#i really have to learn to say no cause these people just keep
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Pining In The Pines
Dean x reader
Word count-3843
Warnings- Angst, some fluff
Summary- Y/N and the boys have to go on a hunt in her old hometown. She's not happy to go home, and especially not when Dean makes a comment that brings up bad memories. How will she take it? And will Dean be able to make it right?
A/N- This fills my Secret Passageway square for @jacklesversebingo
First, I suck at summaries 😂 Second, this fic is a little self-indulgent. I've written it about where I'm actually from and the stigma about the people in this area. I really hope you like it!
“So, get this,” Sam started the conversation as he looked at his laptop.
Y/N couldn’t stop the giggle that bubbled in her chest. It never failed. When he found a hunt, the first words out of his mouth were, ‘So, get this.’ That’s how she and Dean knew to stop and pay attention. He had something they needed to hear. So, she tried to contain her laughter and give Sam the attention he wanted.
“Y/N…Do you have to laugh every single time?” Sam groaned but didn’t wait for a response, continuing with what he wanted to say, “There’s supposedly been a Wendigo spotted in Morehead, Kentucky. Homeowners caught it on their security camera for their driveway.”
“Morehead…Isn’t that close to where you grew up, sweetheart?” Dean wondered, looking over at the huntress beside him.
“It’s a few counties over, but yeah, it’s close enough. Did you say there was footage?” she questioned, leaning forward to look at Sam’s laptop as he spun it around for her and Dean to see.
Her breath caught in her throat as Dean put his hand on her lower back as he leaned forward to watch the video. As much as she didn’t want to admit it, she had fallen in love with the eldest Winchester. But how was she supposed to be around him, living in the bunker with him, and not fall head over heels?
It was true that he had a temper, could be a real grump, and be downright mean sometimes. But, over the years, she’d learned that his temper flared most when someone he cared about was in danger. He would be grumpy when the weight of the world had gotten almost too heavy to bear, and he tried to push it down and keep it bottled up. He was mean when he thought he needed to push someone he cared about away because he was the one putting them in danger. To her, that was just the sign of a man who had been hurt, a man who loved deeply, one who cared so much that the thought of losing someone he loved was unbearable. So, how was she not going to fall for him at some point?
But that’s as far as it went. She would never admit her feelings. She couldn’t. The likely rejection would be her end, and she would have to leave the bunker. She’d rather pine for him in tortuous silence than not have him in her life at all. So, as always, she shoved her feelings back down, focusing on the screen in front of her, and prepared for the hunt she knew was coming.
“Earth to Y/N,” Dean nudged her, clearly seeing she was in her own little world.
“Yeah, yeah. I’m watching,” she rolled her eyes, trying to hide that she was fantasizing about the green-eyed Adonis.
“Where was that pretty little head of yours?” he teased, his words making her heart ache. If only he really thought that way.
“Just thinking of what I’ll need to pack. ‘Cause we’re clearly going to Kentucky, am I right?” she lied, hoping they would buy it.
“Yeah, we have to check this out. I’ve never heard of a Wendigo this far east before,” Sam answered, getting Dean’s attention away from her. Thank Chuck.
“There’s a lot of things in the Appalachian mountains that no one knows about. Trust me, you don’t want to be caught in those woods alone after dark,” she shivered at the thought.
“Don’t tell me you’re scared of the dark?” Dean tried to tease, but she gave him a stern look that made him think twice.
“You should know that I’m not scared of the dark. I follow you into some of the darkest, creepiest places on earth. But, I grew up there, Dean. It’s not even just the monsters you have to worry about. I mean, there are bears, mountain lions, wolves…” she trailed off, not wanting to mention some of the crazy people that live in those mountains.
“Okay, okay,” Dean huffed, throwing his hands up in mock surrender, “I get it.”
“You better. You have to keep your head on a swivel while we’re in the woods. I’d hate to have to save your sorry ass from the real-life Yogi Bear,” she winked, “Because your ass will be the picnic basket.”
Dean crossed his arms over his chest, annoyed at her sarcasm as Sam laughed. Even though she was crazy in love with him, she could give him shit right back. And to be honest, she thoroughly enjoyed frustrating him. As she saw it, it was payback for him making her love him in the first place. She continued to chuckle as she went to her room to pack. Y/N didn’t like the thought of going home. Too many memories she’d like to forget. But duty calls, so she was packing her bags for the long drive to southeast Kentucky.
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“I highly doubt there’s a Wendigo here. They don’t stay in the wide-open woods,” Dean complained while trekking through the mountains.
“Dean, do you not know anything about the topography of Kentucky?” Y/N asked, shaking her head in annoyance. He’d been in a mood all day.
“Yes, sweetheart. I spend all my free time studying the layout of a state I rarely ever visit,” his sarcasm made her want to smack him in the head.
“Well, dear,” she said just as sarcastically, “Kentucky is known for its underground cave systems. You know, Mammoth Cave. One of the biggest cave systems in the world…”
“Of course! Because spelunking is high on my to-do list!”
“Oh! Look at him, Sam. He’s using big boy words like spelunking. I’m so proud of you, Dean!” she half shouted at him. Trying to keep her voice down so as not to attract unwanted attention to whatever was out there.
“Guys! Knock it off. We’re here to kill a Wendigo. Not for you two to kill each other!” Sam exclaimed, throwing his hands up in frustration.
“She started it,” Dean whined, acting like a child.
“Fuck off, Dean,” she growled as she walked ahead of them. Leading them to the caves she knew were close.
Y/N ignored the bickering between the brothers behind her as she made her way through the trees. She loved Dean, but today, she thought about leaving him in one of the caves they found. He’d been an ass since they woke up at the motel, and she couldn’t figure out what had his boxers in a bunch. They’d had to share a bed, but she didn’t think he’d be that pissed about that, but she wouldn’t put anything past him at that point. But, whatever it was, it tempted her to make him Wendigo lunch.
“Slow down, Y/N. We’re not born and raised hillbillies like you are. It’s taking us a little longer to navigate this hellscape,” Dean yelled, grumbling under his breath about her getting too far ahead.
Y/N froze. That was the last straw. Yes, she’d been born and raised in the area, but that word…Hillbilly. She’d been trying to get rid of that stigma since she left the mountains, and now hearing Dean, the man she loved, call her that derogatory term was too much to take.
“Let me tell you something, asshole! Yeah, I grew up here, but I’m not a fucking hillbilly! I’ll have you know not everyone who lives in Appalachia are backwoods, uneducated, rednecks! So, take that term, and shove it straight up your ass!” she screamed, her anger boiling over into dangerous territory.
Before either of the boys could say a word, a guttural, terrifying growl tore through the darkening woods. Y/N spun around to see what they’d been there to find. The Wendgio was only about thirty feet behind her, moving in quickly. Sam shouted for her to get behind him, breaking her out of her stupor. Once she’d cleared his line of sight, Sam grabbed his homemade flamethrower, flicking his lighter to ignite it, but nothing happened. He tried again but to no avail. Y/N’s screams tore through the night air…
“Run! Follow me!”
