#i dont know what im doing wrong or if im doing something wrong and if not how i could handle this better bc this is clearly not the way
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caldre smut fic
includes spanking, praise, degradation, daddy kink, andre being overly worried, etc.
note: this came from a post and then my boyfriend found the full video, so i decided to write this….enjoy your slop/j
calvin was situated over andres lap while he sat on his bed, jeans pulled down to his knees to show his grey boxers.
cal had wanted to try something different this time around, but andre was hesitant.
it was weird to put it simply and he didnt want to hurt his boyfriend. although, theyve done a lot worse - even before they established they were dating.
so, nonetheless he still tries.
“just do it, ‘dre. itll be fine,” cal reassures him, looking back at him “im *asking* you to do it, arent i?”
andre slowly nodded “well, yeah, but i dont want to - you know, hurt you.”
the blonde smiled, enjoying all of the others worry and care “thats the point though, andre. its supposed to hurt.”
hes not wrong, it was supposed to hurt. he just didnt want to get too carried away and hurt him *too* badly.
calvin seems to know what hes thinking, so he adds “i trust you. i know you wont make it too bad.”
with that andre lets out a sigh, flexing his hands to let his knuckles crack “if it hurts too bad youll tell me, yeah?”
calvin quickly nodded, too eager to worry about that sort of thing. he liked how much andre cared, but sometimes it would get in the way of things.
however, the brunette finally gets on with it, trusting that cal will tell him if it becomes too much for him.
andre lays his hand flat over calvins ass, lifting it before bringing it right back down. it wasnt anything too hard at first, but it wasnt too soft either.
cal lets out a short squeak, burying his face into the bedsheets. it felt good although it wasnt exactly the roughness he was looking for.
he brings his hand up again and then back down, taking note of the way the others body seemed to jolt.
he does it a third time and then a forth, now being able to feel cals erection hard against his thigh.
���do it - a little harder, please, andre.” he begged, voice muffled from the bed sheets. he *needed* it to be as hard and rough as possible.
andre hesitated again though, but ultimately obliged - he brought his hand down harder this time which pulls a whiny moan out of his boyfriend.
“was that alright?” he asked, wanting to make sure he was doing it how he wanted him to.
“yeah - god, yeah, ‘dre. keep doing it like that *please.*” his eagerness and begging seemed to take a toll on him. it was always one of the things that got to him.
andre hits him even harder, reveling in the cry he gets in return. its beautiful, really, he thought all the noises cal made were gorgeous.
he gets ready to do it again, but is interrupted by feeling the other grind down against his thigh. it makes his breath hitch and he gets an idea - an idea he has no clue if calvin will like or not, but he does it anyway.
andre slams down his hand twice as hard, getting an even louder cry from cal “dont fucking grind against me unless i tell you otherwise, alright?”
the blonde is ecstatic as soon as he says that - he loves when andre is dominant and can use his naturally commanding tone for something like this.
“yeah - yes, sir - daddy, ah, fuck,” it comes out in a string of nonsense, but hes able to catch onto what he says and it makes his erection strain against his pants.
he doesnt reply though and just lays another slap down, listening to the moaning and whining.
he decides though that he wants to change this up a little bit.
he takes a moment to pull down calvins grey boxers, exposing him fully now. he doesnt seem to mind it - only letting out a whimper from the lack of touch.
andre gives him what he wants again though, flattening out his hand once more and hitting him.
it hurts more now without the barrier and cal lets it show, pressing his hips down as if to move away from the other.
the brunette takes notice and lays down an even harsher hit “i thought you wanted this, calvin? did you change your mind?”
cal cant get over the way he says his name, whimpering again as he shook his head, but that wasnt good enough. he lets out a yelp as hes hit once again.
“yeah - i do, i want it, sir,” it comes out, almost stuttery “please - im sorry.”
andre hummed, letting his hand rest over his ass as he rubbed at the mark already starting to form “tell me how much you want it, cal.”
the blonde swallowed hard, but does his best to answer “so, so bad, ‘dre. i - i wanna feel your hands on me,” he yelped as he was cut off by another slap, but he continued “please, daddy - shit, it feels so good.”
andre wasnt sure if he was dreaming or not. this was too good to be true and he couldnt get enough of it.
he then grabbed a fistful of his silky blonde hair, yanking his head up to look at him.
there were *tears* streaking down his face and there was spit covering his mouth and chin.
he hadnt even realized he started crying and he wants to ask if hes okay - if this was getting to be too much for him, but his boyfriend already knew what he was going to say, so he gives him a short, subtle nod for him to continue.
thats all he needed.
“are you sure thats what you want?,” he questioned, yanking his head back a little further “you want me to keep hurting you like youre some *slut?*”
the blonde nodded eagerly, sniffling “please, please daddy. i need it so fucking bad - you have no idea.”
he lets go of his hair and gets ready to continue, but the other is confused when he doesnt get right back to it.
however, his confusion turns to excitement when he hears andre unbuckling his belt and sliding it out of the loops on his pants.
andre holds both ends and doesnt hesitate to smack it right down against him, hearing the string of sounds and sobs it earns.
he does it again and again - continuing to do it over and over again while he watched the area turn a pretty shade of pink and red.
it was beautiful. he thought calvin looked like an angel no matter what they were doing - even if it something as dirty as this.
“oh, oh ��dre,” he moaned, digging his nails into the bed sheets “you gotta let - let me do it, daddy. oh, you have to.” its obvious what he means and he figured it wouldnt hurt to let him.
“only if you can behave - dont hump me like some damn dog.” before he can even finish his sentence, he was already grinding down against him like earlier. it felt good to finally relieve the pain.
at this point the blonde was panting like a dog, grinding down against andres thigh so hard that his jeans were starting to irritate his cock, but he makes no effort to stop him.
