#i crave gay angst

[danieleatingbeans]

Song - Gnaw by Alex G

[hidedino]

just to clarify, literally the only reason why i think we're about to go through fitpac and ramón and fit angst is because fit had never directly involved other people in his qsmp lore before.

he's always done his main lore by himself and if other people were to be involved, it was just through him relaying information to them or within lore constructed by the admins and not himself.

so him mentioning how happy he was that ramón had started calling him dad and how he should probably have a talk with pac about their feelings before the main reveal had begun was already a red flag. but the fact that he'd even featured references to both of them was the most significant occurence because it signifies that they're likely to be directly involved with whatever takes place in this arc of fit's lore.

so fit not even mentioning or interacting with pac and ramón during that stream? complete calm, most likely no significant developments in that department.

but fit making clear references to the two characters in question and tying their presence in his life to a rule subtly forbidding him from forming any attachments? big bad, time to panic.

and i'll die on this hill because i need to see fit cubito suffer before he finds true happiness.

[f0r3v3rm0r3]

You guys have no idea how badly I wanted Chuuya to be a vampire. This all seems too convenient for Dazai, and yes I'd anything for the man but this doesn't add to the amazing plot they had.

I wanted that scene where Chuuya shoots Dazai and then gets free from his vampirism state and he's horrified and limps down to Dazai and clutches him tightly, shaking and asks him,

"Who did this to you? Did i do this to you? Get up mackerel."

AND THEN, I wanted something to happen that would save Dazai. I would have loved to see skk face the actual consequences of their actions.

[jackass-jones]

Actually cry so goddamn hard when I think about Shinjiro Aragaki healing and being loved and having to learn to be okay with himself and being taken care of

[dreareads13]

looove this hc so much!!

Sorry Rick, these two are my ocs now. I grabbed em. They're mine.

[defalltt]

Comfort Media Is A Horrifying Psychological Show. Mine Are Hannibal And The Magnus Archives. Lemme Tell Ya, I LOVE Some Found Family Horror Gays.

[starrywilliams]

guilty as sin? | abby anderson

“these fatal fantasies giving way to labored breath, taking all of me, we’ve already done it in my head”

warnings: masturbation, slight masochism, ruined orgasm, angst, perv!abby (a little), internalized homophobia (discussed in more detail below)

notes: no surprise my favourite ttpd song is the gayest one on the album, but guilty as sin? screams lesbian guilt i fear!!!! i’ve been writing this for over a month so i hope u guys like it 😭

cw: discussion of lesbian guilt & comphet - these are somewhat based on my own experiences with my sexuality and i absolutely!!! do not think a man can ‘cure’ a lesbian or anything similar to that. nor do i believe anyone should ever feel guilty for being gay. realising i’m a lesbian has been extremely freeing & dykes r the best x

wc: 1.8k

likes, comments + reblogs are greatly appreciated :)

the door slammed harshly behind abby as she stormed into her room. she pulled her jacket off desperately; her skin hot under its tight vice. she’d been in the gym, trying to work out her endless frustration of late, when you’d walked in.

you’d only said “hi" and smiled politely at her before setting your things down. but she felt her stomach churn, a black hole opening inside her. abby stood up, pulling the weights off the barbell and onto their rack. she grunted softly, glancing at you from the corner of her eye.

you’d started stretching, currently bent over as you touched your toes. her eyes drifted for an infinitesimal moment, locking onto the swell of your-. she looked away - wrongwrongwrong.

but then she looked back, her stare feasting on your body. she wondered whether you were doing this on purpose, trying to tempt her from across the room. she wondered if you knew her dirty little secret, abby picturing a smirk on your face as you mocked her for such indecent thoughts.

she didn’t want to feel this way. she didn’t want to feel the poison ivy swarming around her chest, getting tighter, tighter. the rash spread inside her; this invisible whip of lust lashing against her skin whenever your face appeared in her mind. well, had it been just your face maybe she wouldn’t feel like some depraved sinner.

now it wasn’t like abby believed in god, in a world where death and destruction infect every crevice you’d have to be mad to believe that any ‘god’ wanted its followers to suffer so greatly. but something inside her screamed every time she had these thoughts. these impure, twisted thoughts about you.

she didn’t know what made her feel like this. what made her resent you for simply existing; and what made her resent herself.

she recalled her teenage years, when manny had subtly suggested that owen liked her - so she was supposed to like him back, right? and she tried! she loved him even - but there was always that something, that feeling in her gut that told her that something was wrong, something about him that just would never sit right with her.

but all the other girls wanted a boyfriend too, and the jealousy was nice at first - she’d thought. after all, mel was the star student, a doctor in the making, her dad’s favourite; and nora was this freshly trained medical officer, and abby was- abby was just abby.

her dad began noticing her more too - previously too preoccupied with his firefly duties and his favourite student. now his little girl was slipping away from him, he finally began paying her the amount of attention she’d craved for so long.

before, their conversations had often drifted into talk of mel and her new achievements, or his hopes of a vaccine, or some animal he was tracking. never anything about his daughter’s life.

having a boyfriend made her interesting, it gave the other girls something to envy. which was a nice reversal, for a while. then her dad died, and she had become this object of pity. owen helped a bit, she supposed. he tried to distract her and keep her focused on their new role as soldiers, but she barely cared about him anymore. all she wanted was revenge, and with revenge, came you.

you were one of the gyms trainers, passionate about helping the members of the wlf stay fit and healthy! you’d helped her start lifting weights, squealed as she reached every milestone, and had remarked jokingly about just how much you loved her new physique.

it was innocent at first, the most being her brain going a little fuzzy when you’d bit your lip while spotting her; a slight blush when you’d hugged her a little too tight. then, once she and owen were finally broken up, these new pictures began hanging themselves on the walls of her mind. still, innocent, just slightly tainted with desire - the true nature of them still an avoidable matter for her back then.

when she could ignore the truth in her recent behaviour, abby loved spending time with you. after all, you were just really good friends! anyway, she’d had a boyfriend before so everyone knew she was normal, and absolutely not different, and she would never ever have to feel like an outsider.

yet it took a mere three months before she gave up on this foolish lie. she liked you, and as long as nobody ever found out, it wouldn’t matter.

but as her mind grew dark and twisted - joel a constant topic in her head as she obsessed over finally getting to enact revenge - her thoughts got worse in turn. she wanted you - filthily and desperately.

every gym session ended with another cold shower, a desperate plea for her body to stop and let her focus on the task at hand; a hopeless attempt to bury this ache into the ground; an endless endeavour to escape these urges for just one second.

