#my school was actually pretty nice for a high school
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steviewashere · 2 days ago
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I'm adding onto this because I am having more thoughts, somehow.
Steve is smart, we all know this. But he's smart in a way that's not perceptive to everybody around him. Keep on with me here, I know this is random.
He has a certain cleverness, a customized and form-fitting mask that he wears to protect himself. No, he can't protect himself by fighting—we've seen how that's gone down; one fight won and it still didn't end up pretty for him at the end of the day. He can't protect his preservation, constantly throwing himself in the danger. But he can protect his vulnerability, the rawer parts of himself that he hasn't allowed anybody to see.
It's so simple for him to slip into this mask, Steve Harrington the Charmer. He learned it, picked up all these skills on the way from being in the face of charismatic people: the businessmen that his dad would have over for work dinners, waiters he'd meet at higher end restaurants, John Travolta in Grease (who he totally wasn't drooling over), the principals in his schools, so on and so forth.
However, with how easy it is to basically form fit himself into this character, it's harder and harder to slip away from it. This...armored shell he's put around his flesh. Though, deep under that armor, beyond the flesh, under his ribcage, he has a heart that beats just like everybody else's; he has a brain under his "thick skull" that knows exactly what he needs and wants. He has his desires cupped in his palms, cradled close to his vivacious heart.
He crafts the mask early on in his life, though. Hears how his dad talks about "queers"—but queer just means different, doesn't it? So his dad must be talking about different people, right? Steve's different from the girl in his second grade class; it's simple—she's a girl, he's not—that's difference, that's queer...yeah? And so, based on that logic, he makes a little kid remark, "Madeline in my class is queer," and at that—his dad looks...just as angry as he is when Mom is arguing with him. So Steve isn't right. He doesn't say something like that again. It's all these small things. Just little things at first.
Then the little things turn to bigger things. Rumors in high school make him have to bite his tongue, in fear he'll get so outraged at his dad that something will just slip up. It's when he accidentally catches guys in the locker room giving each other handies—words of his dad's floating in his head about how "dirty" and "disgusting" it is.
Even if the locker room piques his interest. Even when he's catching drive-in movies and staring longer at the guys with their broad shoulders and tensing biceps and glistening eyebrows way more than he's making note about the women and their cleavage—like his buddy Tommy would do in his ear. And speaking of Tommy...his hands and his pretty big eyes and his freckles and the height difference and and and—
Wires get crossed somewhere in there.
He wants his dad to like him? Then he needs to make his dad proud, right? Spew the same words. Knock some screws around. Act a bit ditzy and too cool and class clown about the world. Earn a name, earn an image.
Even if it physically makes him ache deep and troubled in his stomach to say that bullshit. But he's gotta make his dad proud. "I'm taking a girl out," and "She was a very nice girl just...[not my type] no ambition after high school," and "I'm going out with Ted Wheeler's daughter, Nancy. She's a top notch student, willing to help me study, might actually get me into Tech."
He gets the pats on his shoulder. The smile with no teeth. The "atta boy".
Yet, at the same time, a slow to solder metal plate around his chest and a hammering heart behind it, jelly legs and heavy metal feet, his tingling fingers yearning for Tommy's soft palms and tensing his own hands so he can stop.
But Tommy is what he wants. And so is Peter in his English class. And so is Harvey from his Algebra class. There's Isaac and Ben and Ryan...Ethan and Jared and Luis...and how could he forget about Brad on his basketball team?
His mask is thick on his face, though; almost makes his head too heavy for his neck. And Nancy's hand holds are kinda nice. He misses her between classes...her gossip and her chattiness and her giggle fits...the kissing is alright, he supposes, just not as tender as he'd like to be. She's warm, though. And she's sweet, smart, caring. Breaks some of his mold with her nerdy friends and her nerdy brother, her saccharine smiles and long eyelashes. Sometimes, Tommy congratulates him after Steve goes on and on about the date he went on with Nancy—it's almost like he's getting a taste of what Tommy would want out of him, too.
Tommy thinks red roses are the best choice. And comedies are the best movies. He likes his popcorn with extra butter and a chilled can of Coke to go with it. Tommy doesn't put out on the first date—"Never have, never will. Gotta get to know my date first." He thinks dinner dates are terrible because he hates seeing how his date chews, especially on the first date—"Though, sometimes, it's better to know right away, Stevie. It's...kinda like a precautionary measure, y'know?" When Tommy kisses his dates, he cradles their neck; Steve has always wondered if Tommy would trace the moles on his neck if they were to—
Nancy calls him bullshit. Nancy can't tell him that she loves him.
And he shouldn't feel relieved, he shouldn't. But he sorta is. Sorta, though. Because if he couldn't even get someone like Nancy Wheeler to love him, then who will?
Have his other girlfriends felt the same way? Could they tell that there was something else to him? Were there too many cracks in his smiles?
