#i have a tendency to ramble on down here about whatever comes to mind

[yandere-wishes]

Long ramble anon here, I'm happy you liked my long ask I was just concerned that I put way too much as I have a tendency to hyperfixate snd overexplain, hence the tldr at the end. To be honest ever since seeing the fox beastman I've been on a bit of a kick with theorizing things for him. (Did the same thing with Rollo hehe) Anyway, if you want some more of my takes I'm happy to share.

Alright so you know how beastmen retain some of their animalistic traits? Well my brain immediately goes to what this means for their romantic endeavors and courting behaviors. Not much is known about the courting process for foxes, but we do know that scent marking and loud vocal barking is used to attract a mate. How does this carry over to a humanoid fox? Well, my theory is that he will likely give his darling something like his coat, or spray whatever cologne he uses on their things or use more of it when he knows he's going to see them. As for the loud vocal barking you better believe my mind immediately went to him just belting out a serenade for his darling, regardless of how he actually may sound I think he's self-assured and prideful enough to believe this would definitely entice his soon to be mate.

Another interesting thing about foxes is that they are monogamous to a fault, rarely ever taking another mate after the passing of their partner, instead remaining loyal until their own passing (at least this was what I've read in my admittedly surface level research). To me this means two things, 1) once Fellow sets his eyes on a darling that's absolutely it for him regardless of how he has to get them by his side it is an inevitability so if they would just be a good dear and surrender early on everything could be so much better, and 2) should anything unfortunate befall to his darling he wouldn't ever fall for anyone else and likely never fully recover emotionally.

Tldr; The fox man would woo his darling with his surely illustrious (at least to him) voice and his cologne or perhaps natural pheromones, and once he woos them Fellow would never so much as look at another in the same light.

Don't apologize Anon!! I love it when people send in long asks about their hyperfixations!! It feels so endearing and sweet and makes me want to give you a big hug!! I'm literally the same when it comes to hyperfixate and overexplain, when I'm obsessed with something (TV show, movie, game, etc) I need to feel it in my veins!! Plus being able to chat about it with people on Tumblr is always one of the best parts!!

I can't stop laughing at the thought of Fellow sending his darling with loud obnoxious barking 🤣🤣 Bonus points if the reader is a regular human and just stares at him confused, while Leona, Ruggie, and Jack just nod in approval in the background (or in anger and disbelief, depends on the scenario). The idea of him sharing his cologne and jacket with Reader is actually really sweet. I like to think that some ways down the line if Fellow ever had to go away for an extended period of time. Reader would just cuddle into a corner hugging his jacket and spraying some of his cologne on herself. He'd be so delighted coming home and smelling his scent so strongly on his beloved.

I love this!! Just Fellow knowing that reader is the one from the first look 😍😍😍😍 He's so smitten and lays on the charm extra thick. Wanting them all so badly and doing anything to get them. If Reader should die (Lord forbid) Fellow definitely wouldn't get another partner BUT he'd also go the extra mile and try to resurrect them. Magic exists in Twisted Wonderland so I'm sure someone out there has the ability to raise the dead. He'd do absolutely anything to hold you in his arms again.

Look Reader is getting a really sweet deal here. A tall handsome man (+ bonus he comes with A SUPER FLUFFY TAIL AND EARS) with a smooth voice, and a charming personality. Willing to give her anything, do anything for her, and make sure she had the best life imaginable. He's physically incapable of cheating and would fawn over the reader like a lovestruck puppy. He's literally just perfect!! Ignoring the manipulative tendencies, obsessive behavior, and ability to maim someone with his teeth😊😊

[boombambaby]

Small little ramble rant thingy.

I’ve been writing since 2005, first on MySpace, and AIM, then facebook, livejournal for a minute, and roleplayer etc. (I know, I’m really aging myself.) and obviously, when I started out I had no idea what I was doing. My replies were gibberish, I was learning as I went — but I never really felt like I adopted a ‘writing style’ that I could say I perfected, you know?

Not to toot my own horn, but I think I’ve gotten better as the years went on and I’m pretty proud of my vocabulary, cadence, spelling etc etc. But I still tend to adopt the style of my partners and those I wrote with and don’t have a single, solitary style that I keep up with myself. I think.

Which makes me doubt my writing and compare myself to other writers, and that’s never a good thing. That’s when the doubt trickles in, and I get in my head and worry that others will get bored or tired of me, and it’s just— it’s so stressful.

I brought up writing on other sites like MySpace and roleplayer because those sites focus more on the para/novella aspect of it, which is what I ‘grew up’ on. I tend to go into detail about characterization, and what my character is thinking, feeling, what their last action was and how I follow through. The mood, the background etc. I go into way more detail than I should and I have a tendency to ramble in the first place, so by the time I’ve really sat and put out a reply, it’s several paragraphs long. (As you can tell with this supposed ‘short ramble’).

I started that way here and when I was pretty new, I’m not sure who it was but I had an anon inbox me that I shouldn’t write ‘big scary’ starters that are more than a paragraph because it makes people nervous, that they’ll have to match my writing and won’t be able to, etc.

Since then I have worked on toning it down— and it’s a struggle. But I’ve managed, kinda.

I struggle now with how to start things. Should I start with a quote, or an action. Should I lead into it with a background description or a general idea of what’s happening so whoever I’m writing with gets a solid picture— BUT DON’T OVERDO IT! That paragraph is too long, take something out.

It’s stressful at times and it makes me doubt myself a lot.

Another habit I used to have, that I’m going to get back into in the new year, is writing out a reply and then leaving it for an hour, two hours or whatever and coming back to it with fresh eyes. Rereading it and editing it, reworking how I worded something, making tiny changes. It made for a more cohesive reply that I was much more proud of.

I know a lot of people take time with their replies here and go over them to fine tune and edit with graphics before they post, and I adore how easily it comes to some writers to put out a single paragraph that perfectly describes what’s happening in a scene, what their character is thinking and include dialogue, you guys are incredible. Seriously. But for some reason I’ve always felt like. . . . I need to get something out, AS FAST AS I CAN and if I’m not posting on the dash whether it’s commentary or replies or memes or whatever, then they’ll all forget about me and loose interest. I know it’s not true but it’s in the back of my mind at all times.

I’m always worried I’m violating someone’s rules unknowingly (I’m lucky if I remember to bring my lunch to work let alone remember the 200+ followers I have’s rules) or that I’m doing something that annoys someone, or not writing enough for x. And then sometimes you receive a meme or prompt starter thing in your inbox, and you think up this reply that you’re really proud of, and it’s great and you’re excited to get it out— especially if you don’t interact with them often— and then. . . nothing. No reply. What was the point? And then I feel bad if I think about reusing that idea/set up for someone else so I gotta think up a new thing and it’s just, ugh.

It feels like a popularity contest sometimes? But also not. It’s all in my head and I know I’m thinking WAY too hard about a fun hobby that’s just supposed to be an escape from the stressors of RL, but I’m the type of person who’s a perfectionist— I like to make sure I’m at the top of my game, and to know I’m putting my best out there. I need to do better at putting a handle on my emotions/how much I read into things, and do better at getting my ideas actually written down so I can put them out. I need to do better at finding my style and sticking with it, so I can keep a hold of that confidence and stop this self doubt (that I’ve always had, even in and especially in rl).

But sometimes it’s hard. And then rl hits and makes you stress too, and you’re stressed here and there and then you have something bad happen at work and you just want to lay down in the bed in the dark and not move for a solid week but oh look you’re out of sick time and you gotta start working overtime if you want that next vacation.

Anyways.

I’ll shut up. Just getting my end of the year thoughts out and off my chest.

This is literally just me being a stress monster and over thinking everything. Not about a single person or any one thing that’s happened here or anywhere else. I’m just a happy mess!

If you made it this far, thanks for listening to my depressing rant!

[izzysillyhandsy]

Ed and Izzy: Cleaning up the mess

As of the end of Ep7, Ed has left Stede and his whole life behind because "he doesn't even know who he is". And I'd like to suggest in this rambling essay that Ed's journey to self-knowledge and self-love can't properly begin before he's come to terms with what happened with Izzy.

Although Ed has steadily been trying to make amends, at the start of Ep6 he's still feeling unsettled and guilty as hell about the terrible things he did (was capable of!): killing his dad, condemning his whole crew to certain death, Izzy's toe, shooting Izzy, being "killed" by Jim and the crew with Izzy looking on...

There's a surprising amount of Izzy in Ed's flashback (I was honestly surprised the toe cutting made it in - somehow the whole discussion around "Izzy deserving it" made me think Ed thought so as well? But of course he doesn't think that. Izzy does.)

And while Ed's central conflict is his underlying self-hatred and self-doubt, there still is a daily reminder of all of his worst tendencies and (still very recent) acts right under his nose.

I think I got all the poison out of my system...

...or not. The indestructible fucker's still here.

Izzy is Ed’s walking and talking guilt room and no amount of deflecting, story-telling or sugarcoating can turn that poison into positivity.

Stede, I love you for your sometimes naive, sweet outlook on life (and Ed does too), but Ed and Izzy, that’s years and years of love and devotion, resentment and hate, building each other up and tearing each other down. They’ve just come out of the absolute worst breakup in history, with so many things unsaid and unknown they’d need the whole of S3 to talk it through.

Stede applying his motivational poster line to Izzy of all people is a little bit tone deaf, especially because it happens right while Izzy’s singing a bittersweet love song about/to Ed.

Which he continues, in French, while Ed and Stede are having sex for the first time so that's definitely not helping. I wonder how good Ed's French is, but it is honestly almost comical to imagine Ed cheating on Iz making love to his new boyfriend while his ex is singing his heart out about „It's only him for me, and me for him, for life - he told me, he swore to me, for life“.

So Izzy's still here. Izzy is still visibly hurting, physically (your fault!!) and mentally (your fault as well in so many ways). And you're already over it and having fun with your new boyfriend? Of course not.

Whatever they were/are to each other specifically, Ed and Izzy were as good as married. They spent almost every day together for decades. Izzy let himself be maimed and hurt over and over again out of love and loyalty. And Ed feels very, very guilty about it. Even if this guilt is not the first thing constantly on Ed's mind, it's certainly there in the background, simmering.

On the other hand, Izzy is the one who kept Ed stationary - they had a good, secure (for pirates anyway) life together, why risk change? I don't think Izzy had noticed (or wanted to notice) how bad it'd gotten for Ed for a long time. So there's also a lot of resentment there from Ed's side, all tied up with Izzy.

It's a very complicated mess and I think that all this is at least part of the reason for Ed's confusion and need to... just go.

But that's not all, by far.

History repeating itself...

...maybe this seems a bit familiar?

We don't know a lot of Ed&Izzy's backstory (apart from: it's a long one!), but I think it's (almost) canon that it is Izzy's job to make sure Ed is content and safe and, most importantly, to kill for Ed.

And even though their relationship (whatever it was) probably didn't start out as tender and sweet as Ed/Stede, I think they started out much more carefree and happy, possibly excited and adventurous. Until their lifestyle took a toll on both of them - Izzy as Ed's killer and constant protector and Ed as Blackbeard, who Ed started to resent more and more. In the end, all that was left were two broken people in a codependent relationship.

Now it seems like gentle, sweet Stede is slowly turning into Izzy 2.0 - swearing (as far as I remember, Stede almost never said fuck in S1), becoming a "real pirate", and worst of all, killing for Ed even though Ed almost begged him not to (seems familiar?).

Plus, this is happening when Ed, still freshly traumatized from his stint as pirate extreme wants nothing to do with violence in general and piracy specifically. Least of all he wants Stede damaged (or izzyfied).

Stede seemed like a way out of pirating, a chance for a loving, fulfilling relationship. Maybe even a way out of his relationship with Izzy, who I think Ed (subconsciously?) blames for the destructive path his life had taken.

Now he isn't so sure anymore if Stede actually wants this.

Talk it through...

...eventually, maybe. Hopefully.

Of course, not every obstacle Ed has to face, every step on the road to self-love and happiness is about Izzy. Vice versa, Izzy is much more than his relationship with Ed, and he has his own problems independent from him.

But this "marriage" with Izzy was Ed’s longest and most important relationship, and also the last relationship before Stede. The way their relationship became restrictive, damaging and unescapable in the end was both their faults. It'd be quite natural if Ed was a bit cautious with that kind of history. Am I a person who always ends up like this? How did we fuck up this badly? Is there a way out?

Most importantly though, a lot of Ed’s guilt and self-doubt is wrapped up in Izzy - if you're capable of doing that (and that, and that) to the person you love - what else are you capable of?

In conclusion, Ed and Izzy need real closure, one way or the other. Before that happens, Ed won't be happy on any way he chooses, and certainly not in his relationship with Stede.

At the moment, they're not talking, really. It's incredibly sweet though, the way they make these little concessions towards the other (Izzy doing much more than Ed, as per usual). They're almost shy, asking for advice, giving reassurance and understanding, and sharing bottles, smiles and looks.

Will they get a long heart-to-heart in the finale? Of course not, there's not enough time. I think we might get a symbolic moment though.

Ed already knows Izzy loves him. Izzy really doesn't know (on top of everything else, poor kid). The only thing he got from Ed was the "Sorry 'bout your leg", even the latch got a bit more.

Izzy needs to hear that too. "It's not your fault you're broken. You didn't break you. Just trying to do your job, weren't you?"

(btw, I love that Ed is softly blowing onto the latch here, while Izzy is doing the same to his little shark <3)

It's also possible Izzy will get his "I loved you, best I could" in person. Hopefully not exactly in those words. But, for both of them, this will be a start to open proper communication (which might happen offscreen between seasons).

And when we get S3, Ed will be (more) prepared to embark on his journey to happiness, with or without Izzy by his side.

[bitterkarmaa]

*KICKS DOWN YOUR DOOR* HI I HAVE MORE RAYS RAMBLES TO SHARE.

I hope i'm not bothering with more ramble because this boy gives me so many brain worms you have no idea- ANYWAY full disclaimer this is all headcanon i've got for him AND IF YOU DEEM IT NON-CANON THAT IS FINE 100% I AM FINE WITH IT! PLEASE FEEL FREE TO CORRECT ANY MISINTERPRETATIONS I'VE MADE!

SO-

I've made some slight hints toward it in my writing already and have only now worked up the courage to share it in full hjdkfg so- I'm kinda playing on a general DCA headcanon i have that DCA models mainly Sun and Moon ones need counterparts in order to basically function. Because that is how they were designed, two halves of a whole that were made to exist together.

So a Sun needs their Moon and a Moon their Sun. Or a Moon their Moon or a Sun their Sun. Eclipse's included! The main point is there's gotta be two (or more) DCA models who are 'imprinted' or 'bonded' in order to properly function (Ruin would be mostly exempt ofc due to the two being one)

NOW WHERE DOES RAYS COME INTO PLAY HERE? So as i rambled about on A03 in the comments of Canary and Crow, i had a headcanon that Rays had 'imprinted' onto Lord Eclipse because, he is technically a Sun who lost his counterpart, that being Moon. So baby Rays, fresh and new sees Eclipse - possibly still a DCA model himself before changing his form - and automatically imprints onto him!

And this ends up carrying over to KB Eclipse and again, possibly Veil too because they are both of the same/similar ai that Rays own code has logged as being his natural other half (and counterpart relations can be whatever really, siblings, friends, family, partners whatever but ofc in this situation its 100% family or siblings)

And this is why i've written Rays to be so attached to Eclipse and why he seeks his company first and foremost when he feels lonely. And again this could later extend to Veil too! (Because i have not forgotten that oneshot where Rays comforts Veil and mourns with him that broke me Shep IT BROKE ME- /pos)

Anyways thankyou for attending my ted talk i shall now disappear into the cosmos!

I love your rambles honestly- it astonishes me that I’ve made characters that people find are WORTHY of rambling about 🥹❤️ it means a lot to me that Rays means so much to some people :)

I could defiantly see Veil “imprinting” on Rays as a sort of younger brother, for sure! Veil has a lot of emotions that he doesn’t understand and Rays being so gentle and patient with him would really give him brownie points in Veil’s eyes.

The drabble with Rays and Veil mourning was meant to be a sort of introduction into how both of them are accepting that vulnerable side of themselves that they’ve tried to ignore for so long, which would foster a sense of security for Veil since he’s still learning how to let people in (he’s still ahead of Eclipse on that one though LMAO) and accept that he’s ALLOWED to be different from Eclipse. He is, quite obviously, a lot more open-minded than Eclipse is. He may not ENJOY negative emotions, but he’s willing to learn and experience them in order to become a better person.

Eclipse…is not.

The main difference between Veil and Eclipse is that Veil is actively trying to better himself, while Eclipse is doing it without realizing and still has violent, sociopathic urges that others use as reasons to avoid him or discredit the progress he HAS made. Except for Rays, which is why Eclipse has a certain fondness for him, and tries to reign in his frightening tendencies in order to stay on his “good side.”

Rays knows Eclipse is struggling with something, but is too afraid to push it or ask questions.

Eclipse wants to do better for Rays, so he keeps his problems to himself in order to avoid scaring him.

Veil wants to understand himself in order to prove he can be different from Eclipse.

It all goes in cycles between the three, which is why their dynamic is going to be so interesting and unique when their arc begins later on, after Veil is introduced into the main storyline.

Do with this what you will :)

[cl0wnc4rzz]

oh PLEASE talk about your McCormick family hcs

YES OMG OKAY

so just letting yk that i am... not sure how to format this 😭 and i do have a tendency to ramble so very sorry if this is messy 💔

starting off w kevin :^)

as teens, kevin and kenny pick up a lot of jobs together. these two have worked all over the place!! especially kevin, who's dropped out of high school so he could work more hours.

related to the hc above!! kenny has thought about dropping out just like his older brother but kev basically won't let him lol. wants to see his younger siblings succeed.

as soon as he's able to, kev plans to leave his parents' house and plans to take his siblings with him as well.

he often avoids just 𝘣𝘦𝘪𝘯𝘨 home because his parents are complete assholes. it's smth that pisses kenny off immensely, even if he's guilty of the same thing sometimes. still, ken wishes he'd be there when things get rough rather than just leave him and their sister to deal with it

kenny!!

lord i have so many kenny hcs but i'll try to keep this exclusively mccormick family related

i kind stole this one from frazier uhm. if u see this frazier hi. but as soon as kev realizes ken is into stan he will not stop teasing him about it 😭 calls stan nicknames like "edward" or "L" when referring to him to kenny. ie: "hey ken when's gerard way comin over". kenny's genuinely amazed by the amount of nicknames he comes up with

HE 👏 IS 👏 KAREN'S 👏 BIGGEST 👏 FAN👏 ....he has a wall in his room dedicated to drawings, bracelets, or whatever karen's made for him!!

kenny's parka is a hand-me-down from kevin. in fact, a good chunk of his closet is hand-me-downs. the jacket itself is way to big on him so it lasts him quite a while but by the time he outgrows it that thing is on it's last thread lol

kenny has and always will be shorter than kevin. was genuinely shocked when karen ended up growing taller than him too, even if by a little LOL

kev taught him how to drive!! unfortunately they share a car and since kev is rarely home he rarely gets the chance to drive it... not that he minds much. stan, kyle, and cartman usually drive him around anyways

last but not least, karen :3

constantly babied by the other 2 even into her teen years. was fine as a little kid but eventually it kinda drives her insane, makes her feel like they don't take her seriously

about freshman year of high school she decides she wants to get raccoon stripes!! her and kenny sat around watching a couple tutorials before he helped her dye them

HER AND KENNY LOVE TO GOSSIP!! even tho they are in different grades and age groups, these 2 love sharing w each other what's happening w ppl the other prob doesn't even know 😭 kenny is out here hating on random 9th graders he doesn't even know LOL

because of their age gap, kevin often feels more like a father figure to karen than a brother, especially with how little their own father does for them

this post is already very long so i'm gonna stop there 😭 but hi yes i care a lot about the mccormicks

[likesunsetorange]

I’m a e2l fan so I want anything you could give us about it like characters likes /dislikes ? Small snippet (sorry Im so excited for this fic I’m asking for alot :,(no pressure though <3)

love you hope you’re doing good

hiii! you're so sweet, ily2! i'm mostly good! a little stressed bc school but i'm keeping it pushing haha

and you're not asking for a lot!! i've actually been talking a lot about this au with a few of my moots lately so i've been itching to share about it so honestly go crazy with asking about it!!! since i haven't gotten as many asks about this au i guess i'll make this ask kind of long and just kind of dump some of the stuff from my notes into it? and i have a tiny snippet i can share too!

so i'll just go on a long ass tangent below lol

okay, so first thing about this au, the one thing i really want to emphasize (without spoiling) is the whole thing about this au is that their breakup reason is important, but also that nobody in particular is at fault. sometimes life just happens, and things happen, and sometimes you just need to take a step back and re-evaluate yourself, your goals, and what you really want! it's about coming back together and choosing that person in the end because you realize not being with them is worse than whatever drove y'all apart!

tbh a lot of this au is partially inspired by my own breakup & how the experience of me getting over it! i was in my early 20s for the first time being single after being in a relationship since i was a teenager and i was like woah wtf idk how to be single/without a partner. so that's a big focus of that! learning how to find yourself and realign your goals and all that!

but we can get into the characters now!

eren:

definitely is a bit more obvious about missing mikasa, but tries to act like he doesnt (he has her highlight still up lol, not doing a good job at it)

mostly just works a lot while they're not together

after they breakup, mikasa moves out of their apartment, so he's stuck seeing all their stuff all the time

the first time they see each other its messy, they get into a big fight lol, they aren't allowed to hang out together lol

but he realizes pretty fast that he regrets the breakup, but he sees that mikasa seems to be doing okay, so he wouldn't wanna intrude on that

he gets armin in the breakup basically (mostly bc he sees armin more, but armin still talks to mikasa, just not as much as he does to eren obvi)

he picks up some of mikasa's hobbies bc he misses her so much lol he's down horrendous

at the very least does miss mikasa at least as a friend

mikasa

after their breakup, because she's kind of trying to spite eren, she starts going out a lot to cope—her "hot girl era" essentially lol

she definitely starts prioritizing herself a lot more, and spends more time with her friends and figuring out what she wants outside of eren

but she definitely misses eren, she's just better at hiding it lol

she partially thinks he just doesn't want anything to do with her anymore (a lot of this is just them being fucking idiots lol), and she basically doesn't try to stalk him or see what he's up to bc she doesn't wanna know out of her own peace of mind

she has very bad flight anxiety so when they fly to italy, she lowkey kind of hopes that eren doesn't change his flight (he does bc he has to do something not even to be petty), and she has a very terrible flight experience and all she wishes is that eren were there

and here's a little snippet! this takes place the day after they break up!! sorry for rambling LOl but hope you enjoyed my little tangent! :)

“Damn, Mikasa,” Gabi called out from behind her, only causing Mikasa to turn around. “We didn’t know you went out on weeknights.” 