“oh, fuck, fuck - you, you gotta let me cum, daddy, please-“ it comes out in a sob - so desperate and needy to get himself off no matter what.
andre doesnt have a reason not to let him, so he agreed “yeah, go ahead, cal.” he says it all soft, contrasting from his earlier tone.
calvin takes that and grinds his hips down just about as hard as he could while andre takes the opportunity to lay another hit or two on him.
it was only a moment later that he was cumming all over his thigh with a high pitched moan - moaning andres name as loud as he could, just for him to hear.
its music to his ears, he thinks. all of this was perfect.
calvin is exhausted by the time hes finished, letting himself lay on andres lap while he comes down from his high.
the brunette sets the belt down and placed his hand back over the marks, rubbing over them gently again “that was really good.” he says it, sounding embarrassed for even being into it.
calvin lets out a breathless laugh, finding it cute how embarrassed he seemed to be.
he managed to sit up after a moment, trying to get over the stinging pain in his body “you did good too, ‘dre. youre the best at this,” he compliments him, leaning in to give him a quick kiss before pulling away “im so lucky to have you.”
the contrast between his words and what they did was amusing, but andre didnt care. he just smiled as his face warmed up.
although before he can comment, cals already looking down at his pants.
“oh, andre, your pants,” he tries to hold back his laughter “youre too easy.”
he gives him a confused look, but when he looks down he becomes about a hundred times more embarrassed. there was a wet spot right over his front, obviously from cumming himself.
“goddamnit,” he hissed under his breath “ruined my damn jeans.”
“they were already ruined anyway,” he gestured to the more obvious white spot that was from cal rather then himself “you can just borrow mine, i dont care.”
cal could say he was lucky all he wanted, but at the end of the day andre was even luckier then him.
“thanks, man,” he sighed “do you need me to do anything for you? you know - because…” he was still worried he had hurt him too much, but his boyfriend was quick to reassure him again.
“im fine, andre. dont worry so much,” he smiled as he wiped away the remaining tears in his eyes, face now tacky and dry “you did great.”
he finds it hard to believe him, but he forces himself to anyway.
“im allowed to worry, cal. youre my - uh, shit…” his voice trails off, not being able to say the word. it was all still so new so he didnt want to mess up and say the wrong thing.
“just because im your *boyfriend* now doesnt change anything,” he says it for him “im still the same person.”
he placed his hand on the side of his face, kissing him again. the other quickly reciprocated and leaned into it.
“i love you, ‘dre.”
“i love you too, cal.”
#tcc fandom#tcc tumblr#tccblr#tcctwt#tee cee cee#tccblur#teeceecee#anoufrievboy fanfics#caldre#calvin gabriel#cal gabriel#andre kriegman#zero day 2003#zero day
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i have been gone for a little bit, and im sorry for that, but there is something i want to talk about regards the sky x pressure au
i have been seeing pressure fandom get more and more suffocating and hectic, especially in regards to people who even remotely enjoy sebastian,, i have been seeing my friends be harrassed, I Have been harrassed, and it never fully goes away, since the devs seem to be at best, ignorant of their own community, and at worst, complacent with the harrassment
i dont believe they are these horrible people who want to spread misery,, i think theyre normal people who werent ready for a giant fandom,, but i cant also deny that i dread the idea of interacting with pressure fandom or creating for it
if my artworks cant bring happiness to neither myself or the people i create for, then maybe i am creating for the wrong people
so i wont be drawing anything pressure related for the time being, at least,,
this brings up sky x pressure,,, i know its what im mostly known for and i love it dearly, so abandoning it would be a big loss, which i dont want to do,, many people also love the au and i dont want to let them down
i guess what i wanna say is, that im gonna probably slow down (yeah no shit how long has it been since you last posted, starry) the comics,, its not fair if i stop now, no matter my discomfort with the fandom and the devs
thank you for your patience,, i will post for the au again soon <3
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Just another queer ship
I know many of you just are here bc you wanted to see bkdk metas years ago -many have left since then, changed accounts, stopped getting my content, or just moved on to the work others do in the fandom-, but I also know some of you feel at least a little bit like me. You felt connected to this for many reasons, as many as the amount of followers I have, but I want to talk about me, hoping the ones that understand also get to have... something, I guess.
These ships were important to me partially bc of being my special interest, partially bc they are queer; I know some ppl believe its wrong of others to enjoy shipping "just bc they are gay", they just have been a huge part of my life and followed me thru different stages of accepting queerness on its own and on myself. Its kind of funny, how this started when I just tried so hard to be non queer and how it ended when I accept that im a genderqueer lesbian.
I remember back then I saw romance as that uncomfortable pressure of expectation and need of validation whenever an older guy (like young man I mean, I was like 13 so older guy looked like that) was in front of me -bc romance was always like that-, how picking a random guy means love, or how eye contact means im telling that guy Im interested in him. Because romance is always about a boy and girl just ending together as the ending of all stories -if I wanted to do things right, I needed that, I needed to show off a random guy to others, even metaphorically, as long as him and I were never completely alone (this "relationship" needed to be useful for something, for others to see how great I do this, how im a winner in life).
Its funny, isnt it? I really wanted this to be a subversion, to understand how complex these feelings can be and that a girl and boy can be friends and be so important to each other, that the feelings you have for someone "you arent supposed to like" can be real, and strong, and impact you forever.
I dont care about what we got.
To whoever is reading this, if anyone does at all, im guessing you could be another queer person who got their heart broke because the shonen that wasn't supposed to be like other shonen ended up like all the stories do. So to you let me tell you this:
Don't you dare give your heart for this. There are so many harmful many things in this world, and I dont want you wasting your spirit over a story that never cared about us. Im nobody to tell anyone anything but I dont want us to once again yearn for a queer story in the shows, books, comics and movies that clearly dont want us there.
