#i have... not been on tumblr pretty much at all recently. i probably will continue to barely be on tumblr...

[axlestuck]

Long time no sprites! Here's a resprite I did of my fantroll Daetus, the original sprite (right) is from over a year ago!

[cherubofthenight]

It really is that damn phone (a rant)

(written nov 18th, 2024)

I was in my bed-rotting, depressed, don’t know what to do with my life nor do I care era up until this morning. And I’m starting to think it’s the people around me bc as soon as I’m not at work, I’m suddenly the most productive person ever.

I’ve been on a mission to become that dream version of myself (which for me requires some physical effort on my part) and shifting and I realized- wait the diff between the dream ver of myself and my dr self only have like slight physical differences. But overall, same mindset, same boundaries, standards & morals. Same person on the inside.

So I thought why make a big deal out of this stuff? Why make a big deal out of being in your dr physically. Stay with me now. Like I try to think of things to do and how to behave and react to stay aligned with my desired self which.. I think I try too hard and it ultimately burns me out. So then I have no discipline to continue- just little sparks of motivation every once in a while.

I’ve realized I feel most at peace when I let things flow without trying too hard. Like when I journal or have inner monologues, sometimes I think—why not shift my awareness to my DR? And suddenly, it feels so natural. Lately, I’ve been focusing on just moving my awareness there instead of worrying about proof or the physical. It’s really just about letting myself tune in, no overthinking needed. Of course, this can still be tricky sometimes (I get sidetracked a lot), but that’s exactly why I started this blog—to explore and share the process as I go.

Anyways, back to the title. It’s that damn phone. THIS IS WHY I SAY GET HOBBIES. I came off Tumblr—I’m not on it as much as I used to be. I queue up my posts when I find something I want to share, then I just focus on me. That’s why I love meditation. Because meditation can be anything. What I just said about inner monologues? You don’t even have to call that meditation—I don’t, most of the time. It’s just about shifting your awareness, and that can happen in a moment. No need for a long process. Just a shift in focus, and suddenly, you’re right where you want to be. I only recently started to grasp that actually.

My last shifting attempt. I’m gonna put the video for what I did and I felt soo close to my dr (the one I had back then) and like it just in reach of my fingertips until it wasn’t. I panicked I freaked out, I lost all hope and inspiration and I had no discipline because I thought “oh shit what do I gotta do now? Do I have to do something now? How do I do this more? How do I get this feeling more? Like what.. what to do… um shit..” and I never got close to that dr ever again. And I hate methods so.. imagine how shocked I felt.

Shaysplanett on TikTok (@shaysplanet)

And then I never tried again, yk why? We get comfortable, we get distracted by the 3D and suddenly we’re forgetting we have desires and we wanna shift to different places

I used to hate reblogging a lot of LOA posts at a time because this community is just things we already know repeated over and over and over again. I also thought to myself.. hm.. what could I post (loa-related) on this blog? And I couldn’t come up with shit. Because it’s nothing new. Law of assumption is nothing new. It’s just recycled shit over and over put in different, pretty words so more people would understand it properly but I think we understand and we’re just not applying. But yet here I am making this post: saying what we know already (and I probably will keep doing that bc it’s how I remind myself)

yeah.

All of this to say what we’ve all heard a million times before: you don’t wanna be thinking too hard about your desire and then end up being consumed by negative thoughts of not having your desire. The more time you spend scrolling and reading about loa and shifting, the most pressure you put on yourself and you miss the one thing you have to do: change your assumption/move your awareness. If you come to the point that you’re spiraling, STOP. Take a breath. Remind yourself that everything is going to be great. Do something else.

(posting this bc i plan to actually take a break from tumblr and finally listen to myself. if you see posts, its bc they're queued. hopefully i actually take the break this time. ps i think im starting to move away from looking at shifting solely from a loa standpoint)

[0sbrain]

here's a list of mozilla add-ons for all of you tumblrinas out there to have a better internet experience

also, if you like my post, please reblog it. Tumblr hates links but i had to put them so you adhd bitches actually download them <3 i know because i am also adhd bitches

BASIC STUFF:

AdGuard AdBlocker / uBlock Origin : adguard is a basic adblock and with origin you can also block any other element you want. for example i got rid of the shop menu on tumblr

Privacy Badger : this add on will block trackers. if an element contains a tracker it will give you the option to use it or not

Shinigami Eyes: this will highlight transphobic and trans friendly users and sites using different colors by using a moderated database. perfect to avoid terfs on any social media. i will explain how to use this and other add-ons on android as well under the read more cut

THINGS YOU TUMBLINAS WANT:

Xkit: the best tumblr related add on. with many customizable options, xkit not only enhances your experience from a visual standpoint, but provides some much needed accessibility tools

bonus: if you are into tf2 and wanna be a cool cat, you can also get the old version to add cool reblog icons

AO3 enhancer: some basic enhancements including reading time and the ability to block authors and tags

YOUTUBE

Return of the YouTube Dislike : pretty self explanatory

Youtube non-stop: gets rid of the annoying "Video paused. Continue watching?" popup when you have a video in the background

SponsorBlock: gives you options to skip either automatically or manually sponsors, videoclip non music sectors and discloses other type of sponsorships/paid partnerships

Enhancer for YouTube: adds some useful options such as custom play speed, let's you play videos in a window and most important of all, it allows you to make the youtube interface as ugly as your heart desires. I can't show a full image of what it looks like because i've been told its eye strainy and i want this post to be accessible but look at this <3

PocketTube: allows you to organize your subscriptions into groups

YouTube Comment Search: what it says

FINDING STUFF

WayBack Machine: you probably know about this site and definitely should get the add on. this allows you to save pages and access older versions with the click of a button. while you can search wayback using web archives, please get this one as well as it allows you to easily save pages and contribute to the archive.

Web Archives: it allows you to search through multiple archives and search engines including WayBack Machine, Google, Yandex and more.

Search by Image: allows you to reverse image search using multiple search engines (in my experience yandex tends to yield the best results)

Image Search Options: similar to the last one

this next section is pretty niche but... STEAM AND STEAM TRADING

SteamDB: adds some interesting and useful statistics

Augmented Steam: useful info specially for browsing and buying games

TF2 Trade Helper: an absolute godsend, lets you add items in bundles, keeps track of your keys and metal and your recent trades, displays links to the backpack tf page next to users profiles and more. look it tells me how much moneys i have and adds metal to trades without clicking one by one oh may god

IN CONCLUSION: oooooh you want to change to firefox so badly, you want to delete chrome and all the chrome clones that are actually just spyware and use firefox

HOW TO USE MOZILLA ADD-ONS ON YOUR PHONE

if you already use firefox on android, you'll know there are certain add-ons compatible with the app, some of them even being made just for the mobile version such as Video Background Play FIx. while most of them are pretty useful, some more specific ones aren't available on this version of the browser, but there's a way of getting some of them to work

you need to download the firefox nightly app, which is basically the same as the regular firefox browser but with the ability of activating developer mode. you can find how to do that here. once you've enabled it, you need to create a collection with all the add ons you want. i wouldn't recommend adding extensions if the creators haven't talked about phone compatibility, but XKit and Shinigami Eyes should work

also, don't tell the government this secret skater move, but you can try using both the regular firefox browser and nightly so you can have youtube videos in a floating box while you browse social media.

see? i can block this terf while Rick Rolling the people following this tutorial. isn't that tubular?

