#i need everyone else to understand shes so pretty and attractive and good and sweet

[yoku-yukihime]

If only I could make the world see you through my eyes.

[avonne-writes]

would love to see nr. 18 nr. 22 and 37 from the prompt list together!! «truth or dare» with «secret relationship» where their relationship get exposed bc john gets dared to kiss someone else, and gale is possessive

After such a long wait, I finally had a chance to write this. Thank you for the prompt! 🩷 Teenage awkwardness ahead, from an outsider POV.

Truth or dare - HS AU, beginning of Year 10

Why is it that the jocks at Olivia's school throw the lamest parties ever? Her older sister always used to brag about how much fun she had at these things back in the day - two years ago - but Olivia's just bored. Like, it's an absolute snoozefest. Putting on makeup for this wasn’t worth it. Not to mention the two hours she spent straightening her hair and looking for a top that complemented her green eyes. With the shit music they're playing, the whole thing was just a waste of time.

They’re all sitting around in a cramped living room that smells like her brother's socks and the P.E. locker room, and most of the boys are not even cute at all. They all have such bony arms, ugh. Olivia is attracted to real men, older boys. At least two years older. That's where she draws the line. The guys in her year are way too immature for her attention.

Okay, fine, if she really had to choose, Gale Cleven isn’t half bad. He’s kinda fit, more muscular than these soccer boys who can’t stop talking about Messi or whatshisname. He’s got beautiful blue eyes. A piercing stare. Zapphire orbs that glitter with interest when they meet Olivia's… She sighs, taking a sip of her soda and taking a furtive look at Gale where he's sitting cross-legged on the floor across from her. She likes boys with an actual personality. Gale has shoulder-length blond hair, which is pretty unique, but he’s a bit too quiet. What if he's boring too?

Plus, dating Gale would come with the unfortunate side effect of having to spend time with Bucky. Olivia had a crush on him last year, but it faded after a while, and she hates him now. She doesn’t get why he's so popular when he's just a stupid player. He flirts but never actually asks you out. Her past self was dumb for falling for his bright smile and loud personality.

Maybe, going for someone quiet is just what she needs. No, not quiet - mysterious. Yes, that's a better word to describe Gale. He’s smart and sweet and fit, and he wears neat clothes, not just plain, wrinkled t-shirts like Bucky. He takes care of himself. And he doesn’t have acne either. She bets he smells nice. Probably like - like cedar and sandalwood and an earthy, musky scent that she would still smell on her clothes hours after kissing him…

Suddenly, Gale's gaze flickers over to her, so she looks down for a second. Heat rises to her cheeks. But, she read somewhere that if you can keep eye contact with a guy for at least 5 seconds, they will begin to like you, and if it goes up to 10 seconds, they fall in love with you. It sounded like a good method, so she has decided to go for it every chance she gets. Telling herself that she's a bold and pretty girl, she looks up and finds Gale's eyes again. One, two, three - Ah!

It was so close! But Bucky had to choose that moment to tug at a lock of Gale's hair. Can’t he just leave Gale alone? Why does he need everyone’s attention all the time?

Disappointed, Olivia turns back to her conversation with her friends, but she makes sure to glance at Gale every now and then, to give that eye contact another chance. For the most part, Gale doesn’t return her gaze, but she can understand why - Bucky's constantly talking to him, his pale face flushed, sweat on his neck and a permanent smile in his eyes. It would be sweet if it wasn’t so annoying. Like, obsessed much?

She wonders how those two get along so well. Gale is a sensitive boy, a romantic soul, she can tell, and Bucky's all about video games and whatnot. And the way he's sitting is so irritating too, can’t he close his legs? His thigh is brushing Gale's knee. It’s clearly making Gale uncomfortable, because he fidgets and bounces his leg a little. Trying to make Bucky catch on that he’s way too close, no doubt. He gives Bucky an awkward smile, looking at him from the corner of his eyes, and instead of realizing how overbearing he is, Bucky just hands Gale his own drink. As if he expects him to hold it for him or something. Ridiculous.

“Dave!” One of the soccer boys yells at their host over the thumping beat.

“What?”

“I'm fucking bored, man!”

“Go fuck off then!”

The boys flip each other off, and some of the others laugh as if it’s the funniest thing they've ever seen, even though this happens every single day at school. Olivia rolls her eyes. Is it some weird male ritual to insult each other over literally nothing while the others laugh like a pack of demented hyenas? This is why she has given up on these dumbasses.

Sweet Gale would never act like this. He’s a gentleman. The kind of man who'd give his lady a thousand red roses on Valentine's before telling her he loves her. Olivia can feel this in her heart.

When she looks at him again, she sees him pull his knees up and rest his elbows on them, then his head on his folded arms, looking at Bucky. With his usual clueless grin, Bucky says something to him that Olivia doesn’t catch, then he bends one of his knees to bump it into Gale's.

Oh my God, Olivia thinks, this boy really can’t take a hint.

She has suspected for a while that Bucky is socially impaired, not in the introverted weirdo way but like, he’s too much and he doesn’t realize it. How his friends put up with it, she has no idea. But it's clear that Gale is pulling back now, because he pushes Bucky's knee away, and when Bucky grabs his wrist in retaliation, he starts scuffling with him with one hand.

“O-kay, who wants to play spin the bottle?” Dave calls out. A mix of cheers and boos follow.

Excited, Olivia perks up. Gosh, this would be the perfect opportunity!

Her mind speedruns a daydream for her. She imagines Gale spinning the bottle, biting his plump lip nervously as he waits for it to slow down. When it rolls to a stop pointing at Olivia, he’d relax though. He might have been hoping for this, for a chance to get closer to her. He might even give her a shy smile. As everyone watches, he’d take her face in his gentle hands, wait for her to nod to make sure it's okay, and then he'd lean in ever so slowly and press a tender kiss to her lips. He’d pull back an inch after a second, but he wouldn’t be able to let her go just yet - he’d close the distance again, not able to hide his passion any longer.

Pleasepleaseplease, she chants like a mantra, curling her legs under herself to sit as attractively as one can on an ugly IKEA rug, leaning against a couch. Her best friend shares a look with her and giggles as Benny DeMarco chugs down half a bottle of Fanta just to have something they can use to spin. That one's going to be an alcoholist, Olivia has no doubt. And he doesn’t even have blue eyes. Not her type.

As Dave lowers the volume of his trash music - finally! - some of the other girls start protesting the game choice. Olivia narrows her eyes at them. She doesn’t mind giving a quick peck to a couple of clumsy fuckboys if she gets to kiss Gale in the end. But if these girls ruin this for her -

“Fine! Fine, Jesus.” Dave raises his hands in surrender, and the girls stop whining. “How about truth or dare then?”

That seems good enough for everyone. Spin the bottle would have given Olivia a bigger chance at getting to kiss Gale, but whatever, truth or dare isn’t so bad either, and some of the questions might be funny at least. Again, she tries to catch Gale's eyes, running a hand through her long brown hair, but he’s looking at the floor and smiling at whatever Bucky's whispering in his ear. After a moment, he laughs and tells Bucky to shut up.

Glaring at Bucky, Olivia wills him to listen this time.

The game is pretty tame at first. A few people are asked if they have a crush on anybody, Dave is dared to show them his underwear, which is something Olivia will have to scourge from her mind, then her best friend has to tell them her most embarrassing memory. It’s quite funny. As they get more into the game, the questions start getting better too, until finally, the bottle lands on Gale. Olivia can feel her cheeks burn with excitement. Predictably, he chooses truth first - but that’s okay, because he, too, is asked the usual question:

“Do you have a crush on anyone?”

Some of their classmates groan, and Dave throws a handful of chips at the person who asked this lame question again, so the boy adds, “In this room?”

Olivia holds her breath. She tries to tell herself that it doesn't matter if Gale says no, it’s not like he’s the only guy in the world, but her heart still races as Gale's lips twitch into an unreadable smile. So sexy and mysterious!

“Yeah, I do.”

A few whoops and laughter follow, and Bucky, obnoxious as ever, whistles. Something about that makes Gale laugh. The way his nose crinkles is the most adorable thing Olivia has ever seen. Suddenly, she wonders if the knowing looks Gale shares with Curt and DeMarco are a sign that the boys know who the lucky girl is. It has to be a sign. She tries to see if any of them look at a particular girl, and she flushes when DeMarco's eyes land on her. She tries to read his gaze for long seconds, but when he smiles, she glances away, embarrassed. If it’s her, she'll know soon enough!

They play a few more rounds without anything interesting happening. When it’s her turn at last, Olivia chooses dare, but her task is to drink a sip from a disgusting concoction they mix for her using ketchup and soda. The smell alone is enough to make her gag, but she pinches her nose shut and does it. It's absolutely vile, and she hates how it lingers in her mouth.

Washing it down with water doesn’t help much either. She's on the brink of getting upset about it, when, like a literal knight in shining armor, Gale reaches across the space between them and offers her a bubblegum.

“Oh.” Olivia blushes, tucking a strand of her hair behind her ear as she looks at Gale’s kind expression. When she reaches out, her fingers brush Gale's. “Thank you, Gale.”

Even saying his name makes her heart flutter. And then the way he smiles at her in return!

As she pops the gum in her mouth, he also puts one in his, and at that moment, she feels a synchronicity she has never felt before. It’s an incredible feeling to be so attuned to someone that without talking or practicing, you just mirror each other instinctually. It can't be a coincidence. Even if he's not doing it on purpose, Gale is connected to her, she can tell.

Gosh, what if it really happens tonight? Most of her previous crushes ended in disappointment - khm, Bucky - but this time, she has much higher hopes. She knows her senses are getting better, that she can pick up on all the signs easier. Tonight might just be the night.

She feels giddy from this thought, right until it’s Bucky's turn to play.

“Truth or dare?” Curt asks him with a mischievous look in his eyes.

Bucky's trademark cocky grin makes an appearance. “Gimme your worst, Biddick. Dare.”

Curt’s smile widens. “Take Buck's bubblegum out of his mouth and put it in yours without using your hands.”

“Ewww!” Most of the room alternates between gagging, laughing and looking at Curt in awe for coming up with such a disgusting task. Even with her small crush on Gale, Olivia wouldn’t do it, it’s too much. Although… Actually, if it got her a kiss, maybe she would.

As she goes through this thought process, she comes to the horrifying realization that Bucky would have to kiss Gale to complete the dare. She blanches. It wouldn’t mean anything, of course, but poor Gale, this isn’t even his dare.

One of the girls takes out her phone and starts recording. Bucky just winks at her like he’s not fazed at all by the dare. He’s such a fuckboy, honestly. Olivia hates how that behaviour still makes something in her belly stir. She watches with her eyebrows trying to disappear under her bangs as Bucky leans into Gale's space, looks at his lips, then bats his eyelashes at him in an over-the-top gesture. Gale just looks amused.

“Can you please give me your gum, Buck?”

“Hey!” Curt tries to interrupt through a surprised laugh.

“You didn't say I couldn’t use his hands.” Bucky shrugs, still grinning, and opens his mouth. His tongue sticks out.

To Olivia's astonishment, Gale doesn't protest. He snickers, then reaches a hand up to his lips. In front of their disgusted eyes, he takes the chewed-up gum out of his mouth and puts it in Bucky's.

“Fuck, that's disgusting.” Dave chortles gleefully as Bucky leans back on his hands, chewing away with a smug expression on his face. The rest of the room gags, cringes and laughs until Bucky spins the bottle, then they move on to the next round.

Olivia watches Gale's face for discomfort, but he seems to have found the dare funny. He shakes his head at Bucky fondly. When his eyes find Olivia's, he gives her a sheepish smile. It makes the butterflies in her stomach go crazy with exhilaration. She grins back.

Although it started out as a total flop, the night feels like a dream now. And in dreams… well, anything can happen, right?

The game picks up after that. The dares get more challenging, the questions juicier, and even though Olivia doesn’t get the kind of opportunities she's waiting for, she finds herself having fun. Being as attentive as he is, Gale always watches the person whose turn it is, not Olivia, but she finds that endearing. She wishes he'd catch her eyes more often, but it's okay, quiet boys usually struggle with eye contact. Except for DeMarco, apparently, because anytime she glances his way, he’s looking back. She wonders if he's just zoned out or something or if there’s something else there. He’s not that ugly, if she thinks about it…

Another ripple of laughter pulls her out of her thoughts. The bottle lands on Bucky again, and he says dare before Dave has even finished asking the question.

At Bucky’s response, Dave wiggles his eyebrows. “Kiss the hottest girl in this room on the lips.”

It's simple enough. And surely, for someone like Bucky who - according to the gossip Olivia heard - can’t go without a girlfriend for more than a month, this can’t be too hard to complete. A part of her aches in the hope that it's her. Not that she wants Bucky Egan, dumb jock extraordinaire, to kiss her. It’s just nice to be kissed, that's all. And it would be flattering if he chose her as the hottest. Better yet, it might make Gale jealous.

Oh Gosh, wouldn’t that be perfect? What if Bucky started leaning in and Gale pulled him away at the last moment just to lean in himself and claim the prize? Everyone would be so shocked!

Widening her eyes innocently, Olivia watches Bucky's face for a sign. She ignores the wave of feelings that take her back to last year when she had that ill-advised crush on him. She waits for him to notice her, but he seems unable to look away from Gale’s eyes. This time, they aren't smiling. Something serious flickers between them. Bucky's eyebrows draw together in a way that makes him look like a puppy with gangly legs and arms. To Olivia, Gale's expression is unreadable, but when Gale’s lips purse, Bucky turns back to Dave.

“Sorry, man, gotta forfeit.”

“Aww, what, you getting stage fright?” Dave laughs at his own lame joke. “I was going easy on you!”

“Dude, you were just not inclusive enough.” One of the other boys pipes up. “Should’ve said hottest person.”

“Oh, right. You just want to kiss me, huh, Egan?” Dave makes an annoying kissy noise.

Bucky grins again, his previous discomfort gone. “In your dreams, Davey-boy.”

“You bet.” Dave snorts, then gestures at the circle of them sitting around. “Okay, I dare you to kiss the hottest person in the room.”

Again, Bucky hesitates. It's confusing. Olivia doesn’t know what to make of that. It’s as if she's missing a crucial piece of the puzzle, something she should have noticed already but ended up overlooking. She's still trying to make sense of it when her night comes crashing down around her like a sudden storm that leaves you shivering and cold to the bone.

Bucky reaches up with a loving but sure hand, cups Gale's cheek and pulls him into a kiss like it’s something he has done before.

Their lips meet and part with a soft, damp sound that feels loud in the sudden silence that descends on their group.

It might as well be the sound of Olivia's heart being torn apart. A deep ache blooms in her chest where her joy was planted earlier tonight. Her mind refuses to accept what she's seeing. It’s not a first kiss. It’s sure as hell not a kiss forced on two boys by a dare, it’s not a prank taken a step too far. They've done this before. A dozen, a hundred, or a thousand times. They know which way to turn their heads to make it comfortable, how to tilt their chin for the sweetest contact, how to stroke the other's hair to earn a smile.

They know how to kiss each other and they enjoy it.

With a small smile, Gale draws back an inch, but Bucky doesn’t let him go too far - he pushes forward to chase Gale's lips. Right in front of them all, Gale returns this by opening his mouth, and Bucky takes the chance to lick inside and kiss the taste of bubblegum on Gale’s tongue as if he forgot they had an audience to watch it all.

A cacophony erupts around them, everyone talking over each other in excitement and confusion.

Please tell me this was just a dare, Olivia's breath hitches in pain. Shocked into silence, she starts fidgeting with her hands in her lap. Only parts of reality seem to reach her consciousness - the words boyfriend and 8 months, and the sight of Gale's hand in Bucky's, thumb stroking back and forth. How? When did this happen? Why didn’t she notice it all this time? It's so pathetic that she wants to laugh at herself. She managed to develop crushes on two boys who were secretly dating each other.

Universe, is this supposed to be a sign?

Oh, how it hurts that she's always the one who turns out to be delusional.

As she mopes there quietly, watching the sweet smile on Gale’s face, the sudden warmth of a shoulder pressing to hers draws her attention away. When she turns to look up, her green eyes meet brown.

“You okay?” DeMarco asks. The concern in his gentle voice sounds like a balm to her broken heart.

She takes a deep breath and musters a smile. He feels warm and solid, someone you can rely on.

Well. Maybe Benny DeMarco isn’t such a bad option after all. Bucky and Gale can have each other, Olivia's probably better off like this anyway.

The next party can only be luckier than this, she's sure.

[lynnlovesthestars]

Bg3 male matchup plz

Gender: cis female

Pronouns: she/her

Sexuality: heterosexual ally

Zodiac: Capricorn

Appearance: 5’2 African American hourglass body (although I’m more top heavy if you know what i mean) black curly wavy hair blackish brown eyes chubby cheeks wears glasses sometimes (im far sighted so it’s usually when driving in class or at the theater)

Mbti: infj

Enneagram: 2w1

Personality: kind smart funny motherly responsible empathetic anxious emotional moody perfectionist helpful people pleaser caring compassionate nerdy curious protective polite respectful indecisive fearful nervous introvert shy awkward clumsy low self esteem low confidence (more pertaining to my talents or personality then my looks) sassy sarcastic (I’m mainly these things with people i feel comfortable with like friends or family) soft spoken cute (my friends think im cute because i can be pretty innocent plus I’m small physically)

Likes: animals books reading writing fantasy magic sci fi anime music video games friends alone time learning personality quizzes sweets and bread helping being a part of something bigger than myself

Dislikes: spiders loud sounds people i care about not caring for themselves (im a hypocrite on this i take care of everyone else but not me) not being listened to weird holes and patterns math and tests (I’m being tested for a math disability and i have test anxiety)

Love language:

Giving: acts of service gift giving and physical affection (if they’re ok with it)

Receiving: words of affirmation and physical affection (although i can be shy about it)

Extra: i pace a lot i sing when im alone i talk to myself im a picky eater (mainly with textures) i have a cat i have minor ehlers danalos (a hyper mobility disorder) but it doesn’t hurt me like it does my sisters i get abdominal migraines which is basically like a migraine but instead of headaches it’s nausea

Thank you

hii, first of all sorry for being late, ive been keeping this ask in the drafts because of my fear of commitment (me and posting don't go along well, xD im usually there keeping everything in the draft n never showing anyone so this was holed up with some other stuff..) nevertheless here i am and i'd say you waited enough so here i go,,

I think every motherly person deserves their fatherly like opposite, this being said i think you'd pair up lovingly with Gale.

He does give that father, dad, parent vibe, doesn't he? ahah

I think you are so kind and bearing that you do need some care as well and Gale never fails at that. Not to say that he babies you, nor that he treats you as a child, but he definitely spends and indecent amount of time and effort in coddling you, making sure your every wish is taken care of, but most of all it's like he's your other half.

Before you know he can finish your sentences, he knows right away when something good or bad is happening, he can almost sense it.

I do see a lot of him in you and maybe that's why i know he'd be a lovely fit. They always say opposites attract but no one is better than someone that can understand you, that laughs at the same jokes, that can empathize with you and cheer you up..

He is protective, but he gets especially caring when you have a flare up, imagine with me for a moment.

He comes home from work and finds you on laying down in agony. Whatever he's holding is dropped on the floor instantly and he's rushing to your side, thousand questions he wants to ask you, yet he knows the pain must be so overwhelming he must first help you out.

He reaches for a few pillows, propping them around you making sure you are a little more comfortable before he's off to his study for a moment to find one of his alchemic creations and comes back, assuring you that the pain will go away with it.

As he's gently massaging the mixture on the painful areas he starts talking, as if to distract you. "You know how i know this concoct will work?" And he doesnt wait for your answer cause all he wants to do is soothe your pain, entertain you. "My knees are not what they once were, so i had to come up with a remedy" He smirks as he takes a moment to kiss your stomach. "Well the first time I adventured into alchemy didn't go so well" He chuckles. "When I applied the mixture to my aching joints they started burning, and dear me i was in even more pain" He laughs as he resumes his gentle kneading and massaging, and finally you start feeling the soothing cream gently activating. His hands glow ever so slightly as if he's imbuing the tincture with magic and all you can feel is the cooling sensation rippling gently over your skin. "Doesn't it feel good now, love?" He murmurs as he doesn't stop with his massaging, despite being done with the application he still wants to care for you. "Next time just let tara know you are in pain, and i'll be here in the blink of an eye, got it?" He kisses your forehead gently. "I will drop anything for you"

[icycoldninja]

So the idea. is for a male yandere….i think it would work better as a one shot than a head canon

yandere has joined Neros little group as an expert on the occult to help him fight demons and understand any weaknesses they might have ….but he’s fallen desperately in love with Nero and are scarily jealous of pretty much everyone in his life especially kyrie….for obvious reasons. They just don’t understand why he’s wasting time on her and why he can’t see what’s in front of him….with his help Nero could very well become the next sparda….if this simpering leech wasn’t draining him of his potential

So they do the only thing they can do….summon some demons…..a small group to lure Nero away from her…and then yandere siccs some more on Kyrie…to get her out the way..,.and then comfort him in his greif I imagine it ends with an absolutely destroyed Nero being comforted by his good freind…who’s going to help him through the pain

A few more terrible tradgies and it will just be two of them…forever

hehehehe evil yandere time. Enjoy.

Just a few more tragedies (Nero x Yandere!Male!Reader)

Warning: Blood, death, and yandere behavior ahead. If you are uncomfortable with these themes, DNI.

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You'd joined the Devil May Cry team a few months ago as an expert on the occult. Though the devil hunters were skilled, demons were a unique, diverse species, making it necessary to bring in someone who studied them; someone who knew all their strengths and weaknesses. Since you were the best in the business, it only made sense that they would pick you.

That's all this was supposed to be: business. So why did you develop such intense feelings for the young devil hunter Nero? Why was it that every little thing he did captivated you? Why could you never stop thinking about him; fantasizing about him, imagining wild scenarios and all the things you wanted to do to him?

Simple, it was because you were a yandere, but your fanaticism had been dormant until now.

Yanderes like you wish for nothing more than to make their obsession belong to them, these desires soon growing so dark and uncontrollable, the yandere essentially becomes a demon themselves.

This was the way it was with you; every night, as you sunk into sweet dreams consisting of nothing but Nero, your heart became more and more encased in darkness. Before long, this darkness had tainted your emotions and thinking, causing you to develop unwarranted bitterness towards all those who were present in Nero's life.

Specifically, that simpering bitch Kyrie, Nero's "one and only true love". You'd seen them together multiple times, quickly growing jealous of how happy they looked together. Why did Nero settle for that homely, exaggeratedly optimistic and cheerful fool who would most likely age to become a nagging old hag? Why didn't he see you? Surely, you were more attractive; surely you had more to offer him than her. Not only that, but he was letting this bland, boring girl dim his potential, ruining his future! He could become the next demon king, stronger than even Sparda himself, if only he could get past this annoying, fleshy hurdle, which he would never do, because she had conditioned him over the years to rely on her for emotional stability.

Not to mention, that girl took up nearly all his time, stealing him away from you! You felt so upset, so tired, so lonely and lost without him. Why couldn't Kyrie just get out of the way?! Why couldn't Nero get rid of her and be with you instead? Just the thought of Nero spending the rest of his life with someone else made you so angry, you could feel your temperature rise, your blood boil, and your head ache. You'd wrap your arms around yourself in a futile attempt to comfort yourself, but it was meaningless. You needed Nero--and only Nero's touch to calm down.

After many nights of tossing and turning restlessly in your sleep, you decided that in order to get your beloved to notice you, you would have to remove Kyrie from the picture entirely. Of course, simply scaring her away wouldn't work, since she was so pathetically loyal and practically guaranteed to come trotting back like a lost puppy. No, in order to get Nero all to yourself, you'd have to take extreme measures.

While that sounds clichéd, it really wasn't, because your methods of removal exceeded that of any yandere that might have preceeded you because you decided to enlist the aid of the very creatures you specialized in destroying.

In the wee hours of the night, you left your home and headed out into the woods, bringing a long, sharp knife and pistol for protection. You ventured deep into the woods, ignoring the various glowing eyes that glared out at you. The beasts lurking all around knew better than to mess with you--you were a man on a mission, someone who should not be trifled with.

