#i might post the recipes I contributed in the future

[cryiling]

here is my art contribution for @mxtxfoodzine, the free mxtx zine complete with so many amazing recipes!! sizhui and jingyi are making jiaozi, and you can too! check out the pdf linked in @mxtxfoodzine's pinned post and enjoy this recipe, plus two more classic taiwanese recipes, PLUS all the amazing entries our contributors have to offer :>

this artwork is actually a companion piece to telling the bees (or, sizhui's tale) by @stiltonbasket!!!! it's literally so amazing u guys, you should totally read it 😭💗💗💗

I'm so happy to finally share this artwork with all of you! it's been in the works for a long time, and although my art style has evolved a little bit since I completed this, I am still so proud of this one 🥺

[sprintingowl]

Deadball

Deadball Second Edition is a platinum bestseller on DrivethruRPG. This means it's in the top 2% of all products on the site. Its back cover has an endorsement from Sports Illustrated Kids.

It's also not an rpg I'd heard about until I discovered all of these facts one after another.

I was raised in a profoundly anti-sports household. My father would say stuff like "sports is for people who can't think" and "there's no point in exercising, everything in your body goes away eventually." So I didn't learn really any of the rules of the more popular American sports until I was in my mid twenties, and I've been to two ballgames in my life. I appreciate the enthusiasm that people have for sports, but it's in the same way that I appreciate anyone talking about their specific fandom.

One of the things that struck me reading Deadball was its sense of reverence for the sport. Its language isn't flowery. It's plain and technical and smart. But its love for baseball radiates off of the pages. Not like a blind adoration. But like when a dog sits with you on the porch.

For folks familiar with indie rpgs, there's a tone throughout the book that feels OSR. Deadball doesn't claim to be a precise simulation or a baseball wargame or anything like that---instead it lays out a bunch of rules and then encourages you to treat them like a recipe, adjusting to your taste. And it does this *while* being a detailed simulation that skirts the line of wargaming, which is an extremely OSR thing to do.

For folks not familiar with baseball, Deadball starts off assuming you know nothing and it explains the core rules of the sport before trying to pin dice and mechanics onto anything. It also explains baseball notation (which I was not able to decipher) and it uses this notation to track a play-by-play report of each game. Following this is an example of play and---in a move I think more rpgs should steal from---it has you play out a few rounds of this example of play. Again, this is all before it's really had a section explaining its rules.

In terms of characters and stats, Deadball is a detailed game. You can play modern or early 1900s baseball, and players can be of any gender on the same team, so there's a sort of alt history flavor to the whole experience, but there's also an intricate dice roll for every at bat and a full list of complex baseball feats that any character can have alongside their normal baseball stats. Plus there's a full table for oddities (things not normally covered by the rules of baseball, such as a raccoon straying onto the field and attacking a pitcher,) and a whole fatigue system for pitchers that contributes a strong sense of momentum to the game.

Deadball is also as much about franchises as it is about individual games, and you can also scout players, trade players, track injuries, track aging, appoint managers of different temperaments, rest pitchers in between games, etc.

For fans of specific athletes, Deadball includes rules for creating players, for playing in different eras, for adapting historical greats into one massively achronological superteam, and for playing through two different campaigns---one in a 2020s that wasn't and one in the 1910s.

There's also thankfully a simplified single roll you can use to abstract an entire game, allowing you to speed through seasons and potentially take a franchise far into the future. Finances and concession sales and things like that aren't tracked, but Deadball has already had a few expansions and a second edition, so this might be its next frontier.

Overall, my takeaway from Deadball is that it's a heck of a game. It's a remarkably detailed single or multiplayer simulation that I think might work really well for play-by-post (you could get a few friends to form a league and have a whole discord about it,) and it could certainly be used to generate some Blaseball if you start tweaking the rules as you play and never stop.

It's also an interesting read from a purely rpg design perspective. Deadball recognizes that its rules have the potential to be a little overbearing and so it puts in lots of little checks against that. It also keeps its more complex systems from sprawling out of control by trying to pack as much information as possible into a single dice roll.

For someone like me who has zero background in baseball, I don't think I'd properly play Deadball unless I had a bunch of friends who were into it and I could ride along with that enthusiasm. However as a designer I like the book a lot, and I'm putting it on my shelf of rpgs that have been formative for me, alongside Into The Odd, Monsterhearts, Mausritter, and Transit.

[themovieblogonline]

Neve Campbell Returns: Scream VII Revives Sidney Prescott's Legacy

Hold on to your popcorn, horror fans! The Scream franchise is gearing up for its seventh chapter, and it’s more thrilling than a midnight phone call from Ghostface himself. Neve Campbell is stepping back into her iconic role as Sidney Prescott, and the excitement is palpable. Here’s everything you need to know about why "Scream VII" might just be the slasher film we’ve all been waiting for. Neve Campbell Scream: A Frighteningly Familiar Face Neve Campbell, the queen of screams, is returning to the franchise that made her famous. The actress, who’s been absent since "Scream VI," is coming back for "Scream VII," and this time, it’s all about Sidney Prescott. Campbell’s return isn’t just a nostalgic move; it’s a strategic one. She’s stated that the new film’s focus on Sidney was a major factor in her decision to come back. "They did pitch the concept to me, and it’s the reason that I jumped on board," Campbell told Entertainment Tonight. So, why is this such a big deal? Sidney Prescott is the heart and soul of the Scream franchise. Her survival through six films proves she’s tougher than a two-dollar steak. With Ghostface still lurking in the shadows, it’s clear that the slasher saga is going back to its roots, focusing on the character who has seen it all. The Return of Kevin Williamson If you’re wondering who’s behind the madness this time, look no further than Kevin Williamson. The man who penned the original "Scream" and its sequel, "Scream 2," is back to direct. Williamson’s involvement is like adding a touch of classic seasoning to a beloved dish. His return suggests that "Scream VII" will stay true to the franchise’s winning formula of suspense, humor, and self-aware horror. Williamson’s script for "Scream 4" was a hit, and with him back at the helm, fans can expect a blend of nostalgia and fresh thrills. This isn’t just any reboot; it’s a revival with the original recipe. Behind the Scenes Drama It wouldn’t be a Scream movie without a bit of drama, right? Neve Campbell’s departure from "Scream VI" was due to a perceived undervaluation of her role, but it seems that the franchise has made amends. In 2022, Campbell expressed her frustration, saying she didn’t feel her contributions were properly recognized. However, Williamson’s recent support for her return indicates a shift in how the franchise values its stars. Things took a turn for the bizarre when Melissa Barrera, the new lead star, was fired over controversial social media posts. Jenna Ortega also dropped out, leaving the franchise in a bit of a pickle. But, as they say, when one door closes, another opens. Campbell’s return is a refreshing change, and it shows that the franchise is ready to pivot and adapt. What To Expect from Scream VII "Scream VII" promises to be a rollercoaster of suspense and scares. With Campbell back as Sidney Prescott, we can expect a blend of classic Scream thrills and new twists. The franchise is evolving, and Campbell’s involvement suggests that this new chapter will be both a tribute to the past and a bold step into the future. As the franchise kicks off this new era, fans can look forward to more Ghostface antics and a deeper dive into Sidney’s character. Whether you’re a longtime fan or a newcomer, "Scream VII" is set to deliver the chills and thrills that made the series a horror staple. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3iKWeRPDsaE (Source: Deadline) Read the full article

[giggles-and-freckles]

Okay woohoo some fic recs incoming!!!! These will probably be all over the place, but I’ve just got to scream about them for a second!!! PS gonna try to do these more frequently because this is fun!!!

Click below the cut if you dare!

Declarations by Nny11

Summary: A series exploring Obi-Wan and Ahsoka's relationship as Grandmaster and Grandpadawan.

Okay, so this is one of the first fics I can genuinely remember reading with a heavy emphasis on the relationship between Obi-Wan and Ahsoka where I was like 'hey oh my god I love them?’ It was a monumental moment for me because now I am so obscenely ride or die for them and I truly do think back to this fic often with utter fondness. 

A moment I loved: 

“From a certain point of view,” he finally conceded, motioning her to start again. “At least I know you’ve learned something from me!”

“Well I couldn’t learn the secrets of your hair routine!”

the flood comes rushing in by @kenobilovebot

Summary: "I have done this for you. I have put you first." Or, Anakin finds out.

A little bit of sith!Obi-Wan? As a treat? Hm, well...all right!!!!! I don’t want to say too much here because I would really prefer you read it than read any more of my mindless babbling but–it’s good.

A moment I loved: 

He can hardly think around the smothering darkness that has so wholly encompassed his master, so effectively destroying the light that has always been. He’s always been able to reach for it at the worst of times. Now he can’t feel it at all.

a time to say goodbye by Sokaless

Summary: Ezra isn't the only one facing the temptation of change in the World Between Worlds. Just minutes after facing Vader, Ahsoka falls through a portal seventeen years into the past and must relive her final encounter with Anakin and Obi-Wan without drastically altering the future. But Anakin Skywalker taught her many things. How to push her luck was one of them.

This is a short and sweet time-travel fic that finds Ahsoka back in that moment in the hangar with Anakin right before they unknowingly have their last goodbye. She knows more now than she did before and struggles not to say it all. But the theme of learning from loss is really special and powerful and I feel this sad sort of closure when I finish (I say that actively because I have...read this fic several several times). Painful, poignant–all the best things.

A moment I loved:

One last thing she learned from Anakin- teaching a lesson often requires holding your student to higher standards than you hold yourself. 

With the knowledge that she’s holding him to a standard she herself might never reach, Ahsoka tells Ezra, “I’m asking you to let go.”

good morning, sun by @katierosefun​

Summary: “You look miserable.” Ahsoka dropped her hand, spun around. Obi-Wan stood behind her, one arm carrying a cloak and the other half-extended to Ahsoka. [or: After she leaves the Order, Ahsoka has one last encounter with Obi-Wan.]

Let’s see how many of Caroline��s fics I can get away with posting before someone reports me. This one-shot is full of all the good post-wrong jedi stuff. Soka and Obi have a conversation at Dex’s that hurts a lot but also feels real and I will never not respect Caroline for understanding the nuances of the disaster trios intricate and intimate relationships with each other and how they shift and mold around different circumstances. This feels so authentically them that it hurts.

A moment I loved: 

What came out instead was a small, half-choked sound.

When Obi-Wan opened his arms, Ahsoka fell right into them. “It hurts,” Ahsoka said, her voice cracking. “A lot.”

“I know,” Obi-Wan replied thickly. “We’ll take care of it.”

You Haunt All My What-Ifs by @kckenobi

Summary: But then she saw the way Obi-Wan’s lip was quivering, and his eyes were shining, and she realized— He hadn’t called because he needed to tell her. He’d called because he needed her. “Obi-Wan,” she breathed. “Oh, Obi-Wan…” And she wanted to reach out, to hold him. To be his refuge, his shelter, his home. Instead she just watched as he shook his head, palmed at his eyes, apologized. She reached out. Touched the hologram. It flickered. — [Satine and Obi-Wan—then, now, and every echo of what if between them.]

One of the first fics that got me on my Obitine grind!! Just the right mix of angst and angst to create the perfect recipe of absolute sorrow. These characters feel so real I could reach out and hug them–and oh, how I want to after this incredible little fic.

A moment I loved:

And then suddenly she was thinking of every little what if—the other paths they could’ve taken, the millions of ways they could’ve ended up here. She imagined a future where he’d stayed. She saw white weddings, crying infants, painting nursery rhymes on a pale bedroom wall. She saw herself rolling over in the middle of the night, bumping shoulders, feeling his warm breath on her face. She saw family dinners, rushed breakfasts as they hurried the kids off to school. She saw laughter. She saw a lifetime. And at the end, she saw herself old and gray, holding his hand, his eyes the last thing she’d ever see.They had arrived at the end now. But she was not old and gray.

Dying Words by @cloudyskywars

Summary: Anakin is trapped beneath a collapsed building, and has one final conversation with Obi-Wan.

One of my favourite febuwhump contributions from within the mountain of wonderful fics that the second month of the year created!! Some good ol classic Obi & Ani pain. Hint of a deathfic...but mostly just the moments leading up to it. And they...hurt. Also!!! Melanie took the care to make Anakin’s final words be about Obi-Wan, which is very special to me for the reason she includes in her author’s note.

A moment I loved:

“And,” he said, “if you ever see Ahsoka again, tell her she was the best padawan I could have asked for.” His breaths were coming in rapid pants, now, and the room was spinning out of focus. “Obi-Wan?” he asked, voice barely audible. “Yes, Padawan mine?” he responded, his own voice shaky as well. “Thank you for being my Master,” Anakin said.

i’m only me when i’m with you idiots by @renegadeontherunn

Summary: who let Obi-Wan pick the holo? and where's the remote? they might need a bigger blanket. 

[or, Anakin, Ahsoka, and Obi-Wan have leave on Coruscant and holo night is the perfect excuse to all squeeze onto a couch together, bicker, and be, well, a family]

Fluff, fluff, fluff! Yes, please! My dear Fiona does a wonderful job wrapping these three up in a blanket and plopping them in front of a holo for a night of witty banter and so-cute-I-could-melt platonic cuddles. I love these three, I love this fic!

A moment I loved: 

“You met a civilized Padawan? Couldn’t have been ours.”

get home by @curse-of-men

Summary: After a mission goes wrong and Jedi Knight Anakin Skywalker goes missing, it is up to Obi-Wan Kenobi and Ahsoka Tano to bring him home.

[or: a Grandmaster and a Grandpadawan go on a road trip to rescue chaos personified]

What? Me? Rec’ing another Obi-Wan and Ahsoka centric fic? HUH? Hehe, I love that Lou says this is the missing Obi & Soka arc in their author’s note because um, did they look into my heart and know that’s what I most desire? Anyway, this three-parter is incredible from start to finish and I demand you all go read it immediately. :-)

A moment I loved:

Making their way to the cockpit, Ahsoka tilts her head into Obi-Wan’s general direction and says: “You know, Master, Anakin would probably think things so far have gone excellently.” Obi-Wan returns her look and sighs.

“Now you surely must get why I am so worried about this.” Ahsoka grins and gestures back and forth in the empty space between them with one hand.

“For what it’s worth, I think we make a good enough team.”

we stand here, together by @nightdotlight​

Summary: Master Depa Billaba and Padawan Caleb Dume.

Windu worries for them, out in the wider galaxy. Waging war, while he and Anakin sit here, waiting.

But he trained Billaba, and Billaba is training Dume. Anakin once took lessons from her, when he himself was a Padawan, and he knows she is skilled enough by far, to ensure that both she and her student make it back to Coruscant safely.

It’s ironic, that when cut off from the Force he can understand other people better than he has in years.

ZOWEE!!!! This fic made me ugly cry on my conference period at school!! Ha! Another fic that culminates in, er...death. But!!!! The lead-up! Ooh, baby! The writing style of this one is also very fresh and unique which I appreciate as someone who essentially reads the same thing eight million ways (by choice, mind you!!!! and loves it every time!!!!). This is just an absolute gem of a fic. Queue: your best crying playlist.

A moment I loved: 

Depa, her Padawan braid hanging from her shoulder, hugs him around his middle and drags him to the training salles. The whole way, her laughter follows them– warm, like summer rain. Like the smallest, most ephemeral moments of happiness.

Her smile feels like a sunset on his back, and Mace smiles back even as they spar, as green and purple clash over and over again in a dance unique to teacher and student.

He does not need to reach out to know the galaxy is at peace. When they take a break from their own spar, Mace feels a light tap on his presence in the Force; when he turns, Ahsoka Tano stands there in training robes, her own Master a few paces behind– and beside him, Obi-Wan Kenobi, face lighter than it has been in years.

Her Padawan beads hang from her headdress; when she smiles at the banter behind her, turning to retort, they catch the light, and the half-formed impression of those beads torn asunder and held in gloved hand is dissipated by the glare.

Only Hope by @tessiete

Summary: The infamous "Year on the Run".In the wake of her father's death, Satine is assigned two Jedi to escort her safely back to Mandalore, but in the chaotic aftermath of a civil war, there is more at stake than one person's survival. Together, they work to unite Mandalore, overcome ancient grudges, and bring peace to a world ravaged by bloodshed.

Man, oh man, do I love a good year on the run fic! And man oh man am I loving the heck out of this one. It’s in progress so go ahead give it a bookmark and a subscription while you’re at it!!!! But the banter! The sass! The (I assume soon to come) pining! The Qui-Gon third wheeling! READ IT! Cannot recommend highly enough.

A moment I loved: 

“...and you’re bound to be hungry.”

“I assure you, I’m not.”

“Well, Obi-Wan is,” Jinn asserts. His back is to his apprentice and so he cannot see the mutinous glance which darts his way. “And as you’ve seen, he’s trouble when he isn’t fed. You have five minutes.”

Goes to Ground by jerseydevious

Summary: Obi-Wan has a question for Anakin following his experiences on Zygerria.

