#i legit could not stop thinking about waking up next to him for a solid hour rip

[taekxxkie]

I was just...thinkin’ about waking up next to soft, cuddly Namjoon.

The haze of sleep is fading and the very first thing you’re aware of is the heavy feeling of his half-hard dick nudging into your backside. Namjoon had just rolled over in his sleep and sought out the warmth of your body under the blanket, tugging you around your waist and drawing you in nice and tightly against him. His body’s natural response to the softness of your curves was immediate, and you shifted your hips back to grind into him appreciatively.

“Good morning, Joonie.” You mumble, stifling a yawn. He doesn't respond and you realize that he's, at least partially, still asleep. Rolling over in his slack embrace, you tuck yourself into his front, pressing a trail of kisses across his shoulder. “Good morning.” You say again, hoping to wake him up.

His only response is a soft grunt, and you smile against the warmth of his skin. Namjoon hugs you just a little bit tighter, before his grip falls lax again and you pause, waiting for him to stir himself properly out of slumber, but instead he drifts right back off to sleep in a surprisingly quick amount of time. You know he's tired, working as hard as he does and you really, really want to let him sleep. It's easy to tell yourself to fall back asleep in his embrace and ignore the poking of his erection at your lower belly, but it's much more difficult to resist the temptation of his warm, soft skin. Before long you're kissing him, fully intending once more to stir this resting man awake.

Your lips glide over his shoulder and neck again, tongue sneaking out for a taste. You move across his cheek with your kisses, pressing one lightly across his plush lips. Your hand lifts to caress his face, eyes scanning his features as he still sleeps peacefully.

He's handsome, but especially so when he's relaxed like this. You toy gently with his hair and admire his face just for a moment or two, thankful that your boyfriend is a heavy sleeper so you can get these special little moments with him.

Sometime later, you would recall this moment tenderly and smile fondly at him across the room, and he would bashfully smile back in that way he did when he found something cute, totally unaware of how much your heart ached to lay him down and study his every feature in adoration like you were right now.

Another gentle peck to his pillowy lips and your mind was made up; this gorgeous man of yours needed to roll over flat onto his back and you were going to wake him up the way he deserved. Your lips were on his collarbone first, your tongue lightly grazing the warm skin before you shifted downward, on a mission. Moving down his chest, his ribs, and finally his cute tummy got some extra kisses before you were carefully glancing up for his reaction as your hand made contact with the heavy bulge at the front of his boxers.

He was laying mostly erect and hugged to the side of his inner thigh, and when your hand made contact with him there his head suddenly lifted off of the pillow and his eyes, blurry, squinting and blinking hard, were trying hard to focus on you.

"Mm, good morning, baby." His voice was husky from sleep, deeper than usual. Namjoon reached with both hands to rub at his eyes in an attempt to help them focus on the sight of your face peering up adoringly at him while your palm smoothed over his cock through his boxers.

You smile, amused at how easily he wakes up when you're in this specific position. Your hands get to work tugging down the front of his boxers until his erection is free, and knowing how sensitive your man is first thing in the morning, you spend some time getting him ready. He always wants your hands first.

Delicate and sure in their movements, Namjoon watches with messy bed hair sticking up almost comically, his jaw slack as your fingers curl snugly around the shaft of him. You stroke nice and slow a few times, base to tip, taking care not to give too much attention to the sensitive head, at least not yet. When his tensed up thighs finally begin to relax, and when he lets out a low, breathy moan, you lower your head and take him into your mouth.

Namjoon groans and his hips nudge forward, shoving himself farther up into your mouth all at once and you draw back a little, trying not to gag. His voice is muffled as he says, "Sorry, baby...you just feel so good."

You work yourself up to taking more and more of him as you can, the warm, wet confines of your mouth and throat hugging him tight and stroking him just right. Namjoon stretches his limbs and flexes his hips up into you again but this time, you're ready for it. He grips your hair very gently, not wanting to hurt you, but he's worked up to a release already and he's right there.

Your name tumbles from his lips, and he's watching transfixed at the way your lips look so beautiful wrapped tight around his shaft.

"So good for me." He pants, desperately close to finishing. "Where do you want it, baby?" He asks, and even the filthy question sounds tender and sweet as his hands begin to gently stroke your face, petting your cheeks. You don't reply, you just look up at him from under your lashes, in love and wanting to give him anything, everything he wanted. "Will you swallow it for me?" He asks, a smile playing on his lips when you attempt to nod with his cock thrusting insistently in and out of your mouth.

It doesn't take long at all, not in the early hours of the morning when your man is feeling a little extra sensitive and his body is relaxed from a good night's sleep with you wrapped up in his arms. With your affectionate touch and adoring look up at him, he comes on your tongue, mouth wide open, and he's so in love with you when you swallow that he could weep, but instead, he reaches down and wraps his arms around you and tucks the covers around you securely, and he showers you with kisses and words of praise and affection.

[jamie-leah]

Traitor

Bucky x Reader

Oneshot

Summary: Everyone thinks you're a traitor but Bucky isn't convinced.

Word: 2592

Warnings: Swearing, action stuff, hints at abuse and violence at the end.

A/N: I had a half formed daydream that turned into this. Starts strong, ends weak, enjoy!

Oneshot Masterlist Series Masterlist

Steve throws your file on the desk in front of Bucky. Bucky just stares at your face on the front of the folder, pinned by a silver paper clip.

Silver was your favourite type of jewellery. Bucky remembered storing the information away for when he bought you a silver necklace for your birthday not long ago.

“I’m sorry, Buck, but we had an operative confirm everything I just told you. Y/N is a contract killer, an assassin and she was sent here to infiltrate and kill. Namely, all of us.”

Bucky hears the words coming from Steve’s mouth, but he can’t understand them. Images of you flash in his mind. You laughing at one of his lame jokes, you crying in his arms from a nightmare, you underneath him moaning his name as he kisses a trail down your neck.

Bucky shakes his head, “I don’t believe that Steve, I can’t. Who’s the source? How do you know they’re legit?”

Steve picks up a remote and points it at a screen in the room. It blinks to life on a still image of you in a restaurant, kissing the cheek of one of the most prominent mob bosses in the city and known Hydra agent.

Bucky stands so fast his chair cracks on the floor as he tears out of the office at full speed. He skips passed the elevator and takes the stairs, missing steps in his rush.

He keeps going and going until he hits the lowest level underneath the tower and storms passed all the guards. None of them challenge him, too afraid of the former Winter Soldier to get in his way.

As Bucky gets to the cells, he grabs an agent by the scruff and grinds out, “which cell?”

They all knew who he was talking about. Everyone would be talking about this for a while to come. The agent points into the open space of cells and stutters, “its, c-cell 203”.

Bucky drops the agent and stalks through the cells until he finally comes to 203. He steps into view with clenched fists and doesn’t pause before he asks, “why?”

You sit on the edge of the cot, elbows on knees, staring at the grey wall opposite. It takes you a moment to build up the courage to look at him. You never intended for this to happen. You never wanted to get feelings involved, but as you look at Bucky, you know it’s far too late for that now. Now you have a mess on your hands.

You debate how to play this. Do you keep up the contract killer façade or do you confess, tell him everything you’ve ever wanted to tell another human being before?

��Barnes, I should have known you would pay me a visit sooner rather than later.”

Bucky felt like you had struck him in the face with the way you addressed him, but he holds firm, “why?”

“Why what? I’m afraid you’ll have to be more specific”, you reply coolly as you stand to face him.

Bucky changes his question, “is it true? Are you a contract killer?”

It takes you a few moments to keep the mask in place, “yes”.

You watch the pain flash across his features for the briefest of moments before he locks it away to be felt in private. It breaks your heart, but you’re so used to the feeling it never shows on your face.

Bucky goes to turn from you, wanting to get away, the sight of you too much to bear. You throw a question out into the void between you before he can retreat, “are you really going to leave without asking me the question you’ve been dying to ask me?”

Bucky never turns back to look at you, but he whispers, “was any of it ever real?”

Despite knowing this was the question, despite hearing it from a few people across your lifetime, it was the first time it ever hit you in the gut with such force you had to take a silent gulp of air before choking out, “no”.

He leaves without another word.

You wait a few days. Working out the routine of the place before you wait for your next move.

You wait with your back to a small portion of the concrete wall next to the cell door. A blind spot. And when the guard brings your food and slides it under the metal bars, he looks up to find you missing.

Just as he steps closer to look, you strike. You shoot your arms between the bars and pull so hard his head bangs into the metal and he crumples, out cold.

You drag is body parallel to the door and you sweep his body for keys. You start to lose hope when your hand flits over cool metal and a little jingle rings out.

You wait fifteen minutes until lights out and the use the keys. You drag the guard into the cell, swapping your uniforms before closing the door and locking him in. You check all your hair is tucked until the cap before heading for the locked door between freedom and your prison.

You rap on the metal with your heart beating furiously against your ribcage. But the door opens without a problem and you have to stop yourself from sprinting down the hall and up the stairwell.

Once you make it up one flight of stairs with no alarms raised you start to sprint. Before you leave, you have to make it back to your room for your go bag. You can’t leave it when it has all the information you need for what started this all off.

You run and run and run. You run until your lungs burn with a fire that’s been flowing in your veins since you were born. You run until your legs scream at you to stop and just when you don’t think you can take any more flights of stairs, you make it to the top.

You stop. Your hand on the handle, taking a moment to get your breathing under control. You push the handle down slowly and open the door a crack to find the hallway in darkness.

You slip through and creep on the tiles without a sound as you make it to the first spare room in the hall.

You get into the room no problem and let out a breath when you realise no one knows you used this room to stash your information.

You waste no time in grabbing your go back from the closet, checking everything you need is in there before heading for the door again. Three steps from the exit and alarms scream out, waking everyone from their slumber. The alarm is followed by a female robotic voice, “alert, alert, prisoner escape. Alert, alert, prisoner escape.”

You swear under your breath as you rush out the door to see Bucky, Natasha and Sam at the end of the hall, near the stairway. Your only exit.

They spot you seconds after you spot them, and you take off running in the opposite direction. You can’t afford a hand to hand with all three of them. As confident as you are in your abilities they have just as much, and you don’t want to hurt them.

They shout in your direction, but you ignore them as you unzip your bag and rummage around for a miracle. You get to the living space when you finally feel it and a flimsy plan comes to mind.

You turn, gun in both hands as you drop the go bag. Bucky, Natasha and Sam all creep into the room, guns pointed in your direction as yours is in theirs.

“There’s nowhere else to go now, Y/N,” Sam says in his calm way.

You hold firm, the sofas keeping the four of you apart. You look in Bucky’s direction as you talk, “things are more complicated than they seem. And I’m sorry you were caught up in it. I’m not a good person and I’ll get what I deserve, but I have something I need to do first.”

“And what’s that? Kills us?”, Nat asks.

You shake your head, still looking at Bucky, “If I wanted to kill you, I could have done it three times over. You’re not my mission.”

“Then give yourself up and explain.” Sam tries to reason.

You lower your gun slowly, “it would take too long, and you may never believe me. I can’t afford that, and I’ll never get a chance like this again.”

Bucky remains silent throughout the whole exchange, but you study each other the entire time. You try to convey that you lied earlier before reaching up your arm with lightning speed.

Two shots and the chandelier that Stark insisted on installing for the living room crashes in front of the three as you turn and shoot the glass window. As the glass spiderwebs, you drop the gun and run at full speed. You have a moment to acknowledge that throwing yourself from the top of the tower is the dumbest move you’ve ever made as the air rushes to greet you.

You twist with a hand in your pocket and throw upwards, watching and praying for your miracle to work as the rope and hook catches and you plummet.

You fall down the building on the rope watching the ground and unclip at the last second, rolling with the momentum as the impact jars through your bones.

Bucky couldn’t believe you threw yourself out the window. He was the first to recover, leaping over the lights and the sofa to dive head first after you. He digs his metal hand into the concrete and slides down after you.

He sees you roll and run immediately like the pro that you are and wastes no time pursuing you.

You dart between traffic and glance behind to see him behind you. You growl in frustration at the stubborn solider, having to change your plans once again as you head for the roads.

You instinctively feel Bucky gaining on you with the serum pumping through his veins so when you spot a cargo truck coming on the road below. You don’t hesitate to jump off the road you’re on and slam into the truck underneath.

Your lungs scream for the third time that night as all the air leaves them, but you pay no attention as you look up to find Bucky staring after you.

You walk in the quiet of the night, looking down at the folded piece of paper. You check you have the right address when the empty warehouse finally comes into view. You slip in without any problems and head over to the machine where you stashed more stuff.

Just as you go to reach for the bag you hear the click of a gun. You freeze. You turn slowly, with your hands visible and find yourself staring into the face of Bucky and the barrel of his gun.

You resist the urge to roll your eyes and sigh, “how did you find me?”

“Please, do you really think I don’t know you after all this time? After our talk in the cells, I checked all the spare rooms. Found your go bag and the addresses. This was the closest one to the tower”, Bucky replies with an easy shrug.

You nod your head, “but if you found them, why did you leave them there? Why didn’t you tell anyone else?”.

“Tell me what’s going on, Y/N”, Bucky dodges the question.

You knew there was no other way out of this now. You had to tell him if you ever had a hope of getting this done tonight.

“Look, can you put the gun down-“

“Not until you tell me what’s going on. I can’t trust you.”

You pretend like his words don’t hurt, though they’re warranted, “okay, okay. Look, most of it is true. I am a contract killer. Long story short, I was born into a mob family. Mum died giving birth to me and left me and my older sister with my piece of shit father, the “use you as an ashtray type father”. At least he did with my sister. She took the brunt of his shit…anyway, when I turned 13 and had my first period, he sold me to a man. That man? Was the mob boss I know you saw me with, Joe Selene. I’ll skip passed all the torture and right to the part where he trained me as a contract killer for him and bided my time. My father had gone underground and with my limited access to resources I couldn’t find him.”

Bucky lowers the gun as you go through your story, his features softening at your tale of tragedy.

“I swore to my sister that I would come for her but I needed to gain the trust of Selene so I could get the resources to find my father. That was when he got involved with Hydra and they asked him to take you out. I agreed, knowing that you would have all the resources I needed to find my father and my sister.”

Bucky shakes his head, “why didn’t you tell me, us, any of this? We could have helped you.”

You look away from him, “because about a week after I got to the tower, I read my sisters name in the obituary. All the people I had killed to get to my sister was for nothing. She died alone, waiting for a rescue that never came and I knew…I knew that I was going to kill that bastard for everything that happened. I also knew that none of you would let me. You would reason about justice and doing things the right way. But I know what’s right and that’s that bastard six feet under and in hell.”

You look back up at Bucky to find him already watching you. You square your shoulders and jut your chin as you say, “so, you’re either with me or against me and so help me God, if you try to stop me from leaving this building and killing that piece of shit, I will not hesitate to put you down. I told you that you’re not my mission, but I will damn make sure nothing gets in the way.”

Bucky nods, “I’m in.”

You turn back to your bag and pull out the knives to strap around your body. You hand a few to Bucky and he takes them without a word.

As he turns to head back out of the warehouse you throw the question out again, “are you really going to leave without asking me the question you’ve been dying to ask me?”

Bucky turns to look at you this time. He captures your eyes with his as he stares into your soul and whispers, “was any of it real?”

You reply without hesitation, “yes. Every single word.”

Bucky takes a few long strides before grabbing your face with his hands and crashing his lips to yours in a bruising kiss. You return with the same ferocity, gripping his shirt in your fists to try and bring his body closer to yours.

When you can no longer breathe, you break the kiss. You both pant as Bucky brings his forehead down to meet yours. He whispers, “after we go drop a few bodies, what do you say we go take a trip. Just you and me?”

[yuta-nakamots]

perfect - z.cl

Pairing - Chenle x Fem!Reader

Genre - fluff, angst, university!au, friends to lovers!au

Warnings -  alcohol consumption, mention of drunkeness, lots of arguments, heavy making out, breakups, contains an aged up chenle (26-ish) towards the end

Summary - He’s definitely not your knight in shining armor, he may not be the one you bring home to mother, but he’ll be the one to give you flowers. Chenle is not the right one for you, but he is for right now.

Word Count - 5.2k

A/N - Bolded phrases are song lyrics taken from One Direction’s song ‘Perfect’ and inspired from the lyrics along with all the vlives where Chenle and the members have started yelling out the lyrics.This was supposed to come out back in January but school held it up and now Ana is gone hhhhh. I know she’s still on Tumblr but under a new url so if anyone wants to send this to her, to let her know that I did finish it, that would be nice. 

Taglist - @astroboy-lele​​​ @in-my-neofeelings​​​ || fill out this form if you’d like to join my general taglist ^^

Written for the Sometimes Letting Go… Collab originally hosted by @sunryu​ who unfortunately deactivated. 

When I first saw you from across the room, I could tell you were curious

The mutual attraction between you and Chenle was undeniable. Ever since the two of you first met as freshmen in an econ class, you knew he was your twin flame and he was yours. That initial meeting was almost comical, the way the professor said to pair up and talk to someone next to them for a bit and it seemed like everyone had turned away from you except for the boy sitting next to you.

It seems you both had the same realization as your heads turned and eyes met. “Well I guess you’re my friend for today,” he began, “hi, my name is Chenle. Pleased to make your acquaintance.”

“Y/n,” you told him, “the pleasure is all mine.”

“So, why are you in this class?” He asked, tapping his pen on his leather-bound planner.

You hesitated for a second as you thought about how much to tell him. “I’m majoring in business and this was just one of the mandatory classes in my plan.”

“Hm, same here,” Chenle shared, seeming the slightest bit amused at your similarity, “would you also happen to be in calculus this semester?”

“Section 3 at 10:30?” You counter.

Chenle broke into a smile, “that’s the one.”

“How about freshman seminar?” You asked.

“1:15 in the world language building?” Chenle offered, copying your answer from before.

“Wow,” your eyebrows were raised in actual disbelief, “did you steal my schedule or something?”

“No, but I do believe in fate,” the boy next to you confessed, “would you like to get lunch sometime before freshmen seminar?”

You nodded, “I’d like that,” you stopped mid-sentence when you remembered that you told your friends you’d eat with them, “I am gonna be eating with my friends though so I could introduce you to them if you’d like.”

“Want to bet that we have the same friends too?”

“No way, that would be too coincidental.”

And coincidental it was. Somehow your friends knew some of Chenle’s friends whether it be from high school activities, childhood friends, or even having just met in their own classes. Your small group of five had immediately doubled in size.

Of course, with such a large group of friends, there was much fun to be had and many memories to be made. During midterms is when you were thankful you were majoring in business and not something like biology or chemistry. You could still go out and have fun on weekends with Chenle and the majority of your friends, meanwhile a few poor souls had to stay back to study their ‘reaction mechanisms’ or whatever the heck those things were called.

You quickly found that you weren’t one for parties though you loved to hang out with your friends and have small little parties of your own in the dorms. Every single time, as you all got progressively drunker and started to clock out for the night, it was always you and Chenle left being the two most sober with no other choice but to take care of your friends over hushed conversations.

“How much vodka did Hannah even drink?” Chenle asked while you both worked on cleaning up the mess of solo cups and napkins surrounding your friend who had, unfortunately, drank over half of the bottle. You picked it up, waving it at Chenle to show him. “She’s gonna have a nasty hangover…or at least wake up super dehydrated.”

As you worked on laying a blanket across her, passed out on the floor, Chenle had managed to stuff all the napkins inside the cups he had collected and was busy aiming at the trash can across the room. Right as he was about to shoot, “miss!” you called out. The little stack of cups hit the rim of the plastic trash bin and fell to the floor. Chenle turned to you, sticking out his tongue and imitating the way you caused him to mess up before going to properly dispose of the rubbish.

Instead of simply placing it in the waste, he once again returned to where he stood before, with one eye shut, aiming for the bin. You let out a scoff, ready to disturb him once more. He shot you a glance, knowing what you were planning from the way you just stood watching him. But regardless, he tried again. “Airball” you sang as he released the short stack of cups, sending them flying to the foot of the bin.

Chenle let out a growl, childishly stomping his way over to you while you tried to quietly escape from his grasps through the mess of food and other miscellaneous items on the floor. From the hushed giggles and name-calling from the two of you as you both stumbled around the room, to the whispered late-night thoughts and affirmations spoken from your positions on the floor with your heads resting on the edge of a bed, you barely even noticed how fast time was passing.

“Are you going home for the holidays?” You asked him.

He shook his head, “it’s my first time getting to live away from my parents and whenever I do go back, they’ll probably be expecting me to bring some girl with me.”

You turned to look at him, “why would they expect that?”

“They’re both getting old and want to retire soon,” Chenle started, “so the faster I get married and take over the company, the faster they’ll get to live out the rest of their lives,” he explained.

“Well that’s not very nice of them,” you commented, “what kind of parents would place such high responsibility on their child like that?”

“Mine I guess,” Chenle sighed.

After a moment of silence, you sat up, unsure what to make of the next words to come out of your mouth. “If you want, I could go with you.” Chenle looked at you with his eyebrows furrowed. “Like, I could be your fake girlfriend or something so that they don’t bother you so much about finding one.”

“That’s…an idea,” he started, biting on the corner of his lip as he played out possible scenarios in his head. “I think that would only make it worse though since we’d both have to make up stories and tell the same information.”

“True. But we could at least make it look believable, don’t you think?” You reached over to pet Chenle’s head the same way you’ve seen him do to his friends. “Oh, Chenle, you’re so cute,” you cooed, “I can’t wait to marry you and be with you for the rest of our lives.”

He grabbed your wrist and put it in your lap, not very keen on the show of affection. “Yeah, I think we’d look like a pretty convincing couple.”

“Do we look good together though?” You pondered. “If we were to show up to an event or something, would we make people stop and stare at us?”

“Anyone can do that if they wear something weird or do something out of the ordinary-“

“Okay but that’s not what I’m asking,” you interrupted, “I’m asking, would we look good together as a couple?”

Chenle shrugged apprehensively, “sure.” Your eyes bore into him as if forcing a more legit answer out of him. “Yes, I think we would look good as a couple.”

It was as if you and Chenle were made for each other. Whatever one did, the other was never too far behind. It was absolutely no surprise to your friends when you told them Chenle had asked you out and you became official. While your college careers continued and friends came and went, Chenle was always with you. He was your solid island in the middle of a tumultuous sea, your oasis in a dried desert. You didn’t need anyone else around to have fun, just him, just the two of you.

But if you like causing trouble up in hotel rooms and if you like having secret little rendezvous

Being with Chenle was as wild as things could get. It meant impulsive plans and bad decisions. Weekend nights normally consisted of one of you driving with no destination in mind until someone got hungry. Even at that point, the night didn’t end.

Sometimes the two of you would stay out past midnight, not wanting to leave each other’s company just yet. The feeling of the wind whipping past you as Chenle drove or the thrill of gassing it down the freeway was almost dreamlike. One would think that at this point, you’d return home, but for you, your home was wherever Chenle was. If it meant staying in a small hotel room for the night drinking cheap wine out of paper cups then so be it, that was home.

“Baby, you already drank almost half of the bottle, leave some for me,” Chenle teased, his eyes glimmering under the low lighting. The brightness of the small lamp on the desk failed to reach where he was sitting, the cozy armchair too far in the corner for it to be illuminated.

“Come here and get some then,” you suggested, lazily winking at him before downing another shot-sized gulp and enjoying the burn from the liquid running down your throat. The bed you were sitting on wasn’t all that soft but you had already warmed up a little spot of it and gotten too comfortable to move.

Chenle raised an eyebrow at you, a smirk tugging at his lips. “I don’t think you want me to do that.”

“Why not?” Your expression mirroring his.

“You wanna find out?

“Maybe I do.”

He let out a scoff and within a second he was on the bed, climbing up and settling over you. His warm breath fanned your neck, the scent of alcohol filling your senses. “Are you sure about that?”

“Fuck around and find out, handsome,” you taunted.

You had barely even finished your sentence before Chenle’s lips were on yours, his usual soft and pillowy lips became hot and heavy against yours under the guide of the fifteen-dollar wine. You were sure that you were definitely getting tipsy but Chenle’s love and passion were even more overwhelming. It was moments like this when you felt that you were drunk off of his love and it was absolutely intoxicating in the best way.

If you like to do the things you know that we shouldn’t do, then baby I’m perfect

It was drunk weekends like this that led to a rocky start of the following week. It’s not that you and Chenle were bad students, it’s just that when you become totally infatuated with the person you love, you start to devote yourself to them instead of what actually needs to get done.

As sophomores in college, one would think that you’d have a little more self-control but with Chenle, you just couldn’t help it. He was worse than any drug you could ever take, to the point where your friends would have to intervene and keep you in your rooms until a substantial amount of work was done.

You called them annoying but really you should’ve been thankful to them for caring so much about you back then, and you are thankful, looking back on it. They always told you ‘distance makes the heart grow fonder’ and you wish you had listened to them. Maybe if you did, you wouldn’t have lost a relationship that you thought was practically flawless.

Perfect for you

In junior year, that is when your beautiful illusion finally began crumbling down. Your workloads grew heavier and your hours of sleep decreased. Chenle would often leave you on read, having opened your message in the middle of studying then forgotten to reply to it. Even when you childishly got upset at him for that, he’d always give you the same apology or buy you something cute as if money could shut you up.

With little to no distance between the two of you, it was easy for boundaries to be crossed and for problems to go unaddressed. You can feel like you know someone so well, that they’ll always understand what you mean and they can read your words like a book, but it didn’t seem that way anymore with Chenle.

He’d make fun of the way you always made him say ‘I love you’ at least once a day or some of your other pet peeves, including the way you had a Hello Kitty mouse pad that was ‘too childish for a college student to be using.’ It may have been out of love but it sure didn’t seem that way.

I might never be the hands you put your heart in or the arms that hold you any time you want them

Soon, the little pricks in your relationship spread past closed doors and into your schoolwork. Sharing a major and classes with your significant other was not exactly ideal, especially when they had different values and beliefs from you and had to argue for their reasoning.

“That just isn’t sustainable in the long run though,” you commented as you read through Chenle’s senior research report while seated opposite of him inside a library study room.

He ran a hand through his hair, leaning back into his seat, about to repeat himself for the fourth time. “It’s not about sustainability, it’s about the profit margin that’s being made. What don’t you get?”

“It’s not good for the environment, it’s not good for the people working in the factories,” you point out, “I don’t get how you can subject these things onto people.”

“Y/n, we’re business majors,” he stated plainly, “we study money, the economy, sales, company relationships, we’re not here to be environmentalists. Things don’t have to last very long, so much as they make a profit.”

“But we should think about the impact of our future businesses and their longevity in the world-”

“You should think about passing this class and stop being so prissy and uptight about saving trees or whatever the fuck you’re going on about.”

You were absolutely shocked at the words that had just come out of his mouth. This wasn’t the first time he had seemingly degraded you in this manner, but when it came to school and your own work, you were deeply offended at what he had said, especially since both of you had spent many hours on your respective projects.

“Chenle,” you began softly, “tell me you didn’t mean that.”

He refused to meet your gaze, “If I told you that then I would be a liar.”

“Look, you can’t just spew whatever bullshit you want and just expect that people won’t get hurt,” you criticized, only to be cut off once more.

“Then maybe you should learn to not take everything so seriously,” he snapped back.

“I...I think we need a break.”

“Agreed.”

“No, from each other.” Chenle’s head whipped up to look at you, his eyes went wide when he realized what you were insinuating.

“Baby no, you know it’s not like that,” he started, but it was already too late. You blocked his voice out of your head as you packed your belongings, just wanting to get out of this room, wanting to get away from him.

This wasn’t the first time you had fought with him in this way but it felt like you had finally lost all your patience. You were tired of always being told you were wrong and having your thoughts and ideas invalidated. As you stormed away from the library, you realized that maybe you needed to let go of things that no longer brought you joy.

Sometimes letting go...is a new start

After that incident, you did indeed have a fresh start. You slowly removed Chenle from your life and just in time for graduation. Whenever he tried to approach you on campus, you always turned the other way even if it meant being late to class. Luckily, you didn’t have many shared classes with him anymore and you were all the more grateful for it right now.

You’d come back to your campus apartment with the occasional flower or sticky note left on your doorstep asking you to give him another chance but you simply didn’t have enough time or energy to care anymore. Commencement was approaching and you still had yet to hear back from any of the companies you had applied to for internships.

But that don’t mean that we can’t live here in the moment

One of your friends had mentioned that Chenle had already received news that he was accepted into his family’s business, a large company in China, and you wished you could’ve been there when he had read the email. You could practically hear his yell of delight, his laugh when he’d turn to hug you, even if it was practically guaranteed that he’d get in, you missed it all so much but there was no turning back now.

It wasn’t until after commencement did you receive your own letter of acceptance from one of the largest foreign trade companies in the area after you saw Chenle for the last time. “Zhong Chenle, Bachelor of Arts in business management.” You remembered the immense pride and pain you felt in your chest, watching him walk across the stage to claim his diploma as you sat clothed in the same cap and gown only a few rows away. You wished you could share your emotions with him, but you had to remind yourself that he was no longer yours, he was no longer the man you first fell in love with.

‘Cause I can be the one you love from time to time

Four years have passed since that moment at commencement. In those four years, you’ve climbed your way up in the company, taking a hold of a directing position in project development and management. With all your success though, there was always one failure that kept floating through your mind. The number of sleepless nights and wandering moments you’ve spent thinking about all the ‘what ifs’ and the changes you should’ve made in your relationship have all decreased with time, but sometimes it all comes crashing back. You miss the memories you made with him and you miss being so young and naive.

Sometimes you managed to hear a thing or two about the company he worked for but you never paid much attention to it, always falling back into a spiral of guilt and calling yourself the sole reason why your relationship fell apart. Chenle would even pop into your mind at the weirdest times when you’d be thinking of anything but him.

Like the other day as you were staring out the window of your office, watching people and cars pass by, your memory of Chenle speeding down the empty highway suddenly resurfaced. The adrenaline you felt from the buildings and signs whizzing by, the slight buzz of alcohol you felt in your system, the cool air coming in from Chenle’s window, the warmth of his hand in yours. You couldn’t help but smile at it fondly yet it turned sour when you thought of the last time he ever drove you somewhere. You had argued with him about something dumb, you couldn’t even remember it at this point, and you even slammed the door before storming off to who knows where.

Or some months ago, you were interviewing possible new hires for the company and met someone from Puerto Rico. Once you finished the interview with them, you sat at the wooden desk while remembering the way you teased Chenle because he didn’t know how to pronounce Puerto Rico. You thought it was cute and even told him that, but it ended up in another fight because you may have spent a little too long dwelling on the topic.

But oftentimes when you find yourself thinking about him, you’d wonder how he’s doing. Is he happy where he is right now? What kinds of things is he doing for his job? Has he found a new girlfriend? What if he dated many other people after me? What if he’s married? Would he have children by now? Or most importantly, ‘does he still love me?’

