#i like your brains. your brains are good
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wife left for a two week long worktrip today y'all 🧍♀️ which means i will either be writing at godspeed to distract myself or rot in bed missing her
#it's always either or#missing her#i'm a bit overwhelmed with the amount of requests right now but also so honoured people send them#not to mention super EXCITED for some of them#i like your brains. your brains are good#intriguing prompts#just gotta pump out some imperial russia essays first as per usual#our history is crescent here#carina chats#carina is a student#and missing her wife 24/7
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sometimes, you wake up and your first thought is "I cannot be a person today." often---most of the time---you have to then get out of bed and proceed with being a person, regardless of your feelings on the matter.
but sometimes, occasionally, once in a while....it's nice to email your boss, get back in bed, and go the fuck back to sleep.
#in my defense I do feel like warmed-over mud. but it's the kind of feeling I could push through if I really needed to.#I just decided that there wasn't much of a point.#not on a random friday. I will try again tomorrow.#(sidenote: once you start paying attention to your brain it's amazing how patterns emerge.#for example - guess how many books I've read in the last 48 hours. now guess when I did this last???)#(.....that said some of them were quite good.)#celestial emporium of benevolent knowledge
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Chapters 46 and 47 were…….oh my god
#maccadam#transformers#jazz#prowl#jazzprowl#Optimus Prime#optimus#fic fanart#momu fanart#I was so fucking normal about those chapters you wouldn’t even know I was reading#if you like#close your eyes and ears#OP being a good friend is totally valid reason to cry in 3 am#(trusting me trusting you)#spontaneously combusts#I can literally feel this fic changing my brain chemistry
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POV: you're Sokka and you're desperately trying to get to know the cute emo linecook from the restaurant next door but whenever he's on smokebreak his greasy stoner boyfriend is also there.
#artfromthefrogs#atla#avatar: the last airbender#atla fanart#zuko#jet#jetko#atla au#so you see the sokka/zuko/jet triangle im envisioning. do you understand my linecook emo zuko vision#can your little baby brain handle tracksuit wearing greasy mullet stoner jet. do you feel the toxicity of the jetko i am cooking up#hmmm i really enjoy stylizing things like this. like edgy lines limited palette. it feels really good! like i can communicate more#frog portfolio
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alternate surface au inspired by a few ive seen around on tumblr :3
#my art#pressure roblox#roblox pressure#sebastian solace#painter pressure#thought more abt my headcanons for seb’s anatomy and like. lol that tail is not pure muscle hes got guts in there.#that + the fact that there’s spinal cord in there means itd be a bad idea to try and amputate it#the wagon/eventual wheelchair is mostly for outdoor use i imagine.#<- specificallt]y for outdoor surface textures/debris that’d be bad for him to slither on#also. chronic pain have i dont think suddenly shrinking his whole body did much good for that#i imagine he and painter have like. a pool. to help with that and other needs he has now.#but he wouldnt wanna use it for a long while#there was a sort of. disconnect between his idea of freedom from urbanshade vs the reality of it i think.#like. thinking things could. on some level. go back to normal#and not considering that some of his mutations would be irreversible#and having to confront/cope with/accomodate himself about that#seb wants to be normal again but we cant all get what we want can we!#sometimes healing involves working with or around irreversible change buddy!#btw if feligayzed sees this. hiii hii your au was one of the big things that kicked my brain off on this and i wanna make fanart sometime#oh yeah this is . also.#sebpainter#pressure pathways#pathways#wow i dont think ive written a wall of tags that big in a long time. can you tell im having normal feelings about them
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don't pay too much attention to how metallic that metal looks. I iust wanted to draw their Russia reconnaissance outfits and Erik with white hair....
#every time i draw them i make charles' eyebrows more like cartoon/comics prof X 🥰#cherik#when you killed and maimed a whole house of dudes so you need to be soo nice to your good friend on the way back#eltsiart#i cant focus whatsoever on work my postcovid brain is sooo bad im happy i managed to draw something fully today :)
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hope you feel better soon!
I am riddled with ailments, but I stay silly!
