#i have good friends in my dorm
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cant stop thinkin bout charles and erik readin together on the couch but instead of reading with him charles is listening to eriks thoughts while he reads. Live mind commentary ……..
#xmen#cherik#charles xavier#erik lehnsherr#snap chats#the rare time i post an idea of mine only because i really cant think of a way id draw this#usually i hoard my ideas cause i like surprising you guys but this aint really one i feel like drawing so. For You my friends#like i COULD but. idk just isnt particularly something im itching to draw it just seems cute#but anyways no chat let me cook alright hear me out cause i talk in my brain all the time while i read#sometimes i stop reading just to think about a bit i read yeah#i want charles to listen in on all of eriks side comments or observations he makes while reading something#like if he wanted to charles could read the whole book in less than five minutes- maybe shorter than that#and that aint fun that aint cool …. so time for Audible: Husband Edition. With Commentary#ITD BE SO COZY just hangin out by the fireplace …. maybe its snowin outisde … if snow even exists anymore atp#a light fire cracklin and the study SEEMS totally quiet otherwise and yet…..#charles has been locked in to erik’s off-the-cuff literary analysis and mild comments for the past twenty minutes. its simple but its bliss#charles doesnt have to worry about being seen as invasive .. he doesnt have to suppress his powers …#the rare occasion erik lets charles into his mind for somethin so innocent .. ive made myself sick i fear#see now i wanna try writing a fic but 1.) have written in years 2.) id have to really think hard on how erik would commentate on a book#hm…… actually i do wonder what erik’s commentary on The Fable of the Bees would be …..#IN ANY CASE. maybe - at the very least- i can draw cherik by the fireplce someday ….#thatd be cute … hm …. depends on if i get in the mood for it down the line#anyways i have to drive back to my dorm !!! boo !!!! so good night everyone !!!!!
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(redraw of last year's art!) happy new year 2024, everyone! hopefully things go well this year, too :]
[ 2023 version | 2025 version ]
#thomas the tank engine#thomas and friends#ttte lady#ttte diesel 10#ttte thomas#ttte percy#casa tidmouth#senjart#this year has been quite tough! phew#started off the year studying my butt off for entrance exams#ended the year studying my butt off for med school's first semester finals#I'm so busy!!! so many organizations and meetings to attend!!! workloads and labworks too!!!!#ntm I got hit with a wave of mental health stuff so that depleted my motivation too.....#things are kind of tough for me now but hopefully I can get myself back on track#because I have lots of stuff to draw!!! many gazillion ideas!!!!#and I hope YOU too will have a good year!!!!!#also looking at the tags on last year's art and LOL'd.... my years living at the dorms was truly something (negative connotation)
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(╥﹏╥)
#We've had our yearly secret santa gifts exchange at my dorm and I've been gifted the first volume of Beast 😭😭😭😭😭#I'm crying forever. This december marks three years since I've watched the first b/sd episode#and yet this is the first time I actually own a b/sd manga volume. Like I own it and I can read it whenever I want!!! How cool is that!!!!!#Like there's so many Akutagawa images in it!!!! It's insane!!!!!!!! AND IT'S BEAST AT THAT#I'm deeply moved because I never spoke about it to virtually anyone here (at my dorm)?#Like I suppose a bunch of people vaguely know I like anime but only a couple of close friends know I like. Like-like reading manga lol.#And the person who gifted it DEFINITELY didn't know I like anime in general much less b/sd specifically much less Beast in particular!!!!!#I'm 100% sure (they just arrived this year and we hadn't even had that much occasions to talk to each other).#Which means they went through the trouble of gathering intel from my close friends about what I like and actually follow through‚#seek for the specific manga in a comic store etc... It's such a nice gesture I'm so heartwarmed.#And of course I'm glad for every gift I've received in the last years (genuinely)‚ but the fact that this was the most *specific* to what–#I like. It makes it so special! They were so kind.