#i couldnt rly decide on just one

[kissingarthurclaus]

Am I crazy?? Am I insane? Fuck it fnaf s/i for today!! 😵‍💫😵‍💫

She's a party planner/host and absolutely loves her job and the kids she works with and always keeps up a cheery attitude...well, almost always. She also grew up next to the Afton house and was very close to the family.

[hinamie]

the sirens are turning red

[attyrocious]

from a twt bandwagon to draw ur faves in your country's traditional clothing

[alukaforyou]

well hewwo there thumbelina :3 i preordered the luka one from the same company yesterday cuz it was her bday and i love her 💗

how cute is this i cant wait for her to come in april :') i love sitting figures sm <3 i have this jotaro fig thats articulated and he sits really well too

hes been in his box since i moved tho cuz... space :( hope to display him again one day.. and i have not one but TWO of these and they are both in boxes that is criminal

i tried to get him to sit like hanging off a shelf but it was 2 hard with the red armor bits :( i kno its possible tho cuz i saw ppl on twitter do it, ppl were taking his clothes off and all 🤪 lmaooo ONE DAY im gonna. find a good space to put all these guys >_<....

[omegawolverine]

rewatching teds 400mg edible story now that i know what it feels like

[beepochi]

many thoughts head overflowing but Liam going to spend the holiday with his dad and his dad's partner (they drink milk tea together and vibe)

eheh yea this is p much canon. liam genuinely loves jian once theyre finally introduced n vice versa😌 (one thing james actually facilitated well)

think ive only ever written one drabble thing w jian n liam interacting (even tho also hv many thoughts) but dont reckon itll ever see the light of day? so just gonna stick it down below for fun >:) its uhh set after james n jian break up🕺

It’s pouring outside the bar and Jian just stands on the footpath, feeling too cold and too hot. He also feels like he’s about to cry and briefly considers calling someone. Desmond or Marcus. No, not Marcus. Nor Desmond, actually. He swallows and starts walking, the rain hitting his shoulders. He loves them both. But they can be stifling. Their worry; concern; care for him. So earnest and real. He finds it overwhelming and he’s not sure he could face it tonight.

He starts feeling properly cold after he’s walked about a block. He’s soaked now and regrets wearing just the one layer; a thin white shirt. He wipes a forearm across his face and hopes he doesn’t get sick. Sniffing, and still feeling on the verge of tears for no apparent reason, he looks around. He recognises these buildings, he knows where he is. James lives nearby.

Jian swallows and his eyes actually well up for a moment. He blinks rapidly and blames it on the rain. He crosses the street.

On any other night, he’d go home. On any other night, he’d text first. On any other night, he’d stop and think. But tonight is not any other night and he’s not sure what he’s doing.

He doesn’t even need to think about the route; his feet just naturally take him to the classy apartment building.

It’s only when he’s rung the doorbell that Jian starts feeling sick. What if he tells Jian to go away; what if he’s found himself someone new; what if said someone new answers the door?

The door opens. Jian blinks and looks down.

“Liam.” he says, surprised. Liam’s face goes from confused to delighted in a matter of seconds. “Jian!” Jian swallows and desperately tries to think of an excuse, of a reason he suddenly has to leave again, of some reason for Liam to pretend he never saw him, of- “Jian.” a lower, less delighted voice sounds. Jian shifts his gaze upwards again. James stands behind Liam, a vegetable knife in his right hand. He’s in a white dress shirt and navy slacks; the dress shirt is pushed up to his elbows with the first two buttons undone. He looks gorgeous. Jian doesn’t have any words for him. James’s face shifts to a frown as he runs his eyes over Jian. “You’re soaked.” Jian swallows and looks down. He’s made a wet patch on the flooring outside. “I-” “-come in.” James tells him, putting his left hand on Liam’s shoulder as they both step back. Jian’s stomach turns. Nonetheless, he bends down to pull off his shoes before stepping inside and letting the door close behind him. He places his shoes beside the various other pairs, then has nothing to do with his hands. Liam moves in for a hug and Jian doesn’t mean to sidestep. Liam pulls back and pouts. “You don’t like me anymore?” Jian swallows, eyes flicking up to James’s before he answers. “Course I still like you.” He says. “But ‘m all wet. Don’t want you gettin’ sick.” Liam nods slowly and James’s free hand falls to ruffle his hair. “Go lay the table bud.” he says gently. “For Jian too.” Jian opens his mouth to refuse when James cuts him off with a look. Liam gives his dad a corny little salute before running to the kitchen. Jian clicks his thumb joint and feels his stomach twist. “‘M sorry, I-” “-it’s fine. You need to change, c’mon.” James turns and starts after his son. Jian watches him for a second, feeling god-awful, before he bites his cheek, peels off his wet socks and follows.

