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#i don’t have class until 11:30 but
kuiinncedes · 2 years
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:p
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one thing abt being disabled/chronically ill that some people don’t get is that sometimes body maintenance that ensures you have the absolute minimum amount of function can also be something that takes away a lot of control and autonomy. you can argue till the cows come home that making those decisions to try and help yourself (or realistically to try to make sure things aren’t worse than they already are) is something that exhibits control and autonomy and stuff, but they can be so limiting in practice because they’re things that take up so much time but have to be done to do anything else
#i have to sleep a lot. i’m at the point where functioning requires 8 hours of sleep if not more#I should probably be getting 10+ but i’m a student and i work so 8 is the minimum. but then also getting ready for bed is a whole process s#the whole thing can take 10-12 hours depending how much im sleeping. just to make sure i can do anything#that is time in my day i cannot use for anything else. it’s not ‘oh but i can push through it’ because i can’t without spending the next da#lightheaded and nauseous and vaguely dizzy and with such intense brain fog I can’t think with my fatigue so bad i genuinely don’t know how#get myself to work a lot of days. my abled peers don’t have to deal with this at all. they have unlimited study time if they want to#and yeah it is a choice i’m making that’s true i could just not do. except i would lose my job and fail out of college because i would not#be able to get to classes or do my homework or think. but being told ‘but you are making choices about your life’ when i have lost so much#of what i used to be able to do because i am spiralling down and continuing to get worse is so.#literally last year i would wake up at 6:30 and then go to school till 3 and then go to my internship until 10 and get home at 11 and be in#bed anywhere from midnight to two in the morning and then wake up the next day and do it all again. i graduated with a 3.9 gpa and made it#into my top college while dealing with my cancer symptoms and then the two surgeries about it#but now i lose half my day to just making sure i can get out of bed. i can’t go anywhere because my body is physically too exhausted#any extra time goes into doing homework or occasionally time to myself#not decimating my health by doing minimum body care responsibilities isn’t freeing. occasionally i have a good day which is freeing but tha#usually goes into just. other things outside class or work or eating. I don’t go do something for myself or go do something fun on good day#because I still can’t. good days just mean i don’t want to lie down on the pavement when i’m going somewhere#I just. I don’t magically have control over my life because i try to get enough sleep. i lose half my day to doing that and ultimately it’s#just a bodily function that would have to happen anyway#this is a vent post im just having a really hard time right now because it feels like im in exponential decline. it was nowhere near this#bad last semester. my grades are tanking and i have no free time because anything outside of sleep is either work or school#vent tw#yall can rb this just ignore my tags completely#disability#chronically ill#i keep trying to explain to people how pots works because that’s all logical but there’s no way to explain what it’s doing to my body or ho#i feel all the time. the last time i felt this bad was when i had a bad flu or immediately after surgeries because i don’t react well to#anesthesia and always come out of them feeling like shit. and now i just feel like this all the time and it’s only getting worse#I can’t even stay up late anymore because my body feels like it isn’t counting the sleep even if I get 8 hours#I can deal if I have a free day the day after but that just leaves Friday and Saturday nights and I usually still have to do homework
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esa-shygurl · 5 months
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Fully regretting joining the esthi program 😩
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anders-hawke · 1 year
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finally managing to teach myself to go to bed at 12 and wake up at 8
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jonathanstims · 2 years
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I don’t understand how things work out so well for me sometimes
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gucciwins · 2 years
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and…my first class of the day is canceled
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saltyspecs · 2 years
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Sorry professor I’m late for class because I have the sleepy eepies. Yeah it’s terminal. Yeah no I was gonna get up but then I got comfy again and I am afraid the bed has consumed me. No consequences please.
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chenlesfavorite · 3 months
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GOT MY ION YOU, mark lee
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you’ve failed yet another chemistry exam, high chances are you’re gonna have to retake the entire class next year and miss out on almost all school breaks due to studying and fixing your bad grades, and that is until your trusty friend suggests a tutor to you.
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— pairing: tutor!mark x fem!reader
— faceclaim: y/n’s faceclaim is minnie from gidle (for picture purposes) but no actual visual descriptions/details of y/n will be given so you can imagine her however you’d like!
— genres: social media au (smau), half written, friends to lovers, fluff
— extra: y/n likes taeyong, mark likes y/n, mark is down bad for y/n
— warnings: lots of death jokes.. that’s about it
— playlist: If I Could Tell Her - Dear Evan Hansen musical | we can’t be friends (wait for your love) - Ariana Grande | So let’s go see the stars - BOYNEXTDOOR | I Don’t Want to Be Friends - Jake Scott | Lie With You - TEN | Night Changes - One Direction | Still Into You - Paramore | My Number One - Helena Paparizou | 200 - MARK
— authors note: my first fic on tumblr.. and also idk how to use tumblr, excuse me for any mistakes i may make on here 😭 ignore the times/dates on the tweets.. can’t be bothered to fix them sorry ☹️
— status: completed
— taglist: closed
divider credit to enchanthings !!
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profiles 1 | profiles 2
1. uh oh
2. number
3. private
4. first tutoring session! (half smau/half written)
5. hang out plan
6. seriously? (half smau/half written)
7. inside the haunted house (fully written)
8. just a friend!
9. awkward…
10. personal hangout
11. fun times
12. truth revealed
13. team who?
14. facetime
15. a shared trip
16. cute… sometimes!
17. who is it about?
18. ice cream (half smau/half written)
19. heart hand emoji
20. new crush alert
21. results and gifts
22. plane ride
23. matching!
24. he’s admiring your beauty
25. lipgloss or lipstick? (fully written)
26. mark’s what? girl?!
27. shenanigans before meeting up
28. happy new year’s! (fully written)
29. official launch
30. the end (fully written)
— END —
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liliansun · 1 year
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summary : college was enough to deal with, barely passing classes and struggling to keep up with what was going on in each was a daily struggle. not having time to catch someone’s eye was fine with you, that was until you met him. there was something about him that was enchanting, so you went out to find him, hoping you kept him up the same way he did you.
college kids : nct dream members, my friends are the inspiration for the female profiles (joy, loki, niwa and esa) andb random supporting cast
started : 07 | 16 | 23 finished : 10 | 10 | 23
warnings : mostly posted by chapter, language, mentions of alcohol, college au, fluff, angst, strangers to lovers, lying, anything else will be added accordingly <3 (if you can’t tell it’s tswift based bc i’m obsessed w the song)
taglist : please send in an ask or comment to be added
🎧 : part of the speak now (polaroid version) playlist
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00 : [ bitches love the gram ] : [ soon 2 be college drop outs ]
01 : don’t act like you don’t like it
02 : double whammy
03 : you’re bitchless bro
04 : …not that ham
05 : determined to do so (1.4k)
06 : short kings need love too
07 : da new da vinci
08 : what the fuck is 922?
09 : mom and mom are fighting
10 : INFILTRATE THE LUNCH
11 : who’s haechan?
12 : i don’t trust men
13 : no offense taken
14 : you need more sleep then
15 : well that hurted
16 : he’s easy to please
17 : lil man complex
18 : i breathe and for what
19 : is he gone yet?
20 : deserve to be heard (2.2k)
21 : she’s safe
22 : where is haechan.
23 : one last time (0.7k)
24 : platonic soulmates
25 : it’s not me this time
26 : only love can hurt like this
27 : tswift era
28 : so i may be lost
29 : sad and sulky
30 : run to me instead
31 : a couple of besties
32 : regular huh
33 : officially official
34 : it’d always be her [ final ]
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elliesbelle · 1 year
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nobody compares to you
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chapter 11
pairing: ellie x reader
synopsis: you're in your junior year of college and at a party, you run into the girl who broke your heart: ellie williams. despite the time it took to reset your life, will you risk a broken heart again for her?
content warnings: modern college au, cursing, angst, descriptions of alcohol and underage drinking, mentions of homophobic slurs, descriptions of marijuana use, men being creepy in general, drama between exes, descriptions of an anxiety attack, mentions of nausea and vomiting, minors do not interact
word count: 10.2k
chapters: one, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight, nine, ten, eleven, twelve, thirteen, fourteen
series masterlist
my masterlist
i have a ko-if if you like my work so much that you feel compelled to tip me ♡︎
the "nobody compares to you" spotify playlist
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Freshman Year, Fall
You’d never been to a college party, much less a frat party. The extent of your knowledge was taught by cheesy and likely inaccurate movies where all the characters were all played by 30-year-olds pushing 40. But after the shit show that was your senior year of high school, you were looking forward to celebrating your newfound freedom through underage drinking and close-quartered gyrating.
Your roommate's name was Tara Maclay, a honey-blonde tomboy who wore baggy clothing and had a foul but amusing mouth. Your first few days involved polite conversation and awkward apologies when you’d accidentally invade the other’s personal space. However, after a late night of deep conversation, you’d discovered that you were both lesbians and felt a friendship click almost immediately.
During yet another freshman orientation, this time for your dorm held by your RAs in one of the lounges, you’d both befriended a few other girls who also resided in your building, Wilson Valley. The first you’d met was a girl named Astrid. She was tall, skinny, and had long black & blonde braids that swayed gracefully every time she moved. You couldn’t help but notice the way Tara eyed her, nudging her playfully to break her out of her slack-jawed loser lesbian stupor.
Astrid had greeted you both sweetly and introduced you to a couple more girls she’d already met: Sidney and Rebecca, who happened to live right in the same hall as you and Tara. Astrid mentioned she had a roommate as well, who couldn’t come to the meeting. You vaguely recalled she said her name was Dina.
After your RAs ended the meeting and dismissed the rest of the residents, your newfound group lingered in the lounge. You continued to chat lightly about nonsensical topics like new classes and room assignments and the campus until Rebecca mentioned a party being thrown the next night.
“My roommate Kristen mentioned that this frat is having a ‘Start of the Year’ party or something tomorrow!” She said, settling into one of the ratty couches. “Not sure if you guys would be interested in that, but I thought that would be cool to go to, even just for the experience.”
Tara grimaced before saying, “An excuse for asshole, predatory frat guys to prey on freshman girls?”
“Could maybe still be fun, though,” Astrid mused. “Nice excuse to get fucked up and all.”
“Well, I guess the free booze isn’t so bad.” Tara quickly said, changing her tune instantly. You chuckled quietly at her.
“What’s the frat?” You asked.
“Uhh,” Rebecca pondered for a moment. “I think… Sigma… something? I honestly don’t remember. I’ll ask Kristen later.”
“All of them just sound the same anyway,” Sidney shrugged, sitting criss-cross applesauce on the carpeted floor next to the couch. “I’m totally up for it if you guys go, though. Good way to be social. I don’t really have friends around here just yet.”
You turned towards her.
“We’re all your friends, so you do now.” You said, smiling at her.
Sidney returned your smile with a wide one of her own.
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You’d already set out your desired outfit on your bed for the Sigma Eta party when you sat by your desk, applying your makeup. Behind you, Tara was clumsily rummaging through her clothes, cursing under her breath as she kept changing her mind about her party attire.
“What the fuck do you even wear to frat parties, dude?” She said, throwing yet another unfolded, creased shirt into her dresser.
“Honestly, I don’t really know. I’ve mostly gone to high school theatre cast parties, and I don’t think those really count as real parties.” You replied, lightly brushing a small spoolie through one of your eyebrows.
“Am I supposed to look fucking nice, or—?”
“Just be yourself!” You jokingly said.
Through your makeup mirror, you saw Tara give you an annoyed grimace in the reflection. You laughed.
“That’s stupid ass advice.” She groaned in frustration.
“Sorry!” You apologized in jest. “I mean, you’re not really there to attract guys. Don’t have to be all dressed up and all if you don’t want to be.”
“You’re getting all dressed the fuck up.” Tara pointed out, motioning towards your outfit on the bed.
“I just like looking nice,” You shrugged. “Just for myself, not really for anyone else. Like I said, you don’t have to get all dressed up if you don’t want to. Unless there’s someone you’re trying to impress.”
“I mean, I didn’t say that…” She grumbled, almost indiscernible underneath her breath.
“Oh?” You said, momentarily pausing your makeup routine to turn towards her with an eyebrow raised. “Why? Is there a certain someone you wanna look good for?” You inquired.
Tara refused to meet your inquisitive eyes as she fidgeted with another shirt’s buttons between her hands.
“I knew it!” You laughed, pointing the makeup brush you held in your hand towards her. “You like Astrid!”
“No, I fucking do not!” Tara responded defensively.
“You have a crush on Astrid,” You said in a sing-song voice. “You have a crush on Astrid!”
“Shut the fuck up, dude!”
“You think she’s pretty, you want her to have your babies!” You continued to sing, cackling as you turned back to your desk to resume your eye makeup.
“I will physically fight you, you dick!” Tara warned noncommittally.
“Save all those kinky threats for your new girlfriend.” You chuckled as you effortlessly blended two shades of eyeshadow with one another.
“Ugh,” She groaned as she flopped down on her bed. “She’s so fucking straight though. Like, painfully fucking straight. Like, not just heterosexual. Barbie heterosexual.”
“First of all,” You said as you set down the makeup brush in your hand to grab your setting spray. “Barbie is so gay, so that point is useless.”
“Barbie is not fucking gay, man.” Tara argued.
“Barbie is a lesbian with comphet and Ken is her lavender marriage boyfriend,” You disagree, fanning your freshly sprayed face. “Secondly, Astrid is one hundred percent a dyke too.”
“Did you fucking see her, dude?”
“Yes, I did. I have eyes, Tara.”
“Yes, I do too.”
“But not a good enough gaydar though, it looks like.”
“What the fuck!”
“Trust me, Tara,” You said, turning towards her once more to look her straight in the eyes. “There is not a single straight bone in that girl’s body, I guarantee it. If you weren’t so busy checking her out before, you would have noticed it too. Might have even noticed that she was also checking you out.”
“Wait. Hold the fuck up, seriously?” Tara said, perking up for a second before suddenly looking nervous.
“Dude, this is no time to be a fucking pussy! She’s really pretty and seems to like you back. Just get to know her tonight!”
“You think she’s pretty?” She asked.
“I mean, yeah, of course. She is gorgeous.” You admit. “But you’re okay, I’m not competition. She’s not my type, trust me.”
“Really?”
“Yeah, kind of discovered after my last relationship that I’m more into like, masc and butch lesbians.”
“Oh?” Tara said intriguingly, abandoning her search for appropriate clothing to take a seat on her bed. “How do you mean exactly?”
“Well,” You said, twirling your eyeliner pen in between your fingers as you turned in your chair to face her again. “My ex-girlfriend was a little bit more feminine than masculine. And I mean, I guess I was attracted to her in different kinds of ways, but I think that I was drawn more to her personality than her looks.”
You sighed before continuing.
“Which, obviously, I think is very important, but I also believe that you’ve gotta be physically attracted to who you’re with too, you know? Not in a shallow way or anything. But I don’t think I really ever felt that click with her, even at the start. It was just another unrealistic expectation I had of her that ultimately cemented the end of our relationship.”
Tara hummed in understanding.
“So why masculine lesbians, then? I’m just curious as someone who presents more as masculine but who tends to like more feminine girls.” She asked.
You pondered her question for a few moments, considering your response.
“There’s just… I don’t know, there’s just something so bold and alluring about a woman who completely rejects femininity in every possible way. We’re all expected to fill that role of being gentle and ladylike, and I think it’s just so attractive when a girl openly says ‘fuck you’ to that and presents the way she actually wants to, not the way the rest of the world expects of her. I love it when women are exclusively masculine, almost like they’re showing men how it’s supposed to be done. I think it’s just so hot and charming and sexy.”
“Ooh, so you think I’m sexy and shit?” Tara teases, wiggling her eyebrows at you as you conclude your mini-speech.
“No, you’re way too much of a loser lesbian who can’t even tell the difference between a straight girl and a femme lesbian.”
“Hey, not too fucking much now!” Tara said indignantly.
You laughed loudly before going back to applying your winged eyeliner.
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A few moments later, you heard a knock followed by Astrid, Rebecca, and her roommate Kristen after you shouted that your door was unlocked. Kristen, a short and perky girl with her dirty blonde hair up in two long pigtails, introduced herself and said that her friend Mina was also tagging along later on, in addition to two other people she didn’t mention.
It was incredibly amusing to you how red and flustered Tara became as a result of Astrid’s sudden appearance. You even felt a little bit giddy yourself when Astrid graciously offered to help pick out an outfit for Tara to wear for tonight’s party.
It wasn’t long after the three girls arrived that Sidney joined the rest of your group, having done herself up a bit as well in a short, pink dress and pieces of curly hair styled to fall from her space buns. You all enthusiastically complimented her and hyped her up, to which she blushed.
You were the last one to finish getting ready, the rest of your new friends every now and again watching you finish your makeup routine as they all chatted animatedly. They all gawked in awe at the way you’d artistically dolled up your face, Kristen commenting that Michaelangelo couldn’t have painted colours the way you did your eyeshadow (to which you humourously and geekily remark that he was more of a sculptor than a painter). The girls all loudly squealed at how expertly you applied your fake eyelashes within mere seconds, you chuckling to yourself at how easily amused they seemed to be.
As all the girls began to pre-game with a bottle of Bacardi spiced rum Kristen had brought, you threw on the rest of your outfit: a long-sleeved, lacy and see-through white top with a black bra underneath, a black mini-skirt with side pockets, and your favourite knee-high black boots. You joined in the drinking festivities before Astrid checked the time and her messages then suggested you all head out to meet Kristen’s friend Mina and head towards the Sigma Eta party.
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You all squeezed into a rickety, old elevator located in the middle of the hallway and headed down to the first floor of your building. As the elevator doors opened up to the lobby, Kristen broke off from the rest of the group when she spotted another girl waiting with two guys by the front doors. Kristen squealed happily and gave her a tight hug before introducing her friend to the rest of you.
Mina was a girl with short kinky blonde hair that reached just above her shoulders. She wore a white halter top with dark blue jeans accompanied by black pumps. To her left was a short, brown-haired guy with a plain, blue button-down and a pair of salmon-coloured shorts; to her right was a tall, dark-haired boy wearing an orange Hawaiian shirt and a pair of dark blue jeans.
“Good evening, fellow freshman cuties,” Mina said before gesturing to her hand to her own company, introducing them respectively. “This is Fred, and this is Jesse.”
The two boys smiled and nodded in greeting.
“Mina’s brother actually used to be in the fraternity that’s throwing the party we’re going to tonight before he graduated last year.” Kristen explained to your group.
“Yeah, Fred here is a friend of my brother’s. He was the one who told me about the party.” Mina added.
“Oh, that was really nice of you.” Astrid said, giving Fred a polite smile. He smiled back, not before eyeing her keenly up and down.
“Thought I’d introduce Mina to college life the proper way.” Fred replied cockily, patting Mina hard on the back in a brotherly fashion. Mina rolled her eyes.
“Let’s head out, chicas!” Kristen announced, beckoning your large group towards and out the front doors.
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The trip to the Sigma Eta frat house wasn’t very long, but it felt like it to you at the beginning. Tara had broken off from your side when she was able to garner enough courage and nervously converse with Astrid, who was chatting back animatedly while ignoring Fred’s futile attempts to flirt with her. Kristen and Mina were enthusiastically catching up with each other, and Rebecca, who noticed Sidney’s shy and reserved demeanour, began kindly engaging her in a conversation to help her open up and get to know her. This left you to yourself for a while.
You were excited to be branching out socially and making friends, but it was difficult not to feel like you were out of your league in this rather abundant group of acquaintances. Being accustomed to smaller circles of friends and having gone through a recent ordeal with former friends, you weren’t quite sure how to politely insert yourself without seeming like a burden or nuisance.
The other guy Mina had brought along, Jesse, seemed to notice your silent predicament. He was a tall, muscular Asian man who had jet-black hair and kind eyes. You and your friends were approaching a nearby bus stop when he first spoke to you.
“So, this is your first real party, huh?”
