#i love you *gets sent to mega hell*

[cheswirls]

looking @ old fic i started when i was 14/15 is so funny bc im realizing once again why i never mark fics as abandoned even if its been literal years since i've touched them. specifically i was checking docs for stuff i started and either did or didn't post to ffn.

and its like. nothing is bad??? like i can see where my outside-the-box ideal of fic writing comes from. not just fics but writing in general, i'm p sure. even if it's a total cliche plot setup, there are details on each that rly make it stand out like oh yeahhhhhh i did have this great idea once upon a time.

funny too bc was it executed well in prose??? no absolutely not i wrote like shit when i was 15. would i revive an idea one day and revise it to be less cliche or cringy while still keeping the stand-out elements??? yea maybe. i might. everything i'm currently working on that i started from 2021 up to now still holds my supreme interest, but like i'm not gonna say never.

esp since i write fic first and foremost for my own need and specifically what i like to read, it makes it impossible to consider an idea i've thought extensively about "not worth writing anymore". anyway not making this too long i jus found everything interesting to consider

[partycatty]

i was sent an incredibly delicious prompt to use, and i just can't resist it omg. requester wanted to be anonymous, but just know i appreciate u! i won't lie, i ran into so many blocks trying to get this out. writing is hard :( i ended up taking a couple creative liberties anon i hope that's okay

bi-han > new tricks

johnny cage's girlfriend catches him cheating, so she tries to get back at him using bi-han. it's all fun and games, until something new starts to blossom.

warnings: u get cheated on, THIS IS NSFW, author struggles to write johnny in a bad light bc of their favoritism /j, accidental bottom bi-han

notes: i'm rubbing my hands together like a little fly rn, also bi-han's betrayal doesn't happen in this case, also also yes i made a gif of johnny getting his shit rocked for this fic thumbnail

masterlist <3

PART 2 !!!!

•you and johnny got together following the end of the storyline's events. he charmed you to holy hell and back with those dumb sunglasses and pickup lines at the academy. he was a sweetheart at first, love-bombing you endlessly until you accepted his thirtieth relationship proposal. deciding to stop dragging him along like a lost puppy, you finally said yes, and off you went to date a movie star!

•the change from being nobody to somebody was JARRING. suddenly, cameras were up your ass all the time, and you caught yourself staring out of your apartment window on multiple occasions to see people scurry away when they're spotted.

•even so, you can't lie. the parties that celebrities hold rival outworld's temptations. especially if johnny is hosting. despite downsizing from his mega mansion, his new home was still expansive enough to hold a large number of people. and boy did he take advantage of the space.

•everyone was a few drinks deep, you yourself were a little buzzed but with the intention of loosening up and socializing. johnny however, seems to have other intentions.

•johnny is canonically a recovering alcoholic. he'd indulge in a girly drink every now and then, maybe some whiskey on a really shitty day. but today, he must have combined the two flavors of vice and was now fitting his clothed dick into some random C-list actress's ass, grinding to the music. his sunglasses sloppily clung onto his nose and his face was flushed. drunk or not, he was dry humping some random broad at his own damn party, with you only a few feet away.

•you want to scream so bad, to tear her bleached blonde hair to the ground and beat her, and then johnny. but all you can do is stand there horrified, that is, until johnny looks up from his buried face in her neck and makes eye contact with you, eyes wide.

•"babe — goddamnit — babe!" johnny slurs out, holding your arms tight on his balcony. "it's not... fuck. it's just fun! it's a party! lighten up!"

•after a drunken back and forth, johnny eventually throws his hands in the air and tells you to fuck off because he can find better at that very party. although you heavily disagreed, the conversation abruptly ended when you slurred something back along the lines of "you want some other bitch? have 'em then!" officially ending your relationship and storming out of the party.

•the following few days were rough on your heart, and majority of the time your bed was occupied and loud sobs echoed across your walls. you could've had it all, dammit, and this dickhead just threw you away like nothing! he thinks he can just score any woman he wants, whenever he wants. even if he learned his lesson from cris, his playboy attitude runs in his veins. it's not something he's gonna shake easily, and you were a victim to his unchanging behavior.

•back to living with nothing, you decided to retreat to the one place you knew you were wanted; the lin kuei compound. bi-han, kuai liang and tomas respected your strength when it came to fighting against evil and welcomed you like their own.

•after about three days of living on the lin kuei's land, you check social media. you went ghost online after the breakup since the paparazzi and article rats were prowling the internet (and your home) for details about your breakup with the A-Lister. checking social media proved to be a stupid move, because almost instantly your feed was flooding with photos and videos of your ex-boyfriend partying on yachts and posing with models. he's really out here posting like he's not damaged in the slightest, but literally everyone and their mother can read the post a little deeper and see he's compensating for losing you. you were mature, well-spoken, and well respected, and he was still trying to get his shit together after everything that happened. you were just another crack in his shittily held together glass. and it was time to get back at him.

•it starts off innocently enough, you snap quick photos of the grandmaster when he's not looking, showing only his veiny arms and a hint of his blue uniform. you'd post it to your story to pretend to soft launch this new "boyfriend," linking a romantic song to the post and letting people run wild. this proved effective immediately, as you noticed that "UgotCAGEd" with the little verified mark would view your story almost the exact moment it'd go up. you knew that he knew exactly who was in the photo, and it just had to have been driving him up a wall. he even tried to combat this by posting more and more, each setting getting more lavish and sexy than the last. if anything, johnny was a chronic 1-upper. but you couldn't just post blurry pictures of bi-han forever. this needed to cut deep.

•and you were going to play this stupid game, because if he goes low, you go in the TRENCHES.

•"grandmaster sub-zero, i-i have a favor to ask you," you politely ask, bowing once before smiling up at bi-han. "i have a plan. a... ridiculous one. but it needs your help."

•"you want us to fake partnership?" bi-han asks you, trying to summarize your lengthy explanation. "go ask kuai liang. or tomas. they need something to do these days, with shang tsung imprisoned. i'm busy."

•"it can't be them, it has to be you," you respectfully protest, putting your hands in a prayer position to beg for his help. "johnny is... jealous of you. it would be most effective. and i'll be forever in your debt." bi-han's eyes momentarily widen at your insistence. your desperation for his help caught him a little off guard.

•it's true. johnny was jealous ever since he got his shit kicked in when they first met. they were never really huge fans of each other since then. standing in front of him now, it's easy to understand how bi-han was so superior. his emotions never took control, he was a powerful leader for his clan, and his furrowed brows and gravely voice rumbled inside of your chest... jesus, now that you're getting a good look, he's actually pretty hot. oh, no.

•"this is ridiculous," bi-han groans, trying to angle himself just right in the selfie. he stands behind you, hand wrapped around your neck as you try to angle the photo just right to where it only gives a tease of his face in the mirror's reflection. "how long does one photo take?"

•"it has to be perfect," you reply, eyes focused on your phone as you wiggle it in different directions to get the best possible view. "crouch down a little more, so more of your jawline shows."

•he leans down, and his breath fans across your neck and ear as he sighs in frustration. you can't deny the little tingle it made you feel inside. but hey, anyone would be nervous if a brick wall like bi-han was in breathing vicinity...

•you snap the photo, seemingly satisfied but now fighting a flustered expression. when you look it over, you realize no, this isn't enough. johnny would leak his own sex tape with a model to beat you at this stupid game, and while you weren't necessarily ready to start blowing the ninja, you knew you needed to get one step ahead.

•"can we take... one more?" you ask sheepishly, already trying to put into words what exactly you're going to ask from this expressionless man.

•"only if it's quick," he replies with a frown, crossing his arms.

•you take a deep breath, spinning to face him and nearly chest to chest from the tightness of the small bedroom you were given.

•pointing to your bed, bi-han almost instantly understands. his lips turn into a thin line as his cheeks are brushed with warmth, warmth that he tries to conceal from you with his hand as he rubs his face.

•he sits himself on the bed, propped up on his elbows with a knowing look in his eye. it's difficult to maintain eye contact as you crawl onto the edge of the bed, hesitant to do what you wanted. for a moment, you want to pull away and trash your entire plan. there's no way you were about to climb up and sit on a ninja grandmaster's lap as revenge against your movie star ex. how in the genuine hell did you end up in this situation??

•"come on, woman," bi-han grumbles, sitting up for a moment to abruptly wrap his hands around your hips and pulling you to sit atop his lap. you tense up, realizing you're now straddling him... and lowkey, he looks good under you. he also just manhandled you. hm. curious.

•you try to shift yourself to comfortably rest on his hips before seeming satisfied with the position. shakily, you reach up to snap a selfie, one that conceals his face but shows you sticking your tongue out and flipping the bird.

•and then you felt it.

•at first, it went unnoticed due to your nerves about the uncharacteristic closeness. but, once you settled to snap the photo, you realized that... bi-han was rock fucking hard underneath you. you weren't sure if you should acknowledge it, but regardless, it felt so perfectly sized against your clothed folds, and you make your interest unintentionally obvious when you let out a nervous whimper. bi-han's eyes remained trained onto yours with a hint of hunger in his low-lidded gaze. even though he wanted to initially hide the boner, it was now abundantly obvious and he felt a surge of confidence gauging your reaction. the hands that rested on your hips tightened, his cold fingers digging into your flesh.

•"you feel that?" he grumbles out, his body feeling suddenly incredibly hot against yours. you swallow and nod. as you do, his firm grip starts to rock your hips back and forth against his cock, the friction of the fabric dividing you two sending you wild already. "whose is bigger?"

•"...yours," you answer breathlessly, allowing yourself to be controlled by the cryomancer's hands. your confession was true, too. johnny's dick was long and lean, but bi-han's.... lord. it felt thick. even through layers of clothes it felt like it could tear you down the middle if he pounded hard enough. a new part of you wanted to find out.

•with a sudden haste, bi-han hikes up your skirt and top, holding the clothes bunched around your waist as he abruptly gives you even closer contact to his cock. you could feel it twitch and throb, and every part of you wanted to sink it into your throat to see how well it hugs your mouth's fleshy walls. his hands crawl underneath the bunched up clothes and settle on your hips, this time directly gripping the plush of them.

•a shiver shot down your spine, both with sudden arousal and the frosty trails on your body from his fingertips. even if he wouldn't admit it, he was just as excited as you were. he let out a low growl feeling your pussy leak through your panties and dampen his dick.

•"i hated the way he looked at you," he'd grumble, eyes fixated on the friction he was creating by manhandling your frame to grind against his. "wanted you all to myself — ngh —"

•you wanted so badly to stop and unpack that wild, sudden confession, but you were already fiending for his popsicle like a motherfucker. through your hazy vision, you see bi-han lock eyes with you, a devilish glint present. he reaches between the two of you and palms himself while you try to relieve the pressure on your clit using the back of his hand.

•finally fed up with the foreplay, bi-han pushes you off of him, making you elevate your body on your knees. he tugs his shirt up and his pants down. his member springs free from the tight constraints, and lord help us all, it's as long and thick as it felt through the pants.

•"you wish to get back at that pompous wannabe?" he asks, voice dangerously husky. "get to it then." obeying like a dog, you settle between his parted legs. still holding his dick, he slaps it against your cheek expectantly.

•the tension, the hunger, and the high emotions overtook your strength to remain proper in front of the grandmaster as you eagerly licked at the base of his shaft, trailing kisses all the way to the warm tip. once you feel properly sure of his size, you slowly but surely sink him into your mouth, barely able to get his dick deep enough without causing a strain on your jaw muscles. bi-han tries to keep his arousal under wraps, but when he feels you hollow out your cheeks to give him the greatest pleasure possible, he lets out a little whine of surprise, though it still sounds more animalistic due to his grumbly voice.

•you hold this position for a moment, letting your warmth completely encapsulate his freezing body. you were starting to see stars in the corner of your eyes before bi-han harshly pulls you up by your hair, making you sputter for breath. a thin trail of saliva follows your lips as he raises your head.

•"wait," he commands breathlessly, fumbling with his other hand to find your phone that was discarded onto the mattress. when he does find it, he struggles even more, mind blank from horniness and also his unfamiliarity with smart devices. you chuckle to yourself, climbing back up to his chest and weaving your way between his arms to show him how to record a video. when it's finally figured out, you crawl back down to where you were and grab his cock with a full hand, stroking it lazily. he winces.

•"sensitive already?" you ask in a low tone, giggling to yourself. bi-han didn't have much time to relieve his sexual desires, so it's no wonder that the slightest bit of head nearly sends this man flying to the moon. "i expected more from you, grandmaster—"

•"—shut the fuck up," he replies sternly, not finding your teasing all too funny. "i'll silence that whore mouth."

•woah

•and with that, he holds the phone up, angled downward at you as you angle your lips on his tip again. he grabs the fistful of your hair and sinks you down once more, this time holding you in place. you barely had time to get some air in before getting your throat thoroughly plugged. you put your hands on his thighs to ensure you'd stay upright, but always sure to look at the camera as you gag and drool.

•"that's more like it," he'll purr, pushing your hair from your face as he holds you still. he then directs his voice to the camera. "how about that, cage? taught your dog some new tricks. i'd say she's exceeding expectations."

