back at it again--
continuing this idea i have for @wellthebardsdead's au fool's prayer.
i was gonna write. the altercation outside the temple room. but yknow i'll get to it later i have to sleep and i wanna post what i wrote :))) (no proofread tho im sorry)
kinks for this i guess are body worship and breeding kink. lmao
--
Nerevar dressed as always, though he chose to forgo most of the elaborate, ceremonial armor he typically wore. Usually he would never dream of going without it on the day of a council meeting, but well…
He had no intention of attending a meeting today. It didn’t matter that Sen Dres had finally recovered enough to attend meetings once more. Even if he did bother attending, its not like anything would come of it.
Morrowind was about to experience a very, very big change, after all. One most of the councilmen would no doubt be furious with him over--much more than they’d be angry with him for simply canceling a meeting. Right before, if Nerevar could guess correctly, Voryn would have their heads roll.
Again, this was a chance for him to back out. He could look for a method of stopping Voryn, simply postponing his promised meeting with him. Nerevar could only buy him so much time before Voryn saw through his ruse, and perhaps it would have been an option if he thought they were any closer to stopping Voryn. But they weren’t--not in the slightest. The idea of actually stopping Voryn seemed further and further away by the day as the enormity of their foe grew. Nerevar knew it was a battle he wouldn’t win; it was best to use alternate methods. If there was a foe you truly couldn’t stop, it was better to appeal to them and manipulate them. Nerevar had attempted as much with the councilors, but was too outnumbered. He might have been the famed chimer king chosen by Azura, but that only worked for around the first century or so. What he actually needed was more political backing to achieve his goals, especially as Red Mountain refused to calm in the wake of its eruption and people were still displaced from Vvardenfell.
Voryn however… He was a better option. He couldn’t guarantee Voryn could even feel ‘love’ anymore, but he did know Voryn had a weakness to Nerevar. The hortator was his lover at one point, and Voryn made it a point to recruit Nerevar now that he was back. For one reason or another Voryn wanted or needed Nerevar at his side, either to secure his power long term, because of the nature of the heart, or out of sheer selfish desire. And Nerevar could use that to his advantage. Temper his wrath and violence like a skilled smith at a forge. Gently persuade him down avenues that benefited both himself and Nerevar, along with securing Vivec’s safety.
He walked down the halls with a purpose. Several temple staff stopped him to tell him the councilors were ready for the meeting, taking in the sight of Nerevar underdressed for the occasion, but Nerevar simply waved them off.
“No meeting today.” Nerevar announced. “I need to commune immediately.”
“Commune?” One of the priests asked, apprehensive.
“Yes,” Nerevar replied, still making his way to the temple room set aside for such a matter. A private room, grandly decorated to the Good Three. Voryn had instructed Nerevar in the precise way to summon him--much like one would summon a daedric prince. He was, after all, not much different than the other princes now with how much raw power he possessed. “It concerns Red Mountain.”
The volcano, able to be seen even from Mournhold, had been behaving strangely after all. The Good Three either could not or would not stop it before, but Voryn had a stronger connection to the heart, and thus, Red Mountain. Already for the past few days it seemed… Restless, as though it was eager to blow again, terrifying the citizens of Morrowind.
The priest looked relieved hearing that, still following him. “Oh thank the Three…” He audibly sighed. “If they can stop it from erupting once more the people will be more than thankful.”
“Where do you think you’re going, Hortator?” Sen Dres was scowling, now also tailing him. Nerevar didn’t stop his stride in the slightest. “It is time for a council meeting--an overdue one while I have been in recovery!”
“There will be no meeting today.” Nerevar replied back coolly, entirely undeterred.
“No meeting?” Sen Dres balked at him. “You do not get to unilaterally decide when there will be a council meeting or not!” He shouted, but Nerevar continued on his path.
“Something of higher importance came up.”
“Ha!” Sen scoffed. “What could be more important than this meeting? We’ve already had to delay it for weeks. There’s several things on the agenda that have been postponed long enough.”
Finally, Nerevar stopped in front of the door to the shrine room, hand reaching for the handle. Seeing this, Sen Dres sneered.
“You’re postponing the council meeting to beg before the Good Three?” Nerevar gave him a harsh glare in return.
