#i legit hope the readmore worked

[smallraindrops-blog]

Some wmftd and hades 2 rambles I wanted to share:

Possible Hades 2 Spoilers !

Hypnos with long hair makes me imagine y/n learning how to braid his hair to make it a bit more manageable

Also I feel like seeing hypnos with his long hair would make y/n want to try growing out his beard (achilles sheds a tear when he sees it bc his son now looks like his pa)

Rule #34 by Fish in a Birdcage reminds me of y/n and hypnos in the pirate au

The amount of angst you could get if hypnos actually does fall into a sleeping coma in the second game 💀 (reminds me a lot of the part closer to the end of wmftd)

I wonder if achilles and patroclus will ever meet odysseus in the second game (how would y/n act if he met him lol)

Imagine y/n and hypnos babysitting baby melinoe when zagreus goes on his runs 🥹 (maybe that would spark their desire for their own children ?)

The wmftd brainrot is getting stronger every day, but I'm glad I stumbled upon this blog <3

AHHHH i love these, legit making me feral rn. Same on the brainrot, my friend. I’m happy you found this blog too <3

Placing my replies and a little short story under the readmore. <3

Y/N would definitely braid Hypnos’ hair for him. Also he wouldn’t be able to cope with how pretty Hypnos is with long hair. Like he totally gets tongue tied just looking at him. He is so fucking pretty.help.

OH AND THE BEARD

I actually hc that Y/N rocked a short beard while working as a fisherman. He was shaved by the time he died because beards are often used as a grapple point during fights so he knew better than to have one.

Until they showed us Skelly I wasn’t sure if Shades could change their form like growing their hair but it looks like they can. (If Skelly counts as a shade, I am not certain where the lines between shades and undead are drawn.) 

But anyway, yeah. Funny enough, I was wondering how to show how time passed for Y/N and was considering having him grow a beard anyway lol.

Achilles would love seeing his son with a beard, Pat too. They would probably joke about him actually being a long-long family member that Pat didn’t know about.

However if I think what happens in Hades 2 actually happens, Y/N will grow the beard while apart from Hypnos. (Thanks depression! 👍)

I haven't talked about it yet but I suspect that Y/N and Hypnos will end up losing each other during the chaos and he is either trapped, helping Hermes or otherwise unable to find Hypnos. He has no clue where Hypnos is and just wants to find him.

Looked up the song, and dude that is immediately going on the playlist. Thank you for introducing me to them.

yeah, def. I’m willing to bet the Hades dev.team had their reasons for Hypnos being comatose. What I hope is that Melinoe still likes Hypnos after he wakes up ( bonus point for everyone if she actually thinks he is the funniest person around)

I hope those met up! It would be like running into that one coworker you dislike while in the dairy section at the grocery store and they won’t shut up and leave you alone. ( i love all three of them, those adorable old war criminals <3)

AHHH. Baby Melinoe!

Baby Melinoe is baby fever on crack, i adore her and will happily fight an undead army for her.

I personally think Hypnos is someone who always wanted kids, especially since he is kinda a big kid himself and would be one of those parents who could play all kinds of silly games with their kids.

Kids were kinda never on Y/N’s radar. There was his own trauma, the war then being on the run. Maybe in a lavender marriage, he might have a kid or two but it wasn’t something he seeked out. Seeing how happy it made Hypnos definitely planted the seed for him. I like to think Y/N would actually be a natural parent with kids.

I can’t articulate my level of love for her so here you go, a wholesome short for making past my rambling lol 

(The short)

The news of Princess Melinoe’s arrival was a welcome one in the house of Hades. It was as if the whole house had transformed around the little princess, there was a warmth, a sense of love, to the house that wasn’t there before.

You were going over the newly increased list of security measures that Master Hades demanded and Queen Persephone had politely requested. You had implemented countless measures leading up to the birth and more afterward but there was always more work to be done.

“Oh look who I found, Princess!” Hypnos’ voice reached your ears and you looked up to see Hypnos grinning at you, the aforementioned Princess Melinoe in his arms. At your questioning glance, Hypnos explained that he was on babysitting duty. 

“Besides, I am way more fun than your older brother, huh?” Hypnos cooed at baby Melinoe, tickling under her chin. The baby girl cooed back in delighted, high pitch sounds that only a newborn could make, little bubbles forming her lips and down her chin.

Normally Hypnos was extremely fussy about his cloak but grabbing an edge of it, he just wiped Melinoe’s drool away without complaint, his smile never fading.

Then, he lifted an expected brow at you. You looked at the baby in Hypnos’ arms, happily blabbering away. You never been around kids, not really. You weren’t sure if the little princess could even see past her small nose. 

She looked tiny and precious. And very, very fragile.

Hypnos laughed quietly. “She isn’t scary, dearest. You can tell her ‘hello’.”

”Hello.” You told her. Her eyes widen, staring up at you with wide mismatched irises. As if she was realizing you were right there. She blinked slowly. 

”Try giving her your finger.” Hypnos encouraged, and after a moment of hesitation, you obeyed.

Princess Melinoe grabbed at your finger with considerable strength and simply held on, staring at you with a surprisingly serious expression, blabbering away in nonsense. 

You made the appropriate noises like you could understand her and repeated, ‘indeed, Princess.’ along with ‘you are definitely much smarter than your brother.’

A smile formed on your face without you noticing.

You didn’t see the soft way Hypnos glanced at you, realizing the quiet hope that was forming in his chest. When it was time for Hypnos to return Princess Melinoe to her mother, you didn’t know that Hypnos was already putting together a conversation to have with you later.

You never knew.

[gren-arlio]

Back on schedule. Welcome to Part 2 of Waku Puyo Extras.

Nice art aside, hello everyone, was supposed to post this yesterday but got busy watching EVO and Magic Kaito 1412. Welcome to the second part of IDK how many parts of Waku Puyo Extras, where I find videos related to the route I'm currently translating and looking at and add more to what's there, since I know I missed stuff. Lots of it.

AKA, if you have any specific screenshots you want me to translate, LMK. For any route.

For those who are confused, or are new, I translated Schezo's storyline (for the most part) in my blog. Now, I'm just finding bits I've missed and just adding onto those.

Post will cover 2 videos today:

Small bit I completely glossed over on accident between Episodes 5 and 7 (6 isnt real).

What happens if you become a heartless beast and say no to being Serilly's friend from Episode 4, given to me via @kirstenonic05 once again. Thanks for that again.

I have a feeling these Extras are gonna be fairly short compared to others, so have fun with that.

With that, the first video:

This legit is just a scene I missed. My work really is getting easier.

The video here is...interesting due to how the events are unfolded here. The introduction from 0:08 to 0:58 is on Episode 5 of me doing this, and 1:15 is the start of Episode 7. However, thankfully, there's one new whole area of text that my video didn't cover at 1:32, where we have an Arle and Carbuncle encounter.

For convenience sake, I'll just be doing that new part. The rest are already translated by yours truly on the designated episodes.

With that, the Readmore section will cover the translations and the Serilly stuff too. Hope you enjoy this.

Arle and Carbuncle Encounter: (1:32)

Schezo:

Ugh, that's...

Arle:

...Something's bothering me about Schezo lately...

Carbuncle:

Gu?

Schezo:

(You're worried about me!? What's going on...?)

Arle:

Ah, Schezo! How long have you been there...?

Schezo:

N-no...it's not like I was eavesdropping or anything...

Arle:

Well, you know...today, Schezo...

No, it's nothing, sorry! Let's go Carby.

Schezo:

... (What were you trying to say?

No, no way...)

Arle:

Hey, Carby! Over here!

...Schezo, why are you blushing?

Schezo:

Whoa! Where did you come from!?

Arle:

Schezo really has been acting weird today after all.

...Then again, he's always weird.

Schezo:

... ... ...

Huh!? I'm not a fool or a weird guy, Arle! (You kinda are bub)

-----

I guess the Horror House is just the Land of Misunderstandings. I dunno, maybe it's just me.

With that small thing outta the way, lets begin with the other part: Becoming evil and not being Serilly's friend.

For those unaware, lemme give context:

Serilly... doesn't exactly have a boss fight. She's on the floor where you're supposed to have a fight, but she just... doesn't fight. You're given the option to be her friend or not instead, posted below.

(Top is No, bottom is Yes.)

The route I went said yes, posted in the episode count. Today, we're gonna see what'll happen if we say no via this video.

I'll be translating this entire section. It'll be fun.

-----

Saying No to Serilly:

Serilly:

Ah, you're here... Do you want to pick on me that badly?

Schezo:

Well, why do I seem like that sort of person?

Serilly:

Because...you look scary...

Schezo:

(Hm, I thought I was cool, but when you mention it, you're not wrong...)

Serilly:

...You really did come here to bully me, didn't you?

Schezo:

Of course not. If you're not the enemy, I won't fight you.

Serilly:

O-oh... so, you want to be my friend?

Schezo:

Eh? No, that's not...

Serilly:

...Is that a no?

Schezo:

(Err...what should I do?)

[We pick no and cry like men.]

...No, sorry, I can't get along with women well. (Ehhh...valid point considering you hang around Arle and Co. a lot?)

Serilly:

Oh no...is it because I don't have legs...

Schezo:

(I made you cry!? Out of all the things to cry over...)

Serilly:

That's right. You don't have to be friends with someone like me after all...

Schezo:

...Don't talk about yourself like that.

Serilly:

Eh?

Schezo:

Don't say "I don't care about myself," in such a self-deprecating way.

Serilly:

Wh-wha...

Schezo:

In life, there's routes you can take.

2 routes, to be precise. One is to always look down like you're doing right now.

The other way is to be like me, always moving forward.

Serilly:

Always...moving...forward?

Schezo:

Yeah, as long as you give up on always being unhappy.

If not, you'll never move on, never change, and never be happy.

Serilly:

... ... ...

Schezo:

You should really try to be happier about things.

That's how you make friends.

Serilly:

Well, if I try hard enough, will you be my friend?

Schezo:

Yeah, alright. So just keep moving forward.

Serilly:

Y-yes!

Schezo:

(Sorry, I shouldn't be preaching...

Wait, what in the world am I saying? I don't care if this girl is happy or not...)

Serilly:

Um...Well, excuse me.

(She leaves and chest appears.)

Schezo:

What?

Even if the treasure is right there, I can't get it! Hey, go get it for me...

...There's no one here! What am I gonna do now...

-----

In the end, you'll always become her friend. Guess Schezo doesn't exactly have the heart to fully say no. You Are Not Immune to Serilly Propaganda.

Amazing scene overall though for both characters. And with that, I think that'll be all for this week.

Cya next week, guys.

[gothicvalentine]

I'm so livid right now! I don't normally get this angry but ffs. I'm almost shaking I'm so pissed off.

This is really, really long because I don't do brevity and because background is needed to understand the situation so this is continued under the cut. I'm on mobile though so I really hope it adds a cut. If not, I'll edit my post later when I get on my laptop.

Warning: in addition to being an extremely long post, I mention feeling suicidal so if that might be triggering to anyone, please skip reading this. Thanks!

:read more:

So I don't have water. Haven't for about a year and a half. Because my depression is so bad I'm I haven't been doing self care or housework for years (at least).