You continued into the woods until you came to a large clearing where various symbols and images had been burnt into the ground. This was a ritual site commonly used by fanatics and cult members, all for the same purpose as you were about to use it for: summoning demons.

After laying your supplies in order, drawing the proper runes, and whispering the incantation, you couldn't help but ponder the nature of your current predicament. Most of the time, people who did this were maniacal psychopaths who belonged in mental institutions, so did that make you one of them? Of course not. You were an exception to the rule. You were definitely not crazy.

A few moments passed before a growling demon emerged from the circle of runes, followed by an army of Empusas, among other creatures. They glared at you menacingly, but since you were the one who brought them here, they did not attack--yet.

"Go," You said, pointing to the forest exit. "Some of you find the devil hunter Nero--but don't kill him. Just distract him. The others, go after Kyrie, his pathetic girlfriend. Oh, and don't just kill her, don't even leave a corpse behind."

The demons nodded and scampered off, vanishing into the night, as was natural, since it was their home, in a sense. Feeling immensely proud of yourself, you jaunted out of the forest, more than eager to locate Nero so you could watch the chaos unfold.

This wasn't a sign of insanity--absolutely not--you weren't crazy.

A few minutes later, you arrived at Nero's house, where the carnage was on full display. Nero was about 80 feet from the front door, fending off the demons encroaching on the house, while Kyrie cowered in the kitchen in fear. You could see her through the window; saw the horrified expression on her face, and smiled. The bitch was getting her just desserts. Good.

A group of Empusas shattered the window and clambered in, followed by a Hell Caina, who, with some difficulty, managed to clamber in through the window. One good swing of its scythe was all it took to kill the useless girl; her lifeless, bloody corpse collapsing to the ground after uttering one final scream.

That scream resonated throughout the air, echoing in your ears, bringing an even wider smile to your face. That's it. Now all you had to do was swoop in like the great and benevolent friend you were and ease poor Nero's aching heart.

Nero heard Kyrie's distressed scream, and in a fit of panic, demolished all the demons that remained before racing back into the house at light speed. When he saw the body, a guttural, truly pained cry left his mouth, reverberating in the air twice as loud as Kyrie's death screech. After hearing this, you felt genuinely troubled. While you hated Kyrie, and everyone else who got between you and Nero, you really did love that white haired devil hunter and hated seeing him sad.

Naturally, you decided to convienently arrive on the scene, surprising and relieving Nero all at once. He was shocked that you were here, since you had no reason to be, but was glad nonetheless because he'd just suffered a serious loss.

"Hey, Y/N," He said, voice brittle and eyes wet. "What-what are you doing here?"

"I happened to be in the area," You answered, gently. "Just...gathering materials for my research."

"Ah, ok," Nero muttered, covering his mouth with his hand. "I-I'm glad you're here...this...is crazy." He gestured sadly to the dead girl in the corner, tears now streaming down his cheeks.

"I can imagine," You responded, kneeling next to him and placing a reassuring hand on his shoulder. "And...well...if it helps...I'm here."

These words weren't fake; you truly loved and cared about him, even if your methods for expressing this love were out of pocket. You were sorry things had to be this way, but hey, sometimes, certain actions need to be taken.

Nero was grieving, deeply so, and since a good friend of his whom he happened to find rather attractive was offering a shoulder to cry on, it would be a crime not to seize this opportunity.

"Thank you, Y/N," He mumbled tearfully, burying his face in your shoulder. "You're an angel."

Ironic, wasn't it? Thankfully, the young man couldn't see the maniacal grin as your arms wrapped around his torso, holding him close to you, or your true nature would have been exposed, but that didnt matter now.

Everything was coming together perfectly, exactly as you wanted.

Just a few more heartbreaking tragedies, and Nero would be yours forever.

[osunism]

Summary: A young widowed sorceress seeks protection under the aegis of the Honored One, but he has a better idea for keeping her out of the clutches of her dangerous clan.

Warnings: Gojo might be a lil’ toxic, there’s some smut in this story [a lot actually the attraction is pretty instant], and it’s already on AO3 if that’s the format you prefer.

II.

     Over the course of dinner, they talk. Gojo isn’t prone to ultra-spicy food, being a sweet-tooth minion, but he marvels at Asabé’s casual handling of Thai levels of spice. When he asks about it, she mentions off-handedly that the food from her homeland is much spicier.

     “It’s a shame you’re so averse,” she teases, “I’d cook a few dishes for you. But I can modify the spice levels easily. The ingredients I need are relatively easy to find here.”

     Gojo smiles. “You offering to cook? You do realize that I’ve already been paid, correct?”

     She shakes her head. “I know, but it feels imposing to be shacking up with you and not…contributing in some way. And you mentioned you didn’t cook. I’d hate to subsist on takeout for the duration of the case, even if the food is good.”

     Gojo surmises that being married to Mr. Hayashi was a frugal experience, but he refrains from commenting. Even he knows that bragging about wealth is a gauche and quite frankly, very silly thing to do. He is who he is, but it’s not his wealth that makes him better than everyone else. He could be penniless tomorrow and still be content. Not that he wants to be: the money fucking helps grease all the right palms when he’s working cases, especially abroad.

     “Well, if you insist, then please make a list of everything you need and I’ll send Ijichi after it.”

     Asabé blinks. “You mean the driver? Is he not just a driver?”

     Gojo laughs. “He’s whatever I need him to be. It’s why we pay him, after all. I’m not going to let you go outside and risk being spotted. This penthouse is more secure than an American military base, at least as far as jujutsu is concerned. It’s why you can feel free to unseal yourself anytime without fear. And…of course, you have me.”

     Something about the way he says that makes her pause mid-bite, before she swallows her food and hides her expression in a hasty sip of her drink. She licks her lips as Gojo watches her. He doesn’t wear his blindfold in his home, and she is beginning to understand that the blindfold is likely for his comfort rather than everyone else’s. It must be exhausting, seeing the world the way he does.

     “You know what we forgot?” Gojo says suddenly. “Dessert. Mochi would be clutch right now. Oh! I know, I think there’s some leftover ice cream in the freezer…”

     Asabé watches him, a little mystified. Sometimes she looks at him and sees a man-child, and then moments like before, she sees the Honored One, and a wintry distance in his interstellar gaze that reminds her of carvings of ancient gods and how they view humanity. When he looks over his shoulder and catches her gaze, a popsicle hovering inches from his lips, she sees something else that makes her shiver. She’s not quite sure what it is. Something about his eyes makes her feel too visible.

     Gojo smiles at her, and enjoys his popsicle.

     The first night of security detail goes by like a high school first date. Gojo and his charge elect to watch movies, deciding on something lighthearted and funny. Without realizing it, Asabé finds herself moving closer to Gojo, their mutual laughter bringing them closer together until her knee is pressed against his. Gojo watches her cheeks flush with heat, her pulse racing at the contact.

     It doesn’t take long, but by the third movie, Asabé feels herself drifting, and she leans over. Gojo hesitates at first, but then offers her his shoulder, buffered with one of the pillows. Soon, she’s asleep, and Gojo allows his awareness to expand. For a moment, he is beyond the penthouse, his sight taking him beyond the windows, the skylight, and the warded park.

     There are several curse users within range of his sight, likely doing surveillance. His residence is very secure and he’s since learned how to spot tails. Unlike his beautiful charge, sleeping so peacefully, he has been hunted since birth. One does not survive to become the strongest sorcerer in the modern age by being unable to spot and foil assassins and kidnappers.

     Without a second thought, he sends a warning shot. Just an expansion of his cursed energy. He can see them startle like prey, and he grins. No, he will not hunt them just yet. Let the would-be sharks circle in search of blood. He will enjoy showing them just how far down the food chain they actually are when the time is right. For now, he is secure in the knowledge that they are too afraid to approach now that their prey has found shelter with an apex predator.

     Gojo returns to himself with a slow, controlled exhale. Asabé barely stirs, and he reaches up, runs his fingers over her neck and head. She makes a small moan of pleasure, curling into him. He wants to kiss her throat, right on the spot that beautiful noise comes from. He wants to know what other noises he can elicit from her. Instead, he scoops her into his arms, effortlessly, and carries her to the guest room. She turns her head, burying her face in his chest.

     Gojo stops momentarily, looking down at her. Everything his eyes are telling him says she’s asleep. Is she dreaming of him?

     Asabé breathes deep, smiling.

     “Mm,” she says. “You smell so good.” Her words are slurred, but Gojo smiles anyway. She is dreaming of him.

     Slowly, gently, almost reverent, he lowers her into her bed, tucking her beneath the covers. He stays there a moment, watching as she snuggles into the bed, and he entertains the thought of joining her. He wants to press his lips to her nape, and leave a trail of kisses down her spine until she shivers like a fly-stung horse.

     Fuck.

     Instead, Gojo leans down, brushing his lips along her temple, keeping infinity between her skin and his. She shivers, tucking her head in her shrugged shoulders when his technique tickles her skin.

     Goodnight, beautiful.

Gojo leaves her to sleep, shutting the door behind him. He doesn’t go to his room, requiring little sleep. He thinks of Riko again, of Suguru’s insistence that he rest. He thinks of Fushiguro Toji’s strategy: wearing him down enough to get close and kill him. He has since made sure he never makes such a mistake again. He has since become even more powerful.

     Now…now he reads through the dossier of the case, opting to do actual work. He spots a detail that intrigues him: Asabé’s surname. She allegedly comes from a powerful foreign sorcerer family, and Gojo silently curses the jujutsu community for being so goddamned insular. The more conservative generation of sorcerers have little interest in the study or cataloguing of foreign-born sorcerers. Gojo is still disbelieving that they still cannot accept that there will be more foreign-born sorcerers as curses get stronger and their numbers in Japan continue to dwindle. It is the nature of things. It is one of the reasons why he is reluctant to kill younger curse users if he can convince them to come to Jujutsu Tech instead and nurture their skills and turn them to a good cause.

     He wants to make the same offer to Asabé, and being a citizen via marriage would make it easier to get her accepted into the school. But that won’t work. She’s already beyond high school age. Gojo leans back on the couch, reaching for a Jolly Rancher out of the dish on his coffee table while he works.

     Then, he has an idea.

     In the morning, Gojo orders breakfast, and smiles when Asabé emerges, clad in a pair of pajama pants and an old t-shirt. Even being dressed like this does nothing to diminish how stunning she is. Gojo could see her in a potato sack and still want to know what her lips tastes like after they’re wet with wine. She blinks sleepily and blearily at him.

     “How are you this cheerful this early in the morning?” She asks, her voice husky with recent wakefulness. Gojo points to the coffee pot, and she glances from it to him with a grateful look in her eyes.

     While Asabé makes coffee, Gojo considers his idea before speaking.

     “So,” he begins, and watches as she peers at him over her mug. He laughs to himself. She brought her own coffee mug? He doesn’t cook but man she must think he’s a useless bachelor!

     “So,” he repeats, “I have an idea as to how we can reduce the number of enforcers and the like coming after you. It also may be able to allow you more freedom of movement within Tokyo. I know it sucks being confined to this gorgeous, massive penthouse all day like some princess in a castle, so it occurred to me that we can solve this problem one simple way.”

     Asabé’s brows knit together in consternation. “Alright…what is this idea you have, Gojo?”

     Gojo claps his hands together. “We get married!”

     It’s worth it just to see her sputter, coughing as she tries to process what he’s just said. Married?! Is he insane?

     “What do you mean ‘married’, exactly?” She asks. Gojo’s mouth opens, then closes.

     “I mean married…?” He ventures. “Look, if you’re married to me, the likelihood of curse users coming after you will drop significantly. They’re all scared of me, and they should be because I will absolutely kill them, so it stands to reason that they would never come after my wife.”

     Asabé shakes her head, disbelieving. “Isn’t this a little extreme? Wouldn’t it be just as effective if we simply said we were dating, instead?”

     Gojo shakes his head. “No, because if push came to shove, and I had to sacrifice a girlfriend for the greater good, I wouldn’t hesitate to do so. A wife carries more value, especially for my clan.”

     Asabé tries not to feel chilled by the casual way he says this. First with killing curse users, and then with valuing a wife over a girlfriend. Though, after the chill passes, she can see the cold logic in it. If she is ‘Mrs. Gojo’ the likelihood her father’s enforcers will take her by force will reduce. No one wants to be within the path of Gojo Satoru’s wrath. But marriage?

     “It wouldn’t be a real marriage,” Gojo assures her. “I’m not going to require you to act like my wife or anything. You’ll just be taking my name. That alone should buy you protection and mitigate the annoyance of me having to do pest control with curse users for however long your family wants to send them.”

     Asabé wonders how badly her father wants her back in the clan, likely to be married into another family soon after. He can only drain their expansive coffers so much before he gives up the chase. She wonders whom will outlast whom in this war of attrition. But still…she thinks of Jin, of his body spread across that mountain road, twisted at an unnatural angle, his viscera dark and red and slick amidst the glitter of shattered glass and rent metal.

     She thinks of his face, wide-eyed and slack jawed, his eyes almost accusing her of his death while her body healed and knit itself back together.

     Gojo frowns, seeing her vitals shift before his eyes.

     “Hey,” he says, his voice soft. Asabé doesn’t respond. “Hey, look at me. I’m right here, you’re not in danger.”

     Asabé blinks like a waking dreamer, or a fugitive from a nightmare. She gasps. At some point in her dissociative state, her mug had slipped from her grasp. It floats, suspended in midair, and Gojo peers at her, his expression gentle. An angel, coldblooded and logical, but compassionate too. She reaches for the mug, and once her grasp is sure, Gojo releases his technique. The weight of the mug becomes solid in her grasp once more.

     “Thank you,” she whispers, still mystified at what transpired. Gojo smirks.

     “Told you I was fun to be around,” he says. “So, what do you say: wanna get married and make some curse users shit bricks?”

     Asabé laughs, a sultry, simmering sound that makes Gojo’s scalp tingle.

     “Proposing to a widow after she finishes having a flashback of her dead husband is certainly a choice.”

     Gojo waves his hand. “It’s for a good cause! I’m sure he wouldn’t mind knowing you’re being kept safe.”

     Asabé looks up at him, her expression caught between shock and surprise. Gojo holds her gaze fearlessly. There’s something so guileless about it, and yet she can’t fathom how his mind works for him to say some of the things he does.

     “I suppose it can’t hurt,” she says slowly. “And we can dissolve the marriage once I’ve secured my safety from my family.”

     For some reason the idea of that nettles at Gojo’s pride, but his smile never leaves his face.

     “Exactly,” he says. “So is that a ‘yes’? I’m not buying us matching rings until you say yes.”

     Asabé sips her coffee, peering at him over the rim. “That depends,” she purrs. “You going to bend the knee and ask me properly?”

     Gojo swallows. Oh.

     Even sealed, her voice is rich and velvety, and he wants to actually taste it. He wants to hold her close and drink down that voice as he kisses her until her thoughts are nothing but petals scattered on the wind. He wants to lift her up on one of these quartz countertops, spread her legs, and hear that throaty voice moan his name until the sun sets and Tokyo’s skyline paints her in a smattering of neon.

     Fuck. He turns from her in time to hear the intercom buzz, indicating the food is here. He is also painfully hard thinking about his charge in every position he can successfully put her in. God he bets she looks so fucking good with her knees pushed back, folded in half, her cunt wet and—

     “Gojo?” Her voice calls. “Are you okay? You seem…distracted.”

     Gojo holds up a hand. “Yeah, I’m fine. Just went to bed a bit late last night is all.” He moves toward the door, answering it. The delivery driver attempts curiosity by trying to sneak a peek beyond Gojo, but he finds a pair of cerulean eyes boring into him before handing over the food and retreating back into the elevator without so much as a backward glance.

     Gojo turns, his little ‘inconvenience’ taken care of and breakfast in hand.

     “Let’s eat!”

     Over breakfast, Asabé is quiet. She’s surprised Gojo is so talkative, and most of the time it sounds like conversations he’s having with himself. Well, she would never credit him with being in his right mind. This world they inhabit can make one crazy. It’s one of the reasons she walked away from it.

     “So, tell me about your family,” Gojo says. Asabé frowns.

     “Not much to tell, really,” she says, almost bitterly, and Gojo knows it’s a lie even as the words leave her mouth. “They’re typical affluent sorcerers: think they own everyone and everything. My dad’s the advisor to his uncle, the Emir of Zaria, and they’ve got ties to the House of Saud by marriage.”

     Gojo nods. Sounds like typical sorcerer politics. Not much different than his own family. He wagers being a daughter of such an affluent family comes with its own baggage. He’s been lucky enough that most of the people around him who would hinder him are dead, either through betrayal or someone trying to get to him through them. He wonders how much different things would be if one of his ancestors had been smart enough to Pact their descendants into not trying to kill each other.

     Now he’s the head of a clan that has dwindled in size, boasting mostly members of extended branches with little to no cursed techniques to speak of, trading only on the ancient and indispensable coin of the Gojo name and legacy. His mother lives alone on the ancestral estate, and he barely talks to her, now save for on important festival days or when he wants to make use of the estate’s ancient hot springs.

     He is comforted to know that Asabé’s own relationship with her family is just as strained. At least he is not alone in being alone.

     “So, aside from the inherited technique, what else does your family do?”

     Asabé chews her bagel and washes it down with a slurp of orange juice.

     “Well, the Ruhín clan boasts a large arsenal of cursed tools, and some of them have developed weaker offshoots of the inherited technique, and then there’s our rivals, the Keita clan, whose technique allows them to make animals into servants by imbuing them with the essence of shikigami.”

     Gojo nods. He’s surprised at how much of a culture of sorcerers thrives outside of Japan. He wonders how many students Jujutsu Tech would have if they could approach these new sorcerers before they walked the path of a curse user, or if there is a way to get these insular clans to be more open about sharing their knowledge and sorcerers. Suddenly, his idea for changing jujutsu society from the ground up feels more of a monumental task than it did previously. He still believes it can be done, but Asabé’s existence and circumstances serve to remind him that he must think beyond the borders of his own country if he wants to truly shake the table.

     Ah well, he is the strongest sorcerer of the modern age. Nothing is beyond his ability to accomplish, even if it takes him longer than he would like.

     “Are there a lot of cursed spirits in your homeland?” He asks softly, his tone that of a curious scholar—a teacher seeking to broaden his educational repertoire. He’s only been to Kenya thus far,  but Africa is a huge continent by far, of course there’s bound to be more sorcerers. It’s simple math.

     Asabé nods. “My continent has been through much over the course of human history, with many wrongs that have yet to be redressed. Cursed energy and spirits abound, though our sorcerers lack the stringent organizational hierarchy of Japan’s own. As a result, the ones who fight curses could be technically branded curse users. They only work for pay, and most places where cursed spirits tend to gather aren’t around people who can afford a sorcerer’s exorbitant asking price.”

     Gojo nods. So the problem’s the same, no matter the country. Curse users whoring their skills out for insane fees, which leaves many civilians in the lurch. Sometimes he wishes he could solve the problem of capitalism and the ridiculousness of the jujutsu world at the same damn time. Asabé watches him with a curious expression.

     “Would you want to become an official sorcerer?” He asks suddenly. “You have a rare and powerful gift, and to be quite honest we could really use the help. I feel like hiding is such a waste of your talents.”

     Asabé smiles grimly. “I know what you’re trying to do, Gojo, and while I appreciate the praise, I also know it comes with the expectation of a foreshortened lifespan. I don’t want to sign up for this just to find myself in an early grave because some curse user or spirit got the drop on me.”

     “They’d never harm you as long as I’m there. I’d kill them before I let anything happen to you.” Gojo says before he realizes what he’s saying. His voice is fierce, a growl underpinning his tone, his eyes hardening like gems in a look of fearsome and possessive determination. Asabé gasps, and he can see the capillaries in her face open up, sending a rush of crimson heat to her cheeks. She puts her gaze in her coffee mug.

     “That’s…” she tries to find words. “That’s very reassuring, Gojo. Thank you.”

     Gojo grins. “So in order for our fake marriage to work, you’re gonna have to drop the formalities with me.”

     Asabé blinks several times. “Excuse me?”

     Gojo leans back in his chair, still grinning. “You heard me: you have to say my name.”

     “Gojo?”

     “Try again, Asabé.” The way he says her name makes her shiver. It’s a name from her homeland, of course, but the vowel pronunciations of Hausa and Japanese are similar enough that he puts the inflections on it perfectly. Not only that, but his voice drops an octave when he says it, and she tries to ignore the warmth rushing through her veins, dripping to pool between her thighs. Has it really been so long that just him saying her name is enough to turn her on? And the way he’s looking at her, it’s as if he knows what he’s doing to her!

     “I suppose you’re right,” she says slowly, hesitant to say his name for fear of how it will sound when shaped by her lips, while an ember of what she now knows to be desire struggles to become a flame in her belly.

     “Satoru.” She says simply, so softly the vented air almost steals it away. Gojo watches the way her lips part around his name, the way they shape the syllables, the breathy little sigh that accompanies it. The way her eyes seem to soften as she realizes saying his name isn’t so bad.

     He wants to hear it again and again. He wants it as a refrain in his ear while he buries his face in her neck and does his best to leave his mark on her skin. He wants to unshackle her voice and hear her sing for him, only for him.

     Asabé is silent, as if there is precious little else of import to say after his name. Instead, they gaze at one another, realizing that despite their scheme, some threshold has now been crossed. The tension warbles a bit longer before the trilling and vibrating of Gojo’s phone interrupts them. He answers, reluctant to tear his eyes off the woman who is practically smoldering across from him. He watches her while he takes the call, listening intently, eyes focused.

     Asabé realizes what that feeling is when he looks at her. She feels naked.

     “Uh huh,” Gojo is saying while she’s imagining things that no woman should be imagining about this man. “Alright. Got it.”

     He hangs up, and she can practically feel his divided attention coming together to focus on her in full again, even though his gaze never left hers the entire call. Her gaze drops to his mouth. God, what a beautiful mouth he has, and she can tell it’s soft, probably smooth and sweet like the candy he likes to eat.

     “Asabé,” he says her name in a sing-song voice. “You’re staring at me like you want to eat me.”

     Asabé blinks again, startled. Of course she hadn’t been discreet about her…admiration.

     “It’s your eyes,” she says by way of excuse. “I cannot help it. I have never seen anything like them before.”

     Gojo smirks, wondering why a compliment he’s heard innumerable times over the course of his life makes his stomach go into knots when she’s giving it to him. Asabé gets up from her seat, coming around to him. He looks up at her, smiling, cerulean eyes bright and alert and expectant.

     “If I’m to be your wife I suppose that we should be comfortable with a level of intimacy that makes our union convincing.” She reaches down, tentatively brushing a few locks of silver-white hair from his face. He never takes his eyes off of her, even as her curious fingertips linger on his temple, trailing down his cheek, watching a spot of color bloom there.

     “You’re not wearing your infinity,” she whispers, her fingertips coming to linger on his lips. Gojo’s mouth smiles under her touch.

     “For my wife?” He muses, his breath warm and moist on her skin. “I don’t need to.”

     He kisses her fingertips, watches her eyes widen a little as his lips trail lower, planting a kiss in her palm. Asabé shivers, then cups his face in that same hand. Gojo leans into it.

     “Looks like we’re getting the hang of it already,” he says, looking at her with a knowing smirk. She laughs, that sultry and simmering sound that he’s growing to love.

     “And so we are,” she says, those honey eyes twinkling. “Satoru.”

     Gojo swallows. This woman’s voice is powerful even with the seal because why does his name sound so fucking good coming from her lips? He wonders what she will sound like moaning it in hsi ear. He wants to hear her scream it while she begs him to—

     “We should go out,” he says, willing those not-so-wholesome thoughts to the back of his mind. Asabé raises a brow. “A public appearance of us together is necessary to make the ruse convincing. Don’t worry, no one will dare harm you while you’re by my side.”

     Asabé takes her hand away and Gojo wonders why that bothers him. He wants her to keep touching him. God he wants her to kiss him. That beautiful mouth of hers is made to be kissed until—

     “That’s a good idea,” she says. “Where shall we go?”

     Gojo grins. “Well, I wouldn’t be a good husband if I didn’t take my gorgeous wife shopping, now would I?”

     Asabé feels as if she has underestimated just how wealthy Gojo is because when their car pulls up to a shopping center that exclusively houses major designers, she wonders if maybe they should have gone with more conservative shopping options.