Its normal to feel the overwhelming pressure in your life -there are tons of things to worry about, so many injustices- and wanting to find comfort in media, and how it hurts when the author takes that away from you. Im not telling you to stop shipping or consuming what you watch, im telling you to use that into something for all of us. There are queer shows, music, entertainment, communities, etc., and we can also use fandom spaces to create and see what makes us feel seen -thats the rule of fandom, if nobody has written it then do it yourself even if its ugly and imperfect.
The ending of THE manga that has been by my side for what could be half my life is everything I feared it would be, but Im the most queer I have ever been. The manga wasn't for us? Okay, I'll be part of whatever I create then.
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im annoyed and a little pedantic so can i just say as a blanket statement
queerbaiting is when the promotion for a FICTIONAL STORY intentionally hints towards two characters having a romantic relationship, without any intention to follow through in the show, in order to get queer people watching without discouraging the homophobic enjoyers of the show
queerbaiting is NOT:
a celebrity who you think is queer because theyre gnc or they have a 'vibe'. that is a real person and they cannot queerbait
two friends of the same gender pretending to flirt with each other for fun. those are real people and they cannot queerbait
a show with two characters of the same gender who are canonically friends that YOU PERSONALLY think would be better in a relationship. that's not bating, that's shipping, and subject to opinion
there are more but those are the main examples of people misunderstanding what queerbaiting is and being mad at something that isn't actually a problem
#the general rule if youre unsure is to ask yourself 'is that a real person i think is hinting that they are queer' and if the answer is yes#then that cannot be queerbaiting because thats a human person#apparently this is not a known fact anymore but even celebrities are human and have human emotions and human experiences#so sometimes their experiences appear to match yours and if your experience stems from your queer identity then often you can assume that#the celebrity in question is also queer#you may be right but you're probably wrong because you do not know that celebrity and have no way of knowing if they do not explicitly say#also its none of your business#anyway im annoyed at how many people dont know what queerbaiting is anymore#no jimmy solidarity and joel smallishbeans are not queerbaiting because they are FRIENDS and they are allowed to interact with each other#however they like because they are FRIENDS and they are not even remotely trying to hint that they themselves are queer or something#queerbaiting#queer#lgbtq#wren wrambles
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my attempt at a bunch of my fav artists styles :] idea by sootnuki!!
i would love to do more but this was already a huge challenge
if any artist here dislikes this/is uncomfortable with it/any reason i can take it down or turn off reblogs etc. otherwise i hope its ok 🫡 im not gonna tag anyone just gonna let it do its thing in the wild lol
#crunchchute art#my art#sam and max#sam & max#i hope it will be viewable as i dont know how much tumblr will crunch it#in any case i have it up on twitter also and it seems to be in good quality there#it looks like a 'the 7 human souls:' meme hfhdhf#hey i can put more thoughts in the tags right? so first i didnt really put enough effort into my own one and i kinda realized my style#is kinda mid ngl. cause im lazy + this coloring style might not really fit them. anyway.#for sootnukis style i adore the rendering of the clothing folds and stuff but i couldnt get it just right it remains a mystery to me#silcrow i tried to do a traditional drawing but kinda messed up some of the coloring especially on the pants#also couldnt figure out if its just markers or markers + pencils or what. so i kinda did my own take of 90% markers 10% pencils#mtsodie i love the color palettes and the shapes so that was a lot of fun to try; i like the outcome#narnour i absolutely love the tiny little eyes and how goofy and round they look so that was fun to try to replicate too#as well as the colors which i mostly color picked cause i couldnt get a red overlay right#zembo was a nice way to revisit a chalky brush that i havent used in ages not sure if i got it right though#applettoast i feel like theres some gorillaz influence or its at least something i used while coloring. as you might know i used to draw#gorillaz a lot and tried to replicate the coloring etc. and i think it fit here. correct me if im wrong lol#snuckeys was also hella fun cause i love the cartooniness and the details like the teeth showing gums and stuff. hope i did it justice#also the eyes! i love the big highlight and that the eyes are brown its cute#it was nice to branch out for a bit
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im so fucking tired of the disrespect gifmakers get on the gifmaker website
#kai.txt#negativity tw#(sorry these are gonna be a lot of tags. i have a lot of feelings and i dont know where else to put them)#we make gifs and nobody reblogs them#when they do get reblogged all people want to tell you is that your gifs arent good enough to them and rip it to shreds#'you're missing x' 'why didnt you do y' 'if i made this i would have abc' 'hey op ur wrong and this is why' 'i dont like this op'#reposters dont even reblog your fucking gifset but they'll save your gifs to repost later asking for how to do something#that they could have asked you how to do in the fucking first place#we reblog ourselves constantly because nobody else will and maybe to make our work look like it has more notes than it does#to make ourselves feel better about the lack of interaction we're getting#and then when we TALK about this frustration we have. people who are too afraid to say it to our faces#go on anon in our askboxes and tell us how we're somehow selfish for wanting people to interact with the sets#that we spent time on. hours. days. WEEKS in some cases#or we get anons who tell us the reason we dont have notes are because we arent good at gifmaking in the first place#but this is all on anon. because they're too scared to tell it to our faces#they're too scared for us to see that they ARENT a gifmaker and that they dont know how to do it any better either#they dont see us as people doing something we love as a hobby. they see us as content machines that dance like court jesters#im just so fucking tired of the disrespect#and this sentiment goes for more than just gifmakers. graphicmakers. artists. literally any creative hobby shared on this site#we get treated like shit and for what? literally for fucking what.
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You ever just see a Mouthwashing take that makes you want to bang your head into a wall? I literally just saw someone claim Curly couldn't have been emotionally abused by Jimmy before the crash because he was in a higher position of power than Jimmy.
-Shrimp Anon
The mouthwashing fandom has shown me that people genuinely do believe that certain types of abuse are not as detrimental as other types especially when they deem those immune/resistant, ergo, believing one is objectively worse no matter how it affects the person nor the intersections of power, history and dynamics at play.