“This isn’t something that can be postponed another day.” Nerevar said definitively, baring his teeth. “The meeting can wait.”
“I hope you intend to take responsibility for your blatant disrespect of the great houses Hortator!” Sen Dres shouted, but Nerevar gave him no reply. He opened the heavy doors, and then shut them behind him.
Sen Dres scowled as he walked away, but the moment he was out of view of the priest a cruel smile broke out across his face.
Oh, he had no intention of letting this meeting be canceled. They would simply instead use this opportunity to their advantage. He merely hadn't expected the hortator to give him such an opening so soon.
Sen Dres was more than happy to say the hortator would be simply abstaining from the meeting, throw out the small handful of councilors supporting him, and begin his coup in earnest. The king usually spent hours conversing with the Good Three in ‘important matters’ but rarely with any material reward. It would give them plenty of time to rally armed guards, tie up the priests, and storm into the room to kill the chimer mid-prayer. And even more exciting—Vivec was still powerless, and according to the spies Sen planted, he was with child. Even if their attack was thwarted, Sen could use Vivec as a hostage. Certainly the hortator would do anything and everything in his power to protect the little temple whore and his own unborn child.
It was too easy. The king lined him up in a perfect checkmate without him even realizing. All that was left to do was make his move.
Morrowind no longer needed Nerevar. He was a relic of a bygone era—an old folk hero reborn as an outlander. The only reason he rose to power again was in the wake of the Red Year, but he has no real political backing. House Indoril controlled the temple, but they were a mere shell without Almalexia; she wanted it that way on purpose, after all.
Nerevar had nothing he could bring Morrowind. All he had were naive ideas that charity alone could get them out of this mess, or restricted the Great Houses in an effort to control them.
Today would mark the day he finally did away with him and unshackled Morrowind.
—
Inside, Nerevar mixed incense as he so often did before summoning one of the Good Three. Only this time he made a completely different mixture than he often did, sifting the powders together before tamping down white ash as a bed for it, and then setting it in the proper design. No doubt when Voryn returned he’d have this incense blend standardized and a mold made in his preferred shape, but right now Nerevar would have to make due.
He lit it, inhaling the familiar scent of House Dagoth, hit with melancholy for the past. In his first lifetime he could smell this blend often in the halls of any House Dagoth stronghold, or even clinging onto Voryn’s skin like perfume.
It smelled of home. A long, forgotten home. His mouth quivered and his eyes watered, but he forced the tears down.
The past was in the past. Nothing he could do could change it--a lesson he learned over and over. Even now, Voryn wasn’t the same, but Nerevar intended to use him as needed.
For his own safety as well as Vivec’s. And hopefully in the long term, for the good of Morrowind entirely.
He then said prayers, kneeling on the plush pile of pillows he prepared as well, apprehensive.
When the prayers were finished, he waited. Seconds ticked by, each one filling him with more concern. Had he done it incorrectly? Had Voryn changed his mind? No--no that couldn’t be it. He did everything to the letter as Voryn instructed, and Voryn wouldn’t have given up on Nerevar so easily. Or was it… Voryn had played him entirely? Did Voryn intend to use this as his opening into the world and ran off to cause chaos?
Just as his worries started to get the better of him though he felt two cool hands cover his eyes, a dark chuckle behind him. He jumped at first, before relief washed over him.
“Apologies,” Voryn whispered, “I was simply admiring you kneeling like that.”
“Voryn,” Nerevar began, before Voryn continued, his voice slow and seductive.
“You’re the first person to pray to me in earnest, after all.” Voryn nibbled playfully on his ear, coaxing a few moans from Nerevar’s throat. “Though you won’t be the last.” He chuckled again, before blowing softly, watching Nerevar’s ear twitch and listening to the stranger groan that followed. “But you will always be my first and most devout worshiper, won’t you?”
“Yes,” Nerevar gasped softly, leaning against Voryn. “Yes, I will be…”
“You’ll even carry the child of a god, my perfect heir…” He rubbed Nerevar’s stomach almost tenderly, before continuing to nibble and kiss along his neck. “Oh how I’ve longed to have you in my arms once more…”
“Voryn~” Nerevar keened, before Voryn wrangled him onto the pile of plush pillows.