•when he finally lets you breathe, you only get a couple gasps before willingly taking his cock again, this time bobbing rhythmically. bi-han, as a ninja, is incredibly good at staying silent, so all he can do is let out occasional exhales and sharp intakes of breath as you suck him off.

•you're sure to put on more of a show than usual for the video, looking into the camera with a sultry smile even with your lips stretched out to accommodate for his giant dick. you've got an expression that says "fuck you."

•when bi-han has enough of your pace, he starts to buck his hips into your throat, creating a nasty gargling sound in the back of your head that would be otherwise nauseating. you're surprised he's not ripping the hair straight from your scalp as he death grips a fistful. frosty hands grip the sheets, solidifying them with a thin sheet of ice as he nears the edge. his body can't decide between lurching forward and arching back as you make him cum.

•he's a silent orgasm-haver. bi-han bites down hard on his lower lip as he releases, clenching his eyes shut and knitting his brows together. and boy, does he love to ride the high of fucking your face. he loves it even more knowing he'll have an audience.

•he wanted to cum into your mouth so badly, but even he knew better. he had to make the money shot something memorable. cum painted your face beautifully, dripping down your cheeks and catching in your eyebrows. there was even a thick streak starting from your hairline. with no time to ever do this himself, his jizz accumulated within him for quite some time, now soaking your entire face.

•bi-han stops the video, but only to snap photos of your messied, flushed face. gripping your cheeks to hold you in place, he's sure to make sure every drop of cum is within camera shot as he catches his breath.

•you swipe a glob of his load from your forehead and stick your finger in your mouth, tasting his arousal for you with a smirk.

•"definitely sending that to him," you giggle as he tucks his dick back into his pants. "i'm in your debt, bi-han." normally, he would've protested the use of his first name from an associate of liu kang, but he was too high from his orgasm to really give a shit. instead, he grumbles a small "mhm," and nods, fighting a little smirk himself.

•he stands up and grabs a loose towel, holding up your face more sweetly this time as he wipes you clean. the gesture was oddly soothing. he seemed like a pump and dump kind of man, and he probably is! but you're touching a sweet spot he didn't know he even had. even so, he's silent, never once communicating this and instead expressing it through the minor gesture.

•a relationship doesn't quite blossom yet, but the sexual tension between you two is now incredibly obvious to the lin kuei. his gaze lingers, as does yours. the touches during training last a moment longer. your silly little plan of making johnny angry seemed to have blossomed a new... situationship? we'll unpack that some other time.

•the following morning, your phone rings. it's johnny.

•"DID YOU BLOW THE FUCKING ICE NINJA?!"

[velvetsainz]

summary: [ cl16 x fem!reader ] charles is away in baku and you remind him of what he's missing. part two.

word count: 1.3k

content warnings: smut under the cut (minors dni pls!), pwp, use of explicit language, phone sex, masturbation, google-translated french (lmao), a dash of fluff, i like em dashes too much

a/n: baby's first smutlet! i've been writing for like twelve years but i've never posted to tumblr, so here's to first times! there'll def be at least a part ii to this, but i'm also hoping to write for other drivers soon(ish). also giant mega thank you to @multiseb21 + @lecrep for your support—y'all have been so incredibly sweet & i am so thankful for you!! anyways, i hope y'all like this! enjoy, loves! xx

“Chérie,” his voice crooned over the line, a soft laugh leaving your lips. “Don’t tease, mon ange—it’s already hard enough being away from you for so long.”

“Weren’t you the one who said he’d be fine just a month ago?,” you retorted, voice low.  The cards were in your hands now, and Charles was desperate.  He was a nomad lost in the desert and you were his oasis on the horizon, just the sound of your voice enough to slake his thirst.

“Yes, but then you sent me that picture and—” You hear him curse again under his breath, his fist acting as a poor substitute for the velvet heat of your walls. He swore he wasn’t going to let you leave that bed once he got his hands on you again.

Charles wasn’t entirely wrong: you were the biggest fucking tease known to mankind.  Earlier that evening you sent him a semi-absentminded photo of you fresh from the shower, steam still obscuring the best parts of the photo with a fresh white towel around your hips and one gathering your hair on top of your head.  He’d always had something about you fresh from the shower—every time he’d nearly pounce as soon as you’d pad back into the bedroom from the steamy confines of the bathroom, hair wrapped on top of your head just as it was now.  (Part of you thought it was something primal in him: you’d washed away his scent on your skin and he needed to make his territory known again, that horn dog.)  Still, he was ever the gentleman and would make the endeavor more than worth your while.

“Yeah, that was pretty bad of me, wasn’t it?,” you ceded with a knowing smirk on your lips as you sat back from your desk, closing your laptop slowly.  You’d wanted to get a little more work done after your shower, but the Monégasque wasn’t keen to let sleeping dogs lie and needed to hear your voice for himself.

“So bad, chérie,” he agreed with tone of exasperation, a heavy sigh passing through the phone, “And you’re not even here to help a–”

“That doesn’t mean I can’t help in other ways,” you were quick to remind him, the words coming from your mouth quicker than your shame would force you to bottle them up.  Heat was creeping to your cheeks, and you could feel the familiar coil of desire tightening deep in the pit of your belly.

“Are you—?”

“That’s why you called, isn’t it, baby?,” you asked only to get a stifled groan from the other side. “You wanted me to tell you how I’ve been thinking about you all day,” you continued, “how I miss your hands on my hips, your cock so deep—”

“Fucking hell,” Charles practically whines as you push yourself away from the desk now, allowing yourself to relax into the seat of the chair and your hips to ease apart despite every part of you wanting to grind them together to relieve the dull ache that rested between them.

“What would you do if I was there now, Cha?,” you asked softly, hand splayed out over the plush of your thigh, eyes glazing over as you pictured him there with you.  You wanted his hands everywhere; you couldn’t decide where you truly needed him most. Fingers curling against that hidden spot in your tight cunt, threaded through your hair and pulling your head back to rest on his shoulder, gripping your thighs so tight they’d leave bruises that he’d fuss over later—it all sounded like heaven compared to the lonely hell of your shared Monte Carlo flat.

“I want to taste you, mon cœur,” he replied shakily as his breath came faster, the sound of him fisting his cock becoming more and more prominent as time passed; he wasn’t going to last long like this, but you both already knew that—it wasn’t the point of this exercise.  “I’d have you coming on my tongue, let you taste yourself when I kiss you—putain,” the driver cursed once more as his brow furrowed.  He was leaking precum over his ironclad grip and all he wanted was to slide his fingers past your plump lips to feel the wet heat of your tongue take care of the mess.

You let out a tremulous breath over the line, one you hadn’t known you’d been holding onto so tightly until your head started swimming with need.  Your hand had drifted from its origin, rubbing lazy circles over the cotton of the panties you’d slipped into after the inciting picture.  On your top half was a worn, faded shirt of Charles that you’d taken a liking to as a nightshirt—especially when you were missing him as you were so desperately now.

“Need you in me,” you begged, the emptiness you felt so acutely coming to the forefront of your senses, “You always do such a good job filling me—my fingers don’t do you justice.”

You hear a groan on the other side of the line, the man now sitting on the edge of the bed as he tries to keep himself in check.  He wasn’t ready for this to be over so soon; you had him feeling like a teenager again, ready to spill at a moment’s notice. Granted, this wasn't anything new: there's something so intoxicating about you that destroyed whatever semblance of restraint, of control he had over his lust.

“Want you in my mouth, give me something better to do than tease you like this,” to which you received a choked merde, the man hanging on your every word as the hand between your legs abandoned its objective—you could take care of that later.  You were too caught in every little sound that passed his plush lips, listening for every little cue his body so willingly gave you.

“Want your hands in my hair, guiding me up and down your cock,” you keened for him on a whine, his breathing heavy and labored.  He was running at full speed to the cliff's edge, and you were there watching, waiting in the grass. “Want your cum on my tongue, baby,” you whined.

“Promise not to waste any, minette?,” he grunted, gritting his teeth as you hummed your assurances.  “Such a good girl f’me, yes–”

With a strained hiss and a groan he came sloppily over his hand, thankful enough that he wasn’t home in Monaco so he didn’t have to worry about cleaning up the mess he’d made. “Fuck,” he croaked, breathing heavy as he came down from the blinding high your words had catapulted him through.  It wasn’t like he hadn’t been taking care of business when duty called, but something about your voice, the thought of you there…it clutched everything into a higher gear.

“Better?,” you asked, sly smile audible to the Ferrari driver; he didn’t need to see you to know the shit-eating, satisfied smile that took over your lips.

With a tired laugh he nodded, slumping back onto the cool rumpled sheets of the hotel bed as he stared absently at the dark ceiling.  It was three in the morning in Baku, and he couldn’t sleep—the thoughts your cheeky picture had invited wouldn’t let him.

“Get some rest, tiger,” you teased him, knowing he’d have to be awake in a few short hours. You debated sending him another picture in the morning as motivation, tiding him over until you’d join him later that weekend.

“Que ferais-je sans toi, mon amour?,” he asked, sleep heavy in his voice as he rolled the right way onto the bed and running a hand through his hair.  He’d deal with the mess he’d made in the morning along with the flowers he’d send you—he really didn’t know what he’d do without you.

“I guess we’ll never know, hm?,” you replied gently, smile melting into something softer as you fiddled with the gleaming ring on your left hand.

[dottowos]

desiderium.

synopsis: Omega desires you in ways he cannot have you, so he has to make do with what he’s given.

includes: dottore (omega) w/ fem! reader

notes: Omega touches himself while fantasizing about you - so none of this actually happens, he just really wishes it would. Established relationship, oral (reader receiving), vaginal sex, creampie, lots of teasing, posessiveness, he makes you beg and cry, he's a lil freak tbh, reader uses no pronouns, mdni (tell me if I should add anything.)

It wasn’t really a secret that you were the object of the Second Harbinger’s affections. Frequently it would be witnessed by shocked agents the depth of attention you were given by not only the Doctor himself, but also his segments. Hell, you were the only one who could ever interrupt their experiments!

If you asked the Omega segment, there were numerous reasons he could list as to why he found you so endearing. First, your mind was ever so interesting. He loved to pick at it, discover new ways to make you tick or blush. Not to mention how he loved to do research with you. Your perspectives could be quite helpful, especially when compared to the agents who feared opening their mouths.

Moving on, he loved your expressions too. When your eyes crinkled gently, full of love, and when a great smile stretched across your face. Or when you were pouty and ignoring him because he didn’t give you enough attention, though he always knew how to get back on your good side. And your voice, it was refreshing to hear after ungodly hours spent in a lab.

And you - you in general, you were attractive. He had only seen you nude a few times, but he had every spot and curve of your perfect body mapped out and memorized in his mind. Sadly, it was more of a see, don’t touch situation.

It was evident only Prime Dottore had that opportunity. 

Your… nightly activities with Dottore were rather obvious to the other segments. There weren’t many explanations for why you would walk around the lab the next day a bit sore with numerous marks around your neck, despite your attempts to cover it up. Prime didn’t need to say anything - his message was clear.

Still, that didn’t stop Omega from desiring you. This was one such moment he found himself fantasizing about you. He had been working continuously for a long time and hadn’t seen you much, so this was a much-needed moment of respite. He sighed as he leaned back in his chair and began to palm himself. 

Omega knew you’d feel just as good as you looked - his hands twitched, trying to imagine your skin against his, and so did his cock. He made quick work of his zipper as he imagined how you’d look under him, a common scenario.

He had always wondered how you’d act. There were so many possibilities he could think of, all of which sent a thrill throughout his body. Knowing you, you’d probably be shy about it. 

“Omega,” you whined, as your hands half-heartedly tried to stop him from undressing you, embarrassed by his forwardness. For some reason, you didn’t think he’d want you in this way too. “A-Are you sure?”

“Positive,” he purred, intent on seeing you laid bare and all needy for him, his hands already set on squeezing and playing with your soft breasts as you softly moaned. He had only ever heard such cute noises in his head, unfortunately. But he would continue to draw them out for as long as he could, mercilessly teasing you and refusing to touch you where you really wanted him to.

But regardless, all of these scenarios ended with you obediently taking his cock. However, as much as he wanted to be inside of you, he couldn’t forget about how much he wanted to taste you. Yes, your taste, he thought as he licked his lips and pumped himself again. 

“Ah, ‘Mega, please…” your breath hitched as he experimentally rubbed his finger over your clothed cunt, your wetness seeping through, “don’t tease,” you fruitlessly demanded as he ignored your plea. Omega would take his time with you, savor your sweetness like he would with one of your baked treats. He was a very patient man after all. (You? Not so much, but you would have to deal with it.)

Eventually, he would slip a finger, and then another, and then one more inside your aching pussy and hold you down as your back arched, pinning your hands above your head as you were insistent on trying to cover your mouth. Your moans were one of the loudest and most accurate proofs of the effect he had on you, and he refused to let them be silenced.

