#i hate mhself
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I hate myself. I hate myself. I hate myself. I hate myself. I’m too easily jealous. I wish had other people. People who I feel happy around. They’re all across the world. I deleted my other account for venting because I thought maybe my parents wouldn’t make me want to rip my head off. Haha, I was wrong. I was wrong. I was wrong. I was wrong. I was wrong. I was wrong. I was wrong. I was wrong. I was wrong. I was wrong. I was wrong. I was wrong. I was wrong. I was wrong. I was wrong. I was wrong. I was wrong. I was wrong. I was wrong. I was wrong. I was wrong. I was wrong. I was wrong. I was wrong. I was wrong. I’m a horrible child. I was wrong. I was wrong. I was wrong. I was wrong. I was wrong. I was wrong. I was wrong. I was wrong. I was wrong. I was wrong.
#vent#i deserve pain#i hate mhself#but hey who cares#people will get over#if i die would anyone csre#probably#oh well#stuck in a loop
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hey I made it to episode 12 of pd. it's my life's mission to cdream style fix the mallard conway problem by killing him then reviving him then killing him then reviving him then killing him then reviving him then killing him then reviving him then
#i make yet anothet post just for me 👍#jrwi#liveblogging#IM GOING TO FUCKING *********************#I HATE THIS GUY SO MUCH#IM GOING TO KILL MHSELF THEN HIM#SOBBING GENUINE FUCKING TEARS HOW COULD YOU DO THAT TO THESE KIDDSSSSSSS#THEYRE JUST TEENAGERS THATS JUSTT THEIR DAD CANNOT BELIEVE HES DOING ALL RHIS FOR LEVERAGE#FUCKING KILLYOURSELFFFFFFFFFFFFF
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😂😂 so like 😂😂😂😂😂 when am i going to get the instructions for making friends and talking to people everyone else got 😂😂 its a little late 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂
#Whyd rhey have to make this human connection shit so hard . Why doesnt anyone care abourt what i care about#how come everyone else can hold conversations about nothing without getting bored and i cant .#how come i feel like im receiving automated responses. i feel like my interactions are all surface level#whh doesnt anyone seem as interested in anything as i do . Why do i feel like im being judged for indulging in my interests#how come when i say something it doesnt feel like anyone is sayi g anything back . Why do my friends turn my sentences into filler .#why does it feel like im in the middle of a hivemind and i dont know it . why does it feel like its all computer generated .#why can everyone else talk and laugh and converse withoit trouble but when its my turn everyone treats it like an obligation#nobody wants to watch what i wsnt to. nobody wants to listen to what i want to. nobody wants to talk about what i want to.#And if they just go along with what i wsnt to do im just wasting their time . we wont even talk about it . theres no expression .#i hate enjoying mhself when nobody else is. and i hate when others are enjoying themselves without me#but apparently im not a part of 'together'#how come even in small social circles nobody is treated equally . Whh does preference come into it.#Man. whatever.