You almost jumped, surprised that someone was speaking to you.
“Oh! Umm, yeah,” You responded sheepishly. “Is it really that obvious?”
“A little, but it’s alright,” He chuckled. “I’m Jesse, by the way. What was your name again?”
You smiled meekly as you introduced yourself.
“I’ll be sure to remember that.” He said with a friendly, assuring grin.
You weren’t sure what it was about this guy Jesse, what it was about him that made you like him instinctively. Men generally made you feel uncomfortable, and you almost never had any guy friends. But something in your gut was telling you that he was genuine, someone you could trust.
“So do you go to these kinds of frat parties a lot?” You asked in an attempt to be social.
“Sometimes,” Jesse replied. “Don’t really like this specific frat we’re going to, but I’m supposed to be helping this friend of mine link up with some guy who’ll be there. Do you smoke pot?”
“Why do you ask? Are you a cop?” You joked.
“Oh, absolutely. That is precisely why I am tagging along with a bunch of underage freshmen to a booze-filled shitty, frat party as someone who is also currently underage.” He chuckled.
You smiled at him.
“Yeah, I smoke,” You eventually replied. “I don’t really have a solid plug out here just yet though.”
“Well, my friend is a dealer and the guy we’re meeting up with tonight actually grows nearby, so we’re gonna see if my friend can work with him. She needs to procure some more fresh ‘merchandise’ or whatever.” He said, making air quotes upon saying the word ‘merchandise.’ “If you’re looking for a regular plug, I can introduce you to her later.”
“That’d be perfect, honestly,” You replied. “Don’t know how I’ll be able to get through freshman year of college without the influence of drugs.”
“Trust me, I get it,” Jesse said. “I had to make do with second-rate dealers as a freshman last year ‘cause my old dealer back home is obviously far away. Everyone around here either charges way too much or their shit is completely dry and weak.”
“Damn,” You replied. “But you think your friend’s got better connections?”
“Well, we’re going to see. But she’s real great about finding good strains and shit. Hopefully, things work out tonight.”
“I hope so too. I don’t wanna try and find another dealer out here, and then it turns out they’re creepy or something. And I trust you and your faith in your friend.”
“Yeah?” Jesse said curiously. “That’s very nice of you.”
You shrugged and gave him a warm smile.
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The rest of the trip to the Sigma Eta house was much more enjoyable now that you seemed to find a friend in Jesse. You clicked instantly with him: discussing where you were both from, what your majors were, what there was to do around and outside of the campus. He even gave you tips on how to navigate college as a freshman, having gone through it himself already the previous year. It comforted you that this person you’d just met already seemed adamant about looking out for you in a friendly, platonic manner.
As your group walked down the sidewalk that led to multiple houses where other college students resided, you spotted bright, strobing lights coming from a house towards the end of the street. The sounds of loud party music and boisterous chatter grew louder the further down you ventured. You finally came up to a house where several cars were haphazardly and crookedly parked out front and an assortment of other college kids loitered around the porch, most holding red solo cups filled to the brim.
Before you all stepped foot onto the front porch of the house, Astrid suddenly stopped and turned around to face the whole group.
“Hey, can we take a quick pic of all of us attending our first-ever college party? I wanna capture the memory of getting fucked up with my new dorm besties!” She gushed excitedly.
“You know, this actually isn’t my first college party.” Kristen chuckled, but Mina nudged her in the ribs.
“You know what she means, you killjoy. Come on, let’s all take a selfie!”
All the girls gathered together and began to link arms or embrace each other around the waist or drape their arms over each other’s shoulders. You turned towards Jesse, who was texting rapidly on his phone.
“So, selfie time?” You asked him.
“Nah, you guys go ahead. I think I’m gonna go find my friend inside ‘cause I’m pretty sure she’s here already. Plus I don’t wanna get in the way of you and your friends.”
“You’re my friend too,” You asserted boldly. “Come here and get in the picture with us, new friend.”
Jesse flashed you a warm smile and relented without any further argument.
Astrid held up her phone at a 45-degree angle towards the starry, night sky, angling it so she could get the whole group in the frame (except for Fred, whom she made very little effort to include in the picture, him standing at the edge of the group and desperately trying to have his face captured as well). You and Jesse stood right next to each other, and you allowed yourself to put a hand behind his back in an almost half-hug. You let out a partly genuine smile as Astrid said “Cheese!” and snapped a few photos of your group. After she sent the pictures to you and the rest of the girls in a mass group text (which she then promptly named “Wilson Crew ❤️‍🔥” after the dorm you were all living in), you and your new friends finally ventured into the Sigma Eta frat house.
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The deafening noise of terrible EDM and the smell of sweat that filled the thick air was almost enough to make you regret coming out. But the rest of your group tittered in anticipation, so you feigned excitement as you all ventured further into the house.
You entered the dining room where a long, wooden table had been turned into a small, makeshift beer-pong court. There were several people gathered around it, whether as spectators or players. You watched as a girl in a ponytail whooped after she effortlessly bounced a ping-pong ball onto the table and into a red solo cup on her opponent’s side. Several bystanders cheered in response as a frat guy on the other side of the table cursed in jest and promptly chugged from the cup.
“Dina!” Astrid mused excitedly, approaching the girl. She gave her a tight hug, which the girl named Dina affectionately returned.
Dina was an incredibly pretty girl with tan skin and black, wavy hair. Beneath thick, dark eyebrows were a pair of beautiful brown eyes that looked extremely warm and welcoming. Being Astrid’s roommate, it’d have been an obvious guess that she was a freshman too like the rest of you. But she exuded this air of boldness and spunk that made it seem like she was a vetted college student. You noticed that several onlookers, mostly men, had been eyeing her shiftily and curiously.
“I thought you said you weren’t coming!” Astrid scolded her playfully.
“Well, I honestly wasn’t, but a friend of mine had been trying to persuade me to come and—” Dina began before breaking off suddenly.
Her eyes had wandered towards your group of friends and fell on Jesse who was standing right next to you. The wide smile on her face faltered as her animated expression turned into one of shocked recognition. You turned towards Jesse who had suddenly gone rigid and stone-faced. You looked back at the girl Dina who blinked back to reality and began to stutter.
“I-I’m g-gonna catch up with you later, okay?” She said to Astrid before making her way towards the back of the house.
“Ah, shit,” You heard Jesse mutter under his breath. “Goddamn it.”
“You know her?” You questioned him.
“That… was my ex-girlfriend Dina. Childhood and high school sweetheart.” He explained.
“Oh, shit.” You uttered.
“Hey, I’m… I’m gonna be right back, okay?” He said to you before quickly heading towards the direction that Dina had gone in.
You watched as he left you behind with your friends who began to gossip amongst themselves curiously about the exchange that had just occurred.
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You’d been standing in the kitchen by yourself for the past five minutes, attempting to finish a drink in your hand that you’d reluctantly poured from an orange cooler on the counter. After they’d downed a couple of shots, the rest of the girls had tried to convince you to come to the basement where the dancing was primarily taking place. You declined and said that you needed a minute or two, promising you’d find them later. Though it was still relatively early in the evening, you were already feeling overwhelmed and overstimulated. You’d been faking plenty of smiles and forcing tight-lipped laughter all night; it was getting more tiring to feign excitement, especially now that the new friend you’d made tonight had not made a reappearance since quickly running after his ex-girlfriend.
Sighing, you refilled your red solo cup with the same unknown alcoholic contents from the cooler. You weren’t particularly enjoying the drink, completely confused as to what it was in the first place, but it was at least giving you something to do. As you continued to sip from your cup, you decided to venture towards the backyard where you figured Jesse had walked off.
Squinting past the darkness illuminated by the moonlight and the strobing lights peeking through the house’s windows, you scanned the numerous figures occupying the grassy lawn. You eventually spotted Jesse’s tall, dark silhouette after a minute or two, seeing that he was in a seemingly heated discussion with the pretty girl Dina. Deciding that this was a lover’s quarrel that you probably shouldn’t get in between, you find your tired, aching feet take you back inside the house.
You felt the temperature change back from brisk chilliness to throbbing heat from the pheromones in the musky air. Unsure of where to go, you walked back to the kitchen where you found a couple pressed up against each other in the spot you previously occupied. You grimaced at their pre-coital positioning and how they seemed to be swallowing each other’s faces before retreating from the room. Having no interest in watching the new round of beer-pong that several people had started again in the dining room, you settled for finding sanctuary elsewhere.
Finding an empty spot on a wall in the living room, you leaned up against it and took a generous sip from your cup. Though you didn’t have high expectations beforehand, the night was still going quite poorly. You cursed yourself silently for not having a sufficient social battery to socialize with your friends at the party nor enough courage to endure your overwhelming surroundings. You were contemplating whether you should rejoin the group after all in their close-quartered gyrating in the basement when you suddenly felt an invisible pull from across the room that called to you and compelled your head to instinctively turn in its direction.
Your eyes simultaneously met a pair of ocean green ones. The sounds of terrible music and overlapping chitchat immediately vanished when you saw her. You watched as her eyes scanned your face just as you scanned hers. The handsome stranger began to look you up and down before the left corner of her lips turned up in a crooked smile. Your cheeks burned in bashfulness and you tore your eyes away from her to stare at the ground and take another sip from your drink.
You felt your throat close up, your breathing hitch, and your entire body going up in flames. It felt as if someone had shot you through the chest with an arrow, aiming for and perfectly hitting where your heart was located. You felt utterly bare and naked in front of all these strangers, suddenly prey to a strange emotion that felt completely foreign to you. It was intoxicating, like you were completely wonderstruck within seconds of being in this stranger’s presence.
When you eventually felt her eyes wander elsewhere, you dared glance at her once more. She was incredibly handsome: her auburn hair partly tied up in a bun, cheeks adorned with freckles as if an angel had hand-painted them itself, broad shoulders that suggested a muscular frame underneath an old, brown motorcycle jacket she was wearing. She was sitting on this ratty old couch, manspreading in the middle as she noncommittally nodded at the people standing beside her. Her slender, long fingers were expertly wrapping a few rolling papers on the table in front of her. As she brought a joint up to her lips to lick it closed, her eyes flicked up once again to look at you. Embarrassed that you were caught shamelessly staring, you quickly focused your gaze in a different direction. From the corner of your eyes, you could see her chuckling.
The girl muttered something to her nearby companions before making her way across the room to you. Your drumming heartbeat echoed each of her steps, getting louder and louder in your chest the closer she got. You didn’t allow yourself to look her way again until she was right in front of you.
“Hey.” She said, voice rough and husky.
“Hi.” You responded, trying not to sound too flustered over this extremely attractive stranger approaching you to engage in conversation.
“You all alone tonight?” She asked.
“Not exactly,” You responded truthfully. “My friends are around here somewhere.”
“Oh?” She said, cocking her head slightly to the side as she crossed her arms.
“Yeah. I think downstairs, humping and gyrating with everyone else.” You joked.
She chuckled.
“Not your type of thing?”
“Not really,” You said. “I wasn’t in the mood tonight to get felt up by some horny frat guy trying to shove his limp-dick boner up against my ass.”
The girl let out a genuine laugh accompanied by a toothy grin.
“You’re funny.” She commented. You returned her smile with one of your own.
“Wanna come sit on the couch?” She asked. “You honestly look like you’re about to collapse at any second.”
“Yeah, it wasn’t really the best idea to wear a really nice pair of high heels to some crappy fraternity party.”
“Well, hey, they look good on you, so not a total loss.”
“Yeah?” You questioned, lifting an eyebrow.
“Yeah,” She smirked. “Anyway, come sit with me on this ugly ass couch. I promise I won’t try to shove my dick up your ass or anything.”
“Aww, you’re not? I was going to say yes, but if you’re not gonna shove your dick up my ass...” You teased boldly.
Even under the dim lights of the party, you thought you saw traces of pink appear underneath her freckles as she smiled. You felt your own cheeks burning.
“Come on, pretty girl.” She chuckled, leading you towards the sofa.
She sat back down in the middle but didn’t manspread this time to make room for you to sit comfortably next to her. Her body faced towards your direction, indicating to her companions that she was disinterested in any further conversation with them. Both your hands gripped onto your red solo cup tightly like it was your life-saving anchor. Your body tensed up from being so close to this handsome stranger whose name you didn’t even know yet.
Almost as if she read your mind, she introduced herself.
“I’m Ellie.”
You smiled nervously as you gave her your name.
“So,” She began. “You a freshman too, huh?”
“Yeah,” You hummed. “First ever college party.”
“Oh?” She said, reaching for one of her joints on the table.
“Mhmm,” You respond. “Not really as exciting as people have been making it out to be.”
“What, you’re not impressed by the repulsive smell of jungle juice and shitty trap music and the giant, sweaty orgy going on in the basement?”
“Eww,” You giggled, scrunching up your nose in disgust. “No, I wouldn’t really say that I’m impressed, exactly.”
Ellie chuckled before offering you the joint she was holding.
“You smoke?”
“Yeah, I do. But are you sure? I don’t wanna waste your weed.”
“I never mind smoking out pretty girls for free every now and again.” Ellie shrugged.
You ignored the way your heart fluttered as you placed your cup down and took the joint from her. You ignored the sudden, electric spark when you felt her skin brush against yours. You ignored how her own breathing seemed to hitch at that same moment before she pulled away from you to grab her lighter from a front pocket of her motorcycle jacket.
You placed the joint in between your lips, trying not to think about the fact that Ellie’d just sealed it a minute or two ago with her tongue. Ellie cupped her left hand around the tip while her right hand flicked on the lighter. Your eyes wandered from the budding flame to her eyes, which were already watching you. Her stare caught you off-guard that you almost forgot to inhale. You leaned away from her, both to blow the smoke in a different direction and to nervously catch your breath from how intimately close she was to you.
“So?” She inquired, reclining back and throwing her arm behind you on the back of the couch.
“Mm?” You hummed in question as you took another puff of the joint.
“How do you like the j?”
“Hmm,” You say after releasing another breath of smoke. “It’s… fine.”
“Just fine?” She asked, looking playfully offended.
“What!” You said, giggling and handing her back the joint. “It’s just a regular, old j! What else would you like me to say?”
“What, do you smoke some fancy ass weed with gold and diamonds and shit where you’re from?” Ellie chuckled.
“Sorry! I guess I’m just used to something very particular.”
“Oh, yeah?” She asked, cocking up an eyebrow, the one that you’d noticed had a slit right through it. “What do you mean by that exactly?”
“I usually lace my own js with lavender buds,” You explained. “Makes it taste better, in my opinion, and it helps me relax.”
“Really? Lavender, huh? I’ve never heard of someone doing that before.”
“A little trick I learned from an ex-girlfriend.” You clarified, pretending that you didn’t throw in that last word on purpose.
“That so?” She replied. You could have sworn that she had moved slightly closer the moment you mentioned having an ex-girlfriend.
“Mhmm. Lavender’s my favourite, but I’ve tried lacing them with other herbs and plants too.”
“Yeah? Like what?”
“I’ve done rose petals and passionflowers before. Gives them a much better flavour. Sage is good too if you wanna destress and all. And apparently, hibiscus and jasmine are, well…” Your sentence is cut short by a slightly drunken giggle emerging from your lips.
“Are what?” Ellie prompted you.
“Umm, they’re good too.”
“Good for what, exactly?”
You handed the joint back to her before responding.
“I heard that they’re supposedly good aphrodisiacs.” You nearly whispered.
Ellie smiled slyly, taking the joint back without breaking eye contact.
“Interesting” is all she says before taking a huge puff.
Whether it was the mysterious alcohol finally kicking in or the sudden presence of marijuana in your system, you felt a surge of sudden confidence flood your senses. You wanted to impress this strange girl, you wanted her to like you. And yet somehow, it feels almost as if you’d already met before.
“By the way,” Ellie began. “I really love your eye makeup. You did it yourself?”
“Thanks,” You smiled. “Yeah, I did.”
“That’s seriously fucking impressive. I’ve never been into makeup and girly shit like that, but I know it must take a fuck ton of talent to do it.”
“Nah,” You waved off before picking up your red solo cup from the table and drinking from it. “It’s really not that hard to learn. I taught myself how to do it for the most part.”
“That’s even more fucking impressive.” She stated simply. You gave her a sheepish smile before uttering another quiet thanks.
Before either of you could speak again, the guy leaning against the arm of the couch next to Ellie turned towards her.
“Yo, Williams, Chang here yet?” He asked.
“Really don’t know, man. He said he would be.”
“Damn. Call him or something.”
“Call him yourself. I’m not his mother.”
The guy tsked in irritation before returning to a conversation with his companions.
“Nice friends you got there.” You said out loud without thinking.
“We just got a mutual friend in common, that’s all,” Ellie replied, shrugging and taking another puff. “My best friend knows like, half the people who go to this school.”
You nodded in acknowledgement as she continued.
“Most people are usually disappointed that I’m not as nice as him.”
“You’re not?”
“Nah, apparently I’m ‘antagonistic’ and ‘mean’ and just really fucking rude.” She chuckled.
“Doesn’t seem like that to me.” You commented.
“Well, we just met,” She smirked. “Just wait a little while.”
“What, are you planning on being really mean to me in the future, Ellie?” You quipped.
She shrugged and you chuckled.
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Both immensely absorbed in your engaging and private conversation, you weren’t quite sure exactly how long you and Ellie were sitting in that dirty living room on that ratty, old couch. You talked about the classes and professors you had in common, bonded over your shared love of music and the instruments you both played, laughed at all of the dumb and silly jokes she made.
At one point in the night, Tara emerged from the basement, all buzzed and sweaty. She scanned the living room, having been worried that she nor none of the rest of your friends had seen you since you’d all first arrived at the house. Upon spotting you sitting so intimately to Ellie, her whispering something in your ear and you boisterously laughing, Tara smiled and retreated back to the basement.
Ellie was beginning to tell you about her hometown when your conversation was suddenly interrupted by a familiar voice.
“Hey, yo, El!” You heard Jesse say from behind you.
You turned around to see a jovial expression on his face that didn’t quite meet his serious eyes. He was smiling in greeting, but it seemed like whatever occurred in the private conversation he had with the girl Dina rattled him in some way.
“Yo, Jess,” Ellie said, waving him over. “Been wondering where the fuck your ass has been this whole time, man.”
“Ahh, well, I kind of… got detained by D…” He admitted as he approached the couch before spotting you sitting next to Ellie. “Oh, shit! You guys know each other?”
“What, you don’t know that we’re lifelong best friends?” Ellie said, winking at you. You turned away as you bit your lip, attempting to hide the smile on your face and the heat rising to your cheeks.
“Now, hang on, I thought we were lifelong best friends?” Jesse gasped playfully, putting one hand on his hip and gesturing between you and him mockingly.
“Sorry dude, I claimed her already.” Ellie said, smirking.
You tried to ignore Jesse’s mumble of “greedy whore” towards Ellie in between loud, fake coughs.
“Anyway, you saw D? Are you okay?” Ellie said, her tone more serious now.
“I mean, I guess,” Jesse sighed. “Thought she wasn’t tagging along tonight, but I guess she did.”
“Sorry, man, I really thought you knew.”
“It’s cool. I was gonna end up seeing her at some point. Might wanna check up on her, though.”
“She okay?”
“I think so, but you know how she can be.”
“Where’d she run off to know?”
“I think she said that she was gonna go hang out with her roommate or something for the rest of the night.”
“I’ll text her, see where she is.”
“Oh, umm,” You said, awkwardly speaking up. “My friend Astrid is her roommate, so I think your friend Dina went downstairs to the basement.”
Both Ellie and Jesse looked slightly taken aback at your short degree of separation.
“Sorry,” You apologized as you looked down at your hands in embarrassment. “I didn’t mean to insert myself.”
“Hey,” Ellie assured, nudging your shoulder with hers. “Didn’t I just say that we’re lifelong best friends?”
You looked up at her and smiled with appreciation at her thoughtfulness.
