#i don't think i will change my mind about this situation so it will be pointless to justify reim's actions to me

[hoahoahoahoahoa]

I’m not quite done with this idea but i don't think i'm in a place to sit down and write a fic so i'll just word vomit here

First of all, my two fav side effects of this AU:

Not only does Edward not have the edge on Bella that he has on everyone, but she has that edge on him. He's forced to be vulnerable to her the same way everyone but her is forced to be with him. He's getting a taste of his own medicine in the worst way. (not that he's invading others' privacy on purpose most of the time, but it is what it is)

2a. Edward does a lot of romanticizing Bella, because he can. She's the one person onto whom he can project. It sounds nastier than it is-- that's how all relationships are to some degree, especially at first before you get to know the person. The difference is how much of a novelty this is for Edward. Finally, he can get to know someone at a normally pace, not privy to private events they don't mean to share. He goes a little overboard idealizing her because she's the first mystery he's had in a long ass time. Except now... Bella can catch him doing it.

2b. Bella's got the reverse now. She gets all Edward's dirty laundry from the jump. She meets him at his very worst... and she sees him rise above it, and how quickly he turns around.

Okay busting out my copy of Midnight Sun for this play-by-play of the first book:

Obviously a big plot change is Bella knows Edward is a vampire from day one. Even if she doesn't clue in from anything she hears from him in the cafeteria (she might not even fully realize what's happening in the cafeteria; maybe Bella's telepathy doesn't have as long a range as Edward's b/c she's human and also "borrowing" the gift), it's super obvious as soon as her scent hits him in Biology.

She's frozen in place from the shock of suddenly having telepathy + the revelation that vampires are real + Edward's a telepath (that can't hear her?) + the sheer violence in Edward's thoughts. She manages to gather her thoughts enough to consider running out of the room or even asking to be excused, but she doesn't trust her voice to not give away her terror, which would escalate the situation.

Class ends and Edward runs out and Bella decides very, very quickly that Edward Cullen cannot know that she can read his mind and knows about him being a vampire. Surely he would follow through on killing her if he knew. She's got to play it cool like none of this ever happened. She can't tell anyone, because he (and his vampire family?) would kill them too.

Some of Edward's thoughts in Biology involved following her home and eating her there so there'd be less casualties. She has no way of knowing that he ran away to Alaska. It's not even a comfort that he doesn't return to school; she spends the whole time he's away waiting for him to appear out of thin air and kill her. She sharpens a stick from her backyard into a stake which she keeps in her backpack because she has no way of knowing it couldn't work, and she doesn't want to feel totally helpless, even if it's a silly gesture. No harm in trying.

In this time she does get some flashes of Alice's visions during lunch now that Alice has turned her "eye" on her. She has no clue what to make of them. Her with red eyes?? Her smiling with Alice?? Her with Edward?? These cannot be coming from her own imagination what the fuck is going on, she must be losing her mind from everything that's been happening

Edward comes back to school and Bella's picking up snippets from him from across the room. he seems much less murder-y. but she's not ready to trust that after everything she heard that first day. It doesn't help that Edward is coming in with every intention of gaslighting her ("Why didn’t she look up? Probably she was frightened. I must be sure to leave her with a different impression this time. Make her think she’d been imagining things before.")

The thing about Bella trying to hide her telepathy, which becomes very apparent in Biology on Edward's first day back, is she's never had to do that before. It's very difficult. It doesn't help that Edward's internal monologue is trained on how helpless she isa nd how it hurts to breathe near her because she smells so tasty

Talking to Edward is just difficult I’m general bc vampires are canonically capable of having multiple trains of thought at once and we know Bella is frequently ~dazzled~ by his beauty so Edward quickly becomes very concerned for this poor girl she’s hanging on by a THREAD

And of course Bella hears this worry so she’s in a positive feedback loop of anxiety. RIP

anyway Bella doesn’t do a perfect job of hiding her fear and her newfound ability. She slips up juuuust enough that Edward is Suspicious. But she makes it through

The tipping point for Bella going from "terrified" to "oh this is a complicated creature" is the incident with Tyler's van. For a horrible moment, Bella's absorbed in Alice's vision of her getting squished. Then she hears Not her! in her head in Edward's voice, clear as day. And she hears all Edward's anxiety over the potential for exposure but also how he just really, really doesn't want her to die (even if it's confusing him). She laughs a little too hard at his "no blood, no foul" joke at the hospital because she's in on it now and she's too stressed to think better of it.

I think her mind also, like. Snaps. at this point. She's done worrying. He's gonna kill her or he's not. He can't even seem to decide, and she can't do anything about it anyway, she's just going to keep on keeping on and if she dies, well, at least the end of her life will have been the most interesting bit? And yeah she's a little bit of a freak and she's fascinated by this guy. What is his deal. She’s along for the ride now

Bella doesn't grill Edward for the truth of how he got over to her so fast but she does slip up and thank him for risking so much to save her and he's like wait. Does she mean risking his life with the van or risking exposure of him and his family? There's no way she could know about that??

Of course that day is the day Alice lets it slip to Edward that he's going to fall in love with Bella. Bella isn't present for that but the next month, Edward refuses to talk to Bella but she hears a constant stream of I do NOT have a crush on her, I AM going to kill Mike Newton, I am NOT falling for her, even if it'd be so easy to fall for her, I wonder what she's thinking right now, I will NOT destroy her future, my throat HURTS and honestly it's still freaky as hell to be privy to a vampire's mind but her mind's kinda. Snapped. by now. and she can't help but be a tiny bit amused. At least he's not fighting "the monster within" anymore? Is this some weird strategy to keep from killing her? Sure, fine, whatever, thanks

Bella catches snippets of memories of the family meeting about killing her too. Btw. Much 2 think about

When Edward finally asks her if she wants a ride to Seattle, she hears how genuinely nervous he is, and she knows, fucking knows exactly how dangerous he is, so she honestly shocks herself when she says yes. He hasn’t killed her yet, and he’s genuinely fascinating, at this point she’s Into him but also studying him like a bug

At lunch that day Bella hears in Edward’s head that he’s ditching because they’re blood typing. She can’t think of a good excuse to also ditch. Edward is extremely confused that she leaves for Biology like she’s about to walk into a war zone

Port Angeles happens much the same as in canon with Bella feigning ignorance and acting like she hasn’t known about Edward being a vampire from day one. It seems silly to admit she figured out the vampire thing but not mention the telepathy, but every time she opens her mouth to admit to the telepathy, she remembers the snippets of the family meeting about killing her and she chokes on her tongue. It’s one thing for a vampire to choose to confirm a human’s suspicions about the existence of vampires. It’s another entirely for a human to have direct access to a vampire’s mind and the whole coven’s secrets, right?

So now Bella’s stuck herself in a horrible situation where Edward’s trying to be honest with her and she’s lying to his face. Angst angst angst

Bella doesn’t realize that night that she’s in love with Edward.

Edward has a really conflicting image of Bella because on the one hand nothing ever seems to surprise her. On the other, she seems nervous every time she opens her mouth. The idea that she can read his mind is just so far-fetched it just doesn’t occur to him— even he couldn’t read thoughts as a human

Bella hears the Bug Calculations in the meadow. I just wanted to point that out. It’s hilarious

Bella finally breaks. I’m thinking Midnight Sun page 349, right after this exchange:

…but when she says “you know, the rest of us feel that way all the time” it’s absolutely stricken with guilt and nerves. He never gets a choice in telling her what he’s thinking. It’s finally being thrown in her face. She can’t keep this up anymore. This can’t go on— not without him knowing

So of course replace “I was wishing I could know what you’re thinking” with a horrible minute of absolute silence from Bella. Her heart rate spikes and she finally braces herself says “no, ‘the rest of us’ includes your family. They can’t read minds, either.”

Even with his vampiric supercomputer brain™ it takes a good 5 seconds for him to register that she’s responding to something he didn’t say out loud. He chokes out her name in a strangled cry. This is the quietest his mind has ever been to her. She broke him. Good lord did she trigger something is he going to kill her— no, he wouldn’t, but what if—

Bella immediately starts crying. Sorry, babygirl. Yeah she terrified. She thinks Here it comes. She starts babbling. She blurts out the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth. “I’m not like you. Not really. I can only ‘hear’ you. And I don’t think my range is as far as yours, from what you’ve described. I’ve been afraid to tell you because I figured someone like you couldn’t let someone like me live with the knowledge I have now but because I was afraid to let you suspect I knew anything, I got to know you“ etc etc

Edward is still through all of it. Deathly (hah) still. Straight corpsin’. She’s now getting static from his brain— too many thoughts too fast for her human mind to pick anything comprehensible out.

Boy oh boy if Edward was struggling with the mortifying ordeal of being known before… he just found out the woman he’s in love with has been live-streaming his inner monologue every second they’ve been together. Noice 👌

He’s really, really angry. At Bella, for hiding this. At himself, for not seeing it sooner. At himself again, for every wicked thought he’s had in her presence (I know he’s prob not catholic but the catholic guilt is strong in this one). Every shared moment with her flashes before his eyes in reverse chronological order, leaving him off with the first day in Biology. Truly the most heinous thoughts he’s ever thunk, in his opinion, and she heard it all. “You’re here.” He says. “You know exactly how close I’ve come to killing you, over and over again… and you’re here.” It occurs to him that Bella could’ve been going along with his plans and pretending to be his friend for fear of her life, but she hears that train of thought and shuts it down: “Yes, I’m here. Because I want to be.” Edward winces because okay, yes, it does suck being on this side of the telepathy, confirmed.

Still, he tells her in short order, because he thinks it needs to be said: “You can leave right now. You can never talk to me again. I won’t come after you, and I’ll protect you from my family.” He silently prays that Alice loves Bella enough to not tell Rose or Jasper about this if she’s seen it, and then winces when he realizes Bella can probably hear that he’s not 100% certain he could protect her from his family.

She takes his hand. Gives him a really sad smile. “I’ll stay… if you’re sure you want me to.”

Edward starts choking/laughing/sobbing. Here’s this girl who’s seen him at pretty much his lowest, laughed her way through his feeble disguise, and somehow still accepts him.

Hearing this thought, something occurs to Bella: she loves him. Isn’t that what love is? Seeing someone’s worst, and taking their hand? Maybe she’s not in love with him yet, but… yeah, that’s some kind of love.

Now she’s looking at him like she loves him. Edward doesn’t dare believe that’s the expression she’s wearing, so her softened gaze and slight smile are driving him crazy: “Tell me what you’re thinking— I think I’m justified in asking, now” he’s still reeling so he’s gonna crack a joke, ok

“I meant it when I said you’re beautiful.” He can appreciate that more now— she knew how truly monstrous he was when she said that. He’s been dead wrong about her not understanding, or underestimating— she knows. It doesn’t really connect in his brain. So the word “Beautiful” sends him off on his canon tangent about being designed to kill (“aS iF yOu CoUlD oUtRuN mE”)— maybe an in-person demonstration will drill it into her that he’s too dangerous to want to be around

Instead of calling herself an idiot for still wanting to be around him, Bella argues that she’s aware of all that, but she’s also aware of the horrible pain he endures just to be around her, and all the control he’s shown so far.