but then she came back changed, every hair on her body endlessly erected with guilt. the way she’d killed him so mercilessly, the way it had done nothing to ease the pain, and the way you had tormented her mind ceaselessly throughout the entire trip.

maybe, had she never met you, she could’ve just killed him and been satisfied. maybe had you never offered to train her personally, she could’ve just stayed comfortable in that stuffy closet. maybe if she found the right man she’d stop feeling this way.

abby deemed such ideas unfathomable now.

owen made her feel nothing. being with him was like an eternal thursday, an endless wait for the week’s end and its pleasure to turn up at her door. every day she’d wait for some spark to arrive, the routine only becoming more and more tedious by the minute. but he helped her get people’s attention, which was enough when she was just abby.

but then she was abby anderson, top scar killer and isaac’s favourite. she got attention on her own, she was praised for her own accomplishments: people worshipped the fucking ground she walked on. but they didn’t know who she really was.

they didn’t know she liked girls the way she was supposed to like boys. she’d seen it in enough of those wlf movie nights - cruel jokes about anyone who even thought about being different. she’d heard the way people gossiped, “did you hear that they’re moving lesbians into the family unit? what a joke.”

they said it like it was something dirty, something egregious, something that she had to hate about herself. so she did.

but as long as she kept it secret, kept it locked away in her mind, maybe she’d be okay. after all, only your actions talk: it was the age old question really, if a tree falls in a forest and no one else hears it, does it make a sound?

abby fell back against her bed sheets, calloused hands pushing her cargos down to her ankles as she replayed the sight of you in her mind. bent over - she felt like you were trying to tempt her on purpose.

she felt like a heathen; staring, fantasizing, worshipping. her mind was bursting with the idea of every possible position she could put you in; head a chorus of every little noise she wanted to hear you make; eyes screwed shut as depravity filled her every sense.

she shoved her bralette up her chest roughly, fingertips dragging over her nipples with little mercy. she pinched them, the peach skin stinging underneath her touch.

she wanted it to hurt; wanted it to feel like some sort of punishment for her thoughts. but as her hips bucked into the air, a long whine dragging from her clenched jaw, she realised it needed to hurt more.

she imagined you, finding her like this. disgust burnt into your features - what the fuck was she doing? repeating your name like some subverted prayer, fingers harshly scratching along her stomach as she tried to make the pleasure feel more like pain, trying to induce some connection between the two.

if it hurt enough, would she stop? force herself to forget? could she torture this part of herself until it surrendered?

her hand slipped over the top of her boxers, a finger running tentatively over her clit through the now darkened fabric. she bit down on her lip, groaning against it as she pushed down harder and harder, attempting to break through the skin.

another finger pressed down, beginning to draw circles down on the throbbing bud. she jolted against her own touch, your head between her legs burning into her mind. your hands, trailing along her flesh - groping at her with little tenderness; tongue, swiping at her pussy with no intent of fulfillment: she wanted you to make her weep, smoke out her lungs with shame, deny her from gratification until all she could feel was regret.

she pulled away, only to cover her fingertips with her spit - diving under her boxers to continue with her corruption. abby let out a strangled sigh, hips grinding against her fingers as they toyed with her clit.

she moved a hand to her hair, knuckles stretching against her scalp as she began to pull her braid. she grunted, yanking even harder. she whispered your name: pained, hopeless.

she sped up her assault against her pussy, feeling that pit in the bottom of her stomach begin to grow. “pleasepleaseplease” her voice cracked as she begged, unsure what she was pleading for.

she wanted to stop, but she needed to try and make this feeling go away. she knew it would come back, it always did - but even five minutes free from your torment on her mind might save her.

her fingers kept going, drawing desperate circles against her weeping pussy relentlessly. the void was growing, almost consuming her entirely at this point. she thought of you laughing at her current state: a crying mess, pussy wet with perversion.

it was sick, really - how the idea of you hating her for this made her need even worse. you’d probably think it appalling: someone who was supposed to be your friend, now sat here burning at the thought of you.

a part of her wished that you shared this sickness. that you too let yourself be overwhelmed by the thought of sin. maybe you didn’t let the guilt swallow you whole - she hoped so.

but there was no point lingering in the what-ifs, they were far too fleeting.

her deft fingers quickened their pace, the ache all consuming. the climb began - a desperate jump towards oblivion. closer, closer. the flames scorched her bedsheets as her breathing hastened.

fuck, she hissed before reaching the apex with a scream of your name. a scream? a whisper? a thought? it didn’t make her actions any less deplorable.

her conscience grabbed pleasure by the throat as she ripped her fingers away, putting out the blaze on her hips like a cigarette crushed on the ground.

the desire imploded within the walls of her torso; scratching against her insides in the vengeance of her denial.

it was wrong; she had to stop it. yet still, the guilt poured into her lungs with no chance of resolve. she was a fool for thinking it would fix her. maybe next time it would work. maybe next time the exorcism would finally purify her.

until next time.

[simplynims]

I'd love to see you make a series for either or ngl, specifically for an M4M series since I feel like a lot of story driven audio roleplays are either M4F or M4A. As much as I adore the stories created for those demographics it'd be cool to see some more rep for men/trans men in the community!

I should just make an M4A or even an M4M epic. All of my M4A stuff is way sillier than my M4F stuff. Like I have no M4A equivalent to the tone and themes of Wolfsjäger, Blue Infinity or Matador Gothic. The New Jersey Rats, NiFODD, Sneaky Goblin, and Slash and the Basher are all fundamentally comedic and unserious.

I need to give something to the boys because they're missing out on a while side of my writing style you know?? I know only like 5% of my audience is male but still I give all my best "serious" work to the girlies and I need to feed the boys.