Ellie, realizing they’d been leaving you out of their conversation, quickly filled in the blanks.
“Our other lifelong best friend Dina got dumped by this asshole joker right here a little while back. It was a bit of a messy break-up.”
“I haven’t always been the smooth and suave man that you see before you today.” Jesse quipped.
“Never have been, dumbass.” Ellie added. Jesse gave her a scowl, which she mockingly returned.
“Anyway,” She continued. “Now I’ve been stuck being the middle man for the past year or so ‘cause these two clowns don’t know how to talk about their motherfucking feelings.”
You chuckled at Ellie’s choice of words.
“I’m sure she’s okay if she’s with your friend, though. This Astrid girl nice?” Ellie inquired.
“Oh, she’s the absolute sweetest.” You affirmed.
“Well, I trust your judgment. I’ll give her some time and check up on her after.” Ellie concluded, giving you a half-smile.
It was so curious how these people you’d known only for a few hours seemed to somehow trust you so intimately and almost blindly. Besides your cousin Rafael who’s known you since birth, you’d never clicked so well with anyone else in your life. You felt a quiet warmth in your chest, feeling as if you had been soulmates with these people in a past life.
“Might as well,” Jesse said, looking down at his buzzing phone. “Eugene’s contact said he’s here. He’s out back if you still wanna talk to him.”
You suddenly felt naive, not realizing sooner that Ellie was the dealer friend Jesse had been talking to you about earlier in the evening. Her previous rolling of papers and multiple joints should have been a dead giveaway, but you were far too mesmerized by Ellie and her charm and her ocean green eyes to give much notice to your current surroundings.
“Ah, shit, I totally forgot,” Ellie cursed.
She looked at you.
“Umm, do you wanna come with? It’ll probably be boring as shit, but—”
“No, no, it’s okay,” You said, waving her off. “It sounds pretty important. Jesse was telling me earlier that you needed to meet up with him.”
Ellie turned towards him, an annoyed look on her face.
“Now, why are you going around telling my business to everyone?” She asked him.
“It’s fun.” Jesse joked. Ellie rolled her eyes.
“If, uh, you wanna stick around, this probably won’t take long. I’ll see you after?” She said guiltily. You gave her a soft smile.
“Ellie, please go ahead. I’m a big girl; I can be left alone for two seconds.”
She chuckled at your words as she stood up from her seat next to you, not before brushing her hand and her knee against yours. You wondered silently if she did so by accident.
“See you in a bit, pretty girl.” Ellie said, winking at you.
You watched as she and Jesse walked off towards the backyard of the house. Once they were out of sight, you sighed quietly.
You realized that you were all alone tonight once again, this time through no fault of your own. Not knowing what else to do, you leaned back into the sagging sofa and pulled out your phone from a pocket of your skirt. As you waited for your companions to return, you scrolled mindlessly through different social media outlets for a while until your entertainment was exhausted and eventually settled on Instagram. After a couple of minutes of looking through your friends’ stories and posts, sending likes and comments every now and again, you see something that suddenly makes your stomach drop.
Still not fully over the results of the disastrous break-up with your high school ex-girlfriend, you hadn’t unfollowed or blocked her on social media just yet. You realized in the moment what a grave mistake that was when you came across a post with several photos of her and all your former friends at some party with a couple of unknown people included. Hot tears formed in your eyes when, while swiping through the many images, you encountered one picture with your ex-girlfriend’s arms wrapped around a strange girl you didn’t recognize. Their physical intimacy and stances suggested something more than just friendship.
You suddenly felt the urge to throw up and you immediately rose from your seat in search of a nearby bathroom. Eventually, you came across a small one towards the front of the house and wrenched it open, feeling lucky that it was presently unoccupied. Leaning over the grimy sink, the feeling of nausea subdued from what you figured was a result of separating yourself from the overstimulation of the party. Still, your hands and neck felt clammy. You felt as if you couldn’t breathe, no matter how hard you inhaled and exhaled.
You raised your head up to look at yourself in the murky mirror. Thick tears threatened to fall from the corners of your eyes. Pieces of hair stuck to your forehead with nervous sweat. Lips were trembling and shakingly releasing laboured breaths.
Leaving your past behind was not as simple as you believed it could be. The past several months had been a personal hell for you, having been abandoned to be lonely and companionless by people you loved. After a messy break-up with someone who suddenly broke your heart, a result of two young, dumb kids attempting to be much more mature than they actually were, your entire friend group ended up choosing her in the aftermath. It left you completely grief-stricken and betrayed, not expecting the people you believed cared for you to cast you aside so quickly and easily.
You’d spent the entire summer after graduating high school healing and recovering from such a loss, and you’d genuinely believed that you came to your new school fully mended. But as you stood in front of a fogged-up mirror in a dingy frat house bathroom, it seemed as if you hadn’t fully overcome your emotional wounds like you thought.
You were dabbing the soggy sweat off your moist forehead when someone suddenly knocked on the bathroom door, causing you to jump.
“Oh, umm, someone’s in here!” You quickly exclaimed. The sound of the same voice you’d been listening to all evening calling out your name from behind the door had you grip the edges of the sink and freeze in place.
“Y-yeah?” You asked falteringly.
“Hey, uhh, i-it’s Ellie.”
“Oh!” You said in surprise. “Hi! Umm, I-I’ll be out in a minute!”
“Hey, uhh, are you okay?” Ellie said after a beat or two.
“Y-yeah, I’m fine!” You cried out unconvincingly.
“Can… can I come in?” She asked hesitantly.
“Oh! Umm—”
“It’s okay if you don’t want me to! If you need space—”
“No, no!” You interrupted.
You took a deep breath, threw out the damp tissue you still held in your hand, and carefully opened the door to reveal Ellie with a concerned look on her face.
“It’s a bit of a tight fit, but, uhh…” You said, stepping aside to let her in.
You backed up to make space for her and sat on the edge of the shabby-looking tub as Ellie closed the bathroom door behind her before leaning her back against it.
“How’d you know where to find me?” You inquired.
“Someone saw you come in here.” She explained.
“Oh” was all you could say in return.
There were several moments of complete silence, neither of you knowing how to start or what to say. It was you who eventually broke it out of nervousness.
“So, umm, how did it go with that guy you were talking to?” You asked awkwardly.
“Oh, uhh, good. At least, I think so. Gave me a pretty good deal and all.” Ellie replied.
You nodded in response.
“So, hey, uhh, if you need a new plug out here…” She pointed a pair of finger guns at you, to which you half-heartedly chuckled.
“Sorry,” She apologized. “I’m not really as smooth as I would like to think.”
“Don’t worry, I still think you’re plenty charming. Dorky, but charming.” You gave her a soft, affectionate smile that she returned as you saw her turn slightly pink underneath her numerous freckles.
“So, uhh, are you okay? I don’t mean to pry or anything, and you don’t need to say anything if you don’t want to—” She began to ramble.
“Ellie,” You said, chuckling. “It’s alright. I don’t mind, and you’re not prying.”
She let out a quiet sigh of relief.
“Just a bunch of bullshit in regards to my ex,” You explained. “Thought I was past it all, but…”
Ellie nodded in understanding.
“Still not over her?”
“Oh, god, no, no, I’m completely over her,” You clarified quickly. “But dealing with the outcome of it all… isn’t necessarily fun.”
“Yeah,” Ellie agreed. “I completely get it.”
You looked up at her with an expression of gratitude.
“Man, this lesbian shit is real fucking messy and complicated, huh?” She quipped in an attempt to lighten the mood. You couldn’t help but giggle at her joke.
“How’d you know that I wasn’t okay?” You asked her after a beat or two.
“The people I was with earlier said that the pretty girl I was talking to suddenly looked stressed and ran to the bathroom.” Ellie explained, shrugging. You attempted to hide your bashful smile as you felt your cheeks go hot again.
“Wanna get out of this disgusting bathroom and go smoke some more?” She asked.
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You and Ellie were passing another joint back and forth again several feet away from the Sigma Eta frat house. You’d both taken shelter underneath a nearby tree, listening to the muffled bass drops of yet another bad EDM song currently playing from the frat house. The weed was calming your nerves down slightly, but you had a gut feeling that it was Ellie’s presence that was the actual cause of your peace of mind.
“Damn, I really wanna try your lavender-laced trick now.” Ellie said after taking a hit of the joint.
“I mean, it’s not really my trick. It was my ex’s idea.” You chuckled dryly as you watched her blow the smoke up towards the night sky.
“Oh, fuck that shit. I don’t know her and I know you, so it’s your recipe.” She disagreed. You laughed graciously at her argument.
“Can I ask what happened?” Ellie began, handing the joint to you. “Like, did the bitch suddenly call or text you, or…”
“Nah,” You said after a puff. “She posted something on Instagram and, I don’t know, I guess seeing evidence of her existence triggered something in me.”
“Wait, you don’t have her blocked?”
“No…” You admitted sheepishly. “I still follow her and everything…”
“What!!” Ellie exclaimed. “Why?!”
“I don’t know!” You laughed at her immediate indignation. “I just could never get myself to actually do it!”
“Alright, no more free weed for you!” Ellie proclaimed, swiftly snatching the joint out of your fingertips.
“Noooo!” You whined.
“You’re on a time-out for still keeping your stupid ex-girlfriend in your life in some kind of way!”
“Look, I like to lurk sometimes! I can’t do that if I have her blocked!” You protested, attempting to take the joint back from her.
“Oh, now you’re definitely not getting any more free weed!” Ellie said, holding the joint up and away from your reach.
“How else am I supposed to be a miserable, pathetic lesbian who needs to be sad and tragic if you don’t let me!!” You said, giving up and crossing your arms over your chest in a huff.
“Pretty girls like you should be spending their freshman year in college in their drunken whore eras, not in an ‘I’m gonna sulk over my worthless ex the whole time’ era!”
“Ugh. Yeah, I know, I know,” You sighed. “But that all sounds like so much work!”
“Alright, give me your phone.” Ellie said suddenly.
“What?” You asked, surprised. “Why?”
“Just give me!” She insisted, holding her free hand out.
You pulled out your phone from one of your skirt’s pockets and handed it over to her, eyeing her suspiciously.
“What are you up to, Ellie?” You inquired of her.
“Just hold this!” She replied, handing you the joint. “But no smoking!”
“Yes, sir!” You said with a salute before taking a quick puff.
Ellie rolled her eyes, chuckled, and had you unlock your phone before taking it back to open up your Instagram.
“Okay, what’s your ex’s name?”
“... why?” You asked skeptically.
“Just trust me!”
You squinted your eyes at her before reluctantly giving her your ex’s name and Instagram handle. As you took a generous hit of the joint, you leaned over and watched as Ellie went to your ex’s profile and blocked her.
“Ellie!!” You protested.
“This is for your own good!” She exclaimed.
“Oh god,” You laughed. “Yeah, yeah, maybe.”
“Definitely.” She asserted before typing another handle into your Instagram search bar.
“What are you doing now?” You asked dubiously.
“Replacing your ex with a hotter, much cooler person.” She explained simply before handing your phone back and taking the joint out of your hand.
You looked at your screen to see Ellie’s Instagram profile and realized she’d followed herself through your account.
“Wow. Dinosaur nerd, huh?” You said, noticing one of her posts was of her posing geekily next to a dinosaur skeleton display in some museum.
“Shut up.” She chuckled before hitting the joint.
“Well, are you gonna follow me back?” You asked.
“I don’t know, I don’t really know you that well.” Ellie shrugged.
“You dick!” You scoffed, to which she laughed. “What happened to us being lifelong best friends?”
“Calm down, calm down,” She chuckled, holding the joint between her teeth and already pulling out her phone. “Bossy.”
You felt your phone buzz with a new notification from Instagram.
“There you go,” She said, putting her phone back in her pocket. “Now we’re official lifelong besties.”
You laughed. Your affection for this incredibly handsome and charming girl that you had just met tonight was growing more and more by the second. Every time she laughed at a joke you’d make or stared at your lips a little too long or brushed her skin against yours, you wondered if you were imagining it or if she had been feeling the same spark too.
“Hey, umm,” You began. “Thank you for that.”
“Don’t have to thank me. I’m sure you would have done it eventually. At least, I hope so.” She chuckled at the last part.
“Oh, I don’t know. I honestly hold on to shit like that forever. I would have probably stayed following her ‘til I was I was fifty.”
Ellie laughed.
For the next few minutes, you told her all about the sorry tale of the break-up between you and your ex. As you and Ellie went through and finished yet another joint, she listened to you intently while she leaned against the tree you’d been standing next to. She didn’t interrupt you, aside from an occasional supportive comment or two, intent on letting you rant your pent-up frustrations out.
You hadn’t opened up to anyone else about this, apart from your cousin Rafael. It felt like you had nobody else left to trust your heart with. And yet, there was something so different and familiar about Ellie that made you feel so at home, so comfortable confiding such intimate thoughts and experiences. She happily entertained you as you confessed to her the way you’d never done before with anyone else, her face looking so sympathetic and gentle as she watched you ramble.
“Oh my fucking god,” You eventually said after a while. “I can’t believe I’ve been babbling nonstop about my bullshit, I am so sorry, I—”
You buried your face in your hands in embarrassment.
“Hey, no, no,” Ellie interrupted, pulling your hands away from your face. “None of that. Don’t apologize, please. It’s shit that you obviously have needed to get off your chest for a long time now. I don’t mind listening at all.”
“Okay, but I’m a total stranger who just trauma dumped on you like a dumbass—”
“Alright, no, you are not a dumbass,” Ellie insisted. “And lifelong best friends, remember?”
She gave you a soft smile and began to rub her thumbs against your palms, her warm touch making you tremble.
“Oh, hey, you’re shivering, here.” Ellie said, taking off her motorcycle jacket and placing it around your shoulders.
“Oh,” You said, “T-thanks, Ellie.”
“Looks really good on you.” She commented, smiling. You felt your cheeks go hot again.
“It-it’s very nice.” You said.
“Yeah, it’s my dad’s old jacket. He gave it to me when I was around 14. He used to be a delinquent and was part of some gang or something when he was younger. Rode motorcycles a lot or some shit like that. I’ll tell you more about it one of these days.”
“Oh, yeah?”
“Yeah.”
Ellie seemed to realize how close she was to your face and how intimately she was holding you. A little sheepish, she walked back a few steps to lean against the tree. She crossed her arms against her chest and, her arms now uncovered, you noticed a large tattoo covering her right forearm.
“I like your tattoo,” You commented. “What is it?”
“Oh,” She said, glancing down at her arm. “It’s a moth with some ferns around it.”
“It’s absolutely gorgeous.”
“Thanks. My ex-girlfriend did the tattoo itself, but I created the design.”
“Woah, really?”
“Yeah.” Ellie said, chuckling at your admiration.
“I know you were telling me earlier that you like to draw, but that really is something.”
“It is?” Ellie replied. You could see her blushing even under the dim glow of the moonlight.
“You’re really talented, Ellie.”
“Nah. I mean, my ex-girlfriend Cat, she did a lot of work making it look better and shit.”
“Still, it’s very impressive.” You insisted. “Do you think— Can I…?”
You extended a hesitant hand out towards her tattooed arm. She smiled warmly as she offered it to you.
“Yeah, go ahead.”
You lifted your outreached hand to trace your fingertips across the multiple leaves decorating her skin. You stared at the intricate design of the Death’s-head hawkmoth that was perched atop the ferns.
“It really suits you.” You said.
“You think so?”
“I do.”
As you continued to stroke Ellie’s tattoo, you felt electricity once again run between you two. You looked up at her to see her ocean green eyes staring at you. You’d never seen anyone look at you that way, not even your ex-girlfriend. You tried to decipher her expression when the moment was suddenly interrupted by your name being called coming from the direction of the frat house.
“There you are!” Tara exclaimed, half-jogging towards you.
“Oh, hey, Tara.” You greeted her, pulling your hands away from Ellie.
“Been looking for you everywhere.” Tara said.
“Sorry, the party was getting a little too much for me. Needed a breather.” You apologized before gesturing towards your companion. “This is Ellie, by the way. She’s Jesse’s roommate.”
“Oh, hey, nice to meet you, man.” Tara said, nodding towards her in greeting. Ellie replied with a nod of her own.
“This is Tara, my roommate.” You gestured to Tara this time.
“Nice to meet you too, dude.” Ellie repeated back to her.
“So, uhh,” Tara began. “Half the group is completely wasted, and Astrid really wants to get rid of that guy Fred who has not stopped trying to grope her all night.”
“Oh, gross. Is she alright?”
“Yeah, she’s okay. But we’re gonna order an Uber and we’re about to head home in a sec. Did you wanna come with or…”
“Oh, umm…” You turned towards Ellie.
“Go on,” Ellie replied, smiling. “I think I’m gonna go find my friend Dina.”
“I’m gonna go gather up the girls.” Tara said, pointing a thumb towards the house. “Nice to meet you again!”
“You too, man.” Ellie said as you both watched Tara walk off.
“Go ahead,” Ellie said, head motioning after Tara. “Go help your friends.”
“Are-are you sure?” You said hesitantly.
“Here, give me your phone again.” She said, holding her hand out. This time, you didn’t hesitate and unlocked it before handing it to her.
You watched as Ellie quickly typed for a few moments before placing it back in your hand. Glancing at the screen, you saw that she’d texted a new contact she’d named “Ellie 😛” with the message “hey sexy” accompanied by a winking emoji.
“Oh my god, you’re annoying.” You said, laughing.
“What, you don’t think I’m sexy?” She replied, grinning.
“Goodbye, Ellie.” You chuckled, walking away a couple of steps before suddenly stopping in your tracks.
“Oh, wait, your jacket—” You said, beginning to shrug off her old motorcycle jacket.
“No, go ahead and keep it.” She interrupted, securing it back onto your shoulders.
“Are you sure?” You asked.
“Gives you a good excuse to see my sexy ass later.” She smirked.
“Shut up,” You said, unable to hide a smile. “You are so annoying.”
“You love it.” She said, smirking once more.
As she adjusted the jacket onto you, you realized just how close she was again. You stared at her and she stared right back. There was a moment or two when you gazed into each other’s eyes, neither saying anything. You felt heat increasingly rising to your face when she suddenly brushed a piece of hair from your forehead.
You found yourself completely unwilling to leave this bubble that enclosed only you and Ellie. It was extraordinary how intimately absorbed you felt in this person you’d only seen for the first time today, how enchanted you felt by merely being in her presence. In just a few hours, she filled your mind completely with thoughts of her and only her. You prayed that this wasn’t a chance meeting but the beginning of something life-changing.
The moment was once again interrupted, this time by Jesse.
“Dude, I was—” Jesse began, but upon seeing what he’d walked in on, his sentence faltered. “Oh, shit, sorry—”
“It’s okay, Jesse,” You assured. “I gotta go, anyway.”
You turned back towards Ellie.
“I’ll, umm, see you soon?” You asked nervously.
“I hope so.” She replied, smiling softly.
You began to walk back towards the house, giving a quick goodbye to Jesse. Once you reached the front porch and before you walked through the door, you turned back to where Ellie and Jesse were standing beneath the tree.
You lifted your hand and waved at Ellie, which she returned with her own soft wave. The look on her face looked completely dazed and awestruck. You bit your lip in nervous anticipation, looking into her ocean green eyes one more time before walking into the house.
After a beat or two, Jesse finally spoke.
“Is she wearing Joel’s old jacket?”
“Shut the fuck up, Jesse.”
