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#i have no math this year and i already dont like it
rose022 · 9 months
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i wish there was a place where i could continue to learn like math science english and history but like. no deadlines for work. like work still exists but its optional and the deadlines are flexible. but i still get to learn! i wanna learn soooo bad!!!!
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unforth · 9 months
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I know the Musk "trillion people means more Mozarts" thing is stupid as fuck but I just saw a prominent blogger reply to it by saying anyone has the ability to be a Mozart and I'm sorry but "talent doesn't exist" discourse has officially gone too far, and I say that as someone who hates the word "talent" and has replaced it almost entirely with the word "skill" in my vocabulary.
Not everyone is a prodigy. Yes, prodigies get lost because they lack opportunity, but that still doesn't mean everyone is a prodigy. If everyone WAS then everyone with enough wealth and opportunity WOULD be and like. I'm sorry, have you SEEN what a fucking moron Elon Musk actually is?
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br1ghtestlight · 4 months
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im at a 1st grade math level and im genuinely sooo terrified for when i have to take math classes to get my GED. i know theyre not gonna throw me in the deep end with complex algebra equations but im just so fucking Bad at math. they did everything they could in high school to teach me but there was nothing they could do, they put me in the extremely basic remedial math classes w/ five other troublemakers who couldnt do basic multiplication and i failed that too. like what are we even supposed to do here. can i get a medical exemption?? do they just kill me?
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opens-up-4-nobody · 8 months
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#love that my body decided to incapacitate me the weekend before i have to read 5 different papers for classes#and it would b one thing to just read them but no for 3 of them i have to give detailed interpretation and 1 i have to present on#ive already failed to read one bc i forgot we had to do 2 papers for monday. oops. not that i could have done it anyway. i barely got 1 done#and im on track to fucking up the one due Tomorrow as well#im just fucking tired of reading fucking chemistry driven papers that i dont understand no matter how many times i read them#and everyones like oh itll get easier but no it fucking wont bc i cant fucking read right#its so fucking frustrating. why do i even bother? im so tried#i don't even have the paper im supposed to present on so ill have to do it all tomorrow. cool. great. not that i could do it today anyway#im just. this is gonna b a difficult week#and i misused my whole day by doing extractions bc i scheduled my training a week ago when i thought i would b fine over the weekend#nope. its fucking bullshit. this is y im like. y do i even want to b in academia?#how could i b a prof if i cant read well? its fine to b dyslexic as a math person but im like i have to read so much and so little gets thru#but then what the fuck else am i supposed to do? idk. im just gonna write down something for all these questions and go tf to sleep#ill get up at some horrible time in the morning to finish this. damn the consequences. ill see my therapist tomorrow anyway#and meet with my advisor like 🤪 yo guess what i made zero progress this week#sorry u got stuck with me while im going thru a year of fucking health problems#but whatever cant get rid of me now im already here. here and tired and i wanna go to bed#unrelated
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immamapletreekid · 5 months
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work anxiety starting before work itself hahahahaahahahahahahhhaha
#IM BAKCIJ THE FUCKIGN BUIDLIGN .AGAIN. AUSUSUXHEHWHGLHKF#im grateful i have an internship for this summer with the way the job market is like currently.#im grateful that i have the opportunity to lessen the burden on my parents shoulders. im grateful that this job can pay rent and groceries#and tuition for a few terms im grateful i get to gain experience while still in school that will hekp me in the future#IM GRATEFUL FOR ALL THIS!!!!! BUT STILL I FUCLING HATE EVERYTHJGN#i hate being unable to eat anything ir sleep at night bc all i can think about is shit i have work tomorrow i have to email this guy and#finish these tasks and impress my manager and be approachable and enthusiastic and eager to learn and not make any mistakes#and not fail anything bc im getting graded on this its alwags grades its always the fucking grades#isnt it. it was the grades that had me crying on walks home from school when i was 9 and it was grades that made me waste away 9th grade#it was grades that made me unable to stomach anything during weeks with tests and it was and is still grades that#dictate every single fucking part of my life#and even tho the ppl who used to yell at me for getting a B in math in 5th grade are no longer yelling at me for getting 60s in linear algeb#ra and stats and calculus and cs#haha.ha when ur university is famous for its.. horribly high suicdie rates#i find that the yelling comes from me now. ive replaced the adults who would sit beside me at the dinner table#yelling bc yea guess what 8 year old me didnt understand division at first#god i hate this school so much. i hate what im studying im gratefula nd am so privileged to be ahle to further my educarion and receive#all these experiences mot everyone can have but god everytime i return to the city where the school is#i feel like throwing up and sobbing and just never ipening my eyes again#haha yea. i hope i csn get a job to support myself in the future#i hope i can still have time for hobbies#why si everyone at school so good at everything#ive met more people who have passed their rcm 10 and arct exams for piano than those who havent#i have classes with people who have already published research papers with professors in the states#my classmates can breeze through a cs assignment while still playing fir varisty teams. working out everyday. goijg ti parties.#eating and cooking balsnced meals each week. having a social life..the whole combo#meanwhile i get overwhelmed because i have to respond to an email and finish an assignment in one day#how do i become like them#why was this about work anxiety at first and why is it about the eternal imposter syndrome and lack of self confidence#i just want money man... i dont give a shit about snything anymore
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silverislander · 5 months
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people smarter than me have said this before but jesus christ why does every job seem to require at least a year of experience and a degree in some hyperspecific field. where did the entry level positions go? how am i even supposed to get experience if none of yall will give me a job without it?