Things got so bad I finally decided to file for social security disability in mid March 2021.

We have a local agency here which is a Christian place that ostensibly helps people with things they need. They have a shower for use that I was allowed to use a few times (knowing it's there is great but I still have zero motivation to use it).

With no water, I've been buying gallon jugs of water when I still had some money or with my food stamps. With the price of everything skyrocketing, I've decided spending at least $5 a week on water could be cut to zero or a bit more if they didn't mind if I filled up 2 gallon jugs of water a couple of times a week.

After all, I wasn't using their water to bathe and they'd said another client came in to fill up water jugs so they said I could as well. They were the ones who actually suggested it when they interviewed me last year!

I stopped in last week and they're was only an intern there and she didn't know what to do so she asked someone on the retail side (or whatever--they have an attached thrift shop) since everyone else was in meetings.

I was given the ok and I filled up 2 jugs. I wanted to check this time before I just stopped in, especially since they were so weird about it last time, so I called and they picked up the phone today.

I don't know if this lady was an intern or not but she wanted me to come in for an interview again. I asked if that was an annual thing (because nothing has changed since last year) and she said she didn't think it normally would be, but they're had a lot of staff changes. They'd also like to talk and get to know me "to see if there's anything else they'd be able to help with." Uh huh, sure. You mean you want to try to convert me. 🙄

I was not happy about it and I think this lady could tell but I agreed and I guess their first available is not until next Monday afternoon. Since that's an entire week, I asked if I could at least fill up my water before then and she hemmed and hawed (fuck, I'm really dating myself aren't I?) and essentially said that no, I couldn't.

Her excuse was they they are closed Thursday and Friday and will be very busy the rest of the time and might be in and out of the office. Yeah because filling up a jug of water is going to take 30 minutes. And I'll need to be heavily supervised so I don't rob them blind while I'm filling up the water or something.

I wrote them off last year because I asked for help with some really tall weeds and brush, trees, etc. I don't have the lawn gadgets to take care of this on my own even if I wasn't too depressed to get out of bed to do anything. In addition I have a number of physical issues that make it really hard, if not impossible to do many things. (I think it's probably severe anxiety plus my gastroparesis, but I'm nauseous most days and vomiting some)

The place knew I had no income last year so they didn't ask me to pay them (they said they usually for a contribution) but they asked if I could help them remove the trees and weeds. I told them I would be willing to help if I was able to and felt ok that day. They said they'd need to meet with their volunteers and would get back to me.

Stupid me. I had thought nothing of telling them that I would be losing my home, probably before 2022 since I had no way to continue to pay my mortgage and even if I did, my home requires extensive repairs. Even the city sent a notice saying my roof needed to be repaired. 😳 (they never did that when I lived in Des Moines!)

When they finally called me back, they said they'd talked to their volunteers but the volunteers weren't willing to help me if I wasn't going to be staying in my home. Wtf?!?!

I had told the Christian place that the city had given me a notice that it needed to be done or they'd do it (and it would probably be several hundred minimum for the city to do it, plus you can't just not pay a government agency back--they will legit take your license until it's paid--I checked)

I was so stressed out but luckily I called the city and explained the situation and they haven't taken action against me yet.

I'm still in my home because the mortgage company gave me a forbearance then wrote off the late charges and everything. I was able to make 1 payment (barely) with a little leftover money I had from my LTD policy benefits that ran out in February, but it's ready to go back into foreclosure again next month.

I'm just so, so upset that I have to jump through all these hoops to fill up on a few gallons of water for the week--and because apparently Christians don't care if other people go without water or something. (and before someone @s me: #notallchristians)

Fuck my life.

To make things infinitely worse, I'm a hoarder. With no one to help me. So I don't have motivation to get out of bed or anything, let alone clean and pack . . . a normal house.

My home isn't normal and hasn't been for decades. And my therapist told me I'm stressing her out because I'm having so much trouble doing anything and have no motivation despite knowing if I don't act I'll lose even the stuff I value most.

I had a peer support person who was really nice and said she'd be willing to help, but she quit last week. 😭

I have family who know at least part of my situation but none of them have contacted me in months (and I'm always the one who has to reach out to them).

I stopped reaching out because I know being super depressed and negative is a downer for most (all?) people. Plus, since I'm struggling I don't want people to think that's why I'm reaching out to them.

Of course, I do really need help and it would be great if at least one person in my family was willing to be there for me at this time. (my daughter is helping out some financially where she can, but she's the only one) *fyi I can repay my daughter easily if I get approved for SSDI but if I don't (which I'm terrified will happen--how bad do things have to be? Are my providers even understanding how bad things are? Are they documenting this well?) and I end myself instead, she's the beneficiary of my 75k or so IPERS account.

I'm afraid that my home will foreclose and I won't get my stuff and instead of just giving up on my stuff, that I'll decide I can't go on without my things and try to kill myself again. I don't even think that would be a bad thing.

I'm so tired of constantly suffering. Why do people think it's ok for people to commit suicide if someone is terminally ill, but not for long term severe mental illness? I know mental pain is supposed to be fleeting, that suicidal ideation is supposed to be fleeting. But what if it isn't?

And what if you have a lot of physical pain and mental pain and it's just so unbearable when you feel like no one even cares? If your own family apparently gives zero fucks about you, how in the everloving hell is anyone else supposed to care?!?!?

Sorry for burdening anyone who reads this. I just don't feel like my family cares and my mental health providers are paid to pretend to care and I don't think they really listen or at least understand what I'm trying to tell them. What I keep telling them over and over. I just needed to finally put this out there somewhere.

I was going to post something similar a few months ago, but decided not to because 1) I didn't want to bring anyone down or stress them out and 2) I didn't want to risk a welfare check by the police or something.

I'm not actively suicidal atm (like with a plan and the intent) plus, cops are really bad at de-escalating situations. So bad that suicide by cop has crossed my mind. But I'm white and female so I'm not sure I'd be a sufficient enough threat for that to be a valid option anyway.

[taekxxkie]

I was just...thinkin’ about waking up next to soft, cuddly Namjoon.

The haze of sleep is fading and the very first thing you’re aware of is the heavy feeling of his half-hard dick nudging into your backside. Namjoon had just rolled over in his sleep and sought out the warmth of your body under the blanket, tugging you around your waist and drawing you in nice and tightly against him. His body’s natural response to the softness of your curves was immediate, and you shifted your hips back to grind into him appreciatively.

“Good morning, Joonie.” You mumble, stifling a yawn. He doesn't respond and you realize that he's, at least partially, still asleep. Rolling over in his slack embrace, you tuck yourself into his front, pressing a trail of kisses across his shoulder. “Good morning.” You say again, hoping to wake him up.

His only response is a soft grunt, and you smile against the warmth of his skin. Namjoon hugs you just a little bit tighter, before his grip falls lax again and you pause, waiting for him to stir himself properly out of slumber, but instead he drifts right back off to sleep in a surprisingly quick amount of time. You know he's tired, working as hard as he does and you really, really want to let him sleep. It's easy to tell yourself to fall back asleep in his embrace and ignore the poking of his erection at your lower belly, but it's much more difficult to resist the temptation of his warm, soft skin. Before long you're kissing him, fully intending once more to stir this resting man awake.

Your lips glide over his shoulder and neck again, tongue sneaking out for a taste. You move across his cheek with your kisses, pressing one lightly across his plush lips. Your hand lifts to caress his face, eyes scanning his features as he still sleeps peacefully.

He's handsome, but especially so when he's relaxed like this. You toy gently with his hair and admire his face just for a moment or two, thankful that your boyfriend is a heavy sleeper so you can get these special little moments with him.

Sometime later, you would recall this moment tenderly and smile fondly at him across the room, and he would bashfully smile back in that way he did when he found something cute, totally unaware of how much your heart ached to lay him down and study his every feature in adoration like you were right now.

Another gentle peck to his pillowy lips and your mind was made up; this gorgeous man of yours needed to roll over flat onto his back and you were going to wake him up the way he deserved. Your lips were on his collarbone first, your tongue lightly grazing the warm skin before you shifted downward, on a mission. Moving down his chest, his ribs, and finally his cute tummy got some extra kisses before you were carefully glancing up for his reaction as your hand made contact with the heavy bulge at the front of his boxers.

He was laying mostly erect and hugged to the side of his inner thigh, and when your hand made contact with him there his head suddenly lifted off of the pillow and his eyes, blurry, squinting and blinking hard, were trying hard to focus on you.

"Mm, good morning, baby." His voice was husky from sleep, deeper than usual. Namjoon reached with both hands to rub at his eyes in an attempt to help them focus on the sight of your face peering up adoringly at him while your palm smoothed over his cock through his boxers.

You smile, amused at how easily he wakes up when you're in this specific position. Your hands get to work tugging down the front of his boxers until his erection is free, and knowing how sensitive your man is first thing in the morning, you spend some time getting him ready. He always wants your hands first.

Delicate and sure in their movements, Namjoon watches with messy bed hair sticking up almost comically, his jaw slack as your fingers curl snugly around the shaft of him. You stroke nice and slow a few times, base to tip, taking care not to give too much attention to the sensitive head, at least not yet. When his tensed up thighs finally begin to relax, and when he lets out a low, breathy moan, you lower your head and take him into your mouth.

Namjoon groans and his hips nudge forward, shoving himself farther up into your mouth all at once and you draw back a little, trying not to gag. His voice is muffled as he says, "Sorry, baby...you just feel so good."

You work yourself up to taking more and more of him as you can, the warm, wet confines of your mouth and throat hugging him tight and stroking him just right. Namjoon stretches his limbs and flexes his hips up into you again but this time, you're ready for it. He grips your hair very gently, not wanting to hurt you, but he's worked up to a release already and he's right there.

Your name tumbles from his lips, and he's watching transfixed at the way your lips look so beautiful wrapped tight around his shaft.

"So good for me." He pants, desperately close to finishing. "Where do you want it, baby?" He asks, and even the filthy question sounds tender and sweet as his hands begin to gently stroke your face, petting your cheeks. You don't reply, you just look up at him from under your lashes, in love and wanting to give him anything, everything he wanted. "Will you swallow it for me?" He asks, a smile playing on his lips when you attempt to nod with his cock thrusting insistently in and out of your mouth.

It doesn't take long at all, not in the early hours of the morning when your man is feeling a little extra sensitive and his body is relaxed from a good night's sleep with you wrapped up in his arms. With your affectionate touch and adoring look up at him, he comes on your tongue, mouth wide open, and he's so in love with you when you swallow that he could weep, but instead, he reaches down and wraps his arms around you and tucks the covers around you securely, and he showers you with kisses and words of praise and affection.

[inappropriatewenning]

I keep trying to put a finger on why “the problem with jin guangyao is that he’s too ambitious” bothers me so much as an argument.  Because it’s one thing to say “he does really bad things to reach his goals,” but I often see the ambition itself cited as Why He’s Bad.  (I also see plenty of other reasons for hating him that I think are fair--he kills characters we like, he lies to characters we like, he eventually develops class solidarity with his father’s society rather than his mother’s...)

But “his problem is ambition” strikes me as a real misreading of the situation.

