#i got emotional thinking about what they could've had...

[dont-offend-the-bees]

Fuck I hate being an adult. I need a more adult adult to help with the volatile emotional situation.

[sysig]

The uh

The first play session went rather well

[secriden]

tags from @purgatoryandme

one reason i think liu qingge has such great potential is that he's one of the only characters entirely free from the PIDM narrative. because he dies early in PIDM, sqq isn't coming into every conversation and interaction expecting lqg to adhere to a preconceived script. this allows sqq to actually see lqg as a person and for his words and actions to be taken at face value.

i just think this is great potential for sqq to still be completely oblivious or in denial about lbh and yqy's attentions (because he's so fixated on how bad/complicated PIDM!sqq's relationships are with them) whilst also catching wind of lqg's growing feelings for him because he isn't hampered by any preconceived notions of what they're dynamic "should" be.

so give me sqq noticing the way lqg's mannerism soften around him, how his gruffness changes, how he spends more time just having tea with sqq even after his meridians have been cleansed as they start to have civil conversation about sect business. recognising lqg's care in returning his fans; seeking common ground over their shared love of monster hunting (even if lqg just cares about fighting them, can he maybe smash them in such a way that shixiong can study them afterwards?) and discussions on cultivation techniques and the differences between bai zhan and qing jing styles.

sqq who is so just so grateful to have someone in his corner, someone he feels safe with, who he doesn't have to second guess during every conversation. someone who was never supposed to be around by this point in the narrative, and so is entirely shen qingqui's.

[anothermonikan]

Man high school was fucked up. You ever think about that. Thank fucking god I'm not in high school anymore

[anisespice]

“ accidents happen ” || tokyo rev.

cont.

synopsis: in which they discover you had their child and kept it from them all these years later.

pairing: bonten x fem!reader [ mikey, ran, sanzu ]

warnings: mature content ahead. MDI. mature language, crude humor, angst (if you squint really hard), deadbeat!bonten (unintentionally), not proof-read so there may be errors lol and i think that’s it :))

notes: i just want the drama >:) may make more parts, and even extend said headcannons into longer fics in the future, but wanted to post something quick for mother’s day. hope you enjoy!

When you disappeared off the face of the earth, MIKEY had never been the same. One fight. One argument that spiraled out of control, and you were just gone...

He had people looking for you for about a couple years, the trail ran cold after a while and he had half a mind to think you were dead. Up until he got intel of your whereabouts one morning during a meeting.

That man got up and left immediately.

He wasn’t accompanied with any of his men, only because he didn’t want to draw any unwanted attention in the broad daylight. Sure, him wearing a black hood, ball cap, and mask in a park didn’t really help him look inconspicuous but it at least concealed his identity enough for him to blend in. Mikey sat on a bench for a good forty minutes, anxious, making anyone who passed him shiver from his intense aura alone; even birds walked around him. After almost an hour of waiting, he began to feel frustrated. Perhaps, the intel was false. Just as he went to stand, already conjuring up ways to have Sanzu execute the idiot who wasted his time, he heard it.

Your voice. Seizing him, like a siren’s call.

His eyes were alert, darting around until they landed on your figure, spotlighted by the sun, like an angel descending from the heavens. You looked good, healthy. That was good. An array of emotions fought for their turn in Mikey’s heart—Relief, distress, anger, nostalgia. He couldn’t just pick one, especially when it came to you. As he watched from his spot, doing his best to not seem suspicious, he clocked the people you were approaching with excitement, your peppy stride as you waved at, what he presumed, to be mother and daughter.

However, his entire world turned upside down when the little girl extended out her arms towards you, and said “Mama!”

“Hello, my darling.~” You cooed, taking her into your awaiting arms from the woman, embracing the toddler tightly. “Mama missed you so much.”

“Missed you, mama!” was the child’s reply, followed by her giggles.

A bucket of cold water would’ve been better than this. Watching you converse with who he now assumes to be the babysitter, Mikey felt faint. Vision blurring, head pounding, heart clenching. You…you…no. There’s no way. You wouldn’t have moved on…you couldn’t have, not like this, not from him. You loved him, didn’t you? You still love him, didn’t you?

How could you…how could you?

Before he knew it, he started to follow you around. From the park, to the store, all the way back to your apartment. He already phoned some of the executives to start working in on the babysitter, and anyone else in your new found circle for information. He wanted answers. He needed them.

By the time you began fixing dinner, with your daughter laid down for a nap, you receive a knock at your door. Who could that be at this hour?

RAN was chilling outside the rendezvous spot for something the boss and a few other execs were participating in, having a smoke, minding his business, up until he sees a little girl with pigtails wearing a school uniform approaching, standing before him and just…staring. She barely came up to his thighs, could've been no older than seven. She was practically staring into his soul with bright lavender eyes that scarily reminded him of Rin’s when he was that age.

He stared back, head tilted as he blew out the smoke from the corner of his mouth. The hell was a kid doing on this side of town?

Then, after an uncomfortable staring contest, the little girl points at his cigarette. “My ma says those things are bad for you.”

Ran raised a brow, “Does she now?”

“Mmhm! She says it makes people unhappy.”

He offered a thoughtful nod, an amused grin spreading across his face. “Mm. Do I look unhappy?”

The girl looked at Ran for a minute, eyes squinted. Eventually, she shook her head. “No. But, ma also says people who are always unhappy get better at hiding it.”

Ran’s grin faltered. Her unwavering stare started to unnerve him, especially after hearing such a heavy statement come from such a small package.

After a brief moment of silence, he chuckled softly, taking one last drag of his cigarette before flicking it away. He exhaled. “Smart woman.”

The little girl beamed, “Mmhm! My ma knows a lot of stuff.”

“Tsk. But not ‘Stranger Danger’, apparently.”

She tilted her head, curious. “Huh?”

“You shouldn’t be wandering around by yourself, let alone approaching someone you don’t know. ‘s not safe. Especially for nosy little girls who stick their noses in other people’s business. Your ma never taught you that?”

The little girl rolled her eyes, hands on her hips. “Duh. Of course she did. Everyone knows that rule,” she exasperated. Ran snorted, but yielded when she squinted at him, pointing as she sassed. “And I do so know you, so you’re not a stranger.”

This time, Ran couldn’t help the incredulous laugh. “Oh, you know me, huh? That’s not good. ‘m supposed to keep a low profile. Say, you ain’t a cop are you?” He teased, earning another eye roll.

“No. Too small to be a cop, dummy.”

“Oh, pardon me, I didn’t notice. Where do you know me from, then?”

The little girl pointed over to the building..where the executives were having their meeting. She beamed, “Ma’s works in there. On important people days she can’t get me from school, so she tells me to come straight here, and to not talk to the purple man that stands near the building. She says you’re mean.”

Ran smirked, then gave a half-hearted shrug.

“She also says you’re my pa. But, I never believed her. You’re too old.”

Ran’s smirk dropped.

Whether more from the first comment or the last, you decide. But, one thing was for certain: he needed another cigarette.

SANZU cackled watching some guy struggle to round up a couple of rowdy twins at the convenience store. One was knocking shit off the shelves while the other ran circles around the guy. It was what he needed for his bitch of a hangover, a good laugh to distract from the ache in his skull.

However, he wasn’t laughing for long when you came around the corner of the isle, holding a few items with a smile on your face that soon faded once you saw the scene unfolding before you; the pinkette thought he was still tripping balls. Blinking a few times to allow any after effects of the drugs to clear up, when you didn’t disappear he used his long legs to swiftly yeet behind one of the shelves, peering around it like some paranoid stalker. The last time you had spoken, you had threatened to castrate him with your teeth if you ever saw him again.

And he’d be damned if he tried your bluff.

He watched in awe as you straightened those twins up quick. If he didn’t know any better, he would’ve thought they were trained to obey you, and only you. Any other authority be damned. While the guy was putting all the stuff back on the shelves, sweaty and out of breath, you gently reprimanded them for causing trouble. You still made that cute pouty face you always did whenever you were mad at him…

“What did we talk about earlier? Hm? Mr. Satoru was very kind to help mama today, you know. You two promised me you’d be on your best behavior for him.”

Sanzu gagged. This was the rebound you let nut in you? This huffy moron who can’t handle a couple of ankle biters, this was your king? He had half a mind to just gut the guy to put him out of his misery from that pathetic display from earlier, alone. He couldn’t imagine how difficult it must be back home. He remembers when he was that age—Rowdy, reckless, the Antichrist. Adorable, but deadly. God bless that poor bastard’s soul.

Wait…Mister? Not…dad?

The first twin whined, stomping their feet. “He’s too boringggg!”

Come to think of it…if Sanzu squinted…the longer he looked at the little family…he swore the more he saw the resemblance of himself in the tiny gremlins. From the hair, to the eyes, all the way down to the mannerisms…Hang on. When had been the last time you two fucked? Three…no, was it four years ago?

The second twin huffed, pointing at the man. “Yeah! And he’s jus’ being nice so that he can sleep in your bed, mama!”

You flushed, nervously chuckling as you looked around to make sure no one heard. Sanzu ducked behind a bag of chips, now nothing but eyes peeking through the gaps of food on the shelf.

So…that loser’s not the father? Then…could that mean..?

“He’s mama’s boyfriend, remember? He’s allowed to do that. And he’ll be around for a while, so I want you two to be nice, okay?”

“…okay, mama.” They grumbled.

Sanzu almost popped a blood vessel, fist clenched around a bag of Lays and nearly busting it. He chuckled darkly, “Oh. We’ll see about that.”

© 2024-2025 anisespice ッ all rights reserved.

likes, comments & reblogs much appreciated!

[chaosandmarigolds]

(Ahem ahem)

Now by no means is the military *homophobic* nor is Price. However, they has seen enough buddies get "married" for the sake of having a better housing arrangment on the base, so it be had very quickly become increasingly difficult for couples of the same sex to get better housing or for their marriage to be considered real.

So when your Lieutenant came up to you on that random Sunday morning, saying nothing other than, "I'm bi, legally married to Johnny but thr fuckfaces at housing say m faking."

If your eyes hadn't seemed interested from your dazed and sleepy stare the next sentence caused you lock in.

"Marry me."

...you shut the door in his face.

Now, about four hours later you had been trying to get coffee, key word had been trying. Until Price came up to you, seemingly to be more confused than anything. "Congratulations."

You falter, the warm liquid barely reaching your lips and you give him a look, "Ya know i know I'm usally late on my reports but no need to be a dick when I do turn em in."

"No. On getting married."

Silence.

....that fucker

"Oh! Heh, yeah yeah, I kinda...didn't want him bringing any attention to it. Didn't think he would-"

"Yeah never saw you and Johnny getting toegther."

You almost gagged, coughing as you doubled over within the mess hall and your face feeling incredibly hot. "Mmhm."

The next two days had been a very odd blur, everything seemingly to be just a mess of emotions and very dramatic pleading from your "husband" Who already had a husband?? They had a decent amount of paperwork to do, and then movers and then more paperwork as your "best friend" wanted to move in as well.

"So how long have you been married?"

"A year-"

"Few months-"

...

"What he means is that we eloped a year ago and had a family and friends wedding few months ago."

..

"I have to answer all these questions about you?" You look at the small stack of questions, "Johnny i don't fucking know your mother's maiden name."

"O'Donnel."

"...very Scottish of you-"

"Not Scottish, lassie."

"Oops."

--

Then came actually selling the whole bit, a few kisses on the cheeks there, some flirting there. Very domestic really.

Then came trying to explain it to your girlfriends

"He isn't gay?"

"Girl you are marrying a gay man isn't he fucking that-the scary one?"

"...no no no they're just...ya know?? Bromance?? It's so bromance."

--

"I don't wanna go on a date."

"We have to lassie, we said the anniversary was today so we gotta-"

"But Price is on my ass about-"

"You're going." The sound of the lieutenant made you jump, of course he was in your room, why wouldn't he be in your room?

"Hey! I never agreed to any of this."

"Plllleeeeaaaase lassie, Price already approved the time off."

--

Two months in you started to get different remarks from friends and even coworkers

"You could've just said you didn't wanna choose."

"Took them both?"

"Ya know I read an article that said those sorts of relationships are much more sustainable-"

It didn't quite click till you were talking to Kyle one day-

"So how are ya boys?"

You laugh, going on with typing the report, "my boys?"

Kyle seemed to stare at you long enough that you looked up to him, and then he spoke, "Is it not true?"

"Is...what not true?"

"That you, Soap and LT are in one of those....poly thingies?"

"Polyamory." You correct the term and look down, trying to find the words but failing- sure the lines between friendship and...whatever was blurred but that was to be expected as you were all living in the same house, "No?? We- he jus-"

"No shame! No shame, just didn't know."

(Annnnd that's all I got. Toodles!!!)