#There must be one (1) person in this whole 60 people dorm who knows I like Beast–#(that would be the girl who introduced b/sd to me in the first place) and the fact that they asked them for it...#I feel both very grateful and lucky lol#When I unwrapped it!!! Like I thought it was just a random book which would have been nice but like!!!!!#When I actually saw through the thin paper the cover!!!! The scream I screamed in my head#Anyways!!!! I own a b/sd manga now!!!!! I've only got time to go through the first chapter so far but it's suchhhh an experience.#It's like reading it for the first time again 😭😭😭 Half because the translation is so much different than the English one lol.#And I basically know the English version by heart. Half because I never saw this kind of high quality!!!!! It's!!!!! Insane!!!!! Like!!!!!!#I'm crying 😭😭😭 The drawings are so sharp and crisp (in the good way). The lines are so clean there's no disturbance at all#I literally never saw anything so good in my life I'm crying a little. I'm so so glad they blessed me with Beast specifically#The takebon edition is pretty cheap (it's just planet manga so there's no color illustrations or dust cover or anything unfortunatelly.#But to make up for it the volumes are significantly cheaper then let's say J-Pop)#There's also some unique typesetting choices? The text from the book-like boxes is in lowercase which is interesting!#Initially I thought I wouldn't have liked the translation (opening it randomly there was Akutagawa saying “crepa!” (“die!”) to Dazai in ch1#Which was kinda jarring since it's very low register and everyone knows Akutagawa has very complex speech patterns.)#But actually reading it I'm really enjoying the translation so far!!!!#There's so many choices that made me grasp details I actually missed all the times I've read the English translation.#That is to say! Very excited to read it!!!! Will probably make a review / translation commentary if I can find the time!!!!!
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Masters' Academy AU: Student Extra.
Art by @okkennymay
#masters’ academy au#okkennymay#this guy and the redhead are my favorites#not even close#the junior students could get put to use on a few good ways#I'd planned for Dipper to have skipped a grade coming here going straight to the 8th grade#and he's already mr “look how much smarter I am than the other kids” so he doesn't really want to hang out with the juniors#but the juniors are his age and it's their first year at the school too so he's got a lot to relate with there#plus the 8th graders in his class are intimidating (and tall)#course the dorms have kids from different grades anyways so it won't be some huge deal if Dipper has friends in 7th and 8th#really they're all middle schoolers and none of the high school kids give a shit about them XD#course I've waffled A LOT about their exact ages and grade because it's such an important decision#considered more than once cutting the middle school portion of the school and making it a highschool only move the boys to 9th grade#how do we feel about the name “Elijah”?
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Forgot to add that a higher percent of this batch reacted in the cool skippy, repulsed way to the magnet, so maybe whatever change happened to it was actually a good thing? It also could simply be that there was a slight difference in the initial composition tho, so who knows. There's even a moderate to very good chance that i mixed up the vials because i'm a stupid idiot and i actually used the Fe(II) vial (i used a very small amount of FeCl2 instead of the CuCl2) which would obviously explain the colour change observed and why the colour change didn't impact reaction (well, it actually would have since the Fe(II) samples that were cooked immediately, without the chance to go to Fe(III), showed no magnetic response). The response of this substance is still very strongly diamagnetic, not para- or ferro- magnetic, so that's somewhat of a good sign. AFAIK, if this is in fact Fe(III), then that would make sense to be doing something somewhat similar but possibly to a greater degree than Cu if it's true that the Cu is in the 3+ state. Obviously if this was in fact an iron compound, that means that i wasn't successful in reproducing a copper based stp superconductor (or other funky magnetic substance), but that's an issue for future me (once i find the other vial that i brought with me that either contains the Fe(II) doped suspension or the thing i had intended to cook 2 days ago which is the Cu based one.