“Look at you…” Voryn was smirking with delight, cupping Nerevar’s flushed cheek. “You look like the perfect offering to me.” Nerevar shuddered at the cold touch, before instantly, Voryn’s hand felt warm and alive again once more.
“How should I make love to you, Neht?” Voryn asked, his voice soft and tender, before his skin changed to chimer gold once more. “Like this?” He leaned in close, his voice soft and tender. “Do you miss this form, my Moon and Star?”
“So long as it’s you, I don’t care.” Nerevar whispered back. “Though I’d… Prefer if your skin is warm.” Voryn chuckled at that, his skin fading to grey once again.
“I’m perfectly happy with that.” Voryn purred. “I want to make sure it feels as good as possible for you, after all.” He was already pulling Nerevar’s shirt up and over his head. “Perhaps another time we can relive the past like before.” Voryn’s hands then slide up and then back down Nerevar’s torso in long, gliding strokes, making Nerevar’s eyes flutter shut. “I can lay you on my bed… Dress you in the finest silks…” Nerevar could already picture it, “And be the one to worship you.”
“Mm, would you…?” Nerevar cracked his eyes open, looking up at Voryn. He didn’t think Voryn would; not after becoming a god, anyways. Perhaps he was just trying to appeal to Nerevar, making empty promises. Nerevar was nervous about expecting too much from him.
“Of course,” Voryn smiled warmly now, as he caressed Nerevar’s cheek again. “You’ll be my consort… The holiest of saints in my temple…” Voryn leaned in closer, “My beloved…”
Voryn’s lips met his in a surprisingly tender kiss. He’d expected Voryn to be ravenous when he was summoned, throwing Nerevar to the floor to debauch him properly. But like this he was slow, sensual, lips moving in sync with Nerevar’s as his tongue tangled with the hortator’s in a slow dance. Nerevar had to hold his shoulders to ground himself, but every movement has him wanting more and more. Now he was starting to feel like the impatient one as Voryn took his time exploring Nerevar’s mouth and tasting him thoroughly, Nerevar’s breathing growing more and more labored.
“In fact,” Voryn whispered as he pulled away, a string of saliva still connecting their mouths, “I think I will worship you today, Neht.” Voryn smiled slyly as he began to slide down Nerevar’s body, pressing warm, wet kisses across his skin. “You’ve finally come to me, after all, and it’s time I reward you properly…”
His lips closed around a nipple, sucking soft and gentle at first as he coaxed soft whimpers and moans out of Nerevar’s throat. It was almost teasing how thorough he was being in working Nerevar up, swirling his tongue around the bud before giving it a soft nibble.
“Should I have these pierced?” Voryn asked, looking up at him before giving another swirl of his tongue as his hand played with the other. Nerevar keened again, arching up against his mouth. “It’s typically relegated to concubines but…” Voryn nipped a bit harder this time, listening to the sharp whine that followed. “I think they’d look perfect on you… Make these so much more sensitive…” Nerevar was panting now, knowing full well he was soaking wet already. “I wonder if I could make you cum just from touching you like this with how sensitive your chest would be…” Voryn flicked both of them now, before giving a soft pinch.
“Ah~!” Nerevar’s cunt was aching in need now as his hips shifted to grind against the larger mer. “Voryn~” He whined again, all the while Voryn continued to touch and tease him mercilessly.
“You’d like that, wouldn’t you?” Voryn asked with a smirk, before kissing his way to the other bud, giving it a soft lick, before closing his lips around to suck, flicking it with his tongue the whole while.
“Yes,” Nerevar gasped in between moans, “Yes, I want it, I want it Voryn~”
Voryn’s lips finally let go, both of his nipples flushed and standing erect. His hips were still shifting under Voryn though as Voryn began kissing his way down Nerevar’s chest, down his ribs, and trailing towards his trousers.
“I can’t wait to taste you again,” Voryn whispered, his tone almost dangerous as he undid the lacing on them, before tugging the fabric down and off Nerevar’s legs. Nerevar helped by kicking them off, moaning from the teasing strokes at his thighs. Voryn then slid his underwear down, pulling it off him in full, before spreading Nerevar’s thighs and settling himself between them.
“Voryn…” Nerevar groaned, his hands in Voryn’s hair, trembling from his desire.
