#i go through phases of insane progress

[despite-everything]

i will say this. despite whatever the fuck is going on in my brain, my setlists for my radio show are just getting better and better every week.

[am-i-the-asshole-official]

WIBTA for suggesting my girlfriend eats less?

(🫠 so i can find it later)

I know immediately it sounds insane but please I need advice. Also sorry it’s so long this is a sensitive topic and I want to treat it as such.

So my (24F) girlfriend (22F) has been trying to lose weight for about 9 months now. I let her offer up what info she wants but never ask because I don’t want to add pressure, and i’ve struggled with an ED and witnessed as my mom has struggled with her weight since I was born so I understand how hard it can be. But my girlfriend is as gorgeous as ever. And I know she’s been as active as possible so Idk why she’s so hard on herself.

My mom eats healthier than anyone I’ve ever known. When I was younger I watched her go through phases with taking on some weird diet that never really worked. She once told me she recognized her real problem is stopping when she’s “full” and not what she eats. She was insecure about that fact because she almost starved as a teenager. I tried to encourage her to accept her body if eating what she wants makes her happy. But she always says she isn’t happy when she’s not eating & only would be if she felt “sexy” again.

I’m starting to see a similar struggle in my love. She asked to go to the gym together, so I bought us a gym membership. We try to get there 3x a week for at least an hour each time. But she’s in her final semester before graduating so we stopped going as much about a month or two ago. She keeps talking about losing weight so her graduation dresses will fit better but I think they fit perfect. I zipped them myself. She never wears dresses or skirts, favoring baggy clothing and streetwear, so I think she’s just not used to the sensation of a form-fitting dress.

She joined a coed soccer team that would meet weekly for a month. I went to her games, she goes hard. She’s also started going for runs twice a week after work with a coworker. They did 3 miles one day! That’s still 3 days a week she’s been working out, plus the occasional day or two every other week we manage to get out to the gym.

She has taken to blaming me for us not going to the gym, not directly but will whine at me with a pointed tone, as if begging me to go to the gym after she told me we couldn’t go. I try to ignore it since I know she’s having a hard time and mostly venting. But if I agree and offer to drive us, she always has too much homework. Even if she’s been sitting on tiktok for an hour.

I do all the cooking for us. After she complained about not making progress I started serving us both smaller portions. Now she gets seconds after meals and will complain about being snackish or wanting a sweet treat less than 30 minutes after we’ve ate. If I stand firm on no treats (which is rare), she pouts. She refuses to get a treat without me, if I tell her she can go get one if she wants she won’t. If I give in, then later I feel guilty like I enabled her. And she’ll guilt trip me for it too. And then she’s unhappy about not losing any weight again and the cycle continues.

She’s got a broad build and a naturally curvy body. When she talks about being her ideal size/shape again, it’s always in photos of her at 14-17. I keep trying to instill in her that she can get muscular and fit but still might not look like that again because she was a child. She dismisses me every time and will compare her body to mine since we’re the same height, but I have different genetics and an overactive metabolism.

She’s active, healthy, muscular, and is maybe 30 lbs over the BMI for her height and age. I don’t believe in the BMI, just stating for reference reasons. Some of that “overweight” is definitely likely muscle since she said she gained weight after we first started going to the gym. She would not believe me when I said you gain muscle before you lose fat, even though she’s learned this in her major. In my eyes to have the kind of toning that she wants— and that athletes her shape have— she probably only needs to lose like 10-15 lbs. You can see the line of musculature on her thighs as she is. She eats way healthier than most college students because she’s a medical major and really cares about body health. I think a lot of her desire to lose weight comes from the athleticism of the PT’s she works with.

She continues to nitpick at her other behaviors (i.e. having a yasso icecream twice a week) that are far less “harmful” to her goals than overeating. But I fear it will cause a rift in our relationship if I try to suggest that to her.

I want to help her on her journey and the way she blames me makes me feel like I need to do more to help, but the only thing I can think to suggest is something I would never recommend on my own, let alone to my girlfriend who I think is beautiful as is. I don’t want her to think by me suggesting smaller portions that I have a problem with her perceived lack of progress. I only have a problem with being treated like it’s my fault she isn’t losing weight. When I tell her she looks amazing as she is she just tells me I’m biased because I love her.

I don’t feel it’s my place but Idk what else to do. So WIBTA if I told her that she should try to eat smaller portions rather than dieting since she’s already physically active and eats healthy?

[crimsonbubble]

2024 has been a jam-packed year of events. I've found myself and lost myself so many times this year, But honestly, those moments led me to this moment—right here, right now. After not writing anything for so long, I found my spark for writing again this year. I’ve gone through god fucking knows how many hyper fixations this year alone. I got back into kpop this year as well; after taking a bit of a hiatus from it for a year or two.

Looking at my tumblr archive is insane. And I think some of you would enjoy seeing the progression into brain rot. So, here we go!

January starts with a continuation of my mortal kombat phase. Seeing the amount of fics I wrote for this media is insane. My 2023 kinktober compared to my 2024 one is a stark contrast. There may also be some COD stuff sprinkled in there as well and honestly, that makes me want to rip my eyes out.

February is still part of the mortal kombat train with some love and deepspace stuff placed here and there. It’s still mainly mortal kombat because that fixation had a very strong chokehold on me.

March is still part of the mortal kombat stuff but with resident evil stuff thrown into the mix too bc re4rm came out. Hints of genshin stuff too. Oh and milkman. March had a lot of little bits and pieces thrown at it. This just shows how versatile my taste in characters is (no, it’s not. Im basic more often than not).

April, aka my birthday month!! Anyways more mortal kombat. Oh yeah, boops were a thing for a day. Ooh, more milkman stuff too.

May was where the clusterfuck of fixations came together. Early May was still mortal kombat, some spiderverse stuff thrown in there as well, some stuff about Midas from fortnite too, some jjk fics and such, etc. Now… May 6th was my first official reblog of ateez content after coming back from my kpop hiatus. It was actually the ‘boyfriend texts w/ jeong yunho’ from @beenbaanbuun !! Then slowly I started reblogging more ateez stuff, both from other writers and my older posts as well. The rest of the month was full of ateez fics and whatnot.

*Side note; May 12th was the start of my return to ateez writing with ‘sweet as sin w/ yunho’

June was filled with only ateez posts and reblogs. By this time I was on summer break so I had a lot of time to myself. A lot of horny reblogs and shitposts.

July has significantly more reblogs and posts than other months bc I’m pretty sure I was really getting back into ateez and stuff and the brain rot was getting worse by the day. Still contains mostly shitposts.

August was when the dilf hongjoong brain rot was in full effect. I also posted some pretty good fics this month too. Such as;

Tempted w/ hongjoong

Helplessly yours w/ san

Head full of stars w/ hongjoong

Blue screen w/ seonghwa

More than money w/ san

Snow kiss w/ hongjoong

Bared teeth w/ hongjoong

Studio rehearsal w/ topaz

A little older w/ hongjoong

Scorched tangerines w/ hongjoong

Candied thorns w/ hongjoong

Guns and tiaras w/ hongjoong

Bitter toppings w/ hongjoong

Pretty boys w/ hongsan

Sweet dressings w/ hongjoong

Pillow covers w/ hongjoong

Blue ribbons w/ hongjoong

The dilf hongjoong brainrot still has not subsided and it has now become a part of me.

September was more reblogs, more shitposts and whatnot. This month includes some fics like;

Video game lover w/ yunho

Shameless kisses w/ hongjoong

Heartbeats and humiliation w/ hongjoong

My comfort is you w/ jongho

Cherry red w/ hongjoong

Rings of temptation w/ mingi

Stitching desire w/ hongjoong

Claiming ground w/ vamp matz

Pull of passion w/ wooyoung

Dilf mingi blurb

Oh and then the suits brainrot came in (still haven't finished the show btw). Plus getting ready for kinktober.

October was kinktober month and let me tell you I loved writing these fics. You can find my complete kinktober list here!! Dilf joong is still keeping me occupied and the fixation is now slightly worse. Oh yeah, silent hill 2 remake came out around this time so I wrote some fics for that too. Pyramid head made a short-lived comeback on my blog with the remake as well as reading some kinktober fics of him too.

November was shitposts upon shitposts. So many horny postings it’s insane. IOMT comeback happened and wreaked havoc across social media platforms. Tumblr atinys were in shambles I can tell you that much.

December was still more horny postings and reblogs. If there’s one thing im good at, it’s reblogging and reposting shit at ungodly hours.

But overall, this year was full of memories. I got to interact with so many amazing writers and readers this year. There were a lot of anons that I got to interact with. I just can’t get over being able to connect with so many wonderful people. I want to say a thank you to everyone who followed me and stayed with me even through the chaos.

To my moots, followers and anyone else who views this post, Happy New Year and I wish all the best for you!!