     That’s the old you, she thinks bitterly. Jin is dead, and Satoru is from one of the oldest and wealthiest families in the country. Accept it. Aside, you deserve nice things! Indulge.

Thus, her inner voice reasons.

     The amount of money Gojo is willing to spend seems, for lack of a better term, limitless. When she picks out a Versace bag? The Centurion card comes out, heavy and tapered and casual. The attendant ringing them up tries not to look shocked, more so at how beautiful they look together rather than at the fact that Gojo is casually spending money on items that cost more than most people’s rent.

     And throughout the shopping spree, Gojo is indulgent, leaning into the affection of their sham relationship with a relish that almost convinces Asabé it is not entirely feigned.

     He holds her hand while they walk through the busy mall, keeping her close. At one point, he leans in, presses a kiss to the top of her head, and she glances up at him with surprise, before smiling shyly as he winks at her from above the rim of his glasses.

     When they slide into Balmain, she models clothes for him: racy dresses that cling to her curves like a glorious art deco skin. Gojo sits in a chair, sipping offered champagne, legs spread as he watches his “wife” emerge from the dressing room to model clothes for him.

     “How about this one?” She asks, turning on the balls of her feet in the triptych mirror. Gojo’s lips are wet with champagne, and he sets it down. He doesn’t drink usually, and if he does decide to, he prefers a sweet dessert wine to anything else. This champagne is dry, possibly burned, as if it has been frozen rather than kept on ice. He does not pick it up again.

     “Why not get them all?” He asks casually. “You look good in everything, my dear. And even better in nothing.”

     Asabé feels her pulse leap at the words, and for a moment it’s as if everything around them is obsolete. She studies Gojo momentarily, who watches her with a bright and amused focus that makes her shift, squeezing her thighs together. Then, his tongue snakes out, tracing his beautiful lips, still moist with champagne. With one large, strong hand, he beckons her to come to him and Asabé can’t help it. Her steps go to him, faltering at first, before she remembers she is supposed to be his wife. She comes to stand between his spread legs.

     “You look incredible,” Gojo says, and she wonders if this is part of the ruse or if he means it. His hand comes forward, and he gives her a questioning look. She nods. His hand comes to rest on her calf, before slowly moving upward, tracing one of those long legs until her just barely begins to lift the hem of her dress.

     “I can’t wait to get home and peel this off of you,” he murmurs, shocking not only Asabé but the attendant coming up behind him, who startles at walking in on what is undoubtedly an intimate moment between them. In a sudden boldness, Asabé leans over until her face hovers a mere breath from Gojo’s own.

     “If you behave yourself,” she whispers, husky and sultry, “I’ll let you do anything you like tonight.”

     “Anything?” Gojo’s eyes are bright with anticipation. Asabé can see the attendant trembling as they discreetly attempt to collect the champagne glass.

     “Anything.”

     The rest of their day is spent walking around Tokyo. Gojo never lets go of her hand, and sometimes he even brings it up to his lips to kiss her knuckles. Whoever must be watching cannot be convinced that their relationship is genuine, and even Asabé forgets that this is a ruse sometimes. The way he speaks, the way he holds her close, the way he looks at her, all of it feels so real she momentarily forgets her heartache and fear.

     Gojo takes Asabé to a bridge overlooking a pond in a park. The sun will be setting soon, and he wants to see her eyes match the sunset.

     “You know,” he says, leaning against the railing. “For a fake marriage this was actually a lovely first date.”

     “Yeah…” Asabé says a little dreamily. “If this were real I’d definitely call you back for a second date.”

     “Only because I spent the equivalent of two homes on you today.” Gojo teases and she nudges him playfully, scoffing when he turns on his infinity to evade her.

     “It’s more than that, Satoru,” strange how she’s gotten used to saying his name after only a day. “You are good company. The money helps, and anyone would be happy to be spoiled by you.”

     Gojo turns to her, reaching up to cup her face in his hand, tracing an unhurried thumb along the sleek curve of her cheekbone, tender and almost genuine.

     “Yeah, but you’re not just anyone, Asabé,” he says. “You’re my wife.”

     And then he leans down and kisses her.

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[wjforever]

LBFAD. Episode 1. Part 1

Well, I want to talk about each episode separately while I'm rewatching the series.

As I said, I initially didn't have high expectations, but there was a certain interest. So I started watching this drama with curiosity.

The beginning intrigued me. An interesting epic legend from the first seconds beautiful views further. This is what attracted me back when I saw it on Tumblr.

Yes, it may seem too much to someone. But this is a heavenly world. It seems to me that often, on the contrary, movies lack this fabulousness. Heaven doesn't feel like heaven. But here everything looks really immortal, huh. I like it, really.

But then I felt a little disappointment. Me, a person unfamiliar with this genre at all, suddenly began to be bombarded with a bunch of some names, characters, stories, legends. There are so many characters, and each one is introduced one by one. I always have a hard time delving into a story, this is my eternal problem, and when there are so many difficult names at once… But I, knowing this peculiarity of mine, honestly tried to understand what was going on. What are these books of fate and what is this Arbiter Hall. At least it remained beautiful.

Surely the translation to get me messed up here as well. Many names and terms are simply not translated and because of this, the whole or part of the meaning is lost. I will write about this later.

By the way, it was unclear to me why books constantly need to be repaired, can't they be of better quality, and is the tree enough for all creatures? Haha. But these are trifles, of course.

So, beauty alone was not enough for me, so I quickly got bored. The heroine, although I was ready for her personality, seemed to me boring and too sweet and naive. But it wasn't her character or voice that made me tired, like some others. I was really mentally ready for her, lol. I was tired of the long introduction on behalf of Xiao Lanhua, and the appearance of a colorless, boring and slightly arrogant ideal ChangHeng and the same flat Emperor didn't make the situation better. Although the views were still beautiful and pleasing to the eye)

I also didn't like Orchid's friends-plants. Later I realized why they have neither personality nor charisma. That was the goal, they were just a brief part in the series, but I didn't know about it yet, ha ha) When I watched it again, it didn't feel the same.

As for the Master, I confess honestly, initially I expected something else from her. I thought that, judging by the description of XLH and her behavior, she would turn out to be evil towards Lanhua, a kind of stepmother. She drinks, pours wine on the orchid, smirks maliciously. Well, what else can you expect? But in the future, she surprised me.

Dongfang Qingcang at first appears quite briefly. And his white eyeliner and white hair only made me smirk. Truly, in the drama everyone has a pretty hard makeup and this doesn't bother me. But being incarcerated in full readiness, dude, I like you already. But I continued to wait obediently.

However, instead of more about our bad guy, we got the good one again. Xiao Lanhua goes to ChangHeng. Behaves stupidly, the scene seems comical, but rather banal. Although I was amused that ChangHeng didn't help her out and didn't even try, the damn hero lol. When I watched this again, his reaction, of course, was better understood. At first he's shocked to see her. Then he thinks that she is just a fan of his exploits like everyone else, and later worries if she remembers too much.

Both ChangHeng and Xiao Lanhua with their enthusiasm are a little too much. Her innocent eyes seemed too affected. He seemed distant, arrogant, and not so smart for the good guy. After her phrase, "you saved me" and his answer "so what", even I was confused. Poor Orchid, haha. This man is so...

In general, I wasn't impressed by their first meeting. Although I smiled a little. It wasn't annoying because it's a fairy tale after all, but it was boring. This word runs a red line through the entire first episode. Boring.

As for the spiritual stone I didn't understand anything about its significance, because I didn't know what value such things have in this universe. But her reaction to the request to throw it out is of course so stupid and naive. "Throw it away", "Oh he gave it to me"))

By the way, the scene before that was very beautiful, when Xiao Lanhua among the petals of flowers. One of the few reasons why the first episode wasn't a complete failure for me. But at the same time, this terrible "smoking" magical transparent plastic around ChangHeng's head and body quickly sobered me, lol. Even though it seems kind of beautiful, it looks cheap and impractical as for military protection.

After this XLH signs up for the exam. And though this moment, of course, showed her character, it wasn't impressed at all. Banality. I'm such a poor little downtrodden girl who's been bullied for 500 years, but I'm showing you my teeth.

One more scene with plant friends didn't contribute in any way to the development of the plot or the dynamism of the first episode. We got a few chats with friends and admiration for ChangHeng, some bullying scenes. As Dongfang said much later, ChangHeng again, can you talk about something other than him? For 40 minutes, this is not enough to draw attention to the series, which has only 36 episodes. I really started to be afraid that it would be a drag, where they would sit in two scenery. Thank God it turned out to be completely wrong.

By the way, after the second conversation with friends, I was wondering where they got the money/stones from, and whether they could leave the house, because they seem to be aware of a lot. Or do they know this only from the words of XLH?

Some action begins only at the very end. Xiao Lanhua find out that ChangHeng's fate has changed for some reason and he is in danger. I wondered if Lanhua always feels that someone's fate has changed and whether she should keep track of it. Why should she know about it at all, if oversees of fate can't and shouldn't influence anything. And do destinies change so rarely that she doesn't get a signal all the time? But the reasons for the change in the fate of ChangHeng, as well as other issues, were not explained until the end of the series. I have some theory, though, you can read it here.

Part 2

My blog on Buy me a coffee

[kuro-ttsuki]

Nine | Enemies

Dean’s POV:

I sat back in the locker room, watching Randy and Sethy boy bicker back and forth like a god damn sitcom. This reminded me of that one Spanish telenovela that is so damn dramatic. Let’s just replace the women with these two men and you’d probably have to end up walking into a mental institution yourself at the rate they were arguing. The argument seemed to land on the new girl for some reason.

It was her first day and yet she was the talk of the town around here, everyone hated her ass. Especially my good brother Roman, who really didn't appreciate that low blow she gave him but I for one, fucking enjoyed it. Guess, he couldn’t digest losing to a girl after all.

I didn't really understand what the big deal was, to me, she wasn't all that special. But sooner rather than later, she's going to be just another locker room slut, passed down to everyone before quitting. But that's just me, I guess.

Soon, Randy and Seth's petty bickering turned into a full blown argument, and even I enjoyed chaos and the back stage fights, I rather not be here when the police shows up and start arresting the most guilty looking, which is somehow also me so I decided to leave.

While leaving Roman to tend to the screaming children to deal with them, I smirked to myself at the peace and quiet in the hallway. Usually, it'll be filled with little crew members and superstars leaving and going places but I guess, everyone decided to leave early.

As I was walking down the halls, the sight of the new girl and CM Punk standing by the catering area caught my eye. Now usually, I'm not a nosey type but to see the two so touchy touchy and having a hushed argument with each other not only intrigued my curiosity but it proves my statement earlier. Who knew out of every superstar, she fucks a previous drug addict.

Why not a dip shit like.... I don't know Dolph Ziggler?

...wink...

I leaned against the wall, paying close attention on how the two reacted to each other. Even though I couldn't hear much, I heard enough. More than enough to completely understand the dynamics of whatever the hell this was truly about.

"Can you stop treating me like some fucking orphan child in need of your help, Phil? I know what I'm doing and frankly what I did caused us a win. It's not my fault you wanted to be a overbearing ass and John wanted to be a greedy bastard. And I thought I was egotistical." She spoke with sarcasm in her voice that came off bitter sweet.

I can definitely tell ol’ Phil boy was hurt. This girl definitely got some balls to her, which makes her dangerous to Randy and a pain in the ass for me and the boys. But ...Phil could be a weakness to her.

I watched as instead of Phil firing back with insults and the same bass in his tone she used on him, he replied with gentle touches and a soft spoken voice which made her calm down easily. It was honestly aggravating to watch. I don't understand it, shit I don't even like it.

How does she know him? How is she the talk for everyone, how is she the "biggest thing to happen in WWE" and most importantly why does it have to be a bitch like her? Couldn’t it have been another girl? For all I knew, I couldn’t stand her. But, it was weird. Why did I still want her even though I couldn’t tolerate the pure existence of her?

Maybe I will never understood, shit, I can't even understand my feelings for the girl. I mean I dislike her, I know that for sure but in the ring, I felt something. Something a taken gut ain't supposed to feel. This feels so wrong but at the same time, it felt right to be thinking about her. How could I hate her when she’s been dominating my thoughts ever since she won the match?

She has this fire to her that's... attractive I guess, but everything else? I can't stand. She makes me wanna strangle her pretty lil neck. She's more annoying than the rookie diva like Sasha Banks or whatever her name is.

Anyways, the conversation seemed to continue and I was about to leave because the whole interaction between them made me want to throw up but once I heard my name. I decided to stay for a little bit. Maybe it was getting interesting. Just a tad bit.

"I'm sorry if I made you feel that way, it's just after Dean hit you, I wanted nothing more than to protect you out there. The shield are a brutal group, especially that lunatic Dean. I see how dirty they play and it's not good. I don't know what I'll do, if you got really hurt out there."

I watched as he tried to make a move on the poor shameless doll but she was hesitant. She was clearly falling for the "worried hero CM Punk vibe" but yet she wasn't in his arms like most girls will be. I don't know why, but I was proud of the girl.

Maybe she ain't a wannabe slut after all. Eventually the conversation bored me, so I decided to leave. It eventually died down and I didn’t see myself staying for longer. I don't know how long I was walking but it felt like a fucking eternity. As I walked further down the dim lit hallway, I spotted my girlfriend talking to the Bella twins.

Bre noticed me at first but chose not to say anything, instead she continued to listen into whatever conversation they were having as I sneaked up behind Renee.

"Yeah, and that girl was brutal in the ring. Can you believe she's Chyna's niece? Like THE Chyna? She looks nothing like her and isn't Chyna like, white?" Nikki asked ever so seriously, with a smile on her face like she did something with that dumbass remark. I mentally face palmed myself on how fucking stupid she sounded.

I swear all that plastic in her breast went to her damn head. Out of all the girls here, why is Renee’s friends with them?

"That sounds a bit racist, Nikki. Just because the aunt is white doesn't mean the father could be. Like Yovanna is clearly mixed. Like how you guys are but you guys have a lighter complexion and she's more tan." Once again, I mentally face palmed myself at Renee's comeback. I get she's trying to help but she sounded just as stupid and racist. And to think I had this exact conversation with Seth earlier. And even that sounded dumber than these girls combined.

People are so worried about the girl's race and background instead of her skills. If I was her, I would be foaming. As I see it, she could beat every superstar and diva in NXT. Maybe not here, but definitely NXT where all the rookies are at.

Not wanting to risk losing anymore braincells with this conversation, I decided to end this shit show myself. "Well hello ladies." I said, wrapping an arm around Renee's neck which startled her but she replied with a kiss to my arm. God she's cute.

"So what y'all ladies talking about?" I asked, acting like I wasn't just standing here, torturing myself while listening in. I just wanted to see if they would lie or not.

"We were actually talking about the new girl. She was on fire out there, it's not everyday you see a diva kick a guy's ass in the ring. It's like attitude area all over again."

Bullshit, if this was a cartoon, your pants would be on fire or some dumb shit. They were making up lies which clearly showed through everything right now.

"We were thinking that having her would put the women's division on top." Renee lied her pretty little ass off, I may be a little stupid but I'm sure damn ain't blind. Stevie Wonder could see that these chicks did not like the new girl one bit.

"That and how she treated my man out there, she was being greedy out there. She barely let anyone get tagged in and won with a cheap shot." Nikki commented as both Renee and Bre shamelessly nodded in agreement. I just shrugged it off, daring not to say anything.

Did I agree with her statement? No. From someone who's been in this gig for so long, as I see it, her teammates were only there to make sure the poor little girl wasn't embarrassed on her first day. Did she really need them out there? Against Randy, no. But against us? Most definitely.

"Speaking of the new girl, here she is now with my boyfriend and...the Irish dude." We all looked towards the direction Nikki was pointing at, the trio was walking towards us, but this time she looked all lovely dovey with Sheamus with how close they were. Maybe I was wrong after all about her.

I watched as Nikki called the three over, immediately, like a dog on a leash, John went to her side. But Sheamus and Vonna seemed hesitant, not that I would blame that. Nikki may be a dumb, selfish bimbo but the girl was very damn intimidating. "Don't be shy, I don't bite." She said in that fake nice girl tone.

I watched as Yovanna walked towards us but stayed by Sheamus. A small part of me hope she didn't notice me with Renee and the other part kind of wanted her to. But she did and as she did, it wasn't a glance but a stare. It was like she was studying me, putting two and two together about me and Renee. And from what I saw, it felt like she didn't really approve of my relationship.

Renee then moved herself from my grip and instead wrapped her arms around myself, I copied her actions, giving her a quick kiss on the head as I watched Yovanna purposely ignoring my presence.

"So, Yovanna is it? Can I call you Anna?"

She didn't even give her a chance to answer, she just continued to flap those big lips of hers.

"I'm sure you already met the guys but I'm Nikki, that's my sister Bre and that's Renee, Dean's girlfriend. And just to give you a heads up, John here is my man. And Daniel is Bre's."

"No need to inform me who's taken, I'm not really looking for a intimate relationship with my coworkers." Vonna, said in a low tone. Her eyes going to mine when she said the last part.

Nikki scoffed in reply before getting all up and personal with Yovanna, which was a bad idea from the start. But who am I to know. I watched Yovanna's face remained nothing but emotionless as she let Nikki get in her face.

"Well it seemed like you were already too comfortable with my boyfriend. Rookie mistake, I know. I'm just being nice here and just giving you a warning. You don't wanna be known as the slut on your first week do you?" Nikki had this tone in her voice that only mean girls used to bully scared little girls. But yet again Yovanna reframed herself from slapping the fuck out of Nikki, I know I would.

She didn't seem irritated or scared or anything. Instead, she wore a smile and I don't know why but it irritated me and not just me but Nikki too. What does she have to be happy about? Why is she letting Nikki dog her out but she wanted to scratch out both Phil's and John's eyes for trying to take her spotlight. I don't get it.

"Look, I'm not here to play mean girls with you. This is workplace, not highschool. And I guess thanks for the advice but if you didn't hear me before I said I'm not looking for a relationship with my coworkers." She stated coldy but yet that smile stayed.

You could tell it bothered the twins, as Yovanna was about to leave, Nikki reached over to grab her which was a wrong move again. Why? Because before a finger even touch her shoulder, Yovanna gripped her arm and twisted it behind Nikki's back, having her screaming like a banshee for a good minute before leaving.

I had to hide my enjoyment from that, I mean even though I don't technically like the girl. What she did to Nikki was bad ass.

Yovanna's Pov:

I turned my back on the girls and left with Sheamus following, once we turned the corner that's when my mood switched. I don't want to panic because I never panic but did I just dig my own grave with that attack? I mean, it's her fault for trying to put her hands on me, if we're not in the ring don't touch me or I'll take that as a personal attack. Fuckin common sense!

But now I think I lost a ally. I know John barely liked me because of my ring attitude but now he definitely doesn't like me.

Should I apologize and beg for their forgiveness or just pray that they don't use Phil like a practice dummy to hurt me. Even though I cared for Phil deeply, I was kinda leaning on the second option. I'm not one to break my pride and get on my knees for nobody, and I won't start now. I just gotta pray those slimy bastards don't hurt him.

And can you believe the nerve of those bitches to get in my face and disrespect me? Like if I didn't care for my career, all of them would be in body bags right now. I know they're veterans but none of them had the right to threaten me or make me feel uncomfortable in my own skin all because that disfigured barbie felt threatened towards me like haven't you heard to blame the boyfriend and not the girl?

Apparently not since she has his dick so far down her throat to even listen or maybe it's the plastic from her boobs traveling up to her head, destroying brain cells as we speak. Whatever it is, it didn't have to go as far as it went. Now I got the authority, randy, the shield, the barbies, and G.I Joe to worry about.

Way to fucking go, Yovanna. You just made several enemies on your first day on the job, what fun. And I mean that in the most sarcastic way possible.

It's already bad enough Phil is basically my babysitter, and I got more enemies than friends but now the only true friend I have is no where to be found meanwhile the other one just stood there and let me dig my own grave. What a great friend you are Shaemus, again, I meant that in a sarcastic way.

He wasn't a great friend, in fact the the worst friend ever to be made in the planet. Like who stands there and watch their friend defend themselves against three people?! That's right! No one! Ever!

If the roles were reversed I would of shut the entire situation down with a few punches to the throat but not Shaemus! Instead he stood and watched and laugh, like it was a movie for him! Just wait till Phil hear about this.

Oh.

Oh my god, Phil is going to kill me once he hears about this.

How should I tell him? I could do it fast like ripping off a band aid or I can do it calm and pretend like I don't care, or I could just not tell him. Yeah, I like that option better, I won't tell him.

"You know we're going to have to tell Phil, Right?" Shaemus said, looking down at me as we walked through the halls. How the fuck did he know?! Did he just read my mind or does he want to see Phil kill me? Probably both, it's already too late to try to change Shaemus' mind anyway, we were already at Phil's Locker room.

I was the one to open the door, but definitely not the one to tell Phil shit, that was Shaemus' job.

As I peeked through the creak I made, I was greeted with Phil's shirtless presence, staring right back at me from the couch. "Vonna, what a surprise. What do I owe the pleasure?" He said with that good citizen smile, I replied back with a smile of my own as I removed myself from the door. "I'm not only though." I said as I made my way to the couch in a skipping form, Shaemus followed behind.

"Oh Shaemus, what a su-"

"I don't wanna hear it ya cheater." Shaemus cut Phil off by placing his finger directly in Phil's face as he wore a hurt expression on his face like he just caught his lover in bed with someone else. At this moment I couldn't tell if Shaemus was joking or him and phil had a secret relationship I didn't know about. Either way, it was hilarious for my end.

"Anyway, we have something to tell you." Shaemus said, his eyes on me as I slide further in the couch as if I could make my escape, although it was impossible but the subtle change of the environment when all eyes were on me, made me want to hide in my own skin.

Phil didn't even bother speaking, he just stared at me. His eyes burning into my skin as the room remain silent.

I did my best to not crack under the pressure but it was killing me so I spilled my guts. "FINE! I fucked up okay? I ended up making more people hate me with my big mouth but it wasn't my fault, alright!? I wasn't looking for a fight but this barbie like bitch called me over just to threaten and insult me so I retaliate. She touched me so I went into defense mode and almost broke her arm but again, her fault not mine, but I think John is now a enemy since I roughed up his girlfriend..." I confessed with my hands over my eyes, peeking between my finger like an child to see Phil's reaction. He held no emotion, there was no anger, no sadness, nothing. I honestly thought I was in the clear until:

"Could of been worse if you insulted Renee Young. That's Dean's girlfriend and the WWE's favorite journalist here. She friends with the whole Diva's locker room. If you insult her, you insulted them. But then again you insulted Nikki so half of the diva's locker room dislikes you.” He stated with no emotion in his tone nor face. I wasn't sure if he was disappointed or pissed, I couldn't tell.

Maybe it would've been better if he reacted, at least that'll put me at ease instead of whatever this is. I tried to look at Sheamus for a comfort and a solution but he just replied with a shrug. I was officially doomed with no solutions to my problems, way to go Yovanna. You broke Phil and now made everyone hate you on your first day.

"I could speak to her if you want to clear all this up. That's if you don't mind having all the girls here hate you." Phil spoke, this time his eyes were on mine.

I didn't really care if everyone hated me though, at least that's what I thought. I guess it's best to have more friends than enemies here, but I rather be their enemy than friend and kiss their ass.

"It's fine Phil, I can deal with it. Just stay on guard, I don't want the shield to hurt you because of my big mouth."

Phil's eyes searched mines before nodding in reply. I honestly didn't know what he was nodding for but I decided not to push forward.

Has anyone seen Eva?" I asked the boys only to get complete silence as an answer before Sheamus decided to grace me with his sweet voice. "I forgot to tell ya, she left a hour ago with a special British Diva. The last

time I saw them, they were sucking each other's faces."

I mentally cringed at the last part, Eva got a one night stand with a diva meanwhile I just made half of my coworkers want to kill me. What an awesome Monday?

[brooklynislandgirl]

11, 20 for the shipping meme

Something Just Like This || Accepting

how long does your muse have to know someone before they decide to ask them out?