Silly Jedi boys trying and failing to communicate, gosh dang it!!! They get there, eventually, though. :’) Some post Zygerria angst and some tough discussions. HERE. FOR. IT. 

A moment I loved: 

“You are a bad influence, padawan mine,” Obi-Wan said. He gave Anakin that smile, the one that made Anakin feel like he shared a secret with his Master, something only for them.

In Sacrifice, Peace by @ilonga

Summary: “Shh. . .” Anakin says, gathering the younglings around him, reminding Obi-wan of all those whispered arguments where he had insisted to Anakin that yes, he was good with children, he’d be just fine teaching Ahsoka. He can almost feel the terror rising off Anakin from the hologram; Anakin doesn’t know what’s happening either. But he isn’t letting the younglings feel it. “You need to listen to me very carefully, okay? This--” his voice breaks, “--this is going to be scary. But you have to be calm, and strong. Just like Master Yoda taught you.” [Or, the ROTS au where Obi-wan finds a very different type of pain while looking through the Temple's recordings of Order 66.]

PAIN AWAITS YOU HERE! But that is exactly why you should click, kudos, comment, bookmark, and let this fic live in your head rent free like it’s living in mine. Truly couldn’t get it out of there if I wanted to! AND I DO NOT! Yet another deathfic and angst with The Team (TM). Read it, peeps.

A moment I loved: 

“And then?”Obi-wan closes his eyes, pretends he can’t feel the weight of the body in his arms, pretends it’s really Anakin he’s talking to and not some worrying coping mechanism. “And then we fight.” he says.

to hold by @katierosefun

Summary: “What—” Ahsoka looked up and, where she had expected to find a mumbling drunk, she found instead—

“Master Kenobi?” Ahsoka asked, stunned. She straightened, already swinging her backpack around herself again.

“Ahsoka,” Obi-Wan managed. He was breathing hard, just barely bent over because he was supporting, Ahsoka realized dumbly, Anakin.

Anakin, whose head was lolling against Obi-Wan’s shoulder. Whose face was two shades too pale and eyes fluttering and lips parted in a soundless groan that brought Ahsoka right back to battlefields and med bays and other places that she hadn’t been in a long, long while. [or: after leaving the Order, Ahsoka runs into some familiar faces.]

Caroline at it again with the post-wrong-jedi disaster trio angst comin’ in hot! Some platonic bed-sharing, some confused Anakin, some conflicted Ahsoka, some pained Obi-Wan. Well–strike that. They’re all in pain. But what do we expect, honestly? What do we want, honestly? Pain. We want pain.

A moment I loved: 

“Only another dream,” Obi-Wan said. He looked at Ahsoka, his face just barely shadowed. “Seems that it’s passed.”

Another. 

Ahsoka’s stomach twisted. She looked at the hand she was holding. It was strange—she couldn’t remember if she had ever actually held onto Anakin’s hand this tightly before, but now she could feel the familiar callouses, make out just the faintest of old scars. Ahsoka squeezed it once.

Not near as many as I planned to do or have saved and ready to rec, but...this already got, er...quite lengthy. So! Same time, next week! I’ll have some more! (Well, probably not same time and maybe not even next week...but soon.) 

[ravencyclebigbang]

Raven Cycle Big Bang 2020 Masterlist

The 2020 Raven Cycle/Call Down The Hawk Big Bang has come to a close! 

Twenty-six teams (and some…) created a ton of great fanfic and fanart over the course of the event. When we started this event we couldn’t have known what 2020 would end up being, so our appreciation goes to all participants for being so resilient and marvellous and sticking with us until the very end.

A Big Bang is traditionally a fandom event that produces 10k+ words fan fictions and associated art, all fully complete. That’s all the reading and looking your art might desire!!!

Please make sure to show your love to all creators by commenting, kudosing and sending loving pigeons!  And stay tuned, because we might have a little Post-Bang Giveaway ready for you…

We have an Ao3 collection in case you want to filter by tags and ratings and the like. Below the cut is a full master list of the various contributions to the TRC Big Bang, so they can be browsed with ease.

Team #1: that perilous stuff (which weighs upon the heart)

Fanfic: AO3 Art: Tumblr

Writer: @saywhatjessie (tumblr)/JessJesstheBest (AO3)

Artist: @pygmypouter (tumblr)

Beta: @rroguess (tumblr)

Synopsis: “Uh, Mr. Parrish? You’d like to read for Lady Macbeth?” Adam felt his eye twitch, even while he nodded. It was true that even at an all boy’s school where boys would have had to read the female parts, Adam probably wouldn’t have normally volunteered to read Lady Macbeth. But Ronan had called him a nerd. So he was prepared to be the biggest nerd Ronan had seen. “I know what I’m about, ma’am.” Or Ronan and Adam volunteer to read for Macbeth and Lady Macbeth in class. Shenanigans ensue.

Team #2: Uncanny Omens

Fanfic: AO3 | gthechangeling Art: Tumblr | drawfulneutral Art: Tumblr

Writer: @yesterdarling (tumblr)/YesterDarling (AO3)

Artist: @gthechangeling (tumblr)

Artist: @drawfulneutral (tumblr)

Beta: ghostangel (AO3)

Synopsis: The Forces of Heaven and Hell have always assumed that the world would end. More specifically, they always assumed the world would precisely end on a Saturday evening, just a few days after the Antichrist’s birthday. The Armies are forming, the Four Horsemen have been drawn out, and the Antichrist is coming into his full power. Yet not everyone longs for Armageddon. Adam and Ronan - an Angel and Demon living in rural Virginia - most certainly don’t want it to; not when Earth has so many libations that they’ve come to enjoy. Besides, Armageddon without humans having a say in the matter wouldn’t be fair, would it? With their livelihoods and the lives of Mankind on the line, they plot to throw a wrench in the Divine Plan. It’d go far easier if anyone knew where the Antichrist was, though.

Team #3: We seek someone to sew sutures in the places where we’re torn

Fanfic: AO3 | Art: Tumblr

Writer: @blueseyforthesoul (tumblr)/kirani (AO3)

Artist: @thecorvidrotation (tumblr)

Synopsis: Gansey isn’t the half of his soulmate pair with a name, and Blue hasn’t said anything so he doesn’t think she has his name either. That doesn’t mean he doesn’t have a huge crush on the cute bassist of his roommate’s band. Shenanigans ensue.

Team #4: You Better Shape Up

Fanfic: AO3 | Art: Tumblr

Writer: stop_whining (AO3)

Artist: @attentionhoard (tumblr)

Synopsis: A Pynch fic inspired by the classic 1978 movie/musical Grease for TRC Big Bang 2020.

Team #6: Pranks and Pups!

Fanfic: AO3 | Art: Instagram

Writer: @comfy-spot (tumblr)/RandyKorn (AO3)

Artist: manao.ri (instagram)

Synopsis: The end of winter break rolls around, and Ronan finds himself stuck in a depressive episode despite the miracle of having his friends all together once again. Blue and Henry bully him into a Platonic Date Night Extraordinaire (which isn’t so platonic on Henry’s part). There’s gelato, misdemeanors, dog piles, a duck, dance parties, and even a car chase - everything necessary to force one Ronan Lynch into admitting that he’s just as deserving of love and care as the rest of them.

Team #7: In gardens all wet with rain

Fanfic: AO3 | forestgeitart Art: Tumblr | purrsnicket Art: Tumblr

Writer: @magicienetreveur (tumblr)/hollyanneg (AO3)

Artist: @forestgeitart (tumblr)

Artist: @purrsnicket (tumblr)

Beta: @semicolonsandsimiles (tumblr)

Synopsis: In a land where magic is real, Ronan spends most of his time hiding from it in the palace gardens, where he’d once met a boy who could tell the future. There’s love letters, a masquerade ball, and an evil plot to be foiled.

Team #8: The Waiting Game

Fanfic: AO3 | Art: Tumblr

Writer: @inoctavo (tumblr)/inoctavo (AO3)

Artist: @lenaisanerd (tumblr)

Beta: @emjenenla (tumblr)

Synopsis: When all they can do is wait, Declan’s mind catastrophizes… then tries to plan for them. It’s a good recipe to make more problems when everyone’s gone around the emotional ringer. Featuring existential crises, denial, tough decisions, Declan meeting Opal for the first time, and Jordan painting Declan like one of her French girls.

Team #9: if love is just a game (then how come it’s no fun)

Fanfic: AO3 | Art: Tumblr

Writer: @toast-the-unknowing (tumblr)/shinealightonme (AO3)

Artist: @rroguess (tumblr)

Synopsis: Ronan probably shouldn’t have sworn at the stranger he runs into leaving Gansey’s favorite hipster coffee shop. Blue probably shouldn’t have tracked down Adam’s soulmate without his permission. But they did, and now all four of their lives are tangled up together, whether they like it or not.

Team #10: Strange as Angels

Fanfic: AO3 | Art: Tumblr

Writer: @skyermirth (tumblr)/skyermirth (AO3)

Artist: @squash1-squash2 (tumblr)

Beta: @galwaygremlin (tumblr)

Synopsis: Adam takes a job for the summer as Caretaker of the Barns, which local legend says is haunted. Adam soon finds out this is true when he meets the resident “ghost,” who isn’t very scary with his mohawk and grouchy demeanor but romantic heart. Falling in love with a ghost was not what Adam had planned for his summer. (Loosely based on the 1947 movie “The Ghost and Mrs. Muir”.)

Team #11: Dream Killer

Fanfic: AO3 | Art: Tumblr

Writer: @attentionhoard (tumblr)/mvsic_bxxks_stvdy (AO3)

Artist: @sinplaytheartist (tumblr)

Synopsis: Ronan Lynch is a man with extraordinary talents. If he can bring a living, breathing bird from a dream, what’s stopping him from bringing his best friend back from the grave? But some challenges are too great for one dreamer alone.

Team #12: Bread & Circuses

Fanfic: AO3 | Art: Instagram

Writer: @galwaygremlin (tumblr)/okay_pretender (AO3)

Artist: crystaline_art (instagram)

Beta: @inoctavo (tumblr)

Team #14: Ag iarraidh forais i bhfodhomhain

Fanfic: AO3 | forestgeit Art: Tumblr | homunculiii Art: Tumblr

Writer: @semicolonsandsimiles (tumblr)/semicolonsandsimiles (AO3)

Artist: @forestgeitart (tumblr)

Artist: @homunculiii (tumblr)

Beta: @g-reywaren (tumblr)/applepi314 (AO3)

Synopsis: Adam is more surprised that he came to Ireland at all than he is to find a doorway to the Otherworld. When Persephone gives you cryptic predictions about your future, you’re almost certainly about to stumble into some magic. And for all his exterior bluster, Ronan seems almost relieved to have someone to visit Tír na nÓg with. But things turn complicated quickly when, during what was supposed to be a quick trip through the doorway, they encounter Ronan’s little brother - who is definitely human and definitely in New York. When Adam ends up back in Ireland long term, he finds himself increasingly entangled in the magic of the Lynch bookshop, the Lynch family lore, and one Lynch in particular.

Team #15: See You Later Alligator

Fanfic: AO3 | Art: Instagram

Writer: @crostiina (tumblr)/crostiina (AO3)

Artist: fricklefracklefloof (instagram)

Beta: @creativefiend19 (tumblr)

Synopsis: “Adam.” he read out loud, because he didn’t know what else to do, because he was bad at conversation yet he definitely felt the need to say something.

He thought Adam was going to be even more annoyed and tell him off for being there and close and talking to him. He didn’t know why he did, maybe it was just that night messing with him, maybe it was just him never feeling right anywhere he went. Adam just shrugged.

“Told you I wasn’t Janine.”

Graduation year, Ronan Lynch is wasting his time with horrible friends and too many vices. Things change when he meets Adam Parrish, local (apparently) sane person and ambitious soul working the graveyard shift at a gas station’s market as he waits for acceptance letters to come. Somehow, they both happen to become the best part of the other person’s day.

Team #17: weekends are for the dogs

Fanfic: AO3 | Art: Tumblr

Writer: @royai (tumblr)/rizahawkaye (AO3)

Artist: @cheeriosnuggles (tumblr)

Synopsis: Ronan Lynch - fresh off the loss of his father, the truth of his Dreams - has so much to learn about himself, about Dreamers, about Niall, and about the black-coated wolf that tears its way through Henrietta.

Team #18: primavera

Fanfic: AO3 | Tumblr: Art

Writer: @manonblaccbeak (tumblr)/Imnotweirdjustwriting (AO3)

Artist: @gthechangeling (tumblr)

Beta: @pnrrish (tumblr)

Synopsis: the rebirth of Adam through art

OR: a renaissance AU featuring the gangsey

Team #19: trouble is (i don’t wanna let go)

Fanfic: AO3 | gouachemole Art: Tumblr | ladvy Art: Tumblr

Writer: @adverbialstarlight (tumblr)/adverbialstarlight (AO3)

Artist: @gouachemole (tumblr)

Artist: @ladvy (tumblr)

Beta: @violettfemme (tumblr)

Synopsis: It’s been two years since Henrietta’s infamous supervillain, Apothecary, disappeared from the streets and left the beloved hero Greywaren alone without his nemesis – and former secret lover. But now he’s back and determined, this time to team up and save the city from an even larger threat.

aka a pynch superhero au

Team #21: Love in the Time of Socialism

Fanfic: AO3 | Art 1: Tumblr | Art 2: Tumblr

Writer: @oldkingyounggod (tumblr)/aurumdalseni (AO3)

Artist: @effwit (tumblr)

Beta: @crostiina (tumblr)

Synopsis: This is a story about a magician with a terrible history. The death of Adam Parrish’s father after he leaves for college means a chance at closure with that part of his life, but he’s not on the journey alone. At his side is a king, whose loyalty never faltered, no matter how much the world threw at them, or how many times they couldn’t agree on how to live their lives. This is also the story of a dreamer, who loved his best friends so much that he didn’t dare risk losing them by asking for something they couldn’t give. So kisses that could have been became kisses that never were, and Ronan Lynch tells himself he’ll make his home a place they can return to. They’ll all come together again for Adam, even fierce little Blue Sargent, so he doesn’t have to face his past alone. And while he works at closing those doors, he’ll make his way into places where all the love Adam, Ronan and Gansey have built up over the years will finally have the space to bloom.

Team #22: we will raze this earth together

Fanfic: AO3 | Art: Tumblr

Writer: @teddylupin (tumblr)/perfect-porcelain (AO3)

Artist: @kojotei (tumblr)

Synopsis: Ronan is the heir to the Cabeswater throne, a mythical place that was thought to be lost to time. He is the only one of the late King Niall’s son to inherit the royal ability to shift into a dragon. He doesn’t want the throne. In his attempt to escape, he is captured and brought to the kingdom of Henrietta where the court magician, Adam is tasked with attempting to communicate with him, only Adam doesn’t know he has a human form. All Adam sees is the beautiful monstrosity that is Ronan.

Team #24: Heavy lies the head

Fanfic: AO3 | Art: Tumblr

Writer: @tinyarmedtrex (tumblr)/tinyarmedtrex (AO3)

Artist: @non-platonic-murphamy (tumblr)

Beta: @waywardsoul-s (tumblr)

Synopsis: Adam can’t stand the court magician, Ronan, but when his King sends the two of them on a quest Adam has no choice but to learn to work with the other man.

Team #25: A voice inside me sang your name

Fanfic: AO3 | Art: Tumblr

Writer: @maskingfragility (tumblr)/Fata_Morgana (AO3)

Artist: @pank0 (tumblr)

Beta: @campbraceyourself (tumblr)

Synopsis: Adam Parrish has recently gotten engaged, he works for a prestigious law firm in DC and he is about to be made partner. His life is millions miles away from the trailer park in Henrietta, he has accomplished all he has ever wanted, so when the call of an ancient, magical forest starts resonating inside him he is faced not just with his past, but with the possibility that his present is not what he really wants.

Team #27: Life is a Fucking Nightmare

Fanfic: AO3 | Art: Tumblr

Writer: @sterlynwrites (tumblr)/sterlynsilverrose (AO3)

Artist: @sinplaytheartist (tumblr)

Synopsis: We’ve All Read “Dream Thieves” at this point.

All the reader sees is the end of the nightmare of Joseph Kavinsky. But, what we don’t really see is exactly what leads up to that. This is an unapologetic look at Joseph Kavinsky and his daily life. It gives weight to the words:

“Life is a fucking nightmare.”

Team #31: The Creation of Adam

Fanfic: AO3 | Art: Tumblr

Writer: @pynches (tumblr)/clawsnbeak (AO3)

Artist: @purrsnicket (tumblr)

Beta: glam_reaper2 (AO3)

Synopsis: When Ronan Lynch enrolled in art school just to mess with his brother, he never thought he would actually be good at it. Now, with only a few months left before he is supposed to graduate, he has to turn in one of the biggest art pieces yet. Enter Adam Parrish, a poor student who wouldn’t say no to some extra money. When he saw an advertisement on Craigslist looking for a model to help with an art project, he didn’t hesitate to react. Working together seemed easy enough but there might be more between them than they bargained for.