After a brief stop in the kitchen to deposit the knife, James leads them to the bedroom. Jian hovers awkwardly by the bed as James goes through his wardrobe. Jian is fascinated by how somewhere that used to be his home now feels so foreign. He bites his lip. “James, I didn’t- ‘f I’d known Liam was here I wouldn’t’ve-” “-it’s okay.” James cuts him off calmly, turning away from the wardrobe with a pair of grey sweats and a black shirt. Jian feels his eyes go hot and prickly and he scowls. “It’s not— ‘m sorry. I didn’t mean— t’ come. I-” “-Jian.” James hands him the clothes and catches Jian’s eye. “It’s okay. I mean it. Let me get you a towel.” Jian numbly accepts the clothes as James moves to the ensuite. He drops his gaze to them and they feel so soft. He puts them on the bed.

James returns and comes far too close in order to drop the towel over Jian’s head. He then starts to dry Jian’s hair. His jaw is set, Jian notices, yet not quite in anger. “You look nice.” James tells him after a heavy silence. His eyes are on his hands as he continues to move the towel against Jian’s hair. Jian’s throat clicks as he swallows. “Night out?” James pushes and Jian feels nauseous. “I—” he starts and wishes he could read James’s face, his tone, anything. “-went to a bar.” James’s hands finish and he nods, stepping back. “With friends?” Jian doesn’t know why he’s asking this of all things. He pulls the towel off his head and drops it on the bed. “No.” He mutters, stripping off his shirt and retrieving the towel to rub roughly over his arms and torso. “By yourself.” James says and he folds his arms over his chest. Jian focuses on pulling on the black shirt. It’s too big for him, obviously, and smells of James. “Are you okay?” James asks after Jian stays silent. Jian moves his hands to the waistband of his trousers. He’s not sure how to answer and undoes his fly button and then his fly. James lets out a very light sigh. “Are your boxers wet too?” He asks. “Do you want to borrow some?” “S’fine.” Jian peels off his trousers. James hums as he nods. Jian wishes he would look away as he moves his hands to the waistband of his pants. “Which bar?” James asks. Jian sets his jaw. The shirt is big enough that it covers everything so he pushes his boxers down quickly and doesn’t bother drying before he tugs on James’s sweats. “The Bridge.” Jian mutters and he watches James’s eyebrow twitch. “Why that one?” Jian bites the inside of his cheek and breaks eye contact. He pulls the drawstring of the sweats tight. “Thought it was what I wanted.” James is quiet. Jian has trouble making a knot. “But?” James prods. Jian scowls as his fingers fumble and he has to start again. “But nothin’. Some creep tried t’—” He fucks up a simple knot once again and cusses. James steps closer and knocks his hands away. “Tried to what?” He asks, making quick work of tying the drawstring but not moving back when he’s done. Jian refuses to lift his eyes from the waistband of the sweatpants. James’s hands come to rest at his waist. So light, Jian can’t even feel them. “Nothin’.” He says. “He was just horny. I wasn’t bein’ clear.” The hands get a little tighter. And then, finally, the question Jian had been waiting for: “And you came here. Why?” Jian can feel the warmth of James’s body, he can smell his shampoo, his cologne. He looks at James’s socked feet and his chest aches. Wetness returns to his eyes and he glowers. “Why d’you think?” There’s a small breath from James. “I can’t read your mind, Jian. You need to tell me.” Jian takes his bottom lip into his mouth and realises James’s socks are mismatched. One is navy, the other is black. He sniffs wetly and he didn’t mean it to be such a loud noise. “Needed t’ see you.” He manages. James is quiet. Jian regrets his phrasing. And then there are soft lips pressing against his forehead. “Okay.” James murmurs, pulling back. His hands travel up to cup Jian’s face and he makes it unavoidable to meet his eyes. Jian’s vision is blurry and he blinks. A tear slips out and he clenches his jaw. James’s thumb brushes it away. “I really didn’t-” His voice is tight and he doesn’t know what he’s even saying. “-‘m sorry.” James just watches him, eyes critical. Jian bites his lip as his eyes overflow again. “I know ‘m not- it- but I couldn’t—” James cuts him off with a kiss.

Jian, of course, hadn’t expected a kiss. And if he did, he might expect a soft, tender one. This one, however, is firm and hot and demanding. James’s hands tighten where they cup Jian’s face, giving him nowhere to go. There is tongue and teeth and Jian’s mind is hazy as he just lets James take.