[redr0sewrites]

some of my fav fic writers !

🥀 hi everyone!!!! i wanted to make something to show appreciation to some of my fav fic writers on here, bc as a writer myself, ive been noticing a tremendous amount of negativity and lack of interaction on fics recently. i'll probably update this list as i continue writing and existing here on Tumblr, and i'll attach it to my pinned post so people can view it whenever. its so disheartening and sad that fics aren't getting as many reblogs and interactions as they used to, and i just wanted to say that im so so proud of all of u and ur all wonderful writers!! i hope this list makes u happy, and i also hope this encourages some of my own followers to go check these people out!!

@bigfatbimbo - aaaa where do i even begin!!!! Ellie, your def one of my fav mutuals, and everything you write is always amazing!!! i love your recent gravity falls fics, along with your old hazbin fics and everything else you've written. i love the vocabulary you use in your fics, your writing style in general is actually amazing. you always make the reader so relatable, and your one of my fav dom!reader blogs!! i absolutely adore interacting with you on here, and im so so happy we became mutuals. your also incredibly funny, and your upbeat attitude always makes me happy!

@peachdues - you are so lovely and sweet!!! your genuinely so mature, and its so refreshing seeing your posts on my dash. you always have great takes, and your fics are fantastic. i love seeing all of your sneak peeks and intros to fics, and i love how much effort you put into everything you write. genuinely, you are so talented, and ive been reading ur fics since the first chapter of Into The Netherwood. your Sanemi fics in general are fantastic, and you are so talented!!

@flametrashira - FLAMEY!!!! you are another one of my favorite mutuals, and i love how much you love writing. you always seem so upbeat talking about your favorite characters, and it makes me smile whenever i see you talking about your favs on my dash. your fics and headcanons are fantastic, and i love pretty much everything you've written in all of your fandoms. seriously, you're actually so funny and sweet and you're writing is phenomenal. your always so kind and encouraging, and i love how polite and respectful you are on here.

@sniigura - AAAAA!!!! YOU ARE SO COOL!!!!! genuinely, i love seeing your fics. i am constantly thinking about collage au adam, and i love seeing your adam headcanons on my dash. never stop being you!!! seriously, i am still thinking about those siren!reader x marine biologist! adam hcs from WEEEKS ago. your writing is literally addictive, and you turned me into an even bigger adam fan then i already was. your literally so funny and i love everything you write. i love the internal monologue you include for the reader, and i genuinely relate to your reader sm! i love how much effort you put into characterization and writing as a whole, and im constantly looking forward to seeing you on my dash

@mostly-imagines - you are sooooo talented!!! everything you post has me giggling, you were one of the first Jason Todd fic writers i followed and i adore every single one of your fics. your so talented, and your fics manage to invoke so many emotions and visualizations for me. i love how descriptive your writing is, your writing style is so unique and so beautiful. i consistently find myself rereading your fics because they are some of the best i've ever read. your angst is heart wrenching, your smut is delicious, and your fluff is adorable!!! seriously never stop, your writing is amazing and you deserve the wrold!!!

@vampcubus - ive been following you for sooo long, and literally everything you write is fantastic. genuinely, you produce banger after banger and i love your writing style so much. your smut is actually so good, and its so rare to find a dom!reader blog on here. i literally devour every single one of your posts, and i love reading your fics and headcanons!!! you genuinely seem so cool, and your blog theme is AMAZINGG. i love how much effort you put into the visuals of your fics, and overall, you just seem so talented and creative.

@purple-obsidian - oh my goodness, you're literally so cool. i love your Jason Todd fics an unhealthy amount, i've been OBSESSED with Say it Back foreverrrrrr. you're actually so talented, and your writing is so descriptive it makes me go crazy!!!! i adore the way you write smut too, theres so much feeling behind it and i relate to your reader so much. you were one of the first DC writers i followed, and i love everything you write. genuinely, you are so talented. i reread all of your Arkham knight fics a lot, and i seriously admire you

@killakalx - you're literally soo talented it makes me go CRAZZYYYY- i love your fics and headcanons so much i start tweaking whenever you post something new. your dick grayson fics are fantastic, bsf!dick is literally always on my mind- same with your pheremone oil fic w jason todd, like i genuinely think about that 3-4 times per day like seriously reading it changed my brain chemistry. your writing style is soooo good, and i love everything you post. you seem so funny and chill, and i just love your blog so much!!! you are an inspiration, and i love seeing you on my dash !!!

@sanguineterrain - your fics have me DROOLING like actually you write so good- i love your interpretation of virgin!Jason and everything you write has me SCREAMINGGG. i love seeing you on my dash, and i swear every one of your Jason posts make my day. your so relatable and cool, and i scroll through your blog on the daily. everything you post is so entertaining, and i love your writing style in general!!!!

@hoodzgyal - everything you write is PHENOMENAL im not even kidding. from virgin!jason to college!dick, i adore everything you write. seeing you appear on my dash is like a holiday, and i literally adore your smut. your so talented, and your mommy kink!jason hcs actually make me go CRAZZYYY i think about them constantly!!! you have such a chill and sweet demeanor on your blog, and it's really uplifting to see on my dash. i love everything you post, and i also LOVE your theme!!! the red is genuinely so pretty and it's one of my favs. all in all, you seem soo cool, and your fics are amazing!!!!

@jasontoddproblems - i am like platonically in love with you and everything you write. your Longest Night series is actually FANTASTIC, i reread it often, and it makes me go crazy every time. the way you write Jason is actually so amazing, and i eat it up every time. i also adore your most recent fic, about Red Hood falling asleep next to you, and URGRHRHRH ITS SO CUTE. i genuinely love the reveal, and how cute and fluffy it is. i love your fics so so so much, and everything you post makes me happy. you seem so sweet and kind, and i just love seeing you on my feed!!! as a fellow jason todd enjoyer, i love your fics an unhealthy amount.

@hanasnx - you are actually so cool AND i love your theme so much its so unique!!!! from star wars to DC, literally everything you write is amazing. i LOVE your anakin skywalker and han solo fics, along with all of your jason todd, dick grayson fics, and terry mcginnis fics. your headcanons are amazingg and i actually adore your writing style. i seriously struggle to find anyone else who writes terry as well as you do, and i LOVE how you write for the batboys as well. your smut is delicious, and i seriously love seeing you on my dash. you also have some really good takes outside of writing, and i agree with you a lot as a person. you just seem like such a talented writer, and i fucking love everything you post!!!!

@uc1wa - your frat!dick hits so hard- like SERIOUSLYYY you have one of the best interpretations of him i've seen and its sooo yummy. i love your writing and headcanons so much, i actually love the way you write smut. your writing style is so descriptive, and the way you write dialogue is actually delicious. your DC fics are to die for, and i find myself scrolling through your blog a LOT lmao. seriously never stop, you are so talented and i love everything you write!!!

@chikaras-garden - you are soo aaaaaaa!!!! i love love LOVE the way you write beyond!damian, seriously those are some of my favorite fics of all time. your on eof the few fic authors i know who write for him, and your literally so good at it!!!!!!! i eat it up every single time, you are SO talented!!!! i also adore the way you write Dick and Jason, you characterize them so well and your fics are always sooo yummy. i love seeing you on my dash, literally all of your fics and thirsts are fantastic

@dayasusays - your smut fics are literally FANTASTIC- seriously, the way you incorporate dialogue is so great, and i love love LOVEEE your dick grayson fics. your welcome back fic is SO bittersweet, but also so delicious at the same time. the way you use emotions and descriptions within your writing is fantastic, and your vocabulary is so good too. your fics are all so unique, and i love your headcanons too!!!! i love all of your husband!bruce wayne hcs, they're actually soooo yummy!!!! all in all, your fics are AMAZING and i would reread your entire masterlist everyday if i could.

