#i hate what it is in universe and i hate what the show is trying to make it represent
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ONCE MORE TO SEE YOU — toji fushiguro x female reader [oneshot]
summary: you’re a single mom with a schedule that leaves little room for anything but work and longing. twice a week, you get to hold your daughter close, pouring all your love into moments that always feel too short. across the hallway, there’s toji — a single dad who watches from a distance, arms crossed, jaw tight, as he wonders how you juggle work and parenting and still manage to make your kid so happy. at first, he’s envious. envious of your composure, your warmth, the way your daughter looks at you like you’re her whole world. but slowly, that envy shifts. what happens when two broken hearts start to lean on each other, finding strength in the spaces they thought would stay empty? can you let someone in without fear of breaking again? can he?
content warnings: fluff, slight angst with comfort. strangers to friends to lovers. slow burn. single parent/divorced (female) reader. single parent toji. reader has a girl [aged 8-9] no name specified, megumi is the same age as well. reader has a toxic/manipulative ex husband. happy ending. lot of feels. very personally penned </3 mentions of other characters: nanami, yuuji, nobara, gojo & sukuna
read on ao3!
toji didn’t usually care much about other people’s business, but you? you were impossible to ignore.
it wasn’t just because your door slammed too loud when your kid came running out, or because you always seemed to be lugging some heavy-ass groceries up the stairs with that determined scowl of yours. it was how you did it all like some damn perfectionist.
toji hated it.
hated the way it made him feel like he should be trying harder too, especially when his kid, megumi, was busy leaving trails of destruction like a little tornado.
“megumi, stop throwing the damn ball against the wall!” he bellowed one evening, slumping further into his couch. the kid ignored him, of course.
then, as if the universe hated him, your door creaked open, and there you were, strolling into the hallway like you had nothing better to do. arms crossed, brows raised, you peered down at him with that no-nonsense air of yours.
“maybe he’s bored?” you suggested, leaning casually against your doorframe.
toji snorted. “maybe he’s just an asshole.”
your face scrunched in disapproval, the kind he’d seen a million times from the PTA moms who used to glare at him when he showed up late to pick up megumi. but you didn’t launch into a lecture like he expected. instead, you glanced at megumi, who had paused mid-throw to stare at you, and crouched down to his level.
“hey, buddy,” you said, voice softening in a way that made toji’s stomach twist. “why don’t you try aiming for that spot over there?” you pointed to a section of the wall that wouldn’t drive everyone insane. megumi actually listened, and toji couldn’t decide if he was impressed or pissed off.
“what, you think you’re some kind of kid whisperer?” he muttered, shoving his hands into his hoodie pocket.
you stood, brushing off your knees, and looked him dead in the eye. “no, but i know how to talk to them.”
toji scowled. “yeah, must be nice, being born with that magic ‘mom gene.’”
you blinked, then burst out laughing, and for some reason, that annoyed him even more.
“mom gene? toji, i only have my kid on weekends. the rest of the time, it’s just me and a bottle of wine trying not to lose my mind.”
he frowned, caught off guard. “wait, what?”
“yeah, divorce does that to you.” your voice was breezy, but your eyes flickered with something darker for a split second. “not that it’s any of your business.”
toji chewed on that revelation, something prickling at the edges of his brain. you weren’t some perfect supermom after all. you were just...getting by, same as him.
the realization didn’t sit well — it made you seem less annoying and more...real. vulnerable, even.
“huh,” he grunted, looking away, suddenly too aware of how quiet the hallway had gotten. megumi was still tossing the ball, but it was softer now, more controlled. “guess you’re not as put together as you seem.”
“and you’re not as big of a jerk as you seem,” you shot back, giving him a pointed look before retreating to your apartment.
toji stared after you, jaw tight, until the door clicked shut. something about you made him itch, made him feel like he needed to either punch a wall or figure out why he couldn’t stop thinking about how you smiled at his kid.
damn it.
toji sat at the edge of his couch, one hand wrapped around a cold beer and the other flipping through a stack of bills. the TV was on, low volume, playing some mindless sports recap he wasn’t even watching. megumi was somewhere in his room, the faint clatter of toys filtering down the hall. the kid had been sulking since this morning, muttering about how “nobody does anything fun.”
he grunted, rubbing a hand down his face. it wasn’t like he didn’t want to take the kid out, but hell, it was hard enough keeping the lights on. trips to the park felt like a luxury he couldn’t afford — time or energy.
and then he heard it. your laugh, loud and unapologetic, echoing in the hallway like it owned the place. toji tilted his head back against the couch, scowling at the ceiling as if that would make the sound go away. it didn’t. instead, it was followed by the high-pitched giggle of your kid, shrieking with joy as the two of you stomped down the stairs.
“hold on, mama needs her shoes!” your voice floated up through the doorframe, playful but firm.
“hurry! we’re gonna miss the swings!” your daughter yelled back, her excitement enough to make toji wince. he could practically see the image of you two — hand in hand, all smiles, making your way to the park like you didn’t have a care in the world.
his jaw tightened. perfect. just another reminder of how much he sucked at this parenting thing.
he took a long swig of his beer and stared at the stack of bills like it was their fault he couldn’t be the kind of dad who made his kid laugh like that. no matter how much he wanted to, he couldn’t just...be you. he didn’t know how to make life look that easy.
“megumi,” he called, his voice rougher than he meant it to be.
there was a pause, the kind that made him think the kid wasn’t going to answer, before a small, reluctant “yeah?” drifted back.
toji sighed, setting the beer down. “you wanna...go outside or somethin’?”
another pause. then: “what for?”
the response hit harder than he cared to admit. what for? shouldn’t his kid want to? shouldn’t he be the one excited to spend time with his old man? but megumi sounded skeptical, like he’d already decided it wouldn’t be fun.
“never mind,” toji muttered, scrubbing a hand through his hair. “forget it.”
the sound of the door to megumi’s room clicking shut made toji’s shoulders sag further.
outside, your laughter faded, replaced by the echo of your footsteps retreating into the distance. he leaned back on the couch, staring at the flickering TV screen, feeling something in his chest tighten and pull.
toji didn’t know when exactly it had started bothering him — this stupid, begrudging little alliance the two of you had. you’d come over when megumi refused his medicine, talking to the kid with that low, steady voice of yours until he opened his mouth like it was no big deal. and toji would come over when your sink started leaking, muttering under his breath the whole time about how you should’ve called a damn plumber.
but this? this was different. it wasn’t about fixing a sink or calming a tantrum. it was about the fact that you always seemed to do better — better at this whole parenting thing, better at making life fun, better at...everything.
and he hated that. hated how it made him feel like he was doing it all wrong.
maybe tomorrow would be different. maybe tomorrow he’d try harder. but for tonight, toji sat in the dim light of his living room, beer in hand, listening to the muffled sounds of megumi’s toys clattering in the other room, and let himself wonder — just for a second — what it’d be like to get it right.
your neighbors thought you had it all figured out — the strict yet cool mom who always had her shit together. you weren’t the one scrambling for groceries or apologizing to the pharmacist because you forgot to refill a prescription. no, your pantry was always stocked, the fridge had every snack your daughter loved, and there was always a pack of pads tucked in the bathroom cabinet, just in case. because if there was one thing you were going to do, it was prepare. even if it was only for two days a week.
but those two days weren’t enough. not for you, anyway.
your daughter was happy, blissfully unaware of how unnatural this arrangement felt to you. she was too young to see what you saw, to feel the cracks in your chest every time sunday evening rolled around and your ex-husband came to pick her up. you watched her climb into the car without a second thought, giggling about whatever they had planned for the week ahead, and you stood on the curb with a smile that felt like it might crack your face in half.
because this wasn’t the norm. at least, it shouldn’t have been.
but she didn’t know that, and how could you tell her? how could you explain that the only reason the divorce had been so clean and quick was because you’d made sure it was? no yelling, no lawyers, no drawn-out battles over custody. you wanted it over before she could develop memories sharp enough to stick.
and it worked — she was happy. unbothered. as if this was just how life was supposed to be.
you hated it.
you hated it almost as much as you hated sitting alone in your too-quiet apartment for the other five days of the week, waiting. hoping. praying for something, anything, that would keep her with you longer.
sometimes, you’d stare at your phone, willing it to light up with a text from your ex. something like hey, last-minute work trip, can you take her this week? or she’s asking to stay with you, is that okay?
but those texts never came. and your little girl never asked. she loved you, you knew that, but she didn’t need you in the way you wished she did. not yet.
not like you needed her.
so, you waited. and in the waiting, you heard everything else.
the muffled shouts of toji and his kid through the walls. the occasional crash of what was probably a wrestling match in their living room. the bark of laughter when megumi said something funny. the kind of noise that used to fill your own apartment, before the silence settled in like an unwelcome guest.
you missed that noise. you missed the mess of it, the chaos, the constant reminder that there was life happening right in front of you.
some nights, you’d hear megumi’s voice drift into the hallway, arguing with his dad about bedtime, and you’d feel a pang in your chest so sharp it made you suck in a breath. you didn’t even know what you were hoping for anymore — a reason to knock on toji’s door? an excuse to borrow sugar or offer some unsolicited parenting advice? maybe it was just the idea of not being alone that called to you, the longing for that noise to become a permanent fixture in your home.
but the door stayed closed, and you stayed on your side, waiting.
thanksgiving wasn’t something you cared much for anymore. your daughter was off with your ex, being doted on by her grandparents, and you were left standing in the middle of your apartment wondering what the hell you were supposed to do with yourself. the thought of spending the day bouncing from bar to bar, pretending like you didn’t care that you were alone, felt more pathetic than liberating.
you had just grabbed your coat, keys jangling in hand, when the knock came. not a gentle knock, either — a heavy, impatient pounding. opening the door, you found megumi standing there, arms crossed and wearing a scowl that was all too familiar.
“you need to come help my dad,” he said bluntly.
you blinked. “uh, what?”
“the turkey,” he clarified, rolling his eyes like you should’ve already known. “he’s gonna burn it. again.”
you almost said no. you really did. it wasn’t your problem if toji fushiguro couldn’t figure out how to roast a turkey. but then megumi fixed you with a look — stubborn, determined, his little fists clenching at his sides — and you saw your daughter in him. that same unyielding resolve she’d inherited from you.
before you could stop yourself, you sighed and grabbed your shoes.
“fine,” you muttered. “but only because i don’t wanna smell burnt turkey through the walls for the next week.”
megumi led the way, not bothering to wait for you to catch up, and by the time you stepped into toji’s apartment, the chaos was already underway. toji was in the kitchen, glaring at the bird like it had personally insulted him, sleeves rolled up and hair a mess. megumi darted off to the living room, immediately digging through his toys, leaving you standing awkwardly in the doorway.
“you planning to just stand there, or are you gonna help?” toji barked without looking up.
“oh, i’m sorry,” you shot back, shrugging off your coat and stepping into the kitchen. “i didn’t realize i was signing up to save thanksgiving.”
“yeah, yeah, just don’t touch the knives,” he grumbled, handing you a bowl of stuffing. “last thing i need is you slicing a finger off.”
“cute,” you deadpanned, elbowing him out of the way to check the turkey. “you’re supposed to baste it, you know. not drown it in oil.”
toji huffed but stepped aside, muttering something under his breath about know-it-alls. for the next hour, the two of you worked in tandem — him grumbling every time you corrected him, you rolling your eyes every time he ignored your advice only to realize you were right. it was messy and loud, and megumi kept wandering into the kitchen to ask if he could “decorate the turkey” with his action figures.
“no,” you and toji said in unison, making megumi pout and stomp back to his toys.
you hated to admit it, but it felt...nice. domestic, even. like the kind of thanksgiving you used to dream about before everything fell apart.
when the turkey was finally done, golden and steaming, toji leaned against the counter, wiping his hands on a towel. “well, guess that’s not a total disaster,” he said, nodding toward the bird.
“you’re welcome,” you replied, smirking.
toji glanced at you, something unreadable flickering in his eyes. then, in a tone that was almost shy — almost — he added, “you, uh...you should stay. for dinner, i mean. since you helped.”
you hesitated, the instinct to say no already on your tongue. but then megumi poked his head around the corner, grinning as he asked if it was time to eat yet, and something in your chest softened.
“yeah,” you said, surprising even yourself. “yeah, i guess i could stay.”
for once, you didn’t worry about whether it was selfish to want this — to sit at a table with someone else’s kid, someone else’s dad, and pretend, just for a little while, that it was your own family.
you barely had time to put your keys down when your daughter bolted out the door, still wearing her ballet costume — tutu, tights, and all.
“where are you going?” you called after her, already regretting the question as you hurried to follow.
by the time you reached the hallway, she was standing in front of megumi, who looked as though he had just rolled out of bed. his hair stuck up in every direction, and he was clutching a carton of milk he’d clearly just retrieved from the grocery bag hanging outside his door. the poor kid froze like a deer caught in headlights as your daughter crossed her arms and declared, “you’re the same height as me. you have to practice with me.”
megumi blinked at her, then at you, then back at her. “what?”
“pirouettes,” she said matter-of-factly, pointing to her little satin shoes. “you just have to stand there and twirl, like this.” she spun in place, her tutu flaring out as she executed a clumsy turn.
“uh...” megumi glanced at the milk in his hand, clearly weighing his options. then, with a defeated grumble that sounded eerily like his dad, he said, “fine. but only for five minutes.”
you were about to step in, to scold her for bothering someone she didn’t know, but then megumi set the milk down and mimicked her spin, his movements stiff and awkward but surprisingly cooperative. the sight of the two of them twirling in the hallway — her with all the determination of a drill sergeant, him with the resigned patience of a kid who had long since accepted the absurdity of his life — made you pause.
“no, no, your arm’s supposed to go here,” she corrected, pulling his hand up into what you assumed was a ballet pose. megumi didn’t protest, just followed her instructions with a tiny scowl on his face.
you leaned against the doorframe, half-amused, half-stunned. the hallway was hardly the place for this — the flickering overhead light and slightly dingy carpet hardly screamed “dance studio” — but neither of them seemed to care. they were kids, after all. they didn’t need permission or a proper setting to make something fun out of nothing.
toji’s door creaked open, and he stepped out, rubbing the back of his neck. his eyes landed on the two kids, and his brows shot up. “what the hell’s goin’ on here?”
you smirked. “your kid’s being recruited as a dance partner.”
toji snorted, crossing his arms as he leaned against the doorframe. “looks like he’s takin’ it seriously.”
“he’s a good sport,” you admitted, watching as your daughter adjusted megumi’s stance like a tiny ballet instructor.
