#i know this will make no sense as a post but holy shit

[boyswanna-be-her]

I had such a funny night i watched a grown man beatbox a cover of iron man to a club full of white people while not knowing a single word to iron man. Literally singing "i... am... i-ron man... nee nur nee nur nee nur nee nur nurr" over the chorus.

This was several (beatboxing) songs AFTER i leaned over to bfr and screamed "i fucking hate this so much" (so as to be heard over the beatboxing)

[secriden]

Oh-- oh I get it now. The scene in Style's bedroom is Style's gift to Fadel: an encounter designed to give Fadel as much of a chance to lay himself as bare as he could (further explanation here) with the layers of deception still between them.

But the garage scene -- this is Fadel's gift to Style.

Fadel presses against Style's lips delicate and soft, peels his shirt off all careful and slow, and nuzzles against the juncture of his neck as he slides into the narrow space between Style's legs. Everything about how Fadel is moving feels tender, because it IS: Style has granted Fadel's request, has let him into Style's space not only physically (in that this is where most of Style's life is) but also emotionally (because Style just revealed some very intimate and vulnerable pieces of his past to Fadel).

But even as this tone remains, the dialogue shifts into cheesy porn territory. Yet the delivery is still very intimate; Fadel is whispering his lines, slow and purposeful, gaze fixed intently on Style to see his reaction. Because this is something Fadel is creating for Style.

It's sex that is fun and playful and a little bit silly, and it's exactly the kind of romp that feels designed for Style. It's laughter and tenderness and comfort and sensuality and maybe kinda risky but oh so very intimate. It's a melding of pleasure and absurd frivolity that feels perfect for who Style is as a character. And it's orchestrated with such flawless precision; like the perfect, most wonderful gift.

Is it any wonder, then, that Style reacts this way?

[radioactive-killjoy]

I’m watching the Final Fifteen and at 40:49 I realize that you CAN actually see Give Me Coffee or Give Me Death through the window (which I’m sure others have pointed out but my understanding of the layout of that street isn’t very good), and then a few seconds later Aziraphale DOES look over at the window. So he knows that’s where the Metatron went and can even possibly see Muriel and the Metatron. In fact, Aziraphale looks to his left (Metatron) six times, plus an additional two when the POV is from behind him.

Then I watched the speech again. Now, I know that Crowley has always been more in tune with Aziraphale than vice versa (“I know what you smell like,” talking about Aziraphale calling for three reasons) but Crowley was not being subtle. He said he wanted to go first AND he says “Really?” when Aziraphale interrupts him. So Aziraphale is choosing to carry on anyway.

I’ve always hated when Aziraphale calls Crowley “the bad guys” because both seasons made it clear that Aziraphale doesn’t really see Crowley as being part of Hell. I thought it was out of character and needlessly cruel. But when Aziraphale says “We can be together…angels” it made me realize that he’s trying to get Crowley to read between the lines. Saying “I need you” was his last resort. Through the rest of his speech, he’s expecting Crowley to pick up on the things he’s not explicitly saying.

Whenever Aziraphale and Crowley have secret codes, Crowley always comes up with them. I’m thinking of “to the world” which is about more than the world. Crowley isn’t picking up on Aziraphale’s pleading because Aziraphale tends to be straightforward with him. Why wouldn’t he take this at face value when Aziraphale is telling him angel or bust?

Aziraphale and Crowley are exposed in the bookshop. This is not a private moment for them. He can’t be honest with Crowley for so many reasons, and this is BEFORE he knows about the real danger. When Crowley doesn’t pick up on what Aziraphale isn’t saying, the only thing Aziraphale can do is push him away. There is no other response he could have given to the kiss if he was under ANY impression that the Metatron was watching.

I don’t know if the Metatron really knows the extent of their relationship, but the moment he brings up Crowley as a sort of ally to Aziraphale, Aziraphale freezes. If Aziraphale showed that he valued Demon!Crowley more than Angel!Crowley, then that would raise suspicions. So he has to play it off like that’s what he would want. He has to say, multiple times, that he wants Crowley back as an angel. Anyone watching the show should know that it’s just not true. It’s Demon!Crowley for him, every time.

[inexpressiblybeautiful]

I remember thinking about what it would be like for oMark and oHelena to meet and ending up with the conclusion that they would be rather bitchy with each other.

