you burst out into giggles due to some awful joke draco had made, you seemed to have a thing for his jokes. “draco’s liked her for months now.” a grin appeared on blaise’s face, trying to hold in his laughter at draco’s lame attempt at flirting with you.

“and he hasn’t made a move on her yet?” pansy questioned. blaise shook his head side to side to answer her question when an idea suddenly entered her brain. “blaise we have to do something!”

“like what?” blaise was confused, unsure of what pansy meant. “forget the project, we have to set them up! mission y/n and draco!” pansy exclaimed. she excitedly grabbed blaise’s hand and dragged him to a table far from yours to create a plan, while blaise internally groaned, knowing how passionate she could become when it came to stuff like this.

being a prefect always was an advantage. and luckily for pansy and blaise who were both prefects, this made it easy for them to execute their plan.

✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:*  *:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧

one foggy night, you threw a jumper and sweats over your body, preparing for your late night stroll around the castle. you liked to do this whenever you couldn’t fall asleep, finding that a walk seemed to be relaxing and calm the thoughts running through your head.

you exited your dormitory quietly, being careful enough to not wake your sleeping dormmates. you walked down the stairs and into the common room, feeling chills run up and down your body as you felt the temperature drop. you made it across, about to exit the room when you walked straight into something — no, someone.

“sneaking out again, y/n?” there stood pansy ahead of you. she kept a straight face, slightly raising her eyebrow in attempt to intimidate you.

“weren’t you just asleep?” you looked back and pointed towards the steps to the dormitories, confused as to where she came from. she was asleep in the dorm, right? 

“I’m sorry but I’m going to have to give you a detention,” she stated as you gave her a questioning look. “you’re not serious, are you? you know I’ve snuck out a million times already and never gave me one before,” you tried to reason with her.

“and that’s exactly why I should be giving you one, you’ve snuck out one too many times y/n. meet me for detention in snape’s classroom. saturday, 5PM, and don’t be late.” she left so quickly and was already gone before you could question her sudden change in opinion.

meanwhile, draco sat in the common room one afternoon, looking back and forth between papers as he copied goyle’s homework. with one question left, he was almost done and turned to glance at goyle’s paper one last time when it was suddenly snatched away from underneath him.

“what the hell?!” draco looked up to see blaise holding onto the piece of parchment he desperately needed in order to complete his assignment.

“really, draco? cheating? I’m absolutely flabbergasted and disappointed in you!” blaise overexaggerated and flailed his arms around, causing draco to furrow his brows in confusion. “I’m giving you a detention for going against your academic honesty!” blaise sighed and crossed his arms, dramatically shaking his head at his friend.

“what are you on mate? did you not just copy off of his homework before me?” draco was irritated as blaise prevented him from finishing his homework. “I don’t know what you’re talking about. now, meet me in snape’s classroom at 5PM on saturday for your detention.” and with that, blaise left, not giving draco a chance to hex him.

✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:*  *:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧

it was now saturday, a few minutes before the clock struck 5PM. you were making your way to snape’s classroom, pissed that you had to spend your free time in detention.

arriving at your destination, you opened the door and entered the classroom, curious as to what pansy had planned for your detention. the first thing you noticed was an empty classroom, before turning to the back corner and spotting your favorite blonde. “draco? what are you doing here?”

“blaise gave me a bloody detention for ‘going against my academic honesty,’ whatever that means. you?” he raised an eyebrow as he waited for your reply. “pansy caught me trying to sneak out.”

he slowly nodded as you took a seat beside him, “don’t you find it odd that blaise and pansy never give slytherins detentions, especially not their own friends. and the one time they do, it happens to be on the exact same day at the exact same time?” he questioned as you thought it over.

“you’re right, that is a bit odd.”

after waiting a few more minutes for blaise and pansy to arrive, draco went to grab his bag off the floor as he stood up. “I have better things to do and seeing that they’re late, I’m going to go do those other things. care to join?”

“lead the way, malfoy.” you grinned at him, gesturing your arm towards the door. he made his way over to the door, you following right behind him. you waited for him to open it, yet that never happened.

“the door won’t open,” he concluded after a few moments of him rattling the doorknob.

“what do you mean the door won’t open?”

“it means, the door won’t open.” you lightly shoved him out of the way, pulling out your wand and muttering alohomora. you became frustrated when you went to open the door and the lock still wouldn’t budge.

after multiple attempts to open the door, both of you realized it was no use. you guys were locked in.

you found yourself sitting on the floor besides draco, talking with one another for hours on end as you wore his jumper. he had politely offered it to you when he noticed you shivering due to the cold dungeon air, in which you denied it at first, but he kept on insisting.

you started drifting off, his words started twisting into gibberish and his voice became muffled. draco felt his heart warm when your head fell onto his shoulder. “oh c’mon y/n, don’t fall asleep on me.”

“I’m sorry, it’s just your jumper is so comfy and warm,” you lightly spoke as you snuggled closer into his body. draco thought his heart was about to burst.

suddenly, the door opened and entering the room was snape, who only stared at the two of you when he noticed his two students just casually sitting on his classroom floor. the sudden noise made you bolt awake.

“out.” his voice was curt and blunt, causing you and draco to rush to your feet. you hurriedly exited the room as draco mumbled a “sorry professor.”

you and draco ran down the hall, hardly able to contain your laughter when you entered the common room.

sitting on the couches before you and draco were pansy and blaise, who wore amused looks upon draco’s and your appearance.

“nice jumper, y/n.” blaise wiggled his eyebrows at the two of you when you and draco finally realized what was going on. “they did this on purpose, didn’t they?” draco spoke up beside you.

“I’m gonna get those little gits.” you ran straight for pansy as she yelped and ran towards the dorms, you following straight behind her.

✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:*  *:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧

the following day at breakfast, pansy was fangirling over the sight of you two walking down the hall hand in hand. “mission accomplished, blaise! you were actually a good partner, we should do it again sometime. ooo how about daphne and theo?”

truth be told, you were glad blaise and pansy had done that as it allowed you and draco to realize your feelings for one another.

what you did not like, was the fact that pansy and blaise had the audacity to take credit for your relationship with draco. and while it may be true, you would never admit it to them out loud.

[iwadori]

Hiiii can i request prompt 53 with tsukki? My annoying cousin u may know @chibiiichan(i cant tag her its a surprise) recommend ur account and well she never been right more than now I LIKE UR ACC TOO URM JUST TAG HER IN THE POST (bcs its actually her birthday next week monday so....the least i could do this bcs she likes tsukki and shes recently talk abt the iwazumi story of yours....lmao shes cringe but in the same time got mad n i was besides her hearing her whining like bruh 'its 1 am'...i know i should buy something for her but she got spoiled enough 💅...that mf-) thank you ✨

‘ALWAYS AND FOREVER’

TSUKISHIMA X READER

2K WORDS

GENRE: ANGST,FLUFF

TW: SLIGHT AMBIGIOUS MENTION OF SUICIDE/ASSISTED DEATH, AND DEATH, CURSING (IN MY A/N)

THIS IS FOR @chibiiichann Happy birthday, I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS (BECAUSE I HATE IT :D ) SOOOOO YEAH I HOPE YOU ENJOY YOUR BIRTHDAY.

NOT PROOFREAD AT ALL. EXPECT SLIGHT MISTAKES

You were dying. You knew it. Your husband, Kei, knew it. Even friends you haven’t spoken too since high school knew it.

So why did you all pretend that everything was okay?

5 year old Y/N:

You were running around your neighbourhood park chasing after butterflies, without a care in the world. As you were frollicing in the grass, you manage to trip over a rock tumbling to the ground scraping your knee making it bleed. Looking down at your slightly injured knee, your lip begins to quiver which eventually leads to wails of tears streaming down your face.

“you don’t have to cry you know?” said a slightly quiet voice towering over you. Above you was a boy, quite tall with a fat pair of glasses, golden eyes and a head full of blonde locks.

“Well when I get hurt, I cry” you say matter oh factly (is that the phrase?) rubbing your nose as you sniffle. He held out a hand to you, which you immediately took shooting upwards and brushing yourself off.  

The boy, after looking at you wildly, turns around and walks back to the actual park. “Oi wait,” you call at the boy swiftly following him “aren’t you going to ask my name?”

“no.” he says simply, proceeding to walk ahead.

“well my names Y/N L/N pleasure to meet you,” you say jumping in front of him so he doesn’t move, waiting for him to tell you his name...which he doesn’t. “you don’t have to be so rude you know”  

“I’m not being rude” he says stiffly “ it’s just my brother says not to speak to strangers” a smirk appears on his face to say ‘you can leave me alone now.’  

As if on cue, his brother approaches the both of you given the boy a slap on the back making him cringe “Hey Kei, who’s the friend you’ve made here?”  

“My name is Y/N L/N and I'm here to be KEI’s best friend!” you said putting the emphasis on the word Kei after just learning that was the blondes name.  

Kei rolled his eyes and sighed saying “nii-chan can we go home now” he folded his arms in annoyance.

“No Kei, you’ve got to get to know your new found friend Y/N-Chan right?” his brother said teasingly, knowing it was the last thing Kei wanted to do.

“Yes ofcourse!” you say with a toothy grin, dragging Kei along with you to his demise.

Until the sun went down, you spent the rest of your time with Kei getting to know eachother (well him getting to know you more, since you did all the speaking.) Regardless of his previous annoyance in getting to know you in the first place, Kei would be lying if he said he didn’t want to know you now.

As the sun was setting, Kei’s older brother (who’s name you learned was Akiteru) called him to tell him he had to go home because dinner was ready. Before he left, you grabbed his hand and wrapped your pinky finger around his saying “As long as we shall live, we will always look out for eachother as we are forever bestfriends, agreed?”

back to present -  

In some odd way, this was Kei’s way of looking out for you. He knew what you had was uncurable and would weaken you even more as the days go by, so pretending like nothing was wrong seemed to be best in his eyes.  

Everything you and Kei did was a game or some nostalgic act that you once did when you were children. It was sweet to say the least, seeing Kei all engrossed and determined to make you happy.  

Your alarm rings snapping you out of you daydream, ‘it was time for medicine’ you thought with your face scowling at the thought. Immediately on time, as always, Kei comes In the room with all your medicine thats needed.

“Aren’t you my perfect little nurse Kei” you say teasingly giving him a wink, laughing as you see his face turn red.

“Do you have to do this every time y/n?” he asks rolling his eyes at your childish behaviour.

“Oh I'm just showing love to my best and favourite nurse” you continue laughing at your own words

“Im your only ‘nurse’” he deadpans giving you your medicine as you talk.

“Well that is more reason to make you the best nurse.” you say smiling.

Silence falls between you, and you stare down at your arm watching as your husband gives you the medicine making you frown. “Do we have to keep doing this?” you ask which is probably the 1000th time you’ve asked.

“Of course we do Y/N as I’ve said yesterday and the day before that and the day before that it-”

“But do we really?” you interrupt “I can’t keep doing this. You can’t keep doing this.”

“Do you doubt me Y/N, I can do this forever” he says “ I can take care of you forever”

“But I don’t wan-”

“I’m finished, I’m going to start on dinner” he gets up and leaves the room yelling “I’ll call you when it’s done.”

Sometimes you and Kei have these conversations. And all the time it ends the same way. You complain, he ignores and then you go and have dinner.

You can understand why he doesn’t want to have this conversation. Who would want to hear about their partners complaints about practically being alive. Kei was torn, ever since he met you all he wanted to was to keep you happy. But could he compromise his own happiness for it.

15 year old Y/N - flashback

“Kei Kei, aren’t you excited!” you yell smiling widley

“Excited for what?” he asks, amused by your enthusiasm “it’s just highschool.”

“Well it’s a new highschool! Karasuno high school, to be exact.”

“And that is still just a school.” he says

“Not just any! That’s the school nii-chan went too, and even tho he lie-”

“Let’s not talk about it Y/N” he murmurs “we should go now, don’t want to be late on our first date.”

Going to Karasuno was fun, at the start everyone was pleasant and nice. But after a week or two when you and Kei were still stuck to eachother like glue, people weren’t so pleasant. Kei was like a pop idol, being gorgeous and over 6ft at just the age of 15, caused alot of attention, especially when he was always around you.

At the start, the hate you got was bearable, it was the petty bitchy notes in your locker or just people blatanly talking badly about you infront of you. People didn’t do it when you weren’t around Kei, so when he had volleyball practice (which you were so excited that he joined the team) you were a big target for the bullies to come around.

Kei didn’t really know of the bullying that happened towards you, especially since he was mainly in practice or not around when it happened. But one day in practice he heard some of his teammates, kageyama and hinata who seemed to talking about a student in one of their classes that was always getting picked on by the other girls in the year.

“Yeah and I heard that Nana-san was planning on getting her and her friends to attack Y/N-san soon.”  said Hinata

“Shrimpy, who are they planning on attacking?” Kei asks to make sure he just heard the ginger correctly.

“Oh this lovely person in our class their name is Y/N-san” he says, looking at Kei’s reaction he also asks “Why? Do you know them?”  

Kei doesn’t respond, and immediately leaves the gym, ignoring Hinata’s and the other members of the teams yells of ‘Where are you going tsukishima.’ He didn’t care, he just had to get to you.  