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author's notes:
i can’t believe this is finally out!! sorry for taking so long to update this, but hopefully how long this is will make up for the time ♡︎
the "barbie heterosexual" line is a reference to a line from the iconique movie "imagine me and you" :)
reader's little spiel to tara about her dating preference is just another little love letter of mine towards masc/butch/stud lesbians. just love y'all so much, you deserve the world.
fred is named after another jackson resident in the actual game (as i've probably mentioned before, all the character names in this fic are purposeful: either named after actual characters or named after people irl). i thought it was a silly little reference for him to go after astrid cause in the games, he's barely mentioned except at one point when it's seen he was paired up with astrid for patrol at one point. i enjoy my little easter eggs :)
the descriptions of most of reader’s friends are slightly based on the physical appearances of some of my irl friends :)
i’ve discovered that i really love making these flashback chapters hehe
like i said, i’m so sorry for taking forever to update this!! my life has been an absolute shit show lately (if you’ve been keeping up with my personal ramblings on here, you know by now lol). but the next few chapters have been basically mapped out already, so hopefully it won’t take me that long to update this with the next chapter ♡︎
taglist: @lonelyfooryouonly, @elliesinterlude, @sawaagyapong, @peppesgirl, @iconsoft, @maybeidohaveadhd, @ellieswifee, @valiantllamapersonpony-blog, @nil-eena, @echostinn
@uraesthete, @softbunlvr, @cherriesxinthespring, @amitycat, @thefishymissy, @yevheniiaaaa, @machetegirl109, @bertandfearnie, @ximtiredx, @efam
@elliesnumber1gf, @digit4lslut, @tayyyystan, @emothurman, @livvy-2000, @abigaillovestoread, @gold-dustwomxn, @liabadoobee, @yuckyfucky, @qtefolleunpez
@libr4sonsa, @venusluv3, @robinismywifee, @villainousbear, @ashlynnnnnnnn15, @scarlettadore, @vianna99, @g0n3girls, @totheblood, @embermdk
@awyunh, @kenz-ee, @marvelwomen-simp, @eleactric, @simpforellie, @omgidksblog, @anxiouso, @nyrastar, @lillysbigwilly, @hopeless-y
@elliesbabygirl, @alexpritch, @thestarsanctuary, @aethelwyneleigh27, @cass00x, @mulan-but-gay, @carmellie, @destielcore, @tfuuka, @elliewilliamsmissingfingerss
@sagestuffing, @ewwitsbella, @igoferalforelliewilliams, @miaelliesgfxoxo, @kissesforells, @elysiagyaru, @asteroidzzzn, @gay4jinx, @97cityy, @joliettes
@p1llowthoughtss, @ellieslegalwife, @aouiaa, @lez-zuha, @ineffablefics, @peepshake, @lil-elliesgf, @wex--12, @ccinnamongrl, @siriusblackrunmeover17
@whenlostinthedarkness, @elsbouquet
604 notes · View notes
veryace-ficrecs · 3 months
Text
Danny Phantom Gets Summoned Fic Recs
This list will include all ratings and tags, so read at your own discretion! :)
Ringback by kelpeigh (chitaqua) - Not Rated
“I think we’re on hold.” a soft voice hedges. Four hoods twist as the group looks to their youngest member. She continues, “This is just a ringback tone. Don’t you have one, Steph— uh, Shadowlux?” “You’re right.” The cloaked man next to her answers. “We’re totally on hold.” - A summoning au where Danny can only be summoned as Phantom, and anyone who tries when he's human has to wait until he happens to go ghost again.
Is This Just A Thing that Girls Do? by newdog14 - Rated T
“Yeah, and about that,” The Ghost King said, pinching the bridge of nose in frustration. “You found an archaic book of magic with a summoning spell for the Ghost King, who you believed to be evil, and then you used said spell to bring me here and bind me to answer questions, and you did this so you could ask me about a middle schooler’s crush?” “We also want to know what the secret of life is,” Cori said, crossing her arms defensively. “42,” he answered without hesitation.
after school summons by blueh - Rated T
"So this is the fabled Ghost King," the man says like he expected better. Danny feels he should almost be offended if it isn't for the tiny detail that these cultists—who summoned him by using salt and goat bones—assume he is the ghost king. "…Did you seriously confuse me with Pariah Dark?" The man pauses. "Pariah Dark?" "Yes! He's like fifteen feet tall, has a huge sword, is a pain in the ass, and has, like, an entire ghost army. I have, I dunno, pre-calc homework in my bag. We are not the same." Or: Danny accidentally gets summoned. He’s not happy about it.
AfterSchool Special: Psst! Summoners After You! by GothMoth - Rated G
How to piss off that weird kid at school: very rudely summon him, bombard him with questions like this is his fault, tell him he’d look better dead, and use this as an excuse to give him homework
Summoning by DP_Marvel94 - Rated T
When Jack and Maddie Fenton tried to summon the King of All Ghosts, the last thing they expected was the sudden appearance of a very familiar, very human boy wearing spaceship pajamas and with a toothbrush halfway to his mouth.
11:30 on a Tuesday by piece_of_pierce - Not Rated
Danny is home from school, recovering from a bad fight, and just trying to let himself heal. Then, Danny is standing in his classroom, in a summoning circle, in his PJ's. AKA: Why is Danny's class unsupervised and trying to summon a ghost at 11:30 on a Tuesday? Danny doesn't even care anymore.
Summoned To A Rude Awakening by Kimcat - Rated G
Dash tries to summon Phantom, it doesn't go very well. Danny just wants to sleep after everything hes been through.
48 notes · View notes
writing-blog-iguess · 11 months
Text
Online Matchup 6
Summery: Y/N gets texts from someone the last person they thought of. In doing so, learns a few things about their sister and who gave out their number.
Warning: swearing, fluff
Words: 3.4K
A/n: Feed back is always welcome, hope you enjoy!
Taglist: @xoxoyourdoll
ao3
Series master list
————
October 23
Y/n (6:30 am) I thought you said you weren’t going to give Conner my number?
Jason I did not
Y/N Then why is he yelling at me for dissing his writing It has been two weeks And he’s still upset about it It’s been three hours since he started texting me And he’s still not done Why is the sunshine boy up at three in the morning anyways? I haven’t answered yet
Jason What the fuck No I didn’t give him your number And he begged me for it Should have known something was up when he stopped asking
Y/N Who the fuck gave him my number?
Jason I don’t know
Y/N Whoever it is, they are dead.
Jason I’ll help But Conner isn’t that bad 
Y/N No But he hasn’t stopped being mad at me for what I said He won’t even let me get a word in
Jason He’ll stop, just wait
Y/n (7:30 am) Are you done?
Conner Nothing to say I see
Y/N It’s been a few years I’m not going to talk about that It’s stupid So why are you even talking about it?
Conner I’m offended
Y/N Then stop
Conner Why are you so mean?
Y/N Because we’re talking about something that happened in the past A past that I do not care for
Conner You were never this mean in high school What happened?
Y/N I moved away and became a different person Gotham has harden my soul Why do you care? We were never friends
Conner Yeah, but you’re my girlfriend’s sister I gotta at least try
Y/N … What?
Conner Ah shit She didn’t tell you?
Y/N W h a t 
Conner Pretend I didn’t say that
Y/N NO I CAN’T PRETEND WHAT DO YOU MEAN I'M YOUR GIRLFRIENDS SISTER?
Conner Your sister is going to kill me
Y/N CONNER KENT
Conner Has anyone ever told you how scary you can be?
Y/N Yes now answer the question
Conner I mean That’s pretty straight forward
Y/N HOW LONG HAVE YOU TWO BEEN DATING? AND AREN’T YOU LIKE ANCIENT
Conner I’LL HAVE YOU KNOW THAT I’M A FEW MONTHS OLDER THAN HER AND WE’RE BOTH LIKE TWO YEARS YOUNGER THEN YOU And like, almost a year
Y/N WHY DIDN’T SHE TELL ME?
Conner Something to do with her waiting for the right time
Y/N I’m offended
Conner Gonna have to take it up with her
Y/N I can’t, she’s in school Shouldn’t you be in class?
Conner Sick
Y/N That’s bullshit You don’t get sick
Conner I don’t have to explain myself to you You’re not my keeper
Y/N Nah, that’s my sister apparently 
Conner Not gonna let that go, are you?
Y/N Nope
Conner Shouldn't you be in class?
Y/N Not until three
Conner Be annoying somewhere else
Y/N Funny, I was just about to say the same thing to you How’d you get my number anyways?
Conner Oh would you look at that! I gotta go
Y/N Bitch
Y/N (8:10 am) HE’S DATING MY SISTER?
Jason You didn’t know?
Y/N NO YOU KNEW?
Jason I feel like this is a trap
Y/N It’s not, and I’m not mad if you did How long did you know?
Jason Um, couple of months I think They’ve been dating longer though
Y/N Almost a year apparently I’m so mad And I can’t even call her because she’s in school Son of a bitch
Jason Let me know how that conversation goes
Y/N (11:02 am) Cannot believe you’re dating Conner Kent
Ellie How the fuck do you know that?
Y/N I’m offended
Ellie Hey, you didn’t tell me you were talking to Jason
Y/N That’s different Whatever I have going on with Jason is new And I didn’t want to jinx it You’re dating Conner for close to a year I think that warrants telling your sister
Ellie It never came up?
Y/N Bull. Shit
Ellie You never liked Conner, I was afraid you wouldn’t approve
Y/N I have never said I disliked Conner I may have said he’s annoying sometimes and he’s too bright Hence why I call him sunshine boy
Ellie Do you approve though?
Y/N Does he make you happy?
Ellie Yes
Y/N Then I approve How’d that happen anyways?
Ellie Newspaper
Y/N I still can’t believe you joined the school paper
Ellie I love writing You did it
Y/N That’s because Kate made me I wasn’t there by choice
Ellie Right So, how’d you know?
Y/N Your boyfriend let it slip
Ellie What?
Y/N Which reminds me, did you give him my number
Ellie You know I’d never do that
Y/N Someone did, and he’s not telling me
Ellie Hold on a sec I’ll find out for you
Y/N Someone’s going to die I just don’t know who 
Ellie (12:15 pm) Try not to kill Conner, I really like him Also, some guy named Tim I think that’s his friend or something
Y/N That son of a bitch
Ellie Do you know him?
Y/N Not personally, but yeah
Ellie Have mercy on his soul
Y/N Don’t you know him?
Ellie Why would I know Tim?
Y/N Isn’t Conner friends with the Waynes?
Ellie I think so…?
Y/N Eleanor You have been dating Sunshine Boy for almost a year And you don’t know?
Ellie Don’t call me that It makes me feel like I’m in trouble
Y/N Eleanor Stop deflecting
Ellie Okay, yes he’s friends with the Waynes I just never personally met them yet They kind of scare me
Y/N I’m ashamed to call you my sister
Ellie EXCUSE ME HAVE YOU SEEN THEM?
Y/N YES I’m talking to one of them, remember?
Ellie JASON’S A WAYNE?
Y/N Did I not mention that?
Ellie NO YOU BURIED THE LEAD ON THAT ONE
Y/N Oopsie
Ellie DON’T OOPSIE ME Y/N
Y/N Welp, gotta go
Ellie BITCH GET BACK HERE WE’RE NOT DONE Y/N
Y/N (12:20 pm) Your brother is dead to me
Jason I have like four You need to be more specific 
Y/N Tim
Jason Ah, yeah okay that tracks
Y/N Tell him to count his days I’m coming for him
Jason All this over a phone number
Y/N He doesn’t even know me Why would he do this?
Jason I don’t know I personally think he likes the drama
Y/N I hope he knows the consequences
Jason He’ll find out once he meets you Conner finally confessed?
Y/N Not to me
Jason Had a conversation with your sister I take it
Y/N Apparently, I had this ‘I don’t like him’ vibe going on And that’s why she didn’t want to tell me Which fair, I didn’t like anyone in high school much But Conner was okay
Jason And now they’re dating
Y/N Which I find bizarre but if she’s happy then it’s whatever
Jason Did you threaten Conner if he ever broke her heart
Y/N … No Excuse me please
Jason I am so glad he’s not my friend
Y/N You break Ellie’s heart I’m coming for you
Conner I would like to see you try
Y/N I will try And I will win
Conner Don’t know how, you know jack shit about me
Y/N I’ll ask Ellie once her broken heart is mended And then I will be coming for you
Conner Well, that won’t happen I don’t plan to hurt her
Y/N I hope so Cuz you’ll be dealing with me And I can be your worst nightmare
Conner Don’t you have a boyfriend to kiss?
Y/N Don’t you have girlfriend to kiss?
Conner I do and I’m about to go see her
Y/NNo Nope I don’t want to hear about your relationship Especially not you
ConnerAwe come Y/N Afraid of a little pda?
Y/NThat’s my sister you’re talking about Be careful Oh, before I forget Pass a message to Tim for me? Tell him he better watch his back
Conner SHE RATTED ME OUT
Y/N Sir, she is my sister She is my best friend And we’ll tell each other things you wish you could hear
--
Y/N I think I scared him
Jason He probably deserved it
Y/N Hey, what do you mean Conner’s not really your friend? Didn’t you hang out last weekend?
Jason Conners more Tim’s friend then he is mine And yes but only because I was doing something for Tim
Y/N He couldn’t have done it?
Jason Probably But I was coming out there anyways so I volunteered
Y/N You know what I think?
Jason No and I don’t think I want to know But you’re going to tell me anyway
Y/N Even though you claim you don’t like your family very much I think you secretly like your family You just hide it well Jason? Oh no I said something you didn’t like I’m sorry
--
Jason (4:20 pm) It’s okay So Wanna do something tonight?
Y/N: Ah, he speaks
Jason Okay, yeah that was kind of deserved I’m sorry for just disappearing on you earlier
Y/N It’s okay There will probably be times where I will do the same thing I just need some patience from you And I’ll be patient with you
Jason At least your honest
Y/N I just really don’t want to fuck this up
Jason I second that So, do you want to?
Y/N Do I want to what?
Jason Seriously? I asked like two seconds ago
Y/N Okay, but in my defense I am ~distracted~
Jason With another boy? How could you
Y/N Okay, first of all fuck you And second of all I’m trying to find the books I need
Jason Only if you’re going to help
Y/N I have some regrets right now
Jason Did you forget your library card again?
Y/N No, this time I actually remembered
Jason I’m proud of you for that
Y/N Mm, can’t tell if your being sarcastic or not
Jason 100% serious
Y/N Well damn Now I’m flustered
Jason Oh? Information to store away
Y/N I feel like I made a mistake
Jason Only time will tell
Y/N So, what was the question again?
Jason Scroll up?
Y/N Respectfully, no
Jason Lol okay Would you like to do something tonight?
Y/N Really trying to get to the fifth date I see
Jason Nah, I can wait for that I just wanted to hang out
Y/N Your brothers don’t need help tonight?
Jason Surprisingly no, they don’t. Are you trying to get out of hanging out with me?
Y/N Uh, no I’ve got a project I’m working on I don’t want to bore you
Jason Nonsense I can bring something to read It’d be nice to sit around and relax
Y/N If you're sure
Jason I’m sure I’ll bring food
Y/N You know where I live
Jason All I had to do is say food and you're in? Very easy to please huh?
Y/N I wouldn’t say that But yes, I’m very easy to persuade when foods involved
Jason Any food allergies?
Y/N Not that I’m aware of
Jason Alright I’ll text you when I’m on my way
Y/N Okay But don’t get to offended if I don’t respond There will be a chance I’ll turn off my phone once I get home I don’t want to get distracted Especially if Conner wants to yell at me some more
Jason Thanks for the warning
True to your word, you hadn’t answered when Jason messaged you. But he wasn’t too worried, earlier while he was busy at home, you had sent a message saying you got home fine and that you’ll be shutting off your phone soon. 
Jason had been too busy to answer, but his heart swelled at the care you seemed to have for him. That you knew he’d worry about you without having to say something. Sure, his family cared about him but there was something different when you cared.
He shot a text back saying he’d be coming soon before going about cleaning his guns.
An hour later, he was finished and left his apartment with food on his mind.
The sound of knocking at your door broke your concentration. You blinked back to awareness just as another round of knocks sounded. 
“Come in!” you called, leaning back from the coffee table to stretch. You let out a noise of satisfaction when your bones cracked.
“You should have your doors locked when you're home alone,” Jason called, closing the door behind him. “You never know what creep might come in.”
“Yeah, but I knew you were coming and I tend to hyper focus on my work,” you answered, turning around to watch Jason walk into the living room, carrying a couple of boxes of pizza. “Saves me the trip of opening the door.”
“There was a chance that it wasn’t me behind the door,” he said, setting the boxes down after you made some room for them.
“No, but I don’t have people come over.”
“What about your friends?”
“They have a key, and come unannounced. Aside from my neighbours, you're the only one who knocks.”
“Still, gotta be more cautious,” Jason warned, grunting as he sat on the floor beside you. “Hungry?”
“Starved.”
The two of you settled into a comfortable silence as you ate, only making idle conversation. The conversations ranged from what your favourite things are to embarrassed stories growing up, to darkest secrets.
Jason had kept his lips sealed with his secrets, but you weren’t mad about it. They were his, and his alone. If he didn’t want to share, he didn’t have to. And you made sure he knew you understood.
When there were only a few slices of pizza, and your stomach was full did you turn back to your homework. Reluctantly, you rather talk to Jason then do homework. But it wasn’t going to finish by itself and you needed the grade.
“Do you always work in silence?” Jason asked as he stood to stretch.
“Usually I have music playing, but the neighbours kept complaining about the noise level. And I don’t like blasting music in my ears,” you answered, and gestured towards your collection of CDs. “Help yourself if you find anything you like.”
Jason wandered over and whistled. “That’s quite the collection.”
“What can I say? Started it when I was, I don’t know, ten? And just kept collecting,” you said absentmindedly, “same goes with my books.”
“Let’s see what we have here,” Jason mumbled as he looked through them. “Classical, pop, rock, metal, jazz? Man you have a little bit of everything huh?”
“Yup.”
“Oh ho ho, what’s this?” Jason sang, catching your attention. You looked up just in time to watch Jason pull out a familiar CD. “A mixed CD? I didn’t know you were the type.”
You jumped up and tripped over the couch when you launched yourself over it. Picking yourself up from the floor, you ran and jumped onto Jason’s back, reaching for the CD he held above his head.
“Holy shit,” he grunted at the impact, stumbling forward, trying to regain his balance. “You’re a lot heavier than you look.”
“That is not something you tell a person,” you muttered, making a noise as you tried to reach for the CD. “Give it back.”
“What’s on there? Porn?”
“No,” you said, flustered, “why would I do that?”
“No you're right, you’re not that type of person,” he mused, moving the CD further from you. He glanced up and laughed. “I didn’t know you were such a hopeless romantic.”
“Shut up,” you squealed and shouted in victory when you succeeded in grabbing the CD from him. “Ha!” you said and jumped off him, you left the room to hide the mixed tape elsewhere.
“You know, there isn’t a hiding place here that I couldn’t find,” Jason said dryly when you walked into the living room.
“That I have no doubt,” you replied, sitting back on the floor. “But that cd is not one I would like to listen to right now.”
“Is it embarrassing?”
“Yes. I rather not cringe at all the memories those songs will bring.”
“That’s a juicy story I can tell,”he said, turning back to back your collection. 
“Only if you tell me your death story,” you shot back. When Jason said nothing, you nodded. “I thought so.”
“Okay, so we both have stories we don't want to talk about,” he confessed, “doesn’t mean they’re great.”
“Agree to disagree.”
Silence settled between the two of you as you continued with your paper and Jason kept looking through your CDs. A few minutes later, the room was filled with Tchaikovsky.
“Never thought you’d be a Nutcracker fan,” you commented as the first song started.
“Sometimes you just want to listen to the classics,” he said, moving towards your bookshelf. “Do you mind?”
You looked up to see him gesturing towards your books. You shook your head and went back to your paper. “I thought you were gonna bring a book.”
“I forgot it at home.”
“Too excited to come see me?” you teased.
“No, I had food on my mind,” he teased back and laughed at the look you gave him. “And you, I was also thinking about you too.”
You hummed, watching as he finally picked a book and made his way to the couch. He plopped down, he moved around a bit until he was comfortable before opening the book. You tilted your head trying to read the title and smiled.