Okay this is long enough already djdjxjxdjsjs TBC if there’s any demand for it

AU where Bella’s gift is not so much a shield as it is an Uno reverse card

Edward can read everyone’s mind but Bella’s as in canon, but now she can read Edward’s mind

Alice’s visions are blank where she’s concerned (like the werewolves in canon), but Bella can see visions of the future involving Alice, or has visions when she’s around Alice. Jasper’s gift is already kinda 2-way so he can still sense/manipulate her emotions, but she can do it back to him. She can hurt Jane, zap Kate, etc etc

Bella would have the weirdest fucking first day of school anyone has ever had, ever. There’s a voice in her head saying “yeah okay I guess she’s pretty but kind of plain and— wait why can’t I hear her” and then Biology is just. The worst hour of her life. but being Bella she’s just sitting there like

…while Edward plans the death of her and all her classmates right next to her

[ohburgee]

𝐘𝐨𝐮'𝐫𝐞 𝐬𝐚𝐟𝐞 𝐰𝐢𝐭𝐡 𝐦𝐞

yandere!general x civilian!reader

tw: yandere themes, obsession, stalking, violence, death, murder, mentioned police brutality an: before reading the story, the place takes in a dystopian future and has this aesthetic of dieselpunk, this plot is almost a part of my upcoming fanfic story but I changed my mind. Also, I'll be a bit late to post a new story because I'm back at my school :')

"You should take a rest" you heard your boss the owner of the library "No it's fine I don't have anything to do," you said smiling at him and he sighed and smiled back.

As you finish arranging the books on the shelf cleaning the dust around and serving some customers after the long work it is finally night and you bid goodbye to your boss as you get out of the library building.

And walked through the street and a vehicle passed by as you walked and a few people also walking, while walking you noticed something on your back and you quickly turned around and saw nothing.

You shrugged yourself and thought you were just paranoid about what happened yesterday.

A guy try to kidnap you and probably going to rape you thankfully the armored guards are there and notice the taller one their leader came and bends to your height.

"Are alright my lady?" He asks his deep husky voice ringing in your ears maybe due to his armored helmet it sounds robotic.

You slowly nodded your head and he didn't back away from you, "I need words" he said his helmet staring at your face.

"Yes I'm fine just-" Before you could speak he yelled at his people to take the guy who assaulted you and he turned around to look at you.

And he noticed your wound on your right arm and he grabbed your arm and inspected the wound, "It's fine it's just not worse" you said as you took off your arm from his hand.

He insists on taking you to the medic and you give in and accept it since you don't want to take trouble from this taller armored man in front of you. He can tear you apart if you say no.

He takes you to the medic, after checking and treating your wound you're finally got out and the armored man follows behind you.

A vehicle stopped in front of you "Take this lady to her home" he said as he walked in front of you "You don't need to" "No it's for your safety please" he said and you nodded and got in the and he looked at you with admiring.

Well, that happens and now you are very aware of your surroundings and not going to let that situation happen again.

After a few minutes of walking, you reach your apartment you pass by the small shop behind you and greet the old man who is sitting on the counter and give him a piece of snack well it's a gratitude for him after he saves you from the debts.

After that you walk upstairs to your apartment unlock the door close behind then lock it, you sigh and are very tired from your work.

You lay on the sofa and take some rest not bother going to your bed you're just very tired.

...

Seeing you like it's peaceful, he didn't know how he got his attention to you, you're just a librarian who works in the library at the center of the city.

After going to the library to investigate he sees you walking around the hall with the pile books wrapped around your arms as you try to balance with your body.

He admires your beautiful delicate self walking and after talking with the owner before he gets out of the library he takes one glance at you, as you are on top of the ladder arranging the books on the shelf. and got out.

But after an hour of guarding the city with his men, he saw you struggling with the man and he quickly ran towards you and grabbed the guy he noticed your wound that made his anger rage and he wanted to rip the man's face.

He shrugged the thoughts and focused on you he would do that later, after that he took you to the medic building, and after being treated he called someone to take you home, he didn't want you to be hurt and assaulted.

After a few days, he was mindless thinking that you might get hurt again so he decided to stalk you everywhere you go and even take his men to watch over you when he was busy on his import duty.

And now he followed you as you walked through the street and you caught your attention and turned around, and he immediately lowered his head.

You turn and continue walking and he looks at you peacefully as he notices a man following you, "You are really making me worried my dove" as he gets out of the vehicle and follows the guy.

He grabbed the guy's shoulder and slammed his body to the wall as he grabbed his head with his bare hand and squeezed his eyes, he doesn't care about people who do bad things also to you, he doesn't care about slaughtering people that's his job after all.

After that he followed you through your apartment and saw you are very kind and saw you giving something to the old man in the shop, you are very perfect and that is the reason he is obsessed with your kindness.

He takes the risk and walks upstairs and now in front of your apartment room gladly he is not on his armored and on his regular uniform.

He easily opened your apartment door and slowly opened it and he got in without sound and he slowly carefully walked inside his eyes wide and mouth gasping but quickly turned into a smirk seeing you peacefully sleeping on your sofa.

He tried to make a small sound that doesn't make you wake up and he thinks you are tired from your work or maybe a sleep heavier.

He slowly approaches you sleeping on the sofa as he kneels down to see your face clearly he watches you slowly breathe and slowly humping off your chest.

You look beautiful and adorable, he wanted to see you sleeping peacefully in his bed, when after his duty and gets home, he will get this beautiful face and always admire it.

God, you look so very beautiful he can't stop thinking about that.

Imagine if you were his lover he would carry you to bed and lay you down there, the sofa is too small for you and you should be sleeping in your bed, imagine lecturing you to be organized and careful with yourself as if he was your husband telling his wife.

But that those just imagination you are not his and you are in your own freedom.

He slowly touched your hair caressing it as if he was overly obsessed with your appearance, he wanted you and he wanted you now.

He had an idea, a plan he didn't want to get you by force didn't want you to be hated by you and get crept out so he had a brilliant idea.

...

You slowly open your eyes as you slowly get up and you realize you are on your sofa, you slept here even though you have your own bed you yawn and before you can walk through your kitchen you hear a loud knock on your door. Are those officers i know they knock loudly when they come to houses.

You walk towards your door and slowly open it to see two officers in front of you, you gulp and start to feel nervous, "Is there anything you want?" you ask wanting to know why they are here.

"We have a warrant of arrest for you, Ms," one of the officers said and you began to panic as you tried to remember, that you didn't do anything wrong you avoided any legal, and issued things.

"Warrant for what? I didn't do anything" You tried to excuse yourself or try to make yourself innocent.

"For the murder of the daughter of the high lord," they said as they mentioned the name, it's your friend before but you and her never get to talk after a conflict and your eyes widened "Why me, I didn't do anything to her, I'm her friend, not an enemy" you now encourage them to believe you, before you could add more words there's a footstep coming and you saw your boss looking worried to you.

He came closer to you and took both hands to his, "I'm sorry they suspect you for her murder, since there's a footage of you" he said and that made you shocked you didn't even do it.

You were her friend before but after knowing she was one of the daughters of high lords you cut off ties with her because of her role and not wanting to be involved in politics.

You didn't argue as you and your boss went to the station to confirm everything when they showed the footage to you, you saw someone who really looked like you as the person, the impostor stab your friend your eyes widened.

"As much as this footage can take as evidence," one of the soldiers said as you looked at them with merciful eyes, "Please that's not me, that's an imposter or just have the same appearance as me, please" you try to plead but they ignore and proceed to prepare your file.

This is why you don't want to get involved in something if those merciless officers catch you, you'll never come back to your normal life as their hands around you.

One of the officers came to you and led you to the cell as you looked at your boss trying to plead but he started to tears and kept saying he couldn't do anything, he was right there's nothing can do.

As the officer pushes you inside the cell and locks it you look at them with furious and worry, you kneel down on the ground and start to cry, you can't do anything if you try again to plead they won't listen to you, you pull your knees to your chest as you hugged them.

After a while of sleeping, you fell asleep due to your tiredness and pressure also with your small cries, you didn't get to eat breakfast as they took you.

Suddenly you heard footsteps coming closer you didn't bother to look at you didn't want to waste your time and cries of plead then a voice spoke.

"Trouble my dove" You slowly looked up and saw the armored guard leader as you saw the familiar face, you quickly got up and tried to plead at him.

"Please help me, I swear that was not me, I'm innocent and no crime is involved," you said as you started to cry hoping he could listen to you, "I know you didn't do it," he said as he looked at you.

"But your friend's death won't be easy" he added as he crossed his arms to his chest "The footage is not real someone trying to frame you," he said and your eyes widened yes that's true you are very innocent, you won't do that to your friend. As you heard someone framed you as a suspect.

"Please can you convince them that I'm innocent, please I'll do anything just let me have my freedom," you said trying to plead with him to convince the officers after he heard those words his serious face turned into a smirk, and walk closer to you.

"Anything?" he asked again and you nodded you know it's stupid but your life indicates here and your freedom.

"Be my consort" he replies and you look shocked at what he said, consort as mean like a wife or lover, "I know but it's the right thing to do, you are against high roles you know how powerful they are compared to your role" he said and he was right you were just low rank.

"Becoming my companion you'll have my name and half of my power as my wife," he said as he looked at you like the only pieces of hope, you look down you don't want to be married or as much as you don't want to be in this brutal politics but your life is in danger and you need your freedom.

"And I'll help you erase you in this case I just need your acceptance" he added as he waited for your answers, you sighed in defeat your life is more important you nodded and he smiled and told you he would tell the officers.

After a minute one officer came to you and unlocked the cell you got out and saw the leader you slowly approached him, "As my consort you'll be living with me and you have to abandon your low life" he said as he put his hands to your back as he leads you out the station.

When you both out and walked towards his vehicle he stopped and looked at you as he towered to you, "Also with my protection, if anyone tries to hurt you they will face consequences," he said and you slowly nodded your head and suddenly hugged you, you don't get any action about since you are very tired and not enough energy to think.

"You're safe with me", he said as he finally held you and his face smiled in victory, his plans turned successful. He let one of the guards imposter you and kill your friend, it was actually part of the authority to kill the daughter since the father was a threat to this world, and he added you to capture it successfully.

He can now always see you and touch you, and you will be forever with him even when the truth comes out he will take you back in force, when you have his name there's no turning back, you are his and forever will be.

[red-doll-face]

Heeyyy! Soooo I have a fun request idea that I totally came up with on my own with no help from anybody else, from my own mind and not some super creative person that answered my question about Arthur proposing to reader 🤣 it goes something like this:

-takes three months to work up the nerve and like another one to pick out one ring.

-chickens out at least two times bc the moment isn't right

-asks Hosea for advice 19 times (Hosea is tired)

-he's the trope where reader starts crying and he's like ohh goddd i fucked up of course you don't wanna marry my ass

-the way he would ride around for a week looking for the perfect spot to do it

-marks it on his map with a heart

-the essays he would write in his journal about this situation

-he's so cute i love him pls marry me Arthur Morgan

-awww once you say yes??

Hehehehe no pressure though!!!!! I just looooovvvveeeee this idea so much!