“yeah, well, don’t let him hear you say that. he’s already got enough of an attitude,” toji muttered, though there was a trace of pride in his voice.
you laughed softly, watching as the two kids twirled down the hallway like it was the most natural thing in the world. for a moment, you felt that familiar pang in your chest — the one that came from watching your daughter interact with someone so freely, so innocently. it reminded you of something you’d almost forgotten: kids didn’t care about the social rules adults imposed on them. they didn’t worry about boundaries or appearances. they just...were.
and maybe, just maybe, you could learn something from that.
you had rules. hard, fast rules you swore by, especially when it came to relationships. your daughter was your priority, and anything — or anyone — that complicated the fragile arrangement of custody and weekend visits was a hard no.
you’d learned that the hard way.
it was supposed to be just another date. nothing serious, nothing special. just someone you’d met through a friend of a friend, someone who seemed decent enough at first glance.
but “decent enough” didn’t cut it when he started poking around your home like it was his, asking invasive questions about your parenting and making himself far too comfortable in the space you shared with your daughter.
the final straw came when your girl, barely out of her toddler years, tugged on your sleeve and whispered, “i don’t like him.”
you snapped. you didn’t care about niceties or keeping things civil. your voice was sharp and unrelenting as you told him to leave, not sparing a second thought for his protests or excuses. when he didn’t take the hint, standing there like he had every right to argue with you in your own home, the commotion must have reached the hallway because toji showed up.
he leaned against the doorframe, arms crossed, his eyes hard and unwavering. “you heard her,” he said, his voice calm but carrying an edge that could slice through steel. “get the hell out.”
the man hesitated, glancing between you and toji, before finally storming out with a string of muttered curses. the door slammed behind him, and you exhaled, your shoulders sagging under the weight of your anger.
toji didn’t say anything, just gave you a curt nod before disappearing back into his apartment. but his presence lingered, a silent reminder that someone else got it. someone else understood that when it came to your kids, there were no compromises. if they didn’t like someone, that was the end of it. no debate, no second chances.
because the truth was, kids had a steadfast sense of people. they could see what adults often ignored or rationalized away. and if your little girl didn’t like someone, then that was reason enough to show them the door.
it wasn’t about being strict or overprotective. it was about being selfless in the way only a parent could be — putting your child’s comfort and safety above your own needs, no matter how lonely or frustrating it could be.
and as much as you hated that night, as much as it left you raw and questioning your own choices, it also reaffirmed something you already knew: your girl came first. always.
toji didn’t see the point of relationships. not when all he needed was a night of sex and no strings attached. a quick call, a casual meet-up, and back to their place or the backseat of his car — it was simple, clean, and didn’t involve his son.
rules were rules. no bringing anyone home, ever. it wasn’t just about protecting megumi’s innocence; it was about maintaining some semblance of order in the chaos of their lives.
megumi wasn’t clueless, though. he’d catch on when his dad had a “special lady friend,” his young mind putting two and two together. but he never lingered on it — he was too preoccupied with his toys or his own little world to ask questions. still, toji made it a point to keep those two parts of his life separate. or at least, he tried to.
then there was that night. the one he wished he could erase entirely.
it started with a hookup — someone he barely knew, someone who got a flat tire on the way to meet him. she called him in a panic, and toji, feeling half-responsible, told her to wait downstairs while he scrounged up some cash to help her out. it was supposed to be quick, a simple transaction before he sent her on her way.
but when he opened his apartment door to check on megumi, there she was, standing in the hallway, looking between him and his son like she’d just uncovered some dirty secret.
“seriously?” she snapped, her voice rising. “you have a kid, and you didn’t tell me? what kinda man are you?”
toji froze, his jaw tightening. “it’s not like that,” he started, already regretting everything about this situation. “he’s my son, yeah, but —”
“oh my god,” she interrupted, her voice dripping with something he couldn’t quite place.
“you’re a single dad? that’s so...hot. like, wow, you’re doing all this on your own? it’s inspiring.”
toji stared at her, horrified. was this some kind of joke? how the hell did she jump from being pissed to romanticizing his life? did she think being a single parent was some kind of aesthetic?
before he could say anything, you appeared from your apartment, drawn out by the commotion. one look at the scene and you put the pieces together — the woman’s flirtatious tone, toji’s visible irritation, megumi standing awkwardly behind his dad.
“are you serious right now?” you said, your voice cutting through the tension like a blade. “do you even hear yourself? you don’t just barge into someone’s home and start fantasizing about their struggles like it’s some rom-com plot.”
the woman blinked, clearly taken aback, but you didn’t stop. “being a single parent isn’t some cute little quirk, okay? it’s hard work. it’s messy and exhausting, and you don’t get to stand there and act like it’s sexy or whatever weird thing you’re doing right now. you’re embarrassing yourself.”
toji folded his arms, leaning against the doorframe as he watched you with something close to amusement. “yeah,” he added, a smirk tugging at the corner of his mouth. “what she said.”
the woman huffed, muttered something about how she “didn’t mean it like that,” and stormed off, leaving behind a cloud of awkward silence.
you turned to toji, your arms crossed. “seriously, fushiguro? what the hell was that?”
“don’t look at me,” he grunted. “i told her to wait downstairs. didn’t think she’d take it as an invitation to meet my kid.”
“well, maybe next time, screen your hookups better,” you shot back before glancing at megumi. “you okay, honey?”
megumi shrugged, holding his pillow like it was a shield. “she was weird.”
toji sighed, running a hand through his hair. “tell me about it.”
as you headed back to your apartment, you muttered loud enough for him to hear, “unbelievable.”
toji couldn’t argue with that.
pta meetings were never on your radar — your ex had made sure of that. "you don’t need to stress about these things," he’d said, his tone dismissive, as if your role as a parent didn’t extend to showing up for your own kid. but the moment he insisted one too many times, you knew it was less about easing your workload and more about him basking in the spotlight of being the ever-dedicated single dad.
you weren’t having it anymore.
so, there you were, shuffling awkwardly through the school halls, feeling like a stranger in your own child’s life. asking for directions to the third-grade pta made you feel ridiculous, but not nearly as much as the sight that greeted you when you finally found the room.
your daughter sat next to her father, the picture of poise and politeness. her hands folded neatly in her lap, her back straight, nodding along as if she’d been practicing for a commercial. for a moment, you wondered if you’d walked into the wrong classroom.
but then her eyes flicked to the door, and the facade crumbled. she leaped out of her chair, her tiny legs carrying her toward you as she yelled, “mama!” loud enough to turn heads. the force of her hug nearly knocked the wind out of you, but you didn’t care. this — her joy, her excitement — was worth every awkward second of wandering the school halls.
your ex, however, looked less than thrilled. his jaw tightened, his smile turned brittle, and you swore his ears went red.
“you’re not supposed to be here,” he hissed, his voice low but venomous. “we agreed —”
“you decided,” you cut him off, your voice calm but firm. “i have just as much right to be here as you do.”
your daughter, oblivious to the tension, looked up at both of you with wide, curious eyes. “but daddy said you don’t like school stuff,” she said, her little brow furrowed. “is that true?”
you knelt down, brushing a stray hair from her face. “of course not, sweetheart. i love being here for you. don’t ever think otherwise, okay?”
her face lit up again, but the moment was short-lived. your ex scoffed, muttering something under his breath about boundaries and making a scene. you felt the familiar heat of embarrassment creeping up your neck, the weight of the other parents’ stares pressing down on you.
and then, as if on cue, toji strolled in with megumi trailing behind him, looking as uninterested as ever.
toji’s eyes scanned the room, landing on the little drama unfolding between you and your ex. a smirk tugged at the corner of his mouth. “looks like i’m not the only one dreading this circus,” he drawled, loud enough for everyone to hear.
megumi, clutching a slightly crumpled report card, muttered, “dad, can we just sit down?”
toji ignored him, stepping closer to where you were standing. “need backup?” he asked, his tone teasing but with a glint of seriousness in his eyes.
your ex bristled, standing a little straighter. “this isn’t any of your business.”
“maybe not,” toji said, crossing his arms, “but if you’re gonna start a scene in front of your kid, might as well make it entertaining for the rest of us.”
you bit back a laugh, your shoulders relaxing for the first time since you’d walked into the room. your ex muttered something incoherent before storming back to his seat, clearly deciding he’d rather sulk than argue with toji.
“thanks,” you said quietly, glancing at him.
“don’t mention it,” he replied, waving a hand. “besides, i could use the distraction. these meetings are the worst.”
megumi sighed dramatically, dragging his dad toward the nearest empty seats. your daughter tugged on your hand, pulling you toward her spot. “sit next to me, mommy!” she insisted, her voice brimming with excitement.
and just like that, the weight of embarrassment lifted. maybe the pta wasn’t so dreadful after all.
stationery shopping ranked high on toji’s list of things he’d rather not do. it wasn’t just the hassle of navigating cramped aisles and overly enthusiastic sales clerks — it was the quiet longing he saw in megumi’s eyes. his kid had always been practical, never asking for much. a pencil and eraser were all he ever said he needed.
but toji wasn’t blind. he noticed the way megumi’s gaze lingered on superhero-themed pouches, colorful erasers, or fancy gel pens that clicked in three different colors.
today, however, megumi wasn’t eyeing superheroes. he stood rooted in front of the store’s most ridiculously pink setup — hello kitty galore. pink pouches, glittery pens, stickers with cartoon bows and sparkles. “what’re ya staring at, brat?” toji grumbled, leaning against the cart.
“nothing,” megumi mumbled, looking down at his sneakers.
toji raised a brow. “yeah, sure. ‘nothing’ has you glued there like a statue.”
“it’s for...her,” megumi muttered, barely loud enough to hear.
“her?” for a second, toji wondered if his kid had cooked up another imaginary friend. but then it clicked. “her” wasn’t imaginary — it was your daughter. ever since she had dragged megumi into practicing her ballet routine in the hallway, she’d been on his radar. toji had caught him talking about her in passing, dropping little comments about her sparkly shoes or how good she was at balancing on her toes.
toji scratched the back of his head, sighing. “alright, pick something out.”
megumi’s head snapped up, his eyes wide. “really?”
“yeah, really. just don’t make me regret it.”
a few minutes later, toji was standing in line with a glittery-pen set, the kind of thing he never thought he’d buy in his lifetime. at checkout, he stared at the receipt longer than necessary, grumbling about how overpriced stationery had gotten. still, he couldn’t shake the thought of megumi’s sheepish little smile when he picked out the pen set.
later that day, toji knocked on your door, the pen set in hand. when you opened it, he held the package out awkwardly. “here,” he said gruffly. “megs wanted to give this to your girl.”
you blinked in surprise, looking between him and the gift. “oh, uh, thank you. that’s sweet of him.”
“yeah, well, don’t make a big deal out of it,” he muttered, already turning to leave.
“wait.” you disappeared into the apartment for a moment before coming back with a box in hand. “give this to megumi. my daughter won it in a raffle at school and insisted it was for him.”
toji frowned, taking the box. when he opened it, his jaw nearly dropped. inside was a limited-edition action figure of megumi’s favorite superhero, still in its pristine packaging. “seriously?” he asked, glancing up at you.
you shrugged, smiling. “she said he deserves it for helping her with ballet.”
when toji handed the box to megumi later, the boy’s eyes went as wide as saucers. “this is for me?” he asked, his voice almost disbelieving.
“yep,” toji said, leaning against the doorframe, a smirk tugging at his lips. “from her.”
megumi cradled the box like it was made of glass, his face lighting up in a way toji hadn’t seen in a while. “she’s...cool,” he mumbled, his ears turning red.
toji snorted, ruffling his son’s hair. “yeah, kid. guess she is.”
it started with the clatter of plastic pots and pans echoing in the hallway. toji peeked out, ready to bark at whoever was making the ruckus, only to see your kid — a whirlwind in a frilly dress — dragging megumi out of the apartment by his wrist. toji frowned, leaning against the doorframe, arms crossed. “what’s she up to now?” he muttered to himself.
your girl had plopped her miniature kitchen set right in the middle of the hallway, setting it up with an authority that would make a professional chef jealous. “okay, megumi,” she declared, hands on her hips. “we’re playing house-house.”
megumi shuffled awkwardly, glancing at the scattered pink cookware. “uh...i don’t know how to play,” he mumbled, scratching the back of his head.
your daughter waved off his hesitation with a dramatic flourish. “it’s easy! you’re the dad, and i’m the mom, and we make dinner together.”
toji suppressed a snort. the dad, huh? poor kid.
but then megumi, shifting uncomfortably, mumbled, “what’s...a dad supposed to do?”
your daughter blinked at him, pausing her bustling activity. “you don’t know?”
he shook his head, his hands stuffed in his pockets.
“well,” she said, her tone matter-of-fact, “my dad doesn’t play house-house much. but it’s okay! we’ll just figure it out.”
toji’s chest tightened at her words, his grip on the doorframe unconsciously tightening. he didn’t think a kid’s game could hit so close to home, but there it was. she said it so simply, so innocently, like it was a fact of life. and megumi just nodded, kneeling down next to her and fumbling with a tiny plastic frying pan, like he was trying to make sense of a concept he couldn’t quite grasp.
when he glanced across the hall, he saw you standing there. you weren’t smiling. the look in your eyes was a mirror of his own — quiet, pained recognition. you knew. how could you not? this was your life too, wasn’t it? this strange, fragmented version of what a “home” was supposed to be.
and for once, toji didn’t have a quip or a grumble. he just stood there, watching his kid try to figure out what “playing house” meant, wondering if maybe the real problem wasn’t the game at all.
there were days when the weight of work pressed so heavily on your shoulders, you didn’t know if you’d make it to bedtime without breaking. days when you stared at your laptop screen, the relentless deadlines pounding in your head, and wondered if anyone cared enough to ask how you were holding up.
your daughter? what could you even tell an eight-year-old? that mamma’s work feels like it’s swallowing her whole? your ex? let’s not kid anyone — he didn’t give a damn.
so when you heard the faint knock on your door, you sighed, ready to dismiss whatever delivery or inconvenience had shown up at your doorstep. but it wasn’t a courier. it was megumi, standing there awkwardly, holding a casserole dish that looked far too heavy for him.
“uh, hi,” he mumbled, not meeting your eyes. “my dad said you should eat this. and, um...are you okay?”
you blinked, caught completely off guard. “i — yeah, i’m fine. why are you —”
“dad said you looked ‘off.’” he shifted his weight, staring at the floor like the words were a script he was forced to read. “so he made food. and, uh...he said you should eat it. or something.”
you stared at the casserole, the steam fogging up the glass lid, before your gaze moved back to megumi. “your dad sent you?”
megumi nodded, still not looking up. “yeah. but also...uh, you shouldn’t be sad. ’cause my teacher says work is like a big test. and you can’t cry during tests.”
you let out a soft laugh despite yourself. “is that so?”
“yeah,” he said, more confidently now. “and also...you should have cookies after tests. or...or, like, cake. something sweet.”
you crouched down so you were eye level with him, your exhaustion momentarily forgotten. “thank you, megumi. you’re very thoughtful.”
he shrugged, his ears turning red. “it’s just what people do, right?”
“you’re absolutely right,” you said, reaching out to ruffle his hair. “tell your dad thank you for the food, okay?”
megumi nodded, suddenly eager to escape, and darted back toward his apartment. as you stood, watching him go, you caught a glimpse of toji leaning against the doorway, his arms crossed, pretending like he wasn’t paying attention. your eyes met, and he gave a half-smirk, a silent acknowledgment that, yeah, he sent his kid over to do the emotional heavy lifting.
you didn’t know whether to laugh or roll your eyes, but as you brought the casserole inside and inhaled the warm, comforting aroma, you realized it didn’t matter. the gesture had worked.
and for the first time that day, you felt a little less alone.
toji leaned against the garbage chute, the crumpled bag dangling from his grip like the weight of his entire day had been stuffed inside it. his head was pounding, his nerves frayed, and the sheer mental load of keeping everything together made his chest feel tight.
just one drink, he thought. one drink to take the edge off.
but the thought of megumi catching even a whiff of whiskey on his breath, of being the kind of dad who needed an escape like that, stopped him cold.
that’s when you showed up, bag in hand, hair disheveled from a long day. you gave him a quick glance, your usual mixture of mild irritation and casual acknowledgment, before tossing your garbage into the chute.
