#i like your brains. your brains are good
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wife left for a two week long worktrip today y'all š§āāļø which means i will either be writing at godspeed to distract myself or rot in bed missing her
#it's always either or#missing her#i'm a bit overwhelmed with the amount of requests right now but also so honoured people send them#not to mention super EXCITED for some of them#i like your brains. your brains are good#intriguing prompts#just gotta pump out some imperial russia essays first as per usual#our history is crescent here#carina chats#carina is a student#and missing her wife 24/7
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sometimes, you wake up and your first thought is "I cannot be a person today." often---most of the time---you have to then get out of bed and proceed with being a person, regardless of your feelings on the matter.
but sometimes, occasionally, once in a while....it's nice to email your boss, get back in bed, and go the fuck back to sleep.
#in my defense I do feel like warmed-over mud. but it's the kind of feeling I could push through if I really needed to.#I just decided that there wasn't much of a point.#not on a random friday. I will try again tomorrow.#(sidenote: once you start paying attention to your brain it's amazing how patterns emerge.#for example - guess how many books I've read in the last 48 hours. now guess when I did this last???)#(.....that said some of them were quite good.)#celestial emporium of benevolent knowledge
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personal happiness or what the fuck ever
bonus:
#xmen#xmen comics#cherik#charles xavier#erik lehnsherr#professor x#magneto#jeans here too but ssh#snap sketches#i havent posted anything in what feels like forever and i GUESS i have to remind people i do draw sometimes. whatever.#aka in my brain i have at LEAST a five-page doujin where this gets incredibly nsft but i dont have TIME for that these days do i#so for now we get just. these scribbles. ill be able to make something exemplary again someday i swear <- optimistic#i think im going to close my comms off for the rest of december once i get through the batch i have now#which ... doesnt sound hard since the amount i have will probably take me to the end of december anyway š#i just need everyone to believe me i have better visions for yaoifying issue 309 .... the opportunity is right there...#like wdym the dream sequence is gon end on a panel of erik's eyes as he reinforces the idea charles needs happiness like scott and jean's..#call up your ex. right now charles.#what got me peeved about this issue is i have no idea what color eriks outfit could be vjaeLVKEJARK its like.#is he wearing a lab coat over a suit .... i think thats the intention ... or maybe it is a trench coat....#idk shit for me to figure out if i ever get the time to explore this thing again#LIKE UGH IM SCREAMING i have Such Visions that i dont have time to execute and theyre killing me#maybe ill just write them down idfk <- trying to write fanfiction ends even worse for me than trying to draw#anyways. im gonna drive myself mad good night everyone#i have to go to a christmas party tomorrow night. later tonight. whatever.#BYE
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Chapters 46 and 47 wereā¦ā¦.oh my god
#maccadam#transformers#jazz#prowl#jazzprowl#Optimus Prime#optimus#fic fanart#momu fanart#I was so fucking normal about those chapters you wouldnāt even know I was reading#if you like#close your eyes and ears#OP being a good friend is totally valid reason to cry in 3 am#(trusting me trusting you)#spontaneously combusts#I can literally feel this fic changing my brain chemistry
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POV: you're Sokka and you're desperately trying to get to know the cute emo linecook from the restaurant next door but whenever he's on smokebreak his greasy stoner boyfriend is also there.
#artfromthefrogs#atla#avatar: the last airbender#atla fanart#zuko#jet#jetko#atla au#so you see the sokka/zuko/jet triangle im envisioning. do you understand my linecook emo zuko vision#can your little baby brain handle tracksuit wearing greasy mullet stoner jet. do you feel the toxicity of the jetko i am cooking up#hmmm i really enjoy stylizing things like this. like edgy lines limited palette. it feels really good! like i can communicate more#frog portfolio
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alternate surface au inspired by a few ive seen around on tumblr :3
#my art#pressure roblox#roblox pressure#sebastian solace#painter pressure#thought more abt my headcanons for sebās anatomy and like. lol that tail is not pure muscle hes got guts in there.#that + the fact that thereās spinal cord in there means itd be a bad idea to try and amputate it#the wagon/eventual wheelchair is mostly for outdoor use i imagine.#<- specificallt]y for outdoor surface textures/debris thatād be bad for him to slither on#also. chronic pain have i dont think suddenly shrinking his whole body did much good for that#i imagine he and painter have like. a pool. to help with that and other needs he has now.#but he wouldnt wanna use it for a long while#there was a sort of. disconnect between his idea of freedom from urbanshade vs the reality of it i think.#like. thinking things could. on some level. go back to normal#and not considering that some of his mutations would be irreversible#and having to confront/cope with/accomodate himself about that#seb wants to be normal again but we cant all get what we want can we!#sometimes healing involves working with or around irreversible change buddy!#btw if feligayzed sees this. hiii hii your au was one of the big things that kicked my brain off on this and i wanna make fanart sometime#oh yeah this is . also.#sebpainter#pressure pathways#pathways#wow i dont think ive written a wall of tags that big in a long time. can you tell im having normal feelings about them
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don't pay too much attention to how metallic that metal looks. I iust wanted to draw their Russia reconnaissance outfits and Erik with white hair....