[buddierecs]

friends with benefits buddie fics

all explicit rating - 18+ only!!!! make sure to kudos/comment on these amazing works :)

stuck in fast forward (throw away the blueprint) by: extaiswings "frank gives eddie therapy homework, eddie misunderstands the assignment, and buck is just a really supportive friend...right?" word count: 42k important tags: idiots in love, pining, therapy, angst, repression, anal sex, oral sex, phone sex wishing to be the friction by: ipretendtobesane "the straight eddie friends with benefits fic" word count: 97k important tags: slow burn, angst, pining, internalised homophobia, porn with plot, blow jobs, hand jobs, rimming the last shred of truth in the lost myth of true love by: lemonzestywrites "after the events of 6x13, buck is worried he's lost his charm in bed. eddie eagerly offers his services to prove otherwise." word count: 25k important tags: porn with feelings, feelings realisation, getting together, anal sex all good things come to an end (but it's not the end) by: wafflesofdoom "craving intimacy during quarantine, buck and eddie strike up a friends with benefits situation. because it couldn't possibly go wrong." word count: 10k important tags: fluff, humour, non-explicit sex upon reflection by: jeremycarver "buck and eddie get into a friends with benefits situation that quickly spirals out of control." word count: 24k important tags: getting together, sneaking around, sharing a bed, internalised homophobia, blow jobs, hand jobs once, twice, right by: thatbuddie "buck and eddie try being friends with benefits three times during the course of their friendship. it works and it doesn't." word count: 13k important tags: minor eddie/shannon, minor eddie/anna, pining, angst, fluff, smut, love confessions you strip me down into nothing (show me what i've been missing) by: screamingcolours "eddie offers to sleep with buck ~for science~, they become friends with benefits, and eddie takes way, way too long to pick up on what it all really means." word count: 28k important tags: getting together, oblivious pining, light angst, demisexual!eddie diaz, anal sex, oral sex, hand jobs i like me better when i'm with you by: penofpisces "buck and eddie are in different stages of their life. one is newly single, fresh from his first same sex relationship, and the other is newly out of the closet. as they do with everything, they figure it out together." word count: 5.9k important tags: idiots in love, eddie diaz loves evan buckley, shower sex, breeding, frottage, intercrural sex except everything by: underhung_aura "buck and eddie become friends with benefits, get high, and confess their love in the stupidest and most endearing way possible." word count: 26k important tags: idiots in love, pining, plot what plot, boys in love, soft!buddie, pet names, recreational drug use, hand jobs, blow jobs, intercrual sex, come eating, praise kink my home is your body by: coldbam buck and eddie have vastly different nights at pride. then very similar summers. word count: 16k important tags: friends to lovers, jealous!eddie diaz, gay!eddie diaz, top!evan buckley, bottom!eddie diaz i'll show you mine if you show me yours by: goforeddie "that one time where dick pick, sexting, phone sex and a little bit of exhibitionism leads to buddie canon" word count: 12k important tags: sexing, porn with feelings, jealous!eddie diaz, mutual masturbation, blow jobs, public sex, hand jobs, horny!buddie in the night we trust by: glorious_spoon "eddie and buck start sleeping together when they're all stuck at buck's place during lockdown. it still takes them almost three years to notice that they're in love." word count: 29k important tags: idiots in love, sharing a bed, love confessions, minor buck/taylor, minor eddie/ana, hand jobs, blow jobs, anal sex

[muwapsturniolo]

𝑮𝒐𝒐𝒅 𝑳𝒖𝒄𝒌 𝑩𝒂𝒃𝒆 💫 Nick sturniolo (m! reader)

"i-i made a mistake, please, please just..."

✘ angst, i can't lie i had trouble writing this so I'm sorry that it isn't that good😭 i promise i will do nick justice next time, angst isn't my strongest genre.

It's dark in the bedroom, the only light being the moonbeams cascading down and illuminating a figure sitting on the edge of the bed.

He couldn't sleep, his mind toying with him and replaying his happiest moments that he took for granted and ruined - He felt guilty.

A soft shuffling is heard, his whole body tensing and his throat constricting. He slowly turns his head, his eyes landing on his sleeping wife.

She was a beautiful girl, she had a good heart and tended to forgive people too easily....and yet he found himself hating her

He knew it was wrong, the girl never did anything to harm him or make his life a living hell - He did that all on his own.

He was the reason he hates his life, not the woman he calls his wife.

He clenches his fists and faces forward, his eyes beginning to burn from the salty tears forming. He closes his eyes and lets out a shaky breath, his hands coming to his face as he rests his elbows on his knees.

"God, what is wrong with me..." He questions himself softly, the tears now running down his face.

He knew if anyone saw him they would think he was pathetic.

What kind of man sits on the edge of his bed in the middle of the night, head in hands as he cries next to his wife, all because he wishes he was with a boy?

A silent sob escapes his mouth as he recalls all the memories with him.

The day they met, the first time they hung out, the first time they got drunk, their first kiss, the endless nights of fooling around - He missed it, he craved it.

He couldn't believe he gave that all up to be nothing more than a husband in a picture-perfect American family.

He could hear Nick's voice as he replayed that day in his head.

"You can go and kiss 100 fucking girls Y/n, you can drink all you want and try to forget the feelings you have for me, but that doesn't erase the fact that you're gay!"

"I'm not gay Nick! I don't have feelings for you! This was a mistake o-A mistake? A mistake is spilling your coffee on your shirt when you're in a rush, not telling me you only want me to call you baby as your dick is shoved down my throat!"

The two males stare at each other, their breathing harsh as they try to come to terms with the end of their beginning.

Y/n sighs and allows his body to relax, "Nick...I'm sorry, ok? I-I...I'm sorry."

"Yeah well when you wake up regretting this choice, just know I told you so."

I told you so...

He was right.

He regrets everything.

His gold band glimmers softly in the moonlight, a reminder that he’s bound to a marriage that he doesn't even want.

He couldn't take it anymore

Without a second thought, he rips the band off, setting it on the nightstand and jumping up. He’s quick to change out of his pajamas, stumbling out of the house as he makes his way to the car.

His heart thumps loudly in his ears, his breathing erratic as he swings out of the driveway, heading towards his destination.

It wasn't long before he arrived at the infamous bar "Pink Cadillac." It was mainly known for being an LGBT+ bar, a place where people of different genders and sexualities could be with their own, and feel safe.

He hadn't stepped foot in this bar since that night, attempting to erase all the memories and a part of himself.

he sits in the car with sweaty palms, staring up at the neon sign as he debates going in.

he knew it was too late to back out, he already left her and his ring at home - He didn't have a choice anymore.

He climbs out of the car and slowly makes his way inside, the interior of the bar starting to look and feel familiar. He finds himself smiling as he sees pictures plastered on the wall from 7 years ago, recognizing the faces of his old acquaintances. He stops when he comes across a picture of him and Nick, the two of them smiling as they were crowned the kings of the "Pink Cadillac Prom".

He remembers that night as if it was yesterday, but he doesn't have enough time to dive into his memories due to someone approaching him.

"Look at what the cat dragged in! Long time no see Y/n"

He turns around and smiles softly seeing the familiar face of Damon. he was dressed up, makeup covering his face and his neon green wig laid to perfection.

"Damon...hey," Damon gives him a quick up and down before crossing his arms. "Didn't think I would see your face here ever again after that night..."

The smile on Y/n's face falters, his eyes now cast downward as he feels an ache in his chest. Damon sighs and drops his arms, pulling Y/n towards the bar.

"Whiskey coke?"

