#i hate portia so fucking much

[dearreader]

anytime i remember portia from the merchant of venice i get annoyed at the girl in my class who responded to one of discussion questions on why in portia’s introductory scene she’s stereotyping all her suitors ( answer is she’s a bigot) and this one girl responded by saying something “i don’t think we should use a word as strong as stereotyping. though i do think the audience who first saw it sure did get a kick out of these joke! but i think we all should reexamine how we view portia and look at her with more empathy because she has lost a basic right we all have, the choice to decide who we marry” as if she doesn’t choose and manipulate the casket game to marry bassiano but also forced shylock to convert to christianity at the end of the play and taking away his right to choose religion

[mangio-formaggio]

S3 Pen and Portia... boy there's so much to unpack. Like yeah, Portia sucks undoubtedly on so many levels. She overlooks and infantilizes Pen. Her emotional intellect and tact are almost non existent. But also... her pragmatism is so painfully raw. Her marriage sucked so much, she thinks love doesn't exist, even if her nearest neighbors are the bloody fairytale book characters. She didn't love her husband and by the end of their marriage didn't even see reasons to respect him. Every time she is trying to enjoy herself and her daughters's little wins smth bad happens and she has to switch into a survival mode once again. This is the only way of life Portia knows. Prudence and Philipa are so obnoxious, cause she probably spoiled them as little children. Cause it felt like the only time in life when girls can be completely careless and happy. Jfc she has to interfere in every aspect of their lives, including sex, cause they time after time prove to be incompetent. And then there's Pen. Obvious even to Portia, that she's the smartest and naturally with the most common sense. The most quiet and vulnerable one. And I couldn't help but wonder: doesn't Portia see herself in Pen more than in any other daughters? In her eyes if Pen will marry someone it will be for money and security, just like she did once. Love? What love? It doesn't exist for girls like two of them. Prudence and Philipa are dumb enough to buy the illusion, but if smart girls, practical girls forget to be careful they gonna be fooled and hurt, right? But also you marry for security and then your life is depends on someone's whim. Portia has been there, done that. You can't win if you capable to see the world for what it is. And how Pen sees the situation, if she didn't marry someone kind and stable, she's gonna live with Portia for the rest of her days and what's gonna happen to her? She's gonna become Portia. Cynical one, put on a fake smile one. The one, who's always there to solve the problemes of her relatives with less brains, but more full lives. Portia doesn't want her daughters to repeat her life so bad, cause she loves them in her own fucked up way. Pen doesn't want to be Portia so bad, cause she thinks Portia so cold and pragmatic she doesn't even love her. It's just so... ghskdkdkjs... Pen and Portia are more similar than they think, and they both hate to admit that. Cause then it means that Portia is vulnerable and, deep down, is stupidly hopeful, and Pen is capable to be cruel in oder to survive.

[spaceorphan18]

The Lady Whistledown Papers: 1x05 The Duke and I

Welcome back, Gentle Readers, to The Lady Whistledown Papers, where I’m taking an in-depth look at Penelope Featherington and Colin Bridgerton’s character arcs and romance within the show Bridgerton!

For previous issues, follow tag : The Lady Whistledown Papers

It's episode five! Things are getting spicy! ;) While there's not a ton in this episode, there are some BIG developments...

Tomatoes

Alright, so I should mention before we get too into this scene, that it kicks off with mentioning the money issues the Featheringtons are about to have. It's part of the reason Portia is gonna push Marina marrying Colin so hard. Having a wealthy Bridgerton in her pocket kills two birds with one stone.

Alright, so this is day who knows how long of this courtship has been going on, and after the events of last episode, Penelope is no longer thinking this whole thing is cute or tolerable anymore. It's a combination of -- she's fucking with the man I love and the man I love is being fucked with, which are two different things. Yes, she is protective of her feelings and has no desire to watch Colin be with someone else. But she's also very protective of Colin in general - because they do have a relationship. It may not be romantic, but there are mutual feelings of friendship, and she sincerely does not like that Marina is manipulating him.

But of course - the look on her face here is pure jealousy. Because Colin is bringing flowers to Marina every day. And Marina doesn't really care all that much, but oh, how Penelope would love to be courted, love to be romanced, love to have the attention of any one showering her gifts and compliments. But the fact that it's not just some guy that she could live vicariously through Marina with, it's Colin, which makes it intolerable.

Meanwhile, oh Colin, lost in his own fantasies. He loves playing this role of romantic hero. He brings in flowers every time for Marina -- because it's a way to show he cares about her. It's also, probably, proper gentlemanly contact to bring gifts during a courtship. But it's also interesting -- that the whole reason this tomato discourse kicks off is that he wants to surprise her, be unpredictable, make himself stand out when it comes to the courtship.

Also, I'm really entertained by the thought that a bushel of tomatoes would be used as a courtship device. Nothing says romance quite like the tomato. (As much as I'm being cheeky about it, I do love a bit of spontaneity and absurdity in a relationship, so I do approve of Colin's ridiculousness here.)

I LOVE the tomato discourse. I love it.

I love that Penelope can't even help herself by injecting her comments. She is gonna meddle, but it's going to be on a simpler level to start with. Just a throwaway comment that really doesn't raise eyebrows (at first) that Marina doesn't like tomatoes. Which undermines the act that Marina is throwing at Colin (and Pen so notes this -- and, honestly, she's probably a bit amused that Colin picked something that Marina probably does actively hate).

Then, of course, after Marina kind of brushes that comment off, Pen digs in a little more -- suggesting the best place to go get tomatoes is... Greece. (My god, this cracks me up every time -- is Greece known for it's tomatoes??) And I love that she says this with a smile, playing it off as if she were just trying to be helpful. Then she suggests Colin bring her back a bunch (because I'm sure they'd survive the trip) after he gets back from Greece. Oohh, Pen, it's a longshot stall tactic, but if she can just put this courtship on delay...

It's fascinating watching Marina in this moment. She KNOWS that Penelope is up to meddling. She knows that she's intentionally trying to stop things from progressing forward, but the interesting thing is that she doesn't know why Pen is doing it. I mean, I kind of think it's obvious, but Marina, at this point, has begun to trust Penelope as a friend -- so it just comes off as her being super weird.

Colin, meanwhile, is a bit baffled by Penelope. He doesn't really catch on that she's meddling -- thinks, more so, that she's being a little obtuse, and that is not catching on that he'd rather see how things work out with Marina. But...

There are a couple of interesting dynamics going on in this last little bit.

First of all, the comfort in which Pen and Colin speak to each other says a lot. There's no formality between them. They speak with each other at ease, in the way siblings would talk with each other. Colin, no doubt, probably does think of Pen a bit like Eloise in this moment. He even calls her Pen, here, which is kind of unusual when you think about it, because they're at her house and not his. And the way he kind of dismissively states he's unsure of his travel plans -- it's said, almost irritatingly, in the way you'd want to tell your younger sibling to bugger off, I'm trying to hook up with this girl...

When Pen brings up his travel plans, she mentions that he's always been interested in travel. And while this is a calculated thought - a way to re-inspire desires that he has probably for sure talked about at great length when she's been over to visit Eloise -- I think there's some sincerity here, too. I think she can recognize a desire to go out and see the world, and the idea of him closing the door on that opportunity -- especially for Marina, who is manipulating a relationship with him, and will saddle him with fatherhood at such a young age really does get to her.

Which is why it's more complex than -- I have a crush on a boy, if I get him out of the country, he won't hook up with the pregnant lady and be stuck with her.

Colin then has a line that REALLY sticks out to me. :: 'Were I to go, there are things in London I'd miss more than seeing the world.'

This line hits a little harder when you sit down and think about it. I don't doubt that Colin has an adventurous spirit -- more so than either of his older brothers. But I think also, unlike them (well, Benedict is going to go about it another way) Colin is searching for something. He isn't sure what, but travel seems to be an opportunity to find out.

Marina is a purpose. She's a reason to stay. She's a reason to do the things that his heart really desires to do. She's a person to protect. A person to start a family with. A person whom he does want to figure out his sexual desires with. A person who will let him satisfy the role he thinks he's supposed to have in society. And if that person is right there - then why travel in the first place? He doesn't need to search for something that is right there.