Yes !!! Yes of course I’ll write this!!! ❤️❤️💕💕🥰🥰😵‍💫😵‍💫😩😩As always it ended up running really long even though I didn’t even really flesh out a back story. 🥲 I’m glad you enjoyed my response ☺️☺️ I definitely had high honor Arthur Morgan in mind for this when I read it, I hope it’s ok and that you like it!!! I was so happy to see you in my inbox !!! @zae-heeyyy 💓💓💓💓💓 writing this was so cathartic and I loved the rdr1 setting so much so that I made this pre black water heist or whatever 😭🫶 from Arthur’s pov hope you like the characterization 🥹

Tags: established relationship, marriage proposals?? Arthur being a major weenie. Like huge weenie. He is soooo sooo sweet it’s almost like too much and I love love love sweet Arthur so very fluffy!!!! Pre black water !! Dutch being a jerk 😒 but cute dad Hosea moments ☺️

Arthur wants things to be perfect for you.

(High honor) Arthur Morgan x fem. Reader

Arthur knows he’s made up his mind when he’s in the tailor’s shop in Blackwater, looking like a lowdown cattle rustler among all of the fancy fabrics on the wall. He and his spurs, his boots scuffed to hell and a leather satchel slung over his chest. He’s out of place and he knows it. But he’s here to buy a new shirt.

Yesterday, he had nearly driven himself insane looking for a shirt of his that wasn’t ruined, ripped and mended, dirty, stained irreparably. None of them were good enough for what he wanted, something nice to get down on one knee and ask his girl to marry him. And so he kissed you goodbye and rode into town in search of something better. He makes an effort at pretending to be interested in any of the fancy stuff, silk and linen suits that he sure will never be fitted for him. He clears his throat as the attendant drags his eyes away from the sunday paper.

A tight lipped smile consumes the man's face. Arthur already can sense the assumptions he’s getting but he pays little mind to it. He’s getting this shirt and that's that.

“How can I help you, sir?” Obnoxious and nasally, the thin and short man's voice already gives away his air of superiority. Arthur's eyes narrow but he isn’t too irritated yet.

“Here to get a shirt.” His words are simple. The attendant raises a brow.

“Just a shirt, not… pants or shoes?” the attendant lowers the paper to scan over the rest of Arthur’s clothes. Arthur can hardly ignore the burn of insecurity.

He gives a look that conveys how quickly he is losing his patience. “Excuse me?” He can only tell his posture changed when he observes the man's attitude change, clinging to the counter between them like it would make any difference.

“No, well sir, perhaps I’ve overstepped, I apologize. What kind of-of shirts were you thinking?”

“Listen, I ain’t here to cause no trouble, just show me what you’ve got,” The attendant hurries to show him some options, tries to sell him a vest but that isn’t happening with his budget.

In the end, he picks a blue french dress shirt. Costs a real pretty penny but he wants it to be special. Because you’re special. He stuffs it away in a saddlebag after thanking the attendant, who no doubt heaves a sigh of relief after he leaves.

-

He’s been collecting rings. In a special bag is a collection. A few plain gold bands, some with stones set in them. They’re pretty blue and red gems, some have filigree detailing. But he still can’t find the right one.

Worse then, is that they’re rings of all different sizes which he gets from his more sordid activities. Debt collecting or train robberies. It’s all stolen goods. It feels wrong to give you something like that but when he told Dutch his intentions, he clapped him on the back and told him to look in the collection box for more rings. He nodded then but it was half hearted. Somehow that was more souring. Did he really want to give you something he took from someone else? That someone else bought for their loved one with the express purpose of giving them something to symbolize how they loved each other? His own thoughts swirl circles in his head, why he had these scruples about it, he didn’t know.

It’s riding with Hosea that he asks for advice. They’ve been working on a job in Tumbleweed, trying to con some poor fool into giving money he shouldn’t by pretending to sell land deeds. They ride all the way from the yellow grasses of Hennigan’s Stead and it’s been mostly quiet over the stretch of passing though Armadillo. Arthur decides to speak up after they pass through town. The sun is beginning to dip a bit lower in the sky but they’ll be in Tumbleweed before then.

“I been-”

“This about you n’ the girl?” Hosea already has a knowing smile and Arthur rubs the back of his neck. “I think you should do it! You two would make quite the couple, she’s a sweetheart, that girl,”

“Yeah, she-she’s… I’ve been lookin’ at rings to give ‘er,” He grips the reins before going lax, riding easily along the path. Hosea murmurs, letting Arthur continue. He guides Boadicea down the dusty road. “I don’t think I wanna give her something I got robbin’, don’t seem right,”

“Then get her something new, I don’t think she’ll mind at all. But you do what you think you should. You could probably fence all the other rings you thought about and get her something quite nice with the cash,”

“Yeah, I could do that,” why hadn't he thought of that?

“That’s a wonderful thing, getting married. Don’t be afraid to, y’know, go through with it. If you’re thinkin’ about it. Maybe, once Dutch and I find the perfect spot for the gang to settle down, we’ll build you two your own little thing on the land,”

“You that confident she’ll say yes?” Arthur has an awkward and disbelieving laugh but Hosea keeps his earnest smile.

“Why wouldn’t she? Arthur, somehow, she has gone for a man like you, you should be over the moon, you should be whistling tunes everywhere you go,”

“Like me? What's that supposed to mean?” He knows what he means. A man like him had very little to offer you, a young woman who could easily charm some other well established man into giving you a home. Leagues away from his cot and the weathered canvas he put up to give you some small amount of privacy.

“You remember what happened with that Mary woman. This time, things oughta turn out better. This one’s got no old man to chase you around with a shotgun,” Hosea figures himself very funny and laughs, ending it with a shallow cough. Arthur furrows his brows.

Of course he reminded him of his disaster with Mary. He could never escape that woman, even when he severed ties with her. But how he had wanted to, especially with you. Yes, it was true, he had loved Mary. But now he loves you. He needs you. His idea of the rest of his life always includes you, laying in bed with him, gently stroking his chest, leaving him love notes in his satchel, telling him what happened in the camp while he was gone. He always listens, always wakes up smiling with you tucked under his arm.

“I remember just fine,” he grunts,

“Good, because you’ll forget about her soon enough. Month from now, I suppose. Where are you going to tell her?”

“Where? I didn’t think we was gonna go nowhere, just tell her when I was ready to…” he hadn’t even imagined a place when he first set out to do this.

“So you wanna propose; with Uncle standing behind her, drunk off his ass in just his soiled union suit?”

“I-”

“Take her somewhere special, somewhere to make her feel special! Women like to feel special, Arthur, you know that,”

“I do?” He says, with a sarcastic edge to his voice, though he tries on his attempt at sounding uninvested.

“You should. I didn’t do that enough. I should have before, well…” Arthur nods, bowing his head a little as if in remembrance. He hopes to always have you by his side. Otherwise he would be much like Hosea: carrying a torch for a woman who passed through his life too quickly.

-

He starts his journey looking for something special. Special like you are. Keeps his eye out, marking potential things in his map, and makes a list in his journal. Aurora Basin maybe, a pretty lake deep in the forest but getting attacked by bears doesn’t sound romantic in any way. There are some sweeping vistas overlooking the San Luis River in Rio Bravo. He isn’t quite sure about anything though, thinking it over deeply. He just wants things to be perfect.

He’s still thinking about it when he comes back to camp, close to Lake Don Julio, sighing. Thinking much too hard obviously, he doesn’t notice that you’re sitting on his bed, biting your nail nervously until you see him first. You look worried, happy to see him but worried. You stand, hugging your arms around yourself and then placing them on your hips to make you seem more upset but you just drop them when he’s close enough.

“Hey, darlin’,” He utters, opening his arms to give you a hug but you just look up at him. He drops them, mentally kicking himself before taking his hat off and sitting down on his bed.

“Arthur, you’ve been gone three days,”

“I know,” you’re disappointed in his answer. You take a breath and a pause, looking off to the right. He stares down at his scuffed and weather worn boots. He hates to disappoint you, hates when you’re upset. It takes a lot to get you there, too. You’re a forgiving soul when he knows he doesn’t deserve forgiveness. He looks away, like a dog who knew he shouldn’t have chewed those leather boots up to bits.

“You know. I asked everyone where you were and they didn’t know,”

“Honey, I ain’t gonna leave you, I’m not-”

“You leave other men out of this, Arthur,” you already predicted he’d bring another man’s failings to make up for his own. Maybe bringing up John’s shortcomings while you’re upset is a little below the belt but it worked better in his head. He puffs some air out in a laugh. God, he just can’t seem to find the right words to say.

“Is something funny? Is how much-how much I worry funny to you?” You look like you’re gonna cry, squeezing your arms tight around yourself. Your eyes flick around, thinking of all the people watching, never any goddamn privacy in this place. You start to back up, looking for a place to hide your tears.

“No, no, I- I’m sorry, don’t go walkin’ away,” You let him pull you back. Let him tug you into his lap. You sniff and tuck into his neck. “I’m sorry,” he says at least 5 more times. His hands pet down your hair, holding you. He hadn’t wanted to come back to such a harrowing fear in the pit of his stomach, the thought of you walking off without him. He thinks himself lucky that you haven’t had enough of him and decided to leave already.

Arthur pulls you in real tight, doesn’t let up til’ you start to calm down a little. “Shouldn’t cry for me, sweet girl, bastard like me ain’t worth them tears,” he wipes a few away. Seeing you like this could make him cry if he thought about it too much, how he had let you down. His nerves almost make him tremble, the slightest shake in his fingers when he brushes them under your eyes, shiny with tears. If anyone else made you cry, he’d knock their teeth out. But what is he supposed to do when it’s him? Sickness roils around his abdomen.

“Where were you, anyway?” You shake your head at his words. “Mac and Davey said…” he perks up at that. Those boys are a terror. His face screws up in an anticipated anger. He’d be angrier with them, they’re the ones who need to see it, not you.

“What’d they say?”

“No, they were just messing with me. I don’t think it’s true,” You look away. But he knows exactly how nasty those boys can be. He gives you a look and you give him a defeated one in return. An embarrassment leaks into your words. You can’t meet his eyes, twiddling your fingers.

“They said you were at the saloon in town. They said things that aren’t true and I know it but it isn’t nice to leave me here with nothing to say about it,”

“I know, darlin’, next time, you’ll be the first to know where I’m goin’,” You nod and wrap an arm around his shoulder while he pats your back, grabs your thigh so he can pull you to sit across his lap fully.

“Are you gonna answer my question or should I take their word?” you tease and he reassures you about those boys. They’ll be hearing from him soon enough.

“I’m gonna have a word with them, don’t worry about it,” he scratches his beard. How is he supposed to say that he went riding around looking for a place to take you so he can ask you to take his sorry hand in marriage? He had already disappointed you and saying it’s a secret is a laughable idea.

“Well, I was out, uhh- huntin’?” You frown and lean away.

“Arthur, you’re an awful hunter and an awful liar,” you look really hurt. You almost stand but he pulls you back. He needs something to tell you and fast.

“I was out lookin’ for somethin’ real special to give you. It’s supposed to be a surprise…but well, I can’t keep no secrets from you, sweetheart,” You fuss a little, a wariness in your posture. You study his expression. It isn’t a complete lie, makes it a bit easier to pull off. He really does have a surprise for you. He tries to keep his face neutral, but his lips twitch up when yours do to, a small smile shining through the clouds of your emotional turmoil.