And if you like midnight driving with the windows down, and if you like going places we can’t even pronounce

Regardless, you’d shake off all these thoughts and continue about your day, completing the tasks assigned to you. The majority of your time was spent conducting interviews and deliberating with the directors about who to hire for what position. It was quite fun, really. You got to meet all of the new hires before they came into the company and you felt empowered by the fact that you would be indirectly responsible for the future of the company in this sort of way.

On one particular day, everything felt like it was going just a little too well. Your hair was done just the right way, traffic was light, your coworkers seemed to all be in a good mood, but most importantly, there were no fat folders sitting on your desk, waiting for you to go through. Just a single sheet of paper with the list of the new hires coming in for their briefings along with the notes you were required to go over.

You didn’t bother checking it, seeing as how you had exactly two minutes left before the scheduled meet time, which was exactly the amount of time you needed to head downstairs to the conference room. You really should have checked the list though. It would have prepared you for the shock of seeing a certain someone sitting at the table in a suit that looked all too good on him.

“Zhong Chenle?” You audibly gasped, pausing in your tracks the moment you entered the conference room.

His eyes were already on you as if he knew you’d be the person to walk through that doorway at that exact moment. “That would be me.”

The other new hires looked around at each other sharing all types of glances. Worried, suspicious, surprised, questioning, nothing really all that positive. “Sorry, he’s just an old friend that I was surprised to see,” you quickly explained, trying to pull yourself back together.

Throughout your whole presentation, it was like all the attention in the world was directed at you. Never had you felt this nervous before doing something that was supposed to be so familiar. Every time your eyes glanced over in Chenle’s direction, his gaze managed to catch yours as if he was trying to speak to you without any words.

By the time you adjourned the meeting and sent the new hires off to their respective departments, it felt like you had run a marathon. Your palms were clammy, your legs shaky, your mind racing, and your heart was pounding.

Chenle was the only one left in the conference hall while you pushed in all the chairs and turned off the lights. “Looks like these years have done you well.” He commented, finally able to take in the sight of you now that there was no one else around.

“I could say the same for you.” His shoulder had gotten broader and any childlike features had left his face. He truly looked like he had grown into a man. The dark gray suit he was wearing fit the lines of his body so well, it made you think he could’ve been a model instead of simply becoming an office worker. “So how have you been?”

He did a classic Chenle shrug, “nothing much really. I started off being just a marketing employee, did some work, and got myself to be chief marketing officer. It seems you’ve gotten much further than I have, though. Project development and management?”

“Oh, it’s not anything huge. I just help with planning things out and doing all the paperwork for its execution. I only do interviews and help with hiring when we’re in season, which would be why I’m here right now,” you explained, motioning for him to follow you out of the room. “Your new supervisor is probably wondering where you are. I sent the rest of the newbies a few minutes ago already. I’ll just tell him that you had a few questions about our operations.”

“Wow, cheating the system? That’s not the way I remember you,” Chenle said with mock disapproval. You led him to the elevators, pleasantly surprised to find one still on your floor after you hit the ‘up’ button. Your eyes met with his while you gestured for him to go in. “Ladies first,” he had a cat-like grin on his face as you rolled your eyes and stepped into the elevator.

“So why did you decide to leave your company? Weren’t you going to take it over someday?” You ask over the squeaking of the doors closing.

Chenle leaned against the cold metal wall of the elevator, “I still plan to but I felt like they were just kind of babying me or treating me differently because they knew of my background,” he explained. You could only nod to acknowledge the fact that you were listening. “I told my parents that I wanted to get experience outside of the company and they didn’t really understand at first until I showed them my point of view and how it’s a little worrisome to perhaps, learn how to cook when you always have chefs around you giving you instructions down to the tiniest things.”

The elevator came to a stop and the heavy doors opened onto the floor Chenle would be working on. “But why this company? We’re not even closely related to yours?” You led him down the hallway in the direction of his supervisor's office.

“My parents were the ones who recommended it, actually. It would be a little risky to go to a neighboring one in the case of it being viewed as a betrayal or like some kind of inside mission so they said I should just come back here since I’d probably have a high chance of acceptance-“ you put a hand up to stop him from talking, seeing how many of the other employees had started to look at him due to his volume.

“Chenle, must I remind you that this is an office?” You gritted out, embarrassed in front of your colleagues.

He shook his head before turning to the mass of them, bowing politely then continuing in the same direction as before. Once both of you reached the head office at the end of the hallway, Chenle spoke up once more. “By any chance, are you free tonight?”

“That depends,” you began, “what are you hinting at?”

“Just seeing if you’d like to go out to dinner so we can properly catch up, I guess,” he proposed bashfully.

You hummed in thought, “mmm, put in a good word for me with your supervisor and you’ve got a deal.”

“Deal,” he agreed.

“Meet me in the lobby at 5:30, don’t be late,” you told him before knocking on the wooden door in front of you and allowing Chenle in.

If you like to do whatever you’ve been dreaming about, then baby you’re perfect

You thought Chenle’s wine phase in college would be just that, a phase, but it really wasn’t. He had ordered an expensive bottle of merlot even with all your insistence that you wouldn’t be drinking and even made him promise that he’d be sober enough to drive himself back to wherever his accommodations were.

He made a face of fake dismissal before picking up your last conversation. “So anyway, as I was saying earlier, my parents suggested that I come back here, especially since I got my degree from the university so I’m bound to get in.”

You were about to open your mouth to say something like “getting in is not a guarantee” especially coming from your experience in doing interviews and having to decide which applicants to turn down, but you decided against it.

“Initially, I was a little against it since I didn’t want to come back to somewhere I’ve already stayed at for some time,” he confessed, “but after I did some research on the company and found out that you’re one of the associates, I was a little more open to the idea.”

There was a break of silence while you started to link your thoughts together. “So you came here because you found out that I work here?”

“Yes, but also no,” Chenle stated, blurting the second part out rather quickly when he saw the shift in your expression. “It is true that I wanted to see you and how you were doing but it’s not just that. I figured that if you worked here and had such a high position, it must be a good place to work.”

“But what I’m hearing is…you came here because of me,” you state bluntly though your heart couldn’t help but let out a cheer of delight.

Chenle redirected his gaze at the neighboring tables. “You could say that, sure.”

“Chenle, what do you want out of this? What do you want out of me specifically?” You contended. His eyes continued to flit around the lowly lit space, not daring to meet yours unlike earlier in the conference hall. “What? Did you come back just expecting me to run into your arms? Did you think we would just pick up where we left off?”

Now he looked down at the white tablecloth, as if in shame. “Would it be wrong of me to ask for a second chance?”

You too joined him in staring at the table, wishing that he had answered ‘no’ to your previous questions. “It wouldn’t exactly be wrong, but it’s not right either. I’d be willing to give you a second chance if we agree to not call it that, but rather a promise.”

He finally looked up at you again, his dark pupils catching the dim golden lights above him. “A promise?”

You nodded. “We’re older now, we’re fully grown adults with jobs to do and taxes to pay. We’re no longer the same carefree college students we used to be.”

“Well yeah, obviously-“

“No, listen,” you interject, cutting him off, “we can’t just recklessly play with each other’s minds and feelings like we used to. No more games and no more ‘next times.’ If we try again, I want this to be a promise that we’ll both do better because we can and we want to.”

“If it’s a promise that you want then,” Chenle held out his hand with his pinky finger extended, “it’s a promise I’m willing to make.”

You linked your pinky with his before bringing your thumbs together and sealing the promise. Matching smiles appeared across both of your faces as you stepped into a new chapter of life with Chenle by your side once more.

Sometimes letting go is…perfect. So let’s start right now

[msmelodyblade]

Tbhk headcanons, when their s/o throws up:

Hanako:

Panics almost immediately

Not sure what’s happening or why it’s happening

Immediately by his your side trying to comfort you anyway he can

‘Cause I mean, come on. He’s a ghost. He hasn’t been sick in a long time

He’ll hold your hair back if it’s long to make sure none of it got in the way

Sweet baby Hanako is always there for you

He’d rub your back and once you’ve finished vomiting, he’ll ask you what’s going on

He wants answers, Damnit. He’s gonna get them one way or another

If he could leave the school to take care of you, he would

Has to solemnly watch you leave as he worries about your health

When you’re better, you’ll read him for it

Kou Minamoto:

Already has the bucket

Saw your face practically turn green during class and was immediately at your side with the trash can

Will take you to the nurse and will stay with you until the nurse decides what to do

If you’re sent home, he’ll want to have an excuse so he can at least walk you home

Will get scolded by Teru later for it, but he doesn’t care

You always come first when it comes to Kou

Fight me Teru, I dare you

When you two get to your place, Kou’s got you swaddled in blankets already and making soup

He makes your favorite soup

If you don’t like soup, he makes your favorite food, but makes it bland so it doesn’t make you feel worse than you already are

Yashiro Nene:

Sad to see you throwing up

Will also be annoyed since she had just cleaned the toilet you’re throwing up in

Similar to Hanako, she’s gonna hold your hair back and make sure you’re okay

If not, similar to Kou, she’ll take you to the nurses office right away

Since she still has bathroom duty, she’ll call your parents for you and have them pick you up

After she’s done, she’ll come over to your house and spend some time with you so you don’t feel alone

Hanako will tease her once you’re better about having to re-clean the toilet you threw up in

Teru Minamoto:

You’ll be hanging out with him and Akane in the student council room when you have to suddenly excuse yourself

Teru will get concerned and try to follow you before hearing you throwing up Im the bathroom nearby

When you come out, he’s got his hand over your forehead already, trying to figure out if you had a fever

When he confirms that you either do or do not have one, that’s when he takes action

Will bring you back to the council room and sit down with you in his arms

Depending on how you’re feeling will depend on how he holds you

Pretty good? You facing him so he can rub your back

Pretty bad? Facing away from him and receiving stomach rubs to try and help soothe your stomach

He’ll take you home and get you some microwaveable soup

Even you can’t trust him with the stove

He’ll sit with you while you eat and watch whatever you want to watch that day

When you’re asleep, he’ll take you to your room and lay you in bed before laying with you and falling asleep

Mitsuba:

If you vomit, he’s done for

Out cold for at least a few minutes

Baby don’t do too well with bodily fluids that aren’t his

He’ll try to make you smile once he does wake back up, though

If he’s near anyone in the broadcasting room, he’ll try to keep you away from them

Will do his best, although he’s scared, to keep Tsukasa from bothering you

Will hold you for a little while until you fall asleep

If you’re back to normal the next day, he’ll tease you for looking “vulnerable” until you bring up the fact he passed out

He’ll be upset and whine at you about it for a while afterwards

Tsukasa:

Ho boy

He’ll stand there and watch you for a while

Not sure what to do other than to just watch

It’ll have to be Sakura or Natsuhiko that end up telling him he’s supposed to comfort you

He’s new to the dating scene, he didn’t know that

What he thinks of comfort is him climbing all over you

You hate it

You’ll tell him to stop and look at him with a dead serious look

That look makes the wheels in Tsukasa’s head turn

He knows you’re genuinely not feeling good when he thought it was a joke

He’s now severely protective of you

Sakura wants to give you tea? Hissed at

Natsuhiko just wants to ask if you’re okay? Gets hissed at

You’re Tsukasa’s and it’s his job to comfort you, not theirs

Will not allow you to leave the school that night, so you have to give your family an excuse as to why you weren’t home

Sakura backs you up on this to give you a solid alibi

I wanted to give this a shot and I think it actually came out pretty good. This is legit based on how I’m feeling today and I wondered how’d they react to it.

[aria-chicken-flugget]

The Brothers (+Undateables)

React to A CRONCHIE MC

MC who’s joints crack randomly OR has Joint Hypermobility Syndrome

For @offbrandmilk and The Simp Club 😂✌️

The Brothers ~

Lucifer 🔥

Y’all are chillin in his study as he finishes up his work when *CRONCH*

He snaps his gaze up, that disgusted surprise on his face at the noise

“MC... did you- did you just make that noise?”

“Ah yea, sometimes my back cracks randomly when I get up lol.”

*Disgust intensifies*

“Do you... need assistance of some kind, perhaps?”

Would relax and sigh with relief when you say no

“You humans never cease to amaze me.” “Thanks!” “... That wasn’t a compliment.” “:(“

Would Glare TM each time it happens, making you feel increasingly self conscious

Until he’ll inexplicably soften - “MC...” “Yes?” “When -“ he’ll huff, “Doesn’t that hurt you? To do that...?”

His brows downturned, blush upon his cheeks as he attempts to examine the latest CRONCH

If yes, will personally see to it that you are looked after during those times - “it’s not that bad Lucifer! Really!” Does not register lol

If no, will revert back to being vexed or ‘disgusted’ by it, especially in public

Clicks his knuckles, on purpose, with a sickening crack

“You hypocrite!”

Mammon 💵

You’re messing with the Levi, having taken a treasured figurine to ‘sell’ when you drop it

“Hurry up would ya? He’ll catch up!”

You squat to pick it up when *CRONCH*

In the heat of the chase, silence falls dead

A solid minuet of Mammon frowning between you and your knees before anyone speaks

The Most Expressive Derp TM

“Wha- what the heck was that?!”

You rise, brushing it off with an exasperated sigh “It’s nothing, happens a lot.”

“We don’t even make that noise when Lucifer punishes us.”

Would occasionally steal glances thinking he’s being surreptitious about it when you finally ask “What is it?” Would fiercely deny it

“Pfft Me? THE GREAT MAMMON? Starin’? Ha - in your DREAMS Human.” Blush

*Spongebob narrator voice* 5 Seconds Later

“Ok so what if i was starin’, huh? It was weird!”

... “You’re fine though, right? It didn’t hurt ya doin that to get the toy of his, right?”

... “Mammon! Would you stop looking at me like i’m going to snap in half if you breathe?!” Blush

Levi 👾

You’re doing a co-op match of a horror game you’re trying with him - things get jumpy when *CRONCH*

You’d bent your arms ‘inhumanly’ at a jump scare, accompanied by a CRONCH

Levi thought it was the game that made that sickening crack

You wish you could frame the horror stricken expression that turns to face you after a dumb moment

His face unmoving, his eyes flit to your bent back arms and your casual smile

Error 404, Levi does not compute

You break the silence with a laugh, “Oh yea i’ve got hypermobility -“ bends arms further

He snaps out of it with a “Wooooaaaaaaaahhhhh!!” “Eek!” As you tease him a bit further

“The game’s scary enough!” “LOLOLOL”

Actually finds it really cool

Quickly gets you two to cosplay and roleplay usuing your ‘Special Ability’ as he’d call it

Would 100% roleplay kinky and try to do it himself, too

Fails

Satan 📚

He’d be teaching you how to play chess in the library. Silent focus, from jovial to tense... until *CRONCH*

Raised brows as he meets your blushing features. You scratch your head, nervous for disturbing the silence

He frowns, a smirk tugging his lips, “Did you just make that sound?”

“I didn’t do it on purpose to put you off or anything -“ “Good. Or else i’d have to punish you.”

You try not to combust at the unintentional insinuation

Otherwise lets it slide, finding it ‘odd’ or ‘quirky’, even endearing...

Likes that he’s the first and only brother to know about this ‘quirk’ of yours

Barely notices it/doesn’t mind at all

That is until, you CRONCH in the silence he requires in order to read dense text

He eyes you darkly as you CRONCH for the fourth time in a row - you wince

“Sorry!” A harsh whisper before you creep out to CRONCH your back elsewhere

Smirks as you leave, shaking his head before calling you back in - as though it were an ‘inconvenience’ to do so

Asmodeus 💋

He’d drawn you a bath in his own king sized tub, ready to spoil you rotten for your spa day

You’d sunk into the tub with an appreciative hum as he began rubbing massage oil in your wrists

He’d set the mood PERFECTLY as usual

“How am I supposed to control myself when you sing so sweetly?” Wiggly brows

There wasn’t a crick, nor a crack... BUT A *CRONCH*

He freezes, you peel your eyes open with a suppressed smile. He makes a choked noise, the mood having been shot dead

“Honey... what the hell was that noise?”

Knowing full well it was your wrists that made such a deafening crack

You giggle at his tense expression, as he asks “So are you secretly an eighty year old, or?”

You explain you have joint hypermobility syndrome, which is sometimes painful

After getting over his initial freak out, he pampers you EVEN MORE

“You come to me if it hurts honey, ok?”

Your pain is his pain, though he may not show it, he actually gets intensely upset if something truly hurts you

Beelzebub 🍔

You’re chilling in your room together, with take out from a new chain beside Hell’s Kitchen, both making happy yummy noises as you eat

*CRONCH*

Beel pauses mid bite, but shrugs and keeps eating. Maybe there was lettuce in his burger after all?

You remember - sauce! Can’t eat with Beel without the full experience!

“Hey there’s some Hellfire sauce in the kitchen lemme grab it real quick -“ “:)”

You get up to get it when - *CRONCH* there go your ankles again. Welp.

His eyebrows raise a second, “MC... are you ok?”

You smile, laughing off how that happens sometimes

He frowns in thought before shrugging with a laugh alongside you, “Fair enough.” Seems legit lmao

He’s seen weirder shit and is still unfazed by it so he does not give a flying fuck lol

“As long as it doesnt hurt.” “:)”

If your joints/limbs were particularly sore or even dislocated that day, he would gently scoop you up and carry you anywhere <3

Belphegor 😴

Your napping in his arms as the little spoon, just between wake and sleep as he snuggles into you. You shift to get comfy when *CRONCH*

He freezes, you freeze too, trying not to laugh

“MC...” he begins groggily “What the fuck was that noise you just made?”

You explain sometimes you just CRONCH. It be like that sometimes Belphie, it do

He doesnt believe you, especially since you’re laughing as you explain it

“No really! I’m serious!” “Then why are you laughing?” “Because it’s funny! You’re reaction pfft” “>:(“

“If your weird human body wakes me up i’m not gonna nap with you again.”

He doesnt mean it

*Goes to leave because you CRONCHED* “Well, where do you think you’re going?”

*Visible Confusion* He flashes a cocky grin, “You’re not skipping out on being my Pillow.”

Grabs your CRONCHY wrist and tugs you back under the covers for more snuggles

“But you said -“ “Shut up and sleep”

*Kisses your forehead* “:)” <3

The Undateables ~

Luke 👼

He’s baking treats for you, Beel and Simeon when you offer a hand when you see him sturggle with the tray and *CRONCH*

The Most Disgusted Face TM

Almost drops the tray on your feet

“What in this disgraceful Devildom was that noise, MC?!”

“My joints do that sometimes” with a shrug and laugh as you #Take 2 with the baking

Turns his nose up “That was a horrible noise no wonder the demons love you so much.”

Tries and fails to act prim and proper as he carries the tray from your grasp, only for Beel to tackle the tray and eat the first batch

This ’Chihuahua’ is all bark and no bite, doesnt mean a word

After a silence, he’ll ask quietly, “Are you... hurt by it?” Little blushy face

If no, he’ll smile and turn his attention back to the sweet treats. If yes, he’ll be a sad puppy

“I’m alright, Luke! Don’t worry.” “Ok :)”

Will fight any demon anyone who may question or mock you over it, even though it doesnt bother you

“ChOtTo MaTtE! >:(“ #NotSoSilentProtector

Simeon 😇

Your walking to class together at RAD when he drops his books. You insist on plucking them from the ground for him when *CRONCH*

Surprised Pikachu Face TM

Breaks into That Smile TM and laughs with you at your cronchie knees

“That was... certainly an interesting noise.”

You don’t need to explain, but you do for the record so to speak

He gets weirdly curious about it, Is it all humans? Do you enforce cronchie joints upon your young? Mandatory or compulsory to be a human with cronchie joints? “:’)”

Will try to CRONCH too out of curiosity

It doesn’t go badly per se, but it doesn’t go well either

“Simeon, stop before you hurt yourself.”

Similarly to Beel, is hardly fazed by it at all when considering some shit this boi has seen

“Oooh like what?! *~*” He smiles all Innocent TM “You don’t want to know.”

Innocent my ass

“Now I wanna know more!”

Solomon 🧙‍♂️

He’s showing you some magic to prank the brothers in a sneak attack when *CRONCH*

He eyes you with That Smirk TM and bursts out laughing with you

“Hey! Me too!” *CRONCH* his knuckles

You two start CRONCH Wars

You act out lines of Star Wars to each other ever since and CRONCH, terrifying the Demon Brothers and Purgatory Hall

“MC, I AM your father.” *CRONCH*

Somewhere nearby, Lucifer holds the bridge of his nose with a deep *sigh*

You both sneak attack the others with CRONCHES, scaring the shit out of them

apart from Beel or Satan. They don’t notice or see it coming, respectively

You did it once to Lucifer. You did not want to do it again ... *~*

You start to slowly recruit others to the CRONCH wars, starting with Levi and Mammon

“When will this nonsense end?” “THE CRONCH WARS NEVER END, LUCIFER. NEVEEER.”

Would CRONCH next to you when you’re asleep to freak you out

*CRONCH* “Solomon... why are you in my bedroom?”

Barbatos 🕰

He’s showing you how to prepare the Hellfire cigar rolled cookies so that you can teach Lucifer, when *SPLAT*

...

Jk, it’s ofc a *CRONCH* - but i nearly got ya! haha ok sorry i’ll stop

Anyway, *CRONCH* go your shoulders as you bend over a simmering tray to get a whiff

Your eyes pop open as you hear the sickening crack and Barbatos makes a small surprised choking noise

You lift your gaze with a nervous smile only to see him smirk

“That was a... curious noise, MC.” That small chuckle behind his gloved hand, “Is that a regular occurrence?”

Laughs it off, shrugs. Surprised he didn’t see it coming when he quite literally knows all

Ignores it from then on

However will chuckle behind that glove if the timing is particularly humourous

Will seem unfazed if it hurt you, but his actions would speak for him.

Making you tea and checking on you more frequently, even if you’re not at the palace

Would snark anyone who comments on your CRONCHINESS like the diva he secretly is

Diavolo 👑

You’re visiting the palace on your best behaviour, taking a stroll with Diavolo when *CRONCH*

He’s smiling through a frown as he tries to work out where the noise came from

“Was - was that you, MC?” That Laugh TM head tipped back, tears in his eyes laughing

“Hahah such fun!” *CRONCH*

He CRONCHED his arms to CRONCH with you, only he CRONCHED too far

His arms are stuck in their newfound ‘unsightly’ position

Puppy eyes as he can’t seem to UN-CRONCH

Your turn to burst out laughing, he quickly joins you

Lucifer’s hand flies to his chest when he sees you two return - “MC... did you have something to do with this?” Glare

You flush, about to fight your case when Diavolo steps in with That Smile TM

“I wanted to joint in!” “...” “;)” *FacePalm*

“It was fun, you should try it Lucifer!”

Satan snickers at the double meaning - “Fun? Lucifer doesn’t know how to have fun.”

Diavolo pulls those Sad Puppy Eyes TM

By the end of the night Lucifer literally bent over backwards to make Diavolo happy lolololol

Don’t take these too seriously! Mostly a shit post for the simp club lolol - hope they made you smile! ✨

[lizacstuff]

Liza that 3rd fragman 👀 "if I was born a 100 times I'd fall in love with you everytime" Eda saying this is their last obstacle and nothing can separate them, serkan's "I'll be right back, close your eyes I'm here" If this isn't all a red flag for shits about to hit the fan then I don't know what is LOL (but also how cute to Edser look and them telling each other they love each other very much 😭😭😭)

That fragman is both the SWEETEST and the MOST OMINOUS thing I’ve ever seen. ALL AT ONCE.  

Friends... we’re gonna go through some things.  That being said, everything is going to be great. These writers have been solid so far, and I have faith they have come up with something really interesting to increase the longevity of this show. And I don’t know about you, but I’m prepared to go through some things if it means keeping Eda and Serkan for longer.  (I heart them)

This show is about Eda and Serkan and their love story, at it’s core it’s a comedy, it will all lead to happy things, but... yeah, buckle up! 

I have a lot of asks both about the fragman and last ep, so I’m going to answer a bunch under the cut. 

Anonymous said: The fandom theories about episode 28 have gotten so wild that I literally think the most shocking thing would be if they actually got married and were not separated (emotionally or physically). What if the earlier painful episodes were to make us believe that things couldn't possibly go right in 28 and it's a reverse psychology trick?

You could be right!  I like your thinking. I checked on twitter and I had to back away slowly. The juvenile temper tantrums were too much for me today.  

Look, I think it’s clear something big is coming. It has to, there has to be something that shakes up the show. Some of the theories are more upsetting and catastrophic than others, but the writers won’t do anything that dings either character or their love for one another.  Whatever happens will showcase the connection between these two and the chemistry between the actors, that’s the point of everything, and anything that does those things is gonna be a-okay with me. 

@jan31​ Hi Liza. Do you think we are going to see the wedding in 28 or they will leave it on a cliffhanger for next week. Lots of theories going round mainly cos of Neslihan saying new dimensions coming in episode 29, which could just mean married life etc. I have seen suggestions of memory loss, it's all a dream since episode one. I would personally love Eda to wake up like in episode one but for it to be a total turn around and she is the boss and Serkan the employee. Eda being robot yildiz appeals to me!!! I know it will never happen but leave me here with my dreams!!

I started the day at 90% sure they’ll be married in 28/29, but now I’m down to like 30% that they’ll get married in these episodes. I really, really want them to get married before whatever happens happens, because every scenario I can think of for this reset or starting again, seems like it would be better if they were married.  

However, the shooting spoilers from today, make me question that. Namely the videos where Hande appears to still be wearing the ring on her right hand. We shall see, that could be for many reasons. 

Honestly, though, I wouldn’t hate a memory loss storyline. Seeing one of them (and Serkan’s line in the trailer makes it seem like it might be him) lose their memory and have to fall in love all over again? There are worse fates for a shipper than getting to experience that all again but in a different way.  

Anonymous said: Your response to the fandom drama anon was so good, it's exactly how I feel. While I don't know what the old posts that were like are (that's shady as fuck) I did see all the other drama go down and wow. The actresses def need to stay in their lane and some of the fans, hoooo boy, it's obvious they're young based off their reactions alone. Had to unfollow some people once I realized what they were like. Also some of the IRL shipping reminded me of col*fer stuff, reading into everything and blowing it out of proportion (which then gets picked up by paps....). But you're right in that at least the show related drama is tame compared to OUAT. But still, people being too careless even while they know the paps see everything and harass Kerem and hande (omg did you see the video of hande the other day stopped in the van and she looked so overwhelmed 😔)

You’re referencing this post here about yesterday’s drama. 

Today Neslihan made it worse by addressing everything and claiming she didn’t like all those Hande-bashing posts because... wait for it... she was HACKED. Oy. Hackers got in and went back two years to like gross posts about Hande? Sure, Jan. While I don’t believe that for a second, I guess that at least gives her cover with Hande so they can all pretend it’s true and move on so it’s not awkward on set.  But, yikes, she needs to consult a publicist, she took a narrative that was circulating in certain circles in fandom and made sure all her followers were aware. Not very savvy. 

As for the paps coming after Hande, yes I did see her in the car, she did look overwhelmed. Back off vultures!!! That’s why I think Kerem sometimes throws himself to the wolves so that doesn’t happen. She always handles them like a pro, but you can tell she’d rather be anywhere else on earth than talking to them. 

The pap stuff is worse than I’ve seen before, they’re like vultures circling for any conjecture (sometimes made up out of thin air) they can turn into a question and blame fans. OUAT actors dealt with nothing like this. Also I can’t believe they never ask about the show. Like after last week? They could legit ask about the sex scene which probably would have given them some angle on the actors that they wanted, (especially since it was too hot for Turkish TV) but they let that pass them by, and instead asked the same questions about being together that they never answer. Dumbasses. They are not only awful people, they are awful at their jobs. 

In Van, the paps pay off crew members for info, they always know more than fans. Also I don’t remember stars of my shows getting this level of tabloid attention before. Except for on Riverdale, Lili and Cole generated that level of interest, and while I didn’t pay terribly close attention to them, I feel like they rarely talked to the paps, were just photographed. Also I don’t suspected the CW of calling the paps on them, but I suspect either the network or production company of sometimes calling them on Hande and Kerem. 

Anonymous said: Do you think it’s weird that they didn’t touch the kidnapping at all in either trailer? They might not have filmed it in time for the 1st one but certainly the 2nd. And I’m definitely not complaining about the ones we got because its like a fairytale but the kidnapping was the cliffhanger...? 🧐 I think they should’ve just left the princes storyline at “he went back to his country” but then they didn’t so......

If they’d left his story at just going back to his country, then the Prince really wouldn’t have served his purpose. He was brought on to cause some sort of trouble, so they probably need him to cause the trouble before he goes, lets hope it ends with this kidnapping!

And to answer your question, yes, I do think it’s weird that neither trailer touched on it. On any other show I’d think it was a huge red flag, but on this show maybe not as much because  a) there’s obviously a lot of romance in this episode, it’s not crazy that they are focusing on that to draw people in with the promos  b) this show likes to do cliffhangers that end up being no big deal, that happens a lot.  

Who knows it could turn out to be a big deal that shapes the rest of the episode in some unexpected way (Eda’s captured the whole episode and she’s dreaming about wedding prep, or... who knows) but I think it’s more likely that they resolve in the first 5-10 minutes and then move on.  Since we know from the summary (not that I trust those) that Serkan goes on the bachelor weekend, it feels like the Prince is taken care of prior to that. I don’t think he’d leave her alone for a second if there was a chance the Prince was still a threat. Perhaps Babaanne is pissed he tried to kidnap Eda and tells them she’ll handle it herself???

Anonymous said: Semiha not being in the promo is highkey suspicious. The actress is promoting the episode lol. She's about to Evil Queen this wedding ceremony but you know what, I'm fine with whatever she has planned if they end up married at the end of the day. What's funny is that since a lot of fans these days will assume that there will be shocking negative plot twists, not actually having one here would be a plot twist so I hope the writers keep them together for whatever's next haha

You’re not wrong, at this point, having this wedding take place would be a shocking twist for all of us!  As for Semiha... hmmm... it will be interesting to see what her reaction is to Eda being kidnapped by her pick of suitor. Serkan Bolat might be the son of the man indirectly responsible for her parents death, but he would never hurt her. Take note, Grandbag!  

Anonymous said: Do you mind sharing your speculative scenarios?

After the trailer today, I don’t know if I can even remember some of them. 

Memory loss

Grandma forces Serkan to choose between Eda and his company/wealth,  he chooses Eda and they start over from scratch with nothing

Time jump

AU starting over, showing a different path they might have taken together

Dream

These actors playing different characters in a new story

I don’t think the last three are likely, but they did spring to mind after some of Neslihan’s teases. 

