#i don't know much longer i can hold on. i don't think i want to much longer

[lunebulous]

Playing with your body in non-sexual ways

A.N: This is my first time writing fanfiction. Any feedback is very much appreciated. I hope you enjoy! I have no idea what tags to put here so, just trust me bro. cw: thigh worshipping (zayne), plus-size reader (rafayel).

Xavier

There wouldn’t be a lot of occasions where his caresses would be in a non sexual way - that's why he's known to be a wolf in sheep's clothing. But don't get me wrong, being sexual does not equal condescending or rough. Not for him. - well, sometimes. - It's just that if he focuses too long on your face when you’re sleeping soundly, or when you're admiring the lantern lights at another festival, he gets this sensation that he should own you once more, just to be sure you're his. 

So when he kisses, it's only to leave you wanting more of him.  So when he caresses your body, it's only to let himself know he's the one making your skin get goosebumps.  So when he embraces all of you in a tight hug, it’s only to feel like you’re finally real this time.  And when all of these inevitably turn into that feeling of ownership again, he frowns internally. Initially, he wishes that he was different and that he wouldn’t feel like this everytime he stops to think about you; But it's just so much love that it overflows from his heart, dripping right into the lowest part of his torso. When he realizes, he’s slowly kissing you against the wall again. He can’t help it, he's naturally drawn to you like a magnet. And that feeling gives place to a necessity, a craving that hurts so deliciously he gives up on being different. So when you gasp for air and tug at his hair to breathe a little, he just can’t understand why. Or how can you do this to him. He wants more. And more. And more. He needs it so bad he can’t help but pin your hands to the wall so he can kiss you longer, raveling in the way you squirm under him. After all, just because he can't help it, doesn't mean he's not enjoying every second of the fruits of his own possessiveness.

So he caresses you all the time - the problem is that it often turns into a primal need to own and to explore each cute face - each little sound - you make for him. He feels like a victim to his own desires. Poooor Xavier… (irony included).

Rafayel

Rafayel is completely enamoured by your hands, making sure to always kiss them whenever he gets the chance. When he doesn’t, he’s more than expected to caress them while you wait for food in a nice restaurant, or when you’re walking on the shore with him. He is the king of intertwining your hands all the time - never letting go even if for brief moments. He says his bodyguard should be aware of where he is at all times, and when you replied that having one of your hands busy would actually get in the way if danger arrives, he puffed his chest, saying something along the lines of “i’m lucky I have the best bodyguard that can fight 10 men with only one hand then!”. You sighed, giggling because of him. “You’re not actually expecting me to fight with 10 men without letting go of your hand, right?” “Well, I'm pretty sure that was on your job description when I hired you.”  “No it wasn’t.” “Now it is.”  --- He also kisses and grabs your stomach and love handles all the time, especially when lying down, like now. There were some times when it made you feel a little bit insecure, but he always buried his face on it with a big smile, hugging your waist. When you voiced your insecurity to him for the first time, he simply said: “Well, I never saw a painting of any muse that didn’t have enough body for me to drown in it. - he stares up at you intently, before looking at your stomach again. - In fact, it is the only scenario where drowning would be possible for me. - Now he’s getting a hold of your love handles. - And actually, i'd love it. Thank you, my muse!” Right before nuzzling his face on your belly again, giggling. You blush furiously, caressing his purple locks, but he’s too busy to see it.

Zayne

Zayne would always need a bit of a push to touch you like he wants to - and you know that. He’s slowly coming out of his shell and being more confident when it comes to being intimate with you, getting over his irrational fear of hurting you again. The ‘push’ he got today was seeing you come home after brunch with your friends, wearing a dark and muted red lipstick, blended on your lips so perfectly it reminded him of a vintage doll. He made a note to himself to compliment you later when you had your attention on him - because you were busy taking off your shoes, your coat and yapping about some BIG gossip you just found out. He listens attentively, putting two and two together with you as you happily stride towards him. 

You sit beside him on the couch and hug his arm, leaning on his shoulder. He places his hand between your thighs, trying not to pay too much attention to it - a task quite hard for him, as you were wearing light brown stockings that made your oh-so-loved thighs look even more bite-deserving; But he tries to shake the thought away. 

It doesn’t take long before you’re well-invested in the documentary he is watching, but the position is getting quite uncomfortable now, so you crawl between his legs and rest your back against his chest, both of you laying down on the chaise part of the couch. First he stares at you, finding adorable how you don’t hesitate before making yourself comfortable with him. He lays a chaste kiss on the crown of your head, making you snuggle against him even more, getting it just right like two puzzle pieces. And he swears to himself he’s a good man. He is not going to turn this into something more just because your ass grinded against him innocently, no, no. Breathe, you touch-starved man! 

But the same man now is fighting for his life to NOT look at your thighs, the stockings making them look so shiny for him, he couldn't help himself but imagine the shadows his fingers pressing onto your skin would look like. He imagined you in not-so-innocent lightings more than he’d ever admit, and as his thoughts stray away, he doesn’t notice how he’s been caressing your chest and collarbones for some time now, lightly using his fingertips to circle around your skin, as if memorizing each part of it. Then he's slowly directing his way to your neck, with four fingers on one side and his thumb on the other, going up and down with featherly touches as his eyes are glued to your legs, completely blank, admiring each curve going from the arch of your feet to your calves, and then to your thighs, stopping at the start of your tight skirt. Now he’s gripping your neck - just lightly pressing on it, your airflow is completely free. (for now). You can’t help but wonder what’s going on inside his mind, lying to yourself that feeling his firm hand around your neck is not making you want to rub your legs together, but you're already doing it a bit, discreetly, not knowing you’re being very thoroughly watched. As he’s breathing deeper to try to not get excited, you feel his hand slowly letting go of your neck and you whine inwardly at it. But then his hands hesitantly go higher, his slender fingers sliding across your chin to play with your lips as he remembered to compliment you. He opens his mouth to do it, but being so lost in thought he just stops. Staring at your legs with an empty gaze, completely out of it. God, they’d look so good around his cock. Fuck.  You look up, a bit surprised with his actions, slowly tilting your head to the side, looking at him. - the movement makes him get out of his trance, suddenly confused as to how his fingers got to your lips - but as if reading his mind, you part them, waiting. And then he gets it. The key to making himself touch you like he wants to is just to - not think. It makes sense, it's a part of him he never let himself explore. He then lets himself do what he wants, sliding his middle and index finger on your tongue, experimenting. As you close your lips around them, looking at him so puppy-eyed, he can't help but smirk as realizing he could get used to this very quickly. You start feeling him growing against your ass now.

He presses down on your tongue, smiling. “You look so beautiful wearing this color, love.”

So, Zayne doesn’t play with any part of your body - because as soon as he does it, he gets a problem under his trousers. And now that he knows how to let go of control, - you got one too.

Sylus

Sylus wouldn’t be the type of man to touch you without being full-on intentional with it. The same amount of hate he has towards ‘quickies’, he has for the idea of touching your most sensitive parts without being completely devoted to them. So when playing with you, it is usually filled with admiration and love, silently appreciating your presence by his side. That’s why you often find him mindlessly braiding your hair as you lay your head on his lap to watch a movie, or how he gently runs his fingernails - once claws - on your calf under the table when he’s discussing his next moves with the twins. Yeah, sometimes his hands wander a little bit higher, a little bit firmer, but always looking at you to watch your reaction; as if to just - test the waters, tease you to see your ears turn red.. or warm you up for what’s coming next.

[thisweknow]

I very much understand your frustration with the "you! are! valid!" Tumblr culture from the mid-2010s, that was something that honestly made me feel so isolated as a teenager. I hated hearing "it gets better!" and watching my life fall further and further apart with everyone telling me that it would all be fine one day. It felt hypocritical. It WAS hypocritical—to tell me my feelings and my experiences were valid and then to just absolutely steamroll me when I expressed my frustrations and fears.

I started to favor the phrase "everything changes" around the time I turned 16. I liked the idea of neutrality, it was something I'd seen as a suggestion relating to body positivity, which I struggle(d) with greatly. The basic premise was that if you couldn't say anything positive, try saying something neutral. Everything changes is neutral. It's not saying it'll get better necessarily, but not that it would be worse, either. It felt like the closest to a truth I could have. What I was dealing with in any given moment wouldn't last forever. Everything changes, my circumstances today are entirely different than my circumstances tomorrow, even if it doesn't always feel like it.

I've let that phrase carry me for years. In the bad moments I remind myself that everything changes, and the world parts that suck won't suck so immediately forever. In the good moments I remind myself that everything changes, and I should hold on to those and savor them for what they are, even if they're peppered in with the worst moments.

It's not to say that I don't remember the bad moments now—I very much do. I can remember a lot of the trauma of my childhood and if I let myself sit with it for too long I can feel what it was like to sit awake at 3 AM sobbing in my room wishing that I was no longer here. I don't think I will ever truly forget that. I can say that those parts aren't the part on my mind anymore. When I look back at my life I tend to look with rose colored glasses at the parts that were good. The moments I spent with my friends, the nights I'd sneak out to ride my bike in the peace and silence of the small town I lived in, the rehearsals for plays that I dreaded going to but loved being in, the way my dog would curl up at my feet and sleep there all night when I was sad—the list goes on. The bad parts are still very much remembered and acknowledged, but the good parts are the ones I think about and the ones I miss.

I know that I struggled for a long time with feeling guilty about having moments I looked back on that I didn't hate. This was especially true after leaving an abusive relationship. I knew the person I had left had been abusive and had done horrible things to me, that I had sustained damages that I wasn't sure I could recover from. Yet I still had moments I looked back on fondly. Moments where I had genuinely cared for my abuser, moments of sweetness and moments of joy, moments of calm and peace that I hadn't had with anyone else. I felt like looking at those moments somewhat fondly cheapened my experiences, as if it was somehow an admission of fraud to acknowledge that even the worst thing that had ever happened to me had its silver linings. It took years of therapy and dedicated self work to finally understand that abuse doesn't happen in a vacuum and that it's okay to miss those good moments, however many there might be, even when we know the overall situation was awful.

It's okay to savor the good things when they come your way. A journal entry from when I was about 17 sums it up really well: I don't want to be happy all of the time. If I was happy all of the time I wouldn't really feel happy anymore, would I? It would just be my normal, my neutral. I want to feel positive at least 75% of the time, that's my goal. I want to feel sad sometimes, too. I want to feel angry and hurt, I want to feel excited and happy and in love, too. I want to experience every emotion life has to offer, even the sucky ones. I don't think I would appreciate happiness if I didn't experience everything else, yknow?

btw you will miss this in 5 or 10 years. memory will smooth these circumstances down like a river stone, and you will find yourself longing for a shade of light or a moment of this particular innocence. you don't know about what happens next, and one day that will be the most alluring thing of all. don't leave it all for nostalgia. have a nice night now, whatever night it happens to be.

[woozinhos]

HMO!!! Lazy 3. Morning sex with Vernon 12. "You're so tight, baby."

ahhh this is just everything hope you enjoy anon <3

You slowly wake up, the sunlight streaming in through the curtains. You're wrapped in the warmth of Vernon's arms, his body pressed against yours from behind. As you stir, you can feel his hardness against your backside, and you realize he's already awake. He nuzzles his face into the crook of your neck, his breath hot against your skin.

"Morning," he murmurs, his voice still thick with sleep. "Sleep well?"

You let out a contented sigh, snuggling back against him.

"Mm, yeah," you reply, your voice still a bit husky from sleep. "But I think I'd rather be doing something else right now."

You can feel his lips curl into a smirk against your skin, and his hands start to roam over your body.

"Oh yeah?" he says, his voice low and husky. "And what would that be?"

His hands slide down to your hips, pulling you even closer to him.

"I think I know exactly what you want," he murmurs, his lips trailing a path along your neck and shoulder.

You can feel his hardness pressing against your ass, and you can't help but let out a soft moan as he rolls his hips against you.

"You're so responsive in the morning," he teases, his hands slipping under your shirt to caress your bare skin.

He continues to roll his hips against you, his movements slow and deliberate, teasing you with the promise of more.

"Do you think you can take me now?" he whispers in your ear, his voice low and rough with desire.

His hand slides down between your legs, his fingers brushing against your sensitive folds. He can feel how wet you are, and he lets out a low groan.

"Yes," you whisper, your voice trembling with anticipation. "I can take you."

"Don't move," he says, his hands gripping your hips tightly. "Just stay right there and let me take care of you."

You can feel his hot breath against your ear as he moves behind you, his body tensing with anticipation. He pushes your shorts to the side, revealing your bare skin to him. He reaches down and pulls his own shorts down just enough to free himself, his hard length pressing against your backside. He positions himself at your entrance, his hands still gripping your hips tightly.

"You ready for me, baby?" he whispers, his voice rough with desire.

Without waiting for your response, he pushes into you in one smooth thrust, filling you completely.

You let out a low moan, your back arching against his chest as you adjust to the feeling of him inside you. He buries his face in the crook of your neck, his arms wrapping around your waist as he holds you close. He stays still for a moment, giving you time to adjust to the feeling of him inside you. His body is tense, his muscles trembling with the effort of holding back.

"God, you feel so good," he groans, his voice muffled against your skin. "So tight and wet for me."

He begins to move, his thrusts slow and deliberate at first, savoring the feeling of being inside you. His lips trail kisses along your shoulder and neck, his teeth nipping at your skin as he picks up the pace.

His hands roam over your body, exploring every inch of you as he continues to move inside you. He slides one hand up under your shirt, his fingers finding your breast and teasing your nipple. His other hand moves down between your legs, his fingers finding your clit and beginning to rub it in slow circles. He knows exactly how to touch you, his movements perfectly calculated to drive you wild.

As he continues to move inside you, his body growing more desperate with each passing moment, he lets out a soft whimper against your skin. You can feel his exhaustion, the sleepiness still clinging to him, but it's clear that he's just as desperate for release as you are. His hips begin to stutter, his rhythm faltering as he struggles to hold back his own pleasure.

"I'm not going to last much longer," he groans, his breath hot against your ear. "You feel too good."

He starts to move faster, his thrusts growing more urgent as he chases his release. His fingers continue to work your clit, sending jolts of pleasure through your body. He's determined to make you come first, his own pleasure secondary to yours.

"Come for me," he urges, his voice strained. "I want to feel you come around me."

He bites down on your shoulder, the sharp sensation pushing you closer to the edge.

His words, his touch, his body - it's all too much. You feel the pleasure building within you, your body tensing as you approach your climax. With one final thrust, you're pushed over the edge, your body shuddering with the force of your orgasm.

You cry out his name, your muscles clenching around him as you come undone in his arms. He follows you over the edge, his hips jerking against yours as he spills inside you. He lets out a low moan, his body going taut as he rides out his own orgasm. He holds you close, his arms wrapped tightly around you as he buries his face in your neck.

For a few moments, the two of you simply lie there, breathing heavily as you come down from your highs. He nuzzles against your neck, his body still trembling slightly from the intensity of his release. The sudden appearance of the cat startles both of you, breaking the intimate moment.

You hear a soft "meow" as the cat jumps up onto the bed, its paws landing softly on the sheets. The cat circles around you both, clearly unaware of what it had just interrupted. You feel a soft chuckle rumble through his chest as he watches the cat. "Well, that's one way to kill the mood," he jokes, his arms still wrapped tightly around you.

You reach out and begin to stroke the cat, your fingers gently scratching behind its ears. The cat purrs contentedly, clearly enjoying the attention. It rubs its head against your hand, its tail twitching happily. He leans in and presses a soft kiss to your cheek, his lips lingering against your skin for a moment.