@hwamphwamp @shinyj3lly @wisejudgedragonhairdo @cookies-n-joong @yun-fangz @autieofthevalley @sugarnspice630 @pirateprincessblog @bombuni @everyonewooeverywhere @kitten4sannie @miyaluvvsyou @linearities

[loquarocoeur]

Hi Alex,

Just so you know we miss you 🥰

(Can you PLEASE give us a hint of what you're working on )

👨‍❤️‍💋‍👨

I'm going to be honest, I've been insanely busy the last few weeks in every aspect of life that you can possibly imagine, so I haven't managed much writing at all, but I've also kind of hit that limbo phase again rn where I have too many wips that are all equally dear to me and I'm cycling through them all week writing 200 words here, editing a little there, giggling as I reread there, and ultimately making no significant progress with a specific one, which is very fun but obviously not great news for you guys lol

In the interest of transparency I suppose I'll also admit that I started the vegas fic, but it's kind of just not working atm and I have no idea if I should or even want to finish it bcs it also feels like it's been weeks since vegas and so much happened since then that it would be weird to post the vegas fic at this point like just ugh

idk there are just so many things😭

[hardtofindneuro]

hello friends, i am here to follow scoops’ idea, and other writers, in ranking my own fics from least favorite to my absolute favorite. sex-mas isn’t in here because shiv and i co-wrote it, but go check it out!

i’ve also been writing a lot behind the scenes. i have so many wips in progress but im excited to share those with y’all in 2025!! also just so everyone knows, im so shook by how much i wrote this year?? didn’t i take a break? like multiple breaks? how did i write 20 fics, plus literally 19 wips? i don’t know. i really don’t. so sorry this is long!!

in last place, 20th: wrong costume. i actually had fun writing this fic! it was just like, a little insane and i was laughing the entire time i wrote it. definitely just a fun little thing i wrote for halloween season while learning to love writing again.

19th: a new meaning to halloween. this was cute! i had fun writing this one too, but it was just a short thing i ended up throwing together for halloween again. i don’t dislike it at all, actually i really like it, but i wrote so many fics this year that were very meaningful to me so that’s why this is at the caboose. dnf mpreg and gender reveals are always fun to write though.

18th: teach me. listen, i know a lot of people loved this fic and it has a special place in my heart, but it’s not my favorite. i was pushing myself to write it and post it while going through some stuff, and my writing has changed a lot since then. this fic was based on a real life excel sheet shiver shared with me that she was sending tinder men, btw. yes, you read that correctly. shiver canon.

17th: take control. this was just fun to write inspired by dnf being in minecraft lol. this was the first time since like, january, that i wrote smut and it wasn’t so extremely painful. it was finally fun again to write it and i wasn’t having to push myself to do it.

16th: gift a kiss. dream’s birthday fic. i wrote this super last minute but it was still really fun to write!

15th: first times. another one i liked writing, inspired by the hurricane. i wrote this so fast it’s a little ridiculous tbh but i like the final version i posted. i loved watching dream’s hurricane stream lol

14th: same day, different george. this was cute and i enjoyed writing something for the little anniversary. can’t believe george has been in florida this long already!

13th: fear. this fic has a special place in my heart. it was personal in a way that most things aren’t for me, and i was terrified to post it so i kept it off twitter & whatnot but im proud of how it came out in the end.

12th: life is a hardship. another one that was really personal and close to the heart. learning a lot about self care and love this year, and i know these types of fics aren’t everyone’s cup of tea, but those who do like them seem to relate and find comfort in them which means a lot.

11th: it’s just hair. idk why i enjoyed this one so much. i think i just liked writing the dnf dynamic in this one and playing around with the idea of dream’s haircut to cope with the loss of curls, however i do like his hair now lol. it was just a shock before

10th: embrace the differences. this fic was just so out of my comfort zone i can’t believe i even got this idea out of the “idea” phase lol. it was a bit hard for me to finish but once i got into the groove, it was cool to play with it. i almost always write canon divergent so this was completely different and i’d love to try something like it again!

9th: it’s not a wedding. i don’t know why this was so hard to write but this took me so, so long but the end product was something i enjoyed. definitely fun to get started and i was glad to persevere on it, even though i was frustrated at the end.

8th: drowning. i just hold this this fic close to my heart. it was the first thing i wrote in second pov and again, not everyone’s taste, but something about writing in second pov makes it feel more personal to me and it was nice to switch it up. at this point, i was very unmotivated and the pov change made writing something i wanted to do again.

7th: label-less. not tons of aroace representation in fics so i thought it would be nice to give it some rep, especially because we all kind of have different views and experiences with it. i’m pretty open about my sexuality here but this was the first time i really wrote about it and it just kind of felt freeing, and during pride month!

6th: love big, love easy. hurt my heart in the way i love when angst hurts my heart to write. got to bring in old lore and stuff to play around.

5th: football BINGO. this was inspired by a tweet and that tik tok trend going around. top tier excitement and joy when writing this, just complete fluff which isn’t usual for me but i enjoyed this one for sure!

4th: going through the motions. this was the first thing i wrote and posted after all the drama in january, and march. it was also the first thing i really wrote and posted that was so personal, which was terrifying, but everyone was extremely kind to me about it and im proud that i took the risk to post it.

3rd: comeback, baby. literally so much fun to write. i had started this a million years ago and then george’s birthday stream ended up being so dnf insane that i ended up speedrunning the last 10k of it in less than a day. awesome stream and dream is insane for saying he was going to impregnate george. that’s all.

2nd: erase. this fic is just so personal and so different from my usual stuff. it’s not something many people read and that’s totally okay, but the people that did read it seemed to really be impacted by it and that’s all i could ever ask when anyone reads my fics. especially ones like this one.

and at number 1, surprise (not), is love you always. as many of you know, i decided to post this fic after my grandfather passed. this fic means the world to me and i recently just lost my grandma as well. i’m really hard on myself about pretty much everything but im truly proud of this fic. everything about posting this sucked and it really fucked me up, but it was worth the impact it made on others & how proud i am of it.

[glitteringcrab]

Evil Morty's ability of attachment

In Evil Morty's first appearance, my initial reaction was that I found it absolutely hilarious that Evil Rick (who looked kinda cartoonishly evil, at least by Rick standards, what with the scar and the black shirt and the bags under his eyes) also had an "Evil" Morty (also cartoonishly wearing an "eyepatch of evil" lol).

Then as that episode progressed, I realized that Evil Morty is... probably as much of a victim here as the other Mortys.

He didn't just wear a cartoonishly evil eyepatch; he was wearing an eyepatch because Evil Rick had poked his eye out!

He didn't go along with Evil Rick's plan because he, too, is evil; he went along because if he didn't cooperate, then he would be the one strapped on the dome and tortured!

His retort to Morty Prime when asked for help to free all the trapped Mortys cemented that to me. He didn't mock Morty Prime for whishing to escape, he didn't say anything cartoonishly evil. Instead he said: "it would be pointless. Mortys have no chance of defeating a Rick".

His parting expression in undecipherable; you can't really tell if he's just being mean or if he's simply exhausted and miserable by everything he has to do.

And if you go back and watch the very first scene where he assaults other Ricks and Mortys, you see him holding a rifle; one that is nearly as big as he is. One that was made for adult hands, not child hands. He looks like a child soldier in this scene.

All in all, he looked just like a traumatized kid who was thrown into circumstances WAY out of his control and had no option but to cooperate with his tormentor if he wanted to survive. I was even reminded of the older boy in the movie Changeling; that boy had to comply with an insane mass murder who targeted little boys, acting a bit like a bait... because if he didn't cooperate, then he'd get killed as well.

Of course, by the end of the episode, it is apparent that all this was a cleverly designed ruse to induce that exact reaction. Although he looks like a victim, he is the one in control here.

Except... there is a "but".

Sure, Evil Rick didn't poke his eye out. But another Rick messed with it instead in the past.

He was in no danger of getting strapped on the dome... but he was in danger of being paired with a Rick who (like that guy who held Hammer Morty in front of him as a shield while the federation soldiers tried to gun him down) would casually let him get killed.

The rifle he was holding was to promote his own agenda, nobody forced him to hold it... but he had been made a child soldier countless times in the past.

It turns out the reaction I got was quite close to the truth, just... Evil Rick wasn't the one personally responsible for it.

Which leads to my first point: it seems to me that Evil Morty may have a... continuous... view of other people. As in, all Ricks share responsibility for the abuse, and all Mortys share responsibility for enabling it.

He says to Morty Prime that "There aren't infinite versions of our grandfather, Morty. He's an infinite smear of one shitty old man. And he's attached to us infinitely through his weakness and our forgiveness."

I didn't really know how to read that sentence. How can a person be an infinite smear?

Well... Rick has been saying things in a similar (continuous) vein. For example, when Morty Prime said "My mums are in trouble!" Rick's answer was:

"Those versions of them are."

To Ricks, there are infinite realities. The people are interchangeable. Ricks don't form connections. It doesn't matter if it's this Beth or that Beth. And, apparently (given the Citadel's Morty Market) it doesn't matter if it's this Morty or that Morty. Everyone has infinite versions, and you can pick and choose.

Not only people are interchangeable to Ricks, but universes are. You can skip universe, consequences, everything (A+ metaphor of narcissists' discarding phase).

There aren't infinite Beths: there are infinite versions of Beth. It's okay if you have one more or less.