The fascinating thing is that it is better for Colin that he does end up going. He kind of needs those experiences to gain new outlooks on life, to clear his head, to be at peace with himself, and to understand what really missing something when he's away is. And, of course, because he'll find that he'll get to fall in love in a deeper way while he's gone (of course - through his correspondence with Penelope).

And, of course, i can't help but go back to thoughts on The Odyssey -- which is one of the myths embedded in Pen and Colin's story -- the story of a world weary soldier just trying to get back home to his wife... Penelope.

Colin thinks he understands what he's saying when he says that line. But he doesn't truly get. And won't ever if he choses a path with Marina - one that is doomed to be a (possibly) unfulfilled life.

It's always so funny to me when TV characters have private conversations literally two feet away from people who shouldn't hear it, lol.

Pen is probably well aware that the childish meddling she's doing isn't really working, so she goes to appeal to her mother. She points out that Colin is young, yes, but she tries to appeal to her mother's sense of logic. She points out that there may not be enough time to get them married since Colin is young and may not be ready for marriage. Portia considers, but does have her own plans...

Ug, poor Pen, the pining does get me. It'll be alright, girl...

A Plan...

If there's one thing you can say about Marina, it's that she knows how to play this game, and how to do it well so that she can get what she needs. Is it manipulation? Yes. Is she doing it out of self preservation? Absolutely.

She completely plays Portia here (Portia, isn't necessarily stupid, either, but is trying to be calculating in her own right). Marina appeals to Portia's sense of status -- and her desire and need to maintain that status. So Marina basically cuts her a deal. Let me go after Colin, and I'll repay you by letting you stay in your good standing with the Ton. And so the two of them forge an alliance.

But, ah, all this talk of seduction and manipulation -- that's breaking Penelope's heart as she hears it. It's bad enough that the guy she loves is interested in someone else. She has always known or felt that she'd lose Colin some day to another woman. But to lose him to people who do not have his best interest at heart? It's devastating.

But still... she does not go first to her best line of defense, Lady Whistledown... that's the last possible card she'll play.

A Wedding

This is, like, the saddest wedding ever. Man, they look miserable.

Colin seems fine about it. He smiles a bit because it's Daphne, and she's getting married. But not a whole lot of insight to pull out here. He's so detached from this plot line, lol.

A Proposal

So, right before we jump into the Pen and Marina stuff, Cressida approaches Daphne and basically says -- I hope some day you'll pay me to keep quit about the shit I saw in the garden. Like, the girl had a blackmailing mindset even here. I mean, obviously Season 3 didn't come out of nowhere, but it is interesting the seeds they did place for things so early on.

Anyway... Penelope's back to her meddling -- this time trying to get Marina interested in ANYONE else. And I mean, Pen's got a good eye. She's watched all of these people, and I trust that she's attempting to set Marina up with a good (enough) match.

After Marina becomes stubborn about Colin, Penelope opens up. While she's not entirely truthful, she is very open and does lay a lot of it on the line. She admits she does care for Colin. She admits that she just cannot stand back and watch him be manipulated into a life that he didn't sign up for. While she is holding back on the extent of her romantic feelings, she is being emotionally vulnerable, in a way to get Marina to empathize with her. I mean, she is being sincere, and cutting a lot of the mind games crap she had been doing. But she's hoping that a more open approach will help change Marina's mind.

Of course - Marina is out to win. She sees no other options, and she does throw some of it back in Penelope's face. She knows that Colin is a sure thing, and that she'll be treated right. She is not going to lose that chance - because the alternative are the Rutledges of the world. And she just can't take that chance.

It's kind of funny that she still doesn't get how invested Penelope is in this, but she is giving Pen her own moment of emotional vulnerability. She is running out of time, and she will do what she can to secure a good future for herself, and however Penelope feels about it, doesn't really matter because it's ultimately not about her. (And, you know, she isn't wrong, even though we may side with Pen on this one.)

We also learn that Rudledge is engaged and off the market (darn) so Portia tells Marina she'd better get working on Colin... there is a time limit after all.

Before we get to Colin though... we have this brief moment between Pen and Eloise. They've had their fight, and now it's awkward. Neither really quite knowing what to say. But it'll be alright... They always find their way back to each other. But no time for that now! Other plotlines to get to! lol

Poor Pen, no where to hide in this brightly lit, very white room. She can't hide from Eloise. And she can't hide from Marina and Colin. It's just a lot... Just a lot to witness, and she can't do anything about it.

Not at the moment anyway...

The reason the earlier episodes showed Pen and Marina getting along well is to establish the respect Pen has for Marina and vice versa. But this is the turning point. Because Pen had tried to be open about her feelings and Marina was just not playing that game.

Oh, there is some anger in Penelope's eyes. You do not fuck with Colin. You just don't. Penelope would help her with any, every other man in all of England. Just not hers. Pen could accept if Marina truly loved Colin, she probably would let him go.

But the 'act' is going into full swing now, and Pen just cannot with it. She just cannot with how Marina is going to completely manipulate the situation. And even though Pen doesn't get to see what we're about to -- she knows what's happening. Unfortunately, poor Colin can't.

So, what is the FIRST thing Marina do? She needs to get them alone, so she pretends she's not feeling well. And I mean, she gets him. She so gets him. His protector/hero complex is activated and he quickly is not only concerned, but gets her out of there.

And oofff, this next scene is almost hard to watch, because every beat of it on Marina's end is calculated. It's masterful really.

Oh, poor Pen, having a moment for herself of sadness.

But I also just thought of something... had Marina chosen anyone else, she could have really helped Marina. The Lady Whistledown of it all could have helped her. Penelope watches everything, she knows things, and she could have helped Marina in snagging any other man at that party. Of course, she was never going to give up her identity, but it's kind of interesting to think of the what ifs...

Oh man, Marina's smug look when they enter the study. She isn't even trying to hide it.

Colin. You are such a dumbass. (Said with all the love, cause I do love his dumb ass.)

It's funny, Colin is such an interesting study because he's got such a duality about him. Social decorum is something he thinks about (and will very much so in this scene), but he also isn't really one to play by the rules.

In this instance, though, it's his youthful inexperience and naivety that is his down fall. Does he want to be alone with Marina? Yes. But does he sense that she's setting this up so they can be alone? Not even in the slightest. He's still in protector mode. Even the scandalous shutting of the door is about her comfort, not about what she's trying to get.

He may be a little slower, but he's not a complete idiot, and when he takes a moment to asses that she's fine, he gets it. And the wheels start turning. And yeah, he does want to hook up with her. His little grin at his fortune says that.

Marina, however, just has zero time for the drawn out romance Colin has playing in his head. She is direct and gets right to the point. And I love that there's a little moment of freak out that crosses his face. Sure, he wants to hook up -- but he clearly never has before, because the minute she moves forward he does have a sheer moment of panic before he regains himself. He wants her. But he has no idea what he's doing.

And then we get this. This almost kiss. And there's just... a lot to this little moment. A lot.

Because I think it speaks to Colin's fantastical idea of what romance is vs the reality of it when it's staring him in his face.

I do think, yes, base line, he wants to kiss her -- among other things. And I do kind of wonder if he even has kissed anyone at this point, because he's kind of acting as if he's in this place where it just feels... not right. And, not even coming from the societal pressure (which I'll get to in a second) but from a place where -- he has all of these romantic little fantasy of what this moment should be like, and having a rushed moment in the study the way Anthony probably would do it, is not really Colin. Or.. this youthful version of Colin who doesn't have the experience.

I have to wonder if this younger Colin has all these fantasies about kissing his wife for the first time at their wedding and the magical moments he know does happen afterwards. And I think that's why I do think it's a good thing all of this happens because it does end up smashing his idyllic version of romance to allow him to be open to what real romance is -- not the ideas he's made up in his head, but what is really there.

(And I mean, I guess I'll get into it maybe later? I do have headcanons for Colin -- such as his first time with a woman was probably bought and paid for at a brothel. That after this whole Marina thing kind of sours him on love for a while, it pushes him to go out and get some experiences. It allows him to understand the world a bit better - so when he finally does see Penelope, he'll understand it better.)

So he stops the kiss. And Marina, who is savvy as fuck for navigating all of this so quickly, doesn't push him. She's gonna seduce him, but she'll do so on his terms. And appealing to his greater sense of romanticism and honor. Which really works in her favor, ultimately.