I cannot really answer this question and do it justice because quite honestly? I do not think Beth has ever actually asked anyone out on a romantic date in all of her life.She was very sheltered in her upbringing, was given a nightmarish description about what sex and romance was about, and most of the time she's been given a 'proper' escort to many society and charity or political function though the Admiral or has attended these things with her brother. Adding to all of this is her inherent demisexuality and more importantly what is known as quoiromantic nature; she doesn't feel primary sexual attraction to really anyone, and only secondary attraction once she's established a deep emotional connection to the person. Her romantic attraction is wibbly-wobbly in the sense that for her, there are no real distinctions between romantic or platonic forms of love. Which one can understand can be awkward AF. There are several ships on this blog that have taken literal years to form, and I do mean real time, not story wise. Some have been very one-sided because while Beth might feel something, she will never really force herself onto someone else, if she even tells them at all. She also very firmly believes that if she ever uses the L word, then she's pretty much beginning a count down to when the other person will leave her. I think if the date was very upfront and platonic ~coffee with a friend, movie with a relative, some sort of event with a co-worker~ it's a lot easier for her not to get wound up in her deep-rooted insecurities and paranoia. She will more often than not insist on paying for whatever the date it, and likely her favourite things to do with someone else are dancing and surfing. Beth is very sweet, unquestionably loyal, and does her best to appear as bright, friendly, and soft as possible. She is exceptionally agreeable even if it ends up costing her time, energy, or mental/physical well-being. But it might take months or even years for her to realise she wants to date someone, and by then, the person ~if they were interested at all~ have moved on.

~*~

20. what would push you to drop a ship?

Oh geeze. I mean, I'd like to think I am pretty easy going as long as there's mutual respect happening between the other mun and myself. Notice, I say mun…because I don't mind writing toxic or questionable situations. Life happens, not every person you meet is a good one, at least for you, etc. But the bond between muns has to have solid foundations first and foremost before I will consider a ship much less attempt to write one out. Beth is a weird little bunny, after all. Things that could come up though is…

I. Writing nothing BUT nsfw material.

Look, like everyone else, naughty-times can be quite fun. Especially when you and your mutual have a good flow between them. But at the same time, if all I wanted to do was write 'smut', I could do fan-fiction and only have to worry about what makes me happy. I want slice of life! I want conflict and drama! I want serious moments and silly ones! She is a witch after all and in most verses, a nurse. There's life and death happening and she needs to be a part of it.

II. Using her to come at Riley.

Is Beth my gate-keeper for her technically canon sibling? Yes, yes she is. I have spent 8 years or so trying my best to flesh her out as a character, to give her a well-rounded back story, to make her the best character that I can. And in those years, I have been told by at least one person that "Your writing style and mine just aren't compatible" only for that same mun, a couple months down the line to find Riley and praise my writing, my character development and growth. All because he is a pretty man with a big….ego. And they were absolutely shocked when I pointed out that I. Am. The. Same. Mun. And the writing is the same except for the FC and the Pronouns. Now, I get it. Beth is an OC and a lot of people have had bad experiences with them. Not a lot of people want to write with one. Not a lot of people are interested in the amount of work I've put into her, want to ask questions, want to learn her as she and I are learning their interpretation of someone ELSE's OC…oops, I mean canon character. But that's no excuse to treat her like a joke just because her brother is more interesting, more…masculine…and more likely to crush every last feeling you or your muse ever had. Really, those are the two things I'm not willing to at least discuss.

[coolgirl32]

What are Jacqulyn's thoughts on everyone else

Everybody knows the drill, no reposting, copywriting or translating without my full permission and do not forget to like and follow and also do not forget to request what you want me to write next on any other fanfic or any other cartoon that you like so let's get on with the post.

Zeus: when she first met her husband she thought he was a bit weird but a little bit attractive, now her thoughts of him are that he's still a little bit weird very handsome but could always need to control his temper a bit more and always thinks of him as a lightning bolt.

Hades: when she first met him it was very awkward for both of them she thought of him as scary but the more she got to know him the more she realized he was an actually sweet guy, now she thinks of him as her big brother the brother she never had and a very sweet guy that just doesn't want to rule the underworld but luckily he's not alone to rule the underworld he has his two brothers.

Poseidon: when she first met him she thought of him as a jerk but when she got to know him better she soon realized that he was just nervous around her and didn't know how to react so they became friends and now she thinks of him as a weird friend that always makes you smile but is the one who's serious.

Hera: when she first met her she thought of Hera as a very beautiful woman who is like a peacock a very pretty peacock.

Hestia: when she first met her she thought she was the sweetest woman in the world who can also cook and help her with cooking and also give her out some good cooking tips too now she still thinks Hestia is the sweetest woman in the world and a good cook as well.

Aphrodite: she she thought Aphrodite was very pretty but she also had a bad feeling about Aphrodite when she found out that aphrodite cheated on Hephaestus she got really upset now she thinks Aphrodite is a sleazy bimbo who's manipulative who will do anything to get what she wants.

Hephaestus: when Hephaestus was born she thought he was the cutest baby in the world to everybody he wasn't but to her that mother instinct kicked in immediately she loves and supports her sons and daughters no matter what she is his inspiration not only on living but also inventing.

Aries: when he was born his mother's thoughts were that he was the most cutest baby in the world and that there is hope she loves all her sons and her other thoughts were that he was going to be a good kid and a great warrior she loves all her children even the ones who are not her biological kids but she treats them all as her kids.

Apollo+Artemis: when she met them for the first time they were just born out of their mother's womb her thoughts on them were that these kids are going to do something great that they are just children and that they are the most cutest things in the world and that whatever they need and whatever their mother needs she'll make sure it happens if it's food then it'll be done if it's shelter then it'll be done if it's anything then it'll be done.

Electra+heron&serphim: her thoughts on them would be that they're okay and they're not so bad they're just trying to live how they live and she hopes the best for them she never judged them because she has been in electra's sandals she understands the pain where Electra came from she felt so bad for the poor woman that she actually helped her and made sure that seraphim and heron would be raised together by their mom.

Well I hope you all enjoy this sorry if it took too long

[shankss-magnificent-ass]

you don't understand how much i love what you do with shanks and the red hair pirates i find it hilarious 😂❤️ and i would like to ask you a bit like what you did with: imagine taking advantage of the fact that most of the red haired pirates have never lived with a woman before, but with the reader who has false eyelashes, i would like to see that please that would make my day ❤️

Tank you love ❤️

Imagine taking advantage of the fact that most of the red haired pirates have never lived with a woman part 3

Author's note: sorry it took so long to get this out ... Uh here's a cookie 🍪

Out at a club

You: *sitting at the bar between Shanks and Benn in a tiny cocktail dress and heels all done up while drinking the fruitiest bitch drink on the menu*

Shanks: *man spreading next to you, eyeing you up like he wanted to eat you* how's your drink, love?

You: *smiles up at him* it's good, needs a little more vodka though.

Benn: *pulls you into his side and squeezes your hip* we can always order you another.

Shanks: *watches your lips locked around the straw and shudders* we'll buy yo as many as you want.

You: *finishes your drink* okay, let me go to the bathroom first.

On your way back

Strange man: oh where you going sweet cheeks? You need some company for the night?

You: I'm good, thanks

Strange man: *pulls you into his chest and grabs your wrist in a tight grip* now don't be that way, I am just being friendly.

You: *yelps when he gives you a sharp shake*

Shanks: *grabs the man's shoulder* hey, you should let her go buddy, she doesn't like that.

Strange man: hey man, fuck off *pushes you in a chair and shoves Shanks* she's fine, she made bedroom eyes at me

Shanks: *laughs it off* trust me when I say those are just how her eyes look

You: you know what? *gets back up and punches the man in the head* I'm not fine!

Strange man: *flinches away from you* fucking psycho bitch. *Storms off*

Benn: you're as protective of the captain as ever

You: would you please stand up for yourself?

Shanks: *now ticked off* I stand up for myself when you and your bedroom eyes and their shapeshifting eyelashes stop attracting these drooling jack asses.

You: I can't help that! And what the fuck do you mean shapeshifting eyelashes?

Shanks: anytime we set foot on an island they double in length and thickness, and I end up getting into fights with strangers because they some how make everyone in your general vicinity horny and I go home with bruises!

You: you wouldn't get bruises if you punched back, and these are fake! *Rips one off*

Shanks: *screams*

Benn: *flicks the ashes off his cigarette and takes a drag, watching you two bicker like it's the best entertainment he's had in weeks*

Lime: ay yo! Do you still have eyelashes?

You: of course I do. And I'm sorry other people don't know how to behave themselves and they attack me. I didn't do anything other than dress up so I felt pretty on a night out with my boyfriends and the crew.

Benn: oooh *knows you won because you're right*

Shanks: *now feels like a dick* and you do look beautiful... I'm sorry, I shouldn't have yelled at you. And you're right, I should stand up for myself. I get jealous watching the dickheads paw and pull at you, and I let it go to my head because I'm afraid one will succeed and you'll want them instead of us.

You: *smiles softly and pulls him against you by his waistband and grabs Benn's hand* well I don't want anyone else, you and Benn give me all the love and *slides your hand up Shanks chest* attention I could ever want. I wanted your attention tonight, not some stranger's.

Benn: ... Perhaps we can give him both of our attention back on the red force?

You: I like that idea

Shanks: *now very excited because he throws you over his shoulder and carries you out of the bar with Benn hot on his heels*

The next morning in the kitchen

Shanks: good morning

The crew: *frozen soon as the lock eyes with their captain*

Shanks: what's going on?

Benn: *comes in rubbing his eyes* I drank too much yesterday.

Benn: and Shanks: *make eye contact and realize you put false lashes on them in their sleep*

Benn: *stoic rage*

Shanks: am I a pretty boy, (y/n)? *Bats his eyes at you as he flexes his muscles at you*

You: *giggling*

Yassop: please never do that in our presence ever again.

Benn: (y/n) 5... 4... 3

You: oh shit *runs for it*

Benn: ...2...1 *goes barreling after you*

Yassop: *hears you scream out on deck* aren't you going after them

Shank: huh? Oh no, they're fine. Benn isn't going to hurt her in a way that she doesn't like or consent to *Watches as Benn scoops you up and carries you off through the kitchen door* but you should pull out (y/n)'s seat pillow, she's gonna need it for the next day or two.

Lime juice: *pulls it out and puts it in your chair* (y/n)'s love for punishment is not something I understand.

Shanks: you have to experience it to understand. Fuck, these are are uncomfortable. *Pulls off the lashes and attaches them to a plate so he doesn't loose them* Also (y/n) knew the consequences of putting a pair on Benn. I was just collateral damage or a practice dummy.

[neversetyoufree]

I've been thinking a bit about why Noé resonates so much with me as an ace person, and I'm realizing that, in addition to the depiction of his actual romantic relationships/attraction, the way that Noé fits into Vnc's erotic blood drinking symbolism is extremely familiar.

Overall, when someone in VnC gets their blood drunk consensually, it tends to be portrayed as part of a sexual relationship. Vanitas, for example, is attracted to Jeanne, and one part of that attraction is that he wants her to drink his blood. The blood drinking itself feels good, and he enjoys it, but his desire to be bit is not the entirety of their relationship, and Jeanne's eventual attraction to him is much the same. She likes drinking his blood, but she also pretty explicitly says she wants to sleep with him. It's a part of the whole.

Or, to give a non-VaniJeanne example, when Veronica starts going into detail about her "fling" with Marquis Machina, Domi refers to it as Veronica talking about "her sex life." So while we don't see everything she says about the encounter, I think the fact of the joking censorship itself implies that Veronica's describing something more graphic than the blood drinking we do see in other scenes. Beyond the blood drinking itself and how it feels, the broader context of the act is portrayed as sexual (and often part of a sexual relationship).

And then we have Noé.

Unlike almost everyone else in the series, when Noé talks about his desire to drink blood, it is completely abstracted out of its sexual context. When he gets The Blood Talk from his teacher, he says that he likes drinking blood because it tastes good, and though he's grown into an adult since that point, his reasoning doesn't seem to have changed. The implications of Louis's "sweet talk" suggestion (you have to charm/seduce someone before they'll let you do this physical thing with them) go completely over his head even in the present.

Furthermore, when he does drink Domi's blood, he does so completely without the further sexual context shown elsewhere. Mochijun does not shy away from showing us when characters are attracted to one another (even when they're not couples), and though Noé's perhaps a bit more complicated, since we know he struggles to identify/understand the feelings of attraction he does have, it is never once suggested that he finds Dominique attractive.

Noé enjoys an act that is objectively a bit sexual (given the physical acts/sensations involved), and that clearly has an erotic context for others who do it, but he enjoys it for more or less non-sexual reasons. He's interested in something erotic because he enjoys the physical act (the taste) of it, and probably also the general closeness/connection, but he shows no sexual attraction to his partner.

And let me tell you, for more sex-favorable ace people, that whole previous paragraph has to sound pretty familiar. Because while blood drinking doesn't work as a 1:1 parallel to real world sex, given that actual sex also exists as a separate but related option for Vnc characters, "engaging in sex-acts without the need for sexual attraction" is just. what ace people do. And so to people familiar with that experience, Noé's whole weirdly non-sexual relationship to blood starts to feel extremely ace-coded.

Even with Vanitas, I'd be remiss if I didn't point out that Noé's relationship to wanting Vani's blood also really resonates with how some ace people do experience attraction. Because again, we're never given any particular indication that Noé finds Vanitas sexually attractive, or even particularly good looking. Even accounting for the fact that queer-coding might have to be subtler or the fact that Noé's bad at recognizing his feelings, it's just not there. I'd even argue that there's better evidence of Vanitas finding Noé attractive than vice versa.

Yet, despite all that, Noé really wants Vanitas's blood. Not only that, but he wants Vanitas's blood in a way that is inextricably tied to his desire to understand him as a person. He wants him because his blood smells good, and also because he wants to see his memories, and this intense desire for physical intimacy and understanding (completely absent of sexual attraction) works really well as a metaphor for what attraction can feel like as an ace person. The metaphor, again, isn't 1:1, and it doesn't apply to every kind of ace experience, but still. Here's a character who wants to do something erotic with someone he's not sexually attracted to, and he wants to do it because 1: he thinks he'll enjoy the physical act, and 2: he thinks it'll further his relationship with/help him better understand the other person involved.

That is a really good representation of why some ace people are drawn to sex within romantic relationships.

And while in any other case I'd insist that suggesting Mochijun's queercoding is an accident is a bit insulting, I honestly have no idea what to make of this. I have no clue how known/visible asexuality is among people in Japan, but I know that in my own experience with American media, intentionally ace-coded characters are incredibly rare, so I struggle to think that I might be so lucky as to find one in shonen manga of all places. At the same time though, vnc is a series filled with a lot of different kinds of queer coding (and occasionally straight-up queerness), so if anyone was going to do it, I suppose it would be Mochijun.

But intentional or not, it's really striking to me just how well Noé's relationship to blood works as a metaphor for being interested in sexual acts as an asexual person, which I think is why so many of us end up reading him and saying "hey same." Even if you don't sit down to unpack all the symbolism, his experience is just. familiar.

[erodasfishtacos]

#HendallReunited

prompt: request was to write broad but to write something angsty

Word count: 5.2k

Warnings: language, sexual content, angst

Harry always had issues with saying ‘no’ to people. He never quite grew out of his manners even when he should have.

He said ‘yes’ to way too many things- signing autographs for rude fans and paparazzi, and agreed to way too many things Jeff suggested.

Saying yes to everything didn’t make his life any easier is the thing. Especially when it came to his wife. She was usually left with the aftermath of him being too nice.

The media painted Y/N in a negative light occasionally and so did the fans because she would stand up for Harry and not let him say ‘yes’ to every single request.

She would tell disrespectful fans he’s not signing autographs because of the way they were screaming and interrupting his work.

Harry wished he could do it himself - admired that his wife didn’t give a fuck what people thought about her. He cared entirely too much what the world would think.

The couple didn’t fight about much - no, not really. Normal couple stuff for the most part. But this was the exception, this is where Y/N found most of their turmoil.

Every few months it would rear it’s ugly head and they’d find themselves in the same position over and over again.

This time - it was really fucking bad.

The couple had been staying in their Los Angeles home for the last few months whilst the singer finalized his album and began promotion.

It was boring meeting among boring lunch outings to get all their ducks in a row. Jeff - his manager the main orchestrator.

He was a great manager and a good friend, but it was also business too which Harry didn’t always comprehend.

At the end of the day, Harry was making Jeff millions upon millions of dollars. But Harry didn’t think that way.

**

Harry was in a stuffy conference room at the The Late Late Show to work on the script and ideas for the show. Promo had been nonstop.

He was a bit tired as it was nearly just hitting eight in the morning and he had been up late with you - having some late night loving in the hot tub.

“As for guest - Kendall Jenner,” James Corden’s producer states. All the men agree but Harry is taken aback.

“Why...why would we have my ex-girlfriend as one of my guests?” Harry interrupts, confusion knitting his brows.

Kendall and him didn’t end on a bad note - not at all. They hooked up a few times after their ‘break-up’ but once he’d met Y/N she was understanding when he cut it off.

Y/N wasn’t necessarily jealous of the model, but didn’t love when they’d run into each other at events. She was still overtly flirty with Harry without much shame. 

Harry also didn’t have an desire to see her or host her as a guest on the show. She was nice but he wasn’t interested in being friends with her. They didn’t have much in common and he was head over heels for his wife.

“The media will eat it up, dude. Harry Styles and Kendall Jenner reunited on a show after four years?” Jeff smiles, the others nodding in amicable agreement.

This is one of this times where Harry needs to say “no,” that it’s disrespectful to his significant other to use an old flame for promo for his album.

He already knows ‘hendall’ will be trending within minutes and he can’t imagine how that would make his parter feel.

“I just...this doesn’t seem like a good idea?” Harry begins hesitantly, making it sound more like a question than a statement. 

“Why not?” Eric, one of the writers asks.

“Y’know, I’m married. I don’t think m’missus would appreciate if I did somethin’ like that just for promotion,” he states, scratching at his jaw uncomfortably.

“Look Styles, we’re not asking you to fuck the girl. It just a interview, c’mon,” The executive producer gruffs - wanting those guaranteed views.

Harry swallows - looking at his manager and then at everyone else at the table looking at him for an affirmative answer.

“Uh-sure,” Harry fumbles, feeling anxiety rise into his throat. Fuck, he’s such a god damn pushover.

He’s trying to find his voice to go back on his agreement but the meeting wrapping up and people are leaving with final handshakes.

**

Harry doesn’t know how to tell Y/N what is going on. He’d been keeping in stored in the back of his mind, not ready to have a blowout.

He never found the perfect time to bring it up and now it was too late. It was the morning of the show and he was due to be at the rehearsals this afternoon.

Harry had finally decided he was going to tell her this morning over coffee but forgot that she had a girl’s day planned with a few friends.

She was already out to breakfast with them when he woke up. His phone had one text from you.

Hi baby. I’m out with the girls. See you at the show tonight. I’ll meet you there around six! Love you!

He was fucked royally and he had no one to blame but himself. Maybe it’d be okay, maybe she’d roll her eyes and tell him he’s an idiot.

Realistically he knew that was just a sweet dream at this point.

—

Harry was fidgety and kept mucking up his lines during rehearsal as it got closer to the showtime and his missus arriving.

Kendall had arrived for hair and makeup without seeing her ex-boyfriend yet. He dreaded seeing the model.

Kendall and Y/N had met a few times at different events. It was always cordial. Kendall was always casual - their relationship was never more than a couple fun dates and sex.

They were kind to each other when they met but he couldn’t deny how much harder his partner kissed him on the mouth afterwards.

Before he know it, his wife is hugging him from behind as he talks to a producer about which cameras to look at.

Y/N noticed the way he tensed up at first and thought about how unusual that was for him. Normally, he’d lean back into her with his full weight causing them both to stumble and laugh.

He slowly, cautiously turns around and his face  relaxes a little bit but not completely. “Hi baby,” he hums, leaning in for a kiss.

“You look so handsome,” she replies, admiring his brown pinstriped suit and her pearl necklace that he’d snagged awhile back. She thought it looked better on him anyways.

“You look even better, s’fuckin’ pretty, love,” he gushes, coming back in for another kiss - a little too sensual for the setting.

She was donned in a cropped white shirt, showing of the smooth expanse of her tummy. An oversized blazer of Harry’s, ripped jeans, and heels. 

Harry thought fleetingly he couldn’t wait to fuck her after the show. Then remembered that mostly wouldn’t happen.

Reggie, the musical lead, slides up to you two. He smiles wide at you, saying, “Can’t believe you agreed to the guest this evening.”

Her eyebrows furrow in confusion, Harry’s raise nearly to his forehead, but when she opens her mouth to ask him to explain they’re interrupted.

“Harry!” The leggy model trots over to the little group. Dressed in an interesting one-piece suit that has sewn in heels. She looked beautiful as ever, of course she was a model.

Both of them turn towards the oblivious girl, “Kendall,” Harry replies with a twinge of anxiety - eyes repeatedly looking at his significant other’s profile as multiple emotions flash.

“Hiya, you’re Y/N right?” Kendall smiles kindly, offering her manicured hand.

She accepts, “Yeah, uh-good to see you again.”

Harry knew she had connected the dots quickly in her head. The hurt, confusion, had hit her eyes before narrowing into full-blown rage at her partner.

“I promise I’ll go easy on him,” Kendall jokes before pinching at Harry’s cheek teasingly. The model was a natural flirt with everyone she got along with.

“Oh, sure,” she replies lamely, attempting to not let her feelings burst out in that moment with her husband . She knew it wasn’t Kendall’s fault.

“I’m going to go grab a bite to eat. I’m probably gonna puke when we do ‘spill or fill’. See you guys soon,” the model waves before trailing off with her assistant.

“Did you kn- of course you knew she was your guest,” Y/N seethes, turning to fully face the guilt-stricken-singer.

He rubs the back of his neck, avoiding eye contact, “I did.”

“How long have you known for?” She demands to know, keeping her voice at an angry whisper to not draw attention.

Harry wasn’t going to lie to his love, “About two weeks.”

Y/N replies with a laugh, “let me guess, you let Jeffrey talk you into this bullshit, again.”

His silence is all she needs to know it’s true.

“For Christ’s sake, of course,” She huffs bitterly, “what’s even worse is you didn’t fucking tell me. What the fuck?”

Harry bites his lip, not able to rasp out anything but a pathetic, “m’sorry, love.”

He wasn’t usually good at taking responsibility during a fight. He was stubborn at best but he couldn’t deny his way out of this.

“You will be, you-“

They were cut off by the staff, the audience was trailing in and Harry needed to get mic’d up now.

“This conversation isn’t over,” she points her finger at his chest before storming off to the side of the stage where she’d watch from.

Fucking shit.

**

Harry was a performer. It’s easy for him to push things to the back of his mind so he can entertain a enamored audience.

But tonight, he was struggling. Eyes flicking over to the teleprompter more than usual, his demeanor not as vivid and carefree.

Not when his wife was glaring daggers at him from stage right. Her hand constantly at her mouth, biting at her nails - a nervous tick of hers.

“Next up, the one, the only, the beautiful model and one of my good friends, Kendall Jenner!” Harry introduces when she walks out and waves at the crowd.

They hug and when they pull apart they step over to where they were playing the game. Either answer the question or eat a nasty food picked out by the other.

They weren’t allowed to see each other’s questions before the game started- both going on blind which put Harry more on edge.

“Okay, Kendall. Rank the members of One Direction on most to least attractive or you will be eating...” Harry spins the table, “Cow tongue.”

She flinched at the disgusting plate, smirking up at Harry before considering her course of action, “I think I can answer this one.”

He wasn’t looking forward to her answer. Neither was Y/N by the way she nearly shaking her foot off her leg.

“Okay, I got this. You - the most attractive, then uh- Zayn....Louis...Niall...Liam,” she laughs, “but all of you are hot!”

Harry fake laughs and acts like he’s impressed by her answer as the crowd roars and cheers. 

When Kendall picks up her notecard - she laughs in surprise at the question before looking at him with bright eyes.

“Okay, um, bull penis!” She giggles before starting the question, “I’m dying to know this answer. So...your first album HS1 was released four years ago, correct?”

He nods, apprehensive.

“Which songs were about me? Especially was only angel?” She laughs at Harry’s pale expression before without another thought he shovels the rancid food into his mouth.