But like...

THE HELL IS THIS????????

[goldyluna]

I got inspired by @rosehippiefield's post about Shin's advice on how to deal with Midori and his own behavior towards Sara (that you can find here!). It made me want to analyze more his reasons behind all of his cruel acts. And how some other people from our main cast were affected because of the death game. So.

People can act very differently in different situations. Their emotions and behaviors are always connected to something they go through. No matter if we understand why and how.

So people that are aggressive, cruel, judgmental, rude, miserable, or every other negative adjective usually have a reason for being the way they are. Knowing the reason is really important for understanding others behavior. Of course understanding the reason doesn’t automatically mean we should like this person or forgive them!

Aggression can happen as a natural response to stress, fear, or a sense of losing control. People also react harshly and negatively when they feel like they are mistreated, people don't listen to them, or they are just frustrated. Fear is a really important factor in how we act too.

In Your Turn To Die we have a really specific situation. A few unsuspecting people got kidnapped and put in an unknown place to fight for their lives.

Death itself is a really strong stressor. So adding to it that basically everything is unknown is really not helping with the pressure.

Like was said before, people can behave differently even in similar situations. Really important are the personality, previous experience and predispositions.

Our main cast experiences different things, and because of that, their perspective and way of going through their current situation can be even more different.

Each of them will react differently because of the trauma and reactions of the body to the situation. Some of them even had traumas before landing in the Death Game by Majority.

There, of course, will be feelings connected with experienced trauma (during and afterwards). There are some that we can also see in the game:

Anger

Numbness or difficulty feeling any strong emotions

Lost

Fear or panic

Grief

Worried

Irritation

Confusion

Restless

Hypervigilance

Shock or horror

Shame

People may be affected by trauma in many different ways. There may be problems with looking after yourself, not being able to have a stable job, being distrustful, forgetting things or they can struggle with low self-esteem. People like that can experience flashbacks, panic attacks, dissociation or suicidal thoughts.

After this long introduction, let's take a closer look at some of our characters!

NAO Nao lost someone very dear to her. She even went a little crazy for a moment. But she is so strong mentally she moved past the death, she didn't give up.

A lot can be said about Nao. That she is rational, really smart, selfless and she is not afraid of making sacrifices for a greater goal. That's why it was her that pushed fake Reko down the pit, saving Sara from making the decision.

She doesn't hold a grudge against Shin. She really pays attention to details, so she notices Reko behaves differently. But she still hits Shin because she got scared (Kai's making) and, more importantly, we get the Massacre Ending.

It is not the greater good, this is not selfless. It is selfish and only for her (and Sara), so she can live. Because it is not fair for anyone to be destined to die.

KANNA Kanna was searching for comfort from Sara. She viewed her as someone safe and trustworthy. Someone she can look up to as a big sister.

I am not saying she was replacing Kugie, but at that moment she needed a sisterly figure and Sara suited this role so well. She gave her support and spent time with her. Sara was the one that was there for Kanna and was from the very beginning.

We see Kanna as someone cowardly, shy and innocent. Maybe a little too trusting. The death she experienced at the beginning didn't help and only made the whole experience worse. But she was with people that she trusted and wanted to help. That she was so brave in the second Main Game, making her death a choice. And even if she lived, her demeanor changed. At least a little. She wants to live for those that died for her and it is making her stronger.

Kanna will always be Kanna, but thanks to all the people that support her, she could show her real self. The prettiest flower in the game.

Q-TARO Q-taro is someone who changed his ways. He could escape with the tokens he got (and did), he could leave Gin for dead. But he wants what he thinks is the best. Being alive was the best he could think of at the beginning.

He is an easygoing and friendly giant with high levels of anxiety and selfishness. He has his moments of doubt, like with the tokens.

When we give him enough tokens, he escapes. Even when Rio tells him that, if he inserts all tokens, everyone else will die. Even when he is offered his tokens back. He just apologizes and turns away from Sara.

When we won't do the trade with him, he can't go with his plan. When his doll talks during the coffin roulette, he admits he wanted to abandon them all even if it meant killing someone. And when he talked with Mai after she woke up, he said that he would do the same as her, but he didn't have the opportunity.

He trusted Mai and didn't blame her for the stabbing because he understood. He made the whole plan of saving others by dying himself. Sacrifice from a guy wanting to live hits so hard.