"Was I good?" he asks, a hint of playfulness in his voice. "Did I satisfy you, baby?"

You turn your head to look at him, a small smile playing on your lips.

"You were perfect," you say softly, reaching up to run your fingers through his hair.

He grins at your response, clearly pleased with himself.

"Good," he murmurs, his hands running up and down your body in a lazy caress. "Because I plan on doing it again...and again...and again."

[pretty-little-mind33]

Tangerine x stripper fem!reader

Mini-series summary: When Tangerine opened an underground strip-club to cover for his murder-for-hire business operation, he wasn't expecting to become so easily distracted by one girl in particular.

Chapter summary: Tension only intensifies after Tangerine's proposal and you and him grow much closer... (5k)

Warnings: SMUT (mdni), mentions of sex w*rk and slut shaming, pinv, insecure!reader, passionate sex, dom!tangerine and sub!reader undertones, praise, oral sex (f receiving), reader is kinda traumatized but tan is very sweet to her.

credit : my love @little-miss-dilf-lover 🤍

BAD FOR BUSINESS MASTERLIST

"She did what?" Lemon asks, his arms crossed, as he watches his brother finish counting the cash he always hands out on Sunday.

Tangerine doesn't look up, rounding up the envelopes quickly as he puts the cash inside. "She kissed my cheek," he says and sits up, running a hand in his hair. He looks exhausted. 

Lemon smirks, sounding scandalized. "And you're only telling me this now? Is this why she's been hovering around you since Monday?" 

"I don't know, Lem," Tangerine sighs.

"Well, aren't ya gonna elaborate on why she kissed you?"

"Kissed my cheek," Tangerine groans, shutting his eyes as he drops his head into his hands, "And I don't know why, I guess just because I drove her home. As a thank you, I suppose. Not a big deal, really—I don't know why I even mentioned it—" 

"Bullshit," Lemon sing-songs. "You're dancing around your feelings, as ya always do. You mentioned it because you want me to validate them, as per-fuckin-usual! To spell it out for you, as one says, as I have always fuckin' done. " 

"My feelings—or yours— aren't what's important here. It's hers and I don't know what she's feeling or thinking," Tangerine says and stands, taking the envelopes in his hand. "And anyway, I'm her boss. It's an abuse of power, innit?"

Lemon pauses for a moment and then shrugs, "Who cares if she has feelings for you too?" 

Tangerine narrows his eyes, very unsure, "I care. It still sounds scummy," he says and then hands Lemon the envelopes. "Drop these in the mailbox would ya?" He pauses and then he takes back the one with your name scribbled on the front. "Could you tell Y/n to come up here? I need to tell her something."

Lemon sends him a knowing look and a smile curls his lips. 

"Not like that," Tangerine deadpans, clearly unamused as he fiddles with the envelop anxiously, "She needs more money and she wants more shifts. I don't want that for her, you know she doesn't deserve that, not after what happened, so I'm just gonna give her a little extra cash—" 

Lemon's smile fades instantly. He looks at his brother with concern, "Mate, Leo won't like that—you really should be careful with—" 

Tangerine cuts him off, his expression serious. "I can handle Leo, Lemon, will you please just ask 'er to come up here?"

Lemon doesn't seem convinced but he nods. Tangerine looks down, gripping his desk and he collapses onto his chair again, holding his head in his hands. Why does Lemon have to question him all the fuckin' time? His jaw tenses, trying to shake the thought that his brother could have a point. 

He's lost in his thoughts when he hears your sneakers squeak up the stairs and then a knock on his office door. Instantly, he stands, trying to hide his smile as he calls out, "Come in, darlin'." When you do and he sees you, you're dressed in a blue dress that ends mid-thigh, a jacket, and laced-knee-high white socks. You really do look like anyone's wet dream, even when you aren't trying. Tangerine's cheeks burn and he represses the feeling. 

"Hi," you say, walking up to him.

Since the night he'd driven you home, you'd been less on edge with him. You've both had longer conversations and more stolen glances than you've ever had. Hell, he's even been spending some of your breaks with you. And he knows using the smoking excuse won't last forever.

He knows it and so do you, but neither of you mention it. 

"Hi," Tangerine says. He leans against his desk, his eyes roaming over you. His thumb swipes over the envelope and he clears his head, handing it to you, "Here's your pay." 

You look confused when you take it. Usually, he just puts those in the common mailbox. He has never handed one out personally. "Oh, thanks," you say and smile up at him. You open the bag that's hanging from your shoulder and tuck the envelope inside. 

Tangerine's eyebrows crease and he walks behind his desk again, looking for something in the drawer. 

You watch him curiously. "Tan, are you okay?" 

The nickname rolls off your tongue easily and an involuntary shiver runs up his spine. He almost regrets telling you you can call him that, if only because it makes him lose his mind just a little more than he usually does when he's around you.

Tangerine pauses as he thinks for a moment. He looks up, his expression still neutral as he walks back over and hands you a wad of bills. Your heart thumps as you take the money, even more confused. You flick your thumb over the paper, approximately counting how much it is. 

"What is this?" you ask, realizing there is almost four times the amount you make in a night in your hands. 

"A bonus," Tangerine says calmly as if this is nothing. "You said you're tryin' to save up for school and I don' want you workin' here any more than ya have to." He looks away, straightening himself. If he looks at you any longer, he'll break. "It's really nothin'," he adds.

"Nothing? This is a lot of money," you whisper, pushing the bills out to him again, "I can't accept this for no reason." 

Tangerine looks down at you, his eyes darkening a little as he shakes his head. His hands clasp around your wrists, his skin cold against yours, as he pushes your hands into your chest again. "You can."

"No, I- I really can't," you squeak, a little panicked. You don't know what this means. If this is really unconditional or if it will somehow bite you back in the ass. You trust him, sure, but he is still a man. You look down at the cash and then up into his eyes, your cheeks feeling unbearably warm. "D-do you want something in return?"

You're unsure about the question, but it wouldn't be the first time someone who is your boss has asked you for some extra services. 

Tangerine's cheeks immediately turn crimson and he drops your hands as if you'd burned him. "No!" he says hoarsely like he can't believe you'd even ask him that. "Bloody hell, no. That is not what I want!" He sounds almost scandalized and you panic. 

"Sorry! I assumed—"

"Well, don't! God, angel, you deserve so much better than that," Tangerine says breathlessly as if the words escape him in a rush. You pause, staring up at him as he says this, and those familiar butterflies you only feel when he's around burst in your stomach.

He always speaks so softly when you're around, always calling you darling or angel—it's seriously beginning to mess with your brain. 

"Just, take the money, please," Tangerine insists, "no strings attached."

You nod, adding the cash to your bag without another word. You pause and look up at him. You want to ask why he's doing this? What makes you so special? But instead, you ask something else; 

"What do I deserve?" 

Tangerine is a little taken aback by the question, his body going taut as he stares at you. "Pardon?"

Your chest tightens as you walk closer to him. You have no clue what you're doing. Men are usually so easy to read, so easy to seduce, and so very easy to fool.

With one look, you can have them wrapped around your little finger. But with Tangerine, it's completely new. You have no clue what works with him or what you even want from him. All you know is, you've never felt like this with anyone. Tangerine backs up. He inhales, clutching the edge of the desk as his breath hitches and his gaze stays on yours. 

"You said I deserve better," you whisper, dropping your bag to the ground. As if on cue, the lights from the lounge suddenly dim and you realize everyone else has gone home for the night. What are you even doing? You pause in front of him, your chest rising and falling as you lift your hand to press your palm on his chest. 

"What is better?"

Tangerine looks at you. His eyes are dark. He's not a stupid man. He knows what you're doing. He knows what you want. He just doesn't know if you even understand exactly what it is you're asking of him.

He's not used to feeling powerless so he stands up straighter and cups your jaw with his hand. He's still gentle with you; his fingers touching your skin reverently and loosening when you gasp in surprise.

"Why do ya do this?" He counters, his voice raspy. He pushes his body even closer to yours until he's so close he can smell you and fuck, you smell divine. 

"Do what?" you ask. 

Tangerine tilts his head, smirking, "You know what," he whispers and leans down so his lips hover near the shell of your ear, "Entertain men for money—bring them into that filthy little room," he pulls his head away a moment and glances towards the glass where he has an easy view of the door to one of the club's sex rooms, "and drain their fuckin' pockets. Hm?" 

Your stomach flips and your skin feels burning hot. Is he making fun of you? You try to shift your face from his hold but Tangerine doesn't let you. He looks at you and reads you like a book. "'M not making fun of you or calling you a slut, angel. I don't think you are one, you know that. Which is why I'm confused. I'm real fuckin' confused about why the sweetest and the smartest girl I've ever met hides behind some string of lingerie and flirty touches. Ya need validation that badly?"

You frown, his words hurting a little. But, you've started this so you have to take it from him. You can. You've taken much worse from men. You look into his eyes and keep your voice level. "You have no damn clue about my life, Tangerine, so you should stop assuming you know me."  

He frowns. "Yeah, you're right. I don't know a damn thing about your life," he pauses, searching your face. His mind is spinning and his gaze drifts to your lips. "But I want to." He isn't lying. He does want to know and some primal part of him wants to help. He wants to provide for you, and take you far far away from this life. 

It's not safe and you deserve so much more. 

"Let me guess, you want to 'take care' of me?" You say behind a mocking voice, your face still in his hand. "You're not the first man who's said that to me."

Tangerine's frown deepens and he strokes his thumb over your cheek. "Well, I know damn well I'm the first one who fuckin' means it," he growls, and the pull he's been feeling finally works because he's leaning in and kissing you.

You're a little surprised but you wrap your arms around his neck, pushing yourself up against him as you return the kiss.

He's kissing you passionately, his hands sliding down your cheeks and sides until he's gripping your hips. You've kissed many men but none have felt like this. It feels both overwhelming and wonderful. You run your hands in his hair, pulling on his curls. 

Tangerine spins you around, sitting you on his desk as he continues to kiss you. He's well aware this is very much fucked, but he can't help himself. The sounds you make against his lips are making him lose his mind. He cups your cheeks again, kissing along your jaw gently. The kisses last until he feels your hand slide down his torso to the zipper of his trousers and he hisses, disconnecting his lips from your skin. 

He stops your hand, fingers curling around your wrist, and you gasp, eyes shooting open. "I'm so sorry," you whisper, your voice small. Tangerine pauses as he calms his breathing. He looks into your eyes, his gaze softening as he shakes his head.

"You don't need to do that," is all he says as you drop your hand back to your lap. 

"But I do want to," you interject. Tangerine just shakes his head, caressing your cheek. 

"No, angel, I can't," he tries to explain. 

"Is it because you think I'm dirty?" 

Tangerine frowns, looking at you seriously now. "What?"

"Because I've been with other men—because you must think I'm easy—" you say, your voice shaky, "I- I'm not. I haven't had sex for money in a while, I promise I don't do it anymore and—and I was always safe. Please– I'm not dirty—" 

Tangerine can hear your panic and he tightens his hold on your face, gently shushing you. "Angel, I don't think you're dirty. I know ya take precautions. I know how this industry works, remember? I fuckin' own the place," he says with some disdain and then sighs, "which is exactly the problem. Kissing you was already a boundary I shouldn't have crossed. I'm your boss. I'm supposed to be better than this."

You look at him, relaxing a little as you begin to understand. "Tangerine, I don't care. No one has to know." 

He frowns, sending you a warning look. 

"I'm serious," you say and play with his tie a little, squeezing your thighs. His kisses have turned you on and now he wants to pretend it never happened? 

No fucking way. 

"I won't tell anyone. Please, I want you. Show me what I deserve," you whisper, pulling him closer so he's leaning over you as you kiss along his jaw.

Tangerine groans, his eyes closing as he enjoys the sensation of your lips. He's slowly losing control. This feels so right and he desperately wants to show you how a man is supposed to touch you. How he's supposed to love and care for you. His hands grip your hips, pressing his nose in your hair as he inhales.

"Fuck, angel, you're gonna be the death of me," he whispers, his resolve finally breaking. Still, he pulls away and lifts you onto your feet. "But, not here. I'm taking you home, if you'd like," Tangerine questions and you nod, your heart pounding. He smiles and takes your hand, squeezing it to reassure you as he picks up your bag and guides you towards the door. 

During the drive to his apartment, the tension is palpable. You shift in your seat, your cheeks warm, hooking your fingers under your panties as you pull them down your legs. You bite your lip, hearing the small inhale from Tangerine as his hands clench around the steering wheel. He's desperately trying to stay focused on the road.

You look at him, smiling, as you wrap your panties around the gear shift of his car. The faint, delicate, smell of your arousal fills the air and Tangerine curses underneath his breath.

"You naughty fuckin' girl," he mutters in your ear as soon you arrive in his apartment, his large hands palming your waist. He kisses you up against the wall of his living room for a moment until he swiftly hoists you up into his arms, your legs wrapped around his torso and he walks you to his bedroom. "'M gonna have to teach ya a lesson, hmm."

You expect something rough and dirty. You're used to rough and dirty. But, with Tangerine it's different. It's always different. When he lays you on the mattress and slowly kisses every inch of your kiss as he undresses you, your head spins. No one you've ever been with has been this slow and gentle. He's touching you like he's worshiping you and can't help but feel a little self-conscious when he finally has you naked. You lift your arms to cover your chest. 

"Tsk, none of that," Tangerine scolds as he lifts his head from where he was kissing your stomach and takes your wrists in his hands, pushing them away so he can admire you. "Fuck, you're the prettiest girl I have ever seen." 

You turn your head, hiding a moan in his pillow. He'll deal with that later, he thinks, as he looks down at your bare pussy. "Can ya open your legs for me, my angel? Can I make you feel good? Is that okay?" 

Your head is spinning and you nod, parting your legs. Tangerine pushes your thighs up and apart, kissing your inner thigh. He sucks some hickies for good measure as you moan, your hands fisting in his silk sheets.

"Oh, T-Tan," you whisper when you feel his breath hit your clit, your legs trembling. 

"I'm gonna take such good care of you," he whispers hoarsely and kisses your pussy, attaching his mouth to your clit. He takes his time with you, kissing and sucking. He listens to your cues, adjusting his position as much as you need him to. His mustache tickles your skin and you're a moaning mess.

You keep hiding the sounds you make out of embarrassment, either turning your head or biting your lip, and he's not having it. After tasting you, he climbs up over you and captures your lips in his. 

He wants you to taste yourself on his lips. You arch your back, unclenching your hands from the sheets as you wrap your arms around his shoulders. Tangerine's hand slides up your inner thigh as he slides his fingers up and down over your slit, occasionally teasing your entrance. "Can I?" He asks for permission and when you nod, he pushes one finger into you. 

You gasp, your mind going hazy. "I- I want to make you feel g-good," you whimper, your eyes teary as you try to keep them open and keep being good for him.

You're usually so good at this. At sex. You're so good at being exactly what the man wants you to be but Tangerine doesn't seem to want anything for himself and it's confusing and all you can do is let him lead you. He smiles, kissing your cheeks.

"You already are," he whispers, adding another finger as he opens you up for him. There is no way in hell you're giving him head, not when he guesses that's how you've had to pleasure the men that come into his lounge. He shivers with disgust.

This is for you and he can enjoy himself without forcing his dick down your poor throat. 

He continues whispering sweet nothings in your ear as your nails drag along his back. Once you're wet enough and he's lost most of his clothing and slid on a condom he keeps in his dresser drawer, he presses his cock against your pussy.

