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celiastjamesoscar · 1 year ago

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To Be Alone

Pairings: Wednesday Addams x fem!reader

Summary: Being alone was something special to Wednesday, but being alone with you was sacred. And she refused to share you with anyone else, even if that meant owning up to her feelings

A/N: this is part 1 of a series. If you would like to be included in the Taglist for it, let me know!

Warnings: slight friends with benefits, jealous Wednesday, snarky Reader

Word Count: 2.7K

My Masterlist

The sound of obnoxiously loud music rang throughout the room as the students of Nevermore danced in sporadic movements, and none matched the rhythm of the music. Crowds were never a fan of Wednesday’s, but she would put up with the brightest colors and loudest thumping of music to get a glimpse of you.

It was out of character for Wednesday to want anything romantic in her life, let alone with someone like you.

To put it nicely, you were just like Wednesday, a snarky asshole whose mouth sometimes got you in trouble. But you were also more friendly than Wednesday could ever be; you cared for others deeply, while Wednesday barely superficially cared for them. But when your warm, soft lips met Wednesday’s cold, stiff ones in the darkness of the woods on the coldest of winter nights, Wednesday felt her heart reach a warmth it had never known.

Your relationship with the Addams girl was a weird one, and you never expected her to be someone who would enjoy a friends-with-benefits situation. But when Wednesday called you at an ungodly hour and asked, no, told you that you were going to be her romantic partner for dinner with her family, you didn’t refuse her.

Wednesday prepped you on the car ride to dinner and told you everything you would need to say; you and Wednesday met through fencing class and soon became friends after Wednesday bested you in a duel. That information was vital to the story, according to Wednesday. You two only started to date after a romantic walk through the local graveyard, and you shared a kiss on the tombstone of the late Marilyn Thornhill.

The dinner was a peaceful one, with all things considered. You won the approval of Gomez Addams, and you seemed even to impress Grandmama. Morticia adored you, but she saw right through her daughter’s scheme of forcing you into a fake relationship with her. Of course, she would never tell Wednesday that she knew her daughter was lying to her about her relationship. Still, Morticia enjoyed watching her daughter pretend to understand the beauty and pain that is love. And Morticia knew that after enough time, Wednesday would slowly start to realize she had feelings for you.

After that dinner, you kissed Wednesday’s lips for the first time, entirely by accident. You had leaned in to kiss her on the cheek, but your sudden movement had startled the shorter girl, causing her to turn her head quickly, and when she did, her lips brushed yours. Instead of pulling back, Wednesday leaned deeper into the kiss and soon gripped your neck, trying to pull you impossibly closer as her lips connected with yours. She soon became addicted to them, and she refused to let anyone else taste them, and she soon started up an agreement with you; no feelings were involved, just late-night stolen kisses and moonlit strolls through the woods. But now, as she watched you talk with other women who weren’t her, she felt her chest tighten with anger.

“Wednesday, what are you doing?” Enid asked as she suddenly appeared beside the girl, startling Wednesday out of her thoughts. Enid had a suspicion of the goth girl’s interest in you, even though Wednesday refused to acknowledge it.

“Staring at Y/N with my autistic eyes,” Wednesday deadpanned, and the ravenette’s statement took aback Enid. “Um, okayyy,” Enid awkwardly replied as she gently placed her hands on Wednesday’s shoulders, slowly turning the girl, “I don’t know what to do with that information, but let’s go over here, where you can’t stare at Y/N.”

Truth be told, you weren’t doing anything to provoke jealousy in anyone, especially Wednesday. But the Addams loathed seeing you smile while talking to Yoko. Jealousy was a feeling she knew all too well, and it only happened with you. And for that, she would potentially murder you in your sleep tonight. It would be a clean murder, nearly no blood at all, but it put a frown on Wednesday’s lips; she wanted your murder to be a gory one, one that would bless her dreams of haunting images of you for the rest of her days, but the thought of drawing out your murder made Wednesday feel something she hadn’t felt in a long time: sadness.

“No,” Wednesday stated as she shook off Enid’s grip and continued watching you talk to the vampire. It was a dull dance, and you were only here to socialize and to make Wednesday jealous, which was working.

“Why are you so keen on watching Y/N talk to Yoko? They are roommates, like you and I,” Enid cheerfully replied, hoping to help ease the tension in Wednesday’s shoulders, but it only seemed to worsen. “Enid, three-fourths of this institution thinks that you and I are together romantically,” was all Wednesday said, and Enid picked up the hint.

“Point taken. So then, why don’t you go over there and talk to her? Like a normal person would do instead of staring at her like a creep,” Enid suggested, but judging by the glare her roommate gave her in return, she assumed that Wednesday hated the suggestion. “Well, if you’re going to be a loser whose only way of flirting is staring at Y/N until she notices you, then I don’t think you will have any luck at pulling her. But I wish you the best,” Enid stated as she quickly looked at you before returning her attention to Wednesday. She gave the goth a small hug-which Wednesday did not return-before skipping off to go God knows where.

It was as if Enid’s presence was stopping you from feeling Wednesday’s uncomfortable glaring, and as soon as the werewolf was gone, your eyes automatically found Wednesday’s dark ones.

You politely excused yourself from Yoko before walking over to Wednesday with a smug smile on your lips. Wednesday hated that smile on you, not because it looked terrible; it was quite the opposite. That smirk did something to her; it stirred something profound inside her, and she hated the beast you awoke in her.

“My lady,” you husked in a raspy voice as you took Wednesday’s hand in your own and bowed while placing a gentle kiss on the back of it. “What were you two talking about?” Wednesday asked, wasting no time in finding out if she was going to murder Yoko as well.

“Relax, my dove. We were just talking about ‘The Haunting of Hill House,’ nothing to worry about,” you replied softly as you stood up straight and gently caressed the more petite girl’s hand.

Wednesday scoffed at the pet name and tried to pull her hand out of your grip, but it only caused her to draw you closer. “You miss me that much?” You asked with a smirk as you placed Wednesday’s hand on your chest, and instead of pulling away, the more petite girl slowly ran her hand up your chest and stopped as she took your necklace between her polished black fingers.

It was a gift from Wednesday, of all people, and you wore it with pride like it was your last name. You never took it off, and in a way, it acted like a collar; no matter how far you strayed from Wednesday, people would look at it and automatically know who you belonged to.

The necklace itself was a golden chain that ended with a small circle. The circle had gold-colored beads with small, black dots in the middle. And in the center of that circle was a golden ‘W’ with a line attached to it, holding the W in place.

“You still wear it,” Wednesday stated as she flipped the W between her fingers, gently caressing it with her thumb.

“‘If you ever take this off, I will rain hellfire down on you and your family until the end of the earth. I will haunt you in this life and the next; you will never be able to get rid of the image of me standing over your lifeless body if you were ever to remove this necklace.’ Those were your exact words,” you recalled with a smirk as you watched Wednesday play with the necklace. “But hey, at least you think of us together in the next life.”

“No,” she simply stated, and you were going to argue back, but she pulled you down to her level by the necklace, “If you ever tell anyone I have plans with you in the next life, I will skin you alive and feed your remains to Fester.”

The laugh you gave Wednesday in response angered her beyond belief, but the sound of it infested her stomach with spiders, and if she wasn’t careful, she might even admit to caring about you. “Jokes on you, Uncle Fester is my best friend. We are basically inseparable,” you remarked as you stood back up, and Wednesday let go of the necklace.

“I hate that you are his favorite person,” Wednesday mumbled under her breath and then cleared her throat as she remembered why she needed to talk to you, “I will be needing your assistance this weekend.”

“And why’s that?” You asked with a smirk. You knew it was parent’s weekend, and Wednesday needed to keep up the act of you two being together; you just wanted to hear her admit it. “My parents are coming this weekend; you must be there to prove to them that I am capable of feeling emotions other than intense anger and homicidal thoughts,” Wednesday deadpanned as the loud music slowly turned into a softer one, a waltzing song.

You didn’t recognize the beautiful melody, but you stuck out your hand toward the smaller girl. “Can I have this dance?” You asked with a soft smile, and if it were under any other circumstance, Wednesday would have said yes. “No,” she dryly replied while slapping your hand away, “And you didn’t answer my question.”

“I didn’t know it was a question,” you stated.

“It’s not; I just like allowing you to think that you have a say in what you get to do.”

“You are a woman after my own heart, Wednesday Addams,” you joked, and Wednesday scoffed at you. “In your wildest dreams,” the goth girl stated as she walked away from you, but you followed her.

“So what will this weekend trip entail? Do I need to start flushing my teeth and putting on chapstick?” You questioned while following the smaller girl out of the ballroom. “Why do you not already floss your teeth?” Wednesday asked with an eyebrow hitched, clearly displaying her irritation that you don’t floss regularly.

“Ummm, because it’s pointless? I brush my teeth twice daily. Isn’t that enough?” You retorted with a curious look. “One day, you are going to wake up in the middle of the night, and all of your teeth will have fallen out of your brainless head. When that happens, I shall make a necklace out of them and force you to wear it as a remembrance of our conversation about flossing,” Wednesday stated as she walked toward her room. She had a weird way of showing affection toward you.

When Wednesday reached her dorm, she opened the door and tried to close it on you, but you caught it in just enough time and stepped into her room. You shut the door as you followed the ravenette toward her desk. “Okay, but seriously Wednesday. What do you want me to do when Mr. and Mrs. Addams arrive?” You questioned with a serious expression, and when Wednesday looked up at you, she missed your usual playful demeanor.

“Be normal. You’ve been around them before; why do you still ask me how you should act around them?” Wednesday questioned as she loaded paper into her typewriter. “Um, I don’t know. Maybe it’s because I hate lying to people! And your mom is hot, so that also makes me nervous,” you responded with a little bit of defensiveness. But for an unknown reason, Wednesday felt her heart slowly break at mentioning your attraction to her mother.

“Do not remind me of your infuriating attraction to my mother,” Wednesday deadpanned as she began typing, “And we aren’t lying to them, so you don’t need to worry.”

A small scoff left your lips at her comment, but then a mischievous smile overtook your lips as you found a loophole. Carefully, you leaned an elbow on Wednesday’s desk and smirked at the ravenette, who seemed ignorant of the mistake she made.

“So, we aren’t lying to them, correct?” You asked in a calm voice as your eyes examined Wednesday’s face. “Why are you making me repeat myself? You are correct; we are not lying to them. Now, will you please leave me so I can work?” The Addams coldly remarked as she shook the feeling of spiders in her stomach at your proximity. No matter how many stolen kisses you two shared, you always made her nervous and gitty, which was a feeling she both loathed and cherished all the same.

“By that logic, we aren’t lying about our fake relationship? So that means we are actually, in fact, dating?” You asked with that same smirk, and Wednesday knew she had fucked up when she looked into your eyes and only saw hope that didn’t match your playful smirk. “We are not in a romantic relationship at all. We are just two acquaintances who engage in romantic activities from time to time. Now leave,” Wednesday stated as she grew increasingly annoyed with you.