Colin can barely believe he's stopping - because he probably is a bit overwhelmed by whatever body reaction is probably happening in that moment. He still considers himself a gentleman who does things in a proper order.

And it's funny, as much as he ends up being a bit of a rule breaker, it's almost not intentionally. He wants to always be doing the right thing. He wants that honor. He wants to be the gentleman. He wants to be seen in good standing by the greater society. So he won't do anything to compromise himself, but more so her. And so he holds back because this is not the proper way. So, yes, I do think some of society's pressure is on display here, too.

Oh, but Marina, girl is so calculated in this scene. She plays on his gentlemanly nature. Plays on his need for honor. And pushes hard on his desire. You almost feel bad for how easily Colin cracks. He is very much a 'my wife' guy. Even here with Marina, that tendency is here on display.

The jump to marriage is bonkers quick. Yes -- it is partially fueled by society's restraints on sexual desires. But it's also a romantic fantasy Colin actually wants. He wants a wife. He wants that life. He's just never found that emotional connection to really fuel him to go for it. But he thinks he has that with Marina. He thinks that she wants that life with him, too. And, of course, now that they've been alone and courting, he thinks it is the proper step to take. So he does.

It's sweetly in earnest. And a bit unsure of a proposal. He doesn't doubt his own feelings, but he doesn't know where Marina stands.

When Marina not only says yes but looks ecstatic about the idea, he just lights up. Romantic achievement fulfilled. That almost kiss did make him unsure of things. But now that marriage is on the table. Now that they can have this nice long engagement and a fancy wedding and this idyllic life of love he's always heard about from his mother, he is so, so excited about it. He thinks he's getting everything he's ever wanted.

And... he thinks he's giving her everything she wants. He talks about her deserving a grand wedding. He is (almost hilariously) breathless when he says it'll be wonderful. (There is really a little ten yo girl living Colin's heart, lol)

Unfortunately, Marina's excitement is not for the same reason as his own. She's thrilled that this whole plan has worked as quickly and as swimmingly as she wanted to. And... she didn't even have to sleep with him to get a proposal. Win-win, really.

Oh, Colin... he feels everything so intensely. It's a shame this is a mix of lust and youthful ignorance fueling romantic fantasies that this proposal comes about. And Marina was hoping for all of that. He promises that he'll give her everything she wants, and he does in this moment. It's a shame that what Colin doesn't realize -- it is just a fantasy, and ultimately, not what he wants.

Oh man, that look Marina gives before she turns around. Diabolical. I don't think of her as a villain. I really don't. I think she's a young woman who is desperate and willing to do what she can to ensure her own safety. But she is playing with his heart, and knows it.

Look how giddy he is, oh Colin... Well, they promise not to say anything -- because seriously, probably not a good thing to announce your engagement at your sister's wedding. But Colin's probably going to be sleeping well tonight.

It's interesting -- thinking about how Penelope is currently a little heartbroken while all of this is going on. But, you know, she's had a long time to have to deal with these problems, with the emotions. She is able to handle a lot of these harder emotions and process them better because they've been going on for so long.

I think when the shit hits the fan with Marina, it's going to hurt so much worse in some ways. It's like the opposite of the she fell first, he fell harder trope. He's never had to experience heartbreak on this level before, and it'll feel devastating. It's no wonder he spends all of season 2 spiraling. Huh.

Anyway, on that happy note, we get to move onto episode 6! Which is my favorite Polin episode for Season 1 :)

[As an aside, this episode ends with Daphne and Simon's first time, which -- has a lot of similarities, beats, and dialogue as the Polin mirror scene. But the atmosphere, tone, and even acting are a lot different. Idk - I find it really fascinating. If anyone else does, let me know, and I can do a side by side analysis of it, cause there are some interesting things to dissect there.]

[zumiiisumsum]

I may have to need a lot of time to process a lot of things about part 2 but I will say brief initial thoughts.

1. Shonda Rhimes, you’re such a fucking liar I swear to GOD! I will NEVER EVER trust anything you say ever again.

2. RIP Colin “My Wife” Bridgerton. They really gave away your spotlight to Benedict I can’t believe it lmao

3. I can’t believe they made me dislike Colin so much the last two episodes. He’s such a fucking baby post-lady whistledown like why is he REFUSING to just talk it out with her? Why is he REFUSING to love his hot fucking wife like that and sleep on the couch like a fucking man child?? WHERE WAS MY BOY IN PART 1???? HE WAS SUPPOSED TO BE MORE MATURE THIS SEASON WHAT THE FUCK DID YALL DO TO HIM???

4. Show not tell. SHOW NOT TELL. SHOW. NOT. TELL!!!!

5. On a brighter note, I love everything portia and featherington.

5. Editing was SHIT. I also beg yall to NEVER EVER let Tom Verica direct again. Ep 7 and 8 was all over the fucking place.

6. I love michaela sterling. Hated the threesome scenes with my very being and not because I dislike Bisexual Benedict but it just serves no purpose whatsoever, not even to Benedict’s character.

7. There was no “I love you with everything I amz

Colin Bridgerton, I am so sorry they had to write you that way ☠️ They rushed you so bad and all the other plots got what shouldve been your screen time for a well developed character development but alas….you got Jess Brownell to write you ☠️.

Im just disappointed and mad and heartbroken. I really was rooting for this season. I was happy like 24 hours ago…I loved episodes 1-6 I really do…I just don’t understand why they couldn’t just….dedicate a lot of the episodes to Colin’s characterization. I don’t understand why they couldn’t focus on developing him knowing full well he gets a lot of hate in the fandom already. They barely scratched the surface of his insecurities and he didn’t even get enough orgasms ☠️☠️. What are we even doing here. I can’t cope…

[the-razzdazzler]

Atlas Tera and his relationship to each of The Arcana's cast

figured i should do this at some point lol

gonna reblog it to @alchemist-atlas to give any RPers a general idea of who they're interacting with and how they know each other <3 (i am only listing characters that Atlas knows and/or knows of)

MAIN SIX

Asra- Atlas' oldest friend. They lived together for 8 years, but it feels like less time to Atlas because Asra was gone a lot.

Nadia- Atlas does not like or trust her. He knows she came looking for Asra instead on the night he got hired to the palace and it's a bit of a sore spot for him. They do not understand her social cues and will never get why she thought it was a good idea to make him court magician.

Julian- They've interacted a few times, mostly awkward moments back when Julian was... visiting... Asra regularly. Atlas sees him at the Rowdy Raven alot and wants to be better friends but never seems to work up the nerve to talk to him.

Muriel- Lowkey kinda hates Atlas, but the poor guy is oblivious. It's cause Muriel is extremely suspicious of Atlas' shapeshifting since his main other form is a fox and those don't mix well with chickens.

Portia- Atlas is eternally grateful for her. They're not super close, but she helped him out so much when he was first getting settled in the palace.

Lucio- They've never met but Atlas fucking hates him. He survived and lived through the Red Plague and that turned him a little sour to the ruling class as a whole. Lucio was the easiest to blame and he did exactly that, both during and after the Plague. They have somewhat similar personalities though, and might have been friends in another universe.

COURTIERS

Valerius- The love of his life. He would kill or die for this man. Okay sure Val hated him at first but it was a completely one-sided rivalry that was gradually replaced with affection and admiration after a lot of time they had to spend together.

Vlastomil- They infodump to each other about their respective bug special interests. Vlastomil's being worms, Atlas' being moths. They go looking for worms together when it rains and neither one will ever shut the fuck up about bugs.

Vulgora- High-energy besties. Make extremely stupid jokes together and generally annoy everyone around them. Vulgora's always trying to get Atlas to show off any of its magic, the more destructive the better.

Volta- Atlas is ridiculously protective of her. Would probably maim anyone who says anything mean to Volta. They crochet together and Atlas always bakes her cookies or makes her soup or whatever else.

Valdemar- Did Atlas' top surgery when he was around 16. Atlas has a ton of respect for them and considers them close despite barely talking to each other. The time they spend together is like, parallel play except one is doing dissections and the other is brewing potions in a cauldron.

SATRINAVAS

Namar- Met once at a dinner party, only talked for a moment because Valerius was talking to him first. Atlas likes him but has nothing to talk to him about.

