#i have too many feelings

[iwantoceans]

Love wins all

[yeonbam]

Broke my own heart realising that these two scenes can be juxtaposed next to each other as the dream vs. the reality.

I was wondering why they made the colours and lighting in ep. 6 so much like it’s out of a daydream, a fairytale even, and turns out it is to point out what lies between "promise not to leave me until I've achieved my dream" and being forced to give up on the dream and the promise because "things have changed".

So the mirroring that takes place in ep. 7 is not inside a warm little home while their pinkies are linked into a promise, but under the cold, semi-darkness of a hospital while ama lies between life and death. Jack was forced to sell the last bit of his freedom to Boss.

In that dream, everything was working in their favour— Jack’s debt was about to be paid off, his goals were closer to being achieved and he found his soulmate, tied to him in ways he never realised. In that dream, Joke had something close to a family for the first time, something close to a lover, and a place that wanted him as much as he wanted it.

But once awake in this cold dark world, they are both alone against the world again. For people like Jack, things like promise, love, and dreams can become a luxury in a matter of moments and no matter how hard he works to fix things it’s like undoing knots that go so far back, freedom is but a distant hope like a fever dream. And for Joke who dreamt of living in a different life— he is back to having no one to sit and have dinner with and no single place to sleep at night and no one who wants him.  

[awkwardly-anxious-latte]

SPOILERS FOR FANTASY HIGH JUNIOR YEAR: THE LAST STAND

Whatever you do don’t think about how desperately the bad kids tried to take Buddy with them

Don’t think about Buddy Dawn, unable to be resurrected at this moment, laying there surrounded by the corpses of monsters and without a friend

Don’t think about him going to Heaven and maybe having questions for Helio, receiving the same bullshit response that Kristen got

And maybe he’s okay with that. He’s in Heaven, he doesn’t think it’s his place to question his God, it’s all God’s plan. Or maybe this was a plot he was a part of for some reason and he knows he’ll be fine.

But maybe not. Maybe he’s been betrayed in a new place by people who he was a placeholder for. Maybe he’s desperate to know why Kristen was chosen, someone who lost faith, and not him who kept his belief. Maybe he’s lost.

(And then, coming back and hoping for some comfort from his family and they all say not to question Helio’s will. That he died and came back so it doesn’t matter. Don’t think about how lost a boy could be seeing his family choose religion over him)

[andrej-delany]

Leo & Vincent looking at their Adams

[fortunatelychaoticphantom]

It is 2024, and I just read the Shadow and Bone trilogy for the first time in about a week. I am not okay.

[stellarsage]

Very proud of my babygirl for reaching 100 000 000+ streams !! 💚🖤

So I did a little sketch when I saw his story 😭😭😭 He is the best fr I love him so much

[mishalikessoundsandcolours]

I love this song so much!! It's a really nice tribute to Syd and Rick's own feelings towards him and the loss of him are much more obvious here than they are in the Wish You Were Here album, which was also about Syd, but rather from Roger's perspective – the emotions in this song are just so pure. I also like how the flute kinda reminds of The Piper At The Gates Of Dawn (idk if that was intentional, but it does sound like that to me). Well, the whole album is beautiful and worth listening to.

[its-alittleobsessed]

Sometimes i get so excited to read a specific fanfiction that i cant even open it

[justjesse116]

I've been seeing a lot of "If Dabi dies it'll be a mercy" lately, and I have some Feelings™.

For the record, my blog is essentially Daddy Issues Central, so I feel like I'm uniquely qualified to weigh in on this situation.

But that's neither here or there, so;

On the one hand, I'm sure Dabi DOES in fact want to live, but wants and needs are different, yes? Would death really be a mercy? That depends. He needs help, REAL help. And that road is a long and winding thing. But I believe in my innermost heart that he'd have the support he needs. If I ever thought my sibling was dead, but then they popped up a decade later, even if they had committed horrible crimes I legitimately believe that I'd give them another chance. And the same with my mother. For all the crime shows she watches, she always says that she'd turn me in, but I honestly doubt she would, and even if she did I think she'd stand by me. There's something about being the first child, your mothers 'first baby'. There has only been a couple times my mother has called me her first baby, but it is never a pretty thing. It's heart wrenching, every time she's called me that it's been voice cracking, heart breaking situations. And every time I look at Dabi, I can almost hear Rei's voice, cracking, "my first baby." I refuse to believe his mother and siblings would abandon him, I reject that possibility absolutely.