“What surprise?”

“I didn’t find it, guess a surprise, it’s gonna have to stay,” You pout and wiggle, a soft chuckle rumbling in his chest.

“Ok, but once you find it, you better take me to see it right away,” You kiss him, soft and sweet, holding his prickly jaw in one hand. He can feel how your pout gives way to a smile. The feeling of your soft lips on his is one of those things he’ll never get sick of, never get over.

“I will, promise,”

-

He’s found the perfect ring, really, by chance. It’s a little thing but it’s the right color, goes well with you. The rock on it isn’t very big but he saw it in a window while in town. Some big fancy jewelry store, showing off all the finer things that he never paid any mind to. Unless it was to steal it of course. But he had bought it. With money that may have been also robbed but it was from hitting a Del Lobo stash. A good deed, probably in a backwards sense.

The girls had ‘oohed’ at it, Mary-Beth had an excited tiny clap and Tilly rejoiced. Jenny nodded with a small smile.

“We’re happy for you Arthur! Oh my god, Arthur Morgan, gettin’ married…” Tilly giggles, putting her hands to her cheeks and clasping her hands in front of the skirt of her yellow dress.

Karen laughed. “Never thought I’d see the day,”

“Don’t listen to her, I mean we was hoping when we saw you two huddled up all the time,” Mary-Beth takes the ring from him, holding it closer, so that Jenny and Tilly can get a closer look.

“Hey, be careful with that,” he murmured, trying not to sound too desperate. He scratches his neck instead of snatching it back like his instinct wants him to. Evening is coming soon, purple dusk and soft coyote yipping and howling far in the distance marks the sun's descent. Meaning you’re probably finishing up whatever it is you’re doing. He hopes you don’t come around the corner at an inopportune time. Arthur turns his head this way and that.

“Where’d you get it? Looks new, ain’t scuffed to high heaven like everything else around here,” Jenny points out and the girls nod.

“Bought it in town,” playing it off doesn’t work so well.

They ‘ooh’ some more. “Fancy. Only the best for Arthur’s sweetheart,” Karen coos teasingly.

“Gimme that,” grumbling, he takes the ring back, bowing his head so they can’t see the embarrassment plain on his face. He meanders off after asking how things have been. Of course, they only give him updates about you, Karen jokes that that’s all he wants to hear about anyway. He scoffs and wishes them a good evening.

But the perfect spot is yet to be discovered. Evades him like just about nothing else. He almost gives up on the idea. He’s been taking you out, trying to get you in the almost perfect moments. Taking you out on the town in Blackwater was a good time, he bought you dinner and took you on a stroll down the cobbled streets, watching your face light up when you saw something pretty in a window, clutching his hand and pulling him in more. He almost proposed on the veranda at the Blackwater saloon. Only for a fight to break out at the poker table to interrupt.

Then he took you out to see the poppy fields in Great Plains. But he had let his anxiousness and his nerves overtake him. He had tucked the ring away. You had looked so beautiful standing among the flowers, it was perfect but he just…couldn’t. Instead, he wrote in his journal about his own cowardice. Wrote about if he should lock you to him for the rest of your life. If he’d end up leaving you a widow. Or if you were to be taken from him like Annabelle and Bessie. Leaving behind lonely men who longed for a woman gone from this world. Then he scribbled pictures of you, trying to draw the motion in your hair and in your dress and the beaming most enchanting smile he had ever seen.

Boadicea munched on the long wheat grass, waving in the wind while he kept a watchful eye on you, picking flowers in your pretty dress fluttering against the bright blue of the sky. You have a bunch of candy orange poppy flowers held together by your palms, a bright smile on your face. You walk to where he sits, leaning against the tree, next to a small broken down stone fence. Your smile falters when you see his pensive expression. You come close enough to touch. You dangle one flower above him before you tuck it into the frayed ropes banded around the crown of his hat. He lowers his head while you fuss. Smiling like a fool. You smile again too, sitting beside him. You both listen to the sound of the quiet plains, breeze in the branches above him. The shade is cool, light filters beautifully over your features, speckled like the back of a doe.

“Something has been going on with you, Arthur,” you state as pure fact, knowing him all too well. You had only really known each other a year and have only been together as a couple for six months but you knew him better than anyone else. You had let him be himself, let him just…be. He didn't need to say anything for you to understand him.

“I’ve just been… thinkin’ bout some things,”

“Really? I thought you said you weren’t very good at that,” you smile a little, nudging his shoulder. Hoping to lift his spirits with his similar brand of humor but when he hardly huffs a laugh, you frown. “Is it about you and me?”

“Yeah, in a way,” he says, unable to hide anything from you. Why should he bother? Saying no would make you more suspicious. Arthur closes his eyes and can feel the panic rising in you. He could have been better about saying it but he’s quick to deflect it away from his secret. “You happy with me?” low and grumbled, the severity makes his tone go way down.

“I don’t understand. Do I not seem happy? Arthur, I’ve never…I’ve never been happier than I am with you. You’re the kind of man any girl would be lucky to have,” You smile, leaning to face him. Softening up, your eyes track over his face.

He wanted to ask you right then and there. Tell you just how much you complete him. How lucky he was to have you, how there never was a happier time in his life. He doesn’t believe in that sentiment you have, he had failed the women in his life. But he had wanted to make a vow, to never leave you alone. It’s his own nerves that wrap tight around his hands, don’t let him reach in his satchel for the little treasure that will be your wedding ring.

“No, I just know I been gone, I don’t wanna ignore you. I just been busy,”

“You have things to do,” You sigh heavily. “I wish the other men would be as helpful as you. Sometimes, I watch Sean, Uncle, and Bill lay around all day while you’re out working. It doesn’t seem fair,” Your brows pinch in a small dissatisfaction with the idea. He smirks.

“I don’t know how much I trust Sean to get things done right. We’d probably eat nothin’ but leaded rabbit meat and whiskey if we left it up to that boy,” You giggle and nod. Happy to see him back in his joking mood.

“Arthur… You know I love you, don’t you?” God, those words make him shiver. Make his heart rattle in his chest. Could swear his insides turn about 3 times. So sweet, you look at him, hands on his thighs, leaning into his side. He opens his arm for you to tuck into, grabbing your waist to pull you close.

“Yeah, I do. Love you more,” he can feel heat flush up his neck and cheeks but he doesn’t care if he looks like a lovesick idiot. Your joy is worth it. The wind blows your hair over your shoulder, you let him sweep it back some more. Your pretty laugh when he bows over to lay you down on the grass makes him chuckle.

-

He’s finally found it. Montana Ford. A shallow spot in the river he discovered, looking for a short cut trying to cross from New Austin into West Elizabeth. He hated riding through the Del Lobo populated Thieves Landing, especially after they were catching on that it was Dutch and his boys robbed their stash two weeks ago. He sighed and then he veered off the road, looking for somewhere to cross. And the shaded river was perfect.

He stays there a moment, looking at the pretty grass growing alongside the water, the light glittering over the surface. The sound of the river rushing by fills his head pleasantly. You’d love it, you’d toss your boots aside and wade into the river, lifting your skirts high enough to hopefully not get wet. But you’d be wet anyway. He’d do it too, you made him feel like he was twenty despite his thirty some years on this earth.

He decides to sit and sketch it and write about you. Just how excited he was at how everything was coming together. He feels like a kid, sappy but too devoted to care very much at the small heart he puts on his map. He’s almost embarrassed of himself. Even with no one to see. He folds his map up and stuffs his journal away, whistling his horse over. With a soft word or two, he mounts up and continues on to his destination.

-

It's been three days since he found the spot he would take you to and he’s had a ring in his satchel that glares up at him every time he opens it to pull out a cigarette. Of course, just as everything comes together, Dutch insists he go scouting for some new venture, looking to follow a treasure hunter so they could rob him. It ends up being a whole lot of nothing from a bad tip but Dutch has a ‘nothing ventured, nothing gained’ speech to try and lick his own wounds at Arthur’s expense. Arthur rolls his eyes. Feels his hands knot into fists.

“Maybe next time, it’ll be you runnin’ all over New Austin on some wild goose chase! And I’ll give you this bullshit. Wouldn’t that be just fine, wasting your goddamn time-”

“Arthur, calm down! I don’t have time for your complaining. Where is that girl of yours? Why don’t you blow some of that steam off with her? It’s obvious to me-”

“Dutch…stop pushing the boy,” Hosea remarks from where he’s reading a book nearby. Arthur postures to continue arguing and Dutch shoots a glare before waving him off. He looks to Hosea and backs away, huffing. But before he can go for a smoke to hopefully calm himself down so he could be with you, Hosea calls him over.

“So… have you popped the question?”

“No, I ain’t got time most days,” He sighs in defeat, dropping his weight on the seat next to him, resting on his knees, leaned over. He takes his hat off to adjust his hair before putting it back on. He hadn’t seen you in another two days on account of this stupid ploy to rob a treasure hunter who didn’t know left from right and east from west. What an idiot. But not nearly as foolish as he.

“Tomorrow, I’ll tell Dutch to leave you out of these plots of his. I’ll even tell Miss Grimshaw that she’ll be gone. Take her and ride away for a couple of days. I hope to see a ring on her finger when you get back. In fact, I’ll be expecting it!” Hosea has a smile on his face, the excitement is genuine. Arthur nods.

“And what if she says no?”

“Well you keep at it. Perhaps a little persistence is all you need but why do you insist on imagining the worst?” It’s as if after asking, he considers why Arthur might not want to change things irreparably, might have already put his heart on the line and had it thrown away before.

“Arthur, the sting of rejection must be pretty…pretty lamentable. But you wouldn’t be trying this hard if you really thought you didn’t have a good chance,” Hosea sets his book down. “Go get some rest… leave first thing in the morning,” Hosea pats Arthur lightly on his shoulder. Arthur looks up as Hosea wanders in the direction of his tent.

His heart does yearn to see you at his side, wearing his ring on your finger. To hear you referred to as Mrs. Morgan. But all he can see is an incredulous look on your face. ‘Marry? Me? Arthur, you must be joking,’ you laugh and laugh. You’d never be so cruel but whatever part of him hates his own guts imagines the scenarios with great fervor. The anger from the rest of his day and the anger at himself grit against each other. He growls low before marching off to his tent.

You’re already inside, looking very lovely, one of his mended shirts serving as something of a robe to wear over your underthings. You look up and smile. He could forget the whole world just by looking at you. You hum, scooting over in bed.

“Arthur…” the way you call his name, you hardly need to give him any pet names, just Arthur will do.

“Come out with me tomorrow. First thing in the morning,” He states. More like a command, the residual anger drips off his words. You look at him strangely.

“Alright but I’d like to know what all of this is about first,” You set whatever you were working on, perhaps brushing your hair as you set a horsehair brush aside. You give him a concerned look.

“Found that surprise,” he grumbles, sitting down and tugging his boots off. “Hope you’ll like it but…” he stops to tug his gun belt off, his suspenders too. Arthur rests his hat gently on the side table. “Can’t be too sure til I show it to ya,” You smile softly.