@ivysangel - i love your blog SOOO much its uncanny- your frat!hcs are literally my fav of all time. i think about them 24/7, 365 days a year. everything you write is SO good, like seriouslyyyyyyy i adore it. i LOVEEEEEEEEEE everything you write for dick grayson, you characterize him SO well and it makes me go crazy every single time- same for jason todd, overall you are so so talented and your fics are amazing- same with your headcanons!!! your blog is so pretty and you seem so sweet, i just love seeing you on my dash!!

@martiniluvr - you were the first DC fic blog i ever followed, and your fics are SO good- you inspired me to write for DC in the first place, and literally EVERYTHINGGG you post is actually fantastic. i fucking LOOOVE your dick grayson and jason todd nsfw alphabet, and literally everything you post is to die for. i love your DC batboys hcs in general, and your most recent fantasize hcs post?? AAHEHSJSHSJDH i was SCREAMINGG- seriously you are so so so talented and i LOVE your characterization. i also adore the way you write Bruce, and seeing you on my dash is like a wish come true.

@archangeldyke-all - ANOTHER ONE OF MY FAV MUTUALS!!! i love love LOVE all of your sevika fics, she is criminally underrated and the love of my life. we seriously need more wlw fanfic blogs on here, and your definitely one of my favs. i LOVE your fic about cockwarming sevika, i think about it OFTEN and urgrhrhrh shes just sooo pretty. i love everything you write and i devour it everytime- seriously, never stop!!!!! i do not see enough sevika x reader on here, and i love how much you write for her. seeing you on my dash makes me sosososos happy, and i just love how energetic and sweet you seem!!!!

@makethatelevenrings - your writing is phenomenal, especially the way you write for Jason Todd !!!! i LOVE your two scoops series, and also adore everything you write for Dick Grayson and DC in general. you are truly sosoososos talented and i aspire to achieve your use of descriptions and adjectives! the way you characterize the characters in your writing is just fantastic, and i've never read a fic of yours that i haven't enjoyed !

@shiggyhatesme - oh em gee ! i know i just followed you recently, but i LOVE LOVE LOOOOVEE your writing so much ! the way you invoke emotions within your writing is actually fantastic, every single time i read your fics i start to lose my marbles in the best way ! your characterization of dabi is absolutely fantastic, your probably one of my favorite writers for him, and your genuinely amazing. i also LOVE ur theme and how you make your fics so visually appealing!!!

@bbluefllame - your writing has me giggling twirling my hair and kicking my feet genuinely truly and soulfully your writing pulled me out of a writers block i didn't even know i was in !!!! i fucking LOOOVE your smau's, and your full fics/drabbles are also just so fun to read ! your characterization of touya/dabi is genuinely amazing, like one of the best ive ever seen. i also love how spirited and bright you make "y/n" in your fics, and i find your writing to just be so relatable and creative !!! you deserve sm more attention ur literally so underrated !!!

@heavysighing-dreamyeyes - i adore you- your jason todd fics ARE SOOO AMAZING it makes me begin to TWEAK !!!! your so soulful and genuine in your writing, and i love how you incorporate and convey emotions within your fics. your jason todd is just so real and raw and fantastic, and between the smut and the fluff i just adore everything you write!!!! you are so so talented and wonderful !!!

@sodapopwrites - ive never met an eris vanserra writer that didn't cook EVERY SINGLE TIMEEEE and you never fail to disappoint !!!! your first sign of fall series has actually changed my LIFE LMAO- you are so descriptive, relatable, and creative! the terminology and vocabulary you incorporate in your fics creates such an emotional and professional vibe, and you are great at describing scenarios and emotions. i can vividly picture myself in your acotar modern au's, and the characterization and bonds between characters you include in your fics is just phenomenal. you are a truly spectacular writer !!!

@accidentcache - oh my goodness gracious you are so so so talented it makes me INSANEEEE. from your smau's to your full fics, i actually adore u and everything u write !!!! ur impossibly amazingly talented and i love ur characterization of touya!!! ur touya is literally just. the realest ever. I ALSO ADORE UR TODO-SIBLINGS GC SMAU I EAT IT UP EVERY TIMEEEE and one of my personal fav fics of yours is the "pieces of me on you" fic its literally my roman empire i think about it CONSTANTLYYYY ur literally so wonderful and an incredible writer !

@suksatoru - where do i even begin aaaaa !!! u are so sweet and whimsical and i love ur writing to the moon and back. your carnations fic is always on my mind, the way u write for Touya is so soulful and beautiful it makes me want to SOB. ur characterization is incredible, and your use of both vocabulary and description is just. chefs kiss. i love ur writing soo much, pls never stop being u !!!

@corpsekiller - U ARE SO TALENTED AAHSHSJSHDJ- i love ur writing style and use of vocabulary, u make everything u write sound so eloquent and fluid and i adore it !!!! i absolutely love everything angsty that u write, it always hits so hard. I REALLY LOVE UR FIC "a knife called grief" IT ACTUALLY CONSUMES ME ON A DAILY BASIS!!! in addition to this ur literally just. so cool. i love ur theme and ur vibe u just seem so chill and IRGH ur blogs r so aesthetic i canttt

@rueclfer - oh em gee oh em gee. i swear im literally ur biggest fan ur writing is genuinely some of the best ive ever read on here !!!! i really adore how u characterize both the reader and the characters in ur writing, u make the relationships seems so real and palpable it's truly amazing. maybe i have a bias but i LOVE the way u write for shigaraki and touya, u literally have the biblically accurate characterizations of them both and i eat it up everytime. I LOVE UR CLOCKED IN/NEOPET GRAVEYARD SMAU + FIC ITS SO CUTE AND SO COMFORTING,,,,,

@bugsyonline - i literally just followed u and idk how i havent seen ur stuff before !!! ur hockey au tomura has me in a chokehold and ive been brainrotting ab it EVER SINCE U POSTED IT AJDBSJJ seriously truly soulfully U ARE SOOO TALENTED !!!! u also seem so chill and sweet, and i just love ur overall vibes !!!!

this took so long aaa- but it was worth it!!!!!!! i will be updating this as i go, and i am so so sooo sorry if i forgot anyone!!!! anyways, i hope this made some people happy, i know it made me happy!!!!! if you aren't a fic writer and are just reading this for fun, pls check these writers out!!! remember to reblog and send your fellow fic writers some love, they deserve it!!!!

[zooliminology]

Update/What's in the Future

[Hey guys, you probably have noticed that this is going to be likely the longest dry spell of real Zoolim content in a while. I apologize for this. Life has gotten in the way of a lot of things.

-I'm an art student in college, and last semester I didn't take any art classes so I was basically free to do whatever, but this semester I've taken three studio art classes, which are all very intensive and in honesty I would not recommend it! If you're a studio art student stick to 1-2 studio art classes a semester so you don't go insane please! I'm currently absolutely SWAMPED with work right now. -The Golbo video and the video that is imminently due this Tuesday (that i am writing this post about instead of working on) are the results of my New Media class. Considering the ten thousand million fucking art assets I have to draw for these it's been very time consuming (still want to do it though.) -A lot of life things have happened to me recently, not to be super personal but a family member of mine is sick and my living conditions are not the absolute Best, so it's been taking a heavy toll on my health.