The boys were quick at her heels as she weaved them in and out of the trees and underbrush. Dean couldn’t help but think about how impressed he was at her agility in that terrain. He could tell she’d grown up here and knew her way around, which brought him to his next thought. How guilty he felt for saying what he had. But now was not the time to apologize. Right now, he had to concentrate on not losing sight of her and getting shredded to pieces by the monster on their tails.
“Here! Guys, hurry!” she shouted, an old moonshining cabin in her sight.
Once she reached the cabin, she flung open the door, waiting for the boys to enter before slamming it shut, silently praying that the rickety lock would hold just long enough to devise a plan.
“What the hell happened back there?” Dean asked, hands on his knees as he panted for breath.
“I don’t know! The flamethrower has never not worked before,” Sam answered with the same labored breathing as his brother.
“Well, we can figure that out later. Now, we need to figure out how to stay alive!” Y/N yelled, panic starting to set in.
“Calm down, sweetheart. We’ll be okay,” Dean tried to calm her down, but she was still too angry with him.
“Don’t! Do not ‘sweetheart’ me! You had no right to talk to me like that!”
“Look, swe- Y/N, I’m sorry. But I don’t understand why that made you so mad,” Dean spoke as he looked around the cabin for something to use as a makeshift weapon.
“That was a shit apology, Winchester. Just…just don’t speak to me until we get out of this mess,” she groaned, then mumbled, “If we live through this mess.”
“Hey!” Dean shouted, getting her attention, “We are getting out of this. Don’t talk like that.”
“Can you tell me how you plan to get us out of here? Cause I don’t see another way out except through the door that Wendigo is now trying to beat down!”
As she walked toward Dean, her foot almost went through the floor, or at least it felt like it. She stopped, pushing down with her foot one more time. The bounce under her foot had her laughing loudly, and the boys looked at her like she’d lost her mind. Dean spoke as she started to rip the rug she stood on out of the way.
“Care to tell us what you find so funny?”
“This!” she continued to laugh in relief as she pointed to the hatch in the floor where she’d been standing, “It’s our way out!”
“How do you know that? It could be just an old cellar,” Sam asked, walking over to inspect what she’d found.
“Well, as Dean so nicely put it, us hillbillies would dig secret passageways to transport the moonshine back and forth without the police seeing them. They almost always lead to an abandoned coal mine or cave opening. Sometimes other cabins.”
“Y/N, come on, I tried to apologize. I didn’t know it would upset you that much,” Dean threw his hands up in exasperation.
“Well, it did, and…” she started to argue when Sam interrupted them.
“Maybe you two can finish this fight once we know we’re not going to die? Let’s go!”
Y/N and Dean simultaneously rolled their eyes. Sam would have told them they were two peas in a pod if they weren’t in such a hurry to save their asses. Y/N was the first one down the ladder, explaining that she’d be their best bet for not getting completely lost underground, and neither brother disagreed. Dean followed, with Sam on his heels. Once they were underground, Y/N led the way, and the boys were impressed with how well she could get around in the tunnels.
After what seemed like a lifetime, Dean was going to ask if she really knew where she was going, but before he could open his mouth, they turned a corner and could see a light up ahead in the tunnel's ceiling. Y/N was climbing the ladder through another hatch before Dean knew what was happening. Maybe her nickname should be Squirrel instead of him, he chuckled to himself. As the last brother made it out of the tunnel and into another cabin, Y/N slammed the hatch, pushing an old, heavy piece of furniture over it. Luckily, this one was still quite furnished, with beds still in the bedrooms and an old couch in front of a fireplace.
“This is home until morning,” she stated, looking around, finding, albeit dusty, pillows and blankets in a closet.
“Better than nothing,” Sam shrugged, walking into one of the bedrooms and shutting the door, leaving only one bedroom for her and Dean.
“Looks like we’re sharing again, sweetheart,” Dean chuckled, trying to lighten the mood.
“Nah, take the bed. I’ll take the couch,” she whispered, not looking at him. Damn, she was still mad.
“I’m not taking a bed and putting you on an old debilitated couch, Y/N.”
“It’s fine. My adrenaline is still too high to sleep. Besides, I’ll keep watch so you can get some rest. You have to drive us back to the bunker tomorrow. I can sleep in the car.”
“Y/N…”
“No, Dean, it’s fine. Please, just take the bed. I’m too tired to argue,” she almost begged, wanting to be alone.
“I thought you said you weren’t tired?” he smirked, trying to joke, but she wasn’t having it.
“I’m mentally exhausted. I just need time to myself to wind down. Now, please, go get some sleep so we can get the hell out of here in the morning,” she pleaded, the look on her face breaking his heart. He had really hurt her with what he said.
“Okay, sweetheart. Good night,” he said dejectedly, knowing it would be a sleepless night. His guilt would make sure of it.
“Night,” she replied, turning her back to him, sitting down on the couch, staring out the window, never glancing his way. The click of the door made her wince as Dean went to bed.
Sleepless night was an understatement. Dean’s eyes didn’t close once as he lay there thinking how wrong the day had gone. He and Y/N had argued since their feet hit the floor that morning. Him being an ass was the reason for it. He hated fighting with her, but when he woke that morning, she was curled up at his side, her head on his chest. Usually, a man wouldn't complain about having a beautiful woman wrapped around him, but it tends to put you in a pissy mood when it’s a woman you love but can’t have.
Dean was ass over tea kettle for Y/N, but he’d never tell her that. She deserved so much better than being saddled with a man who could barely stand his own company most days. He drank too much, and he wasn’t good at communicating how he felt. He knew that. Sam had told him many times he needed to learn to open up, but he didn’t want to burden anyone with the shitshow that was his mind. Especially her. So, as with his other emotions, he pushed his love for her deep and tried to ignore it. Lately, that hadn’t been working so well. As he lay there telling himself all the reasons he couldn’t have her, a sound caught his attention. He tiptoed to the door, cracking it slowly, and what he saw had him rushing out the door.
“Y/N, sweetheart, what’s wrong? Are you okay?” he quizzed her as he rushed to her side, pulling her into his arms. Her sobs were what he’d heard.
“I’m fine, Dean. Go back to bed,” she hiccuped through her tears. She couldn’t tell him the full truth.
“Obviously, you are the opposite of fine. Talk to me.”
“There’s nothing to talk about.”
“Hey, look at me,” he whispered, placing her chin between his thumb and index finger to turn her face to him, “Is this about today?”
“Partially,” she admitted, trying to turn her head back to the window, but his grip wouldn’t let her.
“Y/N…I’m so so sorry. I know I was being an ass, but I had no idea it would hurt your feelings like that. Can you explain to me why? I’m not trying to fight. I honestly don’t understand.”
“I’ve tried to get rid of the ‘hillbilly’ stigma since I left this place. It's always the same thing whenever someone finds out where I’m from. There’s this image people have about people from the Appalachian mountains that just aren’t true. We’re not a bunch of ignorant, uneducated people who live deep in the woods and never come out. Unfortunately, movies and TV shows have depicted us in such a bad light that most people think that’s all we are. And when that term comes from the man you…” she gasped, catching what she almost said. But Dean caught it as well.
