#hell im being pretentious. about this LOL but like its my own. it is a pretentiousness ive built over the past half decade

[bmpmp3]

sorry to be a bit of a hater but i do wish youtubers weren't so scared of making their videos just like, "reviews", whys everything gotta be a "video essay" all the time. every day my recommendations are filled with 40 minute videos titled "_____: An Underrated Masterpiece" where the first like five minutes are reading the wikipedia definition of "masterpiece" in a somber voice with dramatic themed text on screen. please just tell me how good or bad you think something is and use the rest of the runtime to explain why. you dont need to put on all these airs

[gayspock]

data!

omf fank u...

How I feel about this character he is my best fucking friends <3 SORRY I DONT- IM SORRY THATS NOT A VERY INSIGHTFUL TID BIT IS IT, OMG... but he is 😁

All the people I ship romantically with this character i like data/geordi a lot! i think it's cute, yknow.<3 inot so much a unique, novel answer- though i think, in general.... god, it's really hard to describe. because it's like- TO ME, data/geordi to me are a pairing where i dont always label them in my head. does that make any sense?? like- i'll call them boyfriends and besties cutely and whatnot, but im also just sort of like ... (draws a love heart around the options that say relationship status for them)

like, dont twist tht: i dont mean it (or at least, i dont intend to mean it) in like a SUPER PRETENTIOUS sense? like goodness... blah blah blah, these characters transcend romance, or that their bond is more particular than any others, blah... moreso- i feel like data himself, and relationships of any sort, will inherently be different. and thats ok! bc the world is inherently different for him, and its like hmm...

idk how to explain it that well, you see, but its not that i dont think data cant NOT feel romantic love- but rather i dot think he'd feel different "types" of love at all, or at least not as clearly as we do, or its in a different way than we do, or- whatever..... i suppose thats a very abstract take on it, and partially its like. FR my own self-projection, a another autistic little guy who also really doesnt understand romantic love or friendship as theyre described to me by others but i can have my own silly little confused takes on either and be like well its this. :) and idk i thnk thats jst how it is <3 and i understand other readings on him completely bc of that- i think its all interesting, how ppl see him....

BUT YAH. him and geordi, above all else...i think what they are for each other is just really fucking nice, you know? like- it is... IT IS babe, you know? just so lovely and nice. bc like they arent pre-determined soulmates nor are they in the fros of passion for one another, yet theyre quite perfect for each other in the same way its pretty perfect when you put a bit of peanut butter on apples..... love and light. i hope theyre happy together being besties.

My non-romantic OTP for this character

everything i said above with him and geordi BUT ALSO FUCK IT IUP DATA AND DOCTOR CRUSHER

anyway fr tho everyone is data's bestie i think. literally what i will say about data is i think literally his dynamic works very well with, like, everyone because he IS a particular type of character and i think his perspective and inquisitive nature do, like, lend themselves to encourage certain reflection from each individual - so long as they're open to him. i really enjoy almost all other dynamics he has with ppl pretty equally!? i guess with the exceptions of picard and pulaski- neither of those really.... brought much to the show, in my opinion.

My unpopular opinion about this character:

dont think i have any off the top of my head?

LOL. I GUESS I WILL SAY- i agree that, though hes one of my fave tng characters, i deffo think hes overrated in a specific sense of like.... ik some ppl will hold him up and fr fr insist that hes the BEST THE BEST THE BEST and soo true 😁💖 but like in all honesty i'd get irritated also if he wasnt my cup of tea and i was a tng fan, like help.

ALSO. i havent seen the tng movies. hell- i might... man, i MIGHT. maybe when my exams are done- i feel like... this will sound so goofy, but i try to wait for specific days for things tht will be important to me. :3 ik at some point data gets an emotion chip- and i dont think this is that unpopular at all, but i suppose that this will be my own opportunity to say that i fucking HATE that... like i dont have to see it. I HATE IT.

like- in general, i hate the emotion chip. even with it not in his head- the very notion of it is bullshit, nothing girl<3 as corny and as shitty as a narrative move as it would be, i'd rather it were a fucking placebo- some bullshit "the emotions were inside of you all along!!!<3" kind of move. bc like... i mean. well. they are. data already feels plenty- he differs only in exactly HOW he processes the world, how he was learnt it, etc...... to make him seamlessly human, i think that'd only make sense if you completely erased all sense of self he had and rebuild him to percieve more "humanly" from the ground up. it certainly shouldnt be a chip that you can stick in his head that can be turned on and off at will.