Your small wanton moans are music to his ears and he's definitely enjoying himself as he slowly pushes into you, keeping his gaze on yours for any sign of reluctance or discomfort. He's taking his time with you, wanting to memorize every position he has you in as he tells you he wants to hear you.

"D-do you want me on top?" you suddenly ask out of habit, still determined to please him. Tangerine shakes his head, keeping his arm behind your head as he caresses your hair. He's balls deep inside you now, the sound of flesh against flesh ringing in your ears, and your voice is breathless. Your head hits the pillows with every thrust he makes as you struggle to keep your eyes on him.

"No," he says sternly, "Just keep your eyes on me. There, good girl. Enjoy yourself," his voice is thick and raspy. He keeps a steady rhythm, teasing you and watching you fall apart. The sound of the city from outside becomes white noise and Tangerine isn't sure how long he's been fucking you but the sky is slowly becoming lighter. 

"Tan," you whimper as you pull him closer, shutting your eyes as his forehead rests on yours. "'M close," you tell him, wrapping one leg around his hip as you bury your face in his neck, you keep suppressing your moans even when he's told you he wants to hear you. 

"You can come but I want to hear you, angel," Tangerine groans, feeling close himself. "Can you do that for me?" 

You whimper, catching his gaze as you nod. You arch up into him, breasts pressed to his chest as you moan. You barely even recognize yourself. You're so used to the fake moans that the real ones sound so foreign. 

"Fuck me," Tangerine curses, holding you close as one of his hands grips the headboard tightly. The sound of his bed creaking and hitting the wall fills his ears. He can feel you clench around him, moaning as you finish, which triggers his own release and he squeezes his eyes shut.

Your hands relax on his back, your moans subsiding as your chest heaves. Suddenly, everything is silent and he's not sure what to do. He doesn't want to scare you and he himself has never really had sex with anyone he cared about as much as he does you. This is all new and he feels like if he makes a mistake, he could lose you forever. 

"You okay?" he whispers, his voice shaky. 

You nod and he pulls out, pulling off the condom and quickly leaning over his bed to discard it in the trash not far from his bed. When he pulls himself back up, he adjusts the blanket so it covers himself. You do the same, sitting up and pulling as much of the blanket over you as you can. 

Neither of you speaks for a moment. You're both simply staring at each other. You can't believe you just had sex with your boss and what might be worse is that you don't regret it. You know you should, but you don't. You can't bring yourself to.

"Can I get you anything? Water?"

You shake your head, swinging your legs over the side of the bed as you stand. Tangerine hands you his shirt he'd thrown beside the bed and you wrap it around yourself. "'M just gonna pee," you whisper.

You don't wait for an answer as you walk past him. You wander to the bathroom you'd seen in the hall. As you button up the shirt, you have a strange feeling someone is watching you so you look up.

You let out a sharp scream when you see Lemon standing in the hallway, clearly half-asleep. Hearing your scream he jumps and screams too and rubs his eyes.

You hear stumbling and then Tangerine, only wearing his boxers now, practically throws himself past the doorway. He slides next to you, pushing you behind him on instinct. He's on edge until he sees it's just his brother and his shoulders relax. You finish up the buttons of the shirt, your cheeks burning hot as you are unable to speak or ask the questions you so desperately want to ask. 

"Well, this is a lovely surprise," Lemon sighs, rubbing his eyes as he yawns. "Ya both know it's almost 5 am, yeah?"

"Yes, thank you," Tangerine retorts, his voice strained as he glares at Lemon, "You can go back to sleep now." 

Lemon smirks, his eyes locking with yours. "Hi, Angel," he waves with a smirk.

Embarrassment washes over you.

You like Lemon, you've always liked Lemon. He was one of your favorite bodyguards. He always made you and the other girls laugh when situations became tense. You had no clue he lived with Tangerine. 

"Piss off," Tangerine hisses in a whisper you can clearly hear and Lemon raises his hand in surrender, using the bathroom first. Once the door shuts, Tangerine turns to you and you look completely mortified. "Hey, it's okay, he's my brother," he explains. 

"Your brother?" you whisper back, a little frazzled now. 

Tangerine nods, his hand tucking a loose strand of hair behind your ear on instinct as he caresses your cheek. Thankfully, you don't flinch away from him as you're comforted by his touch. "Yeah, he's harmless."

You shake your head, moving past the brother's information to something more important. "Tan, he probably thinks you paid me! Oh god, this is horrible!" you whisper-shout, lowering your head in your hands. "He's gonna think I'm a whore and then he's gonna tell everyone at the club a-and–"

"Woah, darlin', shhh," Tangerine grips your shoulders, his voice still low so Lemon doesn't hear the conversation through the bathroom. "He definitely won't think that, okay? Trust me. And anyway, Lem isn't a gossip. He won't tell a soul."

"Ya, he's right, I ain't a snitch. My lips are sealed," Lemon interrupts, leaning against the bathroom door, zipping his mouth shut with an invisible zipper and Tangerine straightens up, turning back around to look at his brother.

Tangerine sends Lemon a don't scare her look and Lemon smirks. He looks at you and his gaze softens. "You better invite yer bird for breakfast, T." That is all Lemon says before he disappears back into his room down the hall.  

And so, an hour later, after neither you nor Tangerine could fall asleep, you're sitting at the small dining room table. Lemon is nursing a cup of warm tea while Tangerine butters up his toast. The air feels thick as you pick at the crumbs of your own, slightly burnt, toast, staring at the pink and yellow-checkered tablecloth on their living room table.

"It was our mums'," Lemon pipes up, watching you. "It's quite cheesy. Tangerine hates it." 

"I don't hate it. It was mums'," Tangerine interrupts, glaring at Lemon for a second but then his gaze returns to you and he clears his throat. You look up, smiling. Something in your chest flutters and you want to know more about them.

Lemon reads your mind. "Our foster mum was a gem," he says and looks at Tangerine and the latter nods, still quiet. He doesn't add on to the conversation and you don't want to pry. There is a sadness about Tangerine when Lemon speaks of their mum.

"My mum was a real piece of shit," you interrupt, unsure how to add to the conversation. You pause, chewing on the inside of your cheek for a moment. It probably wasn't the best segment considering both of them are looking at you with confusion. You take a mouthful of your toast, feeling a little embarrassed. 

"So, why'd you become a stripper?"

Tangerine frowns, jabbing his elbow into Lemon's side as he hisses; "What is wrong with you?!"

You laugh, shaking your head, "It's okay, it's just a question." You drop your toast, avoiding their gazes. "It was to save up money for uni, and now well, to keep up with the cost—" your laugh becomes dry, "and it's harder to leave this business than it is to start."

Tangerine is quiet and his stomach twists. He feels an immense guilt as you talk.

"What are you studying?" Lemon asks, beating his brother to the question. 

"Criminology," you say, sipping your drink, "I want to go into law."

Both Lemon and Tangerine sneak a glance you don't see and the conversation continues to flow. Lemon clears his throat and makes a joke while Tangerine remains quiet as he watches you finish your food. He likes watching you laugh with Lemon, he'll take any opportunity to see your smile.

He glances at the clock, secretly praying the hand stops so he can spend more time with you but once you see the time, you're excusing yourself. 

"At least let the bastard drive you home," Lemon eventually calls from the sink as he finishes the few dishes, and Tangerine hands you your jacket as you stand in the entrance. "Tis the least he can do after shagging you." 

"Lemon!" Tangerine hisses angrily.

"My mouth is shut, I remember!"

You laugh again, smiling at their banter. "I won't say no to that," you quip with a smile and Tangerine's shoulders relax.

Once you're both in his car again, he glances down and sees your panties on his gear shift. A deep blush settles on his cheeks. "You can keep them," you say nonchalantly, not seeming bothered by your missing undergarment "as a souvenir." You wink. You're clearly joking. 

Tangerine pauses, hesitating, and then takes the panties stuffs them in his pocket and clears his throat. 

"I didn't know you and Lemon were brothers," you say, looking out the window for a second before he starts the car, "You never talk at work."

Tangerine nods, keeping his eyes on the road. "We do, sometimes, but we mostly keep it hushed. It usually isn't good to mix family and business, but we make it work."

You nod, smiling. "I understand. I think it's wonderful how close you are."

"Thank you," Tangerine says and looks at you from the corner of his eye, smiling too. Without another word, you lean over and kiss him. It's quick, your lips gliding over his as your hand touches his cheek. Tangerine hums against the kiss as you pull away and his eyes open to look into yours. 

"Is this okay?" you ask softly. 

Tangerine's head screams at him that no, this is indeed not okay, that this is dangerous and you should be as far away from him as possible, but his heart yearns for you and for once in his life, he doesn't want to ignore his heart.

He nods, kissing you again as he leans his forehead on yours. "Yeah, this is okay. More than okay." 

You smile, squeezing his hand. You feel like nothing could ruin this moment.

Suddenly, Tangerine's phone rings in the center console and he picks it up. The caller ID reads Leo and his jaw tenses. You settle in your seat, looking at him curiously. "Who is it?" you ask innocently, catching on to Tangerine's sour expression. 

Tangerine turns off his phone and stuffs it in his pocket. 

"No one. No one you need to worry about," he says, focusing on the road as he starts the car.

You hum, not wanting to pry but you can't shake the weird feeling bubbles in your stomach.

[utilitycaster]

thank you so much for your analysis on BH, Ive been thinking for ages that they seemed like the wrong fit for this particular campaign and it's nice to see that I'm not alone. It kinda baffled me that even knowing the crux of the campaign was going to be about the fate of the gods, Matt didn't like... just tell the cast that their characters opinion on divinity would be important?

I really feel like this plot needed more religious characters, even if they weren't outright clerics or paladins. The only one filling that role is Sam and while I love him and FCG his approach to religion seems kinda... cynical? shallow? Possibly just more focused on the goofs of it all. Which is a fine choice in a vacuum but god, what I wouldn't do for this party to have a Caduceus or even a Vax figure so it didn't feel like a bunch of agnostics were deciding the fate of religion.

So here's my opinion, and I've said this before: I agree that making characters who had a coherent, developed opinion on divinity before the campaign that was discussed as part of the character build is important...but I actually don't think it matters if there's no clerics or paladins or even religious characters. I also said this before: my ultimate problem, in the end, is not just the indecision but the fact that they're not even exploring indecision; they just are drifting through a narrative from which they feel disconnected. I as a person viewing the show think killing the gods is a dumb idea, but a campaign in which the characters confidently embraced an anti-god position and took actions in the service of that goal would be infinitely more enjoyable. I do not need characters to live out my personal values, because I do that in my real life, in the same way that I can enjoy characters who are vastly different than I in personality.

I think Keyleth is a fantastic example of both indecision as an actual conscious character trait (during Campaign 1) and a character who is not religious or even particularly respects the gods but who seems to have actually thought through the implications and made an assessment. Keyleth's analysis paralysis and fear of making a harmful decision or being hurt is the point of the character, and Marisha explores it directly during Campaign 1; it is ultimately what is holding Keyleth back from becoming the leader she needs to be, and working through it is the arc of her character. Avoidance or indecision is a fantastic character flaw to explore (Bellara in Veilguard is a recent example that's been on my mind) but it is a character flaw to be explored, and for the character to do something interesting with, and Bells Hells just...as I've said, drift. They keep going through open doors because they are there and never say "do I even want to go through this door? Why or why not?" and the entire purpose of a character in fiction, in my opinion, is to ask that question.

I actually pretty strongly disagree about FCG. I think they took a bit longer than I'd like to click but I actually found FCG's exploration of religion to be one of the deeper ones in the series. I think the party often disparaged it, and the fandom certainly did ("Fearne should make that stupid robot eat his own coin" will remain burned in my brain forever; I cannot take someone who said that as anything but a shriveled husk of a person unless they admit it was horribly mean-spirited and they regret it) but FCG is the rare member of Bells Hells who actually explored the concept of having autonomy and agency - that was his entire arc, actually - and to have this be told through embracing the god of chance and freedom, whom he learned about by chance, was a highlight of the campaign. I would strongly advise you reconsider seeing this as nothing but a bit; just because Sam tends to make a lot of dumb jokes doesn't mean he's not often telling a pretty profound story underneath, and this is a lesson it took me until this campaign to learn, to be honest. But I will say I don't think FCG being here now would fix things any more than Braius does, in part because the rest of the party looked down on faith but also didn't really condemn it. They just made vaguely unkind comments and continued doing fuck all. As my ask earlier today said, they didn't actually challenge each other; they just sort of passive-aggressively bitch. The point that many people made very early on, that Bells Hells has a veneer of cooperation and civility but lack the actual true bonds that only arise through working through conflict, remains true.

Getting back to it, I think the fact that NPCs who are not affiliated with the Prime deities nor Betrayer Gods and even struggle against them (Percy, Keyleth; the entire Kryn Dynasty; a massive number of entirely secular governments including the Clovis Concord, the remnants of the Cerberus Assembly, as far as I know the Marquesian governments, the Silken Squall) are unambiguously against Ludinus and the release of Predathos means that it's not the lack of clerics or paladins or everyday religious people. I don't care if agnostics decide the fate of the world, but DAMN those agnostics better have a fucking vision for what the world should be. I could talk at length about why I think killing the gods is a deranged and unrealistic solution to the problems the characters claim to think it will fix, but ultimately I don't even feel like the characters care about those problems. The titans are still going to be fucking dead, conquest and colonialism already exist within Exandria without the aid of any gods. Hell, Ashton's whole situation could be replicated precisely again in a world with no gods; and as the Ruidusborn were created by Predathos as keys to release it, I don't think there's a reason to have any more but I don't think that's really what Imogen was going for. It's the same kind of thing we call rapture culture among terminally online types: the idea that with one big act of violence you will usher in a new, better age. The idea that violent change is inherently for the better is infantile and utterly self-centered, as is the idea that putting off a choice until it becomes inevitable is anything other than selfish and stupid. I would rather the choice of the fate of the gods come from atheists who weren't infantile and self-centered and selfish and stupid than clerics and paladins who were. That's it.

[fandom-go-round]

Hello! If you're still taking requests, I'd really appreciate it if you could please write some headcanons about Emmrich, Lucanis, Neve and Bellara dating a Rook who has pretty significant burn scars, particularly on their back, stomach, legs, arms, hands or feet. The scars are healed now, but they still consider them unsightly so they try to cover up as much as possible. I'd love to see your take on their reaction to Rook's scars being revealed to them for the first time.

Burn scars also come with a lot of complications like having to keep them out of sunlight, they often get pretty itchy and since skin regulates body temperature you can get cold super easily if you have significant burns. So if you want to include any of those factors feel free!

As someone who legit cannot be trusted around hot liquids and has scars from 2nd degree burns, I'd appreciate it, but if you don't want to write something like this I understand. Thank you, and I hope your day is going well!

Thank you so much for a Dragon Age request! I had a lot of fun with it!

Warnings: Burns, Talk of Burns, Previous Injuries, Implied Low Self Esteem, Implied Body Issues

Emmrich Volkarin:

As someone who usually wears layers when out and about, Emmrich doesn’t notice right away you’re covered almost always. He thinks of it as a personal style, at least until you’re exposed to the cold. It only takes one instance of fighting a desire demon and your hands to shake so bad you can’t hold your weapon for him to wonder. He won’t ask you of course, especially when Harding asks if you’re alright and you deflect.