If it's ever okay to have a boyfriend—because right now it isn't, not with that disease going around, not with what his dad says, not with Reagan—would those boyfriends think the same way? Would they call him bullshit for only ever being with women prior? Would they tell him that he doesn't have enough to give? That he's an impostor?
Who is he really an imposter to?
His partners? His parents?
Himself?
It's too big of a question to answer. But it's a question—or, really, a series of questions—that click and clack around his skull like the pendulum marbles that Mr. Clarke had on his desk. There's an itching, fresh scabbing anxiety carbonating in his blood. That everybody can tell there's something different, that maybe he's compensating a little too hard.
So he backs away a bit. Lets go of his previous ambitions, the desire to be seen one way—even if the true is desire is to just be free. To be the queer, the difference; a person he could be, rather than should be.
And once he's sitting on that bathroom floor, knees knocking against Robin Buckley's of all people, something settles in him. Not a calm sort of settle, but a settle nonetheless. He gets it. The reverent bravery, that peel back Robin is giving him, letting him see the citrus flavorful center of her soul. It takes a lot to admit something like this, like that.
It's not his time, not yet.
But he sees Robin flourish. Her rattling, raspy laughter. The freckles that develop on her face over the coming month after Starcourt, running free and open in the sun. Come September, ducking into the break room to ramble on and on about this girl in band, splitting burgers over a paper bag, dipping French fries into ketchup on the same damn bag.
It's surprisingly easy to talk to her about her queerness. To be able to pull out a magazine and point at actresses and models that seem like Robin's type. To finally pick-up on the subtle clues that Robin really, really likes this girl from band—noticing well before Robin even notices.
And though he keeps up the image for a while longer, he knows at least one thing:
Robin is who he'll come to first.
Well, after he faces the man in the mirror.
I love secretly closeted Steve Harrington. I love when he knows himself, knows the truth of his identity, knows that how he views men isn't a fluke. I love secretly closeted Steve Harrington who dates girls and has sex with girls to protect himself, to keep an image, to try and earn an ounce of recognition and respect from his dad.
I love secretly closeted Steve Harrington who recognizes Robin's bravery when she came out. But he keeps his secret to himself for a while longer. Who joins in on the joke of just how bad he is at pulling girls. Who upholds an image as just that, an image.
A secretly closeted Steve who gets frustrated at the projection painted onto him. Steve Harrington the ladies' man. Steve Harrington who gets the girl. Steve Harrington who can get into bed with any girl he wants. He's frustrated and he hates all the assumptions, but he can't shake them, can't explain why—not without revealing himself. But he knows who he is. Knows the type of person he wants.
I love when he's nervous, but still proud. Who, slowly and surely, cements his identity within himself—so it transcends knowledge, it's deeply intertwined within. He goes to Robin first, because he feels as though that's a good first baby step—because he knows for certain that Robin will accept him. And, with minor hesitance, goes to Nancy. And with a long conversation, some tissues, and gentle smiles passed back and forth, Nancy then understands, too.
The last person is Eddie. Which is harder. Which frustrates him further. Because Eddie won't stop asking him about women, won't stop categorizing him as straight, some god among men. He just wants to be Steve Harrington. Not Steve Harrington. Not ladies man, Steve Harrington.
Steve Harrington who likes men. Only men. Who compensated for years just so he can uphold a safe life for himself, who was threatened constantly (though not directly at him) by what his dad would say about those queers, who covered for himself the only way he knew how.
And though it takes longer, some deep wounds and harsh words about how he isn't experimenting, that his sexuality can't just be decided for him, that he has a right to explore—even if the exploration never amounted to anything—Steve is able to get Eddie's trust. Eventually, again slowly, get Eddie's hand intertwined with his. And even later after that, a shy kiss; his first kiss with a man that aids in solidifying the last, hairline fracture in his whole.
Steve Harrington who is gay and learns over time to be proud of that. But also, closeted Steve Harrington who goes on the journey to get to the end result—I love him so so so much and he means so much to me. And now I need to write him and make this version a reality.
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trashisstillhere · 3 days ago
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Guess whose parents I have just designed? (And didn’t feel like cleaning up, do better line art and colouring along with shading for yet?)
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Yeah that’s right, it’s New Ninja’s!!! Meet their big workaholics yet loving mother and father!!
I still am trynna work on some stuff, I’m even planning on redesign Randy’s parents in my headcanon as we speak, also gonna do my own version of First Ninja’s family too, like I think of them alot in my head but barely drawn anything out so I wanna do that too really much hehe- yeah I got a lot to do.
Aaanywaysss. Let me tell y’all a bit about these two!
-NN’s parents are often really busy at their jobs so they can barely get to hang out with their child because of it, the only times they kinda get to interact more often are in the weekends but other then that, NN is often left home alone.
-just like everyone else, they don’t know that NN’s the ninja. And they don’t know about their relationship with Randy as their mentor and good friend either.