In the same vein, there aren't infinite Ricks: there are infinite versions of Rick, each leaving their trace in the universe; but all traces are equally shitty. An infinite smear of one shitty old man.

And... infinite Morties. Evil Morty wasn't torturing hundreds of Morties, he was torturing hundreds of versions of Mortys. There were many, many versions that didn't get tortured (I can almost hear Rick saying this)! Don't think about it.

And, while Evil Morty seemed to pick and choose which Rick would survive and which die after he was elected (so he could tell that the Ricks that made fun of him during the debate were different from Cop Rick who did the right thing) he had no qualms about killing every Rick in the citadel when he blew up the CFC... along with every Morty in the citadel. Who he also hates just as much ("you sellout Mortys kill me").

I feel like, despite his hatred of Rick, Evil Morty has actually listened to Ricks' lessons and worldview. Like it was the only thing he was ever taught and has therefore taken it too close at heart... attachments included.

Which leads to my second point. Unmortricken got me thinking... Up until that episode, we didn't really know what kind of life Evil Morty wanted to live outside the Curve. He might have wanted to be the overlord of a Rickless galaxy (booo). Or he might have wanted to get himself adopted by a kind and loving family (awww). But he didn't do either. He built a home for himself in the middle of nowhere (quite literally), with zero companions (the robot butler doesn't count... It is of course, very sad, but at the time I thought it was mostly pragmatic: the robot butler does his chores for him lol). He didn't even get a pet.

And that's kind of the thing... Why not get a puppy or something? Would have been nice. That's quite a low-risk attachment. A puppy loves you unconditionally. No ulterior motive. You can't really get a safer companion for a traumatized lonely boy in the middle of nowhere.

But Evil Morty didn't do this either. And then I thought; if he was moving constantly, switching universe after universe, switching Ricks, switching families... his ability to get attached to anything must have been quite ruined. It's hard to make friends with your classmates, only to move to a parallel dimension where they don't give a shit about you and you have to start all over again. It must be quit devastating to have an emotional and cathartic discussion with your sister only to move to another universe where this much needed heart-to-heart never happened. Or managing to get your mum to accept you as a replacement son, only to move to another house, with another Beth, who knows her real son is dead. Or to get a cat, only to have to leave it behind because the new household doesn't have a cat and therefore you can't take it with you. Or to get a girlfriend, only for Rick to cronerberg said girlfriend by mistake; or get a bunny, only for Rick to shoot it in a fit of pettiness.

(In a similar-ish vein, the only people who we have ever seen being on Evil Morty's side were people he had personally manipulated in one way or another (either by puppeteering them or by tricking them). We haven't seen someone genuinely trying to take his side; using mind control was the only way he could get someone to take care of him. I wouldn't be surprised if he... has learnt not to expect a genuine relationship to ever be an option.)

...I suspect Evil Morty's ability to form attachments has been damaged; if not completely then at least up to a point. I can't figure out any other reason he wouldn't attempt to have SOME sort of companion once free.

I'm leaning towards this ability not being completely damaged; originally I thought he was being a jerk about the second seat in the spaceship, but now I'm tending to believe that his offer for Morty Prime to join him was in fact genuine, and he lied about it being fake only so he could cover this sudden show of vulnerability. Because... if he never intended for Morty Prime to be able to join him, why even offer? I remember being surprised at that moment in the episode, because we had no indication that Evil Morty might have wanted a companion; the idea was absurd. And if he never intended Morty Prime to be able to join him, why admit that Morty Prime's decision was the correct one?

And Morty Prime's rejection might have stung quite a lot, whether the offer was genuine or not! Because he told Morty Prime almost everything; he told him about the Morty Factory, about the Central Finite Curve, showed him the reality of their existence, and gave him the choice between staying with Rick in the citadel (a choice accompanied by (almost) certain death) and escaping with Evil Morty; and Morty Prime still chose Rick. In spite of everything. In spite of all the evidence of Rick's constant abuse.

Up to that point, Evil Morty's attitude in that episode had been quite energetic and determined. He had a lot to say, a lot to explain. As another fan mentioned, he giggled constantly before and after sentences; Rick's C-137 sudden arrival meant he could finally leave that day! He was eager to meet Rick C-137 and get what he needed! And he must have wanted to get all the secrets he knew out of his chest and share them with Morty Prime, who might understand. He, too, has been sick of Rick. He knew what this was about!

And after Morty Prime rejected him, his expression when he entered the spaceship that would take him to freedom, his expression when he was so close to finally achieve the thing he had been working so hard for, and for so long, was this:

That's not the expression of a cool and bored villain successfully doing whatever they had planned all along.

To me he seems defeated and exhausted. Like he was so tired by then he couldn't even feel any exhilaration at his escape.

It was only when he was nearing the rift that he closed his eyes and smiled, and I gotta say that during that scene, as the hole of the rift got larger, I wondered if the plan would even work. Were his calculations correct? Would he physically be able to pass through whatever distortion was awaiting for him, or would it kill him? It didn't seem like this thing (a rift opening in such fashion) had happened before in the past, was he sure it was going to work?

...The way he closed his eyes as the rift was approaching seemed to me like he wasn't sure either, but was embracing whatever came for him next anyway.

It was the incredible spectacle of the rift that finally seemed to manage to shake him out of whatever he was feeling. That was the first moment that he looked like a child... like an awe-struck Morty.

...and it took a while for him to manage to close his mouth lol

ANYWAY where I'm going with this is: I feel like Evil Morty's ability of attachments and healthy relationships has become so skewed, that...

...I'm not sure he will get a happy ending. That kind of trauma at such a young age will not be something that can be easily dealt with. I feel like, if this was a real-case scenario, he'd need years, decades of therapy, constant reassurance and steady relationships, which... I'm not sure he'll be able to get in the three remaining seasons of the series.

There doesn't really seem to be anyone who understands what his mental state is, nor anyone who is capable of approaching him any time soon.

And his theme song is just so sad... Is that the theme song of someone who gets a happy ending?

(I can't get Evil Morty out of my head)

[bornazombiefrommercury]

gorillaz writing since phase 4 or so has been in this feedback loop stage of depicting the characters as fans like to depict them and then fans depicting them that way which leads to flanderization over time. my prediction is in phase 8 an edgier 2d is definitely gonna make a comeback by popular demand. people are also very dissatisfied with noodle's current characterization but it seems like no one actually addresses how they want her to be which unfortunately makes me think she's going to stay the same until this pandering stage stops, if it ever does. so what are people even missing? where's the watsonian interpretation of her that murdoc always gets?

in phase 2 she was highly intelligent, had a dry sense of humor, and was concerned with issues arising in the world surrounding her. these surface level traits have stayed, albeit in a relatively milquetoast way. but there are also unaddressed darker sides of her character. she was very very obsessive, the type of person to go into doom spirals. she would often talk in a vague, conspiritorial way, like what she was seeing was beyond words. russel has been depicted as more paranoid in the later phases which isn't that random or surprising as he's been schizophrenia-coded since phase 2, but in my opinion it makes more sense consistency-wise for noodle to fill this role. perhaps her brooding that started in phase 2 mightve started to weigh on her over time, making her go progressively more and more insane.

her dark sense of intuition is the whole reason she made demon days. it was like she made it in a hurry or what she had bubbling up inside of her was going to make her implode if she didnt find a way to get it out. out of the four of them she seems to be the only one that is the type of artist where she isnt as much in charge of her creation as much as her creation is in charge of her, which adds a balance to the creative flow in the group when 2d and murdoc are mostly ego-driven and russel's approach to music is very technical.

and then of course there is the fact that she was raised as a child super-soldier. in phase 2 her noticing of the darkness in the world was likely in part a projection of the darkness she noticed in herself after her amnesia was cleared. there was the iraq war happening which through demon days she mourned over but war is what she was built for. she would mention a lot how gorillaz had childlike sentiments to it. perhaps it's because she saught out through creativity what she missed as a child: the ability to express yourself freely without any restraints. i can't imagine she's not an unhealthily repressed and militaristically tempered individual well into adulthood.

[ominashii]

'v' ello there! what are aspects about your characters that notably stand out to you specifically? be it something you personally love or whatnot

ohhh boy i haven't gotten to yap about em on here in a WHILE lemme go down the list, this is gonna be long

Omi? They're adorable, and they know it. They look and act very disarming, but they're still very clever, secretive, and mischievous, with a whole separate, more serious side to em. Plus they're really fun to write given they're both illiterate, and can't lie outright. (half-fey) They're just a bundle of fluff and mysteries~

Kiari? She's a (partially) insane, immortal catgirl that loves cats, girls, hunting, and killing. She's brutally honest, extremely sassy, and changes moods at the drop of a hat. She's THE most fun to write for by far. Plus, its interesting to write the perspective of someone who's lived countless years while their mind Was Not Built for it. How have her morals shifted? How much has her sanity eroded? What is she willing to put up with to keep herself entertained? What value does a life have to her? Always thinking about this for her.

Shiri has been on the backburner as of late, but his main appeal is his lack of expressive emotion. He'll make frequent puns and jokes, subtle references, and poke at some tropes, but it's all delivered with the same deadpan tone of voice. Likewise, nothing really phases him much, and his expression rarely changes. It goes a bit deeper, but that's part of what's in progress. He looks cold and badass, but he's kind of a dork. It's great.

