jheselbraum
jheselbraum
I'm goth now but in an uwu kinda way
82K posts
Jasper | He/They | Genderqueer | Biromantic Ace | Art Blog @indylemon | Used to be the-ford-twin | Queer | I like Gravity Falls, Speed Racer, The Legend of Zelda, and D&D
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jheselbraum · 19 hours ago
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jheselbraum · 19 hours ago
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Gotta love how Kal-el is a literal being from other planet who decided to become a symbol of humanity while Bruce Wayne is an actual human being who goes out at night as a fucking cryptid in his hometown
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jheselbraum · 2 days ago
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The fun thing about Queer as an identifier is they cant chop you off or reorganize you into obscurity. Queer is for everyone. You cant cut the T off of a Q.
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jheselbraum · 2 days ago
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a deeply underrated part of the gay taylor swift conspiracy theories is that if they're right and she really has spent over a decade sending subliminal messages based on minute details for people to decode then she's uuuuuh. I mean she's insane. she's jigsaw. she's the riddler. her dad bought her career because if she didn't have music to distract her she would have started building deathtraps.
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jheselbraum · 3 days ago
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WARNING FOR ANYONE WITH AUDITORY EPILEPSY AS OF 8/23/25 - theres a new ad for i think it was "the conjuring" ? that starts with yellow text that reads "test your hearing, best to wear headphones" -
THE FREQUENCY THAT PLAYS SECONDS IN IS A SEIZURE INDUCING PITCH!
please mute the ad or click skip!! in our ad we couldn't click skip in time because it made us sit through the beginning of the pitch.
PLEASE STAY SAFE and avoid this ad's audio if you're seizures or migraines are triggered by high frequency noises!
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jheselbraum · 3 days ago
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whys combat and military gear always got to look so fucking cool when the people wearing them just objectively arent. thats unfair
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jheselbraum · 3 days ago
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I feel like people characterize Ganondorf as some sort of rapist because they think it’s a “natural outcome” for a character like him but I personally think it’s ooc for him. Ganondorf has always revelled in giving his opponents the opportunity to grow strong enough to go toe to toe with him when he has plenty of chances to strike them down beforehand, only because he wants the satisfaction of defeating his opponent at their strongest. In fact, he himself often gains power by overcoming an enemy that is in a more favored position than he is. He’ll play dirty sometimes but for the most part he embodies what a Gerudo warrior is; someone who fights and triumphs with the honor of a warrior, his evil characteristics aside. I feel like rape would be something he considers beneath his status, the weapon of a person who doesn’t have true power and skill.
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jheselbraum · 3 days ago
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love my pumpkin
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scary my pumpkin
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jheselbraum · 3 days ago
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I was walking out of the Walmart today, and a car passed me, and I got this incredibly vivid impression. It wasn't really in words, but if I had to put it into words, the two key points would be
a). I needed to watch that car and
b). That I needed to be careful, because the driver of the car was a massive bitch.
It kind of took me by surprise, because I really had no reason to be beefing with that car, and I also hadn't really had an impression like that since I was religious, which was in my teen years. Right? It'd been a decade since I had a little voice whisper in my ear, and I'd basically written it off as nonsense.
Anyway, I watched the car, because The Spirits or whatever were very insistent that I did. Car drove fine, went into the parking spot, inched forward, and right when it should've just stopped, the driver gunned it for some reason and it ran into the curb and cracked its bumper.
So, the driver got out, and she went to the front of the car to check that yes, she had cracked her bumper, and then she turned to look at me. The parking lot wasn't empty, but we were the only two people standing in that row, and I'd probably been staring at her for tenish seconds now.
She demanded very angrily to know why I hadn't warned her of the curb. And I could have said I didn't know you were about to gun it or is it my job to help every stranger park, or even could you have even heard me, inside your car?
And all of those would have been fine, but I was really, really busy digesting that I had somehow communed with Mormon Jesus again for the first time in fifteen years, and that the communion had mostly been there to let me watch someone park badly (?), so what I responded with was:
"Because it was foretold."
And I can't tell which would be funnier, if she went silent because there's not much to be said to that, or if she went silent because in Utah, she might actually believe me, but we parted ways without more words.
I'm still kind of digesting this myself, actually.
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jheselbraum · 3 days ago
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The kindergarten-ification of society
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jheselbraum · 4 days ago
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Really disappointing that the responses to Lil Nas X having a mental health crisis that actually take it seriously are advocating for him to be forced into treatment. Firstly nothing in the articles I've read even slightly suggests an overdose, I'd wager the cops injured him and this is simply how they're trying to launder it, but also "taking it seriously" doesn't mean we should all agree that he's a crazy person who should be forced onto medication, institutionalised, put on a fucking conservatorship or whatever the fuck else people are saying jfc. It actually would have been far better if the person filming him got him home safely rather than involving the cops, how are we still having this conversation?
Don't call the cops on someone having a mental health crisis
Don't call the cops on someone who's having a drug related health issue
Don't call the cops on racialised and especially Black + Indigenous/Native people
I thought we all knew why the cops should not be anywhere near these kinds of situations by now in the big year of 2025
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jheselbraum · 5 days ago
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What was the point in animal planet airing those incredibly convincing fake documentaries about dragons and mermaids
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jheselbraum · 5 days ago
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one of my favourite things about Scotland is how often normal everyday folks actually blame the right people when things are shit
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jheselbraum · 6 days ago
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haaattee that ✨ is associated with ai. that’s my emoji, not urs. you’re NOT whimsy.
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jheselbraum · 6 days ago
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jheselbraum · 6 days ago
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there's a jewish story about a rich man who goes to his rabbi to ask him about building an orphanage, and the rabbi is like "yeah duh go for it!!" and then later the rich guy comes back and is like "actually I've decided not to... I was just doing it for my own image and not coz I cared about orphans" and the rabbi was like "bitch the orphans don't care why you're building the orphanage!!!" and sometimes I wish I could say that to lefties who haven't unpacked their christian upbringing. sometimes motives don't matter!! who give a fuck why a politician wants to do a good thing? bitch the orphans don't!!
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jheselbraum · 6 days ago
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Honestly, the Uma lane pictured here is atrocious as a piece of public infrastructure. Only a thin line of paint separates Umas from cars. They may be moving at similar speeds, but in a head-on collision, pound-for-pound, m₁v₁+m₂v₂, that Uma is dying. You know, like some sort of bicyclist.
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I mean, c'mon.
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