“So wet…” Voryn remarked, delighted as he admired Nerevar so closely. It honestly made his face burn in embarrassment, even his ears turning red. “You look just as perfect as you did back then…” Voryn whispered, before leaning in to give a soft kiss to his lips, before moving up to press a kiss to his cock. Every touch of his lips has Nerevar’s body jerking, cries spilling uncontrollably from his mouth. It wasn’t enough—it wasn’t nearly enough for him.
“Stop,” Nerevar pleaded. “Stop teasing me—“
“Teasing you?” Voryn asked, pulling away enough to look up at him and cock an eyebrow. “I’m not teasing you at all.” Voryn smirked now, his fingers just pressing against Nerevar’s entrance, but not slipping inside. “I’m memorizing you again, as I promised.”
“Voryn~!” He needed more; Nerevar needed more. He couldn’t handle this level of teasing—not after so long apart.
“I’m worshiping your body, just like you deserve…” Voryn purred, his fingers finally slipping inside. “This perfect, gorgeous body that is finally… All… Mine…” His lips then closed around Nerevar’s cock, suckling softly, listening to Nerevar howl in pure pleasure.
“Yes!” Nerevar’s eyes rolled back as he tried to tug Voryn closer and closer. “Fuck yes, fuck yes!!” Voryn’s tongue flicked against it too, before he removed the pressure and instead pressed another wet kiss. Nerevar groaned in displeasure at the loss, before gasping and moaning again as Voryn gave it playful licks and twirls of his tongue, following it up with another kiss.
“So hard for me, aren’t you…” He purred again, giving another long lick, letting his tongue flatten out. Nerevar’s legs were trembling as Voryn’s fingers stroked slowly against his sweet spot, the pleasure overwhelming his senses. When it felt like this, Nerevar couldn’t believe he hadn’t given in sooner. It felt mind numbing how wonderful it all was, unable to think of a single problem and instead focusing solely on the ecstasy he was hurtling towards.
“Yes,” Nerevar moaned, “So hard for you, my cock is so hard for you…” Nerevar’s hips were bucking towards the warm, wet heat of Voryn’s mouth. “Please, suck me off again, I want to feel your mouth…” Voryn obliged him, his lips closing around it once more, suckling and flicking his tongue back and forth just like he knew Nerevar liked it. “Oh gods, yes!” Nerevar moaned freely, feeling his orgasm building, getting that much closer to the edge.
“I’m close—I’m close—“ Nerevar clung to Voryn with one hand, cradling his head close, the other gripping one of the pillows under him so tight his knuckles were going white. “Please make me cum,” Nerevar pleaded, “Please, I wanna cum for you~” He had no shame anymore, focused solely on pleasure. “Please, I’m yours, I’m all yours!” He was fully sobbing in pleasure now, so very, very close…
With one last suck and flick of Voryn’s tongue, Nerevar was finally falling, chanting Voryn’s name the whole while. It was red hot, a burning intensity that came in waves as Voryn forced him to ride it out, his whole body trembling. It was absolute bliss as his mind went fully blank, every other coherent thought fizzling out.
He laid there panting for some time, basking in the afterglow of such a satisfying orgasm. It was even better than the one he had in his dream, a warm, fuzzy feeling settling throughout his body.
“Good boy.” Voryn praised him, before leaning in close to kiss his cheek after moving back up his body after leaving a few love bites across his thighs. Nerevar hummed in satisfaction now, turning to give him a soft kiss in return.
“Your turn…?” Nerevar asked, and Voryn chuckled.
“Almost,” He replied, slowly stripping himself as well. “There is one more thing to do.”
Nerevar raised a brow, before Voryn pulled out a small dagger. It was part of the temple room, used to give offerings, but Nerevar’s heart began pounding in fear seeing it.
“Hush,” Voryn soothed him instantly. “This isn’t to harm you, my Moon and Star…” he then brought the knife to his own wrist, slitting across it just enough for it to bleed. It wasn’t crimson red though, but instead bled a pure black—liquid ebony.
“Why…?” Voryn smiled warmly once again, offering his wrist.
“I’ve lost you once before,” Voryn replied, “I watched you be killed, powerless to stop it,” He almost sounded… Genuine like this. Vulnerable.
Like it was his Voryn again. The man he loved in the flesh once more.