#ask#non mdzs#My health journey has been: Hernia -> acid reflux -> Vocal pain due to aforementioned reflux -> chest infection.#I'm terrified to know what's about to hit me next. Please let it be something kind. PLEASE.#The consequence of living with linguists is that you'll wake up with a wacked up voice -#suddenly you're sitting you down in front of a program called something like Praat having your shimmer and jitter levels calibrated.#They gave me a GRBAS of 33012. I have a fun thing called a pitch break where a whole octave just does not exist.#My vocal pain was bad enough I ended up seeing a speech pathologist and that whole experience was super neat!#I learnt a lot about voice - to be honest I might make a little comic on it after some more research. Fascinating stuff.#For example; your mental perception of our voice modulates the muscles of the vocal folds and larynx.#meaning that when you do have changes (inflammation = more mass = lower frequency)#your brain automatically attempts to correct it to what it 'should sound like'. Leading to a lot more vocal strain and damage!#And it gets really interesting for trans voice care as well - because the mental perception of one's voice isn't based on an existing sampl#So a good chunk of trans voice training is also done with the idea of finding one's voice and retraining the brain to accept it. Neat!#Parkinsonial Voice also has this perception to musculature link! The perception is that they are talking at a loud/normal volume#but the actual voice is quite breathy and weak. So vocal training works on practicing putting more effort into the voice#and retraining the brain to accept the 'loud' voice as 'normal'.#Isn't the human body fascinating?#Anyhow; Now I have vocal exercises and strategies to reduce strain and promote healing.#Which is a lot better than my previous strategy of yelling AAAH in my car until my 'voice smoothed out'.#You can imagine the horror on the speech path's face. I am an informed creature now.#I'm my own little lab rat now. I love learning and researching. Welcome to my tag lab. Class is dismissed.#I'll be back later with a few more answered asks </3 despite everything I'm still going to work and I need the extra sleep.#Thank you for the well wishes! And if you read all of that info dump; thank you for that as well!
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“I wanna make art, but idk what people want to see from me—“ *GRABS YOU*
Do whatever you want. You have an idea? You plagued by visions? You got a special interest? You got daydreams about a oneshot you wanna write? Do it. “But how will I know what gets attention?” YOU WONT. THAT’S THE DEVIL TALKING. Say ‘fuck it’ and make whatever. I make art cuz ideas fill my brain & if I don’t see ‘em with my eyes I’ll DIE.
Make stuff cuz YOU wanna see it. If other people’s eyes see it that’s cool too.
#Art#art tips#*SHAKES YOU AGAIN#ok I’m cool I’m good hooo#I see artists frozen cuz they’re worried abt ppl liking their stuff#which I totally get#but art is for fun and making your Brain Visions real#I didn’t know if ppl would like NYSM or my Gaster AU or OCs#I just knew that I liked it & did ‘em anyway#Ok NOW I’m done I’m fine#Don’t mind me I’m just screamin’
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Really I think nothing shouts "my first Presidential election as a politically active person was 2016" more than the fact that when I feel hope and excitement for the future (possible President Harris) for more than five minutes I immediately get a crushing, all-consuming anxiety of "feeling this positive emotion now is going to make it so much worse when the worst thing possible happens" to the extent that I'll probably need my break-glass-in-case-of-emergency anxiety medication.
#politics#us politics#kamala harris#donald trump#2016 election#2024 elections#personal post#I can't feel any hope about politics without my brain reflexively shutting it down in case things get too nice before the fall#I know Harris has flaws#But I just like her--she's more progressive and feels joy and isn't shy about hating Trump#But then my brain is like “do not get attached or The Pain will be worse later”#This happened in 2020 too---I couldn't believe it when we won I was so busy preparing for the worst#harris for president#democrats#vote democrat#seriously vote democrat#If you are following me or reading my fic and capable of voting in the US election and are not voting Democrat please feel free to fuck off#You're the reason Trump won in 2016 and if you prove my anxiety brain right I hope all your food comes out burnt for the rest of your life#good thing I have therapy tomorrow
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JUST GUYS BEIN' DOODS
redraw of the meme under the cut
original by @knightmarebug
#knight rider#kr#michael knight#kitt#knight industries two thousand#bonnie barstow#mk2000#art#shitpost#doodles#having gasoline in a glass one foot away from a flame is a really good idea michael. your brain damage is showing#those bars were just so if i posted it to insta it wouldnt crop but then i thought it looked hilariously cinematic and left them for here#im very charmed by all kitt's alternate scanner patterns. i wish they were used a little more in the show but iirc the one car they rigged#to do that broke in like season 2 or 3 and they couldn't fix it. so they had to go without u _ u#but big emotions means big lights. to me. so he's happy about the date :) the whole bar lights up#he did that Once when he was scared for his life and i did not stop thinking about it. big feels is big lights#anyway i dont know what michael expected to happen; he's in the foundation's public garage. idiot dumbass#bonnie should get chessboard earrings she deserves them#''i hate drawing cars'' - keeps entering car fandoms. keeps drawing cars.