He searched all the classes, asking every student if he knew where you were. Someone directs him to the toilets, where he burst through the door to see the other girls in your year surrounding you and beating you up.  

“What the fuck are you doing to them?” he yells startling the girls.

“T-T-Tsukishima-san" one girl says “It’s not what it looks like.”

“Oh fuck off” he says, with them still frozen in shock “I said go!”  

“And don’t think I don’t know your names either” he calls after them.

He rushes towards your bruised body on the ground and cradles you gently, confused on what to really do. “Oi Kei,” you say weakly catching his attention “I would’ve won if you didn’t come to stop the fight.” you joke making him scoff.

“Whatever you say Y/N.”

After you heal up, Kei already told on the girls that beat you up getting them suspended, and you explain how they were treating you because of their infatuation of him. And how they only did it when he wasn’t around.

Once he learns this information, he decides to quite the volleyball team, to your surprise. But you demands on making him not quit were ignored, as he excused it by saying “I have to make sure you’re always alright remember, and if that means quitting some volleyball team then so be it.”

That was one out of the many times that Kei put his happiness before yours.

Flashback over.

When you first got diagnosed, Kei was immediately researching on it as it was a very rare condition. But sadly, he only found what the doctor already told you both. It was uncurable and your immune system and your body will weaken as the days go by.

Which it did, you were a shell of your past self. It was always shocking for Kei to see, especially with you only being 25. ‘It wasn’t supposed to be this way,’ but he never let you see his sadness.

Whenever you knew Kei was sad you always reminded him “Kei, I may be dying but please don’t cry over me” every time you said, there was a slight undertone of humour in your voice which always worked in boosting Kei’s spirit.

AN: IVE GOTTEN TO THE POINT WHERE I HATE THIS SOOO IM SORRY IN ADVANCE FOR THE SHITTING RUSHED ENDING IM GOING TO PROVIDE FOR YOU LOL.

The days passed and the years went by, and you and Kei were still alive and kicking it. Doing your daily routine of you making some joke, Kei giving you your medicine and then you eating dinner. You eventually stopped complaining, realizing and remembering your promise you gave to Kei at 5 years old in that park. “As long as we shall live, we will always look out for eachother as we are forever bestfriends, agreed?”

Of course you had your rough days, everybody did and it was even harder being sick with a terminal illness. But having Kei to guide you through the storm made It better for you.

However, Kei isnt a miracle worker. He couldn’t save you, noone could. And you both knew that. That didn’t mean it made it any easier when the medicine stopped working and your pain got too hard to bear. Kei couldn’t watch you do this anymore, “the choice is yours” he said with tears in his eyes.  

So you knew what you had to do, you got in your bed pulling Kei with you, and letting him envelope you in a big hug as you both cried.

“I love you,” you say “You know that right?”

“Of course I know that, idiot” he replies “And I love you.”

“Always and forever?”

“Always and forever.”

AN: how did I END UP CRYING WHILST WRITING THIS WHEN IT MADE NO FUCKING SENSE, I WAS TRYING TO DO THIS COOL NOTEBOOK (I HAVENT EVEN WATCHED THE NOTEBOOK) ENDING WHERE ITS AMBIGIOUS AND SHIT AND I JUST GIVE UP OKAY? I APOLOGISE LOOOOOOL. I HOPE YOU ENJOY ATLEAST A SENTENCE OF THIS AT LEAST.

[doyelikehaggis]

oh god I want to ask abt many of ur wips but the one that v obviously stands out the most to me is valerine and the twins !! that ficlet u did for this concept with teh mb still lives in my head rent free so ofc I want to know how that fic is going. also 40 (bc what a concept !!) and/or 53 <33

I thought that would be the one that most interested you haha, of course you can know how it's going, I am very pleased that it lives rent free in your head. You obviously know the basic concept, which is that Valerie and Caroline get full custody of the twins, so we'll jump right into the snippet instead!

"I want to go for full custody." 

Valerie stops. Her hands are drenched in bubbles and soapy water, a plate in one hand and the sponge in her other. She looks more domestic than Caroline ever thought she'd see her, hair tied back loosely and wearing one of Caroline's softest plaid shirts. It's orange and pink. It's a good look on her. 

The smile that had been caught on her lips just a second ago has faded slightly as she processes what Caroline just said. In all fairness, it's a big thing to just casually throw out into a normal conversation while washing the dishes. 

"Okay," Valerie says slowly. "Um... Okay, that's a pretty big deal." She lets the plate slide back into the sink and turns to Caroline, shaking her head. "I mean, I think you should."

Caroline blinks. She was expecting a more alarmed response; usually, in tv shows and books, when one person says they want to get full custody of a kid, it's a big deal for the partner, right? They're not sure they can handle it, they're not sure their relationship will be able to get through it, all of that. 

Flat out agreement wasn't quite on the list. 

"Really?" she asks, straightening up with a surge of joyful hope. "You do? You're not -- you don't want to -- to talk about it or anything?" 

Valerie frowns, her brow wrinkling. Caroline's always liked the little crease it makes between her eyebrows. Not when she first met her, that was more satisfying, knowing she had stumped her. But recently, it's become a fond thing rather than one for her to be triumphant over. 

"Caroline, they're your kids," Valerie says. "If you want full custody of them, it's not my place to have a say in that." 

The hope is quickly pricked with a sharp little pin and bursts, deflating with a sad whistle. It weirdly stings her, too.

"That's... No, that's not how this works," Caroline says, weirdly hurt. Maybe she had been expecting a bit more hesitation surrounding the idea, but this feels worse. 

Valerie seems to be realizing that. Confused, grabs a towel from the sideboard and starts drying her hands, while she says, "It isn't?" 

"No!" Caroline laughs in disbelief. She steps forward and takes one of her partially dry hands in between both of her own. "No, it's absolutely not. Val, you are a big part of my life now. You know that, right?" 

Valerie hesitates now. Her mouth opens like she wants to agree, but her just runs along her teeth while that little crease in her eyebrows grows deeper. 

"Well, yeah," she quickly says after a moment, with Caroline's exasperated stare focused on her. "Of course I do. But I wouldn't stand in the way of any decisions you wanted to make about your kids, that's why I just thought this was more you telling me rather than something for us to talk about." 

Caroline's realizing that Valerie's response wasn't because she doesn't want to be part of the family. She just doesn't think that she is part of it. 

Which... actually hurts even more, Caroline finds. Because maybe that's on her. Has she been making her feel left out? Like she's a separate part of her life from Lizzie and Josie? That was the last thing she wanted. 

"Valerie," Caroline says seriously, and her eyes widen a little with worry. "Almost every decision that I make for my future is going to include your voice, because it's going to affect yours, too. That's what being in a relationship is, remember? So, if I tell you that I want to get full custody of Lizzie and Josie, I'm asking you to talk it through with me before anything goes ahead. Are you okay with having that conversation?" 

She has never seen Valerie look so stumped for what to say before. It's the first time they've had a conversation like this, one that's really going to affect both of them.

But even though she has that fight-or-flight, ready to flee at a moment's notice look in her eyes that she often gets, Valerie nods slowly. Then her face breaks out into a smile, and she breathes out a soft laugh, looking down. 

"Yeah," she says. "Yeah, I would love that."

Now, 40! Hope living with Jeremy! It is certainly a concept, isn't it?? This comes entirely from the start of season 2 of Legacies, when no one remembered Hope but she was sticking around Mystic Falls to help with the Malivore monsters. When watching that, my mum and I had been trying to guess who she was going to live with, because surely she wouldn't be living on her own and she couldn't stay at the school, so we came up with the theory that she was going to be living with Jeremy, who, as far as we knew, would have to have somewhere to live while he was in town. And then I decided that if she was going to be living with Jeremy, they would train together, he would help with some Malivore monsters, then they would slowly bond because Jeremy was actually kinda friends with Kol at one point. And then we have big brother Jeremy! Have a little snippet:

There's a loud thwacking noise from the back garden as Hope walks into the kitchen. She pauses momentarily in her sleepy state, registers the noise, then continues going about grabbing a bowl and her box of cereal. It's nearly empty, she finds, to her dismay. 

Once she's poured the last of the milk and tossed the carton, she opens up the back door and steps out into the garden. Her eyes adjust quickly to the darkness and hone in on the figure currently throwing a staff around at a tree like it has personally offended him.

"Are you ever worried that one day it's going to fight back?" she asks curiously. 

Jeremy startles and nearly drops the staff in his haste to turn around to face her. 

"I mean, dryads and wood nymphs are actually a thing. Just so you know. That tree might have a family that probably wouldn't appreciate you hitting it repeatedly for fun."

She spoons cereal into her mouth as Jeremy laughs. Relieved that she isn't some Malivore monster sneaking up on him, he relaxes enough to double over, hands on his knees as he breathes heavily. For someone who's not exactly unfit or unathletic, he gets out of breath incredibly easily.

Tilting her head, Hope asks, "Have you ever considered that you might be asthmatic? You breathe like one."

"And you talk like your uncle," Jeremy quips back, still laughing at her comments. He groans, straightening back up as he adds, "But yes, I do have asthma. Thanks for your concern."

Hope's heart beats a little faster. It always does when her family is mentioned, more often now than before. The urge to get on the bus and go home to them in New Orleans is still there, no matter how much she tries to ignore it. She needs to focus on Malivore's monsters. But it's hard sometimes.

She smiles to herself, wondering if he's right. She hopes so. Uncle Kol was always her favourite. The thought that she could be making him proud with just a few words fills her with a kind of happy pride she hasn't felt since Uncle Kol told her she was just like him for causing trouble at the Salvatore School. 

Then she wipes it off her face like she always does whenever he casually talks about her family, straightens up against the doorframe, and says, "Maybe you should use an inhaler, then. I wouldn't want you dropping dead while we're fighting a monster." 

"Hasn't happened yet!" 

She rolls her eyes at him, something she also finds herself doing often these days. It's easier to ignore him and continue eating her cereal while he goes back to training. Clearly, he has no concern about dryads coming after him for revenge.

"Hey, do you wanna join?" Jeremy calls over to her. 

He offers the staff out to her, but she shakes her. Motioning her cereal with her spoon, she smiles again, and says, "I'm good. Just came down for this. You have fun freezing out here, though."

She turns back inside the kitchen as Jeremy chuckles and shakes his head at her. "Good morning to you too."

53 is a good choice, I very much enjoy that one as well. "Klayley Wedding" is pretty much what it sounds like; Klaus and Hayley are together and getting married. They waited a while to do so, so Hope is seventeen and being pulled out of the Salvatore School for a few days in order to be there for it. And she's bringing a date! Here is your preview:

"Come on, humour me," Lizzie whines as she fusses with the back of Hope's hair. Why she agreed to let her style it, Hope has no idea; it was definitely a moment of bad judgment, but at the same time, it was let her do it when she begged, or be forever resented for saying no. 

And having Lizzie Laughlin-Forbes resent you is not something anyone in the Salvatore School risks. It's signing a death sentence. 

Rolling her eyes, Hope goes to shake her head then quickly stops when Lizzie holds it firmly on both sides and glares at her in the mirror. "No moving until I'm done!" she reminds her. "I haven't spelled it yet, you'll mess it up."

"Have you ever considered going into hairdressing?" Hope asks dryly, glaring back halfheartedly. Really, she doesn't mind her helping her out. 

It's at least better than her having to worry about it herself. Though, Aunt Rebekah is not going to be happy that she didn't let her do it. It's why she's practically been avoiding her since getting to New Orleans. 

Lizzie laughs shortly, then says, "Nice try. You're not wriggling out of the question."

Hope doesn't admit that's what she was trying to do, but it definitely was the intention. Lizzie has been a broken record since she found out that Hope was bringing a date to the wedding. At first, she was offended that Hope hadn't asked her, but then saw Hope's reasoning when she pointed out that she and Josie were already going to be there because of their mom.

"It's not a big deal!" Hope says, finally at least acknowledging the question. 

Lizzie scoffs. "Oh, of course not. Except, it absolutely is, and you know that it definitely is to Rafael. You basically asked him to meet your family, Hope. That's a big deal to most people."

"Not to you or Josie." 

"We've known your family since we were born!" Lizzie protests. She stops whatever she was doing to Hope's hair to stare at her in the mirror. "Rafael is head over heels in love with you, any person with barely working eyes -- or ears -- knows that. Except you, apparently!"

Hope shakes her head, once again forgetting Lizzie's rule. Lizzie quickly holds her head in place again, but she's too focused on the conversation at hand to lecture her again. 

"Maybe this is your way of letting him down without having to actually tell him!" Lizzie continues, obviously trying to get under her skin. "After all, you've invited him to meet your family, who are probably going to threaten him at every turn. Especially your dad, because of the whole macho alpha werewolf thing, you know?"

"My mom's actually the Alpha of the pack, not my dad," Hope corrects, but Lizzie brushes it off.

"After today, Rafael's probably not going to have any feelings for you anymore out of fear of your family, so, really, you won't have to do anything. I mean, it's smart -- a little cruel, but at least you don't have to do any of the hard work yourself, that's all up to your family--" 

"You make them sound terrifying," Hope protest with a touch of offence to her voice, staring up at Lizzie in the mirror. "They're not that bad. I actually think they'll like Raf." 

Lizzie raises an eyebrow. She's smiling.