You gave the smaller girl a pathetic sigh as you pushed yourself off the desk and slowly sauntered away from her desk, but before you could get too far, Wednesday grabbed your wrist. When you turned to face her, Wednesday reached up and tightly gripped your uniform tie as she brought your lips down to hers, and you both sighed into the kiss.

It had been too long since you both found comfort in each other’s lips, and Wednesday had started to crave their delicate touch and sweet taste. And, of course, by ‘too long,’ that meant nearly a day. The kiss itself was a chaste one that displayed all of the love and affection Wednesday had for you that she could never verbally say.

Only when oxygen became a problem did you pull away from those heavenly lips. With a small huff, the ravenette rested her forehead against yours as her free hand came up and slowly stroked your jaw.

“I want to rip out your mandible and add it to my bone collection,” was what Wednesday mumbled against your lips, but the words that traveled through your ears were, ‘You mean so much to me that I want to have a piece of you with me forever,’ and you were happy with that translation.

“You have such a way with words, you know that? You really know how to make a girl feel special,” you mumbled against her lips before placing a final kiss on them and turning to leave.

“Where are you going?” Wednesday asked as she returned to reality when she didn’t feel your lips anymore and saw you walking toward the door to leave.

“You told me to leave, so that’s what I’m doing,” you replied before a slight smirk overtook your face, “Why, do you miss me already?”

“No. Just be ready by tomorrow morning so we can eat breakfast with them,” Wednesday stated as she continued her work, ignoring the feeling in her stomach at the thought of you leaving for the night. Most of the time, when her parents visited, you would stay the night in her dorm to further push the agenda that you two were a couple. Definitely not because Wednesday found it hard to sleep without you at night.

“Goodnight, Wednesday. I hope your dreams are just as evil as you are,” you joked as you opened the door, and Wednesday huffed in response as you left the room.

Unbeknownst to you, Wednesday hadn’t been working on her novel. She had been writing out all the things you make her feel, and when you had wished nightmares upon her, the final sentence that had made its one onto the page was the thing that shattered her heart the most: ‘Gods should fear the love I have for you.’

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Taglist: @elduster @silentwolfsstuff @baddiebbarbietngz @maskthedwarf @aroaceanxietylemon

#wednesday addams x reader #wednesday addams #wednesday x reader #wednsday addams #wednesday addams x female reader #jenna ortega #jenna ortega x reader #Spotify

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m1ssunderstanding · 8 months ago

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Let it Be Close-watch

Paul, sweety, it's beautiful, but it's killing the vibe.

Ringo looks like a very old, very tired lab rat whose been put through the maze a few too many times

Somehow the air-brown mostly eaten apple is very appropriate.

She looks far too sweet here to ever let John down. Yoko has very kind eyes.

I love how it makes it seem like Paul and John are calling Maxwell “the corny one” but really we know from Get Back that they're talking about a particular arrangement they were trying out for Don't Let me Down.

I swear he's saying “John” there, not “Joan” and also he said “came down upon His head” so… Oh! And Max died in the end in this version? “Sure that Max was dead” Okay. So Paul kills John and then himself. Murder suicide story. Yeah, Paul, you're doing great mentally, we can all tell.

I love how George getting electrocuted was important enough to make the cut for both films. Poor baby. “If this boy dies you're gonna cop it” from the guy who was just singing about a serial killer.

They're so silly

Yoko does not agree with me

Paul: stealing your man, sweetheart. John: oh no I'm being stolen teehee!

They're so silly

Oh wait, were those bitchy looks at George??? Because there he is. Idk could easily be him or Yoko.

this poor autistic baby trying to use words (not his language) to explain music (his language)

“Good MoOornin! Wooah!” I think I just … You know how Mike said people were booing Paul in the theater watching this? Yeah it's because they were pissed he didn't step out of the screen and onto their necks.

Oh Michael put himself in his own movie too? Huh, cool.

They are always in my heart

The way Paul says “get on the mic” to John??? I would've thrown something, that was so fucking bossy! Just his tone and his face and his angry pointing fingers. So mean. And John just goes “okaaay”. Oof.

Ringo covering his eyes like a little kid watching a scary movie during the orange sweater fight. Same, babe.

Sounds like the original lyric John's going for is something long “All I want is you. Nothing else is gonna do.” But that obviously didn't fit with the tune. I wonder if there was a particular conversation with Paul being controlling that made the “everything has got to be the way you want it to” line click in.

Oh my gosh! So George is showing I Me Mine to Ringo and Paul and he says the “I don't give a fuck it can go in musical” line before he even plays it. Not after John's making fun of him like he does in Get Back. Nagra reels experts: which one is correct??

George: it's a heavy waltz. Ringo:*claps hands angrily and punches the air to a ¾ beat. I love him, he's like the core of “Beatle humor” to me.

Woah there! Okay this is the John/Yoko pda Peter Jackson cut, I see. I wonder if there's a lot more footage of them swapping spit that might make the “oh John was just so in love” theory more reasonable.

It's extremely impressive that George just wrote this whole thing last night. You know? John and Paul have brought in all fragments from what I can tell. He's the only one to come in with a basically finished product.

LMAO and we're just going to Apple now. No reason. Nothing happened. Nothing to see. Moving on.

Ringo is so so cute pretending to hide from the cameras. Really he should've been the cute one.

Is it just me or does Paul drop the sillies and get sad when he sings “always be mine” at John? It's his regular voice, too, for a minute, if I'm not mistaken.

Silly cuties. But John's grin and little sexy tongue action happens the second time Paul sings always be mine, so…

What friendly artistic collaboration looks like when it's not psychosexual

Paul: have you played the dubs? George: yeah. Terrible. Paul: Great! Ringo: terrible. John: laughs Paul: (sarcastic) oh, so dreadful. …. John: where's my guitar? Paul: (still sarcastic) well we're just the greatest band ever. Idk I just like this dialogue. It's very them, you know?

This is adorable.

But I also love how they're already communicating with eyebrows, you know? They just bonded so fast and I find that beautiful.

And then Heather ups their game from taking turns going “chchchchch” into the mic to meowing into the mic. She looks at Paul like “okay your turn” and he sets her down lol he's thinking ‘if I meow into the mic right now after John already had a sex dream last night about me, he might actually cream his pants and we can't have that on camera’

Lol Billy just magically appeared!

Paul you're literally so annoying. You started the goofing off and now you're like “alright lads, that's enough.” Mkay.

He is unbelievably sexy and talented though so you know he does have those little things going for him. Someone write me a Paul/Billy fic please!!

Kinda crazy how they all four just slide straight from “Kansas City” to “Miss Ann” to “Lawdy Miss Claudy”. Makes me think of something they might've done in Hamburg.

I'm sorry but Paul finishes “please don't excite me baby. I'm down in misery.” And John's immediate answer is, “well you can get it if you want it, and if you want it you can get it!” And Paul ends up singing “I want it I want it I want it I want it”. Nice. Very subtle, boys. And that's before John gets kinky.

I love how Heather just forces a hug from George and then immediately runs away. What a cutie.

But really. How did anyone watching this get the idea that John hated Paul? Just confirmation bias I guess?

All the cut off conversations kill me but especially the one where John's working though Paul's anxieties. They're just in the middle of it and then cut. “two of us Sunday driving…”

Someone should do a study of whistling in their songs. I feel like it's another one of their tip offs that “hey this one is about us” Anyway I love John's whistling here. He's so good at it. I can just imagine him as some farm boy picking apples, you know?

Imagine booing this poor stay puppy though, like. What? I mean, what if Johann Weiner was wrong and John wasn't crying at the sight of him and Paul playing triumphant together on the rooftop, but at Paul playing his little heart out about their doomed love. Idk it's probably both. Let's be real, John was bawling through the whole thing.

What is George laughing at? Picture quality is garbage because evil corporations don't let you take screenshots of their content, but he looks like that one kid in your elementary school class that just dumped Cheetos all over his crushes desk and thinks he's a criminal mastermind.

Also I do appreciate all the attention given in the chosen shots to the musicianship. I bet they liked that at least if they had the heart to like anything about the movie at the time.

I'm sorry but I love how in sync Mo and Paul are. With this ducking and later the shimmying. I know it's wrong to ship Ringo’s wife with one of the Beatles she didn't sleep with, but… idk I really want her to have bedded all four at one point, you know? She deserves it, being an og.

Okay but yeah I'd be having a public meltdown if I fumbled that too holy fucking shit

Ringo feeling himself as he should

George just looks like he smells nice. Unlike the others. You know?

John has such a beautiful smile. If somebody looked at me like that I'd put him up on a giant screen behind me on my world tour after he'd been dead for forty years too.

That pleeeaaaheeeaaase though. Looking at Paul. How did he survive I'll never know.

The cut from screaming Paul to grouchy nap lady is extremely painful.

John was so cool in this concert. Like the epitome of cool.

Kevin, my love, thank you for your service

I love Yoko leaning so far and craning her neck. She's like a mom at a school talent show. Like “I only came to see my baby.” Type vibe. Which is exactly what she's doing, unlike Mo, and honestly I find both of them extremely valid

You know in movies where the romantic leads are never looking at each other at the same time?

I think I watched George and John switching back on their amps like fifty times because I just love it so much. And from this angle, you can see John's saying something to Paul about it. He looks serious and he's shaking his head. I wonder what he's saying.

Mal Evans I love you forever for this. Look at his hand on the rail, just blocking them off completely, so protective.

Them turning to each other at the end always gets me. It's automatic, like second nature, and it's the last time ever. They deserved better.

Oh Darling duet in the credits are you fucking kidding me??? Was that in the original? “Believe me, when I tell you.” “Oh I do.” That's the second time that they gave away in this footage that they know they're talking to each other in their music.

Alright, that's it, I guess. And then MLH is haunted by this experience for forty years until he makes Two of Us to purge the demons.

#paul mccartney #the beatles #john lennon #mclennon #ringo starr #george harrison #let it be

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adventuringblind · 1 year ago

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Sunrise

Oscar Piastri x Autistic!Reader

Genre: Angst

Summary: The fans and media get to Oscar’s girlfriend in a way he’ll never forgive

Warnings: SUICIDE AND SH depictions, toxic media, death threats, lack of communication, anxiety, Oscar is a mess.

Notes: …. We’re not talking about my patterns alright. I swear I’m in therapy.

Masterlist

Oscar is not normally an irrational person. He prides himself on his calm and collected state. Something that his neurodivergent counterpart loves because it makes him easy to read. Everything is clear to her with him.

He adores his girlfriend. Plans to eventually marry her one day. He doesn’t care that her body isn’t the ‘standard’ for beauty because he finds her stunning. He doesn’t care that she has deep passions for her interests and could talk for hours about it because he loves listening.

So why is it his fans don’t get that same thing? Why do the vultures have to attack her for doing nothing wrong?