Anonymous said: So this show doesn't get like fantastic ratings (it actually seems to be on the lower end compared to all other dizis airing) but the social media engagement is off the charts. Why is that?!? Is the show just extraordinarily popular internationally? or that this is a "shipping" show? I'm floored by the numbers - its like no other show/fandom is even trying

The ratings were terrific during the summer. But to your point, it has a huge fandom both in Turkey and internationally, but it’s worth noting that most of those charts you see where it beats every other show in every imaginable social metric is just for Turkey.  

It’s one of those lightning in a bottle situations where you get the right property and the right actors together at the right time and magic happens.  And, for sure, the number one reason is the shipping. Shipping drives fandom engagement, and a fantastic ship with a juicy, fun, tropey love story is what this show offers. It also offers up two extremely attractive, talented, likeable leads with off-the-charts chemistry (plus the added speculation about an off-camera relationship that has intrigued more than a few fans, tabloids and gossip sites and fueled interest) who have done a good job of building the fanbase through their social media engagement. Plus the timing is part of it as well. I don’t know about you, but this show hit the spot during this pandemic and the horror of 2020. We all needed this escape. 

Anonymous said:Do you think something happened in the writers room after the backlash of 25 and fan disappointment after Ayse's announcement? I feel like a switch flipped and now we're in fanficland with how much good content we've gotten in these last two episodes. Like I thought maybe they should wrap up the series soon before the characters got completely off the tracks but they may be finding their groove now and I'm interested to see what their next twist is after they can write out Balca/Seymen.

I don’t know about a switch flip, this show has been fanfic land since the first episode!  The tropes! That is how I described it to multiple people when I first started watching: an AU fanfic come to life.

As for the writing changes, no, I don’t think backlash after 25 affected 26 or 27, because 26 was already 90% shot, and 27 already written. However, I assume they themselves could tell that 25 got just too dark and had strayed pretty far from the DNA of the series. While I didn’t think it was bad, it was not fun to watch and this show ought to be fun to watch. 

Let’s hope, however, that the backlash affects future episodes in that they know what works... and what doesn’t.  The last two episodes definitely felt reminiscent of the first batch of episodes. Light, funny, romantic. If they can keep that tone... I’ll be thrilled.

Anonymous said: i didn't realize how much i missed "together" edser until watching 27.. it's been so long since they were "officially" together and we also had such few episodes of it.. ppl have been comparing it to 12 and while in some ways i agree, edser are always so different here than they were there. 12 was them navigating their new relationship.. they were more shy and finding their footing.. here they are very much established, as they should be after knowing their love for so long in comparison to 12!

Yes, it was lovely. You know I’ve preached a lot about how even though Eda and Serkan were broken up, they’ve still been together all this time. And it’s true, but there is something about them truly being together that is magical. We never got enough of that the first time around (a writing mistake in my opinion) and they’re so good together it’s lovely to watch. 

Anonymous said: Serkan not asking for help from Balca when asking his team for help with the marriage gifts preparations and refusing her offer of help when she asked made me so happy. Good job Serkan! He's learning! She's not trustworthy!

Yes, that was a good moment. And he was eyeing her very warily when she offered. The thing I don’t understand is how has no one caught on that she’s working with Babaanne? That entire office is filled with nosy people, has no one remarked on the number of times Balca has gone up to the office or they’ve disappeared for lunch at the same time? Come on Leyla! Come on Melo! Notice these things!  

Anonymous said: Fingers crossed that we finally make progress towards getting rid of Seiman & Balca now that all the girls were drugged and Eda was put in the car in the last episode. Unless Seiman has a change of heart and takes Eda back inside before anyone wakes & the guys get there then the show has to address it. Although I do not think Balca is going to back down unless Serkan straight up tells her he has zero interest in her and never will. Totally fine if that happens in the next episode.

Will Balca backdown even if she’s humiliated like that? She’s so delusional I’m not sure. What I am sure is that she’s dangerous. This came in before we saw the other two fragmans that have no mention of the kidnapping. Hard to picture how that is so easily resolved. Unless she frees herself (which seems unlikely in her groggy state) or maybe Melo’s future boyfriend is able to stop it before they get far?  Or I don’t know. I just know that I want to see Serkan lose his mind and all the other characters see Serkan lose his mind and then I want it to be over. LOL.

Anonymous said: As much as I am loving everything Edser, I cannot wait for Seiman, Balca and Grandma to be gone. And I am even more annoyed to think that the show might try to redeem all 3 characters. All 3 of them are truly awful people and no need to waste air time trying to make the audience think any different. Just my opinion...🤷🏻‍♀️. Show please finally expose those 3 for the psychos they are and get rid of them.

Bye bitches!  I don’t think there’s any redemption for Balca and Seiman. They both have poisoned/dosed people, hard to come back from that.  And there is no need to redeem them because neither is compelling enough to be a long-term character. But maybe Granny, we probably will see a redemption arc for her. 

Anonymous said: i know you were worried a few weeks ago that with ayse leaving as writer, we probably wouldn't have the same sort of comedy as previous episodes... but istg the whole kiz isteme scene, especially with chef alex, had me almost crying with laughter. especially when serkan off the cuff just goes "well if that's an option..." to everyone misunderstanding alex "wanting" ayfer for 2 nights and then eda ready to beat him with the flowers he bought her... comedic gold lmao.

SO GOOD! I was thrilled to see that sort of comedy, the sort of comedy we’d come to expect, from these writers. I think it bodes very well indeed!  

That scene was amazing. I know Neslihan said that much of it was improvised. Probably that line from Serkan (since Serkan is SO out-of-his-mind in love I’m not sure he could even joke about having Eda only two nights a week! LOL) was improv from Kerem, and Aydan asking about the other nights, and Seyfi bringing up the weekend. And Eda’s very Hande-esque “Ser-KAN.” 

I just love rewatching that scene and checking out everyone who is breaking character and just losing it. Cagri most of all. He’s blurred aback there but you can see Ferit spends the whole time laughing or trying to stifle a laugh. Reminds me of Cagri in the scene in 18 when they’re watching the security footage he was losing it in that scene as well. 

Anonymous said: i'm scared - I think they are really about to give us all of these happy EdSer scenes only to have something happen RIGHT before the wedding ceremony due to Babaanne. Based on the last episode, I don't think there's any chance of a breakup (knock on wood) but what if Serkan gets arrested, goes to jail for 2 years, and we get a time jump?

This was sent before the last two teasers, so yes I think something is gonna happen. We shall see!  I don’t really think Serkan going to jail for 2 years is in the cards, at least I hope not!  Besides if Babaanne did that she would have no hopes of ever reconciling with Eda, so that seems unlikely she’d follow through and leave him there for so long a time. 

Anonymous said: With the last week's sex scene, they did a lot of fade outs but the scene was basically still there so it wasn't much wasted effort for the actors. But for what they're teasing in episode 28 - idk how they can get away with showing them in the shower at all if Serkan lifting Eda with her clothes on had required blurring? Is Eda dropping her robe even pushing it? It's intriguing indeed.

Great questions. We’re 36 hours from finding out (well I'm longer than that because I wait for the English subs, hee hee) All I know is I want to see these scenes.. one way or another! 

[moonbelt]

»the moon, the sun

↳ ex-best-friends to lovers au | college athletes au

pairing » jeon jungkook | reader

genre » big angst + fluff + sexual themes

word count » 11.770

» there’s not a single thing you like about jungkook. no. not his jokes or his thinly veiled overwatch obsession or his supreme swimmers body. absolutely nothing. there is, however, a multitude of things you hate. wait, sorry that was rude, vehemently despise is better. 

 » mutual pining that could've been resolved if either of them exercised some basic communication skills lol, mild coarse language, lots of angst, cocky jjk but also crack jjk??, gamer memes, poufy haired jjk, also supposed hate-love relationship. 

YOU ARRIVE AT THE SWIM CENTER WITH A THROB in your knee and a resounding ache in your head. It felt like your brain was about to explode into a thousand gory pieces as you pushed open the wide frost-tinted glass double doors that led to the locker rooms.

Now that would have been a great start to a low-budget horror flick. You could just picture it, a lonesome girl? No… Woman? At twenty, you weren’t sure if you still qualified as a girl but the term woman felt too formal, too stifling, too mature to be attributed to you. But whatever, that was semantics you could spare for another day.

So, there you’d be; creeping into a university swim center at the ass-crack of dawn and then bam! Your brain impedes on itself. Maybe it’s because of some mutant phenomenal viral disease, maybe it’s repercussions from tempering with a portal to the paranormal realm that only exists in semi-open pool arenas. Whatever it was, it would have to be epic and a far cry from the truth. Which was, you were used to indescribable, continuous pain. It came with the territory of being an athlete. If you didn’t wake up in the morning with some part of your body feeling uncomfortably off then that just meant you didn’t try as hard the day before. Or at the very least, that’s what you told yourself to keep going.

Yawning, you punched in your locker code and began the mental and physical process of getting ready for the next three hours of practice before break. You usually where the first one in the building and the last one to leave if you didn’t have classes or work.

Swimming made you feel good, made you feel like there was something special about yourself. It didn’t help that the more you practiced, the more you were able to outpace everyone else. Practice birthed results and your stubbornness, wait no, competitiveness was off the charts. So, of course, you wanted to dominate every single athlete in your division.

Still though, waking up at four in the morning had to be the singular dumbest thought you’d ever conceived.

Once you were suited up, you padded back into the arena that held the huge industrial sized swim pool. The overpowering smell of chlorine and humid air made you feel more at home than the dormitory you’d just left less than thirty minutes ago. You honestly might’ve started crying right then and there at the sight of the crystal clear water and the humongous life-sized painting of an unknown swimmer in the midst of a beautiful breaststroke at the center of it all.

Today was after all the first day of the semester. Your collegiate swimming career was finally back on. Your lips twinged at the sight of the polished, tiled floor and how it felt cool under the soles of your feet.

You’d gone back home for winter break and although you’d kept up with the training regime your coach had persistently emailed out, there was just something fundamentally different about being back on your own turf. In fact, you were fairly sure a few tears slipped past your barriers and hooked at the corners of your eyes at the thought. Only to be blasted into near oblivion by the sound of a phone camera going snap snap.

You whipped your head to the direction of the camera like a person possessed. “What the fuck?”

“Oh, My Zelda. This is glorious.” The goddamn stalker, wait he wasn’t a stalker if he was a member of the swim team. Right, the goddamn fiend had the guts and audacity to say with an open-mouthed grin marring his face. “You’re actually crying. There are literally tears in your eyes. I can see ‘em.”

“Screw off, Jeon.”

Him. The only other person dumb enough to be at the swimming center at five am. A full hour before the scheduled practice time. God, how long had he been watching you? And to think he even had time to whip out his phone and document this moment. You were never gonna live it down, that was for sure. You? Crying? Over – you took a grand look around your surroundings – water?

“It was only three weeks, you know. You wouldn’t die if you didn’t swim for a month or two.” He still found the whole scenario funny, if the laughter in his voice was any indication.

“Coming from someone that I doubt showers even once every three days? Yeah, I’ll pass on that lecture.”

“Ooh, a solid burn from the Ice Queen,” he clutched a hand to his chest like he’d been shot with a bazooka or something. Dramatic. “That one hurts my ego immensely.”

You snorted. It was debatable if anything could seriously damage Jeon Jungkook’s ego. That shit was built with solid uranium. No matter how you tried to smash it. He was his own number one supporter and he’d built himself up in his head that he was the greatest at whatever he laid his hands on. At that moment, however, you wanted to snatch the iPhone out of those deft hands of his and dig a well through his head with it. Couldn’t he go be great somewhere else?

Instead of replying and subsequently dragging out this conversation longer than necessary, you busied yourself with adjusting your swim cap and bringing your goggles to rest on the bridge of your nose.

It didn’t matter that Jungkook was here. It didn’t bother you one bit. It’s not like it was abnormal. You’d known him longer than you’d known anybody so of course you were used to his presence. Although you didn’t particularly like the fact that you’d known him almost your whole life. Or the fact that your body prickled with awareness every time he stepped into the nearest vicinity. You couldn’t control that. What you could control though, was how you felt about it.

And right now, you hated him. Wait, no hate was too strong a word, perhaps vehemently despise was more fitting.

You make your way to lane five, take a deep breath to calm your nerves and then dunk yourself into the ice cold water. Better to get it over with than squirm around the edges with him around. For Zelda’s sake, he has his phone camera on standby!

Yeah okay, you didn’t hate Jeon Jungkook; the son of a family friend that lived on the other side of the cul de sac. Instead, you vehemently despised the boy that was a walking, talking human critic. You bite your lip ferociously in a bid to punish the thought of Jungkook out of your mind. After a second or maybe three, you push into the water.

“Your shoulders look tense from up here... you’re so not gonna perform well if you don’t stretch that baby out.”

That’s the first thing you hear other than the rushing of water leaving your ears as your face breaks out against the surface of the pool. You jerk your goggles off your eyes, look up and scowl at him. Mr. I-Should-Basically-Be-A-Coach-With-All-These-Pointers-I-Give.

“I am not tense.”

“Yeah, no. You don’t have to lie about that. I could legit see your muscles almost cramping up down there.”

“Are you really going to stand up there and pretend we have some kind of mentor-mentee relationship going on? Seriously? It’s five in the morning, Jeon.”

You could clearly see the wheels in his head turning and then zeroing in on the one word you shouldn’t have said. Relationship. Gah, you need a chastity belt for your lips. His eyes basically sparkle with rays of mischief and a dash of mastered superiority. “Well, I am seven months older, so when you think about it that way it’s only natural that I take you under my wing and —”

“I swear to you, I will physically break your knee caps —”

“Wait,” he looks genuinely confused, perfect lips pouting. “What do you mean by physically? Is there any other way to break a knee?”

Ugh! You stare at him and he stares right back, cocking his head to the side like he can do this all day. You want to scream, hell maybe even shapeshift into a fucking banshee and scream the roof off this building.

And then his mouth curves into a roguish smirk. The type he reveals when he manages to squeak by a better time than you or like that one time (okay maybe five?) that he got randomly stopped by some modeling agency recruiter when your parents had forced the two of you to carpool to swim meets back when you were a tad younger and he was the only one with a car. The smirk that just screams ‘I’m getting under your skin, aren’t I? And dude, it feels fan-fucking-tastic.’

“Get a life, Jeon. Or better yet, get in the water. It’s only been three weeks, no way you suck even worse than usual after that. I mean, by fuck, it hasn’t even been a month!” You twist his words back at him and then feel proud about it. So what, you are competitive and you hold grudges. There could be worse things.

His smirk deepened and okay, you won’t lie to yourself. He is attractive. Critically so. It would be hard not to notice that. It’s a continual and conscious effort to even attempt to un-notice it. But still, moments like these when the fluorescent lights beamed on his face at just the right angle and the shadows cut across his features and illuminated his golden skin to the heavens, boosting his overall aura like he was some sort of reincarnated god of beauty. Or worse, a Final Boss that you had to most certainly defeat. It became increasingly hard not to notice how much he affected you and your breathing.

Yeah, it’s in these moments that your better judgement faults and for a split second you are transported to that one November night in the middle of eleventh grade when fuck no! Absolutely not! You refuse to walk that horrendous trip down memory lane and relive one of the most humiliating, and this is coming from a girl that threw up because of nerves in front of judges at a talent show, experiences of your life. This was not the time.

“Your shoulders are still stiff as a board. Tell me, child, have you gotten laid recently?”

You let out the most frustrated sound of agony you could muster. You’re going to murder him. Forget you being the star in some crazy horror film, you were going to be the director. And you were gonna serve up a mean case of Deck Jungkook’s Ass With Supernatural Intervention as the main course. Maybe you’d win an Oscar for it. Heck, maybe you’d get a home run and even win Best Picture.

He chuckles like he’s cracked the greatest joke since Netflix Original Films. You’re too busy orchestrating a slugfest in your head to really pay attention. “I’ll take that as a negative.”

You barely manage to spit out a dignified response. “One of these days I’m going to seriously maim you.”

“Tsk tsk, you and your threatening bodily harm tendencies. I wonder if that’s like a kink thing?” He asks as he taps his chin with his forefinger and squats down to a level that is closer to you. His dark brown hair that looks almost a shade of black sways like a river to his beat. This is much better, it hurt your neck staring up at him like he was some guardian deity.

But the action happens to highlight the ridiculous tightening of his abs. The abs you’ve painstakingly not ogled at because they are sculpted beauties. Hell, you’ve yet to meet a swimmer's body that isn’t the epitome of fitness but Jungkook’s is different. He is carved. Probably why you don’t like looking at it, stare too much and he might notice and of course, you wouldn’t want that happening.

“Jeon?”

“Hmm?” He sounds so innocent. The liar.

“Shut up before I drown you. I don’t care how long you can hold your breath. I will send you down to hell personally.”

He wiggled his eyebrows like the concept of hell was all he’d ever wanted to discuss in life. “Does that mean you’d be coming with? Fascinating. Let’s make a road trip out of it. Maybe you’ll even find some demons down to fuck all that tension out of your body. You know, DDTF. Get your exophilia on, if that’s your thing.”

Exo-what?

Beat. He’s beaten you at your own game. How the heck are you supposed to reply something snarky when all he ever does is blow the thing to epic proportions and have you running in circles. This is why the best strategy was just to simply ignore him.

You shoot him one last look that you hope is as menacing as it ought to be. You yank your goggles from resting on your forehead and dunk them in the water to get the fog out. Placing it back gingerly across your eyes, you let take in a soothing breath.

“I am serene. I am calm. There is nothing around me in existence that bothers me. I am the pinnacle of collected.” You refrain from adding tense-free.

There’s no way you’re tense after running the three and a half miles between your dorm and the swim center. You repeat the words aloud twice before you actually believe them. And then you tear back into the water. You still have roughly thirty minutes before the rest of the team comes in for practice. You’ll be damned spending all your time talking to the fool with shaggy hair and a crooked smile that made you want to burn something.

The only sound other than the whoosh in your ears and the rapid pumping of your heart as you exert yourself is the uncanny, blistering laughter of Jeon Jungkook. At least someone was enjoying your torment.

You swore at that moment that you were going to deck him someday. Even if it was the last thing you ever did. Maybe not even physically, gah, but you were going to get a time so fast, so unbelievably better that Jungkook would be dumbstruck in awe and lagging to catch up. You grin at the thought.

   By the time practice comes to an end, your knee has migrated from a troublesome ache to a colossal titan. Dragging your body out of the water proves to be much a greater task that you previously took for granted. You try and fail to hold back your groans as you attempt to not limp back to the locker rooms and take a shower. Also, you need a painkiller stat.

The coach is too busy being circled by the hyena pack that is freshmen to really pay any attention to you. However, you know better than to think you’ve slipped past his radar. He’s definitely going to catch you sometime later to rim your ass for going too hard the first day of the semester. You guess that makes him a great coach in the grand scheme of things but you’d rather he let you be.

“Your knee acting up again?” Your lane buddy and a veteran senior in the program, Seokjin asks as he saddles up next to you and rips the navy blue swim cap off his head. You fear a little bit for his hair. “I thought doc cleared it?”

You sigh, not really wanting to remember last year when the university-affiliated doctor told you that you needed to take three months off swimming to heal and you’d barely lasted two weeks without going insane. You shiver at the horror of it all as you wrap your Legend of Zelda limited edition Link towel around your dripping body.

“Yeah, he did.” You send him a smile that comes off like a wince and then you give up on trying to downplay the pain altogether. “Guess it’s just not doing so hot today.”

Seokjin nods solemnly like he understands. “Some days are worse than others. I get that.”

“It be like that. I’ll be fine.”

“Do you think you’d be set for March though? Coach’s probably going to start analyzing his final picks for the comp.”

Ugh, Goddess of the Sea take me now! The National Collegiate Swim Competition is an annual event held every March and even though you’d made the cut as a naïve freshman, a knee injury caused you to be sidelined in your second year. But now though, you have to get on the final lineup. An absolute must.

Your cold heart won’t take it to be on the stands watching your teammates accomplish something you dreamed of. Something you’d worked and sacrificed so much for. You won’t stand to watch Jungkook rub it in your face how he’d come in a mere 0.6 seconds away from the first position. And you definitely won’t stand to have another year put on hold when your dream is literally right in front of you.

You bite out a laugh that sounds foreign even to your own ears. God, your knee is killing you. “You know what they say about pain.”

Seokjin gives you a quizzical look. Like he, in fact, has no idea what you mean. And you’re about to launch into a tirade about exercise mottos when you feel a tall presence step up behind you. You don’t even have to turn around to know it’s him. Of course, it’s him. Who else would encroach in on your personal space without a second thought?

“She means she’s gonna push through her limping and her tense as fuck shoulders and pull a win out of her ass. Don’t you,” the way he says your name is so patronizing, so unbelievably condescending that you whip your head up to glare at him.

“That’s impossible. If anyone knows how to take care of their body and not push their limits to insanity it’s Y/N.” Seokjin appears appalled that Jungkook would even think of such a thing. But Jungkook knows you better than anyone, albeit hatefully.

“Mm-hm. You doubt how crazy obsessed she is with winning.”

“Says you,” you spit out but it lacks your usual snark.

In truth, maybe Jungkook was right about your shoulders not being as stretched out as they should’ve been. They feel sore and they almost gave out on you during a lap. You were basically running on guts and mental fortitude for the last four laps. But you’d rather swallow butcher knives than admit that aloud for his ears to hear.

Seokjin is oblivious to the simmering tension between the two of you. Instead, he turns to you with so much concern sweeping through his posture it makes you uncomfortable and yet happy at the same time. “Take care of yourself, Y/N. There’s no point in winning if your body crashes on you, yeah?”

You know he means well and it’s not like you like lying to your senior but you know he just won’t get where you’re coming from. “Yeah,” you stare down at the suddenly interesting aqua-tiled floor.

He pats your shoulder once before he turns down the other way to the male locker rooms leaving you and Jungkook alone. You’re about to go on your own merry way — agonizingly slow of course, when a hand latches to your upper arm and stops you.

You swear you shouldn’t feel anything but your skin almost scorches at the contact. Your brain is divided: a part of you wants him to never let go, while the other half can’t get away from him fast enough. You don’t breathe, heck you don’t even move.

“Winning isn’t everything.”

You don’t mean to — truly, you don’t — but a scoff slips out of your lips before you even register it. “Coming from the golden boy that basically has a clear shot at making the lineup? Yeah, I won’t drink to that anytime soon.”

Jungkook uses his free hand to run through his hair like a maniac. And you entertain the idea that perhaps you really do get under his skin as much as he does you. The thought elates you and dilutes the throbbing in your knee to a lesser degree. He’s your biggest tormentor and you can only dream to be the same thing for him. Equivalent exchange and all that jazz.

He clicks his tongue at you and somehow that infuriates you even more. “You know what? Do whatever you want. Ruin your body for all I care.” He lets go of your arm like it’d be painful to hold it any longer. He pulls at the towel he has around his shoulders so hard that even you feel the burn and then he drapes it over his head, effectively blocking you out.

A forgotten part of you wonders why he’s so concerned about your body anyway. It’s not like he should care at all.

The two of you aren’t friends. Once upon a time that wasn’t the case but you aren’t one to cry over spilled milk much less bemoan over it. But it still rubs you some kind of way that Jungkook thinks it’s normal to voice his concern to you. The two of you are not close like that. At least, not anymore.

You scowl to yourself as you weave your way back to the locker room. You’re not much of a talker but you wave back at a few of the girls that bother to look your way. And spend a good ten minutes talking to a freshman about how she needs to stop holding her breath for long periods because all that does is make you dizzy and liable to pass out. After all that, it’s no wonder that you’re the last one out of the showers.

Tugging your baby blue beanie tight across your forehead, you curse yourself for forgetting to pack your knee brace when you left your dorm this morning. But whatever, you’ll push through it. You always do.

What you’re not expecting is to see a lithe body resting on the bench right outside the swim center.  And it strikes you as odd that you immediately know in your gut that it’s Jungkook. Even though you’re too chicken now to admit it, there was a time when you’d engraved his whole body into your mind like he was a science project you were desperately in need of completing. Although his body has since gained more muscle mass and reduced way more body fat, it’s still him. No matter how hard you try to burn him out of your memory, he never leaves. You fear your only remedy might be self-induced amnesia.

What you’re not expecting is for that body clad snugly in black sweatpants, a really oversized navy sweatshirt that has ‘I AM NOT GONNA BE MERCY’ branded in fine print across his chest, and a beanie that suspiciously matches the one on your own head, to turn up and catch your gaze like he knows you’ve been staring.

You blink once and then twice and then once more just to be sure. Weird. You have no idea why he’s waiting out here and you’re even more confused as to why he owns a beanie that looks way too much like yours to be a coincidence. You shift your gaze to the sidewalk, debating if it’s worth it to strike a conversation with him. All it will do is leave you irritated, so you decide to continue to your dorm instead. Screw him and whatever he’s out in this cold as shit weather for.

“What? You’re just gonna ignore me now?”

Huffing, you pretend he’s not matching his strides to your sluggish pace.

“This is cold, even for you.”

Maybe if you keep quiet he’ll think you’ve gone magically inept in the span of forty minutes?

“You know I thought I was doing a good thing by waiting for you.”

That gets you to break your mental battle. “I didn’t ask you to do that, Jeon.”

“I know that. But what if you slid across the pavement and went straight to the dimension of hell? I have to be there for that.” He sounds genuinely invested in the matter at hand.

“I can still walk perfectly fine, thank you very much.” You almost smack your head dead against the stoned ground when your foot snags a loose edge of the sidewalk. Fuck.

“Pfft.” He’s barely holding in his laughter but you don’t cower. Har-dee-har-har. You don’t need him breathing down your neck thinking he’s doing you a favor or anything.

You don’t need pity parties hosted by Jeon Jungkook. Not again. Not after that one night that you thought was perfect and monumental when in reality all it really was a blip in his radar. You’re nothing special, or at least Jungkook thought so. It’s been years since then but that’s the funny thing about pain. It doesn’t just die down because you refuse to think about it. It simmers, it boils, it festers. Pain is a living, breathing monster and simply because you don’t devote time to it doesn’t mean it’s not taking up space under your bed.

But you are not going to think about it. Because you are definitely over it. Yep. That was it. You are over your ex-best friend and you are happy... Bah, what-fucking-ever.

Maybe he realizes that you’re not in the mood for the snark he would normally throw your way because the walk back to your dorm is relatively quiet after that. This is the most civil the two of you have been in a long while. Most of times the both of you are too busy making jabs at each other. But you’d noticed that ever since your accident last year that busted your knee, he’s been different.

You’ve yet to decide if that difference is for good or bad but it doesn’t matter because you’re back at your dormitory which means you get to sleep the rest of the day before work. Yes, maybe there is a God.

“Look, take care of yourself, okay?”

You stop on the stone steps to take him in. His hands stuffed deep in his pockets, the January chill making the tip of his nose bright red but his eyes don’t hold the same mischievous fight as before. He’s determined. You know him well enough to know that.

“I’m not going to die climbing up some stupid stairs.”

He shakes his head. Guess he’s not up for jokes then. “I mean it,” he breathes your name out with so much seriousness it stuns you. “You can be cruel to me. You can be angry at me. But don’t take it out on your body. Just... don’t.”

What does he know about cruelty? He knows not jack shit about cruelty. Cruelty was a seventeen-year-old girl waxing poetic love to a boy that she thought hung the moon, the stars and the sun only for him to trample over it just because. Maybe it was the hormones, maybe it was the timing, maybe it was every fucking thing in between but that night had been a changing point. Horror movies weren’t half as scary as being rejected by your best friend since before you were five and not know why. Cruelty was not whatever this limbo you and Jungkook had. You’d experienced cruelty and that was far worse.

“You don’t get to tell me what to do. Not then and certainly not now.”

Pushing your body to its limits is something you have to do. Getting better at swimming is something you would die trying to attain. Not because you particularly love swimming all that much but rather because it’s the one thing, the only thing that you really do believe you can beat Jungkook in. The only thing you can compete with him and with hard work win. You have to win. You can’t stand being second place next to him. It makes you want to gag. It makes you revert back to that seventeen-year-old girl you thought you’d killed off in your origin story.

Pathetic, you think to yourself. But you won’t stop because you’ve already come so far.

You rush up the stairs and into the dorm like lightning. You’re so quick that you don’t even feel any twinge of pain ricocheting from your knee or anywhere else to be honest. You’re a running painkiller. You haul ass all the way to your room and it’s only when you’ve locked the door and released the longest sigh of your whole adult life that it hits you.

And here’s another thing about pain: it always comes rushing back.

If it’s even possible, over the next few weeks your knee becomes even worse of a problem. Waking up in the morning becomes more of a drag than usual, you can barely walk to your classes much less the swim center without your brace on and then perform a Mission Impossible skit so that the rest of the team doesn’t see the brace dangling in your locker. You’re seriously considering ripping the whole joint out. For Zelda’s sake, it has to hurt significantly less, right?

To make matters worse you’re basically lying out of your ass to Seokjin and the rest of the team that your knee is not bothering you one bit. You’re such a liar, someone needs to lock you up for it. But it’s already the end of February and you can already taste the end of it all. All you need to do is hold on by the skin of your teeth for the next couple of days and then you’ll be free. Sure, rationally you know you’re not swimming your best right now but that does nothing to deter you from what you’ve set your mind on.

“Hey, Y/N,” the voice of the Student Assistant, Namjoon stops you in your attempt to blend in with the other swim members exiting the building after a rather rough day. “You came in later than usual today. Something up?”

Namjoon is an amazing guy. Attentive but not too overbearing. A great listener but he doesn’t go overboard with trying to get you to confess your deep, darkest fears to him. But even with knowing all of this, you still don’t want to tell him a thing. You know he’ll understand, that’s not the problem. The problem is, he would seriously blow it out of proportion. All you want to do is head home, nap for a good hour or three and then head to your afternoon class and get back to crashing. Was that too much to ask?

“Yeah, I’m great. Just a little tired.”

He raises an eyebrow at you, flipping through the sheet on his clipboard. “Hmm, your times been dropping since last week. You sure everything’s fine?”

Fuck. You fumble thinking of an answer, your eyes skittering around the tiled floor till you look up and lock on Jungkook staring right back. He’s a few feet away near the front door discussing with one of the assistant coaches but for some reason, his big, brown eyes are glued to your frame. An inane section of your brain wants to beg him to come over and rescue you from lying so horribly to Namjoon. While another insane part of you wants to sneer at him and tell him to stop freaking looking at you when you’re at your worst.

“I... uh,” you stutter and return your attention back to the kind senior in front of you. “I’m fine. I promise.”

Namjoon cocks an eyebrow at you, disbelieving. “Is it your knee? We could get the team doctor — ”

Your eyes widen in alarm and you stumble away from him, your thoughts passing the point of loudness and encroaching into deafness. No way. There’s no way you’re going to let him bring up your injury and then take it up with the other coaches because you know — deep in your bones — that if he does that you won’t make the cut for the lineup talk less of being able to just attend practice. You’d be kept on the side like an invalid.

