#i need a tag for this... ill make one in a bit

[cringe6fail6star6]

milk taste from kings of hell (whb): (cw: suggestive)

I, as one does, have experience with man lactation and would like to expand and share it with YOU in regards to hell leaders:

Satan - good contender, but sadly with alcohol contents in his bloodstream,, even if he stops for a millenia only thing that will stop would be his liver bc it got used to alcohol far more than water. If you like slight burning sensation you can squeeze them harder to adjust spiciness. May prefer more violent sucking, so sharpen ur teeth with my coupon "cringe-worthy-simp-666" for 10% off on hell claires to satisfy your king in return! 5/10, take better care of urself

Mammon - as my dear subordinate/fellow test subject suggested - would produce chocolate milk.

Reference:

<- which would make him top of my rating if i wasnt more biased. The texture is creamy and comes out pretty easily when Mammon relaxes his pecs. Simple press is enough. Mammon u didnt have to wear cow outfit but thanks for staying on theme. No it doesnt get u extra points. BUT the taste does intrigue me, and for that Mammon is above all for now. 7/10, Bimet u owe me 13.56 for that claires coupon promotion.

Belphegor - perfect milk, hard to get it bc this man is a washboard, but fpr perfection a bit of further stimulation is not too much of work-- Wait what... what do you mean results were tampered with?... uhuh... hm...Sorry, i must take back my praise - Beleth curated kings meals so they would show positive results which is CHEATING. you heard it. The laziest king and his overworked second in command CHEATED. I guess ill need to do more testing after a few days. >:) ?/10, pending

Beelzebub - look, the fact that i was sucking for last 20 minutes just means that i have hard time deciding if its good or bad - NOT THAT HES WINNING BY A LARGE MARGIN - so please let me continue with testing in peace for next 12 hours and then ill give you my answer...maybe. ???/10, pending.

Leviathan - cheated and tried to threaten the judge for saying his tits arent built to be milked with as much intensity as the king desires so now im being hanged. Disqualified. Pls dont hang me or im gonna bang all ur nobles and force u to cuck for the next month.

Lucifer - theyre great. If u like shitty tea after taste and Gimigin salivating along with you on his other titty. l, myself, not a big fan of sharing. But if the big brother of hell AND heaven keeps his milks warm for my mouth and tongue - i may consider. In the moment it has this unique quality of having blood mixed in so i had to take a few points out. 6/10

Asmodeous - youd hope i disqualifie him, but sadly no, he followed the procedure like a good boy. Actually good texture, i would say chunku but maybe im just feeling things after spinning his nipple for so long, part just fell off. His moaning was grating on my nerves but pheromones mixed in with milk do eleviate the taste. It tastes like hazelnut milk and im horrified by that fact but sadly its too good to denu myself simple pleasures. Did ask to milk me back (i dont feel my dick or balls). 8/10 9/10 10/10

I'll be sucking his(Asmos) tits from now on until next competition of that sort. If youd like to add or have your own experiences with lactating kings or other nobles (or even common devils) please write it down in the comments or tags or mention me in your posts! Thx for reading.

[that-darn-clown]

(letter time, bestie <3 aka today's rp but we get to see mc!Dandy's thoughts on what happened)

dear Maxx,

hey bestie, how're you doing? hope everything's going well. sorry i haven't wrote back in a bit, kinda just got settled into my current place, y'know? haven't had a lot of time for writing.

i actually just got done making a farm. then i can make some bread, like you taught me to!

well...that's not all that happened.

so uh...i met another faery here. interesting guy, i must say.

now look, i know i told you about...What Happened, but before you get all worried for me, everything's alright. things are a bit awkward, especially given that i wasn't expecting to meet anyone else out here, but we aren't at each other's throats. and i really, really hope it stays that way.

voi seems nice enough. didn't try anything funny with me, y'know? wish every encounter i had with my own species went that way. anyway, he seems to really like copper a lot, too. which i think is pretty cool. maybe i'll be able to get close with faer, who knows?

well, i'll write back soon, maybe i'll be able to get a mushroom or a dozen and make a Ring, and we'll see how it goes. look, i know you've told me before that it probably won't work, but hey! maybe it will this time. it's got to. not that i wouldn't mind staying here with you, obviously, but...i just need to find out if it's possible or not. and sure, by this point, you'd probably tell me it's not gonna work, but hey. four chickens can come out of an egg sometimes. it doesn't happen often, but it can happen. what if making a Ring is like the Four Chicken Eggs, and i've just gotta wait for it to work?

well, now it's time for me to Actually end the letter. love ya, bestie!