All of these combined, especially the studio classes part because I've been bled dry of creativity energy relating to zoolim basically, has caused this dry spell basically. My hopes are that after the semester ends (which is soon) I'll be able to work on things more. I feel bad about not working on it more but I have to draw things other than zoolim to literally stay sane because it's a lot.

So I guess that leaves us with one question: what's in the future?

Well, a lot of things... maybe? I'm a little dry on entity ideas right now but i have a few, and I'd like to revisit some entities more and expand on them. And while I enjoy the videos and the non-entry ideas I have for material, I would also like to continue the 'traditional' paintings and entries. So I hope I can work on that alongside other things! I also have more ideas for videos, but considering how I have to do nearly all of the work, aside from the narration (thanks Darvinos) any video production will likely slow down dramatically after the semester is over. Until my next New Media class at least, but IDK if it will let me make the same shit.

I also have some deeper lore and a story semi-figured out, along with characters (you ever wonder who's taking the pictures? not the same person who's writing the captions!!!) but they would be hard to implement in this tumblr blog organically, so maybe they'll show up in some videos. I've thought of asking more people for help for this purpose, though I'd need to work out completely how that would work, and the moment that zoolim becomes more than some backrooms world i work on mostly by myself will become scary.

Sorry that this post is a big ramble, I hope yall understand and I swear the Longlegs video will come out pretty soon, it will be worked on again right after I post this lol. But please take care, and thank you for all the support you've shown me so far. It truly does mean a lot to me. I've said it several times but I'll say it again, I never imagined this shitty little art project about weird goobers in the backrooms would get so much attention lol.

ok end of post]

[btr-rewatch]

Big Time Rush Fandom lore from back in the day

The fandom during the years the show was on was booming with constant content being churned out, especially fanfics. Most of the BTR fanfic community knew each other and formed collective headcanons and lore that were then spread and picked up by the rest of the fandom (ie tumblr). I had only just recently discovered online fandom spaces at the time, so I didn't contribute fanfics or anything (which is good because I was young, and they would have been terrible), but I did absorb a good deal that stuck with me. Thought it might be fun to share. A lot of this might still apply today but truth be told, I don't really know much about the current fandom headcanons. I'm still learning things as I continue to interact with people on here! Also! Idk if anyone currently in the fandom was around during Miss Fenway's reign, but she was the Queen of the BTR fandom and most "famous" of the fanfic community. A lot of the headcanons adopted by the fandom started with her and were quickly picked up by others.

Kendall • Pretty much unanimous agreement that his father was a deadbeat who had walked out on the family very shortly after Katie was born. This explains why there is ZERO mention of him in the show, no family pictures in the background that hint at a father still being in their lives, etc. He caused them a lot of pain, so they erased any trace of him. • Some people took a little bit of a kinder approach to him, where he was a genuinely loving dad when Kendall was very young, but then things unraveled, and he ended up leaving. • He was big into hockey, which sparked Kendall's love for the sport. • Lots of sad fanfics involving Little Kendall dealing with his parents deteriorating marriage and being forced to "take charge" once his dad left. • Also agreement that he likely dealt with a decent amount of anxiety and very clear abandonment issues, along with a hero complex. • Naturally, Kendall was very often the focus of intensely angsty fics. He was always being pushed to the limit, ignoring his own issues, sacrificing himself, etc until he reached his breaking point.

Logan • Prior to the airing of Big Time Moms, it was generally headcanoned that Logan's mother had died when he was very young, and he was being raised by his father. • It was also headcanoned (in the fanfic-sphere at least) that Logan's dad was an awful person. Don't ask me how this came to be because I don't actually know. All I remember is discovering fanfiction, reading fic after fic of Logan's dad being horrible, and going, "Huh, I guess that's a thing." • Logan's dad ranged anywhere from being a raging workaholic who totally ignored & neglected Logan to being outright abusive. • The main reason Logan threw himself so hard into school and being "smart" was so his father would notice him. It did not work. • Because of this, the fandom headcanoned that Logan was pretty much "adopted" into the Knight family from the moment he befriended Kendall. Mrs. Knight is the one who raised him and gave him love, and so he and Kendall grew up as brothers. (Several fanfics even had Logan be officially adopted into the Knight family at some point) • If there was an award for most tortured character in BTR fanfiction, Logan would have won hands down during the 2009-2013 fanfic era. This guy was put through the wringer! He was always experiencing trauma. When he wasn't being emotionally scarred by his dad, he was dying tragically or losing an arm in a shark attack or getting brain damage or being kidnapped. Logan suffered constantly lol the poor guy.

Carlos • He likely got the best, most lighthearted side of fandom headcanons and probably suffered the least in fics. Largely because he's Carlos, and nobody wants to hurt Carlos. • From a big, loud, happy family. Definitely the healthiest, most stable upbringing of all the boys. • Babied and loved so so much by his parents. • People had different ideas regarding the actual makeup of his immediate family, but most people headcanoned him as the oldest and only boy, with 3 or 4 much younger sisters. • His father was often written as having a special bond with Logan. I remember a trend in fics where Logan called Mr. Garcia "papa" and looked to him as the main father figure in his life. • It's still assumed that Carlos has a serious case of ADHD, right? Because that was a given back in the day. James • Honestly, I remember the least amount of James lore. Let's see... • Only child • Uses his superficial exterior to hide the fact he's deeply insecure • Actually feels everything so deeply that he has to pretend he doesn't care to avoid getting hurt. This was used to many fic writer's advantage. • Loved by his parents, but they don't show it well, and he grew up feeling disconnected from them. And that's about all I've got!

I should dig back through my old list of bookmarked fanfics at some point and make a post of the ones that were my favorites.

[kaypeace21]

[The future of this BLOG]: SHOWS I'm planning on analyzing here & on YouTube

Interview with the vampire

Invincible

House of the dragon

The boys

Umbrella acadamy

Bridgerton probably (still haven't had time to watch part 2 yet)

stranger things: I have mixed feelings about reviewing it given what certain staff has said and done. I oscilate between wanting to review the final season or wanting to boycott it (especially as someone who has been part of the BDS movement for 1/2 her life). But, on one hand, It's not the fault of the underpaid (and talented) writers and staff who don't have these views. And I do believe some of the writing staff may have good intentions and want to give us a positive and powerful message to the audience about healing from childhood tr*uma. However, other members of the writing staff may just want to go down the stereotypical and popular-easy route. We'll just have to wait and see what happens in the last season. If I hear the ending isn't simply another re-hashing of prior seasons and it's more like s1-2 (without the cliches of s3-4). I'd be more inclined to review it by *cough* and watching it elsewhere. Once I was logged back on to tumblr: I did have a whole draft saved about my politics since I was a kid and why I still feel so strongly about such conflicts, today . But, I shouldn't make the topic about me- and I'm not sure anyone wants to hear my life story XD. So, the big point (to my followers) is regardless of whether I chose to watch it or boycot it-

I'm not deleting the old ST content: so do what you want with it (like, reblog, add details to reblogs I didn't notice). Have fun :D !