#theres already almost nothing related to my field being offered but even the unrelated things that i think i could try are out bc of this#most of the stuff id actually care abt doing actually require 3-5+yrs! in a field that i cant get into without experience i cant get!#and people talk abt how 'nobody wants to work' i am BEGGING you for a job. literally begging (cover letters).#im coming to the horrifying realization that its possible Nothing i have done w my entire life matters. i have nothing useful#i really feel like i made a mistake. that cant be the best five years of my life i wasnt even happy during most of them#i applied to six jobs weeks ago and ive heard back from one of them and it was a rejection. and theres nothing else to apply to#my degree isnt helping and all of my hobbies are useless. why am i only good at/passionate abt arts. why not math or smth instead#i should have just done ece like i was planning to instead of my honours. what was even the point#and im watching other people in my year get great jobs right out of university. watching my BROTHER get offered work on a silver platter#hes 19 and got five different offers + didnt apply people just asked him to work for them. second year in a row this has happened#hes never had to work for minimum wage. hes always had a good job in his field lined up anytime he wants to work and it always pays well#and i finished five years and ive had to beg for everything ive ever gotten and its still not enough to count for anything#im proud of him but fuck it stings a little#levi.txt#vent tw#oh right i forgot i should just walk in and shake the managers hand. /right/. and they will simply give me a job on the spot bc of this#if people whove been working the same job since before 1990 dont fucking stop giving me bad advice istfg#and these same people say nepotism isnt real and in the same breath talk abt giving their nephew a summer job at their company#literally all i want is work i can be decent at that i care abt and making a living wage. it doesnt have to be fun i dont want to be rich#i just want to do an ok job feel like my work matters and make enough to start my life. thats all
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dandyshucks · 9 months
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I WANNA BE A JANITORRRR
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july-19th-club · 9 months
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one thing about getting sick for me is that before covid (the first time) my colds and flus and whatnot all went in a very specific pattern: i would get a sore throat for a day or two, then violently congested for three or four days, then a runny nose/drainage for three or four days after that, and finally a cough, which was my favorite part of the cold (if a person can be said to have a favorite part of a cold) because it meant it was almost over AND that the problem was largely not in my face and neck anymore. but any illness i've had since that first covid has been all over the map - either i don't get the sore throat at all, just straight into the congestion, or the sore throat happens at a different time, or longer, or worse, or i have to spit a lot because otherwise i get so nauseous from sinus drainage that i throw up, or the congestion and the runny nose happen concurrently with not just each other but ALSO the sore throat (which is what's happening right now and i hate it) and like. because it doesn't follow the pattern i spent twenty-six years of my life getting used to, i'm always freaked out. which i would be anyway because ever since i had the first covid getting sick freaks me out. and it should freak more people out if im being honest. but this is a weird one bc like. i dont know how it did that but it disrupted MY trusty sick pattern
#i say 'first covid' because even though both rapid tests were negative yesterday there's a high likelihood they were false negatives#the most likely explanation is 'my brother brought covid to christmas and three days later i also got covid'#a perfectly reasonable chain of logic that my family refuses to entertain because it would make it His Fault#and nobody wants to blame mister perfect#he's my brother and i mostly love him. but the thing with him and me is that he's two years younger than me but has always had an energy of#i dont know. maturity? know-it-all-ness which comes off as maturity? emotional stoicism? < thats it probably right there#i was always a very emotional child. and undiagnosedly autistic. so he is in some ways the eldest child. and i resent it#like. we all know he's NOT the eldest. but he takes charge of things like he thinks he is. and when i take charge of things i am...#not authoritative#anyway he's the engineer and emotionally stoic and can 'beat' any problem by simply glaring at it hard enough (he thinks) and he's like#the oldest son. and i think somewhere back in the family hindbrain where they'd never recognize or admit it . that holds weight#oldest son holds just SLIGHTLY more weight than oldest daughter#although. had i been born a boy and been exactly the same personality-wise as i am already. he would still be like this#and we would still have this uncomfortable dynamic#anyway mister special can't get anybody sick and it's probably not his fault because i come into contact with people all the time!#sure. at my much more secure workplace where i spend less than five minutes with most patrons. and a lot more people mask#versus . him a foot away from me at the dinner table sniffling into his ham. hmmmmmm. you're an engineer. you do the math
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mistninja · 1 year
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every day i ask myself "should i quit uni" and every day i stop myself from posting it as a tumblr poll. but its getting harder
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cupuasu · 1 year
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was looking at the school systems in latin america and i think our ministries of education should come together n decide some sort of standard fr bc what a mess