“Now, now, what did I say about that? Try to do that again and I’ll stop.” You could only let out another choked moan and look at him helplessly as he curled his fingers inside of you, and then sped up his pace until you finally finished all over his hand. It was almost filthy how he began to suck and lick on his own fingers that were drenched in your essence, concentrating on tasting every last drop. You wanted to look away out of embarrassment, but you were entranced by the scene, probably because it was just that hot.

Of course, that would only be the beginning of it. There was no way he would be satisfied with just that. Barely giving you a chance to recover, he pried your legs open further to lick and suck at your cunt, relishing in how your thighs squeezed around him - he’d make sure to mark them up some more later. Your hand was tangled in his hair, alternating between trying to push him away from coming too much or pushing him further down on your needy pussy. He didn’t care, either way, your juices would be smeared around his lips as he made sure to lick it all up. By the time he was done with you, you’d be struggling to even call out his name, eyes hazy and too far gone.

As Omega thought about you more, he stroked himself faster until he was almost close. But he had yet to bury himself inside your tight cunt. 

It was all too easy to tease you, reveling in how your eyes darted around nervously at the sight of him pumping himself as he prepared to enter you. You licked your lips and swallowed as you briefly wondered how you’d take him. Ah… your mouth too… Omega decided he could brush his cock against your supple lips another day.  

The segment nudged his tip leaking pre-cum against your cunt, on the verge of slipping in until he pulled out just at the right moment, teasing you as he delighted in your frustration. He would only ever give you what you wanted if you begged for it, his favorite subject.

“Use your words, darling.” You gripped the sheets harder at his stupid insistence.

“P-Please… please, I want- need you inside, Omega,” your plea came out as a ragged breath, desperately needing some relief already. Unfortunately, your lover only hummed, seemingly unsatisfied with your response, and continued to hold your thighs steady, still pressing himself against your pussy. You huffed in slight irritation. 

“Please Omega, just fuck me already,” your words came out speedy and rushed as you sniffed, a tear rolling down your face at how intently he was staring at you with his singular red gem. Finally, a content grin appeared on his face now that he had gotten what he wanted. Perhaps there was still some work to be done, but now even his patience was wearing thin, especially when you had declared your neediness for him so blatantly.

Lining himself up with your entrance, Omega began to push himself in slowly, wanting to drag out both your and his pleasure, and also having the uncharacteristic consideration to make sure you weren’t too overwhelmed. Your walls fit snugly around him, offering him pleasure that he could have never reached by himself. Your legs were hooked around him, tightening as he finally buried himself completely in you.

“Omega… Omega…” you breathed out his name, adjusting to the sensation of being filled with his cock. You moved your hand to intertwine with his (because of course you did, you were too sweet for your own good) and he quickly did so, locking his fingers with yours. Pulling back out, he moved to kiss you which you reciprocated, before slamming back in, your scream muffled by his lips on yours. From then, he pounded into you without mercy, making sure to give every other part of your body attention too, from licking your tears to sucking and nipping at your breasts.

From the way your nails harshly dug into his back, he could tell you were close. He knew his mind couldn’t sufficiently replicate how lovely you’d look once you came on his cock, but he had to try anyway. Picking up the pace, he continued to ram into that one spot and rubbed your clit. He wasn’t far behind - if he had not met you, the segment would have continued to think that chasing such a high with another person was a waste of time. But now that he had you in his grasp, a part of him could understand why the desires of humans overtook their common sense. Logic had no place right now, for you were completely intoxicating. 

Snapping his hips into you with one final thrust, he felt your walls squeeze around him as you came hard, his name only a half moan as your throat was sore from too much talking. The feeling had Omega holding back his own noise as he came too, still keeping up a mostly unaffected demeanor although that was far from the truth. Omega remained inside of you for a little while, stroking your cheek as you caught your breath, before pulling out and watching his cum ooze out of you.

A perfect sight. A perfect mark. A perfect claim.

As he came to, Omega sighed at the mess staining his hands. It wasn’t as nearly as satisfying as his little fantasy, but it was something nonetheless. 

Couldn’t you see? See his selfish need for you, see how his gaze burned into you at particular moments, or how he traced your collarbone for a few moments too long? If only he had a chance, he could give you pleasure beyond what his creator could give you, he’d make sure of that. Any way you wanted it, he’d make sure you’d be blissed out.

… Well, regardless of his desires, Omega had to clean up and get back to work. Maybe if he was lucky, you’d break into his lab despite him telling you he was busy and cuddle on his lap, unaware of his previous pastime.

[zephyrchama]

hi! i’m the same anon that sent the long-ish ask before about how much i love your writing and how it’s really special to me. i saw that you wrote something about leviathan that was similar to the lucifer duality post, in the rad archives server. im like embarrassed as hell to be saying this here on anon because it’s cowardly, but i’m a lurker in that server because i’m anxious (lol), and i still want to express in some way that i really like both of those posts a lot. even though i didnt make it to the levi one in time.

i also really resonate with them but the levi one more so (probably some bias since he’s been my favorite for 4.5 years). i wrote a very long ramble about my interpretation of it but i felt like it was too long and i’m embarrassed (again) about it and its. very redundant. so i’m not including it. lol. so i understand you deleting the original levi duality post.

but anyways, it hit me hard (knocked me unconscious and kept swinging when i was down) and. actually made me tear up. so, once again, thank you Very much for your wonderful blog 🫶🫶🫶

You!!! [insert emoji that points at the viewer here] Hello!!! That message was so incredibly nice. It was incredibly well written and thoughtful. I spent so many hours alternating between blushing at the wall and pacing around. Thank you so much!!

(Don't be ashamed!! You're not cowardly! I'm also mega super shy. I feel bolder in public discord groups where there's a lot of talking going on because whatever I say will eventually be washed away by the conversation, but totally get that it's nerve-wracking to speak with people.) (I am nervous now hahaha. I must face the consequences of my post-deleting actions. I shall grow and learn.)

So, someone mentioned they get notified when I post!? and that they got the notification but it led nowhere. Apologies for that! I typed something up on my phone and deleted it in shame because after a while it had 0 notes and I thought perhaps it was out of character or poorly written. Sometimes my ideas flop, that's fine and I always leave them up anyway because I like them, but last night a little voice in my head made me anxious and we do silly things when we're anxious.

Here's what the post was for those that missed it, apologies again for deleting it:

---

Leviathan, Avatar of Envy, ruthlessly blasting a hole through Mammon's door and flooding the room to get his money back. Giving the cold shoulder to those who dare speak with him. Glaring at everyone he passes like they're dirt beneath his feet for being normies. Nobody is worth his time. He has more important things to attend to.

Leviathan, Avatar of Envy, weeping as he gently cuts into a pancake shaped like Azuki-tan that he, himself, ordered. He spent fifteen minutes taking photos and now the pancake is cold. His face is red and his body shakes with silent sobs while lifting a bite to his mouth. A passing waiter asks if he wants any butter. He nods. A tear rolls down his cheek and falls onto the collar of his limited edition Azuki-tan t-shirt.

[see-arcane]

Well. I just read the Robert Eggers Nosferatu (2024) script in its nascent 2016 form. Quick and haunted thanks to @nosferattusx2 for making me aware of its existence. It’s here on the Internet Archive if you want to give it a look yourselves.

I don’t know if it’s legit, but it seems precariously close to the trailers. Even if it is the real thing, it’s also an eight-year-old rendition of the script, so there’s no guarantee of it being an exact mirror of what will hit theaters. That being said?

It’s. A lot.

SPOILERS BELOW

I won’t regurgitate the whole thing here, just the main bits that stood out to me for better or worse:

For a guy who says he's very against the sexy romantic vampire trope, Eggers makes sure to have everyone getting scared and horny over Orlok at every opportunity. I will give him grudging kudos for not confining this strictly to Ellen or otherwise Just the Ladies~. The thing opens on Knock stroking himself to the concept of the guy and Thomas gets his own erotic/assault-flavored attack from Orlok at the castle with future allusions framing it in a distinctly sexual framework. Ellen is set up as the ~darkly tempted Eve to Orlok’s Adam~ but it’s not aggressively mega-hetero about it. Progress?

Thomas arrives in Orlok territory and immediately gets swarmed and pickpocketed by smelly-masculine Romani people (referred to strictly by the g word through the script) bar the one pretty young teenage girl one who we later get to see riding naked on a horse because only naked virgin girls can lead the group to hidden vampires for their destruction. Yeah.

…

Bobby Egg, I can get behind the VVitch using seductive evil weirdness and I see why mermaids would swim around topless, but. What the fuck? And also follow-up what the fuckery to the whole portrayal of these guys, period? On that note.

Here we see the first example of Thomas being Assigned Twink at Comparison to All the Other Men. Eggers frames him as insecure beside the masculine Romani and has a future character refer to him as a ‘dandy’ (despite that being a term reserved for men who were well-off, not just effeminate/less than manfully manful). To Bobby Egg’s slight credit, Thomas is not portrayed negatively or milksop-shaped because of this; it’s just. Kind of there. All the time.

Count Orlok’s description isn’t bad. Very ominous, very classic gothic-supernatural. I do appreciate that he’s explicitly given more corpse-like attributes, making him seem like a mobile cadaver more than anything else. And Eggers does keep him creepy—no stealthy Count Fuckula spit-shining on him.

Shovel scene sort of happens as an original Dracula nod, but with no payoff. An attempt was made and thrown away.

Ellen. Oh, Ellen. Such a double-edged piece of work here. On the one hand, this version of the script implies that she isn’t doing the classic bastardized Mina thing of deciding her lame lameo human husband isn’t good enough for her and she needs herself a REAL MAN. There’s a lot of the original Thomas and Ellen’s genuine love and regard shown in the couple…

…up to a point. Eggers writes them a very very ugly and basically wholly OOC argument to do with Thomas claiming he wed her out of pity and saying she ought to have been sent to a madhouse when she was young, which itself was a follow-up to Ellen yelling that Orlok’s work is all his fault in a weirdly victim-blamey way and a scene that felt less like a badly done seduction and more like she was trying to actually assault him. They seemingly both reconcile after this, but like…what the entire hell?

Okay, to get this out of the way—I think Eggers is trying to lean hard into the ‘well in the actual time and place of the story things would be so grimdark and depressing, so it has to be nasty even between the loving main couple, and it adds to the horror-misery of it all, and it makes Ellen’s dark temptation~ more reasonable!’ thing. We can see a lot of that in how he sets Ellen up to have a history of dark thoughts, a lot of stigma surrounding her sanity/insanity, and there’s some very cruel medical ‘treatment’ she gets subjected to during her fits while waiting for Thomas and/or Orlok to arrive. Naturally those fits are all sexual/orgasmically twitchy because of course. Eggers is very much trying to set Ellen up as sympathetic in her situation and as a kind of next evolution to the Francisified Mina character who wants to fuck Dracula/Orlok/Death so so bad~

And then we get to the Van Helsing stand-in, Von Franz, and he is…oh man. 90% of his bits are fun. Interesting. The last 10% would make Abraham van Helsing in every iteration punch through the fourth wall and beat him to death with their library books. Surprise, Von Franz and Ellen both secretly colluded to set up the sunrise trap that will inevitably kill Ellen via Orlok feeding on her into the dawn. Von Franz purposefully leads the vampire hunter crew astray, including Thomas. When Thomas discovers this—from Knock who he mistakenly staked in Orlok’s place due to a mix-up with the coffin—Von Franz laughs as Thomas and Dr. Sievers the pseudo-Jack Seward make a run back to the house to try and save her.

The climax comes with Ellen and Orlok playing out the original Nosferatu ending. She dies happily cradling Orlok’s carcass. Thomas reaches her bedside and collapses in despair. The script closes on Von Franz showing up with a lilac bouquet and putting his hand on Thomas’ shoulder as he grieves, still unmoved from the bedside. Close on Ellen’s dead face ‘at peace.’

Somehow the scene doesn’t end with Thomas wringing Von Franz’ neck.   

There’s a lot more to read in there, obviously, but those were just all the big lumps sticking out of it to me.

I will grudgingly say it is not the absolute worst-case scenario I was afraid of. It’s not what I was hoping for—but that is keeping in line with Dracula and Nosferatu-adjacent media, per tradition. I do still want to see the film, I do want to like the finished product, even with the worrisome second trailer and sundry interviews throwing up red flags. Like The Last Voyage of the Demeter, it is at least an earnest attempt at taking this vein of classic gothic vampire horror seriously as a horror story.

But also.

I would really like directors to stop turning the Mina-Ellen figure into the vampire-pining gothic blowup doll for the latest ‘Bold and Subversive’ take #1654237 of GIRL AND THE DRACULA DO KISSY SEXY ROMANCE TIMES. An impossible dream, I guess.   

[writemekpop]

Boy's a Liar | Lee Donghyuck (Haechan)

Summary: One day, your nudes show up everywhere in college. Did your boyfriend Haechan share them? 

Genre: College AU, cheeky Hyuck, angst

Word Count: 2k

Four letters. Blood-red, smeared over your locker in lipstick. 

SLUT.

Goosebumps ran over your body. Hands shaking, you tried to wipe the words away, but it only stained your skin red. You could hear snickering from behind you. 