Gabi, one of the college freshmen who worked at the gallery, had a tendency to say whatever was on her mind, never bothering to filter herself. Even if Mikasa had grown rather close to her since she started working at the gallery in August, sometimes she wished Gabi would just shut up.

Mikasa scoffed, confused as to what even prompted her to say that. “What are you talking about, Gabi? And don’t cuss so loud, especially where guests can hear you.”

“Your eyes, they’re all red. Not to mention how bad your bags are,” she said, pointing to her eyes. “Seems like someone was a victim of Sunday Funday.”

Mikasa lifted a finger to touch her eye—still puffy, but from tears, rather than drinking.

“Gabi, you’re not supposed to say stuff like that—it’s rude,” Falco chimed in.

“Hey, it’s not my fault she can’t handle her alcohol,” she shrugged, turning back toward Mikasa. “It’s okay, Mikasa, the prettiest girls are always the biggest lightweights. But anyway, are you feeling okay? Does our favorite party girl need some Tylenol? A Liquid IV, maybe? Even a Gatorade?”

Was she supposed to answer honestly? Tell them that she had spent the entirety of her night crying because she and her boyfriend had broken up. That she was sure that the cops almost got called by their neighbors from how loud they were yelling at one another? That Sasha couldn’t even understand her when she called, telling her she needed somewhere to stay because she stormed out of their apartment, not even giving Eren the chance to finish his sentence, somewhere after one of them had uttered the words, “We shouldn’t be together anymore?”

She had been doing so well, pushing the thoughts to the back of her head, trying to get through the entirety of her shift without thinking about everything—about him. She only had an hour left in her shift, but all of her efforts had been to no avail.

It was as if the wind had been knocked out of her, she suddenly lost the ability to breathe, and she felt all the blood drain from her face.

We aren’t together. We aren’t together. We aren’t together. The words playing in her mind on loop.

“Hey, Mikasa. Are you okay?” Falco asked, his eyes flooding with concern as he looked over Mikasa’s current state.

“I think I’m gonna be sick,” she said quickly, before running off to the bathroom.

But maybe just this once, Mikasa was lucky for Gabi’s inability to shut her mouth—at least being hungover was a good enough cover for sobbing her eyes out in the bathroom.

[capricores]

Taurus x aquarius relationship compatibility?

typical disclaimer: i'm assuming you meant sun signs; this interpretation can change heavily based on the individual's other placements/natal chart as a whole

personally i love this pairing! i find taureans and aquarians tend to date each other like... surprisingly often, and it tends to last a while too. you would think they shouldn't ever work together, but they can! the fixed signs in general are very drawn to one another; tendency to ~fixate~ on one another and be completely enamored. i will say, though, if the taurus and aquarius aren't developed, or they don't have other favorable/harmonious synastry aspects, this will be a tough, tough relationship to make work.

additionally, if we were talking, say, taurus x aquarius venus, my answer would be a LOT different and way more unfavorable/negative.

here's why they work:

LOGICAL & INTELLIGENT | Both signs are very, very logical and straight-forward. They're blunt, say what's on their mind at all times, and think things through clearly + go over all possible options before forming their opinions. They can easily make decisions together, given they're on the same page, as they have similar thought processes and logical natures. Neither are extremely emotional, which they will appreciate about one another, especially when it comes to potential disagreements, planning life together, and so forth.

INTENSITY | Two fixed signs always brings a lot of intensity in a relationship. They are stubborn, intense and thoughtful. When they really, really like someone and commit, it is a serious, life-long thing for them. Fixed signs (esp Taurus/Scorpio) tend to have a "date to marry" mindset, so when two of them fall for one another, the relationship is very close-knit and the love is intense! These two can match one another's intensity when it comes to commitment and love. As fixed signs, there's a mutual intense fixation on one another.

EXPANDING HORIZONS | Because these two can be so opposite, it's part of why they can work well! They lack in some areas the other thrives in, and are able to learn from one-another a lot. Taurus teaches Aquarius the importance of being grounded, and paying attention to practical, material matters. Often a bit chaotic and scattered, Taurus brings Aquarius down to Earth and provides structure in their lives. On the other hand, Aquarius helps stubborn, scared-of-change Taurus embrace and explore new ideas and takes on life - opening up their mental spheres to new concepts they may have never considered before. They help them move out of their comfort zone, both mentally/emotionally, and physically.

here's why they don't:

VALUE MIS-ALIGNMENT | This is the biggest reason why this relationship could fail. Taurus and Aquarius are on completely different ends of the spectrum when it comes to values. Taurus generally honors tradition and is strong in their values, whatever those values may be. Aquarius hates tradition and does everything possible to go against the grain. It's very, very likely that they will have different and wildly mismatched views on commitment, relationships, home-life, etc. On top of that, Taurus might frequently feel embarrassed by how Aquarius acts in public; they may also not understand their rants/rambles/views in general and get annoyed at a lot of what they say; it will be frustrating and non-sensical to them; too idealistic and dreamer-like. On the other hand, Aquarius may find Taurus too stagnant and change-resistant (not that Aquarians are /that/ amazing with change, but better than Taurus, lol); they may also struggle having conversations with Taurus due to their slower speaking style and "dated" opinions/values. They may find Taurus too behind, and close-minded/stubborn compared to them.

STUBBORN & OPINIONATED | We have two fixed signs. They're both extremely stubborn, and both of these signs are very opinionated - and they don't hide that, either. There can end up being a lot of fights between these two because of their stubborn natures. Aquarius will likely get most annoyed; they'll feel like arguing with Taurus is like talking to a brick wall. Meanwhile Taurus will feel cornered and upset that Aquarius challenges their long-standing, grounded views.

FREE-SPIRIT VS SET IN STONE | Pretty self-explanatory, but Aquarius is free-spirited and often extroverted/outgoing. Taureans are grounded and generally introverted/homebodies. Aquarians generally enjoy going out and exploring the world - especially alone. This can trigger Taurus' jealous/possessive nature when it's happening so often - and can often make them feel deprived of the attention and quality time they need in a relationship. Taurus needs security and routine, Aquarius is unpredictable and spontaneous; there is a lot of clashing here. Aquarius may feel held back, judged or even manipulated by Taurus, whereas Taurus may end up feeling ignored, misunderstood and unloved by Aquarius.

similar posts: taurus x scorpio

astrology asks always open ♡

[tarot-by-e11e]

Hello!!! Elle✨

I am here to participate in your Intuitive game activity.

My initials - SHEY

My Favorite song(current fav) and Why -

"Patience" by Tame Impala

Its dreamy🫧music🎶 and thoughtful💭 lyrics📃 capture📸 the feeling🦋 of waiting⏳ and being patient🤌🏻creating🎨🖌️ a calming🌸 and reflective🪞 atmosphere🌿

My question - I'd love to get a general reading from you. Just whatever comes to your mind.

Hi SHEY,

Thank you so much for patiently waiting for your turn in my ask game.

I do apologize I wasn't able to include your name last night, it was a technical issue on my end. Don't worry, I added you back into the list and officially closed the game.

So starting with your song, the songs sound so chill and relaxing and when I check the lyrics seems dreamy and sort of sad.

Now for your general reading, the question that comes to mind is, "What do SHEY's guides want to tell SHEY?" They requested to do this in channeled messages format.

I'll list it down in bullet form for easier read:

"Is SHEY just being curious or does SHEY really want to know what we have to tell her?"

"Should we tell her about that time SHEY felt so embarrassed in public but really, no one even noticed or remembered?"

"SHEY's really hard on herself on things that she chose be burdened with. It's not SHEY's issue nor is it SHEY's problem to solve, yet why is she overextending herself for people who don't value and respect her?"

"Come on, I know this is a general reading, but we're (your spirit guides) are practically just rambling here?? There's no telling when will we ever get to chance to speak up again."

"Then tell SHEY she's being an idiot for forcing herself to fit into other people's molds and expectations are her."

"Yoooooo calm down, you might scare SHEY away. Let's be nicer about this, shall we?"

"Okay, SHEY needs a wake-up call for her perfectionistic procrastinating self-sabotaging tendencies. She knows she's capable of anything, yet her unrealistic standards for herself, makes her resentful for her ideals and her current ability."

"Seriously, what part of "be nice do all of you (your spirit guides) not realize?! Keep it nice and sweet."

"Okay, she's so sweet, loving, and secretly caring that her kindness is mistaken for weakness. That's why SHEY's become a chronic people pleaser."

"What the flipping duck do you all (your spirit guides) not know about the simple meaning of being *nice*?!"

(the rest of your spirit guides) "Well.... we didn't use swear words... So that's nice..."

(the actually nice spirit guide flips a table) "Universe?! Why did you assign with thissss *looks at the rest of your spirit guides as if they were vermins*"

"Hehe, the strict one lost its cool!! Anyway SHEY, stop guilt tripping yourself for things not being in your control. So as much as you want to save someone from the consequences of their own stupidity, you can't. They did need to learn their lessons and they need a good old fashion psychic backhanded bissh slap towards the brick wall, for thinking they can get away with harming and abusing you."

*nods spiritual heads in unison* "SHEY needs to stop being a push over!!" *the rest of your guides* "YEAH!!!!!!!!!!!"

"SHEY needs to do more self-care, that's beyond skincare" "oooohhh that's a good one".

"What else? oh! Don't give the so-called nice guy reformed player a chance.(this is future instance)"

"Is there anything else?" "Nope we all said what we need to say"

SHEY... your guides... they're wild and loud and cut throat.

Having to channel for all of them is giving a massive headache.

I'm sorry this is as far as I can pull for you.

Do let me know in your feedback how this resonates with you

[my-castles-crumbling]

Hi Cas! I’m, as you kindly dubbed, smiley anon 😊 I’m back!!! 

So I had the conversation. Thank you so much for your help. My partner knows I have good intentions but sometimes i get stressed talking about things- and mess up- and then they (ooooh- pronouns) freak out too.

There was one time, back when, where they used they/them pronouns (and experimented with style) and were SO euphoric. I took a bunch of pictures. So I sat down with them (with emotional support snacks and a film we love- if we have an argument that we think is out of love and wanting to help, we sit together in annoyed silence with a movie on. It’s our rule to stop us escalating arguments) and brought up the day and the photos. 

I planned out a bit of what I wanted to say (and what I wanted to not accidentally say) and I explained that they seemed happier when they were using they/them pronouns, at least from my view, but they were obviously free to pick whatever pronouns. 

Then I said that if they ever wanted to experiment more, switching it up, i’m super happy to help, but also, if this (he/him) is definitely what they want, then i’ll be happy to carry on. 

(I do possibly have a tendency to bring his family up. Mine were very unhelpful when I was discover my queerness so I like to point that out when other families do it- but thanks to your reminder I refrained- and that definitely prevented an argument). 

They said they’d enjoyed that day (with the photos) the most as well. Maybe we could try it again? So we did. And then again.

Currently me, and our three closest friends have gone to using they/them mostly with a little bit of he/him - as that was his preference (I haven’t used he/him here much as to not confuse you- but I am using the pronouns he wants) 

I’ve been careful to still use he/him sometimes, and I think they’re starting to shift stronger to they/them.

Yesterday they brought up their parents. It was like 3 months ago that the original switch from they/them to he/him at the parents house happened. 

They obviously want to see their parents again, and they want me to use he/him the whole time, which i’ve agreed to. 

They then asked me to try and slip talk about non-binary people into conversation… yep 

We have this rule that (with permission each time) we can use each other as scapegoats with our family. For missing awful events, or seeing old family members that’ve been shunned. Eg. “No, I don’t want to see your ex, my partner does, they were friends” - to my sister. Ex husband. They have a kid together so I wanted to stay in contact, since my sister was kinda the problem anyway. But that’s a story for another time. 

So we sat down together and came up with 3 ways (not that I have to use them all) I could casually bring up non-binary people, and then we’d both try and explain and defend them. Also their sister is kind of an ally, so we’re hoping to get her on our side or something. 

I’m aware this can go sideways, but hey, i’m happy that they’re trying to bring it all up to their family. Honestly I think they’re been more mature than I was when my family were dicks. 

(And aside from this, they’re parents are lovely people. Just not educated about non-binary people). 

Plus they do like me. So, you know, maybe they’ll listen to me. They call me “woke” and such as, but they don’t mind if I ramble about rights so it could be worse.

I’m a bit nervous. I trust my partner not to freak out or turn on me or get mad. But I do worry about his parents not reacting great to me trying to explain non-binary people, and then scaring them a little. Back to he/him. 

But most importantly, thank you Cas. 

I’m very aware I can come across as pushy and i’m quite blunt. I mean, i’ll be nice and all, but I don’t like to sugarcoat things. 

I often worry my partner will feel like i’m forcing them to come out faster, figure themselves out faster. Where as I just want them to have space from what I view as negative influences.

But, I have to remind myself that their relationship with their family is not the same as mine with mine.

Also, I decided to go with something fun to encourage them to get creative. Not to brag but I know my partner very well and they love colour and fun. 

So now you get a list of ways I tried to encourage experimenting. 

I bought stickers with a BUNCH of different pronoun variants on them. 

We work from home so I figured if they just put whatever sticker (or stickers) they felt like they wanted for pronouns that day- they wouldn’t feel weird about asking (also I wanted to be careful not to force only one set of pronouns- or leave them feeling unable to change their pronouns whenever)

2. I got badges. More generic. with different flags, pronouns and labels.

I wasn’t sure whether they’d want to say it outside or not. But in case they do, it can be affirming for a stranger to use your preferred pronouns for you (according to my friends). 

3. found an old, silly, little banner that says “Put your needs first” and hung it by our door.

And another that says “It’s okay to spend forever figuring yourself out”. (They made these FOR ME, back like 8 years ago, when we were just friends, and i was trying to put my internalised homophobia behind me so i could be queer and happy. i thought reminding them that they helped me would make them more comfortable to let me help them).

4. I made a list of all the thrift (+charity) shops nearby that me and our queer friends go to, so that they can look for new clothing.

We moved recently(ish) so we haven’t totally explored the whole area. 

They’ve been getting worried about spending money on this. I also nabbed some clothing from some of our friends, not permanently, but to help them figure out what they prefer. 

5. I LEARNT MAKEUP! I can do my normal makeup, but i’m terrible at detailed makeup. 

But i figured makeup is a big part of feeling like yourself, cause you can look more masculine or feminine of a good mix of both. I found some creators and learnt some tricks and now i’m like- not that bad! 

They’re enjoying my attempts at makeup A LOT.

They’ve seemed to really like everything i’ve done so far. I was subtle about it though, if they realise i’m actively doing things for them, they’ll freak out and say i’m too nice (which is dumb cause i’m not nice to many people- just them- and then like a few other ppl I deem acceptable). 

So anyway, we’re vibing with they/them most of the time and the occasional he/him. And we have dinner with their parents soon… where i’ll be trying to subtly teach them about non-binary people. 

SO. READY FOR THE PLOT TWIST? 

I want to meddle. I won’t and I expect you’ll tell me not to meddle and to just tell my partner but I have the meddling desire so i’m gonna say it. Ready? 

They should just tell their parents. My partners parents DO NOT CARE about problems in the world or anything really.

They only learnt about queer people for their child when they found out that they were queer, and they only learnt about the black lives matter protests back in lockdown when my partner‘s sister got engaged to a person of colour.

Don’t get me wrong, they’re very invested in the social injustices facing queer people and people of colour now. But they don’t care to learn unless it’s something their kids are actively involved in. 

So basically they only the put the effort in if they think their kids are involved. And they’re not quite smart enough to realise their kid might be non-binary.

The way I see it, the only way to get through to them, is if my partners honest.

BUT I will NEVER force them out and I don’t think they’re ready yet. So… I’m going to bring up non-binary people, their parents aren’t going to care at ALL (or worse, they’re gonna say something ignorant and upset my partner unknowingly) and then we’re all going to fall into awkward silence. 

So yeah. The conversation went well and we’re well but there’s some hiccups in the system 😊

(And, you know, if you have any advice for navigating this, feel free to dish it out. Thanks).

Also, LOVING Taylor’s album!!!!!!!!! There’s nothing like screaming I Can Do It With A Broken Heart, with my partner :)

Hi! <3

I just want to say, the things you have done for your partner are absolutely heartwarming. I'm sitting here like almost tearing up because it is so unbelievably clear how much you two love each other.

I think it's also clear that you both have great communication, and even though you WANT to do things a certain way, your partner has made their desires clear. And I have no doubts you'll respect them, because you respect THEM so much. And honestly, it is so cool to hear about how open and honest your relationship is.