-just like their kid, they don’t have any names neither yet lol. Coming up with names one of the hardest parts of making ocs. For now, let’s just call them NM (new mom) and ND (new dad). Yeah I know it’s a little bit weird but until I finally can think of something for them, these will have to do.
-NM is a Japanese woman with sectoral heterochromia who works as a therapist! If you’re wondering what kind of therapy she does, it’s mostly behavioural. She’s almost very soft spoken, genuine and really wants to do her best to help people with their issues, including her own kid. However, she barely knows much about the shit her poor child goes through right now with their current life, she doesn’t know about NN being the ninja after all.
Most of the time, the people she work with in therapy sessions are usually normal but there are times that she has met some who seemed to struggle after being STANKED. Yes you heard right, some of her patients are stanked victims! A few past ones during Randy’s time as the ninja and now a lot more in the current time with NN now being the current one, those kinds of patients are kinda a whole other story.
-ND is an American man who works as a doctor! He is pretty skilled in a lot of things at his job, surgery is one of them. He’s more calm, serious and strict. His voice is kinda like monotone and very deep, a lot of people who sees him at first glance and hear his voice might think he’s quite cold but that’s far from the truth. He’s just a man who takes his job seriously, he also has a soft spot, mostly for his wife and child.
Like NM, he also has no clue about the struggles NN has right now. However, he did have his suspicions. He couldn’t talk much about it due to being so busy in job tho but whenever he has time, he’ll always make sure to tell the kid that if they ever need someone to talk to, they can talk to him.
-now back in their high school days together before NN was even born, they didn’t really know that much people other then themselves. They were high school sweethearts.. however, ND did actually know one guy the whole year. They weren’t like bffs but they did know each other very well so they were close and even now as adults in the present, they still interact sometimes, maybe even get some tea or coffee if they have time and aren’t busy. They went to different universities back then but that did nothing to their pretty nice bond.
You’re probably wondering who this ‘guy’ is and if he’s even important or just a random oc I made up…well he’s actually a canon character from Rc9gn. Yes, he is actually in the show. So who is it??…
……Willem Viceroy III.
HeheheheheHEHEHEHE- no I am not explaining this, ya gotta figure out yourself! What I will say tho is that yes, this will have an effect in NN’s story. 😏
——
And that’s about it!
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theintelligentfool · 1 month ago
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i enjoyed high school! i had a lot of friends! some of them were even close! but holy SHIT . i can say, with full confidence now. HIGH SCHOOL SUCKS SHIT and im GLAD I DON'T GO THERE!!!
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stinkypeanutbutter · 8 months ago
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this is how their next interaction is gonna be trust
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spaghett-onaplate · 11 months ago
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sixth day at my new school and i didn't sit alone at lunch today 🥳🥳
#woohoo!!#some girls invited me to sit with them so i did and chatted to them and this other guy#some of them are in my classes!! they were all very nice#honestly i was aiming to just try and fit in with the cishet boys and last week when i heard the rumour i was gay i was kinda freaked out#but i've scoped out the situation and it's not unsafe to be out (as bi. not anyone's business i'm trans)#so i realise it's better to just be open and have better chances of finding the right people than living in fear and squashing myself to--#--fit in with the wrong people. bc if i can't be fully myself around someone then why would i want to be good friends with them??#so yar i'll stick with other queer guys and supportive girls. gay guy/straight girl friendships are stereotypical but it's an ecosystem tha#works in a situation like high school tbh#ooo and i guess he was away today but the guy from a couple of my classes who i think is cute is in that group so added bonus#o and actually unrelated but at recess i went to this queer group thing i was invited to by a teacher last week#(recess is first and lunch is sceond)#i wasn't sure if i was going to go (mostly bc of my 'blend in' mindset) but i'm glad i did!! it was pretty nice#mostly just nice to get an idea of 'safe' people and teachers yaknow#'people and teachers' -- those aren't two mutually exclusive categories of being ajdsgjf but ykwim#and if i didn't go then i probably wouldn't have been in the better mindset for being just myself with everyone at lunch#so wahoo yippee :D#now i just needa keep talking to everyone and putting myself out there a bit more and i'll find the right people :)
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donaviolet · 11 months ago
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High school just started this week. I think I would be considered as "your normal high school nerd girl but with a secret"
But my secret is that I am queer and have weird interests. Oh and I'm also a Shadow Wizard
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saph-yells-into-the-void · 5 months ago
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so uhh.. does kids on the slope get better after episode 5
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wuxian-vs-wangji · 6 months ago
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Don't blame me for creeping on the tags, but your high school had an art major for artists???
American schools don't do the major system, but mine had... a way to encourage people to pursue what they like.
You had your core curriculum, which was 42 credits (7 credits per semester possible, 56 credit max possibility if you graduated on time).