Harry looks off to the side to see that his missus is no longer sitting there. Just Jeff - who gives him a thumbs up.

**

The first thing he did when the show ended and the lights dimmed was bolt off to Jeff - ignoring Kendall who was about to say something to him.

“Where’d Y/N go?”

He thought she might have went out to get a breathe of fresh air but for the next hour and a half he hasn’t seen her once.

“She said she wasn’t feeling very good. She told me to tell you she’d meet you at home,” Jeff shrugs unbothered.

“Damnit!” Harry curses loudly, ripping out of the microphone and the little pack in his back waistband.

“Harry,” Jeff scolds at his unprofessionalism that was abnormal for him.

“No! Don’t fucking ever ask me to do shit like this again. You fucking knew what questions were on those notecards and you said it wasn’t anything about our previous relationship.”

“Harry-“

“Don’t fucking talk to me. You’re a real shit manager sometimes, you know that? Do not contact me tonight or tomorrow for that matter, you douchebag,” Harry barks before storming off towards the dressing rooms.

All the employees were standing around in shock, staring at the popstar as he ignored everyone around him.

Harry was famously known for being a kind, amicable guy. So it took everyone by surprise to hear him speak like that. Even Jeff was shaken up a little.

—

The house was pitch-black as Harry pulled up. The house’s first floor was lined with large, bay windows and not a single light was on.

He could find one room illuminated which was your bedroom. A dim side lamp must have been flicked on. He imagined her purposely turning off all the lights on the trek up the staircase.

Harry didn’t want to admit how much he was trembling with awful nerves and anticipation as he slowly turns the knob of the shared bedroom.

Y/N wasn’t laying in bed as he expected but found the bathroom door shut tightly. He noticed a little yellow bag with tissue paper off to the side by a dresser.

He knocks on the oak door, not daring to enter without permission.

“What do you want?” Y/N answers, tone flat and emotionless. 

“Can I come in, baby? Please...” He wasn’t ashamed to beg for forgiveness at this point. Hearing the emptiness in her tone scared him shitless.

“I really could care less,” She replies coldly from her spot in the scalding water decorated with bubbles.

Harry had never felt more unsure in his life as he enters the bathroom.  Y/N had gotten proper pissed at him or vice versa before - right before a concert, an award ceremony but she’d never left without him.

Her head was laying against the foam headrest and her body was covered by the soap water. She looked tired and her eyes were puffy from crying.

Harry kneels next to the tub, “look at me, please pet.”

 Y/N takes a moment before turning her head and opening her eyes. They were distant, disappointed in the man in front of her.

“I should have told you about Kendall. I should have put up more of a fight to get someone else on instead,” Harry admits, his hands desperately wanting to reach out for her.

She shakes her head with a heart-wrenching sniffle, “it’s not just tonight, Harry. We’ve had this conversation continuously for three and a half fucking years. You try to please everyone, despite them giving no fucks about you.”

“Are you that much of a pushover? You let your ex-girlfriend flirt with you in front of millions. Do you know how embarrassing and unfair that it to me?” She wipes at her eyes to stop the tears spilling over.

Harry hadn’t thought of it like that - to be honest. But he agrees, it wasn’t fair and downright cruel to do that to her.

What? All because he couldn’t say ‘no’ because he didn’t want people to be mad at him? It was pathetic and ridiculous.

“I-I won’t let it happen again, lovie. I mean it, I truly do,” Harry whimpers reaching over to cup her cheek and wants to cry when she pushes him away.

“You’re a broken record. You’ve said that a million times before but don’t change,”  Y/N points out, eyes boring furiously into his wife’s.

“I’m goi-“

She cuts him off with a sharp edge in her tone, “Just leave me alone, get out.”

The man’s face crumbles and for a second, she wants to just end the fight and makeup but then nothing would change.

“Baby-“

“Get out!” She finally bellows, tears streaming down her face steadily.

He obliges, head hung in defeat as he closes the door behind him. He stands there’s blankly for a second before going to the walk-in closet.

He’s pulling out a fresh pair of cotton underwear and a large sleepshirt for his partner, laying them neatly on the bed.

Harry doesn’t know what to do with himself while he waits so he pulls out his phone to mindlessly scroll.

He throws it against the wall when he sees #hendallreunited is trending number one on Twitter at the moment.

The singer strips down to his briefs and sits with his back against the tufted headboard, staring blankly at the wall.

His eyes catch a neon pink pair of his swimshorts tossed carelessly on the decorative vase in the corner of the room from the night before .

“Fuck, baby - no need to rush,” Harry groans into Y/N ‘s mouth as she pushes him until he’s sat on the edge of their California king.

She reaches impatiently for the tie on his neon pink swimshorts and yanks them off his slim, peach-fuzz thighs before throwing them onto the vase without a care that it was worth over twenty-thousand pounds.

After edging her in the hot tub with his fingers and mouth, she wasn’t waiting any longer before clambering onto his lap, pulling her swim bottoms to the side, and sinking onto him.

He felt guilty when his cock twitched at the thought of it. But when reality set back in, the arousal with the memory evaporated.

It isn’t much longer until the door is pulled open and  Y/N’s padding into the room with a towel secured around her.

She looks at the clothes Harry set out for her and pointedly walks past them to pick out her own nightwear. 

That really shouldn’t make his eyes tear up as he watches her slide on a similar pair of panties and an oversized shirt. Spotting a purpling bruise on her upper in thigh from his mouth.

 Y/N silently walks past the bed and to the bedroom door, looking back before bleakly stating, “I’m going to sleep in the guest room.”

He frowns, wrinkles appearing on his forehead, “You can sleep in here, love. I’ll take the guest room.”

Harry doesn’t get a reply as she just shakes her head and closes the door loudly behind her. 

It’s just - he’s never seen her this upset. She was usually fantastic at communicating her feelings and hashing things out.

She wasn’t one for the silent treatment or ignoring the topic. It had his chest rising faster than usual with anxiety. The serious of it overwhelming him.

He states at the wall for a very long time without wiping the fat tears brimming over his trembling lips.

*

He couldn’t sleep - it was half past three and he hadn’t even laid down or clicked off the lamp.

Harry accepted sleep wasn’t coming so he begins to tidy the already clean room. He picks up the shorts and tossing them in the hamper.

He refolds some joggers he’d carelessly shoved in a drawer and when he went to move the little yellow bag - curiosity got the best of him.

There was no card and he wasn’t sure who it was for or if it had been a gift already give to Y/N that she had returned home with.

Harry really shouldn’t - but he does. Gently tugging out the paper and reaching in to feel fabric.

Pulling it out, it takes him a minute to identify what it is - two baby onesie. Who was having a baby?

He lays them in front of him, eyes widening in surprise as he reads what is printed across the black cotton.

The first one was the colors and font of his upcoming tour merch with the photo he used on his tour announcement with the heeled boot and white pants.

Love on Tour - Due Date: September 2025

With Special Guest Appearance from Baby Styles

The second one was simple and read across the chest:

I’m having your baby (and it is your business) with embroidered kiwis all of over it.

He frantically reached back into the bag to pull out a bundle of pregnancy tests tied with a silk bow.

They weren’t necessarily trying for a baby but they’re weren’t not trying either. Harry wanted a baby as soon as his missus was willing to give him one.

“No, no, don’t one,” she’d whined into his mouth when he’d reached over to grab a condom off the nightstand.

“Oh sweet thing, you want me bare? Fill you up?” He croons happily, coming back to grip at his thick base and tease at her entrance.

“Ye-yeah, H. Please,” (Y/N) whimpers, bucking her hips in the hope he’d slip inside her.

Harry hums, “Might give you a baby though, y’want me to knock you up?”

“Want it, wan-“

He cuts her off with a hard, blissful kiss as he thrusts all the way inside before pulling out to do it again. 

“Gonna give it to you, whatever you want, lovie,” he promises.

The two had never used protection afterwards. It had start about seven months ago and from his knowledge she’d still been getting her periods regularly.

Occasionally, he would palm at her flat tummy and pout, “Haven’t put a baby in you yet, ‘ave I?”

He was so ecstatic but disappointed in himself for ruining everything and pleasing everyone other than who he should be.

Harry needed to fix this. He didn’t want Y/N to lose the excitement of having their baby over a dumb choice of his.

The man’s out of the room and not knocking before entering their guest room. His now pregnant love is laying on-top of the covers.

One hand subconsciously on her belly - which she removes and places next to her when her wife walks in.

The television was on but the volume was low and Y/N wasn’t watching it in the first place anyways.

Harry sits on the edge of the bed, “I opened the yellow bag.”

She looks at him with wide eyes, a little taken aback. she was going to surprise him tonight and forgot to store it away for another time after the fight.

Harry has happy tears dribbling down his cheeks, “you’re having my baby?”

Y/N nods, running a slight hand through his curls. She still had a nasty knot of anger and uncertainty in the pit of her stomach.

It pains her, wanting to share this moment of excitement with Harry but she just couldn’t. The uncertainty of whether Harry would put everybody’s needs before his own baby.

“Come back to bed, want t’talk and celebrate. M’so bloody excited,” Harry murmurs, a large smile decorating his face as he smooths a palm over the expanse of her tummy.

His wife shakes her head and places a hand over his, feeling the cold metal of all of them. “I want to be left alone.”

The twinkle in Harry’s eye diminishes to devastation as he realizes that he’s fucked up so badly that she doesn’t even want to celebrate.

“Pet, can...we just forget about it tonight and be happy ‘bout the baby?” Harry asks selfishly, knowing it was unlikely she’d agree.

She didn’t, a firm expression on her face, “no, I have a lot to think about.”

“Like wha’?” He asks anxiously, unknowing of quite the reason she was so furious.

“Like how you say yes to everything and everyone. We talk and talk about how you need to say ‘no’ and do what’s best for you - for us. You agree to and never follow through”

She takes a shaky breath and continues, “it’s affected our relationship before when you’ve had to cancel our vacation away from all this for a charity concert you’d agree to perform at last minute, dinner reservations because you told your friend we’d be at their art showing they wanted you at.”

Harry knew she was right. He did those things. He wanted everyone to be happy with him - to a fault.

“Tonight was just icing on the cake, you allowed your manager to talk you into hosting your ex on that show. Out of all the people in the world - her. With flirty questions and jabs from her. You let that happen. You care about making everyone happy but in return you don’t care how it affects me. That’s pretty shitty.”

“I’m...I’m really fucking scared you’ll do that even when we have the baby. I need you to put them first and right now...I’m not sure if you’re going to. You can’t put the person you want to spend the rest of your life with first now, how do I know you’ll do it with the baby?”

Harry chokes out a sob as he presses his forehead against the bed, his broad shoulders shaking. He couldn’t remember the last time he’d cried this hard - years ago maybe. He felt like his wife didn’t have any faith in him and he was to blame.

He looks up at her with swollen eyes - at a loss for what to do or say. He loved her so much and was over the moon that they were going to have a baby.

“How do I fix this, darling? You’re right, I really fucked up. M’sorry,” Harry cries, grabbing at her hands and she allows it.

“Just saying you’re sorry won’t fix it,” Y/N replies flatly, letting Harry squeeze and kiss at the backs of her hands.

“Then what do I bloody do to fix this?” Harry raises his voice in frustration, staring in bewilderment at his wife. 

Y/N narrows her eyes at him, “Do not raise your voice at me, Harry. Actions speak louder than words.”

Harry swallows harshly, pressing one finally kiss to her hand. “Okay.”

“Okay?” She repeats.

“I love you, I’ll fix this,” he promises with conviction. He knew what he needed to do and do it tomorrow. So he and his wife could enjoy her new pregnancy.

“I need space tonight, I just...please”Y/N says quietly, rubbing at his shoulder.

It wasn’t the first time they’ve slept in separate rooms because they weren’t getting along but they normally found their way back to each other before sunrise.

Harry nods, lip still tremble with the residual anxiety of the conversation. She allows him to press a soft kiss to her mouth before leaving the room.

—-

Cafe Habana was busy - but no one was paying much attention to Harry and Jeff. It was the morning after and Harry had demanded a meeting over breakfast with his manager.

“Y/N pregnant,” Harry states bluntly after their drinks arrive.

“Oh? Congratulations, dude. That’s exciting!” Jeff leans over to pat him on the shoulder, a big smile.

“The baby is due in September. My next tour starts in next July. The baby will be about nine months. I want to be at home with them for the first year.”

Jeff doesn’t look pleased, “what are you getting at Harry?”

“Reschedule the July and August tour dates. Tack them on to the end of the tour,” Harry lays out flat. 

He hadn’t talk to his wife about this but he knew this was how he could prove that he could say ‘no’ and not be a pushover.

“No Harry. Look I get you’re excited about the baby - but that will be such a fucking hassle,” Jeff frowns, sipping his mimosa.

“I’m not asking, Jeff. I’m telling you that’s what needs to happen,” Harry replies firmly, tone strong and unwavering.

Jeff is definitely taken aback by his client’s conviction. 

“While we’re on the topic, do not ever put me in a situation like you did yesterday. It affected my wife and I. And I will choose her over this career any day.”

The manager nods in surprise, “Harry, I’m sorry.”

“I’m not asking for an apology but if you ever pull something like then I’ll be looking for a new management team. Are we clear?” 

Jeff once again nods, unsure of where this is coming from but at the thought of losing his biggest client would be disastrous so he’d do whatever to accommodate him.

“Consider it done,” he tells Harry before clearing his throat in a slight panic.

—

Y/N woke up to an empty house. She was restless, she asked Harry to prove to her that he could be what she needed. However, it was a bit unfair because she didn’t know how he could do it.

It’s just…she had a baby to think about. They both needed to be put first and if it took a gnarly fight for Harry to realize it...so be it.

“Baby? Love, where are you?” She hears Harry echo through the whole house. She was sat in the kitchen, on a stool by the island, idly sorting through mail.

“In here!”

Harry jogs in, panting like he sprinted from the garage up to the kitchen. He comes to stand in front of the love of his life.

“I might have not completely fixed everything but...I tried,” Harry tells her, cradling her face in his large palms. “ I just got back from lunch with Jeff. I told him about the baby.”

He takes a deep breath before continuing, “I rescheduled tour dates so I can be with you guys at home in London for the first year. Then...maybe you guys can join me after?”

“Harry…” she’s at a loss for words.

“And I told Jeff that if he ever puts me in a situation like that again, I’m firing him.”

Y/N stares at him, in awe and admiration of the man she chose to marry and keep forever. His face was so sincere and vulnerable.

Harry didn’t know whether it would be enough. If it wasn’t he’d keep trying but all he could do was hope. He waited with bated breath as she processed his words.

“Baby, you-for me?” She murmurs as she stands up and crowds into his space. He instantly wraps her up into a tight hug, missing her touch.

“Of course, pet. I’d do anything for you, I mean it. I’d quit this whole career if you wanted tha’,” he tells her truthfully - lips brushing her forehead.

“I love you, so so much,” Y/N murmurs, pressing a kiss to his lips.

“We’re havin’ a baby,'' Harry sighs dreamily into her mouth, tongue sliding against hers. A large hand came to palm at her belly.

“Yeah, m‘having your baby,” She giggles as he begins to trail the kisses down her jaw and neck - pressing her into the marble countertop.

“Should we name it Kiwi?” Harry rasps as he slides the tank top strap off her shoulder so his lips can meet the cap of her warm shoulder.

“We are not going to be that celebrity couple who names their baby something weird,” Y/N groans as he grounds his hips into hers with intent.

THE END

[lubdubsworld]

⋆⋆✵ Perfect Imperfections ✵⋆⋆

Chapter 1

Genre : Arranged Marriage AU! Angst! Explicit Sexual Content.

Rating : 21+

Warnings : Ableism , Chronic disability. OC has limited use of her left leg, Emotional infidelity? Mild Cheating ( nothing very physical.. a kiss or so )