“you look like hell,” you said bluntly, folding your arms.
“gee, thanks,” toji shot back, voice dripping with sarcasm. “needed that.”
you didn’t flinch. instead, you just leaned against the wall beside him, watching as he seemed to wrestle with something internally. you weren’t dumb — you could tell when someone was running on fumes.
“you ever feel like you’re drowning?” he asked suddenly, surprising even himself with the admission.
you blinked, caught off guard by his honesty. “constantly,” you replied, your tone softer than usual. “but i’m guessing you mean with the whole...single parent thing.”
toji chuckled dryly, shaking his head. “ding, ding. i don’t know how you do it. you make it look...effortless.”
“effortless?” you raised an eyebrow, almost laughing at the absurdity. “you think i have it together? newsflash, toji: my kid’s with me two days a week. that’s not parenting perfection. that’s a weekend babysitting gig.”
“still,” he muttered. “you make those two days count. i see it. i hear it.”
you exhaled, running a hand through your hair. “look, i don’t have all the answers. but what i’ve learned? you can’t do it all. not perfectly. no one can. and pretending you can is just setting yourself up to fail. so...cut yourself some slack. you’re not screwing up as bad as you think.”
he stared at you for a moment, the words sinking in like drops of water on parched earth. it wasn’t a grand revelation, but coming from you — iron mom of the year — it hit different.
“you really believe that?” he asked, his voice quieter than usual.
you shrugged. “not always. but it’s what i tell myself when i feel like i’m about to lose it. sometimes it helps. sometimes it doesn’t. but it’s better than drinking yourself stupid.”
toji’s eyes flicked to you, his brow furrowing. “how’d you —”
“please,” you cut him off. “you think i don’t know that look? seen it in the mirror too many times.”
he huffed out a laugh, shaking his head. “you’re something else, you know that?”
“so are you,” you countered, nudging his arm lightly. “whether you believe it or not. and whether you’ll admit it or not.”
he didn’t respond, just stood there for a moment, the faintest smirk tugging at the corner of his mouth. and as you turned to head back to your apartment, he found himself standing a little taller, the crushing weight of the day feeling just a little lighter.he still wouldn’t call it respect. but maybe, just maybe, he didn’t hate you as much as he thought.
your ex’s text had felt like a sucker punch, the kind that knocked the wind right out of you. you’d stared at the message for far too long, rereading his smug little declaration: “taking her on a trip she’ll never forget. don’t worry about the details.”
no invite for you, no mention of her asking for you — just a cruel reminder that he still had ways to hurt you. and for her birthday, of all things.
you spent the next two weeks in a fog. the silence in your apartment was deafening without her, no shrieks of laughter, no tiny footsteps running to show you her latest masterpiece. it felt like someone had pressed pause on your life, leaving you stuck in this unbearable limbo. every day you’d get up, go to work, and come home to the same aching emptiness. you even avoided the hallway, unwilling to face anyone — not even toji and megumi.
but then, one evening, as you were sorting through yet another pile of takeout containers, you heard a soft knock on your door. when you opened it, there stood megumi, clutching a piece of paper in his small hands. he shoved it toward you without a word, his face unreadable, before bolting back down the hall.
you closed the door, confused, and unfolded the note. it was written in uneven, colorful crayon strokes, the kind only a kid could produce:
dear y/n, pls come to my bithday party. we having cake and maybe pizza dad said okay i want you to come :) from megumi
your breath caught in your throat, and before you knew it, hot tears were streaming down your face. it was the kind of pure, innocent gesture that knocked down every wall you’d tried to build over the past two weeks. megumi didn’t know the weight of what he’d just done — how he’d given you a reason to get out of bed, to care about something again.
you clutched the note to your chest, letting out a shaky laugh through your tears. for the first time in weeks, you felt a flicker of warmth. maybe you couldn’t be there for your own daughter’s birthday this year, but for megumi? you’d show up.
and maybe, just maybe, you wouldn’t feel so alone.
toji swore he hadn’t stopped pacing since he woke up that morning.
megumi’s birthday.
the kid had been talking about it for weeks, dropping subtle (and not-so-subtle) hints about what he wanted. toji had done his best — got the decorations, ordered the cake, and even splurged on superhero-themed plates and napkins. but standing in the middle of his living room, now transformed into a battlefield of action figure balloons and capes, he couldn’t help but feel like a superhero himself — one on the verge of a breakdown.
megumi had insisted on handling the invites, which in hindsight might’ve been a mistake. the first arrivals were fine enough: yuuji and nobara, two of megumi’s classmates. yuuji was all boundless energy and chaos, while nobara strutted in like she was already running the place. “where’s the cake?” she demanded, hands on her hips. toji grunted and pointed toward the kitchen.
then came the wild card. the bane of his existence.
“tooojjjji!” gojo’s voice echoed through the apartment, loud and grating as ever. “heard there’s a party! didn’t wanna miss out.” he waltzed in, sunglasses perched on his stupidly perfect nose, a massive gift bag in hand that screamed overcompensating. toji pinched the bridge of his nose. why me?
and then, you. you stepped in, looking a little hesitant, holding a neatly wrapped present in one hand. megumi practically lit up when he saw you, rushing over to tug you inside. “you came!” he exclaimed, grinning ear to ear. toji froze for a moment, then scratched the back of his neck awkwardly.
“didn’t think you’d actually show,” he muttered, avoiding your eyes.
“megumi invited me,” you said simply, smiling down at the boy. “couldn’t say no to the birthday boy, now could i?”
toji grunted in response, but deep down, he was relieved. somehow, having you there made the chaos of the day feel a little more manageable.
the party was... chaotic, to say the least. yuuji inhaled pizza like it was a sport and promptly threw up in the kitchen sink, much to nobara’s disgust. “ewwwww, you’re so groooossss!” she shrieked, dodging as yuuji stumbled past her. toji was already on the phone with yuuji’s older brother, sukuna, who arrived not long after, looking pissed as hell.
“i told him not to eat like a damn vacuum,” sukuna growled, hauling yuuji out the door.
megumi, meanwhile, didn’t seem fazed by any of it. he was too busy showing off his new action figures to your daughter, who somehow managed to make it to the party just a few hours before her flight. you and toji exchanged a glance — a silent acknowledgment that, despite the chaos, the kids were happy.
and somehow, so were you.
with your daughter off on her dad's two-and-a-half-week escapade, you found yourself with something rare and unsettling: free time. the emptiness of your apartment felt heavier without her laughter filling the corners, so you did what any sane, lonely adult would do — you forced yourself to go out. and somehow, somehow, you ended up on a date with nanami kento.
god, he was perfect. the kind of perfect that made your chest ache. polite, well-mannered, and respectful, with a quiet intensity that felt... safe. he opened doors, listened like you were the only person in the world, and didn’t even bat an eye when you cried mid-dessert about how surreal it felt to be treated so kindly. nanami kento was a unicorn in human form. you left the date with a full heart and a nervous little hope tucked away in the corner of your mind.
but with that came distance. maybe you didn’t mean to pull back from the chaotic warmth of your hallway interactions with megumi and toji, but it happened all the same. when megumi called out a soft “hi” as you passed him by the mailboxes, you offered a quick smile but kept walking. the sink had been dripping for days, but instead of knocking on toji’s door, you’d booked a plumber. you weren’t doing anything wrong, you told yourself — they were just neighbors. neighbors.
not friends. not anything more than the people across the hall. right?
toji, though, noticed. the absence of your knock, the way megumi seemed a little more sullen, staring at the hall like he was waiting for someone. “you think she’s mad at us?” megumi asked one evening, poking at his rice.
toji’s response was a noncommittal grunt, but the truth was, he didn’t know. for some stupid reason, the distance stung. not that he’d ever admit it. not that he had any right to care.
you were just neighbors, after all.
when your girl came bounding through the door, her face glowing from the trip, the first thing she asked wasn’t about you or the gifts she’d brought back. no, it was, “how’s gumi? how’s uncle toji?”
the question hit harder than it should’ve. you realized with a pang of guilt how much distance you’d put between yourself and the fushiguros. brushing it off with a casual, “they’re fine,” didn’t sit well either. so, when your daughter insisted on running over to their apartment to see megumi, you didn’t stop her.
watching her skip down the hall, you thought it’d all smooth over naturally. kids were resilient like that, weren’t they? but then she came back. and she was crying.
between her sobs and hiccups, you managed to piece together the story. megumi, sweet, awkward megumi, had exploded in a torrent of childish frustration. how your daughter hadn’t been around. how you hadn’t been around. how he thought you both didn’t care anymore.
you felt your heart shatter as your girl bawled into your arms, her small hands clutching at your shirt. “why’s he mad at me, mama? i didn’t do anything!”
meanwhile, across the hall, megumi was in tears too, angrily wiping at his face as he sat cross-legged on the couch. “i hate her!” he shouted, voice wobbling. “she didn’t even say hi! she just left like everyone does!”
toji sat there, looking at his son, the beer he’d been nursing now warm and forgotten. the kid’s words were like a punch to the gut. he realized, with sinking clarity, that megumi wasn’t just upset with your daughter. the boy was lashing out because he felt abandoned.
when the knock came at the door, it was no surprise. you stood there, your girl clutching your hand, both of you looking just as frazzled as toji and megumi.
“we need to talk,” you said.
“yeah,” toji muttered, stepping aside to let you in.
the conversation wasn’t easy, with both kids sniffling, glaring at each other, and clutching onto their respective parents like lifelines. but as you and toji sat there, stumbling through apologies and promises to do better, you realized how much you’d hurt them by pulling away.
“friends don’t do this,” your girl said, wiping her tears with the back of her hand.
“yeah,” megumi added, glaring at his lap. “friends don’t just leave.”
and in that moment, you and toji exchanged a look. it was one of understanding, of shared guilt and resolution. you weren’t just neighbors anymore, were you? whether you liked it or not, you’d become something more — something messier, but ultimately worth fighting for.
the fight left behind a new set of rules — some spoken, others understood. your daughter would spend one hour with megumi every weekend, no negotiations. an additional hour was set aside for assisted ballet practice, with megumi reluctantly twirling around like an uncoordinated giraffe under her direction. and then, as if her creative pursuits weren’t already ambitious, she insisted on an hour of practicing makeup.
on a very, very unwilling toji.
the first time she smeared blush across his cheekbones, a bright pink mess, toji grumbled the entire time. “this is ridiculous. i look like a clown.”
“no, you don’t,” your girl countered with all the confidence in the world. “you look beauuuutiful.”
megumi snickered behind her, holding up a hand mirror so his dad could see the finished product. toji groaned, but the corners of his mouth betrayed him with the faintest twitch of amusement.
you leaned against the doorway, watching the scene unfold. the shared giggles, the clumsy but earnest teamwork — it was loud, chaotic, and beautiful in its own way. this was right. this was what you hadn’t even realized you were missing.
and kento? well, the date you thought could be something turned into a friendship you didn’t know you needed. he became a quiet presence, someone who checked in, who made you laugh when work got overwhelming, and who offered sage advice about life when you needed it most.
“you’re doing great,” he told you once over coffee, his calm reassurance soothing the doubts that often crept in.
between the budding chaos in your hallway ballet classes, the makeup artistry sessions that somehow always ended with toji pouting in pink lipstick, and the quiet stability kento offered, you realized that life had settled into something messy, imperfect, but undeniably nice.
maybe it wasn’t what you’d planned. maybe it wasn’t ideal. but as your daughter twirled around the room, megumi trailing after her with hesitant steps, and toji scowled half-heartedly at his reflection, you couldn’t imagine wanting anything else.
exam season brought chaos, but not the kind you'd expected. with your daughter spending extra time at her dad's house to focus on studying, the silence in your apartment felt foreign. that is, until megumi started showing up more often, knocking on your door with his usual grumbles.
"why isn't the test about superheroes or football?" he'd complain, dragging his workbook into your living room as though it carried the weight of the world.
you’d chuckle softly, pulling up a chair next to him. “if multiplication was about superheroes, what would the question even look like?”
megumi furrowed his brow, considering. “uh... like, if spider-man saved five people every day for a week, how many people would he save?”
you smiled, leaning in. “exactly. now, how would you solve that?”
somehow, tailoring the lessons to his interests worked wonders. before long, megumi wasn’t just tolerating study time — he was coming over more and more, plopping onto your couch like he lived there.
toji, on the other hand, didn’t know what to make of it. sure, he appreciated that you were helping the kid, but every time he walked past your door and heard megumi's laughter ringing out, he felt... off.
he chalked it up to jealousy at first. not the bitter kind, but the kind that made him wonder why megumi could so easily open up to you, share his frustrations and laugh like the world wasn’t on his tiny shoulders.
then there was the other feeling, the one he buried as quickly as it surfaced. it was... comfort. relief, even. seeing megumi so at ease with you, so happy, made something in his chest tighten.
it didn’t help that when megumi came home, he’d mention you in passing, the smallest smile tugging at his lips. “she said i’d ace the test if i think about it like superheroes. she’s kinda cool.”
toji would grunt, pretending not to care. “yeah, well, don’t get too comfortable over there.”
but the truth was, toji couldn’t decide if he envied you for being able to connect with his son so easily or if he was just... glad. glad that someone like you existed in megumi’s world.
he wouldn’t admit it, though. not even to himself. instead, he shut the feelings down, brushing them off like they were nothing. because, after all, you were just the neighbor who helped out when needed.
right?
toji had every intention of marching into your apartment to retrieve megumi with a grumble about bedtime. the kid was always strict about his sleep schedule — how the hell had he fallen asleep at your place?
but when he stepped inside, the sight stopped him dead in his tracks.
there you were, sprawled on the couch with megumi curled up next to you, both of you out cold. the TV flickered softly, playing megumi’s favorite superhero show. the coffee table was a chaotic mess of open textbooks, scattered pencils, and hastily scribbled notes.
toji stood there for a moment, unsure what to do with the weird tug in his chest. the scene was... domestic.
painfully so.
megumi’s head was resting on your shoulder, your hand loosely draped over his back like you’d done this a thousand times before. the way you were both nestled together was too natural for something that should’ve felt foreign. it made something warm and uncomfortable rise in toji’s chest, a feeling he wasn’t ready to name.
he took a step closer, leaning against the doorframe. his frown deepened, not out of anger but out of frustration — mostly at himself.
this wasn’t anything, right? this was just you being nice to his kid. helping him out with schoolwork and keeping him company because you were a good person.
but then why did his heart feel like it was trying to beat its way out of his chest? why did seeing you with megumi like that make his throat tighten?
toji ran a hand through his hair, sighing quietly.