He ponders these questions as he sits in the hospital waiting room. Fingers crossed he got to her in time.

She’d turned off all her notifications on social media. She had to. For some reason now that Oscar and McLaren are on track and fighting again, people are seeming to notice her more often.

Gone are the days of sneaking off into the quiet corners. Numbered are the days she’ll be able to spend with him at this rate.

The death threats started a month ago. To many things she’d rather not think about. The name calling is flat out unnecessary and something she doesn’t understand.

She knows logically nothing can come if it. But the nagging at her brain won’t stop for some reason. She hates it, being empathetic. She just feels so extremely that she can’t decipher if the words hurt her or if she’s angry and why she feels this way. It’s to much for her mind to process.

So she turns everything off. No social media for her.

She’d simply told Oscar the hate was to much and she needs a break from the internet. Which isn’t a lie, but she didn’t want him to worry about her and start doing poorly because of it.

Instead curled up underneath her blankets with music and switched off the world.

Oscar is feeling alright with fifth in Hungary. Not exactly where he wants to be, but it’s still considerably better then where he was previously.

As is routine, he gets into the garage as quickly as he can. The one thing he managed to negotiate for with his PR team: the he gets to check in on his girlfriend before he does media duties.

He peers inside. It’s mostly empty due to the incoming podium celebration. But there is no sign of her. Nothing is the garage or his driver room or Lando’s room, or the bathroom.

His heart thuds in his chest. This is routine, and she always sticks to her routine. If she’s not here then something must be terribly wrong. Oscar pulls out his phone to see he has a text from her and the weight on him lessens just a tad.

‘Sorry I won’t be there for the end of the race! I was feeling incredibly sick so I went back to the hotel room! I love you so much! 🧡🖤’

And suddenly that weight is back. If she left then something is clearly wrong. She’s stayed through blurry vision from migraines, endured hours of overstimulation for him, even dealt with his fans pushing her around. Yet she always stayed. If something caused her to leave then it’s definitely something to worry about.

He ended up missing the podium celebration. His PR manager is looking for him. But he could care less and heads straight for Zak.

He gives a brief summary of what’s going on and defines is as an emergency. That word was what made Zak let him go as long as he promised to keep everyone posted.

Then he ran.

Race weekends have come to be one of her favorite things. The consistent hum of car engines stimulates her brain in a way that she loves.

What she doesn’t love is the fans. She wonders for a moment if all the WAG’s have this kind of hate. So she sets off to go find Lily and ask. She’s become close with her over the course of this year. She’s also passionate about things and it’s fun to listen to her get excited over her interests. Something the female can relate to well.

When she neared the Williams hospitality, she saw Lily and waved her over only to be stopped in her tracks by a few fans in McLaren gear. She instantly took notices of the very blatant disregard for personal space and the negative energy they carried with them.

Then they out in some fake smiles and handed her an envelope, walking away without a word.

She was left confused and stunned. But also curious. The envelope in her hands had some weight to it and she can’t help but wonder what’s inside.

She doesn’t hesitate to open it. Her eyes scanning over the contents. Every second she looks at it makes her feel sick to her stomach.

Someone had been stalking them. Not just her and Oscar, but Lando as well. Addresses, pictures, personal information, even images from intimate moments where they are very clearly without clothes.

She could see the possibility of her and maybe Oscar being stalked if these are the same fans who have been harassing her for a couple months now. But Lando as well makes her feel dirty and upset in a way.

It’s to much. She feels to much. It’s overwhelming.

She stuffs everything back inside and finally gets to Lily. A brief excuse leaves her lips that she’s going back to the hotel cause she’s feeling sick. She takes note of Lily’s instant concern and the female does her best to fight back every emotion. It’s utterly draining. She has no energy to sort out her feelings and other peoples feelings when she can’t understand any of them anyway.

Lily lets her go on the condition she texts her when she gets back to the hotel.

She agrees. She'll be messaging everyone when she gets there.

Oscar gets into his car and fumbles around for the keys.

He left them with his stuff. His stuff that he doesn't have. Now he's going to have to run all the way back.

He gets out and heads straight to the McLaren garage. Ignoring the strange looks.

He even tries pulling his phone out to call her. Straight to voicemail. Twenty times.

Halfway there, he runs into Lando. The Brit is winded and carrying Oscar's things.

"I'm driving."

She can't believe she's actually going to do this. It's not that she's never thought about it before. Feeling alien on your own planet will do that to you. But she feels like she has no other choice.

It's too much. The fans want her dead, and they are willing to do horrible things to get it.

She can't handle it. The feelings of all of it are overwhelming. She can't tell where her emotions end and someone else's start. The letter written to her only points out further.

The last few months have been beyond her limit. She doesn't feel safe in her own skin. Everyone is telling her she'll never be enough. That she is not meant for this life.

She'd thought about her friends as she wrote those damn notes. The blank looks when she says something lnnapropriat for the conversation. The times she's had meltdowns and they had to deal with her.

She thinks about Oscar, too. His note is three pages long. It's intimate, and she hopes he can understand it. Words she's written countless times the last months to make sure he understands her decision.

She lays it out where she knows he'll see it and then locks herself in the bathroom. The bathtub is filled with ice-cold water and not filled all the way to the top. Just enough to make things easy.

Is she really doing this because those damn fans are going to leak everything about their lives tonight if she doesn't? Certainly a factor in her decision. It seems the logical solution if she's to fix the problem. She hates herself for this; that she can't just be what everyone wants.

That thought brings the first cut.

She didn't bother taking off her clothes. She hates the feeling. They cling to her skin and it makes her want to peel her skin off.

The second cut is for her clothing.

Then the third.

And a fourth.

The fifth makes her dizzy.

The sixth causes her vision to dance.

The seventh and eighth she can't even register.

Everything is numb by nine and ten.

Then nothing.

Oscar and Lando take three steps at a time.

Apparently, Lando had run into Lily and found out what had happened. The Brit also felt his stomach drop with the feeling something is wrong.

Oscar sprints down the hall when they make it to the right floor. Fumbles around with his key card. Then, finally, he gets the door open.

He scans the room. There is paper stacked neatly on the table. An envelop almost thrown to the side.

He looks at the note addressed to him, and he chokes. Lando is searching for any sign of life but the Aussie can't see past the fact that there are fans asking her to kill herself. And that she felt the need to say yes because now they have stalkers.

He'll think about it later. Right now, Lando is screaming for him.

He barrels to where the voice comes from. Again, he chokes. This time on frantic tears.

Lando is looking like he might pass out, but the Brit is staying strong for his teammate and friend. He tries to get Oscar to help him.

She may be passed out, but the Aussie registers Lando saying she has a pulse. That she's still breathing even if it's shallow.

They work together to drag her out of the water. Her make it so that when they set her down, she immediately is sliding on the tile. They wrap her arm in wash rags. The only thing they can find to slow the bleeding. But the cuts are too deep. It doesn't slow.

So they call an ambulance.

Oscar doesn't register much after that. Listening to Lando instruct him on what to do, including breathing. Riding with her to the hospital. Watching her be taken away. Meeting Lando in the waiting room.

Now he has nothing to do but wait and look through everything he missed.

Her socials are where she's being threatened, sure. But it's the contents of the envelope that got Oscar angry. Way past the point of livid.

"Lan, I- what the hell." He shows everything to his teammate, and terror stretches across his face.

And then she was left with a ticking clock and an ultimatum. Disappear or have all this and more released to the public. What better way to disappear than to do it permanently.

It breaks him. He can't breathe past the thought of not having her around. He can't live knowing she left because the world is suck a cruel place. And he feels utterly selfish for wishing her to stay with him through it.

Somehow, he ended up on the floor, sobbing dramatically into Lando's sweatshirt.

But then others start to appear. It's not just the two of them because there are so many people that care for her.

Max shows up first with a certain Monegasque in tow, followed by Alex and Lily, the latter of which looks about as broken as him. Then George and Lewis appear, followed by Logan.

They explain what happened. Everyone is shocked, and there are no words between them for a few minutes as everyone processes.

"I don't understand why someone would do this." Pipes Max. He knows about death threats fairly well, but this is a new level of extreme.

"We could say something. Make a statement about it and start a suicide awareness campaign." Lewis suggests.

Oscar knows a campaign probably won't do much against whoever sent this, but a statement might. He wants to say everything on his mind.

And that's exactly what he did. His PR team be damned because this takes precedence.

She wasn't expecting to wake up. She wasn't supposed to wake up. So how is she awake?

She cracks her eyes open just a tad to assess her surroundings. Her arm is bandaged and she's underneath some of the worst textures to come in contact with.

The thing that catches her eye is the brown locks of a specific Australian. She moves her hand to them and runs her fingers gently along his scalp.

he shifts around a bit before relaxing into the feeling. At least she could give him this before she ruins his and Lando's life.

She's not sure how long they go on like this until Oscar sits up and yawns. He blinks a few times and adjusts himself to the florescent lights.

She's not sure she's ever seen Oscar cry before. Once at a really sad movie, but even that was just slight. Now he's crying tears for her. The sound makes her tear ducts spring into action as well.

"Please, don't ever do that again." He rasps. His voice crackles with the sound of sobs.

She doesn't say anything. She can't say anything. So instead, Oscar crawls into the bed with her. He just cradles her body into his.

"I'm sorry." Is all she manages to say. And after a few more breathes she continues. "I didn't want to be the reason you and Lando lose your jobs. Or be the cause of your stress. And then everything felt like it was too much, and I just wanted it to stop." She feels pathetic.

"I promise that I will never be upset with you for something like this. The fans pushed and pushed and then drove you into a corner. But in the future, you have to come to me. I can't help if you don't communicate with me."

"What about racing? And Lando? And all your personal information?" The weight she'd had before has made a sudden return.

"Should be taken care of. We beat them to the punch and made a statement about how someone close to McLaren had been threatened and the person responsible would be posting personal information." Oscar explains. She feels better knowing they didn't say it was her name. "I also said I would be taking a break from socials for personal reasons... and also said something about how much I love you."

The news came out eventually. It's not every day that F1 driver's campaign for mental health. But they've all been incredibly helpful. She is on the road to recovery and Oscar intends on being with her through every step of the way.

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mjbarrosart · 1 year ago

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I did a little fanart of all the Fontaine characters.

I am enjoining a lot this new region in Genshin. Sumeru was fine, but was not my cup of tea. Decadent French degenerates?? that is right on my alley!

Also the music of Fontaine RULES!

I'll share my opinions about every character, so...

SPOILERS FOR 4.1

_______________________________________

Charlotte: A missed opportunity to do something amazing with her as a journalist. She could be a character that makes interesting commentary about Fontaine injustices, but nah, she is just chasing "a big headline", zero interest for the truth.

Freminet: He is cute. I like him.

Lynette: I love her. I wish the game put her more in the spotlight, right now just feels like a prop for Lyney and that is a shame.

Lyney: He is fine. His outfit always makes me laugh.