When James finally pulls back, it’s only enough to let them both breathe. “Stay the night.” He says, nose brushing Jian’s. Jian should say no. “Okay.” James presses another kiss against his lips. “Liam’ll be happy.” He says, stepping back. “Put your clothes in the laundry, I’ll wash them tomorrow.” Jian nods and picks up his soaked clothes.

James goes back to the kitchen and Jian watches him continue chopping vegetables. He feels awkward and is about to offer to help when there’s a light tug on his shirt. “Jian, I did your ones the right way round, look.” Liam pulls him along to the sleek dining table and shows Jian where he’s set Jian’s plate. Jian nods, confused, but gives Liam a small smile anyway. “Fork on left, knife on right.” he explains proudly. Jian blinks and looks back to the table. He notices his place is the only one set this way and can’t help laughing, ever so quietly. “You got it wrong man.” He says softly and switches the knife and fork around. “Knife ’n the left.” Liam groans. “I knew it.” He grumbles and moves to fix his and James’s. When he’s done he looks back to Jian. “Does this mean you’re coming back?” He asks, eyes bright and hopeful. Jian’s stomach drops. He doesn’t know how to respond. “Dad said you didn’t love him anymore.” Liam obliviously continues and Jian thinks he might vomit. His eyes flick over to where James tenses in the kitchen. “But that’s not true.” Liam tells him. Jian really doesn’t want to start crying again, definitely not in front of a child. He clears his throat, trying to get rid of the lump there. “Yeah. S’not true.” He agrees quietly. Liam smiles and Jian notices a missing tooth, one of his top canines. It’s very cute. He points halfheartedly, “When’d that happen?” Liam’s face - impossibly - brightens. “Two days ago!” He says, sticking fingers into his mouth as if to better show Jian. Jian snorts and gently tugs the hand down. “Very cool.” “This one’s loose too!” Liam pushes his tongue against one of his bottom canines and Jian nearly cringes as he watches it wiggle. “Careful.” he mutters, not feeling particularly keen on watching it be pushed from Liam’s gum. Liam rolls his eyes. “Doesn’t hurt.” Jian snorts again. “So brave.” Liam laughs and then he’s taking Jian’s hand and pulling him to his bedroom.

He sits Jian on the bed before telling him to stay and carefully moving a big Lego structure to the middle of his floor. “It’s a spaceship.” he starts, adjusting the toy dinosaur seemingly just plonked on top. “And a hair dresser’s.” Jian laughs and slips off the bed in order to have a better look.

Liam happily guides him through, pointing out all the little secrets and quirks. Jian thinks it’s actually quite impressive and tells him so. Liam accepts the praise as if he already knows and Jian’s chest pangs with affection, listening to Liam start on the dinosaur’s backstory.

They’re up to the bit where the dinosaur is wanted in seven states when James’s voice cuts through. “Dinner’s ready boys.” Jian looks up. James is leant on the doorframe, expression unplaceable. “Yus!!” Liam shoots up and races out of his room. “Wash your hands!” James calls idly after him. There’s an ambiguous yell in reply. Jian stands and steps carefully around Liam’s spaceship. “Did you make?” He asks. James pushes off the doorframe. “Pasta.”

Liam’s plate is already full when he and James join him. Piled high with pasta and one leaf of salad. Jian snorts to himself as he sits beside Liam. “Leave some salad f’r us, huh?” Liam ignores him, shovelling a forkful of pasta into his tiny mouth. “‘Lwedy ate slad jus’-” He swallows. “you guys didn’t see me eat it.” Jian laughs. James doesn’t. “Liam, manners please.” Liam pouts, but sits up straighter nonetheless. James looks to Jian. “Help yourself.” Jian nods and puts only a little bit on his plate. He doesn’t feel hungry. James watches with a moderate expression but doesn’t comment, helping himself once Jian is done.

It’s quiet for the first minute. A weird tenseness hangs in the air. Jian swallows his mouthful, stabbing a piece of cucumber with his fork. “What’re you doin’ at school Liam?” He asks because the silence is making him more and more anxious. Liam, much to his father’s approval, chews and swallows before answering. “Doing a project on the Nile.” “Yeah?” Jian pushes because if he can just get Liam to start… “Yeah!” Liam grins and Jian feels a flood of relief. “And it’s also- I’m working with Amelia who’s my best friend! And we have to- it’s really cool!” He pauses to have another mouthful before excitedly continuing. “We’re making a cardboard copy of the Nile. To scale! And-” Jian lets out a helpless laugh and even James, who seems so restrained and distracted, snorts quietly. “-y’mean not t’ scale, yeah?” Jian gently interjects. Liam’s cheeks tinge red and he lets out a bashful laugh. “Right, right. It’d be massive otherwise! Oh, right! It’s the Nile from ancient Egypt. Forgot that bit. That’s the main bit.” Jian smiles and nods, picking through his food. “So we’re making a cardboard copy, not to scale, and then we’re also making some games from ancient Egypt and it’s so much fun!” he quickly munches down another forkful. “Jian, did you know the ancient Egyptians invented toothpaste?” Jian did not. “No.” He says. “That’s awesome.” Liam nods. “Yeah! And locks too!”

