#i made this shit a year ago lol
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Ejejjdjdjdjd
#garfield#lyman#lyman garfield#doodle#cheldobryakk#shitpost#i made this shit a year ago lol#When I see my old Deviantart posts I want to kill myself#my art style was really fuckin ugly. Even more ugly then now
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briefly scrolled though the bigbang subreddit like recommended and - true, it definitely is active! which is fun. one of the first things i saw is that someone got into listening gd bc they knew him from the shoe world 😭😭 i mean that's just amazing lmao
#i just randomly felt like being a little more active in the fandom again but reddit seems too overwhelming?#so im just checking if tumblr truly is dead#i havent been active obviously but now that something is happening im curious again#my husband said yday that im not a fangirl anymore#and i was like sweety.... there just hasnt been anything to fangirl over lol#we listen to home sweet home#my baby loves it. especially the live from MAMA bc she loves to dance to it#so im excited for new music#wanna know sth?#i went through my ✨memory box✨ over the weekend#i have all my flights and concert tickets and stuff#alllll my bigbang stuff. everything#i have all the cd/dvd bundles#and i NEVER WATCHED THEM#they are literally untouched#also years ago i ordered the limited edition gdragon flower? road? thing?#i dont even remember but i literally paid hundreds for it and now i took it out like#lmao i never even used the mug#remember? the one with his handprint?#anyways i made some lemon ginger tea in it lmao#and also... years ago when i went to the concerts and bought the dvds to remember them#i told myself i will watch them some day when im at home with a baby#well... girl... nows the time lol#look at me rambling! lol i guess i miss sharing my shit on here#thanks for listening. and scene
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*voice of boy who just experienced romantic/sexual attraction for the first time* did you guys see that. that was insane. wdym you live like this
#um?????#i've had “crushes” before but that was just guessing#it wasn't until *checks calendar* two days ago that i discovered what y'all are talking about#that was legit insane#also very proud of my initiative. underneath it all i'm quite bold. got his number (re: asked him if he wanted my number which is much more#fun. also he later told me that it made him blush which is cute) and he danced with me.#and it was such a vibe???#like. i've been flirted with before#specifically a guy asked to dance with me (we were at a dance) and like. i did but it was really not it. i'm very enthusiastic when dancing#and there to have as much fun as i can and he was doing that awkward shuffle step thing and i could tell he wasn't really into dancing and#it felt he was bringing me down. dampening the vibe.#but with this guy we were vibing like crazy. he liked dancing! there was energy! he twirled me! it was insane you guys#also he has the cutest little southern accent#i didn't notice at first but my friend pointed it out to me and y'all it's adorable#got his spotify and we like a lot of the same music too#unfortunately he lives 2-3 states over (depending how you count)#we've been texting though#i met him at my competition so if we both win again i'll see him next year lol#finn says shit
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Magneto would love lumpia meanwhile Charles would have his Bibingka and Puto Bungbong hehe
Happy Holidays!
asks that remind me my bitchass friend kayla promised to make me *puto two years ago and she still hasnt
*puto is a filipino rice cake i do know it also means 'bitch' in spanish we do not have to address that thank you
#snap chats#'snap is the disclaimer necessary' every single time i mention 'puto' i get people clutching their pearls yes it is necessary vjAVKJ#LIKE I GET IT. CAN WE TALK ABOUT RICE CAKES NOW im hungry ...#kayla always gets beef from me but esp with puto and i only mention this when it was promised two years ago#cause SHE will always bring it up like 'oh yeah i still have to make you puto' bitch just forget it ive made it three times since then 😭#PUTO ISNT EVEN HARD TO MAKE LEGITIMATELY YOU JUST MAKE THE BATTER AND PUT IT IN THE SHIT AND STEAM IT#add a slice of cheddar on top if youre feeling especially nasty .... its so good .... anyway ..... rice cake ... i love it ...#i havent had bibingka in so long tho im PISSED. you know what else is really good tho cassava cake .. thats not rice but. lol#i never get to have filipino food on account of my mom hating cooking anything that isnt tiramisu knock offs#she really doesnt make filipino food she hasnt for years. my dad always does tho ..... whatever ....#i could always cook it myself of course. yeah... im lazy ill admit it you got me 😔#oh my god no you know whats great for the winter tinola I LOVE. chicken tinola so much#funny enough i learned how to make it when i was in the hospital from a filipino girl 🥰 we did not speak anymore after that interaction.