"Is that because you want them to like him?" she asks slowly, and Hope groans, but Lizzie quickly presses on before she can interrupt, "Just admit you asked him to be your date because you like him!" 

"If I do, will you shut up and finish my hair so that we can go and meet Josie and Raf?" 

Lizzie lights up like a Christmas tree. She squeals excitedly, even though Hope technically hasn't even admitted anything yet. She's taking it as all the confirmation she needs. 

"I like him," Hope says anyway, and maybe she's smiling a little as well. "And yes, it would be convenient for me if my parents liked him before anything happened between us." 

"I knew it," Lizzie breathes out, shaking her head. She picks back up where she left off with Hope's hair as if nothing happened. "Now that that's over. Tell me, would your Aunt Rebekah mind if I borrowed that really gorgeous emerald bracelet she showed us yesterday?" 

Hope is laughing. Lizzie can't seem to figure out why, but honestly, Hope's just so happy in the moment that she can't help herself. For a moment on the way over to New Orleans, when everyone was packed onto that bus, shouting and arguing, she thought this was going to be a disaster. Someone would end up killing someone. 

There's still time for that, especially since neither she nor her mom have told her dad that she has a date. But Hope is finally living up to her name for once and is choosing to be hopeful that, actually, maybe everything is allowed to go right for once. 

God, writing those snippets took me so long, so apologies for the delay! But I actually enjoyed this a lot so thank you so much for giving me motivation! Who knows, I might actually finish writing them now! (God, now all I can think about is TVD and Legacies, I haven’t been here in ageeeees. Time to rewatch TVD season 1-6 and season 2 of Legacies, I think.)  

[heartjwi]

jeno w/ 5+18 (one is a ceo, the other a celebrity, you choose who is what), 6 and 20+22 i hope it isn't too much?

au: ceo!au + celebrity!au

trope: fake dating

prompt: “it’s just so hard not to fall in love with you.” + “did you hack into my hotspot?”

a/n: i acc love making ceo!au’s!! ive like written a drabble abt ceo!jeno back in the day lmao anyway hope u enjoy this luv xoxo

you never thought of the idea of being with a ceo from a company you’ve never even heard of but here we are. you remember the news so vividly like a fever dream. your social media was flooded with the article of you dating lee jeno, the ceo of neo corp.

you remember the day your manager suddenly broke the news to you about needing to date someone to save their company. needless to say, you were having none of that.

“excuse me- what?” you shrieked, dropping your shopping bags in shock. your manager winces at your voice. “i knew you’d react like this..” he murmurs, “but you have to. for the sake of their company please?” your manager pleads. “when can i meet this person?” you sigh, giving in. your manager smiles, “tomorrow at 12 pm sharp”

fast forward to the next day, you were dreadful as ever. your manager even told you to dress up nicely making you hate this situation even more. as you two arrive in the restaurant your manager set up, you looked around for any possible people that could be your fake boyfriend.

“over there at the corner” your manager points to a young man sitting alone. you took a glance at him and noticed he was actually good looking. the sharp features on his face like he was sculpted by the greek gods. he was breathtaking.  

“earth to y/n” your manager waves his hand over your face. “what” you blurt. “let’s go” he drags you to the table where the man you were staring at was sitting.

as you reached the table, the boy was much more handsome up close. the boy suddenly stands up and greets you with a bow. “hello, you must be y/n right? i’m lee jeno” he smiles, “huge fan of your work by the way” he adds. you smile back at jeno. “yes i am. nice to meet you” you shake his hand. 

“can we please get this over with? i still have to meet with someone after this” you tell your manager. your manager snaps out of his trance and tells the waiter for the menus. “yes of course” he ushers, sitting down and looking for something to eat. jeno on the other hand, was kind enough to pull your chair back so you can sit. “thank you” you tell jeno, who was now seated on his seat. 

“so let me get this straight” you start, “you want me to date you as PR to save your dying company?” you summarized the entire talk between you, your manager and jeno. jeno winces slightly at your choice of words but nods nevertheless. “it’s okay if you don’t want to, i’m sorry if I wasted your time” jeno scratches his neck out of habit, worried that you’d reject the offer. 

feeling a sense of pity, you reluctantly agree. “no” you shake your head, “i’ll do it” you affirm, shocking both your manager and jeno. “wha-” your manager splutters, “thank you! thank you so much for helping me and my company. I swear after this is over, you’ll never hear from me again” jeno excitedly reaches over and shakes your hand.

what kind of mess did you just got into?

—

months into the fake relationship with jeno, you’re almost certain you wanted to rip his hair out but at the same time, you don’t want to. not only you had to move from your cozy apartment to his crazy suite penthouse in one of the most expensive condo complexes in seoul. 

turns out his gentleman persona is only for the public eye and you had to learn that the hard way. when you would arrive at your new temporary house, the place was a mess. pizza boxes everywhere and almost every other night 5 people would come over and play games with him. 

thankfully though, you stayed in his spare bedroom that no one uses so basically you didn’t have to face jeno everyday till hours up to no end. only sometimes you have to evacuate and go back to your place in secret cause his friends are staying over. 

you’ve learned a lot about jeno during the past few months of being ‘together’ with him. you found out that he didn’t actually want to be the ceo after his father’s company but he wanted to be an architect instead. so as revenge, he didn’t take his now company seriously which is why you were in this situation. 

currently there was a blackout happening all over in jeno’s neighborhood over some disrupted lines. so you were chilling in his living room scrolling through your socials to pass some time in peace before jeno comes running in with his pajamas. 

“did you hack into my hotspot?” he immediately goes straight to the point making you furrow your eyebrows. “what are you talking about? i’m using my own” you showed him your phone. jeno grumbles and runs a hand over his untamed hair. “fuck, i think i forgot to pay my phone bill..” he utters the last part making you burst out laughing.

“please stop laughing” jeno pouts, standing like an anime girl unironically. making you laugh even more. “i’m sorry if i say this but it’s just so hard not to fall in love with you.” you blurt out, holding your stomach from laughing too much. jeno freezes at your words. “f-fall in love with me?” jeno stutters, pointing to himself.

you nod your head yes, smiling at the boy. “welp, there goes my secret. i have a secret crush on you” you snickered as you watched jeno’s face slowly turn red. 

[oh-theres-a-woman]

Headcanon Request; Wynne

Message: Hey lovely, Wynne here! Congrats on 500/600 followers you deserve it 💖👏🏻🎉 Anyways may I get a ship? I have really short blonde hair, dark brown eyes and I'm 5''2. I'm a very shy person when it comes to meeting new ppl, but eventually I open up and become very talkative. I'm friendly, I like joking around, I'm responsible but a little airheaded! Also I'm very anxious with most things in my life. I think I have a tendency to push ppl away 'cause of anxiety but I'm working on it.

I'm somewhere between having a low and a very high confidence lol. Usually I'm a very patient and peaceful person, I don't like starting fights but if there's no other option and politeness/kindness didn't work I'm willing to go bonkers! Also when it comes to defending those who are dear to me I don't hold back and become rather impulsive. Ppl say I'm a good adviser and listener, I love helping but sometimes I get way too serious abt it. Forgetting to take care of myself first.

(I swear this is the last one, part 3) BTW I FORGOT TO SAY THAT I'M PANSEXUAL! Okay, now we're good 🤣. Well idk if there's anything else to say that would help you out with the match up but, yeah! Anywho congrats again and I hope you're doing well lovely, love ya! 🥰💕💕 - Wynne

✨✨Thank you so much lovely. ✨✨ Hope you’re well and everything with life is treating you well. That you’re staying healthy and powering through school like the absolute champion you are. 💖 Love you @wynnemoon​

Isaiah Jesus 

The first thing he noticed about you in meeting was the presence you held. Isaiah had no idea how you knew the Shelbys or how come you were invited to the party that night. But you were a bit of a quiet wallflower. Unlike all the other Birmingham girls that were there who walked about like they owned the place. It was kind of like you were out of sorts. Something he felt the need to fix. He was so glad that he did, as well.  Although it took some time, he was sure you talked his ear off, but it wasn’t a bad conversation. It was actually perfectly pleasant. Enjoyable, in fact. You are bright and intelligent. Have a good heart and wicked sense of humour that had him laughing mid-conversation in bursts. 

Whoever said food was the key to a mans stomach, clearly hadn’t had you make them laugh before. That’s where he knew he was utterly smitten enough to ask you on a date. Right there and then. Your response was the cutest thing! With the progression of your relationship, he found himself falling for more aspects of you. One, being your openness about being a lover of everyone (pansexual) and accepting of anyone’s identity. You saw the person within everyone. And in a world where he was discriminated for the colour of his skin. It made him feel light inside just to know. You saw him for him. 

You made all the cruel thoughts in his head finally make sense. The advice given and the fact that you always listened so much more carefully than others made him appreciate you so much more.  

[dazaily]

karasuno first years using pick-up lines on their s/o

soo.. i’ve been wanting to write a karasuno head canon for ages, and i gonna write a hc which turned into a short fic that i’ll probably never finish... so this is the replacement. enjoy!!

description: so the the karasuno boiz were playing truth and dare in their changing room. and tanaka and nishinoya had dared your bf to use a pick-up line on you. 

warnings: implied nsfw. gender neutral reader. fluffy but sprinkled with swears. i was stressed writing this. long af. not proofread. 

. ⋆ 　 *  . 　· 　  ✫  　  ⋆

hinata shoyo

i’m sorry but, did u rlly expect our lil cinnamoroll to know what’s a pick up line?

he babie 🥺❤️

n e ways, it was finally his turn on their little game of truth and dare and nishinoya had dared him to use a pick up line on you.

“a pickup line??? what’s that? will it improve my volleyball skills??”

like i said a bABIE!!

nishinoya and tanaka needs to stop tainting my bbys mind.

“udk whats a pickup line??? how did u even end up with y/n.”

nishinoya is in shock.

and then the plan commenced.

their lil game of truth and dare ended up as a lil plan on getting u hinata to use a pick up line on you.

that night, u were walking home w hinata after club activities ended.

with noya, tanaka and kageyama trailing you, but we pretend they don’t exist.

“soo,, y/n”

“sup? y u acting all weird for? ur usually rambling abt volleyball by now.. u okay?”

“hoW DO THEY KNOW?? WHAT AM I GONNA DO NOW?? THEY TOLD ME TO SOUND NATURAL BUT THEY ALR KNOWS!! uGh my senpais are watching me, i gotta do them proUD!”

hinatas mind ran at 1,000km/h, it was insane. especially for someone who doesn’t usually use their brain.

“um, uM, Y/N! CAN U HELP ME HOLD SOMETHING?!?”

confusion.

that was the only thing u felt at the moment.

i mean u were alr infront of ur house, what’s the point of holding smt when u were leaving??

“whut”

conveniently, during ur moment of confusion, the only word u could form was “what”.

“m-m-mm-mY HAND!!”

hinata screeched at ur face

...

silence. whilst noya and tanaka facepalms in the bg

it took a moment, but ur brain finally computes what ur bf just said

“pFFFFFTT,”

ur first instinct was to release the phatest snort/wheeze. shane dawson is jealous. 

“y/nnnnnn~~ stop laughinggggggg”

hinata was now suffering from crippling embarrassment, as u wouldn't stop laughing no matter how much he pleaded.

omg imagine him all blushy and shiz akdkkoaw-- ok lets not get off topic

“ok,, okay, first of all, u could've just held my hand without asking? we’re dating? you don't need my permission to do smth we do everyday?? and, more importantly, who taught u that line u just used???”

u said half wheezing, half talking, struggling to convey wtv ur trying to say to ur bf.

lucky for u, he was strangely able to understand what u were saying, and he replies with a lengthy explanation of the entire situation. 

“ooo, so that's why noya, tanaka and kageyama have been following us,,”

“hOWD U KNOW??? NOYA-SAN OUR HIDING SPOT HAVE BEEN EXPOSED!!!”

as u left to go in ur house, he stops u by holding ur hand and gives u a peck on ur forehead. 

as he separates from u, he had the biggest smile plastered on his face, brightening the entire neighbourhood.

“goodnight y/n! i love you!”

kageyama tobio

erm, lbr this man would have 0 ideas in the field of flirting.

knowing this, our lovely 2nd year duo, decide its time for them to step in and help their junior in his dating life

despite it flowing extremely smoothly w/out their intervention

n e ways, so they forced the 1st years to play truth and dare w them.

when it finally came to tobio’s turn, the unfortunate child unknowingly picks dare which causes nishinoya to spring up.

“i have the perfect dare for you.”

commencing plan...

so nishinoya dares kageyama to say a pickup line to you, but since kageyamas a big baby in disguise, he dk any pickup lines.

bet he didn't even know any pickup lines, but that's not the point. 

so, being the mastermind he is, nishinoya told kageyama a perverted pickup line.

being the clueless innocent baby he is, kageyama decides to recite the pickup line he received from noya to u outside ur class.

“hey y/n,”

“hmm?”

“do you like dragons?”

“eh? why the sudden question? i guess so?”

“cuz i can see me dragon my balls on ur face.”

processing...

.

what the fuck.

it was like god hit the pause button on earth, like literally everyone just paused for a literal second, turning their head towards kageyama, trying to figure out who tf was the brave soul who said that. 

while still in shock, kageyama just stood there confused, as he was suddenly placed in the centre of attention for no reason. o there's a reason honey, a very good one.