Viola I'll go off her previous self (Psionic mage), since her current lore is hard to work with. She's a bookworm through and through, but likes to mess with people sometimes. The most fun for me is her subtleties. She's similarly deadpan as Shiri, but much more snarky when you examine her words. She'll pretend to read out fake articles for an extremely specific problem. She has a second voice underneath her own that sometimes says something different, inducing a headache in the listener. She changes hairstyles often to look cuter, making no mention of it. She appears as a different species to every individual. It's so much fun.

She also has Several alters, but that would be a post of its own.

Juliet, disposable random lobotomy corp employee promoted to full OC status. She's a proper tomboy, mentor/big sister figure, and skilled at what she does, but very carefree. I never had anyone like her before, and she's so much fun! Her dynamic with Pallene is especially cute, but they're both still relatively new.

Mimi. Fluffy space critter. They're as close to my heart as Omi, and have twice as many mysteries. Their design would be one of the standouts here, since they have no mouth. Instead, they communicate telepathically with a slightly broken english (or, canonically, whatever the listener's primary language is), which is really cute~ Then there's their big eyes and ears. They carry all the expression, and its really really fun to draw different emotions with em. Plus, black sclera & white pupils on a friendly lil critter like this is nice! The other standout would be their very inquisitive nature. They don't know anything! They're constantly curious about people and the world around em! And they're always so happy to learn!

I could go on and on, but it'll just turn into describing everyone at length, and putting these thoughts together takes tiiime

[marina-the-witch]

Elden Ring Boss Ranking

Hi everyone!

With Elden Ring being my most replayed and almost most played game over all, I think my opinions on the bosses have definitely solidified enough for me to rank them individually. I will do so in this post.

Seeing as I can only attach 30 images and Elden Ring has a plethora of mini-bosses, I'll only be ranking bosses that reward you with achievements for beating them and ones necessary for story progression. Seeing as Godskin Noble and Duo fall under those criteria, I'll also include the Apostle as I would feel weird leaving it out.

Additionally, I won't be ranking the illusion/nerfed version of bosses and instead just lump them in with the real deal. This applies to Margit, Sewer Mohg, Siofra Ancestor Spirit, Godfrey and Carian Knight Loretta.

Remember that these are only my opinions and you're allowed to agree or disagree however much you want.

Bosses will also be put into a bit of a tiering system through colors. Blue means a boss is almost if not entirely perfect in my opinion and is one of Fromsoft's greatest to date. Purple means I do really enjoy a boss but have a handful of gripes with it that drag it down. Pink means i don't feel strongly about a boss one way or the other, either due to them not really being particularly noteworthy or having both really good and really bad aspects. Green means I don't really enjoy a boss but they have enough redeeming qualities for me to still like them a little bit. Orange means I do genuinely dislike a boss but can't bring myself to hate them. Red means they should be nuked from orbit.

With all that said, let's begin.

#1: God-Devouring Serpent/Rykard, Lord of Blasphemy

Rykard and Radahn fluctuate as my number 1 fairly consistently. While I definitely think Radahn has a better fight, I find the comparison a bit unfair seeing as Rykard is designed to be a gimmick fight. Unlike his predecessors like Storm Lord and Yhorm however, Rykard actually manages to stay challenging despite the game granting you the weapon specifically designed to kill him right away. What really makes Rykard so special for me is everything else. He is by far the most disgusting entity fromsoftware has ever produced in my opinion and I could go on about how much I love his design, lore and presentation for hours. I love everything about this fight, from the insanely memorable voice acting and reveal in phase 2, to the demonic rollercoaster of a theme and the symbolism of the chandeliers in his arena, with this grotesque monstrosity still framing itself a noble king. With a spectacular legacy dungeon to boot, Rykard, for me at least, is easily my favorite boss in Elden Ring.

#2: Starscourge Radahn

While I prefer his siblings in almost every other regard, Radahn for me is easily the most fun boss in the entire game and very consistently switches places with Rykard in my overall ranking like I said. With an immaculate battle theme that really emphasises the spectacle of taking down this fierce demigod, Radahn is a challenging and thrilling fight. While far from the hardest fight in Elden Ring, he can still throw me for a loop, especially as I tend to fight him without summons and a purposefully unupgraded weapon. His attacks are imposing and beautiful to look at while never feeling unfair and no boss better captures the feeling of giving a noble warrior a heroic end.

#3: Mohg, Lord of Blood/Mohg, the Omen

Far more controversial than my previous 2 picks, I can definitely understand why people don't really gel with Mohg. Even I used to not really like him, with Mohg the Omen actually making me almost cry out of frustration the very first time I fought him, as I had not yet gotten used to Elden Ring's delayed attack patterns. However, after fighting the real deal at the end of the game and being perfectly trained to evade his wide sweeps, I knew this boss was something special. Mohg is a thrilling, challenging fight, with an absolutely stunning battle theme that I would confidently call my favorite piece of music in Elden Ring and I could not be happier they made the last minute decision of adding him to the main boss line-up.

#4: Morgott, the Omen King/Margit, the Fell Omen

Much like his brother, Morgott is also an extremely thrilling and exciting fight. What makes him a little inferior to me, is that he's not quite as challenging as I think he should be and a few of his longer combos can feel a bit tacky and excessive. While I definitely see a lot of praise for Morgott as a character, I sometimes feel as though his fight and especially theme aren't really talked about enough though. Morgott is a perfect capper for the midgame of Elden Ring, just like how Margit is a perfect beginning, providing an extremely challenging but learnable fight that prepares the player for what's ahead. He, much like Radahn, is a boss worth nerfing myself for.

#5: Malenia,Blade of Miquella/Goddess of Rot

I feel like my placement of Malenia would be controversial no matter what. Understandably, seeing as she is maybe the single hardest boss in Fromsoftware's catalogue, Malenia is quite divisive and it even took me a couple attempts to finally start liking her. But this latest attempt, where I finally managed to best her without summons, was the one. While I do think Malenia can be really unfair at times, I can't deny that the duel with this master swordstress is a one-of-a-kind encounter. With an absolutely gorgeous theme, Malenia has wormed her way into my heart, despite all the trouble I've gone through while fighting her. My only, and obvious, gripe is that I feel as though her heal-on-hit-ability is a bit excessive and could have been substitued with a larger health pool, as I often found myself having a hard time hitting her when she was only a few hits away from death, when a simple mistake quickly undid a lot of my progress.

#6: Dragonlord Placidusax

Every Souls game needs it secret dragon, and more often then not, these fights end up being some of my favorites in the game and Placidusax is no exception. While I do prefer Midir overall, Placidusax is nothing if not a jaw-dropping spectacle with moves like the thundercloud form and lightning stake nuke. While not particularly hard, Placidusax manages to be fun and challenging regardless due to his robust defenses and high damage output. The only issue I've encountered is that the fight can drag on for a bit, and especially when her health is low, he will start teleporting all over the place, which can be a little annoying. Regardless, Placidusax is an absolute marvel of a boss and fits right in in a game so in love with making its fights cinematic spectacles without the use of cutscenes.

#7: Radagon of the Golden Order

For the purposes of this list, I'll be ranking Radagon and Elden Beast separately, as my opinions on them differ quite a bit. Radagon is an excellent final boss in my opinion, perfectly making use of the core fundamentals of every bosse's kit with a mix of heavy physical hits and ranged incantations. Him being quite challenging is a huge positive for me to, as I often feel as though the final bosses of souls games end up being needlessly easy and almost pathetic for narrative purposes. Additionally, genuinely no final bosse's theme, in any game I've played, has encapsulated the feeling of finality more than his, to the point of literally being called "The Final Battle." Radagon can be a bit unfair at times, but he is the perfect conclusion to your journey as Elden Lord.

#8: Godfrey, First Elden Lord/Hoarah Loux/Lord's Apparition

Godfrey is so effortlessly awesome. With a well telegraphed moveset, kickass presentation in the form of his cutscene and a gorgeous piece of music to accompany his fight, he is one of the most memorable encounters in the game and definitely the most popular boss overall for a good reason. However, I find myself having quite a hard time with him fairly consistently for some reason, which, while not his fault, does obviously impact my enjoyment of his fight overall. That's not too say I dislike it though, as I feel Godfrey's moveset is extremely satisfying to dodge and counter. Hoarah Loux on the other hand.... I don't know really. The fight against Hoarah Loux is too stressful for me to enjoy it long term and I mostly just try to reduce his health as much as I can before this phase triggers. That's not to say it's bad, I just don't enjoy the amount of grabbing going on as a result of Hoarah's very limited moveset. Overall, it doesn't stop me from loving Godfrey though, as Hoarah Loux rarely last very long anyway, and can be quite fun in small doses.