This is an incredibly ambitious world.  There are competitions left and right to test one another’s strength and skill. There are lists and rankings everywhere you look.   People duel each other routinely.   People strive to develop unique and powerful magic and fighting techniques.  The Nies strive for personal achievement with a toxic technique that almost-inevitably kills them.  Or heck, cultivating to immortality is a thing.  That’s ambitious!

(Readmore cut, because sorry sorry I get long here and a little incoherent. tl;dr: there are a lot of problems* with jgy that are adjacent to ambition but it’s inaccurate to say that ambition itself is the problem)

And it’s certainly legit, as a reader, to say “that’s all immoral,” or “that’s all missing the point of morality.”  It’s a fair thing to question!  Questioning the cultivation world is a big point in MDZS.  And then you can take a trip over to TGCF and meditate more on the moral dimensions of achievement and whether it’s better to be a lonely trash-picker or a prince who tries to save the world.  You could also distinguish between ambition for personal power (being a super cool strong cultivator who can kill lots of badguys) and political power (being a super cool strong sect leader who can direct public works to kill badguys).  That’s an interesting wrinkle and it’s probably worth looking at more some time.

But in MDZS I feel like the two people I see charged most often with “ambition (derogatory)” are Jin Guangyao and Jiang Cheng.  I’m not going to get into Jiang Cheng here, but...Meng Yao, man.

He has goals.  It’s true!  He has goals!  After his mother dies he attempts to enter his father’s world.  If you want to say that’s Bad Ambition, fair enough: again, you can say the sect world is morally flawed.  But in that case, I hope you’re also arguing that really it would have been better for little Wei Ying’s soul if he’d been left on the streets.  The only virtuous life is one of pure humility and suffering in the shitty old non-magic world. (Or is the argument fundamentally just that little Meng Yao from the brothel should have known his place...?)

Then, yeah, this is where most people would say things go bad.  For reference, I’m talking novel here, not CQL, but even in the novel the guy does bad things!  Murdery things!  Bad, bad, bad!  And haters are absolutely welcome to hate on the murdering, lying, etc.  MDZS is a hyper-murdery fictional world and we have our faves in it and we have characters we hate.  (...though tbh the only character i really hate is jin guangshan, i love pretty much everyone else even when they’re hurting each other, and i get really sad when i feel like i’m somehow supposed to hate character A because i like conflicting character B. but to hell with jin guangshan. there’s someone on an actual power trip, both personal and political.)

But when I see people say “oh the problem is JGY’s ambitious” rather than “the problem is he does bad things to achieve his ambitions” I feel like that’s...argh, such a serious misreading of the fictional world itself?  His ambitions are completely in line with the ambitions of all the other main characters!  Being his father’s son.  Navigating a difficult political world.  Not getting beat up or murdered.  The one thing that really stands out in-world is the innovative watchtowers, which, like.  Okay it’s a centralization of power, which you can maybe argue has proved a detrimental drive in human history, but it’s for the purpose of improving the general quality of life for people outside the cultivator class.

Well. Then there’s the other thing that stands out in-world: the ambition to leave the social class he was born into.  In-world, that makes lots of people angry.  But also when I pick things apart as a reader, it starts to feel like that’s...kind of what readers are blaming him for when they complain that “his problem is ambition.”  And there you are back at “Meng Yao from the brothel should have known his place.” 

Which I genuinely don’t think people intend to say, I’m not trying to be all GOTCHA YOU’RE BEING CLASSIST.  That’s a kind of fandom rhetoric I find harmful and unproductive.  But like...what are you saying if you say it’s bad for Meng Yao to be ambitious, and not everyone else?

* remember this asterisk from way up at the readmore?  it’s to say ahaha i lied there are no problems with jin guangyao he’s a precious angel who does nothing wrong not even once and he can have a little kidnapping as a treat

[alltherelicsofalifelonglived]

i played amnesia: rebirth and i really liked it and have some Thoughts(tm):

non-spoilery:

- once again mad respect to frictional games for being the only people who arent afraid of nudity. no censorship underwear.

-theres a non-spook mode for if you hate being chased by stuff

- diversity win! this guy who's the most pathetic little meow meow is gay!

- i didn't have to look up any walkthroughs!

-i tried it with both spooks on and spook off and having spooks on is better. embrace the spook.

-game has some pretty visuals and a neat story, and while i wish choices throughout the game mattered, there are different endings. p good game.

SPOILERY BEYOND HERE(do readmores even work anymore):

[[MORE]]

-as a trans(tm) the first person pregnancy was uhhhhhhhh. dont like that. but that feeling didnt last long, mostly because tasi was so happy about having a baby. its cute.

-that being said i didn't want to run around and jump and climb because TASI UR PREGNANT STOP DOING THAT

-it felt so much less lonely than the other two, it was nice to have a list of people that you were trying to find and meet up with

- i like how yasmine still tried to help even though she was becoming a harvester, she's such a sweetie

- dr. metzier was so mean to tasi, like dude. even if tihana hadn't been the one to bring down the plane, and the one to curse everyone, tasi still would have been in the right to keep her baby. everyone died because tihana killed them. none of it would have happened if she had just minded her own buisness, but the doc was just. so angery at tasi?? dude.

-at the room full of harvesters i straight up opened the door, saw that, closed the door and turned around

- shadow seems like a manifestation of all the pain inflicted on the other world, like its the opposite of the vitae. could b wrong but thats just my onion.

- best ending is the fuck u lady ending even though the shadow eats you and your baby

-hhh i wanna know more about the other world politics, especially about people fighting against the empress

Opinions on characters(that actually speak more than like. 3 words.):

Hank- hands down best dude. total bro, i just wish he didn't die by being hanged by the cable when you use the elevator. that was a bit. mm. tasteless? tone deaf? maybe dont hang one of the two black characters frictional games??

Alex- *insert second diversity win joke about rich buisnessman having the saddest most pathetic little meow meow as a boyfriend*

Richard- quality representation for us useless gays. terrified little meow meow. on a more serious note, i clocked him and alex from the first photo, and im glad tasi confirms that they're in a relationship, and that when you find richard, he's calling out for alex. i really hoped that you'd be able to stop tasi by struggling, but not so. i think it would have made for a neat thing if you had a choice with both him and the doc.

Dr. Metzier - speaking of the doc, i did not see him stealing the baby coming. he's such a jerk for blaming tasi, "oh you'd put the lives of all of us behind that of your child" like no my dude. if someone locked you in a room and said they were going to start shooting people if you didn't give them your baby, you wouldn't be the one responsible for the people being shot.

Leon- might be the only person from the Cassandra to survive? ik he looses his hand but he's still alive after. thats gotta suck, bc he's stuck in the catacombs/hunting grounds with all the other harvesters, so he's probably going to loose himself. i feel bad for him even though he's Pretty Dang Racist, bc he didn't do or say anything outright until after being harvesterized, so i think that had things gone normally and everyone got to the gold mine ok, he might have been able to Stop Being So Racist.

Tasi- legit didn't touch the laudnum after i realized she was pregnant, only to discover there was no effect on her. she's a nice lady, sucks that the empress decided she wanted tasi's baby. "hold x to check in on your baby" is something im going to say now.

Salim- aww cute husband shame he's fuckin dead. i wasn't expecting to find him alive but i still got real sad when i did find him. i like the details that tell you your marriage licence got denied and the photo saying 'how about we do anyways'

Yasmin- even as a harvester she's friend shaped. even puts her leg in a bear trap bc she doesn't want to hurt tasi. 10/10 yasmin is best friend in this game

Empress Tihana - i don't believe for a second she really meant any of what she said about saving tasi from the desert because a, she's the one who brought down the plane, b, she's sustained by endless torturing and claims she's not a monster, so forgive me if i dont think she's being honest. c, the major hazards of this particular area of the desert are her harvesters, actually. the entire crew of the cassandra, the french fort, the village, all those people are dead because she wanted someone else's baby. love her design tho very cool.

[queerautism]

i dont think it was wrong of you to criticize it, but i do feel you were being too harsh about the smut thing. it really is not uncommon for minors to do that online, and its important to be firm but gentle when explaining why its wrong and could hurt them and others. like, harassing people and making up dangerous lies is NOT something a teen does because they "dont know any better", but being too open about their sexuality (not sexuality as in orientation ofc) online and posting nsfw works publicly is. a lot of teens dont understand the risks that come with that

i also dont think it helps to make that issue about sysmedicalism bc it doesnt really have anything to do with sysmed ideology other than the fact that its something one sysmed does that another accused you/criticized you for. i dont think it says much about the sysmed community as it does for specific people. Like yes def there are other legitimately hypocritical mindsets with sysmeds where they openly engage in and endorse behavior that they criticize from the other side, but that doesnt scream to me as an example of hypocrisy in the community. more a teenager doing something dumb, risky and somewhat insensitive.

i am *not* saying you cant be harsh about blurrysys' behavior towards you. it was shitty and any teenager is old enough to know better. i just think its important to not always conflate all sysmed interactions with each other, and to keep your anger limited to the issues that caused the anger and warrant it

i hope this makes sense? im not trying to be rude, to nitpick and criticize you for the sake of criticizing. im legit the same person who sent the long anons saying fuck being nice to sysmeds, so tone policing is far from something i have any interest in. i just wanted to share my feelings on this

No i get you, the hypocrisy thing is about what sysmeds will call out when they can use it against us, but will not even mention when it's one of them doing it.

Blurry-star-system was explained why it was wrong and dangerous, and how to do a readmore on mobile. It's not like I'm gonna keep bringing this up or hold it against them as long as it doesn't keep happening or whatever yknow

[chronusbled]

alright kiddos we doing things nice and simple here for now. pretty comes later. rules under readmore, starting muse list is here ♥ once i get more bios actually written out, will set up a proper page for them all 

sup? the name’s TAE and i’m 32 years old. this means there WILL be adult themes on my blog, but things will be properly tagged as  [TRIGGER] // or NSFW // as a general catchall. i try to cover the main triggers and topics, but if i miss anything please let me know and i’ll make sure to tag accordingly. this also means that i unfortunately work a full-time job that can take anywhere from 40 - however many hours they want out of my week thanks to mandatory overtime. i hate it but the check is fat. as such this blog is going to be considered low-activity but i tend to find myself lurking often.  THIS IS A PRIVATE MUTUALS ONLY BLOG. i made this blog to help reduce stress and anxiety from my old main blog, mush as i dearly love it. i will not interact with anybody i do not follow, and most of who i follow will be friends, friends of friends, or people i’m genuinely interested in writing with.  Also for my own mental health, I DO NOT DEAL WITH DRAMA. any hate sent will be deleted on sight and blocked if possible. i try my hardest to not hurt or offend anybody or cause people strain, i ask the same be done to me. i’m too old to be dealing with high school shenanigans again.  I’M A SHIPPING WHORE. legit. i can and WILL make ocs just to ship with some of my friends, platonically, familially, or romantically. idgaf. all my ocs are considered multiverse / multiship unless otherwise stated in their bios or in a pinned post i plan on making in the near future !! want to ship? i’ll have seven headcanons for them at the ready as soon as you express interest. this is a threat and a promise.  i tend to prefer chatting and plotting over discord for ease of access ( and because i can type on my phone while i’m working lol ) but i don’t mind dms and ims here! i’ll just be a bit slower. i’m also down to rp on discord if you are, though my replies do tend to be much shorter for a faster paced rp experience there, but if you’d like to do something heftier i can do my best to match length ♥  AS AN OC-MAIN BLOG, I’M VERY OC / CROSSOVER / FANDOM FRIENDLY. most of my ocs start(ed) in the rwby fandom, but can very easily be adapted to suit almost any verse / may already have a verse set for other fandoms of interest. just ask! if they don’t have a verse already, i can quickly whip one up if i’m familiar with the source material. drag me into your fandoms, i’m begging you. for those interested, my main fandoms are RWBY, GENSHIN IMPACT, RDO, and ORIGINAL LORE.  any graphics on my blog / google docs do not belong to me unless otherwise stated. however i DO often draw my ocs. pls dont rip my art apart for i am soft ;lkj i don’t mess with passwords so there isn’t one here, but if you’d like to show that you’ve gone through my rules please like this post. tysm and i hope you have a good day, my lovelies! ♥