“why's everyone looking at me,”

with that one sentence, the world went back to normal as if someone had hit the play button all of the sudden, leaving u to deal with the weirdly awkward situation u found urself in. 

“ummm... tobio.. do u have any idea what u just said.”

“uhh yeah, a pickup line.” 

at that moment, when he said that, it hit u.

“what did they do.”

“huh, what are u talking about??”

*insert confused kags*

“nishinoya and tanaka told u to do something right?”

“r u a psychic???”

despite being amazed at ur ‘psychic powers’, he immediately explains the situation, causing u to face palm so much ur face may be concave.

there are times where u appreciate ur dumbass bf being a ignorant qt, but times like this makes u wish he was a tad bit smarter.. 

debating ur options, u decided to explain the meaning of the pickup line he just used on u in public.

once hearing and understanding the meaning of the pickup line he used on u, his face lit up like a matchstick, shining bright red, stuttering madly, struggling to get even a word out.

“oh, um, well, im sorry for saying smtg so indecent to u in public, um ill make it up to u somehow,”

understanding him was a struggle due to the severe stuttering he was suffering from, but u managed somehow.

“nahhh, its cool, i should go lecture nishinoya for corrupting my precious baby though~~”

“b-b-b-bABY!?!?”

“hehe, yes ur my baby <3″

tsukishima kei

ugh this salty ass mfcker

honestly can't imagine him being forced into using a pickup line on his s/o

cuz, despite hw much we try to deny it, he is one smart mfcker,,,

but i think he would be curious how his s/o will react, so he would do it on his own will anyways.

umm, so this is how the situation went down.

it was another boring day, and the 2nd year duo was having none of that and decided too ensue a game of truth and dare with the 1st years.

this was how the c h a o s started.

he was trying to leave the game discreetly before he had to sell his soul to the devil. 

unfortunately for him, lady luck was not on his side, as he was chosen to do the next dare. 

“but wait a fucking minute, when the fuck did this become a game of dare or dare, when tf did freedom of choice decide to fuck off like that?”

plot convenience

so he was forced into a dare. 

the moment of dread came when tanaka stood up shouting he had a brilliant idea. and it all went downhill from there.

so tanaka dared tsukki to use a pickup line on his s/o. and his first reaction was no. 

“o come on, u never do anything romantic, i bet u haven't even held hands, sometimes i wonder how y/n’s still with u.”

“says the person who has never dated.”

tanaka shut ups. 

so somehow, he managed to get himself out of the situation. 

later that night, he couldn't stop thinking about pickup lines. he almost spent the whole night thinking about ur reaction. cuz volleyball is just a club, am i right..

he decided to use a pickup line on u tmrw, just to see ur reaction, not like he wants to use one, lmao that's lame, haha. a fucking tsundere.

the next day, during lunch, he left yams with the 1st year duo to go find u.

when he saw u, he immediately calls u. 

“hey, where's yams, u didn't tell me u wanted to eat with me today,”

“nah, i just had something to tell u.”

at this moment, tsukishimas heart was beating faster than ushijimas spikes.

“you know if u think about it we never stop tasting our tongues.”

“hmm, now that u said it ye--”

“how bout i taste urs for a change.”

since it was so unexpected, u had no idea how to react. 

as u returned to reality, u notice a slight pink on his cheeks.

u were gonna come back with a snarky comment, since it was rare he was so vulnerable(?) 

but ur plans were ruined when he glanced at u making eye contact, to check ur reaction. 

ur face bursts into the brightest red, hes ever seen. 

seeing ur extremely delayed reaction, he lets out a laugh, but immediately recollects himself. 

“it was a dare from tanaka.”

you were still bright red, but u felt the blush on ur face reducing after hearing the reasoning behind the line. 

“oh, haha, i was wondering what's up”

u said slightly dejectedly. 

he felt like he was just punched in the gut by guilt. 

“i was also curious about ur reaction, and i am satisfied to say the least.”

he leans down to ur height to whisper in ur ear, before initiating the kiss. 

ur blush returns almost immediately as u returned the kiss.

since yall were in school, he separed from the kiss after a few seconds. this is a place for knowledge, y'all nasties.

“welp, bye loser,”

after the kiss, he immediately return to yamaguchi, leaving u alone with ur thoughts. trying to escape from embarrassment.

he may be equal to the condiment on ur kitchen cupboard, but he still tries to make u happy, so appreaciate him and his efforts <3

yamaguchi tadashi

a babie uwuwuwu

pickup line what's that? hehe omf he's so cute

so how this about to go down. 

so truth and dare bla bla bla... ive written this exact thing 3 times please excuse my behaviour.

since he was bored, yamaguchi forced tsukki to join in on the fun together, a decision he would regret. 

soon it became yamaguchi’s turn, and everyone turned quiet due to the lack of dares they had or yamaguchi.

that was until the one and only nishinoya stood up. 

“hEY, u have a s/o right, how about u use a cheesy pickup line on her!!” *eyebrow raise*

while processing what nishinoya just said, yamaguchi’s face morphed into one of dread and fear, as he turns his head to tsukishima for help.

“u dragged us into this mess, i aint helping u.”

and there goes his only help, well it was his fault in the first place dragging him and his best friend into this mess. tsukishima u tsundere.

yamaguchi was on the verge of tears, thinking of excuses and ways he could get out of the god forbidden situation he brought upon himself. 

but the only thing he could think of was the worst case scenario, which was u breaking up with him.

looking at his senpais, he slowly faces the fact that there's no escape and accepts his fate. 

if this is the cause of the end of ur relationship together, it just means the gods don't want y'all together.

“idk any pickup lines....” 

this was his last attempt of escaping as he bids ur relationship farewell, already aware it was not gonna work. 

“thiS IS WHERE I COME IN, don't worry yamaguchi i am the encyclopaedia of pickup lines.”

ofc his senpais would know the cheesiest lines on the surface of this earth. despite insisting the earth is flat.

and so the dreadful event began. 

after school ended, otw to his club, he met up with u. with his senpais trailing behind stalking y'all, to see ur reaction.

“ugh out of all the pickup lines, they had to make me use the most overused one... im gonna cry,,, y/n i hope u don't leave me after this.”

well here goes nothing...

“hey y/n,,” extreme stutters that im too lazy to type out.

“hmm?”

“k-k-kiss me if im wrong,,, b-but dinosaurs still exist right?”

before he could even cringe at himself, u gave him a peck on his lips while smirking afterwards. 

yamaguchi proceeds to poof into redness after processing what had just happen, as u laugh maniacally in the background.

“u could've just asked for one, and tsukishima already told me everything so u don't need to explain,"

yamaguchi did not have the brain power to comprehend the situation at hand, as he was still affected from the kiss from earlier.

“i can't believe u think i would breakup with u because of something so trivial.. im kinda upset..”

finally coming back to reality, yamaguchi finally realises the situation he's in. 

“o-oh, i didn't mean to make it seem like i didn't believe in our relationship, its just that w--”

he gets cut off by u kissing him again.

when u separate, u began to laugh again. 

“hAHAHHA, ikik, i was just joking around, don't worry ill love u no matter what, now off u go to ur club ill see u tmrw.”

not knowing what to do or how to react, yamaguchi felt the need to do smtg before u left. 

“i love u, ill call u later tonight!”

[zevlors-tail]

1/3🔥Hello!! Congrats on your 300 followers!!! That’s amazing!!! :)))) You absolutely deserve it, your blog is just so hfkfjskalhdksla AnYwAy, I’d like to request a matchup please? I’m a female & prefer male & anyone whether it be a hero, villain or class 1-a is fine!! I’m 5’8 with long dark brown hair, light brown eyes (ok but I love my eyes) & a well-built body. My thighs r like low key thicc coz I have so much muscle(I do highly physically demanding sports) & kinda self conscious abt them—

2/3🔥I’m reserved when u first meet me but once u know me for a while I’ll be more open but it takes me a while coz I don’t trust people easily. ✨extroverted introvert✨ I like to hang out with people & I can be very loud & friendly but I need space as well coz my social energy depletes. I have a dark & sarcastic sense of humour & you’ll find me laughing at inappropriate times :P I’m analytical & don’t like it when people r unreasonable. I love watching people & studying them coz humans r just 3/3🔥so interesting. Love mountain climbing & rock climbing but also can be lazy, watch anime. Creative & spontaneous. Favourite colour is blue maybe lavender. A tomboy but love just dressing up fancily coz it’s just so fun^^; Not touchy feely but low key touch starved so yes pls cuddles but won’t be the one to start them. (But little spoon coz I’m always the 1 caring for everyone else T^T I just want love) Zodiac sign is Aquarius. Words: leaves, bonfire. Hope this wasn’t too long!! Stay safe💕

You reminded me of a certain character when you said you like to watch and study humans lmao (Izaya Orihara, is that you!?). I like to do the same! People watching can certainly be entertaining. Also, I just want you to know you are a precious bean. I love reading about all of your guys’ personalities and hobbies and favorite colors and everything. Y’all are so cute. <3 

I match you with: Dabi!

-Okay. So your best friend Twice introduced you to the league at some point and convinced you to join, and that’s how you met Dabi. Dabi doesn’t tend to say much anyway and since you’re super reserved around people when you first meet, you guys didn’t really hit it off right away. You even got into a couple spats. They were never too bad and it never turned physical, but you would both annoy the shit out of each other.

-That is, until the day you found out that the both of you shared the same sense of humor. Someone (let’s be honest, probably Toga or Tomura) said something slightly suggestive, and you made a twisted joke in response without really thinking about it. Dabi was sitting next to you at the bar at the time and immediately burst out in laughter, which made you laugh too. From then on he was more friendly towards you and actually tried to get to know you.

-A favorite pastime of yours is roasting people together with your sarcastic sense of humor. He thinks it’s absolutely hilarious when you reply sarcastically to something someone said, and he’ll constantly egg you on because of that. He especially loves it when you get sarcastic with Shigaraki. He could watch that all day.

-He also really likes to human watch with you. You guys play that game where you watch people conversing and try to imagine what sort of crazy conversation they could be having. The two of you have come up with absolutely crazy things, and it makes for a good laugh. But other times he’ll take it seriously if you want, and he’ll listen to you while you tell him about how these people are, what you think their personalities are like, and so on. Dabi is pretty sure you’re spot on 99% of the time.

-The more you spend time together the more he realizes he really likes you and everything about you, including the fact that you mountain climb and watch anime. He never knew nature could be so relaxing. The first time he goes rock climbing with you, he feels so alive. It’s so relaxing and freeing for him- please make him do this more. But he’s also just down to watch anime with you if that’s what you want. His favorite physical trait of yours is your eyes. They’re just so...light. He likes to watch the emotions in them, likes to see them glittering with happiness while knowing he’s the one who’s causing that. Of course, he would NEVER say that out loud, but you can see it in that smirk of his.

-Dabi is smart enough to know when you want and need cuddles, and he also knows that you probably won’t ask for them because you’re just not the type to. Which is perfectly fine, because he would much rather give cuddles than receive them! He definitely wants to be the big spoon all the time, and he’s happy to hold you for as long as you want. Honestly, both of you are touch starved. He cuddles with his arms wrapped around you tight and you like to snuggle into him which makes him feel secure. It’s a good balance.

Fall Drable: Leaves/Bonfire

“I wasn’t expecting it to be this cold already.” You shivered and scooted closer to Dabi, your arms wrapped around yourself in an attempt to keep in any warmth you could.

“I told you to check the weather before we went on this mission, you know. That’s your fault entirely. It’s not exactly Summer anymore.” He gave you a side glance before returning his attention to the fire in front of the both of you, orange flames dancing in the reflection of his eyes. 

For a moment it seemed he was just going to sit there and leave you to freeze- you hoped he wouldn’t, but he sure could have his moods sometimes. However, a few seconds after the fact he sighed and wrapped an arm around you to pull you closer, swaddling part of his leather jacket around your frame as he did so. It was hardly big enough for the both of you, but it was all you had; both of you were guilty of under-packing for the weather, and neither of you had thought to bring a blanket or anything warmer than your sleeping bags. The mission wasn’t supposed to last longer than a few days, and the rest of the week had been warm, so you didn’t really think anything of it at the time.

“Can’t this fire get any warmer?” You pressed further into his side, relishing in the small amount of warmth from his coat. “It’s so small, it hardly makes a difference...and I’d rather not get hypothermia and die.” Your breath came out as an icy puff of air as you spoke.

“If you find me something that will burn for a while, we could make a bonfire. But there weren’t many sticks or trees around here...” As he trailed off, he glanced into the small tree row at the edge of the clearing. “We could probably scavenge some wood from that way, but it’s pretty far off.”

“Remind me again why we can’t just use your quirk?”

“Because it’ll burn everything within seconds. Do you want me to light this whole campsite on fire?”

“No thanks, I’m not in the mood for arson right now. Try me again tomorrow though, you never know,” you quipped back, your eyes rolling as you shook your head. You had already known why you couldn’t use his quirk to start the fire, but it didn’t change the amount of annoyance you felt after hearing him say it out loud.