KEIJI The thing with Keiji is complicated. He is a liar, a murderer and a skiver. But he also is so full of guilt and anger. He is still grieving. Years passed, but he still feels guilty about the death of Mr. Policeman.

He is angry, desperate, lost in the dark thoughts. And he acts on them during his First Trial. But Megumi was his friend once, someone really important to him. They drank together, worked together, spent a lot of time together. So he had another's blood on his hands and the whole death game on his head.

He isn't trusting anyone because he knows he himself has something to hide. But he suppresses all the emotions and hides behind humor and fake flirting. He lies about being a policeman because he thinks that would be the way for others to not think he did anything horrible.

He doesn't feel like someone who can do anything about his situation, let alone theirs all. It is easier to give responsibility to another person, even if she is only 17 years old.

He acts how he believes is the best. He acts without telling the person that is supposed to trust him the most his plans. For the best or for the worst.

The death game isn't really a good supplement for therapy.

SARA Sara is very strong-minded, very befitting for a leader. She is our main character, so it is obvious a lot will revolve around her. But even this is too much. There is just so much on her shoulders.

She is only in high school but she almost died a few times (and she did, probably, as we are the players, so the GAME OVER screen isn't strange for us) in a very short time. She got people she can trust and those that hate her and make her life harder. She became a leader for all of them and they look up to her.

"Are you going to be our goddess of victory... or our angel of death?”

A lot of pressure is put on her. She will be the reason everyone will survive or die. Isn't that comforting, Keiji?

But okay, some may say that she is a born leader anyway, but she holds onto Keiji really hard. He is her anchor after Joe. It is also a way to destroy her if she will ever lose him. Because while Sara is she's extremely competent, she makes mistakes. But we know she will always get up.

Sara is also even more interesting, because we know her rate of survival is 15.5% (and the % of our participants is really curious in itself and deserves its own post). We saw a lot of faces of Sara thanks to simulations. She could be merciless, manipulative and ready to do anything to survive. She is obsessed and selfish, not caring for anyone else, just herself.

And we can't blame her, she wants to live. When we are desperate, we do things that aren't good. Those horrible situations, life-threatening ones, make us different people.

Have you ever heard about the Johari Window?

The Johari Window is a quadrant diagram that is used to show how we know ourselves and how others perceive us. It can be a tool to understand ourselves—how we behave, our character traits, skills, attitudes, knowledge and reactions.

Like the name suggests, there are four parts to this model.

Open Part - there are things that are known to you and others. If you know you are shy and you act shy towards other people, all of you know that you are shy. We know Nao is an artist. She knows that and tells others she went to study art. She was completely Open with that.

Hidden Part - is when there are aspects only known to you. You keep them hidden from others so others won't know those things about you. For example, you can be very opinionated, but you don't show it to others. Then they can't know that your opinions may be different than theirs because they can't hear your thoughts.

Blind Spot - it is the complete opposite of the previous part. There are things that others know about you, but you are not aware of them. Kanna is really clever. She figured out the password to Kai's laptop when Shin had a problem with it and she knew that Shin tampered with her sister's message. But she still thinks of herself as not smart (she says that in chapter 2 part 2).

Unknown Part - this one is really interesting, because about this part neither you nor others know about yet. Mostly it stays a secret, but sometimes, where there is a really unpredictable situation that can, for example be life-threatening, that Part may come to light.

We never can know how we will behave during those situations that we never lived through. We don't know if we will fight, flight, freeze, flop or fawn.

Q-taro and Sara are perfect examples of the Unknown Part of the Johari Window.

Q-taro's high level of stress pushed him to do some horrible things. When he had to actively choose if it was him or Gin that would die, he didn't do anything. He let Gin get hit because he was afraid to die, even if the poison would work slower on him. Some shame him for this, but if we were in his place, would we do differently? Click a button that could kill us. We don't know and we hopefully won't.

We may say we would do or not do some things, but until the situation happens to us, we won't be sure.

Similar with Sara and her behavior. All the things she did, all the thoughts, emotions, relationships and ways of doing things we see are a result of some really important factor. She changes after the logic route, why?

Because of Joe. He is her tranquilizer, her anchor, her morality. He was the person that made Sara care during the death game.

Her whole behavior switched only because of one person.

