#i just really dont like them. and i think their relationship is handled badly in season 2

[eosofspades]

it's not about whether they were on romantic terms or a canonical pairing, i'm talking abt what people are happy to ship or not and the fact that people who ignore jayce full on killing viktor are still out here saying that cait hitting vi was some huge act of abuse. also, not even what the post is about.

cait hitting vi in the tunnel is not abuse. this is the people beating the shit out of each other with big weapons show. jinx and vi were both FULLy trying to kill each other and i don't think i've ever seen either of them called abusive to each other on those grounds. just because cait and vi are romantically involved does not make it abuse; it makes it lashing out once in a moment of extreme emotion - which i'm NOT saying is okay, but you do have to take it for what it is. abuse is a repeated pattern of harm, and just slapping such a loaded label onto a single instance & ignoring context is really weird. it IS a physical assault, if you really want to put a term to it, but it's not domestic abuse, specifically. and there really isn't a single main character in the show that hasn't committed a physical assault on a loved one at LEAST once. (like, i don't fully love the "omg what a parallel" posts, but it IS comparable to vi striking powder at the end of season 1 act 3. uncontrollable lashing out in the face of extreme distress.)

anyway, my main point is that the problem here is how this is never ADDRESSED. caitlyn hitting vi is not actually the problem, in and of itself - the problem is that the show never actually RESOLVES their conflict, or holds cait accountable for the things she does this season. the show DOES make a big deal out of vi hitting & leaving powder, and she says multiple times that she shouldn't have left her, and tries to make it clear to jinx that she is sorry and did try to go back for her. likewise, cait's classism & still thinking of vi as lower since she's from the undercity/related to jinx isn't the problem - it makes sense that that's a view she would have at the time - the problem is that the show never resolves this issue. not that the issue EXISTED.

trying to find good critical analysis of caitvi in season 2 is so rough. no i don't give a shit about "cait HIT vi multiple times!!" or "cait went TOO FAR as a commander" like shut up this is the People Hitting Each Other and Going Too Far show. say something about thematic consistency or setup & payoff or narrative weight or GET OUT OF MY HOUSE !!

[nerdflayer]

This is my opinion on why I believe the GA doesn’t see Byler.

Before I begin, I just want to say I’ve been a Byler fan since Season 1. Season 2 cemented my feelings about them. Season 3 crushed my soul. And season 4 at first watch made me feel pessimistic but eventually optimistic. As a gay boy myself I can’t help but see the whole show through Will eyes (he is me) and can’t help but fall in love with Mike. I mean he did so much for Will in the beginning, how could you not love Mike for that.

The relationship between the boys really does take a turn for the worse coming off S2 into S3 because Mikes character kind of does a 180 in terms of Bylers relationship.

Anyway. Talking about S4, we see A LOT of the CA plot line from Wills perspective. And I think this is key to people not seeing Byler. Wills feelings are made very clear. He’s depressed, traumatized, he doesn’t fit in, he is well aware of his homosexuality which brings stress and suffering and the tremendous disappointment that he has in Mikes character, yet he can’t help but love regardless. With that said, Wills POV is bleak, and coming off the back of S3 it’s easier and, I would say necessary, for his character to believe that Mike doesn’t love him. The pain of letting yourself believe they do love you only to be rejected, is very hurtful. And I don’t think that boy can handle more pain so it’s safer for him to deny the hope. Will even says “I’m not going to fall in love.”

Mikes actions also play into this. Will does not see Mikes love for him. He can’t hug him, is dismissive, he argues and blames Will at Rink O Mania, he wrote to El but didn’t seam to call Will, makes the whole trip about El, isn’t attentive to Will at all, and even when Mike apologizes for obsessing over El- every one of their conversations is still about her. Again this is Wills POV. I will say Mike does give him hints and mix messages for romantics feelings but like I said, how is Will suppose to trust? Is Will just reading into the flirting because he wants it so badly? It needs to be direct otherwise Will and the GA won’t see it or believe it.

Obviously there are a lot of hints for Byler, and I believe 100% it will happen. I’m choosing to trust the hope even though Will isn’t able to.

My point is I think Wills painful POV cannot be underestimated even if straight viewers dont like Will you can’t deny how powerful it is. Will literally helped Mike say I love you to El because he doesn’t have hope for himself. I think straight viewers use his hopeless as evidence for why Mike and El will end up together. It’s interesting that you hate Will but Will plays a role in convincing you of Milevens endgame. What they don’t understand, other than all the Byler evidence, is that Will is wrong! Mike does have romantic feelings for him and Mike will get there! Because Mike doesn’t need to find himself he needs to return to the person he’s always been. He showed us who he is and it’s the person he was in S1 & S2 and we see it when he’s with Will!

[ultra-raging-ghost]

Im real nervous main tagging this because ive said my main peace and i dont wanna clog the tag up, but i will say after some context given i have a couple more thoughts?

tw// SA, r//pe mention, etc.

This will be a controversial statement. Me personally, i dont really honestly care? About what he said? It was eight years ago and he hasnt repeated the actions so i dont honestly and truly care what he did eight years ago, he was 19 then hes like 26 now theres honestly and truly a BIG maturity distance between 19 and 26, but also it was. Eight years ago? Thats all i have to say on that?

I Also dont really care for how it was brought to light, from what ive heard from pt speakers the expose was done by someone whos publicly anti towards the Brazilian CCs and ive heard they've dug up some dumb things about pac that werent "hot" enough to get trending i guess and definitely werent condemnable enough to get him cancelled, so it's honestly and truly in my heart something i see as being done in bad faith.

Alongside this, ive seen translation screenshots from one of the "victims" (not sure her stance on being called this so its in quotes) stating she does NOT want to be aligned with these allegations and has changed her username and profile picture because she honestly doesnt wanna be involved and doesnt want it being spread around, this is something else i view as bad faith and if anyone was affected by this then its the best thing to do as they wish, this not only affects the person being called out but also their victim negatively, especially if the victims profile is easily attached to their real life and especially when the victim is a female victim of assault or rape or anything like that, i hate to say it but as an afab person ive seen it firsthand that thats honestly the culture surrounding assault victims, and most people dont want that being brought up or put out in the public. Im a victim myself - people view you differently, it affects platonic and romantic relationships, it affects jobs, you are actively hurting the victim by spreading this if they dont want you to do so and arent prepared for that to be spread around.

From what ive seen, some people are condemning Forever for getting a lawyer - i dont view this as him being automatically guilty. I view this as him getting a lawyer because this person on twitter has been actively harassing not just him but all the brazilian CCs on the QSMP. This is harassment, the case against them will hold up in court and Forever has said he will speak about this more when everything is said and done

Alongside this, i will say im unhappy with Forever specifically for his statement on the situation. It wasnt handled the way we wouldve liked it, but it also wasnt handled via ukelele, it wasnt handled the worst way it could've been. Ive heard pt speakers say it was kind of formal, there was some slang in there but overall i've read the translated statement and to me it sounds more like a legal statement than anything - he mentioned having a lawyer, chances are the lawyer helped him write it. To me it doesnt sound like anything he'd fully say which is why i was so put off by it at first but this makes more sense to me honestly, i dont know if anyone would agree with this.

TL;DR

All in all, i think its a shitty situation but nothing to condemn Forever over. I ask people be thoughtful regarding the girl affected, and dont spread shit around with her name or profile attached to it unless she states otherwise. It was handled badly on Forever's end and blew up WAY too fast on twitter.

I've generally seen people be well behaved on here, ive seen some strong statements but otherwise i like to think we're better than twitter.