#9: Godrick the Grafted

Godrick is a really entertaining fight. His cutscenes, voice acting and presentation are on point and his mechanics definitely fit for the first shardbearer you'll be fighting on most playthroughs. I, however, often find myself struggling with dodging his moveset and often feel as though my victory is more a result of his fairly weak attack power and health pool. That doesn't mean I don't enjoy Godrick though, as I definitely do. Not only is he a fantastic first boss but I also find it quite fun from a narrative perspective that he's nowhere near as challenging as his.... great uncle? who's guarding his castle. I can't confidently rank him higher unfortunately, since Convergence and Godefroy have taught me that a tanky, high damage Godrick can be quite the piece of work.

#10: Beast Clergyman/Maliketh, the Black Blade

Oh boy, Maliketh. Quite the story with this one. I actually only properly started Elden Ring quite a long while after most of my friends had already beaten it and as such they were all EXTREMELY excited to see my reaction to this guy, especially seeing as his cutscene is a blatant reference to not only my favorite boss in bloodborne, but any game I've ever played, Ludwig. However, their expecations were met with harsh disappointment as Maliketh frustrated me to the point of actual tears and I had to resort to a cheese strategy using the Redmane Flames Ash of War. After giving the game a try or two more though, I've warmed up to Maliketh quite a bit. I do think he can be a little annoying with how mobile he is and don't really like how his fight will often just end up with him stalling and only surviving as long as he does due to you not being able to hit him, especially regarding his tiny health pool. Additionally, I also find Beast Clergyman quite annoying and wish the threshhold for phase 2 was moved up to 90 or 80% max rather than the 70 to 50% it's at currently. However, overall, I do still enjoy Maliketh and think his lore and presentation make up for my many gripes with his fight.

#11: Lichdragon Fortissax

The other major dragon fight of Elden Ring, Fortissax, doesn't hit quite as hard as Placidusax for me unfortunately. Undeniably awesome with his presentation and placed in a real scary arena, Fortissax ends up being quite overwhelming with his combination of deathblight clouds and red lightning. The latter definitely drags the fight down for me quite a bit, as I much prefer Placi's 4 timed strikes with much greater range and damage over Fortissax's constant shower of them. However, while I do have many gripes with this fight, I can't deny the concept of a death-riddled dragon protecting his former best friend is one of the coolest presented by Elden Ring and, lightning aside, Fortissax does show that the ancient dragons are actually really good, whereas every other encounter with them ends up being quite messy due to elevations really messing up their movesets in my eyes.

#12: Loretta, Knight of the Haligtree/Loretta, Carian Knight

In my opinion the MOST underrated boss in the game. Loretta is awesome, with a gorgeous armor set and a super fun take on the already pretty enjoyable Tree Sentinel moveset. Her greatbow spell drops are some of my favorites in the game to boot. Unfortunately, she does blend in a bit with all the other horse bosses (I blame the five-hundred Night's Cavalry) and ends up never being very challenging, but on paper, her moveset is well telegraphed and fun to dodge. My only gripe is that the Carian Phalanx and Glintstone Stars she begins casting when you move away can be a little bit annoying, but overall, Loretta is easily the best miniboss in the game in my opinion.

#13: Dragonkin Soldier of Nokstella

Another boss that I don't really feel gets a good amount of appreciation is the Dragonkin Soldier of Nokstella. Ignoring the one in the Lake of Rot, Dragonkin Soldiers are just really cool to me, both in lore and design, as well as their fight. Not only do you fight this one in what might be my favorite arena in the game visually, it also has a surprising and unique phase transition not seen in any of the other soldiers, with the Nokstella soldier sprouting wings and beginning to cast frozen lightning, which is one of the coolest magic concepts Elden Ring provides in my opinion. My only wish is that the second phase would trigger a lot sooner, as the boss is not very hard and often ends up dying before it gets time to shine.

#14: Rennala, Queen of the Full Moon

While I would agree Rennala is the best sorceror fight Fromsoft has provided thus far, I would not say that's a very difficult title to claim, nor is Rennala anything to write home about. Her first phase is quite simple but it is kind of fun to mow down rows upon rows of the juvenile scholars with a big weapon every now and then. Her second phase is fairly alright too, with Rennala not dishing out a ludicrous amount of damage and having a nice variety of sorceries to cast. A bit like Placidusax, I do sometimes find the fight drags on a bit as she stalls and relies on her summons rather than actually fighting you, but considering how easy she is, it's really no big deal. Of course I can't not mention her gorgeous arena, as it immediately made me think back to Bloodborne's Moonside lake, and anything that reminds me of Bloodborne gets a plus in my book.

#15: Commander Niall

Out of the 2 commander bosses, Niall is definitely the more standout one. Banished Knights suck and I hate them, so I'll try to look at Niall on his own, and I gotta say, I quite like him. His hitboxes can feel a bit over the top but that aside I think he's genuinely a really fun fight, and definitely the hardest miniboss the game has to offer in my opinion. His weapon, while absurd, is quite cool and definitely worth a try for those who want to focus on physical stats but still have the benefits of lightning damage, especially seeing as it scales with dexterity anyway. Niall definitely feels like a good pick to be guarding the last thing you need to enter the Haligtree.

#16: Magmawyrm Makar

While I often find myself annoyed with the other Magma Wyrms and their tendency to do little else besides their magma charge, Makar is quite a fun little miniboss in my opinion. The ruin-strewn precipice is a fairly cool little side area and Makar is a very good capper for it and an even better guardian for the Altus Plateau. His reveal is quite funny, but overall, I can't really say much about this boss, as his fight is just okay across the board. Nothing particularly annoying nor amazing to note, really.

#17: Regal Ancestor Spirit/Ancestor Spirit

The Ancestor Spirits are, in my opinion, mostly noteworthy for their gorgeous music and presentation, but their fights end up being quite lacklustre unfortunately due to a fairly limited movepool. They're not hard at all, with the Regal Spirit's only "challenge" coming from the hard to dodge roll it attains after absorbing a boar's soul and the health regen move it pulls out every now and then. Much like Makar, I can't really say I love, nor hate these two, but the Regal Spirit's aformentioned health regen does make it a bit more bothersome than Makar on occasion. Overall, their beautiful design and music do make them worth experiencing even despite their medicore fight.

#18: Godskin Noble

I found myself actually quite enjoying the Godskin Noble as of late, to the point I'd actually say they're a little overhated. The thrusting attacks feel nice to dodge but even better to block and counter but obviously it's far from perfect. Obviously his roll has gained infamy ever since the game came out and understandably so, but other moves such as its powerful thrust can also be a bit tough to work with. Other than that, Godskin Noble is a perfect example of a boss that is so perfectly alright that i don't have much else to praise it for nor complain about.

#19: Elden Beast

While also being kind of undeserving of all the hatred it receives, Elden Beast is very far from being a fun boss in my opinion. For starters, it is WAY too tanky, with half of its fight feeling like a sisyphean effort of slapping its chest until something finally happens. Additionally, its moveset feels very limited, especially for a final boss. Lastly, and most importantly, it does really bother me that in order to even be able to fight this extremely tanky boss, you have to beat another fairly difficult one beforehand every time, so it becomes a kind of unbearable endurance run in hopes of having enough ressources left to beat this fairly underwhelming boss. Its one redeeming feature comes in form of its truly breathtaking design, but otherwise, I can't say I'm a big fan.

#20: Astel, Naturalborn of the Void

Astel used to be in my Top 5 but he quickly fell out of favor after the Honeymoon phase of "Wow, they added a Bloodborne Great One to the end of my favorite character's quest line" wore off. Astel is, for lack of a better word, annoying. His wide range and tendency to fly above a lot of moves with his thin gangly body make him bothersome to approach and a lot of his attacks, such as waves of darkness, meteorite shower and the gravity ring just feel bad to dodge or get hit by. Astel is another boss whose main merit comes from presentation and design, but unfortunately, his fight is quite weak with very few redeeming qualities in my opinion.

#21: Godskin Apostle

This may be a bit of a hot take, but I've found myself struggling with Godskin Apostle a lot more than Noble, to the point I like it a fair bit less. His twinblade combos can be quite a hassle and he feels much more prolific with his usage of blackflame than the Noble. His blackflame tornado and weapon helicopter are also pretty annoying. Overall, I don't really enjoy the Godskin Apostle's fight, but it feels like more of a personal struggle than the boss actually being bad, hence its ranking.

#22: Mimic Tear

I really don't have much to say about this boss. It's hard to consistently judge as how fun or annoying it is entirely depends on how you approach it. Overall though, I do like the concept and it can be quite funny. Due to its inconsistency and me not really caring for NPC invaders in general though, I'll just put it as the cut-off point for bosses I just genuinely dislike.

#23: Godskin Duo

Godskin Duo isn't good, but it's not as bad as people say either in my opinion. Being made up of two pretty average bosses and especially after the balance patch to duo bosses, the Duo ends up just being a kind of whatever fight that can be a bit annoying sometimes. I really don't have much to say other than that. Guess I will use this spot to say how much I love the Godskin theme though.

#24: Draconic Tree Sentinel

I don't like this guy he looks like burnt chicken and waffles. I don't really have much to say about this guy either. His AoEs and Hitboxes can be real weird and annoying and I hate the horse fireball spam you will be subjected to if you even dare try to heal. He's just kind of a necessary evil, not really worth complaining about.