[ba9go]

to be katsuki's (is to win, always)

thinking about the way katsuki has grown over the past few seasons makes me really emotional. bakugou katsuki, you win no matter what. katsuki is victory incarnate. just loving him feels like i've won already.

prohero!katsuki x prohero!reader, reader comes home injured, hurt/comfort, fluff (sfw)

your ears were ringing when you reached the front door. your head was pounding, your vision was foggy, and your body was finally hit with all the fatigue from today's mission.

you're battered and bruised, bleeding from a gaping wound on your thigh. your hero costume is torn and tattered. you could've stayed onsite to get patched up by the medics, but the medics had their hands full with other injured pros and civilians too. you were tired, and you wanted to go home.

so you gritted your teeth and dragged yourself home.

you're slumped against the door as you're fumbling with your keys. something wet drips from your temple, down the side of your cheek. you wipe it, thinking it's sweat, but it's blood. no wonder you were feeling a little light-headed.

you're still struggling with the damn keys when the door suddenly swings open. you lose your balance, knees buckling like a baby deer, and you're sent teetering forward towards the floor.

you're caught halfway. a strong arm wraps around you, catching you by the waist easily. you don't resist.

katsuki pulls you towards himself until your face is smooshed against his chest. his free hand cradles the back of your head, carefully avoiding the gash from where you must've hurt your head earlier.

"'suki," you murmured against his chest. "i look like shit, don't i?"

"you look like you got into a good fight."

"do you think i won?" you tilt your head to look up at katsuki.

"i know you won," katsuki says easily, confidently. you smile.

"how'd you know?"

katsuki's eyes are soft, brimming with love and pride. it makes you a little shy, but you love it when katsuki looks at you like this. it reminds you of the way katsuki looked at you on your wedding day.

except that this time, you're not walking down the aisle in a beautiful lace gown; you're barely even managing to stand in the doorway, dripping blood onto the carpet.

"you're my wife. of course ya'd win."

idk katsuki just makes me feel like i want to win. like i have to win. like im already winning.

taglist (thank you for your support!!): @anicaaa67 @maddietries @nemisimp @an-na-bella @valeriyaaak @buggie07 @v3n7s @deimosjay @iguanahykhv @zaiban2989 @girls-overflower @notmeduhh @dreamcastgirl99

[yeahxsurexokay13]

ideal weekend, lando norris

summary: while fans stress about the fact that, following their breakup, the actress won't be there to witness the driver's first ever f1 win, y/n gets asked about her ideal weekend off in an interview and accidentally manifests it [actress!reader]

warnings: i think only very bad editing (i tried) and me bringing up yet another footballer i feel affection for for literally no reason

fc: madelyn cline

started this as something completely different from what it ended up being but i think i like it. i'd love it if you let me know what you think tho (((:

y/n.y/l

📍miami

Liked by rudeth and 1.059.326 others

y/n.y/l yet another victim of a @/maxverstappen1 win. had so much fun but i think i'll just stick to acting 🙃🙃🫠 thank you @/redbullracing for having me!!! <333

view all 2.071 comments

username at a red bull event? what happened to once a mclaren girl always a mclaren girl????

username this event was basically work for her ?? you ppl need to stop taking everything so personally omg

username professional SUPER FAST driver, part time actress ❤️ by author

username you're in miami the same week of the miami gp. coincidence? i think not 😌😌

username GORGEOUS GORGEOUS GIRL

redbullracing Glad you had fun Y/n! Maybe we should start considering you for a guest appearance in our garage 😉

mclaren Thanks for the offer, Red Bull! But we've already got dibs on her 😉

username UM I HOPE THIS ISN'T A JOKE ??

username don't play with me like this admin!!

mclaren Don't worry. We won't hold this against you 🧡

y/n.y/l ily guys 🧡🧡🧡

username Ok cool now go finish season 4

username Why are u in Miami shouldn’t u be filming obx 4 😪

y/n.y/l side quest

username not the Y/n x F1 content I was hoping for but at this point I'll take what I can get

maxverstappen1 Next time I'll give you a head start. Enjoyed having you with us, Y/n 🫶

y/n.y/l there will definitely not be a next time but thanks tho!!!👍🏼 always a pleasure seeing you ❤️

username pretty 🩷

username Why is Max literally this🧍🏼‍♂️❤️ by author

landonorris Um what's this?

y/n.y/l 😶 not what it looks like

username seeing you two banter like this makes my heart ache 💔

username i'm never moving on from y/nlando sigh

username OBX S4 WHEN QUEEN

29 April 2024

mclaren added to their story

y/n.y/l

Liked by maxfewtrell and 1.890.345 others

y/n.y/l me and FORMULA 1 RACE WINNER lando norris

view all 3.830 comments

username JUST WHEN I THOUGHT TODAY COULDN'T GET ANY BETTER OMFG

username formula 1 race winner lando norris has a nice ring to it 😉 ❤️ by author

username What a race, and what a win for Lando!!!

username IM LOSING IT YALL I JUST CHECKED OUT OF CURIOSITY AND BRIGHTON ALSO WON TODAY Y/N MANIFESTED HER IDEAL SUNDAY

username minus the relaxing part lol i know for a fact bestie was stressing in that garage

carlossainz55 It's great to see you back at a race! Missed having you around! ❤️

y/n.y/l thank you carlitos ❤️ wish i could've got to see you up there with lando

charles_leclerc ouch ? 🫤

y/n.y/l noooo, i didn't mean you!!! x

maxverstappen1 ouch?

y/n.y/l i did mean you. sorry /:

username are we back in 2022 and i didn't realise?????? not complaining at all tho

mclaren You and FORMULA 1 RACE WINNER Lando Norris look amazing! 🧡 ❤️ by author

username admin definitely ships

username children of divorce rise !!!!!!! ❤️ by author

username u think u're so funny liking this @.y/n.y/n but we're actually hurting we want our mum back!!!

username seeing you celebrate with lando was everything 🥹🥹🥹

username when i tell you i sCREAMED !!!!!!

username Everything in the world has been healed due to this post

oscarpiastri Awesome that you could come watch. Missed you ❤️

y/n.y/l missed you more pastry boy ❤️❤️

username we were robbed from this friendship !!!😪

username can't believe how emotional I am seeing you two together at his big win

francisca.cgomes ❤️❤️❤️ ❤️ by author

username just realised i am not as over y/nlando as i thought i was. in fact i am not over y/nlando at all.

username well seeing you with FORMULA 1 RACE WINNER Lando Norris just hit me right in the feels💔

landonorris Thanks for being there to share the moment with us ❤️ ❤️ by author

landonorris Also I think after this you might now have to come to every race ever

y/n.y/l clearing my schedule as we speak 🫡

username i am so ready to be delusional

05 May 2024

[sweetnans]

The teachers always said that you looked like a couple of grown-ups. The love that they expected from Bakugo to somebody else wasn't like the one that he gave you daily. They were stunned, to say the least. He became someone softer, someone who cared, someone who could stay quiet and just exist, not in loudly way.

The battle has just begun. You did your best trying to evacuate the town that was close to the hospital, and you were tired, strained just like your other classmates, Izuku, Ochaco, and Shoto.

The heroes set up multiple campaign tents to refuge the people and the heroes as well. They didn't have any news about what happened in Jaku but you could guess.

"You okay?" He said sitting beside you. Putting his arm behind your shoulders so you can lean on him.

"I'm tired and still shocked," you answered, looking around you. People running, trying to communicate with the other teams and with their relatives too. It was a mess. "We could've die"

"But we didn't," he shrugged simply. He was like that, the rock that grounded you to the earth when you tended to be emotional. "I'll never let anything happen to you, y'know"

"I know," you whispered, trying to restrain the tears that pricked in your eyes. "It's just... I'm scared that I'll lose you"

"Hah? What do you mean?" He elevated his voice just an octave to prove his points. He wanted to be loud, but the circumstances weren't very propitious.

"I know you, you say a lot that you don't care, but you do, and I'm afraid that you trying to save everyone is going to end up in you being hurt" you whispered, like you were telling a secret to him. "I'm so used to you. Please don't do anything stupid that will end up in you leaving me"

Being in a relationship with Bakugo was more easy than you could believe, but it wasn't a walk in the park either. He didn't do emotions so well, and even if you did, you didn't show them often to not make him uncomfortable. But right now, you were dying to tell him everything and get it off of your chest.

After a long silence, you looked at him. His arm pressed tightly in your back. He was looking to nothing, passed the forest, just staring and thinking. You were everything to him, and it was unfair that both of you had to have this conversation so early in your life, damn you were only seventeen.

"I promise that nothing is going to happen to me or you, I'll always be here to protect you and keep you safe"

He looked directly to your eyes and pulled you tightly to his side. He wanted you to know that he meant it, every word. He would keep you safe and be safe just so you can't suffer.

"I love you, Katsuki," you said tearing up a little.

He rolled his eyes when he saw that little tear spilled from your right eye.

"Yeah, yeah, I love you too, brat." he cleaned the stain from the tear of your face and reached something behind himself. "Got you soup, I bet you haven't eaten"

"Thanks," you said, taking it from his hand.

The silence between the two of you was pretty comfortable. You enjoyed the company of each other more than you could ever expect, the quietness, you wouldn't even imagine it from the loudest of your classmates.

"I can't die," he said out of nothing. You glanced at him with a lifted brow. "Who's going to take care of you? Shitty hair? Fucking Deku? No way, I'm not leaving your side".

You laughed at him while shaking your head, he was something else.

"You still got concrete on your face," you pointed out while taking a spoon of soup.

"Can you believe that a group of old hags tried to take it off with their wet fingers?" He said with disgust all over his face.

"Wet with...

"Saliva" he stated looking at you with big eyes.

"Ew," you said, shrieking with laughter. "Let me do it for you"

You wet your finger, and he let you willingly. After you smudged the concrete out of his face, you sealed it with a loud kiss in his cheek.

"Y'know what I think of PDA," he quirked a brow at you.

"And you know what I think of what you think"

You answered, kissing him all over his face to prove your point. He gave up after a few kisses, kissing you back.

Do not edit or reupload my works elsewhere! All rights reserved.

[riotinyellow]

"Why hasn't philza said anything?"I think tommy is on Will's side since he hasn't made a statement"

You are insufferable treating the ccs like fucking corporate entities

"Where is the statement ? Where is the statement ? Where is the statement ? Where is the statem-"

Shut up

Not everything has to be handled through a grand public disowning.

"Believe all victims" is a valid statement, but it is also one that can clash with people's emotions, believe it or not human relationships are complex as fuck. Most of these content creators were closer to will than shelby. It is natural to want to hear your friend's side even if they are the accused even if you believe the victim. It is natural to be worried you're taking the wrong side. It is natural to wish these accusations were simply not true. Some people are too afraid to burn bridges too soon, I certainly am. Is that "enabling" ? I can't imagine if my best friend got accused of something like this, how I'd feel, or how i would act.

And when the creators did release statements you fuckers accused them of saving face. You know what? I agree with that. These statements weren't necessarily for shelby they were to shut you up. All their support could've happened privately in the way they am sure wish, but no, you had to start bad mouthing people calling them enablers and such (you need to stop using words and watering down their fucking meanings). Look at how people were talking about niki and are talking about tommy.

Just because some ccs can and will be loud and proud (rightfully so) doesn't mean everyone else is loud about that shit. Aimsey is an example they are obviously closer to shelby, so they obviously released their statement much earlier. It makes sense, but you can't be sitting here calling tommy, philza and niki "enablers" because they didn't shout it from rooftops. How many of them want to keep it private ? How many who did say something publicly wanted to keep private but couldn't because of your harassment ?

I can't hold anything against these ccs, and you shouldn't either. None of them bashed shelby or demonised her in any way publicly. and it is all we need to know. If shelby felt unsupported by the lack of some ccs public announcements, that's for her to decide and dm them about it, not you.

[rcmclachlan]

On this week's episode of Things I Think About While Driving, I was having myself a grand ol' time thinking about all the different times and ways Buck could've met Tommy earlier, and the one I kept coming back to was S4xE5.

Like, right after Buck walks out of Maddie's apartment having learned about Daniel...

He drives.

He drives and drives and drives with no actual destination in mind, operating completely on autopilot, for hours. No music, no podcasts, just the rush of wind through all the open windows of the Jeep and the echoing refrain in his head of so they made one.

It would've been an allogeneic transplant. He'd looked it up once when he was watching a 60 Minutes special on Myelodysplastic Syndrome. They would've taken the stem cells from his umbilical cord if the timing was right. Unless they tried it a little bit later, maybe waited a few months before they scraped Daniel's homegrown defense system right out of Buck's bones. He would've been too young to remember the pain and discomfort that came after. He wonders if he cried as a baby more than he would've if he'd been wanted for anything other than the hellfire missiles in his marrow.

And then it didn't work. Defective, right out of the gate. No wonder they've always treated him like a massive disappointment—he is one. He had one job and he couldn't even manage to do that much.