This probably wont be my last post on this as we get more on the situation over the next couple days, but this is my main thoughts right now. I'm still choosing to remain neutral, but more mixed than anything.

[qoldenskies]

Omg I just read the entirety of the canary continuity and I love it so much! I was crying so hard by the time I was done with it!

Also, I feel so bad for all the brothers, especially Leo, Raph and Mikey. Not only is their brother hurt, physically and mentally, but they can't even do anything cause it was (unintentionally) their fault. Their relationship has broken, and they can't even fix it, because not only would Donnie think that they are lying about being nice again when they try to help, he can't even see them before having a panic attack, thinking that they are going to hurt him (or worse, kill him).

I can't wait to see what would happen in the future chapters!

hi!!! im so glad you enjoyed!! >:D

honestly ive been rolling around the particular angst with the other three in my head, and i've been excited to dive deeper into them and how they're handling it but i need to get through a particular part of the story before i can properly switch to their povs, but you better bet it'll be happening!!!

its the pain of not being able to show him the kindness and gentleness he deserves after everything that happens to him. despite his fear and initial trepidation, he practically folds into april and splinter when they reach for him, and he panics when he sees them leave, and he uses them as a lifeline when he's scared. already twice now they've talked him down from a spiral of panic and comforted him (although theyve been unable to do it when the others are around, so they always have to make them leave. even when they dont want to!) and it's somewhat established that it's not even normally how donnie responds to trauma. he usually needs a while to sit and process before he can come for comfort, and trying to push him does not work at All, but now more than anything all that he wants and needs is the affection they CANT GIVE HIM because he's utterly terrified of them, even though its ultimately the most important thing for him right now. more than anything donnie wants his brothers to keep him safe, but he thinks they're gone, and he doesn't know when the curse started, or what part of it was how they truly feel and what part of it was the curse speaking; and even if he did, they are a trigger to him and there's nothing he can do about it.

and for raph and mikey in particular, who are so tactile and affectionate (and are just as comforted by affection as the person theyre trying to comfort in most cases) its fucking devastating. with leo with his hidden low self esteem its still awful for him, but he knows what this feels like, he's only acting so different because he can't fall back on his old coping mechanisms; because they're the thing that HURT donnie, because the curse weaponized them, so he's turning to anger (in ME he is intentionally trying to start fights because he wants to be yelled at LOL) and trying to stay productive instead. but raph and mikey generally have always had the impression of themselves that they're Good People (mikey is very confident and he hasn't really been disillusioned at all yet, and raph is someone i see to be very secure in the idea that he's a good person, which can sometimes make taking responsibility/handling guilt difficult for him. although he matures substantially around the time of the movie) so its just. shattering.

mikey never saw himself CAPABLE of doing something this horrible (he's just a kid! sometimes he struggles to see past himself!) and with raph it was a confirmation of his worst insecurity; to some extent he has always seen donnie and mikey as so much more fragile than him (he does canonically understand that donnie is very sensitive/takes rejection super seriously, and he worries about hurting his feelings. ty donnie's gifts for the brains and brawn fuel i use you so liberally), and especially when he was younger he grappled with this fear of hurting them badly on accident (and he probably had in play before), and even with the self-restraint he displayed under the curse, he still caused all this CARNAGE... and there's nothing he can do about it. donnie can't even hear his voice right now without screaming. they both need to comfort in order to feel comforted and that's been ripped away from them, and they're doing so fucking awful. cannot wait to write their povs honestly i have a lot of ideas >:)

[ryuichirou]

Replies

Now about twst! About recent drawings, to be exact~

thestarlightfae asked:

That is just pixels my dear Ryu and Katsu. Do I want to see the full version or will I be forever scarred?

Well I don’t know, do you think you can handle 8 people enjoying their birthdays together? If so, go ahead and take a look~

We really couldn’t come up with any other way to post it, not a single part of the sketch is sfw otherwise lol

Anonymous asked:

They sure are Sucking and Fucking 👍

Sure seem like it! Yes, indeed. Absolutely.

(this is my favourite ask ever)

blackbutlerfandomnerddomain asked:

SLUMBER PARTY ORGY SLUMBER PARTY ORGY

YESSSSS the best kind of slumber party for these boys lol I wonder who initiated this whole thing.

Anonymous asked:

They could switch every few weeks

Would love to suggest polyamory but frankly theyre already fucking up at monogamous relationships so I dont think theyre ready to level up yet

(this is about Deuce not being able to choose between Ace and Jack)

Yeah, they absolutely aren’t ready for something like that lol This is too advanced of a concept for them. Switching every few weeks as well – Ace wouldn’t shut up about just how unfair it is and how this whole idea is clearly rigged against him. Are you just that insecure, Ace??

Anonymous asked:

More Ace x Idia content please! Those two have potential. Your recent one where Idia sucking Ace? Perfection!

Thank you, Anon! We love these two together~ And it’s very ironic that you’re saying it to be honest hehe.

Maybe you’ll get your wish soon!

Anonymous asked:

That picture you drew of Idia just waking up and stretching….

I’ve never wanted to make a man whimper so badly in my life 🥵🥵🥵🥵🥵🥵🥵🥵🥵

You are very kind, Anon… thank you so much <3

Please make him whimper, he is clearly asking for it.

[feelingthedisaster]

Hello hi. I have no idea anything about the fandom you’re in, however I recognize a few names based off of the stuff you reblog. Mainly Aaron and Neil, I believe. So for that ask about characters could you tell me a bit about (either of) them?

hiii <3 <3

okay, so a lot of yapping alert cause im obssesed with those two little guys

aaron

How I feel about this character: i cannot physically stop thinking about him. he invades all my thoughts. he is basically my head roomie at this point. he is such an asshole. i love him. he is not normal and trying so hard to be which its a fact i cannot get over. also, he is the funniest motherfuxker alive and has been way before the bonus chapters, finally some recognition to my boy

All the people I ship romantically with this character: katelyn basically and only. tho i've read kevaaron/katekevaaron fics but i dont really ship them i just think the fics are neat

My non-romantic OTP for this character: hmmmmmmmmmmm. so hard to choose. i think he has a lot of potential with matt for a super cool friendship. i have him and andrew's sibling relationship rotating in my brain 24/6 (saturdays are aaron only) but the neilaaron bestfriendisims are so funny to read idk. AND nicky god. i need to crack open his parent-esque/cousin relationship. its impossible to deffine by normal standars, calling them cousins feels like it isnt enough and parent figure doesnt fit but they are family, and technically blood family but they are actually found family and and and

My unpopular opinion about this character: this opinion has actually becoming less unpopular since nora had to write text of the subtext but he isnt as homophobic as people make him to be. like, he isnt disgusted/feels hatred towards homosexuality he just dislikes neil and doesnt like the oversexualizating comments nicky makes. bc i mean, love nicky, but sometimes they are a little bit much. and yeah, he has internalized homophobia, he has even admitted it but i dont he externalizes it. the thing with neil is dislike towards neil/getting a reaction out to break the bros before hoes deal. (sorry i love calling it the bros before hoes deal its so funny, its their fault)

One thing I wish would happen / had happened with this character in canon: i want to see him break. like for real. super ugly. gimme whump. . gimme failing everything he work for. gimme relapse. gimme all the bad things that could happen and worse. (except the trial going badly, i cant handle that)

neil

How I feel about this character: neil josten neil josten neil josten neil josten neil josten. i cannot describe him. he is such a concept. i devore it like i've never eaten before. he is a bit of nathaniel and a bit of neil and he is both and he is all and he is everything. and he is a lie but its all true. and he doesnt care but he cares very much. he manipulates like he breathes and he crimes like its in his blood but that bad but that has a benefit but no no thats not. god. he sees people, he helps, he is a sweetheart with who he cares/needs but can be the absolute worst if he needs it. like, like, he makes me insane. i cant form coherent thoughts about him

All the people I ship romantically with this character: andrew. and that kinda it. maybe kandreil in a weird queerplatonic way but not romantic with kevin but like yk

My non-romantic OTP for this character: kevin. and jean. and dan. and wymack. and idk, everything and everyone. all his interpersonal relationships are so interesting to me.