Y/n chuckles dryly, nodding his head as he sits at the bar. Damon whips up the drink before sliding it over to the male, Y/n taking a long sip before sighing. The two sit and talk, catching up on the years of missed events and laughing with each other over old memories.

It wasn't long before Damon finally questioned him, "What are you doing here Y/n?"

"I...I need to see Nick..."

Damon sighs and places his hands on the bar, "Y/n I don't think that's a good idea.... It was 7 years ago, you need to forget it, you're married!" Y/n shakes his head, refusing to give up.

"I-I'm not married anymore."

A lie.

A big fat lie.

He was still married to her, but he planned to get a divorce after tonight.

"I-Is Nick here?"

Damon stares at him for a moment before nodding, "he is, but Y/n I don't think you sh-Where is he?" Y/n cuts him off, eager to see his long-lost lover. He notices the tense look on Damon's face and finds himself begging.

"Damon, please... I messed up, I-I need to apologize and tell him I'm sorry.”

“He’s on the patio…”

Y/n has never moved so fast in his life, maneuvering through the bodies of dancing couples and heading straight towards the patio exit.

He makes it outside, his eyes darting around before they land on him,

Nick.

It was like a scene out of a movie, the fluorescent lights shining on Nick's face as he laughed loudly with his friends, unaware of the person walking up to him and prepared to spill their heart out.

"so I told hi-Nick?"

The shorter boy whips around at the familiar voice, his brows furrowed in confusion.

"Y/n? What are you doing here?"

he goes to answer but stops seeing Nick's friends looking at him, "Can we talk...In privet?"

Nick scoffs and sets his drink down, "No, I don't want to talk to yo-Nick please...?" Nick stares at him for a moment before sighing and standing up from the table. He walks off, motioning for Y/n to follow.

The two boys stand off to the side of the patio, hidden from the curious eyes and in their own world.

"Speak, what did you want to talk about?"

Nick's dismissive tone was expected, Y/n had hurt him. However, Y/n couldn't help but be hurt himself.

"I... I miss you."

Nick chuckles and shakes his head, " Nick please! Just hear me out! I'm sorry ok? I fucked up, I fucked up big time, I know that. I-I hurt you and I'm so so sorry."

Nick can see how distraught the man is, the bags under his eyes evident and the tone of his voice proving such, but Nick doesn't feel bad at all.

He felt smug.

He knew Y/n would come crawling back, claiming he was sorry and crying because he knew he was lying to everyone and himself when he claimed he was straight and getting married to a girl.

"I hate to say it, but I told you so," Nick states, his arms crossed right across his chest. Y/n couldn't even be mad at the words thrown in his face, he knew Nick was right.

"I-I know. You were right, you are right. I-I was struggling Nick, I-I'm-" He struggles to find the right words to express his feelings and thoughts.

"I'm sorry...What we had wasn't a mistake. I did - No I do, have feelings for you. I was just scared Nick, it was one thing to be gay in private with our friends here, but it was another for me to be gay in public, and I'm sorry. I'm so fucking sorry for being a coward and lying to you and myself-" Y/n moves closer toward Nick, slowly trapping him between his chest and the pink-painted bricks of the club.

"-B-but I can handle it now, I-I want to try again...I want to try us again." Nick begins to look uncomfortable, the words and closeness of Y/n being too much. Nick gently pushes him away, his mouth dry as he tries to speak.

"Y/n...."

The taller male could already feel the tears forming in his eyes, he knew by the way Nick pushed him back and said his name that he was being turned down. He shakes his head, pleading softly with Nick as he holds his arms tightly.

"Nick please"

"Y/n let go..."

"Please just give me a chance!"

"Let go!"

"I-I made a mistake, I just-"

"I'M ENGAGED !"

Silence stands between the two, Nick looking away awkwardly as Y/n feels the bile rise in his throat. He's lying, he has to be lying. There's no way he was engaged...Right?

"W-what?"

Nick holds up his hand, "I'm engaged Y/n.... "

he looks at the shiny diamond ring, the ring reminding him of the one currently on his nightstand.

"D-don't say that...D-don't marry him, please!"

Now Nick was angry.

How dare Y/n show up and expect him to forgive him right away and live happily ever after. How dare he demand that he not go through with the marriage.

"That's rich coming from you! You're a fucking hypocrite Y/n, you left me to get married to a girl! A girl! Now you're telling me not to get married to the person who helped put me back together after you broke me?! Fuck you!"

"I'm not married to he- I don't fucking care Y/n!" Nick shouts. He sighs and removes his glasses, rubbing over his face in annoyance.

"Look... I'm happy now Y/n, I actually love myself now to not keep up with your bullshit. You coming here was a mistake....Go home."

Y/n swallows harshly as Nick's words hit him harshly.

He was right once again, this was a mistake.

"I-I...should go...Sorry for bothering you...'' He whispers softly, slowly backing up before turning around and starting to walk away. Nick's voice calling out for him makes him stop, hope filling in his chest.

"I'm glad you finally stopped lying to yourself...I hope you find the love you deserve...Good luck, babe."

Y/n smiles faintly despite feeling like shit. With a heavy heart, he leaves the bar, his whole body feeling numb as he drives back home.

He silently walks through the door and throws his keys back in the bowl, dragging his feet against the carpet as he enters the bedroom.

She's still sleeping.

He strips himself of his clothes and slides the gold band back on his finger. As he climbs into the bed, she awakens, her eyes fluttering open softly.

"Babe? Where did you go?" She questions.

"Needed some water...Sorry for waking you." He lies effortlessly. She hums and curls into his body, missing the grimace on his face due to the darkness of the bedroom.

"I love you," she mutters as she begins to go back to sleep.

"Yeah...Love you too...."

Another lie.

[diodellet]

omgggg i didnt expect it to be here so soon i need to savor each line🤤🤤 there are so many good bits here i need to turn over and over again dont mind me enjoying my food

Too Little

Part three of Jamil (not) dealing with feels here we go. Jamil x reader, Jamil’s pov Previous parts: part one, part two

This was stupid.

Here he was, rolling around in bed, unable to sleep because thoughts of you filled his mind.

It had been futile of Jamil to think that he could simply brush your presence aside, that he could treat you like just another schoolmate and not let you consume his mind. 

Not when every quiet moment had him reach for his phone in hopes of a new message from you.

Not when you kept on finding new ways to make his heart skip a beat every time he saw you.

Not when he missed you more acutely every time you weren’t there.

So, despite his best efforts, his mind treaded those same paths, time and again, occupied by all the parts of you. Your expressions, your mannerisms, your words, every single detail committed to this memory and played over and over.