Team #34: The Royal Treatment

Fanfic: AO3 | Art: Tumblr

Writer: @oldguybones (tumblr/Oldguybones (AO3)

Artist: @the-ronan-cycle (tumblr)

Synopsis: When Adam Parrish turned eighteen, he became the rightful heir to rule his home country of Henrietta. For years, he looked forward to taking over the nightmarish reign of his father and make the changes he wanted to see. But there was a huge problem. To officially hold the title, he first must wed and his foul mouthed, farm hand boyfriend, Ronan Lynch, knew nothing about royalty. Adam knew though, that there was no one better to rule by his side. So he must teach Ronan how to behave in the face of royalty without changing what he loved so dearly about him.

With time running out, will he be able to do that in time to gain the current King’s approval?

Team #38: and could you carry me through no man’s land

Fanfic: AO3 | Art: Tumblr

Writer: @mletart (tumblr)/mletart (AO3)

Artist: @wy-mackk (tumblr)

Beta: @stadamparrish (tumblr)

Synopsis: For The Raven Cycle 2020 Big Bang

In which Ronan Lynch gets himself into trouble with the High Council and Adam Parrish ends up taking Ronan on as his familiar. Adam learns the secrets of the Lynch family, and they both learn about magic and about each other. It goes a lot better than either of them would have expected at the start.

Team #39: Weirdos’ Voices

Fanfic: AO3 | Art: Tumblr

Writer: @flyde (tumblr)/parttimehuman (AO3)

Artist: @shamanda-lie (tumblr)

Synopsis: Without ever having seen the guy, Ronan is crushing hard on one of the construction workers renovating his building. Sitting against the door to his apartment, listening to the beautiful voice and oddly entertaining ramblings of a certain Ganseyboy, Ronan wonders what it would be like if they ever met. It happens when he least expects it…

Team #40: the first problem was putting us in charge of a kingdom

Fanfic: AO3 | Art: Tumblr 

Writer: @bipolarronanlynchevangelist (tumblr)/elliptical (AO3)

Artist: @turqidoodles (tumblr)/Turq_I (AO3)

Synopsis: Ronan Lynch loses control of his magic, which is the catalyst for a lot of shit, because he’s the first proven user of chaos magic in… basically ever. Gansey’s trying to be a good king despite his fears that there may be no such thing. Adam Parrish works beside him, earning his terrifying reputation through psychic study and occasional gray morality. Blue Sargent can’t leave her home or she’ll sicken and die, and her wanderlust is driving her to seek less-than-sensible solutions. Noah Czerny knows a lot about healing, but he’s not omnipotent, and he’s a little tired of being asked to clean up everyone else’s messes. Declan Lynch doesn’t trust the crown. He especially doesn’t trust the crown with his little brother. Mysteriously, all of this leads to rather a lot of conflict.

[whimsicallyenchantedrose]

Fluffy Fridays—Chapter 151: Brunch

Fluffy Fridays—Chapter 151: Brunch

Pairing:  Captain Swan

Summary:   A series of unrelated, fluffy one shots featuring Killian Jones and  Emma Swan and the relationship that makes us all swoon. Will contain  both canon and AU stories. My contribution to Operation Rainbow Kisses  and Unicorn Stickers (aka, my attempt to drown out the season 4 finale  angst with ridiculous levels of fluff.)

Other Chapters: ( 1) ( 2) ( 3) ( 4) ( 5) (6) ( 7) ( 8) ( 9) ( 10) ( 11) ( 12) (13) (14) (15) (16) (17) (18) (19) (20) (21) (22) (23) (24) (25) (26) (27) (28) (29) (30) (31) (32) (33) (34) (35) (36) (37) (38) (39) (40) (41) (42) (43) (44) (45) (46) (47) (48) (49) (50) (51) (52) (53) (54) (55) (56) (57) (58) (59) (60) (61) (62) (63) (64) (65) (66) (67) (68) (69) (70) (71) (72) (73) (74) (75) (76) (77) (78) (79) (80) (81) (82) (83) (84) (85) (86) (87) (88) (89) (90) (91) (92) (93) (94) (95) (96) (97) (98) (99) (100) (101) (102) (103) (104) (105) (106) (107) (108) (109) (110) (111) (112) (113) (114) (115) (116) (117) (118) (119) (120) (121) (122) (123) (124) (125) (126) (127) (128) (129) (130) (131) (132) (133) (134) (135) (136) (137) (138) (139) (140) (141) (142) (143) (144) (145) (146) (147) (148) (149) (150) (152) (153) (154) (155) (156) (157) (158) (159) (160) (161) (162) (163) (164) (165) (166) (167) (168) (169) (170) (171) (172) (173) (174)

(ao3) (ff.net)

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Brunch

CS Future Fic

A/N: This story was originally posted as a rather silly (but very fluffy) stand-alone story.

She was going to kill him.  She really was.  She was going to kill him, and this time she was totally leaving him in the Underworld.  She’d be a widow before she was 35.

“Do tell, Dave,” Killian said, stupid smirk on his stupid face, “what precisely is your secret for the perfect pancake?”

“Oh my gods,” Emma said under her breath as her mom hid her face in her hands.

Not long after Henry went off on his adventure, Emma and Killian had started a tradition with her parents of having family brunch on Saturday mornings.  Today was one such brunch, and her husband was evidently trying to make her die of embarrassment.

“The perfect amount of spice,” her dad answered, totally oblivious to what her idiot husband was doing.  “You don’t want bland pancakes, but if you add a bit of spice to the mix, it just makes everything better.  I must have found the perfect recipe last time.  My pancakes actually had Snow moaning.”

Emma coughed on the sip of coffee she’d just--very unwisely--taken.  Killian slapped her on the back, grinning down at her with a devilish wink.

“Moaning is most definitely a good sign,” Killian said. “Wouldn’t you agree, my love?”

She glared at him, imagining all the magical ways she could shut him up.  Maybe she’d just turn him into a frog.

Killian sent her another wink.  “I must have stumbled upon the perfect...er...recipe myself, Dave.  The last time Swan and I made pancakes she nearly screamed in delight.”

Emma kicked him under the table, and if Snow got any redder she might just burst into flames.

Dad laughed, still blissfully ignorant.  “Yeah, that sounds like Emma.  Give her food and she’ll love you forever.”

Killian nodded his head in mock seriousness.  “I’d never dream of depriving my lovely wife of...food.  I make it a point to provide it for her at minimum four times a week, though early on, it was every day.”

“Make it stop.  Gods, make it stop!” Snow muttered to herself before turning imploring eyes to Emma.

Emma shrugged helplessly.  When Killian had that look in his eyes--like a mischievous child--there was no controlling him.

Thus the reason she was going to kill him. Slowly.

“Tell me, Killian,” David said, spearing another bite of his pancake, “is it just the pancakes with you or do you add some kind of breakfast meat to the mix?”

Snow buried her head in her hands once more.

“Breakfast meat is an absolute must in my experience, Dave,” Killian said.  “Emma seems particularly fond of sausage.”

Emma stomped on his foot and Snow “accidentally” slapped his head when she reached for the maple syrup.

“Though it’s not always just pancakes, you know.  Coffee is involved as well, and I’ve heard tell you’re quite partial to tacos.

”Dad’s brow furrowed.  “Tacos for breakfast?”

Killian shrugged.  “Who am I to judge?  When you want to make tacos, you want to make tacos.”

“Gross, Killian!” Emma moaned.  “I do not need to know about my parents’ taco making habits.”

Finally, finally catching on that there was something more going on than met the eye, her dad looked from one of them to the other.  “Snow, is it just me, or am I missing something here?”

Snow leaned down to whisper in her husband’s ear.

That was the last day her dad ever made pancakes.

Tacos….well, that remained something she most definitely did not want to know about.

Notes:

--Hi everyone, I’m back!  A year and a half ago, back in July of 2019, I decided to end this Fluffy Fridays collection kind of arbitrarily (150 chapters seemed to be a nice, even number), but in July of 2019, I had no way of knowing what a total dumpster fire 2020 would be (and 2021 doesn’t seem to be starting any better).  Given all the terrible things everyone seems to be going through, I decided we need a little fluff in our lives more than ever.  And so Fluffy Fridays is back.  I make no promises about how often I’ll update, and it almost definitely won’t be every week, but as long as I have fluffy CS ideas, I’ll keep writing them.

--Up next:  No clue. I still have a few story ideas in my mental vault, but if this collection is going to continue much longer, I’ll need your help.  Send me your fluffy prompts to help jump start the muse!

                                                                                     NEXT CHAPTER-->

[thewhitefluffyhat]

No, Alina Isn’t Crazy

Let me explain...

When Alina was first introduced, I thought she was the character that made the least sense as an actual person rather than as a trope-y “mad artist” archetype.  But after the reveal of her backstory, I find her personality and motivations do make sense, especially when you consider the events of Alina’s Magical Girl Story from her perspective.  

Indeed, since that story’s release on JP, she’s quickly risen to become my favorite new character from Magia Record.  Hence why I’m posting this today - it’s another semi-Magia Rapport related post, haha.  Alina is definitely my favorite of the Forest element characters, and perhaps this essay will show a little of why that is.

Provocative title and Magia Rapport aside, though, what’s actually below the "Keep reading” is a close read analysis essay, specifically focused on Alina’s MGS.  (A lot of Holy Alina’s MGS serves to confirm and reinforce little points scattered throughout this too, but this post was long enough without it!)

Introduction

The theme of Alina’s own art might be “Alina’s beauty” and “life, death, and emotion/decay.”  But I would argue that the theme of her MGS as a when taken as a short story is “voyeurism and objectification at the cost of self-identity.”  Specifically, how Alina’s actions and personality are the logical conclusion to that concept taken to an extreme.

There’s one important truth to Alina’s world, and that is the idea that Alina’s art IS Alina.  We see it at the start – when she says her art is what she enjoys and what she grasps with her own hands.  We see it at the end – with her realization that her art’s theme is “Alina’s beauty.”

And at the end of the day, what MGS Alina most seems to want is to be left alone to do art, to be herself.  But who is Alina?

Alina the Teen Prodigy

Unfortunately for Alina, her fame gets in the way of figuring that out.  Such is the life of a teen prodigy.  As perhaps can be expected, constantly parading children under a spotlight is a great recipe for turning out extremely high-strung kids with very warped self-esteem.

(See also: Nemu, but especially Touka.)

The exchange regarding the award here is a good illustration of that mindset.  It might initially seem contradictory for Alina to work desperately hard to win an award that she later doesn’t want and claims she wasn’t aiming to win.  But once being “gifted” becomes central to your identity, winning an award doesn’t feel good anymore.  It feels more like running in place, just the bare minimum expected of you to maintain your identity as a genius.  And Alina’s perfectionism means she can’t not hold herself to that standard.

Indeed, Alina is already showing signs that she’s struggling under the pressure and overexposure.  Normally, Alina seems to love talking about art and her own works (as long as it isn’t about herself, anyway).  Arguing with her teacher and running away are far more of a bother and interfere with her ability to get back to painting far more than a quick meeting would have been.  Yet she curses at her teacher, bolts, and skips school rather than have to deal with the consequences of her fame again.

She’s irrationally lashing out, asserting her boundaries in whatever way she can. And with the way the characters react, this doesn’t even seem like the first time it’s happened, either...

Which suggests Alina’s problems with her fame also aren’t new.  When we first meet her, Alina is already a lot closer to a breakdown than she appears on the surface.

Having natural talent from an early age, Alina probably hasn’t learned how to deal with failure without spiraling into a full blown identity crisis.  As a perfectionist, she’s also hypersensitive to even the slightest mistake.  And given that she’s been famous for a few years at this point, her acting out is practically expected.

Just given the setting that she’s a well-known child prodigy, it’s not surprising that Alina has all these traits.

Alina’s Adults Are Useless

What is a bit disturbing, though, is that adults around Alina aren’t any help in protecting her from her fame.

Indeed, from what we see, the pattern is the opposite - over and over, the supposedly “responsible” adults in Alina’s life say her visibility matters more than her consent.  Her teacher pressures her into competitions she dislikes and then gets on her case when she pushes back.  Her parents put up her whole life story, including photos of her as a kid, without Alina’s approval or even permission. 

Jumping ahead, I think it’s rather telling that Alina manages to destroy all her art, commit suicide, and get rescued by a third party – and none of these adults even visit her.  A popular theory is that Alina’s parents are travelling in a different country.  But - did no one tell them?  Did they not care?  As it is, anything Alina does – even blatant red flags like destroying a classroom and her own art – is treated as just another work of artistic genius, to be advertised and exhibited.  

(Because apparently nothing says High Art like creep shots of a teenage girl having a mental breakdown.)

Of course, Alina isn’t being neglected or abused like Sana or Yuma.  Not even close.  But she’s not in a great situation either.  She doesn’t really have anyone she can turn to in a crisis.  The adults in her life mostly use her for their own ends, reinforcing that her worth is in her fame as an artist, not her value as a person.

Alina’s Peers Aren’t Much Better

Then, on a more subtle level, there are Alina’s peers.  Whenever she’s mentioned by people her own age, she’s either the subject of scary rumors or glowing admiration.  Other kids know her as a celebrity name to be idolized or feared, not a person.  

Before becoming a magical girl, the only person who actually makes an effort to befriend Alina is Karin.  But even she is initially caught up in the aura of Alina’s fame and contributes to the swirl of gossip around her.

The result is a situation where everyone around Alina has their own opinion on who she is.  No one seems to care or leave space for who Alina wants herself to be.  And Alina, not having a social life to fall back on, is increasingly left with “genius artist” as the only means she has to interact with the world.  It’s a self-reinforcing spiral.

The Critic’s Letter

First, what it’s not: this isn’t about Alina getting a bad review and not being able to handle criticism of her work.  She’s already won the competition.  And Alina is perfectionistic to unhealthy levels - she’s already her own worst critic.

Rather, the letter’s insinuations are both subtler and crueler.  As Alina says, the critic isn’t concerned with her artwork - he’s commenting on Alina as a person.   Thus, the critic’s words are the same pattern as before, now crystallized into its sharpest and purest form.

Alina’s internal sense of identity is precariously fragile.  Meanwhile, Alina’s external identity is being used as a canvas for other people’s desires.  Even though all Alina really wants is to create art for her own sake, other people obsess over and dump their own meaning (or lack of meaning) onto her works.

Once again, Alina’s art is conflated with Alina herself.  The person is being evaluated as a piece of art.

As if that wasn’t enough, the letter’s final insinuation that Alina is losing her brilliance is a triple threat.  If she can’t create great art, Alina loses the activity she enjoys most. She also loses the one thing she knows other people value her for.  And worst of all, she loses the only touchpoint she has for her sense of self.

Cue existential crisis.  Alina’s life is Alina’s art.  Alina’s art is Alina life.   Without one, she doesn’t have any concept of the other.  

And in the light of all this, her suicide makes perfect sense. 

Alina’s Suicide

Welcome to the literal and figurative objectification of Alina.  Literal, in that she’s turning into a corpse.  Figurative in that by putting her body up for display, she’s allowing people to voyeuristically consume it –  an idea further reinforced by the “Kusouzu / Nine Phases” reference in the title implying a tinge of sexual objectification as well. 

Now that she’s destroyed all of her previous works, the only thing Alina leaves her audience to look at is Alina herself.  Filming her body as it turns from a person into a dead object was simply the logical conclusion to a life of being displayed, objectified, and overwritten by others’ perceptions.  

But how does Alina feel about this ending?

The day of her suicide, Alina rushes around in a kind of manic euphoria.  This isn’t especially odd.  After all, it’s not uncommon for a suicidal person to outwardly appear happier before they make an attempt, as finally having a concrete plan of action can feel like a huge relief.  

Dying means a solution to Alina’s worries about her talent fading.  Dying also means an end to all the pressure, all the constant struggle of performing to ever-heightening expectations.  Alina can simply abandon the cases and tools once she’s done with them - no need to stress about the future when she won’t have one.

Alina’s farewell, though, betrays darker emotions.  It’s simultaneously deeply spiteful - “this is what you all wanted from me, are you happy now?” - yet also an admission of utter defeat.  Alina is giving up her very humanity and selfhood to be evaluated as whatever her audience wants.

Throughout the story, everyone keeps telling Alina that her art is intoxicating, pulling the viewer into it… but the reality is the exact opposite.  Alina’s art was just something Alina made for herself, and any intoxicating meaning was something the viewer injected into it.  

And thus, Alina’s revelation.  Alina’s theme is “Alina’s beauty” – both a rejection and an embrace of that objectification.  Now, Alina has declared that her art loudly and unabashedly about herself, viewer projection be damned.  And yet, at the same time, since “Alina” is what viewers are obsessed with seeing, then Alina will give them exactly what they want…

An Artistic Failure?