“The man you what, Y/N?” he asked, holding his breath. Was she about to admit what he thought? Maybe, just maybe, he could try to be better, be the man she deserved if she loved him too.
“Dean…” she whimpered, trying to turn away from him again, but he wasn’t letting her go now.
“Uh uh, say it. Say it, Y/N,” he pleaded, his eyes staring into hers, “Were you going to say the man you loved?”
“Yes! Okay? I was going to say the man I loved!” she shouted in frustration as she jumped from the couch, finally breaking Dean’s hold on her, “Now, go ahead and tell me that you don’t see me that way, tell me that you don’t want me, so I can prepare to pack my shit and leave when we get back to the bunker. Because I can’t stay there and see you every day after your rejection. I just can’t.”
Dean stood and walked to her as she stood staring out the window, her back to him after her confession. He touched her shoulder, gently turning her to face him. Her look of sadness and despair nearly ripped his heart from his chest. He thought having his heart literally ripped out would hurt less than seeing her like this. He slid his hand up from her shoulder to cup her cheek. A tear trickled down her face as she closed her eyes at his touch, and he swiped it away with his thumb.
“Is that what you want me to tell you, or do you want me to tell you the truth?” he asked softly, waiting for her to open her eyes, which didn’t take a split second. Her eyes went wide.
“What are you saying?” she uttered shakily.
“I’m saying that I love you, too, Y/N. I have for a long time.”
“But, but,” she stuttered, trying to find her words, “You were so mad at me when we woke up this morning. That isn’t how someone acts when they love the person in bed with them.”
“Sweetheart, I was mad because I opened my eyes to the most beautiful woman I’ve ever seen curled up against me, and all I could think was how I wanted it to mean something, and I didn’t think it ever would. If I’m being honest, you could do so much better. And thinking I’d never have you that way pissed me off because I’ve never wanted someone as bad as I want you, Y/N. You’re my first thought when I wake up, and I fall asleep picturing you beside me. I know I’m not a good man, and there’s someone out there that could and would give you more than I’ll ever be able to, but if you really love me, I’m going to be selfish for one time in my fucking life and ask you to give me a chance. I can guarantee that I’m going to piss you off and probably hurt your feelings again, but it will never be intentional. So, what do you say? You want to give us a shot?” He poured his heart out to her, leaning his forehead against hers as he waited for an answer.
“Dean, contrary to what you believe, you are a good man. You love with your whole being and fiercely protect those lucky enough to get that love. I know you don’t believe you deserve it, but you deserve the world, Dean Winchester, and I’d be honored to be the one to try and give it to you.”
“Really?” he asked with a million-watt smile, leaning back to look her in the eye.
“I’ve never wanted anything more,” she returned his smile, both sighing in relief.
“Come here,” he growled, pulling her face to his and kissing her passionately.
The kiss was better than either had imagined, and they both poured the love they felt for the other into it. They stayed that way until the need to breathe became too much, pulling away with smiles. He pulled her into a hug, laying his head on top of hers. They stayed silent for a few minutes before Dean broke the silence.
“So, you want to move your stuff into my room when we get back?
“I don’t know, Dean,” she pulled back, chewing on her bottom lip, “I really think we need to take this as slowly as possible. Make sure that we’re going to last.”
“Oh, yeah, okay,” he agreed, his heart clenching at the hurt he felt.
“I’m just joking,” she laughed, poking him in the ribs, “You’re not going to get rid of me now!”
“Damn it, Y/N! That wasn’t funny! You almost gave me a heart attack,” he grumbled, not finding her joke all that funny.
“I think I’m hilarious,” she smirked up at him.
“You’re something, alright. Now, how about we both try to get some rest? We have a lot of packing to do when we get home,” he suggested, leading her toward the bedroom, “You have a lot of shit. I don’t know where we’re going to put it all.”
“Ha ha,” she deadpanned, “Well, we could always get rid of your vinyl collection to make room.”
“Hey! Those are fighting words,” he growled playfully, leaning down to nip at her bottom lip.
“Bring it on, old man,” she cackled as his eyes shot up his forehead in shock.
“I’ll show you an old man!” he said in faux anger, chasing her into the bedroom.
All that could be heard as the bedroom door shut was the laughter and playful banter between the new couple, and that’s how it stayed for the years to come.
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I got to say it's honestly funny that a lot of people forget Bruce's side does have powers. He's the descendant of Morgana. It's part of why no one wants to teach him magic. Not only would he have an extreme advantage, he'd be borderline unstoppable.
(There's also the fact he's canonically labeled as a Meta Human by Amanda Waller and that he's someone she wants for the Suicide Squad. His body absorbed Nth metal, which is literally the cause of Meta Humans on Earth. Though, to be fair, this was after Damian was conceived. So it shouldn't factor into this family gene pool.)
Imagine Small-town!Reader finding out that she's also has an advantage in learning magic?
We’ve all thought of the Hogwarts!AU. Having fun with the Muggleborn!Reader finding out about that fact and going back to school with a “Suck it bitches!” attitude.
I was really having fun with a Winx!Reader, though. I just think it would be ironic for Bruce to have a literal magical-girl (GN!) child kicking ass in frills with the power of friendship while he’s all dark and broody. I really really wanted to do something with this idea. The look on Bruce and the rest of the family’s faces as they watch the however long transformation sequence would be hilarious. (Plus, the whole, adding in the descendent of Morgana thing would make it even more ironic.)
To add the yandere aspect, everyone would be thinking Winx!Reader is too sweet for Gotham and wanna keep them safe. Even after finding out their some all powerful fairy they would still delude themselves into thinking Reader needs protection because of their preconceived notions on Fairies and because that much glitter is not practical. They don’t care if you can kickass with it, the answer is no. (And, then you can have fun with idea of them trying to actually take Reader’s wings for their safety. So messed up.)
#luluramblings#answered asks#yandere batfam#yandere batfamily#batfam x reader#batfamily x reader#yandere dc#yandere batfam x reader#yandere batfamily x reader#platonic batfam#Winx!Reader
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Miss Right *.✧
request: the reader is Severus's biological daughter, her best friend is Luna. She herself is in Slytherin, despite the reputation of the house. The reader is a very kind and sweet person
The corridors of Hogwarts buzzed with excitement as students darted between classes, their robes billowing behind them. You, however, walked calmly, your Slytherin tie neatly in place, offering warm smiles to the few who greeted you. Your house’s reputation often preceded you, but you had made it your mission to challenge the stereotypes that clung to Slytherin like vines.
"Y/N!" Luna's dreamy voice called from behind. You turned to see her skipping lightly toward you, her Ravenclaw blue blending harmoniously with the castle’s stone walls.
"Hi, Luna," you greeted warmly, waiting as she fell into step beside you.
"You look radiant today," she said, tilting her head. "I think the Nargles must be keeping their distance."
You chuckled. "Maybe they’re finally learning to behave."
Luna’s airy laugh echoed in the corridor as the two of you headed to the Great Hall. Fred Weasley was already there, lounging at the Gryffindor table. His eyes lit up when he spotted you, and he made a show of standing and bowing exaggeratedly as you approached.
"Your Majesty," he teased, his grin as mischievous as ever.