He suspected that at this point he’d be able to recreate most of your expressions just from memory. Your voice, too, playing so clearly in his mind.

Not to even mention those oh so tantalizing what ifs, supplying him with even sweeter temptations than the confines of reality and memory could provide.

What it would feel like to touch you, to hold you, to kiss you, to-

No. No no no. He would not go there.

Jamil could feel the heat burning in his cheeks and he rolled over, groaning into his pillow.

This was ridiculous. Absolutely preposterous.

Yet, there was no getting out of it.

He wanted you.

He wanted more of you, so much more than what he had.

Because each taste of you left him craving more, each glimpse made him want to uncover everything there was to you.

Even the parts you might consider ugly, as sappy as that was.

What kind of people did you like, anyway?

Charming? Intelligent? Funny?

Rich and influential? 

Did you even like guys? Or relationships in general?

Just the thought - relationship - made Jamil's cheeks burn even brighter, made his legs twitch under the covers.

Yet, somehow, it did not sound so bad.

To have you.

To be yours.

To know and be known.

He huffed and turned over onto his back.

As if his duties left room for something for himself, left enough of him to share with someone like that.

And would you like what you saw in him, anyway?

Yet, his excuses were beginning to sound more and more hollow.

After all, he was nothing if not resourceful, and so far you’d shown no signs of shying away, even as you dug your way deeper.

Jamil stared at the canopy over his bed with unseeing eyes.

He’d have to do something about this.

Because if he didn’t, he might just lose his mind.

But was the alternative any better? Could he even handle it? The full force of you, if - and it was a big if - you were to accept him.

Even now, when you looked at him in that particular way of yours… He never could hold your eyes for long when that happened. The softness and the warmth he saw were far too overwhelming, always forcing him to turn away lest he made a complete fool of himself.

If he were to have that, with the full force of affection intention behind it… How could he even bear it?

Like the other day… You’d found Jamil in the middle of his chores and dragged him away, his to-do list crumbling when you grabbed his hand and led him outside.

He was all too aware of how his protests had been half-hearted at best. How your sudden appearance, your touch had shut down every sensible part of him, leaving him unpleasantly raw.

And by the time he’d gathered himself, nearly convinced himself he had other things he should be doing instead, you were sharing ice creams outside Sam’s, to celebrate the first warm day of the year.

As if it wasn’t warm in Scarabia year round.

As if he hadn’t been too preoccupied by your happiness and enthusiasm to bring himself to heel.

Sometimes, it was all he could do not to be swept away by you, barely keeping his head above the surface.

So, what choice did he have but to act?

You’d made a home in his heart already, whether he asked for it or not.

All he could do was take control of what he could.

Oh dear I'm starting to get tempted to write this from the reader's pov as well. Or maybe I'll just have to ramble about the thought process behind this at some point to get that out of my system. I also considered going to a more horny direction with this but decided to go with this kind of yearning in the end. But, if the horny version is of interest for y'all, maybe I can do that as an alternative / supplementary thing to this series, or some sort of a standalone at some point. Hope y'all enjoyed! One or two more parts are still to come. Tag list: @colliope @crystallizsch @diodellet @jamilsimpno69 @jamilvapologist @mazapanmiau @perilous-pasta @twstgo If you'd like to be tagged for any future works, do let me know! Also feel free to specify if you only want tags for particular kinds of works (like sfw/nsfw for example).

[physalian]

13 Ship Dynamics I Crave

And I want to know yours as well. Most of these can be read completely platonic, btw.

“You make me a worse person, let’s be irresponsible together.”

“You make me a better person, holy fuck how did I dupe you into loving me?”

“Nobody fucks with you but me.”

“I’ve been lying to everyone and the mirror, but you see through my ruse, and I hate it.”

“I can fix him!” *Actually does and he takes some accountability

“I am Angst and Loner and Quiet Mean Guy. Except for this lil’ puffball of joy.”

“They’re a badass warrior with ten thousand titles and I’m their adoring support who no one will remember but them.”

“Pfft, a whole army, you say? Bestie and I got this, 800 to 1, let’s gooooo!”

“I hate him. I loathe him. He’s insufferable. He’s incorrigible. He’s—fuck.”

 “I don’t even know who you are but in an alternate universe we’d apparently have a gay ol’ time.”

 “They’re the ship’s fearless captain and I’m the silent badass second-in-command.”

 “Well, we had a shared brain cell, but they dropped it with their shoe down the sewer grate."

“We’re the two over-worked and under-paid hearts/healers and the only person keeping the other alive most days.”

[respectthepetty]

Pride Petty Watch (SOTUS) 4/5

I'm watching the blacklisted shows I was supposed to watch during Pride: Love in the Air, The Untamed, and my (former?) sworn enemy, SOTUS. I've made it halfway through SOTUS (first, second, third), and barely remembered EVERYTHING about this show once I hit episode nine, so now I'm hauling ass through the remaining episodes because Arthit is wet, stressed, and sexually repressed (just how I like my men), and I know what's coming. The Obama 'Hope' poster can't save him now.

Barack, we're really in the angst era now, and I'm living for it!

Kong has been in his feelings all day that Arthit likes a girl, but the sex gods have thrown him a lifeline in the form of crappy plumbing. Before crappy plumbing was invented and pipes starting bursting, how were the gays forced to sleep together in the same bed? Plumbing was a huge plot porn in porn, so I don't think we give it enough credit for helping people get laid.

And, of course, the first thing Kong does once Arthit is in his apartment is he feeds him, so he can get lectured about his baby taste, and he gives him pink milk to signal that the BL part of this BL is about to explode!

We done been knowing that Kong wanted all of Arthit's attention which is why he is constantly pissing Arthit off (itty bitty masochist is a problem if he doesn't have someone controlling him), so I'm glad he confessed to that quickly and without shame.

Since I'm watching this show through a kinky lens rather than strictly a BL one, I truly don't think Kong realized he had feelings for Arthit until he was asked. I think that up until this point, he just craved the punishments and the attention that came with it, and now that'he is being ask if he likes Arthit, he is slowly understanding that he actually does like Arthit and not just what Arthit does for him (punishes and controls him). I am so fucking invested!

I'm not being ridiculous about this either because Arthit tells Kong to stop smoking, and Kong simply says that he'll stop. Kong needs this kind of attention. He needs to be told what to do and punished when he doesn't. The way King dresses tells us that he likes structure. He only has a few items in his fridge. He likes order. As messy as Arthit might be, he is great at providing Kong exactly what he needs.