(potential) Superconductor updates:
Replicated it in the dorms despite the fact that the suspension had turned an awful yellow-red colour (it was a faint blue-white). Unfortunately, despite putting a lid on it, it doesn't seem to work 20 hours later. Also, this was a mix brought from home more than 2 weeks ago. The fact that the amount of time in water doesn't seem to show any difference indicates to me that the most important part is in the cooking. Alas, i have no copper or calcium chloride despite begging the chem department. So, that'll be needed for future experiments. Gonna try to get them from the uni again but i may have to buy it sadly. It's very strange that the colour was so dramatically changed and yet the effect was largely unchanged. That seems to indicate that the colourant (presumably a copper ion) was not in fact a necessary part? And it's not like it remains unchanged afterwards either, with the earlier samples, after i heated it it would be off-white whereas now the whole substance is an awful yellow-green-brown colour. It may be solely working with Ca2+, Al3+, and B3+. IDK tho. It'd still be kinda weird to me, if there was no help by the copper at all. I gotta get some calcium chloride first and test to see if i really do also need the copper. Or even if i can replicate it at all.
At the very least i saved a few drops of the suspension in an airtight container so that if worst comes to worst and i can't make it anew, i can (hopefully) run a mass spec and a few analytical chem tests (assuming the chem lab folks let me). Ideally though i'd just make it anew sometime soon. I can very super easily and definitively rule out iron contamination this time as any sort of possible factor since the cooking step took place in an aluminium container (the cut out bottom of a thoroughly cleaned out monster energy can). I was pretty sure it wasn't iron contamination (like, it was doing the wrong effect from what one would assume from iron anyways), but now i'm very confident.
I feel like there was something else important to say, but idk what it is.
Last thought on the matter: I will hopefully very soon be able to have more resources because i'm gonna be in conversation with one of the professors at my school who's an expert in magnetism and also ceramics and her research group is currently focusing on things that aren't publicly disclosed, but vaguely about inorganic "magnetically and electrically interesting" compounds. Also her students say she's the nicest person in the world, so i'm double excited. Anyway, so, tuesday afternoon, i'll either be infantilized, found to be not quite up to spec, or be given a great opportunity.
#idfk what i'm doing anymore#superconductors are rad#but like this probably isn't one#idk what else it could be#but what're the odds a dumbass like me found it#the weekend sadness is here#i have good friends in my dorm#i should be happier#idk what's wrong#yeah i'm ranting in the tags#successes are few and far between#i may never have one again#i need things i won't get#i'm probably gonna fail my classes#i don't do anything good when i'm depressed#which doesn't help lol#i need to curl up in a ball and cry for a few hours#“usually when people ask how i'm doing the real answer is i'm doing shitty#but i can't say i'm doing shitty because i don't even have a good reason to be doing shitty so if i say 'i'm doing shitty'#and they say 'why? what's wrong?' and i have to be like 'idk all of it'"#not a good sign when i start remembering bojack horseman#to be fair it's not much worse than listening to the sad pierce the veil and my chemical romance songs#thanks and sorry
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I think the problem. the problem is that I have always been afraid of not being invited into the inner circle. and am always wanting to be part of the inner circle. inner circle being the circle of love and companionship and communion. of course being a TCK and a bit of a sheltered homeschooled oddball child has nudged this further along over the years. but I didn't realise how STRONG that desire still burned. to actually be wanted.