Hate.

You hate it. Your stupid knee, the stupid way you were running late to practice almost a full year ago and then proceeded to fall down a flight of stairs and dislocate your knee so bad that when the seasons shift from sunny to cloudy, your knee throbs like an ingrained weather alert.

You hate how much the pain makes you want to cry. You hate yourself for pushing yourself, even more, when you know you shouldn’t. You hate how everyone is so damn concerned about you like you somehow deserve it. You hate that you don’t deserve their kindness, not when every other athlete next to you is getting better and better by the second and you don’t want to be left behind.

“Bro, she’ll be fine.” You don’t realize your savior and yet tormentor has weaseled his way into the conversation until you you hear the soft timbre of his voice. He stands so close to you that you smell the sweet scent of vanilla from his clothes. “I mean, look at her. Her technique is still kicking ass, no one can touch her when it comes to form.”

Lips wobbling a little under the pressure of your teeth, you peer up at him. Your mind running a mile a minute trying to place what his endgame is. Why is he here? What does he think he’s doing?

Namjoon laughs, his features becoming even more stunning with the action and you glance away from Jungkook. There’s no way he bought that blatant form of flattery. “That is true. Y/N has the best technique in the program right now. Probably best in the state.”

Lies. You know there’s talk about some super senior at a neighboring powerhouse school being the best in your division. But your mind is clogged up with your loud thoughts that you don’t say anything to refute his claim.

“Anyways, let me know if you need anything, ‘Kay?” Namjoon demands your attention. “Take it easy and rest up this weekend.”

You nod profusely and Namjoon smiles at the action like your adorable. You frown at that. And then he’s gone and you’re stuck with Jungkook and the thoughts clamoring around in your head.

“I didn’t need you to save me. Or lie for me.”

“Sure,” he says but his eyes say something different. That maybe if you really didn’t want his help you shouldn’t have looked at him like a deer in headlights practically begging the floor to swallow you up. “And I wasn’t lying. You do have a better technique.”

You roll your shoulders, ignoring the praise. “Seriously. I was fine.”

“Fine my ass,” he mutters, pushing past your body and heading outside the door.

“I didn’t need your help and I don’t owe you —” The frigid air whips across your cheeks so hard that you have to stop and close your eyes for a beat. When you peel them back open you find Jungkook looking down at you without something akin to disappointment swimming in his eyes. “What?”

He stares at you for what seems like an eternity. You try not to break away from his gaze but your eyes skittle across his outfit. The beanie on his head that outrageously still looks similar to the one you have on, his grey padded jacket and a similar shade of sweatpants. And by the time your eyes reach back to his face, his focus has diverted to glaring needles at your knee.

“What?” You repeat, this time though you’re whispering like you might not like what he will say next.

“I don’t get it. You of all people know how horrible last year was. Why are you doing this to yourself?”

You suck in a deep breath, not wanting to relive your sophomore year. “Why do you care?”

“Why?” Jungkook practically stutters at the question, his already big doe eyes transforming into the size of craters. “Are you trying to prove something? To who? Me?”

“I don’t care about you, Jeon. And I don’t need to prove any single thing to you. You’re dead to me.”

“You think that by carrying this invisible burden and pushing yourself to the point of borderline insanity you’re going to get better? That you won’t burnout? That somehow you’re going to get back at me? After you’ve ruined your knee and not only ruined your chances at swimming competitively ever again but just in general? You think you’d finally feel like you’ve served me a hot plate of revenge?”

There’s no reason for him to be able to see right through you so easily. There’s no reason for him to know how stupid this whole thing is and how really the only one suffering is you. Always you. Only you. Alone.

Jungkook’s face twists into a vision of pain and you’re stunned into silence. It’s like you can tell how much your disregard for your own body is affecting him when it shouldn’t. He’s your self-proclaimed enemy that was once your friend. You shouldn’t feel like you’re hurting him more than yourself.

You don’t even feel the lone tear that slips past your walls and slides down your cheek until he moves closer and uses a smooth thumb to wipe it away. Dammit, you’re better than this.

“Not everything is about you, Jungkook.” But right now it is. For you, it is.

He nods his head once. The pain that was painted on his face morphing into something you can’t discern but his thumb doesn’t lift from your face. Instead, the rest of his fingers cradle the side of your face like they’re protecting you. You inflate at the action. After several seconds, they’re gone.

“I should go,” he states matter-of-factly.

Don’t, you want to say but the words live and die in your throat You know if you start you’d say too much. “Yeah.”

Even though you want him to make up some silly excuse as to why he has to walk you home. Like maybe you’d slip and knock yourself into the netherworld. He does nothing of that sort. He puffs out his cheeks; resembling a bunny, and then he sends you a wary smile that doesn’t reach his eyes.

For the first time in ages, you don’t like the sight of his retreating back. For the first time in a long time, you don’t even have the energy to pledge eternal damnation to Jeon Jungkook. All you want to do is ask him why. Why were you not enough? Why did he hand you back your heart when all you wanted was for him to keep it. And why did he suddenly do a one-eighty in college, resorting to snide comments and remarks that make you boil but also instill air into your lungs like you are finally breathing again? Why does it seem like he still cares?

You’re on a mission to drown out everything that has to do with Jeon Jungkook. You don’t like that he has created a rupture in your stratosphere. You don’t like that you’re realizing that you’ve been waging a war but not against Jungkook like you’d originally perceived. Now now that you think about it, when has he really been a rival? You’ve really only been fighting yourself.

The two of you aren’t even in the same category. You don’t even specialize in the same swimming techniques. And now that you’re seriously going through it, has he ever really been conceited about getting better times? All he ever did was point out things you were doing off and even though you hated it, it wasn’t like he was lying.

You’re one step away from your dorm when your phone buzzes with a flurry of text messages. It’s from the swim team group chat for juniors and seniors.

Taehyung: It’s the weekend mi amigos *dancing emoji*

Vivian: whatever you’re thinking... it’s gonna be a no! from me! also i thought u were sick?

Taehyung: aw come on i havent even said anything yet

Taehyung: not! sick! it was just the flu

Seokjin: flu is a sickness, no?

Vivian: im so tired dudes,, im not going out with y’all to get smashed

Nathan: im down

Taehyung: yes!!!!

Taehyung: guys i promise! you’ll love me for it. a friend of a friend is hosting a party on Greek row. Let’s GO!!

Vivian: it’s not like we’re the only friends you have. ask someone else dude

Before you even think about it, you’re typing a response.

You: I’ll come. We don’t have training tmr so...

Taehyung: OMFG

Nathan: i had no idea you were in the chat lol

Vivian: rude. if y/n’s going then maybe she’ll keep Tae’s head on straight

Seokjin: don’t know if JK’s down but I’ll drag him out if I have to.

You: don’t do that.

Taehyung: why? don’t you guys have that whole foreplay thing going on or?????

You: WHAT

Vivian: wait i might come after all

Seokjin: Tae, leave it alone.

Taehyung: okay but it’s not my fault they both barely look at anyone other than themselves during practice. i can’t be the only one that noticed them basically eye-fucking each other all day everyday

Nathan: i second that

Vivian: ... sorry, y/n. but i third that

Seokjin: GUYS. if she leaves the chat because y’all can’t keep your mouth shut istg,,

Nathan: wait is jungkook reading this?

God, how you want the whole universe to open up and swallow you whole. Your phone feels like a hot potato in your hands. You throw the wretched thing into the back of your jeans pocket and blink over and over again as you rush into your dorm and up the elevator.

It takes the rest of the day to calm your cheeks from splitting from humiliation or embarrassment, it’s a close tie. You don’t pay attention in class, you can barely nap without the words blinking at the back of your eyelids like neon target signs.

Foreplay? Foreplay?!

You almost spontaneously combust.

You hear the telltale sound of a key unlocking your dorm room door and you hightail out of the ensuite bathroom before you can even think.

“Foreplay?!” You all but scream at your roommate and fellow swim team member, Vivian.

At the very least she looks sheepish, smiling nervously as she pushes a piece of her coiled hair behind her ear. “I thought you knew. I mean, everyone talks about it.”

“What about me wanting to rip his ass from his hole screams foreplay to anyone?!”

She shrugs, her lilac sweater falling down one brown shoulder. “I don’t know, it’s kinda sexy.” She drops her backpack on the only sofa and turns back to you. “He’s the only one you really talk to in the team so, everyone just kinda assumed y’all were either a has-been or a to-be couple.”

Wheezing, you lock your arms defiantly across your chest. “I don’t like him.”

“Yeah, okay.” Vivian laughs, unconvinced for some reason.

“I’m not kidding. He’s annoying. Always breathing down my neck like he’s my personal trainer or something. Any time I do a thing it’s like he has to say something in response, you know. I don’t hate him but I don’t... I don’t like like him.”

“Do you think he’s attractive?”

“Everyone does.”

She smirks at you like she’s caught you dead in a trap. “And you?”

You bite your lip. It’s not worth the hassle to lie. “A little bit. A teeny-tiny bit.”

“What about him do you think is attractive? And don’t mention his thighs because we all know those are in a different league of their own.”

That gets a laugh out of you. Vivian’s mouth widens at the sound. You realize then that maybe, just maybe, you’ve been hoarding things in for too long. And you appreciate Vivian because she’s always been nice and has tolerated your one-worded answers and four am showers like a champ. You want to give her an award or something.

You lean against the wall and think about her question. “Well, in a way his nagging and pushing my buttons can be seen as being attentive? I mean, he notices things about me that I don’t. And I’ve been… thinking that maybe he’s not really all that bad like I conjured up in my head.” More than that, before everything turned to shit, you thought he was the kindest, funniest person in the galaxy.

“Well, I’m no team Jungkook,” she snickers at her own Twilight reference and your lips tilt up as well. “And I won’t pretend to know what’s gone on between you and him. But whatever it is, maybe y’all just need to, like, talk it out.”

“I—”

Vivian shushes you. “You know I’m right.” She sashays to her room door and then turns back to you. “We’re going to go to Taehyung’s friend of a friend’s frat party and you’re gonna get the liquid courage to talk to him. I think everyone on the team would appreciate the whole sexual tension going on between the two of you finally being exiled into the cosmos.”

Cosmos?

You’re not really sure what happens after that. You let Vivian convince you to trade your comfortable sweatpants for an A-line skirt, tights and a stylish sweater that you’d bought on a whim. At least if you’re going to really say screw all and go for this party, you refuse to be a shivering mess.

Even though Greek Row is truly not that far from your dorm, you let Vivian drive the two of you over. She talks about everything and anything and it feels like it’s been forever since you hung out with anyone that wasn’t during scheduled practice and workout sessions.

Hell, what have you been doing for the last four years? Being obsessed with results that apparently your arch-nemesis doesn’t even care about?

Vivian tells you about the dude she’s dating and how he’s on the university’s volleyball team. You’re more surprised than you should be. You can’t believe you’ve been roommates with her for almost two years and you barely know anything about her other than surface-level shit. Oh, Zelda, this is one big bitch of an awakening.

“I’m sorry,” you say sincerely as she puts the car in park aways from the actual fraternity building. The entire street is blocked up with cars so it was hard to find any space. “For being here and yet not really at the same time.”

Thankfully, Vivian doesn’t make you sweat. “S’cool. Everyone’s got their own shit.”

“I’ve been really shitty lately.”

“Hmm, well, we can get drunk off our asses and feel really shitty together?” You decide then and there that she is amazing and only the devil will be able to pry this budding friendship out of your cold hands.

You find out that Vivian is very skilled at mixing drinks. It takes barely half an hour for you to start feeling a buzz and by your third round of whatever she stirs for you, you’ve straight up arrived at the land of Drunkenville: population; one. You’re busy debating with her and her boyfriend about how sports anime is simply the best branch of cinema to have ever been created and the one sub-genre that truly speaks about the resilience of the human spirit when you feel a heavy arm wrap around your shoulders.

“Y/N,” the voice all but screams in your ear. You hazily look up to see Taehyung’s chiseled face smiling down at you. And even your intoxicated self can tell that he’s pregamed the fuck out of this night already. “I brought lil Jungkookie for you. At first, he was all blah blah not going but when I said you were going to be here. Boi jumped like a fish in water.”

Taehyung laughs and you laugh with him, not really sure if you get the joke but happy nonetheless that he’s happy.

“‘Sup Viv and Viv’s boyfriend,” he salutes them and weirdly enough, Vivian’s boyfriend doesn’t take offense. He salutes back.

Vivian rolls her eyes but then she clasps two strong hands across your shoulders, effectively washing away the tipsy gaze from your eyes for a moment. “Now, listen. You’re going to find Jungkook and let him know how you really feel. Use all this liquid courage and let him have it. And you shouldn’t care that we’re at a party because almost everyone is drunk anyway.

And if that goes to shit and you want out of this place, don’t you dare even think of walking home, okay? You look for me. Don’t think I haven’t seen you limping your way across the dorm like a crazy bitch. I didn’t say anything because I didn’t have the right. But so help me, if you so much as think of walking back I will ... I don’t know what I will do but you won’t like it! So go find Jungkook and do us all a favor and end this eternal foreplay.”

Foreplay... that damned word again. It overrides your brain system and makes you think of things you shouldn’t want. But you’re stupidly confident right now. Hell, your knee hasn’t really been bothering you since you woke up from your nap. The alcohol in your blood is dancing to its own beat and it’s lighting your system on fire.

If not now then when?

You have a gazillion and one questions to ask Jungkook. Questions you’ve kept silenced and bottled down in your heart for years. Questions that keep you up at night. And maybe its because the last month and a half has made you question everything about yourself and your ethic and your predicament, you know you have to do this now.

Fuck it. Who cares if you become the source of this boorish party’s entertainment like a walking cliché? It’s not like you’d remember anything that happens here and you only know a handful of people. Embarrassment? You don’t know her. Not today.

You find him in the basement with a cup of something near his booted feet and his gleaming eyes transfixed on the TV in front of him. His tongue poking a hole in cheek. There’s a small crowd of people around him and you take one glance at the screen and see that he’s playing Super Smash. Of course. He looks beautiful like this. Different than the last time you saw him and better because he doesn’t have that look of agony coloring his eyes.

You could probably spend a whole day just looking at him. Taking in the man that’s grown from the boy you once knew and called your own. His body is a work of art and ought to be chiseled and crafted like the sculptures of the Renaissance era. If you were any good a sculptor, you would’ve done just that. Instead, you commit him to memory. Because even though it is possible that neither of you likes each other anymore, you want to remember this.

He looks perfect like this. Happy. Not distressed and sad like when you’d confessed to him. When you had laid your heart bare before him and he didn’t even react. You wish you could say he had pried your heart out of your hands and ripped it to shreds. But that wasn’t the case. Your heart hadn’t shattered by his blatant rejection. It had melted.  

You watch as his character, Link, of course, K.O’s his opponent and Player 2 Victory flashes on the television screen. He wins. Like always. You don’t feel mad like you usually do. Maybe you’ve finally accepted that there are just some things you can’t win no matter how steadfast and committed you are.

Jungkook looks up from his controller, pumping his fist in the air, his long, dark hair flopping around his face like a curtain. Your veins practically burst with electricity when his smiling eyes notice yours in the corner like you knew they would. The smile dims and you expect that. You’re not asking for a love to cure all epidemics or a lie to burn your body to ash. You just want to move on. To finally escape the purgatory you’ve put yourself in.

“We need to talk,” you try to say as loud as you can but the cheers and conversations of the people around you drown you out.

Somehow in someway, he hears you and nods his head. Maybe he’s a glutton for pain like you. He scoots out of the loveseat, standing to his full height and making pleasant excuses to his newly acquired friends that you don’t know. Maybe it’s the fake courage but you don’t take your gaze away from him. You’re going to do this. You have to — you suck in a huge breath — you must.

Once he steps into your bubble of personal space, the rest of the world fizzles out.

“This is a bundle of firsts, Ice Queen. You? At a party and instigating a conversation with me first? Damn, did you get a taste of hell without me videoing?”

“You always joke about everything,” you decide to bite the bullet. “I used to find that really cute.”

Alcohol o’ alcohol, why hath thou forsaken me? You almost look up to the heavens and question what possessed you to drink so much but then you rehear Vivian’s speech in your head and you find your resolve and strangle it.

Jungkook’s eyebrows fly up like he’s not quite prepared for this. “Wait, what are you... Are you drunk right —”

“I’m not good with words. And I’ve always sucked at speaking my mind and being thoughtful and generally being a good person. Like you,” you smile sadly when you remember the first time you ever made a friend; the boy in front of you that had offered you to come over sometime and play his GameCube with him when his older siblings were too busy to hang with him. “I’m passive at best when it comes to anything that’s not swimming. And even that, you got me into it. You were the reason I started it. You know this, I would’ve rather died than engage in anything that made me exert energy. But you made it fun until I genuinely loved it.”

“That’s not,” Jungkook shakes his head adamantly. “That’s—”

You shoot him a look. “Let me finish okay? I have this whole thing in my head and ... please, just let me say it.”

You hadn’t realized the curious looks the people around had been shooting your way until you see Jungkook scowl at any and every one before he intertwines your hands with his and pulls you out of the basement in a swift motion. You don’t mind the giddy feeling enveloping your chest at the sight of your fingers wrapped around each other. A part of you actually loves how cocooned it makes you feel. You want to bottle this feeling up and bathe in it.

He must be overfamiliar with the frat house because he leads you expertly into a room at the end of the hallway on the first floor. He shuts the door and then locks it. For a minute, he stares at your locked hands and you wonder if he feels the same pull you do. If he’s ever felt the same pull you do.

“When I handed you my heart and my everything, why didn’t you want it? Why did you act like I had committed a grievous crime against you and your glorious self?”

There. You’ve gone and said the thing. The biggest question that has plagued your mind for months and years. If your best friend didn’t even find value in you then really, was there any to begin with?

Jungkook lets out a heavy sigh that careens his shoulders down as if he’s carrying the weight of the world. A sigh so deep that it shakes his body from the vibrations visible through his black tee, and crashes into your soul. He closes his eyes for his barely a second but you wish he’d just spit it out. Pour acid on your wounds so you can feel the fire of a thousand suns and finally, fucking finally move on. Baptism by fire they call it but what you want is a goddamn exorcism.

“You thought I shat gold and that I hung the moon and that I was this perfect person when I’m not. I mean, have you listened to yourself? You think you’re a bad person because all you’ve ever done is compare me to you. But it was you and me. Not either or.

You think I really love swimming when you’re not the one egging me on? Pushing me to be better? You think I would’ve let you confess your magnificent love for me and then accept it when every sentence you said contrasted you from me. Pitted you against me? I’m competitive, you’re competitive but I didn’t think you needed competition when it came to that. You’d already won. And then I had this crazy stupid idea that maybe just being friends with you would work. I mean, love isn’t something you need to fight yourself bloody and dead for. Why would I accept this really amazing love from someone that was going to feel less than me and feel like shit for it?”

“So, what were you gonna do? Just wait till I up and decided that I was insecure and didn’t have a major inferiority complex I had no idea about?” Your sober thoughts vomit out of your mouth with impressive speed.

“I was still your friend,” Jungkook almost yells and out of his aggravation, his hands slip out of yours. The loss is staggering. He jabs his index finger into his chest. “I did everything I could do to still be your friend. But you wouldn’t talk to me. And I get that we were sixteen and there were so many ways we could’ve done better but you shut me out.”

“No, I…” You begin to say but the words die in your mouth.

Truth be told, you did shut him out. It wasn’t like you blocked him on every site. But when he tried to talk to you at school, you pretended he wasn’t there. When he stopped over at your place, you told your parents that you were sick and to keep him out. When he sent party invites on the gaming platforms the two of you shared a love for, you ignored them and turned off your console. But it wasn’t like you did all of this out of spite to begin with. It was just easier.

You were hurt. Seeing him brought on multiple feelings of shame, embarrassment, and pain all wrapped snugly like a demonic burrito. And he was your best friend, it wasn’t like you didn’t have other friends you could’ve asked for advice but the one person you wanted to talk to was the one person you couldn’t reach out to. So you didn’t think about it. Instead, you threw yourself headfirst into freezing ass water and worked your butt off with the one thing you had left.

And contrary to what Jungkook believes, he made you feel good about yourself. Like an anchor. You didn’t have to hide your nerdiness between a cold exterior so as to not get teased about it. With him, you were free. Like he was a sun that burned a path that enabled you to breathe easy. To be yourself so that you wouldn’t drown.

“You think I really go around joking with every bum on the swim team about Down To Fuck Demons for hire or that I walk every person with a rubbish knee home in fucking negative degree weather? Or that I worry about everyone that’s throwing their whole future away over a rivalry that doesn’t even exist? You think I’ve been playing the role of a pest around you because I hate you? —”

“Vehemently despise,” you choke on your words but your sense of seriousness causes Jungkook to burst into a staccato of quick muted laughter.

“Y/N,” he whispers your name like it’s a thing of beauty. And maybe it is. Right now you think so. “Firstly, I was dumb and I thought if I left things as they were maybe you’d realize how fucking awesome you were without me. But then all you ever did was practice and practice like you were training for an aquatics mafia or some shit. And then I realized that maybe you’re not the only one that sucks with words and when to say them. I should’ve told you that I did love you. Platonically. Romantically. And you made me feel great and not because you were less than but rather because being with you meant that I was my best self.”

You feel a cascade of water flooding down your cheeks like a waterfall but you don’t release a sound and you don’t really care about it because this moment feels sacred. Because you’re not crying out of pain or agony or longing. Rather it’s because you finally understand.

“You were like the sun and you were so blinding that I thought I would incinerate if I was still next to you like nothing happened.”

“Ha,” Jungkook scoffs, using a palm to run across his face. Then he squints his eyes at you like he’s seeing you anew for the first time. “If I’m the sun then you are —”

“The sun eater.” The words fly out of your mouth with ease. Quoting your fave anime characters was a thing the two of you had done relentlessly for days, heck, years.

Jungkook nods his head, elated that you remember like there was ever a time you’d forget My Hero Academia. “I’m not gonna apologize for not accepting your confession back then. I can’t. Not when I genuinely think neither of us knew what the fuck we were doing back then. Still don’t.”

“And I’m not going to say sorry for pulling away from you. I mean, I’m not a masochist.”

He lets out a throaty laugh that washes your insides clean. And you give a watery smile back, feeling soberer than you did a couple hours ago. You bet you look worse for wear but you don’t care because you’re done not pretending.

“Why did it take four years for me to...” your voice chokes and you almost break down right then and there. But your stubbornness is a thing of pride. “For us to finally talk about it. It would’ve made so much more sense if we had just talked and now I feel like I’ve wasted four years of my life being angry? Feeling discarded? But it’s not like that at all.”

Jungkook’s smooth yet experienced hands cradle the sides of your face and the overflowing tears pool in the flesh that connects his thumbs to your skin. “Friends fight all the time.”

You snort and he grins. “Most friends aren’t half as dumb as us.”

“You got that right. I think dumbness is attractive.” He says with an overflowing aura of achievement. “This just means we’ll just have to spend more time making up for it.” He dips his head down till his lips brush the tip of your ear. “And by the way, I think I’m done being your friend exclusively,” he says.

“Yeah?” You ask and for an inane reason, you smile even harder because the tears on your face feel like rain. And you’re still breathing easier, albeit a tad bit faster. But there’s no crash and burn after you’ve soared too close to the sun. Unlike before your heart feels like it’s glowing instead of charring.

“I think I want to take you out on a date.”

Your eyes widen with faux-horror. “Just one?”

“Oh my Zelda, can I at least finish my grand speech?” He rolls his eyes. “As I was saying, it won’t be one date but you know that kinda depends on if you’re still god at Fortnite. I mean, partying up is basically the same as marriage, you know?”

“Kook?”

“Yeah?”

“Your inner nerd is showing.”

Jungkook sputters loudly, the action making his hair swish across his forehead and his hands drop from your face. “Oh, forgive me. I thought you loved my nerdiness.”

“Love,” you correct him. “Present tense.”

His mouth practically breaks even with the floor with how wide he’s gaping. You haven’t sprouted a second head, have you?

You clear your throat, attempting to be blasé about the whole thing. “Well, if we’re really going to pursue this whole dating thing then I have to be honest, right? I think it’s quite sexy how knowledgeable you are about gaming and stuff even though we’re like hardcore athletes.”

“So I’m like an onion? Three dimensional? The more you get to know me, the more you love how I’m not like Other Guys trademark sign?”

You guffaw so hard you almost start crying all over again. “Oh my Zelda, we were having a moment. Why did you ruin our moment?”

“Think I can make up for it.” He looks at you with something akin to competition and licks his lips.

Your eyes falter at the action, zeroing in on them. Suddenly the distance between yours and his feels like a crime against humanity. It’s comical really, how the temperature of your body can fly from ice cold to a blazing inferno in less than minutes.

“Fuck,” you whisper.

“As you wish.”

Jungkook bends his lips to connect with yours in a swift motion. You’re surprised but a part of you must have anticipated it because you are pushing deeper into him as quickly as humanly possible. His arms snake across your waist, his hands landing squarely on your ass and his groan eliciting a magnitude of butterflies in the pit of your stomach as his tongue danced an infinite tango with yours. Smoothly, he backs you up until you feel your head tap a wall for support.

Holy crap shit. Your mind is a mess. No wait, your mouth is a mess. A warped sense of dizziness floods through your body and it has nothing to do with the alcohol you consumed earlier and everything to do with the sensuous teeth nipping at your bottom lip while his hands deftly squeeze your ass. Fuck, you can’t breathe. You don’t want to breathe. You cling unto his shoulders for stability and revel at how corded they feel under your touch.

He tears his lips away from yours, breathless, resting his forehead against yours. “God, you’re gonna be the death of me.”

“You can’t die until we get to the part where we role-play as demon and a naive spell caster.” You’re out of breath as well because that kiss was something else. Divine, maybe.

“I get to be the demon though, right?”

You grin at that. “Of course. I’m not a heathen.”

This time you kissed him, pushing all thoughts of future escapades further away from your mind and focusing on the beautiful man in front of you. Reaching up, you dig your hands through Jungkook’s abundant hair and moan. You understand then what it must have been like for Icarus to fly off to the sun. It must have scorched his skin to death within seconds, and yet at the same time, it must have been oh so slow. And you doubt he despaired because in the end he was heading home and he was finally not alone. You understand so well because the more the fire in your veins expands, the more you come close to burning up entirely. And you love it. You’re losing all control and you don’t care because he’s losing his alongside you.

Everything turns into a mess of frenzied motions. Him reluctantly removing a hand from your ass to reach up and use his fingers to clasp around your throat and position it just right enough for him to latch his lips there and suck. hard. When he pulls away from you to admire his handiwork, the lopsided grin on his face almost sends you into another need to kiss him.

“I’m not gonna fuck you at a frat party when only Zelda knows how many losers have cummed on a singular bedsheet,” he announces without remorse.

“Fair enough.”

“But I am going to do very wicked things to you that’ll loosen up those shoulders to the point of being supple. And after that, you’re gonna promise me that we’ll go get your knee checked out later.”

A few hours you would’ve kicked and screamed at the idea of anything derailing your plan of getting on the lineup for the competition. You thought that admitting you need help meant that you were quitting. Punishing yourself for something so irrevocably at out of your control. Now though, you nod your head drowsily. You hate the doctors but you hate self-destructing even more. Especially now when you have someone that hurts when you hurt.

He’s unraveling you.

“I’ll go.”

His eyebrows shoot up to his hairline, not believing how easily you’ve conceded to him. “Where has my sweet, stubborn Ice Queen gone? Bring her back to me, please. All this ecstasy must have gone to her head.”

God, whoever said you still won’t want to deck Jungkook even after experiencing something so explosive. But his grin threatens to split your heart two. Like he’s happy to just be with you, adoring you, joking with you. Oh, how your body is singing with praises.

“Yours?” You cock an eyebrow at him.

Jungkook beams. He’s the sun and you’re the moon. Now that you’ve tasted this, you’re never going to let go. You are simply submerged.

“Haven’t you realized? You’re my girl.”

a/n: i know very much that i took a lot of liberty when writing about collegiate swimming/sports in generral (i took an advanced swim class at my uni last semester so thats where all my info comes from) i tweaked it a lil bit to fit my purposes but it was fun to try to write about it hehe. 

i hope you all loved this fic as much as i loved writing it!!!! 

⇢ masterlist

©️ 2020 kai, high-on-food. ✉

[joy1579]

RFA discovers MC is secretly a neko girl (mc hides that she has cat ears and a tail as well as some catlike tendencies)

so these things just keep getting longer and maybe I should change them to like legit-ly written scenarios but I’m lazy and this one was already formatted this way so, yeah sorry guys. 

oh also I have a master list now. I try to update it every time I post something! Master list

Jumin

Elated. F***ing loves you. You give him opinions on all the cat related businesses.

-        The first time he saw you he knew you were the one for him

-        You were dressed so nicely in an ankle length skirt and sun hat

-        Elizabeth the 3rd was curious about you from the start

-        He had never seen her so interested in a stranger before

-        As you stayed with him though he noticed some strange things

-        He never saw you without some sort of head covering even though you didn’t seem to enjoy wearing them

-        You also knew what Elizabeth the 3rd needed before she even mewed. As though you could tell what she wanted from the smallest flick of her tail

-        One day he came home to you curled up on the floor near the window and part of him panicked

-        He rushed to check on you but stopped short the second he saw you hat half off

-        A tan cat ear twitched slightly in some unknown dream as your chest your rose slowly with your breath

-        He cursed his ever so slightly shaking hand as he reached to stroke behind that cute ear

-        He would never admit to the flutter in his heart as you mewled softly at his touch before stretching lazily

-        You yawned and looked around as you woke slowly

-        The second you saw him though you jumped back

-        He saw you relax a bit once your eye’s met his

-        But he motioned to the top of his head, a smirking just a bit and you lifted your hand to mirror his movment

-        That’s when you felt your ears free and exposed. You start to panic all over again and in a second his arms are around you

-        “MC it’s okay calm down” he says lowly

-        “no no its, it’s not, Jumin you can’t say anything okay! Not to anyone! I don’t know what will happen if this gets out but, it won’t be good. you know that right? This is a secret.” You said shaking in his arms

-        he squeezes you tighter and you feel his lips against the top of your head

-        “your secret is safe with me. You are safe with me.” He whispers into your hair as though those words were all that mattered in the world.

-        For you, they were.

-        The next moment you were hugging him back and purring thankfully as you nuzzled into his chest “Thank you Jumin”

-��       The next time he came home you wore shorts and went hatless. You looked so much more comfortable since your ears and tail could move freely

-        All his hugs include ear scratches that make you purr and close your eyes happily

-        You squeeze your way into his lap when you want attention and he doesn’t think he’s ever been happier.