#every time i draw them i make charles' eyebrows more like cartoon/comics prof X š„°#cherik#when you killed and maimed a whole house of dudes so you need to be soo nice to your good friend on the way back#eltsiart#i cant focus whatsoever on work my postcovid brain is sooo bad im happy i managed to draw something fully today :)
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Remember: The burning sensation is part of the process.
#Mouthwashing#blood#body horror#Emphasizing here that this is in reference to a media and character and not a cry for help on my end.#Mouthwashing is one of those games that tickles my brain and checks all the boxes for my niche interests -#-but it wasn't something that got the silly comic part in my cortex firing up. My analysis brain is eating well though!#What said...It is impossible for me to see this scene and not say out loud: āMe in the middle of my work day".#While there is a lot more going on with curly I personally resonated a lot with his struggles with burnout.#Burnout feels like mouthwash to me. That you keep rinsing out your mouth trying to get rid of the rotting smell#but it's just surface level solutions. The real cure requires something far more significant to actually make a difference.#The job 'is hard' and 'everyone struggles'. It's part of the process right? You're tired? Anxious? Depressed? Us too! Chin up!#Actually I resonated with a lot of things within Curly (this is a curly positive space - he's not perfect. He's just human).#One thing being his desire to see the good in people and believe in their potential.#Because here's the thing. Some people truly do just need someone in their corner who stands by them so they can grow and improve.#And some people will take advantage of your kindness. You focus so much on their humanity while you stop being a person to them.#The horrifically toxic relationship persists because Curly tries to see the bigger picture and believes in the good within.#Anyone who has lived through constantly trying to reframe the hurt as something else knows-#-just how many excuses your brain will make to avoid cognitive dissonance. It's human psychology.#Jimmy sucks so bad. But we the audience have the privilege of not having years of baggage associating him in our minds as 'friend'.
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Really I think nothing shouts "my first Presidential election as a politically active person was 2016" more than the fact that when I feel hope and excitement for the future (possible President Harris) for more than five minutes I immediately get a crushing, all-consuming anxiety of "feeling this positive emotion now is going to make it so much worse when the worst thing possible happens" to the extent that I'll probably need my break-glass-in-case-of-emergency anxiety medication.
#politics#us politics#kamala harris#donald trump#2016 election#2024 elections#personal post#I can't feel any hope about politics without my brain reflexively shutting it down in case things get too nice before the fall#I know Harris has flaws#But I just like her--she's more progressive and feels joy and isn't shy about hating Trump#But then my brain is like ādo not get attached or The Pain will be worse laterā#This happened in 2020 too---I couldn't believe it when we won I was so busy preparing for the worst#harris for president#democrats#vote democrat#seriously vote democrat#If you are following me or reading my fic and capable of voting in the US election and are not voting Democrat please feel free to fuck off#You're the reason Trump won in 2016 and if you prove my anxiety brain right I hope all your food comes out burnt for the rest of your life#good thing I have therapy tomorrow
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Surprise @ornziy, I'm your secret Santa for AvA gift exchange :]. I did your third prompt: villain TSC Au
i will never give up the chance to make victim a terrible person so have some manipulative Vic
I don't think colour gang would be able to recognise TSC with how much they have changed in this AU
The bird may never fly in the sky again but it will be forever safe in the cage
@avagiftexchange
#alan becker#animator vs animation#ava#ava the second coming#ava victim#ava color gang#ava tsc#ava gift exchange 2024#sorry its kinda late#i really like your art ^^#my brain stopped working for a while when i saw that i was going to be your gifter#hope you like my take on villain TSC :]#i have said it and i will say it again victim isnt a good influence#anyways the birds in four smaller cages in the last piece is to represent the colour gang#victim's way of thinking is rubbing off to TSC and it ain't going to be pretty
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JUST GUYS BEIN' DOODS
redraw of the meme under the cut
original by @knightmarebug
#knight rider#kr#michael knight#kitt#knight industries two thousand#bonnie barstow#mk2000#art#shitpost#doodles#having gasoline in a glass one foot away from a flame is a really good idea michael. your brain damage is showing#those bars were just so if i posted it to insta it wouldnt crop but then i thought it looked hilariously cinematic and left them for here#im very charmed by all kitt's alternate scanner patterns. i wish they were used a little more in the show but iirc the one car they rigged#to do that broke in like season 2 or 3 and they couldn't fix it. so they had to go without u _ u#but big emotions means big lights. to me. so he's happy about the date :) the whole bar lights up#he did that Once when he was scared for his life and i did not stop thinking about it. big feels is big lights#anyway i dont know what michael expected to happen; he's in the foundation's public garage. idiot dumbass#bonnie should get chessboard earrings she deserves them#''i hate drawing cars'' - keeps entering car fandoms. keeps drawing cars.