[tropicalfreckles]

SPOILERS AHEAD FELLAS SONIC 2 SPOILERS (in a readmore cause im not a dick)

I made ugly gremlin sounds during the whole movie quietly and bounced in my chair like a fucking child

Every time Sonic, Tails and Knuckles did anything together I legit cried a little, guy this movie was fucking amazing and it had FUCKING SUPER SONIC. I gotta draw stuff from the movie, like Knuckles with Tails on his shoulder like ahhhHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH this movie was fucking amazing oh my god oh my god I really really really hope I get to see Chaos and Metal Sonic at some point in this franchise but I'm gonna lower my hopes a little cause idk what they have planned for the future. Also cause you know, no going in order hwich is FINE I just really really at the same time want my fav stuff ahjsdkfs

Also I love Rachel a lot I enjoyed her during her part in the film she was fucking hilarious/awesome, what a queen

This movie would've made kid me jump out of my chair in the theaters and cry out SONIC, it was so fucking fun

Hoping to see Rouge and Amy in the next film hhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

They did reveal something in the mid credits scene I will not say just so y'all can go enjoy it for yourself.

Once again I think I just died when I saw Super Sonic like IT'S SUPER SONIC GUYS WITH THE RED EYES AND EVERYTHING

Also I noticed the chaos emeralds like dipped out and are no longer in the Master Emerald sooooooo hunt for the emeralds next film???? MAYBE TORNADO 2????? HHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

I really really hope that if Rouge is in the movie they have it like SA2 when she's working for the government as a spy.

[ennui-gt]

Here it is. A Piece Of Borrower Content Written Entirely In Stream Of Consciousness:

AN: so this is incomplete and very…needs revisions to the timeline to incorporate some things I added later! It’s the original universe that Mira’s from! I edited it like Slightly to just change Ross’s name to Ross (if u see Max anywhere that’s his old one I just felt like changing it so that’s just him but different. Anyway) Everything's under the readmore tab, cheers!

The Library Fairy:

-

Basic Plot (Chrono, comic starts from human perspective abt the ‘legend of the library fairy’ ig maybe. Nothing here is permanent cept the characterization)

Part A

1- Mira is borrower currently chillin in a college library

2- She lives off of the cafe on the second floor nd reads lots and lots of stuff about everything when the upper floors close (lower floor open 24/7 but upper floors r vacant p much after 12:00 AM)

3- she starts getting increasingly curious about human stuff cos she’s literate nd books r pry neat

4- it starts one night when she spots an unattended notebook and a half eaten blueberry muffin, nd it’s 12:30 so nobody’s coming back in atm (it’s the 80s so no laptops for the plebians quite yet)

5- so she goes ‘welp’ nd takes part of the muffin, then sees the work on the page and goes ‘hmmmm this is incorrect’ so she helps our and leaves notes here n there to point the kid in the right direction and puts down some book refs for further study bcos at this point she’s been there for 2 years and she knows where most things are

6- she stays behind to see if the human comes back for it, hidden in a hidey hole near the desk

7- human comes in, sees notebook, practically melts w relief nd stuffs it in his bag

8- next day human comes back nd leaves nother notebook and a cookie, along w a hidden camera

9- Mira goes ‘o boy, this a trap, innit’

10- Mira then decides ‘eh whatever I haven’t had contact w anyone in years now so I might as well’

11- she steals the camera film nd leaves a lil scrap of paper saying ‘nice try ;)’ on it

12- student comes back, sees paper, goes ‘dammit’, then leaves note addressed to the ‘library fairy’ and another cookie, as well as more of their work for her to help with

13- bout a decade goes by and now the “Library Fairy” is an urban myth, it’s currently 2003 so she’s also wound up on the school’s unofficial Wikipedia page under ‘local cryptids’

14- most library employees know of her but they don’t go looking out of fear stemming from superstitions bout her, somehow the legend grew from ‘can’t be photographed’ to ‘a student once saw her and died that day’

15- there’s now a small shrine devoted to her where ppl bring offerings hoping to get good grades in return, sometimes they will leave papers for her to proofread nd stuff

16- new prof (named Alexei) finds online article thinks he Knows What’s Up bcos he had a borrower friend as a kid, but they left when borrower’s fam found out about them knowing each other

17- he leaves note wedged in one of her secret entrances behind outlet, asking if she can meet w him at some point

18- Mira, already In it, goes ‘Okay. Alright. This has gone on for long enough. Time to go and never return’ but ofc she’s curious as all hell and like she decides she will at least honor the guy’s request for a convo b4 she goes, but on her terms and w/o speaking face 2 face

19- they Talk in the library after hours, bcos he paid off the janitor to let him stay after hours nd most of the student employees recognize him as a prof nd leave him alone

20- they talk again for every subsequent night

21- she uhhhh finally decides to reveal herself nd prays that her hunch was right nd he won’t try to grab her or anything

22- he doesn’t but she’s nervous so she winds up gettin caught in her own climbing rope like idiot, is now dangling from ceiling in tangled mess

23- he stifles chuckle nd she says smthn sarcastic

24- he moves closer and offers to untangle her

25- she’s like ‘please’

26- so he do, but her grip on the rope slips nd he has to catch her

26- so now she’s in his hand and he just sets her down and now he’s a bumbling embarrassed mess bcos he said he wasn’t going to hold her and he just did and o dear pls forgib him

28- nd she’s like ‘dude u just saved my life it’s fine ur fine chill’

29- internally she’s going HOLY FUCK AAAAAAA but externally, her human’s already worked up enough as it is so she’s gotta b the level headed one

29.5- after a while they both kinda get used to each other more, he gets tenure, they celebrate, some more stuff happens, Aleksei got married (not to Mira, Mira hasn’t actually rly thought about being in a relationship w anyone cos she’s laser focused on gaining as much knowledge as possible)

30- eventually Alexei’s like ‘hey so I’m dean of faculty for the biotech branch now uhhhh would u like actual job teaching students? Cos, uh, you can do it remotely thru online lectures n stuff, no in person interaction, and I uh was just kinda wondering—‘

31- she’s like ‘yes. Yes!!! LET ME HELP PEOPLE OFFICIALLY KINDA’

32- so now she’s a professor, and has revealed her Secret a few times here n there to a number of the faculty, nd she has recorded her own findings in a personal journal

33- ‘humans will treat u like a human if they think ur human first. The kids call it ‘catfishing’’

34- enter Ross, an mall goth who accidentally tripped headfirst into a premed program

35- Mira’s favorite field of study is bio so naturally she’s his prof for a majority of his classes

36- being the good boy that he is, he now knows Mira’s secret. There is an Entire Chapter on him finding out and legit just continuing their conversation as if everything was normal bcos he thought that was how he was supposed to handle the situation

37- then she says ‘u can ask questions, u know’ he’s like OH THANK FUCK CAUSE I HAVE SEVEN HUNDRED OF THOSE

38- and now he kinda knows what to look for in terms of ‘do borrowers live here check yes or no’

39-in his apartment, the answer is yes and he mistakenly kinda stumbles upon the mom one night when he wakes up in the middle of the night for Snack and opts to pretend like its not happening. Unfortunately the thing she was trying 2 borrow (piece of crumb cake for Son Boy’s birthday) is the thing he wants 2 eat so he’s like “uh. ‘Scuse me, ma’am.” and he peels back the saran wrap on the other side of the plate, takes piece, nd then leaves some there for her

40-so now the woman is like ‘welp guess it time 2 Leave’

.1- she and husband Talk

.2-they decide it best 2 go

.3-theyre Packing

.4-lil bab Ellie confused

.5-hawk attacke

.6-cut to Ross

41- Ross also happens to work at a bar and he goes outside for a break

43- he finds smal child—smol smal—on the sidewalk and said child is missing an arm, nd has lost a lot of blood, so he’s uhhhhh Losing It highkey

43.5-parents r nowhere 2 b seen, but the hawk is nearby and circling. Ross gets an idea of what just happened

44- he up and leaves work, thankfully his apartment is above the shop so he jumps up the fire escape w the child and

45- he make tourniquet

46- he calls Mira nd asks her 2 come over to ASAP. he’s A Mess at this point

47- it is Very touch and go, kid needs blood, Mira is the only viable donor so she’s just gotta pray that the blood type is fine and won’t kill him

48- and then eventually they manage 2 stave infection thru antibiotics properly dosed to his size, Mira does Math and Prays basically

49- ‘bout a month in, kid wakes up

50- kid doesn’t rember much since he’s only 3

51- hes v scared of Ross at first but over time he gets used 2 the human

52- kid (elliot) starts 2 call Ross ‘dad’ after a while

53- Ross: *internal screaming but in a good way*

54- the end kinda for now

Part 2

A- New Borrowers In The Building

—three of em. paranoid dad, mom, nd daughter that’s Elliot’s age so he’s pumped

B- Elliot offers them a place 2 stay briefly

C- he knows by now bout like, how borrowers don’t typically interact w humans and Auntie Mira’s a bit of a weird case so he just doesn’t tell em bout his dad being the human

D- the kid finds out first nd doesn’t tell the parents, but they figure it out later kinda and think that it’s a ‘o god he’s being kept as a pet’ sitch so they’re >:| abt it

E- they move out and try to take Elliot w them (by force bcos they think he’s brainwashed) but he escapes and makes it to Ross, who’s like “uhhhhhh”

F- and the mom come out the hole near the counter n starts yelling at Ross, who is…kinda used to it since Mira brings in ppl who need help from time 2 time and they typically don’t react well when they’re lucid enough to understand what’s going on. He’s just not used to being questioned about his own kid

G- so they’re like “WHAT DO YOU THINK YOU’RE DOING WITH HIM”

H- and he’s like “r…raising him???”

I- and Ellie steps up and he’s like “this is my dad. I decided he was my dad when I was three. He’s being a good parent”

J- and Ross is like “yeah what he said. I’m a good parent.”

K- Ross is riding that high til the end of fucking time but like back to the story at hand

L- this is when the husband comes out nd is like “lissen. wifey. ily but that is a very big human and he hasn’t grabbed us yet so let’s count our blessings and gtfo”

M- but she’s like “uh no we stay until I’m sure Elliot is Safe and fucking Sound”

N- so they stay for dinner nd stick around a little longer.

