#i lost track of what i was talking about

[cerealmonster15]

ougugugughghhh i get,,, so embarrassed when i try to be Earnest lol especially w/in the context of like fanart/fic like i LOVE when other people do it i LOVE reading earnest and vulnerable deep fics and seeing intense fanart etc etc etc. but then i do it i feel like i am Going To Be Killed LJFDKSLF SDJFLS

[leyyvi]

wait guys im thinking about esthetician levi again and just feeling so relaxed around him that you almost always end up falling asleep during the facial sessions and he smiles a little underneath his mask, maybe even chuckles too because he thinks you're so cute just sleeping while he's taking care of you ueueueue

[akkivee]

THE VOICE ACTING IN THE ENTIRE KUUKOU VS HITOYA CONFRONTATION GETS ME GOING EVERY TIME

[velvetjune]

the chapter songs in Alan Wake 2,, flawless

[faaun]

idk how to live so im going to talk to myself out loud until i do

[asterdeer]

realization about regis blackgaard i just had: in “the battle” he says he’s stupid with computers and relies on richard to do all the computer stuff, hanging back and asking a bunch of basic questions, but then in “double trouble” whit posts the article about regis being in vienna at some kind of technology conference, iirc giving talks about computer languages or something along those lines

which means that regis, after his escape, was considering finding another computer guy, then looked at everything that happened with his original computer guy — a teenage thug who spent most of his time (and some of regis’s pocket change) drinking sodas and milkshakes with a kid who had very little actual strategic value to their corporate espionage plans, and then used his “i’m in” skills and the moral code he’d accidentally absorbed from said kid to wreck literally everything regis had built in odyssey — and said “if you want something done right, do it yourself”

[dawnthefluffyduck]

Sunday doodles

[oh-cramity-its-amity]

i love my friends so much. i feel like yesterday i had a lot of shit going on in my head and i woke up to my friend explaining things in a way that put my mind at ease. i dont feel as anxious anymore because i know i was overthinking. i think my dad said it best when he told me that he thought my wonderful brain of mine just wants to think problems are bigger than they actually are. he is right! im just inexperienced in life and half of the time im scared im doing something wrong but- HEY. i need to be more confident in making mistakes. making mistakes doesn't define me as a person!! i need to stop worrying about doing life right and just live for the sake of living and doing what makes me happy!!!!!!!

[ruporas]

can’t look the sun in the eyes

[soyboywenzie]

man oh man i cannot wait for darksvster to leak the scripts for this season my gGODS

[elipheleh]

The truth is every queer person has the right to come out on their own terms, and on their own timeline. They also have the right to choose not to come out at all. The forced conformity of the closet can not be answered with the forced conformity in coming out of it.

-Alex, Red White & Royal Blue (2023)

i want to talk about this quote. full disclosure, it’s because i keep seeing some really frustrating takes (some of which veer into queerphobia) and i am getting a bit annoyed with people and rather than directly addressing it with them & appear to be picking a fight im going to make an analysis post in my space. (tbf. its mostly on twitter and i have a priv account so that limits me)

disclaimer; this is my interpretation, im not saying its the only interpretation just something to consider. i am queer & cognitively disabled - don’t assume malice and dont be cruel. i will ignore and block freely.

tl;dr/very simplified summary: it doesn’t mean “dont ever speculate about other people’s sexuality” but rather that ‘coming out’ in the way society understands it shouldn’t be a necessity for queer people to exist openly as queer. full context under the cut & self-exploration questions at the end.

so lets start with the context. alex is talking at a point in time when the world has read their emails and so knows both are queer (bi & gay, specifically), but neither alex/the white house or henry/the palace have commented. so more simply - alex and henry are known to be queer, but have not come out. alex uses the speech to come out as bi, and as being in love with henry. he also uses it to imply that he & henry should have the right to choose not to do this formal coming out alex is doing.

—

okay. lets get into the quote analysis.

The truth is every queer person has the right to come out on their own terms, and on their own timeline.

reasonably self explanatory. each queer person gets to decide their own timing for coming out, and the way that they want to address their sexuality.

They also have the right to choose not to come out at all.

this is where problems with interpretation have started to appear. fundamentally yes, this means people are allowed to not be openly queer/‘out’ if that is what their decision is. but it also means that they can be visibly queer - for example being in a visibly queer relationship; signalling with their aesthetic (e.g. someone being butch, someone who wears only ‘girl’ clothes despite that being at odds to their assigned gender); casually posting about queer things on social media etc - without addressing their own sexuality to others.

it does not mean that you should assume everyone is straight until they explicitly tell you otherwise. and quite frankly insisting that it does mean that is veering into homo-/bi-/queer-phobia because you are insinuating that being not-straight is a negative thing.