Yoosung

shook. Legit worried because do you need a vet or a doctor. Doubles down on his studies just in case.

-        You tell him after the RFA party You knew, KNEW he was the one so you had to tell him.

-        As the rest of the RFA is cleaning up you offer to drive Yoosung back to the hospital

-        At a stoplight on the way you tell him and show him your ears

-        He passes out. You panic and floor it to the hospital

-        They assure you he’s fine but you stay until he wakes up

-        “MC I had the weirdest dream.” He tells you. You try not to laugh as he talks about how you had the cutest cat ears he had ever seen.

-        You lift your hat up just enough for him to get a peak of one of your ears and wink at him

-        His heart rate jumps and you start to think maybe you shouldn’t be teasing him when he’s in such fragile condition

-        But the way he splutters and turns red is way too cute so you lean down to kiss his lips

-        “this, this isn’t real.” He says “this is too good to be real” you laugh and assure him you’ll be here until he wakes up again.

-        He holds your hand as the pain meds pull him into sleep while he mutters about what a funny dream this was.

-        The next week is comprised of you teasing him with sneak glances of your ears or tail only when he’s sleep addled or just a little buzzed on pain meds

-        You have to admit the constant praise of how cute, soft, and pretty your ears and tail are is, nice. Since most people never saw them it was nice to hear what he thought of them.

-        Even if he was still convinced it was just his imagination

-        Then he was sent home and you decided to REALLY tell him what was going on

-        “is this cuz of all my dreams MC? I didn’t think you’d take it this far!” you sigh and take his hand to feel your ear twitch

-        You have never seen him so red he’s gone beyond his normal panicked spluttering and into silence

-        You’re actually starting to worry now because he’s been standing there silently doing his best impression of a goldfish for a while now

-        “Yoosung?” you ask tail flicking anxiously

-        “it’s real?” he manages as his fingers begin to slowly scratch at your ear

-        You’re a little distracted by his scratching but you try to explain anyway

-        “you can’t, um you can’t tell anyone though okay Yoosung.”

-        “huh why” he asked looking at your ears in awe bringing another hand up absently to pet your hair

-        But the petting was getting really distracting now and you had to stop the urge to purr though you couldn’t help your instinct to nuzzle your head into his hands

-        “I don’t” you really were trying to focus here but people didn’t scratch your ears often since they were always hidden “people won’t” you lost your train of thought again as his fingers curled under your ear to stoke through your hair again

-        You jerked away immediately glaring at him ready to scold him for distracting you

-        But when you met his eyes you could practically see stars in his eye’s

-        “MC did you just purr? Because I was petting you?” he asked looking happier than you’d ever seen anyone look in your life

-        You shake your head before chuckling at him “you’re lucky I love you”

Saeyoung

so many questions. Tests what cat traits you have. Cat puns. Understands your secrecy.

-        You had no medical history. That was weird.

-        Home birth, home school, home job. home EVERYTHING.

-        Your record was sparse to say the least. So he checked you out on the apartment CCTV

-        Even your clothes seemed to hide you away. So of course he was curious

-        He dug deeper, found your social media and while he enjoyed learning about your interest’s and he certainly enjoyed the memes you posted it didn’t give him anymore solid info to go off of.

-        So he kept checking the CCTV to learn more and then he saw you in your pajamas he was embarrassed and started to look away. He may be a hacker but even he had limits. But then he saw them

-        Cat ears and a tail how cute he didn’t know you liked cosplay you hadn’t mentioned it on social media

-        But how did you make them move like that. he had to know so next time you two met in the chat he asked

-        He’s confused and watching you scramble on the CCTV to cover your ears and tail

-        you exited the chat right away and called seven

-        “seven you can’t tell anyone. I swear this is really bad! You shouldn’t know about this. What the hell were you thinking spying on me like that.”

-        He sobers up hearing your panic and anger

-        After a moment of calming you down and promising he’ll straighten things out on the messenger he hangs up

-        Then things happened and he was there. answered the door and locked eyes with him

-        He hadn’t meant to ask but before he could stop himself the words had tumbled out of his mouth

-        “Can I see your ears” and his face was red because he was supposed to have better self-control he knew this was a sensitive topic for you

-        But you nodded and once the door was shut you slipped you hat from you head

-        Saeyoung’s hand was immediately reaching out but he stopped short at the sight of your clenched shut eyes as though you were ready to be hit.

-        He could recognize that face anywhere, braced and ready to take whatever blow was coming

-        “sorry I should have asked may I touch them”

-        You nodded sharply still tense but he saw you unclench your jaw and flex your finger out of there tight fist

-        His fingers gently skimmed across you left ear and moved behind it to scratch there the way he knew cats enjoyed and you purred before you could stop yourself

-        Your hands shot up to cover your mouth and your face burned

-        Saeyoungs eyes where wide and you could see his blush clear as day

-        Then his arms where around you and you were pulled tight against his chest

-        After that he made it his mission to see just how catlike you were

-        He tried lasers, no effect unless you were really drunk Cat nip, you liked the scent but no more than anyone else might like the smell of flowers. He was too afraid to test the whole cats land on their feet thing but just judging by you balance he assumed you could probably do that.

-        When you felt down he called you kitty cutie and pet your head. He loved you.

Zen

wants to make it work. Lays off dissing Elizabeth. Really doesn’t want to tell Jumin why though.

-        You tried not to fall for him, tried to push him away

-        He was allergic to cats, he was allergic to you

-        The first time you went to meet him you took precautions

-        You showered twice as long, brushed your hair ears and tail extra so you wouldn’t lose a single strand

-        You tied your hair in a tight band and hid it in your hat with your ears you even tucked you tail away in the shorts you wore under your long skirt

-        But he was still sneezing like crazy

-        You felt awful, and you were sure this relationship would never work.

-        So you told him

-        You tried not to cry, you didn’t want to make it harder on him, and you tended to sound like a mewling kitten

-        Then you saw the hurt in his eyes and he wanted a reason and he was holding your hand and you could hear the hurt in his voice

-        And you were crying. The second you started you knew the jig was up his eyes where wide now and he was pulling your free hand away from your face

-        “MC how did you make that sound?”

-        You shook your head and removed you hat to show him

-        “are those? Are those real?” your ears folded downwards mournfully in response giving him his answer even as you nodded “and this is why we can’t see each other?”

-        “I tried to make it easier! I brushed my ears and, and” you took a shuddering halting breath “I tried so hard”

-        He took a deep breath and pulled you into his arms “we can figure something out”

-        “I can’t do that to you your miserable look even your face is swelling!” you cried

-        The next time you saw him at the RFA party you kept him at an arm’s length. You had taken all the precautions but you knew it wasn’t enough so you kept your distance

-        Every time Zen approached you, you made an excuse to dart away

-        Until he cornered you

-        “don’t avoid me” he said sternly “if you don’t want to see me that fine but don’t avoid me because you think you’re not worth me sneezing”

-        You were blinking back tears you would not cry again you told yourself

-        “I don’t want to hurt you”

-        “I’ll buy medicine, we’ll get air-filters, there’s even shots I could get. I love you. Allergies can’t change that”

-        Slowly you two found what worked. He saw an allergy specialist once a month, you had filters in every room, you showered twice a day and brushed yourself morning and night.

-        He even signed up for an experimental new treatment that was doing winders for him

-        The first time you nuzzled your head into his neck and purred his name he knew he made the right decision

-        No amount of pain in the world would make him give up that moment

-        He still claimed not to be a cat person saying you were the only exception

-        And you had to admit you were okay with that

Jaehee

confused but calm. Asks you how you keep fur off your clothes. Learns, slowly to be okay with the stray hair here and there.

-        You tell her the day before the café opens

-        She’s pretty sure this is a prank by seven but then you show her your ears (it’s easier than trying to free your tail from your long skirt without flashing her)

-        She was quiet, then she stood and began to walk away. You honestly started to panic.

-        She did hate watching Elizabeth after all you had thought it was only because of the extra work and cleaning

-        But maybe she had some other reason for hating cats

-        “Jaehee?” you called shakily “I, I’m sorry. I should have told you sooner but I thought, well I thought it wouldn’t be this big a deal. I know you like things neat and tidy and sometimes fur messes that up but I promise I can clean up after myself. I know all the secrets and I’ll take responsibility for the extra cleaning. I, I really like you.”

-        By this you were fighting desperately not to cry

-        Then she turned around with two cups of coffees

-        “MC I’m not mad. I just need some time to figure this out” she said strolling over to set one of the cups in front of you

-        “I suppose we won’t need hairnets for your ears since you keep them in your hat.”

-        You smiled at her. You knew this was her way of accepting you.

-        She took a sip of her coffee and you couldn’t help yourself. You reached across the small table and took her free hand in yours

-        “well to be honest I’ve given it some thought and maybe I could learn to make latte art? they could be catpuccino’s” you joked and to your delight she chuckled

-        “You’ve spent too much time with seven, but that is a good idea”

-        As time goes by she becomes more and more comfortable with your cat characteristic.

-        You won’t admit she finds your cat naps in the sun to be cute, but she’s got a folder on her phone dedicated to pictures of them

-        She admires how carful you are with Zens allergies and is thankful you’re so understanding.

-        You hum while you make the cat latte art and she thinks it’s cute that you sound like a cat when you do (she thinks it also might boost sales but that’s just a guess)

-        She secretly revels in the fact that as much as Jumin loves cats you chose her and sided with her in the messenger

-        She asks if you can talk to cats. You think it’s because she has a few choice words to share with Elizabeth the 3rd

-        You explain that while you can understand cats more than most people it’s not like talking to people it’s more like reading body language and tone

-        She shakes her head and mumbles “yeah that makes sense, it’s just a cat after all”

-        You give Elizabeth a bit of the cold shoulder anyway

-        As you two grow closer she starts to absently pet you while you watch Zen DVD’s

-        When you start to purr she’s so surprised she misses her favorite scene

-        She’s so flustered as she rewinds you can’t help but giggle and kiss her on the cheek

-        Which absolutely does not help her calm down at all

[jelloopy]

Murder on The Rockport Limited Notes

Previous: Character Creation, HtbG, Moonlighting

Ch 1

Robbie is a halfling who is pretty shitty but he’s good at making “potions” (Robbie is the roommate that everyone really hates but doesn’t want him to leave because he is their plug)

Taako is on the top bunk, Magnus is under Taako, Robbie is next to Taako and Merle is under Robbie

They are woken up at 3 am to report to Lucretia (3 am really?)

”Yeah it’s like Mario Mario or Luigi Mario” ~Griffin (This is so funny because this actually proves that Taako’s last name really is Taaco. Before Justin played it as a joke but this kinda derails that)

Robbie asks them for Pringles when they leave (Thus the beginning of me and the boys not remembering him by anything other than Pringles)

They arrive in their PJs (Taako is in footie pajamas and Merle’s has a flap in at the butt with a Kenny Chesney tattoo on his ass) (When the hell did Merle get that tattoo. Also, why is Lucretia in her full BoB garb right now? Was she asleep and get changed really quickly? Do her robes double as PJ’s? Did she just not go to sleep?)

Taako says he gets night terrors that’s why he’s in like a full-body Onesie/sleeping bag (That is so fricking sad if you think about his backstory later on…)

Magnus just starts changing clothing right then and there when Lucretia tells them that they don’t have time to get ready (This man really has no shame or boundaries. I imagine it was the same in the century tbh)

Leimann Kessler (half-elf man) was murdered before he was even on the train but was able to secure the Relic on the train (Personally, don’t know a lot about how trains work but this to me is kinda odd. Who knew he died? Do their bracers know when the wearer perishes? Is there like a body temp check and a pulse check in there too? We know that it can track them but… how much more can it do…)

All the relics come from a different school of magic. They were never in the hands of someone long enough to learn what they are capable of (Potentially this is a lie. We would have already known the names, schools of magic, and possibly what they could do based upon that alone. I bet Lucretia is hiding that info in her office)

The Gauntlet deals with Evocation magic (Hmmm, I can only imagine why. Maybe because Lup also worked in Evocation magic?)

Avi is manning the cannon! The whole scene with Magnus High as hell. Avi Never learned how to Wink (Avi you’re adorable I love you. Magnus. Get your shit together man.)

Taako pulls the lever too early and they change trajectory into a swamp

Leech fight! (I honest to god forgot this even happened before listening to it again. Not my fave fight)

Ch 2

Merle gets a lot of blood sucked from him by the leeches

Merle is completely submerged in the swamp and Magnus pulls his ass out (Why is it always Merle)

”Scientists have yet to agree” ~Griffin (I personally use this phrase all the time. It just makes me laugh so hard every time.)

Taako can levitate (I really wished he used this more ngl. I would also like to see some more fanart of this)

They are in Rockport! Covered in swamp shit!

Tom Beaudette! We see his house and they get hosed off then they see him at the ticket station again. (What a nice guy!)

Leimann, Diddly, and Justin Kessler (10/10 best alias’ ever)

Taako Charms Tom (It’s a nice go-to huh?)

Merle really wants to murder tom he wanted him to step in front on the train (Merle really is the one who goes straight for murder)

Ch 3

Hudson, Jess the Beheader, Graham Juicy Wizard, ANGUSSSSSSSS, and Jenkins McShittywizard (My favorite train gang!)

Travis making fun of Griffin for how he needs to sleep with 100000000 pillows (I cherish all of these out of character bits where they really just dog on one another)

Angus, my sweet summer child don’t talk to strangers. We know your grandfather’s name was long forgotten even though you’re going to visit him in Never Winter.

The boys legit think Angus is evil and Griffin yells at them bc they are being racist. (1- how are they being legit racist? You haven’t introduced anything about Angus’ race at all?) (2- Jesus he is only 10 years old my dudes)

Graham is 36 years young and is crazy obsessed with trains and his real name is Percy? He is shadowing Jenkins in hopes of learning more about working on a train

Taako from TV! (And so his legend begins!)

Ch 4

Jenkins is harnessing a limited version of teleportation magic

Angus calling the boys out on their bullshit

Taako calling Angus “pumpkin” (Literally melts my heart. I wish someone called me cute nicknames. Also, Taako hasn’t even talked to this kid that much and that name is reoccurring)

Angus has a nondescript blue book that is able to intercept messages sent through magical means (Where did this child get this book and who let him keep it? This is legit just like letting children under 13 have access to the unrestricted internet. It’s literal Hell)

The bit with Angus and “PRYING EYES AND EARS!” (uh foreshadowing my guy)

They find “Jenkins” Dead body after hearing Graham scream

Merle is able to identify a lot of things by looking at the body (It still scares me that he is technically a Physician.)

Angus pulls a small CROSSBOW OUT OF HIS SLEEVE? (Where did he get this, how did he keep it from Hudson, Why the fuck does he have it)

Angus really said “you guys run I’ll get rid of him!” and grabs Graham and runs (How strong is this child. He’s legit lifting and pulling a grown-ass man without help)

”I’m following Angus I’ll see yall in hell!” ~Taako (Yes follow the badass 10-year old please)

”I wanna tell you about the time about this time there were three ogres…”~Taako

The Foley work bit and then Griffin just snapping “The train derails and you all die” (Another out of character goof that I cherish)

”I shit and take 14 damage” ~Griffin (are you okay? How much health do you have? What’s your max HP dude?)

Taako makes the Crab monster Levitate

Magnus punched the crab monster out of the window and it got scrapped up on the side of the train

Ch 5

They follow the Crab into their sleeper car and Magnus attacks with a chair and Griffin says “I imagine because you are so skilled at carpentry that you’ve had to attack someone with a chair before so you are in fact proficient in this attack”

Jess comes in and finishes the crab off with her Soul bound ax that she can conjure at any time (This legit just means that Jenkins did not need to carry her ax to the crypt safe. She let him do it for shits n giggles. We stan)

Jess got her last name legally changed to “Beheader” and Magnus says that he got his legally changed to “The Hammer” (Really Magnus… this isnt 3rd grade stop trying to impress her. It’s that or it could be another sad reference to “Hammer and Tongs” which would mean Julia was “Tongs” D: that is so depressing and cute)

Magnus and Merle are making good progress in solving the murder

”Alright lads” “oh fuck” When Merle keeps up his disguise as Leimann Kessler (It’s so funny because his fake Leimann Kessler is just his current Argonaut Keen.)

”I cast ZONE OF TRUTH” “Jesus you’re like a zone of truth cleric” (Oh honey. This is just the beginning)

Magnus wakes Graham up with a 5% smack with his left hand and then a 6.5% smack also with his left hand (Wtf is this BNHA? Alright Deku)

Taako is an Alcoholic? (He keeps asking for a drink ...This is a bit concerning but it makes sense)

Magnus slaps Graham again with 7.2% and he popped something in Graham’s jaw and he begins screaming but Merle heals him (OKAY DEKU COOL IT MY GUY)

”I wanna be a guy... with a head!” ~” Hudson” (hehe foreshadowing)

SCUTTLE BUDDY!!!!! (A short but adorable life you have my Lil man)

Ch 6

The “fisticuffs” scene with Taako and Angus (Now this is really concerning considering his backstory. I know it’s a joke because of how many people they accidentally kill all the time but like dude… little do you know…)

Angus leading them through the mystery is so cute. But also you know its Griffin trying to get his family to really think it through and I love it. (It really makes my heart really full to hear Griffin get really excited when they figure it out slowly instead of mocking them when they guess wrong)

MERLE YES! MAGNUS YES! YOU’RE GETTING IT! YOU’RE SO CLOSE! (Teamwork makes the dream work baby!)

Magnus jumps out of the train and Griffin gets really serious and gives him the “if you fail this you will actually die” speech (This coupled with the fight scene that Magnus accidentally skipped and the fact that originally Travis did want Magnus to die so he could re-roll a rogue is so wild)

Magnus is gonna become a wrecking ball Jesus (very Magnus-core)

Hell yeah, Magnus! Knock the meat monster into Jenkins!!

Magnus gets hit for 10 points at 1hp and paries it for 10 points! (Top ten anime near-death experiences)

Jenkins threatens to kill the meat monster. Horribly misses then is thrown off the fucking train by the meat monster (Get fucked wrecked Jenkins that’s what you get for being cocky!)

Ch 7

They find the dousing rod compass that Jenkins was using and find the monocle (Pirates of the Caribbean much?)

Taako grabs The Oculus because he has escaped the thrall of a relic before

It tells him that it can make anything he can imagine (This is really interesting tbh)

The Umbrastaff eATS JENKINS WAND!!! and a Lil sigil appears on the handle of the staff that also looks like an umbrella (Lup gets fed lmao. Don’t really understand the Sigil appearing tho. It doesn’t come up any other time I don’t think so it’s cool)

Taako grabs the teleport wand thing and asks everyone to leave and he grabs a bunch of shit from the Cryptsafe pile (Very Taako-core)

They make it to the engineer’s room and Graham tries to slow the train down but he can’t

Taako wanted to open the gate to Never Winter to Phandalin but they change it to Jenkins’ garden because it needs to be a room with “one entrance” (Solid idea on Taako’s part. If it were to work no one would have been hurt)

Taako pushed Angus off the train and he looses two teeth (This man pushed a whole child off the train… ‘Ight)

Magnus dies by jumping off the train (Top ten anime death scenes)

Taako successfully opens the gate into Jenkin’s garden and the train crashes into the garden

Magnus is stabilized by Merle (Awe so the Cleric can do his job!)

Angus gives them pringles for Robbie and the compass. Taako gives Angus one of the forks from his grandfather’s set.

They go to a nearby Never Winter Clinic to get patched up

Out of character, they choose to work on voices and Griffin calls them out bc he’s been doing 8 “different” voices and Clint goes “Yeah try doing that for 40 years” get fuckin rOASTED Ditto! (Also Griffin I love you but like 3 of the voices were the exact same and 2 were so similar it wasn’t funny. Don’t get me wrong different voices aren’t my strong suit either but ya did give it your best shot so.)

We goin’ back to the moon baby!

AVI MY MAIN MAN! (I will forever and always want and need more Avi screen time)

The oculus works with illusory magic (Which is very interesting bc I know it was made by Davenport because he also worked in allusory magic but I don’t ever remember him using any magic… who knows maybe he has and I just never realized)

Lucretia thought they were gonna get it off the train before it left... woman… (You’ve known these men for how long and you thought they were gonna w h a t?)

Next: Lunar Interlude I, 

[vagrantblvrd]

Can I get some Freewood love with the not!fic prompts?

Friend, omg, yes!

I was thinking about various ideas for these two and was blanking on something that didn’t fizzle out after the first bit?

But I woke up to snow this morning (we usually don’t see a lot of it where I live) and I was like !!!

Because, look, okay. Those snowed in fic tropes that often go hand in hand with a ~remote cabin?

But also I’ve been thinking a lot about bounty hunter-y AUs lately. (I blame all the cheesy movies/tv shows I grew up on).

SO.

FAHC-ish AU where Ryan starts out as this bounty hunter-ish guy. Works with Michael after there was a Situation that amounts to your typical buddy cop kind of deal?

(Loose cannon/idiot Ryan who ended up in the business after some shenanigans that’s part of his Tragic Backstory and somewhat less of a loose cannon Michael who was just tracking down this asshole who owed him money and got dragged into the whole thing and realized he wasn’t bad at it/kind of liked the work? And then like. They started a business together because that’s what happened in a lot of those terribad movies/tv shows I watched I guess?)

ANYWAY.

Bounty hunter Ryan who’s gaining a reputation for being a creepy bastard – that sense of humor of his and jokes that don’t land right with certain audiences. Also, doesn’t talk a lot on jobs because as Michael’s pointed out flubbing his words makes him look like a dumbass? (More of one, anyway.)

So he channels the Cool Guys from terribad 80s movies and such when he’s working, and there was that time the masks came into play because Bigger Baddies and it was a panic!moment and there was a mask kiosk right there, it’s not like he fucking planned it, Michael. (Being the nerd he is, though, he immediately gravitated towards the skull mask and now it’s part of his aesthetic. Because reasons.)

Michael’s back in Los Santos dealing with paperwork and recovering from their last job – took a nasty spill off a low roof and sprained his ankle/fractured something/whatever works as a legit Plot Reason for him not going with Ryan on this latest job.

Hacker who got into stuff he shouldn’t have – businessman or politician or other Upstanding Citizen who has all these Rumors floating around them that went to Ryan and Michael about their problem.

Offering them a shit-ton of money to bring this hacker in, no questions asked and all. Best not to, really, because the little weasel is just full of lies and would say anything to save their skin. Honestly, just trust the businessman/politician explicitly and ignore the hacker’s lies and it’ll all be fine.

(Yeah, not sketchy at all, but the guy’s got some muscle-bound goons with him and they’re definitely the kind who’d have no problems killing a couple of nobodies like Ryan and Michael and what pleasure it will be to do business with them, yes indeedy)

Anyway.

Of course this asshole hacker is Gavin and of course he went digging into stuff he shouldn’t have and oh, God, he should have taken Dan up on the offer to visit him earlier.

Now he’s being chased all over the place by this lunatic in the leather jacket and nothing he does seems to slow him down for long.

Traps and lies and doubling back and hiding and whatever else that ends up with them up in the mountains somehow? Gavin running to this little town – supposed to be able to find a small airport nearby and a plane he could ~borrow to put some space between himself and all these bastards in Los Santos only to find out it was all in vain.

The plane he was told about rusting away, bullet holes all along the fuselage and ripping through one wing and he doesn’t know what happened here, but it can’t have been pleasant.

And then Ryan showing up, all Scary Spooky with his stupid everything (no mask because it really was a one time thing, why won’t you drop it, Michael?) and the piece of junk car Gavin stole to get out there and this ridiculous ~chase up a winding mountain road.

Up high enough for there to be snow, a light dusting of it on the ground and too focused on not dying to notice the storm about to hit, and anyway, anyway.

The car dies halfway up the mountain and Gavin makes a go of it on foot for a bit. Remembers seeing a cabin or such on a map he looked at way earlier, or maybe a gas station attendant mentioned it at some point, whichever.

He gets a fair distance away, Ryan bitching as he gives chase and at the start of this whole merry chase Gavin was !!! but as things went on and Ryan stumbled/fumbled along behind him grumbling and complaining and such he’s more ??? because who the hell is this guy?

Not like the other people this businessman/politician sent after him – those were more likely to just kill him and bring his body in, real unpleasant bastards, but this guy?

Gavin doesn’t even know.

They’ve had those intense face-to-face confrontations that could have gone Badly a time or two, always interrupted by some unsuspecting passerby or stray jumping out of hiding to startle them enough for Gavin to slip away.

Just enough for Gavin to wonder if maybe this one won’t put a bullet in him so he can’t run – one of the others tried that and thank God Gavin stopped by an Ammu-nation before hand to grab some body armor under his clothes or he’d be very, very dead, wouldn’t he?

Make him curious, because for all the inconveniences and such Gavin tosses his way, all the angry yelling and bitching and complaining Gavin catches wind of? He hasn’t decided to hell with it and shot Gavin when he had the chance. (Or worse, because wow there are all these ways he could have killed Gavin by now.)

Anyhow, Gavin’s still running, yes, but he’s not flat-out terrified the way he was at the start. All the traps and whatever else he threw at Ryan intending to slow him down, but no real concern about any injuries that might be inflicted in the process.

Now Gavin finds himself dismissing things that might do serious damage to Ryan even if means Gavin could actually escape. (Stupid, stupid, stupid, because no way to know if he’s right about Ryan or if he’s just looking to collect on a bigger payday for bringing Gavin in alive, but yes.)

And then!

In their run through the woods or whatever is taking place, Gavin has to cross this rickety bridge over a river and is terrified the whole time it’ll give way under his weight, but by some miracle it doesn’t. He gets across just fine, and is almost out of sight when Ryan comes charging across, and of course that’s when the damn thing gives up the ghost.

Gavin pulled up short by Ryan’s startled yelp, turning around just in time to see him swept away by the current and almost, almost taking the opportunity to get the hell away.

But, no.

Because of course he damns himself for being an idiot, a fool, and runs along the river bank after Ryan. Keeps track of him as he pelts along until there’s a safe(ish) spot for him to fish Ryan out, pull him to solid ground.

Ryan who’s been doing his best not to drown, trying to remember all the things you’re supposed to do in that kind of situation and certain he’s going to die out here and Michael will bitch about how fucking stupid he was for the rest of his life, because of course he would.

And then there are hands grabbing at him and he’s being pulled out of the water and onto land and he gets a glimpse of a too-familiar face (annoying as hell and goddamn Ryan hates the little shit so much) before he passes out.

Wakes up who knows how much later in this dusty, rickety old cabin in the middle of nowhere freezing his ass off and also kind of without the clothes he was wearing earlier?

Musty blanket and jacket he doesn’t recognize thrown over him and someone (with an accent) muttering to themselves as they struggle to start a fire and what the hell happened?

He must say something or make too much noise while getting his bearings because the hacker whips around clutching a sad little book of matches in his hand and looking like a trapped animal as he watches Ryan nervously.

“Ah, hello,” the hacker says with this awkward little laugh. “You’re awake?”

And then, you know.

Ryan finding out the hacker dragged Ryan all the way up here just as the snowstorm hit and did what he could to warm him up. Was just starting to work at getting a fire started to warm things up faster when Ryan woke up and looks like they’re going to be stuck up here for a while, you know?Ryan half-frozen and clearly in no shape to hike down the mountain even if the storm wasn’t shaping up to be a bastard of a storm. (Supposed to last a couple of days, dump a significant amount of snow and no one in their right might would be out in it.)

And Gavin is still staring at him warily, keeps out of arm’s reach and skittish as hell and with the flickering light from the lantern Gavin managed to light Ryan can see how tired he looks?

Exhausted and run ragged (literally) and just as beat up after the last however long he’s been on the run. (Way before Ryan and Michael got pulled into things, that’s for damn sure.)

“Oh,” Gavin says, and fishes Ryan’s phone out of his pocket. “Michael wanted you to call him back when you woke up.”

Which.

What.

Gavin shrugs and explains that after he ~borrowed Ryan’s phone off him earlier that day, the day before in one of their face-to-face confrontations Michael called it expecting to get Ryan.

Turns out he’d been doing some Investigating, talked to a hacker buddy of a friend of his (Matt and Jeremy, respectively) and found out the asshole businessman/politician who hired them didn’t tell them everything.

That oh, hey, maybe it would be a good idea to keep Gavin alive and meet back in Los Santos somewhere to discuss what their next move was because they’re pretty much guaranteed to end up dead if they don’t. (The businessman/politician intending to double-cross them and either get them thrown in jail or outright killed rather than risk loose threads and such. What with that being the case with all the others they sent after Gavin and just. Yeah.)

And of course Gavin was like, ??? and talked to Michael about things and they’ve got this truce/understanding thing going on and Michael telling him Ryan’s a stubborn fuck and it might take a while for him to come around. (Also, don’t let the idiot die if at all possible.)

Gavin wary of a trap, but also this tiny grain of hope maybe things wouldn’t end with him dead, and then the bridge and the river and that moment of hesitation he feels guilty/ashamed of as he hands back Ryan’s phone.

Battery’s almost dead and there’s a sliver of a signal up this high/remote location, but the fact Gavin gave it back is…promising?

Not exactly trust but pretty damn close, and Ryan calls Michael and isn’t sure if the asshole hears him or what, but he tells him about their current situation and a place they could meet in a few days before it completely cuts off/dies and then, well.

Then it’s him and Gavin and this cabin in the middle of nowhere and ALL the huddling for warmth and sharing stories and FEELINGs.

Soft looks when Gavin falls asleep somewhere in there, exhausted as hell and the kind of trust/nothing left to do so in Ryan’s presence after everything they’ve been through.

Usual romcom stuff and when the weather clears and they make their way down the mountain to meet up with Gavin run into some baddies and have to fight their way free.

Another day or so to get to the meeting spot with Michael – small town nearby and this abandoned gas station or something like that on the outskirts.

So of course the asshole businessman/politician and his musclebound goons show up. There’s all these veiled/not-so-veiled threats thrown Ryan’s way when it’s obvious he Knows Too Much.

But maybe, the asshole says. There’s a way out of this for Ryan, because the asshole businessman/politician could use resourceful people like Ryan and Michael. Just let him have Gavin and keep his secrets and he and Michael could be looking at a lucrative job offer, if Ryan knows what he means.

Gavin getting all twitchy and fidgety because it’s a good deal, and really, they’re not friends, him and Ryan and Ryan would get to live. (He wouldn’t blame Ryan at all for accepting the offer, maybe tells him with this odd little smile it’s a good deal, you know? Ryan would be a fool to turn it down.)

Ryan watching Gavin who won’t meet his eyes and of course he’s going to tell the asshole businessman/politician to go to hell – even if he hadn’t caught feelings for Gavin he would have – but Gavin seems to think he won’t, and that’s just.