And that's not even taking The League into account, because whether you like it or not, Dabi cares about all of them in some way. My whole point being; Dabi has a lot more people who care about him than he thinks, which seems to be a common theme with people who have a low self-worth.

So there's that, now on to the less pleasant side of things. So; would death REALLY be a mercy? And that's the million dollar question, isn't it? Unfortunately, I believe without a shadow of a doubt that Dabi couldn't possibly be happier than if he burned himself alive, taking everyone he wanted with him. I think he truly believes death is the only option, because he's been so miserable, so hurt for a full fucking decade at this point, he just wants it to end. When you've been so thoroughly rejected and neglected by someone who is literally 50% of your life, that hurt never goes away. Then factor in that someone believes their entire family is the same, you've got a recipe for disaster. And whether or not that's the 'good' or 'right' decision, it doesn't change the fact that it's a very human response to perceived rejection. Just because it isn't 'actually' real doesn't mean it doesn't feel VERY real to whoever it is happening to.

So I guess at the end of all this, I say what Dabi really wants is a 50 / 50 shot. Unsatisfying, I'm sure. But I really do think he feels both ways.

But I do need to add in that I NEED this God damn singed fucker to live, because if he dies not only is it going to be thematically awful for him and Shouto, but I personally will never recover.

As sad as it is, this ridiculous fictional character was the only thing that made me realize that I was fixating on my own sperm donor (who I haven't spoken to in over a decade) and that I need to GET A GRIP and fucking move on.

That's the main reason I need Todoroki Touya to live, because I'm selfish and sad and I need to see that he can live through this hell. Because if he can do it maybe I can do it too.

[heavens-bookshop]

Oh my god I have so many emotions rn.

Aziraphale has always wanted to do Good in the world. One of the through lines for this season was how powerless he felt during his time on Earth - with Job, with Elspeth and Morag, to a lesser extent with Nina and Maggie. He and Crowley witness so much suffering over the millennia, and he just wants - he needs - to help.

But he also needs to believe that Heaven wants to help. Because if Heaven aren't the good guys, what does that say about him?

And then the Apocalypse starts, and Aziraphale realises he loves the Earth and the life he made there, and Heaven doesn't actually care, so he fights. But he and Crowley also fight, because they don't understand how the other is feeling.

Crowley is scared, desperate to keep him and Aziraphale safe, so his plan is to get them both as far away from Earth as possible. But that hurts Aziraphale because from his view point, Crowley just wants to give up. After everything they've witnessed together!

Aziraphale is scared, and desperately clings to the idea that Heaven still wants to help, so his plan is to get both of them under Heavenly protection - which is why he keeps bringing up the whole "you were an angel once" notion. Not because he particularly wants Crowley to be an angel, but because it would be a way they could be safe and together and it wouldn't be against the rules. But that hurts Crowley because being an angel or a demon just isn't the point to him, and he thought that, after everything, Aziraphale might have realised that.

The Apocalypse doesn't happen, and they can breathe, but they also still don't talk about their feelings so they still fundamentally misunderstand each other.

When the Metatron offers Aziraphale a promotion, he initially balks. He even states outright that he doesn't want to return to Heaven. But then the Metatron goes for Aziraphale's weakness - Crowley. There is an offer on the table that will allow he and Crowley to be together, to be safe, and to do it by the rules.

And this is why Aziraphale is excited. He has an opportunity to help, to actually do something about all the suffering he's witnessed (or at least the Metatron has convinced him that's the case), and he can do it with Crowley.

And here is where their misunderstanding culminates.

Aziraphale thinks he's found a perfect way for them to be a force for good - after everything he and Crowley have seen, of course he'd want to be at his side helping. More importantly, if Crowley is an angel again then there's nothing to be scared of at all, they can be safe and together.

Because another through line in this season is how terrified all the angels are of not being Good. We see it when Aziraphale and Crowley first meet as angels, where he gets increasingly more nervous the more Crowley questions things. We see it after the Job incident, where Aziraphale breaks down when he thinks he's been condemned to Hell. We see it when Muriel freaks out after realizing they've been helping Crowley, when Uriel asks the Metatron if they've done something wrong. They're terrified, and even after making his own way, Aziraphale can't shake that old habit.

He doesn't even feel safe in the bookshop. When Maggie and Nina ask him why there are so many fire extinguishers in the shop, Aziraphale alludes to the fire, and seems to almost dissociate for a second before pushing through it. And of course, Hell came for them anyway.