Your Queerplatonic Partner,

Dandy Li0n <3

Dear Dandy,

Hey! Always nice to get a letter from you! And don't worry about not sending one in a while, I understand, buddy. New friends is exciting, I hope voi is a bit more chill than some of the other folks you've met along the way.

Glad you're getting settled, love to hear that you have a farm now! My farm has been doing well, in fact I just made some bread this morning.

About the mushroom ring... look I'm not gonna say it won't work. That would be rude of me. What I am going to say is... be careful. And maybe I just want it to not work so you'll stay safe.

So! Always nice to hear from the best partner in the world, hope the new friend is chill and that you make some awesome bread. And good luck with the mushroom rings (even if they don't work)

All my love,

Maxx

[tzarrz]

i listen to fog lake too much

[xltoucan]

I'm going to be real I think it's weird to have a bit about Ichiban having schizophrenia. Like as if it's a funny joke.

[lostandbackagain]

valkyrie moodboard part 4 🎉🎉🎉

pt. 1 pt. 2 pt. 3

[nabaath-areng]

I have way too many alts that I keep to myself (which is why I generally refrain from posting them), but I'm going to ignore that habit for a moment just because I'm feeling particularly insane about this guy.

[jack-fruit]

Surprise! New one-shot from me written as a belated birthday gift for @kerink. Not for children, Yada Yada be free.

[leftoverbriocheloaf]

Ok long yap but I wanna write a camp halfblood au for bsd so bad askljalsdj bc hear me out yosano daughter of hades grows up in an orphanage (run by fukazawa, who acts as chiron in this au just like chiron works at percy's school trying to keep an eye on yosano) and ranpo grows up in the same orphanage, but ranpo is a mortal who can see through the mist. and like yk how sally was at risk for monster attacks bc of how much time she spent with percy despite being human? the same thing applies to ranpo. So when fukuzawa needs to take yosano to camp halfblood for her own safety he takes ranpo too, who just says he was "claimed" before they reached camp-halfblood to keep the "he doesn't have an ability but he acts like he does" vibes

Back at camp halfblood we've got Poe, son of athena who arrived at camp halfblood after his uncle decided he couldn't deal with the demigod stuff (his dad was already dead atp), and lucy who arrived a year before yosano and ranpo with louisa and is a daughter of Hephaestus who makes giant bronze battle statues like the ones across manhattan in the pjo series that look like Anne from Anne's room

Louisa is also a younger daughter of athena ofc

We've also got Dazai as a son of Dionysus with his laid-back but manipulative vibes and Chuuya son of ares (I don't wanna make them children of the big three bc I'd want Atsushi to have that) with Kouyou and Verlaine also children of Ares w him, and then Atsushi is a son of zeus and akutagawa and gin are children of hermes (so akutagawa feels inferior like a lot of the kids of hermes do in canon bc their abilities aren't really combat focused)

Kenji son of demeter, obviously, Kyouka hunter of artemis and tanizaki is a mentee of hecate (which was established by hazel as a thing in the 2nd series) with Naomi being a prophet like rachel?? Kunikida is an apollo kid who utilizes poetry and appreciates rising with the sun (hes a pretty unusual child of apollo which makes dazai try and get him to loosen up) and he's head of the cabin and takes very good care of the younger campers

But like??? It works??? ive been thinking about this au so much im obsessedddd if I wrote it it probably wouldn't be like pjo canon compliant just using the camp as an au but i think it would be so much fun aslkjalksdjka