One thing I wish would happen / had happened with this character in canon

(strokes my chin) hmmm i am not sure. i'll think on it. i do- i do WISH... sigh. i dont know. i think its moreso a problem with tng and its format in general- i do kind of wish... there could have been more progression, yknow? in the sense of. mm. i wish characters actually WOULD-would understand him.

and its like- its like... sigh. i dont want ALL of them to. i think the way picard treats data? hell, i hate it- but it makes a hell of a lot of sense, and i think its realistic for him to be snappy with him. for him not to properly sit down and try to understand data- like that does... actually make sense to me, from what i get from picard as a person. unfortunately enough. and its like- im not "fine" fine with that, but i like it in terms of like. a character decision bc i actually do value some sense of honesty with that but then in comparison....

idk... theres some other characters who will be dismissive or irritated with him sometimes. and again- i suppose it is just... how people would BE, but its like. they will all insist they love him but then also fail to understand him and get mad when he starts going to funny decimal points and its like. nooo babes... ITS LIKE I GET IT- everyone will have their moments of frustration/irritation, and HELL even everyone will have their limits of understanding, but then its also... like idk. a lot of the time some ppl who rlly should, at a point, understand him will then make a comment at him that... just doesnt FIT right. and i think its moreso- HONESTLY, i think its moreso writers trying to get in a funny haha data is an android joke in which despite it just kinda being clunky to the scene and- EH. its annoying i guess. thats just what it is, sometimes.

[kinkymagnus]

20, 21, 25!!! for the ask game, please 💖 [also, hiii!!!]

thank you!!!! (also hii!!) i fuckign love video gaem im nerd

20 and 21. Book that would make a good game + Show/movie that would make a good game?

FUCK uhhhh first some reason my first thought was Artemis Fowl but I.... don’t think that would actually work. 

Okay, what’s really interesting is storytelling in different mediums, and one problem with taking a story that is written for a book or a show or a movie, is that it is written for that format. There are some that would make the transition pretty well, even though it might sacrifice parts of the story. Like, it’s harder to get thoughts or feelings a character has without awkward narration, and usually impossible to get good facial expressions or subtle body language cues and that kind of thing. 

I’m mostly talking written/screen to video game, but there are also notable differences between books and tv/movies that are probably why most adaptations are so infamously bad. Things like the amount of information that can be compressed for consumers of the media, the type of information such as inner thoughts/feelings and random worldbuilding details, and pacing. Both mediums have their strengths and weaknesses--the screen can be more immersive, and show you really cool ways of looking at things, and also allow for certain silent dialogue like body language or just more subtle implications (such as background characters behaving a certain way or expressions gone unmentioned) but also they can’t really do things that books can.

Video games have their own strengths and weaknesses, too. The interactive medium allows for all sorts of cool things you just absolutely cannot do in the same way in these other mediums. My favorite is probably environmental storytelling and the ways you can get stories across both purely from the setting around you (like in the Fallout game I forget the name of with the underwater city, or in Breath of the Wild with the ruins scattered around Hyrule, or basically all of Hollow Knight’s storytelling) and from little bits of scattered lore that you have to piece together into your own interpretation of what happened. (Again, Hollow Knight does this amazingly.)

So like, some stories can benefit from that, particularly either stories with a strong setting with good worldbuilding to base that on, or stories that would benefit from adding that yourself (although people might argue on whether it counts as canon or not).��

So the question is to really think about what kind of books, tv shows, and movies can benefit from being directly interacted with and even changed by the player, what ideas can play out through simple environments a player can move around or in small boxes of flavor text to be pieced together, what stories can be conveyed that can benefit from being actively sought out rather than directly fed to the person consuming them. Something like Artemis Fowl doesn’t work, because there’s a set linear narrative and the choices that are made rightfully should be set. While a game completely separate from the Artemis Fowl stories with its own characters simply set in Haven City could be really interesting (such as the life of a LEP officer who isn’t famous and tangling with humans constantly, or even the life of a dwarf or a goblin or whatever, perhaps even with multiple choices of class and species--?) it wouldn’t really be an Artemis Fowl adaption so much as a spin off or addition to the universe. It could be really interesting, as for a cool as fuck city of fairies Haven City isn’t really discussed or explored all that much, but it wouldn’t be a true adaptation. It’d be inspired by, if anything.

I honestly can’t think of any books/movies/tv shows off the top of my head that necessarily would make a good game. 

There are a few I could see being mildly fun--perhaps a sci fi survival game based on The Martian, a Mission: Impossible spy game, or (and I think this would be fun, tbh) a fantasy/mystery retrieval game based on The Librarians or Warehouse 13. I wouldn’t even mind seeing what a skilled game designer could do with A Series of Unfortunate Events, although I’d have no idea where to start. 

The problem is mostly those stories being kind of linear and set. The player can’t really affect them, so to be effective it’d be better if it was a new story entirely merely in that universe, rather than just an adaptation of the original canon. For example, playing Lord of the Rings simply would not be the same as watching it or reading it. There’s no way to really make it organic or have that same amount of emotion.

While it’s not impossible to have a linear set story for a player to follow (See The Legend of Zelda: Skyward Sword, which has issues, but is definitely playable and enjoyable) it’s not really the same if you not only know the whole story but feel like you’re not actually part of it. You can have quick time events to see if Bilbo really got the the ring, or a sequence where you play as Legolas mowing down orcs, but it won’t really be the same. 

Sorry for the long and unnecessarily pretentious answer, this is just something I’ve been really interested in lately so I overthought it like hell.