Study halls were 0 credits, and for me they were mandatory every semester (Latin was taught at one of the district's 2 high schools, and they'd bus the students back to their main school after, so you had to have a study hall to make up for being late), so my cap was 48 credits.
But those extra 14 credits you could fill by taking extra classes. Math, computer science, science, art, history, band, choir, woodworking, 4H, homebuilding, economics, language- even the phys ed nerds could take weightlifting and such.
So in a way, you could think of it as having a major, but it was just extra classes that you could take within whatever interested you.
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fingertipsmp3 · 9 months ago
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No one:
Me: does anyone want to hear what my sims family did today
#i am fucking neck deep in the sims 2 super collection and will not be resurfacing any time soon#so far nannies are causing ALL of my problems in this neighbourhood it’s actually ridiculous#tell me why this bitch; instead of waiting for my sim to get home from work and pay her; left early and stole one of our kitchen counters#and THE TODDLER’S XYLOPHONE?? what was it all for#then she refused to come back the next day so i had to keep the teenager home to watch his little brother. SHERYL WHEN I FIND YOUUUU#thank god i managed to resurrect his grades#also in a different family the kid aged up into the fucking whiniest person in the world. and i’m trying to find him a person#but he doesn’t like ANYONE. it’s exhausting. i’m playing the prosperity challenge right? which means i started out with four CAS families#all with kids about the same age. and i was hoping some of them would like each other so i could start merging families next generation#but one of my boys was like ‘nope i like this random girl’ and another was like ‘nope i found a really boring boy’#and another was like ‘i like the paper girl!’ but why do none of you like EACH OTHER. answer me that#i’m not sending all of your boring significant others to college with you. you can have your high school sweetheart with the alien eyes#because she’s pretty cool looking; but the cookie cutter boy and the paper girl might have to stay home to be honest#what else is happening. i mean i renovated a maxis dorm and built some really rubbish community lots#i’m horrendous at building. i go for function over aesthetics so i end up with really boring buildings#but the neighbourhood now has a cemetery; a general store/coffee shop and a roller rink/arcade#so that���s kind of nice. not that anyone USES these businesses. i sent one of the boys there to look for his future spouse and just found#somebody’s dad repeatedly falling over#maybe once they all get to college i can just do some sort of forced proximity love potion situation and they’ll HAVE to like each other#i don’t want to add too many households to the neighbourhood and only one of my original families has one kid#that’s why i want as many people as possible to marry off. BUT NO ONE LIKES EACH OTHER it’s so annoyingggg#personal
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autisticlee · 9 months ago
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If things for non-verbal communication helps you I'd say go for it. Others saying you're not suffering enough to make things easier for you aren't living your life. Do what helps you.
even if I did, the world around me isn't very accommodating. I know all people in my life wouldn't be accepting of it. I don't go out much or have many friends. don't talk where I volunteer but I told them on the form I signed up on that I wouldn't talk and they're surprisingly accepting of it. don't talk at work, but work with my mom so she talks for me basically. the times I would need it would be very hard to use. not sure if I could do it with phone calls or video calls. am known to not call back for important things because dont answer my phone and will try to email them instead and no one wants to answer emails. will beg them not to call in message. they leave voice mail saying they got my message so call them back..... have video calls with my therapist and don't know how i'd use it for that. could help for in person doctor appointments but doctors are so impatient and want me in and out fast, don't know if it would improve much. I already never get to say all I need and non verbal communications is slow. don't know how twitch chat would react, so might be the only viable option...people that know me might be weirded out but whatever. new people might make fun of a robot voice but whatever x2 if I make it part of my "thing" they can deal with it especially if I cam finish making a vtuber and make that their "voice" maybe.... would be hard when playing games having to stop to type and won't say things enough so kinda same problem.....hmmm. could maybe at least work for art streams? 🤔
#sorry for rambling. just working it out in my head#wish it would be easier but world isnt very accomodating so dont know how to navigate that#ah. remembering as a kid desperately wishing i could learn sign language and teach everyone around me so i could acrually communicate#but didnt have internet and couldnt find books for it and no one wanted to learn it for me either#was excited to take it in high school but they got rid of a bunch of classes because not enough funding and cant afford teachers :/#is alternative communication easier for me if hurdles it has are exhausting too? just emailing places is very stressful and tiring#and they never accommodate that. either ignoring or calling anyway! cant get a prescription because they dont read emails!#S I G H#talking feels so hard for me but am told don't count as semiverbal/semispeaking. makes me wonder how hard is for actual semispeakers#or dare i say....would i actually count and just got wrong info because i explain bad...idk.#am wondering if its common where people get mad because You Can Make Mouth Sounds So I Only Listen Of You Speak!#used to write in notebook to try communicating at school. people say they wont read and had teacher tear paper up and force speech#he got no speech.#pretty sure using aac would be similar “use your voice. i wont listen to that! i know you can talk!” people irl are ignorant and not nice#why this post take 45 minutes to make....typing is tiring 😅#so used to trying to typer perfect so people understand better and am known to be really good writer. but. so tiring....#maybe should try shorter wordings. is easier. hope people understand. uhhdhhdhssdhhdbdhefhf tired
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silhouettecrow · 1 year ago
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365 Days of Writing Prompts: Day 204
Adjective: Halting
Noun: Bow
Definitions for those who need/want them:
Halting: slow and hesitant, especially through lack of confidence, or faltering
Bow: a knot tied with two loops and two loose ends, used especially for tying shoelaces and decorative ribbons; a decorative ribbon tied in a bow; a weapon for shooting arrows, typically made of a curved piece of wood whose ends are joined by a taut string; a bowman; a long, partially curved rod with horsehair stretched along its length, used for playing the violin and other stringed instruments; a single passage of a bow over the strings of a violin or other stringed instrument; a curved stroke forming part of a letter (e.g. b, p); a metal ring forming the handle of a key or pair of scissors; (North American) a side piece or lens frame of a pair of glasses; an act of bending the head or upper body as a sign of respect or greeting; the front end of a ship
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rosicheeks · 1 year ago
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02: Who did you last say “I love you” to?