Get ready cause this is a yap session:
Cause like it's heavily implied that Curly and Jimmy's friendship was toxic and abusive, pointedly in the direction of how Jimmy uses Curly's belief/comfort in him. Curly wasn't forced to enable Jimmy but he was emotional and mentally on edge around him in almost every scene in some way. Mental and emotional abuse are not contingent on what positions you have at work. Yeah, he's Jimmy's boss but he was Jimmy's friend first and it's like getting into Psych discussion to talk about how social power tends to overshadow any perceived organizational power in the human mind. People are concerned about their jobs ofc but they tend to hang onto and put more value/investment into their personal relationships, hence why there tends to be laws and restrictions around mixing the two.
I always see the sentiments that "Curly is a grown ass man", "Curly is bigger than Jimmy", "Curly is Jimmy's boss", "He just needed a backbone" as criticisms of Curly and while I do agree that on the surface level all of these to be true and viable ways Curly could've taken more control of the situation, I often look at the parallels of Anya and Curly as victims of Jimmy pre/post crash.
The way Jimmy talks to Anya post crash is how he talked to Curly in the pre-crash segments. It's hard to pin-point mainly because we know he hates and wants nothing to do with Anya compared to his contrary but similarly handled obsessions with Curly. It's a weird sort of "honey-moon" effect of abuse Jimmy does in terms of emotional and mental victimization. He is always horrid to Anya, always talking down or questioning her abilities and thoughts in a situation, this of course includes the harassment and assault. However, he has a moment of attempted gentleness/conditioning when he question her about the mouthwash when she's contemplating drinking it at the table. The key difference is he has no personal investment in Jimmy outside wanting nothing to do with him, meaning there is no sort of romanticized version of him that he can condition her off of. He knows this, hence, why he always reverts to trying to make her to scared to oppose him.
This sort of give and take of "kindness" doesn't work on her because she knows he is just doing it to take more from her than whatever he could possibly give but it reflects even the "softer" scenes between him and Curly where he always rewords or rephrases Curly's sentiments and concerns to sound more shallow. He is feigning a deeper understanding by reworking Curly's emotions into something bad and needing to be hidden. Everything is laced with envy and resentment, an outburst just around the corner, I mean he even slams the table in the birthday party scene, a tactic in emotional manipulation to set the victim on edge and cloud their ability to respond. Even if Curly knows Jimmy won't get physical in that moment, the physical actions is intended to make him back down in the confrontation in case it does. This is something that is just not person specific. It ingrains itself into how you interact with the world and life and it shows in major and minor ways with Curly.
Post-crash, the abusive nature is more in tandem to the physical victimization Anya went through and the stripping of voice and autonomy we see take place. Like the parasite in HFIM, Jimmy speaks for Curly most of the time and puts words in his mouth, similarly to how he takes Anya's plans as his own. He very commonly, with the both of them mind you, supplements the worst aspects of himself into them; pettiness, selfishness, lack of understanding... And tries to cover himself with their best qualities; kindness, planning, initiative, etc...
These parallel are just to say that positional power has little to do with if a person can be abused and how it can even be flipped to further the abuse. There is no doubt that Curly could've picked up on Jimmy's envy of his position hence another reason he never confronted him as a Captain but as a friend as doing so would immediately put Jimmy in a space to be confrontational/combative.
I think the disdain some people have when they talk about the heavily implied if not implicitly stated emotional/mental abuse Curly experienced being Jimmy's friend is when treating it as an excuse to why he didn't do more. I can understand that completely because it is not an excuse to why he didn't do more but is a very real reason people in his position in these scenarios can experience whether in the context of a work or social environment. However, I also think the way people talk about it really does demonstrate a bigger problem when talking about abuse when somehow who is/was abused is either part of the issue or enabled it.
Harkening back to the sentiments about Curly's inaction regarding Jimmy, I think the exact phrases I used/have seen show how there is an inherent belief that it is easier to overpower the effects of emotional/mental abuse that go in tandem with the perception of Curly as someone who should be able to. There is not an age you suddenly stop being susceptible to abuse nor a set point or low where you realize how it has affected you. You don't suddenly know to stand up or put a face on to face your abuser nor admit that you inadvertently enabled them to subjugate someone else to the same treatment. Maybe it's my psych brain but their is this growing belief that direct action is somehow easy or always the best method with the game shows you instances where it is not always the case. In real life that rings true too. He should have done more, but it's not impossible to see why he struggled to find a way or didn't even if it makes us mad.
It's not easy to suddenly gain a "back-bone". You don't immediately want to resort to aggression, especially if it mirrors the type you were a victim to. You don't want to believe you allowed yourself to be treated this bad, let it get that bad or allowed something bad to happen to someone else. It is easy to be in denial, to retreat to your thoughts or make excuses to avoid the painful truth. It's frustrating but in a way we know is relatable. It why we both hate and love Curly for it. We know we'd be better, we think we'd be better, we like to think we wouldn't falter in the same ways but it's always easier to say that from the outside looking in. It's easy to see what he was doing wrong because we are seeing it, not him, but the game really does make you picture what you would do if this was your raw reality and it's why this debate about Curly seems so never ending/contradictory. We can all say what we'd do but bottom line is that's much different when you're in the moment with all the emotions and human feelings attached.
I personally think Mouthwashing tackles the themes of rape culture, enabling, toxic masculinity, types of abuse and patriarchy in ways that are meant to deconstruct the typical straightforward views we mostly have of these concepts and how little subtilities of them are just as, if not more, detrimental than the overt/obvious parts. The game deals with the idea of little details and bigger picture in a way to show that sometimes the bigger picture is not the issue but the little details that make it up. It's why I have a personal dislike of depictions of Jimmy as the typical horrible person who would of course do something like this because the game is about noticing the little warning signs, the foreshadowing and foresight.