Nazali- Atlas vaguely knows them through being mentioned by Julian in the few times they've spoken. Probably would have done Atlas' top surgery but was not in the area at the time and Atlas needed those things gone PRONTO.

Navra- They don't meet often but when they do they're insufferable together. Two rays of sunshine causing so much annoyance and chaos.

ANIMALS

Faust- Atlas can't not love Asra's familiar. Faust's sneater (snake sweater) collection is stupidly massive now thanks to Atlas' crochet ones piling onto Asra's knitted ones.

Malak- Gets fed by Atlas often, who has no idea this is Julian's familiar. Atlas likes him but rarely takes his crow form around Malak simply because the bird is insufferable to have to listen to when you understand what he's saying (see Portia's route).

Mercedes and Melchior- Atlas likes to say he stole them from Lucio (already dead when Atlas met them). It always has treats for them. Atlas loves these dogs with all his heart.

Shriek- Atlas' familiar, a Death's Head Hawk Moth. Was part of a generation of caterpillars he was raising and outlived the rest, then became able to communicate with Atlas.

OTHER (side characters and other MCs)

Selasi- Basically Atlas' adoptive father. They don't meet as much as they used to, but they're still very close and will tell the other everything.

Mazelinka- They'd meet later on, most likely after Atlas opens his own potion shop. They'd probably have so many long conversations about kitchen magic. <3

Castor (a friend's MC)- They're close good friends (insert that one vine) with Atlas. Hates their friend's choice of partner and terrorizes Valerius every chance they get, but that doesn't put any sort of damper on his and Atlas' friendship.

BTW if we're friends and you want to be added to the list of MCs Atlas knows, just let me know :)

(this is a repost cause the first one posted strangely and isn't showing up on my dash or any searches)

[devastatinglygreen]

I love Polly Walker’s portrayal of Portia but i agree. I think so many of these show characters struggle from wanting to address and keep aspects of their book characteristics and then have them make decisions that differ from those for the *drama* or just take other book characters personalities and give them to other show characters omg who said that??

I know Jess B has gotten a lot of hate for changes to s3 (personally her changes at least made sense to me, unlike 90% of what CVD did) so it’s not like I’m looking to add to it. But I do worry about the “consequences” of Whistledown needing to continue following Penelope after her season. If that’s their only way of keeping Nicola on the show and Pen relevant to the plot then I guess? It just feels like continued shaming of Pen for their girlboss-ified LW.

God if I have to watch Pen still be shunned by the Ton can I at least see her and Colin fuck nasty??? Like god where is the hungry boi?? LET HIM EAT (Pen’s) CAKE

polly walker is amazing tbh. like, she just works with whatever they give her, i love her portrayal as portia. yeah, they needed to decide who they wanted these people to be before they just started handing out book personalities when it was going to directly conflict with the show's version of them. a little forethought, if you will.

tbf to jess, she still had to work with what cvd (when i catch you, cvd) left behind for polin. it's a big ask. doing the pen/eloise fight when it doesn't even exist in the books is wild, it's 100% for drama and needed to be handled in s3 so she had that to deal with as well. they did change eloise in s1-2 quite a bit to become the mouthpiece for the modern woman (which is wild bc her brand of feminism comes off so performative--which is probably how a man would write eloise being feminist but that's a whole other issue).

i think LW is more for the audience than anything else at this point. they're used to her narrating and it's good to move the plot forward at times but it's also a huge part of penelope's character so i can see why they kept it. both of them publishing books is great but also they're going to bring in the drama so LW is a very easy way to do that for future subplots.

also yes, 100% it's a fine way to shame penelope for gossip, ha. like girlie printed what she heard--the gossips were already talking she just made cash from it. if she were a dude they'd call it hustling.

sort of hilariously tragic that the audience who hates pen goes online to talk shit with no self-awareness that they're also feeding into the machine they're criticizing on a romance drama show, ha. only then they make it about real people so pretty sure that's worse. but do not tell them, they do not like that.

the man just wants his wife's titties served up like a brunch special okay is that too much to ask?🙏

[bisexualfemalemess]

BRIDGERTON SEASON THREE PART TWO SPOILERS

I’m actually not ready for this because it’s the last episode of the season and still so angsty but of course it has to be.

Already can’t do this. WHAT DO YOU MEAN THE OPENING SHOT IS COLIN BROODING ON THE SOFA WHILE DRINKING HIS TEA FUCK OFF???? 😭😭😭 Communicate please??? Or at least look at her, colin. I actually can’t handle this. WORST MINUTE OF MY FUCKING LIFE, NOW HE’S FUCKING OFF TO BRIDGERTON HOUSE BECAUSE HE WISHES TO LEAVE????? MAKE UP OR I WILL KILL MYSELF!!!

Fuck off, cressida, not her knowing about lw and black-mailing her??? So much for her redemption arc. Not her telling portia??? Like that’s not your place???? Someone needs to give our baby a break. Aww, portia’s character arc is actually so important to me like not her thinking penelope just always left because her social battery died and she just let her be, that’s actually so cute. I swear if portia turns on her now too i’ll kill myself again, at least we got peneloise back though so maybe i won’t actually. WHY ARE PEOPLE SO PETTY TOWARDS HER ONCE THEY FIND OUT ABOUT WHISTLEDOWN??? LIKE THAT IS STILL THE SAME GIRL YOU KNEW MINUTES BEFOREHAND YOU JUST KNOW MORE ABOUT HER NOW???? At least penelope immediately tells colin this time so he cannot be petty about it.

DOES DANBURY KNOW??? Is this how we get agatha x penelope friendship next season??? Agatha bridgerton coming home????

Ooh a finch x dankworth ball??? Interesting. Oh? Francesca and john moving to scotland?

STOP BROODING COLIN AND TALK TO YOUR WIFE JFC! I love how eloise isn’t choosing sides, our baby girl has truly grown. AH! ELOISE SO TRUE “do not let your marriage be the scar.” Queen behavior, peneloise and polin soulmate-ism. Aww Poor baby pen sounds so tired of all the shit that’s happening to her. I love how they’re trying to figure out how to get penelope out of this situation and i love how colin ‘my wife’ bridgerton made an appearance even though he’s angry with her, 🗣️ He will not stand for anyone blackmailing his wife 🗣️ they’re all so shocked that baby girl’s filthy rich. ALSO LET HER FUCKING SPEAK. this is her mess, she was not looking for help just support and all of a sudden her opinions don’t matter anymore :( Y’all need to let go of your anger towards lw and try to support pen instead of trying to fight her battles for her. She’s just standing in the corner watching as they’re talking about her and what to do :( at least involve her, don’t ignore her and cut her off. Jesusss.

And Benedict’s having a threesome again, interesting but unnecessary.

Protective Colin bridgerton but he’s still angry with her :( “to hear word from home. From penelope, in fact.” STFUUUU STFUUU STFUUU JUST MAKE UP ALREADY WE DON’T NEED ALL THIS YEARNING AND ANGST AND PINING WE GOT ENOUGH OF IT IN PART ONE :((( Aside from that I’m actually so fucking happy that he essentially just called penelope his home, I’m actually gonna combust. I hate how he’s still trying to separate penelope from whistledown “penelope’s no villain” and then he goes on to say that he gets her hate for whistledown???? Did we not just learn that they were the same person, colin? CRESSIDA I STILL FEEL INDIFFERENT TOWARDS YOU BUT BLESS YOU FOR CLOCKING HIS TEA!!!!! “You do not sound as if you hate whistledown. You sound as if you are jealous of her.” PREACH IT! He shut that shit down to fast, like the moment he’s gonna admit that to himself he’s gonna be able to forgive her. THAT FUCK ASS WIG I HATE IT SO MUCH. PLEASE THE RESHOOT WIG MAKES HIM LOOK LIKE A KEN DOLL LIKE ITS SO PLASTIC 😭😭😭😭

PENELOISE SCENE I LOVE THAT THEY’RE BACK. “tell me what you are reading?”With eloise grabbing her hand? 🥹🥹🥹🥹🥹 WAR IS SO TRULY OVER. Colin literally fucked up so bad, not cressida asking for double 🙄🙄🙄 Also penelope’s dress in this scene is so gorgeous. Aww, he’s willing to lie to Benedict for his wife so that the cressida drama can stop. PLEASE JUST MAKE UP YOU IDIOTS. Awwww eloise grabbing her hand in support. I just know peneloise and polin will mirror the christina x meredith x derek dynamic from grey’s with Eloise just bursting into their home unannounced and colin will understand but still be so tired of it.