25. What power-up or ability would you want irl?

Real answer: shapeshifting. This is cheating as it’s more superpower than actually video game related, but like, still.

But answering more properly to the spirit of the question... The things that come to mind for me are Revali’s Gale (just fucking whooshes into the air lmao), Shape of Unn charm (turns into snail and wiggle lol), and Shade Cloak (nyooms through things by becoming a shadow).

Wait, actually, forget all that. I want to be Link from Link Between Worlds, turning into a painting and shit for fun. That sounds rad as hell. Look at me, I’m a cool funky little crayon drawing. Sike! I’m 3D now! 

[plainvanillapotato]

the 100 diaries S3 E1

quarantine diaries: june 20 2020

Season 3 episode 1: “Wanheda: Part 1″

chris? oof chris is dead

ok so this explains where the dead body went but where did these guys go??

murphy does not look good at all. he would do so poorly in quarantine. locked up murphy also reminds me of jess from breaking bad

what is going on. ummm 

too many people. thanos?? Dwight??

so they just did a time skip through john murphy?? they could have chose a more interesting character but also 86 days is nothing murphy. but i do i like how hes vlogging his experience tho. likes hes the shane dawson of the 100

oh my god! jaha is carrying murphy..lincoln and octavia who??? umm yes the ship is still strong even after the separation. 

what a way to start a season tho but like kinda in a bad way. murphy is not my favorite character so yeah this intro was not really for me.

ok so why was it closed in the first

looks like they’re sticking with the same intro :/

woah this is what i like to see! yes bellamy fight lincoln!!! reminds me of the sherlock home movie intro. 

ICE NATION?! are we going to meet Katara? 

look at kane with a beard talking about real peace lol ok kane with these writers i just know that this wont last

MONTY!! looking good in a uniform

jasper shaved his head?! awww maya

bellamy and this girl?? theyre just gonna throw in this ship with no build up?? bitch waht?? ok fine but im calling it rn i bet this girl dies just for bellamy’s character development cuz there’s literally no other point to having this girl. but i will admit it was cute that she gave him a book

i wonder how many takes the water bucket to the face jasper’s actor had to do

hey hey hey chill jasper dont do that to my boy monty

lol i love jaspers salute into slapping bellamy like was that in the script or did the actor just come up with that on his own either way it was good

on the contrary raven i think that prettyboy bellamy is too good for her/whatever her name is

woooooow jasper blames monty? come on bro it was mostly bellamy and clarke

really who gave octavia a horse? but also since when did she learn how to horse ride because she her as hell didnt learn that on the ark

arkadia?? because of the ark?? ok

look at jasper just being an emo boy with his earbuds in. but also is that an ipod shuffle??? is raven steve jobs now? or where the heck did jasper get it?

what was that look jasper had with raven? ....ship?

wait that arm touch while miller sings let me make love to you...monty and miller a ship? you know what i ship it! 

aww and look at bellamy with a smile kinda reminds me of this cat

this scene is just giving me all the feels!! i love it! 

i gotta say tho i still really dont like octavia. i hate her even more on a horse i just find it pretentious 

bellamy said screw protocol. love this chaotic energy. whatever the hell we want he said

but also bellamy said millers boyfriend?? waht?? so that like means that monty and miller might actually be come a thing tho right??? sorry not sorry that im literally shipping everyone with everyone

i dont like murphys hair now either. way too much gel

what a waste of an apple. that wasnt necessary at all murphy

we’re all kings said jaha. yes i like this attitude

stop it jaha. i dont think you can justice killing that many people

imo this is a very solid group even with octavia. like this is my favorite squad so far it has all my favorite characters bellamy, monty, miller, jasper, and raven (yeah thats right octavia is not my favorites list and neither is clarke)

the ice people with the white war paint remind me of that one racist movie that johnny depp was in 

woah there jasper pretty bold and reckless there

lmao bellamy yells hold your fire after shooting the first shot

umm okaY OCTAVIA. nice throw.

oo bellamy said monty youre with me. yes yes yes monty and bellamy are my dream duo

what a beautiful black panther...what the heck clarke. clarke really is a crazy bitch to hunt a black panther 

also i really hate her hair rn. like im getting such bad vibez but also clarke really became fluent in 3 months??? huh?? what is that about?

ooo the wristband. 

if raven couldnt get down from the horse how did she get up there in the first place??

clarke is wanheda the commander of death umm really this is what the grounders think of clarke

that is not a good picture of clarke its like flynn rider and his wanted posters

question: i thought only the warriors knew english so why does this merchant know english 

contraceptive implant removals??? calm down jackson that isnt a life or death procedure. but also damn these people really want to bring in new life into this crazy world?

side note where the hell is wick???

yeah abby fix yourself. preach raven

clarke and niylah... waht?? also the music choice for this scene was straight up weird. like watch the scene and tell me that it wasnt weird

octavia what is this?? octavia stop being salty bitch to lincoln. this is just such a weird dynamic. also octavia if youre gonna tell lincoln that “you can wear their jacket. but you’ll never be one of them” can you please fucking apply this about you really want to be a grounder. such a hypocrite

why does jaha need him? cuz it doesnt seem like murphy has an skill other than keeping himself alive