Ten episodes in and I am losing my mind over this show! I know I did not have this much fun with it the first time around, and even though those first eight episodes were stale, these past two are checking off all of my favorite things: not-date date, forced proximity, sleeping confession, AND ARTHIT IS AWAKE! This show walked, so the bed scenes in The Time of Fever and The On1y One could run.

And now Arthit is avoiding Kong! I am being fed so damn well with this episode. This is peak cinema! And to make it all better, Arthit is in Kong's phone with a little sun next to his name because Arthit is warmth to Kong, yet giving him the cold shoulder now. The beautiful irony!

Perfect time for my ghost ship to pop back up! M looks so hurt that Kong won't tell him what is wrong! He is even more bothered that Kong wants to be alone and is snapping at him. Even if these boys couldn't be romantically together, they really are good friends.

As a fellow slut, my answer to this question has always been "more than 100, less than 1,000' regardless of the actual number (because who can remember?), so Tuta is answering exactly how all queer sluts answer, and I have never felt so represented in a BL in all my years of watching them.

TOPTAP! Now that I remember watching this show, I know I didn't see this interaction as queer the first time around, but now . . . I think Arthit had stronger feelings for Jay rather than Namtan. And this isn't a Kong x M ghost ship kind of thing either. There is tension in this scene, and it's radiating from Arthit.

Namtan is scary because she sat there for FOUR HOURS and now that Jay finally showed up yet completely forgot their three-year anniversary, she just keeps smiling through the entire exchange. Girl, stop that creepy ass behavior! Just grab a knife and stab him already.

I'm upset that Namtan basically called Arthit just to complain about her boyfriend, but I love that Arthit has turned this shit show of a conversation around and is now complaining swooning about Kong being an itty bitty masochist who keeps provoking him as a means to get his attention.

Arthit is sooooo close to the truth here. Kong does want to be a pain in Arthit's ass in more than one way. Arthit isn't imagining this. Kong actively wants it and has made that part clear.

I do not like Namtan. She needs to go worry about her failing relationship and leave this emerging bisexual alone because pink IS Arthit's color, and this pink milk business is the perfect metaphor for his (repressed) queerness since some people are chill about it and others like Namtan always got some dumb shit to say about how they don't expect it from him. Queerness comes in all shapes and sizes, Namtan!

Lord, now he is hiding behind the curtain while he basically tells Kong that he will continue to avoid him for the rest of their lives. This is so delicious! I cannot believe I had to make it through eight whole episodes before I got to the good and juicy center of this story!

Arthit opened this can of worms when he asked Kong if he had feelings for him. Before that, Kong was just going along with whatever because he simply liked the way it felt, but now he realizes what those feelings mean, and boy oh boy, I'm having the time of my life!

AND NOW KONG IS TAKING OFF THE STRING BRACELET! Tian from The On1y One and Kong are the same text but different fonts. Nerds and their fucking string bracelets are out to get me in my feelings. Alexa, play Ariana Grande's "One Last Time" so I can cry while I dance!

Okay, Ms. My Love Mix-Up, I know this is Kong's name in Thai but . . .

It now looks like a "W" since she has used it so much which means it's an upside down "M" and if that was intentionally, that is genius of the show. Props department earning its paycheck!

I believe 2016 was still during Off's "dark days" (when he was kind of a jerk), so having his character constantly being the one to scream "fag" is really doing something to me. I don't even understand Thai, but I just feel like he is saying this with too much enthusiasm for my liking. I know it's a character, but if I had tried to rewatch this show before Cooking Crush and The Trainee came out this year, I would've walked away with some grudges against Off, the actor. I'm going to sit in this feeling for a bit.

Kong threatened to make Arthit his wife and now Tuta responds to Bright's homophobic comments by stating he will make Bright his husband. I do not like the implications or that a product placement has been roped into this. This is not the vibe, and I would like to return to my angsty homphobe-turns-into-a-homo plot immediately.

Yes! This is exactly what I need! Kong sitting alone in the place he was punished by Arthit and thinking about those moments fondly while Arthit is experiencing a crisis as he is being questioned if he likes girls or boys. This is how you do flashbacks people!

I wrote briefly before during The Eclipse that the pink milk in this show was an entire character all on its, but rewatching this show has really made me appreciate just how well done all of this was. The conversation with Knot is about pink milk but the pink milk has been the perfect symbol of Arthit's queerness at every angle. He doesn't really hide drinking it because it's just part of him, but once his friends (the people he think accepts him) start commenting and teasing him for being a guy who likes it, he starts to hide it, and even when he tries other things, he doesn't like them as much as he likes the pink milk. I guess we needed the first eight episodes to lay a solid foundation, so I could be losing my mind in the last half.

The way these two best buddies are talking about THE friends-to-lovers issue while not naming names has me holding onto the last bit of my sanity. Once the feelings spill out, they can't be shoved back in. It changes things.

(which is why y'all should just get together!)

May getting hit by a ball had me crackling at three in the morning and was exactly what I needed in the midst of all this angst. God, how did this show win me over like this?!

M is giving May the same looks that Home gives Peach in Peaceful Property, which means New is showing the characters' love the same ways, so HOME IS IN LOVE WITH PEACH AND NEW IS PLAYING IT AS SUCH!

Arthit is now thinking about Kong giving him his heart on the beach and let me state it again - THIS is how you do a flashback people!

Kong walked away from the pink milk, so Arthit could have it, and I've never seen a boy look so miserable drinking his queer little drink.

EPISODE THIRTEEN, I NEED YOU RIGHT NOW!

[spnfanficpond]

December 2024 Angel Fish Awards

(Angel Fish design by @slytherkins!!)

Every month all of you fantastic writers work your asses off to post some truly incredible stories. Our Angel Fish Awards are the way for all of us, as a community of writers and readers, to lift each other up and give praise to those who have captured our attention and deserve a few kind words. (Click here to learn more about how to nominate a fic for an award!)

Nominated by @charliethealpaccaso

All That We See Or Seem by xWitchAlchemistx (AO3)

Seeing a Sam shifter fic is just what I think is a rarity in this fandom and I thought this would be a great one for everyone to read.

~*~*~

Nominated by @heavenssexiestangel

Chef's Reward by @leatafandom

I'm gay. Gay for Debriel. And also I can't give coherent comments about this but it's SO them and aaah the softness in the last part and how they clearly love each other but won't say it and argh these two idiots will be the end of me. Anyway, go read Leata's works! They're great and she deserves more attention.

~*~*~

Nominated by @ladylilithprime

How Long Do You Want to Be Loved by rodiniaorzetalthepenguin (AO3)

I love Sam and I love Raphael and stories that explore Raphael healing from their own trauma that put them in a place where they wanted everything to end, and Sam helping them heal while Raphael also helps Sam heal from the crap he's been put through and just sweet tender moments and AAAAAAAAAAAAAH!