STOP CUTTING TO BENEDICT THREESOMES THEY HAVE NOTHING TO ADD TO THE STORY IN THIS EPISODE 😭😭😭😭😭

Honestly the lady danbury and violet friendship is so special to me like violet did not care that she was running around with her dad and Agatha loves her more than her brother, that’s so cute.

STOP IT RIGHT NOW THE POLIN SCENE LIKE HE WANTED HER AND HE LOVES HER BUT HE CANT BE WITH HER UNTIL EVERYTHINGS FULLY OKAY BETWEEN THEN BECAUSE HE’S A DEMI SEXUAL KING. THEY NEED TO MAKE UP SO BAD SO THAT THEY CAN MAKE UP FOR THEIR WEDDING NIGHT.

STOP IT HE LOOKS SO DISTRAUGHT SLEEPING ON THE COUCH AND PENELOPE FIDDLING AROUND WITH HER BRACELET AS SHE SAYS SHES GONNA SPARE HIM THE CONFIDES OF A SHARED CARRIAGE ACTUALLY SHUT UO THE ANGST IS TOO MUCH :(

AWW PENELOPE’S LETTERS MADE A COMEBACK. THE FACT THAT HE KEPT ALL OF HER LETTERS WHERE IS MY COLIN BRIDGERTON????

PENELOPE MY QUEEN GETTING TO SEE SOME OF HER MOMS WORST SIDES AND POPPING OFF ON HER. Mother-daughter bitch off! “Oh and from whom?” Well, her family actually. Portia crediting penelope and apologizing for overlooking her, the development is so cute. “We must do better.” So true actually and the fact that it’s coming from portia just shows her development.

Francesca’s wedding was actually so beautiful and her heart to heart with violet beforehand was so cute. Polin sharing a look during francesca’s and john’s wedding and penelope subtly touching him with her shoulder, i’m gonna throw up. STOP THE ANGST.

the bridgerton siblings being chaotic and teasing each other is something so dear to my heart actually.

Penelope’s outfits this episode are all actually so gorgeous, she looks so ethereal in this season in general but especially in this episode. No not her seeing a genuine smile on colin’s face during their wedding party and her smile slowly fading. The angst is angsting.

Aww penelope loves his family so much. The study scene is actually so… “then how am i meant to help you?” “By loving me!” Pop off, pen. Might need to bash his head into a wall a couple times though because our baby boy is very stubborn right now. Like it’s so special to me, her speech is sooo dear to my heart. HANDS, HANDS, HANDS! 🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺

Oh? Penelope writing to the queen AND Violet? What is going to happen?

Lmaooo Benedict got one taste of men and he could not stop. I’m actually crying, my favorite pansexual, (i love you but please stop taking screen-time from polin during their own damn season the irony of people complaining polin got too much screen time last season and now during their own season they barely get as much scenes as the previous leads) IM CRYING BENEDICT DOES NOT GIVE A FUCK ABOUT THAT WOMAN LMAOOO.

Aww a benedict and eloise swing scene, so on brand. Real el back not giving a fuck about fitting in anymore because she got pen back. ELOISE IS A LESBIAN I CANNOT STRESS THIS ENOUGH AND I WISH BENEDICT SHARED WHAT HE FOUND OUT WITH ELOISE SO THAT SHE WOULD KNOW THAT IT’S OKAY 😭😭😭

Penelope’s ball dress looks so gorgeous. AWW SHE PAID FOR THE BALL 😭😭😭😭 SHE’S SUCH AN AMAZING SISTER DESPITE ALL THE SHIT THEY’VE SAID AND DONE TO HER OVER THE YEARS. Not my poor baby standing on the sidelines again 😭😭😭 Where’s colin when you need him???

Oh, the queen showed up. SHE’S PISSED???? PENELOPE WHAT HAVE YOU DONE??? AWWW. Penelope revealing herself to the ton, girl boss. Her entire speech is her admitting her flaws and defending herself in the same breath. She’s one of the best, if not, the best written character on the show and it is about time the haters realize that. The fact that she keeps eye contact with El and Colin while defending herself but also assuring them about their own insecurities while doing so 😭😭😭 I’m crying, Colin actually smiled at her, he looks so proud of his wife 😭😭😭 Stfuuuu. Are we getting that make-up? PENELOPE MY QUEEN INTO THE LIGHT INDEED! AWW THE QUEEN ACTUALLY PARDONED HER OH MY GOD.

The ton needs to stop whispering if you have anything to say, say it to her face, The Featheringtons showing support and phillipa demanding that varley releases the bugs to save her sister from embarrassment 😭😭😭

Colin i’m so serious when i say go to your wife and ask her to dance. AWW THE DANBURY-PENELOPE SCENE. I have hopes for a friendship in season 4. She knew all along and kept the secret 🥹🥹🥹 “who loves the Bridgertons more than I” Especially her soulmates colin and eloise 🥺🥺🥺🥺 Aww penelope and her mother are actually so important to me “my girl” OH MY GOD THAT SCENE FROM THE TRAILER WHERE SHE LOOKS SO FONDLY AT SOMEONE AND THEN TURNS TO SEE COLIN WAS WITH PORTIA. SHUT UP THATS SO CUTE.

She looks so worried, please make-up i swear to god. “That i would not object to an annulment if you requested one.” COLIN WE HAVE 14 MINUTES LEFT IF YOU DO NOT SHUT THAT SHIT DOWN AFTER EVERYTHING SHE’S DONE TO SHOW YOU SHE CARES I AM PERSONALLY GONNA BASH YOUR HEAD INTO A WALL REPEATEDLY.

Oh never mind, the shock on his face, like that was never even a thought to him. He was always gonna stay married to her. FINALLY “you are her.” It took him a while to get there but he finally accepted that part of her and it’s so cute. His speech is actually so…he’s such a healthy male character, the only man ever actually, like you will not be able to find a man that is so in touch with their feelings that he can admit he was jealous and that you’re actually a braver, better person than he is. COLIN BRIDGERTON THE MAN THAT YOU ARE🗣️🗣️🗣️🗣️ this speech is so dear to me.

STFUU THE PARALLEL TO EPISODE ONE

Episode 1: “Goodbye, Mr.Bridgerton”

“Pen, i….”

Episode 8:

“You are a very good man, mr. Bridgerton.”

“Now, will you please do me the honor of joining me on the dance floor, Mrs. Bridgerton.”

STFUUU HE ACTUALLY CALLED HER MRS BRIDGERTON THAT IS A WIN FOR ME. Them dancing together will always have a special place in my heart, especially since everything’s resolved and they’re all giggly.

Oh, Eloise moving to scotland with francesca, oh my god. OH??? Francesca bridgerton, i know what you are and Michaela stirling i did not realize your game. Welcome to the sapphic club, fran.

OH????? Penelope riding colin!!!! Yay! I wish they kept in the longer version of the scene since this was apparently originally part of a montage but i’m so glad they finally got their shit together and consummated their marriage. Penelope loves colin’s chest hair so much.

OOOOH? Masquerade ball. Ben’s season next?

Pen’s and eloise goodbye hug was so long actually, they’re the cutest. Penelope’s little wave to her, my peneloise heart 🥹🥹🥹

“Goodbye.” SHUT UP

Oh my gosh, the epilogue. Polin had the heir so fucking cute. THEIR MARITAL BLISS IN THE EPILOGUE THEY’RE SO SICKENING ACTUALLY. Aww phillipa wants her daughter to be a writer so cute. POLIN WRITER COUPLE AND PENELOPE SUPPORTING HER HUSBAND IN WRITING AND PUBLISHING SO TRUE . NO STOP THE TRANSITION FROM JULIE ANDREWS TO PENELOPE’S VOICE WAS ACTUALLY GENIUS I’M GONNA THROW UP.

ALSO THE SYMBOLISM OF PENELOPE AND COLIN HAVING THEIR FINAL KISS BASKED IN SUNLIGHT IN FRONT OF THE WINDOW WHERE SHE USED TO SPENT HOURS TRYING TO SPY INTO HIS ROOM IM GONNA CHAIN MYSELF TO A TRAIN TRACK ACTUALLY.