“pain hate envy those are the abcs of me”-murphy. who is this guy Eminem??

emori?? murphy is like i really dont want to go with jaha but i really into this girl shes the only person that doesnt hate me.

is that shaw mendes?? like is that really him because to be honest shawn mendes has a common face? i really dont know and i dont feel like looking it up. if it was a cameo then it was as weird as ed sheeran popping up in game of thrones

really octavia really. sleeping on the ground underneath the night sky?? bitch who do you think you are? you’ve been on the ground for less than a year and youre acting as if this grounder culture is all that you are. I also don’t like how she is trying to be more “grounder” than lincoln who literally grew up in that culture. idk guys i just get really weird vibes. 

oooo get’em jasper that music was annoying me too

side note: but also who the fuck taught these kids how to drive a car cuz its not like anyone on the ark knows how to?? i get that its easy to drive a car but honestly my real beef is that we dont see them learning how to drive cuz i think that it would be funny af...unless please tell me they have flashbacks to them learning how to drive. if not, we were robbed.

great job clarke way to get yourself caught

this is the weakest season opening for this show ever like i gotta say that i really dont like this direction of this season rn

[sugarfreerooibos]

one day i will shut the fuck up but today is not the day— i have now graduated to soliloquies in tags to proper monologues in reblogs. in addition to these bullshit posts. every day my character becomes simultaneously more and less insufferable. i am in hell lmfao. if i try to decrease my ego, then i end up hating myself SO fucking much, but when I try to hype myself up my fucking. narcissistic tendencies pop back up and arrogance goes apeshit. this was originally gonna be like. a one sentence semi-shitpost but i guess its a vent hell yeah (ugh). im fucking. decent at a lot of things sure? but ive always had a fucking insatiable need to be the best possible, such as fucking being upset at myself for not accomplishing shit like einstein or newton or all them. hell not even just stem shit. im not the Most Profound Person You Will Ever Meet, im just a pretentious ass who knows too much data for their own good. hell the thing id say im best at is shit in the clinical psychology dept, which yeah im pursuing but honestly. whats the fucking point of that? ok sick i understand peoples trauma responses and can figure out how it linked to their childhoods big fucking deal lol?????? its. the need to be remembered i guess. or maybe its more selflessly selfish with wanting to help others just to feel the satisfaction. But if thats the case, wouldnt all emotions and actions be selfish? well yeah but. i digress lmao. i just wish i could do something that could affect more people, bc no matter how knowledgeable i get about the subject im passionate about, theres practically no chance of me helping more than a few handfuls of people. i just. ugh i dont know im not even gonna read this back over before posting, ignore how scattered it is.

[breathingwithdifficulty]

im so fucking done of being stuck in the house with my own sister and it’s becoming very clear that her abusive tendencies haven’t really gone away. she has been commenting on what i eat and what i do during the day (which is not a whole lot but... it’s quarantine. sorry for actually listening to social distancing rules unlike everyone in my house and most of the people in my town). she knows im depressed but her constant negativity and criticism isn’t helping. the whole unfairness of our relationship has become really clear. i basically wait on her hand and foot and when i don’t do something she asks of me, she gets pissed and calls me “lame” or berates me like “its not even that hard” or just “seriously? it’ll take two seconds” like damn bitch do it yourself then. im not your servant just because im your nice little sister.

i don’t ever ask anything of her. literally can’t remember the last time i asked her to do anything for me. i only ever tell her to do stuff like “leave me alone” and “stop messing with that” and “please stop, seriously” and “that hurt” (physically or emotionally) and she NEVER i mean NEVER fucking listens. she doesn’t care. she thinks it’s funny to tease me and torment me and irritate me and then blames me for being too sensitive when i finally snap at her because im pissed off. damn, maybe if you weren’t making it hard for me to breathe by suddenly jumping on me and refusing to get up and leave me alone, i wouldn’t have to push you on the floor and yell at you to get out. maybe if you weren’t constantly hypocritical, i wouldn’t be so irritated with you all the time.

we both have to do our homework at home now which isn’t that big of a deal for me since i can focus a lot better than she can and i know that. but she’s so incredibly inconsiderate. she needs complete silence when she’s doing her homework and says it’s distracting for me to even walk past her when she’s working. so i stay silent. i put headphones in to listen to videos or zoom calls and i warn her if i have to record or talk. i try not to get up and get food or use the bathroom too often. im more than considerate.

however, whenever im doing my homework, she’s facetiming her friend, being on zoom calls without headphones and with the volume on high and her talking at full volume (EVEN AFTER i offered her to use my headphones for her calls multiple times because it’s distracting for me and she was like “of course im not gonna use headphones, that would look silly” like bruh) and singing and talking and literally SCREAMING. like wordless, just screaming because she gets frustrated with her work. bro, i get it. but shut the hell up. god, she would kill me if i did some of the things she does to me while she was working. id literally get cursed and yelled at.