“I refuse to lose you again.” Voryn swore, his eyes shining. “I want to tie you to me, in body and spirit.” He then offered Nerevar his wrist. “You will be my greatest weakness after this, the person they’ll target first.” Voryn was almost pleading with him now. “Please, drink it.”
His reasoning was sound. It was true that when the people of Morrowind found out Voryn couldn’t be killed, they’d target Nerevar next. And even if it was a lie… What did it matter? Nerevar had already given in. Even if this would kill him and turn him into a mindless ash ghoul immediately, Nerevar was in too deep to run now. At least his final moments would have been spent receiving an absolutely mind numbing orgasm.
Nerevar leaned forward and took his wrist, licking the trail of the metallic liquid that spilled, before closing his mouth around it and drinking.
“Good boy…” Voryn whispered, stroking his hair. At first it was just unpleasant from how metallic it was, before Nerevar felt warmth blooming in him. Voryn then held his head firmly, keeping him there. Quickly, Nerevar realized why he had done so, as quickly the warmth turned to burning.
He struggled first, crying out in pain. It had been a lie—that sweet face had been a lie. It hurt so much Nerevar was convinced he was dying, burning from the inside out, but Voryn merely restrained him and forced him to drink.
“I’m sorry my love,” Voryn whispered. “It will hurt at first, becoming one with me…” Voryn also winced. “… It hurts me too…. But we… Need to endure it….”
Nerevar cursed him mentally, still trying to push him off, before his body went rigid, and then finally limp, now robotically drinking.
Fuck, it wasn’t poison. Instead Voryn intended to use it to control his body. Luckily the pain was fading now, still a simmering warmth in him, but he was no longer sobbing in agony. Now it was a localized pain in his upper stomach, a dull ache.
“That’s it…” Voryn praised him. “I’m sorry my love for controlling your body like that,” Voryn apologized now, cooing softly and stroking Nerevar’s hair. “But it’s just for your safety.”
Nerevar scowled inwardly, only the slightest furrow in his brow showing how actually angry he was as he was forced to obediently drink. “Don’t be angry with me Neht…” Voryn whispered, “… I’ll make it feel good too, in exchange.”
The slow, simmering warmth then began to burn anew but this kind a much more delightful kind of fire. Pleasure licked every nerve in his body as he twitched and trembled, eyes rolling back.
“There, much better isn’t it?” Nerevar was climaxing untouched helplessly, unable to respond even if he wanted to. It was another long and overwhelming orgasm too, just as he had before, his thoughts turning off once more.
Finally, Voryn let the pleasure subside, before finally pulling his wrist away and freeing Nerevar’s body. Not like it mattered; he felt completely boneless from the intensity of it all.
“Here…” Voryn smiled warm once more, almost lovingly like he did back then. “Finally… You’re all mine entirely…”
“… Not yet,” Nerevar whispered back against Voryn’s lips, and Voryn stopped the impending kiss to look at him quizzatively. Nerevar decided to show him by wrapping a leg around Voryn’s hips, pressing their bodies closer together. “You still haven’t gotten inside me yet.”
Voryn smirked wide and dark at that, a sort of devilish smirk that made Nerevar excited so many times in the past.
“You’re correct,” Voryn replied, his breath hot against Nerevar’s lips. “Let me correct that.”
This kiss was much more impassioned and desperate, the hunger Nerevar having expected previously. He was pinned down swiftly, Voryn pressing the head of his cock to Nerevar’s entrance.
“So wet…” Voryn muttered into Nerevar’s neck. “Oh, Neht…”
“You made me cum twice,” It was Nerevar’s turn to pure back, shifting them slightly so he could nibble on Voryn’s ear, “Now it’s your turn.”
“Yes,” Voryn hissed, finally rocking his hips forward, before moaning long and deep. “Oh Nerevar, Neht,” Voryn moaned, before tugging him into a short, messy kiss, “No matter how long we’ve been apart, being inside you makes me weak…”
“Even as a god~?” Nerevar moaned back as Voryn rocked in and out, trying to work himself deeper into Nerevar.
“Yes!” Voryn moaned louder, giving a form thrust down. “Even as a god—!” Voryn was thrusting wildly now, his last bit of self control snapping. It seemed calling him a god excited him more than Nerevar had expected.