#if they could come together to make our car plate look the same ugly ass shit they should come together to do something useful as well#they should copy paste whatever finland is smoking for basic school n then steal whatever cuba is doing in high education#me personally if i could choose i'd divide the basic years in 4 phases#first (til 4yo) second (til 8yo) third (til 12yo) fourth (16yo)#which is similar to what we have but its divided evenly now. also they should make the school hours shorter#no fucking person should be sitting in a chair for over 6h#three months of vacation is a perfect number to be honest (december january july)#oh n we should actually have decent extracurricular activities OR we should b able 2 choose the classes we need#sure make a standard curriculum for ppl who dont know what theyre doing w their life but also let the rest of us bitches choose#i DID NOT need that many chemistry or biology classes. i was not interested then and im not interested now#and also that insane amount of math classes was unnecessary too. even if i use math in uni now#a perfect curriculum for me would be 25% language 25% history + geography 25% math 10% art or PE 5% sciences#these bitches had me doing 40% math 40% portuguese 20% all sciences + random philosophy#oh n while i think a test to get into university is good it should not be like a straight line bc every student is different#for example when i did ENEM the first time i was baffled on how insane the math and sciences part were#(i love the language history and geography part tho) like i think we should also be able to choose that#like when we sign up we say what uni and course we wanna take and then do a test that has nothing to do with it#we should be able to get a personalized test from the already existing database. for example#if im going to do architecture then my test needs more math physics and history. but not as much language geography and fuckass chemistry#even though i LOVE language and geography#wait this rant went too personal already. anyway change the schooling system#and also fix the way teachers are being taught to teach and also pay them better and fund better infrastructure#cos literally til when are politicians gonna put the tax money up their ass? girl you cant even give 30% to education? kill yourself <3#the way latin america will be stuck in the lower top 50 in education for the next decades is crazy
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Having an incredibly generic name is both a blessing and a curse because on one hand it's always confusing when people have the same name and there's always jokes about how I must be in the witness projection program or something but on the other hand in the increasing loss of privacy via the internet and the worrying lack of anonymity for people online anymore means that I am near impossible to find online.
I could post my full legal name online (I wouldn't I'm not an idiot) and no one could dox me because there are thousands of people with my exact name. Hell I could even give a general location to where I live and people would still struggle to find me because it's a major metropolitan area with millions of people living there. There's been a moderately famous person in the last 2 decades with my exact same first and last name (I've had people get confused and think my middle name is the same as the famous person's. It's not. It's another generic name.) Any future employer running a scan on me online better hire a private investigator because I'm near impossible to find. Not because I'm super off the grid or anything, but mainly because my legal name is one of the most generic placeholder names available and to try to find me through all of the other random people is a Herculean task
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sludgeguzzler · 3 months
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Reaaally missed the ball with studying this semester, I'm probably failing multiple classes. Worst part is I can't find it in me to give a shit. Like I know it's bad and I know if I put in a little work id be doing fine but I don't want to put the work bc I don't see a point in learning any of this anymore which is not helping my case at all
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woahajimes · 2 years
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im gonna cry
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swagging-back-to · 2 years
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also the people who keep telling me to go to collge are miserably obnoxious. according to my GED tests im already college level in every single subject. in reading and science i had the highest score possible. everything else was one point below the maximum score. going to college is a waste of my time, literally.
#this isnt a brag post this is a rant post#why the fuck would i torture myself with college when im already comparable to a college graduate#i dont need a stupid piece of paper#like seriously even in math im comparable to college students. i got 5 less than the maximum score in math. my absolute weakest subjuct#is 5 points below maximum scores. I LITERALLY DO NOT NEED COLLEGE. the people who work there and conduct the tests#DID go to college and they all told me they scored considerably less than me. a few of them said they barely scored passing scores.#So the people who graduate could possibly and are literally worse off than i am.#why. why would i waste 4+ years of my life and potentially hundres of thousands of dollars and make myself miserably#miserable****#just shut up#every single time you fuckers tell me to go to college i am more and more convinced it's a waste of my time#and no i dont need to have a specific occupation title in mind for me to be successful. it's called being flexible#if i dont take up the jobs available i will starve. taking whatever job i can is better than waiting around for the world to give you every#thing on a silver platter. like seriously shut up you sound so entilted and ignorant to the realities of REALITY.#my entire fucking life it has been nothfing but people hounding me over college. LITERALLY since i was 5 fucking years old.#they had us write college essays for scholarships in second grade.#every field trip was to a college. we went to easily every single college in the state at least once.#every single fucking time i hated it more and more and i wanted to go less and less.#it enrages me. it makes me shake with hatred. it is such a fucking scam and yet everyone does free fucking advertising for it#why the FUCK do you give a SINGLE SHIT about what i choose to do or not to do in terms of collge. why the FUCK do you assume#that college is feasible for everyone in any way. (finacially emotionally physically etc etc) just fuck off serious fucking ly#rant#college is a scam#anti college
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silverislander · 1 year
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genuinely crying rn bc my shakespeare prof emailed me to say he thinks i could do grad studies in english and asked whether i've considered an honours degree 👍
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tiredeyes1975 · 2 years
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ive been so stressed about college recently ….
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