she asks me pretty frequently if i think she’s a good person. i think she’s a good person sometimes. i think she’s too sensitive and can’t take any sort of criticism and lashes out at me because she thinks im pretentious and bratty. she’s straight up told me that she used to resent me (starting from when i was literally a BABY) and still kind of does. she says im much better than i used to be. the only reason she thinks that is because i stopped putting up as much of a fight against her. if i ever say something sassy or rude or even just defend myself, she claims im a dickhead brat who’s spoiled and has a bad attitude. really she’s just a sensitive little bitch.

ive lost four pounds in the past couple weeks because ive been eating less by tracking my calories. i haven’t really been eating a whole lot better but i think four pounds is a pretty good start considering how this is the first time ive really tried and committed to losing weight. but even my sister doesn’t think that’s enough.

i eat a bagel with cream cheese for breakfast. she walks up and says “you know, a bagel is equal to like 5 slices of bread.” yes i know. you’ve told me already this week. you told me a month ago. you keep telling me. im just trying to eat, dude, back off and stop trying to make me feel bad because im not eating fruit smoothies and salad and avocado toast like you are. i get it, you’re skinny and healthy and like to pretend you don’t know it but you and i both know that you do. call yourself fat all you want, but my friends have literally asked if you’re a model, you have maybe an inch thick of stomach fat, i can feel the bumps of your spine when i touch your back, and i can see your ribs when you stretch your arms up.

she knows it makes me feel bad when she calls herself fat and she does not care in the slightest. she’s like “oh im getting pretty chunky oh boy” and then ill make a comment about feeling fat and she’ll be like “oh you’re not fat” like bruh i know you think you’re chunky and i have a lot more fat than you do don’t lie to me.

she told me it makes her feel worse about her hairline when i comment about how im insecure about mine. so i stopped saying anything about it. i told her it makes me feel bad when she comments on how im not doing basic things right (cutting an apple, cleaning the bathroom, vacuuming, sweeping. all real examples of things she says im not good at and calls me stupid. how the fuck is someone BAD at sweeping? the floor’s clean now isn’t that what matters?) and she said “well practice makes perfect” and i told her it makes me feel even worse about myself and she was just like “well you don’t know how to clean and you need to learn.”

i know how to clean. ive cleaned my room. ive cleaned the kitchen. ive cleaned our shared bathroom (she came home when i was just finishing up after deep cleaning it and even doing the parts she said she would do because i was just that nice. she immediately criticized me and said i had cleaned with the wrong cleaner and needed to reclean the whole thing again. i said no because that’s ridiculous and it was about to turn into a fight so like the pushy i am i gave in and cleaned. the whole. bathroom. again. but with a different cleaner that wasn’t “greasy” and “only for oil and grease, not bathrooms” and “smelled bad” because that really matters in the long run i guess). i just don’t do it the quickest or maybe the most efficient or the way she would do it but literally WHO CARES. if the floor is swept why does it matter that i didn’t do it as fast as you would. goddamn.

she came into my room while i was drawing on my digital tablet today. i showed her how it worked and everything and she asked to see something that id drawn and i said no (ive never been comfortable showing my art to other people that aren’t strangers online (lol) and she has consistently taken sketchbooks directly from my hands or gone through them when i was in a different room despite me telling her multiple times not to) and she kept asking for a reason and i just said i didn’t want to. she kept interrogating me and i was like “i don’t know what you want me to say” and she was like “i want a logical answer why you won’t show me” and of course i didn’t really have one and so i was just like “i don’t really have one, i just don’t wanna show you because it makes me uncomfortable” and she got pissy and left. fine, leave, don’t want you in here anyways. stop being so offended that you don’t get unfiltered access to everything in my life.

she’s a biology major. im trying to decide on a vague idea for my future major and i can’t remember how it was brought up but i said something about going into STEM and possibly biology and she was like. “aw don’t do that. i mean if it really makes you happy then go ahead but ill be upset and probably a little pissed.” which okay i get that a bit (eh) but ive never even thought about going into bio so she doesn’t have to worry and i told her as much. and then i asked why she wouldn’t want me to and she was like “because everyone knows you’d be better than me at it and i just want to have like... my thing” (i get that too (but maybe if you did your work on time and actually went to class then you’d be better at it. but whatever)) and i said i probably wouldn’t be better but i get that or whatever. and then i think she made a joke and i laughed and she was a few seconds later like “why do you look so smug? like you’re happy about the fact that i think you’re better than me” and i was like “that’s literally not true” and she was like “everyone likes feeling like they’re smart and you feel like you’re better than me and you’re smug about it” (or something like that) and i had to convince her that not i literally do not and am not smug. damn bitch, insecure much? that pissed me off that she would think that low of me to assume that i ENJOYED her insecurities and felt like i was smarter than her. wow. ive told her countless times in depth and with detail that i believe we both have strengths and weakness and neither of us are better than the other, and she still doesn’t believe me. but whatever.