So he drives. He drives and he's furious. He drives and he's inconsolable. He drives and he's sorry. With every street he turns down at random, he moves onto another emotion, and by the time the gas gauge is nudging close to empty and the evening is giving way to night, the only thing he's capable of feeling is tired.

And hunger. He'd only had an apple before he went over to Maddie's.

So he circles back to Glendale Boulevard and decides on the place with a red lion on their sign solely because it doesn't look busy for 8:30pm on a Tuesday. There's even a free space in the little lot next to the building. Thanks, COVID.

It's pretty quiet inside, with a substantial bar set against old wood paneling on the walls, making it feel like an old tavern. He takes a seat at the far end of the bar where the lighting's kind of dim.

Turns out it's a German bar, so he orders a glass of Warsteiner, which he's never had before, and it's got a strong, malty backbone for a lager. The bartender tells him there's a Biergarten in the back if he wants to take his drink outside. 

Buck doesn't want to move from his little corner. It feels safe here, even with his mask off. At least two of the one hundred thousand knots in his back muscles have relaxed since he sat down. He quietly declines the offer, but he does order himself the sausage plate and a glass of Augustiner Maximator once he's done with the Warsteiner, which goes down so good he can't believe it's got an ABV of 7.5%. He orders a second.

He's in the middle of robotically eating a smoked bockwurst he can't taste, thinking so they made one, when the door to the biergarten opens up. A guy walks over to the bar and Buck throws him a cursory glance. Then he looks again. 

The guy is exactly who you'd find on the cover of the LAFD charity calendar: big and beefy, with the kind of high cheekbones that belong on a runway in Milan. Effortlessly handsome. Buck wants to tip his beer toward him, because, respect. He also wants to poke his biceps and ask what his regiment is, if he P90X's or something. Buck isn't a small man by any stretch of the imagination, but this guy looks like he could throw Buck around like a grizzly bear. 

Buck lets himself be distracted by watching the guy lightly tap his fingers against the bar to the beat of whatever 80s song is playing softly over the speakers. He's always loved people watching; it's a great way to get out of his head after tough calls. This guy is a particularly fascinating specimen. There's just something magnetic about him. Buck's known people like that: they draw the eye even if they're not doing anything to warrant attention. Without even being called, the bartender wanders over to the guy, no doubt drawn to whatever invisible light is coming off him. Buck can't hear what they're saying, but then the bartender turns and points right at Buck, who freezes, caught. 

The guy flashes Buck a thumbs up and asks just loud enough to be heard through his face mask, "How was the Warsteiner?"

Swallowing, Buck lifts the empty glass and says, "Uh, g-good. Full-bodied." 

With a thoughtful nod, the guy turns back to the bartender and says something too quiet for Buck to hear, but he figures it out when the bartender goes and comes back with a glass of what is clearly Warsteiner. The guy takes a sip, pauses, and then moves toward Buck, stopping before he gets too close. "Thanks for the recommendation. Hey, Jay, put his next one on my tab."

The bartender—Jay—gives him a thumbs up and goes to the register. Buck, mortified at the thought of being a charity case, of this guy pitying him enough to buy him a beer, opens his mouth to tell Jay he can pay for his own beers, thanks, when the guy holds up a hand to forestall the protest.

"German beer's not usually my thing. I'm more of a craft beer kind of guy, so really, I appreciate the assist. If it makes you feel better, pay it forward." His cheeks curve up, and in the bar lighting Buck can see there are long legs attached to the guy's crow's feet. He clearly has spent his life smiling. Buck would bet this man has never once curled up in the dark on his birthday knowing for a fact his parents weren't going to even text him and was still disappointed when the clock ticked past midnight and he had nothing to show for it. This guy's parents probably had a golden statue of him erected in their front yard.

Buck musters up a smile that feels like one of the little, weak waves that just sort of roll over the shoreline without any fanfare before dissolving back into the sea, and the guy tilts his head.

"Rough day?"

"Rough life," Buck says, utterly pathetic, and feels like he's betrayed all his friends for even saying it. "No, that's—that was incredibly ungrateful. My life isn't—I-I have a good life. I just learned something today about my parents that, uh, clarified a few things for me about our relationship. It... wasn't great."

The guy taps his finger against the bottle of Warsteiner in his hand, staring at Buck with deep consideration, flaying Buck from head to toe without a word. Then he gives a nod that smacks of commiseration and walks around the bar until he's only two chairs away. When the guy opens his mouth and inhales, Buck can already hear what's coming: surely it's not that bad. You should talk it out with them. You're being too hard on them. C'mon, they're your parents, they love you. 

"That sucks," the guy says, simple as anything.

Out of nowhere, heat starts prickling in Buck's nose and the corners of his eyes, and he looks at this guy and the calm, earnest expression on his face, and... yeah. Yeah. It does suck. It sucks so hard and it has for so long, and all his life he's wanted someone to tell him that, to hear him list every injustice and offer a crumb of support without any pretense or judgment. Buck gasps a laugh that sounds more like he's been stabbed, and he opens his mouth to thank the guy for telling him exactly what he needed to hear, but instead what comes out is... everything. The whole story comes out of him like an unraveling firehose, pulling longer and longer the more he talks, stretching from the day he crashed his bike—"But it wasn't my bike, it was his."—to sitting in Maddie's living room and finally learning the truth: that he hadn't been crazy, that something had been wrong his entire life and the something was him.

"They'd made a box for her—full of all these memories and little trinkets and pictures—and I bet you he had one with baseball cards and his first, like, pacifier, and Skittles, and whatever, but when I asked them where mine was, they looked at me like I had three heads, because human junkyards full of scrap metal and defective blood cells don't get baby boxes," he finishes on a shout. Panting like he just sprinted to Santa Monica and back, he finds himself deflating into his folded arms on top of the bar now that he isn't filled to the brim with 29 years worth of bottled-up grievances. This must be what bulldozed graveyards feel like: scraped clean and ready to be filled up again. Buck is surrounded by five empty glasses, a little mountain of twisted-up napkins, and a complete stranger who hasn't said a word since Buck began, and it's as a good place to start again as any.

Buck closes his eyes and stews in embarrassment for about thirty seconds, then turns his head to look at his audience of one. At some point, the guy had gravitated into the chair right next to him and took his mask off, revealing a stupidly handsome face, and his wide-eyed, slack-jawed stare makes Buck want to throw up a little. It may have been the cleansing Buck'd needed, but the poor guy didn't ask to be part of any of it. Buck doesn't know why he told him in the first place. This is the kind of thing he'd hesitate to blurt out to Eddie, never mind a complete stranger, but there had been something so oddly steady and compassionate in the guy's gaze that Buck had felt like he could trust him with anything. It had been so easy to just... talk. And to his credit, the guy had listened to Buck's entire rant—stopping Buck only twice to ask a quiet, clarifying question—without making a face, snorting, rolling his eyes, or getting up and just leaving.

Face warm, Buck shifts in his seat to try and get feeling back into his left ass cheek, then he opens his mouth to apologize for dumping all that on the him instead of at his next session with his fucking therapist.

But the guy just blinks out of his stupor and flags down Jay, who wanders over sedately. He taps the bar counter twice and says, "Yeah, can you just put the rest of his bill on my tab?"

When Buck sits up with an outraged squawk, the world spins a little, and the guy places a gentle but firm hand on his shoulder to steady him. He doesn't take it back right away and Buck doesn't shrug it off. The weight feels good.

"N-No, that wasn't—you can't do that, man," Buck mumbles, face hot. His mouth feels a bit gummy.

"I can and I did," the guy says. "Someone should treat you to dinner for putting up with all that shit for all this time. I don't know your parents from a hole in the ground, but I would happily drop 3,000 pounds of water on their house. Jesus Christ, and I thought my issues with my parents were bad."

"I never should've—"

But the guy shakes his head and tightens his hand on Buck's shoulder. "You absolutely should've, actually. If that had built up any longer, I probably would've seen you literally explode on the 6 o'clock news."

Buck snorts a laugh, rubbing his disbelieving smile against his sleeve. "Believe me, it wouldn't be the first time you saw me on the 6 o'clock news."

The guy gives Buck a curious tilt of his head, so Buck clarifies, "Do you remember a few years back when that kid was mailing bombs to people and he rigged that fire engine to explode? And it fell on that firefighter?" At the guy's slow, wary nod, he continues, "I was the, uh, firefighter."

At that, the guy sits up and his gaze goes so sharp that Buck wants to call Jay over and have him slice up some bratwurst on it. "You're with the 118."

Buck blinks, and then the guy introduces himself... as LAFD firefighter pilot Tommy Kinard, who'd gotten his start at Buck's own damn station. Who knew both Chimney and Hen when they were probies, and who watched Bobby walk in and turn the place into a house Tommy could be proud to be part of. Who had been their air support during the Doheny Park gas leak incident.

"That was you?" Buck glances down at the bar counter to make sure it hadn't cracked when his jaw hit it. "Chimney told us afterwards he'd called in a favor from an old friend."

Tommy grins and jauntily points to himself with his glass. "Except Howie was cashing in on a favor I owed him, which means I only owe him like 973 more now."

Over a round of drinks—another Maximator for Buck and a seltzer with lime for Tommy—Buck tells Tommy about who's at the 118 now and confirms which of "the most batshit insane stories I've heard about you guys" are true. He tells Tommy about the rollercoaster ride that was his recovery from the explosion, and then follows that up with being caught in the tsunami and being struck by lightning. In return, Tommy regales him with army stories, including the time he landed a burning helicopter under enemy fire, and his favorite calls from his time with the 118—the fucking rooster has Buck practically crying laughing into his arms. He also tells Buck about Hen's fearlessness in standing up to their asshole captain who was voted the LAFD's Most Likely To Have Been At The White House On January 6th, and how Chimney saved Tommy's literal life. He tells Buck that without Bobby showing up and making them into a family of sorts, without him being in their corner even when they didn't trust him not to abandon them like all their other captains, Tommy never would've found his way back to the sky.

Then Tommy gleefully drops a pipe bomb into the scant space between them with, "And you never would've joined the 118."

Buck squeezes his eyes shut to try and make his brain stop feeling so swimmy. "W-What? What does that mean?" His tongue is too big for his mouth. His words taste a bit funny, like they're mushy. He hopes Tommy hasn't noticed.

"You said you joined in 2017. That's when I left," Tommy says, the corners of his eyes crinkling. "I'm pretty sure you were the one who took my spot."

Buck untucks one of his arms so he can reach up to touch the hills and valleys running down Tommy's cheeks, then realizes that probably would be rude and tries to play it off like he was going to scratch the back of his own head. All he does is knock over one of his empty glasses. It takes a few clumsy tries before he successfully stands it back up.

"We missed each other," Buck mumbles. He thinks of what it might have been like walking into the station that day, seeing Tommy sitting between Hen and Chimney, smiling wide as he dished up more spaghetti. Maybe he would've turned that warm light on Buck as he passed him the tongs. Maybe Tommy would've shown him the ropes, got him through his first shifts, and even stopped him from stealing the engine for a booty call. Maybe they'd have met up for drinks just like this after their shifts were over, or as a way to distract themselves from bad calls the way Tommy's distracted Buck all night. Maybe they'd have been a two-man unit, and then when Eddie showed up they'd be a tri...something. Buck can't remember what it's called, but it means 'three'. Maybe Tommy would've been every bit as important to Buck as Eddie, Hen, and Chim.

He's hit with the realization that if he doesn't tell Tommy this, he might die, so he garbles out, "You're important. W-Wait, no. I mean, you could've... you were important... I—y'get the gist."

And Tommy must, because Tommy's smart and quick witted and a good listener, and he's looking at Buck fondly, like he might've done if he'd stayed at the 118 and they'd come through fire together, but he's also rolling his lips inward and his cheeks are trembling.

Buck whines, aggravated, because, "Y-You're laughing at me."

Tommy ducks his head and does, in fact, start laughing.

"'s so rude. Don't laugh at me, 's not my fault I'm defective." Buck buries his face in his arms in embarrassment. The cradle of it is so warm and comfortable he just stays there.

"You're not defective, Evan." Even though it sounds like Tommy's suddenly on the other side of the room, Buck can hear the matter-of-factness in the words. He says it like he'd said that sucks. "But you are drunk."

He's not. He's just really tired and his arms make for a great pillow. He also feels heavy and tight, which isn't good for a firefighter. What if he's called onto a massive scene? What if City Hall's on fire and he can't pull the mayor out because he's slow and weirdly full? What if his career as a firefighter is over?

"That's just bloat from all the beer and sausage," Tommy says from even farther away than he'd been a second ago. "Jay, can I settle up? I'm so sorry we kept you this late. You're getting a helluva tip, I promise."

His name's not Jay. It's Buck. But he'd introduced himself as Evan and... forgot to tell Tommy he goes by something else. But he likes that Tommy doesn't know that, because when Tommy says 'Evan' it sounds like how 'Buck' feels. He wants Tommy to keep 'Evan' in the warmth of his mouth, like how some alligators carry their young. For them, it's the safest place to be.