~*~*~

Nominated by @leatafandom

Into The Green by sallyamongpoison (AO3)

This story is just fantastic! It is an amazing case fic filled with foreshadowing, growing closer, dealing with trauma together, and growing closer though it all. The angst and comfort is just magnificent.

Blood Stained Gold by Gitten (AO3)

Adore the art and this story both are so fantastic. The journey was just incredible, I loved the trials and the concept as a whole. Sam working through his trauma, even if he doesn't remember the experience, and becoming better for it. I adore seeing Gabe as well helping out and their dialogue was really on point. This was a magnificent and compelling story. Definitely a reread. ❤️❤️

~*~*~

Nominated by @masoena

The Choiceless Hope - Fic by: @amypond45 | Art by: @morokollisyo

The premise is intriguing to begin with and the author did a fantastic way of representing Sam’s grief for Dean and realistic aspects of grief sprinkled into it. It made me cry in a number of spots and then there is the amazing art from morokolli to illustrate a number of the different Deans.

Jack The Cat by TammyRenH & kelios (AO3)

Dean as a cat or either brother as animal shifter is my kinda trope. Loved this adorable meet-cute with a Jared who found his backbone towards his no-good ex. Well written and such a feel-good fic.

Once Upon A Blood Moon by @samanddean76

A fantastic vampire SPN RPF J2 fic featuring a crude, sassy Chad as a sidekick. Jared realizes that Jensen isn't just another meal for his blood cravings. Made to a beautiful art prompt by jdl71/jld81.

All The Troubles In My Mind (They Don’t Feel So Bad) by @runawaydr3amerao3

Someone recced this fic on Discord, I have 100% read it before and it is an amazing SPN/SPN RPF crossover starting out with Dean meeting Jensen at a coffee shop in LA. The writing is detailed, engaging, plotty, smoking hot and has humor sprinkled into it effortlessly.

~*~*~

Nominated by @rubyvhs

Midnight Espresso—verse by @zepskies

The writing is so beautiful and so easy and fun to read. I love the angst in the series but also the lovey-dovey moments between Dean and reader, they’re so cute together and it’s one of my favorite series on tumblr!

you always meet twice by @chevroletdean

I loved Dean’s reactions to reader and how flustered he got around them. I enjoyed everything in that fic, it’s one I reread constantly because it gives you that little pit in your stomach when he thinks it’s the wrong number and reader has no idea, and then I’m smiling again when she tells him to call.

~*~*~

Nominated by @spn-fanfic-reblog-writes

Yes, Sir by Nachise (AO3)

Highly recommend. Yes, it’s omegaverse but it’s so cute at the ending too. Oh, love how Cas isn’t seen as intimidating and how Dean is the actually the front man. They’ve also been in love since middle school. It’s adorable!

(Divider by @glygriffe)

THANK YOU ALL, KEEP UP THE AMAZING WORK, AND AS ALWAYS, HAPPY WRITING!

- From your Admins and Manta Rays, @mrswhozeewhatsis, @mariekoukie6661, @thoughtslikeaminefield, @heavenssexiestangel, @spn-fanfic-reblog-writes, and @manawhaat!

[froidefille]

Day 23: a crossover or AU fic

📚 All These Winding Threads by Anonymous

Draco/Harry, 35k, E

written for @hd-erised

Summary:

The tides of Draco’s accidental magic pull him under and leave him gasping. There’s a hungry ache that sits deep in his bones, growing worse every day. Soon it’s all he’ll be, a starving skeleton clawing at its throat. He needs a solution. Unfortunately, that solution looks an awful lot like Harry Potter.

I hope to God that Hogwarts Eighth Year counts as an AU because I just HAD TO include this fic. And while it’s still anonymous no less!

As you know from my day 7 rec I absolutely adore bond fics – and this one de-li-vers. It has all the elements of the trope – the forced proximity, the resulting change of dynamics, the h/c in between, the yearning later on!

The boys are actually pretty mature in this characterisation so they get over themselves relatively quickly (not without hiccups of course, not with our Harry dearest responding to Draco coming out as gay with "That's nice" xd Which is why I used the word mature; I guess you can be that and still completely clueless xd).

Relationship angst aside, we get to focus on the plot and the mistery of the magic exchange between Harry and Draco. And what an alluring take on magical theory it takes! It reminded me of Beholden by @faith2wood (which I have recced as my day 12 fic) and I mean it as a huge complement <3

One more aspect of the writing I have to highlight is the delightful way the boys feel each other’s magic is described:

His magic is a cool breeze on Draco’s cheeks.

It has his heart rabbiting, a sudden swell of magic rising in his chest. It’s less a roar this time and more a crashing wave, rushing up his spine and across his shoulders, drawing blood to his cheeks. He tries to breathe with it and finds he can—an easy breath that feels soothing in his lungs.

Potter’s magic, filling the air again now that he’s close, feels horribly like crawling into his bed at home.

His presence is like standing with your eyes closed in the warm spring air and still knowing exactly where the sun is.

And then they refer to it as „their” magic and suddenly they can feel each other’s emotions and SHARE DREAMS and I am melted into the floor. Now imagine the sex scenes with all the magic between them. You’re welcome ^^

Quotes and spoilers under the cut as I was live-commenting this fic as I was reading, I have to do this more often!

Thank you once again for the prompt @hprecfest and see you in the next one! (I'm pretending I am not a week late with these ^^)

“Draco.” His name, gentle and cajoling, chills him. It was his mother who said it last, wasn’t it? I love you, Draco, half caught on a sob as they passed each other between trials “Something has happened to your magic.”

Was that really necessary 😭😭😭

Where the rest of the world still feels a touch too much, this is a too much he craves.

Draco bby 🤍

Potter’s anger flares into the room suddenly and Draco shivers at the heat it sends over his skin. Finally. “Why do you keep following me around?” “As it so happens, I’ll die if I don’t.” Potter’s jaw ticks. “You know that’s not what I mean.” “Then use the proper tense, Potter. I know you’re a bit dull, but—” He has Draco by his shirt collar in the next second, and Draco can’t help but grin. “There you are.”

*Soft Dom!Draco has entered the conversation*

“What are you looking for in the Forest?” “You cry in your sleep.”

Communication skills at your finest Harry, good job xd

Draco is on the cliff edge again. His bed is behind him, lonely, safe. Cold. And in front of him, staggering, terrifying: Potter.

Jump baby jump!!!