“dammit,” he muttered under his breath.
he knew he should’ve woken the both of you up, taken megumi home, and gone about his night like this didn’t mean anything. but instead, he found himself lingering, watching the two of you for a moment longer.
did neighbors really do this? take care of someone else’s kid like they were their own?
and did neighbors treat each other with such quiet, subtle affection? the kind that slipped into actions rather than words — the casseroles when someone was too tired to cook, the soft smiles exchanged in passing, the way you’d text him about the latest sale on megumi’s favorite snacks?
toji shook his head, trying to shove the thought away. god forbid, he might actually like you.
it was supposed to be a normal monday morning. drop your girl off at her ballet studio, exchange a quick goodbye, and then head to work like it wasn’t eating you alive that she was growing up too fast.
but then toji came out, coffee in one hand and his other scratching the back of his neck as he leaned against the doorframe, clearly still waking up. “hey, kid,” he called to your daughter, motioning her over with a lazy wave.
what happened next made you freeze mid-turn, your keys jangling awkwardly in your hand.
toji knelt to her level, his gruff voice taking on an edge of sincerity. “listen up, girlie. when you’re up there, you give ‘em hell, alright? don’t let anyone tell you you’re not good enough. and don’t worry about messin’ up — just keep goin’ like it never happened.”
your daughter nodded with wide eyes, hanging on to every word, her little face lit with admiration.
and god, he was trying so hard to keep it clean. but every so often, a “shit” or “hell yeah” would slip out, sending her into a fit of giggles. she tried so hard to be serious, biting her lip to stifle her laughter, but the sheer ridiculousness of him attempting to be PG while still being him was too much for a nine-year-old.
megumi, standing nearby with his arms crossed, was clearly torn. his little scowl was stuck somewhere between annoyance at your daughter for monopolizing his dad’s attention and longing to be spoken to like that himself.
and your daughter? she latched onto toji like he was some kind of life coach, her arms around his neck, thanking him in that sweet, sing-song voice she always used when she was truly happy.
your fingers tightened around your keys as your chest did a stupid thing.
because here was toji, your grumpy neighbor who could barely keep it together when megumi so much as sneezed during homework time, and yet here he was giving your girl the kind of pep talk that should’ve come from her own dad.
and worse? she listened. eagerly.
you fidgeted with your keys like that’d distract you from the warmth creeping into your chest, from the realization that maybe, just maybe, this tough, foul-mouthed, perpetually tired man wasn’t just good with kids. he was good for you. god forbid, you might actually be falling for toji fushiguro.
it wasn’t your finest moment — double-booking a work meeting during your daughter's pickup. you were already spiraling into guilt, pacing the room while trying to find a way to make it work, when toji grumbled his way into volunteering.
“don’t make a big deal outta it,” he muttered, rubbing the back of his neck. “she’s comin’ over for megumi anyway. might as well save you the trouble.”
you barely had time to thank him before he was out the door, keys jingling in his hand.
but what toji walked into at your ex’s house was far from what he expected.
your ex was already on some power trip, standing in the doorway like he owned the world. the smugness on his face was palpable, and it only got worse when he saw toji, a man who didn’t give a damn about puffed-up egos.
“oh, so you’re her chauffeur now?” your ex sneered, leaning lazily against the doorframe.
toji ignored him at first, his sharp eyes scanning past him to find your babygirl. she was standing behind her dad, clutching her little backpack like it was a shield, her lips trembling as she peeked at toji with wide eyes.
“c’mon, kid,” toji said, his voice softer than you’d expect from a man like him. he extended a hand, but your ex stepped in the way.
“you got a lotta nerve coming here,” your ex spat, crossing his arms. “what, you think playing house makes you her dad?”
toji’s eyes darkened, his jaw tightening as he took a deliberate step forward. “nah,” he said coolly, his voice dripping with menace. “but i’m a helluva lot better at it than you.”
that set your ex off, his voice rising with insults and accusations, not even caring that his daughter was right there, watching the whole thing unfold.
and toji? he had it. his patience snapped like a brittle twig.
“y’know what’s funny?” toji growled, stepping so close your ex had to tilt his head back to meet his glare. “you’re standin’ here flappin’ your gums about bein’ her dad, but you’re too busy bein’ a selfish prick to realize what you’re doin’ to her.”
before your ex could stammer out another insult, toji hoisted your girl into one of his arms like she weighed nothing, shielding her with his broad shoulders as he glared down at your ex.
“don’t bother callin’. she’s got enough on her plate without dealin’ with your crap,” he bit out before turning on his heel and walking away, your girl clutching his shirt like it was her lifeline.
the ride back was quiet, your girl’s sniffles filling the air as toji’s hand rested protectively on the wheel. he didn’t say much — just an occasional grunt to reassure her. when they arrived, he handed her off to you without a word, but the fire in his eyes told you everything you needed to know.
and you? you were floored. because for all of toji’s grumbling and rough edges, he wasn’t just stepping up when you couldn’t — he was fighting for your girl like she was his own.
evening walks were supposed to be your moment of calm, a chance to clear your head after a long day. but calm went out the window the moment you saw megumi in the park, his usual quiet confidence missing as a group of older kids cornered him.
his small frame was tense, shoulders squared, but you could see the way his hands trembled as he balled them into fists at his sides. it wasn’t like megumi to let himself be pushed around, but whatever the bullies were saying had struck a nerve.
you didn’t even have to get close to catch the cruel words that slipped out of their mouths.
“no wonder your mom didn’t stick around.”
“bet she took one look at you and ran.”
“you’re just some charity case with a deadbeat dad.”
your heart twisted at the look on megumi’s face — his jaw clenched, eyes glassy with tears he refused to let fall. you weren’t his mom, but you felt the instinctive flare of protectiveness that made you forget every rule of decorum.
marching over, you didn’t bark at the kids or shoo them off like some passerby might. no, you planted yourself right beside megumi, crossing your arms with a look so sharp it could cut steel.
“is there a problem here?” you asked, voice calm but carrying a weight that made the kids shrink back.
they glanced between each other, suddenly unsure. “we were just talking —”
“talking?” you cut in, your tone sharp enough to make them flinch. “sounds to me like you’re all just jealous.”
the kids froze, confusion written all over their faces. “jealous of what?” one of them finally asked, voice cracking slightly.
you placed a hand on megumi’s shoulder, squeezing it gently. “jealous that you’ll never have the heart or the strength this kid has. it’s easy to gang up on someone when you’ve got a pack behind you. try standing on your own for once. but then again, maybe that’s asking too much.”
megumi didn’t say a word, but you felt him lean into your touch, his small hand brushing against yours as if testing its solidity.
the bullies sputtered, trying to save face, but one by one, they slunk away, muttering excuses as they disappeared into the distance.
the moment they were gone, megumi’s tough facade crumbled. his shoulders sagged, his head dropping as the tears he had been holding back finally spilled over.
you crouched down to his level, wrapping your arms around him as much as his wiry frame would allow. “it’s okay, sweetheart,” you murmured, brushing a hand through his unruly hair. “you’re okay now.”
and just like that, this tough, guarded nine-year-old melted into your embrace, his small sobs muffled against your shoulder.
you stayed there, holding him as the evening light faded, your heart breaking and swelling all at once. you weren’t his mom, but in that moment, you might as well have been.
toji wasn’t the type to lose his composure, not even when megumi brought home bruised knees or a bad grade. he was a man of steady hands and a guarded heart, but tonight? tonight was different.
he was sitting on the couch, beer in hand, when megumi hesitated in front of him, nervously fiddling with his sleeve. “dad, something happened today,” he mumbled, voice low.
toji raised an eyebrow, setting his drink on the table. “what kind of something?”
and then megumi started talking — about the bullies, about their cruel words, and then about you stepping in. how you stood there, firm and unyielding, pretending to be his mom without hesitation. megumi’s voice cracked when he got to the part where he cried in your arms, and toji swore he felt something shatter in him.
he didn’t know if it was anger, gratitude, or guilt — maybe all three twisting together into a storm that made his chest ache.
"you didn’t say anything stupid to her, did you?" toji asked, his voice rougher than he intended.
megumi shook his head quickly. "no, but... she was really nice. it felt... it felt okay."
toji sighed, running a hand through his hair as he leaned back into the couch. he should’ve been mad. should’ve been upset at megumi for dragging you into their lives like that, but instead, all he could think about was the way his chest tightened at the thought of you.
he needed to see you. not because he owed you, not because of some sense of duty, but because the idea of you stepping up for his kid like that made him feel something he hadn’t let himself feel in years.
he stood abruptly, grabbing his coat. megumi looked up at him, startled. “where are you going?”
toji paused for a moment. “i’ll be back. don’t stay up too late.”
megumi didn’t ask questions, just nodded and watched his dad leave the apartment.
when toji knocked on your door, he didn’t even know what he was going to say. a simple “thank you” didn’t feel like enough, but what else could he offer? the way his hands flexed at his sides and the way his heart pounded in his chest betrayed the calm exterior he was trying to maintain.
when you opened the door, he saw the surprise flash in your eyes. “toji?”
he rubbed the back of his neck, looking almost sheepish — a sight you never thought you’d see. “can i come in?”
and that’s when you felt it too — something bubbling between you both, something that had been building for a while, but neither of you had been ready to face. until now.
toji stood there, hands shoved into his jacket pockets, his eyes flicking between you and the floor like the words he was searching for might be scrawled on the ground. he wasn’t the kind of man who talked about his feelings, let alone spilled them out like this.
but he had to say something.
“look,” he started, voice low and gruff, “i’m not great with... this kind of thing.”
you tilted your head, waiting patiently, and that just made it harder for him.
he huffed out a breath, rubbing the back of his neck. “megumi told me what happened today. how you... stepped in. and, uh —” he paused, almost wincing at how clumsy his words sounded, “ — just... thanks. for being there. for him.”
you smiled softly, opening your mouth to respond, but he held up a hand, cutting you off. “no, wait. i’m not done.”
he shifted, clearly uncomfortable but pushing through it anyway. “it’s not just today. it’s all of it. you’ve done more for that kid than most people ever have. hell, more than i probably have, and i’m his dad.” his laugh was bitter, self-deprecating. “you didn’t have to, but you did. and i —” he faltered, swallowing hard.
you could see it then, all of it — the gratitude, the guilt, the admiration, the something more he was too scared to name. it was all there, plain as day in the way he looked at you.
he sighed, shoulders slumping as if the weight of his words had exhausted him. “just... thanks. for him. for me. for... everything.”
and maybe you didn’t need to say anything. because as clumsy and awkward as his words were, you understood. you really did.
so you stepped forward, just close enough that he couldn’t avoid meeting your eyes anymore, and gave him a small, understanding smile. “you don’t need to thank me, toji. i care about him. about you both.”
something flickered in his expression — relief, maybe, or something even deeper. he nodded, just once, and it felt like enough. no confessions, no big speeches.
just this.
something had changed, though neither of you dared to put it into words. it was in the little things, the quiet moments that made your lives blur together in ways that felt natural, almost inevitable.
like how megumi, who usually kept his friends at arm’s length, started demanding your baby girl's presence at every outing, loudly justifying it as “she’ll get bored otherwise,” when really, he just liked having her around. and during those movie nights, when the kids were too engrossed in the screen, you and toji sat closer than necessary, your fingers brushing as you both reached for the popcorn. neither of you pulled away.
it was in how you became megumi’s loudest cheerleader at his little league matches, rivaling even toji’s booming encouragement. and the way he’d grin at you like you were the reason he hit that home run, his awkwardly mumbled, “did you see that?” enough to warm your heart.
toji wasn’t any different. no matter how busy he was, he showed up to every single one of your baby girl's ballet recitals, clapping so obnoxiously loud at the end that even the other parents gave him side-eyes. and after each recital, he’d crouch down, looking absurdly out of place with his towering frame, to tell her exactly how amazing she was — always with a teasing grin and a “guess megumi’ll have to step it up to keep up with you, huh?”
and then there were the practices. toji, of all people, trying to mimic ballet moves while your daughter giggled at how his long legs never quite landed in the right positions. megumi tried to feign disinterest but ended up joining too, his face as serious as ever as he attempted a plié.
you’d think the makeup thing would’ve been too much for him, but no. those butterfly-drawn cheeks and glittery nails stayed with toji for hours after your daughter left, and he never wiped them off — not until bedtime. megumi pretended not to notice, but you’d catch him smirking when toji forgot to scrub off a particularly bright streak of pink before heading out.
it all felt so... domestic. so easy. yet, neither of you dared to name it.
because neighbors helped neighbors, right? neighbors went to movies together. neighbors cheered for each other’s kids. neighbors shared popcorn and let their walls crumble, piece by piece.
this was okay. just neighbors looking out for each other. nothing more.
...right?
until it wasn’t.
you barely managed to get out of the cab, your heels clicking against the pavement, your dress clinging uncomfortably after hours of fake smiles and firm handshakes. all you could think about was peeling everything off, crashing into bed, and hoping the world would let you sleep in for once.
but then you saw him — toji, leaning against your apartment door, his broad frame tense, his head snapping up the moment he heard your footsteps.
"where the hell were you?" his voice was rough, low, but not angry. it was something else.
you froze, your bag slipping off your shoulder. “what are you doing here?”
his eyes, bloodshot and desperate, locked onto yours, scanning every inch of you like he was checking for injuries. “it’s one a.m., on a thursday,” he said, his voice cracking slightly on the last word. “your lights were off. you weren’t answering your phone.”
it hit you then — he’d been worried. toji fushiguro, the man who grumbled more than he talked, who deflected every feeling with a snarky comment, was pacing the hallway outside your apartment because he thought something had happened to you.
“i had a business meeting,” you said, the exhaustion seeping into your voice. “it ran late.”
but your explanation didn’t seem to matter. he took a step closer, his shoulders sagging in relief but still stiff with whatever storm had been brewing inside him.
“you could’ve told me,” he muttered, running a hand through his hair. “what if something happened? what if —”
“toji.” your voice was soft, cutting through his spiraling thoughts.
he stopped, his hand dropping to his side as he looked at you, his expression raw and unguarded. he wasn’t just worried. he was terrified. terrified that whatever this strange, fragile thing between you might be, it could slip away in an instant.
and before either of you could think better of it, you closed the distance. your arms wrapped around his torso, pulling him into a hug that felt as natural as breathing.
he stiffened at first, his body caught off guard, but then his arms came up around you, pulling you closer with a quiet exhale that sounded like he’d been holding it in all night.
neither of you said a word. you didn’t need to. whatever this was — this thing that had been building between you — it was no longer just neighbors helping neighbors.
it was so much more.
sure, the hug wasn’t something life-changing, but it definitely shifted something, like a tiny crack in the wall that neither of you were ready to knock down completely. there was this... tension now. not bad, not awkward, just there. like some invisible thread pulling you two closer, though never quite crossing a line — both of you too cautious, too unsure, to see what might happen if you did.
and damn those kids. they picked up on it almost immediately, their sharp little eyes catching every glance that lingered too long or every time toji grumbled just a little less around you.
megumi, of course, was the worst of the two, his quiet observations turning into pointed stares and a knowing smirk that made you want to sink into the floor.