Furina: My baby girl, the bane of my existence, my favorite Archon ever. We don't accept Furina slander in this household. I see her as an overwhelmed person who needs to put this all this show in order to keep feeding the Oratrice, while everyone is just taking her as incompetent without knowing what kind of sacrifices she is doing, idk, she is a really interesting Archon to me. I love the idea of her being cursed, and her interactions with Arlecchino made me really sad, I feel bad for her, she is not having a good time...I hope her story don't disappoint me, hahaha.

Neuvilette: Old man, autistic coded dragon for the win, I really like him. He is also a little of a drama queen with all this "I don't belong here" stuff while outside literally 90% of Fontaine is a member of the "we love Neuvillette fan club"

Wriothesley: He is fine. I like his interactions with Neuvilette and him as Clorinde's friend. My problem with him is this thing that Genshin likes to do of "is not the system that is bad just you need to be sure to have good people on the top" kind of discourse that is really bad. So him as a cop/jail administrator kinda is another missed opportunity to make a little more commentary, but maybe I'm asking for too much.

Sigewinne: I really like her after the Archon quest. Haha, you can not trust her. Lol.

Navia: I love this woman with all my heart. She is the best, smart, badass and beautiful. Also incredibly gay for Clorinde, I love their drama. I want more Navia content now!

Clorinde: I am a sword lesbian, so she is right on my alley. I like her serious but not stoic attitude, and how she turns into a wet cat in front of Navia, lol. I want to learn more about her. She is cool.

#genshin impact #fontaine #furina #neuvillette #clorinde #navia #lyney #lynette #freminet #charlotte #wriothesley #sigewinne #mjbarros #fanart #genshin spoilers #I always find typos after I post my stuff argh!#Excuse my dyslexic not English native speaker person ><

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fallenrocket · 4 days ago

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Some Random Galinda/Elphaba/Fiyero Thoughts

Note: This is mostly based on the musical, looking at the movie in particular--while I love the book, Fiyero is so different between the two versions that he needs to be viewed as two separate characters. Also, my shipping thoughts go hand in hand with my neurodivergent headcanons. For the purposes of this post, we have Elphaba (autistic,) Galinda (high-masking autistic/ADHD,) and Fiyero (ADHD.)

For as long as there have been love triangles and shipper wars, there have been fans who've pointed out the obvious solution of "So-and-So has two hands!" I've certainly seen the appeal of various OT3 ships in the past, but after watching Wicked: Part 1, I'm not sure if I've ever seen a love triangle as much in need of an OT3 resolution as Galinda/Elphaba/Fiyero.

Any way you look at it, it's clear that Elphaba is the apex of this triangle/polycule, so let's start there. The Elphaba/Galinda and Elphaba/Fiyero ships are both rock solid. Both have certain similarities, the popular hottie paired with the gorgeous outcast whose beauty can only be seen by them. But the road to how they get there in each case is a little different, so we'll take them one at a time.

Elphaba/Galinda

We have to talk about them first, obviously. That's why we're all here, right? The relationship so iconic, you can build a whole marketing campaign purely off the colors green and pink. These two have a classic love/hate setup, the old I Hate My Roommate, Oh No I Love Them! routine. But with both characters, it goes so deep. Being seen as a good person is crucial to Galinda's sense of self, and from the moment she meets Elphaba, who sees through her self-aggrandizing vow to use her not-yet-developed sorcery skills to "help" her, that sense of self is challenged. The image Galinda presents to the world is so carefully controlled and precise--her popularity is thanks in part to the fact that she's constantly performing "personhood" for those around her. But Elphaba immediately sees through her performance, calling her out in front of everybody.

That, I think, is at the heart of their early conflicts. It's not just that Galinda is pretty and popular and Elphaba is green and weird. It's that Elphaba has no issue pointing out that Galinda isn't what she pretends to be, and that rattles her. At the same time, it probably burns her up that Elphaba refuses to give in to what other people think about her, at least giving the impression that she doesn't care about their opinions. That isn't true, of course, as Galinda rightly recognizes at the Ozdust Ballroom.

When Galinda steps forward to dance with Elphaba, it's a revolutionary moment for her character. It's an unspoken acknowledgment that she had been cruel in giving Elphaba the hat, willingly admitting that she's not as "good" as she likes to think she is. But at the same time, this dance is the first truly kind thing Galinda does in the story. Like Elphaba, she hasn't stopped caring what people think about her, but for the first time, doing something right means more to her than just giving the appearance of it. So she stands with Elphaba among the stares and whispers, following her lead and doing her dance regardless of how it looks.

"Popular" is more than just a recompense, a genuine way to try and help Elphaba after tricking her earlier with the hat. Even as Galinda tries to make Elphaba more like her--ultimately giving up when she realizes how lovely Elphaba already is as herself--this is Galinda at her most unmasked, which actually makes her a little more like Elphaba. She is extra as hell throughout this whole song, delightfully goofy and hyper and excited. It's in stark contrast with Elphaba, who doesn't know what to think here, but this is who Galinda is when she's not performing for everyone around her. Elphaba is always 100% herself and never lets anyone take that away from her, and in "Popular," Galinda lets Elphaba see her.

When the break happens between them in "Defying Gravity," it has nothing to do with how they feel about each other. Their angry/frustrated accusations of "I hope you're happy" give way to their sad/wistful farewells of "I hope you're happy." Their essential breakdown is about, not who they are but how they are. Elphaba doesn't know how to go along to get along, even for the sake of playing a long game, so she immediately blows everything up with the Wizard and Madame Morrible because she knows how wrong this all is. She shows her hand without a second thought and is instantly prepared to throw everything else away for her ideals. Galinda, meanwhile, has spent her life being who other people expect her to be, and she doesn't really know how to give all that up--including her dreams of becoming a sorcerer and her chance for real power and influence--to take what feels like a shortsighted stand. Elphaba has no plan beyond "I won't do this" and "We have to get out," and as much as Galinda loves her, she's not ready or able to take that leap. They're both caught on diverging paths, reaching out for each other even as they're being pulled apart. Gaaaaah!!!

Elphaba/Fiyero

Even though Elphaba/Fiyero plays with similar archetypes and some similar themes as Elphaba/Galinda, their interactions and relationship are different, which is valuable. This isn't just a case where the canon M/F ship gets to "go there" while copying the F/F ship Because Compulsive Heterosexuality. I will say, the movie in particular gives me lots of Fiyero feels that I don't necessarily have with the stage show, so my thoughts on both Elphaba/Fiyero and Galinda/Fiyero rely heavily on Jonathan Bailey's interpretation of the character. In this version of the story, Fiyero does feel important to me, not just a shoehorned-in love interest for the sake of it.

Like Galinda, Fiyero is a character who masks/performs a lot. A key difference between them, I think, is that Fiyero has much more self-awareness about his. He knows what he's doing when he plays the role of the shallow party prince, essentially "giving the people what they want." But as hard as Galinda works to maintain the image she projects, I'm not sure if she entirely realizes that it isn't the real her. Both characters are trapped behind the masks they've made, but Fiyero definitely knows it, and I'm not sure if Galinda does.

At any rate, that's what we're working with when Fiyero meets Elphaba. In this instance, he clocks her before she clocks him--Fiyero easily defies her expectations when she rattles through her standard "no, I'm not seasick" list, and he immediately treats her like a person, something that not many people in her life do.

Elphaba quite can't see that at first, though. I don't know if she initially buys the performance Fiyero sells everyone else, but she's pointedly unimpressed by it. While everybody else is tripping over themselves falling for his charms in "Dancing Through Life," Elphaba huffs and rolls her eyes, even when Fiyero specifically meets her gaze in the middle of the number and gives her a little "hey, I know you!" wave.

So even though we get a bit of a love/hate trajectory again, it's not mutual this time. Fiyero is intrigued by Elphaba from the start, though not particularly because of her greenness--rather, he finds it interesting that she's immune to his charm. He likes that she speaks her mind and causes "commotion," and post-"Popular," he tells her she doesn't need to change herself. The unspoken implication? He likes who she already is. Elphaba is the one who holds back here.

It's not clear exactly where and how the change happens for her. Obviously, the rescue of the Lion cub marks the moment where Elphaba realizes her feelings for Fiyero, voiced in "I'm Not that Girl." But her opinion--and understanding--of him had already shifted. As he points out, some part of her chooses not to knock him out with the poppy spell, recognizing him as a potential ally to help the Lion. And it's in that scene where she acknowledges that he just pretends to be shallow and self-absorbed, adding that he's unhappy within that performance. So she's already made those observations about him. But when did it happen? For me, that's the part I'm not seeing on the screen, and it's an interesting question to wonder what causes Elphaba to reevaluate Fiyero in the first place.

With both Galinda and Fiyero, I think it's important to note that loving Elphaba doesn't change who they fundamentally are. This isn't character growth via The Love of a Good Woman. Both of them already are the people Elphaba comes to know and love, but the parts of them that she values are the parts that they tend to hide. Loving Elphaba makes them want to let themselves be seen, at least by her. By the end of the movie, Fiyero's feelings about how he wants to show himself are already changing, while Galinda is torn, breaking her own heart as she's dragged back into other people's expectations.

Galinda/Fiyero

Mileage on this one varies, I know. Plenty of fans will argue that this "triangle" really only has two sides, that it's Elphaba/Galinda and Elphaba/Fiyero. That Galinda/Fiyero is purely fake performative comphet. If that's your interpretation, that's cool.

For me, though, I do think there are real feelings there, on both sides. Galinda lamenting, "I don't even think he's perfect anymore, and I still want him!" feels major for her character, and I see Fiyero's care in how gently he responds when Galinda is knocked out by the poppies. And it's just more interesting to me if they both care about each other. I'm not saying their feelings for each other are the same as what they feel for Elphaba, or as intense. But in a hypothetical OT3 resolution for this story, I think their relationship would add up to more than just passing each other coming and going from Elphaba's bedroom.

I find Galinda/Fiyero very interesting because, even though they're the only "official" couple within the triangle by the end of the movie, there's far more potential in what their relationship could be than what it actually is at this point. In an OT3 scenario, I feel like their dynamic requires the most speculation or imagination. It's very clear what Elphaba/Galinda or Elphaba/Fiyero would be like romantically. But what would Galinda/Fiyero be to each other?

The way I see it, their canon relationship is hampered by two chief points: masking and outside expectations of monogamy.

Because both of them are performing most of the time, that extends to their relationship. Fiyero and Galinda start dating because each is very much The Sort of Person I'm Supposed to Date. When they flirt with each other, it feels like you're watching a play, two master performers "yes and-ing" their way through a relationship that's far more about the image they want to present than what they themselves really want.

Again, they're both drawn to Elphaba in part because she sees them for who they are and makes them want to be who they are. Fiyero's mask makes him actively unhappy, and at minimum, Galinda's puts her under a lot of pressure to maintain it and forces her into heartwrenching choices. So as they date one another--largely because other people expect it of them, because they're "perfect together"--their relationship is tied up in this thing that brings them misery and stress.