“I think if you think I like it, I’ll love it,” God, he hopes so. Anticipation bounces around in his head and in his lungs. He’s practically short of breath. How he’s going to sleep, he has no idea.

“Yeah?” you hum in agreement. Looking sleepy, he’s endeared by how your eyes blink slowly, how you wiggle onto his chest the second he lays down. Your hands rub down his chest and belly. You’re asleep in a matter of minutes. He almost wishes he had you for company still but he’d never wake you for something so selfish. Instead, he pets down your hair and listens to your breathing, the natural hush that covers the camp once it’s too late for much of anything but small chatter.

-

Like clockwork, he wakes early. He can’t remember falling asleep but you're softly murmuring, you won’t wake unless he expressly wakes you. He gives himself time to put on that shirt he bought and rub his hand over his face at how nervous and silly he feels buttoning it up. He pulls a jacket over it to hopefully hide how ridiculous he looks. The morning is a pale blue when he steps out, thinking to bring you coffee to wake you.

You dress, half asleep, when he comes back to you, humming into the cup he brought you. You wear something nice but not overstated. You put kisses on him to wish him a good morning after you’ve decided you’re cleaned up enough.

He helps you up on his horse, Boadicea already very used to you. The ride isn’t too bad and you certainly make it better, he’s quiet with nerves, responding as much as he can without getting lost in his thoughts. The sun has climbed up and blazed down on you for a while by the time you get there. But your face when you see his surprise is too precious, eager to slip off the back of his horse.

“Arthur, it’s so beautiful!” The summer sun is high in the sky, perfect for your plans as you tug your boots off. He ambles after you, hitching his horse to a tree. You’re already sighing and knee deep in the center of the river. Your stockings lay haphazardly tossed over your boots. You’re some fabled creature, come from somewhere else. He could see it. No woman shined like you did, at least not how he saw things.

Just like he imagined, he rolls his pants up and tosses his boots aside, the spurs jingle when they hit the ground. The light catches the river’s surface, shades of yellow and green, the earth's gentle brown. You’re excited to see him join you, taking his hand that he holds out to you, pressed to his belly and chest, just where you belong.

“You like it, sweetheart?” He mumbles, really fishing for compliments. He knows you do but he’d love to hear you say it.

“I love it, Arthur, how could you say I wouldn’t? Sometimes, you’re a silly man,” you laugh, sway with him in the river. Birds sing, the water is cool, it’s perfect. He pulls you up to a shallower part of the ford, the sun forms a halo around you, reminds him you’re pure heaven and he couldn’t let you go.

“I have something else for you,” his voice is shaky instead of the easy confidence he likes to portray himself as. You look up excitedly but the dazzling smile slips off your face, you're shocked as he pulls a ring from his satchel and kneels down in the river.

“I-uhhh…I-“ he had really planned all of this and didn’t think of a single word to say. He can't bear to look up, he’s sure he’ll lose his nerve. “I haven’t loved…anyone like I love you,” the ring looks tiny and pathetic in his fingers. They’re also calloused to hell but he continues anyway. “There ain’t anyone else for me in this world but you. I just wish I was a better man, you deserve more than I can give but… if you would have me,” he looks up and your hands cover your mouth and tears leak over your fingers.

He really had ruined everything, hadn’t he? How was he supposed to go on living with you? What would he tell Hosea? His face falls and his heart cracks but he’d be glad to take you back home and disappear for a few days.

“I’m sorry, sweetheart, don’t know what I thought,”

“Arthur, just please…” you hold out your left hand. You wipe your tears, trying to compose yourself and when he sees your smile, your hand over your right cheek, he lets himself ease. “Nothing would make me happier than to be- to be your wife, Arthur, you are…you’re the best man I know,” you wiggle your fingers excitedly and he slips the ring over your ring finger. He stays stunned, kneeled in the water, his pants soaking it all up but he couldn’t care less.

The ring looks so perfect on you. He holds your hand, kissing it like a knight of old, looking at him down on his knee, still crying but that brightness in your eyes is all he needs. Your giggle makes him smile at you too. And you drop to embrace him, tucking into his chest, arms around his neck. You murmur his name, rub his back. Tangle your fingers in his hair. He settles with you, surrounded by your unmistakable presence, basking in it. Holds you tighter, trying to not squeeze the air out of you. He breathes you in, holding you through your overwhelmed clinging, wiping your tears on his shoulder.

You pull back a little, enough to kiss him, his relief is groaned into your mouth. He loses track of himself and slips, sitting in a river with you in his arms, giggling more into his kiss.

You sit with him on the banks, trying to dry out after he tipped over. So much for his fancy shirt. He thinks the both of you will look half drowned by the time he brings you back to camp but he isn’t sure he wants to go back. Just you and him for a few days sounds rather enticing. You keep looking at your ring, leaned into his shoulder. A pleased little smile blooms over your face. How can he not smile at how beautiful you look, hair wet at the ends, warm light casting its glow over you.

You look up at him, with a look that says you’re gonna cry again but you just give him a teary smile.

“I’m a lucky bastard, get to call you mine,” You wrap one tiny hand over his neck when you kiss him slow and deep, letting him consume the very air in your lungs, grip over your body to feel it. You moan just softly enough to pull on his need for you. But you part ways for you to continue.

“Did you really think I’d say no?” you give him a sad frown. As if upset that he would think such a thing of you. You brush your fingers against his skin. He looks away.

“You wouldn’t have been the first,” you sigh.

“Who could say no to Arthur Morgan?” You ask no one in particular but he huffs a small laugh.

“Many people,” a joking tone tinges his words. But then he dips towards the sentimental. “Don’t even remember, really, all I think about is you, darlin’…” You laugh before coming closer, unable and unwilling to part from him. He knows he’s a hundred and one percent sap but he lets himself melt in your presence.

“Well, it certainly wasn’t me,” you wiggle your left hand in his face. He chuckles a little at your cute little fingers. “I’m glad…it means I get you all to myself,” The joy is boundless in his chest, he could light the night like a lightning bug with the flame in his heart.

“Arthur, I… I… sometimes I don’t have the words to tell you how much I love you,” you lean onto him. He shakes his head with what he’s sure looks like a stupid grin on his face. He wasn’t sure this would be in the cards for him but here he is, with you.

“Every part of me loves you, honey,” is all he has to say, paling in comparison to the pure power of your own words over him. They tumble clumsily from his mouth but you pull him down for kisses anyway. Your teasing ‘do you?’ has him nodding between your giggles and wet kisses.

-

Thank you so much for leaving me this request, I loved writing it!! It was so much fun and I really had fun including some parts of rdr1 map that were really special to me and brought me back to when I was a kid playing that game 🥹🥹🥹🥲🥲🥲❤️❤️❤️ any feedback is appreciated and thanks for reading 🥰🫶

[creatingblackcharacters]

Hi!! I hope you're having a great day, and if you don't mind, I have a question regarding a Black character and what hairstyle I should draw them with!

I listen to this podcast about 4 people in an apocalypse situation, one of them is Black. Previously I drew them with a short afro because I was rushing a doodle and didn't put much thought into it, but now I'm rethinking my choices.

They live in a car with essentially no access to showers, and I can only imagine the hair care products they'd need costing an arm and a leg, literally-

They have access to scissors, maaaybe a comb/brush? but they probably don't have any soap, and I'm also assuming they don't want a hairstyle that takes too long to take care of- I doubt they'd want their friends to braid their hair in the car or out in the cold.

Their hair texture isn't described in the podcast, but I've been imagining them with coily hair, I don't know how much texture changes which hairstyles they could have, but I imagine it plays into things at least a little.

I'm not very knowledgable on Black hairstyles, so I'm not really sure what kind of hairstyle is best when you don't always have the option to wash it and when you don't have access to hair care products and when you don't have all that much time on your hands.

Would they most likely just keep their hair as short as possible to avoid problems? Could they keep their hair a little longer by keeping it in locs? Is there some secret 3rd option that I don't know about?

No pressure to answer, I'm sorry if any part of this comes across as bigoted or rude, and thank you for reading ^^

Have a great day/evening/night/other time of day and thank you for all you do :)

I think the design you have is fine 👍🏾 occasionally cut it to keep it short. Locs would be fine if they had locs prior to the apocalypse, because then you wouldn't have to mess with it outside of occasionally pulling them apart at the root to keep them separate or letting them grow freeform. But even then, if they NEVER find a shower EVER to clean and maintain them, yeah the afro would be the way I go.

[chilling-seavey]

okay but what if confessional george and reader are caught, and because of the pressure of the congregation and the whole village are pushed together (Bridgerton who?), let's be honest, they'd have the craziest married sex life of the whole town. outside a perfect couple, and then absolute devils in the sheets xD

Honestly, I was so avid that pastor's son George and reader would not be endgame but you guys with these asks are lowkey changing the entire narrative in my mind and...I'm not mad about it.

So, for this kick off of our proper start to developing this universe (now that there's an official masterlist and everything!!), I will ramble about how I see their future future. As always, you are all more than welcome to pitch in with your own thoughts and opinions!!

As we know from our two Confessional universe fics that have been posted, George is Toxic with a capital T; he's manipulative and overall a slimy little fucker, ngl. I love love love first anon's note here about being 'forced' together if/when they are found out...that's so realistic to this universe and this was honestly the message that really changed my mind on their story.

I see this situation like a kind of 'arranged marriage' trope where they lowkey hate each other? Of course they don't hate each other, they just hate the situation (read: George hates the situation) and that causes a lot of tension between him and reader. Honestly, depending on where they are in their [weird] 'relationship' when they're found out, depending on how far his character has progressed, I could even see George going as far as sleeping with someone else while he's in this forced engagement with reader. Don't come for me, guys!! He's not a good guy, remember?

Of course, it wouldn't end with them completely parting ways (whether it was due to their own forgiveness with each other and/or the pressure from the community that they have a duty to go through with this wedding) and they would get married in the church and have a modest little reception in the back garden. Reader would be so infatuated because she had a crush on him for the longest time, he took her virginity, and now they're married; that's just the perfect fairytale ��� She might be sliiightly naive...

And, yeah, first anon here is so right. As they grew into this new phase of their relationship, reader definitely grew into her self-confidence and they both take on that role of the sweetest couple in town to outsiders but kinky fuckers behind closed doors. Debating if they'd live in his parents' house for the first year or so (because, hello, affording your own place in this economy? George doesn't even have a paying job) to then be able to explore all the tensions and chaos from that...or if they'd have their own house in town.

But anyway, George might be a dick in this universe, but he still loves God so there is no hesitation when his father is thinking of stepping back from his role in the church and asks him to take his place. He had learned a lot from his father and growing up in the church but he'd also go to camps to practice and preach and learn and those times away would definitely strain his marriage a little. Yeah, they'd be in a good place by then but he wouldn't be miraculously changed either. Would be interesting to play up that and the situations that could arise etc.