To Aziraphale, returning to Heaven makes sense as the safest option.

Of course, that hurts Crowley, because he can't understand why he's bending over backwards to placate a family that treated him terribly. Crowley clearly holds a lot of resentment for the way Aziraphale was treated by Heaven. More than that, though, Crowley thought that perhaps Aziraphale had realised being an angel or a demon didn't matter, but it would seem that Aziraphale needs him to be an angel to consider keeping him around.

That's not what Aziraphale meant, and he can't understand why Crowley isn't grabbing the chance to make a difference, and - more importantly - the chance for them to be safe.

So now Crowley has to make his confession - his attempt at putting his heart on his sleeve. Except that now, to Aziraphale, it just sounds like a ploy to get him to leave Earth, just like when he wanted them to run off to Alpha Centauri. It sounds like he just wants them to give up again. And that hurts.

And then Crowley kisses him! And for Crowley, it's a combination of "I truly am putting everything on the line here" and "this is my last chance" and for one second Aziraphale melts into it, before fear sets in, and some anger, because to him it feels like Crowley did it just to get him to abandon Heaven.

They both just are fundamentally at different places and completely misunderstand what the other is feeling. And it's fucking HEARTBREAKING.

They need to communicate and they need to finally understand what is in the other's heart. They love each other, and they need each other, and holy fuck I need season 3 like yesterday. Thank you for coming to my TED talk.

[disasterbuck]

fhkdjshfsjkghfesjkfhesjkgfhse

GUYS!!!!

I just finished reading my bestie Veronae's latest buddie fic and it's SO FREAKING GOOD I CAN'T EVEN!!!!!!!!

I HAVE A FANFIC HANGOVER NOW!!!!

but it's not on ao3 yet because V still has to edit it so I can't link it for you but AS SOON AS IT GOES UP I SWEAR I WILL GIVE YOU GUYS THE LINK!!!!!!!!!!!

[anotherferalrat]

TELL ME WHY.

IM CRYING OVER A FUCKIN DRAGON.

AND SOME BITCH NAMED HAT GUY???

[temporary-tats]

Don’t mind me just crying over the Bumbleby confession again <3

[chronicrabbit]

Home Coming

Part 1

Thinking of Steve Harrington, post season one beat-down and Demogorgon encounter, returning to his house to see the rare sight of his mothers car parked in the driveway.

He only hesitates for a moment before he walks in, spotting his mother at the dining table.

She looked so out of place, unnatural, back ramrod straight and legs crossed at the knee in a chair she’d picked out herself but had never broken in.

She was pretending to read her crisp, - unopened-, copy of Jane Eyre, the spine creaking too loudly with every page turn.

Her expression was pinched in the way it got when she had something to say, some reprimand she was doing her best to puzzle through, words rearranging for maximum devastation upon delivery.

That was her specialty, after all. Words of harsh judgment disguised as concern.

She finally glanced up when he’d been staring for long enough, smoothing her immaculately styled hair down with freshly manicured nails as she fixed him with a look that made him wish he’d stayed at the hospital.

“Where’s dad?” he tried for casual, apparently missing by a mile.

“Steven,” she spoke cooly, rose painted lips downturned, blue eyes boring into him like tent spikes.

He straightened.

“Your father received a call from Officer Callahan. Would you care to explain?”

Steve tried to stay still; tried not to shift or shuffle nervously on his feet.

He knew his mother hated that.

“I…” he cleared his throat, still scratchy from screaming, though it’d been hours since the last time he had.

He squared his shoulders and took a deep breath.

This was his mother, after all, not an interdimensional monster.

“It was my fault.”

One perfectly plucked eyebrow rose, the small simple gesture communicating more than words ever could.

It was a clear and unarguable “go on”.

So he did.

He told almost the full story; spotting Nancy with Jonathan, Tommy’s little art piece on the cinema marquee, the fight.

He stopped at arriving to the Byers’ place to apologise, the words catching in his throat like Laffy Taffy in molars as she raised a hand, her lips pressed into a thin pale line.

The displeasure roiled off of her in waves.

“So,” she started, pulling the ribbon attached to the spine of the book in between the crisp, too-white pages to hold her place, though he was absolutely certain she wouldn’t be picking it up again.

She glanced up at him, large blue eyes scanning his face, flitting over the evidence of his fight.

He could fool himself into believing she was concerned, worried, even.

But then she’d spoken again, and all those thoughts were undoubtedly dashed.

“You‘ll take full responsibility for this?”