Furthermore, they're not really dating one another, they're dating one another's masks. We know that the real Galinda and the real Fiyero are both great--Elphaba wouldn't like them if they weren't! But in in their relationship, they don't really get to see the parts of each other that Elphaba loves.

That brings me to their other main hindrance. If Galinda and Fiyero are artificially forced into monogamy, then of course it's not gonna happen for them. They're just not it. Neither of them would choose the other over Elphaba, and if only one of them can be with her, than one person's happily-ever-after is the other one's loss.

In that way, I think a real Galinda/Fiyero relationship could only be possible inside an OT3. If both of them were free to date Elphaba, free to love and be loved by her, that could give them space to love each other, in whatever form that would take. Maybe it'd be romantic, maybe not (Lesbian!Galinda truthers, I see you!)--maybe they'd both have a romantic/sexual relationship with Elphaba and be platonic partners for each other. I'm not sure. But I do think they genuinely care about each other, and I think they'd be able to figure out what that looks like for them if they were both comfortable and secure in their relationship with Elphaba. If they didn't 1) feel forced to compete for her or 2) feel that, not being with her, they were one another's "consolation prize." And since I also think being with Elphaba would help them both feel more comfortable in dropping their masks and being their authentic selves, they'd have a much better opportunities to actually get to know one another.

#fallenrocket #wicked #wicked movie #elphaba thropp #galinda upland #glinda upland #fiyero tigelaar #galinda x elphaba #glinda x elphaba #fiyero x elphaba #fiyero x glinda #fiyero x galinda

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noridoorman · 4 months ago

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My reaction to episode 8!

Shh, spoilers below!!

I loved every second of everything that was there.

Nori and Uzi's conversation at the beginning was so sweet, albeit short. Bseeing that little happy face Uzi made at seeing her mom again... Man, she's been through so much and probably already thought she might have lost everyone else. So seeing the one drone she always believed was dead alive and ready to help Uzi kick some butts... Just look at her happy face.

Uzi's little laugh when Nori gave her "parental" advice is so sweet too. In all the years of her life, she never got that from her mom until now. And she finally got her mom back. It's so sweet.

Along with the shy smile and wave Uzi did, as if she's saying "Do I look good with the necklace?" And Nori responds with the cute emoticon on the stone.

Of course, that gets cut off my N RAMMING Uzi with the spaceship and oh my god, them.

LOOK AT HOW PROUD AND HAPPY HE LOOKS!! Plus, we got to see his little fangs!

And when he admits that he was mad about Uzi trying to sacrifice herself... Like, you can clearly see it in his expression and voice, he was really hurt by what she did, but also, he's happy that she's alive.

And honestly, I can't be the only one that when she first grabbed his face, I thought she was going for a kiss lol.

BUT OF COURSE CYN HAS TO RUIN THE MOMENT

I really wanna know what they said, Uzi probably cursed a lot lol

AND OF COURSE, THAT SCENE.

My god, hearing the music, the beautiful visuals... Like, the fact that "Falling for you??" is playing here and the way they hold each other and look at each other with so much love and adoration... The scene gives me so much goosebumps.

I loved how Uzi admits that she can't read the room because that's another point for autistic Uzi!

Their soft expressions, and Uzi's tiny "yay" oh my god they stole my heart.

I honestly kinda wanna know how N managed to steal the spaceship and go past J.

AND V'S BACK, LET'S GO!!

I was almost screaming like crazy in the hotel room, I've been hoping SO SO MUCH THAT SHE WOULD COME BACL!! :D

AND SHE'S RIDING ON THE SENTINEL, LIKE HOW COOL IS THAT?!

The way she says "Working with CYN?!" WAS SO SATISFYING AND GOOOOOOD she's so angry, go beat up ur ex babe /silly

This scene made me lose my shit, it's so funny, why is Lizzy being shook like a maraca

The backstory we're getting between them too. So I guess both were aware on everything, but only V was the one that wanted to change but was too scared to.

The amount of backstory we're getting on J too here kinda breaks my heart and kinda makes me angry at her. The way she said "it tricked me too..." probably because she geniunly through Tessa would be alright and fine, just for her to be... not.

J is obviously heartbroken. But she feels like she has no other choice but to team up with the Solver, especially know that it is wearing Tessa's skin, that's the closest J can ever have something of her.

"You know there's no escape, even in death!"

That line makes me think as if J wanted to die at some point, but couldn't. There's so escape for her from the reality that Tessa is dead, because the Solver will always bring her back.

Help, she's so smooth and cute and akhjdskjhsfdakjsda

The way how teriffied he is breaks my heart

When I saw that, I was in panic.

All of his eyes are focused on Tessa.

Cause of his trauma

Man, this entire scene with V apologizing for everything and even crying... She's been through so much pain and keeping so much secrets to protect N, but the burden of everything kept on weighing on her.

And her face as she realized that he revealed himself because he wanted her to stop...

And just as Flesha was about to eat N's core, Khan saves the day with DOORS! >:D Gosh I wanna kiss him on his stupid face

Gotta love V's tiny smile at Uzi, you go bisexual

I LOVE NORI I LOVE NORI I LOVE NORI I LOVE NORI I LOVE NORI I LOVE NORI

SHES SO AMAZING AND BEAUTIFUL AND STRONG AND AWESOME AND SUPER AND HAVE I MENTIONED I LOVE NORI?? BECAUSE I TRULY LOVE HER

AND THE NIGHTMARE PLAYING FOR THE FIGHT, GOSH I NEED THE SONG NOOOOOOOW

The Solver plays soooo dirty, making Uzi believe that she accidentally killed N. Gish, her expression...

The song is so catchy my god

They're so stupid, let them get married now

MY GOD SHES SO STUPID I LOVE HER I WANT THEM TO GET MARRIED AGAIN AND KISS AND ARGHHHHH

Tumblr doesn't let me add more images at that point rip :')

I'll give a more formal opinion on a seprate post!!

#murder drones #md #uzi doorman #nori doorman #serial designation j #serial designation v

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autistichalsin · 11 months ago

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I know a lot of people find it boring how much Halsin talks about nature, and I do get it- it is repetitive. However, I also find that if you break some of his statements down into what he's implying, you end up with something a lot more interesting. (ESPECIALLY because a lot of these support the "Halsin is autistic" interpretation.)

Take, for example, Halsin talking about his place in the world, specifically relating to relationships:

Halsin: I still have hot blood in my veins. Nature gifted us our desires, and the means to act on them. But we muddied its beautiful simplicity with rules, social strictures... clothes. So, I am not bound to nature. I am unbound in nature.

Halsin: Relationship? Such terms belong to civilisation - a little unfamiliar to my lips. You know what we share is more fluid, more founded in the principles of nature.

Implications: Halsin finds society too complicated. He enjoys nature because its rules are simpler and more sensical; rather than social rules and structures that are beyond him (especially when you take into account the autistic Halsin interpretation), he feels comforted by nature, which is complex in a way that he understands.

There's also Halsin's friendship with Thaniel.

Halsin: I had a friend when I was young, long ago. He played with me in the forests where I grew up... but eventually, I realised no one else had heard of him. It was Thaniel, of course. Nature was my very first friend. I get older, but he hasn't changed a day. I knew then that I had to be more than a companion to him. I had to be a protector.

Implications: Nature, by being Halsin's first friend, has always been what Halsin is comforted by. It has been a steady and comforting presence for him, something he can rely in, in contrast to other people who are unpredictable. Nature is consistent and comforting for him.

Halsin, infamously, is not happy in the city of Baldur's Gate.

Halsin: Too much noise, too many lanterns kept burning... nature's rhythm is ignored here.

Implications: Halsin is overstimulated easily by excessive noise and other sensory inputs. Nature provides him somewhere quiet.

Halsin: I wish... I wish there was a better way. I wish everyone could see the sun, have a full belly, and know nature as a friend. There is a balance that is yet to be found.

Implications: Again, Halsin sees nature- not just Thaniel, but all of nature- as a friend. A source of comfort and companionship.

Halsin: I think on [politics and high art] also. But nothing matches the splendour of an ancient tree.

Implications: Halsin loves the beauty of the natural world as much as anything else. Rather than art or music (which he can appreciate), what he prefers is something that grew rather than being made.

Halsin: I am... less anxious to find myself in a city. So removed from nature's power - I do not know how I will fare.

Implications: Not only does Halsin prefer not to be in the city, but he is actually, to some extent, frightened of it (likely due to how overstimulating it is for him), in contrast with his feeling of being right at home in nature.

There's other things to note as well. If a Dark Urge player embraces Bhaal and then tells Halsin to bow, Halsin has this to say:

Halsin: Nature bows to none. It will fight on and survive, no matter what madness your god has inspired you to undertake.

Implications: Halsin views nature as strength, and admires that very much. He draws a lot of his tougher qualities from this aspect of the natural world.

Or a line where Wyll gently points out that he talks about nature a lot:

Halsin: When you care about something deeply enough, it consumes every thought and word.

Implications: Halsin isn't thinking of little else besides nature because he's "boring"; it's because it's important to him. (A special interest, one might say.) And when something is deeply important to a person, they think of everything else in relation to that thing; think of a sports fan who constantly uses sports metaphors to understand the world around them.

There's another party banter with Wyll that is telling when combined with what he has to say about the city, too.

Halsin: It is most unfair to pour such scorn on rats - they have their place in nature, same as you or I.

Halsin: I thought cities were supposed to welcome folk of all walks of life. Clearly I was mistaken.

Implications: Halsin feels everyone has a place in the natural world, yet that the city shuns those it deems different. As someone who has struggled greatly with fitting in/finding a place he "belongs", Halsin feels more sympathetic to nature, where all living things belong, than anywhere else.

I think that when you break up Halsin's love of nature into all the little things it implies, it paints a much more interesting picture of him, personally. It also supports the "Halsin is autistic" interpretation, which makes him even MORE interesting.

#halsin #halsin silverbough #bg3 #baldur's gate 3

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starfallforest · 4 months ago

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Stop putting 'Too Sweet' by Hozier in your Sylus playlists

I am sorry—this was clickbait. I don’t actually care what you do with your life. But I need you to hear me out for just a second, okay? I am extremely not neurotypical about two things: Love and Deepspace, and Andrew John Hozier-Byrne. And I have seen more than one person in the tags talk about "Too Sweet" by Hozier being a perfect song for Sylus and MC. My only discourse about this is that Too Sweet is a song about a man who makes continuous self-sabotaging life decisions being incompatible with a partner who has her life put together. In my humble opinion, both Sylus and MC are hot messes of people in completely different ways. Anyway, it’s a good song so I don’t blame you for putting it in every playlist ever. In fact, you should. But if you're into this song, I want to show you a couple more pls pls pls 🙏

I might just be autistic, but both Hozier's music and Love and Deepspace have something extremely important in common… and that’s BEAUTIFUL MEN YEARNING!!!1 And that’s not even to mention the haunting, raw sexuality we can project onto the stories that each of these things feeds to us. That's why I needed to make this post on the 1% chance that someone might hop on this brainrot train with me. So let me present, for just a moment of your time (if you're willing): other Hozier songs that fit Sylus so well I want to combust about it.