When we pick Kanna to live, Sara is how we know her. Compassionate, strong, mature. But when Shin lives, Joe dies again, but this time in her memories. It makes the situation similar to those in simulations.

Even Sara is terrified by what she is doing.

SHIN (+ Midori)

And that's why Shin is so suspicious of Sara all the time! But let's start at the beginning with him.

Shin is, like every character in YTTD, a very complex character. We know him as an annoying, scary and cruel man for most of the game. Some of us hate him still and some took him as their favorite.

What he did and his reasons aren't forgettable. But it is nice to see a reason behind his behavior.

Midori is sadistic and really cruel. He torments others for his own amusement and loves to watch them break. He loves to make others be afraid of him—and that's why he always tries to be intimidating by holding eye contact and saying unsettling things. He is mean and childish, but he also is really good at reading people. He uses that for his own use, to push the limits of others, control them and let them fall in desperation.

Shin spent a lot of time with Midori. He was his only friend in school and he was so scared of him. Midori did everything to make Shin uncomfortable, but also unable to leave him.

But thanks to that, he knows a lot about him. Shin knows Midori loves control, so taking it away from him is lethal. He knows that Midori is so afraid of death (even if Midori thinks nobody will ever kill him), he is a coward that cares only about himself.

When Shin gives Sara advice, it is so ironic. He tells Sara she should act how he acts towards her. To try to intimidate Midori, make him scared, take away his control.

The advice is important, because only thanks to that can we see how Shin sees Sara and his situation.

Sara is so similar to Midori. Shin can see in her all those cruel acts that never happened. She is in so much control because she is the leader and makes a lot of final decisions. She can be so intimidating. She has sometimes emotional outbursts (that are entirely justified). Additionally, she has a really high % of survival that automatically makes her the most dangerous enemy.

Of course Sara isn't like Midori. Their reasons are different and Sara is genuinely a really good person. But Shin has problems with distinguishing them.

Shin definitely got traumatized during his "friendship time" with Midori. It affected him so much, he is searching for danger in anything remotly similar to what he already knows. His defence mechanism and heuristic try to save him, but it does more harm than good.

He got hurt by someone close to him, so he is extra careful. He doesn't want to be too close to people, prefers to be distant and mean. He prefers to act as someone he hates and is scared of, why?

Because he is afraid. In his own eyes, he is weak and easy to get rid of if he is useless. He thinks the way to survive is to act as the only person that made him feel the worst.

Intimidation, cruelty, cunning, manipulation, lies. Those are the keys to survival in the world where it is kill or be killed. If he is those things, he may live longer than if he were himself.

But as we know, Shin also isn't like Midori. He cares—for Kanna, Gin, even for Keiji and Sara. And he wants them all to escape, despite everything. But going back to old Shin isn't an option anymore. Too much has happened.

Fear is infinitely connected with anger. Anger makes people mean and impulsive. That's why after Kanna's death, he made the worst Joe experience for Sara. That's why he was so mean to Kanna when it turned out that she isn't the Sacrifice and is ready to die for him.

That's why he hates Sara. He is so, so afraid it hurts.

He wants to destroy any possibility that could hurt him and the only way, in his opinion, for that to happen is to hit first. And that's how they should fight with Midori.

Fight fire with fire.

But if anyone knows how extinguishing fire with fire works, then they know that at the end both fire dies and the forest will still be burnt. There will always be victims, no matter if they are main or side characters.

Fire destroys. Midori is so widespread that he can't be stopped by using only water. Sara is a small fire that Shin wants to nip in the bud before it is greater than the forest itself.

But we are heading towards the end slowly. There are fewer and fewer people. Relations will always be strained but also deeper, on another level. Let's see how they will act in the final chapter!

THE END

Finally, I just want to say: there always will be choices to choose, decisions to decide and fires to fight. We can hate, love or like anyone for any reason, but it is important to understand the other person.

Sometimes life is so unpredictable. We won't know what will happen and what we will do. We don't know ourselves as well as we think we do.

But let's be kind to ourselves and others. We don't know what they went through and what will happen to us.