#in other words today has been an oddly sad day! discovering that the friends you've made have their own group chats#that are separate from the general group chat (that no one ever talks on) that you aren't a part of is......... i don't know#i KNOW i'm liked by them and i KNOW they love me but do they WANT me around?#like. i know i'm not UNpleasant to have around. i am a good listener and a good conversationalist.#i work very hard at it because it doesn't come naturally to me.#but clearly that's not enough to be added to exclusive group chats! clearly that's not enough to be part of inner core circles#i don't know this just came out of nowhere and i feel as if i've been slapped in the face#sitting at a table where people are talking about the thing someone sent to the group chat#or the photo or quote or reel someone sent to someone else is....... bizarre.#i am trying not to be so hurt by it! i am trying not to take it so personally#it happens. i know it happens. i know it will keep happening. it is just that i thought this was a place where i wouldn't be lonely#and this is the dorm community i've invested so much of my time and energy and love into since last year.#so i think i'm justified in being a little upset!#i'm not crying about it but that's because i'm not about to cry with other people sitting here in the study lounge!#the math is probably really wrong here but i thought that if i poured love in for the sake of pouring love in#somehow somewhere along the line i would also receive love. that i would actually be a part of this community.#anyway that's not going to change how i live here! i committed myself to doing my best this last year#because i don't want anyone to feel left out or unwanted or lonely. i already made the decision#to do everything i can to love the people here.#i'm not trying to toot my horn this is just what i actually want to and have decided to do!#i have birthday cards planned! i have midterm snacks planned!#i've just worked out how i can print christmas and easter cards and stickers!#i'm GOING to love darn it all i'm GOING to pour love in#i think it hurts especially because there's the boy problem going on too#of not being wanted in an area that i DIDN'T expect to be wanted in#and then learning that there is a collective not being wanted in this whole community#it is a Lot and it is very hard and i don't know what to do with it!#i have had this lie (that i'm inherently unloveable and undesirable) in my head since childhood#and i've worked SO HARD to shut that voice up. and it is so so hard to not believe it right now
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Moving to college tmr guys …………
(Special shout out to tumblr user lotus pear who dropped by at my place to wish me off and then nearly killed off my entire team in persona 4)
#is it normal to have all this stuff 😭😭😭#bro my roommate was so nice she gave me a whole dorm tour and ever#ything#sorry it cut off#this WILL NOT be like highschool#I WILL socialize this time and make friends (trust)#I’ll never forget the girl who sat next to me in ap lit#and told me she was scared to talk to me for the first few weeks#cause she thought I was mad 😭😭😭😭😭#I WANTED TO LEAVE THE CLASSROOM#praying for good social interactions 🙏🏼🙏🏼🙏🏼🙏🏼#haliai rambles
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didn't know you were a dorm warrior cheye, how' was 'd you like the experience of living away from home?
(general) unfortunately i didnt have a cawr then, and also the kitchen was communal (and had the washer and dryer units in it) so I tried to avoid being spotted in there due to the Embarrassment and Shame of being alive, so it was really not too different than living at home where my room is my entire world...just a bit more quiet and peaceful loafing.
(specific) the college i attended is surrounded by water so was nice to walk around the few times I did. I saw Raccoon in person for the first time in my life ^_^ and many smunks and osprey, pelican my best friend pelican
#skunk mail#Anonymous#there was a bus i took around several times but it never seemed worth it to go#(until i made the friends i did and we'd go on it together to the mall) but ykwim#id eat at dining hall but if they didnt have anything i wanted id have to get creative#not only bc getting to the grocery store by bus was a whole planned ordeal#but also because well id be on edge in the kitchen all the time. like please dont walk in on me making embarrassing meals.#im embarrassed.#but as a whole was good experience#those posts about how the ideal living experience is like a college dorm is true in the way that everything is close together#for ex. i liked that i had to take a long long walk to get my mail from the mail room...forced to get sun
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looking at the clock and going "oh. i didn't. even realize it was past 8pm." and its not funny or cool its just unbelievably concerning