It's why I dislike the typical discussion of "bro code" and "boys will be boys" for the game because the game makes a point to avoid the standard depictions of such. It is about the type of men who still enable despite not condoning, agreeing or even perpetuating harmful beliefs because they can't see the little details or the ways it seeps into their everyday. The severity is not obvious to them as it was not obvious to Curly, Swansea or even Daisuke the way it was to a woman like Anya. There are little details about Jimmy that should ring alarms but if you are too naive like Daisuke, too distant like Swansea or too conditioned like Curly, they are just off markers.
There is 100% more constructive/concise ways to say "Curly was a victim of Jimmy's abuse on an emotional and mental aspect that clouded his judgements and perceptions in the scenario" while also critiquing on the side of "Curly still had a responsibility to protect Anya as a crew mate and Captain that he failed to do due to biases and stigma's he failed to surpass" without the weird condemnation people give him about should've knowing better than to let himself be manipulated by a person he considered a close, if not family/best-friend and had his own reasons to trust initially. Also stop being weird about victims of abuse in general with this fandom, like sorry not everyone has a like social epiphany the moment someone's nasty to them. People are treating it like you immediately know when you are in a toxic relationship immediately or comprehend when a person is actively dangerous and either it's your fault for not knowing how to leave/cut them off or you deserve it. Like the hypocrisy of people believing how certain fans treat the story reflect their irl views but not their own is crazy.
End statement is: I honestly don't even know man, I've been writing this too long and just like no man on that ship was perfect or really helped Anya when it mattered and I feel like pitting them against each other in discussion on who did the least or most or how it was justified sucks cause in the end Anya always did the most and best thing for herself.
#i also think it is because mouthwashing is first and foremost a game about rape culture and the patriarchy especially in work spaces#regarding women and centering conversation around Curly a man rubs people wrong because it does overshadow that commentary#but it still mixes other topics into its initial theming and message on how abuse conditions you to accept certain things that are harmful#and how getting used to a culture/enviornment does not mean you are happy healthy or most importantly safe in it. I personally like to#explore those aspects where it mixes all the themes so we can discuss the ways you have to watch out for things because there is a differen#in the idea Curly enabled Jimmy just because they were bros and because he was an example of another man afraid to step out from what#is a still oppressive system that does try to punish those who act against it even if they fall in the category of those who would benefit#from it as Jimmy and PE 100% represent that sort of misogynistic system where men that would be “good” are altered until they follow line#in a way both on the personal and professional level as PE is the corporate lock out and Jimmy represents the social and its just the issue#that the discussion of it sounds like “in defense of men” when I am more so trying to discuss how it is much deeper than men being scared t#upset other men but complacency is rewarded by not becoming another person subjugated hence as all the moments Curly does try to do#something we can tie it back to how Jimmy reacts and a possible penality from PE where we now need to address the ways to combat those#two concepts so we dont get cases like Curly or Daisuke or Swansea where male avoidance of the issue is considered neutral or even good.#i think most of this boils down the perfect victim mentality to where if someone who underwent or is being abused is not a perfect example#or accpetible type than their abuse can not be considered a valid or substantial reason for effects on their behavior compounded with the#fact that Anya's abuse at the hands of Jimmy is a systematic issue that Curly is a part of even if unwillingly and was more physically#violating and topical cause sometimes i have to remind myself that all media is still critiqued through the lens of the culture it came out#in cause i do think about what if this game came out inlike 2014 like the conversations would be sooooooo different could you imagine it?#but back the before statement Curly isn't perfect but I feel like boiling it down if hes a good person or man is not the point of the game#but more so good people can still be part of the problem and the idea of condemning a person for one act creates a false sense of#rightouesness and justice that does not aid the victim and in fact aids the abusers in escaping blame for their mulitple behaviors as we se#how the men on the ship tend to blame Jimmy for just one act against them including himself while there is a plethora of things Anya is#concerned about with Jimmy#and its not that Curly just made one mistake with Jimmy but more so we consider his actions more damning because he didn't stop Jimmy#instead of focusing on the fact Jimmy did what he did regardless of Curly and the consequence because we already know he's bad n maladjuste#which is problem in the conversation where the individuals are blamed but the system and perputrator are overlooked in a sense of acceptiab#complacency as we know how they are and the lack of tangibility to personally affect them on a larger scale like I should just make a post#on like cutting out the face when it comes it confronting systems of oppression rather than tag talking but just ask me to clarify if#you want that like im jus trying to say we avoid talking about Jimmy and PE so much cause it is obvious what they do wrong that we make#the initial and inherent problem out to be one aspect someone in this case Curly does and the the constraints they use to force actions
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reposting some old doodles i still enjoy a bit
#a doodley#guys im having realizations i dont really know what to do with#ive said this tons before but my main issue with art rn is like#i Know anatomy. and what it's Meant to look like. my issue is straying away from Correct and going with Good like how some of my stuff was#before i really started learning. loose and not restricted#but my obstacle is that nobody draws the way i want to draw. and im bad at coming up with my own stuff...i need to copy and osmose off#someone else. well. it turns out there is someone who draws the way i draw. and its cheye of the past.#dont get me wrong if i look thru the rest of the art in the (year) folder these came from; 80% of it sucks#i wish i cld have what past cheye had but with current cheye tweaks and refinement#but idk how to do that. something weird has happened to my mind i really cant envision and make art the same way anymore#idk how he did it back then....i wish i Knew bc current me cant make anything out of sketching or thumbnails or just going at it#arghhh#i try and force myself to draw stuff like this now (interactions) and it looks. so stiff. and bad proportion wise but idk how to fix it#which isnt to say the proportions (for example) in THESE drawings are perfect but they dont scream Wrong or Bad or Incorrect to me ykwim...#idk! idk what to do with this. ive never known how to go back and study my own stuff
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#iirc the datv embargo lifts in a few hours time#its exciting for sure!! ◕‿◕#(theres some good info out there about what u can expect etc)#everyones level of comfort/preference for spoilers or what they consider/dont consider spoilers or do/dont want to see beforehand#is different and thats valid#for me rn my pref is not seeing much more of the game than i have so far so i will probably not be watching/reading most of those bits of#coverage which are described as 'spoilery' due to this#im just at a stage personally where in the main the last thing I'd like to see now is just a good look at the CC and the CC options#and then just any of the more 'generic' stuff like any new official screenshots that get tweeted or if theres one more trailer or something#(know what i mean? maybe generic is the wrong word but like vague or general or something). and thats about it#so if i'm quieter on here or not postin about sth new that you've seen or focusing more on less-new stuff like V&V eps i didnt get a chance#to listen to yet or i dont know the answer to something etc thats why ^^#i've turned off asks and submit as well jic#sry for any inconvenience caused by that and for not following/posting everything in the coming weeks hh!!#its like a push and pull between wanting to be hyped with everyone/overanalyze every new crumb/wanting my blog to be useful and#not wanting to know much more about the game besides CC than i do atm hh#ultimately we will only get to go into this game and play this game for for the first time once so yea :D#(and in case it helps to know for your own curation purposes my datv spoilers tag is 'dragon age the veilguard spoilers'!!)#mj and the world
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87 donnie would never build something as boring and non-turtle themed as the modern smart phone
#rottmnt#tmnt crossover#tmnt#teenage mutant ninja turtles#87 donnie#rise donnie#art#my art#bulbasturtlesforever2#im sorry but my favorite thing to think about is these two donnies hanging out i dont know why i just love them#just like 'wait you didnt even have to BUILD a communication line for your brothers?'#'no you can just go to a store and buy a cellphone'#'you bought? you can earn money?'#'...yes. i earned money. totally. yep thats what i did. i would never do something like hack atms thats......wrong?'