You took a quick look around as well trying to see if there was any garbage or debris that you could light on fire, but you found nothing. Nothing but the large piles of surprisingly still-colorful leaves on the ground, the wind rustling them every time a breeze blew by. Somehow they managed to seem vibrant even after leaving the trees bare by falling to the ground and nestling into the dirt for a while. You leaned down and picked one up, absentmindedly throwing it into the fire.

“Don’t do that, you’ll smoke us ou-” Dabi started to chastise you but quickly stopped as he watched the orange maple leaf smolder in the embers of the fire without drowning your campsite in smoke. “Hey, it’s actually burning.” Maybe... “I’m gonna go see if I can find some larger sticks by the row of trees. You stay here by the fire and gather up a couple piles of leaves. If we can burn up enough dry leaves with the sticks, then they’ll catch fire to the logs and keep it going.”

“I’ll do anything if it means this fire gets even slightly warmer.”

A half hour later you had four different piles of leaves and a couple of nice sized logs stacked to the side of the pit, thanks to your and Dabi’s efforts. Dabi set up a few sticks and two logs in the middle over the embers of the previous smaller fire, and then the two of you grabbed a handful of leaves each to throw on top. They caught fire almost immediately, and you kept piling them on as they burned up, the sticks eventually following suit. Next came the logs, and before you knew it, you had a sizable fire in front of you, warm flames licking at the wood and providing you both with heat.

“Finally...” you sighed, relaxing into your partner’s side once more.

“What a pain in the ass.” Beside you, Dabi returned to wrapping an arm around you, though he must not have felt like sharing his jacket anymore now that the fire was stronger.

“Me, or the fire?” you laughed, though you already knew how he would reply.

“Both.” He gave you that trademark smirk of his. 

[honeybee-babe]

How can you excuse all of the abusive things Luther has done to his siblings (especially Klaus) throughout the series? And don't pull the "he was drunk" card. And without implying that Luther locking up Vanya isn't intentionally cruel or intended to hurt her? He has the ability to think logically, unlike Vanya he isn't experiencing a literal psychotic break down.... Please, explain this to me logically. Thanks.

~ wowowowowowow i clenched my jaw all night thinking about this ask~~

Yikes. You’re not asking me why I “excuse his actions” (I don’t), you’re asking why I see him as a human being with flaws and trauma which need to be addressed rather than the literal devil. And why I don’t think he is irredeemable based on a few terrible choices (when he has also made some great ones and showed affection for his siblings in the past). I honestly think people hate Luther because it’s easier to have clearly good characters and clearly bad characters, even in a show that actively and artfully avoids that dichotomy.

Why do you care that I like Luther? I’m not bashing your faves or causing any harm to you? I am not trying to tell you to like him or convince you he is a great character. I know he has flaws. 

But if you really want to know how I “excuse all his actions” (which…. I don’t?), I’ll humor you, but I’m answering the question you’re really asking:

Why Do You Not Despise Luther?:

This response is really longwinded but THIS QUESTION IS REALLY OVER-SIMPLIFYING(!!!) so I feel it’s warranted.

First, I’m gonna address the “abusive things Luther has done to his siblings throughout the series:”

I am not excusing any of the things Luther “does to his siblings,” I’m just saying we should extend the same amount of courtesy to him in sympathizing with him and understanding the motive behind his actions (just like we all do with Vanya). And also consider the fact that he is deeply traumatized and has literally been gaslit his entire life into thinking he has to follow a specific model that was set out for him as “leader.” Literally he has been taught that he is nothing without the UA and being a leader, and I don’t think people release how damaging that is to a person?

But also hot take: I don’t think Luther is abusive towards his siblings at all? Not until the last two episodes for sure. I think he is insensitive towards others’ emotions at times, but he is never cruel just for the sake of being cruel. I honestly think Luther is incapable of picking up on emotional cues to some extent.

I’m re-watching right now, I just finished episode 7 and I have yet to see any signs of him being abusive towards the others, and not Klaus specifically? The choking scene was vile and physically violent but I don’t think it’s abusive because it was a one time thing and abuse is a cycle. Luther isn’t particularly awful to Klaus, he is just dismissive? The only person he ever is really verbally mean to is Diego when they get into fights and Diego is just as bad if not worse, and also intentionally tries to get an emotional rise out of Luther (which is…. just as awful and cruel?).

But yeah I finished episode 7 and no abuse so far… maybe my dumb ass who was abused for my whole life just doesn’t understand what abuse looks like? Okay that’s kind of a joke but I’m actually being serious, my abuse is pretty similar to Luther’s and my body dysmorphia/eating issues are similar to his too which is a lot of why I resonate with him, so I could be missing signs because I’ve probably acted the same way. So please point out to me where specifically he committed an act of abuse, and not a one time act of violence or simply being dismissive of/not picking up on someone’s emotional needs.

Also I honestly think Luther is just in denial of others’ emotional needs because he is in denial of his own emotional needs. He has been taught to push everything down, including the needs of others, with the only goal being completing the mission, and protecting everyone/leading everyone to safety. Also I mean, he hasn’t been around human beings for 4 years (so of course he struggles to relate to them/communicate healthily), and he was always taught not to engage with his siblings but just to lead them because that was his role.

Also Klaus and Diego (especially Diego) are just as dismissive of Luther’s trauma? And like yeah Luther covers it up but it’s pretty freaking obvious…pointing out how big he is specifically.

Diego literally sees Luther shirtless after the chandelier falls on him, sees how self-conscious he clearly is, and then never asks about it or checks on him (yet continues to joke about it – also Klaus makes fun of his muscles when he first sees him which is just insensitive). And in the first episode the way Klaus jokes around during the family meeting about cucumber sandwiches when Luther is trying to plan a memorial service; it’s obvious that Luther is grieving and paranoid (and also that he has been manipulated enough to love Reginald!!!) and Klaus is just making jokes and not addressing this? And then they both just ignore his obvious paranoia over Reginald’s death and just call him crazy and walk away? And don’t use the “he was high” excuse for Klaus being a prick (just like I can’t use the ‘he was drunk’ excuse for Luther, which I never did once btw, y’all just want more justification 2 hate on him).

Also: Yes, Luther tells Diego to stop talking shit about Reginald at the memorial service but like, from his perspective, that is someone bashing the person he was closest to AT HIS FUNERAL!!! He starts the fight with Diego but only after Diego provoked him, clearly intentionally, and Diego continues to fight him and throws a fucking knife at his arm (but physical violence is only not okay when Luther uses it right?).

Also HUGE THING Y'ALL ARE IGNORING: Klaus finds out Luther had nonconsensual sex while drugged out of his mind and congratulates him………. uhhhhhhhhhhhhhh idk about you but I think Klaus has been around the block when it comes to drugs and sex (and consent) and should realize that someone on drugs for the first time losing their virginity is nonconsensual, or even if considered consensual still pretty icky? Like Luther is clearly ashamed and upset and doesn’t want to talk about it and Klaus just laughs abt it. That is so not cool.

And another thing:

Luther is very, very protective of Five which is so so sweet, yet people just completely overlook it because they only want to see the bad things he’s done. When he and Allison run into him in the hallway at the end of Run Boy Run and see him looking distressed Luther asks him in a soft voice, “Are you okay? Can we help?” and reaches out to touch Five’s face. Five grabs his hand to stop him but this was very sweet? Like it’s clear Luther has a soft spot for him because he’s small.

But Diego? After he finds out about Patch he bursts into his apartment and goes to attack Five; Luther has to pick him up to restrain him from beating up their brother who has the body of a 13 year old. All because he blames him for the death of the love of his life (just like Luther is afraid of Vanya after she killed Allison). But in Diego’s case, Patch is already dead; Diego only wants to hurt Five out of vengeance, not because he’s trying to protect Patch. And he doesn’t apologize or anything after????? It’s just never brought up again!

SO IN TERMS OF LUTHER BEING AWFUL TO KLAUS THE WHOLE SEASON: is he? is he really? is he really abusive? and is he really that much worse than his other siblings?

And now I’ll address this nonsense:

“And without implying that Luther locking up Vanya isn’t intentionally cruel or intended to hurt her? He has the ability to think logically, unlike Vanya he isn’t experiencing a literal psychotic break down…. Please, explain this to me logically. Thanks.“

…….sigh.

Luther is absolutely not being intentionally cruel or doing this to “punish” Vanya, he’s doing this because he’s freaking the fuck out and doesn’t have any idea what she might do. Yes it’s a bad idea but we need to keep in mind that he’s not thinking logically, he is emotionally distressed. Yes he could talk to her but Allison had just tried to do that…. and look where the fuck that got her?

Do you seriously believe Luther was mentally stable and thinking logically in this moment? Do you not realize he was literally going through a breakdown and identity crisis of his own?

He just found out maybe two days ago that his entire life was a lie and the person whose approval he sought the most didn’t give a shit about him, found out he was isolated from humanity for no reason (which….. as if being isolated in itself wasn’t traumatic enough), after he was mutilated against his will, and now he has just witnessed the person he loves most almost die and he couldn’t do anything about it. Luther is experiencing a breakdown and I think a big part of it is control: he realizes he’s had no agency his whole life/has never had control, he just lost control/agency over his body on drugs even more and had nonconsensual sex while intoxicated, and then after this he sees Allison dying and he can’t do anything to help her (he can’t even give his blood)!!!! His superstrength and locking up Vanya is the only thing he has control over, he feels it’s all he can do to prevent the apocalypse/protect everyone. 

Not only that but the idea of control as contol over powers: Luther has super strength, he has to be super careful and controlled all the time so he doesn’t accidentally hurt the people he loves… the thought of someone’s powers being out of control is probably the scariest thing in the world to him. And yes, he gets in fights with Diego but he doesnt use his full strength (just like Diego doesn’t either) because if they did then they would actually hurt each other, they have a lot of control over their powers. But Diego can control his powers by just… not throwing things and having temper tantrums. Luther doesn’t need to be angry to fuck up with his powers, we see that in the very first episode when he punches the model airplane. Luther can never escape his powers and has to constantly control them, and the idea of uncontrolled powers is his worst fucking nightmare.

So Vanya tells him, “we got in an argument and things got out of control” … like just imagine what must be racing through Luther’s mind when he hears that!

Yes what he does in this scene is awful but you can’t convince me he is doing it with the intention of hurting her. Literally you can see in his eyes as he is choking her how pained he is by this. And he apologizes to her: why would he apologize to her if he was trying to hurt her? And if that was intention… why wouldn’t he just fucking kill her?

I absolutely don’t agree with his decision here but like…. he absolutely is going through a mental breakdown and it doesn’t just stop during The Day that Was/Wasn’t and to act like he is completely stable and in his right mind when he locks Vanya up is just grossly oversimplifying everything! 

Y’all demonizes him over this but completely overlook some of the awful things his siblings have done (Diego going to beat up Five because he blames him for Patch’s death, Vanya killing a ton of random people because she was locked up)…. Like yes: Luther is insensitive, dismissive, and cruel in this scene but it is not his intention to be cruel, it’s obviously his intention to control Vanya’s out-of-control powers, protect his siblings (esp. Allison), and prevent her from causing the apocalypse. It is awful and yes it is cruel but to act like he just doesn’t give a shit about Vanya and/or is doing it just to hurt her is just….. so beyond what the show is portraying.

And I get that you guys really despise him for this, and if you’re going to hate him, fine: but you completely overlook the terrible things all the other siblings do throughout the whole series and write Luther off as evil, which is not cool. Seriously, y’all portray Luther as the literal devil just so that your faves seem like infallible angels and your headcanons and fanfictions seem nicer and more simple………. and honestly I just can’t reason with you. I think some people just hate on Luther and love everyone else because his abuse situation is more complex and they’re just… literally too lazy to do the mental math, so they stick with stanning everyone else whose trauma is more obvious? Even though Luther covering up his trauma (literally) and refusing to talk about/deal with it is a huge plot point in the show, y’all perceive this as him just not having any trauma, or just overook how his trauma affects his actions.

This show isn’t supposed to be “everyone in the family are wonderful, perfect victims and deals with their trauma like angels EXCEPT LUTHER HE IS STOOPID AND EVIL AND ALSO HIS TRAUMA ISN’T DEEP ENOUGH!!!!!!!!!”…… and if you think this then I think you need to do some soul searching? Or actually do some research into abuse and learn that it comes in many different forms and has many different effects?

Again: I don’t dislike any of the siblings. I used them as examples but I love Diego, Klaus and Vanya!!! I respect and understand them all and view them all as troubled souls who are trying.

This show is complex and it’s designed to be uncomfy, and if you simply write it off as having clear victims and villains (except Reginald, he a dick) then you are not respecting the writing or giving the show justice. 

Gerard Way says he wrote Luther based on his own experience of body dysmorphia, isolation���.. the show designers say he has self-harmed before, and Tom Hopper has said Luther has been suicidal in the past…. but you know what, go on portraying his trauma as “having it easy” and using violence/cruelty just for fun, even though the show clearly portrays him as a broken man.