Analyzing ST certainly helped me improve in terms of media literacy (and it'll be beneficial for the future content I make). So even if it sometimes got messy here, I do appreciate all the positives the ST blog and followers brought to me.The kind words meant a lot. For those who want to unfollow me for my political beliefs , that's totally fine. That's your prerogative. For those who want to unfollow cause again ST was pretty much my whole blog: again I TOTALLY understand and I wish you the best :). I'm not going to judge, take away, or guilt anyone, for their choice of media they like. Enjoy it (I truly mean that).

For those who continue to follow my blog . I appreciate you SO MUCH! I've been gone from this blog for such a long time cause of school (and I appreciate those who stayed and were excited to see me again). The positive words meant a lot over the years. Everyone have a lovely day. Take care of yourselves.

Sincerely, Kay

ps: I'm open to other media suggestions too so you can drop them in my message box (recent films/ shows, mini/limited series, animation, heck i'm open to comedies and foreign media too).But, analyzing them will most likely be after the shows listed above .Right now I'm focusing on my national exam and my mental health. My first video will probably be in late August or early September. My test is August 20th. Hope everyone is doing well .I'm feeling much better mentally. Hope everyone is feeling the same way :)

for my 1st video I’ll just post it to youtube . But for other videos I may make a early access patreon (like a week before the next video comes out free on youtube). Have to google how all that works (or if there's better alternatives) . Totally fine if you can't afford it (you'll get to see it for free on youtube regardless :D) . I'll be honest . I'm primarily thinking of doing it cause I need to pay off those student loans and I'm trying to hopefully move out of state in a few years. Plus, I love analyzing media anyways (so making it a part time job would be a dream come true .

[itzsana-kiddingmenow]

Announcement:

hey guys, this is sana. a proper explanation is probably something you all are expecting, but it would be impossible for me to explain everything i've been thinking lately...there's too much.

lately, my mental health has been...well, bad. i'm sure you're all aware of my anxiety + depression [deadly combo, i know] and how because of recent events in my irl side, i've started to lose control of my ability to well...um, keep that in check.

a lot of that has been expressed through some of the vents i do on here, which i've started to realize has become pretty common. i'm so so so sorry for trauma dumping on you guys, my baby sanshines. you guys seriously didn't deserve that and i truly deeply apologize for it :(

as per this mental health defect or whatever you guys want to call it, i've decided to log off tumblr for a little while just to focus on myself. please please please don't hate me if i dont respond to your messages or anything, i swear it isnt on purpose.

i'm not exactly sure when i'll come back...? maybe a week or a few days, until i'm able to get a grip and stop being all weak yk?

a lot had happened today within my family, and i've started to realize that the problem was not entirely my family's fault. i blamed a lot on them when i was the same...i was being toxic and blatantly rude to them, and that caused them a lot of pain too. my family's super broken right now and that's caused so much torment within our bond and i'm super sorry if any of that showed up here.

you guys can continue to interact with my blog while i'm gone, but if you decide to dm me through any means other than tumblr, please don't mention anything happening here or stuff...i'll just have the urge to come back haha...

thank you to all my sanshines, you all are my darlings and i love you so much, i'm so sorry, i hope you'll forgive me...

all the love in the world,

sana ~

[a-student-out-of-time]

An Announcement (I'm NOT on hiatus!)

//Hey everyone, Mod Bubbles here.

//I understand that, lately, activity around here has been pretty quiet. I just wanted to give you an update on what's going on and what I've been considering, since it involves you guys as well:

//Firstly, this blog is not discontinued or on hiatus, I've just been busy lately. I fully intend to continue it soon, and I'm sorry for everyone who's been looking forward to me doing so. I know that you all have been waiting on the continuation and aren't really all that into me streaming, but that brings me to my next point.

//Second, this is ultimately just a passion project. I don't make money off of writing this, but I CAN make money by streaming, and right now I need to focus on what's tangibly beneficial to my life. Especially because my setup is slowly falling apart- my mouse barely works, my laptop has dead keys and it won't survive when support for Windows 10 is discontinued, and recently my wired headphones died thanks to a frayed cord.

//What I'm saying is, if you want ASooT to continue soon, I need your help to allow it to do so. I'd love to have a higher-end PC or something, but ultimately I just need computer that works and a source of income. I'm very close to reaching Twitch affiliate status, which means I can actually start earning money from hanging out and chatting with you guys.

//I've had people who wanted to know how they can help me, and this is currently the best option. I really do wanna be able to talk with you all and have a good time, but I do also need enough to help keep all this going.

//Third, I understand if people would rather I not use this blog as a place to advertise my streams, since I've said this is my story blog. That's why I've been considering something that I'd previously dismissed or put off for a long time, but since I've been trying to overcome my social anxiety, why not?

//I thought about establishing a community Discord server.

//One where we can all hang out, talk about DR or whatever else, and you can receive notifications whenever I go live. Not as a replacement to Tumblr, since I know people on here who don't have a Discord, but as a supplemental.

//That'll probably take sometime and I'll need some reliable mods for that, but it's an idea!

//Until then, I'll be posting on here just so everybody knows when I'm live.

//I'm really sorry the story's ground to a halt for so long and thank you all so much for being patient with me.

[2willowlane]

i've been posting silly crack fanfiction on ao3 lately, and i decided to just upload this on my tumblr. it's inspired off of interstellartoaster's kalampokiphobia: fear of corn, and the mods harvey's irrational apple hatred and harvey hates apples.

fantastic works; mind you.

gender neutral reader, sfw; not really focused on romance, as it is just absurdity

tallying his profit, of which was a big fat zero, harvey sighed; pushing up his glasses. it's been a rather long week for him, considering no one wants to buy those energy tonic muscle whatever medication that he supplies. the only time that anyone has ever purchased such a redundant item from him, was whenever they misclick- accidentally bought it; and then just sold it again. the only way that he'll ever make a good buck out of his pharmaceutical care was if he just eradicated the valley's food supply... of which, did sound tempting, but harvey loves his pickles too much to give them up.

there haven't been any appointments placed recently, so he was having a hard time trying to keep up with the expenses. right now, he could so go for a bottle of fine wine... maybe it's because he's spending too much of his expenses on plane models, rather than actually trying to keep up with all of the financial records, like an actual adult should. huh, what a foreign concept. well, he's just going to go continue complaining about his money situation, until further notice.

with the door opening, he had to them correct his shrimp posture, as he then greeted you, the almost superhuman farmer, into the clinic. normally, you just like to go behind the counter and access rooms that are off-limits to regular patients, but there was something about your gumption that made you so lovable. even if you do tend to barge into private examinations, there was something that made you feel so rebellious; that harvey couldn't help but swoon over you! also, he's a pathetic beanpole of a man, so he'll probably get pummeled into the ground by your combat prowess if he ever rejects your blatant non-filtered view of what "personal space" meant.

you were about to get some items turned into the community center; as you were carrying a basket full of assorted goods (they ranged from something simple to five highly-graded melons, a still-flopping ghostfish, and poisonous mushrooms). oh well, with the poisonous mushrooms, those are harvey's choice of decoration during the autumn seasons; so, the doctor felt rather seen whenever he saw those clumped together. he grimaced at the fish, however. other than that, he was glad to see a good friend pop in now and then; he needed something to spice up his days, and he can always expect you at around 9am, or somehow always being in the places he's trying to go to... coincidence?

normally, you'd stop on buy and get him a coffee. either you've brewed it yourself, or stopped by gus', it was coffee. you wonder how many mugs harvey has, considering you also gift him a free cup alongside the sweet, sweet ground bean liquid. it really wasn't the healthiest thing to drink due to the sugar and caffeine levels, and you were pretty worried for the guy who has been through years and years of intensive schooling to know better about those dietary concerns. you assume he probably only has a cup twice a week, considering you have some type of intergalactic force keeping you from extending that quota.

you had some apples somewhere on your person, and it was probably the only thing he'd like; you'd figure. after all, they're just funky little guys. who doesn't like a good, crisp apple? even though they're supposed to be for the community center, you can always just get one later. you'd give harvey something else, but you decided that he deserved better than just countless upon countless liters of his favourite brew. you knew harvey appreciated a good foraged, natural good—especially with someone locally grown on your acres. fishing out an apple out of your pockets, you then present it to him.