#25: Fire Giant

By far my least favorite remembrance boss, Fire Giant is everything people say is wrong with fromsoft's plethora of giant bosses. Not only do you just spend the entire time slapping its ankles, Fire Giant also has an absurdly massive health pool, and a boss that wastes your time will always annoy me more than one that gets you with cheap bullshit. While having a fantastic and underrated theme and really cool lore, I really don't enjoy fighting Fire Giant at all due to his large health pool and wide range AoEs.

#26: Elemer of the Briar

I can't stand this guy and I can't stand that there's like 8 of him. I really don't see where this "Elemer is the most underrated boss" idea came from, because I personally think Elmo deserves every bit of hate he gets. My girlfriend put it perfectly when she said "Elemer has a punish for you existing", because it really does feel like he can counter everything you do, no matter if you're healing, jumping, casting or attacking. While it's cool that his sleek sword is the reward for fighting him, I really don't enjoy the battle with Elemer at all.

#27: Leonine Misbegotten

Genuinely how do you make Gael, Dark Souls' greatest boss in my opinion, so fucking unbearable. With a non stop barrage of overly staggering sword swings, Leonine Misbegotten is without fail an insanely annoying fight for me. Its arena is really cool but that is about the only positive I can give it. I already don't like Castle Morne, nor the Grafted Blade and Leonine Misbegotten really doesn't help either of their cases.

#28: Valiant Gargoyles

Like I said before, Godskin Duo isn't as bad as actually say. Valiant Gargoyles, on the other hand, might somehow be worse, despite nobody being able to stand them anyway. I really don't have anything of note to add to the conversation about this god awful fight and writing about these bosses I hate is already draining enough, so I'll just move on.

#29: Red Wolf of Radagon

While I do think from a game design perspective, Valiant Gargoyles and Gideon are worse, Red Wolf frustrates me more than anything else. Not only is it a cheap attempt at making Dark Souls fans rejoice by reusing scrapped content from 3 that's obviously reminiscent of one of the most memorable fights in the first game, Red Wolf is also just really annoying, with its overy long combos and tendency to avoid attacks by jumping around aimlessly. The only saving grace is it's tiny health pool, but that still requires you hit it to begin with, which, unfortunately, isn't always a given. Red Wolf just pisses me off in a way I can't really properly describe but at least it's over quick most of the time.

#30: Sir Gideon Ofnir, the All-Knowing

Not only is Gideon a massive cunt, his boss fight also sucks. Being everything wrong with both NPC invaders and sorceror bosses, Gideon is one unbearable spam sandwich of spells that more than likely will kill you in 2 shots. Gideon has genuinely no redeeming qualities that affect his fight and there is a very good reason everyone uses his admittedly pretty cool monologue to instantly bumrush him the second they pass the fog gate. Gideon's fight really is a huge letdown considering how much of a despicable cunt he is, but I suppose there wasn't really a better way to do it. Regardless, I hate fighting Gideon. It's cheap, annoying, unfair and rewards you with a subpar weapon. If he wasn't mandatory nobody would be fighting this guy.

[paracosmicparadox]

So, I'm falling back into the FFXV kick, and I have decided that I disapprove of how little complex character development Square Enix has given the guys?? Like where is the emotional depth beyond surface-level cutscene angst?? So I took matters into my own hands and have compiled a handy little list of headcanons / expanded canons that I think make sense.

Noctis: Has clinical insomnia and frequent lucid dreams (sorta a given, but bear w me bear w me)

Feels the weight of having to take so much on from such a young age much, much more than he lets on

Loves to argue

Would've been happier if he and Luna stayed as childhood best-buds rather than betrothed fiancés (controversial, ik, but it just didn't seem like he cared that much for her romantically to me?? Like he obviously cared about her, but it seemed like a really strong penpal vibe rather than a "We're-gonna-get-married-and-be-the-next-hotshot-couple" vibe. If you disagree, coolio, I'm not gonna debate w you on this one)

Has a natural sadness to his eyes regardless of what he's feeling

Went through an anime phase (possibly still in his anime phase, idk)

Social anxiety for the win

Severe RBF

Prefers tea over coffee (black tea is best---particularly lavender earl grey)

Can play the cello (practicing tho?? Don't know her)

Writes the most beautiful poetry when The Motivation™ strikes him (usually when he's home sick and half-delirious)

Prompto: Has ADHD and clinical anxiety, but is undiagnosed and doesn't take any meds for either of them.

Is legit like SO SMART, but can never focus, so not many people take any notice

Wears contact lenses (he had glasses as a child and I refuse to believe he had some high-tech corrective surgery to eliminate the need for them when lenses are cheaper and less risky)

Doesn't drink caffeine because it makes him jittery

Doesn't drive the Regalia when the guys are around because having other people in the car distracts him from the road. Also he tends to drive like a speed demon, which worries Ignis to no end.

Sunburns insanely easily

Could legit become a hitman if he wanted to with the amount of gun-knowledge he has. It doesn't matter what firearm you put in this boy's hand---pistol, SMG, sniper, rocket launcher, you name it. He can and will hit the target every single time.

Addicted to adrenaline

Pansexual

Has a lot of self-loathing (we see a bit of this in Ep. Prompto) and talks with an online therapist about it via text whenever his lows hit him. He's making great progress in learning how to heal and how to accept himself for who he is beyond the mask he wears for others

Ignis: More than a little bit of a control freak, and works very hard not to be too overbearing or critical about his friends' misgivings

Hypochondriac

Wants to protect everyone all the time and mentally kicks himself when he doesn't get there fast enough

Is SO PROUD of Noctis's journey and felt a stronger hatred towards Ardyn than anyone else in the group for what he forced Noct to go through (he stayed up at night sick to his stomach with hollow rage and baked nonstop to take his mind off of it)

Can verbally obliterate a man, but only rarely chooses to do so bc he's classy like that

After losing his eyes, he notices so much more beauty in the world than he used to (the sound of rain on the Regalia's roof, the specific gait of each of his friends, the smell of salt on the wind in Galdin Quay, the flawless feel of one specific silk tie he has in his repertoire, etc)

His internal compass is never wrong

Regularly takes antacids for his stomach

Has the straightest teeth you've ever seen

Demiromantic

Gladio: Hates being wrong: it's his way or the highway

Actually so much smarter than the musclehead jock front he puts up

A little vain and easily jealous (this man has a Jealous Face like no other)

Thunderstorms are his favorite; his ideal place to be is at a campsite, during a storm, with a well-worn book and a mug of Irish coffee in hand

Would throw himself in front of a bus for any one of his friends

Would beat up kids for the folks he cared about in middle school and spent the time he wasn't training to be a Crownsguard sitting in detention with the most unrepentant, smug, and-I'd-do-it-again look scrawled across his face

Can make a better smoothie than anyone (except maybe Iggy)

Spotify junkie

Had a dinosaur phase as a kid and can still name random facts about them whenever the opportunity presents itself

Avid technology-hater and only has a phone to make calls and join the others in playing King's Knight since they begged him so profoundly (he's sure the thing's going to be his downfall)

Gets most of Prompto's pop culture references

[real-alphas-be-changing-genders]

Youwy and chat started slandering Bloodborne so I left. The slander of fromsofts best game is insane so I am going to list why it's the best game they've ever made:

The environments are beautiful, the gothic Victiorian setting, gorgeous architecture and views. The way the moonlight casts shadows on stuff, and you can see the shadows in the air if that makes sense.

Bloodborne also has the best poison swamp. The snake balls are funny and the way those guys' heads explode into snakes is so creepy and awesome.

The weapons are the best fromsoft has ever made. Original, unique movesets for every weapon (except for kirkhammer/LHB and saw cleaver/spear but those are intended to share movesets and they have some different attacks like the transformed ones) the trick weapon mechanic is peak too, there's so much depth to be had with it.

The chalice dungeon system is very cool too. If you know where to go and what to do you can have a maxed out weapon with perfect gems before beating vicar Amelia. They're fun to explore and a nice challenge. It also features unique enemies and bosses such as the bloodletting beast. I like the bloodletting beast, it is cool. Having the best gems locked behind them gives players an incentive to explore them, but it's not ultimately required, it's just an option for min maxers.

The general bosses are also amazing design wise, as well as gameplay wise. The One Reborn being an abomination made from the corpses of hundreds of yharnamies and yahar'gul citizens. Am attempt by the church to create a great one. A fucked up experiment. It is also a reference to Demon's Souls' Tower Knight, this is cool, and I don't think there are many other direct references to earlier bosses in the souls series (aside from dark souls 3, although they are obvious callbacks considering ds1 has the same world as ds3). Other bosses such as orphan of Kos, the clearest example of the many wrongdoings of the church. a ball of rage left behind to fester and rot in the wake of the church's experiments.

The world building is also great in Bloodborne. The yharnamites that perceive you as a beast, because prior to being infected, they were the ones killing and burning the beasts. Finding the amygdalae scattered across the rooftops, the games shift from gothic Victorian horror to straight up lovecraftian cosmic horror is done so so well.

The fashion - armour is mostly for looks, so you are free to glamorise your hunter as you see fit.