The forced conformity of the closet can not be answered with the forced conformity in coming out of it.

some people seem to be interpreting this as ���you shouldnt force people out of the closet’ and i don’t think thats quite to the nuance of what it means. yes, i do think that is part of it - in much the same way as the previous sentence - but it is not really the whole of it. in my opinion this is actually addressing - at least to some degree - the concept of ‘we should assume people are straight until they explicitly say otherwise’.

the ‘forced conformity of coming out’ addresses the idea that to be “out” you have to follow these steps; that you have to make a public statement that ‘this is my sexuality and i am [queer/bi/gay/pan/ace/etc]’. you are conforming to this precedent of “how to come out” that countless queer people have followed. there’s nothing inherently wrong with doing so, but actually there are different ways to be queer - and even being “out” as queer - that don’t involve following that playbook.

here’s a hypothetical to demonstrate my point. two men, who have never dated any women, live together & spend basically all their time together over 5-10 years. they holiday with each other’s family, they’re always together at events (e.g. weddings of non-mutual friends), but they’ve never told you/the public that they’re queer and/or dating each other. at what point does one start to assume they’re together? and does the answer change if its a man & a woman rather than two men? if a man & a woman did that, people would assume pretty early on they’re probably dating. but yet when it’s two men suddenly it’s invasive to speculate. this is where this concept of the forced conformity of coming out comes in - along with the veering into homophobia i referenced earlier - why must they say the words “i am gay” for it to then be ‘okay’ to consider that they’re together? (the homophobia comes into play because if you think being gay is morally neutral (which it is) then you shouldn’t have any issue with the speculation about people being together regardless of their genders.) the idea that straight is the default is where this forced conformity starts to really kick in.

—

i guess the main things i want people to ask themselves are these (and i have been asking myself these questions, there is no judgement or censure just self examination):

1. do you think people can be openly queer publicly without explicitly sharing that they are queer? (by this i mean in an announcement or in casual conversation. can you be openly queer without ever addressing it explicitly?)

2. if you do, why do you think that talking about the possibility someone is queer is something that should be hushed up? is it because there is an internalised concept that being queer is something abnormal and/or negative? if it was a straight couple would you feel the same way?

3. what does “coming out” mean to you? why does it mean that, what have you internalised to get to that conclusion & is it something that always works or are there other ways to be openly queer (or ‘out’ if you prefer)?

4. is it possible that there are queer people living openly and happily as themselves without explicitly addressing their sexuality to the wider world, who don’t want to address it publicly? does this make them closeted or ‘less’ queer to you? if so, what makes you think that?

[vulpinesaint]

smth about the like. “love that makes you understand religion” “love that feels like devotion/prayer” “kissing like worship” always hits wrong for me. maybe it’s just cause it’s gotten to be a little bit of a cliché and people still say it as if it’s something mind blowing but like. that means nothing to me. by which i mean religion Does mean something to me and this always strikes me as one of those things that people who aren’t religious go crazy for cause it seems really deep to them cause “religion” to them is something that’s just nebulously large and important and not something real. like it was cool to see people bringing up biblically accurate angels for a while but there’s a point where it’s like. man. you don’t actually care about this. you’ve never prayed to an angel in your life. you think it’s cool and that’s fine but let’s not pretend it’s deeper than that y’know

[cosmereplay]

thanks jupes! @windrunnered tagged me in a game :] rules: (make a new post) and list 5 topics you can talk on for an hour without preparing any material.

in no particular order:

The Stormlight Archive. Although that's maybe a bit of a cheat because just explaining what the story is about could easily take an hour

Peer support. The history, the philosophy, the practice, the stories. It's wonderful stuff and I could talk about it all day.

Intersections of physical and mental health. Based on my personal experience of mental health being caused by a physical illness, I have done a lot of research and now I have a lot to say about the intersections among mental illness, physical illness, medical gaslighting, axes of oppression, how the body works, etc etc.

Myself. I love telling stories about myself. It helps my memories stay more alive, even if it doesn't keep them sharp lmao! Look I'm middle aged and I've been through a few things 😅

The Canadian physical and mental health care systems. I have to be restrained once I get going on that topic!

tagging: @truthwatcher-vez @knight-of-skyloft @might-be-a-lynx @priscellie @wanderingchanneler

and anyone else! just tagged people who would think this is fun. please, if you do it, tag me!

[wormchaser]

chad (i found you through germs i think. if i explain how, i will look like a creep.^__^ so just think of me as a ghost. beside you like a silent melody i'll be haunting you..yadda yadda)

rolling around !!like a silent melody !! well okay ... i guess i could think of you as like my personal ghost following me around watching me falling over on the swingset and busting my lip. thumbs up

[horny-ex-catholic]

So last night I made out with my friend (hopefully soon to be partner. We're talking some stuff out) and aside from just being really fun, I learned I apparently really like teasing them and I may not actually be 100% submissive

[lilacerull0]

me when elena has mean thoughts about lila: okay, understandable.

me when elena has loving thoughts about lila: get this away from me.