"... i think i may be allergic to this."

as harvey looked like a sad shih tzu puppy, looking off to the side, your heart sank. he was allergic to apples? at first, you really wanted to make fun of him. he seemed like the type of person who'd be allergic to peanut butter, and be the kid that doesn't allow their classmates to bring in anything homemade due to those medical reasons. holding the red delicious apple in your hands, rotating it around in your palm, you decided to test that theory.

"may?" you inquiried, and with a look of horror, harvey began to shudder. yes, he's an anxious man at heart, but due to various interesting cases at the clinic, he's grown insensitive to many things. plus, he's in front of the one and only farmer(tm), and his crush. god, what an embarrassment he is. he didn't want to talk about his irrational hatred for apples; those disgusting overblown flower ovaries called "fruit" just sicken him to death, not to mention that the apples were the first to hate HIM—it wasn't his fault that his body rejects them!

"yes, yes! just- just get it away from me!"

"i don't believe you..."

and that's where you've learnt that the phrase "an apple a day keep the doctor away" was right.

[daniclaytcn]

Tumblr Fandom: A Year in Review 2023

i was tagged by @mistmarauder, thank you!!

Top Five Blorbos:

Eddie Diaz (9-1-1)

Nancy Wheeler (Stranger Things)

Nancy Drew (Nancy Drew)

Alex Claremont-Diaz (Red, White & Royal Blue)

Lucy Preston (Timeless)

Top Five Fandoms:

9-1-1

Red, White & Royal Blue

Stranger Things

The Haunting Anthology

Nancy Drew

Top Five OTPs:

Evan Buckley/Eddie Diaz (9-1-1)

Lucy Chen/Tim Bradford (The Rookie)

Nancy Drew/Ace (Nancy Drew)

Lucy Preston/Garcia Flynn (Timeless)

Dani Clayton/Jamie Taylor (The Haunting of Bly Manor)

Shoutout to Some New Friends:

@eddiediaaz we've been mutuals since last year but i feel like we talked a lot more this year, so i'm very grateful for that ❤ @poughkeepsies is one of my dearest mutuals on here and i love you and all your takes <33 and also @ice-sculptures i've adored following you over this year!

Shoutout to Some Old Friends:

all of my love to the one and only @tawaifeddiediaz, i don't know where i'd be without her to rant and get emotional over our blorbos with and she's just such a wholesome soul!! and of course, @bieddiediaz and @oneawkwardcookie, the besties, i love you guys so so much ❤❤

Favorite Creation You Posted This Year:

i'm very proud of my fic, but i can see all along, love (it was you all the way down) <3

Favorite Creation Posted by Someone Else This Year:

oh gosh this is SUCH a difficult question because there are so many amazing creations from this insanely talented fandom—but i'd have to go with @eddiediaaz's speak now gifset it was so incredible!

People Who Brightened Your Year:

too many people to count—@buck2eddie @lover-of-mine @jeeyuns @diazass @kitkatpancakestack @bieddiediaz @tawaifeddiediaz and so many others i'm probably forgetting!

Anyone Else You'd Like to Mention:

there are just too many people to mention—every single one of my mutuals on here, and all the kind people who've sent me lovely messages (anonymous or not) and all the people who continue to follow me!!

Five of Your Favorite Authors This Year:

elless continues to be an all-time favourite, they have some of the most beautiful fics in the fandom ❤❤

@tawaifeddiediaz is the most talented person ever ily 😘

@letmetellyouaboutmyfeels is another favourite!! your halloween fics were SUCH a treat and i'm sitll working my way through them!!

@cal-daisies-and-briars has fics with some of the most intriguing concept and is honestly a powerhouse—it seems like you're posting fic all the time!

@bvckandeddie i recently discovered your fics and they're just *chefs kiss* so delightful!!

Five of Your Favorite Artists/Gifmakers/Podficcers/Etc. This Year:

no list about gifmakers is complete without @eddiediaaz who is so talented and creative it makes me wanna cry (with joy!)

@padme-amidala while i don't follow most of the media you post gifs for, your work is so stunning and i'm so obsessed!!

@stationoneeighteen i love love all of your gifs especially the ones that focus on the firefam, they're so good ❤❤

@buckleys-diaz alie you haven't been around for a while (and i hope you're doing well!) but you've always been one of the most talented gifmakers in this fandom and i've always looked up to you <3

@roseapothecary your gifs are so so gorgeous and i've adored all of your rwrb sets!! they're so pretty and creative!!

Three Things You're Looking Forward to in 2024:

the new season of 9-1-1 and also the PJO tv series!!

Tagging:

tagging everyone who's already been mentioned in this post <33

[comfortlesshurt]

alrighty, I locked in for a couple days and now I get to reward myself by yelling into the tumblr void about the series progress

first off, there are TWO FICS over 50% done, v exciting stuff. I know they've been over 50% for a bit now, but like... let me have my motivation, okay? we are in the HARD PART of the project where it all looks overwhelming, so I'll take the wins I can

also tex fic is finished and through round 1 of editing. it still needs another major edit and i need to finish fic 1 to make sure no info conflicts between the two, but the serious work for that is done

there are a few more days left before NotNaNo, but even going in with today's word counts, focusing on fics 1 and 2 should put them pretty close to finished by the end of November unless I was super off with the word count estimate

also had a really good writing day yesterday!

ignore those date projections at the bottom because like... those assume either i write 3k every day or i write 3k twice a week and 1.2k the other 5 days, and I canNOT do that consistently. but that July 23rd date is realistic! that's me continuing to hit my average based on the past 106 days since starting this project, so there's a good chance I finish this project in a total of just over a year (in which case I will never shut up about writing 450k in a year, so watch out)

finally, fic 1 is a huge portion of that daily par number in the first row, so... unless I fall majorly away from the intended timeline, that required daily par will go down a LOT at the end of december, which will be nice. the goal is still to focus a lot on this project and only really jump over to side projects as they call to me, but it's easier to do that when your average isn't struggling to keep up with your daily par number. it simply does not feel good to be constantly working just to barely get over the par.

as far as editing, i'm starting to fear i didn't budget enough time for that in my early projections, so the timeline might be off there. those due dates listed are for the final rough draft, which doesn't get a chance to rest before immediately going into a month of editing. something just tells me now that a month isn't going to be enough to cover a content edit for each fic. it's also relying on the technical edits being done week-to-week as each chapter goes up.

also added one more tracking tool recently:

this is to look at all the projects week-to-week, and really what it's done is made it obvious that I am in fact very focused on fic 1 lmao. in my defense, that's the one that has consistently had the highest required par, so it's easy to treat it as the most important. also, up to 27-aug is rough. I started writing these fics in Word, so I didn't have day-to-day stats to go back and check. I could only find those once I switched to Reedsy, so for the record I did not write 54k between 20-aug and 27-aug. same with the tex fic--that wasn't all written in one week.

this chart still only looks at ILaD progress, so you can see where I take my break in October and it cuts down a lot... but that's excluding the 10k that went into an unrelated fic, so I don't think taking this break has actually cut down on my writing much. it's just made me have a better time with it temporarily. i took a couple days off writing completely during October but like... I didn't really enjoy that? so I don't think that's the solution I'm looking for long-term.

anyway, thanks for coming to my ted talk. i will infodump again, and probably soon since all the end of the month posts are coming up in the next week.