Your heart was in your stomach. You heard people’s whispers.  

“I heard she sells her nudes for money.” “You know she blew the entire ice hockey team once.” “She even lets her boyfriend do anal!”

Chenle, basketball captain and mega bully, shoved past you. 

"Ever heard of plastic surgery? I wouldn’t touch that with a ten-foot pole.” He jeered and high fived his friend Jisung, who was doubled over laughing.  

You frowned. You spotted your best friend Winter and pulled her into a classroom. "What the hell's going on? Why is everyone being so mean to me?" 

Winter bit her lip. “Oh baby… you don't know?”

"Know what?"

Winter handed you her phone. "Don't shoot the messenger."

It was the Griffin college class of 2024 chat, with all 150 students. 

You nearly dropped the phone when you saw it.

It was your picture – no, it was your nude. You were lying in bed, completely naked.

“What the hell is this doing on the group chat?" 

The picture was followed by lots of comments and laughing emojis.

Winter snatched the phone back. "I think you've seen enough."

Your knees gave way and you slumped to the floor. Guilt, shame, fear, were all welling up inside you faster than you could process. You burst into tears. 

 Winter patted your back. "How did that picture even get out?"

You sniffed. "I dunno. The only person I sent it to was... Haechan."

The realisation dawned upon you. It had to have been him.  

Haechan was your boyfriend. He was the cute boy who was always ten minutes late to class, with warm brown eyes and a devilish smirk. He was the boy who would never let you leave his room without wearing something of this – a beanie, a hoodie, (his boxers, once) – so you ‘wouldn’t forget him’.   

You'd only been dating three months, but you loved him, and he loved you back… or so you thought.

You stood up. “I need to see him.” 

Winter squeezed your hand. “I’ll be here if you need me.” 

---

It wasn’t hard to find Haechan. 

He was in the cafeteria, surrounded by a group of boys, being cheered on and fist bumped. Haechan was grinning like he had just won the lottery. 

Your frown deepened the closer you got. 

“Can’t believe you smashed her, bro. Nice one!” Johnny, one of the seniors, said to Haechan. 

Haechan smiled awkwardly. “Err, thanks I guess…”

“Give us all the details!” Johnny said.

Haechan shrugged. “Well…”

When Haechan spotted you, the smile dropped off his face. 

Doyoung, another senior, pushed Haechan to the side and stepped towards you. He raked his eyes all the way down your body. 

“Hey baby girl, I heard you’re gagging for it. Wanna take this for a ride?” Doyoung grabbed his crotch, face leering.

 You resisted the urge to slap Doyoung. “The only thing I want is to run you over, asshole. Fuck you!” 

You stared at Haechan, waiting to hear the string of curses he would unleash on his friends. But he just stood there, rubbing his elbow, trying to avoid your gaze.  

You turned and sprinted out onto the field. You couldn’t take this any longer. You ran till your legs started to ache.

You heard a voice from behind you. “Y/n, wait up! Jeez, I forget you’re freakishly fast.” 

It was Haechan. You turned around to see him gripping his side, wheezing. 

His dark hair was a birds’ nest, and his brown skin was glowing with sweat. You hated that he still looked gorgeous. 

“What do you want?” you spat. 

Haechan straightened up and brushed his hair out of his face. “Y/n. I’m so sorry… the photo, I-“

“How could you send that to everyone?” you said, interrupting him. “That was meant for your eyes only!” 

Haechan shook his head vigorously. “No! I didn’t send it to everyone, I swear!”

You frowned. “Then how did it get out?”

Haechan gulped, looking incredibly uncomfortable. “Well I mean… I did send it to Jeno. But I told him not to share it with anyone! I made him swear on his mother’s life!” 

“What the fuck, Haechan! Why would you do that?” 

Haechan sighed. “Look, Jeno was bragging about all the hot girls he’s slept with, and showing me their pics. I just wanted to… be included.”

"That's the stupidest thing I've ever heard!" You shoved his chest. "I hate you!"

You turned around, ready to leave again. 

"Wait!" Haechan grabbed your arm. 

You looked into his big, shining brown eyes. Would Haechan finally take responsibility for what he’d done? 

But instead, Haechan whined, "It wasn't even me, though, it was Jeno!"

You yanked your arm away.  

You had turned down Haechan's best friend Jeno a year ago. Ever since then, he'd been cruel to you. Was this his form of payback?  

You huffed. "You’re the one who shared the photo in the first place! We're breaking up. Obviously."

Haechan made a face that reminded you of an abandoned puppy. "But why? I said sorry like a bajillion times!” 

"Oh you're sorry, are you?" You said, your voice rising. "Everyone’s calling me a mega slut, when I’ve slept with one guy. You.” You groaned. “We only had sex four times, for god’s sake!” 

"And those were the best four nights of my life!" Haechan said. "Please don't do this."

You scowled. "Why do you need me, anyway? You could have any girl you wanted… Mr Stud. Oh, face it, you loved the attention. All those guys clapping you on the back…”  

Haechan screwed up his lip. "What do you want me to say? Those guys didn't even know my name before this!” 

"Well you have plenty of time to hang out with them," you said. “Coz don’t have a girlfriend anymore.” 

Haechan hung his head, brown hair flopping over his eyes. 

You sniffed. You’d wanted to be tough, but you it was impossible. Tears began rolling down your cheeks. "What if my parents find out? Or my professors? Can people get expelled over this? Oh my god!"

Haechan stretched his arm put to comfort you, but he pulled it back at the last minute. He stood there in awkward silence as you sobbed. 

After a few minutes, you finally managed to stop your tears. You felt utterly exhausted. 

Haechan was still standing there. He was digging his nails into his palm, the way you knew he only did when he was extremely stressed. 

You both stared at each other, waiting for the other to speak first. 

"I'd like you to leave now, Haechan." 

Haechan sucked in a breath, his brown eyes glistening. "Okay, I'll go. But I really hope you can find it in your heart to forgive me." 

You scoffed and turned away. You couldn't look at Haechan right now. One glimpse of his cute nose or the moles on his cheek would be enough to melt your heart.  

You didn't turn back until his footsteps had completely retreated. 

---

The next three weeks were rough, though nothing was as hellish as that first day.  

Mostly people had gone back to ignoring you, but you still avoided any parties or big gatherings. 

What hurt the most was losing Haechan. 

He wasn't just your boyfriend; he was your best friend too. You missed cuddling him at the end of a long day, you missed hearing him sing in the shower and then come out in nothing but a towel and a smirk. 

You also missed the sex. You had barely started doing it, and you were enjoying getting to know his body and your own. You had just discovered that Haechan's weak spot was his ear lobe, and that if you kissed it just right, he would purr. 

You should never have sent that stupid nude. You should never have trusted Haechan. 

You felt like the ground had disappeared beneath your feet.

Haechan had texted you a thousand times, but you ignored them all. At least he had the decency to stay away from you in class. He'd just watch you from the other side of the room, a mopey expression glued to his face. 

---

The next day, you were in the library, face buried in an organic chemistry textbook, when you started hearing increasingly loud murmurs.

You looked up and saw people running out of the library.

You were about to get back to your homework when you saw Winter running towards you. 

She was waving at you frantically. "Y/n, come quick! It's Haechan!"

Your heart was in your throat as you followed Winter and the increasing crowd of students into the cafeteria. 

When you saw Haechan, you gasped. 

Haechan was standing on top of a table in the centre of the cafeteria. His arms were spread wide, and he was shouting at the top of his lungs. 

"My name is Haechan and I'm twenty-two years old." He yelled. "And this..." He reached for his belt buckle. "Is me naked. Take a good look, people!" 

The crowd collectively gasped. 

Haechan shoved down his trousers and underpants to his ankles, and stood there, hand on his hips. 

You could see his strong tanned legs, his muscled butt, the dark patch of curly hair at the base of his completely exposed penis.

You smacked your hand across your mouth, unable to believe what was happening. 

Everyone was staring. Some people started giggling, others pulled out their phone and started recording. 

Winter, who was standing by your side, started to boo, but you elbowed her in the ribs, shutting her up. 

"Get down from there at once!" The piercing voice of the Dean shocked everyone. Most people dispersed. 

Haechan got down and pulled up his pants. He walked towards you, seemingly unbothered by the yelling professors and laughing students all around. 

He stopped in front of you and stuck his hand out. 

"Hi, I'm Haechan," he said, smiling. 

You shook his hand tentatively, ignoring the way your skin buzzed where you touched him. 

"Err... what are you doing?" You asked, half chuckling. 

Haechan's expression turned serious. "Look, Y/n. I know what I just did doesn't make up for what I did to you but... I'd really like for us to start again. I miss you, a lot." 

You paused. "Hmm... I don't know about that, Haechan."

Haechan's entire body deflated. He looked devastated as he nodded solemnly. "I completely understand," he said, turning away.

"Wait!" 

Haechan turned around. His eyes met yours.

"But… I will let you buy me a coffee. And we can take it from there."

Haechan could have beat his chest with happiness. 

—

MAIN MASTERLIST

Let us know what you thought in the comments or on anon! 💋

[cenviswasteland]

dmmd yuri

fuck it. why the hell not

literally nothing about aoba changes she just wears skirts now. same snarky attitude same goofball mannerisms etc. oh wait actually one thing Does change and that it's that she DOES actually top oh my god my only pet peeve of dmmd is that aoba never topped clear

rens voice is still comedically deep for such a cute allmate. in rhyme she is a beautiful woman and it Will stop you in your tracks.

koujaku

noiz is so transmasc coded to me that i really don't know how to make this yuri. do i dare say i could see yuri-noiz as a he/him lesbian or will that get me sent to super ultra mega turbo internet discourse hell

clear is a robot so she's just programmed a little different and boom woman time. the ultimate weirdgirl. i love her already. i imagine her in a big skirt that definitely poofed out with her raincoat in her original introduction sequence. i fear she may be subjected to a panty shot or two but unfortunately that is the price of peak

i think estrogen could save mink honestly. not elaborating on that because again i think ill get torn to shreds?

anyway yeah. dmmd yuri. live your truth man. this was fun to think about lol

[pianostarinwonderland]

TWST Valentines Cards 2023

Hell yeah, it's that time of the year again.

Going to make another post keeping record of this year's set of letters. Some cards haven't been found yet, so this post will be updated as I find more cards. If there is an asterisk beside a character's name, that means I only got the text itself but there may be errors and needs to be verified with the picture of the card itself. If any of you have pictures of letters that are either not there or need verification and don't mind showing to anyone, please send to me through DMs!

Since the cards freshly came out and some are still waiting for their own letters, all letters will be posted under the cut!

Riddle Rosehearts

My dear friend— Thank you for the lovely sweets. I'll have them on my study breaks. If they're good, perhaps I'll set them out at a tea party. You'll certainly be invited if I do. After all, there's no rule that states you can't join.

Trey Clover

Hello, friend— Thanks so much for the gift. It was exactly my taste, with just the right amount of sweetness. I can tell you thought a lot about what to get. I'll come up with a recipe based on these sweets sometime. I hope you'll taste test it for me.

Cater Diamond

Eyyy, friendo! Sweets aren't normally my jam, but the ones you picked out were PERF—and they looked great too! You must've put in some WORK picking them out. So, thanks! I'll make sure to do the same for you!

Ace Trappola

Heya, pal— I kinda freaked when I saw you left a present at my door—in a good way! You actually sent me sweets! You could've just given them to me in person, you know. I haven't had any yet, but I'm sure they'll be great! We should share them at lunch tomorrow.

Deuce Spade

My good friend— Thanks for the amazing gift! You got me those mega-popular sweets we just talked about, right? They were so good! It's kind of a shame I ate them all. Have you had any? I guess it'd be weird if I gifted you the same thing, but come shopping with me sometime and we can pick out some sweets for you.

Leona Kingscholar

Hey— You give me SWEETS? I swear, sometimes I don't know what goes through that noggin of yours. I'll be nice and say I appreciate the sentiment...this time. But don't expect any glowing food reviews.

Ruggie Bucchi

Hey, 'sup. I got the sweets you sent! It's always a good day when someone gifts me food. These are supposed to be real popular right now, yeah? They must've been hard to snag. Shyeheehee, that makes them doubly good! Thanks a ton!

Jack Howl

Hi, I was surprised when I smelled something sweet at my door. Consider your present received. I still can't believe you gave me such cutesy-looking sweets. Not that I'm unhappy about it, of course. I actually like candy and stuff. Thanks.

Azul Ashengrotto

My boon companion— Thank you for the heartfelt gift. I suppose I owe it to you to partake of these sweets. Don't worry. Once I've analyzed the flavor, I'll gift you something equally delicious. After all, fair's fair.

Jade Leech

My good friend— You've outdone yourself. Sweets that pair well with black tea? My deepest thanks. I'm flattered that you thought of me so when selecting them. You've inspired me. I'm going to spend my mountain hikes pondering just the right tea blend to suit your palate. I do hope you'll enjoy it.