#medusa rambles#kind of venty ig#ive been having. a really shitty two weeks and an even shittier few days#i decided to step down from the student organization i started a year ago#which basically means itll probably fade into oblivion#i lost so many connections i had to this awful fucking college#in the past two weeks#and its like#all i have left tying me there is a degree that i don't really need for what i want to do#and a handful of professors & staff i genuinely value#i have very little support system in general and its just#why am i even staying here#why stay. genuinely why stay#i am such a community based person and like#i have no community there#everyone who im close with there just#are busy and i get it and i understand it but we Don't Talk. they understand my life via scattered updates that they dont really care for#and talking into the void is funny until its. not.#and logically i know that this is just like. pure depression speaking and not actually reflective of whether my friends care for me or not#but it just doesnt matter#and i think its just like. i Need to stop trying#because every attempt at any form of connection#that just fails completely and utterly is so severely damaging#but what do i have if i don't try. what is there otherwise.#i remember a year ago#when i first started college#sitting in my dorm and sobbing every night because i was just so fucking isolated from everyone around me#and its like. nothing has really changed. i am just as isolated as i was then#i think honestly like. maybe i do just need to be hospitalized again#i dont. feel like i did when i was 16 but i know that This is not sustainable and not good and like. sitting and going
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ok yes i don’t like the ship but like, i think rookvil shippers are very correct in portraying rook as someone with a variety of interests and his own likes but the second Vil comes up he drops everything to talk about how stunning and wonderful she is
like. yeah. we see a ton of that in book 5 even if i interpret why he does it and the impact differently but i can see why people find it romantic
but nobody acknowledges that Trey is literally exactly the fucking same about riddle and it drives me crazy. He drives me crazy. I have split on this cartoon character while playing this game before because he would not shut up about riddle rosehearts. he never SHUTS THE FUCK UP about riddle rosehearts.
and it’s fucking insane because like, Vil is a movie star and a fashion model. It’s very easy to see why someone would be enamored by her. (I know he would even if she wasn’t blah blah)
Meanwhile riddle is this stupid fucking angry little British boy who has never watched a tv show before. riddle would flip shit if he learned about Sonic the hedgehog because the concept of a character not respecting the law and playing by his own rules is bad enough, but he’s a HEDGEHOG? Such graceful animals would never act so disrespectful and crass. And Trey clover is in love with him. He is fucking head over heels for him. He wants to spend the rest of his life with a guy who had to be held back because Ace told him “eat my shorts” when he turned the Simpsons off. We need to put Trey clover under a microscope and study him.
#im almost never into childhood friends to lovers so the fact that a ship with it grabbed me THIS hard#when they like aren’t even my fav characters in their OWN DORM but them and their relationship have an IRON GRIP on me#That’s how you know it’s good. And this is why. Because Trey is a fucking crazy person and madly in love with an angry little British boy.#i had no idea you were such a baller.
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i enjoyed high school! i had a lot of friends! some of them were even close! but holy SHIT . i can say, with full confidence now. HIGH SCHOOL SUCKS SHIT and im GLAD I DON'T GO THERE!!!
#my school was actually pretty nice for a high school#my teachers were cool#im actual friends w one of em#but like. Omfg#if you as a high school student have ever felt annoyed about being treated like a baby or feel like you're just getting pushed around#like you're not treated as a real person. even by the staff who are nice. like all the clique stuff is stupid bullshit and you just want to#be an adult already#don't listen to anyone who tells you to treasure your high school years they can be fun but BEING AN ADULT IS SO MUCH BETTER#i got excited to VACUUM the other day!!! because my space in the dorms is MINE#and oh my god i love my parents and my family and their house is nice. BUT WOW LIVING IN A DORM RULES#not just bc its a nice dorm (That helps) but bc . like . so much is up to ME and im part of every decision#by default#and i get to Decide everything#a good part of this is just starting w a blank slate yk. i dont have to clean anything up and get rid of old stuff and rearrange#to decorate the new room in a way i want (in a way thats designed for me to keep it clean‚ rather than just the way that Happened)#and its like. i can really take pride in my space yk?#like i share it w 3 roommates but my part is Mine#and its not just where i sleep its like... i decorate it i clean it i like it i hang out in it#augh. college good.#if you're in high school no matter how much you like life rn: IT GETS BETTER