Summary : Marrying Jungkook is a mistake. Falling in love with him? Definitely the worst exercise in masochism .

~~~~~~~~~~

Chapter 2

No one tells you how easy it is to imagine yourself in love with a beautiful man. Especially when you don’t have a clear understanding of what love actually is. 

When I met Jungkook, even knowing he was in love with my sister hadn’t done much to douse the flames of hope and attraction. He was a lot of things that other men in my life weren’t. Kind without being pitying. Concerned without being overbearing. He took care of me without making me feel helpless. And there was always such a thin line between these things that I found myself impressed by his ability to toe the line so well.

Jungkook took care of me without making me feel like a burden and I suppose, some part of me had assumed that this could, in due time turn into love. But I was clearly wrong.

Jungkook and Liza had been kissing in the hallway of their hotel room and someone had taken pictures. My father and his had managed to get them taken down but the news was already out, spreading like wildfire . My phone began ringing sometime around eight in the morning and hadn’t stopped. It was now a little past one in the afternoon and I felt queasy, despite the assurances that it was all being taken care of.

It was the pity in everyone’s face that I couldn’t bear.

I wasn’t hurt. Angry, yes? Upset? Of course. But I wasn’t hurt because there really was nothing to be hurt about. Jungkook didn’t love me. He was in love with my sister . He had made it clear, through his words and his actions, over and over again. At this point, I could see this debacle as nothing more than a possible way to get out of the marriage. Perhaps, my father would approve of a divorce?

I glanced at the article again.

The photo is just so annoyingly clear, I thought with a grimace. If it was a little blurry, I could convince myself it wasn’t him and her. But it was clear. That was my husband with his lips locked with my sister’s. Against my better judgment, I read the article again. It was a gossip column, of course there would be nothing good in there. But sometimes curiosity can be a persistent thing.

I felt my skin crawling as I realized that the phrases were all pretty true. There was no gossip here. Just plain facts.

And then my eyes reached the end of the article.

Of note is the fact that Jeon Jungkook’s wife is disabled and perhaps the virile young man is merely looking for pleasure he can’t find in his own marital bed.

I swallowed, quickly exiting the page and tossing the phone on the bed, away from me. I stared out of the window of our bedroom, the large doors left open to let air and sunlight in. There was a tall sycamore tree right outside out bedroom and the branches almost reached in and I stared at the rustling leaves, trying to scrub my mind clean of the words I’d just read.

But it was impossible.

It wasn’t something I hadn’t thought of. The stark difference between me and Jungkook, physically. He spent five days a week in the gym and they were right. He was a young man with healthy sexual appetites.

I’d never cheat on you. Jungkook’s voice from a week ago still echoed somewhere inside my skull.

I sighed, playing with my wedding ring.

I wasn’t a virgin when I married Jungkook. Hadn’t been one , when I got into the accident either. My then boyfriend, a tall strapping lit major had been a very sexual guy as well and our libidos had matched pretty well. But I’d been an athletic nineteen year old, able to bend like a pretzel at his whim and there was just endless time and endless stamina and just a whole lot of attraction . We had spent hours, exploring each other the way college kids do. Weekends in bed spent trying every possible permutation of sex positions and kinks and I’d discovered all the things I liked. All the things I didn’t.

But then the accident had happened and well, when you’re in crippling agony, sometimes sex takes the backseat. I’d been focused on my recovery, on making sure that I came out of this at least with the ability to walk and I’d succeeded. Burying the part of me that craved a man’s touch, it wasn’t easy but it was necessary.

And then Jungkook had happened.

Sex with Jungkook hadn’t been difficult. Not really. I wasn’t completely crippled after all but it was also nowhere near as exciting as it could be with someone who had full use of her legs. I knew that. It was kind of obvious. But I hadn’t dwelt too much on it because to be honest, Jungkook hadn’t looked like he’d minded. He had seemed to enjoy himself .

But then reading about how he probably hadn’t enjoyed it definitely stung.

Worse yet, probably half the country was reading it with me. I felt nauseous. Did no one think that they should have left the last part out of that article? It was terrible enough without adding that bit about me.

A faint buzzing made me turn to the bed.

I glanced at my phone as it rang, my father in law’s name prominent on the screen.

Showtime, I thought with a grimace.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“I suppose it was too much to hope for , expecting that boy  to keep his dignity. This is outrageous.” Mr. Jeon’s loud voice rang through the foyer of the house and I flinched, gripping the edge of the futon as Sana jumped a bit . She sat next to me, holding my hand carefully. Moral support I supposed but I was feeling entirely too blasé about the whole thing. None of this was unexpected, I thought miserably and I wasn’t feeling up to pretending otherwise.

“I still wish they’d talked to me about this.”

My brother in law’s voice broke me out of my thoughts. The man looked like he’d been dragged through hell and back and I felt a pang of genuine sympathy. He looked wrecked and it was obvious she was in love with my sister. Resentment coiled thick and deep inside me. Resentment and envy.

With no effort at all she had charmed both the Jeon brothers, I thought bitterly.

Jeon Jihyun looked absolutely stricken at the thought of losing his wife.  

“I’ve asked Lisa to take the first flight out. She called me this morning, hysterical. It was something done in the heat of the moment. She .. She’s very apologetic. I believe her and I’m willing to forgive her. We’re…. We’re thinking of starting a family together. ” He said softly and my stomach turned.

I felt my skin go ice cold as I wrapped my arms around myself. Shivering just a bit, I lightly squeezed Sana’s hand. She looked at me in askance and I had to swallow to get my voice out, throat dry. The words made me want to retch. I could imagine how Jungkook would take this news.

“Can you get me my shawl? It’s in the green room.” I said hoarsely.  She bowed before moving away from me and when I looked back up, Jihyun’s gaze caught mine.

“This must be hard on you.” He said softly and I flushed, staring down at my knees.

“Not like I can run from it. Literally or figuratively.” I smiled without mirth.

“Jungkook is …he’s just confused. He needs some time to sort himself out. I’ve asked him to take a break and come back to Seoul after a couple of weeks. The separation would do him some good.” Jihyun said quietly and I sighed before nodding. What else was I supposed to say to that anyway? There wasn’t much I could do, my influence on things almost nonexistent at this point.

“Are you going to give the boy a break, Jeon?” My father demanded, staring at Jungkook’s father who sighed.

“Yes. I’ve been trying to get these damned reporters off our back. They’re all over the place. And yes, I think Jungkook should stay in Japan for a while.  We’re starting a new distribution branch there and I wanted him to scout places and possible vendors. I’ll tell him to hash out all the details before coming back.”

His phone rang again and he excused himself . I watched him leave the room, trying to make sense of his words.

How long would it take to build a whole branch in Japan? I had no clue. But it could hardly be done in a few weeks, could it?

“That’s.. That’s a long time.” I said hesitantly and my father frowned.

“is that a problem?” he asked.

I sighed. There was no point keeping this to myself. I was supposed to go to the doctor’s tomorrow. And well, it would be better if they heard it from me first.

“I.. I’m pregnant.” I said quietly.

The silence that followed was deafening. I stared at the carpet, not able to bring myself to look up at them. I could guess, what I’d find there. It was what I always found in people’s faces.

“Oh, sweet child.” My father’s sigh made me look up and there it was. The pity. I felt sick to my stomach. Sana returned, settling the hand knit shawl over my shoulders and I wrapped it tight, before glancing at her in some desperation. She smiled reassuringly, settling next to me and gently taking my fingers in hers. The warmth grounded me for a second and when Jihyun growled, I stared at him.

“I… I didn’t know. Fuck, I’m going to kill Jungkook. This fucker…” Jihyung swore and my father sighed, clearly thinking hard.

“you can’t be staying alone now.” He said softly, sitting up and cracking his knuckles, and I swallowed. I wouldn’t bear it if they tried to take me back home. I had hated it there.

“ You must come back home with me.” He said softly but I quickly shook my head.

“ No.. No I won’t. I … Please.” I begged, the mere idea of going back to my childhood home a nightmare. My mother would kill me with just her sharp and vindictive words. I was in no shape to put up with her verbal and emotional abuse. It was one of the things that had made me agree to marry Jungkook in the first place.

“Well, you can’t stay here by yourself.” My father protested. I’ve been by myself my whole damn life, I wanted to scream.

“I’ll be fine. I have Sana and the others to help me.” I said tiredly. My father shook his head before turning to Jihyun again.

“Is Namjoon still working on his book?” My father asked him and Jihyun frowned. The name elicited a tug in my memory and I turned to stare at my father, confused.

“You remember him? He used to tutor you when you were hi High School.”

I had a brief flashback to dimples and almond shaped eyes. I remembered him vaguely. Very vaguely. But nowhere well enough to want him to live with me, alone or not.  

“Dad…” I protested but he held a hand up to silence me, nodding at Jihyun .

“Namjoon? Kim Namjoon? ” He shook his head. “ I’m not sure. Why?”

“I think it would be good if he moves in here. His father was telling me that he was looking for a place to stay, now that he’s moved back to Korea. ” My father said softly, staring at me and I stiffened.

“Father…” I began desperately and my father shook his head.

“Don’t argue. He was a dear friend of yours. I don’t think you should be alone at a time like this. And I think Jungkook would approve. Like Jihyun said, the kid needs some space to sort himself out. Let him finish whatever business is going on in Japan.” My father glanced at Mr. Jeon who looked at me with guilt.

“I owe you an apology , on behalf of my idiot son.”

I looked away, not sure what to say to that. I hated the man quite passionately. Jungkook wasn’t perfect… far from it. But this man had taken a sledgehammer to my husband’s mind and heart at every turn. The disdain, the condescension, the sick way he favored his brother over him, the way nothing Jungkook did was ever good enough. It had all taken a toll on my husband. I had watched it chip away at Jungkook’s self confidence, at his mental health.

“I think more than anything, you owe an apology to your son. You knew he was in love with Lisa and yet…. You forced him to marry me.” I said quietly and the room went eerily quiet. My father rounded on me , eyes blazing.

“Leah!!! Apologize, now!” He roared and I looked away.

“You’re all the same. Ungrateful and entitled.” Mr. Jeon said sharply, before turning to his son. “ I’m leaving Jihyun-ah. Tell me when that wife of yours get home. I want to talk to her.”

He shared a half hug with my father before stalking off and my father grabbed his jacket as well.

“I’ll leave as well. Your mother is being quite hysterical. Apparently, all her friends are hounding her about the article.” He sighed and I nodded , watching him shrug on the jacket before nodding at Jihyun and then following his friend out to the front doors.

Jihyun stayed standing , watching my father’s form disappear through the door before turning to me.

“ Are you alright?” He said quietly, moving to kneel in front of me. Sana stood up, bowing before leaving and I watched her disappear into the hallway leading to the kitchens. Jihyun’s fingers wrapped around mine, brushing my knees and I stared down at him.

“The question is, are you alright?” I brushed the hair off his face. He sighed.

“No. No I’m not. I’m angry and jealous and very much filled with resentment towards my brother.” He said honestly and I laughed, tugging on his hand and patting the seat next to me. He straightened before moving to settle next to me and I leaned on his shoulders, sighing as he wrapped on around me, the warmth of his body comforting .

“Are you going to give your marriage a chance?” I asked carefully.

“She told me she was going to break things off for good. We.. We’ve been talking about it. Starting a family, making this work.” He said quietly. I nodded. It was understandable. Unlike Jungkook and I , Jihyun had a responsibility. He would need a son and even though people liked to act like they didn’t care much about gender, like they didn’t care much about having children , it was sort of an unspoken rule. First son of the house ? You had to have a male heir to carry the family name.

I wondered how that conversation had gone between Jungkook and Lisa. It didn’t really match the photo I’d seen.

“I suppose Jungkook probably put up a fight. He genuinely wants to end up with her. He… He tells me often that he loves her and can’t love anyone else. ” I wondered if I ought to feel embarrassed or insulted.

But the truth was, I was numb to a lot of things that had once hurt quite a lot..

The conversation with Jungkook about my pregnancy had definitely cleared things up for me. There was nothing there worth salvaging. Chasing something that wasn’t real , that was foolishness. Especially when I had a very real baby to think about. A child that counted on me to make the right choices.

“I don’t think he did. She spoke to me last night and said that he agreed. Of course that was before the article came out. I’d like to think she didn’t lie to me but I’m not sure.”

I sighed, settling in closer to his chest. He was warm and firm, solid and reliable. I wondered if it would have been easier, if my father had just married me off to Jihyun instead. Jihyun and I …we were alike. We had been friends , even from childhood. Had watched with fond adoration as our younger siblings had fallen madly, wildly in love. Jungkook and Liza had been drawn to each other from the first. Inevitable.

Jihyun and I were more carefree. We didn’t feel things that intensely and perhaps that was why we could sit here in the calm of the afternoon air, quiet and introspective when we ought to be furious and raging.

“ Should we run off together? You and i?” He said suddenly making me laugh.

“Very much incapable of running.” I reminded him with a grin and he squeezed my shoulder .

“I’d carry you.” He said simply.

“Where would we go?” I asked curiously, indulging the fantasy for just a few minutes.

“Somewhere far away. Maybe India? There’s so many people there and we could get lost in the crowds.”

“That does sound appealing.” I smiled and turned to look up at him. His face inches from mine, not as handsome as Jungkook but strong featured and kind. “ But I’m not alone anymore. I have a child.”

His gaze dipped to my lap.

“Yes. Jungkook’s child.” He said thoughtfully.

“No. Mine. Nobody else’s . Just mine.” I said quietly. Jihyun’s gaze softened. He pressed a quick kiss to the top of my head.

“I’m sorry.” He whispered, echoing his father’s words.” On behalf of my idiot brother, I’m sorry.”

And where Mr. Jeon’s words hadn’t made any sort of impact, Jihyun’s made my heart clench and ache in the worst way. Self pity was something I loathed but sometimes, being handed the short end of the stick at every turn in life makes it impossible to not feel sorry for yourself.

Tears stung, welling up in my eyes and spilling over my lashes like water bubbling out of an aquifer.

I blinked slowly, not bothering to wipe them as they traced a path down my face, dripping into the fabric of my shawl. In a moment of clarity I wondered what Jungkook must be going through now. Nothing good for sure.

It definitely said something, that I still worried for him. Sighing, I let Jihyun hug me closer. I would take advantage of his kindness for a few more minutes. It had been a while since someone had held me like I mattered.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I called Jungkook that evening.

It wasn’t an easy choice but my heart ached and my mind raced with unanswered questions. I didn’t want to get lost in my own thoughts so I didn’t overthink it. We were still married. I was allowed to call him.

He picked up on the third ring.

“Where are you?” I asked quietly and Jungkook’s groan made my face heat up a little.

“I… Leah?” He sounded groggy. I glanced at the time. It wasn’t late.

“Are you sleeping?”

He didn’t reply for a few minutes.

“I’m sorry about what happened. We.. We didn’t do anything else. It was just.. it was a kiss. Just that.”

“Are you still in the hotel?” I asked quietly ignoring his words.

“ For tonight, yes. Dad wants me to stay with a friend of his. I’ll be going over to their place tomorrow morning.” He replied .

Silence followed for a few seconds.

“Namjoon is moving in tomorrow.” I said stiffly.

Jungkook didn’t respond for a minute or so.

“Yes. Father said it’s a good idea. And I agree. You shouldn’t be alone while I’m here. He’s right. Hyung’s a nice guy. He’ll help you out.” Jungkook said softly.

“Liza came home. She wanted to talk to me.” I said quietly.

Jungkook didn’t reply and I sighed.

“I told her I wasn’t going to talk to her before I talked to you. I don’t… I don’t want to say anything to her that I haven’t already said before. But I still want to know your thoughts on all this. Your plans, that is. I take it you weren’t happy with her ending things.” I said stiltedly.

Jungkook didn’t reply for a few seconds.

“Things between us ended a long time ago, Leah. It was over when we both agreed to marry other people. Maybe even before that, I don’t know… I … I guess I just didn’t want to acknowledge them.” He said quietly. “ She’s different, now. Even that kiss felt so wrong.  She’s moving on. I’m glad in a way. She deserves better than me. She deserves someone like hyung. He’s better than me in everyway and-”

God I wanted to strangle him.

“So why did you kiss her?” I snapped. “ If you’re so generously letting her go why would you…” I stopped.

“I didn’t kiss her. She kissed me. It was barely for a second.” He muttered. “ whoever it was must’ve been videoing us for a while.”

I had to remind myself that in the grand scheme of things, this little detail made no difference.

“Right.” I sighed. “ So, you won’t be home for a while?”

“Six weeks at least.” He said quietly.

I tried to keep the disappointment down. I still wanted to see him, just to make sure he was okay. But I knew that was just the pregnancy hormones talking.

“Okay.” I said simply.

“How are you? Did you go see the doctor?” He asked softly and the question surprised me. I was half sure he had forgotten.

“No, not yet. Maybe in a couple of days.” I scratched at a small stain on my skirt. Lime juice and baking soda, I thought absently. That should get the stain out.  

“Its pretty late. You should go see the doctor, Leah. I.. I looked stuff up. They say you have to be on pre natal vitamins, folic acid and iron supplements  and you have to have  a balanced diet. I called Sana earlier and told her to speak to our doctor and get a diet chart for you. She said she’ll do it soon. So , please take care of yourself.”

Jungkook sounded entirely serious and as always my brain felt muddled, unable to process why he did the things he did. He had looked things up about the pregnancy and that implied some sort of interest, didn’t it? But ….. he had also kissed my sister so what was I supposed to do with this?

“I’ll call you.” I said shakily, drained. I was done for the day.

“Right.” He said softly. “ Namjoon hyung will be there tomorrow right? Should I talk to him? He could take you to the doctor.”

“No.. That’s fine. I’ll manage.” I said quickly.

“You’re sure?” There was genuine worry there.

“Yes.” I sighed.

“Alright.”

Silence again. I exhaled shakily.

“Should I hang up?” I asked quietly.

“Yeah. Good night. ” He breathed.

“Good night, Jungkook.”

Click.

I stared at the wall, gently lowering the phone and placing it on the bed next to me.

She deserves better than me, his voice echoed in my head.

Well, so did I.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Namjoon looked nothing like the twenty one year old college student I’d seen a decade ago. I knew he was a successful novelist and I’d read all his books. They were mostly philosophical or commentaries on life and emotions. I enjoyed the way he wrote : melancholic and deep but also clear and easy to understand. It was like staring at a particularly deep pool, being able to see all the way down to the bottom because of how clean the waters were. But once you put your feet in, the depth  always surprised you.

“That’s a lot of books.” I laughed, gripping the edge of the door frame as I watched him stumble under the weight of a crate full of bound books. Namjoon’s messy brown hair peeked over the top, and when he adjusted the huge load to stare at me, I caught sight of his handsome face stretched in a dimpled grin, eyes glinting.

“Research.” He grunted, straightening himself up and I watched the flex of his muscles as he carefully moved to place the crate down in one corner of the large bedroom that I’d had cleaned for him. It was on the west wing of the house, parallel to my own bedroom that I shared with Jungkook . Namjoon had spent three years working as a professor somewhere in Indonesia. And I knew that he’d spent a year backpacking all over Scandinavia. I stared at his tall strapping figure, watching him set up his writing space carefully, sorting out boxes and electronics.

He had driven here in his Range Rover and I knew all his clothes were still there in the back of the car.

“Should I ask the footmen to get your clothes?” I asked and he glanced up at me, frowning.

“Footmen?” He looked confused and I rolled my eyes.

“Namjoon…” I said chidingly and he grinned again.

“I keep forgetting you’re filthy rich. Makes me wish I should have beaten Jungkook to the game and bagged myself a rich wife.” He winked. It was a joke but there was no mistaking the hint of interest in his eye. Or maybe it was just wishful thinking on my part. Being married to Jungkook had definitely made me question the attraction I held for men so it felt good, having someone as handsome and whole and successful as Namjoon look at me like that.

“I’ll ask them to get your clothes. You should shower and settle in. We’ll meet for dinner tonight.” I said quickly and he nodded.

“You’re going to be okay heading back to your room? Let me know if you need help.” He pointed at my feet and I nodded. It was sweet of him to offer.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Dinner was surprisingly not awkward at all. Namjoon had a lot of interesting stories to share and I found myself clinging to ever word in rapt attention. He spoke about all the folklore he’d run into in different places, how he thought that no matter the culture, there were always some common things you could find in every one of them. He also talked a little about his next book, which he hadn’t named yet.

���It’s about second chances. Forgiving and moving on.” He said, taking another bite of his braised pork and moving to make another lettuce wrap.

“ Heavy stuff.” I said thoughtfully. “ Most of my writing is commercial. I just try to sell stuff to reluctant people. It’s not much but it keeps me occupied and it’s always nice to make money that you can call your own.”

“It’s because you don’t write for yourself. When you start writing for yourself, you can truly be who you are.” He said firmly and I nodded in agreement.

My writing in college had been vivid and bright and filled with life. But after the accident, it had turned grey and gloomy. The words seemed to drip with loss and longing and  I didn’t enjoy it, because it was a reminder that I was no longer the vibrant, attractive fulsome girl I once was.

“Maybe that’s what I’m afraid of.” I smiled. “ Being who I am. I would rather pretend I’m at least a little alright.”

Namjoon stared at me, thoughtful.

“You used to run track.” He said softly and I grinned.

“You remember.” I said, pleased.

“Of course I do and you were captain of the volleyball team as well. You used to organize all those hikes and treks and stuff.”

“Yes I did. I loved the outdoors.” I stared out of the window.

“Loved? Past tense?” He tilted his head. I stared at him, shaking my head.

“What kind of question is that.” I shook my head. “ Look at me. I’m not trekking anytime soon, considering how the last time ended.”

“You can still go out.” He frowned. “ When was the last time you went somewhere?”

I shook my head.

“Oppa…”

“Listen. You know me. You’ve known me for more than a decade. Do you honestly think I’m going to let you rattle around this old house like a ghost when you should be out there taking in all the sunshine you can get?” Namjoon placed his chopsticks down and linked his fingers together, staring at me.

I stared at him, and it was definitely there. The concern, the affection. Not that different from when I was sixteen and struggling to understand what pathos meant.

But now there was a definite undercurrent of attraction. Back then it had been childish, the wild crush of a teenager on her hot tutor but now, now I knew that he was so much more than just a hot guy.

“I’m pregnant.” I said softly, more a reminder to myself than anything else.

Namjoon grinned.

“We’ll steer clear of horse riding and alcohol. Anything else you can just let me know.”

“Are you serious?”

“As a heart attack.”

“I think I’m getting one now.” I deadpanned.

“Because you’re nervous.” He grinned.

“Because your dimples look too adorable.” I retorted.

He laughed.

“I’ll talk to Jihyun and we’ll go see your doctor first. Then we’ll go out and have  a nice picnic.”

“Namjoon, I can’t…”

“You don’t know that.” He said firmly.” You don’t know if you can or can’t because you’ve never tried. Listen I love picnics and I love going out and I want company. I’m agreeing to be stuck with you for a while and the least you can do is  give me company at a picnic. You know how big a loser I’d seem like if I went by myself?”

It was like I was sixteen again getting brow beaten into things by a tutor who just hated the idea of not getting his way. I shook my head fondly.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Fourteen weeks. Three and a half months.

I stared at the ultrasound, feeling a multitude of things, not all of them good. The baby was growing well and I had all my prescriptions filled. Namjoon had offered to come with me but I had refused. It was too intimate and he was still a stranger. I did take a photo of the ultrasound and sent it to Jungkook.

/Jungkook called me back almost at once.

“You went to the doctor?” He asked, sounding a little breathless.

“Were you running?” I asked, surprised.

“Not really. I’m supposed to be meeting one of the vendors for lunch and I thought I could walk to the restaurant but its farther than I thought.” He huffed.

“Everything’s fine. Baby’s due in July.” I said quietly.

“Summer. That’s good.” He replied. “Right?”

I hesitated. What did that mean? What did it matter when the baby would be born?

“Because winter would mean it being too cold . Summer we can take the baby out and stuff without worrying too much.” Jungkook said softly.

Oh.

“How’s work?” I asked awkwardly. The non conversation was getting tedious. There was just so much to talk about and it was obvious that both of us weren’t in the mood to actually ask or answer anything worthwhile.

“Did dad say something?” Jungkook asked quickly and I frowned.

“No. Why?”

“He wants me to join hyung in the corporate office. Leave the smelter units.” Jungkook sounded subdued and upset and I felt sympathy well inside me.

“Join him? As what?” I asked quietly.

“Head of the marketing department. I’ll be reporting to Seokjin hyung.” Jungkook had clearly started walking again, breath coming in little exhales.

“You don’t want it?” I asked confused, not sure if this was a good or bad thing.

“I mean… I have a degree in Business and Finance. Hyung’s the CEO , I was hoping I’d be the CFO.” Jungkook sighed, “ But I suppose I should be grateful he didn’t disown me altogether after what happened earlier.”

I stayed quiet and so did he.

“We need to talk . When you get back. You … I know you don’t like sharing about what you feel but you owe me an explanation.” I said firmly.

“I know. But I meant what I said when I left. I’m going to be there for you and the baby. You’re still my wife. That’s not going to change.”

I ran my fingers over the ultrasound.

“Did you also mean the part where you said you can’t stand me.” I said bitterly .

Jungkook didn’t reply.

“I… You know I didn’t. That was just something I said on impulse. I’m sorry. You’re… You’ve been nothing but good to me. And honestly, just the fact that you’re carrying my child is proof that I can definitely stand you.” He sounded just a little hoarse.

I bit my lips, staring up at the door when I heard a knock.

“Leah? I’m going to have some tea in the garden … You wanna come with?” Namjoon’s voice rang through the room and I froze.

“Oh.. Oh.. yes. I’ll be down.” I said quickly, nodding . Namjoon pointed at the phone and gave to thumbs up before moving back out.

“Was that Namjoon hyung?” Jungkook’s voice came over the line.

“Oh… yeah. Yeah, he’s… he wants me to have tea with him in the gardens.” I said awkwardly.

“That’s nice.  You should go. Get out of the house once in a while.” I didn’t know what to say to that so I stayed quiet.

After another minute or so of silence, Jungkook cleared his throat.

“ I got that form you sent in for me to fill, about my medical history. I’ll fill it up and mail it to the doctor’s office. Is that alright?” He asked hesitantly. “ If not I can fly back home. If they need me in person or something.”

I frowned a bit.

“They don’t need you in person, Jungkook of course not. Mail it, that’s fine.”

Another pause.

“This is really happening huh? A baby. We’re having a baby.” The exhaustion in his voice was palpable and I wondered.

“Yes. We are.” I said simply, not having anything else to elaborate on. It was happening. I was torn between pleasure at having something to look forward to and guilt at forcing Jungkook into a role he wasn’t ready for. But , for better or for worse we were married. The child was his. It would be a Jeon.

“ I’ll do better.” He said quietly. “ With the little one. I’ll be better.”

Tears these days, sprung up out of nowhere I thought miserably, furiously swiping at my face.

“Leah?” His voice came over the line. “ Leah are you there?”

“I need to go.”

“Alright.”

“Take care of yourself too, Jungkook.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Loneliness .

It’s such an odd sort of feeling. Sometimes you get used to it so much, that you forget all about it.

It stays , a part of you that doesn’t make much of an impression on you until one day, suddenly it becomes unbearable,

Until you get a glimpse of what it’s like to not be lonely.

And then suddenly it’s like a deep chasm of longing and desperation just opens up inside you, craving love and warmth and company with a hunger that feels like it can never ever be satisfied.