De Selby (Parts 1 & 2):

“At last, when all of the world is asleep You take in the blackness of air The likes of a darkness so deep That God—at the start—couldn't bear.” [azlyrics] [gaelic translation]

Imagine just casually writing THE love song that so beautifully says, “Before you were in my life, I kinda understood how God felt before he created the universe.” Excuse me? Andrew just dropped this stanza on us without so much as a cw: fuck you. And if that sickening portrait of gnawing loneliness isn’t enough, we have all the Genesis God references. Since all the LIs in the game are at some point likened to gods or rivaling gods with their power, then add the reverberating instrumentals and chillingly slow vocals in this 2-minute killer, tell me how this song does not fit Sylus. Not only that, but we also have imagery of his lover descending upon him like the night (which is invoked during Part 1 in the Gaelic verse), and I know that’s on the nose for Sylus but come on. I need you guys writing smut to have an orgasm during De Selby (at least Part 2) because it might change ur brain chemistry I'm just saying.

“When you fall on me like night—I wanna kill the lights.” [azlyrics]

This song still rules irt its playing with darkness symbolism, but it also refers to the darkness in the singer’s lover—which in Sylus’ case is MC and we all were there when she shot the guy in the heart like his freaky eye was telling her: “And your heart, love, has such darkness—I feel it in the corners of the room…” my goddddddd stop right there I can’t handle the METAPHORrrr. You think Sylus gives a flying fuck about MC’s frivolous morality bullshit? No he wants her to embrace her own darkness, sit under the blankies with him and cuddle after doing crimes and a beat poetry session. This is some fucking Hannibal Lecter beyond-dark-romance shit. I’m not even trying to write a dissertation here (and yet…)

Talk (from Wasteland, Baby!):

“I'd be the sweet feeling of release mankind now dreams of, That's found in the last witness before the wave hits, marveling at God… Imagine being loved by me.” [azlyrics]

Not only does this song utilize insane Greek mythology metaphor and Biblical comparison but the overall meaning of it is, “I want you so bad, I need to speak poetically to hide how down bad I am for you.” That sounds kinda like Old World Sylus and all his pretty nicknames to me.

NFWMB:

“If I was born as a black thorn tree, I'd wanna be felled by you, held by you, Fuel the pyre of your enemies… Ain't it warming you, the world going up in flames?” [azlyrics]

This whole song just some hard, deep and steady yearning for 4 and a half minutes. Are you kidding? The acronym in the title stands for Nothing Fucks With My Baby, which is sung in the chorus like some quietly violent war chant—soft, dark, and powerful. Anyway don’t tell me Mr. Sylus “Give me a list and then go to bed. I’ll take care of it” Loveanddeepspace wouldn’t scorch the earth for the love of his life—or do one better and stand by her side while she scorches the earth herself; here’s the protective/supportive mans anthem you ordered babes.

It Will Come Back:

“I know who I am when I'm alone—I'm something else when I see you. You don't understand, you should never know How easy you are to need.” [azlyrics]

This song has repeated imagery that warns of the dangers of taking care of a feral animal, and then compares the feral animal to the singer as a lover. Like fuck off, that’s sexy and haunted. And we know that not only does Sylus love animals more than people, but he’s pretty animalistic himself if we are to believe that maybe he’s secretly a demon or something.

Arsonist’s Lullaby:

“Don't you ever tame your demons, but always keep them on a leash.” [azlyrics]

Remember in Lost Oasis when MC goes on some tangent wondering what Sylus' past was like? Well it was this song. It's about troubled youth and learning to grow in your darkness. Also how cool is that imagery of demons? Hey Sylus, what do you have to say about demons? I'll wait. In the meantime I'm tattooing this shit on my clavicle

BONUS ROUND Through Me:

“Everytime I’d burn through the world, I’d see that the world—it burns through me.”

We got a man and we got some fire allusions so there ya go.

Blood Upon the Snow:

“To all things housed in her silence, Nature offers a violence.”

Blood upon the snow—it's red and white! Red!! And white!!! Also kind of a Sylus x Zayne anthem lbr

Ok I hope you found another song that inspires you to make Sylus art or fanfic with!! And before you ask, yes I've already assigned Hozier songs to every other love interest in the game. Ok thanks for reading!!! 🏃‍♀️💨

#love and deepspace #lads sylus #sylus #sylus love and deepspace #starfall posts

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writerslittlelibrary · 7 months ago

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Hey could I request a kate x autistic sibling where r struggles with social cues and Kate is protective of them?

Get your hands off my sister, drabble

masterlist requests masterlist

pairing: Kate x autistic sister reader

warnings: a guy hitting on reader

genre: fluff

words: 850

a/n: this request stirred something in my head I didn’t know I had. I’ve never written for Kate before but now I’m entirely obsessed with this dynamic! (I generally don’t struggle with picking up social cues, so I tried my best with writing this and I apologise if something isn’t entirely accurate:))

(if your name is Brad, I apologise in advance lol)

(more fics are coming lovelies I promise)

You do not have my permission to repost, copy or translate my work

|——————————— ⴵ ———————————|

Kate had been your big protector ever since you had joined the family. Being your big sister she had always felt a need to protect you, and when you were diagnosed with autism that feeling only grew. Kate was the person you always stuck close to. You’d be by her side when you had started school, and she had protected you and kept you safe.

When you grew older, and boys started liking you, you were oblivious. They’d talk to you, telling you you were pretty and complimenting your outfits. You never picked up on their intentions, merely smiling and thanking them.

When you got even older, Kate started dragging you to parties and such. You had never liked parties. They were too loud in you opinion, with too many people.

Because of that, you didn’t go with Kate often, staying at home and reading in the comfort of your room. However, this time was different. Kate had told you about a house party that some of her college friends were giving. She had assured you that it wouldn’t be too many people, and that it would be a good party to get out of the house without stepping out of your comfort zone too far.

And so, you had agreed, going with Kate to the college party.

When you stepped into the house, you had immediately felt easy. The music wasn’t too loud, and the people present weren’t swarmed around each other like a horde of bees. Unbeknownst to you it was Kate who had made sure of that.

When you entered, Kate had stuck closely by your side, promising you that if you wanted to leave all you had to do was tell her.

After being at the party for about an hour, you had found you were quite enjoying yourself. The people there were nice, and there wasn’t even one person that was drunk. You had even told Kate you would go and get a drink by yourself, so that she could stay and chat with her friends.

She had agreed and asked you to bring her a drink as well.

However, when you got to the kitching and poured your drinks, you were approached by a guy you hadn’t seen earlier that evening. He smiled as he approached you, asking if you could pour him a drink as well.

You happily did so, nodding your head and pouring him a drink. He took it with a grateful smile, and you figured that was when he would leave. He didn’t.

He stuck close to you and started asking you questions.

“I’ve never seen you at one of these parties before, are you new?”

You shook your head. “My sister, Kate, goes to these parties often. This time she asked me to join her.”

The guy nodded, looking you up and down once or twice. “You’re very beautiful,” he told you.

You smiled. “Thank you.”

The guy nodded, taking a step closer to you.

“How about we get out of here?” he asked, getting a confused look in return.

“I can’t leave without my sister. She is the one who drove us here,” you explained.

The guy shook his head, laughing slightly, thinking you were just teasing him.

“How about we go upstairs, find an empty room,” he suggested.

“Then we would be alone? The party is down here…?” you replied confused.

“We wouldn’t be alone, we’d be together,” the guy continued, getting slightly irritated.

“I don’t know you. Besides, we wouldn’t be able to hear the music upstairs,” you reasoned.

By now, the guy was getting frustrated, grabbing your arm and putting his drink down.

“Are you fucking stupid?! I’m inviting you to come upstairs with me, how hard is that to understand!?” he yelled at you.

You looked shocked at him, shrinking away into yourself as he yelled at you.

“Get your hands off my sister, Brad!” you suddenly heard Kate yell. She must’ve come to look for you when you didn’t return with the drinks.

“Relax Kate, nothing was happening. That freak sister of yours is so goddamn stupid, doesn’t understand a thing-” the guy, Brad, started, before he was rightfully interrupted by a fist to the jaw.

Kate had punched him.

After he fell to the ground, cradling his face in his hands, Kate had taken your arm, leading you back to the car.

“I’m sorry I left you alone, are you alright?” Kate asked after you two were settled in the car.

You nodded, slightly offended at the way that guy had spoken about you.

“What did he mean?” you asked Kate, who simply shrugged.

“It doesn’t matter. How about ice cream?” she asked, starting the car.

You nodded excitedly, reaching for the radio and putting on a song, humming along the lyrics as the car started driving.

Kate glanced over at you once or twice, glad she had gotten there in time. She may not always be there to protect you, but as long as she could, she would happily punch the living hell out of every person that tried insulting you.

Permanent tags: @marvelnatasha12346 @lesbionion @daddipantherr @darkstar225 @saraaahsstuff @marvelwomenarehot0 @screechcat @iheartjohansson @tia-thesimp @swaqcenix @karmasgxrl @marvel-lous3000 @hor1zond1ar1es @lorsstar1st @superlegend216 @ravensinthedaylight

#kate bishop #black widow #marvel #mcu #avengers #lucky the pizza dog #kate #natasha romanoff #marvel reader insert #yelena belova #kate bishop x sister #kate bishop x reader #kate bishop x sister reader #hawkeye

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the-goya-jerker · 8 months ago

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do you have any thoughts on nine inch nails/their song “closer” and the music video for it?

to preface: i am autistic and nine inch nails is a special interest for me. “closer” has a deeper meaning than “the sex song” and is part of a big concept album, and i genuinely think trent reznor is a great artist & director, but people brush off his music/videos because it’s “just” sexual or controversially erotic. well, like klimt or whoever said, all art is erotic!! everything has value no matter what part of your brain it is appealing to. the-goya-jerker dot tumblr dot com i think you are the only guy who actually understands this. you dont have to agree with me i just respect how you view art from the perspective of a nine inch nails fan

Thank you for bringing your special interest to me, dear stranger. I am a king, presented a beautiful gift on a velvet cushion. A princess being given the dearest of unicorn foals to nurture here.

I never knew that The Downward Spiral was a concept album. (My music knowledge tends to be broad and shallow over narrow and deep, y'know?). I knew a few songs (The Only Time is a personal fave) but I didn't know much about the band.

So, just as an overview of the album it's about the narrator's titular downward spiral. Wikipedia lists the themes as: "religion, dehumanization, violence, disease, society, drugs, sex, and finally, suicide."

Just looking at Closer, it's not hard to see why people think of it as a "sex song", honestly. But much like a lot of popular art, I encourage the audience to really listen to the lyrics here, to examine it in a different way.