07: What did you last eat? (I bet it's goldfishies)
26: What are you craving right now? (I bet it's goldfishies)
31: Does somebody love you? (I do Princess)
40: Have you ever walked outside completely naked?
2 - my parents 💖
7 - chocolate cake 🤭
26 - I’m not craving any food right now tbh. I’m craving love and financial stability and a comfy cozy house
31 - I hope so
40 - if skinny dipping counts then yes? Otherwise no lol
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spiderziege · 2 years ago
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oh wait lol maybe the glass bead game Is treated like classic lit in germany, actually, given that Hesse is a german author. I’m American and I have yet to encounter anyone here who’s even heard of it, its a sad cold place to be a Hesse fan out here 😔
hi, yes, it's that hermann hesse :D i actually havent finished the glass bead game yet (i think im about halfway? but ive kinda had it on pause for a bit cause i was reading other stuff lol). it is classic lit here but tbh i havent met many people who've read it either... my favorite book of his is definitely narcissus & goldmund tho, and i've read siddhartha and demian as well
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fakevariety · 1 month ago
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gym is done!!! only one more class then i get to go home
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phantom-z0ne · 4 months ago
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Through the Looking Glass: 723 words written
Was pretty productive today! This is actually way funner to write than I thought. I did write more today, but it was a school assignment.
Last sentence(s) written:
Brooklynn scrubbed harder, brows knitted in thought. Did that mean she was her own blind spot? Why? Was that just how seeing the future worked? Did this happen to other seers?
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haljathefangirlcat · 1 year ago
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#one thing I think it’s always important to think about when looking at ancient literature#and it’s evolution#is the fact that they are working with an array of knowledge and stories will never get to learn#they are being influenced by things lost to history#there are like 7-8 centuries between Hesiod and Ovid#it makes sense other versions or variations would pop up in that time#and these authors often did take artistic liberty with their material#people writing down these myths often had something to say with them#and that going to influence how they write it#like the anti authority (or really anti Caesar) themes in the metamorphoses#most myths have a bunch of variation#why would Medusa be an exception#anyways this was really good and interesting
The truth about Medusa and her rape... Mythology breakdown time!
With the recent release of the Percy Jackson television series, Tumblr is bursting with mythological posts, and the apparition of Medusa the Gorgon has been the object of numerous talks throughout this website… Including more and more spreading of misinformation, and more debates about what is the “true” version of Medusa’s backstory.
Already let us make that clear: the idea that Medusa was actually “blessed” or “gifted” by Athena her petrifying gaze/snake-hair curse is to my knowledge not at all part of the Antique world. I still do not know exactly where this comes from, but I am aware of no Greek or Roman texts that talked about this – so it seems definitively a modern invention. After all, the figure of Medusa and her entire myth has been taken part, reinterpreted and modified by numerous modern women, feminist activist, feminist movements or artists engaged in the topic of women’s life and social conditions – most notably Medusa becoming the “symbol of raped women’ wrath and fury”. It is an interesting reading and a fascinating update of the ancient texts, and it is a worthy take on its own time and context – but today we are not talking about the posterity, reinvention and continuity of Medusa as a myth and a symbol. I want to clarify some points about the ACTUAL myth or legend of Medusa – the original tale, as told by the Greeks and then by the Romans.
Most specifically the question: Was Medusa raped?
Step 1: Yes, but no.
The backstory of Medusa you will find very often today, ranging from mythology manuals (vulgarization manuals of course) to Youtube videos, goes as such: Medusa was a priestess of Athena who got raped by Poseidon while in Athena’s temple, and as a result of this, Athena punished Medusa by turning her into the monstrous Gorgon.