[bialbovi]

Had an appointment today bc my skin was making me anxious and doodled these while I was waiting in line

I DIDNT KNOW THEY ADDED more COLOURS IN NOTES?? AND I CAN ZOOM?? I CAN JUST DRAW ON MY PHONE NOW??? whattt since when

Also I wrote way too much in tags but I guess I want people to sketch and doodle more!! Please do it. Doodles are lovely :з

[apolloccentric]

old stuff just to feel something

[monkee-mobile]

ough god, I cried over this

[itissadbutitsmy-life]

listen I just can’t find fault with a candy person for finding something that unexpectedly brings them joy and doing everything in their power to make it keep happening. I just can’t find it in me to blame them for wanting the approval of the person they love and respect more than anyone else, and wanting that approval over and over again, and I just straight up can’t blame james for figuring out a trick to make his princess smile and call him her hero. like, banana guards get her praise and approval and hugs all the time, but he’s just some random engineer with an easy smile and no one who wants to hang out with him after work. and she likes him so much, she wants him in her kingdom, even when he goes and does something stupid like push her out of the way of a super dangerous not-moving car, at the cost of his own life, she wants him back and she’ll bring him back and she'll tell him that was very brave and she loves him. of course she loves him. she loves all the candy people. but he figured out how to make her look him in the eyes and say it and give him material evidence of her pride. I can’t find it in myself to blame him for that. it wasn't good, i don't think he should have been left unchecked to keep going forever, but i can't blame him for wanting to keep reliving the nice thing that happened once. the really nice thing that happened once that came with material gifts. if she didn’t want to keep doing it she would’ve stopped LONG before there were TWENTY FIVE of them. before she was so fed up that she didn’t even spare him a kind goodbye or a chance to go home one more time.

like you’re not beating the dystopian dictatorship allegations. saying she was right to exile him from the only home he’s ever known with no recourse because he was acting weird. and the thing is, I just can’t find it in me to blame a character living in a dictatorship for getting himself into a situation because he was desperately trying to be happy the best way he could figure out how. I’m not saying he was right, he’s insane, but it just rubs me wrong, the idea that he is the one holding all this heavy blame. the idea that the princess is right to look down at him and shake her head firmly and turn him out in the cold. for chasing the rush that she gave him willingly, over and over, without any specific end parameters. for not being able to make friends, and doing something weird about it. he’s bored and lonely and this works and it’s not, inherently, bad. it really isn’t. it’s batshit, but it’s actually not hurting anyone at all.

[adriartts]

been busy Not Drawing but allow me to rough design the Sirens' Song finally

[cent-scratchnsniff]

from a bit back. sorry to you yesod in particular the bees called

[liquidstar]

a friend who'd wait :)

[scopophobia-polaris]

first female loz director and the gerudo seem to be written fine enough? wow... there ain't no way I thought we were in the worst timeline after totk

Yeah got through the main quest with the gerudo, it wasn't painful! It wasn't even bad! Still got them outfits but for the most part it was like oh cool!

I would say a lot of that oh cool is from the fact they didn't do a lot to even fuck it up to begin with, I'm gonna be real with yall this game is NOT worth $60USD

Edit: lemme say one thing, you know when people were being like damn totk story wasn't dark or mature at all why was this compared to Majora's mask again? And then all the zeldatwt people came out and said zelda is just a kid series domt expect good writing uH

This one feels like a kid's game. That ain't to say it's terrible I would say, hell I'm not far in it if I get something crazy that's like OH FUCK I'll reblog this post and say something but uh.....game for babies I'm gonna be shocked if anyone struggles with any puzzles cuz you CAN CHEESE THEM EASY ITS 🫢🤭

EDIT EDIT: I SWEAR IM NOT EVEN TRYING TO BE A DOWNER..... @ezlo-x HAS BEEN THERE THE WHOLE TIME IVE BEEN PLAYING....THEY KNOW I HAVENT BEEN A PARTY POOPER.....