#Also funny my fam and i were just talking about getting lumpia for christmas since theres like one (1) filipino place vaguely near us#'you guys dont make it??' on account of the fact im too lazy to make wrappers and no store near us sells any no <3#i did make lumpia myself once tho when we Did have wrappers after drivign out an hour to an asian market once#not to brag but they were pretty delicious ..... anyway ..#oh my god fuck me theres this like. speaking of rice cakes again JALKJKALJ theres this one with this delicious coconut sauce#BIKO IT'S BIKO its literally glutinous rice steamed in banana leaf with latik. UGH SOOO yummy ..... i dont have banana leaves anymore tho :#OH YOU KNOW WHATS ALSO GOOD FOR THE HOLIDAY lechon. that was my fave part bout goin to my dad's christmas parties#they had this big ass pig and i loved the ear .... crunchy as hell and so good 🤤 i havent had it in at least a decade tho..#now im hungry. and homesick. 'homesick for yoru dad?' homesick for my dad <- literally just saw him#well i get to see him again thursday :) goin to the doctor... gonna get my medicine again life is gonna be SO good !!!!!!#i have rambled far too long . happy holidays my friends !!!! do try to make puto this season ... very simple and very tasty .......
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parents are funny the way they want you to be open and honest with them, supposedly, but when you are, it leads to some fucking confrontation that didn’t need to happen, and when that happens, it leads to something you weren’t ready to say coming out, then being coaxed out into a still very much controlled held-back version of describing your lifelong experience feeling shame for existing the way you do and not being “easy” or as good as like, your little sister, academically, or as capable of masking as anyone else, and THAT carefully worded recall of just the natural fucking feelings of growing up in a frankly abusive household, resulting in.. oh, sorry, YOUR FATHER crying as if he wasnt just trying to gaslight you into thinking he didnt tell you the other day to Improve Yourself As A Person (right before the conversation about his mother entering hospice so now guess who can’t fucking mourn without associating it with that!) and that he instead was saying Improve Your Situation
and then he like catches you like visibly dissociating, comments, you try and put it in very simple words what just happened (in the same manner you have pointed out every other little thing he does to invalidate your feelings, or as he’d put it, “your feelings” yes using air quotes) and he suddenly is a fucking Psychology Scholar And Didn’t Need You To Explain What The Defense Mechanism Even Was and oh then also admitting to doing harm in the past, saying he had apologized (wonder why i dont remember), your mother(actual psychology minor) getting all “i’m sorry you feel that way” and also after a long ass tangent about there being a difference between “shamed” and “ashamed” as if you didn’t mean the word you say, a thing you did make very clear, ONCE AGAIN FUCKING CRYING ABOUT YOU BEING OPEN AND HONEST FOR ONCE AND TELLING THEM THEY HURT YOU
#its been. a wild fucking semester so far#oh and then also my fucking brother saying it’s like he doesnt have a sibling and i dont give a shit Sooo Much that i made my father cry#respectfully i fucking held the thing that would actually ruin him back.#because i did a fucking interview with his mother years ago for a class#and she talked about the way her mother treated her#when he first found out i was like. violently depressed as a teen#he drew the mental parallel of his mother getting hospitalized#for shit her fuckinf mother caused.#he cannot comprehend the pain he causes.#by all means my morher can comprehend what she does. she just. does she give a shit actually? lol#i feel for him. right now. in his grief process#but the fucking audacity to see me exercising autonomy and telling them they fucking traumatized me basically#AND COLLECTIVELY CONTINUINF TO USE THE FUCKING ABUSE TACTICS#im sure he was crying genuinely. but if i cry it is never genuine to them it feels#so.#yeah.#i havent been on tumblr i had a experiment thing for a class on social media breaks even though. lol. mental health? isolation??#but like. i think just the process of realizing wwwwhy we are the way we are#so immensely fucked up#its been a lot#its just. fucking sad i got forced into THIS conversation prematurely#but my fucking bad for trusting my mother i guess#vent#vent tw#anyway i was gonna push therapy back a week but. oooooooooweeeeee
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made a wholeeee smorgasbord of random foods and had a nice lil dinner with my niece. Let my indoor cat run around in the snow (she hated it)….I also ran around a bit….