“so,” he started one evening as he watched you and toji navigate an unspoken argument over whether you’d be the one to drive the kids to practice. “are you gonna be my dad’s special lady friend now or what?”
you nearly choked on air, and toji’s head snapped around so fast you were sure he’d pull a muscle.
“megumi,” toji growled, the warning clear in his voice.
megumi just shrugged, completely unbothered. “what? i like her. she’s nice. and you’re less grumpy when she’s around. that’s what matters, right?”
toji pinched the bridge of his nose, muttering something under his breath about smartass kids. but there was a faint flush on his face, one that made you glance away quickly before your own cheeks betrayed you.
megumi’s logic was simple, blunt, and so very megumi. but it stuck with you more than you wanted to admit. if he was okay with whatever this was between you and his dad, maybe... just maybe, that was enough.
you sat cross-legged on the couch, sorting through some old receipts and papers, while your babygirl sprawled on the floor with her coloring book. the soft scratch of her crayons filled the room, a soothing sound that made the evening feel warm and easy.
“mom?” she asked, her voice cutting through the quiet.
you glanced up, tucking a loose strand of hair behind your ear. “yeah, baby?”
she didn’t look up from her coloring, her little fingers gripping the green crayon a bit too tightly as she focused on staying inside the lines. “i like him.”
you blinked, confused at first. “like who, sweetie?”
she paused, tilting her head as if the answer was obvious. “uncle jiji.”
the crayon stilled in her hand, and she finally looked up at you, her eyes wide and sincere. your breath hitched, a small wave of surprise washing over you.
“oh?” you tried to keep your tone light, your fingers fiddling with the papers in your lap. “why’s that?”
“he’s funny,” she said matter-of-factly, returning to her coloring. “and he’s nice. he always listens to megumi, even when megumi’s being bossy. and he told me i’m the best ballerina ever — even better than on tv!”
you couldn’t help the small laugh that escaped you. of course, toji had said that.
“he’s just really cool,” she added, as if that sealed the deal.
you set the papers down, your chest tightening in a way that felt both overwhelming and oddly comforting. her words felt like a weight being lifted off your shoulders, one you hadn’t even realized you were carrying.
“you really like him, huh?” you asked softly.
she nodded vigorously, her pigtails bouncing with the motion. “yeah. and megumi’s cool too. he always shares his toys, even his superheroes. i think he’s my best friend.”
the corners of your mouth tugged upward as you leaned back against the couch. “well, i’m glad you think so, baby.”
“do you like him?” she asked suddenly, her eyes locking onto yours, filled with that unnerving, sharp perception only kids seemed to have.
your cheeks warmed, and you glanced down at the papers in your lap, pretending to shuffle them aimlessly. “well… yeah, i think he’s nice too.”
she studied you for a moment before shrugging and returning to her coloring. “good. because you’re happy when you talk to him. and he looks at you like daddy never does.”
your breath caught. her words were simple, innocent even, but they struck something deep. you reached out, smoothing a hand over her hair.
“you’re pretty wise for someone not even ten yet, you know that?” you murmured.
she giggled, leaning into your touch. “i know.”
as she went back to her coloring, you leaned back into the couch, letting the relief settle in. maybe she was right. maybe this wasn’t so bad after all. maybe… it was something good. something you both deserved.
toji sat on the worn couch in his living room, staring blankly at the muted television. the house was quiet, save for the occasional shuffle from megumi’s room. it should’ve been peaceful, but instead, it felt like the silence was screaming at him, pressing all those thoughts he’d been trying to ignore right to the surface.
what the hell was this?
he leaned forward, elbows on his knees, rubbing a hand down his face as he let out a low sigh. you were in his house so often now that it was hard to tell where the line was anymore. your girl's kid-sized ballet slippers were right by the door next to megumi’s sneakers. a casserole dish you’d returned sat drying on the counter. you had this way of slotting into his life that felt so natural it scared him.
did he want to address it? maybe.
maybe not.
you were busy as hell — a working mom with your own kid to think about. toji wasn’t stupid. he knew what he came with. a nine-year-old son, a messy history, and enough emotional baggage to sink a ship. did he really want to drag you into all that?
but then there were moments, like tonight, when the kids had dragged you into some elaborate roleplay involving superheroes and ballerinas. you’d sat cross-legged on the floor, a makeshift cape tied around your shoulders, pretending to be "supermom," and he hadn’t been able to look away.
when you’d caught him staring, you’d just laughed, “what? do i have pizza sauce on my face or something?”
he’d grunted something noncommittal, shaking his head, but his chest had felt tight in a way he couldn’t explain.
and now, here he was, thinking about it again.
his thoughts were interrupted by the soft click of the front door opening. you peeked your head in, a sheepish smile on your face. “hey. sorry, megs forgot his backpack at my place. figured i’d drop it off before i forgot, too.”
he stood, shoving his hands in his pockets as you walked in, setting the backpack down by the door. you were still in your work clothes, your shoulders looking a little more tired than usual.
“you could’ve waited till tomorrow,” he muttered, his voice low but not unkind.
“it’s no big deal,” you replied, brushing him off.
he watched as you straightened, lingering in the doorway, and something about the way you hesitated made him speak. “you eaten yet?”
you blinked, clearly surprised by the question. “uh, no, actually.”
he motioned toward the kitchen. “there’s leftovers. you want some?”
your smile softened as you stepped closer. “sure. thanks, toji.”
as you walked past him, his hand twitched at his side, like it wanted to reach out but didn’t know how.
in the kitchen, you moved around like you belonged there, grabbing a plate and heating up the food. he leaned against the counter, watching you in silence, and for the first time, he let himself think about what it would mean to let this thing between you be more than unspoken.
“hey,” he said after a moment, his voice rougher than he intended.
you glanced at him over your shoulder. “yeah?”
he opened his mouth, then closed it, the words catching in his throat. instead, he just muttered, “nothing. never mind.”
you tilted your head, studying him for a second, before giving a small nod. “okay.”
but there was something in your eyes, like you knew what he wasn’t saying, and it made his chest ache.
he wasn’t sure if addressing whatever the hell this was would change anything, but seeing the way you fit into his life — into megumi’s life — made the idea of trying feel a little less terrifying.
it wasn’t like you and toji had made any grand declarations. it was all small things, gestures that felt normal but carried an undercurrent of something deeper. grocery runs were the easiest excuse. you’d bump into him on your way home, still in your blazer and heels, and he’d grumble about needing to pick up some snacks for megumi. before you knew it, you’d both be walking side by side, bickering over the best brand of chips.
“you’re seriously buying that brand?” you teased, holding up a bag of chips that toji had tossed into the cart.
“megumi likes ‘em,” he retorted, leaning on the cart with that stupidly casual confidence that annoyed you just enough to make your heart flutter. “and besides, it’s not like your kid’s picky when she raids our pantry.”
you rolled your eyes but smiled all the same, because he wasn’t wrong.
then there were the little fixes around your apartment that seemed to magically get done whenever toji was around. your leaky faucet, the busted door hinge, your temperamental car — he waved off every attempt you made to pay him. “mechanic perks,” he’d say with a shrug, wiping his hands on a rag and giving you a smirk that made you want to both thank him and punch him.
and those car rides? the ones where the kids didn’t even need to be there? yeah, those were starting to feel more like a habit. you’d offer to drop toji off after picking megumi up from practice, and somehow, the drive would extend into picking up your girl from ballet class.
“they gotta meet anyway,” toji would say, his tone so nonchalant it was almost believable. but the way his eyes softened when your babygirl came running out, arms wide open for both of you? that was something he couldn’t fake.
then there was the day your ex finally had enough of whatever this was. the two of you had shown up together, a united front, to pick up your daughter from his place. she’d lit up like a firework when she saw you and toji standing side by side, and you couldn’t help but revel in the sight of her running straight into toji’s waiting arms before hugging you just as tightly.
“this is the guy you’ve been parading around with?” your ex sneered, his voice dripping with disdain as he leaned against the doorframe. “what, you think a deadbeat like him is an upgrade?”
toji’s posture stiffened, his grip on your daughter tightening just slightly as she clung to his neck. you opened your mouth to retort, but toji beat you to it, his voice calm but laced with steel.
“funny coming from you,” he said, his eyes narrowing as he stared your ex down. “least i actually show up for her.”
your ex faltered, his face contorting in anger, but he didn’t have a comeback. you didn’t stick around long enough for him to try.
as you buckled your daughter into the car, her voice piped up, innocent and bright. “jiji, are you coming over for dinner?”
toji glanced at you, and for a moment, something passed between you. a silent understanding, an acknowledgment of whatever the hell this was.
“yeah, kid,” he said, ruffling her hair with a small grin. “i’m coming over.”
and for the first time in a long time, you didn’t feel like you were walking this road alone.
the house was warm with the kind of peace that only came after a long, chaotic day. your babygirl and megumi were a tangled heap on the couch, her tiny head resting on his shoulder while he leaned back with his mouth slightly open, fast asleep. the tv played muted scenes of superheroes saving the world, but the real action was in the kitchen, where you and toji stood shoulder to shoulder by the sink.
"you sure you’re not just washing that same plate for the third time?” you teased softly, nudging him with your elbow as he scrubbed with more focus than seemed necessary.
toji smirked but didn’t look up, his voice low and gravelly. “just making sure it’s clean. you don’t want megumi whining about leftover crumbs, trust me.”
you chuckled, rinsing another dish under the warm water, and for a moment, it was just the soft clink of plates, the jazz playing quietly from your speaker, and the faint sound of your daughter’s steady breathing in the living room.
but something was different tonight. the air felt heavier, charged, like it was holding its breath. you could feel it in the way toji’s arm brushed against yours as he passed a dish to you, in the way his fingers lingered a second too long when he handed you the towel.
“you really didn’t have to stay and help with this,” you said, glancing at him.
he shrugged, still not meeting your gaze. “figured i owed you. besides, you cooked. least i can do is clean up.”
his voice was quieter than usual, almost shy, and that wasn’t a word you’d ever thought you’d associate with toji fushiguro. it made something in your chest tighten.
you turned off the faucet, drying your hands as you looked over at him. he was still focused on the plate in his hands, but you could see the tension in his shoulders, the way his jaw was set like he was bracing himself.
“toji?”
he finally looked at you, and there it was — that softness in his eyes that he didn’t let show often. it made your breath catch, made the world feel like it had shrunk down to just the two of you standing in this little kitchen.
he set the plate down slowly, wiping his hands on a towel before turning to face you fully. for a moment, neither of you said anything. the jazz filled the silence, but the air between you was louder than words.
his hand came up hesitantly, brushing a strand of hair from your face, his calloused fingers grazing your cheek. “you’ve been good to him, y’know,” he murmured, his voice rough but soft in the way he said it. “to us.”
you didn’t know what to say to that. all you could do was nod, your throat tight as you looked up at him. his face was closer now, his gaze flicking between your eyes and your lips like he was searching for something — permission, maybe, or courage.
you didn’t even realize you’d moved until your hand rested lightly on his chest, feeling the steady thrum of his heartbeat beneath your palm.
and then it happened.
he leaned in, slowly, almost cautiously, and your eyes fluttered shut just as his lips brushed against yours. it was tentative at first, as if testing the waters, but when you didn’t pull away — when you leaned into him instead — it deepened.
toji kissed like he did everything else: fully, unapologetically, with an intensity that left you breathless. his hands found your waist, pulling you just a little closer, and you slid yours up to rest on his shoulders, feeling the strength there, the way he held you like you were something fragile and precious all at once.
the kiss wasn’t hurried or frantic; it was slow, deliberate, like he wanted to memorize every second of it. it was the kind of kiss that left your knees weak, your head spinning, and your heart pounding in your chest.
when you finally pulled back, both of you a little breathless, his forehead rested against yours.
“damn,” he muttered, his voice low and a little shaky.
you couldn’t help but laugh softly, your fingers still curled in the fabric of his shirt. “yeah,” you agreed, your voice barely above a whisper.
the moment stretched between you, warm and heavy and perfect. and for the first time in a long time, everything felt right.
megumi stirred awake first, his sharp eyes blinking groggily as he took in the scene. your baby girl was still curled up against him, her face smushed against his shoulder, and he wrinkled his nose, trying to shake her off gently without waking her. it was only when he looked over to the kitchen that he paused, his brain catching up with what he was seeing.
his dad. toji. standing ridiculously close to you by the sink, both of you talking in low voices like the world outside didn’t exist. toji’s hand brushed your arm lightly as he reached for a towel, and you laughed softly, a sound that felt too intimate for megumi to process this early in his half-asleep state.
“ugh, gross,” he mumbled under his breath, sitting up straighter and inadvertently jostling your babygirl awake.
she yawned, rubbing her eyes and giving him a confused look. “what’s gross?”
“nothing,” megumi said quickly, his face heating up as he avoided looking at her — or at the scene in the kitchen that was playing out like the ending of one of those superhero movies he loved but would never admit made him feel things.
by the time you and toji noticed the kids were awake, megumi had already schooled his expression into something neutral, though his sharp eyes flicked between the two of you as you made your way over.
“sorry for waking you up, sweetheart,” you said softly to your kid, crouching down to smooth her hair.
toji, ever the blunt one, crossed his arms and grunted, “time to get going, brats.”
megumi shot him a look, one that said you’re not fooling me, old man, but he didn’t say anything. instead, he stood up and stretched, deliberately not looking at how his dad’s gaze lingered on you for just a second too long.
at the door, the kids exchanged their goodbyes in their usual awkward but affectionate way — your baby girl giving megumi a quick hug that he tolerated with a huff.
toji ruffled megumi’s hair roughly, earning an annoyed grunt. “come on, kid. say thank you.”
megumi rolled his eyes but muttered a grudging, “thanks for dinner,” before looking up at you.
and then, because megumi was too perceptive for his own good, he added, “and for putting up with him.”
toji frowned, his brows knitting together. “watch it, smartass.”
but the way you laughed — soft and warm and filled with something megumi couldn’t quite name — made toji’s expression soften.
as you leaned down to hug your babygirl goodnight, megumi caught his dad watching you again, his face doing that weird thing it did when he was proud of a home run or secretly enjoying one of megumi’s superhero tangents.
“dad,” megumi said as they stepped into the hallway.
“what?” toji grunted, avoiding his son’s gaze.
megumi smirked, the kind that made him look way older than his nine years. “you’re doing that thing.”
toji frowned, feigning ignorance. “what thing?”
“you know. that thing my favorite superhero does when he saves his secret girlfriend,” megumi said with a dramatic air, glancing back at your door before looking at his dad again.
toji snorted, trying — and failing — not to look flustered. “quit it, kid.”
but megumi didn’t miss the way his dad’s lips twitched into the smallest of smiles. he knew exactly what was going on.
love? probably.
yeah, megumi was pretty sure his dad loved you.
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it was funny, really, how quickly time had flown. one moment, you were corralling a tutu-clad, glitter-faced babygirl to ballet class, and the next, you were breaking up arguments between her and megumi over whose superhero knowledge was superior.
"they’re literally fake, megumi!" she'd shriek.
"so are ballerinas in space!" he’d yell back.
and there you and toji would be, slumped at the dining table, each nursing a lukewarm cup of coffee as you exchanged weary, knowing looks.