[spinjitsuburst]

holy shit i've spent the past four real life days trying to beat a minigame in stardew valley and i couldn't beat it until today i was doing it and i zoned out while thinking really hard about the logistics of vengestone production and distribution prior to the events of crystalized and i beat it moral of the story zone out and think about a very specific aspect of ninjago you can accomplish anything

[anachronistic-falsehood]

the situation with dream rn is so fucking insane. imagine fucking gumball calls you a faggot in an uber and slaps the shit out of you. and like i'm not defending nicholas' behaviour either but he was very drunk and in the middle of a manic episode. gumball rocked ur shit dude. and on top of that, video/audio proof of dream sexting at least one minor came out so even if you somehow disregard all the past evidence of the stuff that came out with amanda and anastasia then like!! you can't fucking excuse this!!!! and now people are contacting the orange county police department about these new snapchat messages that came out!!! TAKE HIS ASS TO JAIL!!!

[aquaquadrant]

Headcanon time: Dr Atlas' overworld counterpart is the same scientist that created Doc and Stress (also trio trauma bonding, because why not)

Also I can't help but imagine this scenario happening if Tango gets kidnapped and taken back to Hels:

Non Life Hermits: "You're back early."

Life Hermits: "Tango was kidnapped."

Non Life Hermits: "What?"

Life Hermits: *grabs weapons* "Tango was kidnapped."

……. so how’d you feel if your ‘headcanon’ became ‘canon’

[oh-cramity-its-amity]

i love my friends so much. i feel like yesterday i had a lot of shit going on in my head and i woke up to my friend explaining things in a way that put my mind at ease. i dont feel as anxious anymore because i know i was overthinking. i think my dad said it best when he told me that he thought my wonderful brain of mine just wants to think problems are bigger than they actually are. he is right! im just inexperienced in life and half of the time im scared im doing something wrong but- HEY. i need to be more confident in making mistakes. making mistakes doesn't define me as a person!! i need to stop worrying about doing life right and just live for the sake of living and doing what makes me happy!!!!!!!

[always-a-slut-4-ghouls]

I just looked at the price on the back of a book I’ve had for a bit over a decade and it was four. fucking. dollars. Just four with no taxes. No extra 97cents or something before taxes. Just a round number that you would add taxes to.

I googled the price of a new edition and it was almost thirteen! Not an even thirteen, it was like 12.96 or something. Close enough that it’s basically thirteen but if you’re adding multiple items together to try and get the price on a purchase with more items it would add more confusion.

[amitykinz]

commonplacing has taught me more about myself in two days than journaling has taught me in 12 years

[jheselbraum]

Why does Yunobo's sage theme go so fucking hard

[arolesbianism]

Guys why is rain world so good (<- rewatched some scenes and teared up on all of them)

[thethingything]

I can already tell we're gonna get drop within the next couple of hours because we've had a lot of fun today so that's gonna be interesting to deal with because our brain's been doing weird stuff over the last few days, but I do appreciate that both last Monday and today we got to enjoy a big event that was fun enough to do that because wow we needed that.

I also appreciate that so far this month we've done really well with challenging our social anxiety and today we managed to get up and do chores and stuff relatively soon after waking up

[iridescentoracle]

@eglerieth replied to your post: Hello! I am here to ask about your Dior headcanons…

What’s your Galadriel headcanon?

Oh man, I didn’t see this!! Thank you for asking, i fully did not expect anyone to actually get far enough into the Dior post to see that let alone actually want to know. Sorry I’m two days late!

So! What we know about Galadriel in the Silmarillion:

She hated Fëanor but thought being a queen sounded pretty sweet/desired power

She’s named as one of the leaders of the Noldor across the Helcaraxë

Instead of founding her own kingdom (like she’d explicitly originally wanted) or moving in with her brother she got married and stayed in Doriath and learned a lot from Melian

Eventually Melian was like “hey so you should explain the weird ominous evil metaphysical cloud i can see hanging over the Noldor so i can explain about it to my husband bc he should really learn about whatever happened before it blows up in everybody’s faces” and Galadriel was like “yeah he probably should but i’m not telling”

At some point Galadriel asked Finrod why he wasn’t married yet

One time Melian casually foreshadowed Beren’s existence to Galadriel, who has no recorded response

That’s it. That’s literally all we know about what she was up to. She was super jazzed about the prospect of Ruling A Kingdom and then made friends with a queen and learned a bunch from her and… was still alive after the War of Wrath, and in between we have nothing.