So then why does Alina consider her final art to be a failure?  It fits well within the theme of “Alina’s beauty.”   Indeed, her later works like “Humanity’s Implicit Reward” and even her swimsuit are arguably just softer variations of the “Alina’s body as forbidden yet alluring object for the viewer to consume” idea that is present here.

This suicide also seems to fit into the “life and death” motifs she has.  It’s a twisted kind of resurrection - effectively, she’s killing herself as a human in order to live on eternally as a memorable piece of art.

Alina plans her final work directly because she thinks she’s dying as a creator.  Rather than face her brilliance fading, she chooses to defy it by going out in a blaze of glory.  And when put that way, it’s an exciting and fitting conclusion.  

There’s just one little problem with that narrative...

While drifting between life and death, Alina realizes the critic was wrong.  She had a theme all along.  Alina’s brilliance wasn’t fading.

And thus, since she wasn’t a “dying artist,” her “going out in a blaze of glory” no longer holds any profound meaning.  She’s just a silly teenager who got too worked up over a harsh letter.

The overall concept behind Alina’s last work wasn’t the issue.  The failure was in the timing and execution, killing herself before such a thing had meaning and in a way such that her body would be found.

And so, I don’t think Alina has learned her lesson here.  I don’t think Karin’s words have gotten through to her yet.  If she concludes at a later point that her talent is truly is fading or that she’s lost her theme, I’d fully expect her to pull another suicidal stunt again.

Conclusion

So the good news: Alina lived!  She’ll have plenty more chances to create art and figure herself out!

But the bad news: Alina’s revelation implies she’s now even more reliant on her identity as a genius artist.  

And thus, like so many other characters, the end to Alina’s MGS isn’t really an ending. She hasn’t solved the problem at the heart of the crisis that led to her wish.  Becoming a magical girl and discovering witches does nothing to stop Alina from falling into another identity spiral, nor has she left her suicidal tendencies behind.

Alina found her theme, but she still hasn’t found herself.

Misc Details

Some other neat miscellaneous details that fit with this interpretation:

I’m glad the English translation keeps at least a little of the quirky way Alina refers to herself.  (That being said, in Japanese, it’s even more exaggerated - she doesn’t use normal first person pronouns at all, only using “Alina.” )

Because on the one hand, this is an obvious hint at her extreme narcissism: Alina’s sentences frequently emphasize her name.

On the other hand, it’s a great subtle detail to return to the theme of objectification.  To put it another way, Alina refers to herself in third-person.  That is, even when Alina is speaking about herself, she reflexively frames it from the point of view of another person.  Because Alina is constantly having other people’s perspectives forced onto her!

Also, it turns out the pattern of others projecting onto Alina is present in her witch as well!  “Old Dorothy” is a historical figure whose diaries have been analyzed by multiple different researchers.  Some of them came to the conclusion that Dorothy was definitely a witch, others came to the conclusion she was definitely a normal, upstanding member of her community.  The researchers got completely opposite results from the same exact diaries.  So therefore - did they truly care about learning what Dorothy was really like?  Or were they just out to prove their own theories?

(Two years in, Old Dorothy is even more fitting of a name.  Doroinu basically predicted the entire fan response to Alina.  Some people see her as an evil (w)itch, some people see her as a sympathetic figure - all from looking at the same text.

We’re even starting to see the “two sides” of Alina come up in the Main Story, with Karin’s subplot in Arc 2.)

Meanwhile, Old Dorothy’s form - a “paint tube” - carries both this “paint over with your perceptions” meaning while also suggesting the same story as Alina’s final piece in miniature.  

Unlike Izabel, Alina’s witch form isn’t that of an artist.  Because when Alina hits her lowest point of despair, she no longer considers herself to be an artist.  She believes the only value she has left is to become literal materials to create art.  

In other words, Old Dorothy is Alina turning herself into art again.  It’s just rainbow paint this time instead of red.

Last but not least: yes, I am absolutely aware of the irony of this essay.   Here I am rambling about how Alina’s story is all about her struggle to be herself while everyone seems determined to erase her in favor of their own projections – and yet  a good chunk of this interpretation is probably my projecting on her.   Whoops!

Still, even if you disagree with it, I hope this essay was interesting and maybe made you question some of your assumptions about Alina.  

Thanks for reading!

[twdmusicboxmystery]

Chess Theory 2.0

This theory comes from a discussion me and my fellow theorists had after this ask was posted:

I really love the idea of the black and white representing the battle between the CRM and the Commonwealth. We can’t know for sure if it does, but given everything leading up to this point in the story, it definitely could. My fellow theorists and I had extensive discussions about this, with @wdway especially contributing a lot of thoughts and research.

@wdway:

Starting with the ask, I love it so much and believe they could be quite right that the black could represent the CRM and the white the Commonwealth, and they could be at odds with one another and our group. TF will be caught in the middle.

Since I feel strongly that Beth could be tied to Eugene's group’s storyline, that would make her white. Rick we know is with the CRM, which makes him black. If both Beth and Rick are fighting independently within these two groups and that would make them neither black nor white but gray. This is the part that I've said for quite a while: that gray represents a middle ground, it's neither black nor white.

Beth and Rick in Coda. I chose this shot because they almost look like one unit. Both in gray from behind so that Beth's yellow shirt is not a distraction to the gray that ties these two characters together.

I also love the fact that the red machete could easily belong to either one in this shot. And with a thought that colors have different meanings for different scenes, I believe in this particular case, the gray represents that the scene is not as black-and-white, as clear cut as it seems, that there are things going on here that the viewers are not aware of. It has shades of grey for these two characters. 

Also, it could tell us why Daryl wore one white leg tie and one black leg tie. They represent the two people that he loves and will lose, believing they are both dead. He will search for them both and not be able to find either one.

Twdmusicboxmystery: Breaking into @wdway’s thoughts here just to have a wowza moment. Can you see how they’ve set this up from the start? Can you see how it lines up? Okay, back to @wdway:

@wdway​:

I simply could not go back to the hall scene in Coda without watching Daryl carry Beth out. This time I noticed something that I had never noticed before. @Frangipanilove, this one is especially up your alley. Look at the walkway right behind Daryl. On the left side, there is two parallel lines =. On the other right side is a directional symbol <. How have we not noticed this before?

I then wanted to look at the Commonwealth soldiers, so I went to the episode 16, when Eugene's group is surrounded and again I noticed something that I didn't before. 

PM 110 and RX 04. I'll start with RX, we have always attached the "X" to Beth, it can also stand for the number 10, and it has multiple meanings. When paired with an R (which could possibly stand for Rick) RX is a medical or drug symbol used for a Latin word, "recipe" meaning "to take." Yes I Googled it. I'm not sure about the PM but 101 is the series number for s8e11, Dead or Alive Or.

@twdmusicboxmystery: Breaking in again to point out that Dead or Alive Or was one of the episode titles mentioned during the Cast Trivia Battle I posted about a few days ago. Just saying.

 @wdway:

It's the episode that is so very full of Beth symbols that it's not even funny. There also Tara and Dwight's conflict and Daryl trying to take the children/people of AZ to Hilltop. 

I do want to note in the photograph above if you look at the desk you see droplets of black paint against the white top. Like I said, every symbol that we can imagine for Beth is pretty much in that episode.

@frangipanilove​:

Love this! It actually does get my mind spinning. I had to google the meaning of PM and the literal meaning is the Latin “post meridiem”, which of course translates to “after noon”. We have all these Dawn references and midnight references and clocks etc on TWD, so an “after noon” reference doesn’t seem entirely out of place. I’ve been obsessed with ep 8x11 for a multitude of reasons. A bunch of Sirius references, the green Jaguar car, the Sirius piggy bank, FGs blindness, animal traps.

Mostly I’m obsessed about it because the original Noah’s t-shirt theory pointed to 8x2, when we saw the blue heron painting, but I later realized that the “2” could also point to 8x11. The radio shack is a huge Sirius symbol in and of itself, and it even ties into ep 10x11 “morning star” (Venus/Sirius reference). I’ve never noticed the = symbol and the < symbol behind Daryl. It’s incredible that we can still discover new things in episodes we’ve watched a thousand and one times already.

@twdmusicboxmystery:

One thing I keep circling back to is the Governor because the white, king chess piece was so obviously a symbol for him. And I do think they used that specifically for his arc, but that doesn’t mean it wasn’t a foreshadow of another, bigger, future arc. And there was SO much Beth symbolism around him, especially in 4x06. And his chess piece was white, not black.

@wdway:

I've already gone back and started searching some things and have some ideas that will connect Beth with white and Rick with black symbolically that I'm excited about. I've already solved the problem of the white chess piece connected to the governor and I think you will love my findings.

I was thinking about the gray and Beth’s sweater and Rick's shirt in Coda, when suddenly I remembered that it was not Beth's first sweater. Her first sweater we saw in Still and it was white.

Now, this sweater has been talked about a lot through the years. White typically stands for purity, both in body and in mind and I think you can we can use both for Beth in this example. 

When Beth stands next to the Rich Bitch walker, I think it's a matter of purity of the heart. The Rich Bitch, although outwardly she's in white. she was not a person with a pure heart. What color a person wears on the outside doesn't necessarily reflect in color of their soul. Not all white is good not all black is bad.

Shortly after Beth put on the white sweater, she is covered in blood and she removes it. You would still call it a white sweater, but it has stains that cannot be removed. Her soul will always be white, but she will have strains that cannot be removed. The next time we see her in a sweater it will be a light gray, more white than black. It represents coming to grips in the world that she is in now and will be in the future.

The challenge is, if Beth represents white, what does that mean about the Governor’s white chess piece? We know the Gov was not pure of heart, so how could he be white?

When the Governor originally found the chess board and was teaching Megan the game, he is black. It was Megan that draws that eye patch on the white king because outwardly he seemed to be pure of heart, but he was not. It was an illusion. He was a black king chess piece. So, what about the fact that Rick is black, does that make him a villain? Does he have an evil heart? I believe that Rick has always struggled with his dark demons. It's in the fact that he desires to be noble and good, even though he can do bad things, his desire is pure, to have a white heart.

The next couple of shots was just confirmation that Beth will appear as white and Rick as black. Her shoes from Slabtown. 

One shoelace is white, the other is black. When I went back to look at the shoelaces, for the first time I realized that her shoes are gray. Love that.

This, I'm sure you will recognize as being from Coda, just before the exchange of prisoners. 

I'm always harping about the fact that diamond shape represents Beth, a square represents Rick. You can turn the square on its side, and it becomes a diamond. If you go back and look at the chessboard, it's a huge indication that I'm correct. If you look at the board from one angle it is blocks of squares if you look at it slightly from the side, it's diamonds.

So here, Beth is in the hallway and she will end up standing in the middle of the white diamond on top of the black square. Beth and Rick could have similar but different stories. They’re both in rebel groups, fighting for the same type of cause but in different locations. I think if that's the case, especially with Beth, we could see her appearing to be on the inside, a villain type, but in reality, more of a double agent.

They showed us in Slabtown how she could manipulate and play the game that she had to in order to survive and get what she needed.

This picture is from Dead Weight, from the cabin that the Gov searched. There are a lot of Native American symbols in that cabin and this one stood to me. It is a dreamcatcher.

This next picture is of the room in WHWGO, I'll remind you that on the corner post of the bed is a small dreamcatcher.

I think this links the two episodes together. It's hard to imagine that they would put so much symbolism and foreshadowing all in one episode, so they spread it out over several episodes and seasons. In this bottom shot, we have a black helmet sitting on top of some type of communication equipment, a telescope for gazing at the stars, a poster about science fiction with a rocket on it, a small toy helicopter on the side table. And of course we have the Dreamcatcher which imo is pointing to the next stage of clues. The other things that tie this episode and the Gov's episodes together.

 Hard to get any bigger tie than the Governor himself, surrounded with military and water symbols.

Maybe there is another symbol that could tie this to the past and future storylines. 

A shot of the Gov and Beth together in this room. Even though he is not in this shot, Rick later, at the end of episode, comes into this room. Rick, Beth, and the Gov at some point are surrounded in this room with a helicopter, rockets, airplanes, and a ton of water symbols.

What did I hear you ask? But there are no chess objects? That might be true in a material way, but I believe the conversation between Ty and the Gov was definitely a chess play, a game of strategy, moving back and forth, a power-play of sorts.

So that's all I have for you right now.

@twdmusicboxmystery:

Love all this! When I was putting together my Divine Comedy Theory, I was thinking about AOW (because that’s when we saw the “Abandon all hope…” sign) and that maybe AOW was a type of the CW vs CRM war. Most of the major conflicts probably have been. The fall of the prison. AOW. Certainly TF vs the Whisperers. Maybe even Terminus. This idea is just making me re-think everything. I’m sure if we went back and rewatched, we’d see more clues than ever.

@wdway:

There was one thing that I meant to mention from Live Bait. In the nursing home, we see the woman in the yellow wheelchair. She is wearing a white gown with black trim. She had marks on her feet to make her a Christ symbol figure and we've always connected her with Beth because of the yellow chair.

Now I'm thinking she could represent white/Commonwealth and black/CRM. Because now we not only have Beth as a Christ figure symbol, but we have Rick also. Something that we did not have before the last couple of seasons. It seems easier to connect Beth to the color white. We have been doing that for years and thinking she could be at the Commonwealth and could be a part of Eugene's storyline fits with what could be coming.

Rick is harder when looking to past seasons and connecting him to the color black, but we know for certain that he was taken by the helicopter people and been told by tptb that he is with the CRM. From all that we've seen, their military color is black.

@twdmusicboxmystery:

Just want to point out that in 8x12, The Key, there’s definitely a black theme going on. Rick crashes a black car, 

everything in the basement he and Negan go into is black, Negan is wearing a black coat, 

(I don’t think Rick’s shirt is black, but it’s dark enough to look black here:)

and even the sign, “Abandon All Hope Ye Who Enter Here” is written in black. 

We’ve always knew this was foreshadow of Rick’s disappearance in the helicopter group and it does suggest a black theme.

The other thing I noticed is that in the pic of Beth’s shoelaces, it’s specifically the WHITE lace/shoe was spattered with blood, just like her white sweater in Still. 

So, those two symbols are probably synonymous. I don’t have much to add for how to interpret that beyond what we’ve already said, but it’s interesting. But I guess this is the other thing I was thinking about the Gov’s S4 episodes. And there’s no way to know this for sure. But because we saw Native American stuff in the cabin he stayed in, and also around the Wolves, and both of those are heavily paralleled to Beth, I guess I’m wondering if the Native American stuff will somehow be fulfilled in this CW/CRM war stuff.

@wdway:

I love that you mentioned the blood spatter on Beth's white sweater and the shoe with the white laces. I made note of it and meant to mention it and forgot. Another thing that came to my mind in looking at the Native American stuff in the cabin is it reminded me of Ezekiel in past seasons wearing feathers in his hair. He is now with Eugene and company being held by the Commonwealth and needing medical attention.

I know it may just be wishful thinking but when we first saw the Kingdom it screamed Beth. At Grady, we saw Beth in a medical setting, learning from Dr. Edwards being his assistant which in the dead world is the new form of medical school. Fast forward, if she is with the Commonwealth it would be more than likely in some kind of medical position with the possibility of Beth and Ezekiel meeting. And gives a purpose to the painting of Beth at Hilltop to be recognized by Ezekiel. There's the question of did Eugene see Beth at Grady or was he still unconscious, if so then there again the painting.

@twdmusicboxmystery:

I love the Zeke/feather tie. Side note: I have ALL kinds of head canons of Beth and Ezekiel meeting and swapping stories about Daryl and Carol.

@wdway:

Yes! Can't help but think that Ezekiel, Carol's husband and the love of her life and Daryl's love Beth could possibly meet in the Commonwealth. That this could lead to them all coming together and then torn apart. My headcanon is that something will happen, probably to do with his cancer and Ezekiel will be sent out west and Beth will go with him. I can imagine their first meeting, Elijah keeps looking at Beth asking, do I know you, you look so familiar. And they start talking about the fact that Beth is from Georgia and it all comes together. Please don't let the writers pass up this great opportunity, especially when it seems that they've been setting this up the whole time.

@twdmusicboxmystery:

Yeah for sure! Love that! I’ve always thought about maybe him mentioning that his wife is named Carol. And maybe she doesn’t even think it’s the one she knows bc more than one person can be named Carol, right? But through conversation or more details, just as your head canon above, they realize this is the Carol she knows. Scenes like these would be so much fun!

@frangipanilove:

You guys discussed the blood on Beth’s white cardigan and on the shoe with white laces. It’s actually something I’ve thought about before, though I still don’t know what the most precise interpretation of it should be. But I’ve mentioned that I believe shoe/leg/foot references allude to the trunk of a car (because boot is Australian and British for trunk). Also, I believe that TPTB sometimes use the human trunk to allude to the trunk of a car (the upper body walkers coming out of the back of a car in WHAWGO, the library guy hanging from a bridge that had an x painted on his upper body, Beth’s blue hospital scrubs, Noah’s t-shirt and loads more).