"Fred," you said with mock exasperation, but your smile betrayed you. "You’re causing a scene."
"Anything for you, my dear Slytherin," he said, pulling you into a quick hug before you settled at the Gryffindor table with him, ignoring the curious looks from nearby students.
Luna sat beside you, her plate already piling with odd combinations of food. "I think some people are confused," she said casually, her gaze drifting toward a group of younger students whispering.
"Let them wonder," Fred said, his hand finding yours under the table. "We’re the best-kept secret in Hogwarts."
You squeezed his hand, feeling a warmth that chased away any lingering self-doubt. Being Severus Snape’s daughter came with its own set of challenges, but you had found solace in unexpected places—Luna’s unwavering friendship and Fred’s contagious joy.
Later that evening, you found yourself in the Slytherin common room, curled up in one of the armchairs near the fire. The room was quieter than usual, and you used the moment to catch up on your Potions homework. Your father had high expectations, and you were determined not to disappoint him.
"Lost in thought, Y/N?" Draco Malfoy’s voice broke the silence. He was leaning against the mantel, his usual smirk in place.
"Just focused," you replied without looking up.
"Must be hard, balancing your perfect grades and your Gryffindor boyfriend," he said, his tone laced with mockery.
You met his gaze calmly. "Fred makes me happy, Draco. Isn’t that what matters?"
He shrugged, clearly not interested in a debate. "Just don’t forget where your loyalties lie."
"I know exactly where my loyalties lie," you said firmly, turning back to your work.
The next day, you met Luna in the library. She was flipping through a book on magical creatures when she looked up and said, "Have you ever wondered what your Patronus would be?"
You tilted your head thoughtfully. "I’ve never really thought about it. Why?"
Luna’s eyes sparkled. "It says a lot about a person. I think yours would be something gentle, but strong.”
"Maybe," you said softly, though part of you hoped it would be something unique to you.
Fred appeared a moment later, leaning over your chair to press a quick kiss to your temple. "What are we talking about?"
"Patronuses," Luna supplied.
Fred grinned. "Yours would be a fox, for sure. Clever and sly."
You laughed, leaning into him. "I guess we’ll have to see."
The corridors were mostly empty, the few lingering students too preoccupied with their own holiday plans to notice you slipping away.
When you arrived at the clock tower, Fred was waiting, his hands tucked into his pockets and a playful grin lighting up his face.
"You’re late," he teased.
"You’re lucky I even came," you shot back, though the smile tugging at your lips betrayed you.
He held out his hand. "Come with me."
You took it without hesitation, letting him lead you outside into the crisp winter night. The snow crunched softly beneath your boots as Fred guided you toward a spot near the edge of the Forbidden Forest. There, in a small clearing, stood a table draped in a checkered blanket, candles glowing softly around it. Steam rose from two mugs of hot cocoa, and a plate of biscuits sat invitingly in the center.
Your eyes widened in surprise. "Fred… what is this?"
"Well," he began, rubbing the back of his neck, "I figured we don’t get enough time to ourselves, especially with you always hiding away in that dungeon of yours. So I thought… why not make tonight special?"
You stared at him, a warmth blooming in your chest that had nothing to do with the cocoa. "You did all this for me?"
"Of course," he said, pulling out a chair for you. "Only the best for my favorite Slytherin."
You laughed, sitting down as Fred joined you. The two of you sipped your cocoa, the rich, warm sweetness melting away the chill of the night. Fred kept the conversation light, recounting one of his latest pranks on Filch, and you found yourself laughing so hard your sides ached.
As the night went on, the conversation grew softer, more intimate. Fred reached across the table to take your hand, his thumb brushing over your knuckles.
"I know we joke around a lot," he said quietly, his eyes locking onto yours. "But I want you to know… you mean everything to me, Y/N. I don’t care what house you’re in, who your father is, or what anyone else thinks. You’re my person."
Your breath hitched, the sincerity in his voice catching you off guard. You squeezed his hand, feeling a lump rise in your throat.
"You're my person too, Fred," you whispered.
Fred smiled, leaning across the table to press a gentle kiss to your lips. The world seemed to fade away, leaving only the warmth of his touch and the steady rhythm of your heart.
When he pulled back, his grin was as wide as ever. "Good. Because I’ve got a lot more surprises up my sleeve."
You laughed, shaking your head. "With you, I’d expect nothing less."
#reader#x reader#y/n#f!reader#harry potter x reader#fred weasley#fred weasley x reader#professor snape#luna lovegood#gryffindor#slytherin#ravenclaw#hufflepuff#draco malfoy#hogwarts
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That stupid fuckandreastella blog bro. has a page dedicated to blindly hating on all the drivers except Lando, and then gets butthurt when people call them out on it. I'm glad that anon called them out. They hate on Oscar based on assumptions about him that they made up in their head to make them feel better about themselves and their washed driver. Meanwhile Lando has, by his own words and actions proven how rude of a person he is. His fans love to disguise them as jokes when they're legitimate insults and he knows those fans will defend him and he continues to do it. Half the time i don't even mind the snarky comments he makes because it's something all drivers have done, even Oscar and Max, it's part of the sport, infact media has dimmed it down otherwise it was so much worse back then, but he doesn't know when to stop, atleast max has 4 wdc to back up his temper. He's doing to much with little to show for it. His fans say it's double standards of people to shit on Lando for his 'champion mindset' when Max gets praised for the same thing. Mate what mindset? The only thing about the mindset is that he 'dreams' to be a champion, yet has never puts it into action. Max got hate for it, but did he let that peer pressure him? He took that hate and converted it into success. That's champion mindset. No unnecessary comments to undermine fellow drivers because he knows his ability. Infact he's praised Lando so many times. But Lando gets close to Max's car and suddenly max is dangerous, he's his enemy, they're not friends anymore, he loses respect for him. Hell he wanted an apology lmfaoo. And then PR was on his ass that he denied contradicted everything the next race, while max from the start was very mature about it and never spoke I'll of Lando. He can never learn to shut up when he should, and his fans are surprised he gets hated on.
Lando loves to victim play a lot, the whole Hungary drama? So that people would feel bad for him? He could've given Oscar the place back and then fight for it afterwards, but he had to cause unnecessary drama for the world to see, which by now I shouldn't be surprised about. Then he cries and whines about every driver trying to race him, tell me one time Oscar's ever begged for Lando to give the place back, even if team orders were implemented in his favor (which was only Hungary to my knowledge) It was always the team making decisions or talking to Lando, Oscar focuses on the race, based on his own merit. He knows that team has always favoured Lando and he's keeping silent, gaining experience, ultimately to outclass Lando in future seasons and I love that for him. And then the whole, Oscar never praises Lando like Lando does about him openly, is such a childish argument, because first it's literally false, Oscar has on multiple occasions subtly praised Lando when Lando did better then him post race interviews, and second, he's not contractually obligated praise him? People got mad at Oscar not 'thanking' Lando after Hungary. Why the fuck would he do that? In what world would a driver thank another driver for their win. Personally, I see all these praises from Lando about Oscar fake, just to get media's sympathy. He'll really try everything offtrack to gain an advantage but can't do it where it actually fucking matters.