Not to mention, leading into second anon's note here, once they're older and [George is finally] more mature and maybe they have a kid or two (or more??) (because God literally says 'be fruitful and multiply' and George will be damned if he doesn't listen to God), the church ends up being passed into their capable hands. And they'd still be that 'perfect angels on the surface but lil devils behind closed doors' couple well into this era. But perhaps these later, later moments give George's character the opportunity to do a full 180 from where he started. Perhaps he's witness to one of the altar boys being a little manipulative creep to one of the girls and he sees his old self in that young man (and now with a whole new perspective now that he has daughter/s) and has the chance to put a stop to it.

[bloomzone]

2025 : #15 questions inbox ! part 1

✒️.hi sparkles ! Today’s blog is all about answering y'all questions I’ve been reading through everything in my inbox maybe u will found an answer of a question u had in ur mind here ? Let's start !

Q1 : when I'm in a bad mode or maybe just bored idk how to make it clear but my mood is always the one who controls my actions ? How to stop this ?

Answer : the rule is Never ever EVER let your mood dictate what you do , u have to take action first because movement changes your mood. For example u want to be fit u need to exercise and workout several times in the week then u will feel amazing u will feel incredible cuz u take that one step or if u want to get good grades u need to study daily then u will feel productive and happy cuz u know the action of "studying" will improve ur grades and ur knowledge etc and it will lead u to your goals So Act like the person you want to become And when u start taking those actions and you start moving in the direction of your dreams and the things that you want and deserve in life your mood will follow trust me

Q2 :help how to stop overthinking about what people around me think about me

Answer : Stop worrying about what other people think and let them think what they want. You cannot control what another person thinks about you U CAN'T( this is a point that a lot of ppl need to understand )so how about you focus on what you think about yourself and let them have a negative thought at the end of the day ppl will judge . u can't control it and trying to do it will just making u insecure so focus on what you can control and , what you think about yourself , what you do every day that makes you proud of yourself and when u're proud of yourself you don't care what anybody thinks because you know who you are So let others think what they want and focus on ur power which is your actions and how u live your life . Say this every morning "I choose to focus on what I can control. I release the fear of others' judgments and give them the freedom to think, say, and feel whatever they wish. My life is my responsibility, and I will act in ways that make me proud of myself. I trust in my journey and take the necessary steps to achieve my goals. I am confident in who I am, and I let go of the need for external validation. Today, I will honor my growth and stay true to myself, knowing that my worth comes from within."

Q3: I feel so exhausted from life

Answer : Feeling exhausted and overwhelmed is a natural response dw abt it ! It’s okay to acknowledge that it shows you're human with feeling ur time and energy are your most valuable assets so if you’re feeling drained it’s likely because you’ve been pouring those resources ur energy and ur power into people and things that don’t truly deserve them. It’s time to release them. Allow others to handle their work stress. Allow them to deal with their drama.let the noise of the world—endless opinions, constant demands, and unnecessary distractions—to continue without you. Instead, redirect your focus inward. Reclaim your energy and channel it into creating your own peace and calm.By doing this, you protect your time and prioritize what truly matters. And as a result, you’ll no longer feel exhausted—you’ll feel empowered and in control.take break from everything and recharge

Q4: How can practicing mindfulness improve daily life?

Answer : Practicing mindfulness can significantly improve daily life by helping you stay present and fully engaged in the moment, reducing stress, and improving emotional regulation. When you’re mindful, you’re less likely to get caught up in regrets about the past or anxieties about the future, which allows you to approach situations with greater clarity and calmness. It enhances your focus, making you more productive and less distracted throughout the day. Additionally, mindfulness fosters self-awareness, helping u better understand your emotions and respond to problems and challenges with patience rather than impulsiveness !

Q5: Why is it so hard to stick to new habits?

Answer : Because our brain are lazy ! Our brains LOVES routine and sticking to what’s comfortable, even if that means doing things that don’t serve you. When u try to start a new habit for example like exercising or journaling, your brain sees it as extra work and throws every excuse at you to avoid it. Plus, most people go too big too fast, expecting overnight results, and when they don’t see progress right away, they quit. The solution is Start small SO small it feels almost ridiculous Want to start working out? Do five pushups. Want to journal? Write one sentence. Your brain won’t resist tiny changes, and over time, those small steps snowball into habits that actually stick. Consistency beats intensity every single time daily reminder DON'T GIVE UP

Q6: How can I manage my time better as a student?

Answer : Managing time effectively as a student requires planning and A LOOTTTT OF DISCIPLINE Start by creating a daily or weekly schedule that includes all your classes, study time, and personal activities (buy a planner it's not that expensive + u can use digital planners !). Prioritize tasks by urgency and importance, focusing on what needs to be done first. Break larger tasks into smaller and more manageable chunks and set specific goals for each study session. Avoid distractions by creating a quiet, organized study space and limiting access to social media during work time pleaseeee Remember to take breaks to recharge and don't forget to get enough sleep

[ Part 2 soon !]

@bloomzone

[saturncoyote]

Remembering this one addition i got to my analysis post recently that got me thinking... yeah it IS pretty strange that Creek is one of the only villains who's main reason for being hated isn't even rooted in his actions but his personality (the only other one i can think of where this is the case is maybe Crimp and that's it), villains who have done just as bad or even worse things than him are loved for their funny and loveable moments while he's thrown aside to rot in the sidelines

Plus with the movie's pattern of redeeming those villains with loveable personalities while refusing to give Creek a chance to redeem himself, even in the cartoons where he's still written as at best a annoying side character, it does leave a weird implication where only characters that are likeable are deserving of a second chance, like i said in my analysis: he shouldn't NEED to be perfect to deserve a nicer fate

There's also this weird misconception that comes with him being unlikeable where people will straight up refuse to see his actions from his perspective or even imply that he was given chances to escape or change his mind when there is no indication of that happening in the movie, like he isn't allowed to be a victim just because he's annoying, to ignore what he went through just because you don't like him as a character leaves a bad taste in my mouth

Don't get me wrong, he's annoying and bad and that's the point of his character... but WHY is that the point ? How does that add to his character ? Yes he's meant to be a wake-up call for Poppy about positivity not always being the answer but that's not even done correctly, why is he put into terrible situations out of his control if we're not suppose to feel sorry for him ? Why does his personality do a complete 180 once he betrays Pop Village ?? Is truly all of that JUST so Dreamworks can have an excuse to not give him a redemption ? His writting is so all over the place and it frustrates me to no end

[holyhadesimweird]

as you wish

pairing : knight!ichigo kurosaki x princess!reader

summary : ichigo has no choice but to take you away. after all, it is his duty to protect you, no matter the cost. and now, ichigo has to make sure the love of his life is not found.

word count : 1.2k

warnings : swearing, abusive family, me not knowing how to cook in medieval times

note : this isn't gonna be completely accurate to medieval times, but just go with the flow okay?

༶┈⋇⊶⊰✿⊱⊷⋇┈⋇⊶⊰✿⊱⊷⋇┈୨♡୧┈⋇⊶⊰✿⊱⊷⋇┈⋇⊶⊰✿⊱⊷⋇┈༶

saying a goodbye to renji, ichigo continued leaning against the doorframe to watch you. you had taken a blanket and a book, and set up a little area for you to read while he talked with renji inside.

this was no ordinary situation you found yourselves in. you were a princess, and he was your knight. however, those titles were a thing of the past.

about half a year ago, you'd had to escape from your life as royalty. your father was not a good man. he was abusive and was going to force you to marry an old duke in the name of 'forming an alliance'. when your father announced his intentions of marrying you off, you had immediately begged him to reconsider. he would hear none of it and afterwards, you bore a black eye in consequence.

before that instance, you thought you had been doing an excellent job at keeping your father's violence towards you a secret from ichigo. but, he was your knight and of course had known for a long time, however, both your lives were threatened by your father in order to keep him in line and to keep him silent.

when ichigo had realized there was no changing your father's mind and that this would only be the continuation of an awful life for you, he planned for you both to run away.

the night ichigo snuck you out of the castle was also the same night he confessed his feelings for you. he hated the thought of what your father was trying to force you into and couldn't bear the thought of you married to someone else. but he knew that no matter your feelings towards him, he would help you escape if that's what you wanted.

to his surprise, when he was done confessing, you'd practically thrown yourself into his arms and kissed him with all your might.

that same night with the help of some of your handmaidens, you and ichigo ran away. it took a week of almost non-stop travel for you to reach the village that ichigo was born and raised in.

karakura village was the perfect place to hide you in. ichigo had his friends and family here. no one here liked your father as ruler and would most rather spit in his face, and any of his officials, than talk to anyone about you, even if they knew your real identity.

the first month was hard on you. it wasn't easy running away from your home and to change lifestyles. but, you adjusted well and ichigo could tell you were happier here than in the castle.

"you're staring." ichigo heard you say. snapping out of his thoughts, he focused on you again. you had stood up, blanket and book in arm, and were now making your way towards him.

“how could i not when i have the most beautiful woman in front of me?” he questioned, a smile forming on his lips.

“how was renji?” you asked, now in front of him.

“he’s good, him and rukia are doing well as well. he wanted to tell me that rumour has it, we’ve died.” he informed you.

“my father thinks we’re dead?” you looked at him with something in your eyes, hope maybe?

“it would seem so. but it wouldn’t hurt to keep being on the lookout for anything that could put you in danger.” he replied, tucking a strand of hair behind your ear. "i've asked if some of the men could keep an eye on the newcomers for anything suspicious."

“us in danger ichigo.” you said, a serious look on your face. "you know i don't like it when you try to exclude yourself from my future. you're not going to die protecting me, i won't allow it."

"well, my princess, as you wish. now, what do you say? should we go inside and make dinner? i know you're hungry."

"shut up you idiot. you're the one who's hungry."

“…why would you ever think that?”

＊*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚　　˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚＊

“you really think this is a good idea?” renji asked ichigo. the two had returned to your cabin, where the rest of the now large group were spending time together while they were gone.

"i'm scared renji." ichigo confessed, taking a deep breath. "i was her knight, the one entrusted to protect the princess and i stole her away. her father was a piece of shit and i took her away. i'm scared that one day, when we've finally stopped worrying about him, that he's going to come and take her away from me."

"they announced the princess' death was a result of consumption. i don't think they suspect anything and would come for you." renji told his friend, who was looking at a dagger in his hands.

"i know. but i can't help but fear that this beautiful life we've started for ourselves is going to disappear one day." ichigo continued. "it's why i'm going to teach her to defend herself. it'll bring me peace of mind and help her become more confident in going out into town."

"it is an honourable thing to do, you know. to keep protecting and defending her. to give her the opportunity to do most things women in other regions can't do."

"thank you renji. now let's go see what the women have been up to without us." ichigo said, opening the door to your cabin.

the cabin was filled with laughter as renji and ichigo walked in. the house smelled of freshly baked bread and delicious meats that you were currently taking out of oven.

"ichigo! renji!" orihime exclaimed. "you're just in time. we just finished making dinner."

"did you find what you wanted?" uryu asked ichigo, knowing why the two went into town today.

"he did. now, what did we miss while we were gone?" renji asked, taking away the attention from the errand.

＊*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚　　˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚＊

"you had this made for me?" you asked, looking at the dagger ichigo held in his hands.

after everyone had left for the night, you two made your way to your shared bedroom in order to prepare for bed. you'd just sat down on the bed when ichigo had told you he wanted to talk to you.