“You’re full of surprises, Jason,” you said before turning back towards the coffee table again. 
“So are you,” he shot back, and that was the end of the conversation. For a while, the only sounds were the music, the occasional page flipping and a pencil scratching against paper.
There was a peace that settled with the two of you as you did your own things. A peace that both of you haven’t felt in awhile, so much that you kind of forgot the presence of the other person.
You stayed on the floor most of the time, only getting up to use the bathroom and to switch out the CDs once they finished. A couple of hours later, your homework was finally done, you sat back and stretched.
“Hey, I just remembered I have som-” you cut yourself short when you looked up to see Jason fast alseep on the couch. You weren’t sure at what point he had fallen asleep, but it looked like he needed it.
So, instead of waking him up, you let him sleep. Standing up, you reached down to grab the Jane Austen book he was in the middle of reading. You made sure to bookmark it in case he wanted to finish it the next time he was over.
Setting it on the coffee table, you made your way over to turn down the music until it was just softly playing before grabbing a blanket to cover Jason with.
“Rest well,” you whispered as you tucked in him slightly. “I think you need it.”
You turned back to your bookshelf and grabbed a book for yourself before going to sit back on the floor where you were doing your homework and started reading.
Jason woke up to his phone vibrating against his leg. He blinked, confused about where he was. The ceiling he was looking at didn’t look like his, and the last thing he remembered was reading on the couch. At your house.
“Oh shit,” he mumbled, as the puzzle pieces fell together. “I fell asleep.”
“Turn it off,” came a mumble from beside him. He turned his head to find you leaning against the couch, head tilting up fast asleep. “Five more minutes, Mom. I’m tired.”
Smiling, he grabbed his phone from his pocket and glared at the name that flashed across his screen. “What do you want, Tim?”
 “Where are you?” Tim asked instead of answering. “You were supposed to be here like, two hours ago.”
“I told you I wasn’t going out tonight. Bruce knows this, so does Dick and they said they were okay with it.”
“Yeah, but you promised.”
“You and I both know, I didn’t promise shit,” he whispered, “whatever it is, you’ll have to deal without me.”
“Its not the same,” Tim whined. “And why are we whispering?”
“None of your business.”
“You’re with Y/N aren’t you?” Tim asked, and Jason could tell he was smiling.
“You know, I hope that whatever Y/N does to you, you’ll suffer,” Jason snapped and tried to keep his laugh in at the “hey!” Tim yelled.
“What did I ever do to them? We haven’t even met!”
“Enough that they’re out for blood,” Jason said, not wanting to elaborate. “I have to go.” He hung up before Tim could question him further, and stuffed his phone back in his pocket. Turning his head to look at you again, he thought about what to do next.
Sleeping on the floor like that couldn’t be comfortable and he knew should wake up and leave, but it was late and he wanted to let you sleep. Instead, he slowly got off the couch without waking you. He went to the bathroom before going around the apartment to lock the windows and doors, and turned off the lights that were on.
He made his way back to the living room, and gently picked you up before setting you back down on the couch. He tucked you in with the blanket you had given him.
Satisfied that you were safe in your own apartment, he turned to leave. But before he could, something grabbed his arm, stopping him. He stalled and turned around slowly, and raised an eyebrow when he noticed you staring at him.
“It’s late, Jason,” you mumbled, “I’m not going to let you go home this late.”
“How are you going to stop me?” Jason challenged. Instead of answering, you tugged his arm hard enough to make him stumble towards you. He braced himself against the back of the couch, preventing him from falling completely onto you. “You’re very bold when your half asleep,” he joked. You stuck your tongue out at him and tugged on his arm again.
“Shut up and lay down,” you mumbled, trying to get up from the couch. Jason moved to sit down beside you. “I’m too tired to move to my bed. So, you can take my bed or share the couch.”
He watched as you curled up on the one side of the couch and moved the blanket so he could have some too. “Are you sure?”
“I’m sure,” you mumbled, eyes already closing. “I don’t make the people I care about leave in the middle of the night. You never know what could happen on the way home.”
Touched, and not wanting to make you worry, Jason took the corner of the blanket you weren’t using and settled down on the couch. He didn’t fall asleep right away. Opting instead to read more of his book. Within minutes of reading, however, sleep claimed him.
189 notes · View notes
thepenultimateword · 1 year
Text
Skin Crawl
CW: Bugs, Bug horror, bullying
Hero scrubbed uselessly at the permanent marker, but even with the rubbing alcohol stinging their nose and their shoulders sore from vigor, an outline of obscenities stubbornly marred the top corner of the desk.
Hero sighed, leaning back on their heels. How did they even get roped into this? They’d only pointed out the spattering of language to their teacher so that they could punish those responsible. They hadn’t been volunteering to clean up the mess themselves. But the teacher had seemed so pleased with their willingness to help…how could they have refused?
They glanced to the back of the classroom where their dark haired classmate leaned way back in their seat, feet kicked up on their desk, book held open directly overhead.
“Are you…going to help?”
“Sure,” they waved without looking away from their page. “You can go if you want. I’ll do the rest.”
Hero straightened their aching back. “Will you?”
It came out a little snarkier than they’d intended, but Villain wasn’t exactly known for their work ethic. They were always coming to school late, staring off, or ignoring assignments. Unlike Hero, they hadn’t volunteered for classroom cleanup.
Villain cocked their head to the side, raising one dark brow. “How many times have you cleaned this classroom?”
“Well, just this once—“
“How many times have I cleaned this classroom?”
“How am I supposed to know? I don’t count all the times you mess around—“
“Oh yes, you do. You have that cute little book with all the tallies.”
Hero’s face burned.
But for some reason, Villain didn’t sound angry, just…making a point.
"Go on, open up to my page. Tell me how much experience I have staying after school."
Hero shouldered their backpack with a huff. "Ok, I get it. Just...make sure you drop the classroom key at the office when you're done. I don't want to lose the staff's trust because of you."
"Yes, master," Villain said and went back to their book.
Hero hesitated. Part of them still didn't trust their classmate to continue where they'd left off. Could this be a ruse to get them in trouble? Or maybe they just wanted Hero out of their hair and didn't care about the consequences.
Or maybe you need more faith in people.
Ugh. That was hard when everyone in this school had proven untrustworthy. Even the friends they'd made from the 'good crowd' hadn't lasted past the first month of the school year. None of them had what it took to stand up against immorality. They'd rather turn a blind eye and cut ties with anyone who might stir up the hornet's nest.
Whatever.
They grabbed their notebook off their desk and whisked out of the room. Now, what misdeeds had they borne witness to today? They flipped open to the middle of the boo; they might as well report these to the office before heading home.
11:45am--Caleb stuck gum on the inside of his desk sticking together the pages of the math textbook
11:50--Kayla texted in class for half an hour straight and did not complete any of her schoolwork.
12:30--An unknown underclassman with red hair shoved a smaller boy at lunch and took his place in line (please identify).
12:45--Taylor C. was making out with her boyfriend in front of the east stairs between classes, blocking off the way for anyone needing to use them. She also used some choice language against a well-meaning student who asked her to refrain until they left the grounds.
12:48--Victor verbally harassed an underclassman girl in the hallway despite her repeated refusals for acquaintanceship; he did not respond well to outside interven--
Hero's notebook hit the floor with a loud smack.
For a moment all they could do was stare at their empty hands in shock, then they lifted their gaze to the sneering, chiseled face in front of them.
"How many times did it make it into Book Golden Rule now?"
"Only once today, Victor," Hero said, bending for the book. Victor snatched it just before their fingers could brush the spine. At about the same moment, someone kicked them behind their right knee. Hard.
Hero gasped, collapsing onto the sneaker-smudged tile.
Victor flicked casually through the pages, stopping at his own tally sheet near the front. "Wow, my infraction rap is growing. You must be obsessed with me or something. Kinda gross but I guess you can't help it."
A chorus of laughter sounded over Hero's shoulder, and suddenly they were surrounded on all sides. They defiantly looked into the perpetrator's faces, memorizing identities: Caleb, Rick, Renna.
"Just give it back," Hero said dryly. "You're only making this worse on yourself."
Victor laughed now. "Really now? Your self-righteous ego is so big you still think you've got the upper hand here?"
"Not physically obviously, but anything you do to me, I'm just going to add it to my report."
Victor stared Hero dead in the eyes and slowly tore the notebook in half.
"I'm going to beat you so soundly, you won't even look at me without peeing yourself. You're going to look away from everything I do because all you'll remember is the pain of this moment.
"I'd never turn a blind eye for my own personal--"
The words scattered as Victor's fist met their mouth. Before they could recover he hit them again. And again. And again. A cleated food hit them from behind, sending a stab of electric agony up their spine. Dangerous. This wasn't just a scuffle. They wanted to seriously hurt them!
The next punch threw Hero on their back. They'd never been one for envy, but suddenly they wished they had one of those combat powers, super strength, invincible skin, knife fingers, anything actually useful for defeating evil!
Army boots smashed over their fingers.
Hero screamed.
"Shut them up!" Victor snarled.
Caleb's shaved head bent over them, and something knit and strongly scented of sweat was forced between their teeth and far enough in to make them gag. They spasmed but movement only made Caleb lean in harder. They couldn't breathe!
Where was the principal? Where were the teachers? Someone had to be hearing this? Someone here had to care?
The boots hit their ribs and tears gathered in their eyes.
"Aww, the wittle baby is cwying," Renna said. She balanced one foot on the center of Hero's chest and slowly leaned in her weight. "How does it feel when someone steps on you?"
Hero wanted to say that exposing someone for cheating wasn't crushing anything deserved, but there was too much sweater down their windpipe.
"Hey."
The group jolted and some of the wight lifted. Hero's vision was blurred, but between Victor and Rick's shoulders, they made out unkempt midnight hair and lanky limbs. Villain.
"If it isn't Psycho," Victor practically purred. "You want to get a few blows in too? Go nuts."
Hero's screaming insides twisted. They cared more about facts than rumors but they'd also never been this helpless in front of their dark classmate, as alone and outcast as they were but for totally different reasons. Villain supposedly had a penchant for macabre experimentation. Students said they had a devil in them. That they ate the raw innards of animals to feed it and placed curses on anyone who messed with them. There was even a rumor that they dissected a kid who made fun of them in class. Hero always found that one ridiculous, the student probably just moved away. But now, pinned and gagged and Villain getting closer they were having doubts.
Villain stopped directly in front of them. "Let the angel go."
Victor gaped for a moment. "Are you kidding? They write you up almost as much as me. You think all those after-school detentions come from thin air?"
Villain only slow blinked. "I'm giving you 5 seconds to get out of here before I do go psycho. Unlike angel, my problem-solving is more physical."
"Get out of here," Victor said waving Villlain away before back toward Hero, though the rest of his crew looked a little more nervous.
Villain shrugged. "Suit yourself."
Their mouth opened wide, cavernous. The inside might have actually been black for all Hero could see. Though something almost seemed...to move.
The first centipede dropped on Renna's boot.
"What the..." She kicked it off, lip curled in disgust. "Did you just throw--" As she turned back, she let out a splitting scream. Everyone whirled. Caleb lost his grip on the sweater gag, and Hero finally managed to roll to the side, coughing and spitting. When they raised their head again a mass of black centipedes scurried across the floor, swarming the group's shoes and wriggling up their legs. The great arthropods dropped in heavy droves from Villain's lips, some crawling down the sides of his face and neck in rapid desperation to get to the floor. Through it all Villain was still and unflinching though their eyes danced with dark amusement.
"You freak!" Victor shrieked slapping off bugs--all four perpetrators were already littered with angry bites. "You're possessed! You're--"
He cut off as a low buzz gathered in the back of Villain's throat, this time the bugs emerged as a cloud, a swarm of wasps, as black and large as the centipedes.
"Forget this!" Rick cried, taking off at top speed Renna and Caleb were close behind. Victor looked like he wanted to curse them out but all he managed was a rude hand gesture before taking off after his posse.
The centipedes followed in a dark wave, cutting a path on either side of Hero. Villain let them go, though a deep inhale sucked the wasp swarm, and a few stragglers on their shirt, back down.
Hero stared. Villain stared back. Hard black eyes evaluating. Hero's breath caught in their chest, which was probably for the best. It hurt to breathe right now.
“You know it’s being an insufferable goody two shoes that keeps getting you in trouble," Villain finally said.
Hero rose achily to their feet, brusquely wiping their face with a stifled sniffle. "Yeah, well...no one asked you." Tears threatened to spill full force over their lashes, so they began quickly gathering up the pages of their shredded notebook. "I'm going to have to add a tally for physical violence in school. I can't be biased."
Villain barked an incredulous laugh. "You're really something else, you know that?"
"And you have centipedes living in your stomach."
"Not sure if they actually live there, more like they materialize there when I want them."
"And how'd you figure that out?"
Villain smiled. "You mean you don't commonly dream of centipedes?"
Not really an answer but Hero snorted, catching themself with a wince on the wall as they did.
Slender fingers gripped their shoulders. "You should sit down."
Hero obeyed without argument. They probably looked completely pathetic right now. Tear stained, bruised, shaking. They'd always sworn it didn't matter how many people disliked them as long as they had their dignity. So much for that.
Hero ducked their head between their knees.
"Why'd you help me? Victor's right. I get you in trouble almost daily."
Villain slid down on the floor next to them. "Yeah. But being a massive pain in the butt doesn't mean you deserve to get beaten up. Besides, some of the things they do need to be exposed. And...it's impressive that you're not scared to do it."
Hero didn't fully know how to respond. That someone needed to care? That obviously when five students screaming at the top of their lungs didn't even crack a door there was a problem? Yes, they'd realized early on that putting things on paper was the best way to get results, but it wasn't like they were completely without ulterior motives either. Did choosing to confront the bad for self-serving motives make them any better than those who turned away? Villain had called them angel. But they were far from it.
"Is it a power?" Hero said, shoving away the thoughts and pointing at their mouth instead.
Villain nodded.
“Cool.” They couldn’t help the note of awe.
“Really?”
Hero looked them head on. “Yeah. I guess it’s unconventional, but you took on four people and won without moving an inch. That’s a real power.”
"You don't think it's disgusting?” For the first time Villain looked something close to vulnerable. Like Hero’s reply had thrown them off so much they’d forgotten their nonchalance. “It doesn’t make your skin crawl?"
"Not really." Hero looked up and down the vacant hallway. They wet their lips, took a deep breath, and shed their skin. They’d done it in the mirror enough times to know it was disturbing. It wasn’t the sort of shapeshifting that happened in glamorized movies. It was messy. Sometimes bloody if they went too fast. They looked at Villain with a mirror of their face. “That make your skin crawl?"
Villain grinned. "Not really."
A beat.
“So that’s how you get the dirt on so many people.”
Hero flushed and shed back into their own skin.“Most of the time yeah. They usually cover things up if they see me.”
Villain’s eyes roved them up down, hard and cutting and dark, like black diamonds. “Amazing.”
Hero shrugged, trying to pretend that gaze was not cutting them to the core. “It’s not a useful power. I connive against evil. I don’t beat it. After graduation I want to try for Allegiance Academy but…well you saw. What hero team would want someone who can’t even fight? Even with combat classes I’d never compare to the big powerhouses.”
Villain didn’t respond.
Great. Hero opened up to much. They’d gotten whiny with a practical stranger. They’d gotten Hero out is tight spot, not asked for their life’s dreams and woes
“Don’t hero teams need reconnaisance?” Villain said
Hero blinked. “I guess so.”
They’d never really thought about it before. That wasn’t the sort of role that showed up on the news. It wasn’t the thing that got peace prizes or admirers. But…maybe that was fine. They’d always craved power for the sake of being accepted into the academy and eventually chosen for a team, not for the sake of attention. Besides they were used to being alone; they were fine with it.
"Well, I better finish that cleaning," Villain said, pushing to their feet. "I wouldn't dare risk another infraction."
"Villain," Hero said before they got too far.
"Hm?"
"Thank you. For the help. You're...good."
Villain crooked a smile. "Never been called that before. Probably won't again. But I appreciate it."
With that, they were gone.
Perhaps Hero didn't need to be alone after all.
8 years later��
Hero straightened their silk tie in the rearview mirror, a silvery ribboned thing they normally wouldn't have gone for but couldn't say they disliked. Though maybe that was because it suited this face. Round, prim, pink-lipped, nothing like their own drab, haggard countenance. They swore each time they returned to their true skin it looked worse.
They quickly double-checked their current contours with the photo in their glove box. "So, this is our target's lover?"
"Remy Navarro," their earpiece crackled. "They've been together six months, and they are very involved in this villain's inside plans. We're thinking 24 hours tops before you come across something big."
Hero stepped out of the car and began weaving their way through the menagerie of fine-dressed gala members. "Ok, well you rushed me into this, anything else I should know before I find this criminal overlord?"
Their teammate hesitated at the other end of the line. "Just don't act surprised about the legs."
"Legs?" Hero said. "As in, they look weird?"
"As in. there are extras."
"Excuse me? I'm really beginning to think I didn't get a proper debrief."
"It was an unexpected opening. We had to take it. Anyways you're good at improvising."
Hero dodged around a cocktail tray. "I appreciate your faith in me, but I'm better at improvising when I've had a week to carefully study my subject's personality and mannerisms. I mean what is my personality? Are they an affectionate couple?"
Silence and then finally, "You'll be fine."
"Are you kidding me? Other Hero! Other Hero?"
They'd dropped the line, hadn't they? Hero sighed, stuffing the earpiece into their pocket. Sure, they'd do better without distractions, but this was verging on insanity. Other Hero had better gather more info on their new identity before tomorrow.
They stopped in front of an intricately carved set of double doors at the tops of the stairs. The private quarters of the newest villainous boss their team had begun tracking. The assignment was a rush job so all they had was a blueprint layout and the supposition that tonight's gala was prepared as a cover for something big.
They rapped quietly on the wood before immediately easing the door open. Lovers would be comfortable enough to do that, right?
A tall figure turned as they entered. Long midnight hair fell over dark-clad shoulders. Dark, hard eyes stared out of an even harder face. And yes, there were extra legs, though not the kind Hero had been expecting: they were black, rigid, clawed things sticking out from their sides, almost like those of an insect. Meanwhile, a pair of pitch-colored moth wings folded on their back, the tails gliding on the floor like drapery.
"Took you long enough," the villain said. A black centipede crawled down their cheek and settled like a parrot on the villain's shoulder.
Hero froze on the threshold, desperately trying to connect their dropped jaw back to their brain so they could snap it shut.
It had been years since they'd seen this dark figure; their jaw seemed even sharper, their lankiness had turned to elegant slenderness, and the bug parts were new, but Hero recognized them immediately.
Villain.
Part Two
Master Taglist:
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mycatsaidwhat · 1 year
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things i've heard college professors say pt. 15
-type “humpty dumpty sat on a wall humpty dumpty had a great fall” with no spaces and no regrets 
-I sincerely don’t sit around reading the wills of people from 16th century Stratford-upon-Avon
-do we have a federal department of education? *reluctantly* yes we do 
-okay. It’s 10:30 and I’m cold and mad. 
-I was assigned to read Macbeth and was like what the fuck, I want to play Nintendo 
-That sounds like something said by someone who wrote 12 historyplays 
-I googled today, which I really suggest you guys do 
-not to bring up florida,
-current event: balloons!
-(cytogeneticist) I make a lot of money saying I don’t know. It’s a pretty sweet gig.  
-*someone comes into the classroom looking lost* is there a meeting in here at 11?
(professor) no i don’t think so, this class goes until 11:30
*person leaves* 
(professor, turning back to the class) probably a serial killer 
-Yeah, and then Shakespeare was like I never fucking loved you– 
-The three typical sources of creative nonfiction essays are the unconscious mind, literature, or the trauma of our lives. Now none of these are technically untrue–
-you don’t have to be smart to understand Shakespeare
*alarm starts going off on student’s phone* 
OH GOD I’M SORRY IM BEING SMITED 
-“In which the men spend several hours taunting each other with speeches and thwacking each other with sticks.” Yes. That sounds perfect. 