We don’t know how she survived the Second Kinslaying, we can assume she made it to the Havens of Sirion but don’t know how she survived the Third Kinslaying let alone what she did/where she went after that… we don’t know what her reaction was to the death of her only remaining family member in Middle-earth, for which her cousins and the great-uncle in whose kingdom she lived were both partially responsible…

Like, that's weird, right? Galadriel is firmly established as someone bold and interested in being a ruler and stubborn as all get out, and then she… does nothing and everybody seems to forget she exists for several hundred years and some major political upheavals that should have personally affected her? It's not just me? That's really weird?

So, my Galadriel headcanon is that she’s inexplicably absent for most of the Quenta Silmarillion because she was deliberately erased/left out by the scribes writing things down because there was no way to acknowledge her presence in Doriath during and after Beren & Lúthien’s whole everything without getting into the messiest bit of Sindar-Noldor political tension that didn’t involve the Fëanorioni, because (again, headcanon) Galadriel Did Not Respond Well to her uncle getting her brother killed as a side effect of trying to get her cousin’s boyfriend killed and there was A Lot Of Tension for a while there (when you’ve got that kind of interpersonal tension between people who are both essentially Political Figures, i figure it’s probably going to turn into political tension unless they’re both trying very very hard to avoid that and potentially even then)

…and then after Thingol’s death a few years later, I think one of the primary contenders for Next Ruler of Doriath was Galadriel “Well I Came Here For A Kingdom In The First Place” Granddaughter-of-Olwë and also her husband is related to Thingol* and Lúthien’s clearly removed herself from contention so if the Sindar want a monarch who’s actually related to the last one they both qualify, it’s perfect and obviously Galadriel should be the next queen of Doriath (it is not obvious to everyone)

* on a side note, Celeborn is mentioned twice in the Quenta Silm: #1, Galadriel stays in Doriath because she’s marrying a “kinsman of Thingol,” while #2, shortly after Thingol’s death, Celeborn is referred to as a “prince of Doriath.” Not actual evidence, but it sure fits in nicely!

Like I said in the Dior post, I don’t think anything ever came to outright surface-level conflict; a civil war in Doriath is not getting left out of the Silmarillion. Tension between Galadriel and Thingol, though? and then between Galadriel and [various other contenders for the throne after Thingol, potentially including Dior himself when he arrived] that had everyone a little nervous? when she didn’t become queen and did (however begrudgingly) accept that Dior was the closest thing to a consensus pick and did survive the next several thousand years only to finally wind up as functional queen of most of the remaining Sindar despite eschewing the actual title? That I can see getting diplomatically left out of the histories, and explaining why she’s completely during the parts of the story where you’d think she’d be most involved.

[fiepige]

Hey I just wanted to let you know that your comments on crying wolf have done SO MUCH for me over the past weeks. Seriously I go back and reread them at least once a day and they're such a delight every time. I oftentimes feel like my writing is subpar and not up to scratch when compared to other authors (terrible habit, I know, but one that's hard to kick) and your comments reassure me that at least I'm doing something right! I've also never attempted anything like crying wolf before - I never really got into writing action or violence but I'm being self-indulgent right now anyway because I figured if I enjoyed reading and watching it then I should have a crack at making some for myself. And as with most things, it takes a while to really get the hang of it (and I'm bad at accepting that I might be bad at something).

This is just a really long-winded way of saying thank you for your comments. Readers like you really encourage and motivate us to keep chugging along <3

(This is candyfloss-esophagus btw. If you hadn't realised by now lol)

Hey thank you so much for sending this message! I'm honestly just sitting here like:

Your writing is amazing and it makes me so happy to hear that my comments mean so much to you! Idk how to explain it but reading your fic just makes me feel so many great emotions!

I've been thinking about chapter 3 all day and I get this great bubbly feeling in my chest whenever I think about it? Idk how to describe it, but it just makes me feel incedibly good whenever I think about it? Does that make sense? Probably not but I don't know how else to articulate it ^^'

(Also that last line hits me so hard every time! I'm stil NOT over it!!!)

Like Idk I haven't read a lot of fics that had such a big impact on me emotionally (in a good way!) so I really want to do what I can to support you in return!

(Seriously I love how you write, your way with words is so creative and it really sets the scenes so well! Like I can just FEEL the tone of the scenes when I read them)