Some will go even further claiming Athena’s “curse” wasn’t a punishment but a “gift” or blessing – and again, I don’t know where this comes from and nobody seems to be able to give me any reliable source for that, so… Let’s put this out of there.
Now this backstory – famous and popular enough to get into Riodan’s book series for example – is partially true. There are some elements here very wrong – and by wrong I do mean wrong.
The story of Medusa being raped and turned into a monster due to being raped does indeed exist, and it is the most famous and widespread of all the Medusa stories, the one people remembered for the longest time and wrote and illustrated the most about. Hence why Medusa became in the 20th century this very important cultural symbol tied to rape and the abuse of women and victim-blaming. HOWEVER – the origin of this story is Ovid’s Metamorphoses, from the first century CE or so. Ovid? A Roman poet writing for Roman people. “Metamorphoses”? One of the two fundamental works of Roman literature and one of the two main texts of Roman mythology, alongside Virgil’s Aeneid. This is a purely Roman story belonging to the Roman culture – and not the Greek one. The story of Medusa’s rape does not have Greek precedents to my knowledge, Ovid introduced the element of rape – which is no surprise given Ovid turned half of the romances of Greek mythology into rapes. Note that, on top of all this, Ovid wasn’t even writing for religious purposes, nor was his text an actual mythological effort – he wrote it with pure literary intentions at heart. It is just a piece of poetry and literature taking inspiration from the legends of the Greek world, not some sort of sacred text.
Second big point: The legend I summarized above? It isn’t even the story Ovid wrote, since there are a lot of elements that do not come from Ovid’s retelling of the story (book fourth of the Metamorphoses). For example Ovid never said Medusa was a priestess of Athena – all he said was that she was raped in the temple of Athena. I shouldn’t even be writing Athena since again, this is a Roman text: we are speaking of Minerva here, and of Neptune, not of Athena or Poseidon. Similarly, Minerva’s curse did not involve the petrifying gaze – rather all Ovid wrote about was that Minerva turned Medusa’s hair into snakes, to “punish” her because her hair were very beautiful, and it was what made her have many suitors (none of which she wanted to marry apparently), and it is also implied it is what made Neptune fall in love (or rather fall in lust) with her. I guess it is from this detail that the reading of “Athena’s curse was a gift” comes from – even though this story also clearly does victim-blaming of rape here.
But what is very fascinating is that… we are not definitively sure Neptune raped Medusa in Ovid’s retelling. For sure, the terms used by Ovid in his fourth book of Metamorphoses are clear: this was an action of violating, sexually assaulting, of soiling and corrupting, we are talking about rape. But Ovid refers several other times to Medusa in his other books, sometimes adding details the fourth-book stories does not have (the sixth book for examples evokes how Neptune turned into a bird to seduce Medusa, which is completely absent from the fourth book’s retelling of Medusa’ curse). And in all those other mentions, the terms to designate the relationship between Medusa and Neptune are more ambiguous, evoking seduction and romance rather than physical or sexual assault. (It does not help that Ovid has an habit of constantly confusing consensual and non-consensual sex in his poems, meaning that a rape in one book can turn into a romance in another, or reversal)
But the latter fact makes more sense when you recall that the rape element was invented and added by Ovid. Before, yes Poseidon and Medusa loved each other, but it was a pure romance, or at least a consensual one-night. Heck, if we go back to the oldest records of the love between Poseidon and Medusa, back in Hesiod’s Theogony, we have descriptions of the two of them laying together in a beautiful, flowery meadow – a stereotypical scene of pastoral romances – with no mention of any brutality or violence of any sort. As a result, it makes sense the original “romantic” story would still “leak” or cast a shadow over Ovid’s reinvented and slightly-confused tale.
Step 2: So… no rape?
Well, if we go by Greek texts, no, apparently Medusa was not raped in Greek mythology, and only became a rape victim through Ovid.
The Ancient Greek texts all record Poseidon and Medusa sleeping with each other and having children, but no mention of rape. And the whole “curse of Athena” thing is not present in the oldest records – no temple of Athena soiling, no angry Athena cursing a poor girl… “No curse?” you say “But then how did Medusa got turned into a Gorgon”? Answer: she did not. She was born like that.
As I said before, the oldest record of Medusa’s romance but also of her family comes from Hesiod’s Theogony (Hesiod being one of the two “founding authors” of Greek mythology, alongside Homer – Homer did wrote several times about Medusa, but only as a disembodied head and as a monster already dead, so we don’t have any information about her life). And what do we learn? That Medusa is part of a set of three sisters known as the Gorgons – because oh yes, Ovid did not mention Medusa’s sister now did he? How did Medusa’s sisters ALSO got snake-hair or petrifying-gaze if only Medusa was cursed for sleeping with Neptune? Ovid does not give us any answer because again, it is an “adaptational plot hole”, and the people that try to adapt Ovid’s story have to deal with the slight problem of Stheno and Euryale needing to share their sister’s curse despite seemingly not being involved in the whole Neptune business. Anyway, back to the Greek text.