Yours truly, Penelope Bridgerton

That’s it, i’m checking myself into a mental hospital now. What the actual fuck.

Wow. Awww guys all i want is playing during the credits that’s so cute 🥰

I actually don’t know what to do with myself for another two years until we learn what these characters are up to again. Like this season was actually so special to me i am dying for more especially more polin since they cut that short for some benedict awakenings and setting up for his season but i am glad for the bits that we did get.

Overall i do not have too much criticism for this season so i give it a solid 9.5/10

[strangedreamings]

S3E1 (spoilers abound)

Already saw the first 5 minutes on Tudum. I'm firmly in the "Colin didn't see Penelope when he arrived, he was too busy looking at her house" camp. It's sweet that Pen as LW singles out the new debutantes and tries to prop them up.

I love that one of the debutantes is deaf, more diversity on this show is a good thing.

Ah, Francesca's been in Bath since the beginning of S2, thank you, Violet.

"If I can be at ease in the chaos of our home, surely I shall find my way in the Season." Truer words never spoken, Frannie.

Francesca's not the Diamond? WTAF?

Those fucking sheer gloves. I hate them SO MUCH. Long gloves were for modesty, making them sheer makes them pointless. Somebody fetch me the costume designer, I just want to talk.

So Eloise is already "friends" with Cressida and it looks like she is trying to protect Pen from her. We'll see how long this lasts.

Can we nominate Jessica Madsen now for the Emmy for Best Supporting Actress in a Drama Series? I always hate Cressida but if, as rumored, we're going to sympathize with her this season, then I'm sure Jessica will knock it out of the park.

I love that Violet and Kate are getting along so well. I'm also thrilled that Violet doesn't approve of Eloise being friends with Cressida.

"I will move into a dower house as soon as I find one." Oookay, 15 minutes into the first episode and we have our first error. Dower houses aren't something a dowager FINDS, it's a (relatively) smaller house on an estate that the family already HAS. What Violet is looking for is a TOWN house in London since the Bridgertons should already have a DOWER house at Aubrey Hall!

Shonda, please, hire me as a script doctor. I assure you I'm affordable.

Lady Danbury: "Lady Bridgerton." Violet and Kate: "Yes?" I love that and I'm sure Agatha did it deliberately, it's cute.

Colin, dearheart, what in the actual fuck are you doing? Flirting shamelessly is only going to get you in trouble.

Lady Cowper is a bitch but we already knew that. I wonder if she took as long as her daughter to find a husband.

Wow, Portia really has given up on Pen finding a husband. This is giving me "Like Water for Chocolate" vibes (I hated that movie, so it's not a compliment).

Error #2. Unless I'm wrong, this is Spring 1815. (According to Wikipedia, Queen Charlotte: A Bridgerton Story had Princess Charlotte dying in November 1814, three years before her real-life counterpart.) Emma wasn't published until December 1815. Yeah, we're talking about only a few months and the book does match what El is going through, but still.

Great, another El & Pen fight. El, you can pretend all you like (and you're not even doing a good job) but you are MISERABLE without your best friend. Someone El respects needs to tell her off so that she'll finally grow the fuck up.

Benedict took care of the estate while Anthony and Kate were on their honeymoon? Um, Anthony, WHY DON'T YOU HAVE A STEWARD?! You know, a person you PAY to look after the estate for you instead of asking your brother to do it for free! It gave him something to do, which I'm sure was Anthony's intention, but still!

The Mondriches have just joined the nobility! Well, their eldest son has. Oh boy, Alice is not happy. I don't blame her -- her stress level just increased a hundredfold.

I need to do a @regencyama post about titles, specifically inheriting them. With the Featheringtons and now the Mondriches having a son inheriting from his mother's bloodline, I need to emphasize how rarely this happened in real life. Good on Shonda for including the concept but really, did it have to happen twice in the same episode?

NEWTON!!! Bestest boy ever!

I know that ballroom! Lady Danbury's ballroom either is or is inspired by the Marble Hall at Kedleston. I'd know those columns and the lines of black-and-white panels anywhere.

Pen, honey, your entrance would go better if you didn't look FUCKING TERRIFIED. Albion is a sweetheart, he's the best brother-in-law for Pen (well, on her side). Oh good, she's finally smiling. Portia! How can you think that's a bad color for her? Is she a little color blind? That would explain SO MUCH.

Suddenly get thirsty there, Colin? LOL He has no idea what's coming.

Some of the (presumably) eligible men are finally noticing Pen. How long before Colin steps in? Oh, Pen, you are so awkward around people you don't know well, glad to see that hasn't changed (yet).

El and Cressida talking to some of the new debutantes while Pen is still being awkward with the men. Forget flirting lessons, she doesn't even know how to just talk to men. And El, lowkey making fun of Miss Hartigan for liking embroidery. Grow up, El. At least this girl is true to herself, unlike someone I could name.

Fife is giving off the CREEPIEST vibes as he talks to poor Frannie. What do you bring to the table, good sir? A title? Look around -- titles are a dime a dozen. Surely you can do better than that.

That's what sets Fran off? This scene was one the clips that Netflix released early. I assume the gentlemen had said something offensive but they simply asked her who she is beyond her hobbies. Well, she has been doing nothing but practicing the pianoforte for what, two years now? Maybe she feels there really isn't much to her than that. Well, she's what, 17 now? She's got plenty of time to find herself.

I love how sympathetic and sweet Pen and Frannie are to each other. They're like sisters already.

Cressida with a steel chair! Seriously, there would be a small room off the ballroom reserved just for mending dresses -- tears happened all the time, as well as melted wax dripping from the candles in the chandeliers, spills, etc. But back to Cressida -- she must think very lowly of herself if she truly cannot abide any competition at all.

Too little, too fucking late, El. Choke on your apology, it's neither needed nor wanted. (I love El but haven't liked her for a long time, if that makes sense.)

Another scene Netflix gave us early -- Pen confronting Colin about what he said about her the end of S2. She was already having a bad night and Colin being all smiles was the straw that broke the camel's back.

Uh oh, Pen's writing a new LW column without even getting changed first. Honey, you're writing this in anger, you're probably going to regret at least half of it.

Portia's sweating now with that phony document about the title being questioned. Oh, this guy is threatening her, in that so very English way.

Ooo, are we finally seeing the real Cressida?

A whispering bench! Sorry, I have the tiniest landscaping nerd inside me.

Looks like Kanthony will have a three-month-old with them the beginning of the next Season.

Colin comes the morning after to apologize. Good boy. Still clueless, but good boy.

The Mondriches at their new house and their eldest boy is addressed as Lord Kent. I'm horrible at guessing children's ages but I think this kid is a preteen at most and his life just changed forever.

I will say the portrait of Edmund and Violet is very good. (I assume it's an actual painting and not a photo that has undergone Photoshop or whatever.) Have the writers made Francesca aro? Or at least demisexual? It'll be interesting to see where this goes.

I fucking told you you'd regret that column, Pen. The funny part is that she's not wrong about Colin, but she's certainly not nice about it.

Colin, for fuck's sake, MARINA AND ELOISE RUINED THEMSELVES! If LW hadn't said anything, things actually would have gone a lot worse for Marina, El, your whole family, and especially you, so shut the fuck up.

Four whole minutes of end credits, seriously?

Well, that was certainly an interesting start to both the Season and the season.

[rag-dollyy]

i’m an angry adamandi fan. enjoy. (adamandi spoilers ??)

“portia would never swear-“ SHE DOES SWEAR. SHE SWEARS *IN* THE SHOW. MORE THAN ONCE. (“and now she just fucking hates me?,” “fucking report the murders,” “now’s your fucking shot.) SHE ISN’T AN INNOCENT BABY THAT NEEDS TO BE PROTECTED. SHE’S A 20 YEAR OLD. and she exposed vincent’s murders which like total badass move ok portia you go girl. STOPPPP INFANTILISING HER BECAUSE SHE’S NICE. NICE PEOPLE CAN SWEAR TOO.