it’s constant, little things like that. ive always managed to let a lot of them slide and that is one of the only reasons she thinks im such a good sister. that and i lie to her a lot about how i feel about her. she says stuff like “im surprised you haven’t killed me in my sleep yet, you’re too good to me, ive been terrible to you” but still continues. but whatever. ive only been waiting for her to move out for four years now, i guess i can wait a few more months (hopefully only that).

she says she’ll get pissed if i don’t call her every week once we aren’t living together and so i say i will but. i don’t want to. i don’t want to tell her about my life and my worried just to have her criticize them or say im being ridiculous. i don’t want to have to live like this forever. im so tired. so so tired.

im not saying it’s all bad. sometimes our donut runs at 2am are nice. and sometimes she is interested in what im doing when no one else is. sometimes, she gives good advice. sometimes we talk for hours on end. she’s one of the first people i go to when im having problems with me my mom. i trust her with somethings. it’s not all bad

but her constant emotional and verbal abuse has shaped me into a scared, pushover little girl with insecurities, trust issues, and guilt. she’s always said i was the favorite and laughs now and says “i think me being mean to you when we were younger was good for you, it too you down a few pegs so now you’re not so spoiled.” it also traumatized me and gave me self esteem issues, but yeah, haha, at least im not a spoiled brat (but to you, i still am, but only when i don’t do what you want or say what you want me to say). thanks for that.

anyways, it’s been a while since ive made a long rant. it’s past 4am and i woke up at 2:30pm today so it’s probably time to sleep and dread waking up in the morning. nice.

4.18.20 4:22AM

[uncvtgems]

✩ binch

im so tired

                         Cliff/Naomi — 

DISAGREEMENTS:

Who is more likely to raise their voice: NaomiWho threatens to leave but never actually does: CliffWho actually keeps their word and leaves?: Naomi, but not for very longWho trashes the house?: Both of them, but I feel like Cliff is the only one who cleansDo either of them get physical?: nahHow often do they argue/disagree?: not very often (lol @ us when we said they’d never argue, and then they fought in our next thread)Who is the first to apologise?: Cliff

SEX:

Who is on top?: eitherWho is on the bottom?: this is a dumb question (see above)Who has the strangest desires?: CliffAny kinks?: yeah Cliff likes to play Drake’s Take Care on loop and Naomi’s probably into being choked lol she wildWho’s dominant in bed?: Naomi Is head ever in the equation?: I meeeean, I’d assume so, lmaoIf so, who is better at performing it?: Naomi? bruh idkEver had sex in public?: Naomi’s probably wanted to but Cliff hits with the “no wtf we’re not animals” Who moans the most?: NaomiWho leaves the most marks?: Naomi Who screams the loudest?: Naomi, lmaoWho is the more experienced of the two?: not CliffDo they ‘fuck’ or ‘make love���?: l-u-v bc they’re lameRough or soft?: ummm bothHow long do they usually last?: a crisp 45 minutes, maybe an hourIs protection used?: r u crazy, yesDoes it ever get boring?: nahWhere is the strangest place they’d have sex?: apartment balcony? we just don’t know

FAMILY:

Do your muses plan on having children/or have children?: don’t have any, don’t plan to, but shit happens I suppose If so, how many children do your muses want/have?: Cliff probably wants one, idk manWho is the favorite parent?: NaomiWho is the authoritative parent?: CliffWho is more likely to allow the children to have a day off school?: Naomi, but Cliff would be okay with it too lbrWho lets the children indulge in sweets and junk food when the other isn’t around?: CliffWho turns up to extra curricular activities to support their children?: Cliff, and Naomi when she can Who goes to parent teacher interviews?: both (I guess)Who changes the diapers?: Cliff, or quite honestly, the nanny Who gets up in the middle of the night to feed the baby: they take turnsWho spends the most time with the children?: CliffWho packs their lunch boxes?: um themselves (or Cliff probably) Who gives their children ‘the talk’?: NaomiWho cleans up after the kids?: a maid, tfWho worries the most?: CliffWho are the children more likely to learn their first swear word from?: both lmao

AFFECTION:

Who likes to cuddle?: bothWho is the little spoon?: Naomi, but sometimes Cliff Who gets naughty in the most inappropriate of places?: Naomi Who struggles to keep their hands to themself?: both (lame)  How long can they cuddle until one becomes uncomfortable?: trick questionWho gives the most kisses?: Cliff What is their favourite non-sexual activity?: this thingWhere is their favourite place to cuddle?: anywhere smh i hate themWho is more likely to playfully grope the other?: Naomi How often do they get time to themselves?: basically whenever Naomi’s in town/when they become hermits 

SLEEPING:

Who snores?: neitherDo they share a bed or sleep separately?: shareIf they sleep together, do they cozy up together or lay far apart?: cozyWho talks in their sleep?: NaomiWhat do they wear to bed?: Naomi wears literally lingerie, and we just dont know what Cliff wearsAre either of your muses insomniacs?: Naomi’s a crackhead, you tell meCan sleeping pills be found by the bedside?: its lit so yeahDo they wrap their limbs around each other or just lay side by side?: they’re re: getting cozyWho wakes up with bed hair?: NaomiWho wakes up first: CliffWho prepares breakfast in bed for the other?: Cliff What is their favourite sleeping position? real close and tangled up with each other Who hogs the sheets?: NaomiDo they set an alarm each night?: nahCan a television be found in their bedroom?: yes, but only to watch movies with each otherWho has nightmares?: uh Cliff idkWho has ridiculous dreams?: NaomiWho sprawls out and takes up most of the bed?: NaomiWho makes the bed?: neitherWhat time is bed time?: whenever my dudeAny routines/rituals before bed?: weed and a movie, or s/tWho’s the grumpiest when they wake up?: Naomi

WORK:

Who is the busiest?: NaomiWho rakes in the highest income?: NaomiAre any of your muses unemployed?: noWho takes the most sick days?: neither??Who is more likely to turn up late to work?: NaomiWho sucks up to their boss?: CliffWhat are their jobs?: Naomi’s a model, Cliff’s a tattoo artistWho stresses the most?: they’re chillin Do your muses enjoy or despise their careers/occupations?: Naomi’s whatever about her’s, Cliff loves hisAre your muses financially stable?: hell yea

HOME:

Who does the washing?: CliffWho takes out the trash?: CliffWho does the ironing?: CliffWho does the cooking?: if making instant noodles counts, then CliffWho is more likely to burn the house down just trying?: NaomiWho is messier?: NaomiWho leaves the toilet roll empty?: neitherWho leaves their dirty clothes on the floor?: NaomiWho forgets to flush the toilet?: neitherWho is the prankster around the house?: both, but mostly Cliff Who loses the car keys when it comes time to go somewhere?: Cliff Who mows the lawn?: lol what lawnWho answers the telephone?: bothWho does the vacuuming?: CliffWho does the groceries?: Cliff Who takes the longest to shower?: NaomiWho spends the most time in the bathroom?: Naomi

MISCELLANEOUS:

Is money a problem?: lol noHow many cars do they own?: none atm, but probably several in the futureDo they own their home or do they rent? ownDo they live near the coast or deep in the countryside?: neitherDo they live in the city or in the country?: cityDo they enjoy their surroundings?: yeWhat’s their song?: east atlanta santa  What do they do when they’re away from each other?: facetime a lot tbhWhere did they first meet?: at Kit and Teagan’s, probably How did they first meet?: their dads pushed them together Who spends the most money when out shopping?: Naomi Who’s more likely to flash their assets?: Naomi Who finds it amusing when the other trips over?: bothAny mental issues?: don’t think soWho’s terrified of bugs?: neitherWho kills the spiders around the house?: NaomiTheir favourite place?: the clurb, or their apartment honestly Who pays the bills?: NaomiDo they have any fears for their future?: Cliff might (like thinking Naomi doesn’t love him the same way he loves her, yikes) but she doesn’t Who’s more likely to surprise the other with a fancy dinner?: bothWho uses up all of the hot water?: NaomiWho’s the tallest?: Cliff Who’s more likely to just randomly hop into the shower with the other?: NaomiWho wanders around in their underwear?: Naomi Who sings the loudest when singing along to the radio?: NaomiWhat do they tease each other about?: Naomi teases him about his nameWho is more likely to cringe at the other’s fashion sense at times?: NaomiDo they have mutual friends?: more like mutual frenemiesWho crushed first?: Cliff Any alcohol or substance related problems?: oh boyWho is more likely to stumble home, drunk, at 3am?: both, or Naomi’s drunk and he’s helping her home Who swears the most?: tough call 

                      Maya/Jett – 

DISAGREEMENTS:

Who is more likely to raise their voice: MayaWho threatens to leave but never actually does: JettWho actually keeps their word and leaves?: MayaWho trashes the house?: both, but like, with artsy shit Do either of them get physical?: noHow often do they argue/disagree?: hmmm only every .02 seconds (though its more like Maya rolling her eyes at everything he says)Who is the first to apologise?: not Maya 

SEX:

Who is on top?: MayaWho is on the bottom?: hmmm idk u tell me Who has the strangest desires?: Jett, idk, he’s kinda weird Any kinks?: yea Maya’s kink is when he doesn’t talk Who’s dominant in bed?: MayaIs head ever in the equation?: sure If so, who is better at performing it?: Jett, but only because Maya doesn’t like doing it Ever had sex in public?: Maya loves herself (but maybe)Who moans the most?: MayaWho leaves the most marks?: Jett probs to piss her off Who screams the loudest?: neither Who is the more experienced of the two?: even playing fields my guy Do they ‘fuck’ or ‘make love’?: fuckRough or soft?: rough How long do they usually last?: we just dont know Is protection used?: re: r u crazyDoes it ever get boring?: ehh no Where is the strangest place they’d have sex?: art show