Floyd Leech

Dear little shrimpy— I saw your present. You got me candy? That rules! I was JUST in the mood for something sweet. I might not be tomorrow though, so I think I'll polish them off today. Thanks.

Kalim Al-Asim

To my dear friend— Thanks for the present! What colorful and sparkly sweets. They look delicious! I just had an idea! How about we eat them together after school? Gifts like this taste better when shared, after all. I'll pick out a good tea to go with them. Can't wait to see you later!

Jamil Viper

Hello— I was surprised to see you gifted me sweets. At first I wondered if you were hinting for me to make you something similar... But when I pulled the gift out of the bag, I saw all the details you put into it, right down to the ribbon. It's clear this was a heartfelt gesture. I'll treasure these treats as I eat them. Thank you.

Vil Schoenheit

Dearest friend— Thank you for the gift. The sweets were dazzling and most attractive. Did you try to imagine what I'd like when picking them out? If so, you made an apt choice. I'll have something for you later in return.

Rook Hunt

Bonjour, and merci beaucoup! What a lovely batch of confections! They’re so darling that I’m tempted to stow them away in a brilliant bejeweled box. Ah, but I jest. I’ll enjoy every morsel of this gift you’ve so thoughtfully bestowed upon me.

Epel Felmier

Dear friend— Thanks for the gift! Sweets from the city have a real fancy vibe, don't they? I'll savor every bite. I know this isn't exactly a gift, but I just scored some coupons for the cafeteria. Wanna join me for lunch tomorrow? Just wait for me, and I'll find you!

Idia Shroud

@YOU huh? What the wha? im low-key scared here why would u give me sweets??? ig that sometimes i run low on sugar when ive been gaming too long and my aim becomes trash... ok sure, if this is ur way of looking out for me, ill take it

Ortho Shroud

Hello, Prefect― Thanks for the present! The sweets were very charming and cute, not to mention colorful. What neat designs! I'll make sure to save this as a special memory. I've run the data on their base ingredients, and hope to gift you some fitting sweets in return soon.

Malleus Draconia

To my dear friend— Thank you. Never did I envision someone presenting me with the gift of sweet treats. It would be a shame for me to eat them all by myself. I think I'll share them with you. Would you be willing to provide the tea to go with them?

Lilia Vanrouge

Greetings! Your present was delightful. The treats had a subtle sweetness that was perfect for a slightly mature fae like myself. I'll be making you a lovely treat in return, using a very special recipe of mine. I hope you'll enjoy it.

Silver

Salutations— Thanks for the gift. I read once that sugar can boost your concentration. Did you give me these to snack on when I'm about to nod off during my studies? That was very considerate of you. I think I'll try them out today.

Sebek Zigvolt

Human— I've received your gift. It was agreeably sweet. In fact, it might've been sweet enough to make black coffee bearable... But I digress. Regardless, I was somewhat impressed with your choice. You have my thanks.

Grim

Dear hench-human— Mraaah! Is this ALL for me?! I've never seen such sparkly, yummy-lookin' candy before! I feel like a king! But I'd feel bad leavin' you out of this sugar extravaganza, so I GUESS you can have a small piece. I'm lookin' forward to more gifts, partner!

Dire Crowley

Dear esteemed student— Thank you for the delicious gift. And don’t bother telling me I was supposed to share it—I’ve already finished the whole package! If you wish for the staff to also partake, I suggest you acquire more treats. But don’t worry, I won’t say a word if you give the same gift twice. I’m kindhearted like that!

Divus Crewel

Dear pup— Is this a gift for the staff? Excellent. Now that I have some treats to sweeten my breaks, I'll be able to grade your exams with a much more critical eye. I can see the grimace on your face now. Relax, it was a joke. It's usually frowned upon for dogs to be the ones buying gifts, but since you're such a loyal pup, I'll let you off. I'm a generous trainer, after all.

Mozus Trein

Dear juvenile— I must wonder why you decided to get me a present. Is this your way of thanking me for my lecture the other day? If so, gifts are hardly necessary. It's a teacher's job to educate students with a thirst for knowledge. I can't accept any offerings from students, but the sentiment is much appreciated. I expect nothing but excellence from you moving forward.

Ashton Vargas

Dear student— Thanks for the present! Excessive sugar is a no-go when building a beautiful bod, but it'd be bad form to let your thoughtful gesture go to waste. Such is the price of popularity. I'll just have to accept that and work off everything I eat. Keep up those reps!

Sam

Yo, little imp! What is UP? Thanks so much for the gift! You've got a real eye for quality. I'll make sure to stock up on goods that'll pique your interest, so swing by the shop soon!

[skyeoak]

Tmagp 30 thoughts

Vocal performances all slayed. 10/10

I think there’s a lot of good and bad in the finale! But overall, it feels underbaked. (Or overplotted/overplanned?)

I’ll save my finalized thoughts on the hilltop center to see if it’s developed in further seasons, because uh, hmm. Jonny said in the live drop that carousels of horrors were his favorite to write, but they sure are not realllyyyy my favorite to listen to. They’re kind of thematic scattershot. And yeah, one of my critiques about TMA is that I don’t love how we only rarely see how the fears combine and interact. Having multiple creepy things in a curiosity cabinet -com shopping center doesn’t really solve that problem for me.

The idea of a character turning a blind eye to an obviously creepy job is still interesting, especially in how it parallels the staff of the OIAR. But that’s kinda the start and end of my interest in the custodian? It feels like this story could have been shrunk to 1/3 length and had a better effect. I just feel like this should have been a midseason statement, and the finale could have focused on having some sort of action or tension. Honestly, I wasn’t expecting the finale to have a statement at all, to be structurally in line with early TMA. Maybe a full statement/story from Celia, giving the non-TMA audience some idea of why she thinks there’s nothing to go back to in her universe. Hell. Maybe she could just. Tell Sam, uncompelled. I would have loved to see her try to convince him to jump. Convince him that her new life matters more than his (perceived) failure of one. Instead… this is another episode where I feel like the double meaning titles weigh down what the statement could be. And it’s the season finale.

I wondered early on if the finale for this season would feel more like setup for future seasons, and yep. Yep it did. It just felt like there was this inherent tension between the stakes of the story, which are already at interdimensional travel, and the level of danger it feels like everyone is in. Not to mention how Celia just drops a list of alchemical balance things out of the blue. Magnus Protocol is in a tricky situation: they need to set up a new conflict and new characters, and at the same time, Magpod has already done mega-apocalypse hellscapes and so TMagP might feel the need to go bigger. (Imo I don’t think sequels always need to raise the stakes but I understand that’s industry standard). It’s also tackling alchemy, a notoriously complex subject that’s probably hard to explain to an audience in any way that feels natural. You can’t just throw murder worm lady and screaming main character in the finale and call it a day. There’s a lot going on, less time, and I don’t know if the characterization this season was consistent (/consistently good) enough to hold the full weight of it all.

OKAY, WHELMED THOUGHTS OVER, now for the good! Surprise surprise, it’s all the little character payoffs!

Gwen and Lena’s confrontation was EVERYTHING. Gwen is kicking anthills, and Lena is so content to let her stand in them while the ants crawl up her legs. I won’t lie though, I’m not sure if this plotline will be interesting to me. I think it depends on how fast the OIAR staff can get Gwen to actually be on their side.

Sam deciding to protect Celia by pushing the archivist into the void is SENSATIONAL CHARACTER PAYOFF. (This is my interpretation of the scene, audio was super unclear once again, and there was a line change from transcript to podcast that made this super ambiguous in the actual canon audio.) My poor guy has ZERO self esteem, and still wants to be a hero. He probably realized that if what Celia just told him was true, an archivist could actually kill her on the spot. My guess is that (tma spoilers) this balanced the rift not because Celia replaced her own missing soul (plenty of folks got sent through hilltop road in that same incident) but because an archivist+a person were pulled through to replace Jon and Martin. Truly excited to see where they end up, and if this archivist gets developed more as a character next season. Also the implications of interdimensional balance on what happened at the end of TMA are… interesting.

Oh Alice. Everything in this intricately balanced house of checking up on people and soothing them and deflecting tension with jokes is about to come crashing down. I’m so sorry this is happening to you.

And yes, this is a super lukewarm episode review but I do wanna say I liked this season a lot, and TMAGP is still a cut above a LOT of horror I have read/listened to this year. I’m hoping seasons 2 and 3 will either steer further into a direct TMA sequel, angle OR steer clear and become their own thing. TMAGP is stuck uncomfortably in the middle right now. Just be the good parts of her. But completely new.

[divinemare]

Req: Fourth Wing Violet x Xaden

Song: Dangerous Hands by Austin Giorgio

Maybe an early training session on the mat that turns a little spicy ;)

i cant believe i slept on this request for so long bcos i hadn’t seen it, I LOVED THE SONG AND WRITING THIS. i’m so sorry this took me this long to see but i hope you enjoy this. it’s short, not extra mega spicy, but i honestly liked it.

thank you so much for the req and lemme know what u think!

Dangerous Hands

FOURTH WING ONE SHOTS: Xaden x Violet

summary: just xaden being a horny for violet, honestly

tw: a lil bit of spice

Light filtered through my windows, warning that I had officially lost any chance of rest whatsoever. Only now, after hours in the dark contemplating how fucked up I was, did I come to feel the exhaustion of a night without sleep.

As I slowly rose from my bed, stretching my muscles and massaging my neck in search of false relief for my aching muscles, the pressure in my chest that hadn't left me all night increased in intensity to the point where I felt a fire burning inside me for every memory that came back to me.

Her mouth; so close to mine, her legs; spread wide as I lay on top of her, her chest; rising and falling with such acceleration as sweat drenched her body, and her hands; her fucking hands, all over me like chains that wanted to plunge me into the depths of hell.

Who knew, that a woman who looks so innocent could have such dangerous hands. I craved her in the morning like a mad man, I craved her in the night like a starving man, I craved her every fucking hour of every fucking day like a desperate man.

There was no hour, no minute, not even a second, when I wasn't cursing myself for not being able to stop thinking about what Violet's hands could do to my body. To my whole body.

Including that stupid piece that kept pressing on my trousers with the memory of her chest pressed to mine as her dagger, the one I'd custom made for her, was pressed into my neck last night.

Her heartbeat matched mine as her open lips made way for my mind to imagine scenarios where, that same mouth, was open wrapped around my dick.

I had no fucking idea how I was going to get on with my day, to see her, and not think of all the things I wanted to do to her when she was underneath me on the floor last night.

"You can do better than that," I said to Violet as I sent another of her daggers flying away.

Violet rolled her eyes in irritation, causing that tick in my chest to rise in intensity and a smile to pull my lips sideways.

"Shut up," her attack came fast and accurate, and I couldn't help the small low chuckle as I dodged her attacks and launched my own.

From one moment to the next, Violet had me on the ground, a moment's distraction was all it took for her to find my weak spot and exploit it, just as I taught her. But here it turns out, my weak spot, was the whole woman who was now on top of me. The very peace in all my war.

"You’re not laughing so much now, huh," she said between quickened breaths as she carefully placed her knee on my dick.

"I taught you well, Sorrengail," I smiled sideways, hiding that burning desire to wrench the smile from her face with my lips on hers.

Damn, I was so hot, I wondered if Tairn and Sgaeyl were doing their thing. Or if what I was feeling for Violet was simply getting out of hand.

"But I must do a little better," my hand flew to her throat and, without pressing too hard, I rolled her on her side to position myself on top of her, her throat still under my hand.

There were lines I still didn't know if I was crossing with her, thoughts that kept me awake at night, my secrets haunting the infinite possibilities of fucking all this up. But as long as I held her like this, close to me, with my body pressed into hers and my heart beating to the same rhythm, it all stopped mattering.

Everything except the absurd desire that invaded me to kiss her, to touch her, to make sure that everything in her was mine, and everything in me was hers.

Then a dagger was pressed to my throat, and my dick pulse it hurt.

"Fuck, Violet," I closed my eyes at the feeling of the cold dagger, unable to look into her eyes that were silently begging me to tear her apart.

"What?" She asked, her chest rising and falling with the intensity of the workout we were in, but her eyes detonating a mischief that added fuel to my fire. "Am I doing it too good?"

"Too fucking good," with the hand I still held on her neck I began to make circles with my thumb on her throat, moving down her chest until I reached her breasts.

Her back arched into me, as if asking me to touch her, not to stop, so I did, I squeezed her breast and made her sigh, gasp with the same desire that was already pressing in my trousers so hard I felt like I was going to explode. The dagger in her hands fell the moment I slipped my hand under her shirt and started playing with her already hard nipple.

Her hands went to my ass, squeezing it and pulling my hips closer to hers, my dick to her own pants.

A soft moan at the contact caused me to crash my mouth against hers to silence the sound of pleasure.

"We don't want to make too much noise, now we, Violence, or they're going to know we're not exactly training before I can make you explode with real pleasure."

"You're way too confident," she taunted, but the flash of pleasure and hunger in her eyes gave away how aware she was of all the ways I could make her come on this mat.

"Oh, and I'm about to show you just how much," as I brought my lips to her ear to murmur the words, I made sure to press my erection against hers and rub until her gasps flooded my chest with burning desire.