ALSO i’ve seen people disregard her trauma, because it’s not as obvious as the other characters’ (BECAUSE SHE’S A SIDE CHARACTER. OF COURSE IT’S NOT GOING TO BE GONE INTO IN AS MUCH DETAIL.) she clearly *does* have trauma. the Track Thing made her scared to even ask a girl out for fear of the same thing happening again. (“i don’t know if it’s worth it especially after the Track Thing. what're the chances she'd be interested in me anyways when she could just tell everyone I like her to bully the new girl?”) <- THIS specific quote is very similar to what happened on the track team, and she’s scared that it’ll happen again, even though it won’t. that sounds like a trauma response to me buddy. PLUS adamandi is set in the 1930s/1940s. she definitely wasn’t treated well for asking a girl out *as* a girl. think about context. 1930s ivy league college and being lesbian. 1930s ivy league college and being lgbtq in *any* way. she was ostracised for her sexuality. that is a traumatising experience. maybe i’m reading into the Track Thing too much, but something very similar happened to me, and it was very traumatising and left me with a constant fear that everyone i loved would leave me if i came out again. (/nav) so speaking from my own experience, and looking at context, portia was certainly traumatised by the Track Thing. so portia has trauma, and we as a fandom need to stop ignoring that.

moral of the story is stop mischaracterising nice people. also stop disregarding side characters’ trauma just because it’s not got into in as much detail.

[iliveforyouilongforyouvesuvia]

YO I GOT A FUNNY IDEA FOR THE ARCANA MAIN 6 + VALERIUS

AALRIGHT THIS IS HOW SHIT GOES DOWN

The main 6 + val are just hanging out yk having a good time THEN SOMEBODY IS LIKE FLIRTING WITH THE MAIN 6 AND MC GOT SOO MAD like at first mc was fine with it and kinda laughing but LIKE THE PERSON IS LIKE GOING TOO FAR AND MC GOT BIG MAD SO YK WHAT MC DID.......Mc PICKED UP the main 6 + val threw them over their shoulder AND SLAPPED THEIR ASS YELLING TO THE PERSON " DONT FUCK WITH ME THEIR ASS *SLAP* IS MINE

TAKE YOUR TIME AND ITS ALRIGHT IF YOU DONT WANNA DO THIS REQUEST

MY BULLSHITERY IS 📈📈

Honestly I don't know how I could possibly improve this? This has been making me laugh so hard @velvetxx1 thank you for the giggle-snorts

I hate to disappoint, but I've only done serious research and character studies of the M6, so here's a few tidbits of how I think they'd react:

Julian is way more turned on by this than he should be, MC just bodily threw him over their shoulder and smacked his ass in public, he is silently sending up prayers of thanks to every deity he can think of and hoping against hope that the fantasy continues

Asra is the least jealous character to exist, so they don't get where MC is coming from but his sense of humor is just twisted enough to burst out laughing. They are going to tease MC about it forever and tell this story at every dinner party

Nadia is very shocked. Nobody has ever dared pick her up like this or acted so crudely around her. Deep down it's stroking her ego that MC will go to such lengths to stake their claim on her. She will be punishing them though

Is it physically possible to pick Muriel up? Either way, he's probably already wanting to crawl out of his skin when somebody he doesn't know starts showing him so much attention, so MC's response has him completely checking out of reality. Inanna is howling with wolf laughter

Portia's already giggling before MC even steps in, she's both flattered by the attention and uncomfortable with how far it's going. When MC finally reacts her first feeling is relief, then astonishment, and then a deep pride in her badass, loudmouthed partner

Lucio's not even hesitating, he's glaring upside down at the offender from under MC's elbow while they tell them off: "YEAH THATS RIGHT BITCH, MY ASS IS THEIRS. YOU TELL EM BABE, SMACK ME AGAIN SO THEY KNOW YOU MEAN IT."

[bells-of-black-sunday]

6, 7, 8.

𝐂𝐡𝐨𝐨𝐬𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐯𝐢𝐨𝐥𝐞𝐧𝐜𝐞 | 𝐀𝐜𝐜𝐞𝐩𝐭𝐢𝐧𝐠

6. which ship fans are the most annoying?

S.elf s.hippers no question. Granted most of them are like 13, but they're all so annoying. At what point are they going to admit they just like the way the character looks and not the way they actually are? Because 99% of them will re-write characters like M.yers or even fucking E.ddie G.luskin into being the picture perfect white nuclear hallmark family. All of them needs kids doesn't matter if they'd be a good parent or not, all of them need to have every problematic trait removed so they're the ideal partner, etc. etc. It's a big reason I have so many x r.eader tags blocked, they're all so annoying.

Not talking about the people who don't do this and genuinely, I could not care less if someone does, but I swear the most bigoted shit comes out of that community and its so weird.

7. what character did you begin to hate not because of canon but because how how the fandom acts about them?

Going to be 100% honest, I love all my G.hostface mutuals and I love all their portrayals and they are legit the only reason why I even still like him.

The amount of "uwu he didn't do anything wrong, because his dad was abusive" shit I see. How when I wrote him I got treated like shit constantly by people coming into my dms and not reading my rules to try to push ships, hell even people I thought were friends of mine would treat me like utter shit over him, it's left a really sour taste in my mouth to where I just started to hate him for a while.

Even now I'm like, yeah there's so many better characters. My mutuals though? I love all my mutuals Danny's, they make me enjoy him as a character again.

8. common fandom opinion that everyone is wrong about

"We want more female killers"

Y'all couldn't even handle fucking Portia.

There's so much art of every stereotypically hot white male character in this game and a really cool pirate killer everyone's been asking for gets released to utter crickets except to bitch that shes a person of color. Yeah. Not to mention every time a female killer gets a lore update, people get so pissed about it when they're villains. Susie is popular, because people can coddle her and that's about it. You guys don't want female killers and you certainly don't want ones that are unapologetic about what they do. Staring directly at the people who never even gave S.kull M.erchants lore a chance even though her tome is super interesting.

[boyharder]

🔥 haymitch

i spare like no!!! feelings!!! when i say this because I'm so SICK of the haymitch mischaracterizing in the year 2024........

thoughts & breakdown of hayffie (negatively) under the cut

haymitch is so touch avoidant that i don't see him with ANYONE canonically minus chaff (his best friend and has known him the longest) or hazelle (slowburn but i love them and they are often real to me!) he never interacts physically with anyone minus, say katniss? and this is usually to comfort her/hold her in the times she needed it most. (as a FATHER FIGURE.)

and what i feel about woody harrelson's already poor take on haymitch which is already made bad solely by the fact that he was whitewashed, is that the kiss that happens with hayffie is so out of character for him. haymitch hates effie. effie hates haymitch. they weren't canon in the books, didn't get along in the books lest they were with cinna and portia to keep up a good impression but the fact is that there's so much wrong with the ship as a whole. effie is heavily prejudiced against 12 in the beginning, calling it “barbaric” and looking down on it and wanting to be moved to another district. as a whole, effie as a district escort who not only delights in her job (i don't care about her redemption because she says such horrifying shit that can't be washed off by joining the rebellion,) but she also could care less about haymitch. for him, she represents everything he's tried to flush out for 24 years, and who he is the opposing side to, especially because she's capitol. but not even just that, her role as a district escort is like a modern day grim reaper, she finds joy in the sense of children being sent to fight to the death. how long had she been preaching to him this consistent rhetoric that his district is foul and she could do better than being stuff with him LONG BEFORE katniss and peeta came into the picture?

hayffie's dynamic, when you actually deep it, is oppressor (the capitol/effie) and the oppressed (the districts/haymitch.) how is that romantic in any way? the movies sugar-coat the meanings a lot and so i understand why it gets shipped blindly. but for book readers? and just as a general concept? it's so weird. it's not your doomed, enemies to lovers, it's a ship with clear power play and a lot of fucked up stuff within its idea, including oppression and classicism along with other stuff!