-This is, like, nerdy shit I’ve learned over the years 
255 notes · View notes
promise-you-doie · 6 months
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Who knew? | L. Sohee
Tumblr media
Who knew the love of your life would be the weirdo you met in a coffee shop?
Sohee x afab!reader
Word count: 8k
Warnings: curse words
Genre: fluff, angst
Playlist
“Someone woke up on the wrong side of the bed.” Karina snickers, leaving the kitchen so she doesn’t have to be in the same area as you. 
Mad isn’t even a strong enough word to describe how you feel right now. You can feel your blood boiling, and every little sound causes you to get more and more frustrated. The reason? You missed all 7 of your alarms because you forgot to charge your phone the night before. 
If there was anything you hated more than the male species, it had to be waking up at 11 am. 
That means you have only 30 minutes until your first lecture of the day, which by the way isn’t nearly enough time to pick out an outfit, do your skin care, your makeup routine, and your hair, and still get to class on time. 
Waking up at 11 on any day, including the weekend, basically meant that your day was already ruined. You’ve already wasted half the day, so it’s best to protect your peace and just stay home. And that’s what you decide to do after attempting to do your hair but quitting after its lack of cooperation.
“I wanna die.” You slur into a pillow after successfully spending 30 minutes getting angry at any and everything. 
“Why die when the sky is clear and blue.” Winter chimes happily, a little too happy for your liking. 
“Maybe you just need some fresh air and a coffee.” Ningning suggests from the bathroom. “I heard there’s a new cafe down the street, you should go.” She adds 
“I don’t wanna go outside. I wanna lay here and die.” You say it as a joke, but some part of you is serious. 
Either way, You still end up at the cafe. Even though Siri kept giving you the wrong directions. What should have been a 7-minute walk turned into 2, 15-minute laps. It’s safe to say that by the time you arrived, you had completely lost your appetite for coffee.
But you’re persistent in making the best out of this unlucky Monday. Walking into the cafe with a facial expression that tells everyone around you that it was only 12:01 and you were already having a bad day. 
“Hi, could I get an Iced Americano?” You say blandly, forcing a small smile to cover the bad mood you are in 
“What size?” The barista asks
“Large.” You needed it. 
“Will that be all?” He asks. 
 You nod “Yes,” while patting your pockets for your wallet. Here's the catch, you left it at home. Before you resort to your last plan; screaming, crying, and sobbing on your knees, you decide to check your purse. Except, you don’t have that either.
“Your total is gonna be 5.05” The barista looks at you distantly as if he couldn’t see the internal war that you were battling right now before his very eyes. “I-” “I got it.” You watch someone stick their arm past you to put their card in the card reader. Thus paying for your much-needed drink. 
“You didn’t have to.” You say shyly, without even looking in the stranger's direction. 
“Don’t worry about it.” 
“I’ll pay you back.” You finally turn to look at him. “Just uh…” You rush to pull out your phone and unlock it. “Give me your number, and I’ll wire it to you as soon as I get home.” 
There were lots of things you hated, men being on the top of the list and being indebted to people is fourth down from it, with “Especially to men” written beside it in parenthesis. So anytime a man did anything nice to you, you wanted to make sure you paid them back immediately just so they don’t try to hold it over your head later. 
“It’s only five dollars.” the stranger says 
“Just let me pay you back, Please.” You beg, still holding your phone out for him to put his information in.
“Well if you really wanna pay me, you could just allow me to take you out on a date.” His response leaves you dumbfounded. A frown grows on your face when he smiles at you. 
If someone were to ask why you were adamant about burning all the men alive, this was the exact reason why. “You’re kidding… right?” You laugh, because surely this has to be a joke. When you walked out of your apartment this morning you were hoping to just have a cup of coffee and maybe some exercise. The last thing you were thinking was to have some guy hitting on you after he practically forced you to let him pay for your coffee. (you didn’t ask him to do that, so basically he did it by force.) 
“Y/n.” The barista calls out your name, luckily to pull you away from the weirdo that is subliminally asking to get in your pants. During broad daylight, in front of a crowd of people.
“Thank you.” You muster up a smile for the barista and head towards the door. Leaving the stranger behind. Owing him doesn’t even matter anymore. It’s not like you’re ever gonna see him again. 
You let out a deep sigh when you hear him yell “You’re welcome.” once you leave the cafe and the door closes behind you.     
“Today has to be the worst day ever.” You complain the second you step into your apartment. Catching the attention of your four other roommates. 
The apartment was small and probably shitty to most but it didn’t matter to any of you because you were all together and the rent was too high nowadays. So if it took all of you piling over each other just so you wouldn’t be homeless, so be it. 
However, being in a small 3-bedroom apartment with 4 other girls meant no secrets. Not because the five of you were nosy, it’s just that the walls were thin and there was absolutely nowhere to go to get any privacy. Best believe there were things about the girls that you wish you didn’t know. 
“Couldn’t have been that bad,” Karina says nonchalantly, walking past you towards the living room to plop down on the couch and catch up on the series she’s been binging for a week now. 
“Well, first I woke up late..” You’re tailing after Karina but get stopped when Ningning walks in your direction, only to take the coffee out of your hand and begin taking sips out of it. “This is good.” She nods without acknowledging the story you’re trying to tell everyone. Skipping to the couch with your drink still in her hand. 
“There’s probably someone in the world dying right now, while you’re crying about sleeping in for a few hours.” Giselle scolds but she doesn’t even take the time to look at you. She just takes a seat next to Ningning and helps the two girls finish what’s left of your coffee. 
“No, but listen, I went to go to the cafe as you guys suggested. But the directions were being stupid.” 
“Was it the directions or was it you?” Karina asks, shaking around the ice in the coffee. 
“It might have been me but that’s not the point.” You dismiss, “After like 30 minutes I finally find the cafe and I go to place my order.” 
“But let me guess- You forgot your card.” Giselle interrupts you.
“Well, yeah. And then-"Wait, if you forgot your card, how’d you get this coffee.” Ningning asks instead of letting you finish what you’re so desperately trying to get out. 
“The barista obviously thought she was cute and gave it to her for free,” Giselle answers for you. 
“No. I-” 
“For free? I don’t think so. Y/n’s pretty but she’s not ‘I think you’re so pretty that I’m gonna risk my job and be homeless’ pretty. Some guy probably just found interest in her and paid for her coffee, so she insisted on paying him back because she never knows how to accept when someone’s being nice but he refused cash and asked her to just let him take her on the date instead.” Karina somehow predicts everything perfectly, which is kinda scary. 
“Yeah, actually” You confirm, but you’re still at a loss for words. 
“So what did you say?” Ningning turns to you. 
“No, of course. This is y/n we’re talking about.” Karina sits up to give you the last bit of coffee but winter reaches it before you do. Swiping it right from under you and taking the last swallow. 
“Well, at least you got free coffee.” Giselle points out. 
“And I'll tell you what I got,” Winter demands everyone's attention. Throwing her arm around your shoulder and turning to you when she says “We’re gonna get you laid tonight.” 
“What are you talking about?” Giselle asks before you get the chance. 
“Jaemin just invited us to a party and guess who’s gonna be there,” Winter asks, pointing to Ningning who pipes up, slapping her hands together.
 “I’m guessing, Jaemin.” You say nonchalantly. 
“Sohee.” Ningning chimes. By now she’s jumping up and down. 
Sohee is the guy she’s been trying to set you up with for weeks. You never met him and you don’t really wanna meet him. She tells you that she has a feeling that you’ll like him but you don’t think that’s the case because well, he’s a man. 
“I’m not going.” You state pushing Winter's arm off of you so you can go to your bedroom. Pretending not to hear all of them yell “Boring.” before you close the door. 
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Another con with living with four other girls is that everyone is always ganging up against you. There wasn’t much ground for you to hold when it was always 4:1. With that being said, it was no surprise that you still ended up at Jaemin’s party even after making 101 excuses as to why you couldn’t go. 
You were a few hours late of course. If the girls were gonna drag you out you had to make sure that you wasted as much time as possible. 
“Here, drink this.” Giselle pushes some drink in your face. 
“What is it?” 
“Doesn’t matter, drink it.” She continues pushing the cup towards you until you take it and down the whole thing. Not caring what it is because you’re sure that she wouldn’t give you anything too dangerous right?
wrong.
“That’s horrible.” You yell over the music, wiping the excess liquid from your lips with the back of your hand. 
“Isn’t it? I thought I was the only one.” Giselle laughs while taking the cup from your hand. You didn’t bother to argue with her, since it was something that she had a habit of doing. Instead, you just sit there around the couch watching everyone else have fun and decide that you’d rather be home. Or probably anywhere else. 
Some people might say that you’re a prick or a party pooper, that you were stuck up and unfun but you’d say, they were absolutely right. What are you even supposed to do at these kinds of things? All you saw were really bad dance moves, a mess, and a hangover in the morning. What could be so fun about that? 
“Woah.” You hear someone say from behind you. You don’t roll your eyes yet but you want to, because you’re almost sure you know who it is before you even see them. “I didn’t think this would be the place that I run into you again.” The boy says when you finally turn around to meet him. 
The universe must absolutely hate you, you think. Because there is just no way that you run into the same man again within the same day. “Why not?” You say arms crossed with a frown bigger than the one you had this morning when you ran into him the first time. 
“Well…” He looks you up and down.
“What are you trying to say?” 
“This just doesn’t look like something that you’d be into, that’s all.” He smiles and leans against the wall beside you. “But I’m glad you’re here.” 
This time you roll your eyes and walk away. You don’t have enough time nor do you care enough to try and change his mind about you. Thankfully he doesn’t try and chase after you but he does yell “I hope you enjoyed the coffee.” to which you hold your middle finger up behind you so he can see it. 
“Y/n where are you going?” Ningning runs to you, tugging at your arm when you reach Jaemin’s front door. 
“Home.” 
“Wait! You have to meet Sohee first.” 
“I’ll be fine.” You say trying to get out the door."
“Just 30 more minutes please.” She begs, getting down on her knees but not letting go of your hand. 
You could argue with her, but one thing about Ningning is that she’s never lost an argument. So you take the easy way out and distract her instead. 
“Oh my god, is that Sungchan?” You spur randomly 
“You can’t fool me Y/N.” She looks at you unamused, but pipes up from the floor the second she hears a stranger from behind yell “Is that Sungchan.” 
You blink once and she’s gone, mixed in with the other crowds of people. And you take your opportunity to run away, grabbing the first taxi you see and heading back to your apartment. 
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The steam from your shower follows you from the bathroom into your bedroom when you sit on your bed. Drying your hair with a towel, you take a deep breath. This is great, it’s quiet and calm just the way you like it. 
That is until your four roommates come crashing into your room, screaming and squealing over each other and you can't even make out what any of them are saying. The only things you’re able to make out are something about fate and the Sohee guy that Ningning’s been telling you about. 
“Wait, one at a time.” You stand and hold your hands out. “Giselle first.” You add
“Who’s turn is it to cook tonight? I’m hungry.” She slurs and then walks out of the room before any of you can answer her question. 
“Okay… Winter.” You point to her when she holds her hand up. 
“HI.” She holds her hand over her mouth when she giggles. 
“Hi, Winter.” Her giggle gets louder when you smile back at her.   
“Sohee wants to meet you,” Ningning yells, not giving Karina a chance to speak. 
“I’m not interested.” You state, sitting on your bed. 
“Come on, please. Just once.” She pleads for the second time of the day. 
“No.” 
“He could be the one.” Ningning begs even more.
“I don’t think so.” 
“He’s cute and sweet and probably even romantic.” She adds
“Then you date him.” You mutter, laying down on the bed and closing your eyes. 
“He wants you.” She continues even though you’ve turned your lamp off and shifted comfortably under your bed. 
“I don’t want him.”
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Other than your bedroom the best place on earth is the library. An endless world of books and possibilities. The best part about it? It’s completely quiet and the librarian always gives you one of her home-baked cookies. 
Today the library is completely empty which means it’s even quieter than usual. The only noise is the traffic noise and the thunderstorm happening from outside. Which is even better for you because you know your afternoon reading session is going to be better than ever. 
Walking down the romance aisle, dragging your index finger down each of the books until you find the very book you’re looking for. The spectator in the painting: volume 7/9. 
You had spent the last four months binging the book after your favorite book blog suggested it. A story about a prince who falls in love with a violinist and risks his life to save her when she gets sentenced to death after treading too deep into the king's chambers. 
The series was astonishing, just when you thought you knew what was gonna happen next, Boom! A plot twist. 
“There it goes.” You whisper to yourself when you find the book on the top shelf out of place from where it’s supposed to be. 
Your heart drops when you hear a somewhat familiar voice. The library is dead silent so when the boy walks in with his green sweatshirt and crossbody bag you immediately break out of your world. Leaning over the bookshelf to see if the voice belongs to who you think it belongs to.
“Good evening, Miss Lynn.” The boy greets happily leaning over the counter. You can tell he visits the library often because of how comfortable he is, smiling and making jokes with the librarian. That doesn’t bother you, but what does is Ms. Lynn passing him one of her home-baked cookies and joking with him about how he shouldn’t tell anyone. just like how she does with you. 
You take that as a sign to mind your business, not even wanting to know who the boy is anymore. Except when you think to walk away the librarian points in your direction, guiding the boy to the sci-fi genre of books behind you. What’s even worse is the exact second the boy turns around you see that he’s exactly who you thought it was.
“Fuck.” you mutter under your breath and hide behind the shelf. Holding your book to your chest. You clasp your hand over your mouth. You want to stand there and take in the shock that your body just went through but you know the better option is to get out of there as quickly and quietly as possible without him seeing you. Turning on your heels and walking quickly out of the aisle.
You’re almost there when you hear the boy call out for you. 
“Y/n?” You know you should just keep walking away but you can’t. You stop dead in your tracks and slowly turn back to him. He strolls closer to you when he’s sure that he called for the right person. 
“How do you know my name?” you question, suddenly every crime documentary comes to mind and your heart is racing. He could be a stalker or maybe a murderer. 
“It was on your coffee order.” He answers with his usual smile. except this time it’s a lot more reassuring, no one with such an adorable smile could ever harm you. Right?
After a few seconds of silence, he points to the book you’re holding. “you read this too?” 
“No, I was just curious about it. But now that I look at it, it seems uninteresting.” You flip the book around as if you’re examining it. 
“I thought people usually started with volume 1.”
“Is this not…” You feign ignorance, flipping the book around to see that it says volume 7 as if that wasn’t the one you intended to read. “Oh I don’t have my glasses, I tho…”
You trail off looking back at the boy. “I don’t have to explain myself to you.” you scold him.
“You don’t.” he agrees while reaching for the book in your hand. “I don't think you’ll like it anyway, the main character is so annoying. she’s always so defensive.” 
Your first instinct is to defend the woman, even if she is fictional. “She’s not-“ but then you realize you’ve blindly walked into his trap.
“Whatever, just give me the book.” You mutter, pulling the book from his hand and walking out of the library. Not caring that he fondly watches you stomp through the library doors with the book still in hand.
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“Why won’t he leave me alone?” You dramatically yell upon entering your apartment. 
“Who?” Giselle pops up first
“he?” Karina comes out second
“No! no one can talk to you right now. You’re already taken.”Ningning runs out grabbing by your arm as if this was gonna protect you from the boy, who’s not even in the room. 
“taken?” everyone except Ningning calls out at the same time.
“By Sohee.” 
Instead of a verbal response, you just roll your eyes, Ningning was very persistent, you’ll give her that.
“Okay wait, who's the guy that won’t leave you alone?” Winter asks 
“The guy from the coffee shop. It’s like he’s following me around, first at the cafe, then at the party, and now at the library.”
“The party?” Giselle questions “Is that why you left early.”
“That and I didn’t really wanna see Karina making out with a bunch of different strangers.” You admit, subtly gesturing to her with your hand. 
“Fair” Karina nods 
“Is he cute?” Winter questions
“The contrary! ” You somewhat shout. You’re very driven and determined to prove that you’re not into this guy even though you know it’s a lie. “What's even worse is that he won’t leave me alone and he knows my name.”
“like a stalker?” Giselle suggests 
“Probably, this is why I hate men.” You throw your hands up
“But you’ll love Sohee,” Ningning adds.
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Some days go by when you don’t run into him. five to be exact but it wasn’t like you were counting. You didn’t wanna see him, but it was torture for you to walk into places and constantly look over your shoulder because you thought he might be right behind you. 
You’re sitting at the kitchen counter, head propped up by the knuckle of your hand. You’ve been up for hours trying to finish this paper for your biochemistry class, but you’re not making any progress. There were only two coherent lines written on the paper and a bunch of random letters that appeared when you slammed your head on the keyboard of your computer. 
“I am so fucked.” You mutter, head still stuck into your laptop.
Your head stays there just a moment. You just needed a small break, nothing serious, just a small moment to reboot your brain and give you maximum creativity and intellect. 
Except it wasn’t just a moment, you had slept through your first two alarms. Head popping the second your alarm begins to ring, immediately your eyes go to the time. “No~.” you groan frustratedly. throwing your legs over the chair and running into your bedroom to get dressed.
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luckily you had just enough time to get some coffee and this time you brought your card. You made sure of it. 
You walk into the cafe and stand behind the six people who are already in line getting ready to place their orders. Humming along to the tune that they have playing lowly from the speakers, you pull out your phone to kill time, going back and forth through your social media. Until it’s your turn to place the order. 
“Good morning, what can I get for you today?” You notice the barista is different from the last one and much more welcoming as well. 
“I’ll just take a small iced americano.” You say, pulling out your wallet to pay for the coffee. 
“And can I get your name for the order?”
“Y/n” 
“Okay, I’ll call out your name when the order is ready.” 
“Perfect thank you.” You nod and find a table to go wait, Although it doesn't take long for the man to call your name. You stand up almost as soon as you sit down, pick up your iced drink, and head to the door. 
Just moments before you reach the door another man walks into the small coffee shop. You can tell that he’s already preoccupied with his phone to notice that you’re on your way out. So you take the initiative to get out of his way. However, it still doesn’t stop him from bumping into your shoulder and knocking your (thankfully, iced) coffee all over your clothes. 
“Watch where you’re going.” He’s the first to yell, he doesn’t bother helping you clean up the mess he made, and he doesn’t even apologize. 
The asshole just walks right past you. 
“Do you want me to kill him?” “Ye-” You almost say “yes.” on instinct but ultimately refuse and turn around to face the boy behind you. Letting your shoulders relax when you meet his soft eyes and familiar smile. “No, it’s fine.” No matter how hard you try you can’t stop the smile that grows on your lips. Hurrying and looking down before he could see it too. 
“I’ll go see if I can get a mop.” he walks away too soon to hear you say “okay.” and you stand there waiting for him with a stupid smile on your face as if you weren’t just wishing he’d vanish less than a week ago.
You’re only able to pull yourself out of your trance when he finally comes back with the mop. You reach to pull the mop out of his hand so you can clean it up but he stops you. “I go this, you can just wait over there. I’ll buy you a new coffee.” As if you weren’t slowly falling for him already. 
“Okay.” You nod sheepishly, walking to where he guided you. 
You weren’t one to get flustered, and especially not by man. But here you were kicking your feet, blushing and giggling all because someone offered to buy you a new coffee. 
It takes only 9 minutes for him to walk back to you with a fresh cup of iced americano. “You didn’t have-” “I know.” he cuts you off, pushing the coffee towards you until you accept it. You finally do after a few moments of just staring at it. 
“Thanks,” you say last, receiving the cup from his hand and getting ready to walk away. He lets you make it all the way to the door before he calls to get your attention. 
“Wait.” When you stop and turn around he jogs towards you and wraps his jacket around you to cover up the coffee stain that you have smudged into your shirt. “Here.” 