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for @hamartia-grander ās fic Another Time š§”
this scene in the epilogue got me š i love them.
#Itās funny cause I had been working on this sketch a couple of weeks ago and got distracted. then I read your epilogue and was like OH SHIT#that opening scene was so cute and i remembered i had this sketch so i ran to tweak it to fit#it was fate š#or we shared a brainwave āØ#itās not exact to the scene of course š
#but same feels and vibes I hope#serennedy#serennedy fanart#leon kennedy#luis serra navarro#resident evil 4#resident evil fanart#your fic was soooo good and Iām absolutely in love with it!#canāt wait for the next thing š¤©#and again.. might not be the same looks you had in mind ( i could not for the life of me remember if Leon was blonde)#but its the brain image I got in mind#a little grown out blonde lol#and they mightāve been wearing clothes lol#but Leon with stubble.. here for it
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you do not have to walk on your knees for a hundred miles through the desert repenting
#me screaming on the roof of wangshu inn: YOU DO NOT HAVE TO BE GOOD!!!!#YOU ONLY HAVE TO LET THE SOFT ANIMAL OF YOUR BODY! LOVE WHAT IT LOVES!!!! XIAO!!!!!!!!#HES LIKE LITERALLY A LITTLE GUY. I KNOW ITS 2023 BUT I WONT LET THAT STOP ME FROM GETTING XIAO BRAIN DISEASE#he's also: in love with me. he is MY boyfriend. we went on a DATE during lantern rite#paimon got mad at me and had to be like WHAT HAPPENED TO BROS BEFORE HOES#what was i saying. anyway. uh. zhongxiao also#genshin impact#xiao#zhongli#zhongxiao#people!#comics
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i think im not a fan of what dc keeps doing with jason because they keep having him, the abused, become an abuser in some way shape or form. and the classism they don't want to talk about (i am being so for real there is a genuine problem of both writers and readers who do not understand jason's background and it pissed me off so bad because it always shapes their opinion of him in the wrong way and they don't care to even try to listen). and how if they were going to have him come back they should have had delved into his identity crisis and the inherent horror of coming back but not knowing how or why or what to do about it and not knowing what you were doing while dead and having to deal with time jumping forward on you and the fact that you will never get the time back and no one will he the same as they were before you died and how isolating and lonely that would be. and they also definitely weren't prepared for the fact that jason was grieving his life and his death and his hopes for his mother and his dad who didn't get there in time and the dc writers are fucking cowards. which brings me to my next point: why do we keep listening to them about shit because they are quite literally always fighting with each other and projecting their own personal biases into characters (i.e. making them worse than they are/2 dimensional/trying to make them iredeemable so their favorite character gets to shine) and also they are all freaks of nature with a consistent problem of being God Awful People who why would we trust them with these characters. jason todd they don't get you like i do
#it's 3AM and i woke up out of a fitful sleep to write this post#i hallucinated jason todd while trying to sleep#(just like them bitches in the comics always fucking do can we point that out. actually. they always fucking hallucinate someone in their#family but mostly jason. when he was dead and stuff#more hallucinations or give me death#i meant that figuratively#the second part#i want more hallucinations or give me someone talking about how that used to happen to them and jason going āwtf r u good ?ā or#āew keep me out of your brain freakā#(second one directed at tim)#what was i saying#ummmm#jason todd#he deserves better#coming from a similar background means i am his number one defender#i have mommy issues too so tack that on there#the way people look at and treat the homeless makes me infuriated because you dont get it#you dont GET IT#until it's YOU mother fucker
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thinking about this again so here's a part 2
Eddie wakes up to rain. Heavy rain, the kind that keeps the morning sky dark and bounces loud off the roof and the walls and the windows.