Calling Oscar selfish for racing against Lando is hilarious because you're just undermining your own drivers ability. Isn't the whole point of F1 being selfish and fighting for the win? It's what max and every championship has done, and it paid off, if Lando fans call Oscar selfish then I'll take that as a compliment because they're basically saying Oscar's a soon to be world champion, so keep it coming babes. Oscar's only here for the constructors, he has no obligation to help Lando win a championship yet he CONTINUES to do so. If Lando really was championship material, he would be able to race against his teammate without crying about it, and be able to race wheel to wheel against him on track. But what do I expect, he cries about max when Max is trying to defend a championship, what does he fucking expect? Him to just let him by easily? If he did half the things max does (unfair take because Lando doesn't have half the talent max does or the courage lol) he would be closer to max in the championship, not leading but atleast closer. Oscar has done no wrong when racing Lando, he's always kept it clean, no damages to Lando's car so what's the issue? He tries his best to bring maximum points for the WCC and that should be his only obligation. If Lando was half as level headed as Oscar and actually focused on his races instead of bitching and moaning, McLaren would be miles ahead of Ferrari.
And back to hating on Oscar based on assumptions, they apparently don't like him because he's associated with mark who's homophobic and transphobic and then made ONE video with Jeremy Clarkson who again is controversial for reasons Idgaf about so by default that makes him one too. And that's equivalent to saying Lando's the same because he outright expressed support for trump. Not to mention he was associated with that rapist Yung filly or whatever. Does that make him one too?
The double standards and hypocrisy of those Norris fans will never fail to amaze me. Just what is their thought process.
Anon We think the same, I totally agree with you.
I think I love you
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i love ur room headcanons soo dearly and also ???? solbin apartment hcs ????? i am eyes-ing them sooo hard 👀👀👀
I was going to post these earlier but I spiraled thinking about their relationship and I'm constantly adding to it
ANYWAY
Why hello there young man! You want to be a wizard? No problem! Welcome to the launchpad academy! And guess what? Tuition free! Resources free! It's all free! Would you like to enroll? Great!
technically not free, by enrolling in the Mothership Launchpad Academy you are agreeing to work off the cost of your education post graduation in a position of employment at MotherShip
Congratulations on graduating! Here's your dead end job you agreed to! And here's your (temporarily) free accommodation!! How generous of us!
Your apartment is in a prime location! Close to the Mothership just in case we need you to cover shifts and so there's less of a chance you'll pass out in the street when we work the maximum legal amount of hours out of you
Now keep in mind that there are a lot of people working for Mothership and we want to keep as many of you as close as we can but you got one of our bigger apartments at a whopping 15m2!!
Why I'd say this apartment is so compact if some idiot tried to draw it they couldn't because everything is so overlapping :')
The bed is on a platform hung from the ceiling. Not a lot of headspace up there. Albins balding is caused by half stress, half whacking his head on the ceiling.
There's a little extra shelving up there and glow in the dark stickers hung to the ceiling.
He uses a stepped wardrobe to climb up to the bed
Oh no...there's just one bed
As much as I ship em Caldwell says Sol sleeps in the bathtub :( so that's canon
but I'm in charge now and I say on those cold winter nights he crawls in bed with Albin (hey if you don't ship it they work different hours they can snooze in bed at different times)
At the bottom of the stepped wardrobe there is just enough space for a desk that faces a window. The one Sol frequently jumps out of to go to work and who can blame him when you're on the hundredth and something floor; that's a lot of stairs and a busy elevator
Tiny bathroom by the entrance that somehow fits a tub in. Sink and toilet that's hidden behind the door when it opens.
The bathroom has a bunch of plants. Mostly plants that like damp climates because Sol sleeps in there and also likes it damp
Sol sometimes sleeps submerged in the water adding a few natural aromatics to the bath to help him sleep; like lavender. He learned the hard way he cannot add a bath bomb or bath salts.
Alternatively he sometimes sleeps in the tub with damp towels lining the bottom and as a blanket.
Sharing a wall with the bathroom is the kitchen. Tiny fridge under the counter. Two ring hob. Tiny oven and sink with some shelves above. Tiny everything.
And just in front the kitchen and beside that desk mentioned earlier there's a small kitchen booth.
And that's all the space they have!
Sol is so used to living in small places. First the shared dorm, tiny apartment then the tiny duck.
With the bed hanging from the ceiling Calder has to really crouch to fit in
Slightly crowded with magical artifacts that turned out to be junk from the fabricated adventures and the comics of their glory days.
Some they managed to sell to places like TGI Skydays for some extra gold. Because when some rent is being taken out of your wage you need extra cash sometimes for things like food
Sol's knitted a cozy for almost everything. Tea cozy, mug cozy, bowl cozy, even a toilet paper cozy
Sol has also knitted their Halloween costumes. They rarely get trick or treaters in the building but they always have a bowl of candy ready. Sol also likes to sit by the window and watch trick or treaters on the street and try to snipe candy from whoever answers the door to give out candy.
Sol has knitted so many holiday sweaters and Albin is too tired to care or refuse wearing them to work.
Albin does the shopping when coming home from his shift before the shops close and Sol cooks. He cooks just before Albin gets home and saves his portion for later. Albin then heats Sols food up before he heads out to his shift and before Sol comes home.
Albin also comes home with things he's stolen from the office. Enchanted stock, office supplies and mage hand is great for getting snacks out the vending machine.
Fortunately they don't have noisy neighbours because everyone is so tired when they get home to their apartments. But there's always drama happening. During the brief time Sol and Albin share at the apartment before one leaves for work they're sharing tea. What's the drama in Albins office. Who they saw leaving whose apartment when they headed out. The people arguing so loud Sol's team was called in due to the disturbance.
Albin secretly has frog merch. A keychain, a clip for his messenger bag. Just as a reminder of his best pal
Sol has a singular star keychain for Albin, cause it matches his cape and hat, and labels Albins lunches with star stickers.
These two nerds, mainly Sol, definitely scrapbook together. They've got one for all their glory days at the academy and one that only has two pages filled when they first moved in and were still excited. They'll fill it one day!
This is also how they determine who's stuff is who's. Frog mug is Sol's. Star mug is Albins. Towel with a embroidered frog. Star slippers. Frog lunchbox. Star coathook.
But it's pointless in the end when they just use each other's stuff. Maybe they just miss each other and want to use their mug and/or are too lazy to wash up their dirty mug in the sink. Who knows!
Sol has put up pictures on the wall of places he wants to go, adventures he wants to have. They have a jar of change their savings up to have a trip on their one rare day off
Sol is hopeful things will still change for the better. So hopeful that he buys things for the S-class apartment they don't have. But we'll have it some day and this pinball machine is on sale now!!!
The pinball machine is now their dining table. There are books under the front legs to level it out
Sol seems like a natural at making friends unlike Albin who's more aware of the growing rift between them from the lack of time they've spent together. Once they went on adventures everyday and had the same class schedule and now they only see each other for half an hour between shifts and on the rare days off
Albin knows Sol does a lot for him and he tries his best to find out what he can about the knights on his break to give Sol a headstart at a chance of promotion
I like to think they leave little things for each other on days they miss these 30 minutes between shifts. A note. A snack. A prank even.