You don't fight with him this time because you’d rather wear his jacket down the street than a huge coffee stain on the front of your shirt. “Thanks.” is all you say, as you smile at him one last time. Turning and walking out the door not forgetting to sneak a few last-minute glances at him through the window.
The walk towards your school was like straight out of a movie. You’re grinning from ear to ear, giggling to yourself, and dancing along the sidewalk. Not caring for the strangers that were oddly staring at you.
You could say the coffee gave you energy but really it was the owner of the green varsity jacket you were wearing. 
Then that’s when it hits you. You stop dead in your tracks realizing that you have no way to return the jacket after today since it isn’t promised that you’ll see him again. 
Without thinking much you turn around and run back to the cafe, fingers crossed that he’ll still be there when you get there
You end up back in front of the cafe, panting and puffing but you still shuffle into the small shop and begin frantically searching for the boy. 
He was already long gone, the cafe had picked up activity since you’d left but he was nowhere to be seen. 
You’d encountered him four different times and even managed to get his jacket, but you still had yet to learn his name. The only thing you knew about him was that he read romance and that he likes coffee, parties, and apparently the color green. 
“Whose jacket is that?” Winter asks from your bed, watching you cautiously hang up the varsity jacket in your closet. You hurry and close the door to restrict her view of the overgarment.
“I bought it the other day.” You spur 
“Oh please, that is not your style.” Winter teases when you continue folding all the rest of your laundry. 
“I just needed something really quick.” You miss when Gisselle goes into the closet behind you and pulls out the jacket. 
“This is a man’s jacket.” She calls out, “I can still smell his cologne.” 
“A man’s jacket?” Karina and Ningning suddenly appear out of thin air. 
Squeezing your eyes shut before shoving your face into the palms of your hands, you wish you could disappear right there and then. There’s no point in even trying to explain yourself. You doubt you’d even get through the story without smiling.
“Y/n honey, we need to talk.” Ningning reaches for your hand. 
“talk?” You ask but get ignored by all four of your roommates. Karina and Winter both guide you to sit on your bed for whatever it is that Ningning has to say. She holds your hand as she looks at you to say “You’re forbidden from ever seeing him again.”
You cry “Wha- forbidden. you can’t do this.” You look around to the rest of the girls to defend you but they do absolutely nothing. 
“We've already set you up on a date with your soulmate.” Ningning leans in front of you so you can turn your attention back to her.  
“soulmate?” You question first but then circle back to the bigger problem. “A date?”
“You’ve led us to do this.” 
“How is this my fault? I didn’t ask for this.”
“we’re worried for you, if you don’t start dating now then when?” Winter interjects. 
“This is absurd, I don’t need to date.” You argue but it’s of no use because you still end up at the diner where the girls told you the date was gonna take place. 
You’re not really dressed for a date, just a simple pair of jeans, some sneakers, and the oversized green varsity jacket that you acquired two days ago. 
Wearing another guy's jacket on a date wasn’t ideal but neither was going on a date against your will. 
It was by force obviously, you weren’t here because you wanted to be but because you had no other choice. Ningning threatened to burn all of your prized possessions if you spent less than 30 minutes with the man she’s been dying to set you up with. 
Quite frankly you were starting to grow curious about this Sohee guy.
“Table 4” You murmur under your breath, it’s not hard at all to find the table. You knew this diner like the back of your hand since it’s the place that you and your roommates used as a hangout spot since your first year of university. However, you begin to question yourself when you see a familiar face sitting at the table where your date’s supposed to be. 
“What are you doing here?” You stop and question. 
The bow stands up when he notices you approach him “I’m here to see you.” 
“You can’t be here, I have a date.” 
“With Sohee?” He asks, but it sounds more like a statement to you. 
You’ve seen this before. (not from personal experience of course.) You’re getting stood up by a man you’ve never even met. The funniest part is you never wanted to go on this date in the first place. “Did he bail at the last minute?”  
“I don’t think we’ve ever gotten a chance to properly introduce ourselves.” The boy speaks, 
“If he’s not coming we don’t need to waste our time, I completely understand.” You halfway turn to leave before he blurts “I’m Sohee.” He holds his hand out.
This was a twist you didn’t even see coming. Looking at him with his hand held out towards you, all you can think about is Ningning trying to convince you that you and him were “written in the stars.” 
“Oh, you’re Sohee.” You repeat followed by a laugh of embarrassment. “Sorry about that, I thought-” You’re getting ready to explain yourself but decided against it. 
“Do you wanna sit down?” Sohee asks, only after watching you stare nervously at the chair in front of you. 
“Oh yeah, that’d be smart.”
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Awkward is when you take ten minutes staring at the menu because you thought that would be better than staring at the boy in front of you. Taking your time to read the food items, ingredients, and even calories (which you couldn’t care less about.) Especially when you already knew what you were gonna order anyway. The same thing you always order, A burger with a side of fries and a lemonade. 
“I’ve never seen you this shy before.” Sohee interrupts your thoughts as he pulls the menu from your hands. 
“I’m not shy, I’m just trying to figure out what I wanna eat.” You spit, pulling the menu back so you can finish wasting time. 10 minutes down, 20 more to go.  
“I’m guessing you don’t go on lots of dates.” He continues. You wanna yell at him for talking too much while you’re trying to read, but you don’t. You don’t get the chance to, as soon as you open your mouth the waitress comes out with food. 
“We haven’t ordered yet.” You look up to the kind waitress.
“I ordered for you, I wasn’t sure what you might’ve wanted so I just got you a burger.” As if on cue the server places a burger right in front of you, with a cup of lemonade to match.
You wanted to hate him, but boy was he making it so hard.
“If you already ordered, why did you let me spend so much time looking at the menu?” You ask when the waitress leaves. 
“In case I got something you didn’t like.” He says casually, reaching for his fork. 
Either you're just very simple or he’s made to be the love of your life. it could be both. 
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“You didn’t have to walk me home.” You’re looking at the ground, watching how your footsteps are in sync with his. It’s pretty dark outside so naturally it’s colder, but for some reason, it doesn’t bother you. 
“I wanted to.” He says simply, and the look in his eyes tells you that he’s being sincere.
It falls silent again, still awkward but this time it’s a comfortable awkwardness. And now that you kinda got to know him you realize that he’s not nearly as bad as you thought he was. So much for first impressions. 
“We’re here.” You stop right in front of your apartment building, standing on your tippy toes and landing back on your heels.
He first takes a glance at the semi-tall building and then back down at you, who's trying to look anywhere else but him.
“Thank you for agreeing to see me tonight.”
“yeah of course.” You nod even though you were completely against the idea. 
“I had fun.” 
“Me too.” You nod again. 
“So I guess I'll just see you around?” You can tell he’s just stalling now.
“I’ll definitely see you around.” you giggle.
“I guess it’s time for you to go now.” 
“I guess so.” you agree 
“Well, goodnight.”
“goodnight Sohee.” you watch him walk away, but he’s taking his sweet time. dragging his feet along the ground the farther he walks away from you. You almost find it amusing how dramatic he’s being. 
As you get ready to walk in and you grab the ends of the jacket you're wearing you realize that this is the perfect opportunity to return it.
“oh, Sohee.” You only have to call out once for him to come running back to you as if he never left.
“yeah?”
“Your jacket.” He stops you when you’re halfway through pulling it off.
“Keep it, it looks good on you.” 
“Are you sure?”
“goodnight, Y/n,” He says last, walking away and leaving you with his jacket. 
“How’d it go? What happened? Isn’t he cute?” Ningning bombards you with questions when you first step foot through your door. 
“he’s tolerable” You kick off your shoes and throw them off to the side. Then you reach to pull your jacket off, sliding it down your shoulders and hanging it up once you reach your bedroom.
“That’s great, it’s an improvement.” 
“If you say so.” 
“Did he say anything about the jacket? I told you not to wear the jacket.” Ningning mumbles 
“I bet he smelled the other man’s cologne.” Giselle snickers as she walks by.
“He said it looks good on me.” The room goes quiet and everyone stares at you...” Ningning watches you, jaw slacked and dilated pupils. 
“Y/n has a boyfriend, Y/n has a boyfriend.” It takes them not even ten seconds to form a circle around you and begin dancing like school children on the playground. 
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Your favorite time of day is when the sun begins to set. When the sky is painted in shades of orange and pink the birds fly over the sky. Your bedroom is flooded with the natural lighting of the sky, matching the mood of the jazz you have playing in your headphones.  
For a moment you sit and gaze out of your window, observing the people walking the streets below you, watching the cars drive past and the trees that sway in the direction of the wind. All of these things distract and entertain you, yet they still remind you of the boy you're trying so hard to forget. 
You stand up and close the blinds of your apartment. Blocking out all light, your room drifts into complete darkness, with only peaks of light shining through the cracks. 
That’s how it stays when you walk into the kitchen with the rest of your roommates. 
‘Oh, there she is.” Karina dramatically announces your appearance when you shuffle into the crowded space. Taking a seat on the stool next to her. 
“How come you don’t talk to us anymore?” Giselle asks 
“You are being dramatic, we talked this morning.” 
“You only asked me if I knew what you did with that hideous green jacket.” She scoffs 
“It’s not hideous, you just have no taste.” You playfully scold. 
“Whose jacket is that anyway?” Winter speaks up, digging in the fridge to pull out the orange juice. Wincing when Ningning slaps her arm for drinking out of the carton instead of grabbing a cup like everyone else. 
“Mine.” You answer. 
“No but actually?” Giselle asks, just as curious as the rest of the girls who are all watching and waiting for you to answer the question honestly. 
“Some guy let me borrow it because I spilled coffee on myself.” You leave out quite a few details but you’re sure what they don’t know won’t hurt them. 
“Okay so wait? Some random guy gave you his jacket-” Winter starts but Karina finishes “And you accepted it.” 
“I didn’t wanna walk around with coffee stains.” You shrug. 
“This is great, this is great. You’ll just go downstairs and explain that to Sohee so he won’t get the wrong idea.” Ningning claps as she gradually gets closer and tugs at your arm. Completely missing how blatantly confused you are. 
“Downstairs?” 
“Yeah, in his apartment” She never stops tugging at your arm. 
“Wait, he lives here?” 
“Yeah? Unit 411.” Ningning finally registers just how confused you are. “Didn’t he tell you?” 
Instead of answering her question you run out, leaving her and the rest of the girls as puzzled as you were a few moments ago. 
Without thinking much you knock on the door, just to see if what Ningning said was true. But after you knock you start growing anxious, suddenly you can hear your heartbeat and your hands are frantically moving at your side.
In the span of 10 seconds, you check the unit number 12 times just to make sure that you have the right one, and you’re not knocking on someone else's door. Soon you start to wonder what would happen if someone else answered the door. 
Just when you come to the conclusion to bail, you hear the doorknob turn and the door opens to reveal the boy you expected to see.  
Unfortunately, now that you see him, you realize you hadn’t planned after this point. So you just stare at him eyes wide, unsure of what to say or do. You’re just as shocked as he is when he stares back at you with a matching expression. 
You clear your throat before you take the initiative to speak first. “Why didn’t you tell me that you lived here too?” 
He answers, “I didn’t wanna scare you.” 
“Oh… that makes sense.” You nod, looking down at your pajama pants and bunny slippers. 
“Do you wanna come in?” He holds the door open for you to accept his invitation but you shake your head and back up. 
“No, I can't, I have to~” You struggle to come up with an excuse. “Finish my laundry.” You finish, nodding as if that’s gonna make him believe you. 
“Okay, well, I’ll see you around then?” 
“I guess it’ll be hard not to.” 
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You were never too fond of men. 
While most people had a tragic backstory that led them to hate the things they hate, you didn’t. 
You weren’t crossed by a man in your past resulting in your blatant hatred of the entire species. Sure you’d had unfavorable interactions with quite a few men in your life, but that wasn’t what led you to dislike them. 
It took many years of observation for you to come to your conclusion on the male race. However it didn’t take long for you to learn a few things about them.
But the most important thing was, they were all the same. 
That’s what you thought for years, every man, boy, guy, or male is the same. Yet, you find that your conclusion might not be entirely accurate. 
Looking at Sohee you feel that he’s different from all the guys you’ve ever come across. He isn’t selfish, or obnoxious. He isn’t entirely full of himself. 
He’s actually sweet and easy to be around. 
Which was good for you because, since you found out that he lived within a few hundred feet from you he began to follow you around like a puppy. 
Whether it was walking you to and from class, or even showing up to your apartment with breakfast. 
It was off-putting at first, 
You mindlessly strolled down the hallway of your apartment building. You weren’t thinking of anything other than the leftovers you were gonna eat when you finally got home. 
Sohee however had different plans. The second you turned the corner you noticed him standing at your door with what looked like a bag of takeout. 
Your body goes into shock before you can even comprehend what you’re doing. You hide behind the corner. 
You think maybe that’ll buy you enough time to figure out what to do next. You take a deep breath before slapping your hand over your mouth. 
You take a look at all the options you have. You could either sneak out through the stairs or you could take your chances with the elevator and hope that the girls aren’t on their way home. 
“Who are we hiding from?” Sohee suddenly appears right beside you. Causing you to jump in horror, luckily you were able to come up with a lie on the spot. 
“I was just… looking for my earring, I think I might've dropped it.” You pretend to look around for a nonexistent piece of jewelry. 
“What does it look like? I'll help you find it.” Rather than making him help you look for something that you knew was never going to be found you concocted another lie.
“uh no it’s okay, they were getting old anyways.” You say, pressing your lips into a thin line. 
“Oh well, do you wanna have lunch together?” He grins, holding up the brown paper bag in front of your face.  
But over time you’d gotten used to it, and maybe even came to kind of like his dog-like personality.
“So you’re a man-hater” Sohee starts, despite knowing that you hated when people talked while you were reading. 
He’s not necessarily an exception but you don’t get as mad about it when he does it. You continue reading, but you spare a moment to respond to him. 
“I guess you can say that.” Your eyes are still glued to the words of the book. 
“But you like me.” He continues, you make the mistake of pulling your gaze away from your novel, meeting the annoying smirk he has on his face.
You open your mouth to speak but he beats you to it. “You do know I'm a man right?”
“Yes, I know you’re a man. I have eyes.” 
You watch his grin grow wider before you go back to reading your book. “And I don't like you, I just don’t hate you as much as the others.” 
You say, even though you're sitting in his bed, your hair pushed up into a bun and your glasses hanging loosely above your nose. It’s a Saturday night, you could be doing skin care with your girls or binging cartoons on Netflix. But you chose to be here, in his room spending time with him.
To him, that said a lot.
“Woah, so you're in love with me.” Sohee jokes partly.
“How did you come up with that?” You laugh, turning on your side to face him better. 
Sohee shrugs, “It’s a talent.” He wasn’t too far off. You often denied it whenever someone brought it up but if you were being honest. you were falling for him, faster and harder than you liked to admit. 
The more you resisted, the easier he made it. There wasn’t anything you could do, it was inevitable.
Almost as if it was fate. 
You laugh to yourself thinking about it, laying your book down and fully relaxing into the fluffy white pillows he has aligned on his bed. 
You’re fighting against sleep, trying your hardest to keep your heavy eyelids open. Taking long blinks until you finally give in and let yourself fall asleep. 
Sohee finally comes back with the water you asked him for but you’re already well into your slumber. He’s sure of it because when he gently calls your name all he gets in response is a soft snore. 
Rather than waking you up, he pulls your glasses off, closes them, and lays them on the bedside table. He leaves for a brief moment to get you another cover, laying it over top of you and turning the lights off so you can rest peacefully. While he took the couch for the night.
“Where were you?” Ningning scolds. Not even letting you walk all the way in the door before she starts bombarding you with questions 
“Do you know how long I stayed up waiting for you? I was worried sick.” She continues to yell at you when you finally squeeze past her and walk into the apartment. 
“You went to sleep at nine.” Winter exposes her
“I was worried sick.” Ningning repeats, swinging her index finger around. 
“I slept at Sohee’s.” You say almost in a whisper but Karina is somehow able to hear you all the way from her room. 
“What?” She runs out, “You slept at a man's house? With a man?” 
“Yes, and that’s all we did. So don’t get your expectations too high.” You scold, specifically pointing your finger at Ningning who’s bouncing with joy. You can already tell what she’s thinking before she even says it. 
“No, we didn’t sleep in the same bed,” 
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The rain outside sounds more like a hail storm than anything else. You just wait by the entrance of the school and contemplate if you wanna walk home in this weather. 
The sound of the heavy wind isn’t so convincing but the boy waving at you with a bright smile might be enough to sway you. 
“What are you doing here?” You ask, mindlessly walking into the rainstorm to meet him face to face. 
“I came to walk you home.” He responds, his smile unwavering. 
“You shouldn’t have, you’re all wet now and it’s cold you’re gonna get sick.” You’re scolding him but he’s still grinning at you like an idiot. 
“I wanted to.” Is all he says locking eyes with you.
The rain could be snow, the sky might be purple but his eyes, you’re sure are brown. A brown that can only be seen with the help of the sun. Now that the sun was nowhere to be found they were so dark it could be categorized as black. 
You find them the most mesmerizing at this moment. You’re staring at him and he’s staring back at you. That’s when you take the opportunity to see how his lips feel, closing in the space in between you that not even a drop of rain can fit through. 
Isn’t it crazy how love can be found in the strangest of places, who would’ve thought you’d fall head over heels for the weirdo you met in a coffee shop? 
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1moreff-creator · 1 year
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Trying to figure out the DRDT chapter 2 murder method, with evidence! (Theory)
CW: Murder, mentions of suicide, hanging, general brutality.
So, I’ve noticed a lot of people have given their predictions for the second case murderer, the motives and all that. This is obviously what most people care about, and I love reading predictions for it!
However, I am not most people. I also am really curious about the exact murder method.
You see, DRDT has consumed my brain mercilessly, and thus I have decided I can’t wait for the hiatus to end, and want to see if I can figure out the murder mystery with the clues we have. As a warning, this doesn’t actually help much with the culprit, but I will give my thoughts on that at the end.
I think a decent job! It’s not perfect, and I’m fully expecting to get a lot if not most of this wrong. I will be happy regardless of whether I’m right or wrong, so what matters is that I had fun thinking about it! Right? :D
This took me hours.
Spoilers up until Chapter 2 ep 11, and… further? Maybe? It’s just a prediction, but with evidence, so, you decide if you wanna read it.
Where we left off
The cliffhanger currently consuming me, as you may recall, happened just after David started his Tumblr sexyman arc, with Charles cutting in with just a fantastic line (“You’re out of your element!”). He says that, while trying to prove David’s innocence, he realized something bigger, before proclaiming he and Teruko fucked up.
As many have pointed out, Charles cuts in when David mentions the time of death, meaning he’s likely realized something about that.
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What Charles has probably noticed is that the note Arei received never mentioned if she was supposed to go to the playground at 7:30 PM, as the characters had assumed because of the fish and the nighttime rule for the Relaxation Room, or AM. The fish could have easily been kept in the water jugs found outside in a trash can, so it’s pretty feasible that the murder actually happened at 7:30 AM. Unfortunately, Nico, the only one keeping track of the fish, likely fed them before David went there, and thus before 7:30 PM, so we can’t tell for sure when they were taken.
(This is because Nico mentions they fed the fish after dinner, and they likely ate before David. Whit mentions having a ‘late dinner’ when he and the gang meet with Suspenders Man in the kitchen and send him to the fish, David even mentioning he wasn’t expecting anyone else to be there. Assuming Nico ate dinner with most of the class, they would have eaten before David went to the Relaxation Room, which we know was around 7:30 PM)
However, if Charles is only bringing the possibility up now, it’s likely the right answer. Also, as you’re gonna see, the murder method I believe was used requires quite a bit of setup that would have been easier to do at nighttime, without potential witnesses showing up out of nowhere.
Now, this is where I’ve seen most people stop. Content with knowing what the cliffhanger itself is about, they don’t think further into the murder method. But I will, because my life is extremely empty.