#I have this intense need to take a very specific video in the cemetery of my favorite statue#and woke up to snow and by the time we got there it turned to grosssss ass rain#then it started crazy snowing of course after the sunset#got snowed in and went in to look and play guitars haha#it'll probably be gone tomorrow but someday i’ll get my snowy pics AND video hopefully#has to be snowing actively it's a very specific artistic urge ok#I have this rly neat motorized tripod gadget that my dad got me a while ago you can get the most incredible videos especially moving around#after my cemetery snow adventure I'm all set where's spring#my friends sending me palm trees and beautiful weather snaps and I'm sending back blizzard pics#made her gay very californian brother audibly gasp lol#it’s so pretty though I love the first few snows#I wish I wasn't scared of going into the cemetery at night like I would but l'd need a group of ppl to go with#my angel statue in there all snowy right now and I can't get to her 😠#it’s not even that far away too#need to get to mount auburn someday during snow tried that last year but barely got any#the roads are so bad though now I just drove my niece to her boyfriends up and down steep hills too#my car handles it well though compared to my old one holy shit idk how I survived winters#I'm about to be a plow driver because they genuinely suck so bad I could do better#pay meeeee
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a redesign of my steven universe peridot oc! i made this gal wayyy before the show peridot was introduced, so i've been reluctant to redesign her since her old design feels so iconic to me, but i finally gave it a shot and tbh i really like it. also went ahead and made her a first form to show what she looked like as a regular peridot before making her own form :3
also she's tall bc shes an era 1 btw. show peridot can just get good i guess lmao L
(she/her)
#has it been long enough since#steven universe#ended for me to be able to post this and not get swarmed#sure fucken hope so lol#anyway#her original design had half-shaved hair and translating that into something like a canon peridot's hair was..... interesting#i think it turned out nice tho#also i made the original design TEN YEARS AGO holy shit time flies#mine#art#my art#demon's art#oc stuff#su#crystal gems#fanart#steven universe fanart#su fanart#peridot
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be whimsical with me ok?
#original#myart#my ocs#these guys were first made four years ago?? and I was always too shy to share eep#sorry for the baja blast saturation csps shit colors on mac r rlly pissing me off LOL
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tfw a very sweet new mutual on historyblr direct message me some posts and i have to explain that i'm blocked by a non-insignificant part of this community because of the great The Spanish Princess War of 2019...
#the way this show made the absolute WORST come out of people that shit was insaaaane#people were out there coming at each others throat writing crazy ass callout posts worthy of 2012 tumblr and for what? for what?#a shitty ass starz period drama with ugly costumes and an extremely poorly written main character smh#also i say 'i'm blocked' but i also blocked so many people there that it's really a mutual thing and i truly don't blame them#i absolutely can be an obnoxious person when you already pissed me off and dead god did this entire mess pissed me off back then lmao#also i honestly thought both that show and that mess were in 2016-2017 at most i'm genuinely surprised that it was just 5 years ago#seriously tho i'm not blocked by 'that' many people it's like...a very particular subset of this unformal community#ifkyk lol
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you: nicholas alexander chavez, the actor from ryan murphy's recent work
me, a mama's girl and daytime tv viewer:
#text post#general hospital#nicholas alexander chavez#spencer cassadine#sorry i'm still not over my shock at this lol#i remember asking my mom MONTHS ago (she follows general hospital news online) 'hey wheres spencer i havent seen him in awhile?'