FAMILY:

Do your muses plan on having children/or have children?: no and noIf so, how many children do your muses want/have?: idkWho is the favorite parent?: JettWho is the authoritative parent?: MayaWho is more likely to allow the children to have a day off school?: MayaWho lets the children indulge in sweets and junk food when the other isn’t around?: JettWho turns up to extra curricular activities to support their children?: bothWho goes to parent teacher interviews?: both Who changes the diapers?: bothWho gets up in the middle of the night to feed the baby: again, bothWho spends the most time with the children?: Maya, idkWho packs their lunch boxes?: every man for themselves Who gives their children ‘the talk’?: MayaWho cleans up after the kids?: neither Who worries the most?: JettWho are the children more likely to learn their first swear word from?: Maya

AFFECTION:

Who likes to cuddle?: lol neither Who is the little spoon?: Maya Who gets naughty in the most inappropriate of places?: Jett Who struggles to keep their hands to themself?: neither  How long can they cuddle until one becomes uncomfortable?: literally 10-15 minutes Who gives the most kisses?: Jett, idkWhat is their favourite non-sexual activity?: being pretentious art hoes Where is their favourite place to cuddle?: nowhere Who is more likely to playfully grope the other?: MayaHow often do they get time to themselves?: sometimes 

SLEEPING:

Who snores?: JettDo they share a bed or sleep separately?: share ocassionaly If they sleep together, do they cozy up together or lay far apart?: start out spart, end up together Who talks in their sleep?: Maya What do they wear to bed?: both wear t-shirts probably Are either of your muses insomniacs?: don’t think so Can sleeping pills be found by the bedside?: nopeDo they wrap their limbs around each other or just lay side by side?: side by sideWho wakes up with bed hair?: JettWho wakes up first: MayaWho prepares breakfast in bed for the other?: neither, or maybe Jett. who knows. What is their favourite sleeping position?: ?? we dont knowWho hogs the sheets?: bothDo they set an alarm each night?: noCan a television be found in their bedroom?: nahWho has nightmares?: maybe bothWho has ridiculous dreams?: Maya Who sprawls out and takes up most of the bed?: Jett (Maya’s too tiny for that)Who makes the bed?: MayaWhat time is bed time?: like 5amAny routines/rituals before bed?: noWho’s the grumpiest when they wake up?: Maya

WORK:

Who is the busiest?: neither lbrWho rakes in the highest income?: again, neither lmaoAre any of your muses unemployed?: no, but are they really employed anywayWho takes the most sick days?: u can’t take a sick day from artWho is more likely to turn up late to work?: MayaWho sucks up to their boss?: Jett What are their jobs?: Maya’s an artist, Jett’s a photographer (supposedly), and both students Who stresses the most?: they’re chillin Do your muses enjoy or despise their careers/occupations?: they’re both annoying n passionate Are your muses financially stable?: i mean, their parents are 

HOME:

Who does the washing?: MayaWho takes out the trash?: JettWho does the ironing?: neither Who does the cooking?: its about the take out lifeWho is more likely to burn the house down just trying?: JettWho is messier?: MayaWho leaves the toilet roll empty?: neitherWho leaves their dirty clothes on the floor?: JettWho forgets to flush the toilet?: neitherWho is the prankster around the house?: i mean, Maya can’t take a joke soWho loses the car keys when it comes time to go somewhere?: MayaWho mows the lawn?: whats a lawnWho answers the telephone?: bothWho does the vacuuming?: JettWho does the groceries?: MayaWho takes the longest to shower?: JettWho spends the most time in the bathroom?: its about the same 

MISCELLANEOUS:

Is money a problem?: some whatHow many cars do they own?: zeroDo they own their home or do they rent? rentDo they live near the coast or deep in the countryside?: neither?Do they live in the city or in the country?: cityDo they enjoy their surroundings?: sureWhat’s their song?: ill have to get back to uWhat do they do when they’re away from each other?: chill Where did they first meet?: on the streets How did they first meet?: Maya started painting him without asking #classis Who spends the most money when out shopping?: JettWho’s more likely to flash their assets?: hm neither Who finds it amusing when the other trips over?: both but especially Maya Any mental issues?: don’t think soWho’s terrified of bugs?: neitherWho kills the spiders around the house?: Jett Their favourite place?: somewhere annoying Who pays the bills?: bothDo they have any fears for their future?: probs about getting jobs idekWho’s more likely to surprise the other with a fancy dinner?: good questionWho uses up all of the hot water?: MayaWho’s the tallest?: JettWho’s more likely to just randomly hop into the shower with the other?: Jett Who wanders around in their underwear?: MayaWho sings the loudest when singing along to the radio?: neither smhWhat do they tease each other about?: she teases him about everything Who is more likely to cringe at the other’s fashion sense at times?: bothDo they have mutual friends?: do theyWho crushed first?: hmAny alcohol or substance related problems?: nah we’re good Who is more likely to stumble home, drunk, at 3am?: Maya Who swears the most?: Maya