Well, we see Beth get blood spatter on her upper body in Still, and we see the shoe with the white laces get a similar type of blood spatter in Slabtown. These could be trunk references.

How should we interpret it then? I don’t have anything groundbreaking on that. Just that it appears to be further evidence of an injured Beth somehow ending up in the trunk/back of a car. So basically, not anything I didn’t already believe in, but it certainly fits the symbolism language.

That’s pretty much what I have to add to the chess theory for now. As you can see, our conversations can meander and include things like headcanons. (I’d love to tell you we’re all symbolism business all the time, but that’s just not true. ;D). Anyway, hope this gets you all excited for what’s to come. It’s only a theory for now, but as you can see, there’s some pretty compelling evidence. I’ve said for a long time that the show is pointing toward some HUGE conflict in the future, and since Rick disappeared, I’ve known it would be the helicopter people. But until Nonny sent in that ask, I’d never considered that maybe the black and white theme might be pointing to it, too. Awesome!

[mannatea]

Can I ask why the education traumatizes students? I'm just curious.

I don’t wanna make a long-winded overblown post about this because I feel like other posts on Tumblr have expressed it better than I could, or at least more succinctly lol, so i’ll just say one of the biggest contributing factors in the public american education system is probably:

Overcrowding.

When I say overcrowding is a problem, I mean 35+ children in a classroom under the supervision of one teacher. It has been proven time and time again that this is a recipe for poor education but I am going to say it again: this is a recipe for poorly educating your children. Think about it this way: I have eight cats. I barely have the time to pay all eight of them a good amount of attention for the duration of time I am given each day to spend with them. Now imagine I have up to FIVE TIMES THAT MANY CATS. Do you think they are getting the care and attention and help that they need? Do you think I will be able to figure out who has a bladder problem? Who has an ear infection? Whose hips hurt and who needs a ramp or set of stairs for accessibility? I’m gonna miss some problems and some cats are going to suffer greatly for that neglect, intentional or no. 

35 cats seems like an overwhelming amount of cats, but for some reason it’s fine to have that many HUMAN CHILDREN IN ONE SPACE. Can you give four children the amount of attention and guidance and help they need every day? Just four? It’s hard. But now remember that many classrooms have 35+ children in them and they are under the supervision and guidance of ONLY ONE PERSON, which can lead to all the sorts of trauma related to this:

Bullying from other students, particularly during times where the children are not supervised well or at all.

Tired & underpaid teachers who don’t have the time or resources to help with the education aspect of it OR the bullying that goes on, which may end up with teachers being and acting stressed, perhaps even snapping at students for not understanding something, and then those students become afraid to admit they don’t know something/ask questions in the future.

Being ostracized/set to work on something different than the rest of the class which forces you to stand out

Special needs/accommodations are easily missed, resulting in fewer children getting the help they need, be it for ADHD, learning disabilities, or vision impairment.

I could go on. So many students also means less time for teachers to grade, less rest for teachers to recharge, more reliance on overarching lesson plans instead of being able to focus a little more on the things some students might be struggling with, et cetera.

If you were lucky enough to go to a school that had small classrooms, this may sound insane to you, but it’s very common in the USA, and bullshit like Common Core and Super Special Math Requirements to Graduate have been getting increasingly worse. I noped out of the education sector because it was depressing, because I knew I couldn’t handle the stressful environment, the shitty pay, the inability to monitor the children appropriately, and aLL OF THAT WHILE THE FUTURE OF THOSE KIDS WAS SITTING ON MY SHOULDERS.

Do we want well-educated children? If the answer is yes, why do we pay teachers like that? Why do we give them massive classrooms and then punish them when they struggle to teach the students? Gee, I wonder why so many teachers burn out. Gee, I wonder why so many students end up afraid to ask questions, think that learning is a miserable experience, and feel stupid when they don’t understand a task or directions given to them at work 20 years later.

Like. It’s just so obvious to me. We don’t value education in this country. We don’t value the work teachers do. We don’t give a good goddamn about learning OR about making learning a fun and engaging experience.

And then we are baffled when someone in their 40s or 50s or 60s comes to work and is afraid to admit they don’t understand the directions you just gave them. I don’t know. Maybe because when they were 4, 5, 6, 7, and 8, they got laughed at for not being able to read well, or for misunderstanding directions, or for answering a question incorrectly, and they spent the rest of their life just nodding and keeping their head down to avoid looking stupid and drawing attention to themselves. ‘Cause it’s not like this experience is singular, like, “hah yeah I had one teacher like that once.” It’s shockingly universal in this country. And I am of the opinion that the biggest contributing factor to this is paying teachers shit wages and making them babysit FAR too many kids than they are able to teach WELL.

[bltngames]

SAGE 2020: Fan Games

I’d hoped to have this article out a little bit sooner, but I overestimated how long it would take to write about some of these games. Whoops! Like I said when I outlined the posting “schedule” on the first day, we’re playing it fast and loose, so this is just what you get.

Today is the day I talk about fan games! And even though SAGE has “Sonic” right there in the acronym, it’s always hosted fan games from all types, so today we’ve got Mega Man, Mario, Rayman, and even fan games of fan games, if you can believe it.

Sonic Pinball Panic!

Pinball is one of those things where I’ve always been obsessed with it, but never very good at it. And now, with access to digital pinball collections like Pinball Arcade and Pinball FX, I don’t actually find myself playing as much pinball as I thought I would when I was 14 years old. Still, I find myself fascinated by a good pinball table, and this honestly caught me off guard. This could very easily be an official DLC release for one of those aforementioned pinball collections and I wouldn’t even bat an eyelash (in fact, if you ask me, this is better than Pinball FX, which has always had weird ball physics). This looks, sounds, and functions exactly like a real pinball table should. My complaints are minor: for starters, the table feels kind of easy. I’ve never been a pinball wizard, but I was losing balls left and right here and it still took a good 15 minutes before I finally got a game over. Score accumulation is also pretty slow; most pinball tables will dump millions and millions of points on you, but here, it felt like a struggle just to reach the 379k I finished with. Both contribute to the fact that the table feels a little flat, like it’s missing a spark to really put it over the top. And, third, it would be nice if it had controller support. The keyboard works just fine, here (it’s just pinball, after all) but I find that the triggers on a controller feel really good with pinball flippers, and mapping the plunger to the right stick is great, too. This is a Unity game, so I wouldn’t think it’d be that hard to hook it up to the controller mapper. Still, I came away impressed.

Mega Man: Perfect Blue

There are two things out there that always give me pause: fan-made Doom level packs, and Mega Man fan games. Fan made gaming content generally has problems when it comes to difficulty balancing anyway, but these games have earned a certain reputation for their difficulty, which creates a problem when you have content made by fans, for fans. This insularity means these things are usually way too hard for what I would consider “normal” people (read: casual fans and outsiders). Add on to the fact that I’d even say that there are official Mega Man games with bad difficulty balancing, and you have a recipe for frustration. Sadly, this is how I’d characterize Perfect Blue: though this introductory level isn’t impossibly hard, it’s definitely pushing that edge where it’s not very accommodating to someone who hasn’t played and finished every Classic Mega Man game ever made. It almost immediately throws you into scenarios where you have jumps you can barely reach, insta-kill spikes, and enemies that not only actively dodge your shots, but invincible enemies that launch counter attack homing missiles. And then it starts making you juggle all of this stuff, together, at the same time. None of this is insurmountable as long as you’re paying attention, but as a very casual Mega Man fan, it’s an unfriendly first impression and makes me worried about what the rest of the game is going to be like as the challenge naturally ramps up. For those hardcore Mega Man fans among you, the rest of this is solid, at least. The presentation and controls are excellent, and the new sprites are beautiful. It’s a game I’d love to enjoy when it’s done… but I’m assuming I’ll be left out in the cold. A shame, really, because there’s so much promise here.

Sonic and the Mayhem Master

There’s a lot to like about this game, but there’s a part of me that really wonders if this should even be considered a Sonic fan game. Mayhem Master’s depictions of Sonic and Amy Rose are atypical to put it mildly. Here, Sonic seems to be a bookish nerd of sorts, a sidekick to Amy Rose, who has been turned into a burnt out, cigar-smoking detective. Most of the game plays out as half an adventure game, half an RPG, where you roam around the world talking to NPCs and gather clues while being assaulted by random battles. The battle system is super off-the-wall, too, perhaps taking inspirations from games like Mario & Luigi and Undertale. This means that battles aren’t passive -- you spend most of each fight dodging or nullifying incoming attacks with simplistic action-based commands. It’s weird, and different, and occasionally even a little bit overwhelming. That’s kind of the whole game, really. It’s the sort of thing that really doesn’t feel like a Sonic game at all, but it also doesn’t feel bad. The artwork is very charming, I’m interested in seeing the characters develop, and there’s plenty of worldbuilding and mystery. Would this still be as intriguing if you removed the Sonic connection, even if it’s so threadbare? That’s a hard question to answer. I know that some of my interest in this game is seeing how it spins more familiar Sonic elements into something that’s completely different. Worth checking out, for curiosity’s sake if nothing else.

Sonic and the Dreamcatcher

This is a fairly brilliant little game with two unfortunate quirks. If you didn’t know, the special stages in the original Sonic the Hedgehog were inspired by an arcade game of the era called Cameltry, published by Taito in 1989. Now, Sonic’s special stages were different enough from Cameltry that it wasn’t a case of Sega outright stealing the gameplay, but there’s a clear lineage there, and it only becomes clearer when you compare the special stages in Sonic 4 Episode 1 to Cameltry (spoilers: in that game, they’re nearly identical). Dreamcatcher is also from this lineage, but is infinitely more charming than either Sonic 4 and maybe even Cameltry itself. The idea is that you must collect a specific number of blue spheres in order to reveal the Chaos Emerald, after which you have a limited amount of time to find and collect it. It’s very simple, but the presentation really sells the game’s charm. It’s just a game that looks good and sounds good, with an interesting premise executed very well. Also, you get a dedicated “& Knuckles” button to spawn infinite Knuckles to help you collect blue spheres and bash enemies. Being able to have unlimited numbers of these guys sounds like it would break the game, but once that countdown clock begins, the last thing you need is 20+ echidnas clogging up the route back to the emerald. The first quirk this game suffers from is that there’s only two levels. Parts of this have a very “game jam made in a weekend” vibe to it despite the rock-solid music, sound, and gameplay, and only having two levels contributes to that. Hopefully more are coming in the future. The other quirk? You can’t actually download this game -- it’s embedded in a webpage. I’m sure this is to make it easy to play on any platform with a web browser (phones, PCs, etc.) but I find myself greatly desiring a hard copy of this game that can live on my computer forever.

Sonic Galactic

Now here’s just a good old fashioned Sonic fan game. Though it clearly takes inspiration from Sonic Mania’s aesthetics in some places, it’s clearly doing its own thing, featuring not just the core cast of Sonic, Tails, and Knuckles, but also Fang the Sniper, and even a brand new character named Tunnel the Mole. Unlike a lot of Sonic fan games at SAGE, this appears to be using something besides Clickteam Fusion, Game Maker, or Unity. Here, it’s the “Hatch Game Engine,” whatever that is. Whatever the case may be, the game runs very well and is basically indistinguishable from just playing Sonic Mania. Visuals are sharp, music’s good, the two included boss fights are surprisingly fun to fight -- everything seems to be in order. As a result, there’s not really a lot to say. This is just a good, fun game. Anything else I’d say would come off sounding like nitpicks. For example, there’s no way to set graphics options yet, so the game is stuck in 2x Windowed mode. Fang and Tunnel are cute additions, but I wonder how much utility they have as characters. Unless I missed something, Fang’s pop gun is mainly for a weak double-jump ability, and Tunnel’s ability to dig and ricochet off floors, walls and ceilings is cool, but it doesn’t have quite the universal utility of Tails’ flight or Knuckles climbing and gliding. It’ll be interesting to see how or maybe even if their abilities have a chance to grow into something special. Anyway, like I said, those are nitpicks, so try to give this a shot if you can.

Sonic Robo-Blast!

Remasters seem to be a bit of a theme this SAGE, between Sonic Triple Trouble 16-bit, Sonic 2 SMS, Sonic 1 Revisited, but this is perhaps the most surprising of them all: a loving remaster of the original Sonic Robo-Blast. SRB1 was perhaps one of the first true “landmark” fan games, given that it was basically a whole entire game that people could play. It's not a stretch to say that SRB1 probably helped kickstart the fan gaming community that still survives to this day -- I certainly owe my involvement in the community to seeing SRB1 for the first time. The problem is, as historically significant as the game might be, it’s nearly impossible to go back to nowadays -- it’s much, much too dated to be any fun. This remaster completely re-envisions SRB1 as a regular Sonic game, while also pulling in gameplay elements from Sonic Robo-Blast 2. It’s a bit of a time paradox mindwarp, but it helps give it a bit more personality than just making a bog-standard 2D Sonic. It works, aided by the fact the sprites, music and overall presentation are fantastic. The only downside is the Act 2 boss, which commits the cardinal sin of taking away player agency and making you wait around far too much. Here’s hoping this gets finished, because it’s definitely on my radar now.

Super Mario Flashback

This has been floating around for a few years now and I’m glad to see it’s finally starting to get some more substantial content as it moves towards becoming an actual game. That being said, this is also one of those games that’s kind of hard to talk about because it’s just… really polished. The art is incredible, it controls exactly like a Mario game, and there’s already a decent mixture of ideas at play in the demo. Anything else I’d say would sound like nitpicking -- like, for example, the backseat game designer in me wonders if maybe the game is prioritizing aesthetics a little too much. This is a wonderfully animated game, absolutely gorgeous, but some actions, like the butt-stomp and the wall kick, feel a bit sluggish, and I think it’s because they show off fancy animations. Even if it’s a split second, waiting for Mario to attach to a wall to kick off of it feels slow. Really, though, that’s an insignificant complaint. This demo is still well worth checking out.

Sonic Advance 4 Advanced

This game seems like a greatest-hits of Dimps best ideas, spanning the first Sonic Advance all the way to Sonic Rush. There’s just one problem: the game seems broken. Now, my desktop PC is starting to show its age. I built it four and a half years ago, and though it can handle game like Gears of War 5 on high settings at 60fps, slowly, newer games seem to be leaving it behind. That being said, I don’t think a game like Sonic Advance 4 here should be running at what appears to be half its intended speed. It also originally launched in a teeny-tiny window (we’re talking, like, smaller than a postage stamp) and even though the options menu has a toggle for full screen mode, it doesn’t want to work. Something about this game under the hood seems to be struggling very, very, VERY hard. It’s a shame, because if this actually played at the proper speed, it seems like it might actually be an alright game, if a bit complex and busy.

Sonic 2 SMS Remake

Here’s a game I was all buckled in expecting to enjoy. Like it says on the tin, this is a remake of Sonic 2 for the Master System (and Game Gear), but with wide screen visuals and huge expansions to the mechanics, roster of playable characters, and levels. On the outside it seems really impressive, and to a certain degree it is, but something about the controls feel a little off. Sonic’s heavier here than he is on the Master System, perhaps to simulate “real” Sonic physics a little more accurately, but you can also pretty much stop on a dime, and the combination of the two feels awkward. The camera also needs a lot of work, as it’s basic at best and does a poor job of letting you see what’s below (to the dev if you’re reading this: there’s actually video tutorials out there on how 2D scrolling cameras work, it might be worth looking a couple of them up). It also leans into some of the tech limitations of the Master System, like how you aren’t given any rings for boss fights (and even hiding the HUD, a move done to save on resources for the large enemy sprites). I could be picky on a bunch of other little stuff, too, like how the flight mechanics feel, but there are other games to play at SAGE and I’ve got at least two more articles to write. Needless to say, this is a solid (impressive, even) foundation but it’s missing a lot of late-stage polish to clean up the tiny little rough edges.

Rayman Redemption

I tell this story every so often, but it was about three quarters of the way through Rayman 2 on the Sega Dreamcast when it struck me, suddenly: I love this game. I was being chased by a pirate ship through some rickety bridges and even though I was dying over and over and over again, I realized I had been enjoying Rayman 2 enough that I might put it in my top ten Dreamcast games. But that was 2002, and the years haven’t been so kind to ol’ Rayman. From the strangely celebrity-infused Rayman 3, to the tragedy of Rayman 4 (eventually becoming Raving Rabbids) to the endless, careless ports of Rayman 2 to every platform under the sun, one gets the impression Ubisoft maybe didn’t know what to do with Rayman. Especially now, when most of Ubisoft’s games are some form of online live service or cookie cutter open world experience (or increasingly both). But the fans know what they want. Rayman Redemption takes the original 1995 Rayman game and lovingly gives it a fresh coat of paint. The results are akin to what Taxman and Stealth did for Sonic CD in 2011, with wide screen visuals, improved controls, touched up level design, but gameplay that still feels faithful and accurate to the original experience. Except that Sega charged money for that, and here, fans have released this for free. Ubisoft’s loss, I guess. I didn’t play Rayman 1 until well after I’d finished Rayman 2, and I’ll admit, I kind of bounced off of it back then. It felt slow, and awkward, and when the difficulty ramped up, it got very hard, very quickly. Now, admittedly, I’ve only put about 30 minutes into Redemption here, but just the addition of a run button is incredibly welcome, and the retooled level design and powerup mechanics helps the game feel way less obtuse overall. It’s just a cleaner, tighter, more accessible and more polished version of Rayman.