My unpopular opinion about this character: i can remember anything right now? maybe like i dont like him and andrew getting married but idk.

One thing I wish would happen / had happened with this character in canon: mental health. shit has to affect him. he will never go to the therapy, its neil cmon, but that doesnt mean that shit doesnt happen and that his mental health is pristine and that there arent other things aside therapy. like, i want to explore more of everything that happened in the books affect him mental health-wise. not like a diagnosis/recovery but more like an exploration of his intricate issues

[a-court-of-moonlight-and-ire]

Okay so, I obviously am not even close to reading acosf but ive been seeing a lot of posts about it and nessian and it made me think about some stuff. Why is it that Nesta seems to trigger Cassian's insecurities in the intense way that she does, but none of the other inner circle member do? Like, his biggest insecurity is his bastardhood but hes fine with Rhysand calling him that when hes introducing him to Feyre because? hes doing it in a friendly way? I guess? Idk, i think if he cant handle Nesta calling him that when shes using it as a synonym for asshole then I dont he should be okay with Rhysand doing it in a 'friendly' way but whatever. Also sidenote about his introduction to Feyre, iirc one of them said some line about how all illyrian bastards are basically brothers but then Rhysand is also their brother in all but blood, so for a brief moment I got these crossed wires where I was like "wait, is Rhysand trying to claim bastardhood when he was not only not born out of wedlock but was born as the result of a bond ordained by god" and I dont think thats the case, I think "cassian and azriel share a kind of brotherhood through their bastardhood" and "rhysand, cassian and azriel are adoptive brothers" are supposed to be wholly seperate statements, although it is pretty weird how that line seems to imply that the former is the main reason that Cassian and Azriel are brothers, as opposed to the fact that they were raised together when they were children. very weird, but that might just be me

But lets get back to Cassian. Another thing he seems to be insecure about is the fact that he's a brute or seen as nothing but a brute, judging by the fact that thats something he brings up in that big monologue after Nesta and Eris' dance, but again, I feel like the rest of the IC lowkey treat him like hes a brute and kinda stupid even if theyre not outright saying it. And like, Im pretty sure Amren has outright said it. Not to mention that whole thing with him taking Mor's virginity which, she wanted to sleep with him because he was the strongest warrior which is technically complimentary, but I feel like it should have a similar impact to the overtly negative brute-insults because its similarly putting a lot of emphasis on his physical strength and kindof dehumanizes him (not to mention the fact that its pretty racist, both in-and out-of-universe). Also, i dont think this was ever explicitly said in the text as the reason for why Mor picked him over Azriel, but doesnt it kinda feel like she picked Cassian because he was 'lower'? Like, obviously their backgrounds are quite similar with both of them being bastards but Azriel was the son of a nobleman while im pretty sure Cassian was from like a poor commoner family, and I could definitely see her picking him just to make sure shes thoroughly 'ruining herself' by having sex with someone she as the lowest of the lowest of the low, yknow? And like, even if thats not why she did it, these fuckers dont communicate and Cassian seems insanely insecure so I feel like he shouldve had the same process as I just had, and it shouldve affected their relationship negatively but thats not the case, Cassian is just like "no thoughts, head empty, pagelong internal monolgue about how beautiful and kind Mor is"

I was gonna write another paragraph about the illyrian racism but this post is getting kinda long and I think you've gotten my point by now: the ic can do whatever they want with things that touch on Cassians insecurites and he will not care and continue sucking up to them with nary even a second thought, but if Nesta even exists in his vicinity, it ticks him off so badly. And why is that? Because...... she has rich person-vibes? i guess? Thats it, its just vibes. And Im not the first person to point this out, but the text is really trying to make nessian seem like this rich lady/poor boy dynamic and like Cassian is punching up because "Nesta is like a queen" and its like, yeah, emphasis on the 'like' there because shes not actually a queen and she doesnt hold any power over this guy!!

[randomly--accessed--memories]

decided to compile all the proto ram stuff into one post because i was trying to get all the proto vox stuff that i didn't include in the master post organized

Val and Vel are horrified when they’re delivered the drone footage of the hotel. Not only is Alastor back and has Vox, but he’s done… something to him. Valentino met Vox after he shed his original form and Vox always did his damndest to make sure neither he nor Velvette ever found out what he used to look like, so when they see Vox, almost (but not quite) unrecognizable in both appearance and behavior, they think Alastor has taken possession of his soul and transformed him into that… thing.

After they have time to cool down, Val realizes that Vox was always weirdly private when talking about his early life in Hell and is able to inhabit different robot bodies/modify his form. Maybe that’s all Alastor did: order him into a new body. It hardly makes it better though. Regardless of whether it’s reversible or not, he and Vel want to do unspeakable things to Alastor for robbing Vox of his last shred of dignity.

Alternately, Vox could revert to his original body after signing his souls away to the other Vees. Everyone panics, thinking he’s dying when his form starts to crumble and change, and are astonished when it stabilizes as a 3 foot tall, pie-eyed cartoon. His powers are still dangerous, but at least he’s easier to handle physically.

-

We know that sinners regenerate but considering Vox's modifications to his body aren't natural, what if his body tries to regenerate to his original form? Like Vel and Val dont question why Vox always repairs or replaces every minor injury instead of just letting his overlord healing handle it. A fight with Alastor goes really badly and Vox has to respawn in his tiny body. This is the first time the other Vees have seen him like this and maybe Alastor did this intentionally because he wanted to the see the old Vox again.

You know, that’d probably be a good way for Proto RAM to happen: Alastor tears Vox’s body apart until it’s in literal pieces and he respawns in his original body, but Vox was so fiercely protective of his “secret” that no one knows how to recreate his modern body except him, and, well, that information was lost alongside most of Vox’s memories.

-

Sudden horrible thought: Alastor watched as Vox slowly began modifying/replacing parts of his body. First it was the hands (at the time, Al thought it was flattering that Vox wanted claws just like his own), then the limbs, and so on. During the torture, Alastor makes sure to remove each augmentation in chronological order. Once he gets rid of all the unnecessary additions that pulled them apart, then everything will be as it should be… right?

-

Vox doesn’t have any memories of The Ordeal

But whenever he recalls this horrible occasion, he can feel something itching in the back of his brain. This was the only time his overlord did anything like that to him… so why does he feel like it happened twice?

-

Thinking about Proto Vox. There’s something weirdly tragic about imagining Vox in the tower, caught up in the hurricane of his trauma and psychosis and trying to externalize it, only to be bodily picked up and carried back to his rooms by Valentino or whoever (not Velvette through, she only has two feet on him). No one dares call his episodes “temper tantrums,” but the comparison is unavoidable given his appearance.

-

mental image of tiny ram!proto!vox dragging someone around his quarters in the tower by the hand, chattering away non-stop. they’re going somewhere. who knows where.

-

I feel like Vox and Val’s relationship post-broadcast would be rather different in a Proto Vox scenario. Vox isn’t so consistently scared of or indifferent to Valentino; most of the time, he’s totally willing to talk to him! Unfortunately, that’s because Val is roughly the same height as Vox’s old boss and being around him tends to throw Vox back to that time in his afterlife.