The thrusting was once again, mind numbingly blissful in how good it felt. He was so slick the glide was easy, but he saw stars every time Voryn thrust.
“Your body will be mine completely,” Voryn moaned inbetween hot, passionate kisses. “All mine,” Nerevar was trembling, eyes rolling back as he moaned freely into the kiss as well, “In a way no one will ever get to have you!”
“Yes!” Nerevar was clinging to Voryn, trying to claw himself closer. “All yours, I’m all yours!”
“You’re going to have my heir.” Voryn demanded, his thrusts finally settling on a hard and fast pace. The sentence sent Nerevar that much closer toward the edge all over again. “You’re going to have only my children,” Nerevar knew Voryn would make sure of it, killing anyone who even thought about it, if their seed would even take. He already had corprus and now he’d drank Voryn’s blood. He wouldn’t put it past his lover to make sure Nerevar could only conceive with Voryn. “As many children as you want Neht—” Voryn kissed him passionately again and again, his breathing labored.
“Cum inside me!” Nerevar pleaded, “Cum inside me—knock me up—!” Voryn moaned louder, his pace beginning to falter.
“Neht—!” Voryn held him tighter and tighter, and Nerevar almost felt like the ground under him was trembling. “Get pregnant, get pregnant!” Voryn demanded, before finally his rapid thrusting stopped with a jerk of his hips, heat erupting in Nerevar. “Fuck…” Voryn swore, giving a few more shallow thrusts as he shot rope after rope inside Nerevar’s waiting body.
Nerevar had been furiously rubbing his own cock, but finally feeling Voryn spill his seed was enough to drive Nerevar over the edge. His lover was cumming inside him—making Nerevar’s body his. Voryn’s seed would take and Nerevar would finally be pregnant with his heir, a child with the man he loved like he’d always wanted.
He trembled as he came, mouth open and eyes completely glazed over in pleasure. His cunt spawned around Voryn’s cock, making Voryn groan.
“Milking me for every drop…” He panted, simply laying there and embracing Nerevar.
Nerevar didn’t know how long they laid there. He simply was basking in the bliss that always followed their most intense lovemaking sessions. But, reluctantly, Voryn finally pulled out of him, rolling off him.
“Let me clean you up.” Nerevar whined in displeasure as Voryn stood up, walking over to a nearby water basin, disappointed from the loss of contact.
“Can’t we just lay here a while longer…?” Nerevar asked, and Voryn smiled.
“As much as I’d love to,” Voryn brought over a wet rag, gently cleaning him up. He’d likely need a proper bath, but it was enough to let him redress. “It seems we have company.”
“Hm?” Nerevar asked, before glancing around suspiciously. The air was hazy from incense, but it was possible Voryn could still see them. “Outside, it seems like some people are trying very hard to get in, banging on the door and demanding you…” Nerevar scowled at that, the bliss fading and replaced by annoyance. “It’s probably some councilmen demanding I come out for a meeting…”
“Well then,” Voryn smirked, “Let’s go give them a meeting.”
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So, despite some faults, I really enjoyed totk, and on its anniversary I want to say something about it. Other people have said similar things before but it’s really important to me and actually a big part of why the story of totk was meaningful to me, so I want to also say it:
Zelda needed to come back from draconification. The story needed that. It wasn’t lazy and just ignoring “consequences” because (imo) that was the *point*
The point is to feel like there are going to be terrible consequences and then say actually, no. You can come back from this, with the help of other people.
To me at least, that was the theme of the whole story.
If botw was about how the world goes on past loss and grief and starts to heal (how flowers grow in the ruins and the world can be beautiful again, be worth saving, even if it has changed)…then totk was about a more personal kind of healing.
The weight of the world should not be on your shoulders alone…you, alone, should not have to fix everything…you should not have to sacrifice yourself, but when you do, someone will be there to save you from it.
This turned into a really long ramble so:
You (Link) gained so much and now it’s gone. It feels like you’re back to where you started and yet you know you have to do it all again…you were weak and you failed and you’re weaker now…but
You go down to the surface. Monsters swarm across it once again. Other people are fighting them too though. You help, but it’s not just you…
You go to the Rito, the Gorons, the Zora, the Gerudo…just like with the divine beasts, there are friends who help you save each region. But this time, part of them comes along with you when you leave. It’s nice, you realize, the first time one of them protects you from a monster you weren’t prepared for. You’re still weaker than you were before, but someone has your back…
When you go up to the sky you see a strange new dragon there. There’s something about them that feels familiar. You try not to think about it.