The vilebloods being a clear parallel to black people, lgbt people etc. they were persecuted by the church, who claim they threaten the "purity of the church", and were thus slaughtered based on purely prejudice.

The fact that you are much more involved in the story. Whereas in other games you walk through a bleak and post apocalyptic world, where everything has already happened, in Bloodborne the story is much more responsive to the players actions. The moon phase changes as you progress, the amygdala becomes visible after you kill Rom and break the filter over the world, and unleash the blood moon. The workshop burns after you kill the wet nurse. The cathedral ward becomes much more empty after you either kill Amelia or Rom. This is more subjective, but I personally prefer this.

The lore is also fantastic, I'm sure the lore of the other games is also great but I just love the story of Bloodborne. The greed of the church, the reckless experimentation of godhood. The whole concept of the beast plague is cool.

QUICKSTEP IS SO GOOD AND BADASS THEY MODDED IT INTO ELDEN RING

There is more, will update when I think of anything extra to add

ALSO I've heard people bitch about 30fps like it's a cancer to the eyes, fuck you it's not even a problem you get used to it after like 2 minutes

[ichangemyusertoomuch]

from your post about torchwood character analysis - do you have anything to say about owen? about his death maybe? or his dynamics with other characters?

personally I think Owen's progression is so ignored! many people really don't like him, and I think that's because they buy into his "mean guy" front too much, right from the start, when I prefer to see that as shield of some sorts.

chronologically: his childhood? sucked. in season two, episode five 'Adam', he talks about his mother, claiming that she said that she "didn't have to like him in order to love him". straight off the bat - what the hell - we see that she clearly was some form of abusive. presumably in an emotional manner, by not caring at all and being neglectful. therefore, possibly being a stem for his almost attention-seeking behavior (specifically in season one), where he acts 'mean' in order to get a reaction from others. alternatively it could suggest his self-neglect, as he doesn't actually look after himself, as shown through the means of sexual relationships without any long-term point.

the reason for this??

KATIE! his fiance. the one who literally died of an alien parasite before they could get married. in season two, episode twelve 'Fragments', we see a chunk of his backstory, before he became this 'selfish jerk'. I think that he was a really normal dude, genuinely in love. and the way that that relationship became an absolute trainwreck really mentally damaged him, the way he sees the world, the way he sees love and relationships. I think that kind of loss absolutely destroys a person and hence, as a defense mechanism to avoid the world from hurting him again: he decided to be an extremely unlikable idiot.

in 'Adam' Owen is stripped of his cool-ness and turns into - not many ways to put this - a needy geek. in a deleted scene I found on YouTube (I'll tag the series of deleted scenes below, it's somewhere in that vid), he calls his mother and tries to arrange meeting up with her. that is the only time we ever see him talk to her, and he's very much not himself: he's weaker and so he's dropped the emotion floodgates, calling his mother even though she hurt him. therefore, I feel that Owen isn't actually the jerk he pretends to be. supported by how literally just before he dies (for the final time), he reverts to being a normal person. his plain and sweet self. (which entirely heartbreaking, but I had to add that in, for his depth, my apologies everybody)

he had the affair with Gwen at the peak of the not-caring-about-anybody phase and really seemed to end up regretting it. he and Gwen (as friends) are really sweet, their vibes match so well and I love how they basically have a sibling dynamic.

as for Jack, well, Jack has this amazing power how everyone in Torchwood remains good friends no matter what. Owen shoots Jack? "I forgive you". Ianto shoots Owen? they're friends again in season two. and so I really do think that Jack and Owen are friends. they have trust. a lot of trust, but there is friction (look at the season one finale, for god's sake). Jack resurrected Owen because he emotionally wasn't ready to give him up, and that may have ended up being a selfish move because of how crushing it was on everyone involved.

the zombie arc was a massive challenge and he conquered it so incredibly. from episodes 9-13 (season two) he was fine, give or take the sarcastic comment. in season two, episode eight 'A Day in the Death', Jack provides nothing but tough love to Owen. being what he needed but didn't exactly want.

when Owen died fully in episode thirteen he was ready to stop living like he was. a walking corpse. he did not want to die, but he knew that his insanely fragile existence wasn't worth it.

in conclusion, I think Owen's progression is immaculate. he learns to drop the tough guy brick wall to the point where he has actual two way friendships. although, I do wish he'd had the date with Tosh. although I understand why it wasn't going to happen. they're destined away from each other. (maybe how Owen is destined to find anything but happiness)

thank you for reading, if you made it to here you're a real one 💪

the deleted scene:

[paintedmered]

lyrical analysis of fortnight (ft. post malone) by taylor swift

disclaimers

my analysis will consider the album epilogue, in which taylor explains that her relationship with matty was 'not a love affair!' but a form of 'self-harm' stemming from a 'manic phase' as her relationship with joe disintegrated and then completely fell apart· it will take into account taylor saying matty 'love-bombed' her while feasting on 'low-hanging fruit'.

idc what matty stans think. i'm analysing taylor's perspective, not yours.

if you disagree with my interpretation, you don't need to attack me.

analysis!

based on taylor's amazon music commentary and my own interpretation of the song, fortnight seems to be a hypothetical future where she stays with joe and they get married, but he's not the person she's meant to be with. it picks up where hits different leaves off ('is it you or have they come to take me away?' / 'i was supposed to be sent away, but they forgot to come and get me') – after the break described in hits different, joe returned to her (it was his key in the door, after all) and they gave the relationship another try... but they shouldn't have. she needed out of it for the sake of her mental health. no one intervened, and she now wishes they had. saying they simply 'forgot' to come get her shows how she feels like she slipped through the cracks... (this also calls back to 'my friends found friends who care' from dear reader. she's been checked out with them, so they've been checked out with her.) a similar sentiment is given by 'i was a functioning alcoholic 'til nobody noticed my new aesthetic'. no one noticed how much she was struggling. now she feels more unwell than ever.

the relationship has progressed to the point that they're husband and wife, but their problems haven't been solved... he's cold towards her. he's cheating on her. (this represents the emotional cheating or weird almost-cheating that's implied elsewhere on the album to have actually happened ('he was with her in dreams' / 'fell victim to interloper's glances' / 'i founded the club she's heard great things about' / 'go home to their husbands, smug 'cause they know they can trust him') but also how she feels like his physical cheating is therefore inevitable in this hypothetical future.)

she wants another guy (matty), but he's also married to someone else now. she recalls/fantasises about a fortnight she spent with this guy (likely representing 2014, though whether it was literally or figuratively a fortnight is unclear – the point is that it was a short time). all her days are mondays (widely considered the worst day of the week) in an endless february (one of the coldest, most depressing months of the year) – her existence is merely something to endure. she 'loves' both men, but it's ruining her life. (one is unfaithful and keeps her trapped ('locks and ceilings' on fresh out the slammer), while the other makes her dream of destroying her life as she knows it...) she hates her cheating husband. she hates the other guy's perfectly nice wife. she feels insane and wants to kill someone.

taking the album epilogue into account, my reading of this is: fortnight was the fear – what she saw as the situation taken to its logical end if she didn't leave joe. matty whispered 'what if?' in her ear a lot when things were bad with joe, selling her the 'get-love-quick scheme' referred to in the epilogue – 'what if it's meant to be us? i've always wanted you. i've grown up. i'm ready to give you all the things you want that he won't give you!' ...and in her desperation, she thought, 'what if he's right? what if joe isn't my destined love? what if i stay with him just hoping things will be good again but they never are? what if i'm not meant to marry him anyway? what if i regret not taking a chance on this other guy, and he was meant to be the one all along?' (this is despite the fact that they were only ever involved very briefly in the past, possibly betraying that this 'love' is superficial. she's an unreliable narrator from the beginning of this record, and reality consistently slips through. she touched him for only a fortnight... still, she touched him. some important subtext here is that means she doesn't have to start all over with someone brand new...)

ultimately, she HAS to find out 'what if?'. so at the end of the song, she runs away to florida, buys the car this guy wants and lets him touch her again. there's a LOT of symbolism here: the car she thinks she's bought is actually the rental car he crashes in loml – it's not really hers, just something she uses for a short period of time. the setting of florida leads to the song florida, which contains the same/similar symbolism in the form of the 'timeshare down in destin'. the car is also a getaway car. it will only start up when she lets him touch her again because she's realised the only way to leave her relationship with joe and find out 'what if?' with matty is to actually just DO IT – to go be with him instead of just thinking about being with him (see also: guilty as sin?).

...the rest of the album is her realising she wishes she'd just left it alone ('it was unnecessary, should've let it stay buried' from loml). (this is also why the ivy/wcs mashup happened on tour, imo – he planted roots in her dreamland... but now that she knows, she wishes he'd left her wondering!)

- END -

analysis of other tracks coming soon?

[7grandmel]

Todays rip: 06/09/2023

Sex - Steve Harvey

Season 4 Episode 1 No Album Release (Read More) Sex - Steve Harvey

Ripped by Nozobot

Yknow, I wonder sometimes about the impression people get of the SiIvaGunner channel from reading this blog. I've noticed that some posts have gained minor traction outside of SiIva's core audience on here, such as Four Ardain ~ Roaming the Route~, due to it just being a damn solid arrangement.