I’d never paid much mind to the fact that my life revolved around myself, my writing and the flowers in the garden. Not until Namjoon had come, demanding to be felt and seen and heard .

 Namjoon hadn’t joked about not letting me rattle around the house. Our days were spent sprawled on the lawns of the Jeon estate, each of us occupied with our own writing . Namjoon typed away on his laptop while I preferred my leather bound notebook. It was oddly soothing, lying there on the clean cut grass, the sharp blades rubbing against my bare legs, as I leaned back against a tree trunk, watching Namjoon’s furrowed brows as he wrote.

Namjoon had changed in a lot of ways and yet he was still somehow just as I remembered, focused and often lost in his own head. He was a contemplative man and seemed to spend as much time reading as he did writing.

“There’s a poetry club that meets every Tuesday in Gangnam. Would you like to come with me?” He asked casually, about a week after he’d moved in and I considered it. The paparazzi had finally stopped hanging about the estate and Jungkook had called the previous night with a ETA for when he would be back.

Four weeks at most, he had said firmly and I wasn’t sure if I was feeling all that excited for his return anymore. Days spent with Namjoon were more exciting. He included me in every little thing and I was addicted.

Somewhere in the back of my mind, I knew this was probably wrong. Namjoon was sweet and kind but I was still married. But on the wake of that thought came the bitter reminder that there was nothing between Jungkook and I. He was in love with someone else. Why should I deny myself the joy of Namjoon’s company over a relationship that really wasn’t a relationship at all.

Namjoon treated me as an equal, teased and flirted like there was nothing wrong with the two of us living like this, together and away from the rest of the world and I liked it. It made me feel like perhaps happiness wasn’t such an abstract, unreachable thing after all. That perhaps I could find happiness like this. In friendship and mindless conversation with a man who didn’t see me as a burden.

“I’d love that.” I said with a smile, letting my fingers knit together with his.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“Scorned wife getting even? We spotted the recently cheated on Mrs Jeon getting cozy with a strapping, buff hottie in a private restaurant last Friday and we can’t help but wonder if perhaps the reclusive lady is trying to get back at her husband by flashing her own boytoy.” Namjoon read cheerfully from his phone, looking way too entertained as he showed me the zoomed photo of us holding hands over the dinner table .

“That’s quite the description they’ve put for you.” I grimaced, sipping my chamomile tea slowly. My father and Mr. Jeon had reacted with their usual anger, threatening to sue the gossip rag for libel but it was pointless. They would keep being intrusive rats. There was nothing much to be done beyond enduring them.

“My agent’s losing his mind. He’s been at me trying to get me to agree to book signings and public appearances and he’s pissed that this is the way I get introduced to Seoul’s High society. Poor guy.” Namjoon chuckled and I felt guilt churn.

“I’m sorry, Namjoon. I really didn’t think they’d be following me. I mean… usually they’re only tailing Jungkook but I guess with the whole thing with Lisa , they’re just looking for ways to make things worse.” I said hesitantly.

Namjoon hesitated, staring at me for a few seconds.

“We never really talked about how things are.” He said quietly. “ Between you and Jungkook, that is.”

I ran the edge of my chopsticks on the brim of my soup bowl.

“ There’s not much to say. He’s…. He’s still sorting things out. With my sister.” I smiled a little. It ached a lot less, I realized with surprise.

“They loved each other deeply.” Namjoon said softly. “ that sort of thing doesn’t go away that quickly.”

I nodded.

“Of course. And I’ve been …understanding of that. I like to think.”

“But its unfair to you. You deserve to be loved too. Fully and well .”

I leaned back to stare at him.

“Are you offering?” I laughed, teasing.

Namjoon didn’t smile, leaning forward instead.

“Depends. Will you ever consider leaving him, for me?” He said seriously.

My heart turned over inside me.

“Namjoon…” I choked out and he reached out and lightly touched my palm.

“I know how marriages work with people like you, so I think I should draw boundaries now, if I want to keep myself safe.” He smiled a bit.

“I’m pregnant. With his child.” I swallowed and Namjoon’s brows went up.

“I thought it was your child. Yours and no one else’s.”

I felt torn, staring at him and wanting to say that I didn’t consider Jungkook as the child’s father, not in the way most people did. But I also remembered my husbands determined voice, the way he kept insisting that he wouldn’t neglect the child.

“Its not about Jungkook or the child, Leah. Its about you. You married Jungkook knowing he was in love with your sister and that tells me that you listen to your parents. You don’t want to stand up against the rules set by our parents and I don’t fault you for it. But I can’t let myself fall for you, knowing you’re going to be bound by your obligations to yurr family.”

I shook my head.

“Don’t fall in love with me.” I said easily. “ You’re right. My family comes first. And whether I want to be or not, I’m bound to Jungkook for life. So don’t fall in love with me.”

He smiled and nodded.

“Alright then.”

“Do you want to move out?” I asked bitterly and he looked genuinely surprised.

“What?”

“You clearly think I’m trying to seduce you or something when really, I-“

“Hey. Hey, Leah…no. No alright, that’s not what I meant. These two weeks, it was amazing. I love your mind and you’re easily one of my favorite people on this planet. We’re friends. And we’ll stay friends no matter what but you must know why I said what I said. You’re a beautiful woman and I’m a lonely guy.” He smiled a bit, “ I just don’t want to make it hard for myself when you want me to leave.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Jungkook arrived back in Korea on a cold, rainy morning and against my better judgment I let Jihyun and Lisa drag me to the airport. It was some kind of publicity stunt, that much I could fathom but I didn’t know if Jungkook was in on it. I hadn’t spoken to him in a few days, he had been busy wrapping things up with the new branch in Japan.

It was another bad day for my leg and I found myself leaning heavily on my sister, her arm wrapped around my waist as we walked over to the waiting area. I could already identify a few men with cameras staring at us discreetly. Paparazzi . I saw them move their cameras down to the now obvious curve of my stomach and I swallowed. I could already imagine the articles wondering who the father was : Jungkook or Namjoon.

“You alright?” My sister asked worriedly and I nodded, not looking at her. Lisa hadn’t been discouraged by initial refusal to speak to her, keeping at it till I finally caved and let her visit me at the estate. She didn’t love Jungkook anymore, she insisted . It was over. They were over . She wanted to give her marriage a chance. Very sweet and nice, that. And it was obvious that she wasn’t lying, what with the way she and her husband kept

Jihyun and Lisa had made amends with each other and it annoyed me that they seemed to be madly in love with each other all of a sudden. Like the past couple months hadn’t even happened. I stared down at my wedding ring feeling stricken. Was it unfair that I resented them for this? Why hadn’t the two of them thought of this, of breaking things off and moving on before the damn wedding. And then maybe Jungkook and I would have had a real marriage too.

Bitter and hormonal was definitely not a good combination I thought with a wince, fingers splaying on the curve of my lower belly. It was so odd, being pregnant. The extra weight somehow foreign but also …so soothing. The last scan had shown that I had an anterior placenta and that meant that I may not feel movements for a while. I didn’t mind, having found comfort in just tracing my palm over the bare skin of my stomach.

“There he is.” Jihyun’s voice made me look up and ure enough there he was.

It wasn’t the longest we’d been away from each other and yet, I felt my heart leap at the sight of him. He truly was a very handsome man, I thought miserably. And no matter what people said, it was infinitely more difficult to hate your husband when he looked that good.

Jungkook’s eyes caught mine first and I saw the way his gaze dipped straight to the curve of my bump. Even from the ten feet between us , I saw hi lips part in surprise , eyes going wide. It probably hadn’t felt real to him till now, I thought biting my lips as he carefully handed his bags over to the two chauffeurs who had rushed to help him.

Jihyun wasted no time in bounding over and hugging his little brother tight.

I glanced at the man who had been taking photos, pleased to see the surprise in his face. Was he hoping that the CEO would punch his little brother in the face ? Idiots. Lisa stayed by my side and I exhaled shakily.

“ Dad told me something and I want to know if its true.” I said quietly.

She didn’t reply.

I took a deep breath, still watching the two brothers embrace each other, Jungkook’s face buried in Jihyun’s shoulders. I could see him shaking just a little and I felt my gut clench.

“He told me that …that you never told him that you wanted to marry Jungkook. That when he suggested Jihyun you agreed at once.”

She looked away.

“Lets talk about this later.” She said quietly.

“Does Jungkook know?” I demanded. “ Because he spent that first month of our marriage cursing our father out for forcing you to marry Jihyun. Forcing. And dad says that he did no such thing. So what is the truth.”

Lisa didn’t respond.

“Jungkook  knows.” She said finally, “ I told him… the truth. When we were in Japan.” and I laughed in disbelief.

“Was that before or after you kissed him?” I snapped and she looked genuinely pained.

“Leah, I never meant to hurt you or Jungkook.” She said shakily.

“My God.” I shook my head. “ I always knew you were a selfish, greedy person but I didn’t take you for being a liar and a deceitful coward. ”

She stared down at her feet.

“Yes. I’m greedy..”  She whispered “ And you may not understand it now but I did it for you and for Jungkook.”

She moved away and I watched as Jihyun pulled away from Jungkook, still holding his arm as he held a hand out to Lisa. The smile on her face seemed genuine as she took her husband’s hand and I shifted my gaze to mine. Jihyun and Lisa walked away to their car and Jungkook stepped closer to me, his face stoic and impossible to read.  

“Leah.” He said quietly, dark hair falling into even darker eyes.

I didn’t reply, merely stepping up to gently press my palms on either side of his face.

“Welcome back.” I said softly, before reaching up and kissing him full on the lips. Jungkook’s entire body went stiff as a board at the gesture but he didn’t pull away , thankfully. It felt cold and impersonal and barely lasted a few seconds but hopefully the man had gotten a few good shots. I closed my eyes for effect, running my thumb over the clean shaven curve of his jaw, before pulling away slowly.

I peered over Jungkook’s shoulder, just to make sure and sure enough, the man was moving closer to get better angles. I smiled a little. Good. That should hold these vultures off for a while. I turned back to Jungkook and his eyes followed my gaze catching sight of the man with the camera and his entire body seemed to go stiff with anger.

“Why did you do that?” He growled and I bit my lips.

“You know why.” I made to turn away but he gripped my arm, hard. So hard that I winced.

“What are you doing?” I asked panicking, glancing at the man who was still watching.

“Since when did you start pandering to those pigs?” He whispered angrily and I flinched.

“Your father wants to introduce you to the Board of directors this weekend.” I whispered quietly, “Most of them read the news Jungkook. The last news about us can’t be about you cheating on me.”

“That’s my business. And I’ll deal with it. We’re not doing this, Leah. I’m not putting on some kind of act just to please my fucking father.” He looked furious and the taut line of his jaw made me flinch.

“I’m sorry.” I said quickly, guilt churning inside me. He was right. I shouldn’t have done that without talking to him about it but I knew that the scandal with him and Lisa wouldn’t go down well with the Board. And the Board generally had a direct say on who got hired to top managerial positions.

“I just want you to get that job.” I said softly and he stared at me, stiff body relaxing marginally.

“Let’s just go home. Yeah?” Jungkook said tiredly and I bit my lips.

Less than fifteen minutes since he came home and we were already at odds with each other.

The most ill suited couple in the universe, I thought with a grimace as he stepped right next to me and wrapped a hand around my waist.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I had a very terrible tendency to forget taking my pills. So I generally left them by the bedside table. Stepping out of the shower, I found Jungkook sitting on my side of the bed, examining the bottle carefully. I tugged on the white t shirt I had on, suddenly embarrassed because it was Jungkook’s

I’d asked to borrow a couple over the phone,  simply because I no longer fit into my own and the ones I’d ordered weren’t here yet. Jungkook had agreed but still, it felt awkward when he was wearing the exact same t shirt himself.

He turned around when I moved to the vanity to put on moisturizer for the night and through the reflection I saw his gaze linger on my attire.

“Aspirin? Didn’t know that was part of pre natal vitamins?” He said seriously and I blinked., surprised. I turned around to stare at him, licking my lips nervously.

“How much research did you do?” I asked, genuinely curious and he flushed.

“I had a lot of free time. “ He said defensively. “ These six weeks.”

I frowned, before turning back to grab the small pot of night cream from the draw.

“My blood pressure is a little elevated. My mother had pre eclampsia with my sister and they just want to be careful.”

“Pre eclampsia?” Jungkook’s voice was fraught with nervousness and I turned back to see him almost white as a sheet.

“Jungkook…I.. its nothing serious.” I said hastily and his jaw went even more taut.

“What do you mean its not serious? Do you even know what it is?” He demanded.

“Do you?” I snapped back, annoyed at being treated like I was an errant child.

“I know that it’s the leading cause of maternal death during birth.” He all but shouted and I flinched.

“Okay…that’s only in extreme cases.” I held both my hands up. “ it’s a bit too premature to be panicking over that.”

Jungkook opened his mouth, as though to argue but then seemed to calm himself down.

“When’s your next check up?” He asked casually.

“This weekend. But its okay, Namjoon is-“

“I’ll come with you. I.. I want to come with you.” He said quietly.

I stared at him, feeling too awkward to outright refuse.

“You have the meeting with the Board. This weekend.” I said softly.

“So?” Jungkook shrugged. “ I’ll just tell them your appointment and health is more important to me. Besides isn’t that what you wanted? The reason you kissed me at the airport? You want the board to think we’re happily in love. I think that would be an excellent way to show them that. ”

Jungkook stared at me , head tilted curiously, daring me to deny what I had old him myself.

Sighing, I nodded.

“Alright.” I managed a weak smile. “ You can come with me.”

“Namjoon hyung left today, you said?” He asked casually.

I nodded.

“I should send him a bottle of his favorite wine for taking care of you so well. You look good.”

“He did it because he wanted to. Because he enjoyed it.” I retorted, his words rubbing me just a little wrong.

Jungkook smiled although it was more of a smirk.

“I’m sure he did. But I’m here now. And I did promise you that I’ll be there for you.”

“For the baby.” I said sharply, not liking the way he looked. The things he seemed to b implying.” You promised me you’d be there for the baby.”

“And right now, said baby is inside you.” He grinned now and I felt my pulse quicken at the sight. Jungkook didn’t smile with me. It wasn’t something that happened. At all. “ So I’ll have to take care of you.”

I stared at him, biting my lips.

“What are you doing?” I demanded. “My sister told you she never wanted you so now you want to start fucking me again?”

It was cruel. A terrible thing to say and I regretted it at once.

The smile faded.

“What?”

“ I…fuck Jungkook.” I groaned.

“is that what you think of me? Need I remind you that you were the one who came to me all those months ago? I never…. I would never force myself on you, Leah.” He looked like he’d been stabbed and I heart clenched.

“Jungkook , I…”

“I’ve been honest. Through all of this I’ve been honest to you. I lied to your sister, I lied to my father and fuck I even lied to myself. But I’ve been honest with you , Leah.”

“And that’s supposed to make me feel better?!” I cried out, despairing. “ You were in love with my sister and –“

“And she wanted to marry my brother.” Jungkook yelled, standing up and turning to me, eyes blazing. “  All along. Know what she told me Leah? That it was never supposed to be me. That five years of us being together…it was because she was in love with my brother and she couldn’t bear the thought of being alone. She started dating me to make him jealous and when she saw that I spent so much time with Jihyun she stuck around . So she could spend time with him.” He shook his head.

I stared at him, horrified.

“Jungkook….”

“I thought I could never feel more pathetic than when I stood there listening her tel me how she never felt a single thing for me. But wow…. Thank you for proving me wrong. Because right now, standing here begging you to let me a part of the child we both made knowing you only see me as some kind of pervert just looking to get into your bed….” he shook his head,” I feel worse. I feel dirty.”

My throat went dry.

“You know what?” He moved to the closet and to my horror he grabbed a bunch of his clothes and a small suitcase. “ I’m going to go get a Hotel room.”

“What? No… Jungkook, wait!” I rushed to his side, grabbing his arm but he threw my hand off quickly.

“Ask Namjoon hyung to move back in. Better yet, tell dad the truth. That you think I’m disgusting. That the thought of me being in your life makes you sick. Tell him you want a divorce and-“

“It’s a girl.” I exhaled sharply.

Jungkook went completely still.

I swallowed, my heart racing so fast I couldn’t catch my breath.

I took a deep breath and moved to lightly touch his back, fingers splaying on the broad expanse of his shoulder blade .

He turned around at that and my heart lurched at the tear tracks down his cheeks. He looked wrecked.

“ A girl?” He whispered.

I bit my lips, nodding.

“We’re having a little girl.” He looked a little shell shocked.

“Yes. And hopefully, she isn’t as dramatic as her father.” I said softly, grabbing the dozen or so t shirts he’d pulled out of the closet and pushing them back into the shelves.

Jungkook didn’t protest, still staring into space, probably just taking the news in. I felt awful for one second because I hadn’t even cared all that much when the technician had told me.

I closed the closet door and moved back to the vanity trying to process all that had been said in the last five minutes, only to feel a headache come on. I would think about it tomorrow.

I finished braiding my hair when Jungkook’s voice came from the bed.

“If you don’t want me to intrude into your space you can tell me. I’m okay with only getting information about the baby.” He said quietly.

I stared at myself in the mirror.

I turned to him slowly. i took a deep breath, considered that what i was going to say would likely change everything between us. But i had to. 

I’ve always been honest with you Leah, He had said and I decided that perhaps he deserved some honesty in return.

“I think I’m in love with Namjoon.” 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Author’s Note : these two are such a mess istg. 

ooh i don’t have a taglist for this so please comment if you wanna be on it. 

[33roda]

Kaeya X Dom!Reader <3

tags: tiddy sucking (m!receiving), butt fingering, (m!receiving), brat taming kinda, gn!reader I think !!

____________________________________

Yet another exhausting Abyss Order attack, finally over with.

It was a quite difficult one at that, having required a whole army of knights at the gates of Mondstadt, so Kaeya invited the team to a drink at Angel's Share, out of all places. Even after all the energy that used up, he's still in the mood for drinks?

Well, that didn't matter anyway, because either way, you would've been forced to go either by Kaeya or by Lisa. You sat quietly next to Kaeya, listening to him chat with the other knights.

"Ah, another success.. Of course, we couldn't have done it without our Honorary Knight here," he chatted, sounding as sarcastic as ever. "You truly are a new storm after all."

He rested his hand on your shoulder while holding up his third glass of sparkling wine of the night, chuckling at how Amber was already tipsy after one sip of beer. Jean held her up, furrowing her eyebrows tightly, looking for where Lisa went. Probably off to flirt with the new naive bartender. Everyone's enjoying their time here while she had to babysit Amber and Lisa?

"Of course, Y/N. It is truly an honor to celebrate this with our new Honorary Knight." she stumbled as she continued holding up Amber and wiping her drool with napkins, her slurring drowned out by the noises in the background. You let out a polite smile, showing your appreciation to everyone on the table.

"Thank you, Grand Master. It was a pleasure working with you today." The table was awkward. Too formal, too stiff, but Kaeya didn't seem to mind it, just smirking and slowly sipping on his wine. You almost started wondering and fantasizing about when it'd be time to leave, but as soon as you thought of that, you felt Kaeya's hand slide off your shoulder and started gently caressing your thighs. Ah, expected. Of course there had to be an ulterior motive to his invitation, not that you minded. Taking advantage of the loud, distracting chatter in the background, he ducked his head next to your ear just enough so you could feel his hot breath against it.

"You sure look bored, Y/N. Quite rude of you to not respect etiquette," he whispered against your ear and chuckled. "I have something more fun for you later. Meet me outside the bar once the rest leave."

Ha. Finally, something interesting this night. You had nothing to lose anyway, so why not entertain his request? his actions motivating you to just get the night over with, you try to be more friendly with Jean to lessen the tenseness in the air, her unaware of the touching and groping exchanged between you and Kaeya underneath the table.

Lisa would never seem to return, and Jean eventually got tired of the Outrider hiccuping and slurring on her words next to her, deciding it was best for everyone to just go home. Exchanging goodbyes to everyone, Kaeya escorted them outside, looking back and shooting you a wink and a smug smile before leaving the tavern. Oh what you'd do to wipe that smug smile off his face, and you'd be sure to do just that tonight. You started packing up your stuff, taking your sweet time with it, thinking about how you're keeping The Cavalry Captain waiting. You can already picture how he'll be squirming and begging to be touched.. What a pretty sight, you thought, as you exit the tavern door to be greeted with silence for a second; then the husky voice of a grumpy-looking Kaeya.

"Took ya long enough, Honorary Knight," he raised an eyebrow, waiting for an excuse or an apology, getting a figurative slap in the face when he got teasing instead.

"Oh, so sorry, Captain, did my touch make you so needy in there you couldn't wait for a few minutes?," you cooed, giving him as much of a smug smile as he was giving you earlier.

"Hm," he scoffed. Resistance? from a new knight like you? that's new. He was known to be irresistible, to both men and women, being all dolled up with his fancy fur and chains. At least he still has you in his hands, he thought.

Thank Barbatos the streets were empty ‒ if anyone saw you leading the Captain to your house in the dead of the night, the rumours would not sound pretty for either of you. But rumours were the least of your concerns, being in your room with Kaeya holding you against the wall and leaning down to whisper in your ear as you twirled his ponytail in your fingers from behind.

"Getting you here was easier than expected, Y/N," he taunted, "I'm starting to think you've wanted this for some time."

"In your dreams," you looked up at him. To be honest, he was a very attractive man - looking down at you with half lidded eyes and that smirk that never seemed to fade. He shot down to kiss you, but it was too early, you thought. He had to earn it. You grabbed his ponytail, forcing him to throw his head back and expose his pretty little neck to you. His eyes going wide as you started tracing circles on his exposed chest - now that was a sight to appreciate. Funny, he's the captain yet his skin felt smooth and silky against your calloused hands.. now you understand why he liked showing it off so bad. Switching hands to grab him by the face, you snickered, "It seems like you've been the one planning this, Sir Kaeya. Actually, how about you let me be your master tonight, hm?"

"You think it's that easy? Insulting of you, Y/N," you raised an eyebrow at the disobedience, even with your hands grabbing his cheeks, his words coming out slurred. Should've expected that from a smug fuck like Kaeya. "Prove yourself to me."

"You really are a brat. Not surprised, honey." you said, letting go of his cheeks and immediately diving into his chest to lick and suck at it, leaving it with red and purple bruises. Sliding your fingers across his wet chest and under his shirt, you flicked his nipple with your thumb before squeezing it, feeling him shudder standing in front of you. "What's wrong? can't handle it? need to lay down?" you didn't even let him finish before shoving him down into the bed, impressing him with your sudden strength. Giggling, you pinned his wrists down next to his head. "Just let me have my fun with those pretty tits of yours." Surprisingly, he didn't complain - instead, he just bit his lip and turned his head to the side, allowing himself to be touched. "Such a good boy, really,"

"Th-this is just a one time thing, Y/N, don't get your hopes up," he stuttered out between little gasps and squirms, "I promise you, I'll be stuffing you full tonigh- ngh!" he choked, feeling you move his shirt to the side and start lapping at his nipple. If he wasn't hard before, he sure as hell is now. Riling him up was easier than expected - although he'd never admit that. You continued nibbling at him, feeling his hardness underneath his pants on your stomach. Poor Kaeya, getting hard just from this?

"Sensitive, are we?" you commented between licks. "No wonder you love showing off your chest so much. Makes me think how you'd like showing the rest of you off?"

"You'd love to see that, huh?" he remained smug.

"Why yes, I would, Captain," you purred. You started unbuckling his belt and stripping him all the way down to his underwear, leaving so much more area for you to lick, kiss, and just ruin. "Such a pillow princess. Are you like this with everyone else?"

"N-no!" he exclaimed, looking insulted. "Just strip me already, Y/N." Honestly, it was pretty funny how he tried to mask his horniness, even with his dick as hard as ever under you, face flushed and breathing heavily.

"I'm not stripping you unless you call me your master. And if you strip yourself," you held up his chin with your fingers, "I'll just leave you here, naked and horny, with no pleasure at all. Your choice, Kaeya."

"Master.. please, please strip me - I need more, anything, please," he sounded like he was about to cry. How adorable, his pride crumbling right before him, all just so he could have your touch..

"Good boy."

You pulled down his tight blue underwear down to his ankles, freeing his oh-so-pretty cock. He was certainly impressive, but unfortunately, his dick would be useless to you tonight. "How pretty," you hummed, tracing every vein with your fingers, feeling every throb. "You want more, don't you? I want to hear you beg for more."

"More, please, I n-need you to touch me master, please," gasping, he tried rutting against your hand, rubbing himself on you, anything - but failing. "I want it so bad,"

Having the Cavalry Captain being your little bitch wasn't so bad after all. Laughing at his little whines and pathetic attempts to get off on your hand, you grabbed him and started pumping gently, watching his reactions in pure amusement. His usually striking eyes shut closed, eyebrows tight, his mouth wide open - it was all a sight to behold. Groans and whimpers filling the room, he continued trying to thrust harder into your hand, chasing his release. But baby, he had no idea the plan was entirely different than he thought.

He really thought it was just a bit of teasing, then you'd make him cum with your hands, or fuck you tight. But you stopped pumping him, leaving him whining and begging for more, a look of pitiful disappointment on his face. It almost made you feel bad.

"It's not gonna be that easy, pretty boy," you slapped his thighs, "legs up for me baby."

"H-huh?" he looked genuinely confused, still in a daze from the sudden disappearance of your hand on his cock. Not letting him waste any time, you lifted his legs all the way up by yourself.

"Can't even take orders?" you smacked his ass, making it jiggle and let out that filthy noise. You were impressed how loud it was, honestly. "What would the other knights think seeing you like this, Kaeya? maybe you want them to hear you get fucked? see you all spread out for your master?" Not even giving him a chance to respond, you shoved your fingers in his mouth, he could only hum little "mmphs" and nods in your direction. "I never knew our Captain would be such a slut," you watched in amusement as he coated your fingers in drool, looking up at you in desperation. "I'll give you exactly what you want." smiling at him, you rubbed your saliva-coated fingers against his hole for a few seconds before shoving a finger in to prep him. He wanted more, evidently, by the way he kept humping down against your finger with hesitant moans.

"Y-You're doing it all wrong," he slipped off your fingers with heavy breaths, "let me show you how it's done, master," You raised an eyebrow, and as soon as you were gonna grab him by his throat and punish him, he spread himself out even further with his hands, looking to get a reaction out of you. It was his first time doing this with someone else, but he's definitely fucked himself in front of a mirror before. Who wouldn't love to watch his body like that, anyway?

Shoving two fingers inside himself, he started looking for his spot, erratically humping the air looking for more stimulation, anything; but the most you'd do is stroke his thighs with a smile on your face, teasing him even further. He was obviously just trying to put on a show for you, make you watch him stretch himself out and look at him make the most erotic faces for you - he'd even make sure the whole of Mondstadt heard him get fucked, as if he wasn't gonna wear your hickeys like an award in front of the other knights tomorrow. Watching him fuck in and out of himself, listening to the filthy noises his ass made; you couldn't help but cross your legs a little. "Do you like it, master?" he whimpered.