Ryan doesn’t know, really, because one of the goons gets impatient and goes for Gavin and Ryan just reacts – no conscious thought to it at all – and the goon’s on the ground howling about the knife in his leg and Ryan sweeping Gavin behind him before the shooting starts.

They get pinned down and have that Intense Eye Contact Moment where they’re sure they’re about to die and ~confess their love?

But that’s when Michael and Jeremy barrel on in, driving one of Jeremy’s ridiculous Rimmy Tim-ified vehicles and maybe hitting a goon or two along the way.

More shooting and yelling, but this time the odds are more in Ryan and Gavin’s favor and by the time the smoke clears the asshole businessman/politician’s escaped and the goons he left behind are super dead.

Also, the realization they’re all fucked now, because the asshole businessman/politician is definitely going to spin things to make them the villains of the story and him as the Upstanding Citizen most people know him as and, wow, okay, not cool?

But whatever because Ryan and Gavin are being totally obvious about their mutual feelings to the point Jeremy who doesn’t even know them can see it. (And he’s an idiot, as Michael can attest to. Like. Christ, it took forever for Jeremy to realize Michael was flirting with him and they were living together for months before the asshole caught on to the fact they were dating??? Like fucking Christ, what is Michael’s life???)

They end up having to ~go underground in Los Santos to avoid being murderized by various peoples, and people think they’re just another gang/crew in the city so why the hell not live it up, or something.

Hitting back at the businessman/politician by going after his ~unsavory allies and from the outside it looks like any other criminal squabbles, you know?

Rimmy Tim was a joke, but it becomes Jeremy’s Thing. Mogar happens when Michael picks up the leather jacket with the snarling wolf’s head at a thrift shop and someone asks him a dumb question and things go from there.

Gavin is just. He makes the most of being a little shit, and everyone despairs of the day he and Matt meet properly because oh, God, no.

Ryan embraces the stupid skull mask because Michael still won’t leave it alone (and also keeps people from recognizing him). Gavin’s the one with the idea for the face paint, some stupid joke that suddenly wasn’t one day.

(And oh God. Gavin being the one to do his face paint that first time, before they got their shit together and the intimacy of being that close to one another and touching Ryan’s face? Getting him to turn his head for a better angle to work with using a light press of his fingers and sudden  awareness of everything about something like that and FEELINGS and maybe, maybe, that’s the first time they kiss?

OR.

Some awkward throat clearing and eyes being averted with all the !!! of realizing the oh, no he’s hot thing is NOT going to go away anytime soon, what do???)

At some point Geoff and Jack and the people they stole away from Burnie and the Roosters happen and they join forces because wouldn’t you know it? Part of the reason Geoff and Jack and everyone they brought with them are even in Los Santos has to do with the asshole businessman/politician.

Bastard making a grab for Rooster-held territory and/or interests to the point they felt they needed more of a presence in the city, which is where the Fake AH Crew comes in.

And then just.

A lot of shenanigans and assholes getting along too fucking well for anyone’s peace of mind?

Also, also.

Ryan and Gavin finally getting their shit together and smooching the fuck out of each other. (Maybe there’s one close call too many, or Pretend Married for a job, or just. Absent-minded kiss and then the !!! and following panic before they’re like.

WAIT.

Realize they’re basically an old married couple at this point and are like >:((((((((((((( at all the time they wasted when they could have been smooching and so on instead and decide to make up for it.

(The others go from being amused to exasperated to annoyed as fuck in quick succession because goddamn they’re the worst, okay. Sappy motherfuckers who are also assholes and do what they can to make everyone’s life a misery, sometimes even intentionally.)

[spaceskam]

a way to decide if the light is still red

Summary: michael has a breakdown, they have to bring in the big guns (title: silk by isaac lewis)

Maria woke up to someone crying.

The main reason it wasn't immediately clear who was crying was because she couldn't remember a time Michael Guerin had cried. He was a self-proclaimed tough guy, a hard ass if there ever was one. He didn't cry. He didn't ball up in the corner of the room in the middle of the night. He didn't have real problems.

Except he did and he was just damn good at pretending. 

“Guerin? Are you okay?” Maria asked softly, rubbing the sleep out of her eye. He had his hands folded over the back of his head, his face buried into his knees as he rocked back and forth. He very clearly was not okay.

She crawled out of bed, making her way to the corner he’d stuffed himself in. This was the first night he’d actually stayed over rather than slipped out sometime after she’d gone to sleep. Maybe this is why.

“Michael, what’s wrong?” she asked, crouching down and gently touching his arm. However, she was almost immediately thrown away as he cried out a ’no’.

Her back hit the bed with a gentle thud and she stared at him in shock, slowly catching her breath. He seemed to ball up even more, whimpering and shaking and whispering the same ‘no’ over and over and over. Maria sat there for a moment, debating if she should try to console him again or not. She decided against it and went for her phone. She didn’t want to leave him there, but she also wasn’t about to risk getting herself hurt.

“Hello?” Isobel answered, sleep heavy in her voice as if the phone call had woken her up. Maria spared a moment to wonder why she hadn’t felt that he was in distress. Michael had felt when she stubbed her toe the week prior.

“Hey, uh, Michael’s having like some kind of breakdown. He’s crying in the corner and is unresponsive and he won’t let me get near him,” she said, eyeing Michael and seeing if her talking about him shook him out of it. It didn’t.

“What? What do you mean?” Isobel asked and there was shifting on the other side of the line.

“I mean I woke up to him crying in the corner,” Maria repeated, holding the phone out towards him and hoping it caught his whimpering. “I don’t know why and I don’t know what to do about it.”

“Okay, okay, I’ll be there as soon as I can, make sure he doesn’t freak out,” Isobel insisted, hanging up the call. Maria scoffed.

“Yeah, I’ll definitely get on that.”

Maria stood to put a pair of pants on, keeping her eye on Michael. He never made a move outside of rocking, still whimpering and whispering ‘no’. She sat on the bed again. He started pulling at his hair.

“Michael, did you have a bad dream?” she asked, knowing he probably wouldn’t answer. He didn’t.

Isobel showed up in under 15 minutes, somehow looking very put together despite it being two in the morning. She pushed her way into the room, nearing Michael. She crouched in front of him.

“Michael? What’s wrong?” she asked, reaching out to him. Maria was genuinely shocked when he threw her as well, screaming his panic as he desperately tried to back up into the wall. Isobel huffed, slowly making her way back towards him.

Michael threw her three more times before she eventually stopped trying.

“How long has he been like that?” Isobel huffed, rubbing her back. Each time he’d thrown her, he’d gotten a little more touchy and a little harder to get near. He’d started to create some sort of force field around him that would throw you if you tried to push past it. It was getting a little ridiculous.

“At least forty minutes at this point, I guess. I don’t know how long he’s been like that before I woke up,” Maria explained. They both stared at him for a moment, trying to brainstorm ideas on how to break him out of it. She was more than a little nervous that he would be like that forever. He would just pick up more and more shit, becoming a living weapon. Or something. She wasn’t sure that’s how it worked.

“Okay, then I’m going to call Max,” Isobel said. Maria grabbed her arm.

“Is that a good idea? I mean, won’t that just make him more agitated?” Isobel shrugged her shoulders, rubbing her eyes with a yawn.

“I don’t know what else to do,” she said. Maria didn’t have a good argument to get her to stop.

Isobel walked out of the room to go call Max and Maria retreated back to the bed, watching him panic. She felt bad that she couldn’t help. What kind of girlfriend was she? One who was completely oblivious to her boyfriend’s troubles apparently.

Or maybe it was an alien thing. Maybe this had nothing to do with him and his issues and had everything to do with the fact he and Liz had been spending too much time experimenting. That had to be a possibility. It absolutely had nothing to do with the fact that this was their first legit night together.

It took Max and Liz nearly 25 minutes to show up which left far too much time for Maria and Isobel to awkwardly stare at Michael. He was still shaking, rocking, saying his ‘no’, and vaguely crying. She didn’t even know how he had it in him to panic for that long, it was getting to a new level of concern.

“What’s going on?” Liz asked. Maria, again, gave them a rundown of the events. Which just led to them doing the same shit that she and Isobel already tried.

“Michael, seriously, what’s wrong?” Max asked as if that would help before being thrown due to trying to enter Michael’s power bubble.

“C’mon, Mikey, it’s okay. Let us help,” Liz cooed, basically petting the force field. Max stood behind her just in case Michael tried to throw her.

They tried and tried and tried and tried and tried until eventually, they couldn’t even enter the bedroom anymore due to the size of the force field. Nothing was fucking working. In fact, it was debatably making it worse. Maria couldn’t help but feel even more pity as she stared at him, watching him sob into his knees. Each time they’d tried to push past the force field, it seemed to directly affect him in the worst way. She couldn’t count the number of times she had to listen to him scream and not be able to help because he wouldn’t let her.

“Okay, what do we do now?” Maria asked, anxiously chewing on her nails. It had escalated from a minor inconvenience to having a literal ticking time bomb in her bedroom. Isobel and Max shared a look.

“I’m gonna go call Alex,” Max decided. Maria furrowed her eyebrows.

“Why? What can Alex do that we haven’t already?” she asked. She knew she was sounding a bit naive, but she had effectively worked herself into functioning denial. Michael had insisted that whatever happened between the two of them had been long over and she had decided to listen. Even if it meant Alex went out of his way to avoid her now.

“How much do you know about the two of them?” Isobel asked cautiously as Max took a step aside to call him. Maria crossed her arms over her chest as she looked over to Michael. She realized she didn’t know a single goddamn detail outside of them sharing a kiss back in high school and Alex still pining years later. “Look, I guess I don’t know much either, but I do know Alex is our best bet. He’s spent more nights with him over the years than anyone else.” Maria would be lying if she said that didn’t make her feel sick.

No one questioned it when Alex somehow managed to pull up to the Wild Pony in under 20 minutes when his cabin was a solid 35 minutes away.

The four of them watched as Alex trudged up the stairs with nothing but sheer annoyance on his face. Maria held more shame than she wanted to admit. How pathetic was it that they had to resort to calling her boyfriend’s ex-something so he could calm down? A selfish part of her hoped it wouldn’t work.

“What exactly is going on?” Alex asked as he reached the apartment door. He looked more than a little exhausted and she was regretting letting Max call him more and more by the minute.

“We went to bed and he was fine, but when I woke up, he was crying in the corner of my room. He won’t let anyone near him, he’d created this giant force field type of thing around him and it keeps getting bigger each time we try to get close. It’s basically my entire bedroom now,” Maria explained, hoping to do her best at dropping hints that they were in fact together. It was petty, but she couldn’t help it. Alex’s eyebrows knitted together.

“A force field?” he repeated. They all nodded. “How long has he been like that?”

“An hour and a half, maybe two hours,” Isobel said, looking to Maria for confirmation. Alex’s eyes nearly bulged out of his head, his lips parting in disbelief.

“Two hours? You fucked with him for two fucking‒” Alex cut himself off, closing his eyes and taking a deep, regulated breath, “Next time, if you can’t calm him down in 20 minutes, call me.”

“We’re not even sure if he’s awake,” Max jumped in. Alex scoffed.

“He has night terrors and he’s really good at waking himself up within 15 minutes. He’s been awake, he’s just fucking terrified,” he said, giving a tight smile.

“We didn’t know,” Liz murmured.

“You should’ve! He’s supposedly your best friend, your brother, your boyfriend and none of you even knew that he had fucking night terrors. It’s something you all should’ve known one way or another,” he snapped. Maria was slowly feeling every ounce of guilt and jealousy slip from her grasp, easily being replaced with irritation.

“It’s not like he tells us,” Maria argued, crossing her arms over her chest and slightly popping her him to the side. Alex let out a dry laugh, shaking his head.

“You all think his walls are so fucking high. They aren’t. I don’t know if you’ve noticed, but Michael talks a lot. He’s hurting and he had been since the day I met him. He wants to talk, he wants to vent, but he feels like a burden, so he stops himself,” Alex said, glaring in a painfully protective manner, “All you have to do is ask twice.”

Maria hated her abilities for a moment. She could feel the guilt build up in the small space until it became suffocating. Clearly, there had been occasions where they all had been dismissive and never asked twice.

“You don’t have to be a dick about it, Alex,” Maria stated simply. He snorted.

“Oh, I think I am perfectly justified in being a dick. You woke me up because you don’t know how to take care of your boyfriend when he needs you,” Alex said simply. It was a low blow and she couldn’t help but glare.

“Then why the hell did you come?”

“Because I love him and he needs me,” Alex admitted, not a trace of a lie to be found on his features, “And he would be right there if I needed him. It’s what you do for family.”

The word ’family’ hung in the air even when he turned swiftly and made his way into the apartment. She wanted to take it as another low blow, but she couldn’t. Instead, she took a deep breath and followed him inside.

The four of them hardly kept their distance as Alex felt for the force field, stopping in his tracks once he touched it. He took a heavy breath and forced on a kind smile.

“Guerin,” he called. For the first time in hours, his curly head popped up. His face was sunken in and tear stained and red; his eyes were frantic.

“Alex?”

Maria gulped as she watched Alex’s fake smile become real.

“Yeah.”

“Really?”

“Really.”

“Are you okay?”

Alex let out a soft laugh as he said, “I’m fine. You can check if you let me in.”

Michael nodded immediately even though he stayed in the corner and the force field visibly morphed to accommodate for Alex’s entrance. It snapped back in place once he entered.

“Did you know you could create a force field?” Alex asked softly. Michael reached out his right hand, pathetically making a grabby motion not too unlike a toddler except instead of a toy, it was Alex Manes. “I didn’t. I think it’s pretty cool.”

He slowly lowered himself onto the ground in front of the alien and, once he landed, Michael rocked forward and landed against Alex’s chest with a thud. They sat in silence for a moment, Micahel laying against him and gripping his shirt as tight as he could. There was something painful about the way he calmed each time Alex ran his fingers through his hair. He didn’t do that for Maria.

Soon, their foreheads met and the comfort wafted off of them in overwhelming waves. Michael was staring at him like he was the most precious thing in the world, stroking his cheek with his left hand.

“Why wouldn’t you let anyone come near you?” Alex asked. Michael’s bottom lip protruded in a pout, his grip on Alex’s shirt tightening.

“I thought something bad happened to you,” he whimpered. Alex smiled sweetly, still flitting his fingers through his hair.

“So, what you’re saying is that if something does happen to me, you’re just going to hide out in a force field forever?” Alex asked. Michael sniffled loudly and gave a weak shrug. Alex huffed a laugh. “Well, you’re in luck,” he hummed, grabbing Michael’s calves and pulling him basically into his lap, “I’m not going anywhere.”

Maria turned away, letting her back hit the wall beside the open doorway.

“So, what, am I supposed to just give over my bedroom to my boyfriend and his ex for the night?” Maria scoffed. All the looks that turned her way made her question if she should even still be considering him her boyfriend. Maybe she shouldn’t.

This was going to be a long night.

[pokii-jonas]

Two Times Oblivious Equals Disaster Gays

a short fic based off of this text post!!! (this is really short for me and i’m proud of myself 😂 i like where i ended it, but if y’all want i can continue this! hope you all enjoy!)

WARNINGS—

sympathetic deceit

***

Deceit jerked up in bed at the sudden wave of negative energy that sent a chill through the mindscape.

Letting out a long sigh, he fell onto his back with a small grunt as he felt blindly for his phone on his bedside table.

Finally hitting it, he squinted as the screen brightness hit his tired eyes.

“It’s too early for this, Roman.” he mumbled to himself as he clicked Roman’s contact and began texting.

12:15 am — dee 🐍: that you?

12:16 am — roMAN of my life ❤️: ... maybe?

12:16 am — dee 🐍: what am i gonna do with you??

12:16 am — roMAN of my life ❤️: uh, the same as usual probably?

12:17 am — dee 🐍: solid point. on it.

12:18 am — dee 🐍: [sent pic attachment] [sent pic attachment] [sent pic attachment] [sent pic attachment] [sent pic attachment]

12:19 am — roMAN of my life ❤️: omg OOFH, i shall always stan cole sprouse but uh, i think you accidentally sent the wrong one in there? 😂👑

12:19 am — dee 🐍: really? where?

12:23 am — roMAN of my life ❤️: ...?

12:19 am — roMAN of my life ❤️: the one of you ha ha

12:20 am — dee 🐍: you mean this one? [sent pic attachment]

12:20 am — roMAN of my life ❤️: what? no, that’s just another picture of you. i mean the one you accidentally sent earlier.

12:21 am — dee 🐍: sorry, this one? [sent pic attachment]

12:22 am — roMAN of my life ❤️: why do you keep sending me different pictures of yourself???? i mean this one that you accidentally sent first [sent pic attachment]

12:23 am — dee 🐍: oh yeah. i know i sent it.

12:23 am — dee 🐍: [sent pic attachment]

12:25 am — roMAN of my life ❤️: omg i’m so stupid—

12:25 am — dee 🐍: do you get it now? ;)

12:26 am — roMAN of my life ❤️: yes omg

12:26 am — roMAN of my life ❤️: that’s so funny!!! 😂😂😂👑

Deceit did a quick double take.

12:27 am — dee 🐍: yeah?

12:28 am — roMAN of my life ❤️: yes omg, you keep sending pics of yourself “accidentally”

12:28 am — roMAN of my life ❤️: i legit cannot believe i didn’t realize you were purposely sending those pics

12:28 am — roMAN of my life ❤️: and all just to get me to laugh, ugh you’re the best 🥰😁❤️👑

12:29 am — roMAN of my life ❤️: thanks for that, i needed it 😁

12:29 am — roMAN of my life ❤️: but i’ll let you go now! sorry for waking you 😂💕👑

Staring at his phone, face slack in shock, Deceit quickly realized that Roman did not get the hint.

He was pulled back to reality, however, when his phone slipped out of his hands and smacked him directly in the face.

He slowly picked his phone up and stared at the messages one last time before replying.

12:32 am — dee 🐍: of course 🐍

Laying his phone back down on his table and snuggling back up underneath his covers, he couldn’t help but mull over the conversation in his head.

‘Surly he isn’t that oblivious, right?’ he thought to himself as he closed his eyes for the night.

*-*-*-*-*

‘He is that oblivious.’ Deceit thought as he attempted to hide his annoyance under his usual layer of cool indifference.

He could feel the mask slipping quickly as he continued to overhear Roman talking to Logan over that mornings coffee.

“Deceit is so great with humour. Instead of sending me pictures of hot celebrities, he replaced all the pictures with himself. Isn’t he hilarious?” Roman gushed happily, not seeming to realize that Deceit was listening in.

‘Come on, Logan. Surely you get it. Point him in the right direction’ Deceit silently encouraged.

However Logan, who was nursing a cup of hot coffee, didn’t seem to care much for the conversation and simply replied, “Yes, that is hilarious I assume.”

Deceit couldn’t stop the scowl that settled on his face, so he took a sip of his coffee as he attempted to regain his composure.

As he took his sip, he heard footsteps and another voice enter the kitchen.

“Mornin’—” he heard Virgil mumble, along with the tell tale signs of a mug being set on the counter.

“Ah, yes, good morning Virgil. Now if you will both excuse me, I have a lot to get done today.” Logan said, clanking his cup into the sink and walking back to his room.

“He was in a hurry. What were you talking his ear off about this time?” Virgil asked in his usual sarcastic tone.

“Not much. Just about the funny thing Deceit did last night.” Roman said happily, quick to jump on the next person who was willing to listen to him.

“Oh? I didn’t know that he ever did anything funny. It’s not like you talk about him every single day.” Virgil said and Deceit was certain he could hear his eye roll from where he sat in the living room.

“Oh come on, I definitely do not! Just read these messages we shared last night!” Roman said excitedly.

Virgil gave a quick groan, but silence ensued anyway and Deceit held his breath. Maybe Virgil would spell it out for him?

After a few seconds of silence, Virgil let out a small snort.

“And why is this funny?” he asked, taking a long slurp of his coffee.

“Well, usually when I’m a bit down, he’ll send me pictures of people I have crushes on, yeah? Last night, however, he started to send me pictures of himself instead!” Roman said with a loud, boisterous laugh that usually made Deceit smile. This time however, he couldn’t help himself from face palming at Roman’s obliviousness.

There was a short silence and then all of a sudden laughter from Virgil.

“Oh my god, Princy.” Virgil wheezed out and Deceit listened closely.

“I know!” Roman exclaimed, laughing a little as well, but not as long as Virgil who stayed wheezing and laughing for a good five minutes.

“Oh yeah Ro, he’s hilarious.” Virgil said at last as he thumped off of the counter and back to the floor.

“He’s really something.” Virgil said and Deceit looked up to find Virgil leaning against the door frame looking at him.

“Dude, how is he so oblivious?” Virgil whispered quietly and Deceit responded with an exasperated sigh.

“Please, keep telling me about it.” he replied, dripping sarcasm.

Virgil gave a quick snort before saying, “Well good luck with that one.”

Giving a quick salut to Deceit who was trying desperately, but quietly, to get Virgil to come back, Virgil sunk back to his room with a manic grin on his face.

Before Deceit could even let out an exasperated sigh, he heard Roman’s well known loud footsteps approaching and was greeted with Roman’s head peaking out the door.

“Virgil? Where’d you go, I wasn’t done—” Roman began, but as his and Deceit’s eyes met he froze.

“Good evening, Roman.” Deceit said, hiding his immediate panic at getting caught eavesdropping and going back to reading his book.

“It’s morning though?”

“I know what I said.”

“Oh... Ohhhhh! I get it!” Roman exclaimed laughing, earning a confused yet admiring look from Deceit that went unnoticed.

“So how are you today Ro?” Deceit asked calmly, letting down his walls little by little upon hearing Roman’s beautiful laugh.

“Sooooooooooo much better!” Roman said happily, sitting down directly next to Deceit of the sofa and wrapping his arms around him.

Deceit felt himself relax into Roman’s touch as he replied, “That’s good.”

Roman placed his chin on Deceit’s shoulder and they stayed like that for a minute, simply enjoying each other’s company.

At the first sign of more footsteps approaching them, however, they quickly split apart. Neither one noticing the heavy blush that stained both of their cheeks.

“Hey you two!” Patton greeted cheerfully, sitting down across from them with a bowl of frosted flakes.

“Padre!” Roman exclaimed, maybe a little too loudly and happily to be honest, but no one noticed.

“Morning.” Deceit greeted, maybe a little more quiet and reserved than usual, but no one noticed.

*-*-*-*-*

Roman couldn’t stop pacing up and down his room.

Should he text him? He was always usually the first one to text. Maybe he should wait a few more minutes. He could be busy.

Roman stopped in front of his phone for a second before beginning pacing again.

Deceit was filling his mind. Maybe he was going crazy?

“AH!” Roman shouted exasperated, collapsing backwards onto his bed.

‘Are friends supposed to feel this way about each other?’ he thought vaguely, but was interrupted with a snake hiss coming from his phone.

Roman may have well vaulted for his phone, quick to open the new message from Deceit.

3:55 pm — dee dee 💛🐍💛: [sent pic attachment]

A wide smile immediately overtook his face as he looked at a selfie of Deceit sticking his tongue out.

3:56 pm — Prince 👑: still at this, are we? 😂👑

3:57 pm — dee dee 💛🐍💛: of course. unless... you want me to stop?

A frown replaced Roman’s smile.

3:58 pm — Prince 👑: why would i want you to stop?? 🧐

3:58 pm — dee dee 💛🐍💛: you said it yourself this morning.

3:59 pm — dee dee 💛🐍💛: i usually send you pictures of your crushes to make you feel better.

Roman froze, looking down at his phone with confusion.

4:01 pm — Prince 👑: i’m confused...