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I’m always so fascinated by people’s bad roommate stories. I’m not sure I’ll ever live with someone I haven’t vetted extensively beforehand ever again
#every living situation where i’ve been assigned roommates randomly; i always seem to get one person who is an absolute angel#and 1-2 people who are honestly fucked up#i lived in halls 1 year of undergrad and everyone was kind of equally insane. honestly no one stood out as particularly bad#because everyone was just constantly screaming. i dealt with it by going home most weekends and getting noise cancelling headphones#3rd year of undergrad i lived in a suite which.. honestly was basically an apartment. had a living room/kitchenette; a toilet; a shower room#and 4 bedrooms#one of my roommates i’m still friends with to this day but honestly they were and are kind of a ridiculous person#like they were actively dealing drugs most of the year and their boyfriend was around most of the time and they would bone LOUDLY#and that’s the good roommate. so you can imagine the other two#one of the others.. honestly wasn’t a bad roommate; she was helpful and clean and civil#she was loud as hell though. she used to have attacks of insomnia and decide to rearrange her furniture at 3 in the morning#and we shared a wall. she also had an illegal pet rabbit.#our personalities just didn’t mesh well; like it became clear pretty fast that we were going to spend as little time together as possible#third roommate was loud; rude; annoying and gross. she’d be calling people at 7am just to yell down the phone to them about her problems#i was like who is picking up the phone to this bitch. she also picked up on my homosexual vibes in that way that homophobic straight girls#always seem to have; and was convinced i had a crush on her. and she bought a betta fish (allowed according to dorm rules) and then it died#because she didn’t want to take care of it properly. and she refused to do anything for herself#like she was always breaking shit and leaving it because she didn’t want to email or call maintenance. so then i’d have to do it#because it was always something we specifically shared. like a set of shelves she put a fucking 5lb shampoo bottle on. twice.#in grad school it was almost the same thing. one angel roommate who was kind of messy but otherwise fantastic#she rolled the best joints i have ever seen. and i still miss her cat cali#it was the men that were the problem. one was an international student who left after a month and bothered nobody#like to the point i didn’t notice when he moved out because he was so innocuous#the other two though….. so one of them started hooking up with my favourite roommate and immediately became SUPER annoying#the other one stole shit; left lights on all the time; left fridge and cupboard and freezer doors open; tried to guilt trip me#into giving him my weed; played mariah carey at 2am; never bought a single cleaning product or household item for the collective#unless you told him to…… he was even using my toothpaste at one point. like. sir.#oh and he was always dirtying other people’s dishes and cookware and leaving them in the sink for days. and leaving big chunks of food#in the sink. it was fucking gross#personal
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Failed a social interaction 0 injured 1 killed (me)
#Today has been so long 😭😭😭 I've been out the whole day studying and when I came back I spent more than one hour to cook my probably gone–#bad chicken (and rice and spinach) and then I couldn't even eat it because it was my turn to clean the kitchen at the dorm (which is the–#third following day I'm doing) (worth mentioning I'm running on 5 hours of sleep)#And I was goofing around with my friends but while doing so I. made fun of the landlord. And then one friend told me “hey girl he's right–#outside” and like 😭😭😭😭😭😭 I hope I die painfully. I need to be back next year and he already makes my life hard enough and hhhhhhhhhhh#I wasn't even like. Serious. It was just to joke around with my friends I don't have anything against him (except for the things I do)#hhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh#And now I feel so embarrassed I have no appetite at all + the chicken (which I had to bring home through one hour walk in summer which–#probably wasn't good for it. And then froze one day past the expiration day) (I really need to get better eating habits) I had been–#preparing despite taking one hour to cook it I got the firing wrong and now it's all hard and honestly not very good and like 😭😭😭#Look at what you did to the (frankly already diseased) chicken#I feel so betrayed by everything 😭😭😭 Can life get a little easier#I'm mostly kidding I'm doing okay. I just need to rant because I CAN'T GET OVER THE LANDLORD THING MAN HOW DO I FORGET ABOUT IT.#This kind of things always haunts me for at least three days so 😭😭😭#I'm dead tired but I really wanted to answer asks today so. Probably doing so between today and tomorrow#Rant over sending lots of l love 💞💞#random rambles#In my defense it's not my fault I'm too poor to throw the chicken away 😪😪 I haven't eaten since forever#It's also not my fault I can't afford a new non sticking pan so I have to stick (ah) to the probably toxic one#It is very much my fault for messing up the chicken cooking temperature tho lol