Sharing a space with someone you barely see is lonely. Even seeing a mess left behind is something of a comforting reminder of their presence eases the loneliness.
They both know how much it means to leave something for the other. Because they're not alone. Never have been.
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Have you considered the comedy potential? Of Dragon and Robin teaming up to pull on of the biggest pranks in history?
And by that I mean they pretend to be father daughter
Cause like the theory is awesome but it’s so much funnier if the whole thing is just them lying
Dragon (known homosexual) - ah yes this is my daughter who I got from a woman I was in a sexual relationship with
Robin (known shitdisturber) - yes it is I his daughter who was produced through sexual intercourse with my female mother.
The whole thing gets way too out of hand during the two year arc and results in one very angry ex warlord kicking down Dragons door.
You’re right, this is so much funnier.
And people believe it because not only do they look similar enough to pull it off, but Robin’s weirdgirl energy and Dragon’s commit to any and all bits energy just. Click. Right into place. No gaps. Seamless.
I’m on Zou Arc right now and Robin is fucking with everyone like “my god, they’re cannibals”. Meanwhile, if he were there, Dragon- 100% running with her shit-stirring because it’s the funniest thing ever- would have gone “can they really be called cannibals since they’re Mink? Or does the term apply to all sapient humanoid species?” Cut to Usopp screaming because if the leader of the Revs (who’s there for whatever reason) is saying that, then it MUST be true!
Except everyone knows he’s bullshitting because everyone knows- including him- that Robin is bullshitting.
And it just kind of happens one day at the end of a discussion, back in her two year stay on Baltigo. Dragon’s been talking with her a lot, getting to know her, making sure she knows that she’s as welcome and accepted among the RA as she is with the Strawhats. The standard practice of “feed the stray cat so they know you’re a nice human and can be trusted”. You know the one.
Just.
A sip from the drink in her hand, like she’s already concocting more schemes.
“I hope you’ll forgive me, but some have been asking me- indirectly at least- if I’m your daughter. And I’ve been telling a few fibs here and there because of it.”
A twitch at the corner of his mouth, like he’s fighting a grin.
“Interesting… What sort of fibs, for the sake of keeping the story straight?”
Full shit-stirrer to shit-stirrer communication. Except it goes a little too well when Robin has reunited with the Strawhats for a while, and Dragon gets a very livid call from his dear and beloved nicotine addicted reptile. Accusing him of… sleeping with a woman? How rude! How unoriginal!
And that’s how Dragon learns that Robin’s been using her talents for fucking with people in a “good and friendly” manner to routinely put Crocodile through the wringer. Untraceable calls in the middle of the night that have the man feeling like he needs to be locked in a padded cell. Seastone muzzle and straitjacket optional.
The sudden shock of that revelation makes Dragon break, and then he’s cackling and wheezing like a madman until even the snail is concerned for his health.
“Wani, are you really that surprised that she would gaslight you for fun?”
“�� Fair point…”
Oh, if Robin wasn’t going to get adopted into his dysfunctional garbage fire of a family before, she definitely is now.
#she gets the whoopsie adoption treatment in the end#but god do people still think they’re biological#one piece#monkey d dragon#nico robin#sir crocodile#dragodile#taurus answers
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hey folks if i just casually dropped 30 frames worth of storyboards for the webseries right now do you think it would count towards my “get shit done before june 4th” mark or do i have to actually work on the storyboard some more, finish the anticipation edits, work on the Anniversary All NPCS Image, the slideshow, the songs, the anniversary rp/party, the extra content that includes the side server, the costume designs, the animation tests, the training sessions so that people can and actually WILL host the rp other than me, and/or the written version of the beta crew’s demise on ao3 that isn’t past chapter 1 yet.
#my plate is full as fuck yo#i think this. kind of. counts as a uh#vent post#question mark????#i am soooooo tired . i really want to find a way to word that to my people#like i think they KNOW by instinct or something that i do a FUCKTON of EVERYTHING around here#i just dont think they. Understand. yk.#i really have to learn to say no cause these people just keep#either Requesting me to do things or not saying anything when im struggling with whats already there#granted thats not really their fault and i have to get better at communication in general#doesnt mean im not allowed to complain though … sighs#gotta . gotta fuakcing. sighs.#as soon as anniversary things are done i can relax and actually put more focus into. you know. SCHOOL#until then i really have to encourage hosting for this week and next week#AND get that server set up so that as SOON as storyboarding for the pilot is done#i can get my animator and my writer and i can help them a bit through Those#and then we’re. fauckj. we’re Getting There#i know two yall in the server follow this blog so to you two specifically You’re Doing Fucking Amazing#professor is tired . he needs a nap so bad#i dont expect anyone to do Anything about it honestly i just want them to. know. that i am Tired.#siiiiighhhhhs. post the damn thing
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I want to preface this post by saying that I love the cat king as a character, especially one that has such a major impact on Edwin and his relationship with his queerness and learning to be okay with it; HOWEVER, I also believe that everyone that genuinely believes he should be a love interest for Edwin should read this. (Also if you just like the cat king as a character and want to understand his character better and why his and Edwin’s relationship is not something that would be healthy or “real” for either)
#dead boy detectives#edwin payne#the cat king#i do not ship them but I don’t want to hate on those who do (mostly) I just want to kind of inform people of the creators meaning for their#Relationship because I keep seeing people saying they hope they get together in s2 and it’s really confusing to me#Their relationship stems from the cat kings own narcissism and predatory behavior and Edwin’s need for someone to push him into under#Standing that his queerness doesn’t have to be torture and can be something giddy#even if he doesn’t return those feelings#The cat king does like Edwin but he doesn’t know anything about him. He likes the game and then he likes the kindness he’s shown despite#Knowing the cruelty he’s presented to Edwin#Queerness and preformance always go hand in hand#He’s a older secretly insecure character#Edwin is the younger#genuinely kind character that shows him that projecting his hurt will never get him what he wants#It’s about the isolation of queerness and the walls put up and the coping mechanism used to protect yourself even at the risk of hurting#Those just like you. That kiss from edwin was to say “I’m sorry your loneliness had caused you to be cruel. It’s the easiest way to feel.#And while I cannot and will not give you what you want or need#you deserve to feel happy and not like you have to gain the attention of uninterested people#I can’t even explain all my thoughts about their dynamic it’s just so much it’s just about the predadation from older queers because of#The trauma they’ve endured and the cycle of hurt and the way we can break the cycle with kindness while also protecting our youths by#Healing those traumas#Something the cat king learns and accepts#Off topic but I don’t like people defending their age gap because#Yes; Edwin is 86#but he died with a teenage boy brain and then spent 70 of those years in hell where he certainly was not getting his brain developed while#The cat king has possibly hundreds of years of sentience and experience. The power imbalance is not if y’all. And that part of their dynami#Is actually very clear I think but some people didn’t catch it?? Or didn’t care??? Idk man
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hello upper middle class northern usamerican tumblr user. i want to play a game. you will notice that you are in a super america convenience store in rural kentucky - you have three minutes to purchase a snack and drink of your choice and make normal small talk with the cashier. however, if you use the word "cryptid" or generally make reference to appalachia and its inhabitants as "wild", uncivilized, or lacking restraint around alcoholic beverages during your time here, i will personally tie you to the chassis of a four wheeler and tip it into the river. live or die. make your choice