O- Val (the kid) gets closer 2 Elliot and also Ross a bit

P- Mira shows once or twice, first time she shows up they’re like “oh god it’s the crazy doctor lady this all makes sense now” (bcos Mira does check up on as many borrower families as possible in her free time so word has got around by now Of her, and the number by which to contact her in case her services r needed)

Q- After a month or so, then they decide to leave bcos they’re like “look we get that ur son is ur son and he only has one arm and in our profession that is kind of a death sentence but we can’t have our kid getting used to dealing w humans who know about our existence” so they go and leave on a kind of sour note bcos Ellie can do anything he wants to do just as well as any other borrower Thank You Very Much and Ross is ready to fite anyone who thinks otherwise

R- Elliot starts trying 2 b more independent, basically from now on he’s like ‘I can do everything my Damn Self Thanks’

S- but uh he does it to a point where he’s going out of the way to endanger himself

T- so they get into a fite about it and ross Yells and Elliot is like ‘kthxbye’

U- and the boi just. Fuckin bolts. Runs Away. Ross is a Mess, he starts smoking again (he quit cold turkey the day he took Elliot in) to curb the depression, he’s jus. Not doin good, worried that his son is dead and the last time they talked it’d ended badly

V- FREEDOM!!!1! Except Ellie doesn’t kno how to take care of himself so it’s a rough month or so and then he runs into some other borrowers livin in their own town in the wild ig, chillin, being hella independent, and he’s like “uh yes ofc I will join u, I was w my dad for a while but.........” he neither confirms nor denies that his dad’s dead but everyone kinda just assumes.

Part 3

W-anyway a year goes by and then the borrower group gets hit hard w some kind of sickness ig. Elliot gets it too he’s basically incapacitated n drifting in and out of lucidity. So. They contact the weird crazy doctor lady who hangs around humans, a.k.a. Mira, and she’s like “oh. fuck. I know this kid.” bcos she does, u kno, and she jus treats em all for their ailment and shows them how to make antibiotic poultice thing in case smthn like it happens again. Mold. Penicillin is basically what it is

X-she and Elliot hav a Chat (Mira basically yells at him a lot) once he’s fixed up and he decides he’s gonna visit his dad but he makes it very clear that he is a Grown Up (he’s not, he’s literally sixteen), and he is living on his own now

Y- he agrees to stay for a week tho since he misses his home a lot tbh and Ross is just. Over the fucking moon to know he’s ALIVE, he’s not gonna fuck up their relationship by insisting that he stay. Or like, by keeping him ofc he would never

Z- unfortunately the borrower community put two and two together and figured out his dad’s human so they have his stuff packed up when he gets back w mira, who’s ready to go the fuck off on them

End 1:

-Ellie is living at Ross’s place atm and hopeful about the future basically. He eventually will go off on his own but he’ll keep in contact w his dad and stuff

Part C.5

55- few yrs later

56- elliot is Adult now he does adult borrower stuff

57- he moves out

58- finds nice borrower gf (her name’s Tess)

59- doesn’t tell her about his dad being human but talks about his dad a LOT

60- so when she asks to meet said father he’s just like “uh. Maybe we don’t do that actually”

61- and she’s like “y tho”

62- and he’s like “bcos”

63- anyway she decides to look into it cos she knows he goes to see his dad nd keep in touch but his dad is allegedly “a recluse who lives in the big scary human’s walls to avoid other ppl”

64- which is. Not true in the slightest tbqh he’s def not an introvert he’s just a workaholic and he Is the big scary human

65- anywho they run into Val and her wife and she’s like “how’s Ross been?” And Elliot is acting Very Suspish so she, being Smart, calls it immediately and is like “oh shit u haven’t told her yet have u”

66- Tess: “told me what”

67- Val: “El’s dad is a human, bro.”

68- Tess: “I’m sorry?”

69- this results in a Big Fight and they separate for like, a month. Elliot blames Val bcos he’s being irrational and doesn’t wanna admit to the fact that lying to his girlfriend for over a year was Real Bad Actually, but over time he’s like ‘yeah it’s my fault sry for snapping at u’ cos he works thru his emotions n stuff

70- Eventually gf comes back cos she’s like “ok so. I understand why you lied to me about your dad. It was a dick move but I do get it and I still care about you a lot. I would like. To meet him.”

80- this is a lie she does not want to meet him she is doing this bcos she does not want to lose Elliot and that outweighs the fear of his dad

81- so they go to meet him but she’s just kinda. Behind the wall at first like “that’s a crazy big human this is crazy ur crazy it’s time to gO”

82- Val is also there bcos she hasn’t seen Ross in a while

83- they eventually coax her out of hiding

84- and by that I mean Val picks her up and drags her out into the open by force bcos she basically freezes up the second she catches sight of Ross and Val’s like “u didn’t come all this way for nothing, bich”

85- they have a Painfully Awkward First Meeting, Tess is trying her best but oh god he’s just too fucking. Larg. Ellie ur dad too big

86- tbh tho the ice kinda breaks after Ellie and Ross get into a fight over smthn stupid (im thinking Elliot grumbles bout Ross’s hair being unruly and he’s worried that mira’s using it like a personal storage system again and Ross is like “I’ve been keeping better track of that actually” and then like a little line of paper clips and a few hand-bound notebooks tied together w some string fall out of his fucking mane and he’s like “I can explain”

87- “dad you can’t keep letting her use your hair like a fucking NEST”

88- Tess is laughing now cos god damn this was not what she was expecting

89- that’s it the end it ends w Tess laughing at them being idiots good times r had by all

Uhhhh that’s it so far. I have More but it’s kinda jumbled rn and I need to fit stuff in places. Anyway.

[burlesque-articulation]

Alright, I pulled out my corkboard and red string again, this time in hopes of dissecting the MAG timeline to see if there is anything there to support my fan theory of:

~Could Jurgen Leitner be Martin’s Dad~

And so far, signs point to a solid "it could be possible”. So in lieu of this, I will be presenting all my evidence with exceptional bias so it better illustrates my desired outcome. Okay? Okay! Let’s get into it.

Let’s begin with 1985, when Jurgen Leitner supposedly begins renting an office in Pall Mall, central London. Presumably this is just where he sets up an office, and not the actual location of the Library, which isn’t something we get-- anyways, getting sidetracked, uhhh.

Right, we know, vaguely, that Martin was born in 1987, two years after Leitner would have set up shop in Central London; and interestingly enough, in that same year of Martin’s birth, Leitner attempted to hire some people to dig a big ol’ hole in the floor of his office to lead into the tunnels built beneath the building. And this could just be wishful thinking, but I believe it is implied that these tunnels connect to the other tunnels of Millbank Prison. Interconnected, and with many exits leading to various parts of the city. Basically, a needlessly intricate means of escape (I guess balconies and back doors just didn’t exist yet, you know) should shit get real. Anyways, the point I’m trying to make, is that it would make sense for Leitner to suddenly be very interested in having direct access to these tunnels from his main office after receiving news that he’s a father, or whatever. Or maybe it’s just because he’s always been a loser that loves vibing in tunnels.

[Obligatory readmore, because this shit gets long, and even more ramble-y. Also I’m not sorry, because y’all are more than welcome to continue scrolling past this mess]

Alright, now fast-forward to 1994, the destruction of the Library. At this point in time, Martin would have been 7. Now hold up! According to the Magnus Archives Wiki, Martin’s father abandoned the family when he was 8 or 9; so isn’t that a whole in the theory right there? No. It’s not. Because the only thing that is implied about Leitner around 1994, is that he went into hiding after the destruction of the Library. At no point is it implied that he even left the country (or even London, but like, I refuse to believe he’s that stupid; even if that alternative is hilarious). To set up my point, I’m going to shift the focus onto Martin now, and what his life might have been like when he was younger.

So, by present events (present actually referring to like, pre-season 4, actually), Martin’s mother is in a care home in Devon. Could be because care homes are cheaper there, or something, I have no idea. Honestly people in my family don’t live long enough to ever even consider this option, so I don’t know how assisted living works at all lmao. But let’s say, for simplicities sake, that Martin actually just grew up around Devon; and I’m throwing a dart at a map and declaring Plymouth as the city he grew up in. Anyways, why does this matter? Because I do in fact believe that Leitner is stupid enough to think that changing which county he lives in counts as being in hiding. And he gets maybe one (1) good summer with his family before the weight of his sins bare down on him, and he realizes that staying in one place really isn’t an option. So maybe he tries travelling around a bit; but inevitably he always ends up coming back to Plymouth. It takes him a year, maybe two, to finally realize that this won’t work forever. His habits are too predictable, and what’s this? The mother of his child is getting sick; and her condition only seems to worsen over time (you know, like how it usually works when someone is taken ill.); and Leitner gets it into his head that he could be the cause of it; so what is the safest course of action, but to completely abandon his family? Surely things will turn out for the better for them all if he were to just... disappear. To cut ties entirely, so as to make sure no one ever comes after them in an attempt to get to him.

And that worked out fucking great, didn’t it.

Bunch of unimportant stuff happens, and eventually Martin ends up dropping out of school, presumably only a year early from graduation (weird but fine); and it’s safe to assume he eventually ends up traveling to London in hopes of better job opportunities. Plus, if he’s gonna be lying on his CV, probably better to head out of county to some place where no one knows him from anywhere to begin with, right? That makes sense, and none of you can say otherwise.

And where does he find himself sliding into a new job position? Oh, that’s right; at the Magnus Institute. In the Library. I’m just saying. I am just saying, that’s a little interesting. I mean, he lied about having a degree in parapsychology on his CV; so if Bouchard really wanted to play along like he thought the CV was entirely legit, it actually would’ve made more sense to put him in Research, or even in Artefact Storage with a degree like that. But nope, Bouchard put him in the Library. Though, I guess we don’t know exactly what all might’ve been on Martin’s faked CV. But I swear to god, if we get bonus content that’s just Martin’s faked CV and it even hints at him working at a “family library/bookshop” I will spontaneously combust.

Regardless, in 2009, supposedly (according to the wiki), Martin began working at the Institute. Personally, I always thought he started working there in 2010, but that doesn’t matter. I actually like 2009 better, because then a year later, Leitner apparently begins working with Gertrude Robinson. Which I find interesting. I mean, really there’s no reason for them not to work together, I just find the timing of it interesting. Of course, Leitner (in MAG80) alludes to the fact that Gertrude was likely only working with him because there was a lack of anyone else around. But that really only explains Gertrude’s interest in Leitner. What attracted Leitner to the Magnus Institute in the first place, I wonder? Aside from the fact that it’s essentially the Library of Alexandria of research on the Entities. 

But Leitner had managed to stay out of public eye for about 16 years, why would he chose right around then to start playing peekaboo with the Beholding? Rhetorical question, of course. Y’all should already know exactly where I’m going with this line of questioning. Martin. Martin is what lead Leitner to the Institute, and to Gertrude. Dude just wanted to check up on his son, and now he’s just as trapped as everyone who works for the damn Institute because of all these weird rituals and shit. Plus maybe there was another reason why Leitner went through so much effort to help Gertrude, even putting himself on the line for it; and I think we can all agree that Leitner is a pretty selfish dude who’s only real character trait is being like a fucking cockroach. Straight up, the only way to kill a cockroach is to beat those suckers until they pop like a fucking pimple-- sorry, I’m actually getting ahead of myself, I don’t want to talk about that yet, um.