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thinking too much about rinne and hinata friendship. you're telling me rinne doesn't hang out at the sweets dorm all the time? the dorm with his boyfriend and brother in it? and also his favoritest junior ever besides kohaku? cmon
#the favoritest junior i just made up. hinata is rinne's favorite in my head#cuz hinata was the first one besides crazyb/alkaloid to really give him a chance#and listen. listen i did just post 1.6k words of them bonding but also listen#late nights rinne hinata hiiro niki gaming and eating and having fun#rinne just crashes at their dorm bc he doesnt feel like going back to his own#i love hikari dorm too dont get me wrong but they also have kinda established that they just. do their own things#it wouldnt be out of character for rinne to just not show up one night because he was at niki's dorm giving him a hard time#hinata and hiiro watching them flirt very badly and then they all get destroyed by hinata's epic gamer skillz#when they play splatoon or whatever. lots of smiles and good times#also hinata and rinne are 100% practical jokes friends. they get up to things tell me im wrong#nothing that would seriously injure someone but like. shenanigans.#shay speaks
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Lol. Lol. Lol.
#this is why i didnt want to move home 😂😂😂😂😂😂 being expected to cook and do the kitchen things#and not a single person cleaning in this house except for mom!!! = also me because i cant let my mother do all the work#anyway im tired lol!!!!! and i want to live with my 2 friends in the city#and meal prep together have my own space and not be subjected to more You should exercise comments#this is weight gained from depressive stress eating mom :-) i am Stressed and im trying not to cope this way but it is a process#anyway i miss my dorm i miss seeing 40+ people at meals i miss having the privacy to sing my heart out#i miss living in a small and manageable space i miss my FRIENDS i miss that boy (this is not a positive thing to miss admittedly)#i miss living right by the coffee shop that sells the Best Sandwich Ever and a honking good lavender vanilla latte#i also miss being able to fit into my favourite jeans. this is a self inflicted issue and it annoys me#anyway i am medium miserable and there is still a HECK TON of things to do#like unpack and go to the grocery store because its my father's birthday and ive committed#to cooking birthday dinner because birthday lunch was an unfortunate flop#o yeah also i miss having access to cheap obscenely strong black tea. that kept me going through finals#im only here a month before im off to my summer job which will be Away from here!! but darn it all its going to be a Month
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literlaly terirble night last night
#first of all the gay party was capped and me and my friend were devastated cuz we were so ready to make out w girls#second of all i went to the other frat that me and my gf met at and guess what. i fucking saw her there#id been there before sinc ewe came back but ive never seen her so far there but idk what i was expecting#not only that but we literally met at the drink station as in full relapse of last sem when we also said hi there and hit it off#so mebarrsing#not only that btu this frat was so good last sem but now its ass so the music wasnt even fun and i wasnt feeling it#and then these ASSHOLE GUYS are mocking me for being an english major. that REALLY pissed me off#AND THEN on my way back im waiting for the bus and she and ehr friends pull up tot he bus stop too#and then i got back to my dorm and just sobbed for like an hour and wandered around voice memoing my friends sobbing#like its so humilaitng its so fukced up how much our breakup is impacting me why cant ijust move on#i know its been like 4 weeks but comeon . im sor eady to be over her i hate feeling this dread#AND THEN im finally like you know closing my suite door and the lock jams so im fidgeting with it and one of her friend makes eye contact w#me. SHE DOESNT EVEN LIVE IN TEH SAME BUILDING AS ME!!! WHY WAS SHE THEREEEE#and i literally have tears all over mye yes and i had no idea she was coming so we just made ey contact and then i shut teh door
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