[sasori-rp]

A much needed Post

Good evening everyone, I hope you're all having a good day.💜

Yes, I probably tagged you in this, dear stranger. Before you click off, I ask you to give me 5 minutes of your time. Just 5, then you can go about your day. But I would appreciate it, if you listened to what I have to say, because it means a lot to me and many...many others.

I'm posting today, because this topic has been on my heart lately and I wanted to share my thoughts with you. I'm sure you've already guessed that this is about the whole Kisame-anon chaos.

Before we begin, I want to get this out of the way: This post is coming from a genuine and loving place. My goal is not to point fingers, nor placing blame or justify anyone's actions, including my own. This post is about me, trying to understand the entire situation and providing my sentiments to it.

Act I: Why do I not just shut up?

Why do I get involved you might ask? It's not so much that I want to get involved. It's more that any anon who begins their journey here, gets inevitably sucked into it. We are faced with angry posts, confusing explanations and forced to choose who to believe and support. If you don't, you walk on eggshells filled with guilt and if you do, you're being blocked by the entire half of the disagreeing party.

This is not what I signed up for.

I come on to Tumblr to Roleplay and have fun. I've been having a splendid time here. You guys are making me so happy as of late, allowing me to play freely and giving me a space for all my creative ideas. And I want to continue doing so.

I want to be able to chat up anyone, without fearing that someone else will jump at my throat for it. That includes Kisame, Hidan, Orochimaru and many more of you wonderdul RPers.

Recently I have noticed that I've been blocked by several people and I can guess, what the reason is. And it saddens me because...I like you guys. We were talking and sharing fun experiences, only for me to discover that I am suddenly cut off from it. For no other reason than that I interact with a person they have a quarrel with. And that is just...not the solution. So what is the solution?

Act II: The Anon War in a nutshell

Now, from my understanding, there is a big rift between two groups.

1) Those who have received digital harassment in form of hate/rape/death threats (and believe Kisame-anon to be the culprit)

and

2) Those who defend Kisame against those claims, or, like me, don't just blindly hop onto a hate train they saw on the internet

Again, my goal with this post is not to be the divine judge over who is in the right here. It is, objectively, pretty much impossible from an outsider's standpoint. And additionally, I don't think either of you is necessarily to blame for your individual reactions.

I absolutely feel for you guys, Hidan-anon and your friends. I, too, would be seething if someone I love was harrassed in the way Hidan (and co) has been. I do not know the extent of the harrassment. But I believe you when you say, that you've suffered. And I am very sorry you have been through that.

I also feel for Hidans friends, who, (bless their hearts) really are trying to protect them from further harm. An absolutely understandable sentiment.

I do however, also really feel for Kisame, who, (bear with me here) is probably being framed. They have been faced with a lot of backlash from party 1, have tried to defend themselves to no avail, up to the point of having to retreat. And all that...for what?

Act III: The Point I'm trying to make

Do none of you realise, that you're being pinned against each other?

There is a person (or perhaps several) that has harrassed Hidan-anon with very vile threats and they are getting away with it. There is someone out there, that is having the time of their life, watching you scratch each others eyes out, causing pain and suffering for everyone involved, while they sit back and watch the show.

Kisame-anon has not sent you these messages. They have proof of it. Wether you believe them or not, is up to you, but...

Do you really want to keep hurling hate at a person, that is just as much a victim as you are? A person who, themselves, is a victim of sexual abuse and would never even think of the idea of sending someone rape threats?

Would you not rather work together to bring that (pardon my french) asshat to justice, that is playing sick games with the both of you?

And mind you, it's not just Kisame you're isolating. You're isolating their friends, who are doing the same as you: Protecting those they care about.

You're isolating kind strangers like me, who just want to roleplay without the drama, by blocking them by mere association.

And you're isolating oblivious newcomers, who might have the misfortune of stumbling over the "wrong" blog at the wrong time.

This is not okay guys.

And coercing others into doing the same (blocking by association) is further doing damage, because many people just want to stay away from the drama and thus do as you say without much thought. The whole thing is harmful in itself, but it's worse, because you're doing it to the wrong person.

Kisame has evidence that they're innocent. Kisame also has a quite solid theory who it is. Do you not want to at least have a look at it?

If you truly care about the safety and wellbeing of your friends, I strongly suggest you do. Because the actual predator is still out there.

I am glad that Hidan went to the police. I hope that they find who is behind all of this and that they get taken care of for good. Because like things stand now, you're about to drag an innocent person to the guillotine and letting the true perpetrator go. And you're dividing an entire RP fandom, that used to be a safe space.

I don't want this to happen.

Act IV: So...what now?

I want this post to be a wake up call. A wake up call for all those who are as confused, as I was and unsure what to do; but also, especially, to Hidan-anon and friends. Please, let us put down arms and find a solution.

I care about you. And I care about Kisame. And I love this little RP space we built and the friends I made here. I want us to stand together, acknowledge each other's suffering and grow as people. Let us talk things out.

I want this post to be a safe place for exchange. Feel free to add your thoughts and sentiments in the comments. Everything is welcome, as long as it is respectful and communicated calmly. I am more than happy to provide you with a neutral ground to talk things out. My DMs and Asks are always open for anyone who needs an ear or a shoulder.

We, as Naruto fans, more than anyone else, should know that hate creates nothing but more hate. So let us lead with compassion and patience. And listen to each other. Thank you for your attention.

[lazaruspiss]

recently realized that dick had a relationships with all three of his rapists beyond one incident, like he lived with liu and eddie for a while, mirage posed as kori for an extended period of time and we really have no way of knowing how long he was with catalina, this creates a pattern of people that he knows betraying him and using him for their own gratification

which makes me think of his relationships with his family and friends rn, if one of them started crossing boundaries would he accept it? would he even have expected it? if babs didn’t hear him say wait one night would he know that it’s a mistake or would he think “ah, you too?”

like he loves his family and trusts them with his life but I don’t think he can trust them not to hurt him and that includes sexually, part of it is the constant paranoia that comes with being a vigilante for almost two decades and part of it is unprocessed trama but thinking anyone could start to abuse him probably isn’t good for his health or for his relationships lmao

oh for sure for sure!! im also fairly convinced dick would struggle seeing any of those incidents as rape. the liu incident doesn't meet the proper legal qualifications, he was at times blamed by his own team for what happened with mirage, and so much plays into the situation with catalina that im not sure he'd even be able to process it at all. the murder takes priority, and he'd see it more through a lense of him failing to save cat than him being assaulted.

dick wouldn't /want/ to have been assaulted, so i don't think he'd categorize any of that as rape. if others cross boundaries, he might justify/minimize it out of habit. less that he thinks anyone could/would abuse him, and more that he would never recognize harm done to him as abuse.