So, you have those three Gorgon sisters, and Medusa is said to be mortal while her sisters are not. Why is it such a big deal? Because Medusa wasn’t originally some random human or priestess. Oh no! Who were the Gorgons’ parents? Phorcys and Keto/Ceto, aka two sea-gods. Not just two sea-gods – two sea-gods of the ancient, primordial generation of sea-gods, the one that predated Poseidon, and that were cousins to the Titans, the sea-gods born of Gaia mating with Pontos.
So the Gorgons were “divine” of nature – and this is why Medusa being a mortal was considered to be a MASSIVE problem and handicap for her, an abnormal thing for the daughter of two deities. But let’s dig a bit further… Who were Phorcys and Ceto? Long story short: in Greek mythology, they were considered to be sea-equivalents of Typhon and Gaia. They were the parents of many monsters and many sea-horrors: Keto/Ceto herself had her name attributed and equated with any very large creature (like whales) or any terrifying monster (like dragons) from the sea. The Gorgons themselves was a trio of monsters, but their sisters, that directly act as their double in the myth of Perseus? The Graiai – the monstrous trio of old women sharing one eye and one tooth. Hesiod also drops the fact that Ladon (the dragon that guarded the golden apples of the Hesperids), and Echidna (the snake-woman that mated with Typhon and became known as the “mother of monsters”) were also children of Phorcys and Ceto, while other authors will add other monster-related characters such as Scylla (of Charybdis and Scylla fame), the sirens, or Thoosa (the mother of Polyphemus the cyclop). Medusa herself is technically a “mother of monsters” since she birthed both Pegasus the flying horse and Chrysaor, a giant. So here is something very important to get: Medusa, and the Gorgons, were part of a family of monsters. Couple that with the absence of any mention of curses in these ancient texts, and everything is clear.
Originally Medusa was not a woman cursed to become a monster: she was born a monster, part of a group of monster siblings, birthed by monster-creating deities, and she belonged to the world of the “primordial abominations from the sea”, and the pre-Olympian threats, the remnants of the primordial chaos. It is no surprise that the Gorgons were said to live at the edge of the very known world, in the last patch of land before the end of the universe – in the most inhuman, primitive and liminal area possible. They were full-on monsters!
Now you might ask why Poseidon would sleep with a horrible monster, especially when you recall that the Greeks loved to depict the Gorgons as truly bizarre and grotesque. It wasn’t just snake-hair and petrifying gaze: they had boar tusks, and metallic claws, and bloated eyes, and a long tongue that constantly hanged down their bearded chin, and very large heads – some very old depictions even show her with a female centaur body! In fact, the ancient texts imply that it wasn’t so much the Gorgon’s gaze or eyes that had the power to turn people into stone – but that rather the Gorgon was just so hideous and so terrifying to look at people froze in terror – and then literally turned into stone out of fear and disgust. We are talking Lovecraftian level of eldritch horror here. So why would Poseidon, an Olympian god, sleep with one of these horrors? Well… If you know your Poseidon it wouldn’t surprise you too much because Poseidon had a thing for monsters. As a sort of “dark double” of Zeus, whereas Zeus fell in love with beautiful princesses and noble queens and birthed great gods and brave heroes, Poseidon was more about getting freaky with all sorts of unusual and bizarre goddesses, and giving birth to bandits and monsters. A good chunk of the villains of Greek mythology were born out of Poseidon’s loins: Polyphemus, Antaios, Orion, Charybdis, the Aloads… And even his most benevolent offspring has freaky stuff about it – Proteus the shapeshifter or Triton half-man half-fish… So yes, Poseidon sleeping with an abominable Gorgon is not so much out of character.
Step 3: The missing link
Now that we established what Medusa started out as, and what she ended up as… We need to evoke the evolution from point Hesiod to point Ovid, because while people summarized the Medusa debate as “Sea-born monster VS raped and punished woman”, there is a third element needed to understand this whole situation…
Yes Ovid did invent the rape. But he did not invent the idea that Medusa had been cursed by Athena.
The “gorgoneion” – the visual and artistic motif of the Gorgon’s head – was, as I said, a grotesque and monstrous face used to invoke fright into the enemies or to repel any vile influence or wicked spirit by the principle of “What’s the best way to repel bad stuff? Badder stuff”. Your Gorgon was your gargoyle, with all the hideous traits I described before – represented in front (unlike all the other side-portraits of gods and heroes), with the face being very large and flat, a big tongue out of a tusked-mouth, snake-hair, bulging crazy eyes, sometimes a beard or scales… Pure monster. But then… from the fifth century BCE to the second century BCE we see a slow evolution of the “gorgoneion” in art. Slowly the grotesque elements disappear, and the Gorgon’s face becomes… a regular, human face. Even more: it even becomes a pretty woman’s face! But with snakes instead of hair. As such, the idea that Medusa was a gorgeous woman who just had snakes and cursed-eyes DOES come from Ancient Greece – and existed well before Ovid wrote his rape story.