Let’s get to the evidence!
“Truth Bullets” (let’s pretend)
-First, the layout of the scene.
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(Ultimate Artist coming through-)
The exact position of things doesn’t matter, but it helps to visualize. The seesaw, to the dismay of Korekiyo stans, is unimportant and can be disregarded. Here are the takeaways:
•The ground near the entrance is scuffed. This heavily implies something went down in the playground, and we probably aren’t dealing with a crime scene switch.
•The fish, you should be acquainted with.
•The spinny thing will be important.
•Not pictured is a sand pit without sand. This isn’t important, but I do find it funny.
•Then, the swing set. I’d like to point out that the rope attached on one end to Arei has nothing on the other end, and rather remains there via a knot at the top of the swing set. This is important because of:
-Broken Neck: Arei’s neck is broken, alongside:
-Veronika’s Account: Although a hanging can cause someone’s neck to break, it wouldn’t happen to Arei if she were to be hung from that height. She would either need to weigh more, or fall from higher. Because the rope Arei’s corpse hangs from is tied with a knot, it can’t extend further than what we see, meaning she was likely hung from somewhere else (if that’s even her cause of death).
-Bound Wrists: Arei’s wrists were bound with duct tape at some point.
-Duct Tape on Spinny Thing: There is duct tape covering every handlebar the spinny thing has.
-Longer Rope: There was a longer piece of rope bundled up below the spinny thing. Teruko claims it’s a couple yards long. I don’t use that unit of measurement, but it sounds like it’s large.
-Flickering Lights: According to MonoTV, one of the lights in the playground was flickering. The way he acts when inquired implies this had something to do with the murder.
Going away from the playground now, we have the trash can.
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-The note: You know this one.
-Eating utensils, food, painting tools. Unimportant.
-Water Jugs: Likely where the fish were kept overnight. Notably, the handles are snapped in the middle.
-Needle and thread?: I’ve seen some people mention there’s a needle with a bit of black thread that none of the characters address when dealing with the trash. Personally, I think this isn’t going to be important, but I do have a place for it if it ends up coming up. That is:
-Ball of clothes: Charles takes this from the dress-up room. It’s apparently held together with starch (not an adhesive, just sticky, but sure), though I wouldn’t be surprised if it was actually created with the needle and thread. Again, I don’t think it’s important, but you can choose to believe it was used here if you want. It’ll make sense later.
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-The gym. I’ll be honest, this is the one thing I don’t know how to fit in. During the investigation, Teruko makes memory to how the gym looked before and after the Nico incident. I’m not great at Spot the Difference, but for the life of me the only thing I could see change was the missing fan and the missing ‘grippy thing’ on the pull-up bar. I don’t know how that would fit with the mystery, so I’ll be glad if anyone can figure something out.
-The motives: Not important for the method, obviously important for other reasons.
So, with the evidence laid out, what can we figure out?
Theory Time
When I said I spent hours thinking about this, I mostly meant running through several theories at once, trying to see which one made the most sense. I went to some weird places: from a crime of passion disguised as a suicide, to drowning her in the Relaxation Room, to somehow getting from the Movie Screening Room to the Playground (MonoTV had mentioned punching through the wall would get you there), to Arei herself being the one originally trying to murder…
But in the end, it was simpler. There are three important facts which help narrow down the options.
-Arei’s neck was broken. This eliminates simpler killing methods such as strangulation. Something happened which broke her neck, yet:
-Her wrists were bound. A broken neck is instant death, but Arei’s bound wrists imply the killer feared she would struggle. This eliminates a crime of passion. This thing was premeditated.
-The murder happened in the playground. The scuffed floor, broken light, duct tape on spinny thing and the other rope all make it clear. There’s no crime scene switching here. This eliminates stuff like the drowning in the Relaxation Room I mentioned.
All of this makes me believe that Arei was hung from somewhere in the playground, likely after the killer bound her wrists to stop her from struggling. The scuffed ground serves as evidence of an initial struggle. It doesn’t quite look like that, but frankly I just don’t know what could have caused the exact shape in the ground, so a struggle it is.
However, how? If Arei’s neck broke from her hanging, as per Veronika’s Account, she would need to be hung from somewhere else first, in a way that she either weighed more or fell from higher. Now, at first, you might assume that she had to be simply hung from higher, since it’s impossible to make Arei weigh more than she does. But what if I told you, there is a way to achieve that?
Enter: the water jugs.
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I don’t know about you, but the way those handles are broken looks to me like they were snapped too cleanly for human hands. It almost looks… like someone tied a knot around them, then exerted a bunch of force on the rope.
(WARNING: Geometric depiction of a hanging a bit below)
We know for a fact there are at least two pieces of rope: one longer, one shorter. It would be possible to tie the two ends of the shorter one around the handles of the water jugs, then tie the middle around Arei. Water’s pretty heavy, so the extra pull of the water jugs would exert an additional force to her body once she stopped falling, one which could serve as one of the reasons her neck broke.
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…Now’s probably a good time to mention, I have no idea why the killer did half the shit they did. I cannot explain to you why they would do this with water jugs. I’m just telling you how my brain’s interpreting this evidence.
However, this doesn’t exactly solve the height problem. You still can’t hang Arei from the swing set directly, as the jugs would hit the ground. It’s still necessary to hang her from higher up, although thankfully it’s easy to see where that would happen.
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Yeah, the railings of the playground. The problem, naturally, is how to get there. Or rather, how to get the rope there.
Well, here’s a question. How would you do something like that if it was lower down, but still unreachable? One answer is to try to throw the rope over the railing, so that one end stays near you, and the other, on the other side of the railing. Of course, that’s impossible with a rope of this length and a railing of this height, but the concept can still be used in conjunction with something else. Thinking about the other pieces of evidence we have, there is one that stands out as particularly strange, doesn’t it?
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Exactly. The ball of clothes. Because throwing a ball, especially one as light as this one would be, is much easier than throwing a rope, you can set up the hanging spot by tying one end of the rope to the ball, and throwing that over the railing.
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You might think it’s still too far up, but think of it like this. How far can you throw a basketball straight up? Probably enough to clear two floors, at least given enough attempts. The ball of clothes would have more drag, yes, but it would be lighter. Keep in mind the killer had all night to get this right, and they could have even climbed on the swing set if they needed a bit more height. It’d be awkward, but possible.
There is one more piece of evidence that makes me think this is the case. That is, the flickering lights.
The lights weren’t broken, but they did get fucked up. This is by far the clue which gave me the most trouble when thinking about this, since it just seemed so impossible to achieve. However, this ‘ball of clothes’ theory gives us a solid answer. On the way up, the ball of clothes may have hit the lights:
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This wouldn’t break the light, but it could displace it, causing it to flicker… or something like that. I’m sorta banking on J giving a proper explanation with her pre-established expertise, since I’m no electrical engineer. However, I see no other way this could have happened, so it’s the answer I’m giving for now.
So now we have the long rope on both ends, all that’s left is actually pulling Arei up. Except, that’s still quite complicated, isn’t it? Already pulling her up would take quite a bit of strength, but the main problem is the ‘going down’ part.
For Arei’s neck to break, she needs to enter free fall, then abruptly stop halfway. That would mean you need to stop the rope from moving on the way down, but how? Just using your hands is impossible, because you’d get burnt.
Enter: spinny thing.
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The duct tape tipped me off that this thing was important, and once the use of rope is factored in, my first instinct was to use it for a sort of pulley system.
Weave the rope through a few of the handlebars, then tie a knot around one of them. That way, if you make the thing spin, it will drag the rope with it, sort of like a roll of film in reverse.
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Then, once Arei reaches an appropriate height, you spin the thing the other way, letting her fall at full speed for a bit. When you want to stop her, you would just need to stop the carousel from spinning, which may take a bit of strength, but it’s perfectly doable.
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Now, this explains how the murder could have been done, but where does the duct tape come into play?
Yeah, good question. My best answer is that the rope somehow burnt a friction mark into the spinny thing, which the killer feared would give away their trick. After all, even if the duct tape is more noticeable, it’s harder to make a connection between that and the murder than a friction burn, which while harder to notice, would point more directly to the pulley idea.
Yeah, it’s not a great answer, and it’s frankly the part which still puzzles me the most, but it’s an answer, so I’m going with it for now. Open to change, though.
Notably, this is also the part of the crime where I feel the gym may come into play. Again, I have no idea what the relevance is, but if it has something to do with this crime and not just the Ace - Nico incident, perhaps the grippy strap of the pull up bar was somehow used to better grip the spinny thing’s handlebars for the pulley trick? Again, this is one piece of evidence where I could use the help.
And so, we’re done! Practically all of the important evidence was used, and I can’t find any contradictions in the reasoning!
Closing Argument
The killer first put water from the Relaxation Room, fish and all, in some water jugs before nighttime.
At nighttime, they stuck together Teruko’s and Hu’s old clothes with either starch or the black string. Going to the playground, they tied a long rope they got from storage around the ball of clothes. They repeatedly threw it up, until they managed to get the rope over one of the railings in the playground. However, on the way up, the ball of clothes hit a light and displaced it, causing it to flicker. MonoTV would later remove this light.
After that, they tied one of the ends of the rope to one of the carousel’s handlebars, possibly looping it around some of the other handlebars to make sure it would work as a pulley. The killer left the water jugs in the room, first tying a shorter piece of rope around their handles, and took the ball of clothes back to the dressing room.
After that, the killer wrote a note. They had overheard the Eden-Arturo-Arei situation, and used that to lure Arei out to the playground at 7:30 AM. She potentially arrived just before the killer, based on the scuffed ground being a bit far from the door, but the killer got there just a moment after, before Arei could understand the situation.
The killer overpowered Arei, scuffing the ground near the seesaw in the process. They eventually bound her wrists together, and wrapped the middle of the rope attached to the water jugs to Arei’s lower body. Possibly around her waist, as to prevent rope burn injuries from giving the trick away.
After that, they tied the unused end of the longer rope around Arei’s neck, and moved to the spinny thing. Using the grippy strap they got from the gym (maybe), they grabbed one of the handlebars and spun the spinny thing so that the rope was pulled in and around its handlebars. This also had the effect of pulling Arei up towards the ceiling.
Once Arei was high enough, the killer quickly spun the carousel the opposite way, then abruptly stopped it just a few moments later. This caused Arei to free fall shortly, before suddenly stopping. The force of that stopping broke both Arei’s neck and the handles of the water jugs. Arei died here, if she hadn’t already asphyxiated beforehand.
All that was left for the killer to do was cleanup. Retrieve the longer rope and hide it under the spinny thing; set up Arei’s body to look vaguely like a suicide; empty the water jugs on the ground; throw them away, alongside the duct tape and the note. The killer’s trick had also left marks on the carousel, which they decided to cover up with duct tape. Finally, the killer reconvened with everyone at around 8 AM for the motive announcement.
And with that, all questions are answered. Well, except for:
What the fuck
Like, why would the killer do this? It’s so unnecessary cruel, when they could have just hung her. I was honestly worried, as I thought about the method, that the killer would end up being Veronika, just because it’s so fucked I genuinely can’t see anyone else doing this. But Veronika doesn’t have a motive to do this: she’s talked about wanting to enjoy the trials for as long as possible, and it’s been set up if she murders, it would be of boredom. Doing that before a motive announcement which would make things interesting doesn’t fit her at all. Or maybe I’m coping.
The answer to the question of why the killer chose this method is only part of a larger question, though. So, knowing the method, how does that change the final question?
Who did it?
EDIT: DISCLAIMER: The following part of this blog is outdated. Go here to read a revised version of the method, with a different culprit. It's a reblog of thebadjoe's reblog of this post, as they pointed out a lot of flaws in my original theory (adult content warning for Arei's corpse). I'm leaving the rest of my original post up, but just know I now believe the killer to be Eden, with an accomplice.
Let me start by saying that I can’t definitively say anything about anyone, even knowing the murder method. However, this *does* paint some of the theories in a different light.
Smaller theories
I’ve seen a few people suggest everyone from Charles to J or even Arturo. A lot of these theories are decent, but some rely too much on certain assumptions which may or may not be disproven if this method is accurate.
Charles is ruled out. The murder required moving the corpse around postmortem, and while there wasn’t any blood around, Charles’ necrophobia would make it impossible for him.
A theory I saw was that J may have used her remote to open secret trapdoors and move around rooms, taking advantage of the placement of the playground in relation to the Movie Screening Room. However, while that theory is interesting, the murder is perfectly possible without these trapdoors, so the main argument kinda goes out the window. Although I guess it’s possible her remote could be used to make the carousel go spin, but that’s kinda ridiculous if you ask me.
Arturo was ruled out from the beginning because the handwriting in the note is too pretty to be a doctor’s. That’s a joke, and Arturo would actually be quite capable of the crime. In fact, he’s sort of become my second most likely culprit, even if he was accused early in the trial.
Hu / David manipulation, in shambles
A popular theory states that the killer was manipulated by David to do the deed. The most common victim of this manipulation theory seems to be Hu Jing. However, in my opinion, the sheer brutality of the method pretty much rules this out. David may be a good enough manipulator to get somehow to kill Arei, but I really doubt he’d be able to convince them to do… all this.
Especially since he has no reason to order the specific method, which would imply it was born from the killer’s own mind. So, even if David actually told them to kill Arei, they decided to use this insanely elaborate method all on their own. And, listen, I don’t care how you feel about Hu, she wouldn’t do this.
Is it still possible? Sure, I guess. Does it look a lot weaker under this method? Absolutely.
The surprisingly strong Whit/Eden allegations
I didn’t make this theory considering these two the killer, I really didn’t. I still don’t think they are. And yet, they are the only ones who could benefit from this method. How? The BDA.
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You see that loophole, right? I noticed the moment I saw the rule. The way it’s written seems to imply the BDA only plays when three ‘spotless’ see the body, ruling them out as the murderer. Except, that’s not how it’s worded. It doesn’t say ‘three non-murderers’, it says ‘three people who didn’t witness the murder’.
So, pray tell, what happens if the culprit has their back to the victim when they die? Simple; they didn’t witness the murder, so their eyes count for the BDA.
How does this help? Well, imagine if Teruko had been the one to kill Arei. By making a contraption where she can be sure Arei dies instantly upon something happening (in this case, abruptly stopping the spin of the carousel), she can make sure her back is turned the moment Arei dies. Of course, the moment she turns around, the count for the BDA goes up to one, but it doesn’t trigger, since you need three.
Then, when Teruko ‘discovers’ the body alongside Eden and Whit, the BDA plays; one person (Teruko) had already ‘discovered the body’, so Eden and Whit seeing it would increase the BDA count by two. That makes three, BDA plays.
And yet, during the trial, if the murder method hasn’t been found out, Teruko could claim she isn’t the murderer because of the trickily worded BDA rule.
Now, we obviously know Teruko didn’t do it, but Eden and especially Whit are common theories. This could be used as evidence, except…
There’s a pretty obvious problem there. It’s not them, but Teruko who asks to team up in a group of three for the BDA, and it’s also her who suggests going to the second floor. Then, the playground is the last place they check, and Whit even questions Teruko when she suggests going there (the infamous ‘hanging out there’ line).
I wouldn’t rule out Teruko’s bad luck making her pick the absolute worst possible partner possible, but that doesn’t take away from the fact that neither Eden nor Whit were proactive in the search method, which goes against this potential ‘BDA alibi’ plan.
As for the rest of the theories, I don’t quite believe them. Yes, Whit definitely has more issues than he lets on, but he has no motive to do this (remember; he asked an entire group of people to reveal his secret if they had it, so the only reason his secret lasted until the trial was Rose throwing it away). Eden even less so.
And in the end, it really is the motives which points us to what I believe to be the killer.
Yeah, it’s Levi
As does what I believe is most of the fandom by this point, I think Levi is probably the killer.
Many have already theorized about the remaining motives, so I’ll spare you the ordeal and tell you: Just with the information all the characters have access to, it’s possible to narrow down Levi’s secret to ‘murdered someone’, ‘poisoned competition’ and ‘dead family’ (I know the last one’s Xander’s, but the characters don’t really have access to the Bonus Episode).
However, Eden can eliminate the ‘dead family’ one, as Levi has talked about his family with her, and they’re not dead (He also mentioned having brothers in the present tense during the trial, but just in case).
Min’s Bonus Episode makes it likely her secret is the ‘poison competition’ one, though how the characters are gonna figure that one out is beyond me. The point is, Levi’s secret is the ‘murdered someone’ one, the one Arei had. And, listen, in-game logic aside, you don’t just give that secret to the victim of the case and then have it mean nothing for the murder.
Other suspicious behavior has been noted, such as him wanting to start voting time quickly when David did his thing, him quickly checking the motives when they became public (keep in mind, as some characters mentioned, it’s possible the killer thought just killing someone before the motive reveal would be enough to prevent it), etc. Also possible foreshadowing such as Ace claiming Levi could ‘snap [his] neck with his bare hands’ and Levi promising to protect Eden in the trial, which is exactly what Arei did before dying.
However, something I feel people overlook is that not only did Arei get Levi’s secret, but it was also Levi who got Arei’s secret. A secret which, keep in mind, wasn’t public knowledge until the trial, when Levi finally revealed it. Sure, David and Teruko knew, maybe Eden at best, but other than that, only Levi knew of that secret.
And this is where the murder method may come in. I’m still unsure. Because the only reason I can find for this amount of elaborate planning and brutality, beyond the BDA thing which I mentioned likely isn’t important, is the killer having a deep grudge against Arei.
Levi is a guy who cares about his family. Sure, he was disowned, but he claims it was good, because he and his family were ‘bad influences on each other’. He seems like he genuinely wants the best for his brothers, it just so happened that the best thing was going their separate ways.
So, how do you think he feels when he learns that Arei, someone who had already insulted and belittled him, calling him a pushover and stuff, did horrible things to her sisters? If he doesn’t have the full picture, it’s not impossible to see how that may make him angry at her, especially with his already established anger issues.
Not to mention, keep in mind the setup for the crime was done one night after the Nico - Ace incident, one which ends with Levi grumbling ‘why do I even bother?’ as he locks himself in his room. This could imply a complete loss of faith in the group in general, which could lead to him deciding to kill.
Of course, that theory has more holes in it than Swiss cheese. Levi’s outbursts of anger don’t really last long enough for it to explain such a long and elaborate murder scheme. Not to mention, if he really did react negatively to the motive, he’d have done it the moment he received it, not several days later. He has murdered without remorse before, if his secret is to be believed, but until we get the specifics, we can’t know for sure how okay he’d be doing something like this.
However, the important question Levi as the culprit answers isn’t the ‘why?’, but the ‘how?’.
I’ve sorta glossed over it until now, but it would take quite a bit of strength to stop the spinny thing in the trick. I don’t think Levi’s the only one capable of it, but he’s certainly the most capable, if that makes sense. Not to mention, actually overpowering Arei in the first place wouldn’t exactly be easy. Plus, the ball of clothes being involved implicates him in a meta-sense, as it could technically count as his talent being involved in the murder.
The problem, of course, is that I have no definitive evidence. His custom weapon, brass knuckles, wasn’t involved at all, and there’s no way to place him at any of the important scenes. No one has an alibi for nighttime, no one has an alibi for 7:30 AM, and pretty much no one has an alibi for the Eden - Arturo - Arei incident (afternoon of the day of Nico’s attempted murder, when for now we only know Hu, David, Nico and Teruko where talking in the Relaxation Room. Though of course, the exact time is impossible to know).
I suspect he’s going to be suspected for the motive and the strength thing, and either someone will come up with something incriminating, or he’ll make a slip-up a la Mondo. I have no idea.
So… what did we learn?
Kinda nothing. As you can see, the murder method doesn’t really point to a killer in any definitive way, so we’re just back where we started, basically. But hey! It was fun! I guess.
Now, back to crying over the hiatus. See you!
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