Steve’s brow furrowed in confusion, and he flinched as a newly formed scab pulled at the throbbing skin above his eye, threatening to bleed once more.

“I… what?”

His mother huffed, adjusting the collar of her soft pink blouse, smoothing out invisible wrinkles.

“The marquee, Steven. Dean Hughs said it was stained and that he expected money for a new one.”

Steve’s stomach dropped.

“Oh…” he let out weakly, ignoring the burn of his scraped up knuckles as he shoved his hands in his pockets, the ache in his head that’d been persistent since Jonathan had clocked him, the heat of tears prickling behind his eyes, threatening to spill.

“Since you admit to your part in it, we’ll be taking the money from your allowance. The Hagan’s are doing the same with Tommy.”

Steve found himself nodding, though it felt like his head was underwater.

“I expect you to apologise to your father when he gets home,” she continued with that same cold and impersonal tone he’d grown to expect.

To dread.

“You have no idea how embarrassing it was to be the last to find out about your little brush with vandalism. I mean, really Steven? We leave for a month, and you’re already falling into delinquency? Next we hear you’ve been hanging around the trailer park with the rest of the flea bitten trash, like the Curtis’s, or, Heaven forbid, that Munson boy-“

Steve tuned out his mother, his shoulders sagging, his heart sinking, his eyes stinging.

She hadn’t even asked him if he was ok.

She hadn’t said a word about the blood that stained his shirt, the bruises and cuts pounded into his flesh, the unsteadiness of his hands.

She didn’t seem to notice the nervous set of his shoulders, the bags under his eyes, the brand new terror etched into his very being.

She didn’t care.

And he should’ve known, really.

After a lifetime of criticism, of admonition instead of praise, of:

“Steven, stop ruining your brand new pants!”

Instead of

“Great job on that home run!”

Of

“You can do better.”

Instead of

“Thank you for trying.”

He wanted to run.

He had nowhere to go, so he stayed and waited out his mothers rant with his head bowed and his eyes damp.

When she had finally finished, she sat back in the chair and sighed as if her speech had taken it out of her; as if she were the one who was hurting.

She let her eyes sweep over him once more, her regal nose scrunching in distaste at his less than perfect appearance.

“Get cleaned up and throw away those ruined clothes. And if I see any stains in my couch or on my hardwood, you’ll be grounded for a week.”

With that, she waved her hand to dismiss him and turned back to her book, not opening it, just staring at its unblemished cover with a complete lack of interest.

A painfully familiar expression.

Steve did as he was told.

He grabbed the first aid kit, a bit understocked from the time he’d injured himself at basketball practice two months prior, and did what he could to treat his own wounds.

After, he sat alone in his bedroom, lights on, window open, spiked bat resting at his bedside within reach.

He pinched at the bridge of his nose; tried not to cry.

Harringtons didn’t cry.

He thought about the Byers; about Ms. Byers allowing the entire town to think she’d gone insane in her efforts to recover her son.

He thought about Jonathan, and how goddamn lucky he was to have a mom like that.

One who didn’t care about her reputation, her spotless image. One who loved wholeheartedly and unselfishly.

One who would see his pain and embrace him, wipe away his tears and ask if he was alright.

He thought of Nancy.

Maybe he could call her?

He glanced to the clock radio on his nightstand.

03:30 AM.

It was no good.

He didn’t fall asleep that night, every creak of a floorboard or shift in the air sending him into high alert.

He wrapped himself in his blanket, one hand out and resting on the handle of his bat, and thought:

“At least I’m not alone.”

[perpetual-state-of-confusion]

I try to get my thoughts in order with the new Vega vid and I can't because every time I try, I just become

[hers-underwraps]

Barnacles for the character opinion bingo :3

OH CAPTAIN MY CAPTAIN 💕

He looks so edible man.

I have so many headcannons about him and I love him and he’s so cool but at the same time I want to bully him and throw him against the wall

He’s such a sweetie bear with deep lord and a doofus at the same time

Also I am a BIG fan of the headcannon that barnacles is a bigger guy/ a lil chubby

(Lowkey so conflicted about designs for him, part of me wants to give him the beard and shaggy man pony and all but the evil part of me wants to make him have a buzz cut and look like Luther from the umbrella academy (which makes more sense to me cause he use to be on scouts and he seems like a practical guy to have a more clean look). OR working with both, he used have like a more clean hairstyle but taking care of his kids crew lead him to the more outgrown style)

Thanks for the ask!!