#speak friend and enter#i can appreciate mothman as much as the next guy but can we stop treating appalachia like it's the subject of a richard attenborough doc#i come from a long line of hillbillies and i like to think i've got a good sense of humor about it but sometimes i am tested#like. this is not a lawless land with a moonshine still in every holler and nameless voices in the woods!! this is a normal town!!#idk maybe i'm reading too much into it but i'm just tired of the cultural fetishization of appalachia by people who aren't from here#and who don't know anything about it. like yeah you know mothman and what hooch is and that's all well and good#but do you know what the opioid epidemic really is. do you know about the structural injustices that keep people like mcconnell in power#i'm not saying you have to apply dialectical political analysis to every issue that occurs in the region to be able to have an opinion#but also like. i'm tired of people looking at places like where i grew up and making them into things they aren't#like. on the one hand we have ''ooh spooky hills!! run if you hear the trees whisper your name''#and on the other we've got ''isn't appalachia so depressing...so hashtag ethel cain core...shame it's got no value beyond aesthetics''#and on yet another hand we have ''i - a person with no ties to the region - am going to take up the cause of every social issue#occurring across the entire appalachian region so the world will see just how bad these poor hill people have it. i am very smart''#and like. it's frustrating#i'm not saying you should never speak about appalachia if something we have is interesting to you#nor am i implying that i want to gatekeep discussion of the region's issues to the community bc that won't accomplish anything#i'm just saying that like any place it's complex. it's got its good things and it's got its bad things.#and you shouldn't isolate the good from the bad or vice versa - especially if you don't know the context in which those things happen.#and for the love of god dont let your own ignorance cause you to boil down those issues into a reductive and inaccurate set of stereotypes#learn about us from us. not from tiktok not from movies and for christ's sake not from hillbilly elegy. i hate that fucking book#anyway that got weirdly serious but i mean it. putting appalachia as a talking point up on the shelf until y'all can speak intelligently#ok to rb
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It's getting to the point where instead of being encouraged, I just get pissed when people tell me their friends' success stories with getting jobs as software devs without formal education.
Everyone is like "oh yeah my friend did it without a degree, you can too!" And I'm like ok how did they get past the auto rejectors that won't even look at you if you don't have a degree? How good were they before they were hired, and who supported them while they educated themselves? Or who agreed to take them under the wing and give them a chance even though they were green?
I know people are trying to be encouraging but it's starting to feel less like "I believe you can do it" and more like "if you haven't done it yet, what's wrong with you?" They'll be like "you don't need a degree to succeed, just a willingness to learn" and I'm like, I know that as well as anyone, but to the people responsible for making budget decisions, I'm too much of a risk. What do I have to show for myself to them?
Like at the end of the day it just feels like either these folks were super lucky or I'm super unlucky and either way, hearing their stories doesn't usually help or encourage me. I'm fighting an uphill battle here trying to convince folks who think we're in an economic downtown, that a US-based junior developer is a good investment. Yuck. If you don't have anything helpful to say then at this point just don't say anything 😭
#I've always done my best learning on the job#and I'm an extremely loyal employee#to a fault definitely#but nobody is hiring junior devs or if they are it's ALWAYS offshore#I'm busting my ass trying to learn enough to make myself look like the viable candidate I think i probably am#but I'm trying to learn around a full time job and I'm the sole breadwinner and have been for years#which is fine! i don't mind! but it does make it hard to progress in something so brain-intensive when 40hrs per week is eaten by my job#and it's just a really bad time to be looking for work as a developer#idk anything about the economy but whether or not we're in an economic downturn. execs think we are#and their opinion is in some situations more influential than actual truth. this is one of those situations#my company keeps saying they're in the best financial spot they've been in since before the pandemic#but the only non senior devs they are hiring are offshore#which sucks bc they used to be really good about hiring for devs internally among people who proved their worth#i missed the last wave of that by about two years#anyway. I'm just frustrated and annoyed#stop telling me your friends' success stories unless you have specific actionable feedback#and even then think twice if you aren't in tech yourself cause i get a lot of weird advice#or unless you're offering to connect me with your friend who can either mentor me or get me a job themselves#I'm tired of hearing about it#'just put yourself out there!' just put yourself out of my earshot
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and another thing, I'm sick of people acting like they/them pronouns are just the third gender instead of being gender neutral/outside of the gender binary. idk who decided that they/them pronouns when referring to a person of unknown gender is misgendering & transphobic but they need to go fuck themself i think
#''but that's a strawman argument! no one said that!'' yeah they did. i'm mad about it because i've seen it on tumblr#there's whole posts saying that if you use they/them pronouns instead of just automatically knowing the correct ones you're transphobic#if i can't find pronouns on someone's blog i'm just gonna defer to they/them. as i have for the past 20 years#not to sound like That but i think people need to calm down. is they/them pronouns really something to get mad at#........................................................................................................#huh actually i just realized something. is it because of the whole transwomen getting they/them-ed thing#that people now just associate nonbinary pronouns with transphobia. because they're fucking stupid#holy transphobia batman! they're blaming the pronouns instead of the person!#i just came here to rant i didn't actually expect to find out the real reason why or anything#for real you can't expect people to automatically know your pronouns. people aren't mind readers#you are probably gonna get misgendered. you have to stop assuming it's actively malicious every single time#as someone who has had people misgender me all the time throughout my life i literally don't care#because it doesn't fucking matter. because i can tell when people don't mean to cause harm#& the people who do i don't give a shit about because fuck em#like i get the anger & how it can feel so righteous but also you have to learn when to shut up & stop to think#''is this actually malicious or am i just angry'' is a great question you need to keep at the front of your mind
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some of yall are so hypocritical it's not even funny anymore
#that was sooo unnecessary#and i can say it whole heartedly fuck it#no cause if you don't want drama you ignore or confront privately#or yeah make call outs once or twice we get it#if you're really gonna talk about having a life and then proceed to purposely cause more scene#like idk maybe learn from diti or cleo#they either ignore or confront you either publicly or privately#and then solve it#not just keep dragging it on and on and on#like ik it sucks to be brought again in people's convo but if you didn't care you wouldn't care to drag it out SO much#rest it lesve it ignore it don't fuel it preach what you practice
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im really just struggling at this point again to think that i can do anything with writing. or that im any good at it, that the things i make are any good or worth anyones time. that what little i manage to push out rn is even worth the effort of even making
#idk. i keep looking at the hanahaki and that bombed pretty well. just like everything before it#and yeah sure maybe i should give it a bit more than three days but in the hell scape of online its already been forgotten#ppl arent gonna find it going forward either if they havent looked at it already#just.. its not that just with this. its everything. it takes me so much to get writing these days and its just not giving me much back#i mean it makes me happy to create (i think) but beyond that its just a waste of my time and already limited energy i have#its just not worth it i think. who fucking cares#i know i keep saying this and then turning around to make something again just to burn myself again and repeat the cycle cause i never learn#it is what it is. i know i cant make people care even if i try. i honestly dont know why im trying#maybe i just really actually need to step away. like. for good#im just not good at anything maybe i'll get it through my thick fucking head one day#how its nothing but disappointments and misery one day after another. and almost always self inflicted. yay#sorry you dont care its fine im just sad again