(some notes for those without context on some of the stuff being referred to!)

liu and eddie: there's a storyline in which dick runs away at 16 (or as he puts it, one month short of 17) and lives on his own. by which i mean, most likely homeless. he works as a dishwasher iirc. one day, his coworker recommends these people who take in teenaged runaways and offers them a place to stay. it's functionally a gang that uses cult recruitment tactics to manipulate teenagers into doing their bidding. the /they/ being liu and eddie. dick is just another kid, and doesnt realize what they're doing until he's already pretty deep in it. there's a fair amount of bonding and attachment, with liu and eddie showing him favoritism and singling him out in a way that makes them his primary support network. eventually this all leads to a sexual encounter between dick and liu. something worth noting: the age of consent in new jersey (where gotham is and where this story is set) is 16, and as it was a technically consensual encounter it is incredibly unlikely for it to be legally classified as rape/sexual assault.

mirage: ok imma be real u gotta ask someone else for this one. or maybe read the actual comics bc tumblr is a mess when looking for actually useful info.

catalina: ok!! ok... from my understanding there was originally going to be a full plotline about dick being in an abusive relationship with catalina, but it was rushed/cut short so that DC could put nightwing in a batman crossover event. classic. but dick had already been trying to mentor catalina for a decent while before she started abusing him. tried to /mentor/ her. her hurting him? to dick, it would likely feel like a reflection on him. that /he/ must have fucked up for her to end up doing something like that. it's left somewhat vague, but we don't have any reason to not believe cat continued to sexually abuse dick off page. we see her get him drunk and try to get him to sign marriage documents, she wants to /possess/ him. dick is incredibly dissociative throughout the aftermath, up until DC needed to force him out of his own story arc to hold daddy bat's hand. sorry lol

[karliahs]

okay just for fun i'm going to compile the garbled knowledge i have about what happens in bnha going forward (so everything after season 5 episode 8/middle of the joint training arc).

this is a few years of passively picking stuff up through tumblr, ao3 and a friend who reads the manga and would periodically upon request tell me how my kids were doing

so...bnha spoilers below the cut, including fairly recent manga spoilers. except they are incomplete, garbled and possibly entirely wrong

upcoming arcs: endeavour internship arc, plf arc, ??? other ones probably, final war arc

bakugou, midoriya & todoroki intern at endeavour's agency. endeavour redemption arc continues to be a thing that is happening

midoriya develops the past OFA users quirks - blackwhip first, then float, and then the others are i think...danger sense, smokescreen, some kind of...healing thing? i have definitely seen them all referenced in fic but i mostly just remember float and blackwhip

touya reveal!! dance with your son in hell!! we stan. i have no idea what the outcome of this is other than that i believe natsuo never gets on board with endeavour redemption but fuyumi does. i think maybe shouto as well...

at some point things about hawks?? and the hero commission's...stuff?? with hawks?? gets revealed publically and contributes to growing unrest about heroes' roles in society. and the touya stuff i think also gets revealed and contributes to this

oh kurogiri obviously. that's season 5 i'm pretty sure. kurogiri is a noumu made from oboro shirakumo, aizawa & mic's (& midnight's?) UA friend who they thought died under some rubble during agency placements. it was actually aizawa they were after but they got oboro instead. aizawa & mic go to confront him and try to get through to him and it initially does not work

while i'm on aizawa knowledge: he gets shot with a quirk destroying bullet in the leg and fucking cuts his own leg off to try and stop it from working. and on what is maybe a separate occasion he loses an eye, i think to shigaraki. idk if eri rewinds one of both of these injuries??

eri does successfully rewind mirio's quirk back. and at some point midoriya loses his goddamn arms?? but eri fixes that. so often when i asked my friend for updates it would end up being about how many limbs my faves currently had

midnight dies. idk how or why. twice i think also dies. again, no context.

aoyama is revealed as the UA traitor. he was born quirkless and was given his quirk by AFO. it was an overall sympathetic he had v few good choices kind of situation i think

at some point everything kind of collapses. i think this is to do with public reaction to hero stuff?? but the whole city seems kind of wrecked and a bunch of people are sheltering on UA's campus i think...and then midoriya for reasons i do not really understand runs off on his own for an iconic yellow scarf of sadness era of going rogue. and 1-a has to track him down and yell a lot about how they love him and he needs to cut it out. this includes a bakugou apology i believe

i think the midoriya run away coincides with OFA reveal?? he writes them letters i think...then he comes back and there's a lot of discussion about baths

climactic midoriya shigaraki fight...we find out shigaraki used to be quirkless. i think AFO gave him the quirk used to kill his family or something equally fucked up. midoriya...throws all his quirks out? to like? achieve something? so he (temporarily) is quirkless...

bakugou dies but they fix it. i think with...shigaraki...somehow. oh and at some point during all this i think kurogiri does do some helpful for the heroes teleporting?? so they maybe did get through to him in the end?

timejump and SHINSOU IS IN 2-A. this is the only thing that matters actually!! my boy!! he did it!!!!! he took aoyama's spot bc aoyama didn't feel like he could come back even tho he'd pretty much been forgiven. so we just missed canonising the iconic 'shinsou hitoshi is in class 1-a' tag bc it's 2-a and fully did not canonise the 'shinsou hitoshi replaces mineta minoru' tag

skjdhfh i'm sure i'm forgetting a bunch that i do actually know and just can't think of rn so i will maybe reblog this if i remember more

[arnold-layne]

Hi!! I recently found you through a friend’s recommendation, and I absolutely love your work! So I was wondering if you had any recommendations of your fics? Cause they’re just so good and there’s a lot of them I just don’t know where to start!

aw thank you so much! also you should high five your friend, they have good taste 🤭

recommendations... well, i love all my children equally but some of them are better fit to start with than the others

many know my work by my three-year-lasting epic pirate au in darkness shall you be reborn, which i recommend reading on ao3 because i haven't updated the masterlist in quite a while. it's pretty indicative of my style and preferences and even shows my craft progress through the years

then there is we, the psychos, which has been going on since 2019 and which i recently picked up again. apart from ch. 1 & 2 it's all been written over the last month so like, the latest, the freshest of my writing

another pretty recent work is as we were falling, which i only posted to tumblr and not ao3. i wrote it in the middle of a writing block and the quality is not that good but it's a decent wip that i hope to continue

if you want a finished fic, then i have only one suggestion for you, and it's ex malo bonum. written pretty long ago in mania-like state over a month. it's pretty old and many forgot about it which i think is unfair it's pretty good

not sure if you want any of my original works, but just in case you do, here's my recent sci-fi short story Bloodeaters

and of course i can't forget the fic that still gets me the majority of "please update" comments, What Is Lost, What Is Found. it's my first real attempt at english writing, and it will probably show, but people love it

now we're getting deeper in arnold lore. i'm an avid fan of red dead redemption 2, which brought yall this fic: the wild, the wayward and the wicked. still hope to come back to it at some point

im also an even more avid fan of the fallout franchise, which, by analogy, birthed this fic: war?

the rest of my writing are mostly oneshots and sketches, and you can find most of them on my masterlist. it hasn't been updated in a while but i seem to have covered the major changes