The first time he sees your burns himself, Emmrich has a lot of thoughts. He can tell that you’re uncomfortable, not meeting his eyes as you continue to make dinner. It’s the first time he’s seen you in short sleeves and without gloves; you had thought you were alone at the Lighthouse. He wonders where you got the wounds and how but instead, he apologizes for starling you and asks if he can help. You agree to let him help and it takes almost a full hour for the tension to leave your shoulders. Emmrich is happy to wait as long as possible for you to trust him.

The longer the two of you are together, the more you open up about your scars. Emmrich is willing to listen to anything you say and go at your own pace. He’ll go out of his way to buy you embroidered gloves that you adore and has no issues steering the others away from the topic. He’ll hesitate to touch your scars because he doesn’t want to hurt you but once you assure he can touch, he loves kissing your everywhere. Scars are a part of you but they don’t define you.

Lucanis Dellamorte:

He’s one of the first companions to notice, mostly because he has some burns himself. Not as wide spread as yours but Crow training wasn’t kind to him and he sees the way you favor warm over cold and how your legs get itchy after being in Rivani. Lucanis makes sure to cook warm meals and uses ingredients that help with itchiness. He’s a silent supporter from the beginning.

The extent of your scars makes hm angry. He has no way of knowing (at first) where your scars come from and assumes them to be a battle gone wrong. Spite often speaks of hunting the people down who hurt you and he’s inclined to agree. If he finds out the burns are because of an accident he’s going to hover more. If you’re this accident prone he’ll be your silent shadow so you don’t get hurt again. Tell him off if he hovers too much; Lucanis will find something else to help with.

He has no issues touching your scars but will make sure you’re alright with it first. He never wants to make you uncomfortable and watches for your verbal and nonverbal ques. Lucanis will do whatever he can to help you feel better; putting on ointment, buying you new clothing, whatever you’d like. He won’t let anyone talk down to you. He’s protective on a good day and if someone tries to say anything about your scars? His knife is already at their throat.

Bellara Lutare:

Bellara doesn’t realize you have burn scars until you take your coat off, wet from being slammed into the lake. It took her and Davrin combined to pull you out and you’re swearing up a storm as you strip. Davrin just teases you about losing your footing before going to find firewood. Bellara doesn’t catch herself staring until you turn away and she busies getting the camping set out.

She doesn’t bring the scars up until the two of you are alone, checking in. Mostly she wants to make sure you’re not in pain and if you are, she can make burn cream. Someone in her clan had burns like yours that bothered them. You’re surprised by her practical offer and kiss her cheek, thankful for her support. You take her up on the offer, especially when you end up on the coast. The hot air makes you super itchy.

It becomes a habit for her to help you put the burn cream on your back since it’s hard for you to reach. It’s a soft moment inside the normal day to day chaos. Bellara loves that you trust her enough to let her do this and gets to touch you. Her face is red by the end and you tease her but its worth all the teasing to see the soft look in your eyes. Once of these days she’s going to get her nerve to kiss you, she promises!

Neve Gallus:

Neve figured you were using clothing to cover up something. Most people don’t wear as many layers as you and it a toss up between scars or you really are that much trouble. The truth is, as always, a little bit of both. You naturally run cold but it’s more than that. The first time she sees your scars, she’ll admit she wasn’t expecting them. She knows that jobs can go wrong, she just wishes you were luckier.

She won’t talk about the scars unless you bring them up. She understands how it feels for others to judge you based on old wounds; she’s almost punched people because of her leg. Neve does go out of her way to get you warm drinks to hold and buys you long pants as yours get ruined. The detective side of her wants to know how you got the scars but she does her damnedest to keep those thoughts to herself.

Neve can’t help but kiss the scars when she can, almost without thinking. Clothes on or off, she’ll kiss the palm of your hand or rub your shoulder. Let her know if the touching is too much and she’ll back off. She accepts every part of you, scared or not. She likes the flustered look on your face, it isn’t often she throws you off. Neve can and will use it to her advantage.

[teaguehq]

I'm glad you have more an appreciation for Calgary for staying here with me! And aside from the cold, I have to admit it's a nice city for all the fun things we've had the chance to see together. Seeing them with you makes them all the more fun, of course. That works out perfectly because I love attending your premieres and especially getting to see your projects on the big screen! I just know how much you put into your work, so it's no surprise it ends up being something special. People like a man in uniform for a reason, and I'm sure I'll be no different when I see Warfare, which you know I'm excited to see! I'm so happy you're not having to work either, and that I'm getting a little vacation for the holidays. It gave me the chance to finally drag you down to Florida with me, which I'm so happy you wanted to! Besides, we were due some warm weather after all that cold in Calgary and New York, don't you think? We can definitely think of a fun Halloween costume for next year, though closer to so we can match whichever ones are popular at the time if we'd like to. I'm sure it'll be just as fun dressing up with you again as it was this year! I appreciate that you'll always be understanding about distance when it comes to our relationship, and it certainly puts my mind at ease about ever losing you to that. Plus it means the world to me that we can celebrate our achievements together, including landing new roles! I can't help that being in your arms is so comforting, especially after a long day on set, so it's a good thing you don't mind the clinginess! You're already thinking up some new dates to plan? Because you know I'm interested in hearing those! And I may be planning something fun for Tampa while we're here, so it means a lot that you enjoy them. I think we both have a soft spot for the hot springs in Calgary, and no doubt we'll have to visit them again before my filming there is over. Recreating everything we've done there has been a lot of fun too, and you know I'm always up for that. I'm all for staying a little longer to take advantage of the hot springs since that seems like the perfect post-filming celebration. Not to mention I always love hot tubs with you, and loved them when we visited New York. I'm blushing a little at your saying you love me being all yours, and honestly, I like that too, along with you being all mine. If you love the way I look in your knitted items, just means you might have to knit more for me, don't you think? That feeling is so mutual, wanting to be near you, and it's impossible not to miss you when you're away. I'd wondered if Bach would be okay with traveling, so I'm just glad he's been such a good sport about it! And I'll still keep the secret about you liking my cuddles more than his and me liking your cuddles more, don't worry. It'll definitely be fun to meet up with Anya and Jamie in Paris to see the secret entrances to the Catacombs, and you know I'll always hold your hand through it all, too. I'd love to go back to that pub and see if it floods again, and if you'll have to carry me over your shoulder! I can't help blushing when you say things like I'm the sexiest, which it still feels a bit surreal that you think so. Though I'll always think you're more sexy, that's a given! Kissing you will always be the best way to start the day, and it's part of why I enjoy you being with me so much. We did an amazing job at breaking in your New York place, without a doubt, and I'm already looking forward to doing that all over again next time we're in the city. And my place too, since I know we have to break that in a little more. You're happy being where I am? That makes me happy to hear when it's so mutual, though I will say that I'm always willing to travel to London with you whenever you're missing it.

I'm so happy you enjoyed the bar with live music, since it's one of my favorite spots in New York! Dancing with you honestly just made it all the better. I'm all for taking more cooking classes too, because you're right, we need to learn more recipes to fill those books with! I'm happy you're as enthusiastic about that as I am, along with finding new meals we'll both enjoy. I'd been looking forward to the trip also, and we can go and meet Bentley tomorrow if you'd like! And you're thinking of giving the sanctuary a donation? You have such a kind heart, and I know they'd appreciate that a lot since like you said, they always need the funds to help out. I was happy you didn't mind meeting my parents, which I knew they'd like you! They'd been curious about you too, and I think they're relieved I'm with someone who's as amazing as you are. I understand being nervous since I'm nervous about meeting your family too, though I'm going to trust that they'll like me as much as you say. I'm excited to take you camping later in the week too, since I know a really great spot for it near a ranch where we can even see some cattle! I think that'll make it all the more fun. I'd love to visit those thermal pools in Turkey, especially since we already have a soft spot for those, and the surroundings are gorgeous. Having so many holidays planned suits me just fine too, when I'd love to see the world with you. And your spoiling me is honestly the best bonus, though you should expect some spoiling in return! Plus you're welcome to wake me up that way as many times as you'd like, given I enjoy it so much to start the day. Between that and our morning showers, I feel like I'm becoming more of a morning person, too. You don't have to be nervous about scaring me off, especially when I don't think that's possible. You…you love me? And think about all those things like living together and getting married? I can understand being nervous to say it when those are really big things to say, though I'm glad you did. I love you too, and I've known that for a little while - I think I kept quiet for the same reasons, not wanting to scare you and being a little afraid that it would. But I want you forever too, Joseph, and I can't ever see a time I don't, so it just makes me really happy we're on the same page, even if it's a little scary! But neither of us have to be scared when we're on the same page, right? You don't have to worry about me kissing you all the time, since I always will! Well, everyone was pretty amused by us when you made me run off set in the middle of a scene, though it's good to hear everyone's teasing you makes you feel at home! And that's good to know you'll always enjoy those kinds of favors, given they're a lot of fun with you and tend to linger in my mind, too. I always like having hot chocolate on the roof, and you being there and being in your arms just made it all the better, of course. I still smile so much thinking about that surprise in at your place and all the decorations, since you went all out for them, not to mention the red theme! We definitely had a perfect first Christmas together, and New Year's as well! I'm so happy you liked the gifts I gave you too, and we'll have to start mandolin lessons soon, don't you think? I couldn't resist getting you knitting supplies either, knowing hos much you like it! My gifts were so thought and lovely too, and I felt so spoiled! I know I'm never taking that necklace off, not to mention I'm excited about the cruise and planning that when we can! Bringing in the New Year kissing you in Times Square was incredible and I loved every moment. We'll have to go back to Devonian Gardens for another picnic before we leave Calgary too, don't you think? Which, I'm so happy you're not filming for a while and get to stay with me. I know we both need our parents, though it's nice we can take care of each other as well. Because that's mutual, that I'll always do whatever I can to make sure you feel happy and safe. | @josephafq

it's safe to say that you always make me feel amazing, love, and i can't help but feel amazing that i mean so much to you -- especially when you mean so much to me too. i've loved getting to stay with you while you've been filming too, and i'll admit that i've grown kind of fond of calgary! plus, it makes me feel good hearing that things are much better with me being there, i love that so much. i'll just say right now that you're the best date to have, and i love having you on my arm at premieres! though you're making me blush saying i do such amazing work, and it means the world that you think that, love. and it makes me feel good that you can't wait to see warfare as well, and i'm told i look pretty good in uniform, so you'll have some eye candy while watching as well! even though you know i love working, things feel so much better now that i'm not, and i can be with you all the time because i love being able to spend so much time with you. we'll have to think of a cute couple costume for next halloween, don't you think? and you know i'll never agree that i took the title sexy over you, love, though you're right that we both looked pretty amazing, and it was so much fun dressing up with you! again by making me blush, calling me extremely talented, and it feels so good hearing that you're proud of me, you know? you're right, even though we both hate the distance when we're apart, i know we'll both do everything in our power to make it work, and that's all that matters in the end. and it's safe to say when it comes to you -- i'll always be as understanding as i can be, yeah? and i love getting to celebrate with you when you land a new role because you're so talented, and i love when other people are getting to see that too! i'm very glad i don't have to worry about losing you, love, since i truly would be lost without you. and it feels good hearing that you'd never want to lose me either. i love that we're both clingy, it makes me smile when we want to hold onto each other so much. and it makes me feel good knowing that being in my arms is a cure-all for you because i love making you feel better, love, and love having you in my arms after you have a rough day on set. i love making you feel better. i'm so glad that you like the dates i plan, and i'm already thinking up some new dates to plan! it's also safe to say that i love when you plan dates too, love. and the one we had before we left for new york for christmas was amazing! you more than thanked me for always being here for you too, i loved it so much.  and you know i love staying at the hotel near the hot springs a whole lot already, and i just love being in the hot springs with you! so it makes me smile to hear you say it's one of your new favorite places, since i love going there with you just as much. and we're getting so good at recreating everything we've both been thinking about when we're there, yeah? you know i'm all for making the hot springs our last visit once you're done filming, love, and maybe we can stay there a little longer too. what do you think? oh, we always have so much fun in hot tubs when we have access to them, right? and i'm so thankful that my building in new york has a hot tub and pool, since we had so much fun using them. especially with the weather being as cold as it was in new york! and i know we'll be doing the same in calgary, since the weather is colder there! glad you think it's adorable that i want you in that state to be for my eyes only -- and it feels good hearing that you want to be the only one that sees me in that state as well. i just love you being all mine, you know? and don't want to share that sight with anyone!

i'm so glad that you love my knitted items, love, and i'll admit that it makes me smile when you wear them as well. and i love the way you look in them -- though it's safe to say i love the way you look in anything! i just always want to be near you, you know? so the moment we're apart, i can't help but miss you. and i'm glad that it's the same for you, love, and i love that you want to be so close to me all the time. i'm glad that you were happy bach has been traveling with us, he travels better than i thought he would, honestly. though i'm glad that you don't love his cuddles more than mine, of course, and we'll just have to keep it from him that you like mine better! i'm glad that i always have you to hold my hand when we go on a haunted adventure with jamie and anya -- and i'll have to let them know about us all meeting up in paris sometime! and from what they tell me, they know all the secret entrances, or are at least always finding some, so it should be fun. it makes me smile when you laugh about me carrying you at the pub, and i love the idea of you laughing if i tossed you over my shoulder to carry you next time, which means we need to go back to that pub so i can do just that, yeah? oh, i love the reaction of you blushing when i call you sexy, which is why i say it so often, but also because you're the sexiest. it makes me smile when you say that you think i'm the sexier of the two of us, even if i don't agree with that, love. i'm glad my kisses that i give you before you need to be on set help start your day so perfectly, especially when i love waking up and being able to kiss you. that's how i feel when we get to sleep in as well, very spoiled, i love getting to be wrapped around you for as long as possible. i'll admit it's fun silencing you with kisses, especially when you laugh a little whenever i do it! it's safe to say we did a very good job of breaking in my new york place for christmas and the new years, wouldn't you agree? and i loved that we got to spend at least one day at your place breaking it in a little, we'll spend more time there though, no doubt about that. it's funny, i'm still not missing london all that much -- though i have a feeling it more has to do with the fact that i'm with you than anything else, and you feel like home to me so i'm happy being wherever you are. it was fun going to a bar in new york that played live music, especially loved when you danced with me. we have to take some more cooking classes, yeah? because we need to fill those recipe books that you got me for christmas, love. and i can't wait to fill them with you, i can't wait to find new things to cook with you. i know i'm going to look forward to going to florida with you, love, and it'll be so much fun meeting bentley since you adore him so much! of course i understand missing you, you're very easy to miss, just saying. the sanctuary runs on donations, yeah? maybe i can give them a little something as well as help out. what do you think? i don't think it's too soon to meet your parents, love, because i really want you to meet my family too. especially when i talk about you so much to them and they can't help but be curious, you know? i'm a little nervous about meeting them, though, because i want them to like me, but can we make a plan to meet them soon? then after i meet your parents -- you can meet my family, who i just know are going to love you. i can't wait to camp with you in flordia, and just spend so much time on holiday with you when we've got the free time, love.