The rain didn't wake Eddie up. What did it was a pair of big, warm arms wrapping around him and pulling him in close.
Steveās arms.
Objectively, this should be a good thing, and past versions of Eddie (even twenty-four-hours-ago-Eddie) would be goddamn irate with him for feeling anything other than vehemently positive about it.
Heās feeling bothered. Heād gone to sleep last night feeling bothered because Steve had sacked out approximately three seconds after theyād hooked up for the first time, and now heās being woken up by Steveās big arms pulling him in close and that has Eddie feeling bothered all over again because this isnāt how he thought this would go at all.
āGāmorninā Eds,ā Steve mumbles, the remnants of sleep in his voice.
And then he has the audacity to press a soft kiss onto Eddieās bare shoulder.
"Y'know," Steve says, "I was gonna ask if you wanted to go to the diner this morning, butā¦sounds like itās kinda fuckinā gross out there. I can make us something if you want.ā
Eddie sits up, suddenly feeling like heās been left outta the loop on some part of this because Steve doesnāt even seem surprised to wake up and find Eddie still in his bed.
If thereās anything Eddie hates more than feeling bothered, itās feeling like heās left outta the loop, like thereās a piece of all this that heās missing.
"Uh, what are we doing here, Steve?" Eddie asks, and he regrets it the second he sees Steve's face turn all hurt and confused.
"I don't ā" Steve starts, pushing himself up on his elbow into a half-seated position, "What...what are you talking about?"
And isn't that choice of words just completely ironic?
"Oh, now you're interested in talking? Or are you gonna fall back asleep the second I start to-"
"Wait ā" Steve interrupts, his eyebrows furrowed, "Are you all pissed off because I fell asleep?"
"I'm not pissed off," Eddie mutters, fiddling with a loose string on the edge of the sheets.
"What the fuck did you want me to do?" Steve argues, "Break out a deck of cards and suggest a round of poker? It was late! I was tired! I don't know how else to say it, man. You, like ā you did a good job. Really had me beat, or whatever."
And, sure, Eddie allows himself to sit with that notion for a second before he shakes his head.
"I needed you to talk to me!ā he exclaims, "We fucked, and then you fell asleep, Steve! Like it was just a fuckin' hook-up to you or something."
That confused look is back on Steve's face, but instead of being laced with hurt, this time it's just plain bewildered.
"What ā Eddie," he says, "We talked."
Huh?
āHuh?ā
āWe talked,ā Steve repeats, āBefore weā¦you know, and I said that I like you and I said that Iām not really into the casual thing anymore, and you seemed pretty on board with all that, man, I dunno.ā
And yeah, sure, Eddie sort of remembers that.
He definitely remembers when Steve pressed him against his closed bedroom door, and maybe heād also been speaking at the time, but theyād been so close together and Steve had kept doing these little glances down at Eddieās lips and thereād been this intensity in his eyes and Eddie had been pressed against Steve Harringtonās closed bedroom door.
There hadnāt been a single coherent thought in his brain, obviously, and yes, that included comprehending any of those words Steve might have been speaking so everything that had come out of Eddieās mouth in response had been yes, yep, uh-huh, you betcha.
Eddie feels heat rising in his cheeks and by the looks of the amused smile making a home on Steveās face, heās not blind to what Eddie is currently realizing either.
āFuck,ā Eddie mutters, āIām a fucking idiot.ā
"Maybe," Steve allows even as he starts to pull Eddie back into his arms, "Breakfast?"
#steve is like: dear god pls let me tell robin about this she thinks i have no game#steve: i need her to know my game is so good it completely shut your brain off#eddie: don't you dare#steddie#steve harrington#eddie munson#might clean this up a tad and post on ao3 if i'm feeling it
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HOW WE FEELIN POOTIS NATION?!?!?!
#my art#sillies#tf2#team fortress 2#lil pootis#lil pootis spoilers#spoilers#I litterally cranked this out right after I finished watching the episode#it was absolutely AMAZING!!#digital art#quaz Iām stealing your brain#youāre too good at art#if you keep it up youāre gonna be like the next uhhhh#hold on whatās an artist that wasnāt a total creep or died tragically??#anyways youād be that#and then the world would just like idk implode or something#all /silly and /lighthearted btw#red oktoberfest#i guess? technically??
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