In a way, this blog is cherry picking the channel's greatest moments and personal favorites, that gives off a skewed impression of what the channel can truly offer. And though I've dabbled in some unserious rips in the past, today we're going all-in: Sex - Steve Harvey is perhaps the most deranged, most incomprehensible, and most hysterical thing the channel has yet to upload.

In the first four Seasons of the channel, channel creator Chaze the Chat would sometimes release Vlog-like videos wherin he'd declare his intentions and direction for the channel going forward. And though things certainly ended up different due to the sheer scope of the King for Another Day tournament, Chaze's vision for Season 4 Episode 1 was still clearly established at the beginning of 2019: bring back the surprise, chaos and insanity of Season 1 in full force. Seasons 2 and 3 had of course not shied away from unhinged content - a certain purple eggplant was effectively chaos incarnate - but it still felt as if it was being deprioritized over maintaining quality and gradually progressing the lore. With the sudden positive reception to Season 3's King for a Day tournament, it was as if a message had been sent to the SiIva team: The lore can wait, so long as the team is passionate about whatever they make instead.

As the premiere of King for Another Day drew closer, "Not Funny Didn't Laugh Day" was the climax to all of this build-up: A day that was, effectively, chaos incarnate.

Sex - Steve Harvey, in a way, shows just how far any of us are to understanding just what the hell the SiIva team are capable and willing to do. Its arguable that the randomness and surprise that defined Season 1 doesn't quite exist anymore, because we as the audience have "solved" the joke - we KNOW that random takeovers will occur, we know that melodyswaps will happen, we know rips can now occasionally have mashups. But rips made during Not Funny Didn't Laugh Day - and especially Sex - Steve Harvey - felt like taking the next step beyond what Season 1 was doing, and in turn is complete jibberish in YouTube video form. There are dozens of people in the comments still trying to discern what the video means - its original joke is of course parodying Steve Harveys overreactions to lewd answers on Family Feud, but it goes through so many bizarre, nonsensical phases, most of which have no actual connection to one another. Really, the only consistent throughline is the audio quality being consistently compressed into oblivion.

And, yknow, its very possible that I am overthinking this rip, and that it really is just a collection of nonsense. But I swear it should not be able to be as funny as it is if that were the case. Sex - Steve Harvey haunts me like an apparition, I keep coming back to it just to find new things in its concoction of chaos that I might've missed. And "Not Funny Didn't Laugh Day" was FULL of rips similar to this - the entire event is a golden throwback to absurdist comedy's recent history, with platforms like Vine and the edgier period of YouTube developing so many strange ways to gather laughs out of people.

I'm eternally grateful that SiIva will keep finding ways to surprise me, even with dumb bullshit like this.

[trulytiredhermit]

No because imagine the reader who knows how to do Dice stacking.

( you could search videos about it )

It'll be fun to see the reader go like:

"I have a really cool talent, it's called Dice Stacking"

And then proceeds to baffle the Links with that.

It'll be hilarious i promise.

Okay gonna be honest, when I first read this the only thought that went through my mind is Reader teaming up with Ravio to make BANK.

like him and Reader just go to the Hyrule version of Vagas and scam the crap out of people.

Reader just sets up booths in towns and eggs people on to get them to come over and play. The rules? Try to replicate what Reader does.

Starts off simple, Reader sets down and single dice and covers it up with a cup. They slide the cup off the table, do a quick turn of their wrist and catch the dice before it falls to the ground.

But then it progresses. Next phase Reader does the same set up but this time they swirl the cup around and pick it up, keeping the dice up in the air by the momentum.

And then they bring out more dice and perform the dice stacking trick. By this time Reader has driven people insane because HOW THE HELL ARE THEY DOING THIS!!!

But Reader isn’t done yet, oh no, they’re bringing out the big guns.

They’ll look the person they’re up against directly in the eye and just say “Now I’m going to make it so every single 1 side of the dice faces you.”

AND THEY DO IT AND EVERYONE LOSES THEIR SHIT!

Now what are the Chain doing at this time, besides being baffled and in awe at Reader’s amazing-ness?

They’re Reader bodyguards.

Someone starts acting up, being too much of a sore loser? They’re never seen again, just like the money they lost to Reader.

Someone tries to cheat? They get off with a tense warning, they do it again though? The Chain ain’t happy.

You don’t get to try and trick their darling a second time.

Of course members of the chain (Wild and Wind) beg Reader to teach them their tricks.

Legend’s cackling with Reader about tricking rude people out of their money.

Time and Warrior, whilst happy that Reader is enjoying themselves, are happy that they’re getting a steady income of rupees to buy weapons/ingredients/potions with.

Hyrule and Four are a little skeptical and ask Reader straight up if they’re using some form of magic or getting help from the Picori/fairies.

Sky attempts to do what Reader does with a good heart. He really just wants to spend time with Reader and hear them laugh when he fails spectacularly.

I also feel like Twilight, Legend, and Sky are bringing people that they had a hard time completing their mini games to Reader to put them against Reader.

(Listen I have a personal vendetta against those two sections in Skyward Sword against that clown dude mini game and that other dude who was doing the mine cart mini game).

Reader, being as awesome as they are, absolutely decimates these people to the Links’ delight.

And this little talent of Reader’s just makes the Chain fall even deeper in love with them.

[demontouched]

i'm slowly catching up on the mcu....

(thoughts and opinions of someone who is not, and probably will never be, a comic enthusiast, a film major, or cgi specialist below the cut.)

so. i have heard and read nothing but votriol for just about everything after end game. maybe it was the classic fandom progression where everything gets turned into a cesspool (either the fandom survives and becomes good again, or everything implodes and only incels and tarpits remain). i don't really know because i left fandom spaces for like 3 years, but that's a whole different story.

i dropped off after end game, i'm just barely catching up, so i don't know how a lot of everything else turned out. i've liked the multiverse movies i've seen so far (shang-chi, eternals, multiverse of madness, quantumania). they're not masterpieces, but they're good movies. (please remember that this is my opinion and i'm not an expert on anything except myself. the block button and i are best friends.)

despite starting the movie several times, i can never seem to finish wakanda forever. it just feels... sad. without chadwick boseman. don't get me wrong, the movie is interesting, and i love shuri and wakanda. it just doesn't feel right that chadwick isn't there. call it parasocial or whatever, but idk. when black panther first came out, it was compelling. i fell in love with the story of the mcu all over again, and this character specifically. call it parasocial or whatever. idk. i just can't finish the movie.

i really liked shang-chi, i thought it was an interesting movie and it was very pretty in the special effects/cgi department. i liked the story, and while i wasn't completely blown away by the lovie, i did enjoy it a lot. probably my current favorite of the post endgame movies.

eternals was... well, i didn't much care for it either way. it felt strange and lonely, but i think any movie would feel strange and lonely if it happens in a preexisting universe, and is effecting the whole globe, and yet only a certain set of super powered people show up to help.

multiverse of madness was interesting to me. we got to see two preestablished characters who have never interacted collide in a way that doesnt really happen in marvel movies. it wasn't a crossover of any sort (not like venom in no way home or deadpool's fourth wall references) but it was cool. i haven't seen wandavision (i'm television adversed for the most part, honestly. watching movies is like pulling teeth for me, and focusing on a tv show is worse. to me, the tv is for background noise so i don't go insane.) so i'm missing pieces of background for that, i'm sure. something something wanda wanted kids and so she'd destroy the world to have that or whatever. (i'll watch wandavision eventually) i sympathize with craving a life ripped away from you by circumstances out of your control, and i found myself in tears at that one scene, when the kids are terrified of her.

quantumania was a whole other thing. they're setting up the big bad of the arc. like they did with phase one. those little touches of thanos in the end credits, ths machinations of a monster much bigger than them. this is just a step up, a mulitversal problem rather than an in universe one. they did (*imo*) a great job taking this step through by including the slow build to it. the hints of the quantum in phase one movies has lended itself greatly to the build up of this phase.

quantunmania itself was mid. i didn't hate it, i didn't love it. it was interesting to see the probability storm. i think it says great deal about scott as a person that even when he is split into hundreds of millions of versions of himself, his focus will always be cassie. that's a dad if i've ever seen one. it was also an interesting read of hope, as well, that she came all together to help scott and even though the scotts all helped og scott, they only came together when hope arrived. (the metaphor was like a bright red circle in a youtube thumb nail.) also, i loved the ant mimicry in thay scene. and the ants! the ants were probably my favorite part.

end game was a unique film, with countless hours of work from a HUGE cast and crew put into it. blood, sweat, and tears went into that movie. it's a cgi wet dream. it tied up loose end after loose end, sweeping the plot bunnies together in a neat 3 hour long package. i could wax poetically about end game for 3 hours at least. anway. the point of all this is that these movies are fine. they're not end game levels, but i don't think anything will ever live up to end game. maybe i'm wrong, we shall see. maybe i'm stuck in the past. maybe i'm missing a humongous chunk of context bc i haven't been keeping up with the news surrounding marvel. idk. i'm gonna keep enjoying what i enjoy, and despite it's flaws, i do enjoy marvel.