Buck wants to tell Tommy about the alligators, because they are super cool and only exist in two places in the whole world. He blinks his eyes open and finds his face pressed to something hard and cool. The bar stool feels a lot softer than it did a second ago. And it's vibrating.

There's a weight on his knee, shaking it gently.

He must've fallen asleep while watching Celebrity Death Match in the TV room again. Mom's going to kill him when she finds out. "Mads, five m're min's."

"Evan, you need to give me a building number."

"Hmmm...?"

"Your apartment building. I've been driving up and down South Spring for ten minutes. You gotta help me out here. What's your building number?"

"Mmm..." Buck rolls his forehead to chase the coolness. It feels so nice against his skin. He could just sink right into it.

"Evan, c'mon. You can do it. Tell me where you live."

"27 P'plar Road," he mumbles. He blinks his eyes open and catches sight of the rush of lights and road ahead, which blend together like they're about to jump into hyperspace. He's not in Hershey. He knows this road. Sighing, he closes his eyes again. "Oh. 's rowing. 409 at th' rowing."

He blinks awake when he suddenly trips over nothing, and he tries to stop himself from falling but there's nothing except the gaping maw of open space. But he doesn't actually go anywhere. Someone's got an arm around his waist. There's a name for that kind of rude awakening. He can't remember it.

"Two more stairs," the person with him mutters in his ear. "I'm begging you, lift up your feet before we both end up in the ER."

That's fine. He has his own bed there.

"Yeah, let's try to get you into the bed you have here first."

Strong hands lower him onto something soft, and he buries his face in sheets that are cool and smell familiar, his entire body smoothing out like the surface of a lake. Something tugs at his foot, and he rolls onto his back and tries to lift his leg to help, but he's comfy and cocooned in the dark. His sneakers get taken off anyway.

"Evan." Tommy's voice hangs in the air, soft and warm and invisible, and his name sounds like it's precious where it sits in Tommy's mouth. He read somewhere that alligators do that. "I'm going to get you some water and then head out. Do you need anything else?"

In the dark, he somehow lost his body, and he can barely see the outline of Tommy, but he can hear him step closer when Buck reaches out for him. When Buck's hand is caught, he's suddenly so aware of himself, of his blood and bones and every nerve trapped under his skin, and arches a little into the feeling with a quiet moan of relief.

Tommy knows about him. He knows Buck's cells are defective and he still bought Buck dinner and spent the night making him feel like he was made correctly from the start.

"D'nt go," he whispers. He's starting to float away, and he tugs on the hand holding his, trying to bring that steadfast presence on top of him, use it to keep him here. "Stay."

"I absolutely can't do that," Tommy murmurs. His thumb strokes over Buck's palm and it feels like he's dragging his tongue along the length of a nerve. Buck gasps. Something pulls tight and sweet between his legs, and he tilts his head back on the pillow, lips parting so he can suck in air desperately. So he's ready.

"Kiss me," he breathes.

He wants it so bad he almost gags. He wants all that weight and strength to hang over him like a bough, keeping him together, feeding his body what it's screaming for. He inhales deeply and the smell of indelible man fills his nose and the back of his throat, along with the faint hint of smoke and something sharp like snow. He wants a mouth on his. He wants strong, sure hands to run over his ribs. He wants to say I'm full of broken cells and I need you to fill me up with something better, but he's breathing too hard and the words keep blowing out of order. His legs slide open and the sound of them moving on the sheets is deafening. He's so hot, and so hungry. He thinks he's hard. He thinks he's dying.

The hand in his squeezes gently, but then it lets go.

Without it, Buck's going to dissolve. He's going to disappear. He squeezes his burning, wet eyes shut and pulls in a breath that is all wheeze, every part of him a live wire, unsteady and shivering and thwarted. So they made one.

"No. No," Buck sobs. "Y're just like them. You don't want me—no one... why. 's not fair."

The bed suddenly dips right next to Buck's thigh, right on the edge, and the hot press of a thumb against his chin stops him from howling his sorrow and disappointment. When it slides up and just barely brushes against his bottom lip, his mouth falls open. Yes. Yes.

"I'll tell you what." It's whispered so closely that Buck thinks he can feel the wash of breath over his tongue. "You remember any of this tomorrow? Call me, and I'll kiss you as much as you want. I'll kiss the idea you're unwanted right out of you."

Buck exhales in utter relief and sinks into the comfort of the bed as the weight next to him lifts away. He's going to do that. He's going to call and then let Tommy kiss him until he forgets he was ever unloved. But persistence pays off, so he tries one more time, even though he's suddenly so tired he can barely get the word out. "Stay."

"Sleep well, Evan."

+

When Buck wakes up, he immediately wants to crawl into a hole and die. His mouth tastes like there's roadkill in it and there's an egg beater trying to escape his skull by way of his left eye. Whimpering, he tries to bury his face into the pillow but half of it is wet with drool, so he reaches up and throws the stupid thing on the floor. His mattress is comfy. He can just plant his face there and suffocate, no problem.

He has no idea how he got home last night, which is terrifying. Everything after the third Augustiner is a bit hazy. He was talking to some guy who made him laugh, he knows that much. His mind conjures bits and pieces of his mysterious drinking companion: a wide, white grin; large hands; a voice he can hear the cadence and depth of but can't remember a single word it said. After that, he's got nothing.

It takes a few tries to unstick his tongue from the roof of his mouth and he rolls onto his side to put his back to where the sun is starting to filter through the curtains. The move puts the nightstand right in his line of sight, and when his vision focuses, he pauses.

There's a glass with water on top of it, but it's not the cup he usually chooses. It's one of the textured acrylic ones he picked out when he moved in that he absolutely hates using. Even though they're impossible to break, he feels like he's ten years old when he's forced to drink out of one. All that's missing is a sippy-cup lid.

Although he has to hand it to himself: the acrylic cup was a pretty solid idea, considering he might've knocked a real glass onto the floor sometime in the night and then cut himself when it shattered. Chimney forced Buck to watch Die Hard last year and it was a fun movie, but Buck has no desire to recreate the "shoot the glass" scene.

He slides his face a little closer to the edge of the bed so he can find his phone. It's sitting on the top of the nightstand, plugged in, which is almost as surprising as the acrylic cup. He never remembers to plug his phone in when he's sober, but there it is, charging away. His wallet and keys are also laying next to it. It's such a neat and tidy tableau that, for a second, he thinks he's still asleep and this is one of those dreams where only one or two things is out of place and he spends the entire dream wondering if he's dreaming.

If he were dreaming, though, he wouldn't feel like hard-boiled ass, so someone else had been here and got him squared away. Maybe he called Eddie for a ride home? Buck reaches for his phone and his fingers brush up against the edge of a piece of paper. A receipt? Maybe he took a taxi instead.

Buck squints at it, and he has every intention of grabbing it to look for clues, but he ends up dozing for almost two hours. By the time he wakes up, the sun has invaded every part of the loft, but he doesn't feel so much like he's about to slip this mortal coil. He'll take the wins where he can.

It only takes a minute or two of psyching himself up before he's able to roll into something resembling sitting, and after that he gives himself five minutes to drop his head into his hands and regret his life choices. Once he promises God, the Devil, Zeus, and the purple laser ghost of Prince that he will never drink to such excess again as long as he lives, he finally looks over at the nightstand where his phone is.

It's been set to Do Not Disturb, which is nice. It's not something he ever does, because he's afraid he'll miss something important, and when he turns it off the screen fills with dozens of missed calls and texts from Maddie and Chimney. He takes great pleasure in dismissing all of them. Nothing from his parents, of course. There's also one from Eddie asking if everything's okay because "Chim called me asking if I'd heard from you and he sounds like he's about to start climbing the walls using only his teeth."

It's followed by a text that reads "Bobby says to take your time coming in. What happened?"

He taps open the message to reply when he glances up and sees the receipt on the nightstand. Abandoning his phone in favor of learning just how much he spent on a DD, he learns it wasn't a taxi at all. It's a note written in an unfamiliar hand on a small piece of drafting paper.

Your car is parked at the Red Lion. Jay said it was OK to leave it there because you weren't in any shape to drive.

Underneath that is a phone number, and underneath that is a single line: Remember—as much as you want. But only if you want.

It's signed "TK".

Baffled, Buck brings a fist to his mouth, because he's not sure what else to do, and when his thumbnail presses against his bottom lip, something hot and shivery pops low in his belly. It's how he realizes he's got to pee so bad he's going to wet the bed if he waits any longer.

After he pisses for what feels like an eternity, downs four Advil, showers the sweat and shame off, he stumbles back up the stairs feeling wrung out but definitely more human. Once he's in a pair of clean boxers, he surveys the room.

There was a stranger here last night, but it doesn't look like anything's missing. He checks his wallet, but all his cards and cash are still there. His sneakers were neatly placed against the wall, out of the way where he wouldn't trip on them if he got up during the night. And there's of course his phone, fully charged for once, and the note.

He sits on the edge of his bed and reads the note four more times. Then he looks up the Red Lion's operating hours, but it doesn't open for two more hours.

Which leaves him with the number and As much as you want. But only if you want.

His mind immediately takes a swan dive into the gutter. It's probably not meant to be as sexual as it reads, but... he's not sure how else he's supposed to take it. TK's blocky penmanship reveals nothing.

Maybe after he was done talking to the guy at the bar he met some woman? Maybe she was the one to take him home, although considering how drunk he must've been, it couldn't have been an easy feat. That she didn't help herself to his money and was thoughtful enough to plug his phone in and get him a glass of water really warrants a thank you.

He looks down at the phone number.

He grabs his phone—100%, what an absolutely wild concept—and taps in the number, double checking it like four times while his finger hovers over the CALL button like an anvil.

What the hell. He's got nothing left to lose.

He taps CALL and brings the phone to his ear. It takes two rings before someone picks up.

"Hello?"

Not a woman. Buck sits up so straight they could use his spine as an I-beam level.

"Uh, h-hey," he stutters, looking around his room, trying to divine any lingering atoms this person might've left behind. "Um, I think you—I have a note with this number on it and—"

Thankfully, the mysterious "TK" stops Buck before he gets a good ramble going, his voice friendly as he breaks in with, "Evan! Hey. Glad to hear the Maximator couldn't keep you down for long. How're you feeling this morning?"

Buck's entire body goes warm as it relaxes from its ramrod-straight pose. "I, uh, a little confused. I don't remember getting home, but I guess I have you to thank for that." Buck pauses. "So, thank you."

"Well, you didn't make it easy." TK laughs, and it shivers down the line right into Buck's ear canal. "It took me a lot longer to figure out you were saying 'Rowan' and not 'rowing' than I care to admit, but we got there in the end. Your place is insane. Did you get a signing bonus when you joined the 118 or something?"

Buck blinks. An image of Bobby winning a fight against a rooster comes winging out of the back of his mind. "That—that's right. You're a firefighter. Uh, do you really fly with Harbor One or am I making that up?"

"You made me promise four times to give you lessons," TK says warmly. "I had to stop you from slicing your palm open so we could shake on it."

Ducking his head with a helpless chuckle, Buck nods, even though TK can't see him. "Yeah, that, uh, sounds like something I'd do. Sorry."

"Don't be sorry. I'd love to take you up."

He doesn't know how he got lucky enough that the person he made a fool out of himself in front of was one of the chosen few who are able to handle The Full Buck without too much of a fuss, but he's so grateful for it. They're a rare breed.

"Anytime you want, just tell me when."

Buck's gaze immediately shoots to the piece of paper he's still clutching in his other hand, and for no reason he can think of his heart rate picks up. His cheeks start tingling with blossoming warmth.

He curls a little into himself, cupping the phone closer to his mouth. "I-Is that what you meant in your note?"

There's a little pause on the line, and then when TK's voice comes back, it's softer. "No. That's not what I meant."

Buck swallows a mouthful of saliva and asks, just as softly, "What does 'TK' stand for?"

"Tommy Kinard."

Exhaling a shaky breath, Buck's eyes fall closed. He thinks of cool sheets under him, and feeling heavy and safe in the dark. His belly clenches with something like hunger. He bites his bottom lip and then licks it.

"... Evan? You still there?"

He doesn't know why his body feels like it's being pulled in a million different directions, or why the first thing he thought of when Tommy said "Evan" was baby alligators, but he does know this: on the worst day of Buck's life, Tommy Kinard made it easier to bear. He kept Buck company, kept him distracted, and then kept him safe.

I told you not to go, he thinks out of nowhere.

"Look, Evan, it's completely fine, and I promise I won't be offended if you don't want—"

Evan Buckley was born to fix someone else. He has defective cells and has never once been enough for anyone, and that sucks. But he's still here and this life is his whether it was meant to be or not, and he does want.

Buck opens his eyes.

"Hey, so, what are you doing Saturday?"