You don't need my advice, hon, you're already doing everything right. Keep communicating, respecting your partner, and encouraging them. You're doing great <3

(YAS TTPD is AMAZING)

[arionaleilani]

arionawrites updated writeblr intro

who the hell am i?

my name is ariona! i also go by ari (common nickname), rio (occasional nickname), and whatever the hell else people wanna call me (within reason). fun fact, my childhood nickname was bird because when i started talking i apparently sounded like a parrot (:

i’m in my mid-twenties (23 as of posting this; turning 24 in march!) and i have been writing since i was in the second grade, or about 7-8 years old. i’ve wanted to be a published author since the fourth grade (10 years old). i have yet to achieve that “published” thing, but i’m working towards it every day and am hoping to have something published somewhere by the time i’m 25 (or while i’m 25, i’m not too picky lol)

i’m a chronically ill lesbian who tries to include type one diabetic characters in everything i write and almost exclusively write queer characters.

i currently work in before and after school childcare, though i am in the process of finding a new job that provides me better stability as well as the time to be able to focus on my writing more. my hope is some kind of office job, or, even better, something in a library!

what kind of things do i write?

it honestly depends on the vibes, man. i’m happy to write (almost) every genre so long as i have a story idea that fits it that i want to write. however, i do have some common things that i tend to write more often than the rest, such as:

queer romance (usually the romance part is not the primary focus, though i do have a sapphic romance novel in the works)

modern fantasy

coming of age

found family

complex and complicated family dynamics

i also have a tendency to post weird little ramble-y thought pieces in random points in time (would it count as poetry? i honestly don’t know). if you’re interested to seeing any of it, my writing tag is #ariwrites !! i’ll add the tag to this post as well for convenience sake!

what projects do i currently have?

so, here’s the thing: i struggle with completing things and tend to have a bunch of new ideas and kind of leave old ideas in the dust. because of this, i’ve decided to take almost all of my current projects and scrap them? actually, scrap isn’t the right word - i’m starting from scratch with a majority of them! i think there are some ideas that i can actually combine into one story rather than them being separate, and a lot of it is just a kind of conglomerated mess that i am in the process of detangling in order to move forward in a more coherent and structured way. however, i do have two projects that i am not starting from complete scratch. i am remaking the outlines for these two stories, though, and then rewriting them from the beginning!

here are those two projects:

rotten

a zombie apocalypse scenario that i originally started writing as a nanowrimo project in 2022 that i did not complete. matter of fact, i only got a couple of chapters in before the spark fizzled out. however, i love the characters i have created and the bones of the story i had in mind, which is why i am choosing to restructure the outline and try again. it will likely change quite a bit as i remake the outline and iron out the details in new ways, but the basic breakdown of the story is this: it’s three years into an apocalypse that has left a mere remnant of humanity in its wake. we have a cast of four main characters (maybe six, depending on how you look at it). one is an older brother taking care of his siblings, both of whom have yet to reach double digits in age. one is a grumpy pessimist who thinks it’s pointless building bonds when everyone else she knew before is almost definitely dead and anyone else she meets will end up dead, too. one is a former optimist who has been weighed down by the realism the apocalypse has forced upon him, who hates being alone (being lonely) but has been betrayed by every single person he has come across since the fight to survive began, and he doesn’t really know what to do about that anymore. one was raised privileged and pampered by a paranoid and eccentric millionaire who was also absolutely certain that doomsday was inevitable (hey, turns out he was right!) and therefore raised his daughter teaching her every survival skill he could and preparing her for the worst, so she is, realistically, the best person to have on your side in an apocalypse—and yet she has been alone the entirety of the three years. all of them are queer and all of them will have to learn that they can rely on one another after stumbling into each other’s lives. also, despite only one of them being the older brother of those kids, the other three will eventually come to an agreement that they would burn the rest of what’s left of the world if it meant keeping them warm, so that’s cool, i guess.

hot chocolate

this is the sapphic romance novel i mentioned above! started writing it on a whim with literally zero plan for it last year, made it my camp nano project, and somehow managed to hit 30k words before the lack of preparation caught up with me. the title is a working title and might change upon the rewrite, but i absolutely adore this story so far and am very excited to get an outline busted out so that i can get back to writing it. the breakdown is this: mallory james moves in with her big brother when she’s eighteen. it’s the summer after her graduation and every single plan that she had for her future has been rendered pointless and now she’s trying to find her footing in a life that is completely different from the one she had been living only a few months ago. her brother, eddie, is going to do his best to be there for her and help her heal, but mallory doesn’t want to heal. she doesn’t even want to acknowledge that there’s anything she needs to heal from. unsure of what to do next, she enrolls in the local community college and meets a few people who somehow manage to become her kinda sorta friends — ellie, ash, and bee. featuring sapphic love, healing from loss and family trauma, finding stability and reason in an unexpected place, and a side character who is definitely polyamorous but entirely unaware that that’s a thing he’s able to be.

alright, i think that’s all i want to put here! i’ll definitely edit this with updates as information changes and as old projects become new again and things like that, but it’s a new year (the fact that i’m posting this in february is absolutely not important at all) and i’m trying to make ‘24 something worthwhile. if you’ve read this far, thank you so much and i hope everyone is having an incredible day/night !!

[arsonmiss]

haiku | kazuha x reader

been having 5wirl brainrot lately (namely kazuha heizou n’ xiao) so expect fics of them!

content/charas: kazuha, gn reader with they/them pronouns, aether, xinyan, beidou, some alcohol, drunk reader, accidental confessions

You slumped over on your table at the tavern in Liyue, groaning into your food as you held your head in your hands. This was the what, fourth time this week you had avoided going on an expedition with Beidou and her crew? And it was namely all cause of one person.

Kaedehara Kazuha, the object of your affections. The (no longer) fugitive from Inazuma who caught your eye the minute he appeared, and had slowly been catching your heart the same as he stayed. The longer you two spent together, the stronger you felt, and you hated it.

You didn’t want to make things weird between you two. Kazuha was a nice person to have on the ship, and was even nicer to talk to when the rest of the crew was too drunk to form coherent sentences. He’d calmly listen to you vent or ramble about whatever you wanted, and that carved him a special place in your heart. A little too special, for your liking.

And that’s why you were at the tavern. You were trying to eat and drink your problems off your mind, something that usually worked for you, yet isn’t working at all now. As you were trying to think about what to do next, a familiar voice called out to you.

“Hey y/n! What are ya’ doin out here? I thought for sure you’d be with Beidou n’ her crew!” Xinyan called, walking over to your table with Aether behind her, yet no Paimon in sight. Guess he was off babysitting duty for the day.

“Oh. Hey Xinyan, hey Aether,” you said, looking up and trying to force a smile on your face. Obviously enough, it didn’t convince the two, as they looked at eachother and then sat down in front of you, Aether reaching a hand out towards you.

“Are you okay?” He asked, you blowing out a breath through your lips, sitting up and leaning your head on one hand, drumming your other on your forearm. You mused a way to answer without telling them exactly what’s wrong, because even though you trusted then to keep a secret, if Aether let even the tiniest think slip to his flying companion, may Morax help you.

“M’fine, it’s just… have you ever had super strong feelings you don’t know what to do with?” You asked, tilting your head a bit to put emphasis on your question.

Aether gave a nod, while Xinyan placed a hand on her chin in thought. “Yeah, all the time. Sometimes commissions are a lot for me, and the asking for help can get a little annoying… But I never mind it, so I just clear my emotions out whenever I need to fight monsters,” he said with a shrug, as if it was the most nonchalant thing in the world.

“…Okay, ignoring your borderline homicidal tendencies, I don’t think I have the stamina to fight anywhere near as many monsters as you do,” you said, waving on the thought without as second thought, Aether cocking his head at his “homicidal tendencies.”

“Hmm… Well, I normally just get my feelins’ out whenever I preform. Or if it’s somethin’ calmer, when I’m writin’ my songs,” she said, twirling her pick in her hand.

“Writing a song… maybe that’s not a bad idea…” you mused, rolling the thought around on your tongue, an idea coming to mind. Were you the most lyrically inclined? No, but you could write a poem. Kazuha’s rubbed off enough on you for you to be able to do that, right?

“Maybe it’s not! I’m glad I could help ya out, y/n. In exchange, you should come to my show later! I’ll be sure to get you a good spot! And Aether too, if he wants!” Xinyan exclaimed, turning to Aether and giving him a small nudge as she winked at you both.

Aether gave a small chuckle and turned to you, waiting for your response. “Well, I’m down to go either way. You, y/n?”

You thought it over for approximately four seconds before going “Ah, what the hell? Sure, I’ll go. Maybe some loud music is what I need to turn my brain off for a bit,” you said, smiling at the small cheer Xinyan gave.

“Great! Well then, I’ll see y’all at the show later! 9pm, don’t forget!” She said, standing up and waving. “I’ve gotta go practice, but I’ll see you two later!”

You and Aether waved at Xinyan as she left, before you turned back to the blonde, pushing your food to the side.

“So, I noticed you’re off babysitting duty. What’s up with that?”

“Huh…? Oh, Paimon! Well, it’s a long story…”

“Kazuha? Kazuha!” Beidou called, the boy in question snapping his head towards her, almost falling off his place on the edge of the ship. “What’s up with you, man? You’ve been distracted for the past couple of days,” she said, placing her hands on her hips, her body language showing slight annoyance but her face full of concern.

“Oh, have I? Sorry, just… thinking about some things,” he said, brushing off her words as he readjusted himself, moving further back on the edge of the ship, pulling a leaf out of his pocket.

“Hm… If you say so. Just remember, you’re welcome to drink with us any time if you need to get your mind off something. Make sure to tell y/n that too, if you see her. I haven’t seen them in a couple days,” she said, crossing her arms as she turned, preparing to walk off.

“And I’m sure they’re fine. You don’t have to worry about them so much, y’know? They’re a strong person, that’s why they’re on my crew,” she said, holding back a chuckle as she walked off, Kazuha’ face going red. Was he that easy to read? And if he was, did you already know? He tried to brush the thoughts off, playing a tune with his leaf. Xinyan had a show later, right? Maybe he’d go himself…

You were drunk. Not completely hammered, but definitely past the point of tipsy. Aether was trying to keep a close eye on you in the crowd, but man were the attendees as loud and rowdy as the music. He had managed to grab hold of your wrist a couple times, but you got separated by another show attendant almost immediately after. Maybe he didn’t completely get the day off babysitting.

Xinyan, on the other hand, was having the time of her life on the stage, as usual. She was belting her heart out to the music she was playing, sweat rolling down her forehead as fire blasted from the sides of the stage, curtesy of her own pyrotechnics.

Kazuha was off to the side sitting in a tree to get a view of the show and stay away from the crowd. He had learned before this was his preferred way to watch her shows, getting a good view and staying out of the way of any sudden mosh pits that might happen. He nodded his head to the music, closing his eyes and letting the guitar entrance his thoughts.

“Alright, everyone! Thank you all for comin! I hope you all enjoyed the show, and please be safe on your way out! I hope you’ll come an’ see my next one soon! Until then, rock on!” Xinyan exclaimed, striking a cord on her guitar as the crowd cheered one final time, before starting to exit the venue. Kazuha jumped down from his tree, before heading over to the stage, slipping around the back to where Xinyan was.

“Oh, Kazuha! I didn’t expect to see you here!” She said, her eyes lighting up at the sight of him, wiping her face with a towel while simultaneously drinking some water. “Ah, give me a sec, please…” she mumbled, hurrying to make herself presentable as he waved a hand, giving her a smile.

“No, don’t worry about it, I showed up unexpected. I just remembered you told me about this earlier, and I didn’t have much else to do, so I thought, why not?” He said, giving a small shrug as she laughed, stretching her arms out behind her.

“Well, I’m glad you did! Hey, Aether and y/n were here earlier too! I think they’re still here, and we’re supposed to do somethin’ together after this! Maybe you’d wanna come with us?” She asked, tilting her head at him as his eyes widened a bit.

You were at the show? And he’d get the chance to see you after your absence on The Crux? Well, maybe a little after party wouldn’t hurt… Besides, he could ask you where you’d been the past couple days. Everyone was worried about you… especially him.

While he was thinking of a response, Aether came running in a panic, calling your name frantically. “Y/n? Y/n! Kazuha, Xinyan, have you two seen y/n? They were with me in the crowd and at some point we got separated and now I can’t find them! Oh, I knew I shouldn’t have let them drink that much!” He rambled, clutching his hair in his fists as he paced, Xinyan going over and holding his shoulders.

“Aether, Aether! Calm down! Panicking isn’t going to help whatever’s happening! Now calm down n’ speak clearly, okay?” She said, nodding slowly as the blonde followed her movements, taking a deep breath and letting go of his hair, clenching his fists by his sides instead.

“Okay, okay… So, y/n got drunk before the show, right? I told them they should probably just go home and sleep it off, but they insisted they didn’t want to miss your show. I tried to stay close to them in the crowd, but with everyone pushing their way to the front, I lost them. I thought I could find them when everything started leaving, but I couldn’t see them anywhere! I don’t know where they went and they’re gone and I don’t know what to do!”

Both Kazuha and Xinyan’s eyes widened. You were drunk? And lost? That was most definitely not a good combo. Especially if you had gone outside of the city in your state. Kazuha spoke up immediately, blurting the first semi-thought through plan that came to mind.

“Okay, how about we split up to find them? If you find them, take them back to The Crux or Wangshu Inn, if they’ve managed to get that far. We’ll meet back up later to tell each other if we’ve found them, okay?” He suggested, the other two nodding almost immediately. It wasn’t like they had any other plans.

And so they split off, racing off into the night in different directions, shouting your name into the distance.

Kazuha went to the cliffs just next to the path towards the entrance to Liyue Harbor. It was a place you had showed him before, somewhere where you could see the whole city from above. It was especially nice during the Lantern Rite, where you could see all the lanterns float above the city into the night sky.

But he wasn’t here to think about that, he was here to find you. And his heart almost dropped once he saw your form crouched over in a ball at the place you were sitting. However, as he got closer, he heard soft snores coming from you, and he let out an audible sigh of relief.

That’s when he saw all the crumpled papers near you. What? He picked up a couple of them, attempting to make out the scribbled out messes, before eventually giving up, and looking at the one you had fallen asleep on top of.

It was an unfinished haiku. And from the looks of it, a confession. A blush covered his face, before an adoring smile grew, going over and picking up the scrapped pieces of paper surrounding you, placing them in his pouch, and gently lifting you sleeping form onto his back. You were a little heavy, but nothing he couldn’t handle. He’d have to be sure to tell Aether and Xinyan he found you later. And also make sure Aether wouldn’t start groveling at your feet for forgiveness. That would be awkward.

You groaned as you opened your eyes, still quite a bit tipsy from all your wine tasting earlier that night. You closed your eyes immediately after from exhaustion, and held on tighter to whatever was carrying you. It smelled nice, and warm, and familiar…

“Y/n? Are you awake?”

Hey, that sounded like Kazuha. And it smells like Kazuha.

It is Kazuha, isn’t it?

“Kazu…ha…?” You slurred out, opening your eyes again, now focusing on the white hair and partial view of his face.

“Yeah, it’s me. Are you okay? Does your head hurt?” He asked, your brain swirling to catch up. What was he doing here? Weren’t you supposed to be with Xinyan and Aether? Last thing you remember was her show and…

The memories came flooding back in. After her show, you resolved to take her advice from earlier and write a poem to express your feelings. After many failed attempts, you eventually settled on one haiku that needed a final line, but you couldn’t remember it.

“Kazuha, do you… my… poem…?” You attempted to ask, words falling from your barely coherent question. He nodded, looking forward again, attempting to hide his blush, not that you would notice in your state anyway.

“Yeah, I found it. It wasn’t quite done yet.

I love him so much.

Kaedehara Kazuha.

And that’s all you had, right?” He asked, you nodding in agreement.

“Yeah… couldn’t think of another line.”

“Well, I think I have one.”

“Huh?”

“And he loves me too.”

He finished your haiku with a blush, the only thing keeping him grounded being the humming you were doing right next to his ear.

“Hmm… Maybe… Wait…”

And your drunk brain finally clicked.

“Wait, Kazuha…? You really…?”

“I do, y/n. I have for a long time now.” He said, holding you closer to him, letting out a sigh at the huge weight that was off his chest.

“Man, really? You should’ve said something earlier… This wouldn’t have happened if you had…” you pouted, Kazuha giving a small chuckle at your reaction.

“Maybe not. Well, at least I know you’re safe now. Now c’mon, let’s take you back to the Crux. Everyone’s been worried about you, and there’s a nice warm bed waiting for you there,” he said, your eyes lighting up at the thought of a bed.

“Oh, a bed sounds really nice… Thanks, Kazu,” you said, leaning over and kissing his cheek, before nuzzling back into his neck, preparing to sleep the rest of the way back.

He blushed at the sudden contact of your lips, letting out a small cough, before shaking his head, forcing himself to focus on the walk ahead of him. He was glad he had finally gotten those feelings off his chest, and even more that you had reciprocated. He couldn’t wait to see your sober self’s reaction to everything in the morning either.

As for the discarded poems, he’d probably just throw those away. But he’d keep that haiku you had finished together for the rest of his days.

end note: my pinky fucking HURTS

also I don’t think this was very good but fuck it we ball

[softiem]

you used to paint his skies (pt. 2)

pairing: Bokuto Koutarou x GN!Reader

overview: The one in which Bokuto is still swearing up and down that he loves you, but the nagging feeling in your chest is too strong to ignore.

word count: ~4.3k

content warnings: mentions of cheating, swearing, MSBY!Bokuto, mildly suggestive scene at the end (no nsfw), our baby Bokuto kind of loses it at the end, don’t let the fluffy interludes deceive you again

notes: I’M SO SORRY FOR LITERALLY BEING DEAD FOR 6 MONTHS,,, Here’s the second part to “you used to paint his skies” :D (I think this is better than part one — at least I hope so). Some people asked to be tagged for this second part, so those will be below. Thank you for reading, darlings ʕ ´•̥̥̥ ᴥ•̥̥̥`ʔ <333

part one.

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“Baby?”

Faint sniffles came from Bokuto, whose head was currently nestled on your lap, the two of you strewn across the sofa. His arms were wrapped tight around your waist, as if he were afraid that holding you any looser would cause you to disappear from his arms. His voice was quiet, meek — nothing like the loud, boisterous ball of energy you’d grown to adore, to cherish.

To fall in love with.

Now, here the both of you were, a pile of cracked and fragmented pieces of the love you once shared, desperately grasping at whatever you could salvage from the mess.

You hummed a response.

“Are we gonna be okay?” Bokuto turned his head, his eyes staring up at you — wide, teary, and filled with a broken sense of hope.

In an attempt to avoid breaking down a third time, you cleared your throat. You still couldn’t look down at him, into his eyes that seemed to praise your very existence, even after the pain you caused.

“Please.” His voice cracked.

“Let’s not talk about that right now, Kou-Bokuto.”

He bit his lip roughly, enough to bite into the skin and draw a slight trace of blood. Choking on a weak sob, he nestled his head into your stomach once more. He couldn’t stop you from calling him that name anymore; he’d lost that privilege.

What could he have been asking for? For you to simply just call him your Koutarou again? For you not to leave him and stay in his arms? For you to kiss him and wipe those tears running from his pretty eyes as you tell him you’ll love him forever, no matter what?

Quite honestly, Bokuto didn’t know what he was asking of you; he didn’t know what he wanted from you.

The only thing running through his mind was the fact that he’d just ruined the best thing to ever happen to him.

You.

You, the love of his life. He knew you like the back of his hand.

He knew how, despite your small tendency to be romantically constipated, you tried your best to love him — even to the point of using stupidly cheesy pet names for each other.

– – – – –

“Please, baby!” Bokuto had your hands tightly grasped in his. “I swear, if you do this for me, I won’t ever ask you for anything else for the rest of my life — okay, that’s a lie because I really want ice cream after this, but you know what I mean!”

“Kou.” You drew in a breath. “I’m saying yes to the ice cream later, but those are the cheesiest pet names I have ever heard of.”

You saw the way Bokuto visibly deflated as he heard your soft rejection of his idea.

For the rest of the night (after stopping by the store and getting yourselves two tubs of ice cream, of course), the two of you sat cuddled up on the sofa half-paying attention to whatever B-list movie was recommended to you. Occasionally, you would hear Bokuto let out a deep sigh, most likely to try and guilt trip you into doing what he asked of you earlier.

Turning your head to face him, you grinned at the little pout on his lips as his eyes bore holes into the TV screen.

“Hey, Kou.”

Nothing. His attention stayed glued to the TV. The only sign that showed he’d heard you was the deepening of his pout.

“Koutaro, pretty boy. I’m talking to you,” you giggled.

Still nothing. You racked your brain for all of the possible ways this could end — every one of them resulted in the same thing.

Sighing, you brought up a finger to poke at his cheek. “Hey, dovey.”

If Bokuto were a dog, his ears would have stood straight up and his tail would have started wagging as he whipped his head around to look at you.

“Say that again,” he demanded, his eyes wide and sparkling and the corner of his lips twitching, just barely restraining a smile.

When you didn’t reply, his fingers prodded at your side — a promise to tickle you if you didn’t humour him right now.

“Say it again! Who am I?”

“You’re my dovey.”

“And who are you?”

You struggled to fight the urge to curl up into yourself as you answered him, “I’m your lovey.”

“And what are we together?” Bokuto brought his face closer to yours, his eyes going back and forth between your eyes and lips.