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for @hamartia-grander ‘s fic Another Time 🧡
this scene in the epilogue got me 🙃 i love them.
#It’s funny cause I had been working on this sketch a couple of weeks ago and got distracted. then I read your epilogue and was like OH SHIT#that opening scene was so cute and i remembered i had this sketch so i ran to tweak it to fit#it was fate 💕#or we shared a brainwave ✨#it’s not exact to the scene of course 😅#but same feels and vibes I hope#serennedy#serennedy fanart#leon kennedy#luis serra navarro#resident evil 4#resident evil fanart#your fic was soooo good and I’m absolutely in love with it!#can’t wait for the next thing 🤩#and again.. might not be the same looks you had in mind ( i could not for the life of me remember if Leon was blonde)#but its the brain image I got in mind#a little grown out blonde lol#and they might’ve been wearing clothes lol#but Leon with stubble.. here for it
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you do not have to walk on your knees for a hundred miles through the desert repenting
#me screaming on the roof of wangshu inn: YOU DO NOT HAVE TO BE GOOD!!!!#YOU ONLY HAVE TO LET THE SOFT ANIMAL OF YOUR BODY! LOVE WHAT IT LOVES!!!! XIAO!!!!!!!!#HES LIKE LITERALLY A LITTLE GUY. I KNOW ITS 2023 BUT I WONT LET THAT STOP ME FROM GETTING XIAO BRAIN DISEASE#he's also: in love with me. he is MY boyfriend. we went on a DATE during lantern rite#paimon got mad at me and had to be like WHAT HAPPENED TO BROS BEFORE HOES#what was i saying. anyway. uh. zhongxiao also#genshin impact#xiao#zhongli#zhongxiao#people!#comics
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i think im not a fan of what dc keeps doing with jason because they keep having him, the abused, become an abuser in some way shape or form. and the classism they don't want to talk about (i am being so for real there is a genuine problem of both writers and readers who do not understand jason's background and it pissed me off so bad because it always shapes their opinion of him in the wrong way and they don't care to even try to listen). and how if they were going to have him come back they should have had delved into his identity crisis and the inherent horror of coming back but not knowing how or why or what to do about it and not knowing what you were doing while dead and having to deal with time jumping forward on you and the fact that you will never get the time back and no one will he the same as they were before you died and how isolating and lonely that would be. and they also definitely weren't prepared for the fact that jason was grieving his life and his death and his hopes for his mother and his dad who didn't get there in time and the dc writers are fucking cowards. which brings me to my next point: why do we keep listening to them about shit because they are quite literally always fighting with each other and projecting their own personal biases into characters (i.e. making them worse than they are/2 dimensional/trying to make them iredeemable so their favorite character gets to shine) and also they are all freaks of nature with a consistent problem of being God Awful People who why would we trust them with these characters. jason todd they don't get you like i do
#it's 3AM and i woke up out of a fitful sleep to write this post#i hallucinated jason todd while trying to sleep#(just like them bitches in the comics always fucking do can we point that out. actually. they always fucking hallucinate someone in their#family but mostly jason. when he was dead and stuff#more hallucinations or give me death#i meant that figuratively#the second part#i want more hallucinations or give me someone talking about how that used to happen to them and jason going “wtf r u good ?” or#“ew keep me out of your brain freak”#(second one directed at tim)#what was i saying#ummmm#jason todd#he deserves better#coming from a similar background means i am his number one defender#i have mommy issues too so tack that on there#the way people look at and treat the homeless makes me infuriated because you dont get it#you dont GET IT#until it's YOU mother fucker
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thinking about this again so here's a part 2
Eddie wakes up to rain. Heavy rain, the kind that keeps the morning sky dark and bounces loud off the roof and the walls and the windows.
The rain didn't wake Eddie up. What did it was a pair of big, warm arms wrapping around him and pulling him in close.
Steve’s arms.
Objectively, this should be a good thing, and past versions of Eddie (even twenty-four-hours-ago-Eddie) would be goddamn irate with him for feeling anything other than vehemently positive about it.
He’s feeling bothered. He’d gone to sleep last night feeling bothered because Steve had sacked out approximately three seconds after they’d hooked up for the first time, and now he’s being woken up by Steve’s big arms pulling him in close and that has Eddie feeling bothered all over again because this isn’t how he thought this would go at all.
“G’mornin’ Eds,” Steve mumbles, the remnants of sleep in his voice.
And then he has the audacity to press a soft kiss onto Eddie’s bare shoulder.