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Got my hands on a Ultra Analysis BNHA book from a library
Some points I liked (I focused more on 1B since they don't get a lot of attention)
1B once had a Tetsutetsu BBQ. They heated him up and cooked food on him. He proceeds to ruin it when he declares his sweat is the salt to their food
Yui is canonically the prettiest first-year
Mineta has no sex appeal at all, but he thinks being a hero will make him lucky
Class B does respect Monoma. He's sharp-minded, witty, and has a way with words
Monoma sometimes wanders into 1A's dorm just to throw down a mean speech, and heads back to 1B
Juzo probably isn't helping Monoma's confrontations with 1A, since he just always asks him why he can't say it to their faces whenever Monoma complains about them
Shiozaki tries to be polite even in a fight
Pony hosts anime parties, so 1B knows a lot about anime. Vice-versa, they teach her Japanese, and everything nasty is Monoma's fault
Tokage was a gyaru
Tsuburuaba, Kaibara, and Kuroiro get worked up whenever they talk about girls
Manga likes Kenranzaki
Awase's family runs a small factory. He also restrains Monoma whenever Kendo isn't available
1B likes hearing Rin say "Aiyah", so he does it for them
Kamakiri is obsessed with cutting into things
Class B's play was really successful
Tamaki is scared of Kirishima's energy
1C was planning a send-off party for Shinsou for his upcoming hero transfer. They didn't doubt he would make it, ever since the Sports Festival
Shishikura (meatball Shiketsu boy) might've chosen Shiketsu because he likes the uniform's hat
Nakagame and Yo are dating
Tsuyu's family gets to spend a lot of time together now, since their parents' busy jobs have calmed down
Tsubasa (devil wing kid in Midoriya's memories) suspiciously lost touch with Midoriya and Bakugo in middle school (his Wiki page confirms Garaki - his grandfather - turned him into a Nomu)
Torino likes goofy gags. This rubs off on All Might (ex. when Midoriya thought he died when Torino fell with ketchup. People don't know whether to laugh or be concerned)
Nighteye has yellow streaks in his hair as a homage to All Might
Nezu likes worming into tight, dark places, so he likes Aizawa's scarf. They went into detail, describing why Nezu likes it, such as material to crawling in, etc.
Recovery Girl has to travel around Japan regularly to help people with her Quirk (as in, she uses her Quirk to help them. Healing Quirks are SO rare)
Hojo, Tabe, and Sestuno are kept in the same jail, so at least they're not separated
#wish i had vestiges other than nana but even she isnt a lot of info here#since the book ends with villains from the overhaul arc i think thats where the series was when the book published#im not doing the math but the book was 2019#also i am not tagging all these characters. thats gonna throw the limit on the floor and give me nothing to work with#1b#class 1b#1-b#class 1-b#spoilers#boku no hero academia#bnha#my hero academia#mha#mha spoilers#bnha spoilers#ultra analysis book#a limit of 30 tags and 1b alone is 20 ppl? no thank u#recovery girl's Quirk is actually the ideal typical heal ability you see on fantasy series#magically heal cuts and wounds? in a quirk-way we need a way to explain it#and recovery girl's quirk is the best way to explain it: she speeds up a body's healing process#thats just what happens when u use healing magic or something in a TV show#this was my explanation for why a pokemon cant use healing moves on broken bones (HC stuff for a fanfic) before i made the connection about#recovery girl being ideal in her quirk#because if u use it on a bone to speed up the healing. it might heal incorrectly or beclme cancerous instead#so recovery girl is just “natural healing of the body” rather than “i speed up ur bodys natural stuff”#so ur cells dont multiply so fast and wrong that u now have a tumor or cancer#do i know if these points are in their wiki pages? no. honestly im not going through their pages i just think these are interesting facts#neito monoma#hitoshi shinsou#yui kodai (yup tag limit immediately)
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sorry to be a bit of a hater but i do wish youtubers weren't so scared of making their videos just like, "reviews", whys everything gotta be a "video essay" all the time. every day my recommendations are filled with 40 minute videos titled "_____: An Underrated Masterpiece" where the first like five minutes are reading the wikipedia definition of "masterpiece" in a somber voice with dramatic themed text on screen. please just tell me how good or bad you think something is and use the rest of the runtime to explain why. you dont need to put on all these airs
#i know the ahem. channel. of some awe....... that whole situation kind of scared people off from using the word review#but like we live in the future now. you can make a review. i believe in you#AND LIKE i like a good video essay!! but im picky. because i read academic shit for fun#when i see a capital E essay im expecting theses. im expecting sub headers. im expecting multiple examples AND footnotes with asides#(and i know this is a controversial topic but i do expect them to be long. because if you read aloud a 4 page journal article its gonna)#(take a bit of time LOL maybe i just read too much academia shit. but i dunno man. theres not a lot you can say about like a big huge)#(topic with multiple angles if you only have like 10 minutes. maybe i just talk too slow. i need to breath <3 )#theres other formats too. surveys. retrospectives. informative essays. persuasive essays. etc#and like i also read lots of reviews not just of like movies and books but of like gallery exhibitions and shit!! they can be extremely#interesting a lot of work and some really beautiful writing!! nothing wrong with a review!!! theyre important#but i do get annoyed with like. the odd air of pretention i see in a lot of video essays. especially cause its usually not backed up by#the content. i dont care for those airs in academia either. nor do i like it in documentaries#just talk naturally. you'll find your voice. there might be pretention in it in the end but it'll be yours#if im making sense. i hear a lot of people talking in a pretention that is not their own. something they put on because thats what they#think they should do. you need to find your own pretention. be pretentious in a way that feels natural to youuuuuu#hell im being pretentious. about this LOL but like its my own. it is a pretentiousness ive built over the past half decade#play around. write a blog. i dunno. find your voice dear youtubers. find your voice