~

[jenosweave]

going to hogwarts w/ jaemin !

requested by anon!

talented. brilliant. incredible. amazing. show stopping. spectacular. never the same. totally unique.

basics

house: gryffindor

year: 3

patronus: dolphin

favorite class: defense against the dark arts

extra info: promotes the welfare of muggle-borns and half bloods by writing speeches and speaking before different executives among the department of magic. is also in knitting club so he can make his friends cute matching sweaters

personality

the nicest boy you could ever meet

is really just so caring

never lets anyone sit alone during lunch and always invites over kids to sit with him and his friends

stands up against discrimination

a bi icon but you didn’t hear that from me

countless rumors of him dating jeno that he “can neither confirm nor deny”

jeno denies it

has friends in every house

everyone likes him, it’s hard not to there is one exception but we’ll get to that

writes really sweet encouraging notes for his friends to find when they’re stressed over a test

everyone wonders why he’s not a huff bc he’s so sweet and cares so much

but then he threatens to beat someones ass after insulting a muggle born and everyone’s reminded he’s super bold and brave

has challenged some dumbass bitches to a couple duels

is undefeated

the dueling club leader BEGS him to join but with knitting club and all his studies? i think the fuck not!

kinda clingy with his friends

has cuddled with all his roommates before

soft baby

warms the hearts of all his teachers

a really good student tbh

relationship

les get it

basically, one day

jaemin really wasn’t feeling all too confident on a test everyone was gonna have in defense against the dark arts the following week

so he went to the class to beg his teacher to re-explain a concept to him that he couldn’t understand even after a fucking 20 min discussion abt it

his plan was to go during lunch and harass his teacher then

so, he set off during lunch and surprisingly found the door to be unlocked as normally he has to BEAT on the door to get his teacher to open it

and that’s where he found YOU

wand in hand

shaking wildly

with a fucking butterfly in front of you

and you struggling to cast the spell riddikulus

he BURST out laughing and caused his presence to be known

the teacher noticed him and placed the boggart back in the wardrobe and you were BRIGHT ASS RED

this super cute gryffindor just saw that you’re scared of BUTTERFLIES it was so embarrassing

and from that point on jaemin basically harassed you everytime he saw you

he called you “butterfly” and deadass won’t leave you alone and his friends and your friends always question you two about it and you choose NOT to say what happened

“y/n omg when did you meet that cute gryffindor? whats his name?”

“jaemin??? butterfly???? wtf?????”

and eventually it kinda dies down but he still makes little faces at you when yall see each other in the hallways or in between classes

you kinda wanna like talk to him... but he just really intimidates you.... like hes so pretty and funny and sweet and that just scares the shit out of you

so... you decide to take a different route and kinda... ask the defense against the dark arts teacher for a tutor bc you’re f*iling and need a pick me up

maybe you request jaemin omo but you BEG him not to tell jaemin that bc you’re like INTO him into him and you don’t wanna be weird or seem weird lol hahah

so the professor called yall into his office to discus it w/ yall (jaemin got fucking SCARED bc he thought yall were abt to get expelled for the teasing and almost shat himself 👇🤪👇)

and when he explained the situation jaemin was secretly like really happy

and you knew the teasing would worsen but you didnt really regret your request bc jaemins cute and funny!!!1!

the next day yall met in the library and it was highkey awkward

like yall just avoided eye contact and kinda sat there but you decided to break the silence

“um,,,,” your sudden words made him shoot up to look at you “how are you uh,,,.. liking dada so far?”

and unbeknownst to you... a beast was unleashed

but you found it oddly endearing how his eyes frantically searched the room as to figure out how to make his thought coherent and how his smile shown through his words and ESPECIALLY how his hands flailed around as he spoke

it made you deadass uwu and giggle and you guys just talked for hours and hours

like yall didnt get shit done mood

and like jaemin was like HIGHKEY so cute and it made your heart beat at a million beats and it didnt help that yall kinda became inseparable after that took place

like you two were so compatible and alike that like being with other people was so..... weird

not to mention that all the time you spent with the boy helped you catch feelings like drake omo XD

he made your heart race and you couldnt just like all of sudden tell him so you push it to the back of your mind for now

until his friends lowkey start hinting that he likes you like at least jeno tries to be subtle... hyuck just blurts it out

“hey y/n! lovely morning we’re having! oh and btw, jaemin likes u! see you in potions!”

so now that his friends have been hinting at it, you start getting like..,,,, really flustered around him

like you constantly blush and are at a loss for words when he hugs you now

like UGH feelings suck

soon, christmas rolls around and you weren’t able to spend it with your relatives :( so you had to stay at hogwarts and kinda just hang around

but then!!! before all your friends left (a lot of jaemins friends were now your friends too lmao) hyuck deadass whispered in your ear

“jaemin is staying here during christmas too for certain reasons uwu have fun!!”

and then he ran away skxjsjc

the days leading up until christmas,

you spent a lot of your time studying but rarely any of it with jaemin :(

it kinda sucked bc you were having withdrawals from not seeing your bestest friend

however! you finally ran into him where he was for the past couple days you had no clue and he asked if you two could spend christmas together :(

obviously you agreed and thus you counted down the next couple days until christmas finally arrived

you two planned on eating breakfast together and then was when you would exchange gifts !!!!

nervous doesnt even begin to describe how you were feeling bitch ooOjdjd

you saw him already sitting at the gryffindor table with a big ass bag and when he waved at you??? with that big ass smile on his face????? oh my GOD!!!!!!!! butterflies!!!!!!!!!!!

you felt kinda self conscious since your gift bag was literally a fifth the size of his, but you carried on and sat at the empty space across from him

you guys ate and caught up on what had been going on (why he had been afk for fucking days)

and when that topic was finally brought up he let out a sigh and reached for the gift bag and took a woolly sweater out and handed you what remained

“now! open it!!”

and in there was a pastel yellow sweater with the word ‘yes’ knitted in black

uhhhh???? you were so confused???? what does yes mean????? and right when you looked up to ask, jaemin pulled on the other sweater he took out of the bad and put it on himself

it was the same overall pastel yellow with black text... but the words were different and your jaw DROPPED

‘will you go out with me?’

BITCH YOU WERE SO SHOOK YOU ALMOST STARTED CRYING LIKE OH MY GOOOOOOOD

and that was when the power couple of hogwarts started

everyones been knew you two liked eat other hyuck said “its abt damn time”

anyway!!!!! yall are so cute like he walks you to class and even the teachers think you guys are just the cutest thing ever and when you told your friends???? they were SCREAMING like you got such an amazing guy UGH your mind

all i’m saying is... dating jaemin is like dating your really clingy and attractive best friend and you aint mad abt it

uwu that’s all for now!!! if you’d like to request another member.. our ask box is open!

[nukasarsparilla]

Family

It's 4:00 am, can't sleep, drabbled abt Six and Yes Man being gay instead.

"Do you ever wonder about family?"

Yes Man hears the question as a gunshot fires from the top of the Lucky 38, just missing a bottle of Sunset Sarsparilla(tm) on the ground below. Six is killing time before a visit from some NCR negotiators- a worthless cause, in his opinion, not that he would voice it- and he's in his old frame beside them, watching the poor marksmanship.

"I'm not sure I understand what you mean!" Yes Man says, and is genuine about it. He's a securitron, an Artificial Lifeform; he's incapable of having a family, in the literal sense. He's not sure he understands the sentimental sense enough to make a judgement there, either.

Six seems to get that, though, with a look bordering wistful, but mostly displaying a hopeless smile.

"You ever wondered what it's like to have one? Do robots think about human... quirks?" They look up at him from under the brim of their hat- it doesn't match their suit at all, and they've never cared- and Yes Man could swear their eyes betrayed an emotion beyond curiosity. He would if he were any good at placing human feelings, anyway- after all, he was just some robot! Not like he could understand the intricacies of human emotional displays!

He considers the clarified question for a moment, tapping a giant metal finger below his screen in a gesture of thought. "I don't believe I ever have! Since I'm not human, after all, there's no point in wondering about family! I didn't even have friends before you rolled into town, so even thinking about friendship was something I couldn't entertain!"

"Huh. I don't really think about family either."

The response took him him surprise, for a moment. But it made sense, didn't it? Six barely remembered a thing from before they got shot.

"I guess I should be wondering where my family is, or if I had any friends before. But I haven't! This was all... much easier." They looked at Yes Man again. "Guess we're in similar boats. No need to entertain the thought." They aimed again and fired, missing once more. "Fuck! Still can't do shit without V.A.T.S.!"

Yes Man wasn't stupid. He was self-loathing, and cynical despite outward appearance, and lord knows he had a hard time with the finer points of Human Feelings, but he wasn't stupid. In fact, he was rather proud of his strokes of genius. He could tell Six was bothered, in some way. He knew Six by now.

"Is something wrong with that?"

"I mean, being able to shoot on my own seems pretty important, Yessie."

"Well, yes, but I meant what you said before that. About not entertaining the thought? Do you think you should be?"

Six put the gun at their side and looked up at the monitor that was his face. They looked up with a crooked grin and pride in their eyes.

"You're really comin' outta your shell, Yes Man. Speaking out, lately. I'm so used to you just rollin' along with shit, it's always so great when you actually remember you're free of that old programming-"

Yes Man did something even bolder then: he interrupted them.

"That's awful kind of you, Six! You could make a robot blush! But... Are you avoiding the question?"

"No, I just... didn't have an answer?" They shrugged. "...holy shit you cut me off-" They burst into joyous laughter, bouncing on their feet. "You cut me off! God DAMN, you're doing amazing!"

Yes Man was all at once flattered and flustered and confused. He supposed he understood WHY it was a 'big deal', but it felt like an overreaction. Then again, Six had always seemed to care more deeply for Yes Man than he had for himself.

"Thank you?" He settled for a simple response. Maybe Six found it so great because he never acted out at THEM, specifically. He wondered if Six worried that he held himself back around them, but truthfully his deeper urges to be unpleasant weren't common towards them. They WERE his favorite person. They were practically his favorite ANYTHING- in human terms, he was certain they were best friends.

"...you know, some humans consider their closest friends to be their family, instead of the people they share blood with. I guess... I guess I don't worry so much about the family I can't remember, because you're the family I have now." Yes Man could only stare and process the statement as Six, addicted as ever, popped open another Sunser Sarsparilla. "You and all the others here, helping me run the place. But especially you." They beamed up at Yes Man, then patted his arm affectionately.

Yes Man smiled back. "I guess we ARE that close, huh? It feels weird to have a family, but that's likely because it's a human concept. It's certainly not a bad feeling!"

"Good. I'm glad." Their smile softened, fond and warmer than the Mojave, then they took a gargantuan swig of soda and laughed. "Let's hurry on down! Can't keep those NCR guys waiting!"

They COULD. They HAD, before. They had once blown off a meeting with members of the NCR because they felt like hanging out with Boone and Arcade, shooting the shit whilst ALSO shooting the Legion. Arcade had said it was a fun afternoon. The NCR Rangers didn't look amused.

But it seemed like Six wanted to be a little better this time around, so they skipped ahead and went back into the 38. Yes Man hesitated, for once.

He considered that he could now consider human 'quirks', as Six had put it. He wondered what he REALLY considered Six.

He wondered if he was right about it being something as complex and human as love.

[weeniewrites]

OKAY ONE LAST POST BECAUSE IM ABSOLUTELY TERRIBLE AT NOT TALKING

its a more serious one though, so if you dont wanna see me be more personal go ahead and skip i dont mind. im gonna ramble abt the shame i feel with having sadistic thoughts and fears of sexual agency, and kinda, sex in general, maybe some self destructive behaviors? kinda honestly putting my soul out there. its a bit of a vent post. im not having a bad night or anything, just thinking a lot, and want to get those thoughts out of my head

i, really outta do some research on actual sadism or just, see other people who have similar thoughts cause ill admit i feel a lot of guilt about it. like id never, ever, EVER want to hurt another person, and the idea of even spanking someone consensually is very scary to me

but this isnt a new thing for me, some of the first things i found arousing as a kid involved pain. i was fascinated by inuyashas blood covered hands, and rewatched part of a youtube letsplay over and over and over again just to hear the noise link made when he got injured again. same with part of that animated 2ne1 music video where the villain grimaces when his car gets hit. these are really vivid memories for me so like, i know this isnt some suddenly new thing for me. (im also repulsed by gore but can also find it beautiful in art, and writing violent stuff is therapeutic for me but can be REALLY triggering if im reading it)

and i dont know if that sorta, anti kink purity culture thing the internets been moving towards has contributed? to that shame i feel, or if thats just my empathy acting up. because i really do care strongly for people, basically every person i ever meet. and i, sort? of understand the appeal of masochism myself, and i definitely understand the appeal of domming. but i dont understand how to control a scene, how to start up a scene, how to monitor the subs mental state, how to even take that control in the first place because even imagining doing that scares me so, so fucking badly

so i write noncon dom stuff, so i dont have to figure out how to get them there, or how to keep them safe, and i get to satisfy that deep hidden desire to scratch and claw and smile and laugh at someone shaking and crying in fear. or if its soft, just taking care of them and loving them and being loved and needed i can imagine companionship in the only way i understand how, through sex. ive had very few long lasting close friendships, ive never had a crush, and honestly im not, sure? i enjoy sex? like i like being touched but once i have to do it back i get really scared (unless we take things really slow, but im also very inexperienced). i just like being desired, or honestly getting touch of any kind and thats the only way i know how to ask for it

and i kinda, only realized that fear recently. i dont think i had it when i was 18 and I was just starting to interact with people online. but back then i wouldve never dreamed of flirting with anyone either. (had that fuckin trauma BOY HOWDY)

um, to bring this around to what brought these thoughts out, a while ago i was flirting with a friend, we just did that for fun absolutely no sexual or romantic intentions involved. and they told me about how sore they were and i responded back with a grin and giggle and a growl and a laugh and said all the different ways id love to bend and prod them to make it worse because, well, I’m a sadist. and they liked it. i got dizzy with how much i enjoyed that teasing. i literally started slurring my words and had to stop because i couldnt talk anymore, just drool and lay in a warm fuzzy heap of satisfied feelings.