"Y'know," Steve says, "I was gonna ask if you wanted to go to the diner this morning, but…sounds like it’s kinda fuckin’ gross out there. I can make us something if you want.”
Eddie sits up, suddenly feeling like he’s been left outta the loop on some part of this because Steve doesn’t even seem surprised to wake up and find Eddie still in his bed.
If there’s anything Eddie hates more than feeling bothered, it’s feeling like he’s left outta the loop, like there’s a piece of all this that he’s missing.
"Uh, what are we doing here, Steve?" Eddie asks, and he regrets it the second he sees Steve's face turn all hurt and confused.
"I don't —" Steve starts, pushing himself up on his elbow into a half-seated position, "What...what are you talking about?"
And isn't that choice of words just completely ironic?
"Oh, now you're interested in talking? Or are you gonna fall back asleep the second I start to-"
"Wait –" Steve interrupts, his eyebrows furrowed, "Are you all pissed off because I fell asleep?"
"I'm not pissed off," Eddie mutters, fiddling with a loose string on the edge of the sheets.
"What the fuck did you want me to do?" Steve argues, "Break out a deck of cards and suggest a round of poker? It was late! I was tired! I don't know how else to say it, man. You, like — you did a good job. Really had me beat, or whatever."
And, sure, Eddie allows himself to sit with that notion for a second before he shakes his head.
"I needed you to talk to me!” he exclaims, "We fucked, and then you fell asleep, Steve! Like it was just a fuckin' hook-up to you or something."
That confused look is back on Steve's face, but instead of being laced with hurt, this time it's just plain bewildered.
"What — Eddie," he says, "We talked."
Huh?
“Huh?”
“We talked,” Steve repeats, “Before we…you know, and I said that I like you and I said that I’m not really into the casual thing anymore, and you seemed pretty on board with all that, man, I dunno.”
And yeah, sure, Eddie sort of remembers that.
He definitely remembers when Steve pressed him against his closed bedroom door, and maybe he’d also been speaking at the time, but they’d been so close together and Steve had kept doing these little glances down at Eddie’s lips and there’d been this intensity in his eyes and Eddie had been pressed against Steve Harrington’s closed bedroom door.
There hadn’t been a single coherent thought in his brain, obviously, and yes, that included comprehending any of those words Steve might have been speaking so everything that had come out of Eddie’s mouth in response had been yes, yep, uh-huh, you betcha.
Eddie feels heat rising in his cheeks and by the looks of the amused smile making a home on Steve’s face, he’s not blind to what Eddie is currently realizing either.
“Fuck,” Eddie mutters, “I’m a fucking idiot.”
"Maybe," Steve allows even as he starts to pull Eddie back into his arms, "Breakfast?"
#steve is like: dear god pls let me tell robin about this she thinks i have no game#steve: i need her to know my game is so good it completely shut your brain off#eddie: don't you dare#steddie#steve harrington#eddie munson#might clean this up a tad and post on ao3 if i'm feeling it
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i think rafayel is surprisingly good at knowing your limits, actually. sure, he has a flair for dramatics and uses the last thread of patience you have like a jumping rope, but he's very aware of it. he does it on purpose. it ties up neatly into this half-unconscious urge to test you he has sometimes, to push and see if you still want him even when he's close to his worst. not at his worst though, when rafayel is really hitting his rock bottom he's viciously private about it and you need to be out of the picture.
he does, occasionally, push you past your limit on accident however and backtracks fast. whether it helps the matter or makes it worse is up to debate though, because he's terribly ungraceful about it
#i have this image floating somewhere in my brain where he's like “you know where the door is” if you're berating him and he's not budging#but the moment you turn around and start walking he's scrambling to catch up to you#also i think he's good at apologies if whatever he's done made you sad and absolutely terrible about making you angry#hoo boy does he have a lot of repressed anger at the situation he's in because he remembers you and you don't remember him#he DOES NOT react well to your anger#love and deepspace#rafayel x reader#lads rafayel
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HOW WE FEELIN POOTIS NATION?!?!?!
#my art#sillies#tf2#team fortress 2#lil pootis#lil pootis spoilers#spoilers#I litterally cranked this out right after I finished watching the episode#it was absolutely AMAZING!!#digital art#quaz I’m stealing your brain#you’re too good at art#if you keep it up you’re gonna be like the next uhhhh#hold on what’s an artist that wasn’t a total creep or died tragically??#anyways you’d be that#and then the world would just like idk implode or something#all /silly and /lighthearted btw#red oktoberfest#i guess? technically??
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