4:01 pm — Prince 👑: what does that have to do with you sending pictures of yourself though??

~~~

Dropping his phone, Deceit picked up his pillow and pressed it to his face as he let out a scream of frustration.

“No, okay. Okay Deceit.” he said, throwing the pillow away from himself and onto the floor. “You cannot kill your love interest, you cannot kill your love interest—”

Taking a deep breath, Deceit picked back up his phone.

4:04 pm — dee 🐍: why in the world do i love you? 💛

***

[sereneskz]

police be mine | bang chan

• format: series

• pairing: bang chan x female reader

[part i] , [part ii]

“Y/N!”

“Y/N get your ass up!”

“Oh my gosh, are you dead woman?”

The exclamations of a pretty frustrated voice filled your eyes, even registered in your brain, however your eyes refused to open and give in.

Murmuring incoherent words, you rolled away from the source in an attempt to block the noise.

You weren’t very successful though as you soon felt two hands grip and shake your physique, turning you towards the person once again.

You let out a groan in protest and raised your hands to pry off the fingers clasped around your forearms.

“Y/N do you really want to be late on the first day of your first job?!”

Minho’s words turned a certain mechanism in your brain as your eyes fluttered open with sudden realisation.

‘Oh crap!’ You thought as you abruptly sat and ended up smashing your forehead with your roommate’s.

You and Minho let out a synchronised groan in pain as both your guys’ hands flew up to soothe the area.

“Jeez Y/N, way to thank me for waking you up,” Minho hissed, standing up to get off the bed.

“Hey, I got hurt too,”  You defended as you threw the covers off of your body.

“What’s the time?” You enquire, struggling to locate your phone although you swear you left it on your nightstand last night.

“6:45,” Minho held up the said object, the lock screen displaying the exact digits.

“Shit! I am so screwed!” You grab your phone and rush into the bathroom, only to re-enter as you realise you forgot to take your clothes.

Minho shakes his head as he observes you, wondering how on earth you would survive without him and leaves the room feeling rather pleased with himself.

Following the speediest shower you had ever taken, you rummage through your drawers to find your watch and head out after grabbing your bag and any other required items.

Upon entering the living room, you find Minho sprawled onto the couch on his phone with a random tv show playing in the background.

Clasping the watch around your wrist, you gather all your things and shove them into your bag.

“Eat something,” Minho’s voice interrupts your journey to the end of the hallway.

“There’s legit no time, it’s too l-,”

“It takes only ten seconds to go into the kitchen and grab something. Plus, we all know how you get when you’ve got nothing in your stomach,”

Minho’s reasoning has you contemplating before you turn back, concluding he’s right.

Being late and going to work on an empty stomach doesn’t sound like the most optimal plan.

Jogging to the fridge, you hurriedly grab an apple along with a bottle of water, all while balancing everything else in your hands.

“By the way, I’ve had actual jobs before this,” you call out as you make your way down the hallway.

“Working part-time at the convenience store around the corner isn’t the most popular career option, Y/N,” He retaliated, his smirk evident in his tone.

“Your really making me question my decision of sharing an apartment with you,”  

“If it weren’t for me you’d still be laying in bed and waving off your job before it even began,”

He was right but he won’t hear you admitting that anytime soon.

You rolled your eyes and skipped out the front door, struggling to cram your right foot into the shoe.

~ 7:21 am ~

“Way to make an impression!’ You thought as you entered the police station.

A rookie officer, almost half an hour late on her first official day of work. How admirable.

Luckily you lived close to a bus stop and got there, well, before it got any later than it already was.

“Oof, someone’s mistaken the police station for their house it seems. Coming and going at their own leisure,” Miyoung sneered as she moved past you.

Miyoung was also a junior officer and someone who you were clearly not on the best terms with. It wasn’t explainable, she just wastes no opportunity to get under your skin despite the fact that you’ve never really done her any harm.

However, that might change considering you both are going to be working under the same roof.

Ignoring her remark with a frown upon your face, you walk towards your desk and plop yourself down on the chair.

Although this was your first official day, you were toured around the station with some other junior officers beforehand, given an introductory brief and assigned your own places.

Because of the orientation, the environment didn’t seem uncomfortable and nor were you clueless about what to do.

But the mistake of being late on the first day was clawing at you from the inside.

“Y/n, you’re late,” A voice informed as you set down your things.

You turned to find Hyunjin, leaning forward on the divider that separated your side from his.

“Yeah, on my first day. Couldn’t get any worse could it?” Was your sarcastic reply as you began to organise your space to find that your nameplate was missing.

‘Where on earth is my nameplate?’ You inwardly question as you start to look for it.

“Actually, I wouldn’t be too confident,” Hyunjin drew out.

You looked up at him, confused, and halted your search with your hand still situated in the drawer.

“The senior officer checked on us this morning. During which, he obviously found out you weren’t here and ordered to have you in his office as soon as you arrived,” Your heart sank.

A sign left your lips as you cursed at yourself for not being able to fall asleep earlier last night. As a result, another person was going to taunt their way into your mind about how unprofessional you were acting.

Hyunjin grimaced seeing your distressed expression, guilt filling him.

“Hey, it can’t be that bad. Perhaps, he just wants to ensure your not going to be late next time,” He tried to ease your stress but to no avail.

Exactly how he was going to make sure you weren’t going to repeat your mistake, was what had you worried.

“That’s if there is a next time,”

You stood up and made your way to the chief officer’s workroom.

Standing in front of the door, you contemplated if your first day at your ideal job was going to be the last.

He wouldn’t possibly fire you without another chance, right? Maybe a warning? More paperwork? Overtime?

Your panel interviews were all held by various representatives of the police who were in charge of recruitment and the tour was given to you by them as well, so you had obviously never met this officer personally.

Although you heard enough about him to picture what he’d be like. He’s said to be very skilled at his work and belongs to the group of the most elite officers the police force has. No wonder he is a chief officer at one of the busiest precincts in the city at a rather young age. Apart from the work-related stuff, barely anyone in the work force is close enough to him to know what he’s like in his private life.

‘He’s probably never been late his entire life!’

‘I bet he’s a crank ass, as well,”

Thinking it’s do or die at this point, you knocked on the door to prevent yourself from appearing even more unpunctual than you already were.

“Come in,” A faint voice sounded.

Cautiously, you entered into the office, keeping your hands behind your back and stood in front of the large desk positioned in the centre of the room. Your heart drummed against your rib cage, a clear sign of your anxiety.

The first thing you saw were numerous files piled up on one side and a few opened up along with other papers scattered across the table.

The next thing was the mop of blonde hair but you were unable to see the face as his neck was bent while he tended to his work.

He looked up at the sound of your footsteps and you swear your heart stopped beating for a solid 5 seconds.

This was definitely far from the visual you conceptualised in your head when you thought of what the chief officer looked like.

Furthermore, you would’ve praised whoever in the universe created the very man sitting in front of you if it weren’t for the pair of eyes that looked like they could consume you whole with a single gaze or the twisting feeling in your stomach which told you that this wasn’t going to be an easy ride.

[planetsam]

Prompt: Alex & Rath AU continuation where they have that talk they were meant to have, please.

Follow up to this: HERE. Because apparently having Astrea going on ao3 isn’t enough to stop me from continuing Alex and Rath in this format if I’m prompted. 

His top three mornings on Antar are the first, the day after they win, and the one where he wakes up with Alex in his arms. 

Alex is cool against him. When he was a kid he always dreamed that one day he’d have a place where he could be with Alex and not have to worry. Now that it’s here he’s almost afraid of it. If he breathes too loudly or moves to quick will it break? His fingers almost tremble as he touches Alex’s skin. The last time he was tan from the sun. Now he’s paler. But Alex is the same, same warm tone but cool skin. Michael traces along the cuts of muscle and the new scars. He’s adapted to the Antar mindset and each of Alex’s scars fill him with pride and awe at his survival. A soft huff of laughter draws his eyes up as he skims his fingers over a line on Alex’s hipbone. Alex is awake, watching him. Michael flattens his hand and puts them level again.

“Morning,” he says. Alex smiles, “how was sleeping for twelve hours?”

“Not as amazing as the wakeup,” Alex say with a smile that Michael swears he feels in his toes. He kisses Alex slow and soft, taking the time to feel every languid slide of their mouths and hands. Alex makes a low sound of encouragement, but there’s none of the tension or desperation that he usually exhibits after, “but I have to file my debrief,” he says. Michael drops his head to his collar bone with a groan that makes Alex laugh, “I’m sorry!”

“Why is it when I get cockblocked it’s by the US military?” He demands, no actual anger in his tone. Alex pushes his curls from his forehead and Michael leans into the touch.

“I guess you’re just that special,” he says.

Michael flops over as Alex gets out of bed. Michael watches as he slides on his leg and then grabs the dark robe. He fastens it easily and gets up, managing to wear it more naturally than Michael is sure he’s pulled off. Ever. Even though he was literally made to be in those robes. There’s also the fact that Alex is wearing it commando and only they know which, again, might be the best use of those robes ever. He watches as Alex gets up and goes over to his bag, pulling out a slim laptop and a pair of spectacles. 

He’s definitely trying to kill him, Michael decides watching him put them on and begin to work. Michael groans loudly until Alex tears his eyes from the computer. Michael props his head up on his hand and looks at him. Alex considers him for a moment and then picks up the laptop, coming back over. Michael tries to look as innocent as he possibly can. Alex looks at him steadily before getting back into bed, on top of the covers.

“Don’t even think about it,” he warns.

Michael holds up his hands, he isn’t denying distracting him crossed his mind but hey if it gets Alex on the bed he’s willing to behave. Or at least try to. At the very least though he’s willing to get up and make them both coffee or the Antar equivalent. It’s when he’s out of bed that there is a knock on the door. Michael’s eyes narrow and he grabs his robe with his powers, flinging it on. Apparently it’s commando day in this part of the palace. When he opens the door though, he’s suprised to see Isobel standing there looking almost nervous. She fidgets slightly with her fingers. Isobel and fidgeting are two things that don’t go together and alarm bells go off in Michael’s head.

“I need to talk to you,” she says.

“Is this about Alex?” He asks.

“Sort of—“ Michael turns as Alex bolts up from the bed. Isobel peers around the corner and her face falls, “damn,” she mutters.

“What’s going on?” Michael questions, stepping aside so she can come into the room.

“It got out Alex came back here,” she says, “people are questioning the peace treaty and if he was a double agent,” she explains, looking at Alex apologetically, “they’ve already locked down the portal.”

“What?!” Michael says.

“They think you seduced him during the talks.”

“That’s insane,” Michael says, “he seduced me way before then—“

He turns to see Alex sitting looking completely horrified. Michael thinks anyone whose accusing Alex of not doing his job is out of their fucking minds. But Alex is in a far more complicated position. Michael goes over to where he’s sitting on the bed, lost in his own thoughts and drops next to him, making sure their legs touch. That at least startles Alex enough for him to look at him and Michael grabs his hands, ignoring the way Alex stiffens in surprise.

“Look at me,” he says, “no-one knows the whole story. We can explain what happened,” he says, “and why the idea of these not being legit is completely insane,” he cups Alex’s cheek, desperate to get him to focus anywhere but his miserable thoughts, “You’re not a traitor. We know that and someone else does too or they would just throw this thing out. We just gotta tell them about high school—“

“You seduced me,” Alex cuts in.

“Huh?” Michael says.

“You seduced me,” Alex repeats, “you played the guitar for me.”

“In the shed you invited me to camp out in,” Michael says.

“I was being nice!”

“So was I,” Michael protests.

“Okay!” Isobel cuts them off, “this is nauseatingly cute but it’s not good,” she says, “I’m sorry, but if you two do this fling it’s not going to help. If you break up—“

“Hey!” Michael cuts in, “we’re not—“ he looks at Alex.

“We haven’t been on an official date,” he explains, “this was a surprise trip on my part, I got swept up in the moment—“ 

“Clearly trying to seduce me again,” Michael cuts in, earning a nudge from Alex, “we’ve been out though, slapping a title on it doesn’t change that right?”

Alex looks at him dryly.

“I can see why you think i seduced you,” He says and continues past Michael’s feigned outrage, “What are you suggesting?”

“Something slightly more serious,” isobel says.

Michael stares at her. She cannot possibly be suggesting what he thinks she might be suggesting.  He looks at Alex. Alex is a solider, a warrior. He thinks that them both being in Antarian robes is the most Alex has been out of the closet in a long, long time. Alex isn’t immediately refuting the ludicrous idea which means its on him.

“No. Absolutely not. We are not getting fake married for the peace of two worlds.”

“Married?!” Alex says.

“I was thinking engaged,” Isobel says, “arranged marriages are common here. Technically Michael and I were in an arranged marriage. We just didn’t get married, but we didn’t date before we were engaged.”

He opens his mouth to deny this is ever going to happen, when he realizes the same denial isn’t coming from the man sitting next to him on the bed. Alex looks stricken but he hasn’t immediately shot the idea down. He looks at Isobel and then at Alex and then gets up. 

“Get out,” he says.

“Excuse me?” Isobel demands. 

“Get out I need to talk to Alex,” he says. 

Isobel rolls her eyes but leaves. Michael smiles just slightly as he turns around. He may have always wanted to kick a sibling out of his room because he had a boy over. This boy, to be precise. Or man. Who is sitting there with his most concentrated face. 

“So, uh, I can call her off,” Michael says, “or, we could do it,” he looks at him, “this kind of feels like an ‘us’ discussion,” he hesitates and then continues shyly, “you didn’t say no.”

Alex hangs his head, rubbing his face. He’s right, he didn’t say no. He wouldn’t say no. Their relationship has been so fraught with miscommunication that he knows him being there in robes on Michael’s bed will be less than him objecting.  He looks at Michael who looks stricken but also hopeful. Alex wonders briefly  if the universe is stacked against them, if there’s any point to fighting it like this. But one look at Michael and he has the answer to that.

“I didn’t come back here for the world,” he says, “I came back here for you.”

“But—“ Michael swallows, “marriage?”

“Engagement,” Alex says, “we would date while we were engaged,” he continues, “I’d have to learn the customs of this place—“ he trails off at Michael’s stunned look, “we could be engaged for a while,” he finishes.

“Yeah,” Michael says.

“That’s what dating is working towards anyways right?” He continues, “seeing if you want to marry someone.”

Ten years ago that wasn’t an option on earth. He looks at Michael.

“Can we get married here?” He asks tentatively, wondering if this is over before it’s begun. 

“Oh, yeah, I wrote that into the constitution for  us,” Michael says.

“Ha ha,” Alex replies sarcastically, “seriously though—“ he trails off as Michael looks at him calmly, “you’re not kidding.” 

Michael shakes his head.

“Did you pick out a ring too?” Alex asks and there’s no sarcasm in his voice.

“I wouldn’t dare,” Michael says, “come on.”

He grabs Alex’s hand and leads him to the wall. He steps through and Alex follows him into a dark and cool passage. Several scanners inspect Michael and then let him continue. This place is cool and it’s made of an odd dark purple stone that flickers with light Alex can’t pinpoint the location of. Mostly because Michael is setting a brisk pace and brings him to the dead end. His hand glows red and he presses it to the wall. It vanishes to reveal a gilded door, the rosy gold bright warm in the passage. Michael opens it and pulls him inside. Alex used to like jewelry but it was costume jewelry.

This is definitely not.

It’s the Antar Crown Jewels and there are a lot of them. The purple stone turns rainbow and reflects everything, making the room seem like it’s a geode. There’s crowns and ornaments and if Liz ever seals the deal with Max she is never going to have to buy jewelry again. He recognizes a few pieces Isobel has worn and a few crowns Max has as well. Michael leads him to a section that has a lot of achingly beautiful weapons and ceremonial armor. Michael stops and turns to him.

“This is my section,” he says, “there’s not a lot of rings but I’m sure Max and Iz don’t mind if you wanna look,” he says and brings him over, “it doesn’t have to be a ring but in context—“

Alex looks at the rings. Michael turns away so Alex can’t read his reactions. Alex feels a rush of annoyance and affection towards him as he turns back to the bands. Two stick out at him though, a narrow band of obsidian and an equally narrow one of coppery gold. He picks them up and stands in front of Michael. Surprise goes to happiness and then to something else. Michael’s eyes go bright. 

“What?” Alex asks.

“Which one?” Michael counters and Alex takes his hand and slides the black one up his finger. Michael looks at it and then takes the coppery one, carefully sliding up his finger. Alex looks at him curiously, “this was my grandfathers,” he says holding up his own hand. His gaze softens, “that was my mom’s.”

Alex opens his mouth to offer to give it back but Michael bends and kisses the back of his hand, like this is where it belongs and Alex closes his mouth.

****

Alex comes out of the bathroom wiping his mouth on the back of his hand.

“The last time someone found out about us, they broke your hand with a hammer and started a war,” Alex says.

Michael softens and his lips quirk up.

“So it’s not being engaged to me?”

Alex picks the insecurity in his eyes and crosses the room. He’s sick at the thought of the world knowing but he’s dizzy with the notion he can be in front of Michael and take him in his arms. That they can be together. Still, after everything. He’s desperate to make the insecurity go away and the only way he can think to do that is to cup both of Michael’s cheeks and kiss him. Michael hums into the kiss and then goes silent as it turns hungry and passionate. He whimpers and Alex pulls back, waiting for him to open his eyes.

“Being engaged to you is the only thing that makes this worth it,” he swears. 

 “God, what are we doing?” Michael says helplessly and Alex presses his forehead to his.

“What we have to,” Alex says and Michael tenses, “and what we want to,” Alex tells him.

“Don’t be scared,” Michael says and Alex swallows, “I’m gonna be there with you the whole time,” Alex takes a deep breath, “also your dad only got to me because I was pretending to be human,” he points out. 

“Also he’s dead,” Alex adds.

Michael shakes his head. Alex goes to pull back and Michael holds him. Alex can hear the unspoken plea for one more stolen moment and surrenders without a second thought. He kisses Michael on the mouth and pulls back just enough to whisper in the space between them.

“I love you,” He says. Michael inhales sharply and Alex continues, “I can’t say it to the world first. You don’t have to say—“

“I love you too,” Michael cuts in, Alex feels words rushing through him, “Alex,” he says his name and feels Alex tense, “I’ve loved you this whole time.”

Alex makes a noise and Michael pulls him closer, burying his face in Alex’s neck as they hold each other. For the first time since this all started, he doesn’t feel like a monster in a war. He feels like someone who lost something, who has a chance of getting it back. No, he feels like someone who did get it back. He’s spent years watching reunions, envious of those who got to have them. Now he gets it. 

“We have to go,” Alex says regretfully and Michael shakes his head.

“I’m not used to we,” he admits. 

“Me neither,” Alex replies and something cheeky comes into his eyes and he offers his arm, “shall we?”

“Remind me why we’re engaged again?” Michael says, taking his arm. 

****

“So their biggest problem is that we’re both guys?” Michael demands, “that’s it?” He makes a noise of disgust, “What a bunch of morons.” 

Alex is quiet and Michael frowns, lowering the tabloid in favor of looking at Alex who is laying with his head on Michael’s stomach. Deep in thought. Apparently talking about this isn’t going to tug him out of it so Michael searches for the thing that will. 

“At least you look good in the pictures,” he says. 

No response.

“Hey, remember when the biggest issue was that I was a low life?” He says. Alex’s brow furrows, “I guess now you gotta suffer through being with a—and I quote—‘genocidal maniac who likes to take it up the ass’,” he frowns, “I don’t get the correlation.”

“Ugh,” Alex says and grabs the tabloid, throwing it to the side. 

“Not a fan?”

“I can’t believe we’re on all of them,” Alex finally says, breaking his silence, “people didn’t know I was—“ he waves a hand around. Michael tries not to be distracted by the coppery band.

“Gay?”

“In love with the guy I was fighting,” Alex says. 

“Oh,” Michael grins, “right.”

“How are you smiling?” Alex questions, fully grumpy and Michael shrugs. 

“I guess I’m still enamored with you saying that,” he admits. 

Alex looks at him for a long moment before sighing and picking up the tabloid, adjusting his neck against Michael’s stomach. The picture is not one of the official, stiff portraits thank god. Rather it’s of them walking away from the press conference angled towards each other. Alex looks completely dignified and Michael has his head thrown back, laughing at something Alex has said. The next picture is of Alex standing in front of a plane and underneath it says they have the exclusive scoop of his torrid history of canoodling with the enemy. 

“Your scandal would use the word canoodle,” Michael says taking the magazine back.

Alex turns and buries his face in Michael’s stomach with a groan. 

“Can someone else have a scandal?” He pleas.

****

Three days later Max and Liz are caught by the paparazzi mid-smooch and he gets his wish.

****

“Antarian dances are not meant to have two men dancing them,” the man teaching them starts to protest. 

“Well they are now, so let’s figure it out,” Michael says. 

“General Rath,” he begins. 

“God, look, okay there’s already a ton of scandal going on. So if you don’t want to teach then that’s fine,” Michael says, “but I feel like we already crossed the scandal bridge. It’s two dudes dancing together,” he continues, “the biggest problem is gonna be that everyone wants to dance with Alex, which I get, but as his fiancé the job falls to me.” 

“There’s a lot of dipping,” the tutor says, “in this particular dance. Which you must preform,” he continues.

“Great, Alex you wanna dip or should I?” Michael asks. 

Alex looks at him and at the tutor. The spotlight on him is wildly uncomfortable and every move that Michael tries to make to easier it only seems to make it worse. Finally Alex gets to his feet, walks over and immediately starts to lead them impeccably through the dance. The man has one foot and he’s about a thousand times better at this than Michael has ever been. Michael thinks he’d be more outraged if it wasn’t so hot. And just because Alex is, well, Alex, at the end of it he finds himself very firmly in a dip. 

“Splendid!” The tutor claps his hands together, “simply splendid, you move very well General Manes,” he says. 

Michael steals Alex out into the gardens when the lesson is done and they are very well into the massive hedge maze before he manages to relax, even just a little. But Alex is still quiet and Michael can feel the worry churning through him. Maybe this is too much. It wouldn’t be the first time it was. He looks at Alex but doesn’t try to get him to stop, finally sacrificing the pretense. 

“Talk to me,” he says. When Alex opens his mouth, he looks at him and then closes it before opening it again.

“I’m not used to being in the spotlight,” Alex admits. Michael raises an eyebrow, Alex is every bit the hero he is, “because of who I love. I hid it,” he emphasizes, “I thought we would have time before—“

“We got engaged?”

“We caused a scandal,” Alex admits, “I was hoping to avoid the scandal.” 

Michael manages to bite back his sarcastic remarks that even if all this had never happened they would still be pretty scandalous. Worry sparks in Alex’s eyes and Michael bites on his lower lip before getting in front of him and catching his hands with his own.

“We can talk about it,” he says. Alex sighs, “we can,” he stresses, “we should. Because this all will die down,” he reminds him, “look I’ll go first,” he says, “I hate the attention. But I like the world knowing we’re together,” he explains, “I like not having to hide it.”

“I was used to hiding it,” Alex admits, “I’m used to secrets,” he looks at him, “you were born for this. I wasn’t.”

“Yeah which means you earned it,” Michael stresses, “I just woke up here and they started calling me a General.” 

Alex looks at him quietly before starting to walk again. Michael moves alongside him. They don’t always talk about the start of the war, about what happened while they were trying to kill each other. But Michael thinks they probably should. If they are having all these weird conversations. 

“It must have been hard learning on the job,” Alex says.

“Yeah, since I’ve got no poker face,” Michael points out and Alex smiles.

“I wasn’t going to say anything,” he murmurs. 

Michael laughs as they wander through. Holding left hands, he can feel the band on Alex’s finger and if he moves his the right way, they can click together. The first few drops of rain startle Alex. The fact that startled means he grips Michael’s hand tighter means more to Michael than he has the words to say. Also the rain on Antar is purple. Alex sticks his other hand out and catches the drops, looking at them intently. They make their way back to his room where Alex has been spending most of his nights, since another advantage to the scandal is that them living together in sin is a small one. Comparatively. But that means that Michael gets to kiss Alex on his balcony in the purple rain.

“I hate the attention,” Alex says, “I wish you weren’t worth it.”

Michael laughs into the kiss and pulls Alex into the room, showing him exactly how worth it he is.

Neither of them sees the man waiting there until it’s too late.

***

“Alex! Hold on, just hold on!”

He’s floating, anchored only by Michael’s warmth. His lips are still swollen, that must be why it’s hard to breathe. It’s bright and he feels Michael kiss his hand before his warmth is gone. There’s hands on him, pulling open what he’s wearing and pressing onto his chest. The movements are quick and efficient and Alex doesn’t know why Michael is worried.

He’s floating.

“Michael! Oh my god, whose blood is that?!”

He hears Michael make a wounded noise and he tires to open his eyes but he can’t remember how.

Then the healing starts and he forgets everything altogether. 

****

Michael’s top three mornings pale in comparison to the one where Alex wakes up. 

One moment Michael is drinking coffee and eating toast under Liz’s death glare, the next he’s running to the bed as Alex stares up at him. He’s physical okay, Antar healing is unparalleled. But between being shot and stressed and sleep deprived, his body needs the break. He’s been asleep for the longest two days of Michael’s life. Alex blinks and frowns at him.

“Are you okay?” He asks.

Michael shakes his head.

“You asshole,” he says, “I thought we talked about you throwing yourself in front of me.”

Alex frowns and looks down at his hand.

“Where’s my ring?”

“God,” Michael shakes his head and sits on the edge of the bed, pulling Alex’s ring off his finger where he’s been wearing it next to his own. He slides it on his hand and Alex relaxes, “no more taking hits for me,” he says.

“But I’m going to be your husband,” Alex says, tugging him down weakly, “I have to protect you.”

Michael goes and presses his face to Alex’s shoulder. He’s been listening to his heart and breathing for two days, reminding himself that Alex is still here. That between his powers and his screaming he was able to make sure Alex wasn’t dead. Alex saved him, saved them both, but he is never going back to his old rooms. They’re moving into new ones and he’s not letting Alex out of his sight.

“I think we should get married sooner,” Alex says.

“Not until you promise to never do that again,” Michael says.

Alex smiles. 

****

He doesn’t promise. 

They move the wedding up anyway. 

****

“Get out! Get out get out get out!”

Michael and Alex’s favorite morning starts with getting yelled at.

Isobel is not amused considering the work she’s done to keep them apart. Not that it matters. They’ve managed to wind up in the same room, tangled together. Alex lifts his head as Michael groans and presses his forehead to his shoulder before turning over to his irate sister. 

“You said no more scandals!”

“Iz, the only scandal is how loud you’re yelling,” he says, pushing himself up. Under the sheets, Alex’s hand doesn’t move from the small of his back, “it’s early!”

“You have to get ready,” she says, “we both know how long it takes to do your hair.” 

“She’s right,” Alex says rubbing sleep from his eyes.

“Don’t take her side, she’s just your sister in law. I’m going to be your husband!”

Alex softens at his outrage. Reminding each other they’re going to be married is the new I love you, though that’s still pretty great to hear. He’d marry Michael with his sleep rumpled curls and his old UFO emporium t-shirt, but he gets the need for this to go well from a public perspective. The problem is while he would, Michael looks like he has every intention of actually doing that. So Alex kneads his lower back and regretfully shifts away so he can get up, leaving Michael less than thrilled at this turn of events. 

“Your hair—“

“I’ll telekinetically remove the water,” Michael argues, passing him coffee that Alex takes with a nod of thanks.

“We can’t be late,” he says finally. Michael rolls his eyes, “the faster we get this done the faster we’ll be married.”

Michael considers this as he spins the copper band around his finger. Alex looks to his still glaring soon to be sister in law and then back to his soon to be husband who shoves a hand through his hair and pushes his curls off his forehead. Family, Alex thinks, this is what a family is. His family. Michael stands up and stretches, tugging his stolen shirt and looking at Isobel. 

“Guess we should get going, huh?” He says, dragging a hand through his hair and flashing Alex the kind of grin that makes him want to pull Michael back into bed, “see you later,” he says and steals a kiss from the corner of Alex’s mouth. Alex catches him, pulls him back and kisses him properly. 

“See you soon.”

[lightsandlostbells]

Skam France season 3, episode 8 reaction

Not gonna lie, I kept thinking “they must taste like ham” during the love-making scene

Episode 8

Clip 1 - Morning after 

Lucas wakes up, still with splotches of paint on his body. I guess he washed off some of the paint, but not that well? I have so many questions about how they got home, like did they manage to get into the locker room to take a shower before leaving the school, or did they just go home covered in paint? 

Anyway, Lucas is alone and checks his phone. His father says their mom wants to go to mass with them next week, so there’s your O Helga Natt clip. I’m trying to think about the religious references in this season. They’ve definitely been carrying through with Lucas’ mom being religious; I’m not sure there has been more in the way of religious symbolism? Luke is a Biblical figure but I’m not sure there’s any connecting with Lucas’ character the way Isak was connected to Biblical Isaac through the 21:21 reference. Not that it means O Helga Natt shouldn’t happen at a church, just that I think you could potentially set the scene somewhere else that’s more in line with what symbolism there is in this season (light and dark).

WAIT A FUCKING MINUTE. Was he on the couch???? In the living room??? Wh- why? So they went back to Lucas’ placed and crashed, covered in paint and seemingly naked (since Lucas is shown putting on his boxers), on the sofa in his living room? At the apartment where he has three other roommates coming and going? The FUCK.

Doesn’t Eliott live by himself? I thought someone involved with the show said that. Why did they not go to his place where they can be alone, rather than going to Lucas’ where they have to crash on the fucking couch? Even if Eliott does live with his parents or whoever, presumably he has a bedroom with, you know, a door. 

I guess after you fuck in public at your school when there are people around, cuddling naked together in your living room where your roommates might see is no big deal at all. Get over it, prudes.

This is one of those times when I think Skam France still sticks to the original script too much, like obviously this part is here because Isak woke up alone after Even spent the night and heard Even in the kitchen. Lucas’ living situation (aka living on his goddamn couch) doesn’t really accommodate for that without some weirdness. So they could have revised this scene a bit - either send them to Eliott’s place rather than Lucas’, or have Lucas actually get his bedroom back by now (why is he still on the couch anyway????) or just have them clothed. Or you could have something where Eliott didn’t sleep over, and Lucas wakes up on the couch smiling about the previous day, except then he hears Eliott’s voice in the kitchen. Surprise! Eliott came over early to surprise Lucas with breakfast, and Manon let him in. And it could be shown as a sign of his mania, maybe, like it’s cute but Eliott came over way too early with way too many ingredients and it’s just a little too intense, it feels off.

Anyway, Lucas hears giggling from the kitchen, and of course Eliott is cooking and talking to the roommates. He’s making a fennel and cinnamon omelette. He kisses Lucas and Mika and Manon exchange a proud look. No more interventions are necessary.

Eliott also wants to make blueberry bacon muffins and Manon is all WTF about it, because she is lucky enough to live in a country where people apparently weren’t putting bacon in every single food product for a few years. 

Mika and Manon pretend they didn’t hear anything from Eliott and Lucas when they came in, but Lisa enters and is like, yes, I did hear you fucking. So they were for real fucking on the couch? I’m just imagining like, Manon wanting a glass of water last night but being unable to leave her bedroom, just waiting for the moans to stop.

Lisa tells Manon to give her room to Lucas since he has a sex life and Manon doesn’t. Cold, but accurate, and also, Manon should give her room back since it’s not hers in the first place and Lucas was clearly distraught over it in the last episode. C’mon. At least take turns.

When the roommates are gone, Lucas says he thought Eliott left this morning (or like … one minute ago), like he did with Lucille. We get this conversation with a big gap between them as Lucas talks about Eliott making out with Lucille at Chloé’s party. Eliott closes the gap and takes Lucas’ face in his hands when he says that Lucille knows him well and made him believe they had to get back together, and Lucas wasn’t ready. Eliott was afraid Lucas wouldn’t want anything serious, Lucas says he does, and Eliott says good, because he’s not going anywhere right now. They kiss.

Eliott comes across as rather self-assured here. Even seemed very vulnerable when Isak called him on the situation with Sonja, and his attitude got very weird and harsh. He wasn’t even looking Isak in the eye as he complained about her; he only looked back when he was asking Isak to understand what he meant. Part of the scene felt very, very fragile for both of them. By contrast, while Lucas here seems uncertain, Eliott seems pretty confident. Although he’s telling Lucas about something that made him uncertain at the time, in the moment he seems to have gotten over it. Either that or he’s completely burying his fears, because I don’t see a hint of doubt or defensiveness.

Also, in the original scene, there were hints that Even was manic. I guessed it from my first viewing, watching the scene in unsubtitled Norwegian, just based off Even’s energy and emotional shifts, and then with the subs we could see how he got distracted, his mind was racing a bit. I didn’t really feel like they were signaling Eliott was manic yet, other than the lines about him going to the fridge and wanting to bake everything. Eliott just seems comfortable in what’s happening. (I’m not blaming Maxence for this, I think his acting is pretty solid, honestly.)

They obviously did not do their version of the Gabrielle lip-syncing, and while I don’t mind if they choose not to, for time constraints or not wanting to copy OG or just not feeling it for the characters, I can’t help but feel a bit bereft that I did not see more of Eliott’s awkward EDM dancing.

Clip 2 - Ass = art

I am honest to God laughing that they hyped up that previous mural as the ugliest shit ever, and then Lucas and Eliott literally threw some paint over it and it’s suddenly acceptable. Oh my God. Different strokes for different folks and all, but you can still see the original goddamn mural!!! It’s not even totally covered up!!!

Plot twist: whoever originally painted that mural in like the ‘90s or whatever also did it while having sex against the wall. And the plucky artists who will paint over Lucas and Eliott’s mural in like 2034 will be doing it as part of an orgy. Why even bother having a mattress when you have a paint-splattered wall to hump against?

I think it’d be a pretty display if it it were not half-assed. It’s not even covering all of the existing mural. They should’ve whole-assed it. Much like they whole-assed everything else on Friday.

Lucas is like, sorry we didn’t go with what was planned. Was there a plan? Because it absolutely came across like the boys just showed up to paint whatever image popped into their heads.

OH MY GOD THERE WAS AN ACTUAL ASS PRINT ON THE WALL

AND THEY DON’T EVEN MAKE UP A LIE ABOUT IT