“We’re lovey dovey.” You completed it with a pair of awkward jazz hands.

With that, Bokuto’s face split into a blinding smile as his laughter rang through the living room. He brought you tight into his arms and buried his face into the crook of your neck.

“Yes! I knew you could do it, lovey!” Your cheeks grew warm as you were subjected to his rain of kisses on your face. 

Pulling him in for one last kiss to your lips, you whispered, “I love you so much, Kou.”

– – – – –

He knew how he was always the first thing on your mind; you’d put him as your first priority without fail, no matter how busy you were, even when he hadn’t put you as his.

– – – – –

Bokuto stared up at the crisp, white ceiling — hospitals were never a fun place to be in. He was broken from his thoughts when the door to his room burst open, revealing you in your ever-ethereal work clothes rushing toward him.

“Babe! Are you alright?” Stopping at the side of his bed, you brought his hand up to place a kiss on his knuckles.

Bokuto let out a light laugh as he intertwined his fingers with yours. “Yeah, it’s just a sprained ankle. Nothing to worry about, honey.”

“What do you mean ‘nothing to worry about’? Your coach said that you’d have to be out for two weeks!”

“That’s not too much! It’s not like I’ll be missing the whole season, angel.”

“But, Kou, you also have to–”

Bokuto stopped your worried rambling as he pulled you down, giving you a soft kiss on your lips and cheeks. He gave you a smile.

“Stop worrying, baby! Everything will be fine because I have the cutest, smartest, and kindest nurse to help me recover, right?”

“And who’s that?” You sent him a teasing look as your hands shuffled through your pockets looking for your phone.

“You, silly!” He paused before staring up at you in concern. “You are going to take care of me, right, baby?”

“I don’t know about that, Kou. Work has been hectic lately.” You pulled out your phone.

“But I’m injured! And I’m your boyfriend too! You can’t just leave your injured boyfriend alone to fend for himself! Baby!” Walking away from his bed, you exited the hospital room, tapping away on your phone.

A few minutes passed before you returned, seeing Bokuto sulking in the hospital bed, a familiar pout on his lips.

Your eyes softened as you gave him a smile. “Guess who just got two weeks off?”

– – – – –

The foundation of your relationship was built upon the fact that the two of you knew each other like no other; you loved each other like no other.

So how had everything culminated into such a mess?

“Bokuto.” You felt the way his body stiffened as you called his name.

“Yes,” he hesitated, “honey?”

“Do you remember what I told you a couple years ago? About what I thought of love?”

Feeling a prickling sensation in his nose, Bokuto squeezed his eyes shut, forcing out a few tears that had collected on his eyelashes.

His voice came out hoarse and weak as he whispered, “I could never forget.”

– – – – –

The sky was enveloped in a cloak of darkness, but not even the onslaught of exhaustion could prevent the two of you from leaning back on the picnic blanket to stare up at the shimmering stars.

“Baby?” Bokuto turned his head to where you lay beside him. You hummed in response, half of your attention taken by the stars.

“What do you think about love?”

You raised an eyebrow, rolling onto your side to fully look at your boyfriend.

The moonlight casted harsh shadows on his face, but the way he looked at you — eyes sparkling with curiosity and the corners of his lips curled into a light smile — softened the darkness surrounding the two of you.

“Where did that question come from?” You raised a hand to lightly trace over the curves and slopes of his face; your thumb caressed his cheek as he leaned into your touch.

“Answer my question first, and then I’ll tell you.” His eyes turned into little crescent moons as he smiled at you. “Deal?”

You pretended to think about it for a few seconds. “Hm, three kisses please,” you said, wiggling three of your fingers.

Bokuto laughed, indulging you with a kiss to both of your cheeks and a final kiss to your lips.

“Okay, okay,” you giggled. “You asked me what I think about love?”

He nodded.

“Well,” you sighed, turning back to face the midnight sky above you, “I think that love is like the sky — the sun, to be specific. It’s always changing, and everything is so unpredictable about it. There’s so much potential for destruction in what the sky holds. But, there’s always one constant. Do you know what it is, Kou?” You looked at him.

“What is it, angel?” His golden eyes glimmered, as if they were holding stars themselves.

Adjusting your position on the picnic blanket (you curled closer into Bokuto, who wrapped an arm around your shoulders), you continued, “It’s the sun. No matter how much it rains or snows or whatever weather catastrophe is happening, the sun is always going to be there. Sure, you can have multiple suns like those Star Wars planets, but…” you trailed off, looking into his eyes. “... I think I’m happy with my one sunshine.”

Bokuto, ever the romantic, pulled you into a nearly-bone-crushing hug as he laughed into your shoulder. After peppering kisses to your neck and jaw, he pulled away to look at you. He sported the brightest smile, but something sparkled behind those eyes of his.

“Baby?”

“Yeah?”

“I think you’re getting cheesier than me.”

You groaned, leaning away from him, “Shut up, Kou!”

He giggled before placing a gentle kiss on your lips.

“Now let’s get home before these mosquitoes eat us alive, honey.”

“And then you’ll tell me where you got that question from?”

“Of course, honey! I never break a deal!”

– – – – –

How could he forget what you said? Every word you’ve ever spoken to him, he’s grasped onto like a lifeline, as if they would be your last. He was so close to bursting — so close to pulling himself off of your lap, looking into your pretty eyes, grasping your shoulders, and yelling at you, screaming at you, asking why you would think he could ever forget anything about you. How dare you think he could ever forget anything about you?

But he couldn’t do that. Not to you. Not anymore.

He didn’t realise that you’d gone silent — his world had gone silent — until your sniffles broke his reverie. His arms tightened around your waist as his head nuzzled into your stomach once again; it was a broken act of comfort.

“Honey,” the edges of his voice cracked as he called out for you. “Talk to me. Please. Don’t… don’t stay quiet.”

Being met with another bout of silence was almost excruciating. Bokuto was struggling to keep himself together, to keep his head above the water before he drowned in his thoughts of losing you.

He launched himself up from your lap, grabbing your face with shaky hands. He had tears running down his face once again. His face was blotchy, and his hair was a mess. He was a mess.

“Please, lovey,” he whispered. If you stayed silent just one minute longer, he’d collapse. He was sure of it. Fighting the urge to just sit himself in your lap, pull you tight against him, and beg you not to leave, Bokuto settled with caressing the skin under your shirt.

Finally, you broke the silence.

“I forgot to tell you one thing that night.” You moved your hand from where it was resting in his hair back to your side; he tensed at the loss of your touch.

He swallowed, his anxiety began to pile up once again. “What’d you forget, baby?”

“Even though the sun” — your voice cracked — “is a constant, sometimes it can be too much. Burn too bright and dry up everything underneath the sky. Sometimes...” you paused to take a deep breath, trying to swallow back the lump that was growing in your throat. “Sometimes the sun can do even worse harm than anything the sky could do.”

Bokuto could feel the gradual increase of his heartbeat. He shook his head, his fingers involuntarily digging into your skin. No, no, you didn’t mean that. You couldn’t mean that. If you did he… he didn’t know what he would do.

“I’m sorry, Bokuto,” you murmured, “I can’t stay here any longer.”

You tried to pry yourself out of his grip, but he wouldn’t relent. His arms were shaking as he pulled you even closer into him. He was whispering something to himself.

“Bokuto, I’m being serious.” You tried to keep your voice stable but failed miserably — it all came out shaky, your tone uneven. “Let me go.”

His whispers grew louder until you could finally understand what he was saying.

“No, no. This isn’t real. I love you. I love you. No, don’t leave. Please don’t leave. I love you.”

You called his name. Once, twice, thrice. As you called for him, his whispers grew to full-blown cries.

“Bokuto!”

“I’M SORRY DON’T LEAVE ME!”

But the only thing your eyes chose to focus on was the trail of red and purple leading down his neck.

You felt a prickling sensation behind your eyes, a feeling that had grown familiar to you in the past few hours.

Bokuto caught the wandering of your eyes down his neck, a faraway mist muddled the irises he loved gazing into; he realised what you were staring at, forcing down a choked sob. He clenched his jaw, violently cursing himself for making you feel like you weren’t enough, like you weren’t the one keeping him standing straight.

Like you weren’t his sun, moon, stars, and whatever else you filled the fucking sky with.

He gently moved your head, trying to get you to look back into his eyes and away from the bruised mistake that marred his skin. His thoughts only filled with one thing — “Come back to me, baby.”

Waves of relief crashed against him once you met his eyes.

“Baby– Angel– I’m so– I don’t– Please–” Bokuto struggled to keep his thoughts straight. Not when you stared at him with an iciness that pierced his heart every time he looked back into your eyes, hoping to find even the smallest trace of love left for him.

He let out a rough sigh, frustrated with his inability to speak through the racing of his heart. His hands, still cupping your face, lightly squeezed your cheeks to ground himself. He looked back to you, his eyes swimming with even more tears, trying to send a message to you that he couldn’t put into words.

You looked away from him, focusing on the ticking clock on the wall as you gnawed your lip. A question had been running through your mind ever since he cracked into your resolve to leave and pulled you to the sofa, laying his head in your lap.

Your eyes turned back to him.

“Can you tell me something, Bokuto?”

“Yes, yes, baby, of course. I’ll do anything you want.” He eagerly nodded, a small spark of hope sparkled within him.

“Why’d you lie?”

He felt as though you just dumped him into one of Atsumu’s god-awful ice baths.

“What’re you saying, angel?” His eyebrows furrowed. “I’ve never lied to you.”

“Earlier,” you croaked. “I asked you earlier how long you’ve been” — you couldn’t say that word; it’d hurt too much — “messing around.”

A glint of recognition passed his eyes.

Continuing, you forced your voice out, even though it grew weaker the more you tried to hide your pain, “You said that it was just this once. That wasn’t the whole truth, was it?”

Fuck. Bokuto took his hands away from your face, opting to grasp one of your hands in his. He gave your knuckles a kiss before looking back at you, his eyes teeming with unadulterated guilt and desperation.

“I-I knew them before this ever happened. We met at one of the team parties, but you weren’t there because you were at work.” He saw a glimpse of darkness shadow over your face, and his heartbeat picked up again (not that it ever really settled). “But we never did anything! Not until last night, at least.” His voice grew quiet at the end.

“And never once did it occur to you to tell them that you were taken?”

Bokuto’s lips started trembling — no doubt he’d begin crying again. He looked down, trying to avoid your glare, but his grip on your hand never loosened.

“Please, baby. I’m so sorry,” he choked out, “I’m so fucking sorry. I fucked up in the worst way possible. But I promise you, I never did anything with them before. We just talked at that one party. I promise you that. I promise, honey.”

The look in your eyes became even colder, even more distant; something akin to hatred was present as well. No, this couldn’t be happening. His worst nightmare was coming true. You’d finally learned the truth and were going to leave him. You might have called him your sunshine that one night two years ago, but, to him, you were his oxygen — without you, he was truly nothing. Just a corpse of a man, not worth wasting a breath on.

He was losing you. Again.

“I’m leaving, Bokuto.” You roughly pulled your hand from his grasp, ignoring his cries for you to please stop, to listen for just a minute longer. “Don’t you dare try to look for me.”

Bokuto whimpered, following you to where you were trying to pick up your bags in your haste of anger. Once again, he tugged at the straps, trying to steal them away from you, but his arms grew weak at the scowl pointed his way.

His breath quickened, and his heart raced. He was panicking, grasping at straws to have to rethink your choice and stay with him so he could apologise for the rest of both of your lives. He’d spend the remainder of eternity begging for your forgiveness if only you’d just stay with him.

But he couldn’t say a word. Not with his blinded panic, and definitely not with the terrible, agonising look you were giving him as you stared back at him.

Was this how you felt when he’d walked out on you last night? Hopeless. Defenseless. As if you weren’t even worth a grain of sand underneath the other’s shoe.

“Lovey, I’m sorry!” Bokuto cried out one more time, hoping that he’d reach out to whatever small piece of love you still held for him. “I said I’m sorry! Please just forgive me, don’t leave me. Please! I’m begging you! Whatever you want me to do, I’ll do it a million times over. Just, please,” he quieted to a whisper, just barely reaching your ears, “stay with me, and we can get through this together.”

His face crumpled as he heard your responding scoff.

“There’s no more ‘together’ for us, Bokuto.”

Your words stung — well, they stung as much as a gunshot or a knife to the heart would sting. He pressed on, desperate to get you to hear him out.

“I’m your sunshine, right? Your dovey. Your babe. Your pretty boy. Your Koutarou. Right?” He gripped onto the hem of his shirt, balling his hands into fists. “No matter what you call me, I’m yours. And I always will be. Even if you leave me right now, I’ll never stop looking for you. You know why?”

You stayed silent.

“Because I am just as much your sun as you are mine.”

His words echoed in your mind — that twisted, gnawing feeling came back in your gut. You knew that if you stayed for one more minute, it’d be over for you, and you’d go running back into his arms that always held you so tightly. Into his arms that smelt like home. Into his arms that made you feel like you were on top of the world as long as he was by your side. Into his arms that held onto another once the two of you reached a rough patch.

You made your decision.

“Koutarou…” His head snapped up to look at you, his eyes wide and glittering with a false sense of hope. “I’m sorry. I have to leave.”

There was another feeling growing within Bokuto. It was ugly, festering in the deepest parts of his mind — coming from a place that refused to acknowledge his faults. This feeling, it blamed

you. Why would you hurt him like this? How could you hurt him like this? You said he was your sunshine, your dovey, your Koutarou! How cruel could you be to lead him on, calling him ‘Koutarou’ again? You said you loved him!

“Don’t leave me!” He raised his voice. This feeling was taking over him, and it was angry. “If you leave, I’ll-I’ll…” His voice trailed off as he tried to regain control of himself.

Your brows furrowed. He still had the energy to yell, huh?

“You’ll what?” You took a step toward him. He looked away from you, trying to avoid your burning gaze. “Tell me, Koutarou. What will you do if I leave?”

He shook his head; you knew what that meant — “I won’t say it.”

“You’ll go back to them, won’t you?” you scoffed. “Have fun, Koutarou.”

Adjusting the straps of your bags, you gave him one last glare before moving toward the door once more.

That feeling came back in Bokuto’s mind, and it was stronger than ever. Pounding against the walls he built up, it roared, telling him to make you regret hurting him, make you think twice about leaving him. Bokuto was panicking, his will to beg you to stay was growing weaker as the feeling inside him became increasingly angry at you for causing him so much pain.

He knew he’d regret the next words he’d say to you, but that realisation came a second too late.

“I’ll never forgive you!”

You froze. Turning back around to face him, your eyes narrowed. “What?”

“If you leave me, I’ll never forgive you!”

His eyes were burning into you, a raging fire behind them.

“You’ll never forgive me?” you spat.

As quickly as the fire grew, it was extinguished as Bokuto’s expression morphed into one of shock.

“Wait, baby, I didn’t mean it! I promi–”

Dropping your bags by the door, you strided toward his figure. Pushing him against the wall, you pulled him in by the collar, melding his lips with yours.

The kiss was rough, angry, desperate — an amalgamation of everything you’ve felt in the past few hours going back and forth with Bokuto.

You pushed yourself into the space between his legs as he finally recovered from his shock and tried to match your tempo, his hands pulling you close into his body. Your teeth clashed together, and you had half the mind to bite his tongue in your mouth, but you held back.

Raking your fingers through his hair, you pulled his head back, ignoring his small, pained whine. The offensive mess of red and purple blotches still covered the expanse of his neck. A scowl grew on your face.

Bokuto yelped as he felt your lips latch onto his neck, sucking your own bruises over the ones already existing from his escapade. You were rough, unrelenting in your nearly-primal way of claiming him.

Trying to ignore your satisfaction from hearing his whimpers of your name, you pulled away, looking at your series of marks covering the ones from his other lover. The two of you were left panting — him trying to meet your eyes and you trying to avoid looking at him at all costs.

Leaning into his ear, you placed a gentle bite on his lobe. He tensed ever-so-slightly.

“You’ll never forgive me if I leave?” you hummed.

His hands that were under your shirt, roaming across your back, froze.

“B-Baby, wait, I didn’t–” He tried to plead with you until your next words completely shattered what was left of his broken, battered heart.

“I think I can live with that.”

You quickly backed away from him, evading his attempts to grab at your waist to stop you from leaving, and picked up your bags by the door. Looking back at him one last time, you nearly broke your facade.

After all he’s done, you still loved your Koutarou — no matter how much you tried to convince yourself otherwise — and seeing him on his knees, sobbing, begging you not to leave for the umpteenth time, your will was wearing thin.

“Goodbye, Koutarou.”

The slam of the front door echoed across the remnants of his shattered heart and all he had the strength to do was cry. Pulling at the strands of his hair, he sobbed, begging into the air, weeping with no one to listen to him.

Without you, his world had no sky; everything was bathed in the shadow of your absence.

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tags: @katelyns-stuff @random-fandom-girl-24

[biaswreckme]

caught in a lie | pjm

Part of the Sons of Midas Collab

Summary: As the heir of the King’s Conglomerate, sweetheart Park Jimin has been spending his time at the hospital run by his father, shadowing his footsteps. And it is where his life entangles with yours with lunch dates, caring touches, and whispered promises. But what happens when he finds himself caught in a web of lies?

Pairing: Chaebol!Jimin/Nurse!Reader

Members: Jimin, Jungkook

Length: 8.5k words

Genre: romance, angst, smut, strangers to lovers

Rating: 18+

Triggers/Warnings: explicit sexual content, oral (f and m giving and receiving), fingering (f receiving), lowkey dom!jimin, dry humping, praise kink, accusations involving drugs/meds, lying, incrimination

A/N: This fic is a two-shot part of the Sons of Midas collab. I wanted to start by thanking mars @joheunsaram so much for inviting me to be a part of this incredible collab with such beautifully talented writers ♥ and also for being my beta-reader, thank you so much bb ♥

part one | part two (June 25th)

You were sitting down having your lunch as usual, headphones on, watching a drama on your phone when you noticed someone settling opposite you. You had seen him a handful of times before around the hospital, but he was in a suit that was tailored to fit him perfectly that you could not imagine it being anything but expensive. He was always walking around, observing things, talking to people, but you did not think he was a doctor or another nurse or even anyone who worked there. Maybe he had a chance of being part of admin, but he looked too nice for that. Your train of thoughts was interrupted by his voice, so you paused what you were watching and took off your headphones.

“Hi.”

“Hi?” You were somewhat uncertain, not knowing what he wanted interrupting your lunch, but you noticed he had a tray on the table in front of him.

“Do you mind if I sit here?” His big smile and the way it made his eyes turn into small crescent moons made it impossible to say no, but you looked around and there were empty places.

“Ok?” You asked, confusion stamped across your face. “Do I know you? Did I… do something?” You couldn’t help but ask, this was not an everyday occurrence.

“No, no, I just… I’ve seen you around, you seemed nice, so I wanted to sit here to keep you company, well, if you want to, of course. Whatever it is you’re watching certainly must be more interesting than a random guy asking to sit at your table.” He started to ramble and opened his eyes in shock. “I’m coming off as a total creep, aren’t I? I’m sorry, I’ll leave you alone.”

You smiled, shaking your head in negation.

“You’re not, I've seen you around too. I’m Y/n Y/l/n”,” you extended your arm, presenting your hand for him to shake.

“Y/n,” he repeated, almost as if letting your name roll around on his tongue. But he stopped, seeming to think about what he was going to say for a moment before continuing. “I’m P… Jimin. Just Jimin.”

“Well, just Jimin, nice to meet you. If you’ve seen me, you might have figured I’m a nurse here. What about you? You don’t dress like one. Or like a doctor.”

“I’m… I’m a business student.” He hesitated, but he wasn’t sure whether you’d noticed.

“Business?” You asked, your tone clearly indicating you were not happy with his response. “Business… profits and losses are all you care about? This is a hospital, we treat people here, people who need and not always have the conditions to pay for it. This shouldn’t be a business,” you started getting up, and he did the same, hands up in the air as if trying to maintain peace.

“Please, I’m sorry, I didn’t mean it like that. Please let me explain myself,” he begged, surprised by your reaction. “I’m a business student, yes, but I’ve been going around, trying to get to know the people who work here, the people who are the backbone of this place. People like you, that truly care about the patients.”