"i did." he confirmed. he was currently kneeling in front of you as you sat on the bed. "i know your father thinks we're dead and is covering it up so we most likely don't have to worry about him anymore... but to be honest with you, i'm scared. i'm scared that one day i won't be able to protect you and i need to know that you can protect yourself."

"oh ichigo..." you said softly, placing the blade down on the nightstand and taking his face in your hands. he leaned into your touch, closing his eyes. "nothing will happen to me. but i will learn how to wield this dagger for you."

"thank you my dear." ichigo said, opening his eyes to look at you again.

"now, if you don't get in this bed and cuddle me, i will throw a royal sized tantrum ichigo!" you exclaimed, making the man laugh loudly before tackling you into the bed.

[yuriko-44]

symbol of fear: main bnha dr !!

This is my main bnha dr!! I consider this to be a pretty personal desired reality because of the reasons I want to shift here.

This is probably the most intense reality I'm shifting to. In fact I've thought about it for literally 2 years before deciding to start scripting. This is the dr I'll talk about the most in my blog, so keep this in mind!!

The reason why I decided to start this blog, aside from helping me and hopefully others with motivation, was because I really wanted to talk about this dr. I needed a place where I could talk about it freely, but my notes app wasn't really doing it for me. So here I am!! And also who knows, maybe I'll find someone with a similar dr too!!

before reading: why do I want to shift to this dr? Where do I begin? Well, I absolutely hate this reality. Everything is going to shit and I really want out of here, plus I really don't like myself- but this could apply to my wr and other drs as well. So why this one in particular? In 2019, while I was making my first ever script, I immediately thought about a flawless world. Then, in 2020, I went on a 4 year shifting break. After two years, in 2022, I wasn't done with my break but I was trying to pick up shifting again. That's when I looked back at my script. Coming from an extremely flawed reality, the idea of shifting to that perfect world seemed…underwhelming. I'd feel like a coward, hiding away in a perfect world instead of fighting for a better life- I know there's nothing wrong with it, in fact my wr is some kind of perfect world, but it wouldn't be as gratifying as I'd like it to be. I absolutely hate the society I live in and I feel completely useless here. I want to go to a reality in which I serve a purpose and things actually get better. That would be a satisfying reality to go to.

So this is basically what this dr is about. A reality in which I serve a purpose, a reality in which actual justice will be served, a reality in which society at large will learn and grow from its mistakes, a reality where everyone will feel heard and have a chance at life. A reality in which the world will change into something beautiful and life will begin to feel like it's worth living, like it should.

But why bnha? Because not only I've been hyperfixating on it for an extremely long time and I'm really attached to it, but also because justice and society are really important topics in canon, so I was really drawn to it when I decided to script and go to a reality such as this.

summary of contents:

my dr self • plot and main events • important people • miscellaneous

last update: january 25th 2025

← previous [main wr] || next [???] →

my dr self

If you read everything until now, you're either thinking that I'm a pro-hero/hero student or you're doubting that because of the name I gave to this dr and the picture of Shigaraki at the start of this post. Well, here's the most 'controversial' part of my dr:

In this reality I'm not a hero. I'm a morally ambiguous villain.

And if you happen to have seen the post about my wr you might be wondering why I didn't put a picture of my dr self at the beginning of the post like I did in the other one.

I actually did. That's me. In this dr I'm Shigaraki Tomura.

A morally ambiguous villain that, at least in my dr, ends up actually doing something amazing.

→ “Moral ambiguity: a lack of certainty about whether something is right or wrong”

→ “Morally ambiguous refers to situations, characters, or actions that do not have clear ethical implications and can be interpreted in multiple ways.”

→ “Morally ambiguous characters can start off with good intentions and then be driven to evil by others or by society, or they can start off evil and come to redeem themselves. Alternatively, they can remain ambiguous and complex throughout the whole narrative, and leave the reader to make up their own mind about them.”

This is the most difficult part to explain about my dr, but I'm going to try my best to make it understandable:

I always find myself relating to Shigaraki in one way or another. If you knew me in real life, I'm sure you could kinda see the similarities.

When I first started to script this dr I tried countless times to basically make an original character to insert myself into the bnha universe. But it'd always, and I mean always, end up being really similar to Shigaraki, like some kind of bad rip-off- it was just uncanny, really. I'm one of those people who whenever they start hyperfixating on a series they attach themselves to one character...so this kinda explains it- but that aside, as I already said, I relate to Shigaraki, a lot. I'm genuinely not surprised I couldn't come up with something original in this case.

And then it just kinda…made sense- it made more sense for me to shift to a reality in which I'm him instead of trying to insert myself into the bnha universe being a cheap copy of him.

I really don't know how else to explain it, but it just feels right for me.

So yeah…Shigaraki Tomura from the Shigaraki Tomura series-

I don't have anything to say about my dr self, really. He's Shigaraki Tomura, that's it basically- according to my interpretation of the character, that is!!

plot and main events

When I first shift to this reality it'll be the 4th of April 2124, my 19th birthday. I'm still confused on when bnha is set canonically, I keep hearing it's in the present or an hypothetical future, so I picked future. In 2124 the class 1A students are going through their last year of middle school and in 2125 they'll be in the first year of UA and I'll turn 20. I decided to shift a year before canon events to kinda get used to a new reality- I know that once I get there it'll feel absolutely normal, because it is, but I'll do that anyway. Also because I don't want to shift and immediately be forced into utter chaos…and because I want to spend time with Kurogiri without worrying too much about being caught!! (since after the USJ Attack the public will know the LOV is a thing)- for context: he's not 100% like he is in canon, go to the "important people" section for more info!!

Everything will be like canon bnha, but there are some changes. For example the War Arc is almost completely different, consequently the Post-War is not even close to canon. The war will start like canon, but there will be no hero or villain deaths. After the war society will begin to change (in a good way) and me, the LOV and people like us will finally be able to actually have a chance at life. Does this mean there's zero criminal/villain activity? No, but it'll be significantly reduced and will be dealt with way better than it was before. There are other changes, but those aren't as important as the ones I already mentioned.

Another thing I feel like I have to mention is the fact that, as I said earlier, I'm an ambiguous villain who commits ambiguous actions. Although more than half of everything I do is not my fault (All For One), that doesn't mean that I won't be responsible for at least some of those actions. I'll be accountable for the acts that are exclusively my fault (so there's no proof of them deriving from All For One's influence- or maybe I just straight up admit it), but not for the ones that derive from All For One's manipulation and grooming. But neither me or anyone in the LOV will be given life in prison or a death sentence. We'll spend a lot of time in the hospital, unsurprisingly to absolutely no one- but not just any hospital, it'll be like a prison's hospital, so regular civilians aren't treated in the same building as us. After that we won't be immediately free, we'll probably be staying…somewhere under surveillance- I don't know- and then we'll be under probation and then finally we'll be completely free!! Is it realistic? Probably not for this reality, but that reality is different and society will undergo a massive change too, so it makes sense to me.

...also after all of this I'll be spending my life with the LOV and my s/o- me when I can find love as a ex-criminal in another reality and I can't pull anyone in the cr: 🤡

Once I shift to this dr I'll forget about what I've scripted and the plot (only when I'm in this dr- so when I'm in my wr or any other dr I'll remember everything)- EXCEPT: I shifted, I can't and won't die, I can't get traumatised in any way, it's going to end well, other safety things like that.

important people

I absolutely love everyone in the LOV, but I'm not going to talk about everyone or this would be an endless post. I'll talk about three people for now: the first is basically a family member, the second one is my future s/o (we'll be together after the war) and I can't wait for the third's slow and painful death.

Kurogiri !!

In my dr, Kurogiri isn't 100% like in canon, but he isn't too different either. In canon he basically lacks a mind of his own, bound to listen and obey All For One's commands and whatnot. He's a highly intelligent nomou, but that's just so he can better assist All For One and all. In my dr there's still a trace of that, but he's quite different.

In the early phases of 'testing', so not too long after he was created, a certain event took place that influenced his 'programming'. He began to progressively act less and less like some kind of machine and instead acted more like a normal person. But never in front of All For One (and heroes once canon events will begin in my dr). Not only because he wasn't completely independent and still couldn't disobey him, but also because there could've been consequences (he could've been 'reprogrammed', losing the progress he's made, or worse). All For One would've probably done something about it, but he noticed this once it was way too late.

Canonically Shigaraki has been staying with All For One since he was 5 and he's now 20, in my dr it's no different. And Shirakumo was killed when he was in his second year of UA, so he was probably around 17. If you consider Eraserhead's age, since they were in the same year, then this would make Kurogiri 30 years old, his age in my dr. If you do a little bit of math: when Kurogiri was killed at 17, I (and canon Shigaraki too) was 7, I was already with All For One. In my dr it didn't take too long to make Shirakumo into Kurogiri, it took around a year. We met when I was 8 and he was 18. So we've known each other for a really long time.

After the event that changed Kurogiri's programming, we began to properly bond. All For One couldn't just change or get rid of him, losing Kurogiri would have affected me greatly. That could've impacted his plans for me. So as long as Kurogiri 'doesn't do anything funny' he's free to stay the way he is. Little does All For One know that he'll continue to get more and more independent until, after the war, he'll be truly free to be himself.

We bonded especially when I was around 14, when All For One died to All Might (and then got revived by Garaki). Since All For One wasn't in the way, Kurogiri had a little bit more freedom and that was absolutely amazing!!

He's my older brother. The best older brother there is.

He took care of me, he taught me stuff, he gave me company, he listened to me, he made me feel better whenever I felt miserable and so much more. And he still does. He, alongside the LOV, is the main reason why I'm so determined to shift to this reality.

I've never shifted there before but I miss him greatly.

Spinner !!

I don't have a lot to say about Spinner actually. He'll be my best friend (I say 'will' because when I'll first shift there we won't know each other)…and my s/o after the war!! When I first started scripting this dr I wasn't thinking about having a s/o, it didn't really seem to fit. But as time passed I started feeling more attached to the people in my dr and whenever I found myself thinking about him…I don't know, scripting him as my s/o just felt right- everything in this script is based on a 'it feels right for me' feeling!!

So yeah: acquaintances to friends to lovers I guess LMAO!!

Also, a little fun fact: in the cr I have a necklace with a little gecko!! The base is silver and it's divided into 4 sections. In each one of those sections there's a (fake) flat gem. Also I got extremely lucky because on one side it's more green, on the opposite side it's more light blue and in the middle the two colours kinda mix together in a cool gradient. Me when green = Spinner and light blue = my dr self-

All For One. . .

Alright, what can I say about this man?- the term 'man' doesn't even suit him, this is a fucking monster- thank god I can script whatever I want and I scripted lots of things for safety!! Most of those safety things are related to this guy- they apply to everything, but mainly him and his actions.

I still have to register the fact that for a long time (until the war starts) I'll consider this man my ally- like- the one that saved me and shit- god damn-

Anyway-

PRAYING FOR HIS DOWNFALL🙏🏻‼️

Can't wait to kick his ass!!😘🥰😍

(I don't know what else to say actually-)

miscellaneous

...

[miss-lone-wolf]

so like I am not British, but wolfblood was my shit when i was younger (you never forget the first show you styed up all night bingeing). And I am a masive Maruaders fan.