But what was the reason behind this change?
Well, we have to look at the Roman era again. Ovid’s tale of Medusa being cursed for her rape at the hands of Neptune had to rival with another record collected by a Greek author Apollodorus, or Pseudo-Apollodorus, in his Bibliotheca. In this collection of Greek myths, Apollodorus writes that indeed, Medusa was cursed by Athena to have her beautiful hair that seduced everybody be turned into snakes… But it wasn’t because of any rape or forbidden romance, no. It was just because Medusa was a very vain woman who liked to brag about her beauty and hair – and had the foolish idea of saying her hair looked better than Athena’s. (If you recall tales such as Arachne’s or the Judgement of Paris, you will know that despite Athena being wise and clever, one of her main flaws is her vanity).
“Wait a minute,” you are going to tell me, “The Bibliotheca was created in the second century CE! Well after Greece became part of the Roman Empire, and after Ovid’s Metamorphoses became a huge success! It isn’t a true Greek myth, it is just Ovid’s tale being projected here…” And people did agree for a time… Until it was discovered, in the scholias placed around the texts of Apollonios of Rhodes, that an author of the fifth century BCE named Pherecyde HAD recorded in his time a version of Medusa’s legend where she had been cursed into becoming an ugly monster as punishment for her vanity. We apparently do not have the original text of Pherecyde, but the many scholias referring to this lost piece are very clear about this. This means that the story that Apollodorus recorded isn’t a “novelty”, but rather the latest record of an older tradition going back to the fifth century BCE… THE SAME CENTURY THAT THE GORGONEION STARTED LOSING THEIR GROTESQUE, and that the face of Medusa started becoming more human in art.
[EDIT: I also forgot to add that this evolution of Medusa is also proved by strange literary elements, such as Pindar's mention in a poem of his (around 490 BCE) of "fair-cheeked Medusa". A description which seems strange given how Medusa used to be depicted as the epitome of ugliness... But that makes sense if the "cursed beauty" version of the myth had been going around at the time!]
And thus it is all connected and explained. Ovid did invent the rape yes – but he did not invent the idea of Athena cursing Medusa. It pre-existed as the most “recent” and dominating legend in Ancient Greece, having overshadowed by Ovid’s time the oldest Hesiodic records of Medusa being born a monster. So what Ovid did wasn’t completely create a new story out of nowhere, but twist the Greek traditions of Athena cursing Medusa and Medusa having a relationship with Poseidon, so that the two legends would form one and same story. And this explains in retrospect why Ovid focuses so much on describing Medusa’s beautiful hair, and why Ovid’s Minerva would think turning her hair into snake would be a “punishment fit for the crime”: these are leftovers of the Greek tale where Medusa was punished for her boasting and her vanity.
CONCLUSION
Here is the simplified chronology of how Medusa’s evolution went.
A) Primitive Greek myths, Hesiodic tradition: Born a monster out of a family of sea-monsters and monstrous immortals. Is a grotesque, gargoylesque, eldritch abomination. Athena has only an indirect conflict with her, due to being Perseus’ “fairy godmother”. Has a lovely romance with Poseidon.
B) Slow evolution throughout Classical Greece and further: Medusa becomes a beautiful, human-looking girl that was cursed to have snake for hair and petrifying eyes, instead of being a Lovecraftian horror people could not gaze upon. Her conflict with Athena becomes direct, as it is Athena that cursed her due to being offended by her vain boasting. Her punishment is for her vanity and arrogant comparison to the goddess.
C) Ovid comes in: Medusa’s romance with Poseidon becomes a rape, and she is now punished for having been raped inside Athena’s temple.
[As a final note, I want to insist upon the fact that the story of Medusa being raped is not less "worthy" than any other version of the myth. Due to its enormous popularity, how it shaped the figure of Medusa throughout the centuries, and how it still survives today and echoes current-day problems, to try to deny the valid place of this story in the world of myths and legends would be foolish. HOWEVER it is important to place back things in their context, to recognize that it is not the ONLY tale of Medusa, that it was NOT part of Greek mythology, but rather of Roman legends - and let us all always remember this time Poseidon slept with a Lovecraftian horror because my guy is kinky.]
EDIT:
For illustration, I will place here visuals showing how the Ancient art evolved alongside Medusa's story.
Before the 5th century BCE: Medusa is a full-on monster
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From the 5th century to the 2nd century BCE: A slow evolution as Medusa goes from a full-on monster to a human turned into a monster. As a result the two depictions of the grotesque and beautiful gorgoneion coexist.
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Post 2nd century BCE: Medusa is now a human with snake hair, and just that
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