“how do ten-year-olds even have this much energy?” you’d mutter, pressing your fingertips into your temples.
toji, half-laughing, half-grumbling, would reply, “they don’t. they’re siphoning it off us.”
it had been a year and a half of this — this weird, beautiful, chaotic thing you’d built. the kids, their shared antics, and the way they declared every single dinner a sleepover had woven your lives together so seamlessly that it felt like you’d never been apart in the first place.
but the truth? the sleepover excuse wasn’t just for the kids anymore. you and toji had grown so comfortable in this rhythm, this routine, that it felt like breathing. and yet, there was still this unspoken thing between you, hanging in the air like a question neither of you wanted to ask.
it was easy to ignore, easier still to pretend that this was just how things were. you’d watch as toji threw his head back in laughter at one of megumi’s sarcastic comments, his broad shoulders shaking, or when he’d lean in to help your girl tie her ballet shoes — his fingers oddly gentle for someone so rough around the edges. those moments made your heart ache in ways you didn’t want to name.
and then there was the way he looked at you when the kids weren’t paying attention. like when megumi would drag your babygirl out into the yard to “train” her in superhero moves, and you’d catch toji’s eyes lingering on you just a second too long.
“what?” you’d ask, your voice quieter than you intended.
“nothin’,” he’d say, but the way his lips twitched into a small smile betrayed him.
but you knew it wasn’t nothing. it hadn’t been nothing for a while now. and maybe it was time to stop pretending.
your ex hadn’t made it easy, of course. every time he paraded some new flavor of the month in front of your girl, you’d see the disappointment in her eyes, and it made your chest tighten. but then there’d be toji — steady, dependable, his quiet reassurances and the way he always managed to make her smile again.
“he’s better than dad,” she’d told you once, out of the blue, her voice small but firm.
and maybe that was the final nudge you needed.
the night felt heavier than usual, the quiet hum of the dishwasher and the occasional creak of the floorboards the only sounds accompanying you as you stood side by side in the kitchen. toji rinsed the last plate, handing it to you with a quick glance that lingered a little too long.
“they’re getting wilder,” he muttered, nodding toward the living room where your girl and megumi were sprawled on the sofa, limbs tangled as if they'd fought sleep until it finally won.
you chuckled softly, drying the plate and setting it aside. “they’re ten. this is the warm-up for what’s coming in a few years.”
he let out a low groan, running a hand through his hair. “don’t remind me. thought i’d have more time before the hormones kicked in.”
you smirked, leaning against the counter as he dried his hands on a dishtowel. it was domestic in a way that felt almost too intimate, like crossing an invisible line. and yet, neither of you had stepped back.
“toji,” you said, your voice breaking the comfortable silence.
he looked up, the weight in your tone pulling his full attention. “yeah?”
you hesitated, biting your lip as you fidgeted with the edge of the dish towel. how do you even start this? you thought about the past year and a half, the shared laughter, the quiet moments, the way his presence had become a constant in your life. the way your girl lit up when he was around. the way you lit up.
“this,” you finally said, gesturing between the two of you, your words coming out softer than you intended. “whatever this is... do you think we should talk about it?”
his brow furrowed slightly, and for a moment, your heart sank. but then he nodded, setting the towel down on the counter.
“i’ve been thinkin’ about it,” he admitted, his voice low.
“and?” you prompted, your heart pounding in your chest.
he sighed, leaning against the counter beside you, his gaze fixed on the floor. “look, i’m not great at this kinda thing,” he began, his fingers tapping absently against the edge of the counter. “but... you’ve been good for me. for megumi. hell, for both of us.”
your breath caught, and you turned to face him fully. “toji...”
he held up a hand, cutting you off gently. “lemme finish,” he said, his voice a little rough. he looked at you then, really looked at you, his eyes searching yours like he was trying to figure out how to say something he’d been holding onto for too long.
“i didn’t think this was gonna happen,” he said finally. “not for me. not again.” he ran a hand through his hair, exhaling sharply. “but you... you made it so easy. like it’s not somethin’ to be scared of. like it’s just... there. y’know?”
you nodded, your throat tight as you listened.
“and it’s not just about me,” he continued, his voice softening. “it’s about them. megumi... he’s happier than i’ve seen him in years. and your girl? she’s somethin’ special, and the way you’ve raised her... damn.” he shook his head, a small smile tugging at his lips. “you’re somethin’ else, you know that?”
you felt your cheeks heat, and you looked down, trying to compose yourself.
“so yeah,” he said, his voice steady now. “i don’t know what this is, but if you’re askin’ me if i want more of it... then yeah. i do.”
your breath hitched, and when you looked up, the sincerity in his eyes made your chest tighten.
“toji,” you said again, your voice barely above a whisper. “i’ve wanted to say something for a while now, but I didn’t know how. you’ve been... everything we didn’t know we needed. me and my girl. you’ve been there in ways no one else ever has, and it’s just... it’s so easy with you. i want this too.”
his lips curved into a small, relieved smile, and for a moment, the weight of the unspoken words between you lifted.
“yeah?” he asked softly, his voice almost teasing.
you smiled back, nodding. “yeah.”
and then, like it was the most natural thing in the world, he reached out and pulled you into a hug. it wasn’t rushed or desperate — it was steady, grounding, the kind of hug that felt like coming home. and when he whispered, “i’m all in if you are,” into your hair, you felt the last of your hesitation melt away.
because with toji, love wasn’t just a possibility — it was a promise.
. ݁₊ ⊹ . ݁˖ . ݁. ݁₊ ⊹ . ݁˖ . ݁. ݁₊ ⊹ . ݁˖ . ݁
another two years later, and the kids were twelve. twelve. a big deal, according to them. suddenly they were "basically teenagers," and with that came a whole new level of attitude and pride. and you and toji? you were more than grateful for the chaos. or, as he liked to tease, “engaged to it.” yeah, engaged. took the man long enough — three and a half, maybe four years — but who’s counting?
your kids, of course, had taken the news with the kind of casual confidence only twelve-year-olds could muster. “about time,” megumi had muttered, earning an elbow in the ribs from your girl, who’d just grinned and said, “told you he liked her.”
and publicly? they carried themselves with the kind of poise that made you and toji bite back laughter more than once. “yeah, that’s my dad,” your girl would say with a shrug as toji dropped her off at ballet, towering over all the other dads and somehow looking both intimidating and incredibly proud as she disappeared into the studio.
megumi was just as bad. “that’s my mom,” he’d say to anyone within earshot at his little league games, pointing you out as you cheered the loudest from the stands, sometimes alongside toji who couldn’t help but smirk at your enthusiasm. “and yeah, that’s my sister,” he’d add, nonchalantly, as if it wasn’t a big deal that they’d practically become inseparable siblings over the years.
of course, behind closed doors, they were just kids. kids who still watched superhero movies while pretending not to, kids who choreographed ballet routines to superhero soundtracks because cool kids don’t watch superhero movies.
and you? you were still on that hustle, balancing work, motherhood, and planning a wedding with the kind of grace that made toji shake his head in awe every time.
“how do you do it?” he’d asked one night, watching you juggle your laptop and the kids’ school schedules.
“coffee and pure spite,” you’d replied, smirking over the rim of your mug.
toji, though? he’d built something solid too. his mechanic shop was finally open, a dream he’d quietly nurtured for years. seeing him in his element, sleeves rolled up, hands covered in grease, and that signature smirk plastered across his face, was enough to make your heart skip a beat every damn time.
life wasn’t perfect — there were still late nights, homework battles, and the occasional tantrum — but it was good. no, scratch that. it was damn good.
produced by creamflix on tumblr. all rights reserved. do not copy, steal, modify, repost. banners by cafekitsune — support your writers by liking and reblogging. ♡
#jjk x reader#jujutsu kaisen x reader#jujutsu kaisen x fem!reader#jjk x female reader#jjk x fem!reader#jujutsu kaisen x female reader#jjk x y/n#jujutsu kaisen x you#fushiguro toji x you#fushiguro toji x reader#toji x y/n#toji x you#toji x reader#toji fushiguro x you#toji fushiguro x reader#fushiguro x you#fushiguro x reader#fushiguro x y/n#toji zenin x reader#toji zenin x you#jjk oneshot#jujutsu kaisen oneshot#toji oneshot#toji fushiguro oneshot
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On narrow, shaded streets we amble among the crowd, past at all the little souvenir shops hawking bags and t-shirts, postcards and beaded bracelets. I grin at a magnet of a little fat faced chef, riding a vespa with a pizza in his hand. Something about his expression reminds me of Jonas.
“My stepdad used to buy magnets like that all the time,” Astrid says when I show her. “He thought they were so funny, but my sisters and I hated them. Their faces are creepy. They leer at you. The day he broke up with our mother, we threw them immediately into the trash.”
I buy it anyway.
Outside a craft shop, she plucks a ceramic jug from a shelf to scrutinise. It is hand-painted in with delicate foliage in blue paint. “I think I could make something like this at university, don’t you?”
“Well, maybe this trip will inspire a collection of work for your pottery class,” I say, and she lifts it up to the sun, glinting upon the glaze.
“It’s beautiful.”
“Would you like it?”
She smiles. “I would. It’s so unusual.”
I get it for her, then carry the little package, wrapped carefully in tissue paper, around as she flits from store to store, finding inspiration in the art she sees. Inspiration comes to me, too, in the colours, the shapes, the slash of sky in negative space between buildings. I photograph it all. The fruit stands little dogs sleeping in doorways, bougainvillea cascading down whitewashed buildings, and laugh with delight as a little yellow car squeezes a path through a crowd of pedestrians. I marvel at this little town, and all the pockets of the world that still cling to so much charm.
“This is exactly what I needed,” says Astrid, on the terrace of a cafe overlooking the sea.
“Coffee?”
“Yes, and all of this. The sun, the air. I have been so tired of Berlin lately, and the sky being so grey.”
“You’ve been bored.”
“A little, yes.”
We order coffees. Ristretto for her, Americano for me. The server eyes me with some savage combination of amusement and contempt. I imagine his thoughts. “Of course you would order this, American boy,” the man in my head says, and I force myself to smile at the real one. “Thanks”.
“Grazie.” Astrid hisses.
“Oh, alright. Grazie. Sorry.”
As he returns with our order, he says something to Astrid in Italian. She responds, then him, and in front of me they have an entire conversation I cannot understand. I sit, sip my coffee, and wait for them to finish. Whatever he is saying, he’s very enthusiastic about it, gesticulating, hands moving passionately. I try not to be bothered when he points at me, and Astrid laughs at whatever he has to say, even though the heat of embarrassment rises to my face. If he’s saying something about me, I can’t defend myself. How frustrating it is not to understand another language being spoken right in front of you. Eventually, he leaves, and she simply straightens her dress underneath her and takes a dainty sip of her coffee.
“What were you two talking about?” I say, after several moments.
“Oh, nothing really. He was just asking me where we are from.”
“Right.” I trace the rim on my cup with my fingertip. “Just I think I understood something he said to you.”
Her brows rise in dull surprise. “Oh?”
“Bella,” I say, “As in, beautiful.”
“Oh, yes, he was talking about the weather. ‘Una giornata bella’, he said. ‘A beautiful day’.”
“What did he say about me?”
“About you?”
“Yes. When he pointed at me.”
“He said you don’t look Danish, and I agreed, because you aren’t.”
“Oh.”
“You’re self conscious?”
“No, just, I didn’t know what he was saying. I didn’t know if he was flirting with you in front of my face.”
“Italian men are very passionate about a lot of things. Perhaps it looked like that, but he was being friendly.”
I exhale a laugh. “Giornata bella, huh?”
“If he said ‘bella’ regarding me, it wouldn’t be okay?”
I pause. “Well, I don’t know. Calling another guy’s girlfriend beautiful in front of him is kind of on the line between okay and not okay, don’t you think?”
A shrug. “What if it’s true? Shouldn’t we allow people to appreciate beauty? To see it, and say something? What if I like to hear it? Would you prefer to see me locked away from the world?”
“Of course not,” I scoff. “I’m not one of those weird boyfriends that only wants you for myself.”
“I’m glad you said that,” she gazes at a lone seabird, whirling, spiralling above the bay. “Because I could never handle that. That will never be how we are.”
I smirk. “Yes, ma’am.”
Beginning // Prev // Next
#lucky boy 2011#sims 4#ts4#sims 4 story#sims story#sims storytelling#sims 4 storytelling#simblr#simblr story#show us your story#show us your sims
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Turkey Trouble - A TSATS Thanksgiving One Shot
You try to make Thanksgiving dinner for your newly adopted niece, Ellie, but need some help from Joel. A one shot set in the The Savage and the Sanctuary universe.
Pairing: Bodyguard!Joel Miller x Movie Star!Female Reader (from The Savage and the Sanctuary)
Length: 1.7k
CW: SFW; lil angst; modern no outbreak AU but Sarah is still dead (sorry Joel); NO SMUT; no use of Y/N; whole fic this is set in has mature themes and will have smut so minors DNI 18+ only
A/N: You can thank @diversemediums for this because she gave me the brain rot. This would be harder to read as a stand alone fic but it can be done with the understanding that Joel is reader's bodyguard and they have an antagonistic relationship. Reader has recently adopted her best friend's daughter, Ellie, after her friend's death. I'm not sure yet if this is canon or not but it could be? I haven't written to this time in the story yet but I THINK this is about where they'll be emotionally at Thanksgiving.
Joel hated Thanksgiving.
He used to like it. Back when he was a father he liked it. He and Sarah would watch the parade, he’d make cinnamon rolls and the whole dinner spread, Tommy would bring over burnt mac and cheese and the three of them would go to Waffle House and to pick out a Christmas tree the next morning.
Now, it was all a reminder of everything he’d lost, of just how little he had left to live for.
So he took his time getting out of bed on Thanksgiving morning, not looking forward to spending the day missing something he could never have again, something that seemed even more painful when he was facing it with you and Ellie.
But, eventually, his need for coffee forced him to move and he padded to the kitchen, not bothering to change out of the flannel pants and t-shirt he’d slept in.
Ellie was on the couch with a mug of cocoa and a cinnamon roll, the parade on and she smirked at him.
“Well don’t you look pretty in the morning,” she teased.
“It’s Thanksgiving,” he said, trying to not take his foul mood out on the kid he’d become overly fond of in the last few months. “Not in the mood for a fashion show today.”
“Oh so the jeans are a fashion show,” she said. “Got it.”
He rolled his eyes and headed for the kitchen.
“Careful,” she called after him. “She’s in a mood.”
“Great,” he muttered, pressing on, anyway.
You were, indeed, in a mood, standing at your massive kitchen island with a turkey that was far too big for the number of people you were feeding, frowning at a recipe, your hands covered in butter.
Joel snorted.
“The hell are you doin’?”
You looked up to find him, seemingly surprised to find him there.
“Making a turkey,” you said. “What does it look like?”
“Looks like you’re making a mess,” he said, going around you for the mugs and pouring himself a cup of coffee.
“Well, cooking is messy,” you said, chin up defiantly.
“Not that messy,” he said, smirking a little as he leaned back against the counter, crossing an arm over his chest while he drank his coffee. “Where’s Esmo.”