i had a feeling once you looked up the pamukkale thermal pools you would think they were gorgeous -- so i'm glad you're all for heading to turkey for those, and i know you'll love the hotel as well, love. and i'll just say that i love we've got so many holidays planned, you know? i'm going to spoil you so much on every one of them! i'm glad that you think i look so adorable when i blush, that makes me smile and just makes me love when you make me blush all the more. hey, i'll always wake you up that way if you'd like, love, since it's my favorite way to wake you up and all. and i'm glad it makes early mornings a whole lot more fun too, and of course i love our morning showers just as much! yeah? i'm glad to hear there isn't a time when you don't want me, since i spend every day and probably every minute wanting you. i do think about our future a lot, and i'll admit i'm a little nervous sharing some of the things i think about, mostly because i don't want to scare you off. though it makes it easier when you say it feels impossible to not see a future with me, so it makes me feel better about saying it all out loud. but..i think about us in the future settling down together. getting a house, getting married -- even maybe starting a family if that's what we both want. it's scary as hell saying all that out loud; i'm not going to lie, but i…love you and it feels good to lay my emotion cards on the table with you. and i really do want you for as long as i can have you, so please let it be forever, yeah? you're the most beautiful person i know, love, and i'm always going to say that. i love that picturing me pouting makes you want to kiss me, but i love even more being with you so you can kiss me all the time you'd like to, and please kiss me all the time! love, it's so cute that you had to promise him you wouldn't abandon a scene again when i showed up on set this time around. though i love that they tease me a little about it too, it makes me feel pretty welcome there! believe me, anytime you give me something like the favor you return, i'm going to think about it for a long time. it was really fun having hot chocolate on your rooftop that one night, plus i loved having you in my arms and just looking out over the city. i'm really glad that we ended up doing new york for christmas, my apartment ended up looking amazing thanks to the people i hired, and it was just the perfect first christmas with you! and i'm still not over the gifts that you got me, love, and i can't wait for you to give me mandolin lessons! plus the braclet and the beatles gift, which still makes me smile so much that you got me that, and the knitting stuff, i loved it all so much. and new years was great with you too, love, so glad you got to be my first kiss of the new year, and you know you're going to be my only kiss for the rest of the year too. it was fun bringing in 2025 with you though! i'm so glad you suggested devonian gardens for our indoor picnic. by the way, it was so gorgeous there, and the picnic was perfect. yeah? i love when you encourage me to touch you more, just saying. i'm happy to be with you too, my love, and i'm glad that i don't have to start filming for a while now so i can stay with you. and i know, baby, that's why i'm so glad to be with you now since the material is so dark, and i'm glad that i can bring you some comfort when you're dealing with some rough things. and i'm so glad you had your parents for thanksgiving, it makes me smile that seeing them helped, but i get it because after filming warfare, i needed my mum and dad too. i'll also always take care of you, okay? never doubt that -- anytime you need me, i'll gladly be here and do whatever i can to make you feel better. || @teaguehq

[mythicmanuscripts]

I want to overstimulate aegon !

You and me both anon!! You and me both.

I've definitely written about overstimulating Aegon before because I don't think it's possible to write NSFW Aegon without it. Thinking about how obvious it is that Aegon would love that made me think about how most of the castle would be at least a little aware that you dom Aegon and that without you doing that he turns into a little terror no one can handle.

So that's what you'll find below the cut! I hope that's alright with you anon. If you or anyone else wants a more in-depth response about overstim then feel free to request it again and just made sure to add some form of detail about it so that I'm not just rewriting my overstimulating thoughts again. Enjoy!

Before you came along Aegon was definitely known for being willing to fuck and get fucked by just about anyone. He could have single handedly kept king's Landing's brothels open.

Aegon liked you from the moment he met you. Even though it was an arranged marriage and done for political power, he would still much rather have married you than any of the other possible spouses he could have chosen from. You were the only one who seemed to have a sense of humour, the only one who could joke with him and clearly wasnt afraid of him. He loved that from your very first conversation with him.

Once you're married, you and him both know your duties. You and him are to produce a few heirs, enough that there will definitely be someone to take over the iron throne even with a few deaths and then after that you could both sleep with whoever you wanted and you hardly had to even see each other after that.

You were prepared to do that, but you had promised yourself that you would not take it laying down (literally). You refused to allow it to be 10 minutes of boring fucking where you just wait til he's finished and then he leaves. Absolutely not. You were going to get some enjoyment out of this.

Aegon also expects for it to be like that, until you walk into your new shared chambers and push him up against the wall. And well... he is most certainly not complaining. You expect some resistance from him but nothing even close to that happens. You take control and he just becomes to pliant?

You have absolutely no idea where the man you had heard so many bad things about was. You had heard so much about his selfishness and desire and how rough he would make it, but you see absolutely none of that. From the moment you had him against the wall he was yours to play with.

You swear he was made for this purpose. There's no other explanation for it. He begs so quickly and so easily, wanting so badly to be good for you.

So of course you have your fun, and you very quickly discover how pretty he looks when he cries after his third orgasm. Poor little thing can't even get his legs to stop shaking.

And when you finished and you got into bed to let him cuddle into you? Well now you're it for him. He got completely wrecked AND he also got cuddles? Yeah no one else will ever be accepted again.

The entire castle is in shock for the next few weeks because Aegon doesn't leave for a brothel once? In fact he sent letters to three brothels informing them that he would no longer need his weekly booked room.

Things start to make a little more sense when they start to see you two together more often. Aegon looks at you like you hung the moon and all the stars. He's always holding your hand, always looking for you, always making sure there's space beside him for you.

It's very clear that you have a grounding effect on him, but what people don't know is how much of that effect comes from you absolutely wrecking him at least once a week.

You always know you've got to make time for that soon when he starts to get even whinier than usual (yes, it's actually possible) and he may genuinely cry if you have to go somewhere alone. Even when he is with you he's alls squirmy and unsettled, constantly moving around and snapping at anyone else who tries to get his attention.

You sort that out by getting an evening free of obligations and taking control the moment you're alone with him. Aegon needs to be pushed to his limits, needs to cum so many times he can barely even think never mind string a sentence together.

(You always start by letting him get you off, because you've learnt the hard way that if he realises at the end of a scene that you havent cum he will go straight into subdrop and feel like a failure.)

After that his favourite is when you sit next to him and drape his leg over your thigh to get full access. He whines and cries against your shoulder, mumbling broken pleas and cumming all over your hand every time you tell him to. He always cleans it up though!!! He'll lick your hand hand clean and then if you don't move your arm quick enough he will take your fingers into your mouth and then you're in trouble because if you pull away without giving him something else to suck on then he will just start crying. Poor thing is too fucked out you must help him!!

You spend the entire night and most of the next morning in bed with him after that. When he does emerge he's always in a much, much better mood and actually does all the things he's supposed to do.

[the-universal-sun]

Hii, I've been reading a lot of you're writing andi love them so much!!! If you feel comfortable enough and only if you want to do you think you could do a sick agere? I forgot if you already done one so if you did you can just ignore this, but if not then can you do one where stan or Ford gets sick while out on the Stan O war and regress from it, thank you, again you don't have to do it or anything thank you!!!

Thank you so much! And of course I'd do it, it was they were both such lovely prompts! I hope you're still here, both of you. Sorry it took so long, and sorry it's been so long since I posted last, I've not been feeling super good myself these past few days. But! I'm feeling loads better now, maybe some rest does do one good! I hope your stomach ache feels better, those are the absolute pits, and I'm sorry you got one.

I have Ford use "stummy" here because I have a tendency to say that so I wanted him to as well. How do we feel about that word/smaller and babier words in general, yay or nay?

I hope you all stay safe out there and in this weather, drink warm and eat warm and bundle up in you need to! Thank you for reading, I hope you enjoy!

As always, I welcome any helpful comments and criticisms on my writings.

Thank you for being here!

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"Mmmmmmmh. Buddy!" Ford whined, curled up in Stanley's bed, one hand clutching his stomach and the other his head. He felt terrible. Worse than terrible. He felt awful. His stummy felt like it was rolling down hill, queasy and with sharp pains panging around periodically. His head felt too big, like his brain was going to burst out from all the pressure he felt. And he wanted to sleep, but he couldn't because everything hurt. He hated it. He hated being sick. It wasn't even his fault! Not really, he just got excited about seeing a Kraken that he stayed out in the rain longer than he should have. Stanley can't blame him for being curious, now can he? Not when he's the one encouraging him.

Ford sneezed, his stomach and head rocking. He should have listed to his brother. He sniffled, both from being sick and from holding back his tears. He wanted Stan, his Buddy. He also wanted Dr. Mittens, but he can't until his friend is properly suited up in scrubs and a mask, Ford didn't want Dr. Mittens to get sick like him. That's where Stan was, but he was taking too long, he looked at the clock on the side table. Five whole minutes!? They both should have been here four minutes ago. He opened his mouth to croak for Stan again before he appears right in front of him, slipping on his glasses. When did those get taken off?

"Hold your horses there, Poindexter, I'm here and I've got your little friend. Don't worry, he's all trussed up in that Doctor gear you made us get for him." Stan handed Dr. Mittens, all suited up and ready to safely cuddle Ford through his sickness, to him. He snatched him up, curling his body around his plush friend as his head pounds and pounds. He wants to cry, he thinks to himself, whining against his toy, he hates this so badly. Ford didn't realize he was crying until a tissue is wiping his face dry and Stan is helping him sit up.

"Noooo, don't wan'na get up," He whined through tears, hiccupping and trying to lay back down. Can't Stanley see he's sick?

"Shhh, I know. You want to lay down, I get it, trust me, Buddy, I do. But if you want to feel better, you have to take-take this, uh," Stan hesitated, staring at the warm tea that has a dose of dissolvable Tylenol in it. He hated even talking about medicine, but he has to, he has to take care of Ford. "This tea has some medicine in it-"

"Ugh, icky." a whine interrupted him. And yeah, Stan silently agreed, icky is right.

"No, not icky, Stanford, medicine to help your head feel better. Relieve your sinuct pressure or whatever it's called." Stanley propped Ford up against him. Ford made a face at the word medicine, he hated the taste and feeling of medicine, it made his throat feel icky and greasy, and it tasted to awful. "Listen, it's one o' those sweet berry teas, with some honey, so it should taste sweet enough for you taste buds." Well, Ford thought, honey is good for fighting on the inside germs that make people sick, and he does like fruit teas, so maybe if he can't taste the medicine, it will be fine. But, he clutches his stummy again as pain burst through it, there's one issue.

"Buddy, my stummy hurts, don' know, know if, the tea-" Ford hurt too much to form sentences, whining crying as his head and stummy feel even worse. He hated this. He hates it, he hates it, he hates it. He could feel himself cry, his face felt hot and his head hurt even worse! He just wants to sleep.

"Hey now, Buddy, I'm here, good ol' Stan's right here. Come on, shhh," Stan gathered Ford close and rocked him, one hand rubbing his stomach as he spoke lowly in his brothers ear. It seemed feeling small made Ford unable to hide how out of it and cruddy being sick made him. Stan hated it, how much pain his brother showed he was in, his tears, his sick whines. But on the other hand, Stan could finally take proper care of a sick Ford. Win some, lose some in his opinion. The ends outweigh the means blah blah blah. He was just glad his brother was more receptive and demanding when he's sick and Little, his brother never usually let him take care of him out of some guilt-ridden mentality about being the one to erase Stan's mind. Which is undeserved guilt, but they're working on it. For right now, he just wanted to keep his Little Buddy from crying and get some-ugh-medicine in his to soothe his pains. "Your stummy hurts? Probably from eating a whole bag of jelly beans before bed, right?" He didn't wait for a response, he didn't want to tease his brother too badly when he's regressed, he can't always understand teasing and jokes then. "It's okay, this tea is going to help your head and stummy, and you might even get a nap out of it!" Stan released a strained chuckle, still rubbing Ford's aching stomach, hoping it really did ease his pains. Just because he could better help his brother didn't mean he liked seeing him like this.

Ford felt the cup against his lips and opened them, slowly sipping the tea. It wasn't icky, it didn't taste the best, but if it helped him stop hurting and can make him sleep, then he'd drink. He felt Stan wipe his tears away again as he took small sips out of the plastic cup-it was his special moth cup-slowly so he didn't spill anything. Once finished, he's laid back down in bed, Stan had taken his glasses so he didn't squish them. He felt sort of better, maybe? His head didn't hurt as bad and his stummy didn't feel like it was tumbling down a hill, more like rolling down one. It was an approvement, more so when a hot cloth was put on his face right over his eyes and forehead. Ford sighed and settled further into Stan's bed as the blankets were tucked tightly around him and Dr. Mittens and his weighted one with all the constellations was tucked in over all the rest. Ford felt so comfy and cozy and warm.

"Buddy, I, mmmmmy head doesn't hurt..."Ford trailed off into mumbles. Huh, the tea must be working already, Ford felt so tired, but his stummy and head didn't hurt anymore, so he could actually get asleep now. No, to sleep, he could get to sleep. He couldn't keep his eyes open, one slowly closing, then the other. Ford mumbled more and leaned his head slightly into his brother's hand, the one that swept through his hair. When did that happen? Ford couldn't be bothered to think about that, not when he was so warm and cozy with the Best Brother and Buddy in the world beside him and taking care of him and petting his hair.

The rocking of their boat lulled Ford further into sleep, his stomach settled, his head cleared, and his brother and best friend right beside him.

[lovelyjuju]

Could I request just a CRUMB of Nicholas fluff (or otherwise 🤭🤭) headcanons ? (Pls pls pls pls pls pls pls your other hcs are so amazing)

nicholas hcs i was waiting for this moment 😈

(also thank you pookie, this means the world ily!)

warning: just a tiny bit suggestive

︶⊹︶︶୨୧︶︶⊹︶

nicholas who you met in one of your dance classes two years ago. his intimidating gaze always made you hesitate to approach him, but when you accidentally left your water bottle in the practice room once, he was quick to grab it and jog through half of the building just to give it back.

nicholas who shrugged the action off with his usual nonchalance at first, but couldn't help the little smile tugging at his lips when you didn't stop thanking him.

nicholas who you somehow bonded with, even if it was only for this one moment – but ever since then, you started talking more often whenever you had classes together.

nicholas who's not that much of a close friend but somehow he's close enough to talk to you, although he barely opens his mouth when it comes to other people.

nicholas who always wears that nonchalant, blank expression, his eyes practically piercing through the people he looks at – but for some reason, they start to soften just a little whenever his gaze lands on you.

nicholas who you see smiling only every now and then, but when you do, it's like he lights up the entire room.

nicholas who usually gets just a little annoyed by people as bubbly as you – but with you, he has to physically hold back from smiling.

nicholas who's usually the first to get in trouble, not for really bad things though. it's mostly him being late to class (cause let's be real, he just loves to sleep) or forgetting assignments.

nicholas who grants you just the hint of a smile when he shows up to class late again, walking right in on you trying to make up an excuse for him in front of your teacher.

nicholas who, after class, approaches your desk, sheepishly running his hand through his black, silky hair. "thank you for standing up for me," he says, one corner of his lip curling up into a lopsided smile. "you know... if you ever need something, hit me up," he adds, staying for just another second before turning his back and walking off.

nicholas who blinks at you in surprise when you actually ask him for help a few weeks later. he can't believe you're opening up to him about how you've been struggling with practice for a while now.

nicholas who listens attentively to your ramble about how you `just can't get some moves right' and feel 'completely stuck', still wondering why you ask him out of all people. sure, he knows he owes you, but he also knows he's by far not the best in class (or maybe he's just too self-critical).

nicholas who lets his thoughts wander just for a second, thinking you might have asked him cause you thought he was skilled, or maybe he was even somewhat special to you.

nicholas who panics at the thought, suddenly not knowing how to say yes and instead letting the words "why are you asking me?" slip.

nicholas who watches your eyebrows furrow when you reply, "i mean... if you don't want to, i can ask yudai. sorry for bothering."