[dumbkid4ever]

It's Not Your Fault

Kinich x reader! In which:

Your boyfriend comes home from work and the first sentence he told you was "somebody kissed me today."

1,747 words 9,461 characters

It was almost midnight, the time your boyfriend told you he'd come home. Like many other times when he had to work till late, you sat on the couch with a lamp illuminating the book in your hands so that you can tell the letters apart. The plot wasn't particularly interesting, but the characters were relatable and pretty well written.

Just as you were getting to the climax of the story, you heard the sound of the door unlocking. Without hesitation, you put down your book (after placing a bookmark betweent the pages of course) and leaped towards the front entrance to welcome your beloved home. Barely did the door open when you had already thrown yourself at the figure before you.

"Honey! Welcome home," you grinned, nuzzling your cheek into the crook of his neck. Usually he would've greeted you back by now, but all you got was an arm weakly patting against your back. Noticing this, you stepped back to see what was up.

"Kinich? You alright?" you asked worriedly. His face was a few shades paler than you remember, his eyes didn't meet yours and he kept opening and closing his mouth. Something was clearly wrong.

After a while of silence, he seemed to have found his words again. Monotonously, he uttered the following words.

"Somebody kissed me today."

In an instant, it felt as if a cold bucket of water was dumped onto you, rendering you speechless for a moment. However, it wouldn't have mattered if you could speak or not, for he was not done yet.

"I made it clear that I had a lover already, but she didn't listen and while I was occupied with something else she just did it," he explained calmly and shortly. If you had not been with him for so long, you might've misunderstood his calm as apathy, his sparse amount of words as him trying to brush it off as nothing and his unwillingness to look at you as disrespect.

But you had been with him for this long. You knew that rather than being calm, it was him struggling to express his emotions, instead of trying to downplay the situation he was just being extra blunt under stress and it wasn't that he doesn't think you're not important enough to be looked at while talking, he just didn't know how to look at you anymore.

"I- I thought I'd tell you before any misunderstanding happens. I'm pretty sure there were no witnesses but just in case someone tries to tell you anything I wanted to tell you and well I... I..."

The panic he felt was evident to you. It's hard not to see with his eyes frantically darting from furniture to furniture, his hands clenching and unclenching again, his breath going in and out at a faster pace than the one that had the power to lull you to sleep. There came a point where you couldn't bear seeing him like this anymore.

"Kinich," you called out. He stopped every movement, so did his heart for a second. "Kinich, look at me."

Only then did he finally meet your gaze. Vibrant yellows, greens and a bit of orange. How you adored his eyes, even now as his pupils dilated and tears threatening to roll down his pretty face. Slowly, as to not scare him, you opened your arms invitingly.

Immediately he moved into the safety of your embrace, wrapping around you and burying his face into your shoulder. Not long after, you felt his body quiver as soft sniffles sounded next to your ear.

"It's alright. It's not your fault, so don't you worry. It's all gonna be fine," you whispered soothingly, hoping to relieve him of the burden as much as you can, even though you yourself weren't so thrilled to hear about it.

"But I-," he was interrupted by a rather quiet hiccup, a skill he mastered at 5, "I could've stopped it. It would've been so easy."

"Don't put the blame on yourself, you were doing something else, weren't you? She exploited that and did something you have made clear was taboo. You can't be at fault for this."

Although your words made sense to him logically, and he himself already knew this on his way back home, he couldn't convince his feelings that you were speaking the truth. They kept telling him that you were only saying this so that he'd calm down and let his guard down, so that you could leave while he was in a faux sense of safety. The mixture of shame, guilt and fear was crushing him.

He hated everything about the current situation, even the heat radiating off of you. He hated how weak he felt, how his emotions were so overwhelming, how his mind won't just accept the logical truth, how he dared to doubt your words, how he had the audacity to seek comfort in your embrace despite said doubts and what he had done.

Why were you being so lenient, why were you being gentle with him when he had betrayed you? What will be the price for this? Both the betrayal from his side and the leniency you showed meant that he was now indebted to you, by a lot in fact. How will this debt be payed? There was only one possibility in his mind and the thought of it sent whatever was left of his rationale went flying out the window.

The hold he had on you tightened. His fingers dug into the side of your arms, making you wince a bit but you didn't let go of him. Memories flashed before him, terror had his heart in a grip like it's trying to suffocate him and fear flooded his mind, drowning out all thoughts.

"Please, oh please don't..."

He let out a shaky breath.

"Please, don't leave me, I'll do whatever it takes to make up for it but please, I beg of you and I promise I'll be enough, I'll do enough, just please don't go away, I'll be good, really..."

The boy's rambling continued, repeating words like a prayer, but it was so quiet you barely heard him, despite your ear being right beside him. The speed at which the words spilled out of his mouth made the words even more intelligible, but you realized where his mind was at as soon as you understood "leave."

"Hey, hey, no. I'm not gonna leave you, you don't have to pay me anything. One only has to pay when they gain something in return, but you didn't gain anything from that kiss, right?"

Your voice cracked a bit at the end, the thought of Kinich liking the kiss of someone else stinged like a needle. To your slight reassurance, he nodded into your shoulder.

"Then you don't have to pay for anything. See? I'll stay, there's nowhere else I'd want to be more than with you, I'm not going anywhere."

"But I broke our promise and hurt your trust, I should compensate for it, I have to," he continued to argue, as if trying hard to not let you convince him.

"Nonsense, you didn't do anything to me, it was that... person, who did you wrong." As an attempt to ground him back into reality, you tangled your fingers into his hair and rubbed his scalp softly. That always calmed him down, and though this time was no exception, the effect was less than usual.

"The fact that I told you already counts as hurting you. I know you're hurt by this," he retorted, now less hysteric, and you knew that he wasn't all that wrong. But still, you continued talking him out of his worries.

"A misunderstanding would've done more damage to me, telling me right away was the safest option and the one with the least damage potential. You made the choice that has the least cons for me."

Finally, he had nothing to argue with and the room fell still. Talking about pros and cons of choices may seem odd, and you would've found it very odd, had you heard this conversation a few years ago, but throughout your time together you had learnt that this was just the way Kinich was able to receive comfort. He couldn't accept simple, genuine things in relationships without paying something back, that was just what he had learnt from his childhood. Nothing comes without a price, so when someone claims something to be free, he can only face it with suspicion and disbelief.

"I won't leave you, ever. You're the only I love, the only one I trust so much and I know you only have my best interests in mind. Just your existence is enough and what you do for me, well it's more than I could ever hope to receive from a person," you spoke with a hushed tone and stepped away from the hug. The corners of his eyes were reddened and a bit of snot ran down his nose, but he looked as beautiful as ever. Delicately, you took both his hands and entertwined his slender digits in your own.

"There are more reasons to stay with you than I can count on both our fingers, you know? In contrast, I see none why I should leave. Well, aside from Ajaw, he's the only thing tainting my time with you. On the other hand though, I must say, seeing you bicker is quite entertaining," you laughed light-heartedly. To that, he smiled a little.

"Thank you," he murmured and leaned in for a kiss, one you gently returned. It didn't last very long, nor was it particularly passionate, but it expressed everything he wanted to tell you and you understood everything that he said.

"Should we go to sleep now? I'm sure you're tired from all the work. Come on, go get yourself ready for bed, I'll be waiting," you urged him, getting a hum of agreement in return. Content with that, you went to fetch your book, that was still on the couch, and stepped towards your shared bedroom.

Not long after, Kinich entered the room as well, still rubbing his hair with a towel. You were already under the blanket, watching him change into his pajamas and eventually lay down beside you. Wordlessly, he slid his limbs around your midrift and you cradled his head, which was pressed up against your chest. Your legs tangled together until neither of you knew where he started and where you ended. At last you peacefully drifted to sleep, aware that the other is always beside you.

Legit woke up in the middle of the night to write this, knowing full well I had school the next day, all because the idea came to me. Well anyways hope you enjoyed and have a pleasant day or night.

[novemberheart]

{overview} You make a wrong turn once or twice

{warnings} fem reader, chapter story, a/b/o dynamics, poly 141, some emotional angst

Chapter 35 <- Chapter 36 -> Chapter 37

It was strange how something so small could be so violating.

The tracker had been removed in under ten minutes- it had taken longer for the anesthetics to kick in. Now here you were in a hospital observation room with the little wire in your hands.

Dr. Harrelson wanted to keep you for a few more hours to make sure your symptoms evened out and to make sure you didn't have a reaction to the anesthetics.

The sun was up now. You could see it expanding over the ceiling. There was a knock besides your curtain.

“How are you doing, pup?” Dr. Harrelson questioned. The back of his hand rested against your forehead, a small quirk in his lips at your perfect temperature.

“I feel a lot better physically,” you half chuckled. Your eyes darted down to the small wire that was being twirled between your fingers. “Is there any way we can trace it back to someone?” you asked.

“I don't see why not,” he shrugged. “All your alphas have to do is”-

“No alphas,” you interjected. “I've given them enough trouble in my time with them. This is something I need to figure out on my own,” you emphasized.

You've had more than enough time to think. This tracker had been injected into you years ago. It had nothing to do with your pack now. Why should they be involved in it? Or forced to fix the situation? Looking back now it was a blessing you were alone when this happened.

You couldn't cause any more problems.

Just because you were marked doesn't mean you couldn't be thrown to the curb. It was clear they had no qualms about being apart from you. Maybe it was easier for them. They didn't have to worry about you. They didn't have to change their schedule to accommodate you. It could just be the four of them.

Like the good ol’ days.

“Pup?” Dr. Harrelson pressed. You opened your eyes.

“Where do I go to get this looked at?” You asked. He sighed, scratching at his narrow jaw.

“You can send it to a lab,” he said finally. “There’s one on base. You'll need an alpha to sign off on it though,” he explained.

“Any alpha, or just my alpha?”

“Any,” he sighed once more.

“Dr. Harrelson,” you spoke. His honey eyes softened. “Thank you for helping me. I would also like for you to be my primary doctor. If that's alright with you?” you added. His face softened even more.

“Would be my honor. You’ll have to convince your alphas of that though,” he smiled.

“Anais I need a favor,” you murmured hesitantly.

“What happened? You don't sound too good,” she spoke from the other line. You could imagine the crinkle by her eyes as she spoke.

“I was sick and had to go to the doctors. I'm fine now but I found something. I was hoping you and Briggs could help me,” you explained.

“Why didn't you call me earlier?!? Where are you? We’ll be right there,” she growled from the other end.

“Still at the doctors at the entrance of the omega ward. Thank you, Anais,” you breathed.

The pair were there shortly after she hung up. You didn't see Anais’ alpha a lot- he was a busy man. He had a duffle flung over his shoulder and you already knew Anais had planned to stay the night with you. As soon as she got close you wrapped your arms around her, breathing in her honey scent. The two of you walked side by side, Briggs standing opposingly behind you.

“So they pulled this out of your leg?” Briggs started, holding the small wire between his fingertips. You nodded, a pang shooting through your legs at the thought.

“How come it didn't dissolve?” Anais spoke. You honestly hadn't thought to ask that.

“Defected or something,” you guessed.

“You or the wire?” she questioned, making you giggle.

“Probably both,” you sighed.

“You have any idea who could've placed it?” Briggs hummed, his elbows resting on his knees.

“It would've been around the time if first went into omega holding houses or a little before,” you explained.

“I’m sure you would've felt it being injected. What about when you first arrived at the omega holding house? Don’t they do physicals?” Briggs asked.

“They do. But I kept my pants on the whole time. They just do routine stuff like blood pressure, heart rate, check your eyes and ears,” you explained.

“You said a little before,” Anais began. “Could it be someone from your family? Maybe your grandparents? They were the ones that worried about you,” Anais suggested.

You didn't know what to think. It felt more likely that it was someone from one of your omega holding houses. But why would they want to track you? You never stayed at one long enough to get attached to someone.

“Maybe it's just for scientific reasons?” you spoke. Both their eyebrows quirked. “Like how scientists track sea turtles and things like that. Maybe they track a lot of omegas just to see where we end up or how long it takes before we get scooped up by a pack,” you continued.

“Not a shabby idea,” Briggs hummed. “You satisfied with that though?”

“No,” you replied. “That’s why I need you. I want to send it to the lab on base so they can track who it's from. I just need an alpha to sign off on it,” you explained slowly. Briggs held up a hand to stop you.

“This is something your alphas should do for you”-

“I can't go to them with this!” you sputtered. “You two know that I've been a bit of a troublemaker already. The last thing I need is more problems- especially after being marked. They’d give me the boot,” you admitted.

“I’m going to tell you this as not only an alpha but a friend, that's insulting,” Briggs snapped. Your eyes widened, and you could see Anais shiver from next to you. “Nothing is worse to an alpha than their omega not trusting them to take care of them. Not only that, but your betas would throw a fucking fit too,”

“I understand that Briggs, but you don't know the whole situation”-

“Neither do you,” Briggs interrupted. “You seem to forget that your pack are the top dogs around this place. I don't need them comin’ after me,” he breathed.