It’s so hard for Val, watching Vox 100% locked into this ridiculous, cutesy persona because he thinks Val will hurt him if he drops it for even a second. It’s equally hard when Vox is out of control, screaming and cussing him out because he perceives him as one of the people he loathed most in his life– someone Val didn’t even know existed up until this point.

On the days when Vox is stuck in cartoon brain, Val has to weigh his options. Does he want to spend time with this version of Vox, who’s agonizingly different from the one he knew, because something is better than nothing? Or should he avoid that floor of the tower like the plague?

-

Vox thinks his boss is testing him when Val begs/screams at him to just act normal. It wouldn’t be the first time. He sees that cigarette in “her” hand; he’s not about to get burned again for breaking character.

-

Val isn’t sure if Vox’s delusions about him being his old overlord are a blessing or a curse. In vanilla RAM, Vox only lets Val touch him when he’s too out of it to remember to get angry that another man is trying to hold him or be scared of the 10 foot tall moth monster that’s suddenly in his room. In the Proto Vox scenario, those reactions still happen on occasion, but most of the time, when Val initiates physical contact, Vox reacts “well.” He’ll sit/lay in Valentino’s arms without complaint (other than the occasional attempts to get up to do something else) and even reciprocate attempts at physical affection… but Val knows it’s not like how it was before. Behind the loving facade, Vox is seething with resentment for a woman who’s been dead for more than half a century— a woman who he’s convinced is the person holding him at that moment. Val’s used to knowing the person he’s with secretly loathes him, but it feels different with Vox. It actually hurts. Val truly isn’t sure if he prefers the days when Vox is trapped playing the adoring pet, or the ones when he’s openly hostile/fearful/apprehensive in his presence. It all means the same thing in the end: Vox doesn’t love want him anymore.

-

Proto Vox RAM thoughts : Alastor didn’t used to undermine Vox’s personal agency. Back when they were friends, despite the fact he could be a bit unintentionally patronizing, Alastor treated Vox with the same kind of respect that he afforded everyone else. Yes, it was on his on his own, weird terms, but he spoke to Vox like an adult, let him make his own choices, and would hear him out when he made suggestions. It wasn’t an entirely balanced relationship, but given how Vox had spent his previous few years in Hell, Alastor might as well have been declaring them equals— partners.

Things are different at the hotel. Alastor’s memories of his and Vox’s past relationship are cloudy, seen through rose-tinted glasses. Additionally, he feels as though Vox has proven that he can’t be trusted to make his own decisions— the ones he made once they parted ways were so poor, clearly he needs a guiding hand to keep him on the proper path! He condescends to Vox, giving him orders in a way that’s different than Vox remembers. But due to the conditioning, Vox can’t fully process or push back against this change in behavior; Alastor is always right, so obviously there must be a good reason why he’s treating him like this.

Vox is programmed to always recognize Alastor, but… the idea of him looking at Al on a particularly delirious day and seeing his old overlord is one hell of a gut punch. It’d certainly shake Alastor, realizing that, in Vox’s eyes, he’s become the same as the person he hated most in the world, but Vox is unable to properly express or even comprehend it.

-

RAM!Proto Vox who remembers that he once had another body, but has a directive that goes “I was so silly, thinking I needed to change. I’m perfect as I am!” whenever he tries to think about it. He still experiences all the same body dysmorphia, he’s just forced to repress it.

-

Very vague discussion of some stuff from the leaks

In the Proto Vox scenario, back when they were friends, Alastor felt somewhat of a kinship with Vox. Aside from the way Alastor had also struggled to get people to take him seriously in his human life despite his talent, Vox’s relationship with his boss was uncomfortably similar to Alastor’s with his contract holder. Being forced to pretend to adore them, being repeatedly called a pet or a toy… it was all very familiar to him, although he’d rather swallow nails than admit it, even to Vox.

After they reunite in RAM, things get… messy. Alastor is already comfortable abusing and belittling those under his sway in order to make himself feel more in-control of his own situation, but things are especially charged with Vox. He doesn’t go as far as to outright call Vox his pet, but the new, condescending attitude he has with him is very familiar to both of them. Additionally, the way Vox is never permitted to stop openly adoring Alastor, despite how bitterly he used to hate him, is… reminiscent of various things.

Alastor has conflicting feelings about this whole situation. On one hand, the part of him that’s petty, mean, and desperate to assert his own power gets a sense of satisfaction from having such complete control over his former rival, similar to how he enjoys “taking Husk down a peg.” However…. he did once see himself in Vox, and aside from revenge, part of the point of doing all this to him was to get his friend back. For some reason, in this one instance, having all this power over someone didn’t soothe his ego.

-

You know, I think of “All Eyes on Me” by OR3O as more of a canon Vox song, but tbh, it could kinda work for the Other Ending since it is a revenge song.

Also, now I’m thinking about how horrifying the Other Ending would be for Vox in the Proto Vox scenario. Imagine regaining your lucidity after seven/eight years of constant psychosis and realizing your former best friend/crush not only violated your mind, but also permanently altered your body because he didn’t like what you’d done to change it. Fucking nightmarish.

-

A thought: Vox and Niffty’s relationship would probably be even more intimate in the Proto Vox scenario. Not only are they the only people who understand how each other’s minds work, but also the experience of never being treated like adults because of their bodies. Niffty’s probably the only person Vox doesn’t feel like is talking down to him, partially because, well, they’re the same height.

also RIP pentious, now you’ve gotta keep track of Two Of Them

-

Not significantly different since their personalities are more or less the same, but a little bit.

Vox waffles between being Spinel-like and having a MASSIVE chip on his shoulder about people taking him seriously, so that impacts most of his relationships. It can be kind of hard to know how to interact with him on any given day, since it’s equally likely that he’s completely locked into his cartoon persona as it is that he’ll explode at you for using the wrong tone of voice with him. He’ll be whoever Alastor wants him to be in the moment (to the best of his abilities), but for everyone else, it’s a coin toss.

Niffty’s the same as ever personality-wise. The other residents are a bit less indulgent with her since she’s visibly an adult now, but they still mostly take her as she is. Alastor treats her less like a pet and more like a quirky friend, but I feel like it would be a very subtle difference.

-

I had considered that scenario since, so far, I’ve written Vox’s boss with very similar mannerisms to Overlord Niffty, plus she did have a habit of treating people (particularly men) like objects. However, I’m really fond of the friendship I’ve built up for them in RAM, so I’m reluctant to give them an antagonistic past (additionally, it’d raise the question why Vox doesn’t immediately recognize her when they meet at the hotel, even if she looks slightly different, since his memories only cut off post-falling out with Alastor). Maybe it could be a mainverse thing, where everything happens the same as in canon, but Proto Vox and Overlord Niffty are backstory elements. Would explain why Niffty asks “Who are the Vees?,” Vox reacts with shock and then delight when she kills Adam, and that shot of Vox grinning at Niffty frozen in front of the cameras right before the Finale.

-

Random thought: What if Niffty and Vox worked under the same overlord when they were first starting out? Niffty made the silly, oversized outfits Vox’s boss used to have him wear. They weren’t close, but there was an understanding there, both being small, nonthreatening newlydead with big dreams who had to play nice with the big dogs for now. Niffty is absolutely delighted to be reunited with her old not-quite friend/coworker at the hotel. He’s a lot less standoffish than she remembers him for some reason!