[colinfeatherington]

afraid I’m going to hit post limit for the first time in like a decade because I can’t stop yapping so just gonna add my thoughts on to this post akfhsjajd

colin touching her face like that during the dance! about to kiss her!!! and the queen rolls up???

penelope leaving bc she forgot she was a bridgerton now like saw it coming from a mile away but it still killed me 😭

I knew everyone’s hopeful guesses about the sofa sleeping would be wrong but damn I really hate this, like they’re dragging this out way too much it’s really putting a dampener on everything, we’ve only got one episode left!! and if the blue dress bloody brilliant scene is the reconciliation then we’ve already seen it and that blows too

Idk this fucking sucks she’s never gonna get her wedding night back I hate this, she’s already had the night of her engagement ruined and her engagement party?? why couldn’t the queen have had that scene a day or two later

Also insane side note but when Polin held hands at the wedding I was like wow… just like nic and luke 💀

Idkk not thrilled with this direction it might just be bc it’s the first watch and I’m worrying about everything but oh episode 7 you have exhausted me

well we finally know what bugs is at least

john is still in Scotland!!! A small win

AGATHA BRINGING UP THE FACT SHE FUCKED VIOLETS DAD???? OKAYYYYY

The portia pen fanedits are gonna be crazyyyyy oh my god these scenes Polly I will miss you so bad

Eloise and pen matching purple at the wedding let’s goooo

[crescentcampbell]

So, I watched Bridgerton

I haven't had internet for almost TWO DAYS. I got home on the 15th, and I did get to watch Bridgerton, but I had to watch it on my phone. And then I got my internet fixed and I rewatched it again. AND I FINALLY HAVE TUMBLR AGAIN, THANK FUCK.

I couldn't even open my word documents. It was dicey. ANYWAY.

I am obsessed with Penelope as Whistledown talking about the ladies of the Ton. I love that they all seemed like Wallflowers by other people and she focused on something other than looks when describing them. I also love the diversity this season. We had a deb who speaks BSL and a lord who is in a wheelchair.

KANTHONY have two things on their mind and two things only. That is each other and making an heir. Also, Kate fits into the family SO nicely. She's at ease amongst ALLL of the chaos and knows everything. Seriously. Violet is so frazzled she isn't even sure where Francesca is, but Kate is like, "...Uh, she's already got this, you guys."

Francesca's storyline totally took me by surprise. I was kind of preparing for Daphne 2.0, but steamier. Her and Lord Kilmartin are so awkward and I love them. It's like, "Yes, I am obsessed with you. No, I cannot speak near you because of it," which I love. Also am wondering if we will meet Michael yet in part two? Should be interesting.

Prudence and Philippa are hilarious. They are so naive about everything and Portia explaining things to them I love. I HATE Portia treating Penelope like she's going to be her caregiver. That absolutely sucks.

I loved that Pens makeover wasn't her losing weight. She just updated her look to suit her. If this had been made a decade ago, they would have gone that route, but THIS IS A PLUS SIZE LOVE INTEREST IN A PERIOD DRAMA and I'm obsessed. It does bug me that people have modern issues with weight but....you win some, you lose some.

COLIN IS A WINDSWEPT PIRATE. He's trying to be in his Anthony Bridgerton Rake Era but he already knows he wants Penelope and is totally obsessed with her. For four episodes, he just wants to spend time with Pen, gets annoyed at Eloise for not being her friend, and SAVES HER FROM A HOT AIR BALOON.

Lord Debbling is not at all what I expected and I loved that. He's very practical about things and loves nature and mostly wants a wife to take care of his house. Like, he did almost have him on his side at one point with Colin having threesomes and flirting with everyone.

ALSO COLINHAS A THREESOME. Also, I read too much smut um...

Benedict having a relationship with an older woman I actually like. I am worried about how it will end though. I don't want her connected to Sophie because I actually like her. So, no idea how it will play out, but I think she is supposed to be Benedicts fling this season.

[feldspursfiyero]

okay, some vague overall thoughts for bridgerton 3x01-04 (spoilers ofc)

benedict didn't get much to do. am disappoint. all he did was run away from mamas and debutantes, and find a widow and then he did a lot of fucking. impressive

this so far is the season of the sideplots being more interesting

creloise is the literal damn highlight of the season so far. ESPECIALLY cressida

anthony is also, to me, always the damn highlight of any season. except for s1 on my first watch. heh.

but on that note, since cressida's gone the same way as anthony, now i get to rewatch s1 and s2 cressida scenes and just skjfgnkfg fall in love with her even more, like i did with anthony

ugh, cressida's dad! :( but as someone else said, what's wrong with befriending a bridgerton? haha maybe eloise is not Male enough. THEN LET HER MARRY A WOMAN, U ANCIENT DICK

i love i love i love all the a&b scenes we got, and anthony being the big bro and looking out for gregory

speaking of gregory, what was the purpose of him having a broken arm lmao. IS there a purpose? will there be a purpose?

rip that anthony went on a second honeymoon and had the balls to do it, i miss him being chained to his desk with violet slowly eviscerating him with a blunt knife

(i did detect some potential delicious conflict though re how slow violet's been at moving out of the house. i wonder if the show will get into that)

francesca and john stirling. aaah they snuck that one right by us. i love him and i love them! i'm not sure how much i like francesca yet though; i don't hate her but there's nothing i particularly like yet

so this is the first season where it's not (primarily) told from the point of view of a bridgerton. interesting.

i thought debling would've caught on earlier that some weird shit is going on with pen/colin, and with pen/eloise/cressida. but... well, either he did, or he's as dumb as a doornail (haha i know switched up the phrase). but yeah, at first i liked the idea of pen/debling, but by ep 4 he had become rather flavourless

portia's gonna be shook when she finds out pen and colin are getting married :3 she better be happy for pen! and also like, be nicer to her; i feel like there was a look from her towards the end of the ball in ep 4 where she might be rethinking how she talks to pen

anyway, will add to this post if i think of anything more.

ETA:

that spoiler we got after the bowral screening of anthony being gifted a venetian glass ball; has that been cut from the ep...? instead he's just holding a ball which he is gonna try and fit into his mouth and/or hole for Science. string somehow attached ofc! can't have it getting lost 😈

SKDJNGK nearly forgot. okay so i have some thoughts re will and alice mondrich. with how gossipy and snipey and judgey the ton is, i'm surprised they were fairly well accepted into the ton. that is something i had not extrapolated on based on s1-2. but i do feel like cressida's mum and her friends are doing them dirty behind their backs. so that's... good... good as in, it doesn't invalidate what i headcanoned for a/b fic lmao

aaaaaand, once again for good measure - anthony's gay lil sit:

[asmo-cosmetics]

i forgot one of the things i hate most about the arcana is how openly hostile every single fucking character is to julian. it's so stupid. every other love interest besides julian and lucio are besties or at least like each other, but julian is despised by the others and the narrative itself past the point that it even makes sense.

sure at first they can hate him, that's fine, they think he's a murderer, but even past that it's STILL constantly "oohhh julian's stupid julian's childish julian's work and interests and passions and sexual preferences are all so funny and silly and worthy of ridicule by everyone despite his discomfort and without his consent but also we're going to frame it as 'good-natured ribbing' narratively even though it's objectively just bullying" biting and clawing and maiming and killing. i hate these writers so fucking much.

EVERY OTHER CHARACTER is allowed to be portrayed as competent at their job and hobbies, even lucio to an extent. but not julian!!! julian sux lol!!!!! julian a Medical Doctor puts more trust in science than magic? omg BIGOT! julian who does not like, trust, or have any interest in magic, and has never studied it, can't tell when something is ""obviously"" magic to experienced magicians and assumes its effect to be medicinal? wow he's so STUPID OMG... julian uses strange methods in his practice like leeches? a common old-fashioned treatment in a old-fashioned setting [nevermind that it's a FANTASY setting and leeches may very well be effective in broader applications than irl (and yes there are modern irl instances of medicinal leeches why does everybody act like leeches are so wild and crazy medicine-wise?) in this universe? like they might literally just work? we don't know?] he must be a total hack lol i bet he gives patients cocaine too!! he was a pirate? bet he was bad at it! he's an actor? bet he's bad at it!

not to mention how WEIRD they are about his identity. like for a game that supposedly takes place in a world with no identity-based bigotry julian suuuuure faces a lot of what looks a lot like homophobia and bottom-shaming. don't worry you don't have to be threatened by him he's not a REAL man... no no he's cis we just mean he's submissive. but that's something everyone's allowed to tease him about, also, even though that's obviously inappropriate and mean as fuck. just. GOD. i fucking hate these devs. it's so fucking gross and stupid and weird. it doesn't even make sense, it just makes the other characters seem like assholes for how they're treating him, and especially when they write portia to bully him it doesn't even sound like her. i'm in hell. i'm in hell.