Eliott’s like, Sorry about that! And he and Lucas kiss. Oh my God, this is ridiculous. I’m happy for your love and all but I legit cringed at that part, it’s too much. I guess if I think about it like how Even said it was good the boys left when Even showed up at Isak’s house, it’s the same thing? Except that’s a lot vaguer than like, yep, we left ass prints on the wall, our butt cheeks were used as sponges. I suppose it’s odd that everyone’s just like ... completely un-weirded out by this admission. (🐭🐭🐭)

Daphne is happy because the common room was decorated by a gay couple, so that made it cool, and objectively that’s not a great thing to say but I confess it make me laugh, because what a Daphne thought. Imane is like, why do we let it slide when Daphne says stuff like that? Good question. I guess because Daphne’s enthusiasm is pretty charming if you just tune out her words themselves.

Eliott is like, we gave it body and soul … you sure did give it your body, as Daphne observes.

Imane says she’s happy for Eliott and Daphne asks if Imane and Eliott know each other. They smile at each other. Precious. So we’re getting that storyline in S4, let’s hope they do a decent job with it. It could be improved.

Lucas gets a text from his dad about going to mass. Dad guilts him, telling him to think of his mother. Lucas texts back that he’ll go to mass with his boyfriend. We don’t get an answer immediately from the dad, like with Isak; Lucas just tells him and looks over to his boyfriend smiling and laughing with the girls, like he doesn’t care what his dad says in that moment, he’s just going to enjoy being happy with Eliott. He gives Eliott a back hug, it’s very sweet.

Clip 3 - Boy squad = cheerleaders

Basile is talking about sending a song to a girl, presumably Daphne, because this is hell. She didn’t reply. Dude. Take the fucking hint. 

I know I keep complaining about this a million times per post, but I keep being annoyed at Skam France for adding yet another no-means-yes romance where a girl’s stated disinterest is continually ignored by a guy. We already had Noorhelm/Marles. And Vilde/Magnus, whatever you think of them, didn’t have this crap tainting their courtship. 

The boys run into Eliott who looks happy. Lucas proudly introduces Eliott as his boyfriend, without any insecurity, and the boys erupt in cheers like this is one of those videos where everyone’s watching as a kid is opening his email and learning he got accepted to Harvard (🐭🐭🐭). I mean, it is cute that the boys react so positively! I don’t want to discourage straight boys cheering on their gay friend getting a boyfriend. Go wild, throw some confetti, bake a cake.

Basile says Lucas made the boys bolt on Friday and is upset he didn’t get to paint. I feel like Basile’s “misunderstood genius” left uninterrupted would definitely have resulted in several big-tittied anime girls on that wall. The boys invite Eliott to the park on Wednesday. Eliott agrees to go even though Lucas points out he has class then. I guess maybe that’s a sign of Eliott being manic? Maybe? Like he doesn’t care about school and is being reckless? 

Basile makes an incest joke. Not his first in the season.

The boys really do seem cute running away, I love Arthur’s moves! But again, I am never letting that “it’s not Disneyland” comment go, because everything is so shiny-happy. It’s not just positive in a realistic way, it’s that song that from The Lego Movie. With Isak, he was still shy after he came out to his friends because you know, he was a human being and turning off internalized homophobia wasn’t like flicking a light switch. He got more comfortable over time. And the boys were very excited to meet Even but in a chill, non-OTT way (even Magnus).  

With content like this, I do think it is valuable to show exceedingly positive social support for a gay teenager coming out and getting a boyfriend, like I do feel a little bad having any nitpicks about this. Likewise, I hate to have any reservations about Lucas getting so totally open and affectionate with Eliott so fast, because this is the end goal, obviously, we want to see Lucas happy and thriving and out and proud. You could make the argument that now he knows his friends accept him, he can let go of his insecurities in full (I don’t know how I feel about that because I don’t think Lucas’ problem was solely about whether his friends would accept him, for instance the Pride scene was more about internalized homophobia). And I do think they wanted to make Lucas as happy as possible this week before bringing him down at the end of the episode, for the impact. But combined with stuff like treating his outing as no big deal, and cleaning house last week and putting the Chloé and Imane clips in that episode so we got those conflicts and plot threads out of the way, and then how Lucas is so 100% okay with announcing Eliott as his boyfriend and joking about their sex life and kissing him and embracing him in public, all of this right off the bat ... to me it almost feels like they wanted to skip over the inner conflict, any hesitation or lingering insecurities, and just get straight to the cuddly ship content. And I mean, I approve of cuddly ship content! It just seems a little pat? You can make something idealistic and realistic. I guess Skam resolved some conflicts easily, too, but I felt like Isak’s character development was gradual and earned, whereas Lucas’ lacks some nuance here. 

Lucas gets a phone call and it’s from Lucille. I find it kinda weird we didn’t even hear her voice because that would be Lucas’ POV in this important moment. Eliott talks to Lucille and it doesn’t really seem like… alarming like it did with Even, that rapid change in mood. He just sounds annoyed that she’s calling Lucas and he told her not to. 

Lucas asks why Lucille called, Eliott is like IDK, to bullshit you. Which honestly, seems like a reasonable enough response? I don’t get why Lucas looks at Eliott like Eliott is the one bullshitting him. It’s not nice but Eliott’s ex calling Lucas just to harass him or tell him to stay away is not a thing that’s all that unusual, it happens. Even was a lot harsher in attitude and weirder in what he said (”she doesn’t like people who live free and genuine”). Anyway, then Eliott says Lucille can’t control him (Eliott) anymore and is trying to go through Lucas. Eliott kisses Lucas, plays with his hair (which seems to be their Thing, which is adorable), kisses him again, leaves, comes back for another kiss. He pulls an Even and walks off backwards. Lucas blows him a kiss after he’s gone. Well, that’s the cutest thing I’ve seen from Lucas so far, and very endearing.

Clip 4 - Het drama? In my S3? It’s more likely than you think

Everyone, both boy and girl squads are having a picnic. There’s a cool effect where someone wipes away the time card as they walk through the frame, I don’t remember seeing anything like that before on Skam France or any other remake. Stuff like that is just a fun way to play with the format.

Is that the same lake as the one in the first clip of the season? Would be nice to call back, since Lucas was feeling detached back then, and now he’s surrounded by friends and literally lying in his man’s arms. Speaking of, Lucas and Eliott are a little ways off from everyone else, and like I said, Lucas is being cozy in Eliott’s arms. They talk about doing something this weekend; Eliott mentions that Lisa blacklisted him from the flatshare and I DO NOT BLAME HER after what happened on that couch. Although I guess you could say the other flatmates deserve it after relegating Lucas to the sofa. 

Eliott mentions his parents will be there that weekend. Wait, so I thought he lived alone? Didn’t someone involved with the show say that? Guess I was wrong. Or are his parents just coming to visit? Anyway, obviously this is setup for them getting a hotel room or whatever their version is. 

Okay: absolutely fucking ridiculous that this 4-minute clip features less than a minute actually focused on Lucas’ POV, in Lucas’ season. At the end of the season? Sure, absolutely, we’re wrapping up the season’s storylines and giving everyone some closure and/or setup for the next season. Switching POVs is perfectly fine then. But in the middle of the season??? What’s more - in the middle of episode 8??????? The end of episode 8 is a hugely important turn of the story. It twists everything we know about the Even character on its head, it’s an intense scene, even frightening. It should have us looking back, noticing the signs we didn’t know were there on first viewing. This is one of the worst times they could cut for an interlude about everyone else - let alone for crappy het romance drama.

They could’ve used these three minutes to hint at Eliott’s mania! Or put in some content about Lucas’ parents, especially with Lucas’ mom since he’s going to come out to her soon! You can even keep the picnic with everyone else, just have Eliott doing or saying something that in retrospect is a big-ass pile of foreshadowing. Considering this week has been very light on those hints so far, this would have been a perfect opportunity. At the very least, if you need that mandatory girl squad content, we could have seen all this het romance through Lucas’ eyes, like he’s not even in the scene with these people, really? It’s not like he’s watching or listening to them, he and Eliott are in their own little bubble. So just stay in the bubble with them, or let others into their bubble, or don’t have them in the bubble - they can be cuddling closer to everyone else and interacting with them. 

Keep in mind that there was no French “5 fine frøkner” either, lmao. They cut that out and we got this scene instead. And like I said, I’m totally fine with the kitchen sing-along not being there, but if what we get instead is shit that has nothing to do with Lucas and isn’t even from his POV, to focus on a bunch of (terrible) m/f pairings ... then I’m going to get exasperated.

Basile worms in between Emma and Daphne, like legit shoves Emma to the side. Daphne is reading a book. Basile tries to make small talk, Daphne ignores him (as she well should) and talks to Emma over him. Basile asks her out for coffee, Daphne is like, I’m studying. With a respectful human being, the conversation would end here. It’s appalling to me that even these little moments are chock full of Basile’s entitlement! Daphne says she’s reading, so either a) she is genuinely trying to enjoy her book or get some homework done or b) she just really doesn’t want to talk to Basile or c) both but IN ANY CASE he needs to get the fucking picture, she is not interested in continuing this conversation. I had to vent after I saw this scene because I’m just astonished by how thoroughly awful this relationship has been depicted, like they are hitting ALL the typical entitled dude moments. 

Anyway, welcome to hell. Arthur gives Basile the signal to keep going (and Arthur’s on my shit list, too, for enabling this behavior - like lol, here’s toxic masculinity for you). Basile asks if she heard the song he sent her. Daphne is like … the song with the deeply inappropriate lyrics? So not only is he continuing to bother her when she wants to be left alone, but the song he sent he was overly sexual? GEE WHY WOULD ANYONE THINK THIS IS HARASSMENT.

Arthur and Yann chide Basile for sending such a forward song, Yann told him to be less upfront so Daphne would want him. Yann is on my shit list, too! Stop encouraging this creepy behavior! This is like a textbook study of how guys enforce toxic masculinity, for real, because Arthur and Yann know full well that Daphne has said no a million times, she said no again 10 seconds ago while the boys were right there, and yet that’s not enough for them, either. They’re not telling Basile to back off.

Basile is like, what’s the point, no one wants me, and gets up and walks away. Lol, so this shit is about Basile’s poor feelings. Not Daphne’s, not how she felt when Basile was trying to hump her on the dance floor or never the shutting the fuck up about how he wants her. Basile being sad because he did a creepy thing and it wasn’t well-received. Of course. (I seriously think you could write that moment of him saying no one wants him in a way that’s poignant and sympathetic, but you have to build it up in a way where we can feel sorry for him without caveats. If you wanted me to feel sorry for him, don’t write him as persistently going after a girl who has said she’s not interested!)

Yann and Arthur talk to Daphne and are like, he probably didn’t even read the lyrics! Er, not Daphne’s fucking fault that Basile was lazy. The song was titled “May she love me.” The boys are like, how cute! OF FUCKING COURSE Daphne smiles a little after that as she looks at Basile walking off. The boys encourage Daphne to give him a chance. OF FUCKING COURSE men are telling a woman to give a poor guy a chance after she’s already said no over and over again. 

Did anyone realize this is some Nice Guy nonsense, too? That Basile, he’s really a decent guy! He’s so sweet and nice with his well-intentioned song choice! So why doesn’t Daphne give him a chance, hmm? I mean Basile is such a Nice Guy and yet no one will love him.

I’m sorry I cannot stop talking about this but it is astonishing how much crap they have packed into every goddamn scene of this nonsense. This is a man’s fantasy, this is a woman’s nightmare. Actually, no, - it’s women’s reality, because it happens often enough that men don’t give a shit about our boundaries and our rejections (however firm or polite) that this is a whole subset of feminist discourse, that we have terms like Nice Guy because these attitudes are so prevalent they merit a common phrase, that almost every woman has stories about some dude who wouldn’t take no for an answer.

Manon’s hat

That’s the comment, Manon’s fucking hat

The other girls are messing with Romain about period blood, heh. Manon goes after Emma when Emma walks off. (We get treated to yet more dialogue from Yann and Arthur trying to persuade Daphne to give Basile a chance, siiiiiiigh. Let the girl read her book!) Emma is bummed because Raptor Alex didn’t respond to Emma’s invitation and he’s seeing another girl tonight. Emma also slept with another guy, Manon is impressed by how she can do that. But Emma said it sucked with that other guy and that with Alex the sex was good, it was just that when he opened his mouth that she was turned off. Lmao, Emma, some things just aren’t meant to be that serious? He’s good in bed but he’s not that interesting of a person. It’s fine. Either keep your FWB thing going or find someone you can bang while also having stimulating conversations or whatever.

Emma says Manon and Alex have more to talk about than she and Alex, and that she saw them the other day. Talking about Charles, obviously. Emma lets on that she knows something is wrong with Manon, and she’s waiting for Manon to talk about it. This scene’s a lot like the talk between Yann and Lucas in episode 5, except somehow I don’t think Emma is going to walk away once Manon opens up.

Manon says it’s complicated with Charles and she doesn’t know if he’s coming back. Emma says she’ll wait for Manon to open up. Manon gets teary. Apart from the fact that this is not in Lucas’ POV, and that this is about crappy straight pairings, on its own this is a really nice interaction between the two of them.

But can we talk about how absolutely awful the het pairings on this show are? We have Manon/Charles with their ramped-up alpha male crap in S2 and then what he did to Manon in London, which was despicable. We have Emma/Alex, who are functional as fuckbuddies but have no real intellectual or emotional connection (fine for what it is, but don’t tell me this is supposed to be a real romance). We have Alex/Romain, the bi girl with the boyfriend who’s fetishizing her and asking her for a threesome the minute after she comes out to him, basically. She seems done with him already, like she’s just dating him out of habit now. And we have Basile/Daphne, at the very bottom of the trash heap. I want Imane to have a love interest who’s genuinely great and who deserves her, but seriously, the bar is so low that French Yousef could basically lie on the ground and roll over it.

Clip 5 - Boat bangin’

Eliott leads Lucas to his surprise at the docks. There’s some cute banter with them; they do have nice chemistry when they’re directed well and allowed to be free with each other (when it’s been off I chalk that up to scenes being rushed more than the actors, but it hasn’t been often). Missed opportunity to do something interesting with POV, though? The boat and the dock are shown immediately, but since Eliott is covering Lucas’ eyes, they could replicate the sense of surprise by not showing the boat right away, just have a closeup on Lucas and Eliott until Eliott tells him to look, so we see the reveal when he does.

Eliott shows Lucas that they’re on a boat and Lucas is stunned and happy. He asks how Eliott paid for the boat and Eliott just blows off that question and swoops in for a kiss, and I mean, when a face that pretty is that happy, are you going to question it? Maxence does seem to be doing a nice job with the manic signs here; he’s just a little elevated and giddy, and it could certainly just be excitement to be alone with his new boyfriend, but it also registers as slightly higher than Eliott’s usual range to me. 

Eliott yells about his hot boyfriend to the water and he and Lucas goof around, it’s very cute. Lucas says no one has ever done anything like this for him. Awwww. But also, you understand why he’s letting the question of how Eliott paid for the boat slide. He’s just thrilled to be with him and touched by the grand gesture.

Inside the boat, Eliott pours champagne for him and Lucas. It’s not real champagne, as it turns out. I do like how this scene is shot, I don’t like a lot of Skam France’s directing but this is working for me. The scene on the deck was beautiful like a romantic movie scene, like it’s supposed to feel for Lucas, a combination of light and dark. But now the darkness inside the boat feels a little more stifling, in my opinion. I like that we see them from the side, considering each other. 

Eliott tells Lucas to try to eat some Italian ham, and I do like how Lucas is playacting like they’re living it up and being fancy. It’s a good thing because there is no fucking way on this planet that eating that ham is a sexy move. It is the opposite of sexy.  Eliott snatches ham from Lucas. Even the literal male model cannot make eating ham look sexy. Lucas describes the ham in sensual detail. Lucas says that it’s so good, you’d have thought Eliott cooked it. Eliott laughs and there’s a long look, which gets kind of intense? There’s something lingering in the air. I guess I was wrong, because these two seem immensely aroused by eating ham. Okay. No judgment. Glad you two found each other.

Eliott lights a cigarette, and like smoking kills and all, but objectively way sexier than eating ham. He shotguns with Lucas like Lucas did with Chloé in episode 1, except Eliott is way more skilled at it and obviously this is way sexier/more fulfilling to Lucas. Lucas is ready to fuuuuuuuuck. 

They smile at each other, very fond of each other, in love, and then we cut to the sex scene. To Skam France’s credit: they’re not shy or coy about showing the gay intimacy. The actors seem to be pretty naked. Stuff happens.

I personally don’t find this kind of sex scene terribly sexy, because the mechanics of bodies are less interesting to me than the characters’ emotions during the scene, usually (unless there’s something really unusual or notable going on, lol). The Evak hotel clip happened to be the exact kind of TV/movie sex scene I like: more suggestive than explicit, more focused on their faces and their expressions. With Lucas and Eliott, I give massive props to the actors for going this far with each other, and they’re not shy or uncomfortable, but I also wish we saw more of their expressions so this scene felt like them and not any two bodies going at it? But anyway, again, not a flaw of the scene, just a personal preference.

Anyway, in the afterglow, Lucas looks totally fucked into contentment and says he wants to live his life on the barge. Eliott says he does too and starts talking about renting it for the wedding and getting lots of ham and crisps, ONLY ham and crisps for their wedding. Lucas thinks that sounds like a disappointing wedding menu. Eliott starts eagerly rambling about how their wedding will be so great that everyone will only want ham and crisps at their weddings and caterers will go out of business and somehow Trump is involved because ham isn’t enough of a boner killer, we gotta have Trump mentioned, too. Lucas is kinda amused, with a trace of “huh.”

He talks more about the Ham Cold War and going off on a barge and the sound effect from the Skam hotel clip happens, or at least there’s this low rumbling like it might almost be the motor or mechanics of the boat? Whatever it is, it’s ominous, it signifies this conversation getting less goofy and idealistic, more like reality crashing on Lucas as he realizes something’s off about Eliott.

I like how they shot Eliott in this scene. He’s facing that camera and we’re very close to him, so it adds to the intensity of what he’s saying. The editing is also slightly choppy, some cuts between what Eliott is saying, it’s fractured and disjointed like the thoughts in his head, harder to follow.

Eliott just keeps going with this story, like he’s writing a novel in his head involving Trump and making friends with a drug lord and having to deliver weed via boat globally. Like, the kind of thing that could be just messing around, inventing a funny story, except for intense Eliott is about it. It’s making him crack up, he can’t stop laughing. And he doesn’t notice (or care) that Lucas isn’t really following or participating in this story, Eliott is off on his own adventure.

Lucas is just like … wow. Now confused. Either Eliott is drunk as fuck or there’s something really strange happening.

Eliott lies beside Lucas and asks about the Eliotts and Lucases in parallel universes. Then he says they should die tonight. RECORD SCRATCH. Lucas is taken aback to say the least. Why would Eliott say that? Eliott kisses Lucas on the forehead and says he’s kidding. He snuggles up to Lucas and Lucas is bothered. I mean, yeah, who wouldn’t be after your boyfriend casually suggests a double suicide? This ain’t Romeo + Juliet. (Although honestly, I feel like this might be more in line with Even’s characterization, since he’s the one who thinks “the only way to have something forever is by losing it” which would go along with the idea of dying at one’s peak, and he’s also the one making references to death or suicide throughout S3. Eliott doesn’t really talk about death or suicide, as far as I can remember?)

Clip 6 - Ship sinking

It’s later, Lucas is sleeping. He wakes up and Eliott is sitting by the side of the bed watching him. If you didn’t know the twist, you might think Eliott lured Lucas out to this boat to murder him. And here I thought Lucas was the one with the serial killer vibe. Lucas asks if he ever sleeps. Er, have we gotten a ton of hints that Eliott doesn’t sleep? I mean thinking about it, there was no reason for Eliott to be asleep in the cuddle scene in episode 5, because their make-out was in the middle of the day. Not unusual for him to stay awake. Did he say something in the kitchen scene that implied he hadn’t slept? We also didn’t get any middle of the night texts, as with Even. But Eliott says he can’t sleep with someone this hot in the bed. He sounds deadly somber when he says it, though. Lucas smiles and goes back to sleep.

Cut to later. Somewhat blurry lens because Lucas is drowsy and it represents his hazy state of mind. Eliott is naked and lacing up his sneakers. He says he’s going for a swim. Bare ass. Lucas is about to fall back asleep when he’s like … wait a second. He gets dressed, runs around the boat looking for Eliott and calling his name.

Was there a splash? I didn’t hear one. Better if there wasn’t a splash, but then you have no idea where Eliott is. And for Lucas, hearing that whole thing about “let’s die tonight” is going to make him panic even more.

Lucas is yelling and in tears, he calls Lucille. Axel does a nice job here. There’s the sound of police/ambulance/whatever those sirens are in the background, so did they find Eliott? Or are they just thematic at the moment? (The sirens were in the original Skam scene, too.) Lucas asks Lucille to come. Lucas screams and freaks out, he’s shaking.

Lucille shows up on the boat and Lucas tells her what happened. He;s more angry and upset and spitting than Isak, which makes sense with Lucas’ temper. But he’s also unraveling and in tears. Lucas describes how Eliott said he was going for a swim, and he doesn’t think Eliott jumped, but he was naked. 

Lucille says they have to hope the cops find him. When Lucas says he doesn’t understand, Lucille screams at him that Eliott is bipolar and broke into the barge. Lucas is like … he said he rented it. Lucille is like, for fuck’s sake, how do you think he paid for it? I dont know, is it totally out of the question Eliott has rich parents who give him a sizable allowance? I assumed Even just charged way too fucking much for that hotel suite or that he wiped out his savings or something, and Eliott could’ve done something similar. Though granted, I don’t know how much a weekend in a French barge costs. Anyway, I guess the point is that Lucas was so wrapped up in the fantasy that he didn’t bother to ask for further details, which is true.

Lucille asks if they smoked, pissed a hell. Lucas says just a little. Lucille says it makes Eliott sick and is bad for him. I mean, as I said about the Skam scene -that’s not Lucas’/Isak’s fault, that’s on Eliott/Even to know what he can and can’t do.

The way they lit and framed Lucille in this scene makes her seem kinda villainous, tbh. Or at least more dominant - it appears like she’s literally looking down at Lucas. I mean, she is very tall, heh.

Lucille gets a call, they’ve found Eliott. Lucas questions if they should call his parents, Lucille is like YES they should, obviously, he was naked in the street after he broke into a barge and he was smoking weed. I cannot disagree with Lucille on this.

Lucas wants to go with Lucille, but Lucille says no, Lucas needs to stay away, Eliott doesn’t love him, he can’t love him, it’s just something inside his head. She says Lucas is nothing to Eliott, he’s just a passing craze. What Lucille doesn’t know is that Lucas ain’t no passing phase, Hakuna Matata. Lucas sits down and cries after she leaves. Deeply dramatic piano music plays as he sobs. It gets a little too soap opera-ish here at the end, although I get that it’s a very intense scene; I just think the impact would’ve been just as great if they dialed it to a 10 instead of an 11. But you know, it’s Skam France.

Yeah, they made Lucille way more of an OTT villain here. I have to assume they’ll give her chance to speak for herself and humanize her like with Sonja, but it felt they escalated her less from someone who was just frustrated and concerned to someone who was operating out of spite, especially with the way they structured the scene. Like Sonja had the “he doesn’t love you” part earlier and she wasn’t like spitting at him. Isak was in disbelief, and she just left him like she was fed up. But they saved that “he doesn’t love you” part here for the final insult, the last knife to the ribs, and they made it more intense, too, like YOU’RE NOTHING TO HIM. Okay, Lucille, we get the picture, you can go back to punishing those kids for eating your gingerbread house.

I was pretty worried that this scene was going to be overly dramatic verging on exploitative, considering Skam France’s tendency to go over-the-top. But actually I think this set of clips was fine, other than the very end which was too much for my taste. The acting was strong and there were some solid directing choices. My biggest criticism is that they could have hinted at Eliott’s mania more before this clip, and that there wasn’t so much foreshadowing for this scene, in my opinion. And with Skam it wasn’t just about the clues that Even was bipolar, either, but the buildup of tension that something was off. Things like Eliott’s texts in the middle of the night about random memes managed to feel ominous, because we knew Even wasn’t sleeping. There are some moments that arguably were supposed to be hints about Eliott being manic, but I didn’t feel like they were so different from the rest of the acting/writing/directing/pacing that they really registered. So overall: buildup weak, payoff good on its own.

Social Media/General Comments

Lucas is shown hacking into the sink from the omelette that Eliott made, but I’m not convinced it wasn’t the paint. He posts a picture of the eggs like “If I get food poisoning, you’ll know why” YES BECAUSE YOUR MOUTHS WERE GUZZLING ART SUPPLIES OFF EACH OTHER LAST NIGHT.

Lucas did like all the meaningful posts on Eliott’s secret IG, like sketches of the rain and piano.

Eliott sleeps and Lucas cuddles him while singing a cover of “Call Your Girlfriend.” Sick Skam reference! (Actually I think Skam France's OG homages are really sweet.)

Lots of Eliott and Lucas couple selfies, with cuddly captions like “Him” or comments like “raccoon <3 hedgehog” emojis. Eliott draws another sketch of their fursonas together in all parallel universes.

Skam France also did something where they posted the sketch with pictures of the three Evaks out at the time, (from Norway, Italia, and France) which was seriously very cute and respectful of them. 

Basile is wearing a Game of Thrones T-shirt (”Hodor Hodor Hodor”) in an IG pic and not to judge because I watch Game of Thrones myself, I’m literally wearing socks with the House Targaryen sigil on them right now, but yeah, that sounds about right for his character.

There’s also a dick print on the mural, it seems? For fuck’s sake, how could Eliott and Lucas possibly have any satisfying sex with paint slathered over their junk? Or did they wait until they were finished and just wiped off the paint by plastering their bodies against the mural? Maybe that’s how they cleaned themselves up. But how could you possibly get that good of a penis shape without just like ... dipping your dick into the bucket of paint itself? How could you position your dick and balls against the wall that way to get the imprint? Anyway, Alex and Emma have a bet over whose dick it is. I don’t think it’s anyone’s actual dick, Eliott and/or Lucas just thought it would be funny to paint something that looked like one. 

Lucas brings up the Lucille call in a text to Eliott, saying that maybe Lucille had something to tell him, and that Eliott told her to fuck off. Eliott brings up that it’s something they had in common: Eliott told Lucille to fuck off so he could be with Lucas, Lucas told his friends to fuck off so he could be with Eliott (on Friday in the foyer). Well. Not totally the same, Eliott, but I feel like this is almost a diversion from what Lucas wants to know. Eliott says sometimes you have to tell people to fuck off to live your life. Lucas seems appeased by this answer for now, because he doesn’t push the topic, just says he’s happy Eliott is going with them tomorrow to the park.

I am not French so please feel free to correct me on translation or cultural notes.

If you got this far, thank you for reading!

[theoldestofthettails]

Rick the Great Adventurer (1 and done, my dudes):

Rick and I matched on *ding ding ding* Tinder. Rick didn’t have any face photos on his Tinder, but his bio was pretty intriguing, so I said “fuck it,” and swiped right. (I wish I didn’t remove him on Tinder so I could include some of his bio here, but alas, I act impulsively on occasion – or often). Rick is ~happily~ married, and approximately 36 years old (don’t judge me). Former marine, total beef head, kind of a douchebag, and a total dominant. I was hype AF for us to meet.

             So yeah, let’s talk about this “wife” thing. He was in fact married (wedding ring and all), but his wife and him have an open marriage (her idea). And when he told me it was her idea, I was like “oh, okay, so he must be bad in bed, yadda yadda yadda.” And then he goes on to tell me how she identified as “asexual” before having their child (so clearly they were having SOME sex, just not much), and then after birth, she went batshit with the hormones, and then decided she was poly. Big jump, but no judgment, whatever.

             So Rick and his wife are happily married, but also have boyfriends and girlfriends. Interesting. They even have a list of rules that I will include below – you can skip it, I don’t care (and I’ll never know):

 1.     No secrets, no limits

2.     Home is off-limits, and friends are off-limits without prior permission

3.     Any time spent with someone else is matched with each other

4.     Any time spend with someone else is doubled with [the kid] (my phrasing)

5.     All holidays, including birthdays, will be spent with the family

6.     At no time will either of [them] contact the others partner in any way without permission/presence

7.     Either one of [them] can call it off at any time

8.     Rules may be added/modified at any time if agreed upon

9.     Under no circumstances will either of [them] vent/confide/etc. about any marital stresses to other partners; as far as anyone is concerned [their] marriage is fucking perfect and nothing can come between [them]. Marital stresses should be discussed and resolved in the home, between [them], no exceptions.

10.  Effort will be made to keep it to weekends

11.  Condoms, always.

 So, as you can see, this shit it like legit. And I was all about it. This cool older couple engaging in a perfectly functional poly-relationship. Cool as fuck, right? Well it would be cool. So let’s get into it.

 As I said, Rick didn’t have any photos on his Tinder profile (being married and all that), so first things first, he sends me a photo on Snapchat. And I’m not impressed. Maybe I'm a dick, but I’m just not into his face, which sucks because he sounds like he could be so much fun… But hey, guys tend to look hotter in person, right? So I choke down my repulsion, and talk to him anyways, because … fuck it. So we’re talking all day (note: this is Sunday, after a night of fucking TEQUILA, so I’m an absolute wreck) about his life and his wife and his outside relationships and I'm getting all sorts of excited. This man is a legit erotic masseuse in addition to a security person that gets hired to work at SWINGER EVENTS! Legit, this man lives the coolest fucking life. And I’m all excited – the things he could show me, teach me, do to me… UGH. But the day continues on and I take a 4-hour nap and wake up in drool, hair matted to my head, it’s great. This is what Sunday’s are for. And then he messages me and tells me to take a shower, put on a dress, and meet him at 10pm at X because he’s in my area for the night. OH-FUCKING-KAY Zaddy!

 So I force myself to get up, not throw up, and take a shower. I do my hair, I put on a dress and heels, and I end up looking like a high end hooker, and you know what? Fuck it. I roll with it. I leave my place at 9:45, get there at 9:55, and there he is.

 Initial observations: he hasn’t lost all of his depression weight, his eyes are actually that little in person, and his age shows. He also came from working an event, so he’s in khakis and a black polo, while I’m in a cocktail dress and 5 inch heels. I’M FINE!  

 Also, there are FEW places open this late on a Sunday that serve alcohol (yo, I’m not drinking anyways – my poor liver wanted to die/was already dead). So we end up at some rinky-dink place that has one party of like 15 people and is otherwise empty. Note, this is a low-class joint, so my little outfit made me stand out. Don’t worry, I fucking worked the crowd – sent out little flirty smiles, giggled, played the whole shy/coy yet confident thing to a T. I legit think I like blacked out the experience or something because I had no control over what I was doing lol. It’s like I was a completely different person, a confident, hot person. Whatever though, I ran with it.

 So we find a table (note, he chose the seat against the wall so I didn’t feel trapped – how sweet). We sit down, a waitress (just as hungover as I was) took our order and didn’t judge me for only ordering water and only drinking about a quarter of it (I was just proud I didn’t throw it up). And then we talked. We talked about his service, his wife, his life, his kid, his brain injury and how it’s changed his life. And we obviously talked about me; maybe we talked too much about me. How I cried on a Tinder date (lol), had my heart broken, am killing myself trying to take care of my grandparents, am living a shambly life, trying to find my ex in a new person, etc. Like all of the shit. I don’t know why I keep having these deep talks with random Tinder dudes – it’s a breeding ground for me to get hurt lol.

 But more interestingly, he’s telling me about his work, the swinger parties he attends, relationships he has outside of his marriage, the relationships his wife has, and lots of cool stuff. He told me about what a “vanilla” is at a swinger party (someone who just watches – I’m all about it). He told me never to get into a hotel swimming pool again lol. He also invited me to a Halloween sex party the weekend before Halloween up in PA (tempting). And while all of this talking is going on, I’m dreading the moment when he tries to touch me. He’s definitely sweaty. And he has bad teeth.

 So I can feel the conversation shifting to leaving this bar, and less than anything ever, I don’t want this dude to come back to my house (note: he lives a solid hour away and was in my area for work that night). So we’re heading outside, moseying over to our cars and just chatting. And that’s when things get a little weird. He’s like “what do you want to do?” and I’m just sweating lol. Like I don’t want to outright turn down this dude because I’m still trying to be a nice person (don’t worry, I’m learning that doesn’t work in this dating thing).And I’m pussyfooting around the topic of what’s next, when he’s like “okay, we’re going back to your place and I’ll bring my massage table.”

 BOY! What part of my behavior indicated that’s what I wanted?!

 So I finally, firmly tell him that I’m not comfortable with that. And he’s super receptive, and is asking me what is making me uncomfortable, etc. He’s asking me how I want him to fit in my life, what kind of role I want him to play because he can fill any role I want… And he asks if he can kiss me. I make a compromise – he can kiss me if he walks me to my car (the road was really bad and I was wearing REALLY high heels). He says of course and walks me to my car. I open my door, put the key in the ignition, and turn around – he’s a solid 3-4 feet away from me. I’m like “wtf are you doing?” and he simply wanted to leave me space so I didn’t feel cornered. Seriously just a thoughtful thing. So I take the few steps to close the gap between us, lay my hand on his stomach, and lean in. And honestly … I was expecting to be disgusted. But I wasn’t? I closed my eyes and kept kissing him. And I even had a little stomach flutter!!! But then I opened my eyes. Fuck. And I pull back and tell him to get home safely. He asks me one final time if I want him to go home with me, to which I reply “absolutely the FUCK NOT.”

 He tells me to send him something sexy when I get home, but I jump in my car without another word and I’m out of there.

 Weirdest experience ever. I’ve never been so sexually aroused with the idea of a person, without actually being sexually aroused by that person…

 Anyways, the next day he’s messaging me (I was off from work and laying in bed), and he’s sending me snap videos of him telling me to get on my knees, choke myself and snap it to him…. I’ve never had someone so strongly misread a signal before. And he just keeps fucking sending this videos telling me what to do, calling me bratty for “misbehaving.” Guys, what the actual fuck. So I just stopped replying altogether, and a couple hours later I let him know that I’m not interested in pursuing anything further. I unmatched him on Tinder, but left him as a friend on Snapchat. Who knows, maybe with the right amount of alcohol I might find him attractive? *Shruggg*

 And thus concludes my Rick chronicles (hopefully!).