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So so sooo so miserable being a horror fan bc every time I’m like aight lemme watch something, there’s just….nothing 😑
#I think I’ve watched 75% of all the horror movies & shows in the world#so maybe I should kill mhself#been scrolling through every single streaming service tryna find something#this is a hate crime
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#tw sh#tw self harm#I have nowhere else to vent ignore me#if I don’t type this out I’ll kill mhself#I have had two self harm relapses since yesterday#to quote Lana I’ve been chopping it up#I’m in so much pain lol#emotionally k mean#I guess physically too but#tw suicide mention#venting#I keep wondering literally why I don’t just finally do it#I fuck up everything I fucked up my entire life#hurting myself is the only way I know how to cope#and it’s what I feel I deserve#anyway shoutout to the adult bitches who still remember how to wrestle blades out of razors to ruin their thighs#it didn’t help but#ok I need to get this off my chest#trigger warning#trigger warning self harm#hate being one of those mfers that constantly thinks about ending it but isn’t brave enough#this is not election related lol
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i need to mspaint before i do something drastic
#txt#im gonna draw him wearing my glasses. i wish i had my glaases#i could get them but i hate mhself and want my eyes to get even worse
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#some of thr shit i went through is . actually awful to yhink abt#and it almost makes me never eanna date again.#like not in a “im scared itll happen again” way but in a#im good on . being that close to someoen for s while. that was a Lot#like i knoww this is 100% a trauma response bc i did smth similar w my friendships for a good few yrs#n i can feel mhself doing it again neow . but . its okay for now i think?#n isdk if its good or not. like . ik i dont have tl figurr it iut righy now but#not having it figured out sucks i hate . when my own brain feels Unanswered and missing stuff !#whack in all honesty.#anyway . its so odd how this . impacted n and hos i wanna go abt my own love life :(#bc i rlly dont fsncy focyhis shit again ANY time soon actually. hesled or not. thats fucked.#all of that is fucked.#today unlocked a few more puzzle pieces#and while i dont Like tje picturd tjeyre creating . im okay with it to a degree#bc shit can chsnge but . its fine#i can deal w this wejrd . thought and conclusion
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I’ll take stupid shit that hurt my feelings for 500 Alex
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30/01/2024, 16:55pm
Anything I want I never ever get.
#i knew taking on thiw new role wasnt yonna be good#i knew it was juet gonna stress me out and make me do things i dont wanna#i knew nessa would jsut throw my name for things and juet assjme im okay witj anytbiny#all i fuckiny wanted was a goor job witj flexibility and to be content#instwad im dragging mhself in everyday im sad all the tjme#my fuckiny family are pissing me off constantly and work is constantly pulling my laat nerve#im fuckiny done with everything#i got nothing i wanted and im notjing i thought id be#snd now i get to go to a place that triggers my anxiety and negative thinking and i get ti be alone#or wity someone who shows me up#fuckiny hate my life#work2.0#im still fuckiny here 6 years fucking later#miserable more than ever.#mytalks
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ehitshirshitshitshirshit
#i dont eanna cry during the lecture#why am i like thus#i fucking hate mhself#im always rhe problrm#i wanna disappear#merin’s talking
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Somedays you wake up and just know their gonna be shit
like today for example
#stripes feels weird#I dont want to anymorw#Having a mental breakdown because of time is so stupid#why didnt my parents CARE that I sleept till 2pm?!#the entire day is ruined#I hate mhself sometimes#I hate myself so much#I want to cry#they dont get how ruined the day is because I sleept so long#none of them get it#i hate this#I want a day reset please#I want to vomit I hate this
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Being an adult is crying while eating pizza and watching a movie at 8:30pm on a Saturday night
#me rn#crying over some asshole guy who I was kinda seeing in he’d#me ? not drinking? I’m shocked lmaoo#I as so close to k!lling mhself yesterday. eh very fun a load of pills#.my drug tolerance must by up there man.#I’m 28 I can’t believe it tbh#I look early 20s but I hate the way I’m 28
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DEVASTATING UPDATE BUT ALSO FUCKING CRAZY (Tomodachi Life):
(If you want me to add any Hermit or MCYT in particular then just ask and I will probably do it. If you want a particular romance then I can also fuck with the genders if needed.
But these motherfuckers have too much autonomy so they may not get together (as demonstrated today))
- Tango is here‼️‼️
- RANCHERS FRIENDSHIP ESTABLISHED
- GRIAN AND TANGO 100% FRIENDSHIP BBGS‼️‼️🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥
- Impulse and Tango at 17%… yikesss😬😬
- but SKIZZ AND TANGO AT 95% FRIENDSHIP
- Timmy, Joel and Grian top 3 most popular islanders bbgs🔥🔥🔥🔥 bad boys 4evah
- GUYS IM KILLING MYSELF SCAR HAS A LOVE ISSUE
- IF ITS NOT GRIAN I WILL KILL MHSELF
- ITS JOEL
- WHAT THE FUCK WHAT THE FUCK WHAT THE FUCK
- I’m not letting it happen
- I’m gonna sob he’s fucking sad
- REN IS IN LOVE
- REN AND PEARL??????