You sat there quietly, still unsure about him, but you were willing to listen. And you were glad you did. The more he talked, the more you could see the passion in his eyes the same eye people had said before they saw in yours when you talked about your job. You were still uncertain as to why he was giving you his attention, but for the first time in a while you felt yourself truly seen by someone.

You hated to admit it to yourself, but you were lonely. Moving to Seoul for the nurse position at the hospital had been an impactful decision in your life; it meant leaving everyone you knew behind and moving to a large city by yourself. By then you had some acquaintances, but no one you could truly call a friend. Your tendency to be more introverted and not open up to people that easily both protected and harmed you, but there he was. Jimin - wanting to talk to you, to have lunch, to get to know you. He got you a small bouquet of daisies once, saying he saw them in the florist on the way to the hospital and upon inquiring about their meaning, he said they reminded him of you. And so he took to calling you Daisy, and you started wearing a daisy pin on your scrubs, causing him to smile whenever you crossed paths at the hospital but could not talk to each other.

And soon it turned into a routine. If you had the night shift, he’d usually come by in the morning to have breakfast with you, taking you to the small coffee shop you adored. If you had the day shift, he’d be your company during lunch time at a hidden table at the corner of the cafeteria, choosing to eat your lunch later than usual to not be in any of the gossipers’ radar, your dramas long forgotten during this hour. You would catch up on them later, but you didn’t have to hide behind your screen anymore, in fact, you wouldn’t even touch your phone in his presence. You got to know more about him, but there was still some aura of mystery around his family, with him saying he didn’t feel comfortable talking about them, and you hoped that maybe one day he would feel comfortable enough to open up. But regardless, your conversations were always enthralling and you were filled with sadness when the hour was up.

That is, until the week routine blended into weekends as well, thanks to you taking the initiative. You had taken to cooking for both you and Jimin whenever you knew he would show up, so this proved to be the perfect opportunity - and excuse - to invite him over.

“This is delicious, Y/n,” Jimin started, almost moaning at the taste, “how can you be this good?”

“I’m good at a lot of things,” you decided to be blunt, “cooking in particular, but I have a wide set of skills.”

Jimin just sat there with his mouth open in shock, then blinked rapidly as if to shake some inappropriate thoughts away, but momentarily speechless.

“How about you come to dinner at mine this Saturday?” you asked, deciding to go for it. You liked Jimin and you were pretty sure he also liked you, if all the time you had been spending together was an indication of that.

He took a moment to answer, still seemingly speechless by your forwardness, so you spoke again.

“I’d like to get to know you more outside this hospital, Jimin. We’re always rushing because my hours are crazy, I just… I just want some quiet time with you. And no beeping or smell of disinfectant and people running with a crash cart interrupting our lunch or coffee.” You expressed your tiredness at the situation, always being interrupted by an urgent call or trying to avoid people.

“Tell me when and where and I will be there. I want to be alone with you,” he said, staring into your eyes, then quickly blinked and continued, “I mean, I want some alone time with you too, away from this, not implying anything else, I’m sorry.”

You chuckled; it was rare to see Jimin get flustered over anything at all, it was surely a change, and you could not wait to see what other sides of him you would get to know once you were away and by yourselves.

You opted for a casual dinner, after all, it was at your small apartment, but Jimin’s definition of casual was definitely not the same as yours. He showed up in sinful pants, tight, showing you his muscular thighs - you had learned he was a dancer, yet the muscles that strained the fabric were still a surprise - a black shirt and a leather jacket, which you had carefully put in the hanger by the door, leaving him to roll up his sleeves. You were wearing a black dress, no shoes, and some nice underwear just in case, as you had told yourself.

You had cooked something light, prepared a simple salad, and poured your favorite white wine to accompany the food. Conversation flowed nicely, and it was a nice change in scenery to be able to talk and laugh with Jimin without having to worry about being too loud or calling too much people’s attention. But as nice and calm as the situation was, the tension between the two of you was palpable in the air throughout the dinner. Whenever your fork touched your lips, he would stare, unconsciously licking his lips and taking his own fork to his mouth, his fingers tightening around the silverware.

You had finished eating for a while, just talking at the table when your eyes locked in an intense stare, and you could feel your breath starting to quicken. Jimin licked his lips slowly, his pink tongue darting out and wetting them, and your eyes could not help but focus on the motion. He bit his luscious bottom lip, seeming to think for a second, before closing the distance between your bodies. The position was a little awkward on the sofa, having to turn your bodies, one of your legs bending to give him space to get closer to you. His soft lips pressed onto yours and you felt his tongue seeking permission to deepen the kiss, his hand going to your neck to hold you closer to him, his fingers itching to entangle in your hair. You let out a soft moan when he deepened the kiss, his hand grabbing your neck so tight you could almost feel his short nails on your skin, and you whispered ‘bedroom’ in between kisses.

You wasted no time in pulling him up and towards the bedroom, mentally thanking yourself for having left the condoms in the drawer in your bedside table. It was a small apartment, so it was only a few steps until Jimin was gently pushing you on the bed, stepping out of his socks and hoisting your body up so he could lie on top of you. You opened your legs slightly so he could fit between them, and he slowly rolled his hips into yours as he kissed your neck. You grabbed his hair, your fingers tugging on his blonde strands while you lifted your leg and put it around his hip, pressing down, needing to feel him. Your dress was hoisted up, only the barrier of your lace panties and his pants (and underwear) between your bodies. You could feel his hardness pressing deliciously against you, and you pulled his hair to kiss his lips again.

His hands freed you from your dress, leaving you in the simple pair of lace lingerie, his eyes seemingly darkening seeing your body for the first time.

“You are beautiful, Y/n, such a pretty flower, I can’t believe I’m this lucky” he said, licking his lips while slowly unbuttoning his shirt.

You sat up, helping him in the process, wanting to feel his skin under your fingertips, pushing the garment away from his body. Your fingers immediately went to the side of his body, ghosting over the letters in his tattoo, then going for the deep v on his front. He stood there kneeling on the bed in front of you with his erection straining against his dark pants, and you pressed your hand against it, not hesitating to undo the button and pull down the zipper, and he helped you push it down alongside his underwear. It was a little awkward to take his pants off from his position and both had to maneuver, softly laughing at the moment, the tension and pressure of the first time easing in the room and leaving both of you more comfortable.

He helped you out of our bra, his mouth immediately latching onto one of your nipples, sucking, teasing, biting gently, leaving you a panting mess on the bed while his hand gave attention to the other nipple, pinching it between his thumb and forefinger. You could not keep your moans in, needing to let out your pleasure under his ministrations. You hoisted your hips, trying to have him press against you again when he changed his focus, but he was having none of that. He looked into your eyes while his fingers hooked on the sides of your panties, slowly pulling them down, a string of your wetness visible in the light sticking to the fabric.

“Fuck, you’re so wet,” he said as if he did not believe it, but continued, “can I taste you?”

You could only nod, spreading your legs further so he could lie between them hoisted by his elbows. You adjusted yourself on the pillows so you could watch him, and his eyes did not stray from yours as he lowered his mouth, his tongue out, that first lick from bottom to top having him moaning and closing his eyes. He circled your clit once with his tongue, wrapping his lips around it to suck on it while holding your legs wide open. He let it go with a pop and looked at you.

“Grab my hair, Daisy,” he ordered, his tone leaving no room for hesitation.

You did as he demanded, your fingers entangling again in his soft hair, pulling him towards you. On a particular flick on your clit that left you breathless you tugged on his strands and he moaned, so you did it again, the vibration against your bundle of nerves increasing the pleasurable sensation that had been building up until you couldn’t stop your hips from moving, chasing the high that you were about to fall from. And just as you were about to reach that delicious edge, he stopped.

“Jimin,” you whined and pulled his hair so he would keep licking you, but he shook his head.

“I wanna feel you come when I’m inside you,” he stated, kissing up your body until he reached your lips and you could taste yourself on his tongue. “Let me…” he started, moving away from you, looking around, but you just reached your hand to the side, pointing to the drawer, understanding what he wanted. His eyes tightened into the tiny crescent moons you adored, his hooded gaze of hunger for you turning you on.

He reached into the furniture and grabbed the bottle of lube and the strip of condoms. He opened the foil packet, rolling the condom on his erection and squeezing the lubricant onto it, lathering himself up. You barely had time to appreciate it for itself; it was average in length, the pink of his bulbous head matching the color of his tongue and swollen-from-kisses lips, and you were certain that you were going to feel the girth tomorrow, already anticipating the heavenly stretch that was about to come.

No words were necessary at the moment. Your bodies joined perfectly as if you were long time lovers, no more awkward touches between the two of you. He moved his hips slowly at first, letting you feel the drag of his thickness on your walls and giving you time to adjust to it, not wanting to hurt you. When you were all but clawing at his back he quickened his hips, rolling them just right to have you clenching the pillows under your head, pleasure overtaking your body. The cadence and way in which he moved his hips showed the dancer in him - you had yet to see him dance, maybe you could convince him to do it naked just for you. You could feel the overwhelming sensation building up again, chasing that high that was approaching quickly yet not fast enough.

And it was as if Jimin knew exactly what you needed, canting his hips up at the same time he pressed on your clit, snapping that coiled band forming inside you. He swallowed your moans with a kiss, moaning into it himself, feeling you tighten around him as he wanted. It did not take long for his hips to falter and you tug on his hair and pull him to an open-mouthed kiss as he came, sweaty lithe yet muscular body shining under the bedroom light with the effort.

“So how was that for dessert?” You asked and he chuckled, his lips pressing against yours, still out of breath.

And so your dates continued, alternating between your place and cozy restaurants, never seeing his place. You had an inkling of why he had been avoiding it, but you decided not to press the issue for the time being, wanting to enjoy him and his company as it came, not wanting to complicate things and push him away if he was not ready for that yet. He was slowly opening up, mentioning his family more, making it clear to you that his last name, still a mystery to you, was linked with affluent and influential people, and you did not want to break the bubble you two were inhabiting. Not yet.

That evening, he had taken you to a small family-owned dumpling restaurant. It was the best one you had ever been to, but what certainly contributed to your high opinion of the place was Jimin. He had been looking so good in the navy blazer and tight black pants, his intense eyes staring into yours throughout the meal that all you were thinking about was rushing home and getting him out of that and under you, above you, whichever way it happened. You learned to read his body and you knew he had been thinking about the same thing, his eyes darknening and his tongue peaking out to softly lick his lips and tease you. Thankfully, the restaurant was not far from your apartment, and once you were inside, he pushed you against the wall, molding his body onto yours, his muscular thigh coming in between your thighs, pressing against your center. You moaned at the feeling and started to slightly move your hips back and forth, letting your weight drop so you could feel his thigh even more. You felt him grabbing your hair and tilting your head to the side so he could kiss your neck, biting it, soothing the sting with his soft tongue. You could barely hear him, his words so low into your ear, his breath hot on your skin.

“You wanna ride me?”

You nodded your head, your mouth opening into a moan. “Yes, please… Jimin...”

“Shh, I’ve got you, Y/n,” he whispered, his lips sucking your earlobe making your legs falter. “Remember your safeword. Use it if you need it.”

He quickly looked around your apartment, pulling you towards your couch and sitting down on it. He tugged on your hands to make you sit on his lap, his legs slightly spread, and the moment you lowered your hips, your center came into contact with his erection. You moaned, pressing down, needing to feel more of him against you. Jimin adjusted himself lower on the sofa and his hands grabbed your hips, forcing them to move back and forth on him, looking into your eyes to gauge your reaction. You closed your eyes, his look paired with the feeling between your legs proving to be too intense for you to sustain his gaze. You could feel him, big and heavy pressed against you deliciously, and you canted your hips up an inch and then he was pressing just right, enhancing your pleasure. Your arms went around his shoulders and you hid your face on his neck, your hips moving slightly faster with the aid of his hands, small whines coming out of your mouth.

“You’re so hot like this, so needy for me,” he tugged on your hair while he said this, “look at me. I wanna see your face, come on, come for me.”

You pressed down harder, your legs trembling when pleasure overtook your body, the tingling spreading from the depths of your belly to the tips of your toes and fingers, and he urged you on, not letting you stop until you the small aftershocks were hitting you and you mumbled that it was too much. He kissed you, his tongue caressing yours as you slowly stepped up from his lap and kneeled between his opened legs, hands reaching to take his pants off. You almost blushed when you saw the wet stains on the front and he smirked. Jimin raised his hips, helping you, his erection finally freed from its confines as you tugged his pants down.

There was a soft stain on the front of his underwear too from where you had humped him, showing how wet you truly were. You mouthed his cock through the fabric, your nose touching the skin above it, inhaling his sweet scent, and it turned you on even more to feel how he’d been preparing for you, how he knew pretty well by this point how much you liked to smell the soft skin starting on his neck, kissing him in trails until his scent inebriated you. You followed the outline of his erection until you reached the bulbous head, snapping down the fabric so you could engulf it with your lips. He moaned and bit his full lips, one of his hands pushing your hair back from your face. You licked the wetness from the small slit, your tongue circling its head while you pulled down the underwear just enough so you could have access to his entire erection and balls. You let some spit dribble out, using your hand to stroke him up and down a couple of times before sucking him into your mouth, slowly moving and fitting more of him.

You felt his breath falter for a second before he inhaled deeply, soft high-pitched moans starting to leave his lips, almost as if he was trying to hide them from you for now but was not able to, the intensity of your touch too much for him to be quiet and not to react. You took deep breaths through your nose as you did it preparing to take his full length inside your mouth, pausing when your nose touched his skin, feeling him at the back of your throat, while you felt his left hand following the trace of your face lightly, caressing your cheek, and moaning very low ‘yes, just like this, please’. You choked once, twice, and then backed up, showing him the tears gathering on your eyes and the string of spit not breaking the connection between you and his member, knowing he liked seeing you getting messy like this - and this evening you had gone light on your makeup, thinking you should have used some more mascara to have it running down your cheeks so he could praise you and look more ruined, but alas, he praised you anyways, those words soft and warm coming from his lips as he pressed your head down again. You wiggled your tongue to lick at his base while going down, his hands tightening on your hair, his balls starting to draw up from the pleasure and you used your hands to give them some attention, caressing them softly as you tasted him.

“If you keep this up I’m not gonna last,” he let out in between moans.

You nodded; it was exactly what you wanted, because as much as he loved seeing you being wrecked, you loved watching him fall apart under your ministrations, knowing you were the one making him lose control and feel this good. You intensified your movements and sucked harder, tightening your mouth around him, getting him deeper into your mouth each time until your lips were pressed directly on his skin, the trimmed hairs tickling you.

“Let me take care of you, Chim,” you said as you let him go with a pop, your voice hoarse. You pressed your mouth on him again, this time more sloppy as you got him closer to the edge, loud slurping sounds coming from you as you focused entirely on his pleasure. You felt his balls tightening under your hands, and you increased the suction, going down fast and choking on him, constricting your throat. His voice was beautiful moaning out your name into the room, thick spurts hitting the back of your throat as you swallow. You let him go, licking him clean, out of breath and throat feeling rough. You could barely catch your breath before he was pulling you up onto his lap again, kissing you deeply and hugging you tight against his chest.

“How about we clean up and I make you some tea?” You heard him speaking, his tone low, not wanting to break too much of the daze. He looked into your eyes, smiling upon seeing you still hazy from giving him pleasure. “I…” he paused, shaking his head as if to let go of a thought and change what he was about to confess, “now let me take care of you.”

You tried to be discreet around the hospital, avoiding prying eyes and gossiping mouths the most you could, but your loving looks and soft passing touches struck the attention of one particular set of eyes.

Unbeknownst to you, Park Jimin, as the heir of his family’s conglomerate and the future chairman of the hospital, was expected to marry well and into another affluent family. More specifically, conversations were being held to reach an agreement for him to marry the beautiful heir of the Choi family, Hyuna. She was his age, went to all the same schools and frequented the same places Park Jimin did. That is, until she could not find him anymore in their usual favorite restaurants and clubs and found out he had been spending almost his entire time at the hospital.

For two people who were supposed to be getting to know each other better to make the engagement official in a few months, she surely missed him. So she took it upon herself to go to the hospital, his future hospital, and find him. It did not take her long to ask around to find he was in the cafeteria - why he would be there completely went over her mind, because he could not be actually eating there, could he?

Not only he could, but he was eating accompanied by someone. It must have been just any nurse, all part of his plan on getting to know the people at the hospital - for what reason she could not fathom, after all, he was going to basically own the place, there were other people who should care for the people. He needed to focus on the business, put his heart into it or else he would get too soft, even softer than he already was for someone who was supposed to inherit the entire conglomerate.

So she let it slide. Until she saw him again with her. And again. And once more that same week, the same month. The pattern became too obvious to her, and it was a sure explanation on why he had been avoiding her texts and invitations for dinners and parties they had an obligation to attend.

So a plan started forming into her mind. She had to get that girl out of the equation, it wasn’t as if she hadn’t done that before - albeit it didn’t work exactly in her favor as she planned when she was much younger and had her eyes on Kim Namjoon. And now Choi Hyuna got what she wanted when she wanted. Nobody, certainly not a no-name little nurse would come in between Jimin and her, not after all the planning and work she did to convince both of their families they would be the perfect match.

You were doing your rounds, visiting the patients on the floor that were under your care, going into one room after the other, checking the monitors and their stats, and comforting the family members that were anxiously waiting for updates. So you entered the room absentmindedly, and abruptly halted, surprised upon seeing who was sitting beside your patient’s son, Jeon Jungkook was his name, if you were not mistaken. Ms. Jeon was one of the most recent patients that fell in your route, and when you saw the familiar blonde man that made your heart flutter every time you even thought of his name you had to pause to collect yourself momentarily.

“Oh, hi,” you stopped, chart in hand, looking at Jimin, a little confused.

“Hello, nurse Y/l/n.” Jimin answered, trying to hide his smile.

“You two know each other?” Jungkook asked, pretending not to know, watching your reactions.

“Yes, uh, we’ve seen each other around the hospital,” you were quick to answer. “he’s been making his rounds as a business student, right?”

“Ah,” Jungkook nods his head. “Right, Jimin is finishing his business grad.”

“I told you, I’ve been getting to know people here. But don’t let us disturb your work. Go ahead.” Jimin gestured with his hands, sitting down to give you space.

You felt shy under his intense gaze, as this was the first time he was watching you work, but you shook your head and focused on the task at hand.

“I think she is mom’s favorite,” Jungkook commented to Jimin, looking carefully at both of you. “Not all the nurses talk to their patients like that.”

“It’s always good to talk to them, explain what you’re doing and what’s going on, even if they can’t respond to it,” you explained, going over the numbers on the monitor. “Alright, Ms. Jeon, everything looks good today. Did your son tell you he has someone with him today?” You lower your body so you can whisper in her ear in a way that they can’t hear, “His companion is quite handsome. I like him a lot. That’s our secret, okay?”

You did not notice, but Jimin was looking at you with such fondness in his eyes that alerted Jungkook, who mouthed a “we need to talk” to him.

“Mr. Jeon,” you said, with a normal tone in your voice, trying not to look at Jimin, telling yourself mentally to be professional. “Your mother seems to be recovering quite well, and from what the doctors have been discussing it seems she might be ready to wake up soon. Good day, excuse me.” You said, leaving the room.

As soon as you stepped out and closed the door, Jungkook looked at Jimin with seriousness stamped across his face.

“What are you doing, hyung?” Jungkook asked.

“What do you mean, Jungkook?” Jimin seemed confused at the question.

“Does she even know who you are? Who you truly are?”

“Not yet.”

“You have to tell her. If you love her you have to tell her the truth. You can’t keep lying.”

“Okay, wait a minute. One, I’m not lying per se. I’m just… omitting some information that could be bad for us. And two, I don’t love her. We’re not there yet. I don’t think so. I… I don’t know.” Jimin sighed, letting his head drop into his hands, running his fingers through his hair nervously.

“I’ve seen the way you look at her, the way you talk about her. You can’t just choose and say that you don't love her, that’s now how it works. You just fall in love.” Jungkook said, his eyes shining. “And that’s why you need to tell her you’re Park Jimin. The Park Jimin. It will only get worse if you wait more.”

“I’m scared, Jungkook,” he confessed, shaking his head with his eyes cast down. “I’m scared she’ll run away after learning the truth.”

“The longer you wait the worse it will be, hyung. Does she even have any idea how much money your family has?”