and then afterwards we talked for a bit and as i calmed down and came back to myself i just, i felt like i was going to burst out of my skin, shakey and unsteady, head buzzing, nearly obsessive with the need to tell them i’d never hurt them and make sure i hadnt. so i told them. tried to keep control of myself but i cried. i was near fucking inconsolable. i was terrified i made them uncomfortable, went too far though everything was consensual and it was just flirting, not even explicit! teasing at the maximum! we’d said far spicier things before! they knew i’d never hurt them never want to hurt them never dream of hurting them. and i still cried. i felt wrong. i felt mean i felt horrible, and i’d enjoyed it

and im still a sadist, i find specific kinds of pain arousing, i dont like scarring or blood, preferring discomfort over all, and occasionally i write much much darker content that i dont find sexually appealing, but helps me get out my anger and other emotions i dont know how to process otherwise, and sometimes its just, fun? i know i dont want to hurt people, and i know these things are helpful for me, but i still feel shame

honestly a lot of the kinks or fetishes i used to like, im not sure if i do anymore, either because i just, dont, or ive realized theyre not as acceptable as i once thought, or theyre just not as common online anymore. and i dont feel comfortable sharing them, whether out of fear of rejection, or of making someone else uncomfortable. considering some of the stuff i enjoy imagining or writing i cant read myself. thats, kindof a weird contrast isnt it? (but that might also be because when i was younger, much younger, id read very dark fics, or angst, or look at gore, animal death, death and the nearly dying, as a form of self harm, purposefully seeking out what i knew would trigger me just to keep me dissociating for as long as possible so i wouldnt have to feel, and i’ll admit this is still a mild problem for me, but ive gotten leagues, leagues LEAGUES better. and i try very hard to heed warnings, because i know no one would want me to do that with their works)

cant i just have fun, do i have to have all these shames and memories to go along with this kind of stuff. whyd i find it when i was younger. why do i so closely associate porn and sex with pain when ive never really stopped consuming it. why cant i admit i just want to be held and told im important and enough instead of imagining getting dicked down by men who i both wouldnt be attracted to irl and be scared of

[ohsweetflips]

hawk in the raven nest, chapter twenty-nine

A/N: please read end notes as it regards notes abt the final chapter of this fic

read on ao3

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Corruption was crawling over the walls of Castle Evermore. It loomed over Nathaniel, staring down at him, as he exited the car. Lord Ichirou’s driver said no word to him before driving off. Nathaniel watched the car leave before turning his stare back to the building. The early-afternoon sun glinted off the windows and Nathaniel felt that he could look through it into the inner, dark, twisted set up of Castle Evermore.

Nathaniel looked forward to the only door that led to both freedom and hell, depending on whether you were leaving or entering. He allowed himself to step through the door that Kevin escaped through, knowing that this was one more step closer to the end.

Tetsuji was not in his office. Nathaniel nodded at the empty room. He was in the right to not be in Nathaniel’s line of sight. Tetsuji was just as guilty as Riko was. Riko didn’t have on-hand connections with Kengo and Lord Ichirou’s contacts, who else would he had gotten them from?

Nathaniel wondered if Tetsuji was proud of what he did, of the manipulation and abuse he put on the children and adults that have been put in his care. He had taken lives that had potential and crafted them into what he wanted them to be, even if it required breaking them so that they could heal catered to him.

The court was empty. Nathaniel didn’t have his phone on him, he left it in the locker room because he didn’t think he would need a phone when he was dead, but he didn’t have to look at the time to know that the Ravens were meant to be practicing.

He didn’t know where Tetsuji was, but he knew where Riko would be. Riko would be downstairs, feigning confusion over where their backliner had gone, expecting to hear news that he was six feet under. He would pretend to mourn over Nathaniel, as if he meant more than dirt to Riko, while rejoicing over the fact that he thought he won. Maybe Tetsuji was hiding, maybe he knew that Nathaniel survived, but Riko believed that he had come out on top.

Riko was going to wish that he went into hiding.

Nathaniel crossed across the empty court and through the empty locker room and descended the stairs. The thin, dark stairwell was suffocating. Nathaniel could feel the chill rising up from the depths of it but he willed himself forward. No matter how much his chest seized or how his eyes had yet to take adjustment to the dim lightning, Nathaniel was not afraid.

When Nathaniel reached the Ravens’ lounge, Riko Moriyama was already staring at him. He must have heard the door open and hoped that it was anyone else but the boy he thought he killed. Nathaniel stared back. Riko’s neck had finger-shaped bruises around it and his eyes were full of what could only be described as sheer panic. It was just him and Nathaniel in the lounge, all the others had flocked somewhere else. Now would be the only time that Riko revealed any true weakness that did not stem from mania. No, this look in his eyes, this fear, gave Nathaniel the idea that Riko finally realized that he was not going to win. Riko knew that things were going to change when he broke Kevin’s hand, knew things were breaking when the Directors searched their dorms, but right here, right now, Riko now knew that what he had done was irreversible and that his demise was inevitable.

Nathaniel wondered what it would feel like to snap Riko’s neck with his own hands, to give him even an ounce of the pain that he caused everyone else. But Nathaniel decided that that would be too nice. Riko deserved nothing short of complete and utter suffering. Nathaniel would make sure that Riko watched his own destruction and that it killed him.

Nathaniel blinked and saw his father behind his eyes, but this was not a Wesninski attitude. A Wesninski killed because, to a Wesninski, there was no other option. You either worked with him, or you were dead. A Wesninski had no sense of justice, no sense of fighting for the people who couldn’t fight for themselves. Nathaniel felt something in his heart pull, and he hoped it was pulling away from Nathan Wesninski.

“You’ll have to try harder than that next time,” Nathaniel said. “If you even get that far.”

Riko stared. Nathaniel placed two fingers to his temple and then flicked them out in a bid goodbye to his captain.

He turned and headed down the hallway to the single-digit dormitories.

He didn’t process stopping, but he found his hand on the doorknob of a door that was not his. It might as well have been because the door led to a room that felt something like what home was supposed to feel like. He wasn’t thinking, he just pushed the door open because it was something that had become natural and had become his and it hadn’t occurred to him until he stepped in and saw blonde hair and hazel eyes and a tattooed five that he was never supposed to be here again.

“Nathaniel,” Andrew Minyard’s voice blew through him and Nathaniel watched as Andrew took fast steps to close the gap between them. Andrew’s steps were heartbeats in Nathaniel’s ear and that life broke something inside Nathaniel that had been waiting to burst.

He didn’t realize what was happening until his face was already wet but, for the first time in a very long while, Nathaniel Wesninski cried.

“You idiot,” Andrew said in a voice that Nathaniel could hear no menace in. “You absolute fucking idiot.” Andrew kicked the door shut behind them, keeping him and Nathaniel in their own bubble of privacy.

Nathaniel’s knees buckled and the only thing that stopped him from collapsing was Andrew cushioning him to the floor. He pressed his hands to his eyes, trying to stop the tears that continued to fall as sobs racked through his body.

“Nathaniel, breathe,” Andrew ordered, his voice sounding far away in Nathaniel’s ears.

“I can’t,” Nathaniel rasped out.

He was never supposed to see this again.

“You’re here, Nathaniel.”

If timing had been one second off, Nathaniel would have been dead.

“I was never supposed to see you again.” Nathaniel’s hands reached forward, desperate for something to hold onto, needing something to keep him from falling any further, but stopped an inch from Andrew’s shirt. To breathe hurt, his body trembled, and he needed Andrew, but only if Andrew would accept him back.

One of Andrew’s hands grabbed Nathaniel’s and pressed it to his chest, while the other clasped the back of his neck. He brought Nathaniel in closer and Nathaniel rested his head in the crook of Andrew’s neck. He breathed him in, finding that Andrew was the one thing to clear his lungs of cobwebs and stop his heart from killing him with each beat. To feel Andrew’s own beneath his hand reminded himself that he was here and that this was real.

“I was never supposed to see you again,” Nathaniel repeated, his voice weak and muffled in Andrew’s neck.

“I don’t think I’d be able to get rid of you that easily,” Andrew said with no malice in his voice.

Nathaniel managed a smile and a wet laugh. “You aren’t that lucky,” he mumbled.

“Nathaniel,” Andrew said, the syllables coming off his tongue smoothly. “I distinctly remember telling you to not come crying to me when shit went wrong.”

Nathaniel nodded, Andrew’s shirt crinkling in his grip. “I’ve never been the best listener.”

“So I’ve learned.”

Andrew then let him sit in silence, breathing him in until he was able to calm down. Finally, he pulled away, using one hand to still hold onto Andrew and the other to rub at his eyes. He then turned his gaze up to Andrew.

“Nathan Wesninski is dead,” he said.

“And you managed to escape him,” Andrew noted.

“Lord Ichirou killed him,” Nathaniel explained. “He followed orders that weren’t his Lord’s. It was a fatal offense.”

Andrew nodded. “It appears that Riko is doing our job for us. He’s a bigger idiot than you are. You just almost get yourself killed and be the martyr that no one asked for. He, however, makes faulty plans that will eventually kill him.”

Andrew’s tone was even, but Nathaniel could hear the hardness of his words. He wasn’t going to ask about it, he wasn’t going to press, but he had a feeling that Andrew had not taken Nathaniel’s disappearance lightly. He then thought of the bruises around Riko’s neck and found his answer.

“He would have hurt you,” Nathaniel said quietly, hoping that Andrew would understand.

“I don’t care about that,” Andrew said, and the that implied that there was something else Andrew cared about more, or perhaps someone else.

“I do,” Nathaniel said. “If I hadn’t broken off our deal, it would have eventually killed you. We Ravens are supposed to go down together, but I wouldn’t be able to live with myself if I knew that I killed you, too.”

“You’re an idiot, Nathaniel,” Andrew said, leaning in closer. “Yes or no?”

“Yes,” Nathaniel breathed, tension leaving his body as their lips pressed together.

Love wasn’t a word that was commonly used in Nathaniel’s vocabulary. It was a concept he never learned. Ravens didn’t love, they fucked. And if they even wanted anything more, they didn’t have the time. The Perfect Court wasn’t allowed it. They weren’t permitted any luxuries that would distract them from the success that their future held. Love was something that was unknown to Nathaniel, and he used to find himself fearing it. The love that his mother had for him turned fatal, and even that love would have just introduced him to a life of always running away. To love meant to give someone enough of you and trust that they wouldn’t break you. The thought of giving Nathaniel enough of himself to someone was always terrifying to him. He had always focused on surviving, he couldn’t risk letting feelings and another person get in the way of that. But as Nathaniel studied Andrew, he realized that he trusted Andrew with pieces of him and trusted Andrew to not break them. He trusted Andrew enough to perhaps compromise his future and risk his own life if it meant being able to achieve freedom with him.

Nathaniel realized that, perhaps, the word love had never really been so foreign to him.

Andrew stayed with Nathaniel that day. It wasn’t a decision that the two spoke about, but it was one that was already accepted. When Nathaniel was composed enough to leave, he stood, and Andrew did, too, and that was that.

Night came, and Nathaniel was sitting on his bed, his legs tucked up to his chest. Andrew was sitting across from him, his own legs crossed. The clock on the bedside table said that it was just past midnight. The entire day, the nest made no sound, and no practices were held.

Nathaniel stared down at the bandages around his hands and wrists. He could feel the gashes and burns under them.

“They’re going to scar,” he said quietly. He turned his wrists over and back, trying to see if he could see the way they’re healing under the bandages.

“They will,” Andrew agreed. There had been no sadness in Nathaniel’s voice, and no pity in Andrew’s. Nathaniel appreciated that.

“I want them to heal,” Nathaniel continued on, keeping his eyes locked his hands. “The Trojans play the Foxes in two days. And then spring championships is in two weeks. I want the Foxes to win against the Trojans, and then I want to play against them.”

“Even after playing the martyr,” Andrew said. “You’re still a junkie.”

Nathaniel nodded. “Even after playing the martyr,” he repeated. He then looked up at Andrew. “I need to call Jean.”

Andrew raised an eyebrow in silent question.

“I just… need to,” he said. He needed to tell him about what Lord Ichirou said, but more so, Nathaniel just wanted to know if he could hear his old roommate’s voice.

Renee Walker’s number was still where Nathaniel shoved it in his bed side drawer. He was impressed with Riko for not going through his shit when he thought that Nathaniel was dead. Probably the first time in Riko’s worthless life that anyone was ever impressed with him.

Andrew watched him as Nathaniel attempted to dial the neatly written number. Nathaniel assumed that Andrew finally grew tired of watching Nathaniel’s bandaged fingers fumble and mess up the numbers over and over because, eventually, he took the phone from Nathaniel and dialed the number himself.

“You still have her number,” Andrew said.