nicholas who doesn't know if it's the possibility of him upsetting you or you asking yudai for help that immediately makes him change his mind (if he thinks about it a little longer, it's probably the second). he agrees to help, not only because he owes you but because the idea of you spending extra time with yudai makes his jaw tighten.

nicholas who, if he's honest, even hates the thought of you practicing with yudai instead of him. he hates only seeing you so much as chat with yudai during the breaks and how comfortable you seem around him. he doesn't really understand why it bothers him though – you're not even that close to yudai.

nicholas who stands behind you as you show him what you're struggling with. he keeps an appropriate distance between the two of you, standing just close enough for you to catch a hint of his cologne.

nicholas who tries to focus on critiquing your posture, but your movements and your concentrated expression (that he finds very cute) draw his attention. suddenly, the only thing he hears is the pounding of his own heartbeat.

nicholas who snaps out of his trance when you turn around to face him with a pout on your face. "you're not paying attention," you sulk.

nicholas who quickly makes up an excuse. after that, he watches your every move through the mirror, his voice low as he kindly points out what you're doing wrong.

nicholas who, when he helps you correct your movements, notices how his breath catches when your fingers accidentally brush his. he clears his throat, stepping back abruptly, but the way the tips of his ears turn just slightly red doesn't go unnoticed by you.

nicholas who can't fight back his smile when you try again and immediately show improvement. he nods approvingly before stepping closer again, his breath warm against your ear as he explains, "you're just a little stiff now, relax." his hands ghost over your shoulders and then down to your hips – barely even touching you but still sending a shiver down your spine.

nicholas whose fingers graze your waist as guides you through the movement again. his touch is soft and innocent, but enough to make your breath hitch (and definitely enough to make it hard to focus on anything but him).

nicholas who notices the catch in your breath and has to fight the urge to pull his hand bank. instead, he stays close, letting his hand rest on your waist to steady you as you go through the movement for the nth time.

nicholas who, as you continue practicing without his guidance, becomes more aware of every small detail; the way you bite your lip when concentrating, the little, frustrated huff when you mess up, even the way your hair falls over your shoulders and brushes against your neck.

nicholas who begins to feel increasingly distracted. he knows he's supposed to be helping, but something about you just makes his thoughts stray.

nicholas who notices how your eyes linger on him through the mirror – how you peak at him when you think he isn't looking. he catches it once, but he doesn't say anything.

nicholas who waits for you to pack your bag after practicing, leaning against the mirror with his arms crossed. you turn to thank him again, voice warm and genuine, but he just shrugs it off (although something about the way you speak to him so softly makes him look at you longer than he intended).

nicholas who mutters "see, you didn't need yudai to help you." he immediately looks away after saying it, annoyed at himself for letting his words slip.

nicholas whose ears turn red again when you laugh softly and call him out with a teasing, "what's that supposed to mean?"

nicholas who ignored your question and pretends to adjust the strap of his bag instead, before walking you to the door. he looks down to you, shoving his hands deep into the pockets of his sweatpants when you ask how to thank him for helping you.

nicholas who replies, "you don't have to. we're even now," trying his hardest to sound as casual as possible, but the moment he sees the slightest flicker of disappointment on your face, he hesitates.

nicholas who, after a second of silence, tilts his head slightly, a small but sheepish smile tugging at the corner of his lips. "but if you insist..." he starts, taking a step closer. his eyes flicker down to your lips and then back to yours as he leans in just a tiny bit. "how about a kiss?" he asks softly.

nicholas who watches you carefully as you freeze and search his face for any sign that he's joking. he's unsure if he took it too far, about to take back what he said, when you step closer. you take a deep, shaky breath as your pulse is pounding in your ears before almost whispering, "if that's what you want..."

now it's nicholas who freezes for just a second. you tilt your head up, your lips brushing his softly. he leans into the kiss, his hand coming up to gently cup your face.

nicholas who feels his heart beating faster than ever before, the feeling of your lips so softly against his sending a jolt through him.

nicholas whose other hand finds your waist, pulling you a little closer while he bends down a bit more.

nicholas who takes a step forward and gently pushes your back against the door frame, his hand finding its way from your cheek to your neck to pull you impossibly closer as he tentatively lets his tongue glide over your bottom lip.

nicholas who's so unbelievably happy he finally gets to kiss you, finally gets to convey all the emotions he doesn't know how to express with words. <3

© lovelyjuju (2025)

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[the-morningstar-family]

Considering your... unique situation it might make sense to start a list with names that are an absolute no-go?

Michael, Gabriel, Raphael, probably also no Sara, Adam, any variation of the name Lilly might be confusing and the name of Alastor's "father is also out.

If you don't like Jacob that's probably also a no for Josef, Mary and David.

There are damn many names with heavy bible associations and that's not touching the popes.

So yeah. No Go list might be necessary.

And also, remember to ask Willa what names are burned in their family, you don't want to accidentally trigger any unknown trauma for Felix.

Aaaand it might be worth to check the Goetias names? Probably going to suck for your poor babies if they have one of their more annoying members as a namesake.

Damn, naming royal babies is hard. How did you settle on Charlotte?

Alastor: "Well, the process of elimination works too, just takes longer..."

Lucifer: "A list isn't a bad idea though. It does eliminate quite a few names. Like they said"

Alastor: "How many names can we cross off with the ars goetia?"

Lucifer: "Uhh, wait I have a list!"

The king rummages through some letters, until he holds a slightly glowing scroll. The demon reads it in consideration.

Alastor: "That are 72 names out of the running"

Lucifer: "74, Stolas' wife and their daughter aren't on the list."

Alastor: "And what are their names?"

Lucifer: "Uhhhhh...."

Alastor: "How do you not know this?"

Lucifer, embarrassed: "I haven't been too involved recently..."

Alastor: "Then we should figure that out"

Lucifer: "On it!"

While he types away in his phone- because didn't Ozzie say something about Stolas one time?- Alastor thinks about the other suggestions.

Alastor: "There isn't much to consider on Willa's and Felix' side of the family. Only "April", it was her mother's name. But April didn't have any family besides her daughter. Much like Willa and Felix now."

Lucifer: "Stella and Octavia!"

Alastor, confused: "Mh?"

Lucifer: "The missing names- Apparently Stolas and Stella are divorced now? And uh- their daughter is named Octavia"

Alastor: "Hm. This gives us at least a good idea on what not to choose."

The radio demon starts to copy the goetia names. Then some variations of their own names, the archangel's, his father's name (with a good bit of force), names they already disagreed upon, April, biblical names and variations of Lilly, like suggested. Then, with a smirk, he adds Fluffy.

Lucifer: "Fuck you. I was running out of ideas"

Alastor: "The name speaks for itself, darling. No need to clarify."

He only gets a middle finger in response. Which makes the demon giggle. After he sobered up, he does consider the last question.

Alastor: "How did you agree upon 'Charlotte'? It's a good question"

Lucifer: "Oh hell, we never settled on a name. We fought about it all the time, actually. Until she was born. Somehow we just thought Charlotte, and Charlie, suited her. Aw, just looking at that cute widdle face"

Alastor softens as the angel recounts the memory. Suddenly feeling slightly more confident about finding suiting names.

Alastor: "Perhaps that is not a bad idea"

Lucifer : "Mh? What is?"

Alastor: "We simply wait for them to make their appearance. And along the way we can add names to the name list we dislike."

Lucifer: "... And if we can't find the right ones in time?"

Alastor: "I am sure we can find something we can settle on"

Lucifer: "Well okay - let's do that"

Alastor, smirking: "We can be more creative than doctor Chaim at the very least. Although, Babies A, B and C does have a theme to it."

Lucifer, laughing: "Behold hell! The alphabet!"

A bit of nauseating feeling settles in Alastor's stomach, but not enough to make him go to the toilet. The demon mumbles under his breath.

Alastor: "We are simply joking, darlings"

[goingtojohnkramershouseee]

could u do a fluff fic with either matt or chris where they see best friend!reader is drunk at a party (maybe she’s overly flirty and clingy) and they take her home, it’s one if my favorite tropes

Thanks so much for the recommendation I absolutely love this idea!! Also, this is my first time writing fluff and only my second time ever writing so please let me know what I can improve on:) love you allll :D

warnings!!! drunk!reader, comforting!matt, mentions of alcohol, mentions of w33d, mentions of vomit.

It was a Friday night, you were drunk, stoned, and felt like you were floating on a cloud. You were out with your two best friend's matt and Chris, trying to get them out of the house to live a little. Matt and Chris watch as you flirt with a guy who's getting a little to touchy. "I don't like that guy y/n is talking to, he gives me weird vibes". Matt said to Chris while leaning on a counter sipping his root beer, carefully examining the way the guy touched your shiny skin and the way you absolutely loved it.

"Hm, I think She's good, she knows how to handle herself". Matt did not like the way Chris was handling this; he puts down his cup and starts to walk over to you. "Yo matt she's g-" matts already gone by the time Chris gets to finish his sentence. "Hey y/n its getting late we should y'know head out." You look at matt with puppy dog eyes as the guy y/n is talking to steps closer to matt. "Hm and uh who are you?" Matt looks at the tall blonde-haired man and says, "I'm her brother and she needs to get home Shes got finals tomorrow and actually should be studying right now". Matt lied he didn't want this guy to fuck with you and a little white lie didn't hurt anyone. "What no I don-", matt grabbed your wrist, “say goodbye to your friend y/n”matt said looking at Chris as he started to make his way over to see how he was handling this.

Y/n says goodbye and soon walks out of the party with matt and Chris by her sides "why did you say that matt, I was having a good ti-" you cut yourself off with vomit falling out of your mouth the second matt opens the car door for you. '"Oh shit, you good?", matt looks over at Chris judging him by what he just said "Stfu Chris n' get in the car". Matt pulls your hair out of the way and holds it back as you throw up in the ditch Infront of his car. “You got it, you're okay sweetheart”, Matt Coes as he rubs your back trying to let you know he’s there for you. “I’m so sorry Matt, I-I didn’t mean too”. “Shhhh, it’s okay you didn’t do anything wrong let’s get you home". Matt puts you in the front seat of his car while Chris sits in the back slowly falling asleep.

They soon get back your home, and Matt gets out the Car to open your door. You were asleep, Matt trying not to wake you carefully picked you up and brought you inside. You slowly shift in matts arms as he makes his way to your bedroom. You let out an aggravative groan as matt sets you down on your bed carefully taking off your heels. "ughm, matt m'tired" you whine out as matt looks up at you and speaks, "It'll only be a little longer than you can go to bed". He soon gets both your heels off. "Do you wanna sleep in your dress or are you gonna change." "Can you just take my dress off and get me a hoodie or something."

Matt nods and makes his way over to your closet and grabs the first hoodie he saw and made his way back over to you. He carefully took off your dress trying to not make you uncomfortable or feel awkward. He soon puts the hoodie on you. Before matt could say anything, you were already asleep and snoring. He lets out a small laugh and kisses your forehead right before he left your room." She good?" Chris asks once matt gets back to the car. "Yeah, she should be fine until she wakes up tomorrow and she's hungover". They both share an exchange laugh and then make their way home.

an: Omg I'm so so sorry this took so long for it to not even be good. But please let me know what you guys want me to do next and if there is anything I can improve on!!! LUV U ALLLLL:D

[benchwarming]

i meant to reflect a bit before the end of 2024 about the experience of quitting my job last summer, but then my holidays were disrupted by norovirus AND conjunctivitis 🤪 so i didn't get around to it. until now!

i quit my job in august. i'd been at a startup for 6.5 years and had no plans to leave, buuuut then we were acquired in '23 by a big multinational firm. i won't get into all the ways that our new parent company eroded what had been to that point a pretty good place for me to work, but man, it fuckin sucked.

i was admittedly sensitive to it because "toxic legacy corporation led by sociopaths and staffed by mediocre assholes" was exactly the environment i was escaping when i'd joined the startup. but having to kowtow to a new c-suite of boomer-brained idiots with no sense, strategy, or discipline at a company i never wanted to work for in the first place was excruciating. especially bc i then had to turn around and try to make the best of their idiocy for a team of people* looking to me for reassurance and motivation.

i've never quit a job without having my next one lined up. it took like a month to admit to myself i was serious about the idea. then another month to be convinced by friends and fam that i was allowed to quit. then a few business days to calculate how long my finances would hold up. then another month to figure out what would have to happen for me to actually go through with it.

but of course something did happen, and i did quit. it was very scary!!! and i felt so guilty leaving my team. but i was able to kick off some freelance copywriting work right away, and a freelance consulting project came my way after that, and more things popped up after that. and while i have a lot to learn yet about how to make freelancing a sustainable long-term career, i'm extremely confident that it's worth it to try, at least for a while, bc uhhhh i am. SO much happier?!

i don't think it hit me exactly how much work i was doing, or how hard i was pushing myself to stay on top of it all, until i didn't have to do it anymore. i'm still getting used to that honestly. for the first few weeks i'd jolt awake worrying i'd forgotten something on my to-do list or automatically pull up zoom bc i felt sure i had a meeting to attend.

in comparison to that garbage, freelancing has been easy breezy. but i don't mean easy like mindless, i just mean like - i'm able to dictate the terms and scope of the work, and as a result it doesn't feel like "stuff i have to do" so much as "stuff i'm working on." that may be a distinction without a difference for a lot of people but it's turned out to be a pretty big deal for me: if i gotta work to live (and right now i do), then getting to call the shots and fully own the results makes it easier to conceptualize the work as an opportunity (fun! interesting! good use of time!) rather than an obligation (annoying! inflexible! standing between me and fun stuff!). and after years of managing a team it's such a relief to be responsible only for myself again.

of course the other thing i had at that job was a good salary. and i won't lie, i really miss the money. but i think i can get my income back up in that ballpark by the end of 2025 if i play my cards right. and even if i don't, i know now that enduring corporate agonies for that kind of money is no longer a worthwhile tradeoff for me.

since quitting there have been moments where i've felt dumb for not realizing sooner that freelance would be a better fit at this point in my professional life than a staff job. but i went into 2024 knowing i needed to take some kind of step forward in my career, and i did, and i learned stuff about myself in the process, and now i hate being alive at least 25% less per day than i used to. and that's sort of the whole point of everything, right?**

*by december, 80% of our department would be laid off, and the few left over would be desperate to leave. a really unfortunate end to an incredible marketing organization.

**of course now my therapist is like "so since 2023 was your Living Situation year, and 2024 was your Career year, does that mean 2025 is going to be your Relationship year?" and ughghghfhfhgf. like she's right, but. ugh. but she's right! but UGHHH

[whoops-all-jennas]

Past Lives pt. 7

Wednesday x witch!reader

"I've got this strangest feeling."

"This isn't our first time around."

Summary: You and Wednesday investigate Xavier before attending the Rave'n

I wake up to the sound of papers rustling and Wednesday thinking out loud to herself. The morning sun beaming through the windows making me never want to open my eyes.

I dramatically sit up, my white hair going every which way. I feel I have more energy than usual, maybe I needed that release of energy.

My feet find their way into the slippers by my bed, I'm wearing pajama shorts and an oversized band tee. The shirt has clearly seen better days as the graphic is faded.

I walk to the center of the room to find Wednesday in front of a bulletin board, crossing her arms in thought. The bulletin board is covered in pictures of wounds and bodies. I assume these are all the victims of the murders, Wednesday did say she snuck out last night to the morgue.

I turn around to find Enid sleeping still, so I keep in mind of my volume. "Good morning Wends, did you sleep or?"