The backing track (hiiii Iggy Pop! Iggy Pop cameo here!!) has a strong rhythm. The breathy vocals add to the sexual feeling of the song. The lyrics are, on a surface level, talking about sex. But there's some pretty loaded language included. The narrator doesn't just use your typical words like making love or fucking. He "desecrates" he "violates" he "uses". The use of the phrase "I wanna fuck you like an animal" isn't about the intensity, it's about self-degradation.

I think a pretty fair general interpretation (and do come correct me if you think otherwise anon!) is that the narrator wants to escape himself, his flaws, his self loathing, by having sex with people. He wants to be someone else.

This isn't a song about just having sex, this is a song about hating yourself so much that sex feels like it must be degrading for the other person just because it's with you.

There's also some things going on with religion and sexuality here. Sex is a desecration of the partner, it is making them worse, it is using them. But also there's this desperate devotion to this person. The way he says "You make me perfect / Help me become somebody else", the constant pleas for help dispersed throughout, even the section where he offers up himself entirely... it feels like borderline religious devotion. But this contrasts against the desecration in a way that's very fascinating to me.

As a review? I give this a 9/10. It's erotic, but not in the way most people assume. The devotion and degradation as constant themes really sell it. The religious themes add to it wonderfully. And I love to hear a man beg.

The only reason it's not 10/10 is because I know Closer to God (the reworking of this track) gets that honor. I think it just elevates the track even more when the two are presented side by side, and for me Closer to God wins out. The more staticky track is really right up my alley (I enjoy the more industrial and distorted sound of it).

In the end though, both feel transcendentally erotic in their own way.

The songs in question for anyone who wants them:

youtube

#Closer #Nine Inch Nails #Closer to God #9/10 #10/10 #art review

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moonyasnow · 8 months ago

Text

TWST OC showcase: Junia Rondo

Voice Claim: Saori Hayami (in her performance as Yor Forger from SPY X FAMILY)

Merfolk - Rainbow Parrotfish Right-handed Queendom of Roses - Octavinelle Dorm 161cm / 5'3 - #e85483 / 232, 84, 131 May 14th - Taurus - 19-20 y.o. 2nd year - Sophmore - Class B, no. 24 Pop Music Club Best Subject: Music Hobbies: The Macabre Pet peeves: People not taking care of themselves Favorite food: Fasolada Least favorite food: Plain Anything Talent: Singing Floyd-given name: Parrotfish Rook-given name: Demoiselle Chanteuse/Songbird Cater-given name: Junie-pie Signature Spell: 'Use Your Voice' Can perfectly imitate the voice of absolutely anyone, so long as she's heard it at least once

[ ~Based on the Nautilus Ariel's voice was kept in~ ]

Link to all my OC Showcases here!

Some quotes:

“No, no, Junia! You weren't supposed to think about it!” She slaps her cheeks. [internal narration] *It's better I not think about it. Besides, I'm stupid after all, so what would I even be able to figure out if I did? It won't do me any good.*

[internal narration] *Haah, what should I do?! They need backup, but I can't exactly fight…but there's no one else available to help!* She stands there almost in a panic, hesitating and second-guessing herself over and over again on wether to or not to run over. *But what could I even do?!* Then she hears that some of the people she knows are injured, and something clicks. She gives herself a light bonk on the head with her closed fist. “Ah— duh, I know first aid!”

“I-I would love to laugh at your joke, but to tell you the truth I am much too confused right now.”

She was born in the ocean surrounding the land known as the Queendom of Roses, in a cushy bay in the middle of the country. At least cushy compared to the rest of the open ocean, which was far more competetive when it came to survival. However, her mother was born in the Coral Sea. As a Parrotfish, her bright colors stood out against the deep blue, so though she was lucky to be born into a wealthy family which granted her some protections others didn't have, she was still forced to fight to survive. Her marriage to the heir of the Rondo family was what finally ensured her safety. Junia was born some years after, but her father died before he could meet her. Junia's mother then decided to move the two to the Queendom of Roses, where her mother ended up becoming a successful lawyer. Her plans for Junia, already fully formed at less than a year old, was for her to become an excellent student and find a good, stable career of her own. That way her mother could be sure she'd not only survive but further their family legacy.

When she got older and was supposed to start learning how to read, she tried her best, but could never make sense of it. The letters seemed to jump around and flow together, and she would sometimes need to spend 10 minutes just trying to read a poem. If she'd ever been taken to see a doctor about it, she would have been diagnosed with severe dyslexia, and also as being autistic, though the latter has nothing to do with her difficulty in learning to read and write. It took much more time and practice for her to be able to read than it took for her peers. Junia was also a very gullible person and tended to believe most things people said to her if they seemed somewhat plausible. She didn't doubt other people or consider that they could be lying, since the thought of someone operating in bad faith just never naturally crosses her mind. Some of the other children around her used this to pick on and even bully her. Because she had trouble reading both words and the room and was so gullible, everyone around her— including her mother— started calling her stupid. She started to believe it. As a child, people often remarked to her mother about how cute Junia was, and as she got older, they started calling her beautiful. Coupled with her reputation as being stupid, people whispered behind her back that her appearance was the only thing she had going for her. Her mother seemingly took this to heart and began raising Junia to be the perfect dim-witted, obedient housewife, since she hoped that at the very least maybe Junia could have a future as a trophy wife to fall back on if she couldn't get a good job with her own effort. Her mother told Junia that smiling made women beautiful, so Junia started smiling all the time. She told Junia that she was an ugly crier, so Junia stopped crying in front of others. She was never really able to make any friends, since her mother pressured her to spend as much time as possible studying. Whenever she tried to speak to other kids her age, she would always end up saying something that got her weird looks. Or she had trouble finding a gap in the conversation in which to speak, and since she had been taught that interrupting was rude, she ended up a quiet observer in the background enough times that she stopped wanting to try to talk to them. Instead, she grew very fond of animals, smaller fish with somewhat 'lesser' intelligence. For whatever reason, these fish always loved her, and so she would often spend time with them over her peers. These smaller fish who were sometimes sought out as prey returned the love she gave in full, and saw her for what she was, unlike other people who only saw what she lacked. People who saw how much time she spent with these creatures considered mere animals felt it only further confirmed their beliefs of her being an idiot. People began calling her 'Guppy' as an insulting nickname— akin to calling her a child and suggesting her intelligence was on par with one.

Junia had always loved to sing and play the harp, and wanted nothing more than to continue with her passions. She can actually read musical notes quite well, and has a really good musical memory, which means she can remember the lyrics even if she's only heard a song once or twice. However, her mother told her to stop, since she thought the songs Junia wrote and composed were too 'strange' or 'disturbing' or 'eccentric'. Being the obedient girl she was, Junia agreed to stop. She was even forbidden from humming in the house. As she became a little bit older, her mother became more and more concerned with finding a husband for her. This was when she started forbidding Junia from any and all self expression that she didn't approve of, which included her music, and Junia's love of an abundance of 'flower' patterns from the surface. She started preparing her and telling her about the things she would need to give up to be married. She must remain obedient and do exactly as her future husband says, in order to keep him happy. She must never do anything her future husband hasn't given her permission to do, she must never bother him with her worries, anxieties or insecurities, and never state her opinion on anything, in order to not risk disagreeing with him. She must be seen and never heard, unless spoken to, and her only value outside of having children is to make her husband look better by having a pretty, obedient wife. Basically, she must give up her entire personhood to be forever tied to someone she knows nothing about, and become little more than an accessory to someone else. Junia started to feel more and more as though she didn't want what her mother had decided for her and began dreading her future marriage, even though it wouldn't be until she was at least 18. But still, she said nothing. What could she even do about it anyway? She couldn't somehow convince her mother to allow her to not go through with it. If she decided to run away, she'd have nowhere to go, and would probably end up meeting with an even worse fate, since she's been so dependent on her mother her entire life that she has no idea how to survive on her own, having never been taught how. So, Junia started acting the way her mother told her an 'ideal woman' should.

Then one day, what she had dreaded seemed to come to pass. Her mother informed her that she had found a good suitor for her in the Coral Sea. And so they would be going there and staying for a month, so Junia could start getting used to the environment before meeting her husband-to-be. She was miserable every tail-flick of the way, and felt like she was being suffocated. She had to start to grapple with the fact that she would never be able to sing again. So the first chance she got, she snuck off into an empty area, bringing her harp with her, and started to sing a series of songs she'd been working on for years— something like her life's work. Her mother always said they were 'too creepy' so she knew she'd never get the chance to again. Unbeknownst to her, while she was singing song after song, she had a secret audience of three…

(They knew who she was. The Rondo family was quite well-known, at least in this part of the Coral Sea, and who would the Octomer be if he didn't do his research? They had also heard the widow and daughter of the previous head of the Rondo family were coming back to the Coral Sea after 18 years in order for said daughter to be politically married-off. Azul didn't take much note of it— at least not until the moment he happened upon her; tweets following behind after he'd been gone for a bit too long. The two first things that struck him were her bright tail and gorgeous singing voice. The ones that came later was her great conventual beauty, and the passion she seemed to have for each song she performed. Yet there was also a sadness reflected on her face every time she finished a song. He saw the facts:

These songs were quite…unconventional, or at least so a family as traditional as the Rondos and whatever company they were trying to marry into would believe.

She was here to be married, and did not seek very happy about it.

She seemed even more sad after finishing each song or having to go back for the day, suggesting she felt this was something of a swan-song to her love of music.

She was a girl with a reputation for being gullible, naïve; easily deceived. He smelled blood in the water and had Thaumarks in his eyes. He could use this. The tweels just snickered quietly behind him, matching his smirk.)

One day during her singing, when she had just finished a song, she heard a whistle, and clapping. Hands flying up to cover her mouth to cover not only a surprised squeal, but also the fact that whoever made that sound had heard her singing! She saw two eel mer slithering out of some nearby seaweed. They said they'd been listening to her sing, and wanted to keep hearing the story. Her eyes lit up with the stars ocean-residents never saw, and they knew it wouldn't be hard for Azul to convince her. They introduced themselves as 'Jade' and 'Floyd'— and only laughed or smiled each time she got their names mixed up. The louder one of the two even burst out laughing when she called him something WAY off the mark. He thought it was hilarious she was so bad with names, even though they'd started coming to listen to her sing every day.

There was something different about her when she had an audience. She was absolutely exuberant, and somehow put even more passion, emotion and effort into each and every song she sang. They thought she was interesting. She was clumsy, shockingly observant, skilled with her hands, oblivious, had 'etiquette school' written all over her and said the strangest things sometimes. She was like an open book— but one they couldn't predict. Without knowing it, she'd got their mental seal of approval.

As the day on which she would meet her future husband— and thus be forever trapped in a life she didn't want— was drawing near, she told her unexpected friends a bit about it. They obviously already knew thanks to Azul, but the confirmation was what made the three of them decide amongst themselves that it was time: she'd be taken to see Azul, and would most likely end up striking a deal with him.