Just as my sanity was lost in her sounds, her dangerous hands crept upon my body, her touch leaving traces like a feather of flames.

[pale-opal]

Hear Me Out 2:

So. I know that this image, like the ones in the last post I made, is incredibly niche. I also suspect that, the MMX and Warrior Cats fandoms, much like the Mega Man and Homestuck fanbases, probably don't have that much overlap. However. I am not going to let that stop me from drawing this conclusion: if the books existed in the MMX universe, Axl totally would've read Warrior Cats. And he would've loved it. To prove this, I am going to write an entire multipoint essay about this strange little reploid, and this somehow stranger series of books. Buckle up, folks. This one is going to get wild. Now, first things first: I need to explain what Warrior Cats is. For those of you not in the know, Warrior Cats (also known simply as Warriors) is a book series that follows several different groups of cats known as "clans" through their time in a forest. Every writer who has worked on the Warrior Cats series has done so under the pen name "Erin Hunter". However, some of the authors identities are known. For example, the first few arcs were primarily written by a woman named Victoria Holmes. - The cats are not anthropomorphic (for the most part). They are feral. Humans exist, but they can't understand them. Pet cats are referred to as "kittypets." - A clan cat receives several names during their lifetime. If they are born into the clan, they are born as [noun/adjective]kit. As an apprentice (a warrior cat in training), they would be called [noun/adjective]paw. Once they become a warrior, usually at 12 months (or "moons", as months are referred to in the books as such) of age, they will become [noun/adjective][noun 2]. Cats who are the appointed leader of their clan are known as [noun/adjective]star. Cats that join a clan from elsewhere have a chance to go through this naming system as well, but they do not have to if they don't want to. Cat names will be used interchangeably, depending on when that specific cat had that name. - Leader cats have nine lives, of which are given to them by Starclan (cat heaven). There can only be one leader at a time. Also, there is a hell-equivalent known as the "Dark Forest". Dead clan cats get sent to one of these two places after death. Their ghosts can also die - either through fading (being forgotten by the living), or through severe injuries and other similar causes of death. - The clan cats follow a set of rules known as the "Warrior Code". It is mostly composed of basic rules, such as not being allowed to kill cats for no reason, not being allowed to quit being a clan cat to go live with people, etc. However, some more complex rules were added. An example includes a rule that allows a leader to be disposed by their subordinates. - I will be discussing spoilers for the entirety Warrior Cats series. If at any point during this essay you want to put on a life jacket and jump ship so you can experience these books blind, feel free to do so (however, I do recommend skipping to the final few bullets of the "Additional Notes" section before leaving the cruise, as I do mention topics that I think would be a disservice to not warn new readers of beforehand). I also have to provide a content warning for violence because these books can be dark sometimes.

Part 1: Character Arc Cousins Something that makes a book or story likeable is relatability. And how do characters become relatable? By having experiences that readers are likely to have gone through themselves. And if we go through the Warrior Cats series, we find that there are quite a few characters that Axl would relate to. For instance, there's Firestar:

Let's go through a list of the things he and Axl have in common: 1. Born as a kittypet named Rusty, Firepaw leaves his home to join Thunderclan because he feels he's meant to be doing something else with his life. Axl leaves Red Alert when they become evil, and joins the Maverick Hunters because he doesn't feel that it's right for him to be using his copy ability to harm innocents. Shared experience: leaving home to pursue their destiny. 2. Firepaw spends the majority of The Prophecies Begin (the first set of Warrior Cats books) trying to prove himself worthy of being in Thunderclan, even when he becomes Firestar. Axl spends all of X7 trying to prove himself to the Hunters, and continues to work toward doing so when he fails to win X's approval, even after all he's been through. Shared experience: proving themselves to people who are older and more experience than they are. 3. At the end of The Last Hope (the final book in the Omen of the Stars collection), Firestar dies from his injuries in a fight against the ghost of Tigerstar I (long story), his final life being spent protecting his clan. Guess what happens to Axl in X8? If you guessed "gets a mysterious black crystal shoved into his head by Lunime's corpse after working together with his homies to kill him, leaving him in a near-comatose state," congratulations! You're right! Your prize is... um... the satisfaction of being correct! Huzzah! Shared experience: dying/becoming severely injured after working to secure the greater good for their loved ones.

Firestar's not the only character Axl would relate to, either. There's also: - Squirrelfight (both characters do reckless things to keep others safe, and have an early habit of rushing into things. They also have trouble getting older people to take them seriously.) - Hollyleaf (both she and Axl betray people they care about - and they both do it with murder, too. (Axl has to kill the members of Red Alert, while Hollyleaf betrays Thunderclan by killing Ashfur (note: to clarify, Hollyleaf did not betray Ashfur specifically. She betrayed the clan by breaking the Warrior Code (although one could make the case that she didn't actually break it, but that's a whole issue of its own))) - Dovewing (similar to Firestar somewhat: both Dovewing and Axl work with older characters, and struggle to fit in with them)

Usually, the more relatable the characters are, the more a viewer or reader will enjoy the story. And with four whole cats that he can feel free to project himself onto, Axl's all set to have a great time reading Warrior Cats on the basis of the characters alone. But that's not the only reason he'd have a heck of a time. There's also:

Part 2 - The Drama of it All

Let's make another list. This time, we'll take note of what Axl likes, what kind of person he is, stuff like that. Axl: - Is trigger happy. Literally. One of his lines in X8 directly states that the thought of fighting mavericks "makes [his] trigger finger itch". The boy lives to fight. - Is a child. Based on his behavior (not taking certain things seriously, wanting to be treated as an equal to those older than him, being easy to amuse), as well as the way he is voice acted (he had a female VA for X7, and a common practice in voice acting is to give male characters who haven't gone through puberty a voice actress or a male VA who is younger or around the same age as the character being portrayed. Additionally, the voices given to him in X8 and Command Mission are at a somewhat higher pitch than X and Zero's - while he does sound older, it's clear that he's younger than X and Zero) tell us that he is not meant to be the same age as the other members of the Hunter trio. Warrior Cats is aimed at middle-school aged children. Keep this in mind. - Despises injustice. He ditches Red Alert when they go maverick, and spends an entire game trying to become a Hunter. And after he becomes one in between X7 and X8, he gets darn good at it. By Command Mission, he's an S-Class Hunter alongside X and Zero. Oh, and in X8 he shoots Lunime in the middle of an evil laugh and tells X and Zero to disregard his evil monologue that he just finished giving.

Based on all this, I think it's safe to say that Axl would enjoy how Warrior Cats includes the following: - The first antagonist, Tigerstar I, attempts to kill Bluestar (the leader of Thunderclan prior to Firestar), kills several innocent cats in his quest for power, and manipulates a dying clan to become its leader after getting exiled from Thunderclan. And how does he get his dues? By getting killed by the second antagonist, Scourge, with all of his lives being taken by one wound, (yes, this is considered a children's book series). And Scourge gets killed by Firestar, who takes him out after coming back to life from Scourge killing him first. You know. Like a boss.

- The majority of Warrior Cats start off as kits or apprentices, meaning that they begin their journey as children and/or pre-teens/teenagers. Recall the target demographic for the books. Now recall how old Axl is. I think you see where I'm going with this. - All of the major villains in the Warriors series meet a terrible fate, one that matches their horrible actions. We already talked about Tigerstar I (and Scourge, to a lesser extent). Now here are some other examples: Brokenstar: He forced kits (aka BABIES) into becoming apprentices before they were of age (6 moons old) (which is not only against the warrior code, but also dangerous because... well, I think we all know why it's a bad idea to send an actual baby out to do certain things like hunt or fight against entire adults in any context). He meets his end by getting blinded and poisoned by his own mother. And then when he dies, he goes to the Dark Forest. Ashfur: After becoming bitter over how Squirrelflight chose another man over him, he decides to go and kill her and her children. But guess what? Not only does that loser fail miserably in doing that, but Hollyleaf also takes him out. Unfortunately, Ashur somehow gets let into cat-heaven. However, this lapse in Starclan's judgement leads to Ashfur being able to magically force all the dead cats in both the Dark Forest and Starclan to do his bidding. He also possesses Bramblestar. But you know what happens to him afterwards? HIS GHOST GETS DROWNED IN A POOL OF WATER THAT SAPS THE LIFE FORCE OUT OF THE CATS THAT GO IN IT. YOU KNOW. LIKE A FREAKING LITWICK (shout out to Bristlefrost for being the one to take out this poser).

Part 3 - It's Not All Perfect Now, anyone who's read Warrior Cats knows that the series has some... interesting flaws in its writing. From forbidden romance being the Special of the Day every series to established lore being retconned at the drop of a hat, the Warriors books have gone through their fair share of bad writing decisions. Here's how I think Axl would respond to some of those issues:

1. Continuity Errors: - "Redtail's Debt" has dubious canonicity. It was established in the second book of the first arc that Redtail, the first deputy of Thunderclan talked about in the series, did NOT kill Oakheart (a former deputy of Riverclan) in a battle that took place in the first book's prologue. Whether or not he did was a huge part of the intrigue of the first two books, and finding out he didn't was an important part of uncovering Tigerstar I's treachery. The writers who took over after Holmes retired from the series retconning this has horrible implications for the series timeline. (And it makes Ravenpaw (one of the most iconic characters, and the one who revealed that Redtail wasn't a murderer) look like a liar for no reason. And we can't have that.) As a result, I think Axl would be pretty upset about this one. I feel he'd take the lore for these angry kitty-cats super seriously. He probably has a mock timeline in his room on the wall. He takes notes whenever new bits of worldbuilding is introduced. He represses the urge to bang his head against a wall whenever the writers confuse a cat's lore with another (looking at you, Graystripe). He knows everything about these cats, and he knows that Redtail didn't kill Oakheart. - On that note, the Heavystep situation would drive him up a wall. For those of you don't know, Heavystep is a character who has died a grand total of three times in the Warriors series. But he was never leader or anything like that: no, the authors just kept losing track of him. But you know who didn't lose track? The readers. I like to think Axl has an original copy of the book Dark River. In the original print of that book, Heavystep was brought back to life for a fourth time. This was later fixed in a reprint, but Axl doesn't know that. 2. Forbidden Romance: Until recently, cats who belonged to different clans were not allowed to become mates. But due to some changes in the Warrior Code, that is less of a problem. However, that doesn't change the fact that we got a lot of forbidden relationships in the series before that point. But even with that in mind, I think Axl would actually eat this sort of plotline up. He'd love it. We've already established that he would enjoy the more violent aspects of the drama. So why not the drama that takes place between characters in non-violent ways? - I figure that Axl would enjoy it until the last book of Omen of the Stars (AKA The Last Hope). That's when he starts punching the air out of frustration. I can totally see him venting about it out loud to anybody who will listen:

Axl: "And then Dovewing chooses freaking BUMBLESTRIPE over Tigerheart, even though Bumblestripe tried to ask her out DURING A FUNERAL." Zero: "And then what happ--" Axl: "Dude, I haven't even told you the worst of it. Before all that, Jayfeather was catching feelings for someone from the freaking PAST because TIME TRAVEL. And - oh. OH. Let me tell you about Firestar and Spottedleaf. Guess what they do. While everyone around them is dying and fighting for their lives. Guess." Zero: "Firestar.... moves on from her?" Axl: "HA! I WISH. No. Instead, they have an entire MOMENT. IN FRONT OF SANDSTORM. I HATE IT HERE." - As you can tell, Axl wouldn't exactly be supportive of the whole "Spottedleaf x Firestar" debacle (Spottedleaf dies in the first arc after Firepaw develops a one-sided crush on her. Spottedleaf starts to reciprocate as a ghost (after Firepaw becomes an adult and is named Fireheart), only for this to continue... until the day Spottedleaf's ghost dies). I imagine Axl would be fine with it at first, but once Firestar becomes mates with Sandstorm? All bets are off. I just can't see Axl supporting Firestar emotionally cheating on his wife. Axl would appreciate a lot of things - adultery most likely wouldn't be one of them. - Omen of the Stars would probably leave a bitter taste in Axl's mouth as far as forbidden romance goes (even after Dovewing ends up getting together with Tigerstar II) until The Broken Code, which would end up redeeming the concept in his mind in the most dramatic way possible:

Axl: *Is crying* X: "Aw, Axl! What's wrong?" Axl: *Is holding book 5 of The Broken Code, weeping miserably* "Bristlefrost and Rootspring just w-wanted to be h-happy, but now they can't, because -- because Bristlefrost is dead!" X: *Has no idea what he's talking about, is trying his best* "Oh, no! That's... that's awful." Axl: "And now all Rootspring has left of her is a vision of her and him with - with the kids that they'll n-never get to have-!" *Sobs* X: "Okay... how about... how about you read something a little happier-" Axl: "No, that - that's okay. I wanna finish it." X: "Are... are you sure?" Axl: *More serious than he has ever been in his life* "Yes." X: *Puts hands up* "Well - okay, then!"