“It’s Thanksgiving,” you said, incredulous. “I’m not about to ask her to work.”
“Right,” he said, even though he definitely should have seen that coming when he thought about it. “You ever made a Thanksgiving dinner before?”
“None of your business,” you said, going back to the turkey and trying to smear butter over it and failing.
“It is if I’m stuck using this kitchen,” he said. “You’re gonna get salmonella everywhere.”
You glared at him.
“Well there’s a first time for everything,” you said. “And all I have to do is follow the recipe, so…”
Joel shoved himself off the counter and looked over your shoulder, down at the recipe. It was not, as he’d expected, some bullshit celebrity cookbook but a simple, handwritten index card.
He skimmed the instructions and realized that there were parts missing that were probably simple assumptions that you just didn’t know about.
“Where’s this from?” He asked.
“Anna,” you said. “Ellie’s mom. She’s hosted Thanksgiving and made a legitimately amazing turkey, Ellie loved it even as a little kid. I should have paid more attention last year but I was stupid and I didn’t and I just want Ellie to have a normal Thanksgiving and I have Anna’s recipe and I just need to figure it out…”
Joel’s chest tightened at that. You wanted Ellie to have a good Thanksgiving, a holiday that was like the ones she had before her mother died. She deserved that. And Joel understood why you’d be dead set on being the one to give it to her.
He cleared his throat before he got too choked up, trying to remind himself of the distance he’d been struggling to maintain with you.
“Well, you’re doing it wrong,” he said, taking a sip of coffee.
You glared at him.
“Unless you’re some Thanksgiving dinner expert…”
“Made more than you have,” he said, almost smug.
“Really,” you said brows raised, incredulous. He shrugged. “You’ve made a turkey.”
“Sure,” he said. “Plenty. Not sure if you know this but most people don’t got private chefs at their beck and call…”
“Oh, fuck off.”
“Do you want my help or not?” He asked.
“I wasn’t aware you were offering,” you said.
“Well,” he shrugged. “I am.”
You ground your teeth for moment before you sighed, literally throwing up your hands.
“Fine,” you said. “Show me.”
“Well,” he said, putting his cup down. “For starters…”
He stuck his hand inside the cavity of the bird and found the neck, pulling it free and holding it up.
“You gotta take this out.”
You laughed and groaned.
“Jesus,” you said. “Alright, Big Miller, show me how it’s done.”
Joel had to give you credit, you’d done a better job than he’d expected once he took a closer look at the bird. He helped get the rest of dinner ready to go, giving you smaller tasks to do while he managed the turkey. With the two of you working together, you were both able to make it to the living room before the parade was done, sitting on either side of Ellie and watching the musical acts perform and the floats go by.
Part of him hurt, sitting there with a girl who wasn’t his daughter doing something that had once felt sacred. He didn’t let himself hurt like that anymore, he tried to drown it or shove it down deep as best he could but sometimes he just couldn’t. He couldn’t now.
But, for some reason, it didn’t bother him the same way this time. Hearing Ellie make a bad pun (“Did you know they took turkey off the menu for Thanksgiving? I suspect fowl play.”), watching you bob your head in time to a musical number, smelling the turkey once it had been in the oven for a bit, even the taste of the coffee with the cinnamon roll warmed something inside him. The pain of loss was still there but so was this strange sense that it didn’t need to consume all of him. That there could be moments worth living for, things that weren’t defined by the missing pieces - even if that piece felt like everything.
You got the hang of basting relatively quickly and Joel showed you how to make the other Thanksgiving staples, things that he’d once made for his daughter that he was now making for the girl who had become yours. When Elise, Ellie’s grandmother, came over that afternoon, things had come together well.
“Where’d you learn how to do this?” You asked Joel as you arranged the last of the dishes on the laden dining room table. “You don’t strike me as the chef type.”
Joel looked at you for a moment and considered telling you the truth, at least for a second. Part of him wanted you to know this, know him.
But he couldn’t bring himself to say it, her name getting stuck in his throat.
Instead he just shrugged, setting down a bowl of mashed potatoes.
“Tommy ain’t much of a cook,” he said. “When our mom died, Thanksgiving didn’t make itself.”
You cocked your head at him for a moment, like you were trying to decide if he was telling the truth, and then nodded slowly, like you were filing information away.
“Well, thank you,” you said. “You really did save the day.”
He shrugged again and took his place at the table with you, Ellie and Elise.
When the meal was over and the dishes were done, he tried to keep to his room but instead found himself drawn away, something inside him tugging him toward the rest of the world. He went to the living room and found you on the couch, your legs tucked alongside yourself as you watched a movie.
“Leftovers are in the fridge,” you said, barely glancing his way.
He grunted and acted like he was walking toward the kitchen but, instead, stopped behind the couch, watching the movie, too.
“What is this?” He asked eventually.
You glanced over your shoulder at him and then back at the screen.
“Love, Actually,” you said. “I used to watch it with Anna after Ellie was in bed on Thanksgiving. Have you seen it?”
“Heard of it,” he said. “Ain’t seen it, though.”
“It’s these individual stories about all these different kinds of love. I’m only a few minutes in if you want to watch,” you said, looking at him almost hopefully. He was taken aback, silent for a beat too long and you shook your head. “Never mind…”
“No,” he said quickly. “Just… yeah, I can watch.”
“Yeah?” You asked, brows raised.
“Sure,” he shrugged. “Not like I’m going fuckin’ black Friday shopping in the morning.”
He sat on the opposite end of the massive couch from you but, over time, drifted closer until the two of you were beside each other. Not touching but a sense of familiarity he wasn’t used to anymore hanging over you both.
“So,” you said when the movie ended, tears clinging to your eyelashes. “What’d you think?”
“Not bad,” he said. “Not sure it’s my thing but… not bad.”
You smiled a little at that.
“I should get to bed though,” he said.
“Right,” you said, drying your eyes as he got up. “Hey, Joel?”
“Hm.”
“Thank you,” you said. “For everything you did today. I’d have fucked it all up without your help and Ellie deserves better and just… thank you.”
“Sure,” Joel said. “It… it was nice. Best Thanksgiving I’ve had in a while.”
“Really?” You asked, brows raised.
He nodded, the truth of that clutching hard at his chest, just how much you and Ellie had come to mean to him in the months he’d been protecting you, this keen vulnerability settling in him at that thought.
But he’d deal with that later. He wasn’t going to let it ruin shit now.
“Yeah,” he said. “It was.’
#joel miller x female reader#joel miller x reader#joel miller x you#thanksgiving fic#the savage and the sanctuary#tsats
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hi, hello!! i absolutely adore your deep dive series into the aaa episodes, and i was wondering if you could/would feel like expanding further into agatha’s guilt towards wanda and all the emotion she shows in the first episode, when she sees wanda’s corpse? the way agnes seems to value human life is especially interesting to me, considering how much agatha has killed (and i understand agnes is a character in what’s supposed to be a very stereotypical detective series, but i remember how you said agnes is in some ways agatha at her most transparent). anyways, i thought i’d try to pick your brain a little more on the subject, because your takes are very interesting to me!
Hi hello to you, thank you for stopping by! And also thank you for your interesting question, consider my brain officially picked. I'm gonna ramble QUITE a bit because I want to talk about Agatha and misogyny first (as requested by @leoleolovesdc ) but hold in there, I'll get to wanda too.
To get to the point directly, I think that Agatha's actions are steeped in internalized misogyny, and I think it's something she inherited from her mother and the salemites. It's actually pretty common for marginalized communities or individuals to turn against their own and replicate the patterns of the oppressor, looking to ease their self-hatred or for outside acceptance or a sense of control. Think for example about super conservative wives voting against their best interests, think about all the homophobia and biphobia and transphobia and acephobia (etcetera etcetera ad infinitum) in the queer community.
The persecution of witches was essentially a war on a kind of womanhood that went against imposed gender norms. Witches (in the marvel universe and in real life) were more often than not women who lived independently, who knew herbs, who didn't marry, who worked as midwives etc. And talking about the salemites specifically and the way they treated Agatha: they did to Agatha what the external world did to them, they replicated a pattern. They targeted the odd one out, the woman in their group who was the most different, and called her evil and essentially tried to burn her at the stake.
We don't know a thing about evanora, but I would BET that a lot of her hatred stems from her own internalized misogyny / agatha being born female, and I honestly wonder if Agatha would have found it harder to love a daughter the same way she does Nicky or Billy, without any of her internalized bias kicking in. Since she was a kid Agatha had been hurt and persecuted by other witches, she's pretty much wired to mistrust and hate them. And it gets even more muddled and complicated because she hates witches but loves witchcraft, she hates women but is sexually and romantically attracted to them. She yearns to belong, but she ends up torturing and killing her own community. She allies with people like that disgusting prick who violated Jen.
Enter Wanda, who is essentially Agatha 2.0: she was born doomed by the narrative or, to say it like evanora, she was born evil. Evanora would have had a FIELD DAY with Wanda. The Scarlet Witch? The destroyer of universes? She would have tried to kill her on the spot. There is A LOT Agatha instinctively hates in Wanda, she's a woman, she's a witch, she's dangerous. Agatha does what the salemites did to her and what men did to witches: she replicates a pattern. She punishes Wanda for being too alone and too different and complicated and scary. And yes Agatha is doing it to get her hands on chaos magic and all that comes with that, but this is all the baggage she brings in.
There's the other side of the coin: Agatha hates women and witches, Agatha loves women and witches, and Agatha hates and loves Wanda. She's been essentially killing and running away for the past two centuries, refusing to dwell on the consequences of her actions, but we know that she is no unfeeling psychopath, that's just a role she plays. We know all her actions weigh on her. With Wanda that sense of guilt is even stronger because Wanda is not a random witch she kills and abandons in the woods, she has to live with her and witness all of Wanda's pain up close, how lonely she is, how scared she is, the grief of losing Pietro and Vision, it's all there to torment Agatha. She cannot be a child about it, she can't close her eyes and cover her ears and go lalala until it's over, she has to take it all in order to get what she wants. And what's worse, Wanda is so similar to her that Agatha can picture exactly what she's feeling down to her bones, that's empathy to the max. And she goes through with her plan and does horrible things to Wanda anyway.
Knowing Agatha like we know her now, I'm convinced that her guilt about Wanda is especially hard to deal with, but Agatha has always refused to deal with any of her inner struggles, so Wanda just goes on the pile together with all the painful and complicated feelings she's pointedly ignoring, and which are not haunting her at all, thank you very much!
Except when she's Agnes, because all the feeling are still there but she doesn't know where they come from. I'd say that more than transparent Agnes is unfiltered, she doesn't know she should censor her struggles like Agatha does. Based on Agnes, we can plainly see what the biggest issues on her Inner Pile of Shit and Sorrow are: grief over Nicky's loss, anger and yearning for Rio, extreme loneliness, and guilt over those she hurt, with a particular emphasis on Wanda.
#asks#agatha all along#wandavision#agatha harkness#wanda maximoff#character study#oh boy this one took a life of its own#do you want monster essays?#do you want to witness me go on and on and on and on and on anout silly comicbook characters?#say no more
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I hope this doesn't come off the wrong way, but I'm sort of confused about waking up next to you. Of course I love it and I think it's written so brilliantly and the trope is genuinely so unique. But I'm confused about what's actually the conflict in the story—is it her dreaming(or coming into this world) or is it whatever happend to the real yn? And like, if Rafe and Yn are dating and all that, why is there no real romantic moment bw them?
no worries, n thank u sm !
“WAKING UP TO YOU” FULL PLOT BELOW (bc lowkey i made it long)
but yea, the whole idea is reader lives a normal life, obx exists in her life but only as a tv show so drew, cline, bailey, rudy, every actor is just an actor in ur world.
its mentioned sometime in the series that a few days before “the wake up,” u have had these bad headaches or something that u assumed were just migraines,
(essentially its the mind getting ready for “the switch”)
but u wake up one morning, no headaches, u feel great, but u wake up next to rafe, a fictional character.
its weird, of course its like “what the fuck is going on” & assuming its a prank,
u have to go along with the day just thinking that ur dreaming or something—its the only idea that can make sense,
but people have issues with u, u dont get whats going on, its kind of obvious theres been some drama before u even got here,
but by the end of the night ur ready to go home because this has to be just a one day experience right?
WRONG. 😭
u wake up the next day in the same universe, and i dont wanna get into all the science fiction stuff but reader soon figures out there are just billions & billions of alternate universes,
so there was a y/n in this alternate world ur stuck in, like a doppelgänger,
(& this still begs the question: did that reader & that y/n switch bodies? is y/n living in the readers life rn too? but i kind of want to keep that theory open so u guys can think what u want)!
the whole purpose of u being stuck in this one is this world revolves around the readers doppelgänger who apparently has been a very spoiled, selfish kook all her life,
but spoiled n selfish people dont always get a pass in life. obviously people are going to hate her. its expected for her to lose friendships & potentially even rafe someday,
to prevent that, doppelgänger wants to turn a new leaf, actually be generous, genuine, kind,
but doppelgänger is nowhere near generous, genuine, & kind.
it gets to a point where we see in her journals that shes actually trying, but it always boils down to a point of “ur still the person u always have been,” “u dont try hard enough,” “ur a hypocrite”
& its driving doppelgänger mad because its like wtf?
a few weeks before the wake up, doppelgänger is said to have been isolating herself in response to all the rejection, ultimately cutting off ties with everyone but rafe, her bf.
if she does talk to someone, it turns into arguments.
all she wanted was to change.
people are worried, concerned because now doppelgänger isnt talking to anybody but rafe tbh, sometimes to sarah or any of the camerons because shes been living with them recently,
and we learned in my most recent part that last week, apparently doppelgänger and sarah had a fight.
theres this unique, once-in-a-probably-just-this-one-time opportunity that doppelgänger gets to have someone take her place,
that person being the reader.
(the pick was strictly by luck, but also as a reward to basically spend ur days with A HOT CAST LIKE OUTER BANKS HAS)
reader was chosen out of everyone bc of their kind heart. theyre warm through n through, this world needed someone like that for rafe, for doppelgängers friends, for everything.
but its kind of a learning experience for reader too—step out of ur comfort zone, solve a puzzle of life,
and of course i feel like if we were all in obx, we wouldnt want to leave.
SO i had to propose the new singularity which is: the longer u stay here, the worse ur memories get, & u wont remember anything about ur real life, eventually also forgetting that ur not from this world & have ur own to get back to.
reader will realize “this life is great, but its not for me” & dedicate themselves on getting back to the real world,
but in the meantime, reader finds out she has to mend broken relationships in order to get each memory back & eventually get back home.
as far as intimacy goes, maybe its just been a while since i wrote any kiss or whatever since night 1, which was the shameless hookup😭
id imagine reader is still shaken by the fact that they didnt end up waking up in their real world but that still means rafe can initiate the kisses—idk why i havent written them,
okay next chapter guys ur having full blown sex again.
jk!
or maybe u will.
if ur still asking questions, blame the universe. it works in weird ways n ITS OPEN THEORIES FROM HERE SO U CAN THINK WTV U WANT.