“Not really… I was thinking about inviting her to your birthday as my plus one, could I?”

“You’re not thinking about telling her the truth at the party, are you? Hyung, no! I mean, you can invite her but please tell her before that. She needs to know at least what to expect.”

“I… I’ll see. I’ll invite her and see what I’m going to say…”

“She seems good. And she seems good for you, too. Don’t fuck this up, Mr. Park.”

“I’ll try not to. I like her, Jungkook. I like her a lot,” Jimin sighed again, confessing, “Help me not fuck this up, please.”

Now, you see, Choi Hyuna did not believe herself to be lying about this particular information. She had been introducing herself as Mr. Park’s soon-to-be daughter-in-law, and whenever she got the question of “Oh, Mr. Park Jimin’s girlfriend?”, she corrected them to fiancee (well, soon enough anyways).

Using this, it was easy to learn what she needed about you. It took her a few weeks to gather all the information so as not to arouse too much suspicion, talking to different people around the hospital, to the point in which she had access to your hand-signed charts. Hyuna was particularly proud of her handwriting and signature forging skills, which only helped solidify the plan in her head.

She just needed some copies to show Jimin at the right moment. Until then, she could wait, getting to know her acquaintance at the hospital a little better so he would help her with exactly what she needed to get Y/n away from her man.

He brought up the subject of Jungkook’s birthday party when you were both lying down, sweaty bodies snuggled close, your head resting on his chest, still trying to catch your breaths after the intense and vigorous activities of the night, your body still high strung sensitive from the three orgasms in a short time and sequence, Jimin always trying to do more than the previous times to completely wreck you.

“It’s nothing fancy, just a get together to celebrate his birthday.”

“Yeah, sure, I’d love to go with you. Where is it going to be?”

“At the yacht,” he says nonchalantly.

“Yacht?” You got up onto your elbows, looking at him with disbelief stamped across your face. “Jimin, that’s not nothing fancy, that is probably one of the definitions of fancy if you look it up in the dictionary.” You shook your head, a chuckle almost in a mocking tone coming from your mouth. “I know we are not in the same financial range, but… what should I expect? I’ve tried not to pressure you to talk about your family or friends, but I need to know what I’m getting into. Because if I’m there, I’m going to meet them, aren’t I?”

He nodded in response, affirmatively.

“So I need to know some. I know the topic is uncomfortable and we don’t need to make it an issue, but I’m not going in blind.”

He sighed, pulling up your covers seeing the goosebumps starting to cover your skin at the sweat drying, and turned his body to face you.

“My family is… comfortable.” He opened his eyes wide in surprise at your laugh.

“Jimin, I am comfortable. It’s a small apartment but I earn enough to rent it, get groceries, and have some fun… Are you scared?” He nodded. “Of what? My reaction?” He nodded again in answer to your question, and you were rendered speechless.

“Yes and no? I’m afraid our bubble will no longer exist. It has been good. There has been no pressure to attend parties and pretend to enjoy conversations with people I despise with you by my side. I like being Jimin, your Jimin, not my family or money’s Jimin.”

“If you’re scared of what I’m going to think, this is not going to change what I think about you. I’ve gotten to know you pretty well, and I lov…” you paused, biting your lip, but decided to continue. “I love who you are, Jimin. You care about me, you care about everyone in that hospital, differently from any other man in a suit that has been around. You are thoughtful, kind, and sensitive. I… I love you, Jimin. Even if I don’t know your last name because it comes attached with pressure and probably an insane amount of money, I still love the person that you’ve shown me.”

For what seemed like an eternity, he just stared at you. In his mind, he was taken back to the conversation with Jungkook, reminding how he said he did not love you, that you were not there yet. But looking at you like this, the soft moonlight sneaking in through the partially open window shutters, what seemed like a glow around your body enhanced by the dimmed reading lamp by the bedside table, your cheeks still flushed with pleasure, your hair in disarray, he realized he would not want to be anywhere nor with anyone else but you. His heart pounded in his chest and it was almost as if he could feel it enlarge upon the realization of what he truly felt for you. He brought you closer to his body, kissing you deeply, leaving you out of breath once more.

“I love you, my Daisy.” He confessed in between small kisses on your cheeks, on your forehead, tip of the nose and eyelids, hugging you tight against him. “I’m scared of losing this, of losing you. But you are right, you need to know. I come from money, a lot of money. And when I say a lot, it’s probably more than what you’re imagining. As in this yacht party is nothing, one yacht is nothing really financially speaking, for both my family and my friends’.”

You nod, understanding some; he was sure, you could probably not imagine, but all you cared about was that this would not change what you had and how you felt for each other. You felt warm in his embrace, both body and heart.

“So… Now that I know, can I finally see your place? I’m pretty sure my neighbors are about to start a petition to evict me for all the noises at night…”

He chuckled, lighthearted and feeling free from some of the things that he had been hiding. There were still some details that he chose to omit, but he did not think they were so relevant at the moment. The way your bodies moved with the laughter started to have an effect on him and that he was not able to hide from you.

“How about we give them a true reason to complain?” He asked, pressing his hips against yours, and your laughter died with a moan.

You could barely wait until your shift was over to get home and relax before getting yourself ready for Jungkook’s party. You had come to know him a bit from the time he spent in his mother’s room at the hospital, especially after you found out he was a friend of Jimin’s. But now you were finally going to meet Jimin’s other friends, the ones he mentioned only by name, get to know more about his life and who he was when he was not with you and at the hospital.

You were nervous, knowing the party was in a yacht, and deep down you were scared that the people around him would judge you and him for being with you. He had told you not to worry, that he would be by your side the entire time, and that he was proud to be dating you. You only had to get to the yacht and meet him, and then everything would be alright with him by your side.

“What are you doing?” Your colleague asked upon seeing you looking at Jimin. She had sat down by your table at the cafeteria and you quickly made eye contact with Jimin, trying to signal to him before he came by your table, as you were still keeping your relationship under wraps at the hospital.

“What? Nothing. Just eating my lunch.” You shifted your gaze to your food, avoiding looking in his direction again.

“Girl, get out of your mind. He’s hot, but he is way out of your league. Don’t even dream about it,” she laughed, as if the idea was absurd. “You do know who he is, don’t you?”

You shook your head, pretending not to know, as if you were just admiring him from afar with a crush.

“That’s Park Jimin. From the Parks, you know, owners of the King’s Conglomerate and owners of this fucking hospital.”

To say shock came across your face would not have been enough. Park Jimin?

“You mean as in Mr. Park, the chairman Mr. Park?” You felt a tremor run through your body, a foreign feeling taking over as you learned the entire truth. So that was what he had been hiding from you.

“Yeah, that is his son. He’s been going around the hospital, shadowing his dad and looking at how everything works. I’m pretty sure he might take over soon, the man is surely getting old.”

“I… I had no idea.” You raised your head to look at him, but he was nowhere to be found.

This would not change things. You understood why he had omitted this information, and you had to admit to yourself that although this had the potential to change your relationship, you would fight to not let it happen. Everything had been working out fine. Everything would work out fine.

Jimin was anxious. The party had started, people mingling, drinking, not so subtle glances as the night started to progress. Daisy was about to arrive and he could not wait until he introduced her to the other guys. He kept looking at his phone and around the entrance, her text saying she was waiting for the transportation to the yacht still open. When he looked around again, he was met with Choi Hyuna, smiling and waving discreetly before approaching him. He sighed, thinking that he had been stalling for too long, he needed to tell her about Daisy and end the arrangement, no matter what his parents thought.

“Hi, Jimin,” she said with a wide smile still on her lips, hand clutching her purse tightly.

He nodded with a polite smile, and averted his gaze to search for Daisy again, and Hyuna could not help but notice the motion.

“Expecting someone?” She asked, a soft voice pretending confusion.

“Ah, yes… you’re probably going to meet her tonight, and you and I will have to discuss some things regarding our parents’ wishes.” He began, looking at Hyuna, but missing the way she tightened her fingers around her bag.

“Is everything okay? Who am I going to meet, Jimin? It’s not that nurse you've been seen around the hospital with, is it?” Her voice expressed her surprise and discontent, not being able to hide everything from him.

It was Jimin’s turn to be shocked; he thought he had been careful enough, avoiding people’s eyes, but he should have figured they were not as discreet as he thought. Well, he was one to strike other people’s attention, being who he was, so of course someone had seen him with Daisy.

“That’s her, her name is Y/n.”

“I didn’t want to be the one to break the news to you and here of all places, but I found some shady stuff about her, and if she really is coming, I think it’s for the best that you know this now, let’s go somewhere quieter.” Her acting was on point, convincing Jimin to go with her to a room. When they got there, she continued. “I was at the hospital earlier today looking for you, I know how much time you’ve been spending there, when I noticed something and talked to this other nurse who works there. He let me know some things have been missing, Jimin, meds.” She paused and opened her purse, taking some folded pieces of paper and handing it to him.

He grabbed them, unfolding, and it took him a moment to understand what he was seeing. They were copies of ID logs, schedules, reports on missing meds on carts. He was confused, your signature on some of the documents were not out of place, but he had to gather his strength not to crumple the papers when Hyuna continued.

“Look at the reports and her schedule. It’s too much of a coincidence that those meds suddenly disappeared just when she had her shift on that floor, is it not? And she even dared sign some of those herself! I’m sorry, but she must not be that smart, huh? That’s a crime, Jimin, and you as the future chairman of the hospital need to do something about it. Her colleague will probably make a formal complaint soon enough, he said he would try to talk to her, maybe she has an addiction no one knows about and can get her help…”

Jimin closed his eyes, his heart shattering into innumerous pieces inside his chest. He started shaking with heavy breaths, as pulling air into his lungs seemed like a herculean task. He let the papers fall onto the floor, not caring about them, clutching his hand to his chest, trying to dig into his skin to cradle his fragile heart.

“She must have known she could get more access and get away with it being with you for who you are.” Hyuna’s voice was muffled in his ears, and he signaled for her to leave him alone, not sure if words came out of his mouth, but he heard the door closing.

He didn’t know how long he was there, at some point he dropped to his knees, hands on the floor and hair in disarray; his entire body shaking as if he was cold, a foreign sensation dominating his body. He could have sworn he felt his phone vibrating in his pocket a handful of times, but he didn’t have the strength to look at it.

He heard his name being called, a familiar voice entering the room and closing the door, and he had to clench his teeth to gather whatever energy he had in him to deal with the situation. To deal with you and your betrayal.

You entered the room and saw him on his knees, closing the door quickly to get to him, worried about his state. Someone had let you know where he was, and you went straight into the room.

“How long have you known who I am?” It was the first thing he asked, not looking at you, when you lowered your body in front of him.

“What? I know you’re Jimin, just Jimin, remember? You told me that, but someone told me at the hospital today and I was going to talk to you about it soon but...”

“Today? How can you lie to me after I told you I loved you?” He shook his head, disbelief in his voice.

“I only knew what you told me, another nurse saw me looking at you at the cafeteria, remember the woman who was with me during lunch?”

“What are you on right now?” He finally looked at you, his eyes squinting with anger.

“What are you talking about? Jimin…” You were confused, as if you were having two different conversations.

“Or maybe you’re not on anything, you just sell it, is that it?” He got up slowly, grabbing your arm and taking you with him in the process, making you get up as well.

“I’m confused…” You tried to talk, but he interrupted you abruptly, letting your arm go as if your skin was burning his.

“When did you decide to use me and my family to get away with your problems?”

“I…”

“You know what, I don’t want to know. You broke my heart and my trust with this, I never should have trusted someone whose money…”

“Whose money what, Jimin? You told me it didn’t matter. I certainly don’t care nor want your or your family money. What did I do? I don’t understand!” You exclaimed, frustrated, confused, tears starting to fall from your eyes, his words piercing you.

He silently grabbed the scattered papers from the floor, thrusting them into your hands with force, and you looked at them. How did he have a copy of your schedule? And those signatures, they looked similar, but you did not remember touching any of those documents before. And the missing meds reports… and it suddenly started to dawn on you, but what he said next still shocked you to your core.

“Don’t you dream about stepping foot into the hospital again. If you dare show up next shift, I’ll have you arrested and sued for so much money your little mind can’t even begin to wrap around it,” he spit out, venom in his words, so different from the kind man you knew. “Now get out of here. I don’t want to ever see you again.”

You stood there without any reaction, the impact of his words freezing your body into place while you tried to fully understand the situation. You had nothing to do with those papers, but when you opened your mouth to attempt an explanation, he interrupted you again.

“Don’t worry, I’ll have someone drop whatever you have in your locker. Tell me, will we find shit there too? Or are you too smart to risk it? And how the fuck did you hide this from me?”

“Jimin, I…” you started, shaking your head, but he didn’t let you continue. He opened the door abruptly, turned his back on you and walked towards a security guard, pointing to you inside the room.

You let your tears fall free as you ran towards the same corner from which you entered the yacht, ready to leave, still confused as to who would do this to you. But it didn’t matter, did it? Jimin chose his side, and it was certainly not yours.

As you were getting ready to exit the boat, you were leaving him behind. You were leaving your hope. You were leaving your job. You were leaving your sweet memories with him on the water. You were leaving all the past months, buried in a pile of lies and you had no idea how far they went, how far someone was going to get you away from Jimin. You were leaving your heart, destroyed, stepped on, bleeding, in that room alongside those papers.

And somewhere on that yacht the love of your life was seeking that someone, also leaving behind memories of you.

“Hyuna,” Jimin started, looking at the woman when he finally found her again. He took a deep breath, resigning himself to accept his family plans for him. “We should announce our engagement soon.”

--

taglist: @veronawrites @oftenderweapons-a-companion

Thanks so much for reading and I hope you enjoyed it ♥

[meliorist-midoriya]

to you, to the world, to my love (you’re all three)

synopsis: midoriya has always had too much love to give in a world that loved to take. you’re just hoping that he has enough left for you in the end.

pairing: midoriya izuku x reader

genre: fluff with a touch of angst

warnings: some insecurity

word count: 2.5k

notes: happy valentine’s day, everyone! this is my contribution for the pocuties server collab, based off the greek types of love, of which i had the honor of receiving izuku and decided upon agape  please help yourself to the box of chocolates they’re offering for valentine’s, there’s a wide selection of chocolates handmade by talented creators, so i’m sure you’ll find something to your taste! tbh i only managed to finish this fic because i was watching chan’s valentine’s vlive and i was in a super soft mood ;3;

extra: agápe - the ancient greek concept of selfless, universal love.

“Making his debut in the pro hero scene, Pro Hero Deku is blazing a trail straight out of UA—”

“—Pro Hero Deku solved an astounding 30 cases in the past month—”

“Deku’s popularity is skyrocketing, rivaling that of—”

“Hero Deku—”

“Deku—”

“Pro Hero Deku has swept the hero rankings to come out on top as Number 1!”

With a resolute ‘click’ of the remote, the reporters’ overlapping voices cut off as the TV screen faded away, your lonely reflection staring back at you from the blank screen. You, curled up on your empty couch, in your empty apartment with the clock striking what should have been dinner. The TV was only there in an attempt to drown out the crushing silence, the white noise—hellbent on filling the space his presence had left—was deafening.

That attempt failed.

Horribly.

If anything, it just made the sense of wrongness permeating the air even worse. 

(That TV recap of his best moments didn’t help as much as you hoped it would.)

Being alone in this apartment felt… off. As if someone had gouged out what should’ve been there, the ghost of a presence settling a chill into your bones that ran far deeper than just plain loneliness. The foreboding grief of what could be, the fear that you’d resigned yourself to the moment you agreed to follow him on this path, the selfishness gnawing at your conscience every time you saw him run out the door to save the next person, to solve the next case. 

Things like an All Might coffee mug sitting primly next to yours on the drying rack, garishly yellow “tufts” staring back at you with a cracked vengeance. (You’d apologized profusely to him that day, promising to buy him another one. He’d just smiled over his cracked cup of coffee, telling you not to worry about it for the hundredth time.)

Things like his haphazard mess of notes and scrawl spread out on the kitchen counter, the pen sitting next to the half finished page. (You’ve long since learned to leave his notes be, they’ll be tidied up once he’s done… if he’s ever truly done.)

The filled queue of movies and pile of DVDs you’d picked out together, giddy over plans to watch the next time he had a free night. (You remember pretending not to notice him trying to slip another hero documentary near the bottom of the pile, distracting you with talks of popcorn and the night that was supposed to be tonight.)

Deku. The man the world adored, clinging to his promise like a lifeline in times of need. 

Midoriya Izuku. The man you loved, who promised you the world.

“It’ll be okay, I’m here.”

His soft promise echoed both in the battlefield and in your darkest hours, a close mirror to a hero of a generation past, yet it was different. It was his own. Comforting, personal, and wholly him. The public, weak and grasping for new support, latched on to the small sliver of hope his hand offered and he just kept giving, giving, giving. It never seemed to stop, and you were scared. 

He was a man with a bleeding heart with all the love to give and more. To the civilians, to the villains, to anyone in need.

Now, you needed his promise more than ever. A reassurance whispered into reunions and the thousandth hospital visit, over fresh scars and searing kisses. A promise that he would come home. You didn’t want to think of all the times he came so, so close to breaking that promise, even before you two had made it, before you two had even promised yourselves to each other in your UA days.

You pulled the blanket a little tighter around you, staring down at your phone with no real intent in mind as you scrolled. The video playing one of his interview clips (bashfully reciting his “catchphrase,” how cute) cut his voice short as you scrolled past to move on to the next, wincing at the next tweet on your timeline. Him, battered and bloody, as he pulled a child from the aftermath of the battle he’d just won. 

You still need to wrap that new mug you got him as a gift. You still had to listen to him bounce his ideas off of you. You still had to move that hero documentary to the top of the pile. You still—

“Hero Deku saves 30 people, no casualties,” A soft murmuring of the headline shattered the silence, and you smiled to yourself, giggling at all the replies joking of how he threw himself into the fray a little more responsibly and singing their praises.

It’ll be okay.

“Ugh, those reporters are at it again.” 

At your best friend’s exasperated groan, you followed their gaze over to see— ah. 

A small swarm of reporters had worked their way into the fans crowding your boyfriend, their press badges reading every tabloid magazine on this side of the city and prying questions falling off their tongue like poison. From what you could hear over their overlapping clamoring, they were trying to dig into his private life.

Again. 

Deku, the darling of the masses, all sweet smiles and sincere words amidst his strength. Deku, the number one hero with the tightest lock on his private life, which came as a surprise to both everyone and no one.

It was a given, considering his position at the peak of hero society.

It was also a complete shock, considering his tendency to ramble into tangents that had his PR team withering.

Which seemed to help in times like these, now that you thought about it, laughing to yourself as you watched the reporters’ expressions darken in defeat the longer he continued to talk around their questions. Quite a long stretch from stiffly standing on the practice stage at UA all those years ago, frozen from nerves. You idly mused to this to yourself, taking a sip of your drink as you dragged your gaze back over to your best friend.

“Did you choose this cafe because it’s right along Izuku’s patrol route?” They stiffened, and you couldn’t help but laugh at their obvious intentions.

“Maybe, or it could’ve been just a coincidence.” The next teasing jab was halfway off your tongue when they cut you off before you could give into the urge, the words dying in your throat. “When was the last time you saw him anyway? I know you two live together but Todoroki told me he practically lives at the agency with how swamped they are. Are you okay?”

You purse your lips, staring down at the ice swirling around in your cup as you idly stirred it round. As if the sloshing liquid could whisper the answer you wish you knew.

“...Yeah.” They cocked a brow, and you took another sip to try and delay your time. “It’s not like either of us can help it. Izuku’s number one, so this was bound to happen.”

(The clamoring from the reporters grew ever louder. Persistent, that bunch.)

Their expectant (doubting) gaze was met with your own steady one, and you smiled. Whether it was out of consolation or resignation was anyone’s guess.

“We’re okay, I promise.”

You should really be getting to sleep. 

Really, you should.

At least, that’s what you’ve been telling yourself for the past several hours, tossing and turning in your bed with nothing but winter-cold sheets and a gnawing loneliness to keep you company. You know you should be sleeping when the clock on the bedside table reads an ungodly hour and there was work to be done in the morning. You know you should be sleeping when the moon disappears from the night sky and leaves you with nothing but the city lights to dimly illuminate the dark room.