Part 4 - Conclusion So. To sum this up, Warriors is a book series that contains copious amounts of violence, underdog characters to root for and relate to, killable villains, romance, and things that people can complain about. And Axl is someone who would enjoy all of that. In other words:

Rest in peace, Axl. You would've loved Warrior Cats. ...

(Yes, I know he's technically not dead. But he may as well be since we never got X9. The writers of the ZX series didn't even know what his final fate was supposed to be. That's why we got Albert and not Axl. Seriously. Look it up.)

Part 5 - Additional Notes Here are some other things that I would like to say that wouldn't fit into the whole of the essay:

- This took way longer than expected: it was in my drafts since August 10th! I actually had to edit a certain part of the essay because the arc A Starless Clan concluded while I was writing this. But now it's free. And I am now able to start work on another essay meant to boggle hearts and minds. Get ready. - Axl's favorite villain would be Tigerstar, even though he reminds him of Sigma. Reading about him getting killed twice gave him deja vu. - Zero would read Warriors to get a feel for it, so that he could understand whenever Axl started ranting about it. He ends up losing the plot and has to resort to watching YouTube videos. - X, on the other hand, would get super invested - but only after Axl started reading A Starless Clan. Which means that he's got a long way to go before he can relate to Axl's cat-related tangents. - Signas tried to read Warriors because Axl brought it up during a meeting once. He confused it for Tailchaser's Song (1985) and ended up introducing Axl to a new book to get excited over instead of figuring out what's "hip with the kids." - Axl cried at the end of The Last Hope. He bawled his eyes out. Just completely inconsolable. And then he read Dovewing's Silence, and cried some more. - When Grey Wing said "Kill me. Kill me and live with the memory. Then tell the stars that you won.", it formed an entire core memory in Axl's brain. He would totally say this at some point in the fight against Red. And Red would just laugh and recall when Axl lived with Red Alert and spent a bunch of his free time reading silly cat books. The tension is eased. And then Zero runs over with his sword while screaming a battle cry and then they remember that they're at war. - Now for the serious parts. To begin with, there is a certain novella in the series known as Spottedleaf's Heart. Long story short, I don't like the idea of Axl reading this book. I don't like the idea of an actual child reading this book (at least, not without guidance). So Axl will not be reading it. I do not feel like it would be appropriate for me to explain why here, since it involves topics that would be hard to discuss in what's supposed to be a lighthearted essay. However, Moonkitti has a video that explains the issues with this book in case you want to know what it is I'm referring to (however, please heed the warning that she provides at the beginning). - For the second point, I'll cut straight to the chase: Warriors has quite a few examples of ableism and sexism. I didn't discuss either of them in-depth because I felt that it would be out of place tone-wise in the grand scheme of the essay, but again: I would be doing you a disservice if I didn't at least warn new readers about these aspects. To be specific, these problems are issues because it sometimes feels like the writers resent having disabled and female characters existing in their narrative at all. However, something that is worth mentioning is that there seems to have been efforts made over time to fix these problems. - In case you're wondering how Axl would feel about all this, here's how I see it: he'd hate it. While there aren't any disabled characters in the MMX series that he could've interacted with, Axl does know what it's like to be underestimated and mistreated for reasons outside of one's control. So he would most likely be personally upset by how the narrative takes the chance to sideline or get rid of characters in a similar position, regardless of whether or not the reason why was because of a disability (I imagine he would have some very strong words to say about what happened to Snowkit). As for the sexism: as far as I'm aware, most of the female influences in Axl's life are positive, with him knowing all of them personally. Why wouldn't he get mad about how the series treats women? Especially when all of the ones that he's friends with have been directly involved in what he does as a Hunter, or in saving the world in the case of MMX Command Mission?

Additionally, the books sometimes have legitimate trouble properly writing abusers. Some are written in genuine, believable ways, while others are written that way by accident or aren't fully treated the way they should be by the narrative. This leads to some... odd implications as to what is considered abuse in Warrior Cats and by the authors. In light of that last sentiment: do not come after any of the authors. While you don't have to respect all of their writing decisions, that doesn't mean you can just run around attacking people. Be respectful.

Furthermore, Warriors also includes relationships between characters with lengthy (and sometimes problematic (which is a topic that warrants it's own discussion, although I am not sure if I should be the one to discuss it)) age gaps. Keep that in mind before you start reading. - TL;DR: read the books at your own risk. And be mindful of what you're getting into.

[scorpionyx9621]

You know. Dead Space but particularly Isaac Clarke becomes a much more tragic character when you realize with the span of like 6 months time Isaac has a loving girlfriend whom he convinces to serve aboard a favorite spaceship of his, has his father who has been absent for basically the entirety of his life finally decide to retire and come back to Earth. Plus his mother, who has gone through multiple psychotic episodes of falling head first into a religious cult and spending all of hers and Isaac's money trying to gain acclaim in said religious cult.

Right when Isaac thinks his life is on an upswing he loses everything. His mother has another mental breakdown and kills Isaac's father and then herself. The dream ship Isaac convinced Nicole to serve aboard ends up getting co-opted by the same religious cult that drove Isaac's mom mad and unleashed an actual apocalypse on board. Isaac blames his girlfriend for the death of his parents (in a heat of the moment thing frankly) Isaac watches the last transmission sent from Nicole and watches as she kills herself to avoid being turned into an infected monster.

He then, as what I can only assume as an extreme trauma response, forcibly forgets watching his girlfriend end her own life and goes through actual turbo ultra extreme radical mega hell aboard a necromorph infected spaceship the size of a city and sees horrors truly biblical in proportion, and becomes an unwitting victim to the effects of an alien artifact created by an actual eldritch abomination as a means of reproduction and it's means of controlling and assimilating a whole planet and becomes imbued with it's essence. Driving him actually insane and making him a rambling incoherent mess drifting off into deep space.

Isaac then gets discovered and forcefully taken hostage by the government and for three years is given memory suppressant drugs and is forced to rebuild the same eldritch death tool over again. And when Isaac finally regains consciousness it's right in the middle of ANOTHER necromorph infection apocalypse event and Isaac must once again trek through actual real life turbo mega hell and has to save not only himself but other people while constantly being taunted and harassed by the eldritch marker taking the form of his ex Girlfriend and using literally every trick in the toxic lover handbook to ensure Isaac's second outing in the extremely bad place has just enough self-hatred and depression spice.

Oh and while this took place well over three years, Isaac was only lucid for about a little over 6 months of that so I'm not surprised this man is literally the most explicit example of damaged goods in all of fiction. And I love Isaac so much because of it

[lemonmaid]

hey champ, could you do a omega male reader royal AU with any of the SnK men? Erwin, Levi, Eren, Reiner, Armin, Jean - anyone. Pardon for bothering.

Hey! I couldn't pick either of them, the possibilities are endless so I just did them all and picked out more scenarios. This is more than what you asked but still. I hope you enjoy!

Dragon Erwin

Apex Alpha x Omega

Imagine you're a prince on an adventure, why? To prove to your family that you are ready to take the throne. On your way, you find a small village in desperate help; they tell you a tale or an old prophecy of a hero coming and over-throwing a dragon and ending its reign of terror, well there's a slight problem...

"There is a dragon I say! We've seen it with our own eyes!"

(Name) nodded their head, 'okay lady, as if dragons haven't been extinct for hundreds of years' "Ma'am I would really love to help, but I see no dragon here nor any issues".

The old woman got red in the face, "Do you see any crops? Do you see the once gushing waterfall? No?! That's because a dragon has made our home their home! The land is cursed!!".

(Name) did look around the town, it was very dry, but that could be from numerous things, like maybe to the new build damn that kingdom had sent out a noticed to all the near by towns.

"What kind of hero are you? Do you doubt the people in need?". The crowd around the two agreed, bickering.

(Name) sighed, "Okay, I'll look for the dragon". Not wanting to tarnish his barely known reputation.

The town cheered.

"So where is this dragon?".

'Of course it had to be an abandoned castle with lava. Noooo it couldn't be a cave in a mountain or a crater in a field'.

(Name) carefully walked acrossed an old bridge, "for my honor, for my family, for the town filled with delusional citizens" he repeated.

The castle was barren, nothing but old family crest that used to mean something to someone, an old throne room, and skeletor remains.

'Wait... human remains?'. (Name) quickly pulled out their sword.

"So after 500 years of war, this is what they sent me? An omega?"

"You!- how can you smell my scent?! Show yourself!"

The voiced groaned, "I rather not, I was sleeping comfortably until you showed up. Can't a man get a few hundred years of sleep?".

(Name) gulped, slowly walking towards the voice. "Well I wouldn't call you a man...beast? Maybe, but you are far from a man".

The voiced sighed, "I do supposed you are correct".

"So are these bodies from your cause?"

"No. They were like this when I got here. Probably another useless war from you humans. They say we dragons are the greedy ones, when really all you humans take and take".

(Name) was getting nervous, it was dark, there was no light sources besides the red glow of lava that came from outside.

"Boo".

(Name) screamed, turning himself around, pointing his sworded at a tall blonde hair man.

"YOURE A MAN?"

The man smiled, moving the sword away from his face. "Of course, we "beast" can shaped shift".

(Name) just stared at the man confused.

"Would you like to join me for some tea?"

"How the hell do you have tea?"

"Am hundreds of years old, I have tea from all around the world and tea from dead societies. I also have a good friend who brings me some regularly".

The blond man started walking away from (Name), "Wait! What about that prophecy?!"

The man chuckled, "you fell for that scam? I almost feel bad now. Your stuff is probably already stolen if you did leave stuff".

(Name)'s face fell.

"Aww don't cry now mega, now come and join me and we can chat".

Guard Levi

Omega x Omega

Your parents thought that you needed a gaurd, so who do they choose? The best of the best.

Levi came from a family-long line of assassins. When (Name) was born, Levi only five was sworn under oath to protect the young heir.

When (name) started walking, he always held hands with Levi.

If Levi was training, (Name) was always close by watching.

Can't fine the young prince? Check the training grounds, he was probably watching the young knight.

"I want you to train me on how to be a knight!"

Levi looked dumbfounded, "not a chance".

"Eh! Why not!"

"One, you're an omega"

"Well you are an omega too!"

"Yeah, but I'm not an omegan prince. They can afford to lose me"

(Name) frowned, "don't say that...".

Levi sighed, "I won't train you how to be a knight"

"But, I will train you on how to use a sword".

(Name)'s face brightened.

As (Name) trained they were covered in bruises and their bones ache.

"Your form is off, again... which is why I can just stab you, right here".

(Name) felt the pointed edge behind their knee, sweat dripped down his forehead. "You know".

(Name) took a breath, "maybe go a little easy on me? Kinda never held a sword before" he chuckled.

"You can ask the next assassin to go easy on you when I am not around".

"Please, you aren't leaving soon, you're not dying of old age yet are you?" (Name) laughed.

Levi sighed and paused, "(Name)...they want me on the front lines of an upcoming attack on the south".

(Name)'s heart dropped, "you're kidding".

"Can't say I am".

Prince Eren

Alpha x Omega

An arranged marriage between two kingdoms that have been at war for centuries. You and Eren have been meeting/courting since you two were able to speak. As children, you two never understood why you were always around each other every holiday or summer break, but you two were best friends for the time being. Then Eren grew into being the rebellious teen, he always dismissed you or even flat out ignore your presence.

"Why do I have to be damsel again! Why can't you!?" Young (Name) whined.

"Because you're a snot nosed omega cub!"

"Am Not!"

"Are too! That's why my dad said we are going to be married when we are older" Young Eren scoffed.

"I haven't even shown any signs of being an omega! So how did they know I won't be an alpha and you an omega?!"

"Because all first borns in my family are alphas! Right Mikasa?".

(Name) looked over at Mikasa who just nodded their head.

"Whatever, I don't want to play this game anymore".

♡

"You are just a late bloomer that's all, it just takes time for some pups to show their second gender". The (L/N)'s royal physician tried to reassure the family of (Name)'s gender. (Name) was already 12 and hadn't reach their growth spert or shown any signs of a scent change.

"Young Master, Master Eren is here for his visit".

(Name) and Eren sat in a field together, watching the citzizens below the hill carry out their day. (Name)'s face scrunched up, "You smell different".

"I am an alpha". Eren's face softened.

"Oh.."

(Name)'s face fell, pouting.

Eren smiled down at them and pat their head, "It's fine, you still have time".

After a few years of being separated, the two changed. (Name) stayed the same while Eren and his family went under scandal after it being proven that Eren wasn't heir to the thrown but his bastarded older brother. To "celebrate" missing birthdays Eren's mother threw a party for her step son.

"Oh you actually came"

"Well... yeah I was invited by your parents..."

Eren tch, "Even though you are a disgrace to your family?"

"Excuse me?"

"You don't even have a second gender, you are disgrace to your family and kingdom, can you even run a kingdom when your body is messed up? Can you even make decision when your body cant".

"You know what Eren, I was invited by your mom to see what is wrong with you or even to cheer you up with all this teenage edge you got going on, but fuck you. I feel bad for Mikasa who does nothing but listen to your nonsense".

"(NAME)!"

"Don't walk away from me (Name)!".