So for this AU to work for me, whit both the carachters personalytyes and stories and madyan as a couple and still having these characters have the roles of the core maruders boys(honestly most of these are based on their roles in the group, atleast for Maddie and Rydian). It in my head could not be a wolfstar fic. As i don't see Maddie as the Remus of the group.

okay, so first we need to astablish how is how between the maruaders and the wolfblood gang:

Maddie is in my head James, mostly because of the simalereties in home life situations and roles witin the group. The only child with two loving and well meaning parents, even when Maddie thinks they are being ufair or unresnable, they do the things they do and make the decitions the make because they want to protect Maddie and the sceret and they genuinly belive the way they do things will acoplish that. (the side tangent about Maddies parents is over now) And Maddie is the glue that holdes the groupe togheter in wolfblood, just like James is for the Maruaders(in my opinion). Tom and Shannon would never have become friends with Rydian witout Maddie. And I genuinly belive all four of them were actuall friends by the time Maddie left the show.

In this AU i would have Rydian be Sirius. I chose to have Rydian be Sirius mostly becouse of the difficult home life simalerety, as we know that Rydian grew up being bounced around the foster care system and we know that Sirius had a bad home life. We can also exchange Siriuses pasion for music in fandom, for a pation for a nother art form in the form of Rydians talent for drawing.

From prity much the first moment I saw this I have imagend Shannon as Remus (you see now why I said it wouldn't be wolfstar). I imagned Shannon as Remus because (I am bad at explaning things in writen form som bear with me here) we can exchange Remus being a werewolf from a young age with Shannons obbsesion with the beast on the moeres, in this version i would have Shannon have an obbsesion with the creatures in the forbiden forest, in this version the obbsion would stem from Shannon having grewn up in Hogsmead. She would then have grewn up being told not to go near the forest and warnings about the forest, but one day curyosety got the better of her and she went in to the forest and she either saw something or something happend that sparked her obbsesion with the forest and its creatures. I also belive that glasses is the worlds most widley acppted disabilety acomidation and because of that I belive that needing glasses is a disabilety (all disabiletyes excists on a spectrum and some people genuinly can't funtion without their glasses, i belive Shannon is one of those people) (you can't change my mind on this so don't even try).

That leavs Tom as Peter. Tom didn't realy fit as any of the others and we don't realy have a lot of information about pre-1981 Peter, so he is the carachter we have the most creative fredom with.

So on to some plot points in this Universe

this is a no voldemort universe

Maddie, Shannon and Tom are childhood bestfriends in this universe, because their parents were friends and they would often sett up playdates for their kids, considering they are all the same age and so they could aslo hang out.

Rydian is brought in to their group in their first year.

From about the end of their 3. year or early in their 4. year Maddie and Rydien start having felings for each other, but they don't figure out that the felings are mutual until after they become animaguses (I am a sucker for mutual pining ok).

in their fifth year they all disaide to become animaguses to help Shannon go into the forest, to figure out what actualy happend that day in the forest all those years ago.

Maddie and Rydians Animal forms are wolfs(for reasons i hope are obvious to everybody), I belive Shannon would either be a red squirel, and Tom would be zebra.

I belive that there is some level of coralation between what animal someone becomes and were they genetacly have their roots, so someone from Asia or of Asian decent are more likely be an animal comonly found in Asia or someone from Africa, of African decent is more likely be an african animal, native americans are more likley to become an american animal and so on. This came about so that people could more esaly blend in to their local Fauna.

This is all I have for this AU (+ some general headcannons of mine)

You know what guys, I think we British marauders fans are missing out on some huge potential here…

…like the possibility of a marauders x wolfblood AU? GOLDDUST. ABSOLUTE GOLDDUST.

Please tell me this lot aren’t so marauders adjacent… the school setting.. the werewolf characters… it’s just *chef’s kiss* beautiful.

Real question though, which of the marauders would you loosely cast as each wolfblood character?

Like could these divas be Wolfstar in another universe?

And I’ll let you guys decide who these cool kids most resemble :)

Northern girlies and British marauders fans… it’s time to get COOKINGGG !👩‍🍳

[somegrumpynerd]

Actually it turns out I had more thoughts about that post that I forgot about lol

Would Nightmare actually give up his boys? Yes and no

If it was just a black and white situation of they're miserable, they don't wanna be here, they have somewhere better to be, then yes. He would leave them out to wherever they needed to be despite his own feelings and very quickly realise afterwards just how much he'd gotten used to the noise and company. I think he would get a little clingy with Dream about it, which I'm sure Dream would find very weird after everything but not unwelcome, he did miss his brother after all.

(If he couldn't attach himself to Dream's side for whatever reason, I think he might just sit in his castle and go insane. Or maybe he'd just spend all day at Ccino's trying really hard to project that he just likes the atmosphere and isn't lonely as hell)

But the thing is, most of them don't have somewhere better to be. Horror has his au, and Nightmare would keep up the supply of food even if Horror said he wanted to quit at this point, so he would understandably let him return home. Killer, Dust and Cross effectively don't have aus anymore though, and they tend to get into self-destructive habits when they're left to their own devices. (Obviously bringing Color and Epic into the mix to make sure Killer and Cross are taken care of eases matters, but Dust doesn't really have any friends outside their group he could go stay with - that Nightmare knows about at least).

The flipside of this is that his boys may not necessarily want to be given up. I think if Nightmare got really in his head about this he could easily end up convinced this is the right thing to do without ever asking them if it's what they want, with potentially terrible results. He's established such a pattern of always returning to find Killer when they get seperated, that if he never showed up Killer might just keep sitting there and waiting for him greyfriar's bobby style, refusing to leave because he's certain his boss is coming back.

[brown-little-robin]

I think I'm in the "conscious incompetence" stage of being a social animal in the real world and it sucks so majorly. bro what do you do after you realize you're bad at socializing and then in-person interaction gets harder because you know you're failing at it now.

[sulky-cabbage]

AU: Where Sukuna Wins

Part 1

Part 2 here

Imagine an alternate universe in which Sukuna triumphs, dominates over Japan, and endures a lonely existence for many centuries, while allowing some humans to live.

They hold a grudge against him, of course, and want to kill him. They train at Jujutsu High and have some great fighters that occasionally provide Sukuna with some entertainment. 

They are so desperate for salvation, they can only find solace in prophecies about a figure with powerful blue eyes that will defeat the king of curses and rescue Japan.

And do you know what Sukuna does in response to that? One might expect him to go full Pharoah mode and kill newborns, but NO!!

HE DOES THE COMPLETE OPPOSITE !!

Whenever he ravages a village and devours the women and children, he ALWAYS spares the blue-eyed infants.

All the curses know better than to kill an infant with blue eyes. The last time a curse did that, Sukuna made sure to make an example of it.

Killing a member of the Gojo clan is also off limits, as well as anything that could delay the reincarnation of this certain person.

These humans are not the only ones waiting for salvation.

Sukuna is also WAITING...for his wretched existence to end at the hands of this person.

The ONLY one worthy of having the honor to do so.

[idliketobeatree]

@dont-offend-the-bees okay my darling first of all

AND SECOND OF ALL. i am gobsmacked by your commentary, thank you for taking the time to write these tags despite the cold sickly weather day!! you picked up on so many things i usually only hope people will find, and it feels like the biggest prize that you scored so many!!

(we both agree on charles in the middle supremacy <3)

and the way you described their individual voices!! excuse me! plucked them out of my brain but better! absolutely brills detail cought that you can technically read them as separate and they will make sense, but you feel there's something lacking all the same, waiting on the sidelines, and that only when they're together there is true harmony.

i hope you don't mind me turning this reblog for the director's cut for the poem!!

so here are my scattered thoughts:

starting out, i had to think about how each character would feel about their developed relationship. how it makes their life more rich? what would change about their self-perception? what can they take for themselves?

trying to breach the gap between magical and time-suspended in centuries cat king, and quite young in terms of their afterlife edwin and charles. especially charles.

charles in the middle, because this is an equilateral triangle, not a love corner around edwin; not payneland + ck, not catwin + charles. nothing wrong with those! just not the vibes i wanted

the most challenging part is not even the melding, but balancing between (what i imagine to be) their inner voice and actual poetic phrases. i don't want to feel restrained by their vocabulary, but sometimes finding the sweet middleground means you need to take down a notch of poetics for their voices to be still believable.

charles finding the strength within himself to heal-- with their combined power and support. he always includes himself in the picture. "six arms to form / all the goo inside of me" or "three dimensional beings": he recognises himself as part of the trio and he knows he doesn't have to do this alone

there's a wondrous, analysing part of edwin's brain that's somehow pleasantly surprised by this situation; he can't help but wonder what he'd be missing out on.

this poem is basically a playground. i've shown you four games these kids like to play, and they're bound by rules, but there are about ten more hidden mini-games in there. for example:

hurray! you can pick and pluck the lines from each individual poem to make new meanings! i underlined just four options.

charles' poem makes similar sense, but takes on different personal priorities if you read it from the bottom to the top

AND technically you CAN pair them up, the poems. edwin's and charles' work together well. so do charles' and tck's. it's vital for them to have a dialogue, the partnership wouldn't last otherwise.

edwin's and tck strong connection is implied, but they're on opposite sides for a reason. tck already feels a bit on cloud nine about the whole arrangement and i feel like. charles grounds him? keeps him from seeing god in edwin's eyes, you know?

THE STRUCTURE: a bit silly, but it does looks like charles is reaching out to both of them. i'm emotional about it.

AND ALSO. the closest they ever get during the line "the moment of crowning / clarity on where you stand, double-adored / a chance i never stood", because it's REALLY something that brings them together. you can't argue with that. ghostcat to me only works if all puzzle pieces fall into place, there is clear communication, there is love from all sides, the humbling and mortifying realisation that you can't be loved and protect yourself at the same time-- and in order to do that, you must get uncomfortably close.

i think that's it! thanks for reading to the end, and see you in the next poems <3

dead boy detectives contrapuntal poems — 4 — (1) (2) (3) for @dont-offend-the-bees, @dear-monday and @tw0-ravens <3

(click for better quality ✳️)

[kenobster]

seriously, i am so sorry to anyone i have ever called brave for literally just doing the things that are required for existing lol, it's so fucking annoying

[dandyshucks]

hey okay everyone pump the brakes for a second please. i wrote up a proper post with a few different questions to consider but honestly I don't want to touch this whole situation considering I am not involved in any way (I don't know anyone involved and I only took a cursory glance at the situation after seeing a post about it). but i am concerned that this is the second time i've seen a fairly hasty callout post within the selfship community being made about a Black blogger (not the same person twice, two entirely different people and different situations).

I would just like to invite you to please take a second to look into a situation yourself and think about if it is really worth a callout post being made before reblogging/creating it yourself. especially if the blogger in question is a person of colour.

oftentimes it feels like things get blown out of proportion and people are very quick to sound the alarms for a fairly mild situation that would be easily resolved by hitting the block button. is this person really a genuine threat to a wide group of people (are they exhibiting behaviour that is ongoing and consistent in seeking out people to harm), or did they simply make a one-off post that was a bit mean and then got annoyed when people shouted at them in their inbox and DMs?