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I'm proud to say I don't think Luo Binghe would like to eat his boyfriends pussy. He'll do it but bitch he's not here for that. For 1 Binghe is absolutely the kind of guy who wants to see the whole body come undone not just have Shen Yuan tug on his hair. 2 the man's favorite places to kiss are things like forehead, hands, cheeks, he's a foreplay from the waist up man.
He'd fingerblast to next year granted but Shizun asks for a kiss and a downstairs buffet he says yes but in his head he's thinking about how much he just wants to massage and bite that man's shoulders/chest and touch every part of his skin till they're the same person. He needs to use his hands and teeth simultaneously and not doing so is bad for his health. Man can't dine on pussy alone. Shizun let me fingerblast you from the front while taking you from behind while I cradle you in my arms and scream how you love me!!!!! Shizun plssssssss!!!!
#svsss#svsss shitpost#scumbag system#bingqiu#90% a joke#and 10% ive yet to read a fanfic that convices me on that specific element#some men dont eat pussy#not because they hate women.#but because they branched on a different path on the skill tree and thats ok#shen qingqiu#shen yuan#sqq#luo binghe#i should mention that this applies more specifically to bingmei#bingge eats pussy as like the occasional treat#he likes it#thinks its great#but in my opinion hes like dissociating while muching down on the clambake#hes feeling it but hes not FEELING IT#what im saying is you should write a fic where SQQ knows something is wrong because his husband is way to enthuastic for oral#and usually thats HIS thing#im just saying realizing your husband is replaced by his evil alternate universe twin because hes doing good at sex is one thing#not realizing because theres no way hed ask on his own to eat you out like youre the#spread a golden corral on half price day is another
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thesis updates: sent the draft to my advisor -> she said it was "incoherent" and that she was "shocked" at my work and instead of telling me anything in detail as to what's wrong directs me to the writing center then proceeds to cc my committee members saying that she's at a loss with what to do with me -> was confused because... did i send her the wrong draft?? it seemed pretty solid to me?? like i was genuinely proud of it??? -> next day she sends me another email saying that actually my draft isn't bad at all and it just needs some reworking ???????
#you know what the problem is.#she's been telling me to write my thesis like a research article so i've been copying how it is in the articles she sends me#and so im like. clearly this isn't working if she's upset by this and didn't expect this. go rooting around my uni's websites to see#what the hell im doing wrong bc i must be doing something wrong but i dont know and my advisor wont TELL me what's wrong with the format#no examples of theses on the theses/dissertations page of my uni. knew that already but checked again#no examples of theses on the theses page of my program. knew that but double checked.#ended up rooting around for an HOUR and then stumbled upon a bunch of theses from my program#that is [1] not linked ANYWHERE on my program page or on the thesis page. [2] literally by good luck that i stumbled upon this cause it has#a bunch of MA theses from the past 20 years on here#read like 20 of them. realize that there's a specific format that my advisor just NEVER TOLD ME????? TO WRITE IN??#realize that i just kinda need to restructure my work a bit but it's actually not as bad as i expected#also. during my 'fake' defense last semester she was pissed at me about my charts but...everyone is using the format of charts i did ??????#oh. that's another thing. my advisor said that i 'defended' to the program coordinator even though i didn't actually defend anything and#she just told me flat out it was a no go so. lol.#anyways. it's. 4 am and im working on this stupid thing. im SO over it.#guys. im starting to fear im not the problem but my advisor is LMAO
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Jennifer nearly jumped into the water / and she was tired like no one's ever been tired
#myart#wesley crusher#jennifer is on her way home. then she remembers her life is like a nightmare!!!!#geniunelyyyy thinking about the post-first duty years of wesleys life is so miserable.#he killed his best friend and ruined his friendship with everyone else and lost picards respect (the only thing he ever cared about)#and then you just. dont hear about him at all for 2 years.#trying to capture the extremely specific existential dread of knowing something is deeply wrong in your life but not being able to change.#JUST THE LOOK OF A YOUNG MAN WHOS PROFOUNDLY UNHAPPY AND DOESNT EVEN KNOW WHY!!!#the quote from that novel. where he says “jaxa knew better than the rest of us the only way to escape this thing was to die”. ITS SICK!!#like leaving starfleet was not even on his radar until journeys end. he didnt even consider that as an option. so what could he do.#man. theres a reason for the prominently placed golden gate bridge. jennifer nearly jumped into the water.... cuz she got no way to get out#the photos in the bg are him and picard. jack. two of joshie (the ski tripppppp) him and bev and the entire nova squadron up top#do i think he would have his room this nicely decorated while horribly depressed NO!!! it was just for the compostion of the piece#like trying so hard to keep up appearances. being surrounded by pictures of all the people who love him and still not able to get out.#some of the papers lying around the desk are like. intended to be letters to bev that he just gave up on writing.#OKAY sorry i just wanted to finish this before i leave tomorrow. i spent such a stupid amount of time on this. never again#you people should always talk to me forever about my friend wesley . im soooo normal. lies facedown on floor#OH AND THE VERY SPECIFIC. EMOTION. LYING ON BED IN FULL UNIFORM. WE'VE ALLLL BEEN THERE.