You go down to the depths too. It’s terrifying at first. You hate it. You only want to get what you came for and get out of the dark….but slowly, the light grows. You get stronger. The dark feels like a challenge you can face (and someone has your back).
There are spirits down there. You don’t know when they’re from, but some part of you wonders…are these all the people you let die in the Calamity? (You help them find rest from their wandering. The weight on your shoulders feels a little less heavy).
There’s so much gloom. The first few times the sky turns red and hands chase you (a reminder of what you’ve lost, how you failed) you just run. Eventually though, you have to fight. It feels like the (second) worst day of your life again. But you manage to get free of the grasping gloom and stand and fight, as wild and desperate as it is. Beneath the manifestation of your worst fears, there’s another thing to fight, but this time it has a face (a voice in the back of your head says…you know this isn’t all on you and your failure…it’s really Ganon’s fault right?). You get through it.
At every turn in your travels, it seems like something reminds you of Zelda. Her passion, her curiosity, her kindness. You miss her.
At first, the tears you find reassure you. She may be in the past, but she’s safe. She’ll come back somehow…but then you hear the word draconification for the first time. You want to believe she wouldn’t do it but you know her and the fear sits cold inside you. (Zelda is a lot of things. She’s been allowed to be more of them, since she was freed from her hundred year battle, without her father holding her back. But deep down inside her, there’s a vein of self-sacrifice that still runs strong. It’s what saved the world before, after all).
She did it. She really did it. She’s gone from you (from Hyrule) forever, and it’s all your fault. If only you hadn’t failed so utterly in the battle (you can hardly even call it that) under the castle. If only you’d caught her. If only you hadn’t let the sword break. You should have protected her you should have been better it’s all your fault and now she has to live with the consequences, forever. Everything really is on you, you should have been better.
(Zelda POV: you couldn’t call upon Hylia’s power in time, you were too content to let it wither and fade away from you, ready to be free of it. You shouldn’t have. He got hurt, the sword got hurt, it’s your fault…Sonia and Rauru help you channel it again, Sonia helps you learn how to turn back time…but you don’t save her. She dies because you couldn’t save her. Rauru dies not long after. There is no one left to guide you, once again. You could spend years trying to figure it out on your own. But you did that last time. It didn’t work. Self-sacrifice, stepping in front of someone you love, that worked. (You do what you can, to call upon the sages, to help Link in the future, first). And then you swallow the stone. You’ve come a long way, in the past five years, allowing yourself to exist. But in the end, self-sacrifice worked last time. It’ll work this time too.)
You (Link) go down beneath the castle. You were supposed to bring the sages but you didn’t. It’s nice, for someone to have your back. But no one else should get hurt to fix your mistakes.
They follow you anyway. They fight with you, against the hordes, against the greatest enemies you defeated together, along the way. They’ll have your back, even if you don’t think you deserve it.
You fight Ganondorf, and then the demon king, in the hardest battle of your life. You think it’s over and then the demon king decides it’s better to lose himself completely than let you win. You’re exhausted and afraid of yet another battle, but up there in the sky, when you’re falling, the Light Dragon catches you (you wonder why she changed her path to catch you, you wonder if there’s still something of Zelda left in there to save). With her help, you win.
And then you’re in some other realm. The spirits of Sonia and Rauru are there. You remember how the two of them and Zelda channeled such incredible power together. You think about Recall. Turning something back to the memory of what it was before, like Sonia said. You stand with them and you allow yourself to hope. Maybe the Light Dragon can remember the form she took so long ago, the person that she was.
And then you’re falling, and Zelda is falling, but this time you catch her. You catch her. She’s back home with you, finally, finally.
And maybe, one mistake doesn’t have to be the end of the world. You don’t have to be perfect. Sometimes, someone else can stand with you, and it’ll all turn out alright. (You can put the weight of the world on your shoulders, you can sacrifice yourself, but someone will be there to catch you, someone will be there to pull you back to yourself, when all is said and done).
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