#'oh his character died off. the actor is doing some netflix show where he plays a murderer'#and you have to understand. i dont consume anything to do w true crime. but to my 63-year-old mother. ryan murphy doesnt exist#so bc of just how self-contained the archaic institution of network soap operas are. i just. idk i didnt assume it was a big role#it didnt register to me that it was the sequel to the dahmer show. is what i am saying. and i never thought about it again#mommy made it sound like he might be coming back bc soap opera characters fake-die all the time#and so i put the thought out of my head until completely independently i was watching a video about monsters: menendez being flawed#and i was like. going absolutely insane w how familiar he looked i was like 'ok i know that man cant be too famous but i KNOW him'#'i know him from something and i know him WELL from something. like whatever hes from is iconic to me'#and then the video creator said his name and i was like THATS INSANE WHERE DO I KNOW THAT NAME??!?!??#it's a name i read in the credits but probably never thought in my head at all bc sorry he's just spencer to me#so i googled it and i was gobsmacked. i was like MOM DIDNT SAY he was gonna be in THIS SHIT!?!?!?#i also do lay my life down on the defense that the cinematography of a prestige netflix drama makes him less recognizable to me#who knew him best under cheap soap opera lighting in basic back and forth dialogue shots. like#i have to be honest i never cared for his looks on gh bc he just kinda looked like too perfect. like he looked like a mannequin#i see it now though i get it#i get why he's very fan editable to the true crime girlies i get it#not that it matters. im just in mourning bc it never occurred to me the spencer era was over. i actually liked his character#i cant tell u why bc he wasnt all that distinguishable from all the other basic dramatic character archetypes. idk it was a good performanc#i cant explain to u what makes a soap opera character distinct while still being completely generic (they all are)#i also liked his relationship w his girlfriend in the show it was cute. he was evil but they were sweet#nicky please come back. im begging u. as your only general hospital era fan who is your age#i dont wanna watch monsters menendez i reeeeeally dont
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"Crushed and broken," Gansey said. "Just the way women like 'em.” ― Maggie Stiefvater, The Raven Boys
#my edit#i made this like 4 years ago lol#so sorry for the shit quality (:#consider it my official come back to this blog#maybe it'll stick this time#the raven cycle#richard gansey#trc#ch: gansey#maggie stiefvater#tdt#lit#litedit#yaedit#trcedit#gansey
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#art#traditional art#watercolour#fanart#virvox project#shirakami kotarou#kurono takehiro#vocal synth#voicevox#another one based off the memories of some post i saw a while back. i was like possessed. to redraw vsynth characters in popular posts#also low key this was what it was like being 22 in university classes full of 18-19 year olds for a bit there LHJSKHJFSDAjdfs#THEY WERE nicer about it. but sometimes they would find out my age and i could see the 'grown ass' flicker across their eyes#especially when they topic of discussion was shit like sororities and me not knowing shit about it. in my defence i was 1) confused about#'greek life' for a while because i am mixed race and kind of ambiguous irl so i just assumed it was a like a cultural based society thing#(we have a lot of those in my school its very multicultural) and they made an incorrect guess about my ethnicity again and 2) when I DID#finally figure out what the hell 'greek life' was supposed to be i signed up cause a friend asked me to but i missed the first day of#orientation cause i was sick and then the sororities started sending really passive agressive emails to me so i got scared off LOL#random sorority sidetrack aside. it was really funny when i was like yeah i dont really understand the whole deal#and a classmate was like oh well yeah i guess you wouldnt have the experience how old are you again like 18?#and i was like........................................................i turned 23 a month ago <:3c#and her face journey as she realized i was like 3-4 years older than her.... my apologies my dearest classmate#sowwy for being in my early 20s. it wont happen again <3
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So bnha manga is over. BNHA was huge part of me over the years. So many read fanfics, so many AUs created. It greatly influenced my artstyle as Izuku was my comfort character to draw for so long. But interests pass and so was my obsession with bnha. Still, my bnha x blue beetle crossover was the most completed AU i ever had. Too bad i have never gotten around doing anything more for it. But i started making my first animatic. never finished it, as you can see (partly bc of my poor time and effort management. also i had no idea what i was doing and learning all the programs on the go).
I dont want to loose it tho, so im sharing what i made then as a 21 sec homage to bnha. thanks!