You really know you should be sleeping when you hear the front door click open, Izuku shuffling around the apartment to get ready for whatever minimal amount of sleep he’d get before he had to be up and running soon after.

Despite this, sleep still refuses to come, and you don’t bother pretending to be asleep when he slides into bed next to you. Instead, you turn over and curl into his chest, stifling the guilt that bubbles up when he jumps in surprise.

“Something keeping you up?” Oh, he sounds so tired, and part of you wishes you could just make it all go away. The weight of the world rests heavy on his shoulders, and deep down, you wonder if you’re part of that burden. You curl a little closer, as if trying to smother the thoughts that crashed upon you, spilling over the crack in the dam that only widened the more you spoke.

“Jus’ a little lonely, is all.” Your voice is too quiet, brittle, and you pray to every deity that would listen that he would drop it. That he wouldn’t take on yet another burden when he was already carrying Altas’s share of the world.

“Hey, what’s wrong?”

Of course, the gods are hardly ever so merciful—to them you are just another wishful mortal in the realm of the holy and damned—and Izuku’s hand rests on your cheek with a tenderness that makes you want to cry.

“...Why?” 

The confusion that falls over his expression (gaunt, tired, and God, should you even be doing this right now?) is immediate, and he tilts your face up to meet his gaze with yours, like he could find the answer in city lights dancing over your face. His thumb strokes soft patterns over your cheek—as if brushing off the layers you’d built to protect your soul—and you lean into his soft touch with a sigh.

“Why what?”

The words spill from your lips unbidden, your hesitations softened by the comfort of his touch, the sudden drowsiness, and the emotion that near overwhelms you.

“Why do you still try to do everything yourself? When there’s so many people out there, ready to support you?” His breath hitches in shock, but it’s too late to go back now. You reach up to hold the hand cradling your cheek, distantly remembering a time when he was too insecure of his scarred and crooked hands to even hold your hand.

He’s come a long way, indeed.

“I love you, Izuku. I just don’t know if that can hold up against your love for the world.” 

Something in his gaze softens, to your surprise. His smile is even softer.

“What would you do if you’re both?”

“Wh— Izuku—”

He continues, and you listen, raptured by his words spoken into the glow of the blue hour.

“Yes, I know that at the end of the day, peace and safety has to come first, but—” His smile widens into something bashful, a smile that never failed to send butterflies scattering through your heart. “—who says you can’t be right along with them?” 

He bumped his forehead with yours, smiling emerald eyes gazing into your own with such love—dizzying and overpowering and so, so warm. With the steady thrum of your heartbeat matching his, you found yourself falling even deeper once again.

“You know me, I can never compromise when it comes to what’s important to me.”

You laugh, something watery, as he presses a kiss to your forehead, temple, cheek, with a last, smiling kiss on your lips.

“How greedy.” He laughs into your lips, pulling away to hold you closer.

“Just for you.”

There’s so many things you could’ve said, as you watched the rest of the night sky fade into the deep blues of dawn. But, you decide, the comforting silence was best left as is, only broken by one resounding comfort.

It’ll be okay.

“You know, it would’ve been nice to know that you had taken the day off before I had that whole guilt spiral last night.”

“It turned out okay though, didn’t it?” He turned back to flash you that cheeky grin of his, half-hidden by his winter coat and backed by the glow of the setting sun. You just rolled your eyes with a laugh before jogging to catch up to him, slipping you hand out of your pocket to interlace your fingers with his.

“Yeah, it did.” 

The walk was silent as you two strolled down the familiar path, winding down after a whole day spent with each other. It was romantic of him, now that you thought about it, to take the whole Valentine’s Day off just for you. You hummed as you leaned onto him, giddy and content at the thought. 

In love, if you were to be so bold.

(Granted, he had to wear a mask and a cap the entire time to hide from the prying eyes of the public, but you made do.)

The sight of aged, familiar scenery pulled you from your musings, and you tugged at his hand to grab his attention, pointing at the quaint bench surrounded by bare gingko trees.

“Hey, wasn’t this the park where you confessed?” At your words, he froze and glanced over at the familiar scenery, eventually burying his face into his free hand with a groan once the old memories clicked in his head.

“Oh, don’t remind me. It’s still embarrassing to look back on.”

“What? I thought you were cute!” You laughed, nudging him to follow as you led him over to the small park, brushing off the dust to sit on the bench before patting the space next to you. Izuku obliged, and you almost automatically curled into his side, as if by habit.

“Did we really walk all the way here from the station?” His disbelieving tone made you look up at him, his expression one of nostalgic awe, before casting your attention back to the aged scenery, humming in agreement as you idly picked out what’s changed and what’s stayed in the years that have passed.

“I guess we never really forget, huh?”

“I forgot the sunset looked the best from here.”

“I hope you didn’t forget all the memories we made here.” He tore his attention from the sunset to gape down at you, scandalized.

“Of course not!” 

“Really?” He arched a brow at the teasing lilt to your voice and the mischievous grin playing at your lips, “So you didn’t forget accidentally firing an Air Force shot at me when we first met because you were training?”

He buried his face in his hands again with another embarrassed groan.

“I hoped you would forget that, at least!” You just laughed, hugging him closer as if to console him from your teasing. Before long, the atmosphere settled back into a quiet reminiscence, indulging in the nostalgia of memories past in this little park. The silence that was once deafening alone, now softened by the comfort of his presence at your side.

“We’ve made so many memories in this park, huh?” At your soft hum of agreement, he continued. Was his voice shaking? “It wouldn’t hurt to make more, would it?”

“What do you me—”

Your question cut itself short as you saw what he held out to you. 

A little velvet box, sitting open in his hand. You dragged your suddenly watery gaze back up to Izuku, his once bashful smile now wobbly with nerves. 

So familiar in this little park, yet so new.

“Happy Valentine’s Day.”

It was just a small walk down memory lane, the street lights blinking on one by one in the wake of the fiery sunset as you two walked the familiar path together. Yet there was something buzzing anew in the air, humming through your soul as you held out your hand to the sun, admiring the way the gem on your ring finger sparkled in the fading sunset. In the other, you interlaced your fingers with his.

Yeah… 

You caught Izuku’s soft gaze, smiling and in love.

We’ll be okay.

[probably-haven]

Hello!! After seeing what you wrote about xiaoven fics I went to see what things you usually write and omg, your archon Venti headcanons????? I am absolutely in love. So if it isn't annoying, could you talk about xiaoven or Venti or Xiao or whatever ship or character you like? I don't care what you are going to say, I just want to know more about your thoughts ^^

I- is this... bestie, this is essentially a free ramble pass- kerujsgheskdfug. Trust me when I say that in no way is this, and in no way will it ever be annoying in the slightest- i literally- lets just say rambling off thoughts is kind of my specialty, especially when provided a topic to branch off of because otherwise I'm just- really indecisive about it so- iujskdh yeah- 100% definitely down to talk about Venti, Xiao, and/or Xiaoven XD. Also, yes- it may have been awhile since i last posted one(cuz again, indecisive about which direction to take part 5), but the Archon War Era Venti headcanons are still without a doubt my favorite posts I've made. It's just such an interesting topic with such endless potential that so few people actually think about or consider or even realize is there, so i always just get really psyched whenever i see someone interact with them lol.

.... this ended up being a bit of a mess: warning in advance

Anyway! onto the actual content!

- You see the thing about Xiaoven is that there's a lot of different ways that it could end up working out, and just personally my favorite way of portraying Xiaoven in my mind is as an unlabeled relationship because if anyone in genshin would give off that vibe its these two. And a number of other reasons.

- Firstly, I heavily headcanon Venti as being an aroace polyplatonic or perhaps heavily demiromantic. However, regardless of this I just don't think that Venti is really the kind of person to worry about how he should label his feelings, thinking it's silly to try to put them in one box or the other, especially with feelings and emotions being as fluid as they are in general. Plus it fits his whole God of Freedom vibe. I just- dont think he's the biggest fan of labels or social categorization in general.

- And secondly on the hand of Xiao... his defense mechanisms are very much ingrained in his personality. It's probably hard enough for him to not go into fight or flight(the answer is fight) at the slightest affection at first, at the slightest feeling of vulnerability. Even further down the line, with his fierce dedication to Liyue, I cant help but get the vibe that the moment he recognized that he was falling for Venti he would begin avoiding him, not only to avoid distraction from his duty, but to avoid corrupting him or losing him in general like he has with like basically every other person he gets close with(even believing that the cycle had repeated once more when he first heard of Morax's death)... now imagine Venti tryna slap a label on their relationship and tell me Xiao would have a positive reaction.

- The thing with Xiaoven.... honestly, i feel like theres more ways that it can go wrong than it can go right, but if they do manage to make their relationship work out, it's just simply beautiful in all terms of the word.

- Lets talk about killing. - During the Archon War, both were forced to kill a large number of people and gods alike- Venti out of a need to remain alive to protect Mondstadt, it's freedom, and the nameless bard's legacy by extent- and Xiao out of servitude to the god that was once his master

..... actually- break here- ive talked a lot about Venti on this blog but I havent actually spoken about Xiao all that much- so i should probably do that a bit first... do note though that my characterization of Xiao is pretty flexible actually- this is just- the possible characterization of him that i tend to favor as being the most- uh- "realistically complex"

-

Theres a line I saw this one time in a certain story: "He is a trained weapon. That's what he is, was, and always will be. You cannot change that so stop trying." And i just- think its a really interesting concept- that applies pretty well to Xiao now that i actually think about it. - the concept behind it is this: After spending more than a vast majority of his life killing or otherwise in battle, it's become a part of who he is, a normalcy that after centuries and centuries would be near impossible to get rid of or reverse, and even if it was possible, with his karmic debt constantly eating away at him its unlikely he has enough time left for that to happen. - it sounds like a cruel thing to say about him- but in context it's actually pretty layered and i think about it a lot. It's not as much a "he's a killer lol, that his whole personality" its more of a "The centuries of trauma he experienced have conditioned him into a constantly alert and battle ready mindset while also shaping his dehumanizing inferior-in-worth-but-superior-in-capability view of himself that would have likely been necessary to get through those time, and at this point he's been under that conditioning for long enough that it's essentially ingrained itself in his personality."

- the main idea is- it's a part of who he is, that needs to be accepted as who he is because its not something that he can just up and change. It's not all he is of course but his constant battle mode, as though always waiting to be ambushed or to be granted a new target to eradicate.

a couple character story quotes:

-"His past of service under the evil god had rid Xiao of his innocence and gentleness. All that remained within him was the means to kill and the weight of his sins. The only way he could be of service to mortals was in combat." -"Xiao does not feel any hatred. Having lived for over two thousand years, no single karmic debt constitutes anything more than a fleeting memory. No grudge can last a thousand years; nor is any debt so great that it cannot be paid off in this time. Xiao has spent many long years alone. But his battles have never been in vain." -"where did Xiao have to return to? He was merely leaving the battlefield." -"since Xiao wages a constant war against dark forces powerful enough to devour Liyue in its entirety, any bystanders who witness him in the heat of battle are likely to end up as collateral damage." -"The war he fights can never be won, and will never come to an end." -"Because ultimately, the one with whom Xiao wrestles is himself."

i feel like at some point this very nearly did consume his whole personality, almost turning him into nothing more than a being of slaughter under Morax's control, devoid of any "humanity" at all, consumed and corrupted by his karmic debt like his fellow yakshas before him. - until he experienced a moment of clarity- a song in the wind, the peaceful melody of a dihua flute. - and pulled back from the border of something he wouldnt have been able to return from, there a was a shift in his mind- a concept grown unfamiliar enough with time that it took him a great time to identify what it was; a curiosity. Something that there was no place for on the battlefield, something that by all means should have been completely useless to Xiao, and yet he held onto that curiosity, slowly regaining over time, a sense of who he was and who he could choose to be with each song that the wind chose to carry towards him every once in a blue moon.

and eventually that curiousity turned to longing. Longing "for a day to come when he will wear the mask and dance — not to conquer demons, but to the tune of that flute amid a sea of flowers"

...... uh- heh- if you couldn’t tell already i have a tendency to make my characterizations/analyses of characters more serious that i probably should. 

to summarize: Xiao is constantly toeing the line between his ingrained nature and his humanity- almost as though still trying to decide how much of that humanity he deserves to have, how much he is allowed to have, and how much is safe to have.

^looking back after writing this, i think the best way to explain it is that this is the view that i keep in mind/the lense that i tend to most enjoy looking through and refering back to while examining and/or analyzing his character, actions, story, lines, and overall personality.

idk- i kinda got off track but i just think its a really interesting interpretation to think about because it has some really interesting implications ig- it’s not the full extent of how i view him of course, but i kinda got ahead of myself and its long enough as is so ill just elaborate as i go- Lol i actually have in progress playlists for both him and venti and just- vibes- i could ramble about the playlists alone for hours explaining everything... It’s probably a problem- uh- ill keep going now lol.

anyways! stepping off the angst path for a brief break! Brought to you by their lines in the snow: both waiting for it to get thick enough, Venti for the purpose of a snowball fight and Xiao for the purpose of a tasty and nutritious breakfast.

but its actually something of note that Xiao doesnt actually need to eat so anything he does eat is usually out of obligation or enjoyment- so like.... snow.... like i dont blame him, but of all things- an adeptus who refuses to eat basically anything but almond tofu looks at the freezing-cold-floor-water that yeeted itself from above and decided at some point- damn- that seems more edible than basically ever single actually edible thing ever.... im gonna eat it- like- im glad if eating snow makes him happy but- at the same time...

He probably convinces Venti to eat snow too though and Venti wouldnt even resist I mean he’s wind and has probably consumed worse things in his time so- 2 anemo cryptids with glowing tattoos sitting in Dragonspine monching snow in the dead of night is an amusing thought to me.

- kay, now back to more serious-toned thoughts

One of the things about the ship that i really like is the different contradicting parallels between them:

A lot of how i view Xiao’s character is someone formed largely by the things he cant control and who was forced to accept that accepted that and learned to thrive in it as much as he can.  Venti on the other hand is surrounded by things he cant control and is ever adapting to control as much as he can while embracing whatever he cant as being part of the unpredictability of the world, seeing beauty in it. 

both of them have lost people and do what they do to honor their memory: Xiao continues to do what the Yakshas once did And Venti chooses to do what his friend couldn’t

Xiao’s power coming from himself  and Venti’s from others And both seem to appear to use their power for their own gain while truly helping others behind the scenes

both have killed a lot of people during the archon war Xiao views it as another necessary event out of his control and Venti would likely view it as a tragedy he chose to enact himself

and this is where we meet out balance

Xiao- contrary to how i think a lot of people view him as thinking of himself as a monster- seems canonically to have accepted this as part of his duty, as long as those he killed are not mortals. I dont think he enjoys it no- but someone has to do it and he’s just accepted that its a part of his duty Venti on the other hand-

See the beauty of the ship- as someone with an angst-centric mind- is this- these are two of the most traumatized mfers in the game 

Xiao is by far the one who needs the most help and who can serve to benefit most from the ship- but he is nowhere near self aware enough to recognize that there’s anything wrong or unhealthy about his mindset in the slightest-

whereas you have the contrast with Venti who sorted through most of his trauma with the nameless bard alone during the archon war and while the result appears more healthy- is still really not- but he’s not self aware of that either because i mean- who’s going to tell him? nobody even knows. 

however- venti is aware enough to notice flaws in Xiao’s mindset and “Venti” enough to want to help them through it-

Xiao- while not aware enough to recognize the flaws in Venti’s mindset, can recognize where it contrasts with his own, and is blunt enough to point it out- and then it’s out there to be mulled over- 

they’re so similar and yet so different and a feel just conversing between the two of them, being in each others precense, just being exposed to two mindsets that are so very different could do both of them a whole lot of good.

GEEE THAT BIT OF RAMBLING HAD LITTLE TO NO DIRECTION AT ALL- LET ME-- LET ME MAKE THIS START MAKING SENSE- WITH... DYNAMICS OR SOMETHING

I don’t think Xiao needs to sleep really- and i dont think that sleeping would do anything except make him uneasy at first- he’d probably just get nightmares after all he’s been through- but with Venti he would soon learn that it doesn’t have to be that way, lulled into the first peaceful sleep he’s had in... as long as he can remember.

anywho back to not making sense cuz im fickle and i think most questions about ships are best displayed through character interactions so like- a possible exchange thats cliche but cliches exist for a reason

Xiao: Why do you try so hard to help me, it isn’t easy. I know that much Venti, with the most adoring expression: Because you’re worth it, obviously Xiao: But surely there are others more deserving of- Venti: No Xiao, everyone is just as deserving as the next person, you included Xiao: Then why me above others? Venti: ehe, cuz ur my warrior of course [O//////O oh shit, hes right] Xiao: My contract is with Morax alone [gay panic but in broody yaksha]

it’s kinda difficult cuz neither of them really address their feelings.  I mean Venti does but he does it very indirectly and its rare that he ever does it with like- genuine directness- even spilling his backstory was in the form of a song- and told in the third person- so a lot of their interactions would often have some deeper meaning, especially with Venti being the bard he is. 

I come up with a lot of- errant thoughts about Xiaoven- but this is making me realize that a true analysis of their ship is rather difficult because it just encompasses so many dynamics so its hard to settle on just one and not go rambling about who knows what bouncing from one end of the ship to the other-  Because you truly can and thats the beauty of it

within one moment you can be having a heartfelt conversation about the archon war the impact of lost friends and times past, and the next moment Venti is trying to forcefeed Xiao an apple while Xiao screams about disrespecting the adepti and its just- so lovely

so while they have picnics with nothing but apples, dandelion wine, and almond tofu they can sit down and talk about the dreams Xiao once devoured, and the dandelion wine and apple cider that the first Ragnvindir invented from the plants that never could have grown in Old Mond. The foods that tasted of familiarity, or of the grilled ticker fish Pervases always used to eat, foods that tasted of friends and frankly family that had since passed, glaze lilies and cecilias and qingxin flowers scattered in the surroundings and woven into Xiao’s neat braids and Venti’s now messy ones, rebraided by the steady and inexperienced hands of one unused to gentle action. 

and then of course Venti steals Xiao’s tofu once the mood becomes too grim and replaces it with a bottle of wine that Xiao refers to as “vile poison,” a remark that fatally wounds Venti as he collapses on the floor, proclaiming how he can only be healed by a Yaksha’s kiss. Xiao ignores this of course and simply takes back his tofu with a slight smile on his face, but as Venti persists he soundlessly places a kiss on his own palm before intertwining their fingers and pulling him back up from where he was dramatically sprawled on the floor, grumbling about how such action was “unbecoming of an archon.” A sign of affection only Xiao would ever know about. But Venti is literally wind and I hc his senses work differently anyways so he definitely knows- plus Xiao’s face is red as the blood of his enemies and the way he is pointedly not looking at Venti at all really speaks volumes anyways. 

 -Venti playing epic battle music whenever Xiao goes into fights in what looks like a ridiculously extra performance to anyone else but is actually doing wonders to keep Xiao’s karma at bay

-Venti preaches the practice of “kissing wounds better” and Xiao is unfamiliar with this medical treatment but views it as unnecessary regardless because adepti have accelerated healing, doesn’t mean he’s going to stop him though. 

-Messages whispered on the wind

-Venti’s 1000 year sleep- an accident, not a fun time for the yaksha, and not a fun time for Venti once he woke up. Venti is actually more afraid of restful sleep than Xiao is, hence the sleeping in trees thing, but when Xiao is there, he can sleep restfully with faith that Xiao wont let another millennia slip through his fingertips. 

- Xiao tends to make excuses when doing things that aren’t necessary to his duty, like in his birthday voice line “Have this, it’s a butterfly i made from leaves... Okay. Take it. It’s an adepti amulet -- it staves off evil” because at the current point in his progress it helps him to feel like he’s allowed to do these things. Not wanting to put him off from progress, Venti never comments on his excuse but never fails to whisper a quick reminder of how proud he is of how far Xiao had come.

- Xiao’s karma saddens Venti greatly- not only because of how it effects Xiao but also because its a reminder that as much as Venti tries to honor the memory of those he’s killed, there will always be those who resent him for it, and when he took the option of living away from them, he truly can’t blame them. - And when he gets too wrapped up in thoughts, whether around this topic or similar ones or otherwise, eventually, he’ll hear the sound of a flute on the wind. It’s not divine by any means, but as his own wind connects him to the source, he gets the sentiment all the same. “What impact does one individual’s remaining wrath have on the present. You have done much to help the living in the present” the unspoken idea that Xiao has included himself in that statement, because now, with Venti’s help he’s beginning to learn just how to experience living for himself. 