Jade and Floyd had talked to Azul about what she was like before. Floyd often went on about 'Parrotfishie is so fun~!' and even Jade would smile and agree 'She certainly is interesting.' Azul, for his part, while not surprised at Floyd's opinion, was more startled that Jade agreed, given the latter often kept his feelings much closer to his chest. Everything they'd told him had him already prepared for her being a bit eccentric. But he was still surprised by her when he actually met her. She did say the strangest things sometimes. But she had this charm that always made her able to completely get away with it, cocking her head to the side in confusion, a surprised expression on her face when one of them laughed, asking with a confused, somewhat shocked voice if she'd said something weird. There was something comfortable about her presence, which he yet-again thought could be a great asset to them, and to his business.

When she was told that he was this 'sea witch' she'd sometimes heard whispers of, even back in the waters of the Queendom of Roses, she wasn't scared. She was surprised, even shocked, sure, but not scared. In fact, she seemed amazed, asking if it was true that he was really that good at granting wishes, saying that he was amazing with an expression of genuine awe.

And when it came time for the actual deal, she didn't try to haggle or negotiate the terms of the contract— she didn't even read it! It wasn't until much later that he would learn she couldn't read. Regardless, even knowing it might be dangerous, she had just laid everything she had in his hands, and was happy to do so, so long as she was still allowed to sing.

And thus, the contract was signed, and Junia Rondo never met her husband-to-be.

After signing her contract with Azul, a letter was sent to her mother. The specifics aren't important because Azul left a TL;DR on the first page in big, bold letters saying:

[The voice of Junia Rondo— and by extension Junia Rondo herself— is now the legal property of Azul Ashengrotto.]

And as Junia was 18 already, there was nothing the authorities could do about it.

She knew her mother was probably furious. But for once, she didn't care. She was too happy to be free.

Next thing she knew she went with Azul, Jade and Floyd to a sort of 'human boot camp' where, after drinking a transformation potion for the first time, they would be trained on how to live on land. They all struggled with the whole 'having legs' thing— none so more than Junia. It seems her clumsiness with everything but her fingers had come back in full force and even worsened now that she had legs. She couldn't even always manage to calibrate her own tail, so it was no surprise, really, that it took her almost twice as long as the other three to learn to use her legs effectively enough to not fall over. Well…fall over less. Baby steps. And she always had someone there to catch her. Though Azul, being used to eight limbs, also struggled more than the tweels. So at first when she stumbled into him, he stumbled as well, ending with them in a heap on the floor.

After completing their boot camp, Junia with the lowest marks— barely passing, but somehow good enough!— the four of them were enrolled into 'Night Raven College', a very prestigious magic school. Junia was a little worried at first about how she'd even get in, knowing it was an all-boys' school— would she have to crossdress? She wasn't super happy with the idea but she would do it if she had to! But then she just watched Azul hand over a big stack of Thaumarks to the Headmage and that was that. 'Oh.' was all she said, surprised it was really that easy.

At NRC:

Among the four of them in the Octavinelle Quartet, Junia was the one who took the longest to acclimate to walking on legs as opposed to swimming with a tail. In fact, even into her second year, she still tripped quite often. And so, Azul mostly had her working taking orders and showing people their seats. Because for as cute as her clumsiness could be, having to constantly replace plates and glasses she'd dropped and shattered was really draining his budget for the Mostro Lounge.

On Saturdays and Sundays, Junia would do almost nothing but sing at the Mostro Lounge. And on Sunday nights, she was allowed to sing songs she herself had written— ones that were way more experimental, intent to tell a story rather than just be a nice background song. And these nights became massive hits! A lot of people would come to watch just to see the next part of the story! And of course Azul capitalized on this, offering special offers on Sunday nights that lead to Mostro Lounge's business going up a lot!

She feels incredibly grateful to Azul for giving her a chance to not only share her music with others, but also for taking her with him to NRC despite the fact female students aren't typically allowed. She's gotten to meet so many different kinds of people there! And at a school with so many strange people, she feels right at home, instead of like the misfit she always felt like she was at home. And being away from her mother, she feels happier and more confident than ever. She's slowly starting to find out about strengths of hers that aren't just how 'pretty' she is.

But...she does also still feel very self-conscious of how 'stupid' she feels like she is. She had to get Azul's help in order to have the staff agree to a deal where she could give her exams orally instead of written on paper (bribes. he bribed them) and she is also the only student for whom this is the case. She always has to study alongside someone else because she's just not really capable of taking down notes since she's illiterate. When she does get that help, of someone explaining it to her, she understands it pretty ok eventually, but she still feels self-conscious that she needs that help in the first place. She kinda dreads going to class because of it.

The specific terms of her and Azul's contract were that Azul now owns her voice in exchange for her being able to still use it, and working for him for as long as the contract is in effect. That means not only singing at the lounge, but also working as a waitress, and— since Junia has always been seen as beautiful and attractive by those around her— he started using that to have her advertise the lounge and any and all new menu items right away. All without pay. But she would be allowed to eat 3 meals from the lounge for free a day— she'll be working for him, so he certainly can't have her be starving!

Since it's a very feminine voice, he couldn't really use it himself without it clashing with his appearance and normal speaking voice, not to mention he also already has Prince Rielle's pretty singing voice. But Rielle's voice can't do Soprano very well, just because that's not its range. So that's one of the reasons he lets her keep use of her voice. And he will admit that her natural charisma— and the charm her obvious, genuine passion for music gives all of her performances— certainly lets her make use of her song voice to greater effect than if he'd given it to someone else.

Junia is, as expected, great friends with Jade, Floyd and Azul.

She's often a bit startled and confused when Floyd drags her along to go follow his whims and do whatever he wants, but once her mind catches up she often ends up having a lot of fun. And through him she's also slowly starting to learn it's ok to prioritize things she wants to do over what she's been told to do. Azul is not always happy about Floyd making off with his best advertiser, but he never seriously punishes them harsher than giving them an extra shift to make up for the one they missed.

Despite being in the Pop Music Club, she sometimes goes with Jade on his hikes in the mountains. It's also a bit of plus for her since she gets to see more kinds of flowers! And birds, and other critters. She also always tries out Jade's new mushroom dishes, to Azul and Floyd's utter confusion and bafflement, and Jade's delight.

And as stated before, she has a lot of respect for Azul, and really admires him. And the two understand each other pretty well, since she was also bullied as a child, albeit less harshly than he was. She's also very quick to compliment him and tell him her positive opinions of him. He's had her tone it down whilst among others, since he doesn't want to end up blushing hard enough that his reputation is put in jeapordy, which she's gladly agreed to, thinking his shyness was actually really cute.

She's basically best friends with Cater, Lilia and Kalim as well, since the four of them are the only members of the Pop Music Club. She is actually often the only reason they get any kind of music practicing done at all. She also composes all the 'band's songs, since the others don't mind trying out something that isn't just an actual pop song cover now and then, and it's yet another way in which she gets to play her songs! Her playing piano well easily translated into keyboard, and she's also a prominent vocalist, but also loves being able to sing as a back-up.

More sprites:

#twst oc #twst #twisted wonderland #twisted wonderland oc #Moony's OCs #Spotify #🐚junia

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lesbianvamp1re · 11 months ago

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NBC’s Hannibal changed my life here’s why :3

(moderate spoilers you have been warned)

Overtly gay

So many shows have amazing queer characters but many of them refuse to make this explicit and only lightly imply it. First of all there are two women in this show who “straight” up get together. Hannibal and Will never actually kiss, however there are so many extremely homoerotic scenes between them that it doesn't make much difference. Will even directly asks Hannibal's therapist Bedelia if Hannibal is in love with him. Other characters in the show also joke about their relationship, referring to them as “murder husbands” or referring to Will as the bride of frankenstein. Another crazy line is when Will says he and Hannibal have “begun to blur” and he doesn’t know if they will survive separation. Will and Hannibal also have this thing where they are drawn to each other even to their own detriment, Will keeps coming back to Hannibal even when he should know not to. After all, you don’t go back to your best friend after they keep trying to kill and eat you.

Insanely cinematic

The whole show is just extremely beautiful. The transitions are amazing, and there are gorgeous shots of everything. The music is also a masterpiece and adds so much to the show. Hannibal is a cannibal, but he is also a very fancy cook which creates many moments where you know he’s cooking people, but the food is mouthwatering anyway. I cannot stress how cool the food in this show is, not only the finished dishes but you also get amazing shots of Hannibal cooking and serving the meals. And do NOT even get me started on the gore, it is simultaneously disgusting, showing just about everything in detail, and beautiful because of the strange and artistic presentations of the bodies. Additionally the show HEAVILY uses metaphors, especially to refer to Hannibal and Wills relationship and they both often speak in metaphors themselves which is a bit confusing but overall works very well.

Hannibal Lecter

All the characters in this show are amazing and have great development and stories but I will mostly focus on Will and Hannibal (shocker i know). Hannibal Lecter is a serial killer and cannibal for pleasure, he is labeled a sociopath but it is explained that this is somewhat inaccurate as he has no trouble socializing, and experiences empathy. However he isn’t really a psychopath either as he also experiences regret. We know that Hannibal ate his sister as a child but he says he did not kill her which is interesting (we aren’t shown much detail in this area). Hannibal looks down upon most people seeing them as being beneath him, although amusing, but he has no trouble killing them if he considers them rude. Will Graham is a rare exception to this as Hannibal is very interested in him and his mind. Will fears that he enjoys killing people and confides in Hannibal (who is his psychiatrist) about it which interests Hannibal. He still wants to cannibalize Will though because he doesn’t know how to be normal about his feelings.

Will Graham

Will has a lot of stuff going on, he mainly shows signs of being autistic, and he has an empathy disorder which causes him to be able to solve murders through heavily empathizing with the killers. His ability to empathize so heavily causes him severe mental distress when he spends too much time thinking like killers. He has nightmares and hallucinations, often about the “stag man” which is exactly what it sounds like. Also in addition it turns out he has encephalitis which makes this worse. The stag man is a wendigo which is an evil spirit originating from Algonquian folklore that causes people to have the desire to kill and eat other people. Here the wendigo likely represents Hannibal or Hannibal and Will's relationship, Will starts seeing it after the first murder by the Chesapeake ripper (Hannibal) which is a body mounted on antlers. Will likes Hannibal because he appeals to his darker side, and Hannibal won’t judge him for desiring brutal things. Also Hannibal is pretty manipulative and Will makes the mistake of letting him inside his head.

It’s basically a silly romcom

While it may not really be anything like a romcom, it is if you squint hard enough. Hannibal and Will's relationship is obviously very romantic in its own way. Also it’s best not to take the show too seriously all the time because it tends to be a little silly at times. The cannibal jokes are really funny.

#nbc hannibal #hannibal #did I just write an essay #enjoy this #if I messed up the details lmk #will graham #hannibal lecter #hannigram

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