#i made it 3 years ago#at the end of my bnha era#kinda nostalgic bc of the manga finishing#i made it by copy pasting drawings form sai to thaoma2d and then to shotcut caveman style lol#animatic#bnha#bnha animatic#ater art#mha#mha animatic#mha animation#animation#i remember spending like 8h on that class shot what i was even thinking#people are mad at the ending of the manga but only thing i can think of are the fics. man i read so many fics#i reread canary recently#and im constantly thinking about yeaterday upon a stair. that scene with iida and his brother in the class...you know the one if you read i#oh i remember how it broke me the first time i read it. i cry every time i reread it. top shit 10/10 would recommend#i kinda wanna reread some of the fics. peak shit#i vaguely remember reading the cardcaptor au??? i think??? man i have to find it again. smth about maiden? minute maid?#no way i remember its name after all this years#ok i found it: I Can't Be a Magical Girl!! You a Magical Girl Say#whelp now i know what im reading this week lol
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#oh god#I'm dying#i had a really bad headache#the painkillers didn't work#i couldn't sleep all night#then i threw up#and was shaking like crazy#and i still feel like shit#like pls take my misery away 😭#my headaches are getting worse and worse each time#it's almost 9 am I'll try to get some sleep#personal#also lol why did i get a notification of someone mentioning me in a post#WHEN THEY MADE THAT POST 5 YEARS AGO
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I know it's prob pretty frustrating with the mitch narratives ppl have been spewing recently but the amazon doc is pretty harmless imo it reads to me as centering willys fire and desire to win a lot more than any negative thing about Mitch/Auston and ppl can say what they want (😭as they do) but it's nice to finally have willy shed the narrative of "not caring" and being "soft" so it's kinda weird to me how often you downplay his journey and his role for the team. not coming after you, it's just that he's also a leaf superstar that frankly got the shit end of the stick for almost his whole tenure here - more than Mitch!and he's finally come out the other side (and I wish neither of them did! but :// Toronto)
i don't personally find willy that compelling as a personality and i think his fans have to make up a lot of stuff just to try to shoehorn him into any interesting dynamics and narratives on the team (if one more person says he has daddy issues.. lolol). he can be his giggly harmless self overall, but i'm tired of hearing about how his range is in the same sentence with mitch and auston bc it's not from a hockey perspective, lol. you can love him best and evaluate him however you want, but i think he was just given a contract that is a slight overpayment and i'm sitting here having to hear abt how mitch marner is being overpaid on his current contract now knowing he's gonna be asking for prob over a million more than willy rightfully so like give me a break. i get that the discourse doesn't get to everyone, so good for you i guess, but seeing ppl gas him up to put mitch down naturally sours stuff for me, lol, and i'm tired of him being talked abt as some clutch savior when really.. last playoffs was inadvertently a microcosm of his play in general. "clutch" maybe but inconsistent (by no fault of his own in the playoffs w the migraines obv) which results in it being pointless in the end. i think some people have higher ceilings than others and all of them are doing what they can do most nights. judging effort level isn't my job, so it is what it is. i don't think he's soft/uncaring/lazy, but i find some things about his play and the way ppl constantly gas it up frustrating for sure.
i'm not even saying i think willy's part of the doc is filled with any storylines making any crazy statements against my guys or whatever. from what i've seen, it's just pretty surface fluff we already know about him. the stuff on the bench is nothing and didn't change my opinion about him, lol, but this is my blog and i'm venting my frustration about the way ppl were treating mitch bc of that moment as some character reflection. i haven't been a maple leaf fan since all these guys were drafted... but in the last few years, willy def has not been treated worse than mitch, so lol. sorry i can't retroactively care about the insults hurled at younger nylander (or critique of his game some of which was earned) lol, but i do think there are flaws to willy's game that are more annoying than the guys i chose as faves. i'm not some arbiter of maple leafs history, and i'm allowed to genuinely believe he's not as important as other people. you'll live with your opinions and version too. i'm sure i'm not changing your mind and i'm sorry it's not kumbaya over here atm. it will go back to normal after mitch extends and the heat's off probably, lol, idk.
#easks#like congratulations lol#u get the same ppl who used to hate him now insisting hes actually captain material over am34 and should have a letter over mitch#in general idk how many ppls minds were changed by that doc like from what i can tell nothing abt it was new info lol#its been a perception shift over time and a certain subset of fans are always gonna need a scapegoat#im just reacting to my fave being the one taking shit the same way u did back in the day im sure lol#lots of ways the fandomy side of the leafs talk has made me care abt him less like i was genuinely positive on him a year ago#now im just tired of hearing abt him a bit#everythign will eventually regress to a mean
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why is the minecraft movie literally one of those "umm... hes right behind me isn't he! 😅" 4chan greentext parodies of mainstream kids movies completely unoronically
#also it looks like shit. the human characters look so out of place. why not make them turn into minecraft block people when they get isekaid#into the game. youtube animators figured out how to make tjat look good years ago#tbh i think they made it tacky on purpose bc people will talk abiut it online like they did with the sonic movie lol#meowing
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