"I know what you're doing, prince," you answered, "trying so hard to get more.. such a desperate bitch, don't you think?" he nodded in agreement. "Well, since you've been so good.." turning him over, you pushed his face down into the bed. He was already arching his back for you - his pretty hole all wet and ready to get fucked. "You'll still have to work for it, though," you laughed, hearing him groan in protest into the bed. Gently pushing your digits into him, you ordered, "Fuck yourself on my fingers, Kaeya."

Immediately obeying, he pushed himself back onto your fingers, dick flailing under him, sobbing and begging for you to just fuck him yourself - maybe if he obeyed for a little, you'd finally do it? "Such a good boy. And to think you wanted to fuck me?"

You wouldn't let go until you found his spot, curving your fingers towards his navel, making his legs give out from all the pleasure - the Captain was simply a doll in your hands to play with. Even when his legs gave out, only then would you finally fuck him yourself, his tears staining your bed alongside his cum. Fucking his spot even when your arms got tired, you had to make him cum again. His moans getting more and more high-pitched with every fuck into him, squirming and grinding his ass against you, he finally came again with a throaty moan filling the room. You pulled out of him and gave his ass a quick smack, letting him take his breath before turning over to face you. His cum all over his stomach and chest was a sight to remember, dick twitching, his face blushy and pretty lips open gasping.

Sliding your fingers across his chest, you picked up some of his cum and put it near his mouth, waiting for him to put his tongue out to lick it. He did just that, making eye contact with you, and even holding your wrist in place so he could lick it all up. "Good puppy."

He'll definitely be limping around the other knights tomorrow.. Not that he minded. He'll absolutely be teasing you again at the Knights of Favonious headquarters, anyway.

[aquanova99]

Playing with Fire (Demetri x Reader)

Part 3

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A/N: wow two fics in one night who would have thought. Not me. Sorry if this one is a little short.

A/N: thank you to everyone reading this new series I’m getting so soft for Dem lately. As always requests are open and if you like please reblog 💛

┏━•❃°•°❀°•°❃•━┓

Any conversation between you and Demetri was interrupted by your phone going off again. You sighed. You debated answering but Sam wouldn’t call again unless it was an emergency.

“I’m sorry. Just one second.”

“Take your time cara, we do have forever.” God, was he cocky. You didn’t deny that it was endearing. His kind of confidence was attractive.

“Hey Sam. Is ever—”

“Y/n, we saw one of them.”

“A vampire? Yeah, my imprint is—”

“No, y/n. One of the Cullens is back. Jacob went after them, we think it was Bella. Be careful. Some of us are already heading your way.” He hung up right after that. You heard Demetri growl next to you. You were frozen. Demetri was included in the treaty, and what if Bella wanted to fight you? There were too many variables at play.

“Demetri you need to go. Now.”

“Not a chance. If Bella gets here and uses her shield I wont be able to find you.”

“Yeah you said something about that earlier, what do you mean you wont be able to find me?”

“The Cullens aren’t the only gifted vampires, sweetness. I’m able to find anyone I’ve ever met at any time. Or anyone they’ve met as well.”

“Except Bella?”

“And anyone she’s shielding. We’ve been trying to find the Cullens for months to ensure they aren’t planning an attack on our home. With Bella, theres been nothing.”

“And her daughter?”

“She took it hard at first, but shes been enjoying playing princess of the castle after we got back from the amazon.”

“There’s a lot more questions I have but not important right now. Can you track anyone else? Any other Cullen?”

He began to concentrate, his face scrunching “All of the Cullens are up in Alaska right now. It must be just her.”

“It is.” Bella appeared at your doorway. Before you could react Demtri pushed you behind him.

“What do you want Bella?” He hissed at her

“Relax. I just want to go back with you to Italy. Please.”

“And why should I believe you.” He asked

“Look, Edward is trying to round up the witnesses again to storm the castle. He had told me we would go to Volterra and figure everything out so we could be with Renesme. But he lied. He’s more focused on revenge. I just— I want my daughter.”

“Jacob said you basically gave her up, that you would rather stay with Edward.” You weren’t really that surprised, Jacob had become unhinged. Still the question escaped your lips

“W-what? No. I just didn’t want her to get hurt. I told Edward and Jacob there we needed to think about her first. I would never—”

“Bella.” You stepped out from behind Demetri, “I believe you.”

“You do?”

“Yes, and I’m sorry I couldn’t testify but… well you know why I couldn’t. Right now both of you need to go.”

“I’m not leaving you again cara.”

“You don’t understand. Jacob is furious with me. With all of us. If he finds out you’re here and aren’t planning on bringing her back… he’ll try and hurt you. He’s been trying to pick fights since everything went down.” You felt Demetri tense at this.

“Will you come with me? To Volterra? I can protect you there.” You desperately wanted to go, there wasn’t really anything holding you back. Well, the pack had grown close to you but you also knew how they felt about imprints. Up until recently, you’d been alone pretty much your whole life. Going with Demetri, living in a palace, it all seemed too good to be true.

You didn’t get a chance to answer. Jacob burst through the door. God we really needed to take this outside.

“You!” he growled at Bella

“Jake, calm down. Let me explain.”

“Unless you’re here to tell me Ness is back. I don’t want to hear it. You let them take her.”

“Shes not your object, shes my baby! I wanted to make sure she would be okay until I figured out how to be with her. I didn’t want any unnecessary deaths. You should understand that!”

“Shes mine! She was born to be mine. Shes my IMPRINT!”

“Jacob relax. And Get out of my house.” You warned

“Of course you’d side with her! Stay out of this for once. Dracula over there is lucky I haven’t torn him to shreds yet!”

“Bella. I’ll deal with Jacob. You two go to Italy.”

“No.” Demetri said, “Bella, go and tell Aro what you’ve told me. I hope he believes you but that’s the only way to see renesme. Shes fine. I’m not leaving you.”

“You’re not going anywhere Bella.”

Bella turned to look at you, you nodded at her and she ran through the side of your house. Well, now you definitely had a reason to leave. Jacob began running after her, but you jumped and tackled him on his side. You needed to give Bella as big of a headstart as you could. Hopefully, the pack would be here soon. You could stall, but beating Jacob was another issue.

The two of you faced off, “Hey.” You turned to talk to Demetri. “Don’t interfere, okay?”

His lips formed a tight line but he nodded. You turned to look back at Jacob who was now furious. He began phasing and you did the same. Jacob lunged first but you were faster. You knew you wouldn’t last long, the adrenaline would wear off soon and fatigue would take its place. The two of you were snarling at eachother, when you finally collided you felt Jacob sink his teeth into your neck. You heard a whine escape your mouth as he threw you to the ground. You got back up, you were going to have to outrun him. You saw Demetri take a few steps forward but you shook your head at him. The thought of him even coming near Jacob began making your heart race. You didn’t have to worry for long, both of your heads snapped at the howl coming from a distance. Sam. God you were really running up a tab on how much you owed him. The rest of the wolves began flocking to your sides. Jacob couldn’t beat everyone. He bared his teeth at you one more time before running off.

��You good?’ Paul asked

‘Yeah. I need a nap though’

‘Duh,’ Quil joked, you laughed at this and went behind your house to get your backup set of clothes. The wolves agreed to let you actually get to know Demetri. When they said they would try and keep Jacob away you were able to relax for a bit. You weren’t expecting to get scolded the second you stepped back into your now very broken house. Demetri’s eyes were pitch black as he began yelling at you.

“Do not EVER do that to me again. I was seconds from snapping that dogs neck.” If you were worried about him while you were fighting, you couldn’t imagine what it was like on the other side of things.

“I’m sorry, you’re right. I shouldn’t have been so reckless. But can you please yell at me tomorrow, after I sleep. I’m exhausted.”

His gaze softened, “I’m sorry, I just worry. I don’t want to lose you. Can we go somewhere where he won’t bother you?”

“I guess we probably should. I don’t think this place is safe for you.”

“We could go to my home.” He offered again

“Demetri, you have no idea how much I want to go. But, I’m not technically an immortal. I don’t even know if you can change me, or if the venom will kill me. I’d be walking in quite possibly the most dangerous place for me. The others wont like my smell—”

“No one would dare touch you. We can figure out the rest. I promise” The worst part is that you believed every word. You knew it was dangerous and you didn’t care. You just wanted to follow him.

“Okay, youre driving though.”

“Of course.” He was suddenly next to the passenger door and held it open.

“Wow, such a gentleman.” You teased

“I have my moments.” He winked at you. As the two of you drove off you saw concern etch his face.

“Is everything okay?”

“Yes, I was just thinking about what you were saying earlier. Have you really been getting into fights with that guy.”

Attentive, you thought, “Hes tried a few times. I’ve gotten really lucky that the rest of the pack has had y back recently.”

“You realize if I ever see him again and hes not on the reservation I wont hesitate to end him.”

“No, Demetri please. He’s not worth it and I don’t want you getting killed.”

“Oh darling, I’d love to see him try.”

Taglist: @adaydreamaway08 @artaxerxesthegreat @aunt-pipie @avyannadawn @imtoanonymousforyou @lacychick @minghao3o @raindancer2004 @quarthly @venusdelaroix @volturiwolf

[buckyownsmylife]

Young and Beautiful - Steve Rogers smut

The one where you were supposed to be a one-night stand, but Steve won't let that happen

Warnings: smut, and a little bit of angst.

A/N: this was our first ever patreon-voted fic, chosen for the month of May! My patreons at the $3 tier get to send me their ideas once a month and two of them end up being voted so I can write one of them each month. June’s fic is the one where Ransom needs to get a sugar mommy, and if you want to suggest a story for our July’s fic, please consider becoming a patreon! Thank you to my darling @sweetkingdomstarlight-blog​ for reading this over for me.

Y/N’s P.O.V.

The first time wasn’t a mistake, I could admit to that. Steve had been coming to the same bar where I worked for almost a year now. I knew who he was, of course. Everyone knew - he was hard to miss. But I think what he liked about our run-down place is that no one seemed to care about Captain America and the things he did when he didn’t have a bottle of beer in his hand.

Over here, he was just Steve. And Steve tipped well and drank a lot - I was sure he couldn’t get drunk, no matter how many beers I served him, but he never stopped asking me for more.

So, needless to say, he was adored. Adored by my boss, who was always around to keep watch of his customers and keep them in line. Adored by Luke, who guarded the entrance, for all the nights Steve helped him get rid of men who couldn’t keep their hands to themselves. And adored by all the waitresses, for precisely the same reason - and because I always shared my tips with all of them.

Even the kitchen staff adored Steve. Besides, it’s not like he was hard on the eye - all the girls (customers and staff) were constantly fawning over him, but he was nothing short of a gentleman, always.

Actually, he seemed to avoid the members of the opposite sex as best as he could, clearly not interested in whatever it was that they planned to possibly get to do with him. Well, except for me.

He never avoided me. I always figured it was because I was the guardian of the alcohol - we’d even joke about it sometimes, when he came to sit by the bar after politely declining someone’s advances.

“It’s just hard to understand how to date nowadays,” he commented one day after a pretty girl actually asked him out on a date right in front of me, but he refused. I shrugged as I wiped the counter, thinking if there was any advice I could give him.

“It really isn’t that hard. You go out to dinner, walk her home and when you step in front of her door, you ask her for some coffee. She’ll usually do it herself, but if you want to show your interest…” His frown was amusing, to say the least, but I held back my laughter so he wouldn’t be even more uncomfortable.

“A coffee?” Giggling, I nodded. “Before bed? But…”

“It’s a metaphor, Steve. A lady can’t very well invite you into her sheets, now can she?” He blushed three different shades of red when I winked, another giggle escaping. “I mean, she can, but we like to keep some things unsaid - innuendos can be very sexy.”

Two months had passed and if Steve made use of my lessons, I wouldn’t know. He never brought anyone to the bar and never left with any lady who approached him either.

“What can I get ya, Steve?” I’d always ask. I’d never once called him Cap or anything other than the name he used to introduce himself - even though I obviously knew who he was. He always took his time before answering my questions, even if they required a simple yes or no, which amused me to no end.

For a while, I actually believed a gun or one of the buildings the Hulk had undoubtedly thrown in his direction had left him with a difficulty of hearing. But then after my first question, he never seemed to have any problem understanding me at all.

“Just a beer,” he’d say, a small, soft smile as he tried not to stare too much at me, fingers tapping on the counter while I got his order. I appreciated his effort not to make me uncomfortable - I knew he’d seen how often men did that to me. I had no doubt that was why he only ever looked me in the eye from under those huge eyelashes of his.

“There you go.” Always the same routine, we never once deviated from it. Until one night when I was supposed to close the bar and he heard my boss instructing me to be careful.

“There’s been a lot of robberies this late at night. Make sure you lock everything up properly.” I saluted in jest, making the old man laugh and shake his head at me. “See you tomorrow, kid.”

There were only a handful of customers - Steve included, and he was the only one by the bar, so I threw him a quick smile as I wiped the glasses and started to clean the counter.

“Can I get you anything else?” I offered, but he only grimaced in response, leaving me confused. “Is there something wrong?” He stared directly at me without answering for a while before he was able to snap out of whatever it was that had frozen him.

“You’re supposed to leave by yourself at two in the morning?” I chuckled lightly at his concern, avoiding his gaze so he wouldn’t see how it warmed my heart that he’d be preoccupied over me, someone that was a little more than a stranger to him.

“It’s part of the job,” I reassured him. “Well, usually it’s part of Luke’s job. But whenever he has to leave early, it’s my duty to fill in for him.” He nodded, but didn’t make any movement towards leaving. Usually, he would be gone by now, but it wasn’t that extraordinary for him to stay until the hour I left.

This was the first time he stayed this long though, considering I wasn’t the one responsible for closing the bar and I only realized it when I looked around and noticed we were the last two people left in the room.

“Planning on drinking much more?” I joked, trying to gauge if he was going to be much longer, but he seemed startled by my question, looking around to verify the same thing I’d just noticed.

“Oh, no. Not at all.” I smiled, thankful that he was conscious and wouldn’t force me to stay even longer after my shift had finished. “I just figured I could walk you home. It is pretty late, after all.”

My heart warmed up at how sweet and thoughtful this man was. He had no reason to wait for me to finish my job just to walk me home, yet here he was. “Thank you, Steve,” I acknowledged, sending him a grateful grin. “Let me just check the bathrooms real quick. I’ll grab my purse and we can leave.”

He nodded, watching me do as I said and in no time at all we took off together in the direction of my apartment. I wasn’t worried about making small talk with him on the way there - I knew he was a good conversationalist from all the times he had stayed by the bar instead of taking his beer to a table, and I adored the stories he told of his missions just as much as I appreciated how he genuinely cared about what I had to say.

The walk to my place seemed shorter than ever before, and in a few minutes we were standing in front of my door as I searched for my keys in my bag.

“C-Can I…” He murmured as I looked for it, glancing up at him and smiling to signal he should continue even though I couldn’t give him my full attention at that moment. “Would you… Do you have some coffee?”

I was so shocked that my head whipped up to stare at him, eyes wide and unbelieving. Did Steve… Did he… Did he want to have sex with me? “I mean… in your apartment, do you have some coffee in your apartment?”

The thought was so extraordinary that the second I realized his intentions, a fire of desire warmed my lower belly, not because he was Captain America, but because he was an attractive and sweet guy that was way out of my league and I couldn’t believe he was into me.

He kept talking as I kept blinking at him, trying to process what was going on. “’Cause I’d really like to have some coffee… with you… If you want some too…”

His voice got smaller the longer it took for me to answer him, until it disappeared completely and he cleared his throat. “Nevermind.” He was about to turn around and make a run for it, I was sure, but I was able to grasp his wrist just in time, signalling him to stop because I had something to say.

“I would love to make you some coffee, Steve.”

So yeah, the first time wasn’t a mistake. He was way too fucking sweet and I got hot just by seeing how nervous he was to ask me for some “coffee”, incredulous that I was capable of affecting this giant man that much.

So as soon as we were in my apartment, I tied up my hair with the little hair tie I always kept on my wrist during work and got on my knees for him.

And I cherished every fucking second of it.

The way his mouth fell open in a gasp when I reached for his jeans, the little moans he let out as I licked his member… I couldn’t close my eyes, too transfixed by his expressions to miss anything.

The way he pulled me by my hair to devour my mouth, hands so eager to undress me that he ended up ripping my blouse, but it only made me giggle.

The way his groan sounded almost painful when he picked me up, shoved me against the door and penetrated me, filling me so beautifully I hit my head back against the wood and didn’t even notice it.

He got me to cum without almost no preparation, just from the thrill of it all, the stretch of his member inside of me. When I urged him to cum in my pussy, the look on his eyes was enough to get me to cum again, milking him dry as he emptied himself with a growl, forehead dropping against mine while he tried to catch his breath.

I was expecting him to leave immediately or maybe stay for an actual coffee. I wasn’t expecting him to pull out, drop to his knees and start lapping his cum from inside of me, eyes as focused on mine as I had been for him only minutes before.

Burying my fingers in his short locks, I tried to keep myself up despite the way my legs trembled, but Steve just adjusted them so they’d be over his shoulders and held me up with his face buried in me.

I had never cum so many times in a row. But then again, I had never had a man eat his own cum out of me.

I fully intended it to be a one time thing, and that was my plan. I thanked him for eating me out, made him some coffee, giggled at his stories about his friends and for a second it almost looked like we were back at the bar, only the counter was my kitchen table and I was allowed to sit on the other side.

He didn’t ask to stay the evening and I breathed a sigh of relief after I closed the door behind him, ignoring the slight empty feeling that momentarily hit me. This is what I wanted, I reminded myself, and by acting the way I expected him to, he had made it clear that he understood the rules of the dating world he claimed to know so little of.

This was a one time deal. Nothing more.

But then the first night we saw each other at the bar again, it was when he burst through the door to punch some guy who came in just as I was closing, trying to steal the money we had in the vault. I was so fucking relieved to see his face that all I could do was tremble in his arms after the police came to get the robber, and of course I couldn’t let him go after that.

He walked me home and I didn’t even ask anything, just stood on my tiptoes to kiss his lips, using my grip on his shirt to pull him in as he helped me with my clothes.

“You’re so fucking pretty…” He moaned, and perhaps that should have been my first sign, the one that alerted me to stop what I was doing and not make this into a mistake I couldn’t take back.

He hadn’t talked the last time. He had never complimented me before.

“God, your ass…” He groaned as he palmed it, helping me over his lap when he took a seat on my couch, until I could fuse the both of us and ride us to hysteria.

But I didn’t mind. I didn’t mind because it felt so fucking good to be desired by him, to have him inside of me, cumming deep into my pussy only to eat it all out of me again.

It didn’t take long for me to learn about the errors of my way, though. In fact, it started the very next day, when he walked into the bar grinning from ear to ear and made a beeline in my direction.

“Hey, baby,” he greeted, and my eyes went wide as two saucers, especially when I saw him lean over the counter like he intended to peck my lips.

“Hello, Captain.” I quickly turned my back to him, facing the shelves of liquor to pretend that I was looking for something. My heart sank to my stomach as I took in what was happening, what I had just done in my effort to put some distance between us as if last night had never happened. “Can I get you anything?”

The time it took for him to answer almost had me looking at him from over my shoulder, but I restrained myself. “Yeah, you,” he finally said, and I breathed out in surprise. “Why are you acting this way?”

I panicked for a few seconds, reaching up for an already clean glass to attack it with my rag. “I don’t know what you’re talking about,” I tried to reassure the both of us, still incapable of looking him in the eye.

But I could see his massive body by the end of the counter from the corner of my eyes, where he always sat, and I saw him tap the old battered wood with his fingers - fingers he had used to spread me open for his tongue to reach - as he thought.

I hoped he would let it go. I hoped he would not.

“Fine,” he relented, and I froze, uncertain of what he meant. “I’ll come back tomorrow.” My head snapped up just in time to watch him leave, and he didn’t even look over his shoulder.

I tried to tell myself it was for the best. He needed some time to get over whatever the hell it was that he thought he was feeling and tomorrow things would go back to normal. But that wasn’t what happened.

He came back with flowers the next day, and I didn’t have any reasonable excuse not to accept it. He didn’t push for anything, just gave me the bouquet before asking for his usual drink. And then he proceeded to stay the entire evening right there, where he always sat, carefully watching my every move.

For the first time in a while, I broke two glasses in a single evening.

The day after that, he came with a box of chocolates. I couldn’t hide the smile because they were my favorite - I didn’t know how he knew it until he reminded me.

“You told me you liked them right when I started coming to this place.” His eyes were so heavy with a sad feeling that I couldn’t recognize that I had to avert my gaze. It messed with my heartbeat, it left my throat feeling dry.

“Thanks, Captain,” I softly acknowledged it, and I saw the way his grip on the box tightened. I saw it in the way it was slightly crumpled when I took it from his hands, but he didn’t say a word.

There was only so much that he could take, though. And I knew that. It didn’t help that my boss had caught onto his intentions and started to push me to go out on a date with him.

“Why don’t you give the poor guy a chance?” He’d incite, much to Steve’s utter glee.

“Yeah, Y/N. Why don’t you go out with me?” Steve urged, and although he never asked when my boss wasn’t around to initiate the teasing, I knew he wondered.

And the truth was that I wondered about it too. Because everything was screwed up now. When I gave him his beer and our fingers brushed, mine were left tingling. When I looked his way to find his gaze already on me, I shivered.

So yes, the second time was undeniably a mistake, but there wouldn’t be a third time. I’d make sure of it.

Steve’s P.O.V.

I was tired of waiting. I knew I had wanted her since the first time I laid my eyes on her, when I decided to stop at this rundown bar in the hopes of one night of crappy beer without being bothered by anyone asking for autographs or pictures.

I’d come here almost every night when I could escape the tower to watch her work, slowly getting her to warm up to me, and I fell for her personality in the process.

The way she clearly saw me as Steve, and not my title.

The way she always laughed at my stories and shared what had happened in the previous nights with the raucous customers.

The way she seemed to care about everyone and everything that came into contact with her.

So what started as desire became something deeper and for the first time since I was unfrozen, I found myself eager to understand what dating in this new century was like. I asked Sam for advice, and even Tony for any tips he could give me, but their general ideas didn’t matter to me when all I wanted was one single person.

Her.

So I asked her for her thoughts on the matter and was surprised with myself when I put them into practice. I was even more surprised when she accepted my advances and welcomed me into her embrace.

I was sure I’d never been happier than that evening.

But to have her pretend nothing had happened and even worse - treat me like a stranger after I had learned the taste of her skin? Nothing hurt deeper than that.

And still, I understood. I realized then that she hadn’t seen the situation the way that I had. She had thought all I wanted was a one-night deal - well, two-night deal - because I had never shown her anything to make her think differently.

So I set out to do just that. My way this time. And I was just about ready to ask her on a proper date when I was forced away for a whole damn month, having to resort to my hand and my memories of her body to get through the cold nights on the field.

The second I was back in the city, I only had one thing in mind. To get what I wanted, in whatever way she would let me.

“Can we talk?” My voice sounded clipped to my own ears, and maybe that’s why her mouth opened in surprise - or maybe it was seeing me at the bar so early, when there was barely anyone around, after being absent for so long.

“Sure,” she finally accepted, shrugging like it was no big deal, but I knew better than that. She might not know it, but I could read her perfectly, and I knew she was hiding her true feelings even to herself. I knew those feelings were deeper than she had ever felt. I knew they made her scared.

“Not here.” She stopped cleaning glasses then, frozen for a second before she looked around, taking in the fact that no one else was going to need her for a while. There was nowhere to run and maybe I was a jerk for doing this during her work hours, but I was a desperate jerk and I couldn’t wait a second longer.

“Okay.” She sounded small, and I knew what she was expecting to get out of this conversation. Closure, in one way or another. For me to finally let go of her. But I wouldn’t.

I wanted her too damn bad to let her escape like that.

“Go out with me.” I asked the second that the office door was closed behind us, and she immediately started shaking her head. “Yes, please,” I insisted. “Let me show you that I want more from you. I want so much more.”

“I can’t give you more,” was her answer, and she still avoided my eyes as she spoke. “One night, you even had two. That’s all I can give you. Please don’t ask me for anything more.”

“Why?” I asked, and the frustration in my voice was enough to get her to meet my eyes for the first time that evening. “Why are you trying to avoid this? I know you want me, Y/N. You wouldn’t have slept with me if you didn’t. So just tell me why.”

“I can’t,” she insisted, moving towards the door, but I grasped her hand to stop her before she could slip through it - much like she had done that first night, when I thought I’d screwed up any chance I had to ever be with her.

“Tell me why you’re holding yourself back from me,” I ordered, anger and desire creating an explosive cocktail inside of me, making my voice hoarse. I saw her shiver. I watched her break.

“Because it was too fucking good and I swear to God, if you get your mouth on me again, I’m gonna marry you.” Our expressions mirrored one another, eyes wide, mouths hanging open. She couldn’t believe she had let out her feelings like this. I couldn’t believe there was all there was to it.

I dropped to my knees before her.

“Come here.” I shoved her jeans all the way down to her ankles, sending the button flying somewhere. I couldn’t tell where and I didn’t care. All I wanted was to show her that there was nothing wrong with wanting this, with wanting me because as long as she allowed me to, I’d give anything to be with her.

My tongue was so hungry to taste her sweetness again. I licked a stripe between her lower lips before I could even get my hand there, spreading her with my fingers for easier access.

God, she was heavenly. I watched her let her head fall back against the door, much like the first time I was able to be in this position, and my heartbeat fluttered at the realization that this time, I was much closer to getting what I really wanted from her.

“I’ve been terrified of my own feelings for long enough,” I decided to confess, parting from her clit to be able to speak but slipping two digits inside her hole, filling her up, preparing her to welcome me. “I can wait for you to come to terms with yours. But I can’t keep myself away,” I warned, quickening my movements as I chased away the taste of her in my tongue. “So don’t ask that of me.”

Her moan had my eyes sparkling with excitement. I lowered my head to suck her button, see the way it made her thighs tremble on each side of my face.

“So fucking sexy,” I moaned against her cunt. “Come for me, sweetheart. Drench my face.” Her little cry of ecstasy denounced she was about to do just that, so I twirled my tongue around her clit, rubbing my digits against her sweet spot as her body tensed under my ministrations.

“There you go…” I whispered, fascinated with the way she looked after her release. It was like she glowed from the inside, muscles relaxing to accept my caresses when I finished cleaning her with my tongue and rose to my full height.

“Next time you try to pretend something between us didn’t happen, I’m gonna bend you over the counter and spank your ass in front of all of the other patrons,” I warned her before nibbling her earlobe. “Go out with me,” I tried again, and she took a deep breath before answering, looking up at me from under her eyelashes.

“Okay.”