#— ✃ waking up to you#— ✃ asks!#rafe#rafe cameron#rafe cameron smut#rafe cameron blurb#rafe cameron imagine#rafe cameron x you#rafe cameron fic#rafe cameron fanfiction#rafe cameron x reader
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i hate ✨the power of friendship✨. i HATE it with my whole soul
and it's one thing this bullshit goes into some project specifically for kids or heavy kid-oriented one, but when something acts all serious and adult-oriented and then does a 180 and suddenly all you just need is to ✨forgive✨ and become ✨friends✨
fuck this shit genuinely
s2e7 will forever have a special place in my heart but i felt the physical need to vomit when silco just appeared behind vander hugged him and smiled something about the power of ✨forgiveness✨ wtf
it took me so long to talk about it despite this bullshit being my №1 disappointment with the whole season after arc 3 aired cause i guess i subconsciously tried to convince myself this scene doesn't actually exist cause it hurts my brain to even think about it and i feel sick already after writing about it for so long
i was already traumatized prior by arc 2 and its stupid flashback of silco potentially being a friends with the mom of the girl he tried to kill numerous times. the only thing that left now is
a) to be glad that stupid letter vander allegedly wrote was just for pushing vi and jinx on the path of becoming sisters again without making them actually try to resolve it among each other
b) the winning of the sparkly power of friendship was in fairytale au universe that existed just for giving timebomb-shippers what we want without trying to work with "our" timebomb situation too much
but in all seriousness, whatever s2 did, however bad the writing was (in my opinion), nothing even remotely as devastating as the stupid power of friendship message. and if this whole thing was actually what they've planned for the story from the start then i'm really sorry for myself that after watching s1 i've decided i found an actual mature project for adult audience
and it's kinda sad, cause all my frustration with this season comes exactly from that place - from me being confident i watch a mature show with mature delivery and themes. if it were any other show, if i expected inconsistencies, stupid plot twists and poorly developed characters then i might even like the season and wouldn't feel the need to hear from other people and discuss what problems exist in it
but… yeah, you just need to forgive, bro, and then literally
#arcane critical#and of course nothing personal if you're adult and you love the power of friendship and enjoyed this theme in arcane as well#to each their own#it's just feels like this show didn't present itself as that kind of show you know#i feel ambushed in the worst way possible#and betrayed#fuck#season 1 my beloved i'll continue to view you as mature project no matter how you was going to turn in the end
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The Great was one of those shows that could have great but in the end resorted to being merely good.
#the great#i said what i said#thinking about the show again#all fans talked about when they talked about the show was the love story#catherine the great- a famous historical figure who famously despised and probably most definitely killed her husband#a cynical tale about people in power who try to change things for the better but when change becomes as a threat to their power they#then revert to crushing it#now reduced to an enemies to lovers au#where her husband in real life was reduced to a footnote. everything she does in the show ends up having peter all over it#i'm not saying i hated the love story- but ahhh after reading a collection of essays on her she had such an interesting tale!#also elizabeth had a WAY more interesting story- she opened the university of moscow and modernized russian roads ffs#as well as outlawed capital punishment#she walked so catherine could run. AND she was empress of russia too#now elizabeth in the show is reduced to a grieving batty mother who works hard to maintain the status quo#none of the other women in the show outside of mariel have any interesting arc either
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Why the fuck are people on Twitter upset about nonbinary robots. Transformers are aliens, why would they follow another species gender binary based on reproduction when they don't even reproduce sexually. If anything, ALL the robots should use they/them.
#liz blogs#transformers#i need to finish earthspark#conservatives won't survive when aliens come to earth#imagine going to another planet and trying to translate pronouns#but either theres more than two or theyre not based on reproduction#how do you figure out if youre a glerp or a blongo or a dee when you dont even have a yundle#and guess what else. if the robots all have one gender. and they use different Earth Pronouns#that dont line up with - in conservative terms - the pronouns they Should have#guess what. all the robots are trans now.#this is probably fucking incoherent i just woke up but man i hate when people think the universe revolves around humans#smash the gender binary to pieces#i write this from an angle to shit on their stupid argument i know nonbinary people can use gendered pronouns as well#the point is its hard to translate. frankly we also deserve big macho bots picking she her because it sounds nice#and little femmebots picking he him because it sounds cool and they want to seem Tough in earth terms#hasbro hire me i love robots and I'll write a transformers show so good it'll make conservatives literally explode
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when the doctor asked emma grayling who clara is and she was like "she's a perfectly ordinary girl shes very clever and she's more scared than she lets on is that not enough" literally me to moffat
#clara oswald#doctor who#the fucking loss i experienced in bells of st john#couldnt even allow her to be good at hacking on her own da spoon men had to boost her iq<3#that was the beginning of the end#she was such an interesting and derranged character she deserved more and by more i mean less#so so much less#she was interesting in her own right she did not need that other shit#like she literally had her own time lord victorious moment she saw the universe from birth to death in hide and it changed her#she kept doing increasingly more reckless shit because she went to space to fill a hole she was not trying or expecting to live that long#and she hates it when the doctor tries to be responsible for her#shes always like i never asked you to protect me!!! which is a wild take she refuses to recognise him as the one who can keep her alive in#environments she has never experienced before#she went with him to have some wacky fun and then she saw horrors beyond comprehension and went oh. ok. i can be god too#she looked at the doctor and went oh it's not that you're special it's that your circumstances give you power. and now i have power too#and i have power over you i can make you do things for me#that shit was so good#and like to be clear im not saying she cant have her whole orphan black thing going on#but like what did it actually do for her as a character? it couldve done a lot but she wasnt the focus of any of it#also p much everyone on this show has sacrificed themselves for the doctor it is not a defining trait#what defines her as a character is not that she was Born To Save The Doctor its that she thinks like this#nobodys ever safe!!!!! ive never asked you for that ever!!!
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me seeing all the reactions to the Loki deleted scene:
#I’m trying so hard not to be a total asshole here but like#I genuinely don’t know what everyone expected#tbh I expected to hate it more#nobody’s listened to me about the coronation scene either#I’m afraid I will indulge in some definite crowing if the reaction to that one is at all similar#marvel cinematic universe#loki#Sylvie#Loki show
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why did my boromir post get notes i'm scared
#my roommate requested Boromir Tags Rant in the replies of that post so i suppose i will put that here#BASICALLY it all boils down (in my brain) to people hating this dude for like. getting mind controlled. like it was NOT HIS FAULT‼️#local man tries to take and use an object that specifically influences people to want to take and use it; mord at 5#like ?????#thats the whole POINT of the ring that's the whole reason FRODO had to carry it. he was one of the few people who was super resistant to th#thrall and influence of it#boromir is Just Some Guy (i mean he's like royalty sorta-kinda or whatever but he's just human he doesnt have any special Ring Resistance)#it's NATURAL that he would be tempted#like we SAW what it did to bilbo. we saw him being possessive of it and using it more than he should etc. but when it's bilbo then#apparently people suddenly gain thinking skills and realize that he was being influenced by an outside force#but when it's boromir suddenly its a moral failing???? america explain#plus also like. he was overcome for all of 2 minutes. and as soon as he realized what happened he CRIED bc he was so disgusted w his action#NOT TO MENTION SACRIFICING HIS LIFE FOR MERRY AND PIPPIN#NOT TO MENTION THAT EVEN WHILE INFLUENCED BY EVIL RING 5000 HE STILL ONLY EVER WANTED TO USE THE POWER FOR THE GOOD OF HIS PEOPLE#NOT TO MENTION [gestures at everything to do with faramir]#like. think for 4 seconds. use your brain. would an evil man cry after realizing he was influenced into doing something bad#would an selfish evil man sacrifice his life to save 2 funny hobbits#anyway i like him#also from like an out-of-universe perspective boromir trying to take the ring shows the power of the ring. it shows that it was able to#overcome even this Good Guy Character. you are not supposed to read/see that scene and take away from it ''boromir is bad''#you are supposed to take away from it ''wow the ring is SO POWERFUL that it could even influence such a good guy as boromir''#THATS MY OPINION ANYWAY#OH ALSO WE SAW FRODO GET INFLUENCED BY IT. ngl i forgot that happened for a minute. but EVEN FRODO caved for a bit#theres a reason why boromir's death is framed as a tragedy. it's not a bad guy getting what he deserved#it's a good man who will be missed and who died too soon#do you Really think aragorn would have kissed his forehead if he was evil. come on.#AND LIKE PIPPIN SWEARING FEALTY TO DENETHOR OVER IT??? that's a whole other can of worms but AUGH. pippin..........#Absolutely Agonizing.#can't be bothered to fix the grammar mistakes in this sowwy#my post
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The thing about the Diamonds in Steven Universe is that they really had the potential to be extremely compelling and interesting villains, and then they just. Weren't.
They had a few episodes where they got to be intimidating and badass genocidal dictators, and then they were just sad but cringy aunts whose genocidal past just. Doesn't matter, I guess?
Don't get me wrong, I'm not even necessarily against a story where there's inflated stakes like "my family is committing genocide" and there being a "redemption" that is less about the actually redeeming the character and more about progressing another character or completing that other character's arc (a la Darth Vader with Luke Skywalker), but like. You have to then try to make the stakes FEEL personal. And the Crewniverse really doesn't do that with the Diamonds.
I don't end up caring that Steven and the Diamonds are technically family because we get 145 episodes of the series where we understand them as genocidal dictators who are bent on destroying the planet, then 5 episodes dealing just with the fact the Steven's mom was actually a Diamond without thinking about the family tree, and THEN we only get 5 episodes acknowledging that, oh yeah, I guess the Diamonds are family too, so we have to help them settle their family issues!
If we take the example of Star Wars, we have a whole movie to reckon with the revelation that Darth Vader is Luke's father, and multiple (sometimes even heart-wrenching) moments with Luke grappling with this, from confronting Obi-Wan's ghost, to confronting Yoda, to even confronting Darth Vader himself. And even when other things are taking the focus, like rescuing Han or taking out Storm Troopers on Endor, it still figures heavily in the background, that Darth Vader is Luke's father, and nothing about this conflict can be the same for him (Luke).
We don't really get a lot of time to think about it with the Diamonds. It's just, "Oh yeah, these people suck," for 99% of the show, then suddenly it switches gears to be like, "no wait, but they're my FAMILY!!!!" and it never really has a chance to breathe or settle with the audience.
And no, this is not something that can be blamed on the show getting cancelled, because the redemption STILL could have had a lot of weight by, you know...letting the Diamonds actually get destroyed in the end! But of course that was never going to happen, so 🤷🏻
#steven universe#i don't even hate steven universe#su#i actually admire it for what it tried to do#and i've often said it's the sort of show i wished i could have had as a kid#but the decision to redeem the diamonds was...a decision#and it ultimately makes them cheap and bad villains who feel more like 'villains of the week' than the actual Endgame Bosses#that they were apparently SUPPOSED to be#i mean that's obviously the least of anyone's concerns#trying to shift from 'genocidal dictators' to 'weird aunts' is extremely fucked up#but then it was always gonna end like this i suppose#it's just hard not to think of all the potential of su and how it was kind of wasted
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I pride myself on having hit the most niche Simpsons gripe of all time which is being the sole “Barthood” hater.
#The episode based on the movie Boyhood#“Hate” is a strong word. I love what they were trying to do with it (10 stars for character design) and it had some nice moments and ideas#However long (very long) story short I feel like the real audience for Barthood is people who are peripherally aware of the show#It leverages the power of the characters as pop cultural symbols to tell a more universal story about growing up not necessarily about Bart#So it’s like an interesting 22-minute short film I just don’t think it’s a good episode of The Simpsons#The Simpsons#Anyway I keep seeing this episode on every top 10 modern episode list and I’m like somebody tell them to watch Bartless instead 🙏
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what do u meannnnnnn i'm abt to be post college graduation 🧍🏻♀️🧍🏻♀️🧍🏻♀️
#apparnelty some family friends coming to my graudation#bc ig i'm the first in the generation to graduate or whatever the fuck#and like whatever that's fine but ffs i wish they would've come to my show instead#that i co directed and literally love sos o so oso sosososoososooo much#so so so proud of that#i don't give a shit abt my graduation tbh lmfao TT#so it lowkey doesn't mean much to me that they want to come to my graduation ;-;#it would've meant so fucking much if i knew they would be able to come#and want to see that and i could like suggest hey instead come see this show LMAO#like it probably wouldn't have happened but whatever#also just like i have like no motivation and no interest in stats at this point lmfao#ALSO bc these ppl all gonna be fucking talking abotu and asking abt what i'm doing after#I DON'T KNOWWWWW what i'm fucking doingggggggg#i alr get enough talk from my mom abt how i'm not applying to enough jobs#i dont need family friends to also be asking me and my answer just being ha idk#i'm fucking staying at college tho like on campus bc i'm a fucking loser and don't want to move on#like not rly. i'm kinda trying to see it as like#the alternative would've been me at home being a loser lol#and that would've been so annoying and even if this isn't the 'right' thing to do or most traditional#at least i'm choosing to do it ig#and i get to stay in this club w my bestestestestest friends for another yr#idc if i'm like not moving on when i should LOL too bad for me that's a future problem#and also kinda figure out this weird right after college time period w my friend who i'm rooming with#ok. slay that was. acool turnaround from me lmfao just . yeah ok that's the positive side ig lmao#anyway i also dont give a shit about graduation bc i hate my university rn lmfao :) and the world is burning down#jeanne talks#i am . procrastinating#imagine knowing what the fuck i learned in this class this whole semester#ugh literally two group projects to end on and two of the most boring annoying group project experiences i've had LMAO
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This is still a Taste of Athens hate blog.
#ted lasso#ted lasso spoilers#this is a taste of athens hate blog#fucking appalling#i hate that restaurant even more now#i hate what it is in universe and i hate what the show is trying to make it represent#we still don't know if they've desegregated their dining room for everyone#i reject it as a symbol of working class authenticity#i am on the side of the shelley family#who patronized this business FOR YEARS but were told to sit in the back#they gave this fucking racist ass olive garden a privileged place in their family life#and the business responded with resentment#and my heart is supposed to be warmed by jade making some grand gesture with baklava#well joke's on you i don't like baklava#easily my least favorite mediterranean dessert#i like flaky pastry as much as i like jade being a pov character this episode#which is to say i don't#i don't know what the narrative equivalent of kazan dibi or kunefe is but it's not that episode
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I’m not the only one who ignores all the movies and shows after Endgame except Black Widow, No Way Home, Multiverse of Madness and Hawkeye, am I?
#it’s not that I don’t like the other movies/shows#it’s just that I don’t like them#it feels like taking away a big part of myself and trying to replace it with half-assed similar parts#for example the Loki series is okay but I can’t stop thinking about how all of his character development was thrown out of the window#because he’s past 2012 Loki and not the Loki I grew to love and relate to#or Guardians of the Galaxy is not a shitty movie and Gamora is not a shitty character but I don’t like her because she’s her past self#and her character development was thrown away as a result of that too#what I’m trying to say is: it feels like a shell of what it used to be and I hate it#marvel#mcu fandom#marvel cinematic universe#loki series#guardians of the galaxy#gotg v3#the avengers#avengers 1#marvel movies
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