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i have come here to personally thank you for giving me more than i asked for 🙏🏻 i am utterly grateful like IDJFKDKKFODOD 🧎♀️🧎♀️🧎♀️ it made me so happy the last doodle has my heart he is so cute i will eat him
also there is a DROUGHT out there for us noritoshi fans like im living on CRUMBS its insane and omg dont even talk to me abt how it feels like to be a kashimo and ino lover (altho they are getting a bit more love now) my nori is still underrated :/ sooo hence im asking ur hand in friendship and in exchange i promise to share my hcs with you abt nori my sweet lil meow meow we're in this together 💪🏻💪🏻
also since its October, do you think he likes horror movies? i feel like he can withstand gory movies but its the jumpscares that get him and he wont tell u he's scared when u watch one with jumpscares owkfkdkd imagine him hiding his face against ur shoulder or something 😭😭😭 (i used to do that with my dad when we watched horror movies and i used to be like im not scared😤😤 when he asked if i was lmfao thats where this hc stemmed from)
N. NORITOSHI HIDING IN YOUR SHOULDER OR SUPPRESSING HIS REACTIONS TO THE JUMPSCARES....... WAS IT AN INVOLUNTARY REACTION TO USE YOU TO HIDE??????? WAS IT BUILT UP TRUST????? DID HE GROW USED TO HOLDING ONTO YOU WHEN HE GETS SURPRISED BECAUSE HE WANTS TO MAKE SURE HE HAS HIS VALUABLES SAFE????????? WAS IT A MOMENT WHERE HIS MIND JUST INSTINCTIVELY GRABBED THE FIRST THING HE WANTED TO PROTECT/BE PROTECTED BY???????? OH MY FUCK.
he's probably used to gore and gritty stuff like that since he sees it often being a jujutsu sorcerer and all. not to mention his technique is literally blood. maybe he's desensitized to gore films, the most you'll get from him is a disgusted scowl.
BUT DID YOU SEE HOW QUICK HIS EYE OPENED WHEN HANAMI SHOWED UP BEHIND HIM. YOURE SO FUCKING FR ABT JUMPSCARES. Noritoshi is that guy who wouldn't scream or yelp but gasp really loudly and jump out of his skin.
i feel like they get him most in horror because of the music building up anticipation. if its one of those fake outs where the jumpscare comes a bit after, he's fucked UP. It makes him instantly miffed, as he tries to regain his composure. He swears he's not usually like this, it got him by surprise is all..!
Noritoshi is the type that'd only watch a horror movie if the story is rich and complex. He's the type of guy to like open endings that make you think.. if it's a guilty pleasure movie where all the protags make stupid decisions, he gets annoyed right off the bat.
He's groaning and complaining about how imbecile the characters are, but would still watch it with you because you personally invited him. If he's lucky you could fall asleep on his shoulder or [insert movie cliche here] how could he pass that up? But Noritoshi wouldn't be able to focus on you if he gets twice as annoyed because its a bad movie + jumpscares. it still startles him, but the movie is so terrible, he's embarrassed it got him, especially in front of you!!!
if you get involved and you tell him to quiet down, Noritoshi would shift his focus towards you. like that awkward guy who thinks he's being smooth and lowkey about how he cuddles up next to you. He wants to be the tough guy who's shoulder you can hide in, and he is!! just not.. with jumpscares.......
#noritoshi#noritoshi x reader#kamo noritoshi#kamo noritoshi x reader#noritoshi kamo#noritoshi kamo x reader#merry october#sO SORRY THIS WAS SO LATE AGAIN WDYM OCTOBERS ALMOST OVER FUKC SO THESE OCTOBER POSTS WILL LEAK INTO NOVEMBER. AHA.#FAM I WAS SPITBALLIN SO HARD W THE WRITING BUT FUCK IT OH MY GOD I LOVED THAT#ty back for the cat noritoshi idea btw. ill love you forever#the way i fell off my chair and scrambled to read the rest of this ask was insane. friendship.? im so awkward but i'll be here for u homie#i love noritoshi headcanons..#i eat them up like candy...#.... my cult member is moving up the unspoken ranks i made up while making this cult.....#as for ino and kashimo. i dont know much about them.#but i like the bits i do know! i like ino's energy.... he reminds me of an excitable puppy from what ive seen..#i may draw more characters if i grow obsessed. i mean infatuated. or if they make noritoshi look good.#or if you do a damn good job at convincing me#but unfortunately. i was persuaded into a blood pact with my second in command to wait for the anime to finish then watch it with him then.#back to nori though. we are definitely together in this. i fucking understand the drought. pinterest keeps giving me geto#and yes. hes good too. BUT NOT THE MEOW MEOW I'M SCAVANGING FOR#THATS NOT MY STUCK UP BABYGIRL WHO'D SCOWL AT ME FOR PRONOUNCING WORCESTERSHIRE SAUCE WRONG....#btw peep the orange for pumpkins or something#happy halloween my awesome cult#null rot
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