-

Niffty when Alastor summons Vox to the hotel: Hey, I know him!! Alastor, preparing for his whole terrible plan to go up in smoke: Niffty: We used to work together!! Hi Vox!!! Alastor, tentacles receding back into his back: Oh, isn’t that an amusing coincidence!

-

She probably knew. Vox would drop the act whenever his boss wasn’t around, and since Niffty could clearly empathize (even if her job wasn’t to be treated like a toy 24/7), he was more open to being honest/commiserating with her. It’s possible that scenario could still happen at the hotel though. Niffty might default to Vox’s old style (heck, Alastor might encourage her to do so since he’s trying to recreate the past) since it’s been so long and she’s not thinking clearly. The idea of her taking his preferences into account and doing her best to help him look and feel like an adult is really sweet though.

-

Had some ideas about Proto Vox and Niffty while driving

Vox and Niffty meet when Vox's boss hires her to make his clothes/costumes. She's not under contract with his overlord (not under contract with anyone, in fact); she's just freelancing, so she only comes by the compound once every few weeks.

The two of them form a tentative bond over the hardships they face due to their demonic forms, and their shared ambitions to eventually rise above their stations.

Vox is hamstrung by being locked into a deal with his boss and only ever being allowed to leave the base in her company. Niffty is just a regular sinner with no real power, but she uses her seamstress job and unassuming appearance to network and collect/trade information.

Vox is privy to tons of information about his overlord's business dealings and private affairs since he's almost always with her. Up until this point, he hadn't been able to make use of that information due to his limited mobility, but now he has Niffty. He shares confidential information with her, and she carries it back outside. She then trades it to others in exchange for favors/assets/information, which she shares with Vox whenever she sees him next.

They're able to keep this arrangement up for a few years. Niffty's starting to accumulate some power, but Vox is still stuck under his boss' thumb. One day, something bad goes down between Vox and his boss, and he confides in Niffty that he needs to get out of this fucking place; he feels like he's gonna snap if he doesn't. Sympathizing with her friend, Niffty decides to take a risk. She spreads a rumor that Vox's boss has done/is planning on doing something to slight the Radio Demon.

Just as she'd hoped, Alastor shows up at Vox's overlord's compound and kills her, broadcasting her screams to the city. Niffty is excited, not only because there's now a power vacuum that she can take advantage of but also because Vox is free. However, he's nowhere to be found. Niffty assumes he split to go strike out on his own and tries not to resent him for not getting in contact with her (and hopes that she didn't accidentally get him killed by sending the Radio Demon after the woman whose company he was always in).

Years pass, and Niffty builds up her business, eventually achieving overlord status. At an event, she happens to cross paths with Alastor... and Vox! She's thrilled to see him again (and that he's not dead). It turns out that Alastor took an interest in him when he went to kill his boss, and Vox has been with him ever since. Things were a bit rocky at first, but after a while, the two of them became friends– actual friends, not a master and servant like Vox and his old boss had been. With Alastor's guidance, Vox has been building up power of his own. He recently discovered that he can modify his body, and has just gotten his first augmentation: a pair of neon blue claws (which look suspiciously similar to Alastor's, but Niffty doesn't mention that). The two of them agree to stay in touch and possibly do business together now that they've got more than just information to offer each other.

Vox and Niffty remain friends, occasionally meeting up for business-related things or just to chat. Vox slowly upgrades more and more parts of his body. Niffty's happy for him that he's finally able to gain some control over the form he hated. She jokes with him that she's jealous; he gets to change his body however he wants, but she's stuck looking this way forever. Do ladybugs go through metamorphosis? However, things are starting to get tense between Vox and Alastor. She can't tell if it's because of the upgrades, Vox's increasing confidence and success, or something else.

Eventually, Vox and Alastor fall out. Niffty is just as shocked as the rest of the city when Vox emerges from their fight not only alive, but having forced Alastor to retreat. Yes, it was a stalemate and Vox came out of it the worse for wear, but it was still something no one else had been able to do before. While she knows the split from Alastor hurt him deeply, Niffty is happy for Vox that he's suddenly in the spotlight, ready to claim the power he always craved in a body that feels right to him.

Alastor has a dilemma now: he wants to make Vox pay for ruining things between them and daring to try to compete with him, but he doesn't want to kill Vox. He's also curious about a certain ability of his that he's aware of but has yet to fully explore. The solution to both problems presents itself in the form of Niffty. While she and Vox truly aren't that close, she's an easy target, and Alastor's been feeling spiteful these past few months.

Vox is shaken by Niffty's "death," but it does nothing to dissuade him from the path he's on– quite the opposite. However, he's horrified when he learns about Alastor's new maid. Seeing Niffty, a clever and driven woman who he'd once commiserated with over their pathetic demonic forms, reduced to a hyper, childish freak is like something out of a nightmare. Vox could hear the message Alastor was trying to send loud and clear: "If I can do this to her, I can do it to you too." The thought of losing everything and truly becoming the fool everyone had once assumed him to be was terrifying, but Vox's pride and hatred of Alastor would not allow him to back down. He took measures to protect himself from his former friend and continued working to build his soon-to-be empire.

When Vox and Niffty reunite at the hotel, neither them are in the right headspace to process what's wrong. However, there's a little twinge of... something deep within them both. Something like sorrow.

-

Vox is a fundamentally selfish person. He’s fully capable of love and can make the right decisions if the circumstances are right, but in this scenario, he makes a selfish (yet understandable) choice that leads to more selfish, less understandable decisions until he finally ends up wrecking his opportunity to have a real second chance with his kids.

If RAM happens, it’s more or less the same as the non-Proto Vox scenario, just with more complicated feelings. Val and Vel keep them around because they’re good for Vox. Vox is deep in his delusions and doesn’t remember the whole fish tank thing. Fineas is bitter, Ondine is struggling.

Things are made especially weird if Vox has reverted back to his old body. Fineas and Ondine finally understand the real reason he avoided coming to get them all those years and that he was telling the truth about being unable to do so… at first. It’s not a good enough reason. They might be able to forgive him somewhat in the Niffty scenario. Not sure about the Rosie scenario. Either way, seeing him in that body, caught up in old memories, is like pulling teeth (it’d also be pretty rough in an AU with Proto Vox and young adult Fineas and Ondine, although a lot more straightforward).

Aside from Valentino and Velvette not letting them go, I’m not sure they’d be able to bring themselves to return to Rosie, knowing she’ll welcome Alastor back with open arms once he returns.

Charlie is, uh. regretting not getting to know more about her residents before now (granted, Vox wouldn’t’ve been able to tell her about this whole mess even if she had asked).

-

Not particularly different from the normal version. She already pities him for the state he’s in, so knowing that Alastor tampered with his body only adds to that.

If you’re talking about the scenario where she used to work with Vox, then yeah, it’d be rough. It’s incredibly painful to see the man she had once considered a friend thrown back in time and into a form he hated. Regardless of how she feels about Vox and the role he played in her downfall, watching him be trapped in memories of the worst time in his “life”… it’s not cathartic, it’s just sad.

At least he knows her on those days, and can talk to her as though they’re still in his boss’ old compound, swapping information and commiserating about their demonic forms. He’s not entirely wrong, even if he’s confused about the location: they are both back to square one, after all. Vox, locked up in a gilded cage, and Niffty, stuck doing menial labor for those above her.

[lover-of-mine]

What is your perspective on the general audience’s thoughts and what they’ll be going into whatever we get in season 8?