“Jealous?” Nathaniel asked while the phone was ringing, his eyebrow raised and a smirk on his lips.

“Didn’t think you were the type to blindly trust strangers.”

“Well you also didn’t think I was anything. And yet.”

“You’re nothing,” Andrew said, but Nathaniel swatted his hand to quiet him because Renee answered on the other line.

“Hello?” she said, her voice soft. He could hear other girls talking behind her.

“Renee,” Nathaniel said. “It’s Nathaniel.” A short pause. “Wesninski.”

“Oh,” Nathaniel could hear the surprise in her voice. “Nathaniel, hello. Is everything alright? Are you okay?” She must have been assuming that, since Nathaniel was calling again, Evermore must have been burning to the ground. The girls in the background stopped talking.

“I’m fine,” Nathaniel said and leveled Andrew’s heavy stare with his own. “That’s not what’s important. I wanted…” He worried his bottom lip. “Is Jean around?”

Renee paused on the other end. “Actually, he isn’t,” she finally said and something that felt like either disappointment or fear went through his gut. She must have sensed Nathaniel’s sudden shift in attitude because she quickly followed up with, “He’s safe. I can’t tell you where he is. Not yet. You’ll find out. But he’s safe.”

“Well, this is kind of important,” Nathaniel urged, hoping that she’d give him something, anything. “Is there any way I could contact him?”

“I’m sorry, Nathaniel,” Renee said. “But I think it would be best for you to learn from Jean on your own, when it happens. He’s not…” She hesitated and Nathaniel knew what she was attempting to find a way to word nicely.

“He doesn’t want to talk to me,” Nathaniel answered for her. “Or any Raven in general.” The feeling of fear in his gut lessened while the disappointment amplified.

“I’m sorry,” Renee repeated with genuine sorrow in her voice. Nathaniel still wondered how a girl who seemed to be so nice and so normal was a Palmetto State Fox.

“It’s okay,” Nathaniel assured. “I can understand. Well, if you hear from him, wish him the best.”

“Always,” Renee said, and Nathaniel found himself glad that Jean had recuperated with people, or at least one person, who was able to support him.

--

The Foxes had their game against the Trojans. The Ravens were gathered in their common room, staring at the TV. Most were prepared for a laughing stock. The nine team Foxes against the twenty-eight player Trojans with people like Jeremy Knox, Sara Alvarez, and Laila Dermott on their line (no one was going to mention that the Foxes had Kevin Day)? Most Ravens were excited to see the Foxes finally fall. Even Nathaniel admitted to himself that he was terrified; this was the last stepping stone that separated Fox from Raven and it was, by far, the largest one.

No Raven had mentioned Nathaniel’s return, or his sudden disappearance. They all acted like he never disappeared and that Evermore did not halt to a stop with his absence. He wondered if Andrew tried to strangle Riko in front of everybody and they were just refusing to mention it. Nathaniel wished that the Ravens would start to speak up more seeing that their Captain was dragging them down, but it appeared that old habits died hard because Nathaniel assumed that Riko told them to stay quiet. And stay quiet they did.

Nathaniel and Andrew were sitting on the loveseat together, their eyes glued to the TV. Riko was directly across the room for them in his usual recliner. Nathaniel had to admit to himself that he feared how confident Riko looked; Riko expected the Foxes to fail miserably.

The Trojan stadium was decked in red and gold. Even through the TV, Nathaniel could hear the intensity of the screams. The Trojans were just finishing their warm ups, the Foxes soon theirs.

In the short minutes that the Trojans had before the game, captain Jeremy Knox was pulled aside by a reporter.

Nathaniel assumed that Kevin must have felt blessed in the presence of his favorite athlete.

“Jeremy Knox, hello,” the reporter said, smiling.

“Hi!” Jeremy beamed a smile that put the sun to shame. Every athlete in Class I Exy knew that there was a reason that the Trojans one the best sportsmanship award, and it started with their captain.

“Are you ready for tonight?”

“As ready as we can be,” Jeremy said. “The Foxes have proven this year to be determined athletes. I know for a fact that tonight’s game won’t be easy. While we have earned our place here, so have the Foxes. We’re just going to have to play our best and give it our all out there.”

The reporter nodded eagerly. “Now, correct me if I’m wrong, but I’ve heard rumors about Jean Moreau, a former rival of yours, returning to the court next season. How do you feel about that, knowing that you could be facing his team soon?”

Jeremy nodded. “Oh, yes, I’ve heard that, too,” he said. “But I’m not worried because, Jean is returning to the court, yes, but he won’t be back in black.”

Suddenly, everything Renee said clicked into place.

“We were worried that red and gold wouldn’t fit Jean’s complexion, but we know we can make it work,” Jeremy continued on, smiling. “We just have to get him in the sun for a little bit and he’ll be good as gold.”

Nathaniel didn’t pay attention to what the reporter said. He, instead, was focused on Riko and the dead stare he had towards the TV.

Two of Riko’s Perfect Court had left him for rival teams.

A laugh actually bubbled in Nathaniel’s chest -one of satisfaction for seeing Riko come closer and closer to crumbling, one of joy for knowing that Jean was truly safe- but he covered it with a cough into his fist.

“Another waste of potential,” Riko said. It sounded like he said it so that his nerves would calm, and not because he believed it.

Nathaniel wanted to quip back that no, actually, Jean was going to do amazing on the Trojans, but he wanted to go into Championships with as few black eyes as possible.

Andrew and Nathaniel still shared a look, however.

Seconds before the Trojans were supposed to be called out, the announcer said, “We have just heard from the court, apparently there has been a change in the Trojans’ lineup.”

All Raven eyes were on the TV.

“To mimic their opponents,” the announcer continued. “The Trojans have decided to adjust their lineup so that they, too, only have nine players for the entire game. When Coach Henderson and Captain Jeremy Knox were asked about the sudden change, they said that they both agreed on it. It was Knox’s idea, and he wanted to see if the Trojans were good because they truly were, and not just because they were a team of twenty-eight going against a team of nine.”

Holy shit, Nathaniel thought. The Foxes could do this.

The Foxes, because of their small numbers and the fact that their third striker, Janie Smalls, barely played in games anymore, were forced to play both halves with barely any subs. For months, they trained playing full hour and a half games. While being small in number, they most likely dominated other teams in endurance. A huge team like the Trojans never had to worry about not having any subs; they could switch out people as they pleased.

It seemed that Jeremy Knox not only had a sense of fairness, but knew how to make an even match.

“Jeremy Knox is an idiot,” Riko said, his voice full of scorn.

“Jeremy Knox is smart,” Nathaniel said, making forceful eye contact with him. “What he said was completely right. When you have so many players, you can switch out who you want. You don’t need endurance. Obviously a team like that is going to be better against a team of nine, no matter their endurance, because one set of players are new and energized while the other set have already been playing for fuck knows how long. Exy is a sport based on skill and strategy, and constantly switching out players isn’t a sound or fair one. Playing nine and nine shows which team really deserves their win.”

“I don’t recall fucking asking, Wesninski,” Riko spit the final word out thinking that it would hurt Nathaniel. Nathaniel smirked, knowing that Wesninski was going to be what hurt Riko instead.

Nathaniel had never seen the Foxes fight harder. They knew, he knew, the world knew, that they were only one game away from Championships, and that they’re opponents would be their most difficult ones yet. They knew they were down in players, some might argue skill, too, but they were up in endurance. And for this game, it was enough. The Trojans played their heart out for the first half, finishing it two points ahead of the Foxes. It was a start of the ignorant; they didn’t know how to make nine players last for an hour and a half. They played as if they would be switched out for next half.

The Trojans might have known how to make a powerful start, but the Foxes knew how to make a powerful finish.

When the final buzzer rang out with the Foxes two points ahead, Nathaniel actually found himself excited for Championships. The Foxes had proven to be worthy rivals, and even if Nathaniel knew what the outcome would have to be,  he was ready to see the fight that the Foxes had.

--

Kevin answered his phone on the second ring.

Andrew and Nathaniel were seated in Nathaniel’s room, across from each other on his bed. It was an hour after the Foxes’ game ended and Nathaniel was eager to talk to his old teammate.

Even though Riko wouldn’t try anything so close to Championships, Nathaniel still locked his door just to be safe.

“How does it feel to beat your celebrity crush as a Fox?” Nathaniel asked when Kevin answered. Andrew rolled his eyes.

“Great,” Kevin said. “We fought hard. It was a deserved win.”

Nathaniel was pretty sure he heard Matt Boyd shout “Fuck yeah it was!” in the background.

“Actually complimenting the Foxes?” Nathaniel questioned. “In their presence? Kevin, you’ve changed.”

“Fuck off,” Kevin said, but Nathaniel wasn’t completely kidding. When Kevin left the nest, he was a destroyed man, physically and mentally. He had never been in a situation where he did not have another half. He never had to be on his own. It was always Riko and Kevin. For the first time, it was just Kevin Day, no one else tacked on. Joining the Foxes, Kevin was difficult. He was frustrated with himself for not being able to play and even more so with his new teammates’ reluctance to listen. Kevin thought he was at rock bottom with no chance of getting out.

But Kevin did. He followed Nathaniel and Andrew in wanting to destroy the Ravens, but also started to become his own person outside of them. The Kevin he knew from the Nest would have never been so bold as to go as far as revealing the corruption of the Ravens on live television.

Kevin changed. He was a right-handed Exy player, #2 for the formerly last place Palmetto State Foxes. He was stronger, he had a better footing on the ground and wasn’t waiting for someone to pull him along, directing him how to breathe.

Kevin Day was in a better place.

“I guess we’ll be seeing you in about two weeks,” Nathaniel said.

“Twelve days,” Kevin replied. “Be ready.”

“We will be, but that’s actually why we called,” Nathaniel said. He then put the phone on speaker. Andrew’s eyes drifted to the phone now held out in front of him but said nothing. Nathaniel lowered his voice as he continued to speak. “The Foxes need to win. We all know that. But we can’t throw a game. If either of us look like we’re not trying in the first half, Coach will take us off the court.”

Kevin sighed. “I was thinking the same thing. We’ve been practicing Raven drills here, we know the techniques that can be used by and against us, but it still won’t be easy.”

“It never was easy,” Andrew suddenly said. He then took the phone from Nathaniel’s hand. “There’s one thing that can work, but you need to play smart, Kevin.”

“What is it?” Kevin asked.

“Pick a number from one to ten,” Andrew said. Nathaniel furrowed his eyebrows.

“Andrew, what does that-”

“Pick a number or I’m hanging up and breaking the phone,” Andrew threatened.

Kevin huffed out a breath. “Fine,” he said, then hesitated, thinking. “Six.”

“That’s how many points you get first half, play it well,” Andrew said. “But listen closely, Kevin. I am not giving you a point each time you try to shoot. You and Gordon have to earn it, otherwise you’re not getting it. Nathaniel will not be giving up his game-” Andrew’s eyes shot up to him. “It’s solely you and me. Play the first half well, for once second half starts you’re all on your own and what happens, happens.” Andrew paused, letting the gravity of his words sit over the three. “Have your Foxes ready because the Ravens aren’t going down without a fight.”

“I wouldn’t want them any other way,” Kevin said. “We’re ready here. Everything will be left on the court.”

“Remember what I said Kevin,” Andrew said. “Six, and it’s not guaranteed. Don’t expect an easy fight because I’m giving you something.”

“I know you’re not that nice,” Kevin said.

“I’m not,” Andrew agreed. In lieu of a goodbye, he merely turned speaker off and handed the phone back to Nathaniel.

“Twelve days,” Nathaniel repeated.

“Yeah,” Kevin said quietly. “Anything else?”

Nathaniel hesitated. Kevin was eventually going to find out what happened to Nathan Wesninski and what Riko did. But he didn’t feel like that was a conversation to be had over the phone. “It’s March now,” he went with instead. “You’ve been with the Foxes for almost a year now. How’s it been?”

“It’s been something,” Kevin said and let out something that sounded like a laugh. “But… we’ve all worked hard. These people… my teammates… they’ve helped. I thought I was going to be coming here to help them and only that but… I got so much more than what I expected.”

Kevin really, truly changed.

What he said next, Nathaniel didn’t catch.

“What?”

“He knows,” Kevin repeated. “I told him.”

Nathaniel thought for a moment, trying to figure out who Kevin was talking about, when it suddenly clicked in his brain.

“You told Wymack?” he asked. “How’d he take it?”

Kevin’s voice was so quiet that Nathaniel had to strain to hear it over the background noise. “He was upset, but not because he didn’t want… this. He wishes he could have been there more. He wants… we both want to be closer. I haven’t had the opportunity for an actual family since my mom…” Kevin trailed off and Nathaniel understood. He thought of Kevin, the boy who had his mother taken from him by the same people who took him in afterwards. Kevin, who was forced to live under a stadium for his entire life, stuck with a man who could care less about children and an exy brother who would only betray him in the end.

“I hope you get that opportunity again, Kevin,” Nathaniel said.

“Yeah, me too,” Kevin said. “Thanks.”

Nathaniel nodded. “We’ll talk to you-”

“Wait, Nathaniel?” Kevin interrupted.

“Yeah?”

There was a pause on the other line. Finally, Kevin said, “Good luck.”

Nathaniel smiled, even though Kevin wouldn’t see it. “You too, Kevin.”