“They wouldn't do that! Besides, how would they even know?”

“Nothing happens without the 141 knowin’ about it. Wouldn't be surprised if they already knew about your leg,” Briggs spoke. Your heart dropped into your stomach.

That couldn't be true.

They couldn't know everything.

“Alright,” you agreed. “I shouldn't have expected you to do that. I'm sorry. Both of you,” you whispered, shuffling a bit closer to Anais. The energy in the air had made her uncomfortable. Briggs reached out a hand holding the back of her head and pressing a gentle kiss against her forehead to soothe her.

“Why can't you do it?” Anais pressed, looking up at Briggs. His blonde brows furrowed.

“If they found out. They would separate the two of you,” Briggs added. You didn't quite appreciate the way he spoke about your pack. Sure, they could be a bit extreme in some cases, but they were fair.

“They wouldn’t do that,” you assured.

“Say it’s mine!” Anais yelled suddenly. “The wire,” she clarified.

“I don't know about that”-

“You would do that Anais?” you asked.

“Of course,” she chuckled. “You would do that for me too! Remember that one time I knocked over a display case and you said it was you because you knew you wouldn't get in trouble because of who your pack is,” she giggled, causing a smile to grace your face. Both of you turned to Briggs.

“I guess that could work,” he sighed defeatedly.

You couldn't take it anymore.

In four days it would be a month since you’ve heard from your pack. It wasn't right. It wasn't natural.

The bonds you had worked so hard to build were already fraying.

The flat was no longer theirs. All scent of them had been erased from the surface.

You couldn't believe that they had no time to call you.

They had done it before.

What made this time so different?

You were marked.

They already had you where they wanted you. The courting phase was over. They had gotten what they wanted. An obedient omega waiting for them at home. They didn't need to impress you. They didn't need to win you over.

The bonds you had worked so hard to build were already fraying.

A few days ago, in a moment of weakness, you called Laswell.

A few more rings and it’ll go to voicemail.

“What’s wrong, honey?” The sound of her voice made you sob. Well, sob harder than you already had been.

“When are they coming home?” you gasped out, your hand gripping the neck of your shirt. You could get her growl on the other end. Not against you, but for you.

“I’m not sure, honey. They miss you,” she pressed out, her own eyes watering at the pure anguish in your voice.

“That’s not enough,” you sobbed. “Can I hear one of them? Please?” you begged.

“I can't,” she whispered. “They are fine though, sweetheart. They’re doing everything they can to get back home to you. It’s just- It’s never-ending,” was all she could say.

“That’s not enough,” you gasped out, your phone dropping to the floor.

It was exhausting. Constantly teetering between heartbreak and anger.

What If you left?

How long would it take before anyone noticed?

Anais would know immediately. But who would she tell? Would there be anything anyone could do? What was stopping you from walking off of base right now?

The chip behind your ear might make it a bit challenging.

Your chip.

You hadn't thought about that before. Were they checking it? Could they see that you went to the medical center?

If they had enough time to check the app, they had enough time to call you.

Bastards.

What if they did know that you went to the medical center in the middle of the night? No one bothered to check up on you.

Bastards.

You pulled yourself off the floor trudging into your room. You threw on a sweater, a pair of jeans, and your lace-up shoes. You made your hair semi-presentable.

Could you really do this?

Leave the safety of your flat and head out into the world.

You should at least put on some scent blockers.

Your hand gripped the cold metal of the door handle. You had everything you needed. Vernie cuddled up in the backpack on your back. Your phone, keys and a bit of cash and a card your pack had left you with.

All you had to do was open the door.

All you had to do was open the door.

And move your feet.

Which proved to be harder than opening the door.

All you had to do was get onto the elevator.

That part was easy.

All you had to do was leave the building.

That part was hard.

All you had to do was make your way to the entrance of base.

That part was long.

All you had to do was decide if you wanted to go left, right or straight.

You could always turn back around.

No.

To the right was where the city was. It had the bakery. The store. The aquarium. To the left was the beach.

You didn't know what was straight ahead.

Why not find out?

You stayed a little past the treeline, so nobody could see you from the road. You only had to walk around an hour before you were in a completely different area. It was nice. Suburban. It made you feel safe. Vernie padded alongside you, her leash in her mouth.

“How about a little break?” you questioned, looking down at the pup. She paid you no mind too absorbed in the leaves beneath her paws. You stopped at a gas station, quickly putting Vernie back into the backpack. You grabbed some water and a large fountain soda. The two of you sat on the curb, taking in the world around you. While it wasn't entirely glamorous, it was free- and it was yours.

The leaves had nearly finished turning. Just another thing your pack was missing. In the distance you could see some dark clouds rolling in. Maybe you should turn back? You have proven your point.

To turn back now felt like giving up. Giving up on what you weren't quite sure. Yet, the feeling was enough to move you to stand. Just as you were about to continue Vernie turned, beginning to pull you back the way you came.

“Vernie,” you sighed, gently pulling the pup along. She was as stubborn as you, tugging back on the leash. You looked back up at the sky again. “Maybe you're right,” you grumbled, heading back the way you came.

You were halfway there when the rain started to come down. It started off as a drizzle, you picking up the pace to compensate. That didn't matter much.

You were thoroughly soaked. Your sweater the perfect material to soak up any moisture in the air. You were more concerned about Vernie though. She seemed fine. You had flipped the backpack to your front, holding her against you for warmth. The trees provided some protection, but the wind was strong.

“I’m sorry Vern,” you mumbled, pressing a kiss against her head. You had started to shiver now, the temperature dropping as the clouds blocked the sun. You shouldn't have left. You especially shouldn't have wandered out without a raincoat. “Sorry, Vern,” you apologized again. You just had twenty more minutes till you were home. You didn't want to walk through base like this.

You suppose you deserved it.

Tires screeching to a halt caught your attention. You shrunk back, trying your best to conceal yourself against the treeline. You peaked around as the door of the car slammed shut, a very pissed alpha and beta heading your way.

Hi friends! 👋 See you in three days for chapter 36🫣Hope you are liking section 2 so far!

[alotofpockets]

Opposites attract | Katie McCabe x Arsenal!Reader

Where Katie loses her temper during a match and you're on the receiving end of her punch

Woso masterlist | Words: 1.5k

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Arsenal was known for its family dynamic, but even within family’s there were links that didn’t work as well as others. Within Arsenal that was you and Katie, you both worked great with the team, just not always with each other.

The two of you were polar opposites. Katie was outspoken, and fierce. She was often described as an aggressive player, and had a tendency to let her emotions get the best of her on the pitch. You, on the other hand, were more reserved, practical, and strategic. You kept your cool even in the tensest moments. 

Your interactions with each other mostly consisted of professional exchanges, never really meeting outside of football. You of course had many team outings outside of football with the team, but either only one of you attended or you’d stay away from each other at it. The dynamic worked well enough for the team, so everyone just let it be what it was. 

After Katie got taken down for the fourth time against Tottenham, it was to no surprise to you that she got up and shoved the player that fouled her. You roll your eyes as you run over to aid Kim, who was trying to get in between Katie and Ashleigh Neville. The two of them are now yelling at each other and pointing angry fingers. Poor Kim you thought, as you arrived. 

Katie lifts her arm in a punching motion, and you’re quick to grab ahold of her arm and pull it back, “Katie, please calm down.” Katie in all her anger pulls her arm out of your hold only for her elbow to smash into your face. You stumble backwards and instantly reach for your face.

Somehow Katie immediately calms down when she realises that she hurt you. She left Asleigh Neville alone without a second thought and knelt to your side. “Shit, I'm sorry y/n. Are you alright?” You look up at her, “Just piss off, Katie.” She raises her hands and steps aside. The medical team comes to check you out since you were still clutching your face.

“Is it broken?” You ask them as you remove your hand to reveal a bloody nose. The medics get to work on checking it out. Katie steps forward to get to your side, but Steph holds her back “She told you to go away, mate, give her some space.” They worriedly look at your bloody face. “Since when do you care about y/n?” Beth asks when she joins the pair. 

With a furrowed brow Katie turns to Beth, “What are you talking about? I've always cared.” Beth snickers, “Well, maybe you should act on that, cause most people think that the two of you hate each other.”

“It's not broken,” You release a sigh of relief. “But your cheek has already started bruising a little, so I'm afraid you will get a black eye.” You look over to Katie and roll your eyes. All of this over a stupid tackle. You let the medical team help you up, and keep a cloth to your nose as they walk you off the field. 

Since there was already a bit of swelling in your cheek, they thought it was best to get you subbed off, as you hit the 60 minute mark anyways. You’re still annoyed though, cause you definitely could've played the full 90 minutes if Katie had just stayed calm. You watched the rest of the match on the sidelines with an ice pack held on your face. 

Beth’s words lingered on Katie’s mind. Did people really think you hated each other? Did you think she hated you? She was determined to take Beth’s advice and show that she did actually care about you.

You were confused when you heard a knock on your door the next morning, and your confusion grew even more when you realised who was at your door. “Katie, what are you doing here?” 

Katie’s focus was on your face, and the black eye that had fully made its way onto your face. “If you’re just going to keep staring, I’m closing the door.” Your words brought Katie back to reality. “Sorry, I didn’t mean to stare. I am actually here to apologise for hurting you.” She holds up the small bouquet of flowers for you to take. “I know it’s not much, but I wanted to check in to see how you were doing, and tell you how terribly sorry I am for letting things get out of hand, and hurting you in the process.” 

You’re a little stunned by Katie’s apologies, never having expected her to do so, and definitely not in a home visit scenario. “Thank you, Katie. I appreciate it, really.” You take the flowers from her. Before you can say anything else, Katie reaches for something else. “I also got you some breakfast. Beth said you loved this place, but I didn’t know what you liked from their menu, so I got a bunch of stuff. I didn’t think just flowers would be enough.” 

The gigantic bag of food comes into your line of vision and your eyes widen. “That is food for a whole village.” You step to the side and watch Katie expectantly, “Are you not coming in to help me eat this massive bag of food?” 

Katie grins, maybe you didn’t hate her after all. “I’d love to.” She steps inside and follows you to the dinning table where she starts unpacking the various containers. You watch your table get fuller and fuller, “While I appreciate it, you know you didn’t have to do all of this right?” Katie looks up at you with sincere eyes, “I wanted to. I know we tend to have our differences, but I wanted to make sure that you didn’t think I hated you or something.” 

You shake your head instantly, “I never thought you did. We’re just polar opposites in our approaches to things, and sometimes those differences don’t click.” Katie sighs in relief before taking a seat. “That’s good to hear, and yeah we can have quite different approaches, but that doesn’t mean we can’t try to find a way to work better together.” In agreement you nod your head. “I’d like that.”

As you both start eating, the conversation flows more easily than you expected. You and Katie were usually not in a setting like this, but you had expected awkwardness or tension. Neither one was there, you felt comfortable sharing breakfast with the defender. 

Halfway through breakfast you catch Katie staring at your bruise again. “You know staring at it isn’t going to make it heal quicker, right?” Her face instantly turns serious. “I am really sorry about what happened yesterday. I lost my temper and you paid the price. I promise that it won’t happen again.” You smile appreciatively, “Apology accepted. I know you never meant to hurt me, but it did sting a little. Literally.” You eye Katie on the last word of the sentence and the both of you burst out laughing. 

Once you’ve calmed down, Katie turns to you. “Maybe you can teach me your ways of always staying calm out on the pitch?” You nod, “I can definitely do that, but only if you teach me how to stand up for myself more on the pitch. I think we could learn from each other and have more of a middle ground, what do you think?” Katie smiles and nobs, “I like that, it’s a deal.”

While your on pitch behaviours aren’t changed instantly, the team noticed an immediate difference in your and Katie’s relationship off the pitch. During training you actually worked together, and outside of football they saw the two of you in the same places for the first time in a long time. 

Since that apology breakfast, Katie had come over more often. At first it was just to ‘take care of you’ since she was the reason you were injured, though you kept insisting that you were totally fine. Once the bruise was fully healed, Katie couldn’t use the same excuse anymore, but you were also enjoying her presence so you didn’t need a reason.

It surprised you at first, how much you had in common with the defender, but once you set aside your differences, you and Katie grew closer together quickly. 

Then one day after practice Katie approached you. “I know we usually do breakfast, but there is this new restaurant that opened up near my place that I think you would really like. Could I take you there some time, maybe?” Your smile grows, “Are you asking me out on a date?”

Katie nervously looks up at you, “Yes, but it could be as just friends if you’d be more into that.” Your smile grows even bigger, “I never imagined I’d see the day when Katie McCabe would be nervous.” You chuckle lightly as a blush creeps up onto her cheeks. “I would love to go on a date with you.” You place a kiss on her cheek, and then turn and walk away. “Pick me up tonight at 6pm?” Katie smiles, “I’ll be there!”