Leitner’s biggest character trait, and on some level, character flaw, is his Self-Preservation instinct. When the going gets tough, his own health and safety comes first. But maybe he gets a bit sentimental in his old age, and maybe he struck a deal with Gertrude; if he helps her stop the Unknowing, (or actually I think it would’ve been the Dark’s ritual first), she will bring his son down to the tunnels so Leitner can see how he’s grown, and maybe even talk to him. I just think that would be interesting character motivation; because at the end of the day, it’s still a pretty selfish motivation. But at this point, Gertrude’s only other option for help is a teenaged Shadow the Hedgehog wannabe; so she’d likely agree to just about anything for the extra pair of hands. And given what later happens in regards to the Dark’s ritual, which then results in Gertrude’s death; Leitner gets scared back into his hole in the ground.

But hey, I guess things actually kind of worked out for ol’ Jurgen. Because like a year later, his son* (*allegedly, according to apparently no one but me) starts living in the Archives. It’s like he’s living in his son’s basement, he can just pop up for tea and say hi whenever. Maybe complain about all the bugs that keep crawling around. Or not, because Jürgen Leitner is a coward. But I 100% would not put it past him to shuffle his old bones up into the Archives to stand creepily at the edge of wherever Martin was sleeping and angst quietly at the sight of his son. It’s creepy, funny, and sad. Basically a peak TMA scenario right there.

Then Leitner gets brutally piped by Bouchard. Actually, can I say it like that? “Piped” isn’t some kind of... new-age slang for something, is it? God, I hope not. Anyways; Leitner isn’t just beat upside the head with a length of pipe, but literally pulped by Bouchard (or at the very least implied so), in a way that makes identifying the guy difficult enough that he remains a John Doe straight up until Elias confesses to the murder. Now, obviously there are plenty of reasons for this; given that both Daisy and Basira are familiar with the name Leitner, so presumably other sectioned officers would be as well; so there was at least a slim chance that whatever officer got sent to the Institute upon the discovery of the body might just recognize Leitner immediately. But, and sorry to sidetrack here, but there was just one thing that really stood out to me about Martin. One thing that always stuck with me, that for some reason was the main thing that made me thing Leitner could’ve been his dad.

Martin looks like his father, whoever that may or may not be. It is explicitly canon, that Martin looks like whoever his dad is. So wouldn’t it be better safe than sorry for Bouchard to beat Leitner to a pulp wherein no one could easily discern any major features of him once he was found. After all, it would make things rather messy and a bit too complicated if everyone who saw the body was like, “wow! That looks just like you, Martin.” So really, it’s for the best that not only did Bouchard kill Leitner, but he thoroughly did so. 

And so, I will end this already way to long of a ramble with the one thing that solidified me on this theory, and Spoilers for Season 5 of MAG, but... In MAG181 Salesa says, “Now you mention it, you actually remind me of Jurgen a bit. In his younger days of course.” to Martin. Of course, Martin did just shoot out a snappy one-liner about books, but... it’s the clarification of Jurgen “in his younger days”, that gets me. Mikaele could just have easily said something about Martin just “sounding” like Leitner. But the way this reads, and how it’s spoken, even, it seems more like someone that might’ve been looking at Martin for awhile, squinting at him as if he’s seen that face somewhere before, and then right when Martin mentions books, it finally clicks. After all, it would’ve been almost 20 years, or possibly more, since Salesa would have left Leitner’s employ.

So yeah, I admit this theory has a much weaker backbone then my Banks/Folger post, but... I just think it’s neat. And it’s another one of those things that actually doesn’t have any affect on the major plot whatsoever. I dunno, maybe it was meant to be some sort of subplot early on that got ditched or something? Point is, that’s all for now, and with any luck, I will never post another crack theory again, and the TMA tag can be safe from my ramblings once more.

[ijustwantagoodurl]

Venting rn :( hoping this readmore trick works gang

IM. THE AUDACITY. LOOK IM . THE??????

AU D A CITY???? OF IT ALL???? IM TRYING TO NOT FUCKING FAIL MY CLASSES W.HY NOW .WHY . hurhufr I just HAPPEN to be in town bc yr ex step dad is a COWARD and needed his MOMMY to step in with his divorce . ARE YOU INSANE. ARE . IS THIS LIKE. LEGIT???? can we have tea . Can I bring u a little gift . YOUR SON GOT DIVORCED YESTERDAY AND YOURE LEAVING ME A GIFT??? ALSO LIKE. COUKR SHE USE EVIDENCE OF THE PORCH BEING DIRTY IN COURT?? SHE SHOULDNT HAVE EVEN BEEN THERE. I????? this is on. SO MANY LEVELS. n o t my fucking problem but here go these bitches knowing that I have to maintain peace no matter What the Fuck Happens cause we're gonna be family again someday like. What kind of . "Hahah I havent texted u in months but on this, the day your parents are getting divorced, is the best day for me to reach out and see if u read this book." MAN YOURE COOL AND KIND BUT THIS SHIT IS SO 🤢 🤮 "lemme drop yr little gift on the porch" DONT GET NEAR OUR HOUSE. BRO. BE REASONABLE YOU LOST IT IN COURT YESTERDAY. CH ILL. STEP . OFF!!!!!!!

WHY DOES THE LORD TEST ME SO!!!!!

[capsgirl19]

wait I wanna hear about the gay subtext and wasted potential of teen beach 2

Okay, strap in because I don’t do elevator pitches. Major spoilers for Teen Beach Movies 1&2. And a readmore because this is LONG!

SO. Idk if this is a common observation, but it seemed fairly obvious to me that Lela fell hard in love with Mack over the course of the first movie. She felt trapped by gender roles, obligated to pursue a relationship with a boy over and over again, never even considering that there might be something more until this girl unlike anyone she’s ever met crashes into her life saying that she can do anything men can do, that she doesn’t have to fit into a little box. I legit thought the scene in her bedroom might be her confessing to being gay, though I knew it wouldn’t be. And like... the necklace exchange? The extended hug at the end? Not to mention in the second one, she’s desperate to escape her own universe so she can be with Mack again, desperate to live in a world where she’s allowed to be her true self. The fact that Brady turns into a garbage fire in that one doesn’t help my opinions on the canon pairings, either. By all rights, Lela’s story in the second movie ought to be a tragedy. She escapes a world defined by rigid expectations that she be in a relationship with a man to get back to the girl who changed her life. And she makes it! And she’s happy! And then it turns out everyone she loves will die if she doesn’t go back to her own life. She makes this tremendous sacrifice to save her entire universe, and honestly a sad gay story is cliche, but imo better than doing what they actually did with that ending.

As a little aside, can we talk about the unbelievable amount of lip service in these movies that the second one undermines with its entire plot? In the first movie Brady was kinda dumb, but a seemingly good boyfriend. Mack was so about Girl Power that she was trying to bring third wave feminism to the early sixties. In the second one Brady is sulky, jealous for no reason, dumps his girlfriend because HIS TRASH ASS fucking forgot they had plans, and never even has to apologize for it. On the contrary, Mack apologizes to HIM! When she never did anything to so much as suggest she’d find his interests stupid! I digress, sorry, it pissed me off to no end.

That finished, let’s get into the meta. While I don’t think the writers realized it, they wrote a super interesting multiverse. We’ve got the prime universe, the one Mack and Brady are from, which is the one all the others spawn from. My theory is that literally anyone can create a universe by writing about one. The intricacy of the created universe is based on how much worldbuilding goes into it, and the better thought-out the universe, the stronger the fabric of reality surrounding it will be, and the harder it’ll be to change from its intended path. This isn’t a new concept, but there’s an interesting level of equity in the fact that secondary universes can rewrite the entire timeline of the primary one if they change enough. But I’m getting ahead of myself. Wet Side Story is a sleepy little universe, not much thought put into how it runs at all. The characters sing and dance their way through the same summer over and over again in a contented daze, like the lotus eaters of the Odyssey. And then along come Mack and Brady, to stretch at the delicate chiffon of this simple place. The characters closest to them begin to stir from their trances, and there’s no way to go back. No way to unknow. Only an endless summer, a stretching eternity of pretending, and Lela can’t stand it. With barely a few months between, she’s pulling that fabric in the opposite direction trying to get back to the girl who captured her mind and her heart, currently in a failing relationship. And then she has to go back. She doesn’t want to. Mack seems to wish she could stay, if only for Lela’s own sake. She and Tanner return to their own universe, but not before Mack tells her that she can control her own destiny and shape her universe to her whims. Lela takes this to heart, becoming the solo star of the film. It’s too much. The thin fabric separating her universe from the primary one tears as she severely alters its timeline, allowing her to throw Mack a leather jacket matching her own through a movie screen, and shoot her a sly wink as she dances along to the movie. This is the end of Teen Beach 2, and oh boy, do I have sequel ideas.

Here’s the setup: so. Lela goes home. Whoever wrote the movie she’s in has long since abandoned caring for the universe they never bothered to build a world for, and their grip is weak. It’s easy to wrest the pen from that loose hand, to bend her world around her until it suits her desires, and she writes a great story. But it still feels empty. Lela is the queen of the beach, but her friends still seem their happiest playing their new roles, over and over again. She ascends to godhood, taking the reins of her own universe, but it’s lonely at the top and she’s as high as a person can go. She is peerless. She has nothing but time to ponder the nature of everything, and to yearn for the only equal she ever had.

The final film doesn’t open with her, though, and this one’s a fuckin’ doozy. Think Infinity War (the comic, not the movie, and maybe a little bit of Marvel’s Illuminati plotline too) meets a lesbian pulp novel. It opens with Mack, a few years later, now in college studying oceanography. Things keep sort of... glitching out. The camera pans past a character or scene from Lela, Queen of the Beach, or maybe even Wet Side Story, but when Mack looks back at it it’s always normal again. She decides she’s being silly, and it’s just been awhile since she watched her favorite movie, so that night she makes some time and puts it on. Lela herself steps out of the screen after one of her numbers and restores Mack’s memories of the timeline that got dead-ended by Lela’s alteration of her own universe. Mack is thrilled to see her after so long, and they hug, Mack explaining what she’s been doing in the time they’ve been apart. For Lela, it’s only been a year, and she never aged to begin with. Lela tells Mack how she took her advice, she changed her movie, but things were still so unbearably lonely. She tells her that whoever created their multiverse is cruel, that they had no regard for the people within, but that it’s alright. Lela knows how to handle indifferent creators, after all. She’s going to merge it all into one universe, no hierarchies, that she personally will oversee. She’s come to ask Mack to rule at her side.

Mack is afraid of her power and afraid of her ideas. She tries to talk Lela out of it, but to no avail. Lela is deeply sad that Mack doesn’t see things her way, but out of love for the other girl and a genuine belief that she’s too powerful to be stopped, once again forging her own destiny, she folds the necklace into Mack’s palm and returns to her own universe to continue her work.