- Venti’s form and Xiao’s mask are off limit topics though because if either mentions it the other will counter with the opposite and the mood will turn immediately bitter at the idea that both know that what they’re doing is destructive but neither are willing to change

- Venti who has different tells for negative feelings than most people because as much as he likes to pretend it is- this form isnt his, and Xiao who is able to identify those

- many fanfics and headcanons have Venti recognizing when Xiao is uncomfortable and getting him out of those situations. I see that and I love it but i raise you: - Venti taking Xiao to Mondstadt, careful that he doesn’t get to the point that he’s uncomfortable. And nothing goes wrong exactly, but Xiao notices the the way Venti’s cape is blowing in the wind, the way he’s holding his weight, barely on his feet so much as floating on the wind, connected with the ground only for the sake of appearance, all the while he looks just as happy go lucky as ever. And without a word, he grabs his hand and teleports them both out of Mondstadt.  - turns out it was just a slight thing that reminded him of the archon war (cuz i will die on the hill of him having more tragic backstory than just Decarabian), and he of course gives a sincere if not flustered thanks to Xiao, because he’s really not used to people noticing. 

- Venti trying to vent sneakily through fictional stories and Xiao is just like “Didn’t that basically happen to you” and Venti is just like “<_< shit”

- Venti once said affectionally that he wished he had met Xiao sooner and Xiao immediately and seriously shot it down by saying “If you had, I would have been forced to kill you” and both of them now stay up at night wondering who would have won that fight, not sure which result would have hurt more. (because honestly I have no idea who would win in that fight and that terrifies me- I like to think it would have been one of those legends that end with “and the fight persists to this day” or something along those lines)

- “How long have you been together?” “Adepti have no need for-” “1000+ years T^T how dare you deny our love” “O///O our...? ...useless”

- its disney- let me explain- i have this- i have this headcanon inspired by watching too many animatics- - so venti has a human form that isnt his- which he would have had to get used to moving in- and he’s a bard- - uh- anyway- as a third degree black belt in mixed martial arts, i can speak as an authority on this(not really an authority since i havent gone since quarantine but lets pretend). We have a thing referred to as the big three(most things do), and those things are martial arts, gymnastics, and dance. The idea is that they reflect really well off of each other and the best in any one category are good in all three. Timing, balance, form, discipline, technique, hand-eye coordination, grace, ease of motion, they all play a part- anyway-

- Venti taking Xiao’s prowess in martial arts and acrobatics and teaching him how to dance, and as someone who’s extremely skilled in the first two, the third comes easy to him, almost naturally. And it’s delicate and beautiful and lovely and it isn’t hurting anyone. And Venti points all these things out and more and despite how much Xiao insists that he feels ridiculous he truly does enjoy it and it goes a long way towards helping him form more healthy views of himself and his worth.  - Verr Goldett walked in on him once and made a joke about performing at the inn. unfortunately Venti was there and agreed on Xiao’s behalf before he could protest and- and it wasn’t as bad as Xiao thought it would be... he still wouldn’t do it again though without reason, but with good enough reasoning he could probably be convinced. 

- anyways point is he likes dancing to Venti’s songs and i just think that’s really cute - just picture the idea that all the animatics you see actually have the potential to be canon- ugh

- venti tries holding something out of Xiao’s reach since he’s taller and Xiao just fucking teleports 

- both need their space but when they dont, all they have to do is speak the other’s name and they’ll be there.

- and because i just had to.... love languages

- lets start with Xiao- i don’t think he’d view acts of service or quailty time as a love language tbh, and he blunt but really bad with words so affirmation is out, leaving gift giving and physical touch. However, he seems to view most material things as meaningless so- - Xiao who’s love language is in his fleeting touches, something he’s only recently grown comfortable with because of Venti, and now is giving back, which he knows he doesn’t have to do, but that he want’s to, though he’ll still continue to make excuses for each one. “you were shivering” “The inn is high up, you could have fallen..... I said what I said, you’d question an adeptus?”

- and as easy as it is to say words of affirmation for Venti- he does that for everyone- i want to say his is actually acts of service - its the acts of service that let him see just how much Xiao has progressed afterall, from teaching him to dance, to playing another song on the flute, to supplying him with the almond tofu he seems to enjoy so much. Every little thing he does helps Xiao to grow and he couldn’t be happier about that. 

-

- of course most of my headcanons for the ship do take place latter into the relationship because- y’know the less serious unhealthy vibes allow for greater range of thought, but i do still love to think about the serious implications so i kinda hopped back and forth. So sorry about how messy it is btw, i kinda- got carried away- it kinda got some kind of structure near the end tho so- maybe it’s okay. anyway- back to... lol something, we’ll see where thought forests lead. 

[funtimebunnyblog]

I'M BACK!!! 🥰😍❤ Did you all miss me? I'm happy to say that I've finally gotten some WiFi where I'm currently living and updates are gonna try to be more steady here in the future but I can't make any promises because I get very busy with my work 😅😇 Please continue to bear with me!

In other words, a while back I wrote the OG version of this little short fic on A03 but I realized that I had never posted it here! 😱 Nevertheless, I decided to write the Part 2 to this and then decided to remaster that first part before posting it here! 🙂🙂🙂 I'm thinking about turning this into a little mini series 🤔🥰

Anyways, I'll stop rambling! Please enjoy! 😚

Pillarroomates (Chapter 1: Roommate wanted)

(This is dedicated to Dagdoth and Sureynot; 2 of the best bad influences I could ever ask for 🥰😍❤)

The steady click-clacking of keys filled the pleasant silence of the little kitchen, Kars typing away on the laptop before him at the table.

It was just a little after noon, a time where he usually put down his work for a brief session to sit back in silence and enjoy a cup of coffee, or maybe a mug of tea depending on his mood, with whatever baked-good had been whipped up recently. Today however, he chose to cut his little break out of schedule completely to get a jump on the deadline of the month that he was currently picking away at.

Hunched over, eyes glued to the screen, one could've swore he was a living statue perched like that so quietly if it weren't for his typing fingers.

The sweet smell hanging in the air came much closer as Wamuu strode over to the table, a soft smile was painted across the mans lips as he placed an oven fresh cookie on a plate down next to the mug of black tea his Master was letting steep at his side.

"Thank you, Wamuu." Kars said quietly, watching the blonde depart in his peripheral vision for only a beat before regaining his sharp focus on the sea of numbers staring back at him.

Kars had his own room with a desk to work in of course but he always found himself enjoying doing work down here this time of day. The heavenly smell of the kitchen when something was being baked and the pleasant background noise of the radio chiming softly, sometimes accompanied by Wamuu humming along, was something sort of relaxing to Kars.

Relaxing around here tended to be something rare too, as there never seemed to be a dull moment in the lives of the Pillarmen these days.

Not in this neighbourhood, no.

The younger man hummed in response, heading back to the stove to finish scraping fresh cookies off the pan to place on a rack to cool. He was sure Santana would make an appearance soon to try one, with the lovely smell filling the air and all.

Santana could never stay asleep (as heavy of a sleeper as he had the tendency to be) holed up in his room when there was something yummy being cooked.

The times where he appeared the quickest was when Kars flicked on the coffee machine first thing in the morning, the red-head manifesting at his side at the very first spew of hot caffeine never failed to nearly give him a heartattack; especially when it was 5 in the morning in a dark kitchen.

Kars' head lifted, cocking an eyebrow as there suddenly came a knock at the front door; three evenly spaced thumps on the wood. The thought of another complaining neighbour was the first thing to cross his mind, making him sigh as he moved to get up from his chair.

"PIZZA'S HERE!!!"

The sounds of heavy footfalls coming at a rapid speed from down the hallway accompanying the cry stopped him in his tracks.

The plum-haired man grimaced, Wamuu glancing over his shoulder with a frown, as none-other-than Esidisi sped by; the one hand clutching the towel around his waist was the only thing keeping it from blowing away completely.

Despite only catching a glimpse of his speedy companion, Kars didn't miss the fact that the other was sopping wet and trailing water.

Esidisi had simply lept out of the shower the second he heard the knock at the door, leaving with only a towel (just barely even) and the foamy suds that were still clinging to his hair and his body.

No doubt about it, he was dripping all over the place.

And all over his clean floor too.

Kars clicked his tongue, more than tempted to sigh again.

"Really, Esidisi?" He called out to the other.

It was hard to tell whether he was more displeased with his state of soapy undress or the fact that the oldest Pillarmen had gone and ordered yet ANOTHER pizza this week with only God-knows-what on it.

Sure, he the others found themselves actually partaking in "Human food" casually these days. Wamuu even went so far as to teach himself how to cook as a hobby to fill time around the house when he wasn't going to the Gym or to work, but Esidisi had become something of a strange enthusiast on the matter.

Some people in this world got a little riled up over something as simple as Pinapple being added as a topping on a pizza but Kars had a feeling those people would have an absolute fit listening to Esidisi's phone order of a multi-fruit pizza (consisting of: oranges, apples, watermelon and strawberries) with cheese, olives and pepperoni.

He was starting to wonder if his longtime companion was simply doing it just to see how far he could push a Pizza place with his barrage of odd orders until they yelled at him or worse, barred him completely from the place.

His question was only met with laughter. "I decided to ask for Mac and Cheese and Jalapeños on it this time!" Esidisi called back, voice echoing off the walls, as he finally reached the front door.

Wamuu's nose crinkled at the very sound of that, choosing wisely to direct his attention to his cookies once more.

Kars decided to follow suit and do the same with his own work.

He supposed it wasn't really his problem, therefore; he shouldn't say anything.

☆☆☆

The advertisment had been a strange one for sure, but really, you had no choice but to at least look into it. It never hurt to try and you were already desperate enough as it was.

Apartments and open housing in the area was becoming a rarity at best these days, this busy time of year didn't help things either, and you had been scouring the internet for every opportunity or opening there was to move in with someone in this portion of the city.

Sadly, you had turned up empty handed quite a few times.

The last one you had looked into had been great; a nice building, nice seeming people, decent budget; but alas, the people who put out the advert took it down just a day later.

They had decided to give the opening to a close friend of theirs who wanted to come across the country and live with them instead.

You had been starting to consider checking the complete other side of the city and trying to squeeze yourself in somewhere there or maybe even just going with the option of moving cities completely! The hassle of finding a place was just becoming too much until... this one happened to pop up.

☆ Roomate requSWIGGITY SWOOMATE, WE NEED A ROOMATE!!11!!!1!

We are Four Men seeking out a Human roomate to live with us in our rented house.

4 bedroom, 1 bath, 1 kitchen; upstairs, downstairs and basement.

Location: Western side of the city, 929 Bizzare av.

Rent and chores are divided equally among us.

Requirements as followed:

• Must be a CLEAN Human.

• Human must not bear the surname of "Joestar" under ANY means necessary.

•Must be actively working and have claims to have the ability to hold their job.

• Must be willing to contribute to the household via chores and yard work when necessary.

• must be CUTE!!!

• Mus

•

• Must like llf6io78fjjl0

•

• Jo9sjw6jnsjej27ebeolu

• Jsjsij wkk d18kkjs lkdjsjsns52jsjjsnend2njsmdv 6272jsndbdhs2672 jd Djjsija bsij eeskdnne9s782728 jd bjejrn rnusjjsj

• the human must not be loud

• It would be most appreciated if the Human was a mannered person, who holds appreciation for similar hobbies we do. -W

•

Ask within to apply! ☆

You couldn't help but wonder if whoever had written this advert had been drunk at the time by looking at the grabbed mess that took up half the page.

Better yet, you could only hope this was a real advertisement and not some sort of stupid prank.

Either way, you were determined to find out today and claim this oppertunity before anyone else got the chance.

Glancing down at the print out you had made of the ad at the Library, you sighed as you kept going down the street. You had been walking all morning and were beginning to wish you had the foresight to pack a snack or a drink for your seemingly endless sojourn for this supposed place.

There was no picture put onto the advertisement, even a proper description of the place would've been nice, and finding a direct address wasn't exactly a piece of cake to you.

Nonetheless, you kept going. Stopping at every house you passed in hopes to spot a matching address; finding nothing but different numbers and barking dogs tethered in yards.

With every different number meeting your eyes, the possibility of this just being a fake ad just kept growing and growing in your mind.

You were even starting to consider just giving up entirely when, at last, there it was. "292" the numbers were bolted to the front porch, the 9 starting to tilt to one side.

It seemed nice enough. The lawn was well kept, the walkway however looked as if it needed to be redone. The building was a sunbleached blue, probably a nice clean periwinkle once upon a time, but now leaning a tad white and staring to flake. The place was definitely in need of a touch up.

This was the place, now if someone was Home to even just talk to you about this ad that would be great.

You gathered up the courage to leave the sidewalk and start up the overgrown walkway, the wood of the porch whined under your feet as you stepped onto it. A couple of chairs, a book carelessly left behind in one, a little cage sat all by its lonesome in the far corner, and a big unmissable stain (probably coffee) caught your eye on the wood.

The word "Pillarmen" was scrawled on the name card over the mail slot of the front door.

A strange surname, you had never heard of it before, but it must've been safe to assume that it belonged to someone here. Presumably one of the men who had made this advertisement in the first place.

With only a moments hesitation, clutching the print-out in hand, you reached out and rapped on the door hard with your knuckles, then stood back and waited.

Silence... You took the opportunity to fix your appearance slightly, suddenly becoming a little self-conscious, smoothing out your shirt before clasping your hands behind your back neatly and putting on your best smile.

First impressions were important, most especially a first impression made at the door after all.

There came the sounds of voices, too muffled for you to hear through the walls, followed closely by the unmistakable thundering of footsteps coming closer and closer from within.

Finally, the door flung open.

You felt your eyes go a little wide, the smile drained from your face as you craned your neck back slightly to meet the gaze of the very tall and very muscular dark-skinned man that now stood before you.

Belatedly, as your eyes followed the droplets of water that were dripping off him, trickling down every inch of his muscular body and pooling at his feet, you realized he was practically naked; clutching only a fluffy white towel around his waist.

The towel didn't look nearly as fluffy and white as his hair, however.

"Uh--" Your tongue swole in your mouth as you both found yourselves staring at one another, seemingly sharing a similar dumbfounded moment.

He blinked owlishly.

"You're not the Pizza delivery." He said matter-of-factly, breaking the tense silence that had fallen between the two of you.

Your head shook violently, broke from your sudden stupor, pulling out the slightly crumpled piece of paper out for him to see.

"Uh-- I--... N-No! I'm not-- I'm uh.... here ab-about the-- the roomate ad...?" You sputtered, the words felt as garbled as alphabet soup falling off your tongue, you felt a nervous sweat beading on your skin under your clothes as it hit you for a second time that wasn't wearing any. "Oh! If uh-- this is a bad time I-- I can come back later!"

His face lit up suddenly, eyes shimmering like sapphires. "Oh!" He cried. "I forgot about that!"

The massive man turned, calling back over his shoulder deeper into the apartment.

"Kars! There's a Human here, they saw our advert!"

You happened to be so gobsmacked, still reeling from the slight shock of the very first of your encounter, you hadn't even noticed he distinctly used the word "Human" there.

"What?!"

You couldn't see past the mans hulking figure but you could very well hear the scraping of a chair in the distance, followed by more thundering footsteps heading towards the door.

You blinked as yet another larger-than-life sized man made his appearance, pushing past the first with a frown. The both of them looked almost comically squashed where they stood taking up the whole doorway.

This man was just as tall and as muscular as the first. His skin was like ivory, framed by dark cloth wrapped from his neck to the top of his head with only a tuft of deep purple hair dangling precariously out over his pointed nose.

More importantly, very much unlike the first, this one was fully clothed.

Clad in a dress shirt that matched his hair, slightly unbuttoned to just give you a peak of the buldging muscles he had underneath and the sleeves rolled up to the elbow, neatly pressed black dress pants and house shoes.

Kars blinked in surprise as he caught sight of you at last, eyes scanning over you. He honestly hadn't expected someone to come to their door about the advertisement they had put out so quickly, they had only put it out less than a day ago.

If anything, by the way it had turned out, he was surprised someone responded to it at all.

"Please, come in." Kars told you, making his best attempt to save this lousy first impression.

His surprised look was short-lived, turning sharp as he directed it onto Esidisi. The other man smiled sheepishly, turning and retreat back to the bathroom to finish his shower without the pizza he had left it for...

☆☆☆

☆Previously...☆

Kars hummed, reading over the advert for a 4th time with pursed lips.

He had listed all the necessary information about them and the living situation and even put down a few requirements to set the bar for any Human who would happen to want to apply.

However, even with the ground rules set, it still just seemed a little too bare to him.

"Hmm," Kars peered over his shoulder towards the living room doorway; he swore he could hear more of the crunching of the flaming hot cheetos Esidisi was enjoying rather than the actual program he was watching. "Is there anything specific you would like to add to this before I post it?"

"Shay they mush be cute!" came the reply though a mouthful of spicy junkfood. Kars could only hope he wasn't getting crumbs all over the couch again, not to mention getting too handsy with the T.V remote eating those things...

"That isn't what qualifies as a 'requirement', Esidisi..." he sighed.

The other swallowed, now blessed with the ability to speak much clearer; the crinkling of the cheeto bag hit Kars' ears next.

"Well excuse me for having standards." He heard his oldest companion grumble, drowned out by the crunch of more food.

Wamuu's head peered out of the kitchen, the pie he was just about to place in the oven cradled in oven-mit hands. He had decided to try his hand at fudge pie this time, having mastered apple so quickly.

"It would be nice if the Human were a Warrior as well," he said, disappearing from Kars' sight again as he went back into the kitchen, carrying the pie to the awaiting oven. "Or perhaps if they were interested in going to the Gym or baking as I do..."

Kars sighed, "Wamuu, I understand you would like someone to train with but this--"

"The Human must not be loud."

The Pillarman practically jumped out of his chair, the tiniest yelp escaping his lips as he swiveled his head to find none other than Santana looming over him. The sheet lines imprinted in the others face indicated he had just arisen from a deep sleep; most likely venturing out of his cave and into the kitchen to see what Wamuu was up to.

Even after thousands of years, he still couldn't get used to the youngest Pillarman sneaking up on him.

It probably didn't even count as "sneaking" anyways as Santana was just so naturally quiet he just happened to go unnoticed until he spoke up.

Kars opened his mouth to make an attempt to speak again, only to be cut off one more time as Esidisi finally made his own appearance; leaning over the purple-haired man to see the advert in the works.

"See, this is all wrong." Esidisi told him, frowning at the screen. "This is too formal! If we're going to get someone at all, we need to grab their attention somehow. Here, I'll fix it!"

The other practically clamored over him, cheeto bag tucked under arm as he reached over to type on the computer, deleting the majority of the title Kars had written out and already replacing it with one of his own creation.

Kars belatedly realized the others' hands were still coated in hot cheeto crumbs, smudging the keys of his pristine computer with imprints of red and orange as he typed away.

"Esidisi, stop this at once!" He commanded, trying to push him at arms length, only to be met with a hand pushing back and smooshing against his face. The smell of spicy cheese flavoring hit his nostrils, only fueling his fire. "This is my work computer! I'm the one writing this advertisement!"

Santana merely stood back, watching the two elder Pillarmen fight over the computer in silence. Esidisi was pushed by Kars into the keyboard a handful of times before their focus was solely on one another and no longer the ad.

"Get your grubby hands off me!" Kars growled as the other straddled him in the chair, his face now smudged like his keyboard. They kept pushing on one another, a clumsy slap war already underway, obscenities and curses getting mangled as they argued back and forth.

"You never let me--"

"I told you that--"

"I wanna do it! Just let me--"

Santana peered down at the computer curiously, uninterested in watching the display before him any longer.

The red-head typed out his own request before picking up the device and carrying it to the kitchen for Wamuu to see and whatever he wished; Santana ignored the sound of two bodies toppeling out of the chair and hitting the floor as he left.

Kars didn't even get to see the ad (or rather; the remainder of what qualified as an advert) before it was posted online by Santana.