-----

💗 If you enjoyed this fic, please consider liking, commenting, and reblogging! You can also supporting me by leaving a tip 💗

[sturniqlo]

Wait For You- C.S

summary: Chris leads Y/n on and things don't end well between them. What happens when they cross paths again but she's not ready anymore?

cw: angst, cursing

an: this is a favorite of mine, hope you enjoy:)

masterlist

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"Hey Chris!" Y/n says as Chris opens the front door to let her in. "Hey, Y/n." He gives her a side hug as she enters the house, closing the door during the hug. "Know what you wanna do today?" Chris asks as he leads her up the stairs to enter the kitchen. "Mm, thought we could go shopping? Maybe eat lunch while we're at it?" She leans against the island.

"Sounds good, let me go get changed really quickly." He says as he runs off to his room. Y/n stays in the kitchen, pulling up a chair and scrolls on her phone. If Matt or Nick were here, she would be hanging out with them while she waited for Chris. After less than ten minutes Chris enters the kitchen once again. "Ready?" She turns on the phone and get up. "Let's go."

"Hey! I told you if you wanted fries and you said no." She whines as she sees Chris grab a handful of her fries. "Sharing is caring, pretty sure Paula showed you that." He refers to her mom. "Whatever," She rolls her eyes. "I have something to tell you later." She says, feeling nervous. "Can I know now?" She shakes her head at his question. "Fine, I think I can wait."

"What time do you have to be home to film?" She asks as she puts the car in drive. The triplets had started their youtube channel not that long ago, and they quickly got a following and became popular after graduation which was about a month ago. "In like fifteen minutes." Chris shrugs. "Fifteen? Why didn't you tell me? We're like thirty minutes away." Chris grabs her hand resting on the arm rest. She starts to feel those butterflies in her tummy anytime he touches her. "Wanted to spend more time with you."

As Y/n pulled up to Chris' house. She parks the car and looks at Chris so she can tell him the news. "So," Chris cuts her off. "Y/n, can I tell you something?" Y/n nods. "Sure, anything." Chris sighs before he begins. "I know we've been hanging out a lot lately, and I've noticed that you've seen me more as a friend, but I don't feel the same way. And I'm sorry if I made it seem like I felt the same way, I just didn't want you to feel embarrassed that I wasn't showing the same emotions back." Her heart sinks and her ears start ringing.

"What?" She says in disbelief. "Y/n," He starts again, and tries to grab her hand, but she pulls her hand away. "Chris, no. Are- are you serious? You knew I had feelings for you, so you decided to play along and just mess with my feelings? Do you know how fucked up that is? I- I can't believe this." Her eyes start welling up with tears. "How could you do something like that? You could've just told me when you first noticed and I would've back off. I would've preferred that more than your stupid ass game."

"Y/n it wasn't a game." He sighs, feeling his heart break each time he saw her wipe a tear that he caused. "Get out my car, Chris." She turns to look out at her window, she couldn't even look at him anymore. "Y/n, let's talk about it, please?" Chris pleads, but it doesn't mean anything to her anymore. "Chris, seriously, get out of my car. I can't be around you right now." Her tears are coming down so fast she can barely wipe them as they fall down to her neck, leaving streaks of mascara down her cheeks.

After what feels like hours, she hears Chris unbuckle the seat belt and collect his shopping bags from the floor then opening the car door and getting out. Finally, she looks over at him and sees that his eyes are glossed. "Don't you dare try to contact me or use any of our friends to reach me and don't come to my house. I'm done with you and our friendship." She grabs the car door and slams it. She quickly puts the car in parks and drives off.

As much as Chris wants to chase after her car like a damn dog, he stands frozen in place. His heart aching more by the second, and every second that passes by he wishes his commitment issue hadn't gotten in the way. Now he has lost his best friend.

It must've been a while that he stood there. The sound of tires on the gravel making him look up, only hoping that it's Y/n returning to talk to him. To listen to him. It didn't help that both Matt and Y/n's car were black and almost looked like the same model. He only realized that it was Matt and Nick from the way Matt beeped at him.

"The fuck you standing out here for?" Nick says as he rolls the window down sipping on his Dr.Pepper. "I just fucked up in the worst way possible. I broke her. Fuck." He puts his hands on his eyes and throws his head back and sighs. Nick knew what Chris was talking about. He had told his weeks prior that leading her on wasn't the smartest idea. But, he never listened to him. "Nick, take him inside. I'll park the car and head inside." Nick gets out of the car and picks up Chris' bags off the ground and wraps his arm around Chris' shoulders to take him inside.

"Fuck, Nick. I- I should've listened to you." Nick shushes him. "Hey, we'll talk about it in a bit. Why don't you cool down a bit, okay?"

It took Chris about an hour to calm down and collect his thought before he could tell his brothers what had happened. During the hour of silence, Nick snuck some texts to Y/n even after Chris told him not to. Knowing that she said specifically to not use them to try and contact her. However, Nick was contacting her for himself. After all, she was a friend to all three. Matt just laid back on the couch and put his hands on his forehead. Just thinking about how if she doesn't want to talk to Chris, she doesn't want to talk to all three of them. And also thinking about how he lost a friend.

After telling them everything that happened, Matt didn't hesitate to call his every name in the book. Idiot, Son of a bitch, Dumbass, Stupid, Dickhead. You name it. Matt didn't know any of this was happening on Chris' part. He knew Y/n had a crush on Chris and the way he saw Chris with her, he thought he felt the same way. But, Matt was wrong.

The two boys kept telling him to go to her house. Matt offered to drive him. But, Chris always reminded them of the part where she said to not go to her house. "Okay, how about you just give her a week or two. And then go to her house and talk it out. And during that time, me and Nick will text her to see how she's doing." Matt suggested and Chris liked the idea.

Over the next fourteen days, Chris' daily life consisted of waking up, eating, laying back in bed, scrolling through pictures of himself and Y/n, shower, eat, and sleep. Nick and Matt tried to reach Y/n every other day to not annoy her as much. Nick asked her to hang out a couple of times but she always politely with being busy and getting ready for college. Y/n was the only one out of all four of them to apply to colleges as she wanted to major in marketing. Nick asked her what college she chose but she always left him on read.

The triplets had known that she applied to many colleges, both in-state and out of state. She didn't tell them which ones because she didn't want to get her hopes up if she felt particularly about one school.

On the fourteenth day, Chris decided to head to Y/n's house. In the morning, he walked into Matt's room and asked if he could get a ride more later to Y/n's house. Of course, he said yes. Given the fact that he wants Chris to fix this situation he caused. Then came six o'clock. The sun was unfortunately starting to set. Chris kept stalling whenever Matt came into his room and asked if he was ready. "The sun is going down for fuck sakes. If you don't get your ass in the car in ten minutes i'm not taking you whenever you ask again." He leaves and shuts the door. Chris looked himself in the mirror, his under eye bags had gotten bad. His hair was messy, he hadn't shaved his somewhat of a stubble. He looked a mess.

When Matt was getting fed up in the car he went to turn off the car but he saw Chris come out the house. "I'm nervous." Chris says has he gets in the car, pulling his hood on. "Just- I don't even know what to tell you, honestly."

The fifteen minute car ride was silent the whole way. Chris' leg kept on bouncing and he kept picking at his fingers. "It's your time to shine, buddy." Matt padded his shoulder. Since there was no parking in front of her house, he parked at the beginning of her block. "If she slaps you, you deserved it and I don't blame her. But, whatever she says you have to respect her decision. Good or bad. You really went low with this one." He unlocked and turned off the car. "I'll see you in a bit."

As Chris began to walk to her house, he couldn't get the image of her crying out of his head. He'd never made her cry. He'd only ever seen her cry once when her childhood dog passed away a couple years ago. He saw her car in the driveway and knew she was home. He took a deep breath before going up her stairs. It took him a minute or two before ringing the doorbell and knocking on the door. He waited there for a minute. Chris started to believe that Y/n saw him standing out there from her home cameras and chose not to open the door.

"Respect her decision. Good or bad." He replays Matt's words over and over in his head. He snapped out of his trance as he heard footsteps approaching the door and unlocking it from the inside. As the door opens he's met with Y/n dad, Ryan. Fuck. He thinks. Y/n's dad is really protective of her and he wouldn't be surprised if Ryan just punched him across the face.

"Christopher." He never called him his full name. Always Chris or son. "Hey," He pauses. "Is Y/n home?" Chris says. Ryan furrows his eyebrows in confusion. "No, she's not." Now Chris is confused. "But, her car is here. I'm sorry, I haven't spoken to her since that day." He mentions and her dad hums. "Ah, yes. She told me about that. Just to let you know, I'm not mad at you and neither is Paula, trust me. You two are still young and are learning about love and everything. I know you two will find your way back to each other." His words make Chris' shoulders sink in relief. "But, I have some bad news for you, Son." Here it comes. She doesn't ever want to see him again. Ever. "I don't think she told you did she?" Chris looks at him weird. "About what?"

"She chose her college two days before going last saw her. I'm guessing she never told you when you two last saw eachother." He says the same thing again. "She told me a couple of weeks ago she was thinking of choosing Boston University because she got accepted." Did she leave for college already? Was she currently unpacking her dorm? "Chris, she left for California, she got accepted into UCLA. She's on the plane already." His heart sinks and he feels like can throw up at any moment. "What? Nick- he spoke to her yesterday. He didn't tell me this." Chris says.

"I'm sorry, son. Maybe you can call her when she lands? But, it'll be pretty late. It'll be twelve over there and three am here." Chris sighs. "I- I have to go. I'm sorry about everything, really. I'll see you around." Chris tries to hold back his tears. "Take care of yourself, Chris." He walks down the few steps and power walks to the car.

"She left, Matt." Chris startles Matt as he came out of nowhere. "What?" Matt drops his phone on his lap. "Did you know about this? Did Nick tell you?" He yells. "Chill out! No, I didn't know about this. Nick knows?" Chris gets into the car and pulls out his phone to call Nick. "Where did she leave to?"

"She got accepted into UCLA, she was going to tell me that day and I stopped her from it. Fuck." He tells Matt. "Holy shit."

"Nick, did you know that Y/n left for California and didn't tell us two?" Chris spits out as soon as Nick picks up the phone. "Wait, wait, what?" Nick yells. "I didn't know about this. I know I was texting her but she only mentioned college not what college, holy shit."

A YEAR LATER

It had been a year since Chris had last saw Y/n. Over the first month of not having Y/n by his side, he realized he had actually felt the same way about her. He tried to call her that same night he spoke with her dad but she didn't pick up. Weeks after weeks, all three of them tried to call. She didn't answer anybody. Not even Nick. They were all devastated that she had went no contact with them but they respected her choice. She had her reasons and they didn't question it.

The triplets had moved to LA in hopes of boosting their careers as content creators. But, the thought of Y/n being in the same city as Chris was always in the back of his mind. Any place he went, he always looked for her. Every restaurant, store, party, park. Everywhere. Chris had tried to move on, but he just couldn't.

It wasn't until one day where Nick had went out on his walk and stumbled upon a smoothie shop. He went in curious about the new place that had opened ten minutes from their LA home. Has he waited in line and placed his order, he took a seat on a bench near the window. He heard the chime of the bells that hung over there. As always he looked to see who had walked in. And his eyes almost came out their sockets. It was Y/n.

Although her hair was dyed from black to brown, and she was wearing sun glasses. He recognized her small tattoo she had on her arm, a little star. He stared at her like a hawk. His childhood best friend who he hadn't heard from in a year stood in line in the same smoothie shop ten minutes from his shared home with his brothers.

He wanted to make sure it was actually her. He hoped that she would take her sunglasses off of her face. A couple of seconds later, she rested her glasses on top of her head and he spotted that tiny mole she had near her eye. She went towards the back of the shop and sat down placing her bag on the table taking out her Macbook. When the barista called out his order he grabbed it and sat back down on the bench. Contemplating if he should go up to her.

He sent Matt a quick message. Not sending one to Chris because he know he will check Nicks location and sprint to see Y/n.

nick

you'll NEVER guess who's at the smoothie shop!!!

matt

smoothie shop?

nick

it's Y/N

matt

y/n??? as in y/n, Y/N??

nick

what other y/n do we know? should i go up to her? idk what to do HELP!!

DONT TELL CHRIS

matt

yes go up to her!!

and no i won't tell chris

After sipping on his smoothie and nervously biting his straw. Nick gets the courage to go up to her. "Y/n?" He stand in front of her table. "Nick?" She gasps and smiles. "Oh my god! What are you doing here?" She stands up, he places his smoothie down and gives her a hug. "I live like ten minutes from here!" Nick says. "You guys ended up moving to LA?" She pulls away with a smile on her face. "Yeah! We got here about three months ago." Y/n hugs him one more time. She couldn't believe it was Nick.