Mack and Brady went their separate ways after high school, not on bad terms, but because a long-distance relationship didn’t seem realistic. This is the first time they’ve spoken since she left for college, but Brady is her only hope for someone who might understand. She manages to jog his memory, and they have to work together to try and prevent Lela from remaking all of creation. There are posters throughout which serve as markers of how close she is to achieving her goals, shifting gradually closer to their final form: Lela in iconic pink jacket leaning against the side of a motorcycle on a black-sand beach, a galactic sky behind her. The title reads, “LELA: QUEEN OF THE MULTIVERSE.” This is also the working title of the third movie.

Aaaaaaaaaaaaaand that’s all I got! How does it end? I don’t know! Probably Lela doesn’t merge the multiverse into one place, because that’s never a great plan. Maybe she just gets to live in Mack’s universe and go to college and find a girlfriend and have a good life? And her movie’s about Tanner and Bucky now (bc holy god there’s not as much of a story there but Tanner is fucking gay as hell), but it has the same story as the original? That might be good. Could also be called “Mack and Brady Save the Multiverse” idk.

[riddlerosehearts]

okay, i’m on my way home from AWA and i’ve finally had time to actually look into overwatch 2 and collect my thoughts, so here goes... this is gonna get far too long and essentially be a big essay that i know most people won’t care about, but i just really wanna get my thoughts out so i’ll drop it under a readmore! also be warned that if you‘re super into the new character designs you won’t be into part of this post, lol. but anyway:

first off, i think a lot of the discourse i’ve seen about it seems... overblown and based on inaccurate info?? (don’t worry i am not talking about hong kong here, people are absolutely justified in hating blizzard for that and so do i). people keep acting like they’re gonna charge $60 just for new maps or something but for one thing no price or release date has been announced (in fact, the dev team doesn’t even know when it will release and it’s been said that we may have to wait until 2020 for a date, because it’s still early in development), and for another thing overwatch 1 wasn’t even $60 on pc at launch?? yes on console it was which sucks but most of the playerbase is on pc, and the base game was $40 at launch for us. blizzard cannot be so colossally stupid that they’d charge more for this than for the base game, and if they do i’ll absolutely be complaining about it, but for now we literally have no clue how much the cost for OW2 will be.

and on top of that, it’s... not just new maps? it’s new maps, yes, but also multiple new heroes at launch, a whole new PvP mode, a PvE story mode which is something people have begging for to move the lore forward, a new updated engine, and the PvE will have its own maps and brand new abilities and skill trees—with the abilities and skill trees being unlike anything overwatch has done before, and uniquely exclusive to OW2 and not affecting the PvP so you’re not unfairly disadvantaged if you don’t have OW2—and i also feel the need to reiterate that it’s still in early development so i highly doubt we already know all there is to know. blizzard hasn’t been entirely clear on what overwatch 2 even is tbh but it’s certainly not just new maps and if you think it is then i’m actually begging you to spend at least 30 seconds on google because 30 seconds is really all you need to click on one article and see that that’s far from the truth.

also if you’re not interested in the lore then from what i’m gathering you don’t even need to buy it because apparently OW1 is getting all the same stuff except for that? like, people are saying blizzard should just release it all as free content, but apparently they almost are since the new “push” game mode, plus the map that comes with it (and any future ones) is coming to OW1 and it’s gonna keep getting all the hero updates and everything that isn’t exclusive to the PvE mode and players will be put into the same PvP lobbies across games?? correct me if i’m wrong on that but it sounds like if you already own OW1 and don’t want the story mode stuff you literally don’t need to buy OW2 at all—so if you do then you’re just buying the story mode/PvE stuff, that’s it. and if you do, every cosmetic item you already own will transfer over! it’s also not like OW1 is done updating, as we know we can still expect new heroes in it before OW2 releases.

don’t get me wrong, i am a bit worried that the amount of new content won’t be enough to justify the price, i do still hate blizzard for the entire hong kong controversy and desperately wish they would do better, and as a massive lore enthusiast and someone whose primary reason for loving overwatch is based in its characters and world i am very frustrated that this is what it takes for the story to actually move forward, but i’m also really excited to see where this all goes and i honestly think people are largely just complaining without actually looking into what they’re complaining about. i also literally don’t understand the idea that “lol overwatch already had this for like a week before they took it out” about the PvE stuff and would like someone to explain that to me if possible because i’ve been playing this game since very shortly after launch and i’m confused asjdjdnfkd

that all being said i do have what i’m guessing is a pretty unpopular opinion though, and it’s that i... i don’t like most of the character redesigns we’ve seen, and the ones i do like i mostly just kinda like, i don’t love them or feel excited about them, while the rest i’m neutral toward or hate, and that actually really upsets me because the ones i hate most are for two of my most favorite characters and it makes me worried for what they might’ve done to redesign and potentially mess up my other faves—but i guess these will be the designs going forward, and everybody’s pretty fanart is gonna have these designs, so i’ll just have to get used to them.

to be more specific on that last point: i absolutely hate lucio and mercy’s hair and i’m honestly really sad about that, especially since i run a mercy appreciation blog and i don’t wanna celebrate her new design on it because i hate it so that would be very insincere of me but i don’t wanna say negative things and complain on it either, but i just think her hair looks so strange now. and i like lucio’s outfit tbh but his weird neon glowstick hair just... ruins it, it looks so bad to me i can’t stand it and i want his regular hair back. i would honestly prefer not to even acknowledge these 2 designs (well, mostly the hair i guess) exist if i could help it. i also don’t like reinhardt’s beard or bun although i am glad to see his face exposed and like the lion on his armor, and i can see his new hair possibly growing on me eventually. and while mei’s design is mostly okay i loved her old hairpin, it was distinctive and cute and i’m sad it’s gone because i dislike whatever it is that’s in her hair now sjdjdkgkd. also before seeing a side by side comparison i legit had to ask a friend if anything was even different about winston or if i was just blind—which i guess, considering how i feel about the others, is a good thing for me lol. but if you like all these designs that’s valid and i’m happy for you!! just don’t expect to see me praising them, but i’m also not gonna be super negative like this too often either.

for kinda-positives: i actually do really enjoy one single new design though, and it’s genji’s, but not for any specific reason other than i’m excited that he’s finally wearing clothes lol. i don’t feel strongly either way about the design of the clothes themselves (...though i do lowkey agree with the people saying they’re boring looking, but hey, my man is finally done running around naked everywhere, so i’ll take it). and i like tracer’s new glasses and the fact that she ditched the crocs finally!! i’d also like to talk a bit more about mei’s design—a friend of mine is saying people are complaining they slimmed her down, and i haven’t seen any of that for myself but if they really are then i uh... don’t get that? she still looks just as fat to me?? i’ll just let this comment i made in discord as soon i saw the new designs speak for itself:

so yeah, if she is any skinner it’s because of the newly normal-sized coat, because when i look at the models side by side she legit looks the same size to me or maybe a little bit smaller—but hey, who knows, maybe i truly am just blind! but anyway, if you gave her old hairpin back then i’d honestly have no issue with her new design.

i truly hope the new designs will grow on me more though, especially mercy’s because the feeling of having an appreciation blog for a character you love a lot and not being able to celebrate something like this is a feeling that really sucks, but i... feel very alone in disliking them as much as i do and while i’m glad everyone else is happy i’m sad about that?? at least all the old skins will still be there though, so ultimately i suppose it isn’t that big a deal, i just really really hope i don’t hate symmetra or hanzo’s redesigns too whenever we see them, assuming that every character is getting these design overhauls.

i’ve also had the time to finally watch the gameplay trailer and the cinematic, and you know what’s one of the things i’ve always loved about overwatch? the maps have always been gorgeous, and the ones shown in the OW2 trailer are no exception and i can’t wait to fully see them and explore them. the gameplay itself looks solid too imo and i am very excited to see sojourn will be added to the game, she’s gorgeous and i love her. and the cinematic!! it had so many cute little details, like the ana & baby pharah photo and the birthday photo, and tracer having that picture of emily. and the winston-tracer-mei friendship, getting to see genji and rein being badasses... seeing brigitte and then echo both show up, mercy and mei having that cute little moment, everybody working together and being amazing. the scene between brigitte and tracer that was adorable, the fact that rein made a terrible “ice to meet you” joke the second he was introduced to mei. seeing winston so happy to be able to say that overwatch is back. just... it was cute and cool and fun and i liked it a lot, it reminded me of what made me fall in love with this game in the first place and it made me really excited! i also think that the story should’ve moved forward like this much sooner and that we should’ve been getting much more shorts and comics in between, and i also wish that we didn’t have to wait until overwatch 2 to get sojourn because we still don’t actually have a black woman that we can play as and that really really sucks, but i’m still looking forward to everything as well.

so, in conclusion: i uh... may have mixed feelings about some things but i have to confess that i’ve loved overwatch for years, many of the characters are very special to me, and i’m genuinely excited about overwatch 2. i fully intend to start looking into charities that support hong kong as soon as i can because i want to actually do something for them and show that i’m not ignoring what’s going on over there, but i also wanna buy overwatch 2 whenever it’s released and i feel excited to play it. unfollow or block me for that if you have to but nothing good would come from me being ashamed to say it and i won’t hide it, i definitely hate blizzard but it doesn’t remove my love for the world they created. i‘m going to donate to hong kong charities and i‘m also going to buy overwatch 2 (which probably won’t even come out until 2021 or something), and i feel like giving more to them than i give to blizzard instead of just not doing anything at all is a fair enough way to deal with this issue especially since i am doing my best to boycott them otherwise. and if i play the new OW2 content and it sucks and/or just isn’t worth whatever the price is i’ll complain about it then, and if/when we see other redesigned characters i’ll probably complain about some of them too, but for now i really am excited for the most part!

[shslpunkartist]

Before I give my thoughts, I like to ask you if you're familiar with the game Persona Q2 New Cinema Labyrinth on the 3DS. I ask because this game is the reason why Akechi went from one of the characters I felt "meh" to one of my many favorites.

The original Persona 5 game hinted to us that Akechi did grow to care for the Phantom Thieves and even had second thoughts about his plans but Q2 allowed us to see this. Well ok Royal also does this, but I haven't played it yet and only heard stuff from friends.

People hate Akechi, and quite frankly I don't blame him. Hell, from what my friend told me about Royal, Akechi himself would agree with these people that he's a terrible person who deserves hell. In the context of this, pretty much his reaction to the player/Joker to picking the dialogue option of admitting considering taking up this uh offer that I will not spoil BUT I will say, in simple terms, Akechi doesn't want the easy way out for himself. Those he had killed deserved better.

There's more to it than that but one) spoilers, two) I dunno how to simplify this without accidental spoiling, and third) dunno how to really word it tbh so asjkasdjkdas

Anyway, I adore Akechi a lot. That isn't to say I'm blind to his faults nor do I excuse his actions. However, considering all the shit he went through as a child (not helped by how shitty Japan's society is toward bastard children or how terrible their child services for orphaned children are), it's understandable he came out the way he did. The games - well Q2 and Royal at least - made it clear that he hadn't had genuine bonds for a long time- enough that he didn't know how to react when he found himself growing to genuinely like and care for the Phantom Thieves.