Wednesday turns around to meet me, her eyes going to my white messy hair. "I can see you did." She responded in a whisper, unsure if it's because Enid is sleeping is because she's just naturally mimicking my volume.

Her eyes linger on my hair a moment longer before turning back around.

"Are you the one who set the statue on fire?" I ask in a whisper.

Wednesday moves a picture before pushing a thumbtack through it. "I thought you did. When I looked at you it was as if you were concentrating on the fire."

I at least know it wasn't Wednesday. "I think I did?"

Wednesday turns around again. "You think?"

"I kinda zoned out, but it felt like all the emotions of yesterday just kinda like, alleviated in that moment."

I find Wednesday's new soft gaze meeting mine. Ever since that vision yesterday she's been looking at me differently. A good different.

"Why did you play a song while the fire was going on?"

Wednesday stares off to the side before meeting my gaze again. "I wasn't sure what was happening and if you were involved or not. Besides, I can handle people being suspicious of me."

Wednesday turned back around, bringing her attention back to the bulletin board.

Was she trying to be a distraction for me?

"I'm gonna get ready, we can talk about whatever you uncovered from the morgue when I'm done." She stopped moving while I was talking before going back to what she was doing.

That's about as much of an acknowledgement I'm going to get from Wednesday with a statement like that. I head back to my section of the room to get ready.

"While most plants reward their pollinators with sweet nectar, many carnivorous varieties turn to sexual trickery or deception." Ms. Thornhill is holding up a dangerous looking plant casually while addressing the class.

I glance at Wednesday, noticing Xavier staring at me before we both look away from each other.

Ms. Thornhill keeps teaching the class, but none of it retains in my memory over Xavier and I's occasionally glances at each other from across the sunlit room.

"Now, once the plant is pollinated, what do the male insects get in exchange?" Ms. Thornhill looks to me, about to call on me to answer after noticing my lack of attention.

"Nada. Just like all the guys at the Rave'n." Bianca answers before Ms. Thornhill embarrasses me. Some light chuckles fill the classroom.

"Okay, okay. I know you're all excited about Saturday, which is why I haven't assigned any homework." Ms. Thornhill states, causing a majority of the class to cheer quietly.

"But I do still need volunteers for the decorating committee. Anyone interested, come and see me up here." Some students stand to approach the teacher's desk, while Wednesday and I stay in place.

"What? you don't want to volunteer?" I say jokingly.

"I hope that isn't your best attempt at a joke." Wednesday glares at me for a moment, causing me to look away to see Xavier's glance on me.

"I feel bad, about what I said yesterday to Xavier." I say with a worried look on my face. "Maybe I overreacted."

Wednesday turns to see Xavier bending over to put something in his bag that's on the floor, revealing the fresh wounds on his neck.

"Maybe we can kill two birds with one stone." Wednesday states, turning back to me. "We can follow him until I notice something that can potentially give us a lead."

"Do you suspect Xavier?" I ask in a worried whisper.

"Only by proximity, nothing certain. Yet." Wednesday turns to look at Xavier again. "But, a suspect is still a suspect."

Wednesday and I find ourselves near a shed by the school. Xavier leaves the shed shortly after we arrive. We're hiding behind a bush so he can't see us.

"Cast the spell." Wednesday demands. I take out my wand, casting the disillusionment charm on her so she can sneak into the shed with ease.

"We'll meet back here afterwards so I can remove the charm." I don't hear a response, but I assume she nodded.

I stand, doing a light run to catch up to him. "Xavier!"

He turns around to meet me. "Hey y/n, what's up." He's clearly acting like nothing is wrong.

"I just wanted to apologize about how I acted yesterday, I shouldn't have blown up on you like that."

He avoids my gaze for a moment. "I should apologize too, I shouldn't have been so inconsiderate."

"No, no. You don't need to apologize, I should've controlled my emotions better." I say quickly after he's done speaking.

"Can you just let me have this?" He says with a smile.

I smile back. "So we're cool?"

"Yeah." He puts out his fist, waiting for our knuckles to meet.

I lightly tap my knuckles against his. "We should hangout soon. Maybe play Mario Maker levels made by sadistic assholes." I say jokingly.

He responds with a light chuckle, tearing his eyes away from me to look at the ground.

The creek of the shed door opening draws both of our attention away from the conversation.

"Is there someone in there?" He says, mostly to the wind.

We both approach the shed, opening the door more letting the daylight fill the room.

"Must be something wrong with the door." I say out loud before closing it.

I turn to meet Xavier. "I was being serious about doing something soon, I miss spending time with you."

"Maybe we can hangout at the dance on Saturday, purely platonically I mean of course." His face goes slightly red.

"I wasn't going to go, but if you want to hangout there I can." I state uncertainly before pointing behind me with my thumb. "I'm gonna leave, Wednesday is probably waiting for me so she can drag me to a crime scene or something."

"Alright, see you at the dance then." Xavier waves before walking off.

I find my way back behind the bush, accidentally bumping into Wednesday. "Shit, sorry."

I pull out my wand and holding my hand out expectingly. She finds her hand in mine. I tap the wand onto her hand as she becomes visible again.

"Did you find anything?"

"Yes, but let's get back to our dorm first." She states, quickly turning around before she starts walking.

The dorm is filled with sunlight from the sunroof, I find myself sitting in Wednesday's reading chair next to her bulletin board with her standing over me.

I hold Xavier's drawing in my hand with Wednesday's expecting glance over me. "What do you think?"

"I think if anything this makes him more innocent." I state flatly. "He's a psychic like his father, but he told me about how he gets visions in dreams usually in the form of nightmares."

I look up to Wednesday from the drawing. "I also doubt the monster knows this much physical detail about himself."

Wednesday looks at me a bit disappointed by my conclusion.

"But, if this is the case. He could be extremely helpful to our case."

Wednesday's look turns from disappointment to curiosity. "How so."

"He's getting visions about the monster we're hunting. He could likely give us some leads."

Our conversation is cut short as Enid bursts into the room, skipping across the room towards us.

"Good, you both are here." She stops in front of us with a smile. "Are you two going to the Rave'n? I'm about to go out with some friends to find clothes, if you guys are interested you can tag along."

I stand up. "Yeah I'll come with."

Wednesday gives me a confused look. "You're going to the dance?"

"Yeah, I told Xavier that we could spend time together at the dance. Purely platonically of course." I pause for a moment before I continue. "You should come to the dance to, it could be fun."

"Ooo, inviting Wednesday to the dance?" Enid draws out of the o's accusingly.

My face flushes red in embarrassment. "I didn't mean it like that!" I say somehow in the least convincing way possible.

Enid gives me a smug look before glancing past me. Wednesday in now in her section of the room grabbing a few things. "Yeah, yeah. I'm getting tired of waiting! You two just need to-"

I find myself lunging towards Enid, covering her mouth with my hand to force her to stop talking.

"Enid, please stop!" I drag out the e in the word please.

She lightly kicks behind my knee playfully, causing me to fall on top of her.

"Enid!" I shout before scrambling to my feet. Enid has the dumbest smile on her face when I look over her. She's still on the floor.

"Are we leaving or not." Wednesday's monotone voice reaches my ears, causing me to turn around to see her ready to go out.

"Wait, you're actually coming!?" I take a step closer, excitement painting my face and lacing my voice.

"If you two stop bickering." She states flatly

I turn to see Enid's smug face as she's back on her feet now.

I walk past Enid while I head to the door. "Not a word about this."

She nods with the same expression before leaving the room with us.

"What kind of dystopian hell scape is this?" I state with a look of disgust.

Y/n, Enid, and I are standing in front of Hawte Kewture, the clothing store is decorated with blue and pink pastels. So, quite literally, my worst nightmare.

Enid turns to you with excitement. "Our first roomie shopping spree with Wednesday! The dance committee's suggesting all white to match the theme, but that's not gonna fly with Wednesday."

I turn towards them. "I have some more pressing matters to deal with."

Enid's excitement turns into disappointment. "But I thought we were bonding."

"I will meet up with you two later, or you'll meet up with me. Whatever comes first."

Y/n and Enid glance at each other for a moment. "If you say so." You say with slight disappointment in your voice.

You and Enid turn around to enter the store, I take the chance to leave before you manage to persuade me to enter that dungeon of a store.

When I'm walking down the street Thing taps my shoulder as we pass Uriah's Heap. "I'm going to see Galpin, I'm not stop-" I turn to look into the window to see a gothic black dress.

"Hi, Wednesday." The sound of a bell fills the air as my therapist leaves the store. "That dress will certainly turn some heads."

"Are you collecting more exotic trinkets for your office?" I state, drawing the attention away from the dress.

"Those are souvenirs from my travels. That's how I step outside of my comfort zone. Speaking of which, are you going to the Rave'n this weekend?"

"I'm not required to answer your questions out in the wild, am I?" I try to end the conversation.

"I look forward to talking about it at our next session." She turns to leave the other way. I turn to the entrance of the store, taking my time to enter.

I left with the dress in a bag, I wasn't expecting you to manage to persuade me to buy a dress.

I put Xavier's drawing on the sheriff's desk. "We both know there's a monster out there. If we're going to stop it, I think it's time we put our differences aside and work together."

"And this is your stake for me to deal you in?" The sheriff is now holding the drawing, inspecting it before grabbing a photograph and putting them side by side.

"Sorry you gotta do better than that. You've got some nice detail though." He hands me the drawing back.

"I didn't draw it." I fold the drawing before putting it back into my backpack.

"I need to know who did." He states firmly

"Unless we're exchanging intel, I'm not at liberty to say."

He sighs while looking off to the side. "Why would I share information about an ongoing murder investigation with a high school kid?"

"Because I go to Nevermore and you don't. Don't you want some eyes and ears behind those ivy-covered walls?"

"Listen Velma, why don't you and the Scooby gang stick to your homework and leave the investigating to the professionals." The phone starts ringing, causing the sheriff to answer. "What?"

The voice on the other end is slightly distorted by the age of the technology. "Mayor Walker's on line two, he's looking for an update."

I take cue to leave. "Hey, Addams."

The sheriff beckons me over. "Let me see that sketch again."

I walk back in, handing him the drawing.

"The person who drew this, that your suspect?"

I shake my head. "I believe he's having visions about it."

The sheriff is silent for a moment. "When you bring me some concrete evidence, maybe we'll talk."

I take the sketch back, before leaving the police station.

I'm sitting inside the Weathervane with Enid and her friends. I see Wednesday walk past though the window. "I'll be right back, I'm gonna check on Wednesday real quick."

Everyone at the table quietly acknowledges my statement before I leave the store.

The bell of the door fills the air. "Wednesday!" She turns around as I catch up.

"I see you found something." I look towards her bag.

We both continue walking, rounding a corner to be met with Tyler on the other side.

"Don't wanna ask what trouble you two are in now." Tyler looks past us for a second, looking at the sheriff's office behind us.

"Nothing we can't handle. Your father's in particularly frustrating form today. Avoid." Wednesday says as Tyler draws his vision back to us.

"Yeah, welcome to my world." Tyler murmurs before changing the conversation. "You guys have the Rave'n this weekend, right? It was all the buzz at the Weathervane today."

"Yeah, the Rave'ns this weekend." I answer, curious on where he's going.

"Are you going with anyone Wednesday?" Tyler asks, a bit of nervousness to his voice.

I find Wednesday glancing at me for a moment. "I'm going with Y/n."

I look at Wednesday trying to conceal my shock.

He avoids eye contact for a moment "Hope you two have fun." Disappointment laces his voice as he walks past us

Wednesday turns around to face him. "I'm not sure why you're upset."

"That's kind of the problem." Tyler turns around to meet us again. "I mean, call me crazy, Wednesday, but you keep giving me these signals.

"You're crazy." I interject myself into the conversation to be met with a scowl from Tyler.

His eyes soften again before meeting Wednesday's. "I thought we liked each other, but then you pull something like this, and I have no idea where I stand. I mean, am I in the more than friend zone or just a pawn in some game you're playing."

There's a lull in the conversation before Wednesday continues. "I like girls, Tyler."

My ears perk up at this wonderful news.

"I mean, yeah clearly. You're going with her." Tyler gestures his hand towards me. "Sorry, that was mean."

There was another lull in the conversation filled with awkward silence.

He points behind himself. "I guess I'll see you guys around." He turns around to walk away.

I walk into my shared dorm room to get ready for the Rave'n early. The room is dark as the sun has set. I'm the only soul in here. I assume Wednesday is still moving the evidence board to the bee shed.

Enid wasn't the biggest fan of having a board covered in pictures of corpse parts in the dorm.

I approach my desk to be greeted with a letter with the initials 'W.A.'

I pick it up, carefully opening the envelope as to not tear anything.

Dear Y/n Y/l/n,

I'm having trouble trying to find the words, this is all new to me. I believe I may have some sort of 'feelings' for you. Every time we come in to contact, I have this nauseating feeling in the pit of my stomach. My heart races, unable to be calm in the presence of your touch. Yet, I'm insatiable for more.

I believe you may reciprocate these feelings, so why must we pretend otherwise? I want to attend this dance together more than merely friends.

However, if you don't reciprocate these feelings, I demand you burn this letter and forget this happened.

Wednesday Addams

The happiest smile slips onto my face as I jump in place. I put the letter in the top drawer of my desk before the door to the dorm opens.

Wednesday walks through the doorway, gazing towards me. She seems nervous.

"Wednesday!" I practically run to close the distance, my smile somehow getting bigger now that she's in my presence.

"I assume you found the letter." She states with a hint of worry.

I quickly nod. "Yes, and my answer is yes!"

Wednesday releases an exhale of relief. I see the weight release off her chest through her perfect posture.

"Can I uhm." I am now much quieter, my face quickly flushing red. "Can we hug?"

After Wednesday is silent for a moment and avoiding eye contact, I worry I may have overstepped.

"It's okay if you-"

"Yes." I find Wednesday's eyes have finally met mine again. "Please."

My smile returns before I wrap my arms around her into a warm embrace. Wednesday stands there for a moment with her arms by her side, unsure what to do.

Eventually, Wednesday reciprocates the hug. Wrapping her arms around my waist. Her touch is cool yet comforting.

We both untangle ourselves from the embrace, the warmth of each other's touch lingering on our skin.

"I'm going to get ready." I tell Wednesday, before heading to my closet.

I find myself waiting outside at the bottom of the stairs outside the dorm room. I didn't take as long as Wednesday to get ready.

I turn to the sound of Wednesday's heels tapping against the stairs. She's wearing this beautiful black gothic dress.

I can't help but gawk at the beauty descending the stairs. She looks ethereal.

"Wow, Wednesday. You look... " I'm silent for a moment, trying to find the right words and the confidence to speak them.

"Unrecognizable? Ridiculous?"

I find myself stumped for another moment. "Beautiful, I mean it Wednesday you have me at a loss for words."

Her gaze softens at my sentiment. Her eyes scan my body, silently admiring my appearance.

She breaks eye contact for a moment. "We can hold hands, if that's something you want to do."

I think it's so cute that's she trying to play it off as if she doing it for me.

"Yeah, I'd like that." I hold my hand out, waiting for hers to meet mine before our fingers interlock. I feel a jolt of electricity shoot through me from her contact, bringing to life the butterflies in my stomach.

"Shall we go?" I can tell by the slight shakiness to her voice I'm having the same effect on her.

I nod, my smile impossible to hide, as we make our way to the dance.