Stay tuned for the next article: Indie games.

[stillness-in-green]

The Weight of a Name

Some meta on Shigaraki, Kotaro, All For One, and the Japanese adoption system.  

So, I was thinking the other day about Shigaraki, family names, and the illustration of power that is All For One wresting Shigaraki from the Shimura family into his own.  To wit: I had occasionally wondered about Kotaro's resentment of his mother; about whether his adoptive parents, whoever they were, were cruel or distant with him, or whether he was so deeply wounded by his perceived abandonment that no arrangement would have been happy or supportive enough to lessen his trauma.  Also, why in heaven's name wasn't his name changed?  If Nana was concerned that All For One might hurt him to get at her, why wasn't the simplest and most basic aspect of his identity, his family name, altered?  Upon further reflection, though, I remembered some of what I've read about family law in Japan and came to a realization: I don't think Kotaro was adopted.  This has significant implications for both his own upbringing and the statement All For One makes in “adopting” Tenko.  

While adoption numbers look high in Japan--the second-highest in the world--in reality, over 90% of adoptions in the country are adult adoptions of men in their 20s-30s, usually for the purposes of inheriting businesses.  Foster care is rare now and was once even rarer; the majority of children in the care of Japanese child services grow up in overcrowded, understaffed institutions, and scant few of these children are even eligible to be adopted due to family law stating that putting a child in an orphanage does not equate to surrendering one's parental rights.  Often, children are placed in orphanages due to the parents' financial difficulty or history with abuse, with the possibility that they might come back for those children when they get their lives back on track--though in reality, this is quite rare.  

Why are these ties kept so strong?  Well, it goes back to family ties and bloodlines, and the ways in which modern Japanese society is built around those things on some very, very bedrock levels.  In the West, we have individual documents for our major life events, but in Japan, since the 1870s, there has been the koseki.  

The koseki is a family registry--one is entered into one's parents' registry at birth, with all information about the family's births, deaths, marriages, divorces and adoptions being kept in the same place.  The registry for a given family is maintained for two generations, with children typically only beginning their own family registries when and if they marry--sometimes not even bothering until they have a child!  The koseki--theirs and each of their parents'--will also have references to one another, allowing a diligent person to track a family line and its major events back for generations by simply following the paperwork.  Being recorded in a koseki is the primary indicator of Japanese citizenship.  "Family" as recorded in the koseki governs inheritance rights, and in turn carries expectations about children looking after their parents in the latter's old age.  While in recent years, limits have been placed on who can access koseki, as recently as 2008, anyone who was even curious about someone else's koseki could walk into the relevant government office and ask to see it for only a basic fee.  This contributes to enormous privacy concerns and societal pressure to not do anything that would "sully" the family koseki, as doing so could not impact just peoples' views of you, but of everyone else in your family.  (cite)

The whole schema for the koseki assumes a heterosexual, nuclear family dynamic, with a predictable difficulty in forcing that framework fit outlying cases--single parents, international or same-gender marriages, divorce, surrogacy arrangements, gender changes, and--most relevant to this discussion--adoption.  Because of the perceived sanctity of the koseki, adoption of children for purposes other than inheritance remains vanishingly rare--combine that with the rarity of parents who give up their children ever returning for them, and what you have are too many children in too few facilities, a recipe for misery.  Children in Japanese orphanages are often considered--by both people in society at large and even the children themselves--as "unwanted."  Studies about children who grew up in such institutions suggest they lag behind the rest of their age group in development and in school, that they have little experience in forming long-term bonds with others; "many struggle with basic interpersonal skills like empathy and regulating their emotional state."  Adults who come out of such institutions often fail to finish school or seek higher education and wind up working low-paying jobs or relying on government assistance. (cite, but also see: Bubaigawara Jin)  

While Kotaro--if he was raised in an orphanage--clearly overcame the odds very admirably regarding his schooling and employment, he equally clearly came out of the experience still nursing emotional scars and ill-equipped to deal with children of his own.  This glacial societal resistance to mucking with family records probably also explains why his name was never changed--if he was never adopted by another family, there would be no other koseki to register him to, and Japan doesn't have a witness protection program.  

What all of this illustrates to me--along with shedding some light on what Kotaro's childhood post-Nana was probably like--is what exactly is being communicated by All For One's adoption and subsequent renaming of Shimura Tenko.  Kotaro was leashed to the Shimura name all his life, even after his mother gave him up, even after she died.  He could never escape his status as "an unwanted child"; anyone who wanted to look him up could do so (including, very possibly, All For One himself, depending on how much of Shigaraki's backstory you think was orchestrated from the beginning).  

By contrast, Tenko is severed cleanly from the Shimura family name, given another name not listed on any koseki (at least not one updated within the last two hundred years).  He's cut out of the Shimura family entirely, adopted at a young age by a man who wants him, a man with such utter disregard for societal systems and values that he's able to just take the child he wants, difficulties with adoptions and names and family registers be damned.  In a stroke, at his whim, the unyielding weight of Shimura is nullified, and instead, Tenko becomes Shigaraki Tomura, a child who doesn't exist anywhere.  Not recorded on a koseki, he is thus without family or nationality, his Quirk unrecorded, his date of birth unknown.  There is nowhere any proof of his existence.  All told, it's a pretty profound statement about the lengths All For One is willing (and happy) to go to in stamping out all traces of the One For All bearers' legacies.

(...And yet, perversely, Shigaraki also kind of fits the model for Japanese adoption--All For One explicitly intends him to be a successor, after all.  In that light, you could say that he was adopted into the Shigaraki family to inherit the family business.  I have to imagine that All For One thought this was pretty funny, though probably no one else agrees with him.)  

A note: The stats and info I reference above are relevant to modern-day Japan and, of course, My Hero Academia isn't set in modern-day Japan, not quite.  It's set in Japan 200-300-odd years in the future, with the caveat that the development of super-powers and the resulting massive social upheaval stunted societal and technological growth  such that the setting still looks mostly like modern-day Japan, only with super-powers.  That being the case, do we assume that the ongoing updates to the koseki system had already been made as of the emergence of Quirks, enduring through the plot as we know it, or do we assume that changes to the system were made on a roughly even time-scale as in modern times--e.g. did employers stop being able to ask for a copy of one's koseki in 1974 or merely "forty-five years ago"?  

Given the chaos that was wrought by the appearance of Quirks, the alleged lawless periods, as well as the existence of a mandatory Quirk registry and the phenomenon of "Quirk marriages," I am disinclined to believe that the problems represented by the koseki have been addressed much at all since early-2000s Japan.  If anything, the conservative influences in the Japanese government that are so resistant to legislating changes to how the koseki functions today would probably have even more reason to push back against those changes if faced with Sudden Super-Powers.  My Hero Academia is intended to speak to a modern Japanese audience--the issues facing its villains, in particular, are reflective of real problems people face in Japan--and thus, to me at least, it's counterintuitive not to interpret the series' characters with that modern Japanese context in mind.  Who is Horikoshi writing for, and what in his society is he trying to comment on?  With that lens in place, I think the koseki is exactly as much a problem in MHA's world as it is our own--possibly even moreso.

[revlyncox]

Stone Soup 2020

This reflection was written for the Washington Ethical Society by Lyn Cox, November 22, 2020.

In the story of Stone Soup, we learn we are more powerful and resilient together than we are alone, and that however small we think our gifts are, they are a beautiful and necessary ingredient in the larger whole. Liz James makes a good point that we often miss opportunities because we haven’t noticed the beauty of our own gifts. It is also true that sometimes we hold back out of a feeling of scarcity, or because we’re not sure what else will be asked of us once we open up. We can tell by how many different versions of this folk tale are in existence that the legend of Stone Soup is rich with meaning. Just like a soup with many ingredients, a tale with many tellers has subtle notes and surprising flavors that we can keep discovering year after year. Today, I’d like to talk about appreciation and abundance.

Felix Adler knew that recognizing human worth is part of the project of moral uplift. He said, "May the humanity that is within every human being be held precious. The vice that underlies all vices is that we are held cheap by others, and far worse, that in our innermost soul we think cheaply of ourselves."

Adler exhorts us to appreciate each other and ourselves.

The Washington Ethical Society Community Relations Pact includes a commitment to “express gratitude readily and accept appreciation graciously.” You already know that appreciating one another and the staff is an act that lifts everyone up, and helps us to bring out the best in each other by reinforcing what is joyful, beautiful, and supportive of our shared mission. In a community as large as WES, especially when we’re mainly a virtual community, it can be hard to figure out how to participate, how to be part of the interactions and responses that help shape this poetry in motion. Positive feedback is an extremely effective way to do that. Appreciation increases energy and resilience. You know that. You voted on it.

What might be less obvious is the part about accepting appreciation graciously. When someone offers positive feedback, or even a simple greeting, take a moment and allow yourself to be known. We can’t always see each other face to face, even when we’re on video it’s tricky to figure out eye contact. An email, a chat message, an emoji, these small acts of kindness are worth noticing and celebrating. And when messages go out to the whole community, it may not feel personal, but the appreciation expressed for your dedication, your care, your simply being -- those sentiments are sincere. Thank you for being part of WES. Yes, I mean you.

Even less obvious is appreciating yourself. Please know that you are a precious creature of worth. Even before we get into what different people bring to this community or the world, you don’t have to earn your designation as a human being. I think it is easier to be part of something larger than ourselves when we start with the knowledge that we reach out from a place of inherent worth.

We’ve just been through Transgender Day of Remembrance, and I am reminded all over again that there are beloveds who don’t know that they are valued, who are shown by state-sanctioned violence and discrimination that they don’t matter, and the results are deadly. We have to do better at protecting our most marginalized beloveds, particularly Trans women of color, and we have to do better at building a world where every person knows that they are beautiful, valued, and loved. Here, we do our best to create a community where every person can be their whole selves, with all of who they are in terms of culture, race, gender, family shape, language, and ability.

People do not have to “contribute” to have inherent worth, and it’s still lovely to notice when people do offer gifts to the community. It is not mutually exclusive to appreciate people for simply being and to appreciate the time, talent, creativity, and resources that someone has intentionally made available to benefit others. In some retellings of Stone Soup, people bring things to the table that are unusual, things their neighbors would not have thought to add to soup. Maybe it’s some tart fruit that ends up adding tantalizing acidity to the soup, or something briny like capers that gives a surprise spark of salt, or some chickpeas to add body to the broth. Sometimes, but not often, Stone Soup retellings take place in a community where different families have different food traditions, and the resulting fusion creates a soup that is an entirely new culinary snapshot of that community in that place and time. Each person’s presence makes a difference.

Appreciation of others requires a certain amount of humility, recognizing that none of us can do and be all of the things that our communities need at the same time. We are each of us always learning, there are things we have not experienced and do not know. Humility does not necessarily mean self-deprecation. We can know that we are people of worth, and that the things we are in the process of learning are valuable talents to offer, while still admiring and appreciating others. You being your whole self, making mistakes so that you can keep learning to draw out your best talents, combines with your neighbor being their whole selves and being allowed to learn and grow in their talents, until we have a learning and growing community where works-in-progress are appreciated and encouraged.

Felix Adler spoke about how ethics is a cooperative endeavor, that we need each other in our uniqueness. He said, "People may be said to resemble not the bricks of which a house is built, but the pieces of a picture puzzle, each differing in shape, but matching the rest, and thus bringing out the picture."

Let’s go on appreciating the unique shapes of our neighbors, and the bit of the puzzle that we each bring, remembering that this puzzle is a living thing with constantly shifting pictures and shapes. Let’s find ways to affirm the shapes and pictures and flavors that are present in each fleeting moment.

Another value that Stone Soup reminds us of is abundance. In a scarcity mentality, we anticipate dividing up the resources that are apparently before us, with the expectation that it will not be enough. In an abundance mentality, we imagine what could be, and open our minds to the possibility that there may be resources we have not yet noticed. In an abundance framework, we use our time and our resources creatively, we find new applications for items and knowledge available among us, we remember what we are here to do.

Something I wonder about the village in the Stone Soup story is about their purpose for being a village. Why are their homes gathered together? Is it for convenience? Safety in numbers? Is it because political forces have pushed them together? Have they gathered to share a resource like fresh water or good soil? Are they in that area as stewards, caring for a sacred place? It is possible that part of the reason the villagers have stopped valuing their gifts and channeling them together is because they don’t know what their shared purpose might be.

The Stone Soup experience suggests that, whatever brought them together originally, the villagers might find new purpose as a result of this shift in perspective. Having a “why” can unleash energy, creativity, and unity. As the soup begins to cook, the villagers find a temporary purpose in curiosity. This is enough of a goal to help them to see their individual carrots and solitary noodles with new eyes. It is enough of a purpose to inspire action.

Abundance, coupled with purpose, helps us to overcome feelings of helplessness or despair. The people of the village didn’t seem happy at the beginning, or very active. Maybe hunger had made it more difficult to think, or maybe fear of scarcity was driving them apart. Coming together for a common goal reminds us that, even when we are individually limited, collectively we have power.

As we retell Stone Soup in these socially distant times, it is natural to long for the days when we can again safely gather in person. In a moment, we’ll see a video montage that includes photos of past celebrations. It’s OK to be happy about the memories and also sad that we can’t celebrate the same way today. But let’s also appreciate the gifts we have now, and those we have discovered as we have been forced to come up with new solutions. WES is more accessible than ever to those who live at a distance, or who have trouble with mobility. There are people who have never before been able to be part of a vibrant, humanistic congregation, and who now are just as much a part of the Platform experience as someone who lives in Shepherd Park. Let’s not lose our renewed purpose of inclusivity as we re-imagine a post-COVID future.

Given the challenges of planning a virtual Stone Soup, I wonder if one of the reasons the villagers fell into scarcity is because the world changed around them, and they weren’t sure how to adapt. They would have needed a new source of motivation when they couldn’t keep doing things the way they had always been done. They would have needed a new way to apply the talents they had developed under an old paradigm. They would have needed a way to encourage each other to try new things for this new world, to learn and grow imperfectly, with appreciation and acceptance.

Our experience of the last eight months tells us that none of that is easy. I know many of us are tired. Some of us have had economic and health challenges that need not have affected us as deeply in a society with a stronger safety net. Learning how to navigate a new world, even a temporary world when we don’t know how long it will last, is exhausting.

Yet here you are, seeking ways to practice abundance. You sent pictures of food and stones. You sent recipes, over 30 last I heard, which will be emailed to members in a PDF recipe book later today. Some of our Middle School families offered their talent for the story. Maybe there are days when you can’t focus on creating something, but you can begin with appreciating someone; that makes room for abundance, too. This community, collectively, has resources and skills and curiosity and creativity that can carry you into the future. There is abundance here, ready to be coupled with purpose.

The Washington Ethical Society is a precious and valuable community, comprised of beloved people. You are worthy just as you are. If you have gifts you want to share, skills you want to develop, a heart for caring, WES and the world will be made better by your generosity of spirit. We make room by appreciating each other as well as honoring our own gifts. We make way for the future with abundance and purpose. May it be so.