„No one to tuck you in and tell you how special you are?” Potter’s face falls, silence with it. Draco feels a sudden chord of pain in his magic. He swallows down the need to fix it.

Yes, please, fix it!!

They don’t breathe a word of it during the day, but the bags under Potter’s eyes are finally fading. Now, Draco simply lifts his duvet in offering when Potter comes out of the bathroom and he crawls in without a word, always a careful distance between them, always a studied silence until they both fall asleep.

Oh my, the “all is normal in daylight as long as we don’t talk about the in between ” 😅

„He doesn’t want to be whole if whole means not with Harry.”

😭

[theanimekid]

Betrayal/ The Veil of Shadow found the new ruler

Synopsis: Love is not eternal, betrayal; cuts deeper than a scar. Now you'll be harmed no longer. You'll be loved once more. Embrace destiny, walk the veil, and rule as a Dark Queen.

Warnings: Monster, angst, sci-fi, blood, betrayal, heartbreak, death,

Shadow owes its birth to light- John Gay

“Love isn’t soft like those poets say. Love has teeth which bite and the wounds never close.” ― Stephen King, The Body

A/n: This will be about two or three chapters long, so grab some coffee, a blanket, and a couple of tissues, make that a couple boxes of tissue

Chapter 1: The Beginning and End

You will never feel pain again. You'll never feel hurt or suffering. You… will never experience betrayal… for now it was the last time… the last straw.

The Strom fumed in spikes of crimson and light-blue lighting. The chaos of thunderstorms rumbled the sky, buildings of merged flesh and bone carved into each like a deathly art, screams were heard for miles, screeching of the bats not living nor dead. As their dark sparks waved into the night. You stood, outside of your castle, watching the depths below, your body shrouded in mystery and despair. Your veil flew with the wind, eyes cold-hearted, broken no more, vengeance craving for suffering. Skin darker than a shade of navy blue. The might of the doors opened slowly, and a black substance moved within. It was quick and swift. Faster than the human eyes can catch.

It soon emerged with its fingertips skimming fingertips. Its purple hood covered its top face. He spoke in a canny yet diabolical fashion. "My Empress... the time has come," It said, As it played with its fingertips rhythmically. You turned to look at your advisor, your eyes sharpened, lowly. " Already?" You asked in a heartache and pitied tone. " I'm afraid yes, a newcomer has been seen in the human world, young and frail as he is, yet more fearful than the rest." The hand movement swayed and urged as his words, Walked away from the highland view. past your blackened throne so lonely and purposeless. Your advisor walked with you down the very, elongated hallway. Your soldiers lined up and bowed to you. "They're the same as always, Urmas."

"They live to benefit you, my beloved empress, as they will always be." He replied in assurance. The two walked for what seemed like a while and reached the end of the hallway. You stopped. Urmas stopped with you. His expression spread with little concern for his queen. " Is there something the matter, my sovereign?" You still stood there staring blankly at the door. " I-I- feel like I've been here before."

Urmas Cleared his throat. " Can you recall, my sovereign?" You shook your head, " I don't know, but yet at the same time, it feels as though." You turned to your advisor, offering your hand to him. Urmas instantly clutched it and held it to his hand. You beamed maliciously, teeth in all, "let's go raise bloodstained nightmare on humanity and make a world for my own." He smiled back." As you wish, my sovereign." The doors opened to a giant glass sphere, spiraling out of different stirs and harmonies. The two of you walked hand in hand. As you got closer to your glass sphere, lightly grazing the outer layer. Urmas walked on the other side of the figure.

The sphere's outer layer moved fluidly, liquifying. Your hand sunk into the glass sphere. Your eyes dilated, turning into a purplish pink. Your vision became severed as you gaze upon the human world into the brightness of the city. Your eyes searched and looked unnoticed. Til you found a little boy with glasses wandering down a dark alley. Frightened and alone, tight where you wanted him. 

You planted his fear into his mind, it took only mere moments before he was nothing more than paste. And a small portal of flesh emerged from the brick wall, pulsating quietly like a heartbeat for an ear to listen. His body remained dismembered and fractured. His eyes plucked out of their sockets. Your eyes blurred again, returning to normalcy. With a sigh of satisfaction, you removed your hand from the sphere. Urmas clapped his hands in applause. " Another astounding work my sovereign," He feted. You walked away from the sphere and headed towards the door. You tumbled to the floor, holding both sides of your head, Your head began to hurt. Screaming in pain as your advisor tried to assist you. Your vision contradicted with light, a picnic on the hill, a man standing next to you with a loving gaze, his hand reaching out to you, calling to you…

You gasped as you raised your head. Your body trembling, your advisor slowly got you back on your feet. "My empress, are you all right?" He questioned. You sighed, bobbing your head left and right. " I-I'm fine... I just, need to rest my eyes." 

*Back on Earth*

One of his shadow soldiers, sat on top of a nearby building, looking down upon its people and others. The shadow sighed in questionable purpose. It's been the fifth time this past year. The visions He saw, his queen in danger, screaming and sobbing for help, it's like an unending loop. Constantly, she was reaching out to him, calling to him...

His master emerged from the wall, Beru and Igris followed soon after, and his black coast got longer and ragged. He stopped at the edge. Sung turned his gaze toward his summon. " Is there a reason why you're not doing your patrol?" The soldier got up and kneeled before his master. " Forgive me, my king... but it feels like something has been bothering me." He didn't even bother looking upon his master. Thinking he will not believe him." And what has been bothering you?" Sung asked. He collected himself and explained clearly and carefully, not to anger him, " Lately, since the past year, I have been seeing visions... visions that I wish I could ignore, but it just couldn't." Sung knelt to his soldier's eyes. " Look at me, and tell me what you saw." The shadow soldier took a deep breath and looked dead into his king's eyes. " I saw... a woman in white, she was surrounded by black waters, she was slowly drowning, but no end. I was going to save her, but she started to cry, sobbing, calling out your name, and others. She turned to look at me, her face was recognizable... my king... I believe... that our queen is alive and needs your help."

Sung's eyes slowly widened, and he can feel his heart wailing out of his chest. She can't be... he watched her... if she is then why...

Beru and Igris can feel the energy around him growing. With his body trembling, he gripped his soldier's shoulders. " Are you... you 100 certain that's..." He nodded in response. Sung can feel his whole world collapse around him. You were alive, alive and alone, scared. " Did you anything else from your visions? Or where she could be? Did she tell you where to find her?" He started asking a million questions. But his soldier only gave him one and a solution. " She said to locate the portal where no man or light can find. The opposite of all worlds... Find the seer. And that's all I can remember." 

The search for the seer begins.

Part 2 in the making👍