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I just wanna say thank you for reblogging all the stuff spreading awareness of recent antisemitism that you have recently. You are the only person I follow who isn't jewish who I've seen do so at all (Unless I'm mistaken and you are jewish too). I know not everyone is aware of every single bad thing happening in the world at any moment, and don't think people HAVE to reboot about negative events or whatever, but how much you seem to care really warms my heart and reassures me we aren't alone (Unless, once again, I am mistaken and you are jewish)
👍but nah i'm not jewish, just pissed off
#doing the talking for this one IN the tags bc i would really rather be answering this privately lol#feels so weirdly like. performative. to say it out in the open but whatver#i just have so much. anger. abt this shit#every time i turn around and learn about some random history/culture event or fixture its like#'oh yeah and originally this got started to shit on jewish ppl' and its just like how is this so deeply fucking ingrained in everything#and like i'm black so. without trying to compare the two too directly for obvious reasons#i do in some ways understand the thing with the whole system being slanted against you like that#AGAIN not comparing 1:1 because the history of jews being scapegoated for everything ever and always getting the shit end of the stick#is like leagues apart and beyond stuff thats gone down w/ blacks' histories#but i get the infuriation and the sting of people just. not fucking caring or even NOTICING The Issues#to be clear i am unbelievably sheltered and ignorant about like every culture ever+ usually unmotivated to search things out on my own#so endless thanks to my jewish friends/mutuals for just bein themselves and passively keeping me like. informed.#abt basics for not being antisemitic and how to respect jewish culture#cause god knows im not gonna hear it out in everyday society or whatever#yeag. and anyway i also have personal beef#from being raised christian and having to get away from [gestures broadly at the whole of christian teachings]#and im like. you killed people for this? to do things this badly? you stomped out their culture and practices to bring THIS into the world?#literally fuck off and die nothing you taught me is even a fraction as... idk. rewarding? as the fragments ive seen of jewish culture#rewarding or like. hopeful or meaningful maybe. its hard to put an exact word to it but to speak it more directly-#i am Wildly Misanthropic but whenever i learn stuff about jewish culture im like.#you know if these sorts of ideals were more widespread i probably wouldn't hate humanity so much.#[i also feel this way abt native americans but thats a whole ass other thing.]#[similarly seeing people whose ideals i also value being consistently treated like shit tends to just fuel the misanthropy soooooo...]#its like these are the people who actually know how to live and this is what the greater populace thinks of them? lmao ok#[to be clear i live in the usa so you can imagine the kind of culture im Actually exposed to lolllll]#at any rate reblogging a post on social media really feels a negligble gesture but im glad it's appreciated nonetheless
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i don't feel like studying any of the subjects from The Plan rn but everything else is so boring that i also don't want to waste time on like watching content or something and i would rather switch subjects then give up on studying for the day and by old me standards ive already done enough but new me i still feel like i can do more but i don't know what ughhhhh this is torture
#okay so The Plan is#i mean not that anyone would care or understand but i like writing on tumblr like a diary#The Plan is to finish law in one month so i can give the online test and this js non negotiable because there's two#online tests and i have to do ATLEAST one before this year ends or it will be too much#and then to finish my backlog of direct tax till like 10th so i can give that test and be caught up with the rest of the class#and there's about 35 more 2 hr lectures to go (rip me)#oh also i haven't touched audit in ages and backlog is getting to the i can't breathe under this burden levels and classes resume on like#10th 11th something and i want to rejoin with them#the plan is to have all this done by november so in December#i can focus on catching the fuck up with fr and afm because like ive attented SOME classes like sparingly#and i know it but very upar upar se so i have to do it properly once or ill die#yeah that's it that's The Plan#it's doable i think i calculated hours days wise and everything#but like. theory subjects are fucking hard to do constantly because either they're boring asf (like law and audit)#or they're complicated and make me cry from frustration (like direct tax)#mann.#now that im actually studying#i feel so irrationally scared for how chill and like. blaise attitude i had towards inter exam#i had absolutely no idea everyone else was studying so deeply like tax syllabus first half is the exact same as inter#just a little advanced and sir keeps saying ye toh aapne inter mein padha hi tha and im like hain??? bhai itna sab tha????? i had no clue😭#like how tf did i pass my dad says not to tell anyone that i didn't really study for it cause ppl will think#aise hi farzi ca finalist ban gayi but like tunblr so wtvr#but yeah how tf??? could i pass???????#like i actually start to panic when i think about how less i had studied which makes no sense since it's not like they can#take away the result or reverse it or anything it doesn't matter now#but like just woah. like i can't even explain#i remember for tax all i watchef was marathon and usme bhi i got bored (THE DAY BEFORE EXAM!!!) so i skipped#the main topics that had crazy weightage and just did a number of tiny topics and studied only enough#to get passing#dt irl is VAST i can't believe these people learn such specific things that if iss date se iss date mein hai toh section 54 ka exemption
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Lord give me energy today eueueue
#dora daily#sm things piling up but my brain says NO#I can’t even do basic things 😭#it’s genuinely so hard to talk to others#aaaaaaah#the reason is bc I’ve forced myself into contentment with the prospect of being alone cause there’s just so much I can do that would bring#me joy in solitude but#that’s what I’ve always been doing part of the reason I talk a lot is bc that’s how I am in my head#like things firing at 100miles per second bc that’s how I used to keep myself entertained when I was younger#when everyone would have buddies and I wouldn’t#and it works now bc everyone takes ten business days to reply that it’s completely made me genuinely grossed out of social interaction#but I can’t live in La La land forever#pls if only kaveh existed I wouldn’t need another means of socialisation eueeuue#everyone is so impossible to understand; coming from a girl who has always been called utterly INSANE for how hard she hyper focuses on#small cues and signals and detecting discomfort and whatnot. I turn my brain off for one second and yet again the same shit happens it’s so#unfair that everyone can be relaxed and I ought to be on high alert 24/7#I also find it hilarious and pathetic when people pretend to be people smart but they’re really not … it’s genuinely embarrassing#like bitch when you get to my level then we will talk istg …#Istg if this is the autism thing everyone’s been telling me im screwed cause#I don’t want yet another issue#but it’d make sense like how people seem to draw away despite there being nothing wrong with me#how people tend to agree with everything someone else says but the moment I do it it’s heinous#how I have physically had to learn social cues and trial and error#with the errors altering my brain chemistry#that unwavering sense of justice that makes me so very uncomfortable if not fulfilled that I shut up about so I can actually hold down#friends. God knows how every interaction I have with a person is so orchestrated so almost artificial and ‘yes-man’ core that I don’t even#believe said person likes ME bc idek who I am and bc if I don’t agree w#everything no matter how many times someone says I won’t get mad …. trust me they do they’re all liars and manipulators even if they don’t#intend to#the scary fascinations I’ve had when younger
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