[themovieblogonline]

Neve Campbell Returns: Scream VII Revives Sidney Prescott's Legacy

Hold on to your popcorn, horror fans! The Scream franchise is gearing up for its seventh chapter, and it’s more thrilling than a midnight phone call from Ghostface himself. Neve Campbell is stepping back into her iconic role as Sidney Prescott, and the excitement is palpable. Here’s everything you need to know about why "Scream VII" might just be the slasher film we’ve all been waiting for. Neve Campbell Scream: A Frighteningly Familiar Face Neve Campbell, the queen of screams, is returning to the franchise that made her famous. The actress, who’s been absent since "Scream VI," is coming back for "Scream VII," and this time, it’s all about Sidney Prescott. Campbell’s return isn’t just a nostalgic move; it’s a strategic one. She’s stated that the new film’s focus on Sidney was a major factor in her decision to come back. "They did pitch the concept to me, and it’s the reason that I jumped on board," Campbell told Entertainment Tonight. So, why is this such a big deal? Sidney Prescott is the heart and soul of the Scream franchise. Her survival through six films proves she’s tougher than a two-dollar steak. With Ghostface still lurking in the shadows, it’s clear that the slasher saga is going back to its roots, focusing on the character who has seen it all. The Return of Kevin Williamson If you’re wondering who’s behind the madness this time, look no further than Kevin Williamson. The man who penned the original "Scream" and its sequel, "Scream 2," is back to direct. Williamson’s involvement is like adding a touch of classic seasoning to a beloved dish. His return suggests that "Scream VII" will stay true to the franchise’s winning formula of suspense, humor, and self-aware horror. Williamson’s script for "Scream 4" was a hit, and with him back at the helm, fans can expect a blend of nostalgia and fresh thrills. This isn’t just any reboot; it’s a revival with the original recipe. Behind the Scenes Drama It wouldn’t be a Scream movie without a bit of drama, right? Neve Campbell’s departure from "Scream VI" was due to a perceived undervaluation of her role, but it seems that the franchise has made amends. In 2022, Campbell expressed her frustration, saying she didn’t feel her contributions were properly recognized. However, Williamson’s recent support for her return indicates a shift in how the franchise values its stars. Things took a turn for the bizarre when Melissa Barrera, the new lead star, was fired over controversial social media posts. Jenna Ortega also dropped out, leaving the franchise in a bit of a pickle. But, as they say, when one door closes, another opens. Campbell’s return is a refreshing change, and it shows that the franchise is ready to pivot and adapt. What To Expect from Scream VII "Scream VII" promises to be a rollercoaster of suspense and scares. With Campbell back as Sidney Prescott, we can expect a blend of classic Scream thrills and new twists. The franchise is evolving, and Campbell’s involvement suggests that this new chapter will be both a tribute to the past and a bold step into the future. As the franchise kicks off this new era, fans can look forward to more Ghostface antics and a deeper dive into Sidney’s character. Whether you’re a longtime fan or a newcomer, "Scream VII" is set to deliver the chills and thrills that made the series a horror staple. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3iKWeRPDsaE (Source: Deadline) Read the full article

[veroniicaflores]

task 001: character introduction.

(admin tangerine, 21, est) ☼ who’s that hottie, standing outside the love hotel? it’s VERONICA FLORES, a BISEXUAL CIS FEMALE, who looks a lot like NATHALIE KELLEY! NIKKI’s insta bio says SHE is a STYLIST and is looking for a fun time this summer. SHE is into DADDY KINK & GROUP SEX, but not into SCAT & BLOOD PLAY. by the way, SHE reminds me of ORANGE POPSICLES & COLORFUL SUNSETS.

quick infos:

full name: veronica eleanor rosemary flores (i swear i have never watched dynasty EVER and i was told this is the last name of nat’s character.... too late)

dob: august 23rd 1988 (she’ll turn 31 this year)

pob: las vegas, nevada.

kinks: daddy***/mommy kink, mild roughness,  group sex, public sex, receiving oral (eat her out good and she’ll marry you... too soon) although she enjoys giving oral to girls and/or strap-ons/dildos, mutual masturbation, nipple play, hair pulling squirting, spanking, consensual somnophilia.

anti kinks: blood play, wax play, electric stimulation, bondage, very rough sex, scat, foot play, humiliation & extreme anal (fingering and butt plugs are fine, but there will be very rare anal sex).

3 favorite things: dancing naked at 2am to some electronic music or old rock songs, italian gelato (she’d give you a handjob for a raspberry gelato) & puppies videos on instagram.

3 things she hates: spiders or bugs of any sorts (excluding spider man or ant man or black widow wink wink), people who lack of respect & compassion, bad hair days.

+2 positive traits: easygoing & compassionate

-2 negative traits: gullible & jealous

wanted connections:

ex-husband: idk where i’m going with this, but i have a feeling this would be so interesting if he’d come back to the hotel and they’d reconnect after a few years of being apart and not speaking. bonus points for high sexual tension and cute stuff! 

daddy and/or mommy: just that “caring, loving but also can please all your needs” vibe. spoiler alert, she won’t be the mommy, she’s too much of a sub for that.

femme fatale: just a woman, preferably younger whom nikki just can’t resist. someone with dominant tendencies. or someone around her age too! 

friends with benefits: GIRLS GIRLS GIRLS GIRLS GIRLS 

sexual tension: it says it all. 

headcanons

childhood + teenage years + early twenties:

only child of a loving family of restaurant owners, veronica inherited the best conditions to become a traditional girl from a just as typical and traditional family. she was loved by her parents, she loved them. she learned to cook at a very young age and had a noticeable talent. she was the preppy girl from the picture perfect family. she had a dog, alfredo, that she rescued from the streets and who became her only friend for most of her childhood.

in high school, she bonded with a pair of twin siblings who came from a completely different background. from what she knew, their parents were big gamblers and lost most of their savings in casino nights. these people had that edge and gave that down to earth vibe nikki admired yet could not completely comprehend. they were a dynamic trio that balanced one another perfectly. jack (npc) was a total artist who encouraged nikki to express herself, valerie (npc) was very analytical and had a talent at reading through nikki while nikki herself was that sweet figure who was easy to please and could easily please everyone.

when they graduated, valerie confessed she had no idea what she would be doing with her future with no money at all. they were sitting in nikki’s family restaurant and drinking beer in cask with nostalgia and a part of sadness. jack had big plans, he found an apartment in san francisco and wanted to become a graphic designer. nikki, however, was torn between taking over the family business or making a living of her own. that was when valerie drunkenly suggested to work at one of the newly opened strip clubs nearby their neighborhood.

so she did.

she turned 18 when she realized she had lost so many years to living in a mold she no longer fit in. she was more than just preppy church outfits and cooking sundays with her mother, she was more than a daddy’s girl who washed tables when the restaurant was closed. what did adults always say? a good education promised a good future, so, veronica applied to the college of southern nevada for a degree in communications with a minor in women’s studies. she had no idea where she was heading, but it was a start.

her parents contributed by driving from class to home every day, they paid her more adult looking clothing and they finally gave her the freedom she never knew she needed until she reached majority.

although jack disappeared from her life, valerie remained very present. they did as they agreed and found a job at a high end strip club in vegas. they made good money instantly without having to do nasty stuff nikki had never been introduced to. within a few months, they saved enough to get matching tattoos, new jewelry and pay for valerie’s apartment. the club provided a living area a few blocks away, but valerie felt better living on her own. nikki tried to mingle and fit in with the other girls, but they were too different. maybe it was the education, maybe it was the background, but the trashy side of this job did not interest the italian girl more than that.

veronica worked as a stripper during college until she graduated with a degree that would soon become irrelevant and useless. with contribution from her parents who never even judged her for her job (it was true nikki did tell them it was just a dancing studio) and with her savings, veronica moved out of nevada and headed to california.

now

she worked in clothing stores, in malls and eventually in expensive boutiques. the other sellers and all the clients noticed she had a talent for matching outfits, accessories and every details making sure the person who wore them would be at their best. eventually, she started doing this as a side line. she promoted her skills on social media and got quite the hype. she worked for magazines and influencers. she became a private stylist as well. no rest for the wicked! 

along the way, she met the man who would become her husband. they really had a perfect marriage. being career driven and uncertain of being able to meet her parents’ expectations, she could not lie to herself. the marriage ended in a peaceful and respectful divorce. she is still convinced he is the love of her life. 

at 26, she started a youtube channel when she became a bit bored of her casual job. on her channel (youtube.com/user/floralpatternslover), she does a lot of hauls, diy accessories, storytimes, recipe tutorials and various challenges. she has 2 millions subscribers and just as many instagram followers. nikki lives off of that more nowadays. she tries to post at least once a week on youtube to keep the ad revenue coming. 

she makes a lot of money, but she really doesn’t act like it. she thrives on late night trips to 7/11 or on dollar store snacks and stuff. she gives a lot of money back to charity, and clothes back to other organizations as well. similar to chris klemens, 

headcanons

BIGGEST SUB AND BABY ENERGY YOU HAVE EVER MET. she’s just... so willing and vulnerable, it’s crazy. make sure your muse can handle that!

she will never take the lead, or, well, almost never. if she feels really needy, she might initiate things and suggest certain positions and actions, but otherwise, you choose and she obeys.

she works with clothes all the time, love clothes, sleeps on her bed covered with clothes because she’s too lazy to put them back in her walk-in closert... yet she would live naked 24/7 if she could. she goes from 0 to 100 real quick when it comes to exhibitionism!

she LOVES sex. passionate sex. sex for sex. group sex. watching sex. she’s really into it. it takes her mind off everything else. 

once again i repeat i have never watched dynasty and now i’m playing two fcs from the show TALK ABOUT A COINCIDENCE i’m sorry about the last name thing, i just thought it fit 

alsoooooo i was very attached to lea as a fc generally, but especially for nikki. it was hard choosing someone else :( i hope nathalie can fit!

[cindylouwho-2]

RECENT NEWS, RESOURCES & STUDIES, August 19, 2020

Welcome to my latest summary of recent ecommerce news, resources & studies including search, analytics, content marketing, social media & Etsy! This covers articles, podcasts, videos and infographics I came across since the late July report, although some may be older than that.

Please note I am taking the next week off, starting tomorrow (Aug. 19), so I might be a little slow in replying to any comments. 

TOP NEWS & ARTICLES 

USPS has become the focus of investigations due to reported mail slowdowns. Some small businesses who rely on USPS to deliver are suffering. “The longer the policy has been in effect, the worse the backlog gets.” As of today (August 18), the postmaster says they will rollback the changes until after the election in November. This is a rapidly-moving story in part due to the push for voting by mail, and should concern anyone who ships to US customers using regular mail (as opposed to couriers). Meanwhile, they plan to temporarily raise commercial rates during the holiday shopping season, but retail rates will not change. 

Ecommerce sales are still up year over year. "Before Covid-19 hit the US in March, e-commerce made up roughly 12% of retail sales in the country. That figure grew as states issued shelter-in-place orders that shut stores and kept shoppers at home, creating tailwinds for a company like Amazon. But even as states have begun to reopen, e-commerce has remained elevated, according to Bank of America data."..."The Economist used Google search traffic for hints of how lifestyles are changing and found users are still searching terms related to cooking, crafts, and exercise above pre-pandemic rates. There has been a noticeable spike in interest around such products as gardening supplies, baking flour, and Crocs." The UK is still seeing a good increase despite the ease in reduction in lockdown restrictions. The growth is slowing a bit in the US, though. 

Half of US small businesses fail in the first year (and other stats on small business). 

It’s been second quarter report season, covering company performance from April to June 2020.  Here are results for major companies involved in ecommerce in some way (comparisons are year-over-year):

Amazon US: sales up 40%

eBay: sales up 26%

Etsy: sales up $146% [click the link to read my summary]

Facebook: revenue up 11%

Google: revenue down 2%

PayPal: revenue up 22%

Pinterest: revenue up 4%; active users up 39%

Shopify: revenue up 97%

Walmart [2nd quarter ran May to July]: ecommerce sales up 97%, same-store sales up 9.3%

ETSY NEWS 

Admin are now posting a monthly update thread, in case you fear you have missed anything. This is how they chose to announce that non-seller accounts can no longer post in the forum. Since those account owners can still read the forum, that doesn’t mean you can call out your customers now. 

Sadly, there wasn’t much media coverage of Etsy’s nearly-annual billing screw up, but this one did get some attention. 

Etsy continues to get good media coverage for masks, including masks for your dolls. They also apparently got a decent slice of Google ranking for various pandemic-related searches in May [scroll down to the “Protection and Prevention” section]. 

However, Etsy is getting some bad press (along with Amazon), for allowing QAnon merchandise, because “the FBI has warned of the movement's potential to incite domestic terrorism.” Etsy replied to a request for comment saying that “that product listings associated with certain movements are allowed as long as they don't violate the company's seller or prohibited items policies, which ban items that promote hate or that could incite violence. The company said it is continually reviewing items on the site and could remove items in the future if they're found to violate Etsy's policies.”

More search trends on Etsy, this time kids’ items. I love how they think tie-dye was a ‘90s thing and not a ‘60-70s thing LOL. “a 318% increase in searches for kids tie-dye items...71% increase in searches for dinosaur wall art or decor*, and a 37% increase in searches for school of fish items….we’ve seen kid-friendly crafts spike in popularity, with searches for DIY kits for kids up 336%.”

Also, the holiday trends guide is out. “With the holidays approaching, and most shopping happening online, more shoppers will be looking for your help to make the season feel special.” The report is lengthy, covering Halloween to New Year’s, and most listing categories, while pointing out the possible pandemic changes to the usual trends. There is also an accompanying podcast with transcript. 

Speaking of the holiday season, here are Etsy’s tips for shops. Note that it is a bit late, as businesses need to have their holiday items posted no later than July if they want to be eligible for most fall media coverage. Almost every point refers to an Etsy tool or feature, some of them costing you money, so use this as a very broad guideline & be careful to read between the lines. 

They are still rolling out Etsy Payments to more countries: Morocco & Israel are the most recent. Note that Etsy Payments is not yet compulsory in these new countries. 

Etsy Ads once again has graphs. Do you find them useful? (I haven’t run ads at all this year, so I can’t check.)

Sendle is the latest shipping company to have a label integration with Etsy shops. 

Etsy asked US sellers to lobby their reps for more support for small business and other initiatives in the pandemic aid package.

SEO: GOOGLE & OTHER SEARCH ENGINES 

Google has stated that content on tabs is indexed and contributes to ranking as if it were on the page instead, but yet another test demonstrates that tabs may limit you. 

Due to the pandemic, Google has delayed finalizing mobile-first indexing until March 2021. (They originally announced it would be finished this September.) That means you have more time to update your website’s mobile version, ideally with responsive design. 

Site speed does matter to SEO, and Google is now asking some searchers how fast certain sites loaded for them. 

User comments on your products, blog posts and website can help you improve your SEO. The article suggests ways of getting that feedback, and ways to use it. [I’ve even had buyers give me new keywords to describe my items, in their messages and reviews.]

Getting links back to your site is important to SEO, but don’t annoy people while doing it. [sort of humour & sort of a rant, but does give some useful background on why backlinks matter.] Internal links also matter. 

There are some special tricks for food/recipe SEO, including structured data and even a WordPress plugin. 

Another WordPress plugin: submit any new or updated pages to Bing to be automatically re/indexed.

Do your keyword research before setting up your website’s sections and sub-sections, as they should serve the buyer experience, not your perception of it. Same with choosing which pages link to each other. 

SEOs are still trying to work out what happened with recent Google algorithm changes. Search Engine Journal claims that the May update was at least in part about demoting sites that had out-of-date or inaccurate information, so they suggest getting rid of the bad content on your site, or at least updating it. “Content pruning” has some advocates, but I wouldn’t worry about investing tons of time in this unless you have tons of time to spend. Just get rid of the blog posts that were wildly wrong, and the out-of-date filler. If you have a lot of sold out products, redirect those to relevant active pages. 

Meanwhile, a “glitch” on August 10 led people to think there was a massive Google algorithm update happening, but it all got fixed in less than a day. 

If you are behind on Google search news, here is a 7 minute video [with time stamped subtopics & resources links listed below], direct from Google. 

(CONTENT) MARKETING & SOCIAL MEDIA (includes blogging & emails) 

It’s tough to get started in social media if you don’t know the terminology, so here’s a list of the basic definitions you can consult if you get lost when reading.  

Don’t know how to blog? There are formulas you can use; here are eight options, nicely laid out, with downloadable templates. Don’t forget to figure out what your audience wants to read. And make sure you avoid these common blogging mistakes. 

If you have an email list but do not know how to take advantage of all the bells & whistles the companies (MailChimp, Constant Contact etc.) offer you, here are 4 ways to segment your lists. You can then send different offers or newsletters to different segments. 

You can optimize your social posts for people with visual impairments; excellent tips here. 

By the time you read this, the TikTok mess will likely have changed again, but here is an article on Trump’s order to prohibit US companies from doing business with TikTok owner ByteDance if the platform is not sold by September 15. 

Instagram has released its TikTok challenger, Reels, in more countries. 

Instagram is now offering a fundraising option, although it is a slow launch with some beta testing in the US, UK & Ireland to start. 

Here are step-by-step instructions on setting up your “Shop on Instagram.”

Pinterest says that searches around self-care & wellness have spiked during the pandemic lockdowns. “Pinterest has recently seen the highest searches ever around mental wellness ideas including meditation (+44%), gratitude (+60%) and positivity (+42%) that jumped from February to May….Pinterest says that searches for ‘starting a new business’ are up 35% on average, as are searches for ‘future life goals’ (2x), ‘life bucket list’ (+65%), ‘family goals future’ (+30%) and ‘future house goals’ (+78%).” There were also some searches clearly about spending more time at home: “Productive morning routine (up 6x), Exercise routine at home (up 12x), Self care night routine (up 7x)”

LinkedIn has a new algorithm; here’s how to make it work for you. [Many of these tips also apply to social media in general.]

Spotify is now doing “video podcasts”. Apparently a lot of their podcasters already did a video version of the Spotify podcasts, but had to publish it elsewhere up until now. 