Ah sorry for rambling on! I was just trying to explain my thoughts here but got a bit carried away instead. Hope that's okay!

I know of PQ2 and I wanna play it (tried getting the game legit, but it's too late now, so time to.. still get it legally), but I didn't know that, interesting.

I'm at the point where he asks for the player's choice in joining him

I'm in a complicated stance with him, but personally? It's closer to a 2 out of 10

(.. aaand this is gonna turn into a ramble, so to avoid spoils with the og game (and with a kinda negative bisa towards Akechi), it's under the readmore)

The thing with Akechi is yes, he had a very shit childhood. (Apologies if I got this wrong, too sleepy to fact check) His mom was used and abused and she died, and his father was the epidemy of a dumpster fire, so he had a very rough childhood. He wanted to be a hero of justice, but he also wanted to ruin his father's life, just as how the man ruined his and his mother's. I get that. And he didn't deserve that.

But what the hell did those 100+ strangers have to do with it?

Even if his idea of karma was understandable, he handled it horribly. He brought people in that had nothing to do with it. He pretended to be on his father's side and worked with him so that, when his dad finally got into power, he'd kill him. Kick em down when they're at his highest. But from what we at least know, he caused many mental shutdowns and psychotic breakdowns, and a common incident was shutting down drivers and conductors. He mentally shut down many people, and there were many others who were caught in the crossfire, either injured or dead.

And then he tried to take CREDIT. Acting like "This was someone else's doing, and I solved the case". So fuckin fake.

His attitude is another thing for me. I may love my sassy and smartass characters, but it's usually in a playful manner with each other, or to dickheads. I get annoyed with characters that are rude to others that are just existing. It's why I wasn't a fan of Makoto until after she joined - sure, we knew what she was dealing with, but the others didn't, and she was just being a bitch to them. Of course they're gonna snap back at her. Akechi's like that as well, only with a smile, and that just annoys me more.

I almost wanna argue that Haru has it just as bad as him, more or less. She was seen as just an asset to her father, only to be used for financial and political gain. The majority of the people in her life didn't see her as Haru, but as Okumura's daughter; a net gain of their own. They were only nice to her so that they'd be favored for her father's success. Her father was more than ready to sell his own daughter off to be a sex toy, even to sacrifice her to save his own ass (based on his palace battle).

Now, Haru probably did have a genuine person here and there, and maybe Akechi truly had nothing, and I KNOW everyone has different reactions to everything, but if it was possible for her to still be an actually decent human being, then surely it would've been possible for Akechi, but nope.

You gotta have some redeeming and comforting moments first for me to care. That's just how I'd treat any regular person: you be a weird dick or cocky jerk that hides behind a gentleman facade, I'm not gonna want to be friends with you.

...... hopefully that doesn't come off the wrong way. I mean I don't dislike anyone who likes or appreciates/understands Akechi's character. Yall are still cool.

[queenharumiura]

💐

Valentine’s day memes: [x] Send me…💐: A playlist for our muses

Look friend, I did talking. Lots of it. There are like what 9 (my fave number) songs here? This is going under a readmore for ‘Neo talks too much, shut up’ reasons:

Note: Any part of any song that may sound romantic, just consider it to be some weird contrived way of Haru’s mind translating that to familial love or whatever. I couldn’t find many songs that fit them both perfectly but hey, I tried. I found songs that fit a good amount and i’m happy with that. This is my first attempt at a playlist so go easy on me. OTL 

I justcan’t wait to be king ( ‘Lion King’ movie) - I imagine that Haru watches a lot of Disney with the kids and this one reminds her of Lambo. He’s always aspiring to be a great and powerful guy, yanno? So she sees this song to be a song that fits his aspirations very well. It’s an upbeat and child-like song that fits him. 

Stand by you (Rachel Platten) - This song is one that she likes because not only is the song catchy, but it lines up well with how Haru feels. She’s very supportive of the lil guy, and she will ‘stand by him’. I understand that part of the lyrics can sound romantic and all that, but let’s face it Haru translated those parts in her mind as familial love since she’s an only child and she’s always wanted a sibling so it’s like he’s all she ever wanted in a younger sibling. He’s a very cute child who is trying his very best and it makes her want to support him. 

Home (Chris Daughtry) - I personally love this song since we sang it for choir, and when I was thinking on it, I felt like this may be a song that Haru found and thought: I wonder if Lambo feels this way about those of us in Namimori, does he consider us to be home?’ So she listens to this song and contemplates those thoughts. It’s like, no matter where he goes and wherever things takes him, he’ll always have home with them. There is a part: ‘I don’t regret this life I chose for me’ and she thinks about how he’s a part of the mafia and how she hopes that he won’t regret being involved. 

You raise me up (Westlife)- Haru thinks it to be a bit presumptuous of her, but she put this song in the playlist because she hopes that a part of this song is relatable in Lambo’s eyes. Even if it isn’t, she will still keep it in her playlist because she can relate to the song as well in some way. It’s a song, which to her sounds like a song that states that one supports the other and makes them feel strong. Though Lambo can’t physically support her or raise her up, he does help her in some ways. When things get hard for her and she is scared, she sees how hard he’s working. He’s the one that’s involved with the mafia. He was born into it. Though so young and a bit cowardly, he’s still trying to stand tall. If he can do it, why can’t she? She can be strong, just like that lil one. Watching him gives  her more emotional strength and she’s secretly grateful to him because it’s hard. Though it is, she can’t give up because he’s still doing his best and she has to live up to it if that makes sense. 

Don’t Grow up too fast (Daisy Mallory)- SSHHHHHH I know it starts off with ‘If I had a lil sister’ but I promise this song is relevant regardless. This song relates to Haru’s feelings when she looks at Lambo. She can see how he’s always trying to grow up quickly. He wants to quickly catch up to the ‘big bros’ but she still wants him to enjoy his youth and have a childhood. Don’t grow up too fast. You are still a kid. Please stop hurting yourself because you want to grow up so quickly. Enjoy life some more. Okay but I love the part where the singer sings about the boys and Haru agrees. Ignore them. ‘half of what they say is really just a bunch of noise. You got your whole life waiting, so don’t get all caught up in talking about forever, it’ll happen soon enough’. YEAH IGNORE THEM. Yes, you are childish, YOU ARE A CHILD. What should they expect from you? Don’t beat yourself over this. Accept yourself and understand that it will come in time. It’ll happen soon enough, don’t rush it. Please Lambo, don’t grow up too fast, because when you do, it’ll be too late to have the carefree fun. You’ll have more responsibilities and be involved with more pain. You may lose more people close to you and what not. More than that, it’s the feelings of an older sister who is really insecure and worried that if he’s all grown up’ she may lose him one day on a mission and she has cried over that when she thought about it or had nightmares about it. She’s terrified of the fact that one day she’ll be called and told he died. I mean even during the Vongola Ring battle thing he was in the hospital. If he was involved like that as a child, what if when he’s an adult? She’s scared. Are you crying yet? I SURE AM. HAVE BEEN

My Wish (Rascal Flatts)- Another song about her feelings. This song is pretty good at describing her wishes for Lambo. She wants for the everything the lyrics talk about for him. Know somebody loves you. May you never forget the ones who love you. May you get what you want in life. Hopefully you don’t get given more than you can handle. Guess it’s just the hopeful wishings of a self-proclaimed older sister. Yay for a shorter one because it’s easy to explain. HUZZAH.

Look Through My eyes (Phil Collins- Brother Bear movie) - Look through her eyes and maybe you’ll see something new. You are always progresing and learning new things. You are steadily becoming that lightening guardian you are some day to become. She’ll be there watching over you. Don’t be afraid, you can do it. No matter how discouraged or scared you get about the future, she’ll be there by your side and help you along the way. She’ll try to guide you and help you see that you’ll get there. Every time you feel depressed and lost, she’ll remind you: you are doing great. This song is pretty passionate in the sound, I feel. Like it sounds like it’s full of action and what not. It feels like it could be like a themesong of Lambo’s journey to becoming the strong guardian. Haru definitely tries to sing along with one. When Lambo is giving himself a hard time or if someone else is giving him a hard time, she can only see a young child who is being forced to grow up too quickly. How difficult it must be for a child to get used to such things. FREAKING STARING AT YOU SHIMON BATTLE AND THE VARIA BATTLE. THAT POOR COW CHILD!! Y’all can tell me what the Hell you want, but you have to give him credit and props for trying. Yes, he was scared. He wanted to run, and in a way he did, but he still did his best to stand his ground. He’s a CHILD, there is a limit to how much he can do and how much he can handle on a mental level. She is very impressed by him and she honestly hurts a bit if and when she ever catches Lambo being hurt or feeling insecure about himself. You are doing so good. If she was put in the same situation at your age, there is no way she could handle it. You should be proud of yourself, not ashamed. Don’t be discouraged, lil one. Ignore what the others may say to you. Big sis believes in you. She honestly wants to whisk you away and hide you away from the mafia world but she knows she can’t. You were born into it. You are heavily involved and it’s too late. Oh how she wishes she could save you from it, but she can’t, so all she can do is do her best to stay with you. Protect you when she can, and raise you up. HERE I AM CRYING AGAIN, DANG IT. I’m an elder sister myself. The eldest in fact. I’m the first born of my generation so i’m legit the oldest sister of all my cousins. i’m an emotional sister type, okay? I cried harder than my parents at their graduations. 

You’ll be in my Heart (Phil Collins- Tarzan movie) - Ahahaha another song which is kind of like a song for Lambo. If she ever shared this playlist with him, she’d hope he’d know those are her words to him. You’ll be in her heart as an adorable lil brother of hers. That will never change, and he’ll always have a place in her heart. They’re both zany lil characters. A lot of the times, the others don’t understand either Lambo or Haru. They still get along and can relate to each other. It doesn’t matter if they can’t understand their bond. They can just support each other. One day, in time, they’ll see him for what he’ll be. ‘When destiny calls you, you must be strong. I may not be with you, but you’ve got to hold on’. Even if she won’t be with you in a time of danger, you have o be strong. Protect yourself. Live on. Never give up. Be the best Lambo you can be to make her proud. Whether she’s away, or if she’s passed away because of being affiliated with the mafia, she’ll always be with him, watching over him. She’ll be watching over his shoulder, nudging him along. 

Here I am (Bryan Adams- Spirit movie) - ‘This song reminds me of Lambo-chan’. This song is something that she thinks may line up with his feelings. It’s like a plea for the older guys to notice him. Here he is. Don’t forget me. Don’t leave me behind. I am here. Bring me along so I can be with you guys. The ‘journey’ has just begun. I guess this is a song that she things may be more relevant as he grows a bit older and is a bit stronger. Maybe she’ll show him this song as a motivational kind of thing. Being with the Vongola is where you want to be. This is what you’ve strove so hard for. You are still young, there is much to learn and new things to try out. Every day can be new with a new plan. It’s a new journey to discover yourself. 

To be honest, she puts a lot of uplifting or motivational kind of songs into this playlist. Anything that makes her feel like, ‘yes i’ll watch over you,’ it’ll go into the playlist. Sometimes when she listens to them and truly listens to the lyrics and everything, she cries.