I keep thinking about them needing to proceed carefully with however they do the BT break up not just because of the stans but because the general audience has I’m sure zero idea about any of this drama going on. We know that BTs will try to scream homophobia, but I would not be surprised if some well-meaning general audience members might latch onto that thinking in a “huh they revealed that Buck likes guys only for him to immediately break up with the guy he started dating - are they really actually committing to him being queer?” Way. I don’t think the general audience loves Tommy but I also think they just don’t think too hard about Tommy so they’ll only think of it in terms of Buck.

I think some of the main ways they could combat this would be to

A. Establish a queer Eddie arc early, this shows that they’re committed to queer storylines, not homophobic - and also makes it more clear to GA that they’re headed for Buddie

B. Give Buck an actual storyline where he explicitly discusses his bisexuality (bonus if he says the word!) so it’s clear that just because they’re dropping Tommy does not mean they’re dropping Buck’s queer storyline.

Darling, you're thinking like a fan. General audience does not care about representation for the sake of representation. General audience is not overthinking the timeline, or even Tommy's presence as a whole. They will see Tommy and think Buck has been with this guy for a season and since the show has shown pretty much nothing about him, they wouldn't overthink a breakup, bt didn't start in the end of the season, they've been a thing since 7a, no one in ga will be like, oh they immediately broke them up, because they won't perceive time in universe, just how long it's been since they saw their first kiss. And the general audience did pick up on the way that while Buck is dating Tommy, Buck was existing as Eddie's partner. Most people who are in the general audience and would care about the queer aspect of it all badly enough to be upset that particular aspect of Buck's queerness has been removed, did notice the show is setting up Buck and Eddie, or is at least waiting for that payoff to happen. I do agree that a storyline where Buck discusses his bisexuality more explicitly could help counter that, but the people who are gonna say "this is homophobic", "this is baiting", "you dont know how to handle queer arcs" just because Buck isn't actively making out with a guy are not the general audience. 911 is not a show about queer themes, is a show with queer characters, so the expectations about representation of the ga are different than you would expect. What you said does work, have Buck's discuss his identity outside of dating Tommy would help make things clearer, triggering Eddie's queer arc at the same time of the breakup to let people know "oh, we are setting up buddie so that's why this is happening", but simply having Buck and Tommy have an actual conversation on screen about how it's not working would be enough to appease the ga, because the show didn't make the relationship remarkable in any way.

[the-desert-beast]

👑💢🗑️ forrrrr Daphne and/or Evie if u so feel like it :3

>:3c TYY BESTIEE i shall do my bestest

👑 - Person who raised your OC and/or was important during their formative years

Evie's closest relationship back home in elona is with Morven, who taught him all that he knows in magic and gave him plenty of advice and skills to be able to hold her own in any conversation; she often forgets this advice, distracted by sheer curiousity and enjoyment but her mindfulness will come back right before a situation turns sour. usually. Morven treats only Evie with any amount of reverance & genuine affection, rarely if ever being outright cruel to her unlike the other twilight firstborn. Evie shares Morven's adoration for their mother tree, always wanting to have grand tales to share with her on returning home. Morven & Marek will be the first ones to hear (or even experienced it with her!) every time though.

Daph's is a warden captain she trained under, she had a sapling-crush on him initially, before coming to regard him as a father figure. He and his right hand- a fellow sylvari woman- were extremely formative relationships for Daphne. They taught her how to fight and her intial tactics training as well as how to get a hold of her temper- which was erratic at times when she was younger. Her most formative relationship is one she still has to this day; her best friend Lillith. They understood eachother better than anyone else around them. They're soulmates in a very deep intimate way. For them it's mutually platonic, and they would level the very ground they've spent the last 2 decades protecting, to find the other again.

💢 - Person they can't stand

im gonna be real with u this question is the bane of my existence besties i DONT KNOW. fOR ANYONE. i could be funny and say kynwyl for literally no reason, i genuinely cant think of someone for evie i think she's the type to just go "i dont understand you!" and never bring it up again; shes REALLY avoidant and non confrontational she despises thinking too long about stuff she doesnt like or that makes her feel weird/negative emotions, hates unpacking what she cant find a proper answer for immediately about herself; hilarious for an explorer with his innate wanderlust. anyway i genuinely dont know and evie wouldnt tell you, he just puts people he doesnt like out of his mind

Daphne on the other hand has a fucking laundry list of people in the pact who mildly irritated her once. her biggest trait is that well-handled temper & arrogance. her pettiness, her disdain for others "beneath her" but she's been learning how to deal with that on her end and the more healthy ways to deal with it WITH those people without offending anyone or making it worse, for her entire life. Belial Soulshatter is unfit to be commander, they're too aloof, uncaring, revelling in the stories they can tell and how funny "everyone" thinks they are instead of focusing and ending the dragons with every scrap of fabric in their soul. (This is the false image belial shows people, they care deeply but no one will ever know.) part of her disdain for the commander themself is knowing she could do so much better. that might not be true but it's how she feels inside 75% of the time.

🗑️ - "It's complicated"

dunno which direction to run with this one and! dont know if i have an answer at all! JHBNFDUHGUYSD hrm. oh i know- Daphne's relationship with herself is complicated- it has been for ages now. She doesn't understand herself or the hatred that bubbles up, the petty irritation she cant escape the problems she cant help but find in every action or inaction someone takes around her. try as she might, she can't be rid of them completely. she wants to be- so badly craves to be- but it feels impossible. She loves Lilith, so why does she find a way to hate how Lilith says "good morning" some days? why- how, can she find ways to hate her own people's firstborn despite all he's done for her personally? it feels to her some days like it goes beyond "waking up on the wrong side of the bed" should that be so vitriolic? as often as it can be? She feels a lot. Her emotions are strong. She can control them far too well, it's suffocating. To want to scream and fight but to know in your heart who you want to be, to know that actions make you who you are yet be trapped in your own bitter mind so often. Makes you feel like maybe you're lying to yourself and your peers, your superiors. like you dont know which part of you is "real" or "honest."

[filurig]

3. For the ask meme (fatal flaws, if they know they have them) for any character :3 but I’m especially curious about folke’s

OHHHHH

ok folke is a good character for this question bcs on the surface i think it can be hard to see... since hes such a Nice Sad guy and all. idk how exactly to define "fatal flaw" though so im just going to approach it as their biggest/most questionable flaw/characteristic

smth that just ends up causing him a lot of problems with his relationships not just during the story but most strongly after, and smth that is pretty questionable about him in general is his willingness to engage with and grow close to people who may be of questionable character depending on how they treat him. i think he really struggles with being able to grapple with someone he likes/treats him well also treating other people badly. now there is definitely a line of course (which becomes a big Point after the first part of the story) but arvo does say/believe in a lot of Very Questionable Things during their discussions and folke does not treat those things as seriously as one maybe should.

about whether or not he's aware of this - at the beginning he definitely isn't but during pt 2. of pareidolia (as well as post-story) he becomes VERY aware of it and struggles a lot with trying to approach that. at the end of it all im not sure if the decision he ends up making is the most moral one, despite how much more aware he is of this flaw atp, but its kind of the point - ppl dont always handle difficult interpersonal situations perfectly

[artsygirl0315]

Can you please tell me more about the Burnham Family also love your art style!

(I'm glad to!)

This is Mella Burnham and her younger sister, Eleanor Burnham.

Mella was born in a large wealth family. When I say large, I mean, LARGE. Her father's side of the family grew wealthy and have large connections through the Philippines, their home country. Mella had lost her sister and mother due to an incident involving a crash and a drive by shooting. Eleanor was supposed to get her silhouette suit just like Mella yet unfortunately passed away beforehand.