Twitter now admits it is considering offering subscriptions to shore up its revenue numbers. “Shares of Twitter rose 4% in early trading Thursday following the earnings results....Twitter's growth plans are under close scrutiny as many advertisers pull back due to the pandemic. On Thursday, Twitter reported second-quarter ad revenues of $562 million, a 23% decrease compared to the same quarter a year ago. The company has also been hit by advertisers participating in an ad boycott of social media, linked to the nationwide racial justice protests.” Also, the recent hack is not helping them. 

That said, it is still possible to market using Twitter, and here are some of the basics. 

YouTube is no longer sending email updates when a channel you follow posts new content. 

ONLINE ADVERTISING (SEARCH ENGINES, SOCIAL MEDIA, & OTHERS) 

Ad spend has increased again as lockdowns end, in some cases beating last year by a decent margin. 

The Buy on Google program is ending its commission fees. Participants will also be able to integrate their PayPal and/or Shopify payment options. As often is the case, they are starting with the US first, but plan on rolling it out to more countries in the future. There are more details here, and a review here (with some of the drawbacks). 

Google Product Ads are now showing the item’s “material” on the listing card (before you click). If you are doing your own feed for your website, you may have the ability to add the attributes needed for the details to show up.  

If you find Google Ads too expensive, consider buying search ads on Bing. 

eBay is experimenting with showing ads mixed in with unpaid listings; placement would depend on the same algorithm. 

Here’s a new guide to Facebook Ads [videos & text]

STATS, DATA, OTHER TRACKING 

Bing has launched a new version of Webmaster Tools. 

There are ways to reduce the amount of traffic that Google Analytics designates as “direct traffic”; here are 15 of them. 

Currently in closed beta testing, the Google Search Console now has an “Insights” function, just like Google Analytics. I’ve found the GA one useful for telling me things I don’t always look at, so crossing my fingers that they release this to everyone soon. 

 ECOMMERCE NEWS, IDEAS, TRENDS 

Shopify helped many businesses stay open during pandemic lockdowns, giving it the boost to start competing with the likes of Amazon in ecommerce. “Shopify merchants that had previously or entirely relied on brick-and-mortar sales would later report they were able revive nearly 95% of that revenue online.”

eBay started rolling out its Managed Payments system to more sellers worldwide on July 20th. Things seem to be going slowly, with some confusion. 

But eBay is also having a 25th anniversary party for sellers on September 25th; don’t forget to register. 

Walmart is still delaying its new subscription model to challenge Amazon Prime, Walmart+. 

Amazon in the UK has launched a “Face mask store” part of the website. I haven’t seen this on other versions of Amazon. They’ve also increased some fees for some UK sellers, based on the new UK digital tax. And they are launching a site & presence in Sweden. 

The Competition Bureau of Canada has launched an investigation of Amazon’s treatment of third-party sellers. “The bureau is asking any person or business that has conducted sales via Amazon.ca to contact them if they have any insights into the issues it is investigating.“

Amazon Prime Day has been postponed to later dates this year, starting with India on August 6-7. The remaining countries will apparently be announced soon. 

If you use WooCommerce, here are a bunch of free plugins, with brief descriptions. 

BUSINESS & CONSUMER STUDIES, STATS & REPORTS; SOCIOLOGY & PSYCHOLOGY, CUSTOMER SERVICE 

Buyers do not all make purchase decisions the same way; Google uses its massive collection of data and some new studies to provide some examples. “Worldwide, search interest for “best” has far outpaced search interest for “cheap.”

It’s cheaper to keep repeat buyers than it is to find new ones; here are 16 ways to do that. One of my favourites is ““proactively providing information on how to avoid problems or get more out of your product” creates a 32% average lift to repurchase or recommend.”

It seems that researchers can never produce enough marketing guides on Gen Z and millennials. 

MISCELLANEOUS (including humour) 

I see a lot of new sellers, and some older sellers, confused about the idea of a business plan. HubSpot not only explains them, but also provides a downloadable template. 

If you are thinking of changing careers, or just want to add skills to better run your current business, Google has many different courses, some of which they offer for free. 

There are ways you can increase your productivity without (usually) working more hours. “A study published by John Pencavel of Standford University found that how much employees get done takes a sharp drop after 50 hours of work in a week, and even more drastically after 55 hours. The study found that employees working 70 hours per week actually produce nothing more in those extra 15 hours...taking a power nap in the middle of the day can help you process new information and even learn new skills.”

[blueboxesandtrafficcones]

The Nuptial Necessity - Chapter 7

A 12xRose Human AU

Despite an unglamorous job description, Rose loves the work she does with The Thistle Foundation, a charity founded by her best friend’s great-uncle.  It doesn’t hurt that her boss, her friend’s father, is easy on the eyes.  With a great job, wonderful friends and a loving family, life couldn’t be better – except for having someone to share it with.

All of that is threatened, though, when the great-uncle dies – and sets a strange condition for his nephew to inherit, jeopardizing the Foundation and Rose’s future, sparking a chain of events that might just get her everything she dreamed of and more.

Chapters will be posted on Saturdays and Tuesdays.  Many thanks to my beta, @stupidsatsuma

Rated: Explicit, for eventual smut

@doctorroseprompts

AO3  |  Masterlist

—

Sunday

Turning her car off, Rose leaned back against the headrest and closed her eyes, breathing deeply in preparation.  Things in the office had only grown more awkward and tense as they danced around each other, the uncomfortableness spilling over into her relationship with Clara, which only made her feel worse.

It’s a yes or no question, she reminded herself once again.  Just make a decision and stick to it – put all of us out of our misery, so the weirdness can stop and we can start making our plans.

The sound of another engine made her eyes open, and she climbed out as Malcolm pulled in next to her.  Locking her car she waited while he, Clara, and Danny emerged, mustering a wan smile for them all.  “Hey.”

“Hi.”  Malcolm nodded, grabbing a bottle from the backseat as Clara gave her a hug.

“Hey,” her bestie whispered in her ear, “how are you?”

Rose shrugged, holding her a little tighter.  “In knots,” she said honestly. “I still don’t know what to do.”

“There you are,” her father called, and they all turned to find him at the front door.  “C’mon in.”

They followed him through the house and out onto the patio, where everything was set up.  Tony was playing in the shallow end of the pool under their mother’s watchful eye from a nearby lounge chair, while the grill was ready to go off to the side.  Two long tables groaned under the food already out, with a few designated spaces for what Rose and the Tuckers had brought. Rose’s contribution was a bottle of white wine and a baked mac’n’cheese recipe Tony loved, while Malcolm had brought the whisky, Clara some cut up fruit, and Danny the brownies.

“Looks great, Mum,” Rose greeted Jackie, hugging her.

“Thanks, sweetheart.  Oi, Tony, out of the water!”  Releasing her eldest she turned to Clara, greeting her in much the same way.  “So nice to have all of you here, come, put your things down.”

“Thanks for having us, Mr. and Mrs. Tyler,” Danny said politely, making Pete chuckle and wave his hand.

“Very pleased to have you join us.  Really.  And it’s Pete and Jackie – I insist.”

As everyone greeted each other and began chatting, Rose smiled and watched.

This is my family.

-

Standing next to the grill on a warm, sunny day, holding a beer, was pretty much exactly Malcolm’s ideal way to spend an afternoon.  His daughter sat nearby, the occasional tinkle of her laughter music to his ears as she talked to Danny and Jackie, but in truth, nearly all of his attention was on Rose.

She’d changed into a swimsuit, a one-piece that was fairly modest for what it was, and was in the shallow end splashing with her brother.  It didn’t take his imagination much effort to picture her in the pool at the townhouse – in fact, it was too easy to see her with a toddler of their own, teaching their son (or daughter, he wasn’t picky) how to swim.

In fact, he didn’t just want it; he craved it, ached for it, sometimes dreamed of it so vividly he would wake reaching for her, expecting her next to him, confused and heartbroken when she wasn’t there until reality seeped back in.

Sometimes he didn’t want to wake up.

“Oi.”

A nudge startled Malcolm from his daydream, and he turned Pete, blinking in surprise.  “What?”

“D’you mind not ogling my daughter right in front of me while we’re trying to have a conversation?  When you’re not glaring at Danny for doing just the same, that is.”

His jaw dropped, trying to come with an answer.  “I wasn’t- that’s not- I-”

After a moment Pete laughed, waving a hand.  “Relax, I’m just messing with you,” his friend said easily.  “How are plans for the Gala going?”

Malcolm just blinked, trying to reboot his brain and cursing his overactive imagination.  It had been one thing, when his dreams were just that, but the intrusion into his waking life was bound to get him in trouble sooner or later.

And, strictly speaking, he hadn’t been ogling Rose.  Yes, okay, he might have been staring in her general direction, but he wasn’t picturing her naked – it’s early yet; how long is she going to stay in the pool? – though somehow he didn’t think Pete would appreciate what he was thinking any more than what he assumed.

Did he ask a question?

“The Gala’s going fine,” he finally answered, taking a long pull off his bottle and turning his back firmly on his assistant to focus on her father.  Her FATHER.  If Danny were looking at Clara the way I am Rose, I’d thump him – and he’s neither too old for her or a friend of mine, both of which I am.  Pull your shit together, Tucker.  “Rose is, of course, an incredible help.  No surprise she’s what makes the event what it is.”

“I would expect nothing less.”  Pete was still smirking, though, a look Malcolm didn’t appreciate.  “My daughter’s one of a kind.”

“That she is.”  Casting about for a change of subject, he asked, “Tony’s starting school this year, isn’t he?”

The other man didn’t seem fooled in the least, but went along with it.  “Reception.  Hard to believe.  Honestly, I’m not looking forward to his school years.  Well, the other parents, really. When Rosie was little we got looked down on for being so young, and I’m sure now we’ll be judged for being too old.  I don’t particularly care myself, but Jacks has been going on about it all summer and nothing’s even happened yet.”

“I know that feeling,” Malcolm agreed, smiling at the memory of Clara’s first day of school.  “It was the same for us – always judged and excluded for our ages.  Not that Missy or I particularly cared, but they tended to treat Clara as a pariah as well, and you can imagine how well I took that.  How do you judge a child for their parents’ decisions?  Unbelievable. Thankfully things were better once we moved to London, but still.  Judgemental pricks.”

They toasted, draining their bottles as one, and Malcolm didn’t hesitate to take the empties and exchange them for new, easily removing the lids.

“To tell the truth, I’m just glad to have the second chance,” Pete murmured, eyes flickering over to his wife to ensure she couldn’t hear.  “We’d long accepted she would be it when he came along, but I’m so glad he did.  I think I did well with Rose, but this time around I can really appreciate it, you know?  I was so focused when she was young on Vitex, on getting us out of the Estate that I missed things.”

Malcolm hummed but didn’t respond; they’d covered all of this before, and he knew his friend sometimes just felt the need to ‘speak it to the universe’, to quote Jackie.

“D’you think you’ll ever have another?”

Startled, Malcolm choked on his beer, going into a coughing fit that lasted long enough for Rose and Clara to shout in unison, “Stop it!”

“Your concern is overwhelming,” he wheezed, making his daughter roll her eyes and earning himself a rude gesture from Rose.  “I’m fine, thanks.”

When he straightened up Pete was waiting patiently with a napkin, arching an eyebrow when he took it.  “Not sure that qualifies as an answer.”

Wiping his mouth, Malcolm bought himself a few seconds to think before sighing.  “In theory, yes, I’d like another.  But practically… it just doesn’t seem to be in the cards.  And I don’t think Clara would take it with the grace that Rose did.”  He smiled wryly, remembering her reaction to the announcement – it had been at a Sunday dinner so similar to this one, and she had been so overwhelmed with joy that she was still bouncing off the walls the next day in the office, right up until they’d been mid-conversation and her face had contorted in horror.

“What’s wrong?”

Rose stared at him, gagging slightly.  “I just realized that if this baby was unplanned, my parents are having more sex than I am, and I’m the one in my mid-twenties.”

The memory made him chuckle, as had how she would periodically break out in full-body shivers every so often during the months of her mother’s pregnancy.  “She loved him from the first moment.”

“She did take it well,” Pete agreed, “and she’s such a help.  There’s nothing like a reliable, free childminder you can trust without hesitation.  She’ll be a spectacular Mum, when the time comes.”

Malcolm wholeheartedly agreed, but decided a neutral mhmm was the safer response, lest he let slip the secrets buried deep in his heart.  Things are weird enough right now, no need to make it worse.  Still, he couldn’t help but turn enough that he could watch Rose out of the corner of his eye.

A spectacular Mum indeed.

-

“So-”

Rose’s eyes fluttered closed as she fought back a groan at her mother’s would-be casual tone, not fooled for a moment.  Despite her best efforts she’d gotten caught alone with her in the kitchen, and it had been two agonizing minutes of idle chit chat as Jackie built up to her favorite topic of conversation, as if Rose didn’t know where it was headed.

The same place it always is, lately.

“Are you seeing anyone?”

There it is.

“Yes, only he’s an alien, see, and off travelling the universe and saving alien planets, which is why I never bring ‘im around.”  She rolled her eyes, turning around to face her mother, unsurprised at the death glare she was receiving.  “You know I’m not.  It’s just been too busy lately.”

“But, Rose, you’ve been saying that for years.  It was one thing when you were young, but you’re thirty now.  You’re running out of time.”

“Oh my God.”  Wanting to physically run from the conversation she settled for the mature thing of picking up a platter of food and heading for the door.  “I am not having this conversation with you.  Is it really so hard to accept that I’m happy with my life?”

Not one to let anyone else have the last word Jackie followed hot on her heels with the other tray.  “How could you be!  No husband, no children… and while it might seem like it at the moment, a vibrator and your brother are not satisfying substitutes!”

Rose stopped dead, staring in dismay at the four horrified faces looking back at her.  Though she was still a few steps from the table and her mother behind her, they’d all clearly heard her, the whole fucking country probably had, and her eyes darted between them all gauging their reactions.  Her father was disgusted, poor Danny uncomfortable and now staring at his hands, Clara’s eyes were very wide and her jaw open, and Malcolm… Malcolm looked ready to bust a gut laughing, leaning forward on the table, and despite both hands clasped over his mouth, was unable to hide the smile in his twinkling eyes, and when their eyes met, he winked.

Her eyes darted to the pool and for one wild moment she seriously considered throwing herself into it before slowly spinning around.  “Shut.  Up.”

-

Malcolm stuffed a forkful of lettuce in his mouth, glancing idly around the silent table as almost everyone else ate.  While Jackie sat very stiffly across from him glaring at her daughter and not moving, Rose was on his left and bouncing her leg like her life depended on it as she looked everywhere but at Jackie.

For the third time in as many minutes her knee bumped the table, jostling it, and on instinct Malcolm settled his hand on it to calm her.  It worked almost too well as she froze, and their eyes met for only a moment before his gaze skittered away.  He thought about moving it, but rather than being tense at his touch she let out a deep breath and almost seemed to relax, and just because he’d always wanted to and couldn’t help himself, he slowly rubbed his thumb against the side of her knee.  It was as soft as he’d always imagined, smooth, and she didn’t seem to mind given she hadn’t swatted his hand away.  Did she just sigh?

“You know, there’s a nice young man working for your father,” Jackie started abruptly, Rose’s aggravation returning as quickly it had dissipated, based on how her leg tensed beneath his hand.

For fuck’s sake, doesn’t she ever stop?

The answer was no, apparently, as she continued to chatter, oblivious to their audience or her daughter’s humiliation.  “He’s looking for a girl to marry.  Maybe I should invite him to lunch next week.  Or!  Mickey says he’s got a friend you’d get on well with, you should ask him about that.  I know you think you’ve got all the time in the world, but really, it would take a least a year to plan the wedding, and thirty-two sounds young but you might be surprised how long it takes you to get pregnant, and your body won’t bounce back as quickly as you’d like- we can’t all be like those celebrities, back to looking like sticks six weeks after giving birth.  You know, this might be an idea- start planning your wedding now, you should book two years out anyway- then just find your groom along the way!  You can’t afford to lose any time, and really, by now all the decent men are probably married, if not in committed relationships.  The longer you wait the more likely you are to have an ex-wife to deal with, maybe even step-children, and God help you then.  And if there are, then the ex will probably be a total nightmare, ‘cause if she wasn’t they’d still be married, wouldn’t they?  And I don’t mean an annoyance like you complain about Missy, I mean a real pain in the ass.  Though you may get lucky and find a nice widower- come to think of it, maybe you should go to Tony’s school events once he starts, you might meet some single fathers-”

Doesn’t this woman ever breathe? Malcolm rolled his eyes, glancing over at Rose to see metaphorical steam coming out of her ears; the one time he’d screwed up badly enough to earn that stink eye himself it had been enough to scare him straight.  At least for a little while.

Even as he watched her he saw the final straw break her back, uncertain of what it was having tuned Jackie out, but nothing could have prepared him for how Rose interrupted her mother.

“Malcolm and I are getting married.”