"Sit, sit with me. If you're not in a rush, that is." She sits back down and Nick pulls out the chair in front of him. "Not at all." They chat for a while, ignoring that one question Nick is wanting to ask. But eventually he asks. "I don't want to ruin the mood or anything but, what happened? Not with you know who but getting up and leaving all of a sudden?" He says. She sighs, putting her smoothie down. "I was going to tell you guys. I was actually going to tell Chris that night but then you know what happened. I had- It was a spur in the moment, I guess? I wasn't supposed to leave until the end of August. But, I needed time to focus on myself and I just thought to come here and get used to the place I'll be in for a couple of years."

"And I know you guys were probably calling me, but, shit, you won't believe this but my phone got stolen right when I landed here. Some idiot on a bike swiped my phone from my hand when I saw the calls from all three of you. So I had to text my parents from a strangers phone. And I lost all my contacts, my social media passwords and everything." She sighed. "And I didn't memorize anyone's number besides my parents'."

"Oh shit, that would've been my last straw." Nick said. "Trust me, it was. I broke down on the phone with my mom and she actually flew out here the next day while she got me an uber to my hotel." After what feels like hours of catching up. Nick has to leave. "I have to go now." He pouts, looking at the time on his phone. They had been talking for three hours considering that it was now nearing one in the afternoon. "That's fine, here give me your phone, I'll give you my number." He hands her his phone and she goes to look for her contact. She replaces her old phone number with her new one.

"Here, I replaced my old number with my new one." He puts it back in his pocket. "Thanks, I'll text you first thing when I get home. And, is it okay if I told Chris that I ran into you?" He picks up his empty smoothie cup. "Sure, I don't hold anything against him anymore, and honesty I've gotten over him and the whole situation. I understand where he was coming from." She also grabs her bag and slings it over her shoulder. Nicks heart breaks a bit for Chris but understands where Y/n is coming from.

"Oh- well I'm glad you're doing better now. Let's try and plan a hangout soon?" They both walk out the shop together. "Definitely! Well, I'm going this way." She points to the right. "And I'm going that way." Nick points to the left. "I'll keep in touch." Y/n leans in for one more hug. "Me too. See you soon."

Nick had a pep in his step as he walked back home. He kept replaying his conversation with Y/n. He just couldn't belive she was back in his life. When he stepped foot inside the house. He saw Chris on the couch. "Where were you? I thought you went on a walk?" Chris asks. "I bumped into someone." For a second, Y/n crossed over Chris' mind. But that would be impossible, right? "Oh? Who?" He turns his phone off. "Y/n," Chris' heart starts to beat fast. "Y/n? As in Y/n, Y/n?" He had the same reaction Matt did. "Yes, I ran into her at a smoothie shop and I hung out with her for a couple of hours." Chris couldn't believe it.

"Was- was she okay? Did she say anything about me? Does she hate me? Does she look different?" Chris rambled. "Chill, Chris. I'll tell you everything, but what she said about you. I think you have to hear it from her not me." Nick was right. Close to the living room, Matt had heard Nick's voice and hopped out of his bed. "Nick! How was it? Does she hate us?" Matt asks. "No, she doesn't hate us." Chris is confused. "Matt you knew?"

"Yes, but he told me not to tell you. Knowing you'd track him and show up in front of them." He explained. Chris agreed. He knew he would've made a fool of himself. "Did you get her number?" Nick nods. "We're going to plan something to hand out. I'll ask if she wants to hang out with all three of us."

Two weeks had passed since Nick ran into Y/n, they've texted everyday and gotten used to their old habits of before a year ago. Nick tried to hang out with her the week after they ran into each other but she had a busy schedule with her classes, exams, and her paid internship. But, she had a free day this next week, which is today.

She pulled up in front of the triplets house and knocked on the door waiting for an answer. A couple of seconds passed by and she heard loud footsteps coming. The door opened and revealed Matt. "Matt!" She smiles, pulling him into a hug. "Y/n! Oh my god! I missed you." He hugs her tightly. Pulling away, he moves from the door to let her in. "Nice place." She compliments as she enters the living room area. "Thanks." They both catch up a bit, her telling him everything that had happened a year ago.

"Where's everyone?" She asks. "I think they're showering, I know Nick was in there for a while." He says. Still, he can't believe Y/n is right in front of him. After a couple of minutes, Matt hears his phone ring from his room. "Shit, I'll be back."

Y/n sits in their kitchen alone, on her phone when she hears someone coming up the stairs. She looks to her left and sees Chris. Chris also sees her and freezes. Her hair is brown is the first thing he notices before he notices the smile on her face. "Hey, Chris." She stands up, Chris walking towards her. "Y/n, I- I can't believe you're actually here. Oh my gosh." He automatically pulls her into a hug.

"How- how've you been?" He asks as he pulls away, looking into her eyes. "I've been good. My internship has been kicking my ass, but the pay is too good to quit. And school is school. How about you? How have you been?" She asks. "I've been good, yeah. We've been filming a lot. I came out with a clothing brand called Fresh Love. That's been exciting." She gasps. "Really? That's so cool, I'll have to see it."

They both stare at each other, still can't believe that they're talking again. "Y/n!" Nick breaks their silent moment. Chris turns around and clears his throat. "Hey, Nick." Matt eventually comes back from his phone call and all four of them catch up for about an hour. They then decide to go to a restaurant for lunch. As they go downstairs towards the garage Y/n speaks as Chris quickly goes back up to the kitchen to grab something. "Do you mind if I use the bathroom?" Nick and Matt nod. "You can use Chris' it's in his room." Nick points to the closed door. "We'll be in the car."

Y/n opens the door and sees Chris' room. He doesn't have much. But, she spots a framed picture of herself and Chris from their graduation placed on his nightstand. She quickly spots the bathroom and enters, closing the door behind her. Chris comes down the stairs and sees that his room door is open and is confused. Suddenly he hears his bathroom door opening and closing. He peeps inside and sees Y/n walk out from there, startling her. "Oh! You scared me. Sorry, Nick said I could use your restroom." She says. "It's fine. Hey, can I talk to you real quick?"

She nods. "I know I was a dick last year with everything that went down. And- and I had a lot of time to process everything that we went through and I realized that I had feelings for you all along. My commitment issue got in the way, and I hate that they did." Her heart breaks a bit. "Chris, I'm sorry but, I'm not ready for a relationship anymore. I also had a lot of this to process everything and I realized that I needed to focus on myself more and start fresh. Which is why I wanted to eventually tell you that I just wanted to be friends for now. And just see where we end up in a couple of months." Chris' chest pangs. Respect her decision, respect her decision. Matt's voice echos in his head. "O- Oh. Yeah, that's totally fine. i respect your decision, and I see where you're coming from, But, I just want to let you know that I'm in all the way and I'll always wait for you, okay?" He smiles. "Okay." She smiles, a tear slipping from her eye. But Chris quickly wipes it off from her.

"I'll always wait for you."

[rationaliity]

voicelines about you | various ( i. )

the men's voiceline about you ! next will do a part of the women they're short because i wanted them to sound legit, which is why i did so many !! hope you enjoy anyways <33 this is all purely self indulgent because ill be real with you im not feeling very daijoubou rn

— DR. RATIO

about you : an incomprehensible yet enticing mess in the body of a person. i don't understand their way of thinking at all, and yet, it almost feels as if they understand me in a way few do. peculiar.

chat: his relationship with you : ..relationship is hardly the word i would use to describe our acquaintance. however, i suppose they are not completely inept, unlike many i have had the misfortune of coming across in my time.

added to team with you : take care of yourself. should i have to step in, i will do so to prevent some unfortunate happenstances.

— WELT YANG

about you : potentially one of the kindest individuals i have had the pleasure to be introduced to in my time of travelling the cosmos. a gentle soul like none other. they light up the world around them.

chat: his relationship with you : spending time with them has become a daily necessity for me. i find myself beginning to nag at the others when i have not spent enough time with them. march often asks me about them before anything else.

added to team with you : i appreciate your vitality, but try to take breaks whenever necessary.

— AVENTURINE

about you : quite the enigma, that one. before i even realized it, they had snuck their way into my heart. perhaps they were betting that i wouldn't notice, and perhaps.. it paid off for them.

chat: his relationship with you : they're the chip i hold closest to my chest. no.. a chip is the wrong comparison. they're the one thing i will always hold no matter the stakes of the bet. having them by my side is more important to me than any risk.

added to team with you : i'm willing to bet that the two of us together will make quite the team.

— ARGENTI

about you : the moment our eyes met, i knew they were someone of refined elegance, but i was wholly unprepared for the true beauty of their very being.

chat: his relationship with you : i feel the closest to idrila and the eternal beauty that i seek when i am with them. they bring out a fire in me that simply cannot be quenched by any other soul, as if i were a moth to their brilliant flame.

added to team with you : as usual, i find myself captivated by your beauty and grace, my dear.

— BOOTHILL

about you : i don't know another capable of runnin' things how they run things. they got my respect. well, much more than just my respect, but that ain't proper to say.

chat: his relationship with you : ain't nothin' like the nice feelin' of knowin' you're loved by someone no matter whatcha look like or what you're capable of. they've been there through it all, the bad, the ugly, and the muddle-fudgin' terrible.

added to team with you : well i'll be the son of a nice lady, if it isn't you ! let me take care of ya, sweetheart.

— BLADE

about you : they are the one clear thing i can see when the mara strikes. no matter how far gone i am, i see them - clear as the many sunsets i have seen. they are where the light meets the dark.

chat: his relationship with you : this eternal purgatory that i have been cursed with feels... less hellish when they are by my side. it is as if, for a moment, my body and my soul forget what i am. i can only believe this is their doing.

added to team with you : death comes to all, but now is not your time.

— DAN HENG

about you : they were persistent in trying to know me for who i was, not who i could've been. they are kind, more so than any other person i have come to meet. they are strong and gentle at the same time.

chat: his relationship with you : march is always telling me that i should be more forthcoming with my emotions, but they seem to understand me quite well no matter how little i speak up. i.. really appreciate and value their presence in my life.

added to team with you : i will stand by you no matter what comes our way, do not be afraid.

— GALLAGHER

about you : what a riot, they are ! their personality reminds me of the strongest and sweetest drink mixed in one delightful package. it's easy to get addicted if i'm not careful.

chat: his relationship with you : i didn't understand at first why they wanted to hang out with this old dog as long as they did, not that you'll find me complainin' or nothin'. they always seemed entertained by my stories, and i like listenin' to them yap, too.

added to team with you : have a drink, i'll take care of whatever you need me to, just say the word.

— JING YUAN

about you : fascinating, with so many stories to tell, it could keep me even busier than i typically am for hours. although i must say that i enjoy being occupied by them than by work.

chat: his relationship with you : in the middle of the mundane trivialities of life that i have grown so accustomed to with my job title, they bring an air of uniqueness and excitement into every encounter. i find myself eagerly awaiting the times we meet.

added to team with you : i trust you are able to take this on yourself ? if not, well, that's why i am here, no ?

— GEPARD LANDAU

about you : they are more carefree than i am, and while it worries me at times, i find myself drawn to their spirit nonetheless. i think i'm just drawn to those kinds of people, or they are drawn to me.

chat: his relationship with you : sometimes, i feel like i'm nagging at them, even when i don't mean to, but it's because i'm always worried about them. i know they can protect themselves but i wish they would let me do it for them more often.

added to team with you : protecting you feels just as important as protecting belobog. i will do so with my life.

— LUKA

about you : they're probably the only person in belobog who really get my passion. they give their all for everything that they do, and i'm down for it !

chat: his relationship with you : they're really good at both getting me fired up and a little more mellow, depending on what i need for the moment. they're like my personal hype man / cheer leader, and i'm theirs when they need it ! that's why we work together so well.

added to team with you : this is going to be over like that with the two of us on the same team !

— LUOCHA

about you : they are wiser than they let on, it's hard to fool them or pull the wool over their eyes. even when i think i've kept a secret close, they've long since figured me out.

chat: his relationship with you : they help me see things that i would otherwise miss on my own, broadening my horizons when i need more depth brought to me. i'm grateful for their intuition and their knowledge on the world around us.

added to team with you : combat may not be my forte, but should you need assistance, i will be at your side.

— SUNDAY

about you : they are the embodiment of the feeling of the sun on your skin for the first time, warming your soul as well. they are gentle, and pick up where i lack.

chat: his relationship with you : i do not believe i am deserving of one quite like them, but i have a hard time letting them go nonetheless. they deserve more than i can give, but that doesn't stop me from trying regardless.

added to team with you : whoever dares to lay a finger on you will be met with swift and strict punishment.

— SAMPO KOSKI

about you : a person of many talents, much like myself, although they're charging significantly less for their expertise - free. i keep saying they should, but they're adamant about being kind.

chat: his relationship with you : my partnership with them could be best described as, er, jointly profitable. i provide my excellent services, and they grace me with their presence and their wits and.. maybe i am getting the better end of this deal.

added to team with you : it's your best pal, sampo koski, at your service ! aren't you glad i'm here ?