Mella and Eleanor had a very sweet sister relationship in which Mella had been a role model to her youger sister, She learned everything she knew from her mother and wanted to pass down her knowledge to her sister. Their parents are usually busy at times when work comes along so Mella had not mind that she would be in charge of watching over her sister, in fact, she loved those times where they played together and laughed. She would sometimes tag Eleanor along when her and her friends wanted to play outside. She loved her sister dearly, Which was why she had given herself the name 'Melancholy' the day she watched her sister's life fade away in her arms.

This is her mother, --------- Burnham

Mrs. Burnham was a kind and gentle woman, Mella had inherited a lot of her genes. She would teach her daughters about how to cook or bake and teach them how to be independent. She taught them kindness and to be open to others. She was what everything child wished for as a mother, In addition, her side of the family is where Mella inherited her 'silhouette suit' due to Mrs. Burnham's great great grandmother getting the same powers/curse of the silhouette suit just like Grandfather and Father. This was passed down to every maternal generation through the years and Mella just happened to be one of them.

Mrs. Burnham had been driving her daughters from school that day, Until a drive by passed and shot at the car she drove. Mrs. Burnham was caught by surprise so she wasn't at all prepared to use her powers at that moment leaving her daughters injured and in harm. She passed away that day along with her youngest daughter, Mella survived but was badly injured and traumatized by the incident. And till this day, She mourns their passing yet does her best to cope alongside her father.

This is her father, ---------- Burnham.

Mr. Burnham was a wealthy businessman but this is far inferior to his role as a family man. How he loved his daughters with everything his heart could muster, He doted on them and would make time out of the day for them.

His family was sophisticated yet never really cared much about wealth so they dont much ctto like it unless it's business, They grew as a strong independent unit and would teach their young to fight and defend.

Mr. Burnham was hysterical the day of the incident came, He was there when his oldest daughter was in the hospital and kept her company without leaving her side. He went rouge and tried to hunt down the people that took his wife and child away, He managed to do so but he didn't harm them because of what he could think his daughter might say so his family took care of them whilst he stayed with his daughter throughout her recovery.

They both went through therapy and have been copying alongside each other ever since, He became protective of his daughter. Mr. Burnham feared of what may happen to her whenever he wasn't around but she would always assure him that she was capable of handling things on her own. He understood but still kept a good eye in case of what could happen, He still loved his daughter from the bottom of his heart and never stopped doing everything he can for her even if he was tired 24/7.

Edit: Mother is 32 , I made a typo at that part

(Thats all I have for now on the depth of the Burnham Family. All in all, They have a healthy relationship with each other, Only traumatized and scarred but still strong.)

[near-seth-experience]

Personal vents, dont mind me. I'm really going through it, and tbh I just need to lay everything out on the table. I think it kinda helps me process/ look at the full picture.

Lately, I've been feeling like the people I call my friends don't really give a shit about me. Every time I try to vent in one of our discords, I feel like I get brushed off (kind of like that, "Oh no! Anyway..." meme, tbh), and it's been ongoing for a long time, so I've stopped bothering unless something really gets to me. Recently though I've made it known that I'm struggling pretty badly, ive gone radio-silent and have been isolating, and next to no effort has been made to check on me over the course of the past 2 weeks. The closest thing I have gotten in acknowledgment was a gif or two sent in consolation.

On top of that. Only one person remembered my birthday and sent a message (kind of a bummer considering I keep track of all of theirs and have given gifts to them all over the past two years). The amounts of times I check on them and support them is severely disproportionate to their reciprocation, and I'm really beginning to feel like I'd be better off alone.

a friend-of-a-friend who makes me uncomfortable for multiple reasons was brought into a shared space and now it feels I'm being replaced by them.

I've been unemployed for over a year,

I haven't been on antidepressants or my arthritis medication in over a year,

I can't get a full night's sleep, I struggle to stand up/sit down, and it's even been a challenge lately to pull off a shirt or step my second leg into a pair of pants. My mobility is the worst it's ever been.

My psoriasis is completely out of control, both in terms of surface area and levels of inflammation. I'm constantly scratching my patches and breaking skin, making myself bleed. Seriously, it's this bad:

a collections agency is apparently on my ass now trying to get $4k out of me because last year my specialty pharmacy apparently didn't get paid properly for my arthritis medication through their copay assistance program.

I interviewed for a job on 5/1, was told they'd keep me updated two weeks later, and it's been a month since that, so I'm anxious that this job ghosted me, which really sucks because it's something that I could have done confidently and now I feel hopeless since there doesn't really seem like there's anything in my area that I am physically able to do. (I need an office job with next to no experience required, preferably not customer/public-facing)

My left foot has been swollen since March and my rheumatologist has been hoping that getting me back on the arthritis medication would resolve the issue, but the state's shitty Medicaid isn't wanting to cover it, and the medication manufacturer's support program wants to know info about my family's income to determine my eligibility (but I'm 30... they don't need my family's pay-stubs. Fuck that) so I gotta put my foot down and tell my doc that I'm at my wits end and he just needs to try getting me a different medication because at this rate I'm not gonna get any relief til 2025 at the earliest.

I'm stuck living with Trumpy parents who go to a culty church, and I feel as though I can't speak my mind or refuse their expectations while I'm freeloading under their roof and eating their food.

I made a happy pride tweet earlier in the month that talked about how and why I identify certain ways on a Twitter that's under one of my other anonymous handles away from family, and my sister stalked me, found it, and told me as much. (She's the least bigoted which is a silver lining but I don't share those personal details to family for a reason, so it felt like a huge breach or privacy, and i havent tweeted in two weeks because i dont know if i should block her, change the @, or remake the twitter all together. But it's tied to other stuff... so it's as if it's just... contaminated, i guess?)

I turned 30 and I'm still in the "years without relationship = years alive" crowd so this year's birthday was just another big wave of loneliness and feeling pathetic.

[trashsketch]

tropes game

tagged by @hxhhasmysoul thank you!!! I saw this making the rounds on twitter and i'm excited to do it here too

How much do these tropes affect your decision to click on a fic?

-10 -> very dissuaded

0 -> don’t care either way

10 ->  very enticed

nope -> if it’s a hard no and you’d never click on a fic with that tag or or you even have the tag blocked or you’d insta click out of the fic if it wasn’t tagged

__________

Bonus points for explaining the rating and whether it’s conditional… There are no points, you’re not marked on this, don’t worry :3

Add tropes that you think I missed XD

Tag others if you’re nosy like I am :D

Have fun!

__________

Trope List

age gap   -2/10 

ultimately to me it only depends on the ship dynamic itself? I enjoyed the ship in Canis: Dear Hatter, but it's not because of the age gap. I also will get kinda dissuaded if one of them isnt an adult but the other is when they first meet

codependency   9/10

oh boy me and my gf for real. we met through killugon and codependency really is killugon. It can be extremely cathartic to see it in fiction to me

enemies to lovers   8/10

it really depends on who handles it. i dont like how reylo does it, but man, This Is How You Lose the Time War is like a masterclass in how to do it. I rate it more favourably cause I think I enjoy the slight forbidden aspect to it? And I can immediately think of more stories that do this well (in the sense that, "enemies" are more like two rival factions and both sides are like equally grey, and your rival just so happens to be your equal, you hold no grudge besides what your faction has told you to believe)

enemies with benefits   10/10

now THIS has a nice flavour. I love it when it fulfills that meme "you wanna fuck me so bad you look stupid". Bonus points if the benefits begin when A is injured and goes to B's place for shelter (it was great watching this happening in zoolander)

fake dating/relationship   9/10

I've been won over by my friends, i love the awkwardness that comes with fake dating for meeting a mutual need that is essentially kinda stupid (like impressing grandma or to spite your ex)

found family   9/10

it's hxh in a nutshell

friends to lovers   10/10

GOD help me i love this a lot. it's my fave fic trope and it was literally my life experience

friends with benefits   10/10

my god. top tier. I love it so much it's good good mess

hurt/comfort   10/10

the comfort comforts better after the hurt has hurted real good :)

love triangle   5/10

I would love to see different ways of it being handled than anything from old and tired cishet dramas, so any queer spin on it kinda makes me go insane. Also bonus points if everyone can talk through it as sanely as they can while still feeling like their world is crumbling. It can be such good angst. Bonus bonus points if they can all agree on some level of poly

mistaken/hidden identity   10/10

very delicious in like, spy or superhero stories (and also what brought me on board with miraculous ladybug to begin with)

monster fu… relationship   10/10

I feel like most of us monster relationship enjoyers had an awakening after watching a Guillermo del Toro movie. For me it was the Shape of Water, and afterwards a wlw beauty and the beast drawing i did that really won me over. I have a monster AU thingy over on my danganronpa account that I love to bits.