- OKAYYYYY
- YEAHHHHHH THEYRE TOGETHERRRRRR
- Scar is fuckinf devastated
- I’m pampering this motherfucker to get him to calm down
- I will get endgame Scarian even if it takes upsetting Scar 1000 fuckinf times by rejecting his love advances.
- MORE LOVE FROM PEARL
- SHES PROPOSING TO REN ALREADY DAMN GIRL ITS BEEN FUCKINF 10 MINUTES NOT EVEN FUCKING WITHT YOU
- I HATE HELPING TO PROPOSE BHT THEYRE TOGETHERRRR YEAHHHHHHHH
#HC Pen Island#tangotek#grian#impulsesv#skizzleman#smallishbeans#goodtimeswithscar#gtwscar#gtws#jimmy solidarity#solidaritygaming#ranchers duo#rendog#pearlescentmoon#what their duo/ship name guys what’s even happening rn#they started dating then got engaged and then got married in literally 10 minutes I’m not even lying#this game hates Scarian frfr#Hermitcraft
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It's fuckin 2 a.m. in my country rn. But I don't care cause it's MY BIRTHDAY. ITSN MY BTUTHDAY MH BRITHD DAY MY BRITBDHJSSKS. Have some Saiouma doodles because I hate mhself. I'm gonna go pass out now Ayyayayayayyyaayayyaay
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Y’all and these damn “tell me who type i am!!”
“I love root beer!!! Hate Ketchup!!! Skinny girl!! Beautiful brown hair and brown eyes!!! I have anxiety!!! I love sharks!!! Introvert!!!
Who’s type am i!????? ❤️
BYEEEEEE LMFAOOAOAAOAOOA IM PISSIND MHSELF
Like OMG UR TWINNING W MATT 🤞🏻 UR TOTALLY HIS TYPE 🫶🏻🫶🏻🫶🏻🫶🏻🫶🏻
I can always tell when they use key things. I just give them the pickle and move on with my day.
#nat speaks#anon answered#send anons#anon ask#thanks anon!#anonymous#sturniolo triplets#matt sturniolo#christopher sturniolo#nicolas sturniolo#sturniolo fanfic#chris sturniolo#sturniolo smut#i need him in a way that is concerning to feminism#sturniolo x reader#sturniolo imagine
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Just posted out my first ever OC gore piece, YIKES. I'm so sorry Lily o(╥﹏╥)o, ya shouldn't have to suffer but its for PLOT. Poor Sydney too, she was the best wife. I hate and love the lore, also got kinda descriptive but like, not too much? It could've been worse?
I JUST READ KT… GENUINELY IM TWEAKING OUT.
THE FUCKIGN… MOMENTARY JOY LILY FELT UPON SEEING HER WAIF!!! ONLY FOR IT TO TURN INTO UTTER DESPAIR!!!! BECAUSE SYDNEY WAS KILLED OH MY GODDDFGGHH OH MY GOD IMGOING TO KIL MHSELF
ALL OF RHOSE PRECAUTIONS SHE TOOK JUST FOR JT TO END UP USELESS… nell IM GETTING TOO IMMERSED I CANT DO TRAGIC YURI (◞‸◟) 💔💔
and everythging was just right methinks! everything flowed out smoothly as usual!!! all this angst because everywan has their own thing going on really just adds onto it all… lily with her waif and loss of credo, newo w lily coming back after believing she had abandoned him and also dealing with credo’s loss… FUCK!!!
still!! there’s hope for the sparda family because in the midst of their losses they’ve still got each other and i think that’s beautiful!!!! they just.,,, need to get out of emotional constipation first…..gulp.. and laik considering the circumstances that’s gonna take a LOT of time which i’m in shambles over,,LMFAO i’m getting too into the lore….. bless yew nell mwa…
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