After a few more years, Eren's family was assassinated by his brother and his brother's army. Eren and his army have been taking over what little kingdom they controlled, making alliances with enemy kingdoms, and the use of dark magic.

"..Eren what have you done?"

"I did what an a king does. I protect my kingdom and my family. They started this when they killed my parents and made me king. I understood my place... it's time you did the same, omega".

Assassin Reiner

Alpha x Omega

As the only sole heir to a dying throne, you were the miracle of the kingdom. Due to being a precious miracle, you were kept up in the castle your whole life. Every family has enemies, you just happened to be the next target.

Reiner was undercover as a gardener, his next target Prince (Name), why? Because (L/N)'s kingdom was a dying one and Reiner's king thought might aswell take the family out while they are weak.

But every attempt to kill the omegan heir made Reiners heartstrings pull, maybe it was something in his DNA or how he was raised to treat omegas.

"Reiner! Look!". (Name) came running from inside the castle holding papers.

"I got a perfect marks on my lesson because of yout help in autonomy!". (Name) smiled so brightly .

"Thats... great". Reiner once again clenching the knife in his pocket.

"My teacher said that it was amazing because there wasn't even books about some of the things that you taught me! Where did you learn about vocal cords and that stuff about stomachs?".

Reiner started to sweat,"Oh... my mother was a doctor....".

(Name) looked puzzled, "huh, I guess where you are from it's okay to do autopsies then? Because I think the church would have our heads for that! Haha!".

"Right....."

(Name) looked down at the bed beside Reiner, "What flowers are you putting in today?".

"Oh... just some flowers that will grow in the winter and some that will grow in the summer"

"What kind?"

Reiner smiled softy, "marigolds and dry white roses".

Reiner needed to be careful more, for himself and for (Name).

Mage Armin

Beta x Omega

Armin was a young mage, or even a mage in training. In this world magic is very limited and only few people are born with the ability to use and read ancient texts. So when Armin is hired by a royal family to cure their only son from a curse that was placed on you as a baby. What is that curse? No one knows, not even the royal physician could see what's wrong with you. Is it paranoia or a real curse.

Armin was chanting the third scripture of the day, the intense was burning, salt around the windows, every precaution measure was taken.

As the meditation ended, the two sat in silence.

Armin coughed, "so do you feel any different?"

(Name) sighed, "nope".

Armin grabbed his checkboard, "so you are definitely not possession, so that takes that off the list".

(Name) just hummed while they stared at the ceiling.

"I can't find anything, even looking at your medical records, no diseases or counts of plague".

"That's not surprising. I'm pretty sure that my dam just imagined an old woman talking to me in the middle of the night. I mean what does no sleep do to a person".

"Hmmm, that could be a possibility but it is good to find out for sure".

"Well, it's been like this since that day and so far we've found nothing so far".

"Oh that reminds me". Armin went through his magic endless bag.

"Happy birthday (name)".

(Name) smiled fondly at the small present, "what is it?".

Armin smiled and took a seat next to (Name), "go ahead. Open it".

As (Name) opened the little box, he looked inside, "A necklace?".

"It's a special necklace, watch".

Armin took the necklace out of (Name)'s hands, putting on the bed. With a wave of his hand, the amulet glowed, then showing a map of the world.

"Woah! Is this where we live?".

Armin chuckled, "Yeah and here's where I am from".

(Name) looked fondly at the small holographic map.

"Once we figure out your curse, I wanna show you the world. You don't need to stay in this tower all the time, if you are going to be king, you need to see all the cultures and the world!".

Bounty Hunter Jean

Alpha x Omega

"GOD DAMN IT, I SAID GET OUT!".

(Name) was the only mage in his kingdom, he was also apparently the only one the King was willing to hire, sending a Bounty Hunter to bother him until he was confined.

CRASH

Another bottle of enchantment was gone, broken in front of a tree where many others lied. Jean huffed, "this would just be easier if you would come with me".

(Name) grabbed their broom and walked over. "I can't leave! I've got a farm of plants and chickens to take care of!"

Speaking of chickens, a flock came up right behind the man, following his every move.

"Are you going to take care of them?". (Name) glared at Jean, pointing his broom into Jean's chest.

Jean put his hands up in the air, "Listen, I'm only here-".

(Name) rolled his eyes,"To take me to see the King because he declared an audience with me, ya ya, I heard you all morning. Is that all?".

"Yeah?".

"Good". (Name) started to whisper.

"Wait!-"

Jean was blowned back to the beginning of the woods.

"FUCKING WITCHES!".

Sorry this took so long 'champ' anon! I really couldn't pick so I said fuck it and did them all! If anyone or the situations interest you go ahead and I'll write a couple out! Thank you so much for the request!. Also some of the people fo have shorter lengths because I was stumped on some, sorry if it looked more lazy! I will try my best next time!.

Yes, for many of you wondering I am still working on Isseki back into Twisted Wonderland, I just have extreme writes block if that one.

[safety-writes-noms]

Ohohohhoho now that you bring it up, I can definitely see Mark just. Agonizing over the fact that he wants to eat people every now and then. Hmmm how would you think his first time nomming someone would go?

he would be half convinced he's a psychopath or something. like... who thinks about eating their loved ones?? swallowing them whole too like omg?? clearly someone who's not sane. the impulses have gotten worse and worse as he's grown through the years and now it feels like a constant thorn in his side. that never ending hunger burning through his body that no amount of food can possibly sate. it doesn't even want food -- just people and that's gonna freak him out soooo bad.

obviously he can’t really talk about it to anyone just in case they think he’s utterly batshit insane so he’s slowly winding himself up while the urges keep getting more and more intense. He figures that it’s a viltrumite thing since eating people alive is very very very frowned upon in human culture. So, when he sees his dad again (with the ep where they find that Nolan’s banged a bug and made another kid) it’s one of the first things he asks about before they get the snot beaten out of them by the other viltrumites. His dad’s answer? Nolan has no idea what Mark is talking about whatsoever.

so its a mark thing. Alright. Cool. Awesome. Totally won’t send him into an emotional crisis spiral but whatever. He gets home. Hands off his new little brother to his mom and flies off to clear his head.

he runs into a crazy dude while patrolling. the guy's clearly off his goddamn rocker with a massive futurized looking gun. Mark pulls himself together before going down there before this dude can shoot anyone. does the quip thing, the whole schtick.

In the process however, he gets hit and finds himself way bigger than he's supposed to be. Nabbing the criminal is a cynch -- or its supposed to be, at least. The place s mostly evacuated by now, courtesy of Cecil and his crew and its good thing too because buildings are crumbling and now Mark is grappling with a mega sized lunatic who decided that it'd be a spectacular decision to also make himself gigantic. go figure.

he's sent flying into a building, dust flying every where as bricks collapse into a broken heap, leaving only the shell of walls left. he glances to his side groggily, registering a tiny trembling form of some poor guy who didn't have the time to get out of there, taking shelter as giants clashed outside.

there's adrenaline pulsing through mark's veins, he almost freaking squished this dude and he needs to get them out of here before that raving mad man outside comes in to beat on him some more which would undoubtedly result in this civilians death -- and shit, he's has no idea how the hell he's going to get out of here with no lives lost.

and he is just so hungry.

he barely even thinks before he's moving, gently scooping up the person and popping them into his maw. It feels weird at first, a whole living, wriggling, breathing human just… there. In his mouth. Wild. His subconscious reacts before he does, throat moving to automatically swallow in one fluid motion, and just like that, he’s done with it.

mark doesn’t actually get a whole lot of time to process anything before he’s jumped again, trying to ignore the desperate squirming nestled in his body and the rush of dopamine flooding his brain. Sure it’s not exactly what his urges want, considering they’d rather have someone close to them and not some rando but for now, they’re satisfied that they’ve been partially appeased and just focus on keeping the little human warm and safe.

The bliss of not feeling too much of that aching, burning hunger has him practically floating, and he finally finishes off the lunatic, knocking the guy out with one massive punch.

Now that mark’s been left alone (partially, sonce theres still an unconsious crazy laying in the rubble) he finds that in the absence of adrenaline is the slow rising horror of the realization that yes he actually freaking ate someone, and yes they’re still inside of him. It wars with the tidal wave of dopamine currently still juicing up his brain and eventually wins out.

Mark stumbles to his feet, cupping a hand to his mouth and heaving desperately, muscles contracting as his body fights against him until he manages to bring the poor human back up who, thankfully is just shaken and a bit confused.

Cecil's team comes in then, uses the gun to reverse their sizes back to normal (huh all they had to do was flip the batteries sweet) grabs the crazy and the dude mark ate to 1) apprehend and 2) wipe the memories of the guy. they tell Mark that Cecil wants to talk to him later, and promptly disappear.

mark is left alone with horror sinking in his chest and a slow pit growing in his stomach all over again.

this isn't an actual story or anything I js wanted to make a scenario where he ate someone so :3

[perspectivestarters]

Perspective's Sentence Starters; The Rise and Fall of a Midwest Princess by Chappell Roan (Part I)

FEMININOMENON

Same old story, time again.

Got so close but then you lost it.

Should've listened to your friends.

You sent him pictures and playlists and phone sex.

Let's get coffee.

Let's meet up.

I'm so sick of online love.

I don't understand, why can't any man...

Can you play a song with a fucking beat?

Make a bitch go on and on.

It's a femininomenon.

So, let's say it's working out.

You pretend to love his mother.

He's such a goddamn good lover.

Got what you wanted, so stop feeling sorry.

You know what I mean.

You know what you need.

But does it happen?

RED WINE SUPERNOVA

She was a playboy.

She showed me things I didn't know.

She did it right there out on the deck.

I'm in the hallway waitin' for ya.

I just want you to make a move.

Slow down, sit down.

I just wanna get to know ya.

Guess I didn't quite think it through.

Fell in love with the thought of you.

Baby, why don't you come over?

Let's pick it up now.

I don't care that you're a stoner.

I like what you like.

It's my type.

Want me to fuck you?

I will 'cause I really want to.

I've got a California king.

Okay, maybe it's a twin bed.

Don't worry, we're cool.

I heard you like magic.

I've got a wand and a rabbit.

Let's get freaky.

AFTER MIDNIGHT

Nothing good happens when it's late and you're dancing alone.

It's not attractive wearing that dress and red lipstick.

This is what I wanted.

This is what I like.

I've been a good girl for a long time.

I like flirting.

Can't be a good girl even if I tried.

I'm feeling kinda freaky.

Maybe it's the club lights.

I kinda wanna kiss your girlfriend if you don't mind.

I love a little drama.

Everything good happens after midnight.

Maybe it's the moonlight.

Let's watch the sunrise.

I really want your hands on my body.

That’s my type of fun.

That's my kind of party.

Baby, put your hands up.

Be a freak in the club.

COFFEE

Can't meet you for dinner.

It's where I met your family.

Some words were exchanged.

We know where that leads.

I'll meet you for coffee.

I know that's a lie.

If I didn't love you, it would be fine.

Nowhere else is safe.

Every place leads back to your place.

He said let's do the park.

God forbid it gets dark.

I'd rather feel something than nothing at all.

We've done this before.

I don't need it anymore.

Let's not do coffee.

Let's not even try.

It's better we leave it.

It's never just coffee.

CASUAL

My friends call me a loser.

I'm still hanging around.

I've heard so many rumors.

I'm just a girl that you bang on your couch.

I thought you thought of me better.

We're not together.

Baby, no attachment.

Is it casual now?

I know what you tell your friends.

Get me off again.

I love being stupid.

Dream of us in a year.

Maybe we'd have an apartment.

It's hard being casual.

I try to be the chill girl that holds her tongue and gives you space.

I try to be the chill girl but honestly, I'm not.

You wonder why I'm bitter?

I get off when you hit it.

I hate to tell the truth.

I'm sorry dude you didn't.

I hate that I let this drag on so long.

I hate myself.

You can go to hell.

SUPER GRAPHIC ULTRA MODERN GIRL

Never waste a Friday night on a first date.

But there I was, In my heels with my hair straight.

This man wouldn't dance.

He didn't ask a single question.

He was wearing these fugly jeans.

It doesn't matter though.

He doesn't have what it takes to be with a girl like me.

I know what I want

I'm through with all these hyper mega bummer boys like you.

I need a super graphic ultra modern girl like me.

Look at her moving.

She's the one

Oh yeah, I need a super graphic ultra modern girl like me

Get up off your feet.

Get up on that bar.

Flash the camera.

You're a star.

HOT TO GO!

I could be the one.

It's all in my head.

I don't want the world.

Who can blame a girl?

Call me hot, not pretty

Baby, do you like this beat?

I made it so you'd dance with me.

You can take me hot to go.

I try not to care but it hurts my feelings.

You don't have to stare, comе here, get with it.

No one's touched me there in a damn hot minute.

I made it so you'd sleep with me.

What's it take to get your number?

What's it take to bring you home?

Hurry up, it's time for supper.

Order up, I'm hot to go.

Hurry up, it's getting cold.

Whew, it's hot in here.

Is anyone else hot?

You coming home with me?

I'll call the cab.