obsession, possessiveness, etc   7/10

can be handled so well or SO BADLY. it helps when any act of possessiveness isn't too serious but is also laced with the real angst, the good shit, the flavour of insecurity. it helps even more if the couple knows how to communicate through this rather than lashing out at each other with passive aggressive arguments, which I hate to see :)

opposites (like grumpy×sunshine, etc)    10/10

LITERALLY KILLUGON. literally all of our preteen angel/devil OC obsession coming back as a popular trope. what's not to love about opposites being together and balancing each other out!

poly   10/10

So a poly ship took over my brain for a good 2 years. I'm in the middle of writing a fic about how three people get together, and even researching by picking up The Ethical Slut (which btw is a great read on how to have healthy relationships in general too, it has so much good advice)

pregnancy   -9/10

It's a personal choice, only because i'm scared of conceiving so i really prefer not to see it in fic. Giving it a -9 cause I do have exceptions in fic (being whether it was recommended to me or whether it's from authors whose work I enjoy)

second chance   5/10

Again it’s really down to the characters and how it’s handled. I enjoyed it in some fics I’ve read long ago, but I won’t go out of my way to find it

sex to feelings   10/10

the one thing i love about friends with benefits is exactly this. the potential for MESS

slowburn   9/10

It can be so so good. A kagehina fic once destroyed me with how slow the burn was but it was so neat to see it growing slowly but surely. I think it can only work if you and the author agree on the eventual endgame ship

soulmates   7/10

it can be a bit tired, but I still personally like reading it! I like any soulmates au with a good spin on it though, like a potential fear behind not liking your destined partner or liking someone else who isnt your soulmate

thanks for letting me ramble LMAO

i’m gonna tag @xyliane @thehuntyhunties @icefeather112 @murderkitten666 @loudpartythumpingmusic (no pressure though!)

[confessions-official]

I have bpd and I've been splitting on my partner for months. I think. Everything they do irritates me. They also have bpd and have lost three friends within just as many months. I feel like I have to support them through this. We agreed that they'd give me space today because I didn't have the emotional bandwith to help with the most recent one (which has occured less than a week after the last) while handling (re: bottling up & burying six feet under) my own related & unrelated issues. Yet they were sending me things again trying to get my attention within the hour.

I've been a total fucking doormat the entire relationship and put so much more into it than they ever have both emotionally and financially. I dont know how long I can keep things up.

I can't ever voice my issues with their behavior because the few times when I did get brought up again and again alongside how terrible they still feel about it months or sometimes YEARS later. I never told them about the time they hurt me so badly it felt like I was getting gutted years ago. I cant imagine the shit they would say about it with the tone of it being such a funny event if i had. (not to mention in all this that I'm just generally bad with talking about how i feel or being vulnerable. even with other loved ones. which my partner is aware of) ((it took me three attempts to even get myself to send this in))

(((Thanks for existing confessions blog I literally have no one/nowhere else to go about this right now. Having a void to shriek into after months of not saying a word about it is really helpful. Please take care of yourself mod dont be like me lol)))

.

[desifemininewoman]

how to deal Manchild, when it's your father. Idk my mom will tired as F, still that man will ask her to plate him food. I hate it. I love his as a father but as a husband bro..... if I speak for mom, she got angry at me .

It sounds like a personal family matter, and I understand it must be hard to navigate. I don’t want to give unsolicited advice, but if you really need it, here’s what I think...

It’s obviously difficult to watch, especially as a woman, but this is ultimately between your parents. As much as it’s painful to hear, it’s their relationship, and you can’t control it. All you can really do is set boundaries for yourself. It’s clear you’ve already tried talking to your mom, but it’s not working, and that’s okay. Sometimes, we can’t change things, no matter how hard we try.

Not to make any comparisions, I’ve been in a similar situation with my own parents. My father doesn’t treat my mom badly, but he also doesn’t discourage her "pleasing" behavior because it benefits him. Growing up, it was frustrating for me to watch my mother dot on my father like he was a child and not a grown man.

Even now, as an independent adult, when I go home, my mother still dotes on me like I’m a little kid. I used to find it frustrating. It felt like it was threatening my sense of independence. Like she refused to see me as anyone else but a child. And that's when I realized, it wasn't about me. It was about her. She knew her children had grown up and made something of themselves. Ofc, she knew. She had married off her elder daughter quite recently. It's just that being a caregiver is all that she knows. That she loves to do. That makes her feel useful. Her doting over my dad and me is because it keeps her busy. Keeps her happy. I don't fully understand it because I see her as a damn intelligent, courageous, bold woman who can do whatever she wants. But, you know what? I can respect it. I can respect the life she chose for herself. The life she says makes her happy.

But it was a long journey to acceptance for me too, ngl.

Your mothers reasons to put up with your dads behaviour can be similar to mine. Or maybe not. But, I think that's the starting point. Take a step back. Take off that heavy label of them being your 'mom' and 'dad'. And look at them as normal human beings. Try to understand where they are coming from without the judgement and logic. Try to understand why your mother accepts that behaviour. Most importantly, why does your father behave this way in the first place? Get to know your parents life. It might not be a perfectly valid reasonging, but understanding their mindset- why they think it's okay- can someties shift hoe we view their actions.

You might not end up understanding their reasons, but the knowing would bring you a step closer to peace. It would atleast make you understand your parents. Maybe, growing up your mother was the only kid left in the house to take care of her very old parents. Maybe, growing up your father saw his mother do all these housely duties for his father without getting a thankyou in return and now he thinks it's a norm which is why he doesn't appreciate it. I am just putting a hypothetical out there. Maybe, it's not rooted in their childhood at all. Maybe, its a behaviour they picked up recently. It's up to you to know it.

Now that you understand them a bit more, you might be able to handle this situation more tactfully. Try to subtly change your dads habits or your moms behaviour. Honestly, with our Indian parents it 's very unlikely they would change, but it's worth a try. Sadly, you can't help someone if they dont want to be helped.

Secondly, make the change your own self. Help your mom out more often. If you don't want to be treated the same way your mother is treated by your dad, make those boundaries. My dad might be a 'manchild' with my mom, but he knows he can't get me to lift a single finger that easily. He simply knows he can't get away with treating me the way he treats my maa.

And for you, I think the most important thing is to work on yourself and keep growing. It’s painful to realize that you can’t change everything around you, and there’s a sense of grief in that realization. But ultimately, you can make changes for your future. I promised myself that I wouldn’t carry forward the patterns I didn’t like from my family. You can do the same. Your family might not change, but you can be the one to break the cycle for the next generation.