Wednesday and I walk through the entrance, our fingers interlocked. The sound of pop music fills the room as I feel everyone's eyes on us before Ms. Thornhill approaches. "Wednesday, Y/n. What a lovely surprise.

Thornhill's eyes stare at our hands. "I didn't know you two were a couple." She says with a smile

Wednesday and I glance at each other. "It's kind of a new thing." I say awkwardly.

"We're going to get drinks." Wednesday states, mostly to me.

"Have fun you two!" Ms Thornhill says with a smile as we walk away.

We approach the long table together. I squeeze Wednesday's hand so I don't get use to her touch.

"OMG I love the look!" Enid approaches, excitement filling her very being. We both turn towards her and she notices our hands.

Enid's eyes go wide. "Wait are you two officially a thing now?!"

I feel the temperature of my face drastically rise, Wednesday turns her face to see mine.

"I uh-" I start to say before Wednesday interrupts me.

"Interesting choice of date." Wednesday states flatly, looking past Enid to see Lucas.

I follow Wednesday's eyes, finding Lucas standing awkwardly.

"Wait, your date is Lucas Walker? You know he's the worst right?" I say, a hint of malice in my voice.

"It's not what it looks like." Enid says defensively.

"Good, because that pilgrim already has two strikes in my book." Wednesday is practically staring daggers at Lucas.

"Lucas is trying to make his ex jealous, and I'm trying to make Ajax jealous. It's a win-win."

"Why can't you just talk to Ajax instead of doing this? Communication is important." I say, ending my sentence quickly as I see Lucas approaching.

He puts his hands up like we're arresting him. "Wednesday, Y/n, I come in peace."

"That's a shame, I brought my pocket mace." Wednesday says, causing Lucas to lower his arm with a bit of fear etched onto his face. "The medieval kind."

Wednesday turns to grab herself and I a drink as Enid and Lucas walk away. "Just to let you know in advance, tomorrow night we're going to stake out a cave with Eugene. Eugene saw something in one of Xavier's drawing."

Wednesday hands me the drink. "I haven't been too good at keeping you up to date on our plans. I apologize."

I grab the drink. "It's cool, thanks for the heads up." I motion to dink Wednesday's and I's drinks together before each of us takes a sip.

We both turn as we see Xavier approach us at of our peripheral vision. "Hey Xavier! Did you ever find someone to come with?"

He looks around awkwardly for a moment. "Yeah uh, I came with Bianca."

The smile fades from my face. "What, why would you do that?"

Xavier shrugs. "Better than going alone I guess."

There is a lull in the conversation until 'The Goo Goo Muck' by 'The Cramps' started playing.

Wednesday drags me towards the crowd dancing. "Dance with me."

"Wednesday, I don't know I'm not much of a dancer." There's a hint of anxiety on my face as we get closer to the crowd.

"Why'd you agree to come to the dance with me if we weren't going to dance." She's dragging me in-between people now, persistent on the idea.

"I uh-" I find myself still as Wednesday let's go of my hand.

I find her eyes staring into mine intensely as she starts to get into the music, shaking her shoulders back and forth to the rhythm. I stand there awkwardly, watching her.

Her movements are rigid, but rhythmic. I find myself entranced.

I leave the trance after a few moments, remembering where I am. I look around to find people staring, and I can't tell if it's the good or bad kind.

My heartbeat accelerates at the sudden attention. I find myself unable to move. Do people think I'm weird? Why won't I dance?

I force my legs to move, shaking from the anxiety as I walk through the crowd of people dancing.

"Y/n?" I faintly hear Wednesday's voice as I make more distance.

I find an almost empty area just outside the party. I sigh as I sit down.

"Y/n?" I hear Wednesday's voice again as she sits down next to me. "Are you okay?"

"Yeah, I just. I get overwhelmed by crowds easily." I say, an awkward silence fills the air besides the muted sound of the music from the party.

"I'm sorry, I shouldn't have forced you." Wednesday states, a hint of empathy in her voice.

I find myself staring at the floor. "I want you to have fun as well though."

I find myself having difficulty choosing between looking at Wednesday and avoiding all eye contact, flickering between both.

"How about we take it slower." Wednesday scots closer, my eyes manage to remain on Wednesday's empathetic ones. "When a slow song plays, we'll dance together. I'll lead and guide you as we move along to the music."

I find myself nodding with a smile. "Okay, thank you Wends." A little bit of the anxiety fading.

Bianca walks in, taking a seat near us. I hold back any negative comments as it could effect Xavier's night as well. I notice her eyes are slightly glossy.

"I know this isn't usually something I'd ask you, but are you okay?" I ask, slight concern in my voice

Bianca looks at me before shrugging, looking away again the next moment.

Wednesday and I exchange a glance. "Do you want to talk about it?" I ask.

After another moment of silence, Wednesday interjects. "Where's Xavier?"

"We had a little tiff." Bianca says, giving in. "About you two actually."

Wednesday and I share a concerned glance. "What about us?" We say simultaneously.

"He wasn't expecting to see you two together. He was happy for you at first, but there was jealousy building up or something. After he saw you two dancing, or more so saw Wednesday dancing and you standing there, he asked me to use my siren song on him to have him forget his feelings."

I look away for a second, ignoring her comment before speaking. "He did that?"

Bianca nods with her eyes slightly more glossy. I can imagine how used she must feel.

Our conversation is cut short when a scream finds it way to our room. Wednesday and I instantly stand, looking towards the noise which is followed by multiple screams.

Wednesday grabs my hand as we run side by side back to the dance, where the screams originated. Some people covered in what looks like blood run past us.

After we squeeze through the crowd, we find the sprinklers are spraying the supposed blood all over the party.

Wednesday smiles at the scene before sticking out her hand under the continuous splatter, putting her finger to her mouth to taste whatever it is.

My face contorts a bit in disgust.

Wednesday's amused smile quickly fades. "They couldn't even spring for real pigs' blood." Her shoulders drop in disappointment. "It's only paint."

People continuously run past us in fear, unable to tell who's bumping into who. Suddenly, Wednesday's head falls back, entering a vision.

I hold Wednesday to avoid her falling and for us to not be trampled. As the crowd loses volume, Wednesday comes back. "Eugene is in the woods."

She meets my eyes with concern. "He's in danger."

Wednesday grabs my hand before running with the crowd. Letting go of my hand whenever we escape the crowd, we soon find ourselves leaving the school into the woods.

The hectic sound of our panic-filled footsteps fill the forest with the crunching of leaves. The moonlight casting a pale glow over the forest.

I wave my wand out, emitting a blue light to guide the way.

"Eugene!" Wednesday and I take turns shouting. My heart beating at a thousand miles an hour, my legs burning at the sudden activity.

We both stop for a moment, looking around. "Eugene?!" I shout.

"Y/n! over here!" We hear Eugene yell.

Wednesday and I turn towards his voice, running towards it as fast as possible

We find Eugene laying in the fallen leaves. "Eugene." Wednesday states, standing in place.

I quickly approach Eugene, kneeling beside him. He has three fresh claw wounds across his chest, the blood pouring out of them. I close my eyes, recalling a spell I've been practicing the past few months.

I put my wand to the end of one of the claw marks running across his torso, blood trickling out staining his clothes.

"Oh my God! Is he alive?!" Ms Thornhill approaches from behind.

I close my eyes in frustration and panic. "Everyone please shut up!" I shout, overwhelmed. "I need to concentrate."

Everyone goes silent, staring at my back. I put my wand back to the top of the wound, running it down smoothly till it reaches the bottom.

"Vulnera, Sanentur." My voice utters the incantations slowly and rhythmically in a hushed lullaby.

I repeat the incantation, following the same motion. This time, the blood starts to clear away into nothing. Cleaning the wound.

I pause for a moment, before doing the incantation one more time. The wound knitting itself shut.

I take a deep inhale. "Two more to go." I utter to myself, feeling the four eyes behind me staring into me like daggers.

I find the end of the second cut, my wand trembling. I take another deep breath to collect myself.

"Vulnera Sanentur." It feels as if my voice is the only sound in the world.

Whenever I finish with that cut, I feel my eyes getting glossy. The stress overflowing my body. I can't break down just yet. I find the last cut, casting the healing spell one last time.

I stare at his unconscious body, at his healed but new found scars. Tears start to stream down my face, the stress escaping my body.

I put my hands over eyes, my shoulders slumped forward. The sound of my sobs echo amongst the trees. The sense of relief strengthening my overwhelmed tears.

Part 8.

Past Lives Masterlist

[airenyah]

#i feel like a lot of the bad acting accusations are because of the tremor (?) and I'm pretty sure those are just part of his body

@jjsanguine i agree! i think a lot of it comes from how fidgety he was on camera in star in my mind. (sorry, longer rant incoming! when i say "you" in the following text i don't mean you, user @jjsanguine, but i mean the general you. i'm just letting off some steam, i'm not addressing you or yelling at you directly dfjkjsdkjg)

but yeah, the shakiness he had going on in the beginning... that's just a very technical aspect that is pretty fucking difficult when you're new to camera acting, because news flash: you can't move the same way on camera like you can irl. the camera magnifies each and every single one of your movements, especially the more into a close-up you get. you know how many times i've had to listen to my camera acting teacher scold us for moving too much on camera? for being too fidgety? i lost count, because it happened at least once (usually multiple times) in every single class for three years straight. and learning how to move (or rather how to hold still) on camera is something you can only learn by, you know, acting on camera!! and when exactly was dunk supposed to learn that before simm??

idk, maybe i had more mercy with dunk when it came to this since i know from my very own experience how difficult this is when you're not used to it (for me it was even more difficult because my only experience came from stage acting where it's the exact opposite, where everything needs to be bigger and louder instead of smaller and more quiet) but still, i think bashing him for that is very much uncalled for. besides, you can literally see his improvement when it comes to this!! he barely fidgets anymore in thk, despite style being a character with a high energy level. and not just that, you could already see the improvement back in 2023, the year after simm!! just look at how still dunk holds his body in this music video from hidden agenda/our skyy 2 era:

you know, in star in my mind there are a few things through which you can tell the lack of experience, which is why back then i didn't really say anything yet when people where bashing him. but when i saw dunk's (dunk the actor, not dunk the singer lol) performance in this music video back in july 2023 (i think i first saw it two or three days after its release?) my jaw literally dropped. the moment i saw him in this mv that's when i knew he was very much a fantastic actor. and it's not just not in the lack of fidgeting

they don't have a single line in the entire mv and yet all of dunk's emotions are completely on point. he knows exactly what he's doing and what story he wants to tell at any given point. his character's emotional arc is coherent and as a viewer you know exactly what is going on inside of him, you can tell what he's thinking and how he's feeling the entire time and it all makes sense. dunk's character and how he feels about the situation and about joong's character is the most interesting part of the story presented in the mv, tbh. dunk really carries the mv, and he carries it flawlessly

but going back to simm, another issue was that sometimes he'd act a bit too big, in a way where it would be more fitting for a stage performance but it's too big for the camera because, as i mentioned, the camera magnifies everything. this is again something that he had to learn by, you know, actually acting on camera?!!!!!! and besides, it was simm director p'new who wanted this from him:

Dunk: "I discussed Daonuea's character with the director. He recommended that I watch anime and animal cartoon characters. They display visible responses and feelings. Daonuea expresses a lot, with big reactions. He clearly shows it when he’s shocked or happy. People can see what he is feeling at the time. They can tell right away. He doesn’t hide it. It's fun to be able to showcase my childish side in the series." [from: simm behind the scenes special, 7:29 (time stamp linked)]

"act big like a cartoon character" is a suuuper difficult instruction to give to a newbie actor because in order to do this flawlessly you do need to be fully aware of how everything you do will end up looking on camera so that you can actually nail the right balance. and this was an experience/expertise which dunk simply just didn't have at the time. simm was dunk's very first series (not counting his handful of scenes in bad buddy), so of course he's not gonna nail these tricky instructions on the very first try. and i think bashing him just for that is just a very shitty thing to do. it's one thing to say "ok i don't have the patience to sit through this so i'm not gonna watch it" but you really don't have to be mean about it, that's just really uncalled for. everyone starts somewhere, you know?

and now two years later after having gained much more experience and expertise, dunk does an EXCELLENT job with style's loudness and performative behaviour. dunk makes very deliberate choices about when he dials it up and when he goes quiet and serious instead and every single time these choices are extremely on point for the plot and where the character is at in his arc (don't believe me? i have a whole meta series about it where i continue to point out when style is being loud/performative/overacts and why he does it and why it makes complete sense). honestly, i think some people currently bashing his performance either went into thk just set on hating whatever he does on principle or they simply don't vibe with the character. and it's totally fair not to vibe with a character's personality! i grew up around boys who are exactly like style so i know first hand how exhausting they can be and that not everyone will get along with them. but it's not the actor's fault if you don't get along with people of this type of personality, that's very much a you problem

anyway, another aspect in simm where i thought dunk needed a bit more practice was the crying. i didn't always entirely believe him when he was crying in simm. it was going in the right direction, but it still seemed to me that he wasn't quite feeling it and was forcing it a bit. although, admittedly for this one big crying scene (the one in the parking lot after kluen kissed dao in the men's room) the faults as to why this scene doesn't really work already start with the directing. p'new messed up the dramaturgical structure of that scene and at the time the boys and esp dunk just simply didn't have the expertise to get the arcs and the structure of this scene right by themselves without outside help. and so it's no wonder dunk struggled with the mess of that scene (i swear every time i watch that scene i hear my camera acting teacher's voice in my head asking where all the plot points are lol). anyway, the crying was also a bit better a year later in hidden agenda, though i was still not entirely convinced at certain points. but then in early 2024 the boys dropped the joongdunk last twilight mv and dunk really put his whole pussy into the crying, like, that shit's heartbreaking. and they did that in their free time past midnight after a fanmeet in a foreign country. my mouth was agape when i saw it (dunk's sobbing, that it). we have yet to see style cry on thk, but i'm already curious to see if i'm still gonna have issues with it or if dunk has finally reached the point where he's really feeling it and where he can let the tears fall freely and naturally like he was able to in the last twilight mv (or maybe he just needs joong to direct him in crying scenes in order to ace them sndnfjjfjf)

anyway, the whole point of this rant is that you can criticize an actor's performance. nobody is perfect. everyone has to start somewhere. so yes, absolutely you can criticize someone's performance. and nobody forces you to like every single actor's performance. sometimes you're just not vibing, and that's totally okay! but you don't have to be unnecessarily mean about it. and more importantly, you have to be open to an artist's improvement as well and at the very least acknowledge it, even if you're still not vibing. and let me tell you something, as someone who's been following all of dunk's series live since episode 2 of simm (and technically even since ep3 of bad buddy), it's really been such a joy to see him grow and develop his skills as a performer. especially as someone who from the start has already appreciated the things he does excel at. and there are many things he excels at, many things that he's done so excellently even back in simm and hidden agenda that it really outshines the imperfections in his performance even back when he was less experienced than he is now

airenyah out.

@secriden you don't know the feeling of getting these tags into my notifs after feeling like i've been the sole public defender of dunk's acting for the past year and a half (and that's only counting the time i started being more vocal about it online, i've been defending him in my mind since 2022 actually)

truly TRULY love the energy you bring!!!!! join me!!!!!

DUNK IS A GOOD FUCKING ACTOR AND HAS BEEN FROM THE START. EVERYONE WAS JUST UNNECESSARILY MEAN

[agentark]

whatever you do, don't imagine a young J Corvin waiting every day at the end of their drive, hoping today is the day the mail carrier finally brings a letter from their very best friend