Thus, over the course of the meal, Jian learns all kinds of trivia about ancient Egypt. Interesting facts he will no doubt forget by tomorrow. After everyone’s finished, James tells Liam to load the dishwasher and he goes to the bathroom. Jian feels useless as Liam does his chores, so helps out by wiping the dining table and kitchen down. Liam tells him he doesn’t need to and soon enough shoos Jian out of the kitchen to ‘relax.’

Jian sits on the sofa and does not relax. He spots the blue highlighter stain he’d accidentally marked on the couch last year and idly rubs at it. He’s surprised James hasn’t cleaned it off properly. He then looks at the blank TV before standing and moving to the window. He shifts the curtain and peeks out at the cityscape. It’s pretty.

He goes onto the balcony and leans on the railing. It’s cold but he likes it. Gives him something to feel other than sad. He doesn’t even know if it’s sadness. Maybe it’s more like disconnect. Uncertainty and confusion, too.

He hears the door slide open then shut behind him and his chest twinges for no reason. A hand slips around his waist as James comes to stand next to him. “What’s going on?” he asks, soft. Jian goes straight back to on the verge of tears. He swallows and starts scratching at the railing. “Nothin’.” James makes a noise of disagreement. “You want anything? Beer?” “Tea.” Jian says. James lets out a breath of laughter. “I only have earl grey, that alright?” Jian wrinkles his nose and straightens up. “Hot chocolate.” James’s hand rubs up and down his back. “Okay.” The hand drops as he turns to go back inside. “Don't stay out here, it’s too cold.” So Jian follows him in.

He drops next to Liam on the sofa and squints at the TV. He’s watching Brooklyn Nine-Nine. Jian keeps his distaste to himself and instead drops a hand over Liam’s shoulder and shuffles so they’re both comfy.

James makes them each a hot chocolate and has a glass of wine for himself. He sits beside Jian on the couch but doesn’t touch him and Jian isn’t sure if he’s happy or sad for the fact.

They watch one more episode before James tells Liam to go to bed. Reluctantly, Liam does so. But before he goes, he makes Jian promise to be here tomorrow. Jian’s stomach knots as he does.

The atmosphere immediately changes when James comes back from tucking Liam in and Jian tries to ignore it. He bites his thumb nail as James drops beside him, watching him go back to the Netflix homepage. “Anything you wanna watch?” he asks, absently scrolling through the many options. Jian drops his hand from his mouth. “No.” James pauses on some crime show before scrolling on. “Movie or TV?” “TV.” Jian mutters, not sure what to do now he’s not chewing his nails. James moves to the TV shows page. Jian sees he’s been watching Queer Eye (though he’d not apparently managed to finish his episode) and Abstract. He can’t think of anything further from what he feels like than Queer Eye. The trailer for some psychological crime drama starts playing. A woman stabs a man on a beach. “Light or heavy?” James asks, frowning at the trailer. “I don’t—” Jian starts before worrying indecisiveness will annoy James. “-let’s just watch…” He hurriedly scans the screen for something. “Tintin.” James glances at him. His lips twitch as he looks away. “Okay.”

Jian does actually like Tintin, but he doesn’t think James is enjoying it. That starts making him antsy. He keeps glancing from the screen to James’s deadpan face. He chews his lip and wonders if it would annoy James more to continue watching a kid’s show or to start the search for something to watch all over again. “Relax.” James finally says and there is an edge of annoyance in his tone. Jian’s gut sinks and he bites the inside of his cheek, glancing over. James side-eyes him. “You’re being very loud.” He says. Jian scowls. “Didn’t say ‘nythin’.” James sighs and runs a hand over his face. “You didn’t need to.” He looks at Jian for a while, then fixes his eyes back on the screen. Jian had assumed there was more to come but apparently there’s not. He swallows audibly and shifts, tucking his legs underneath himself and leaning subtly away from James.

A few minutes pass in which Jian quietly watches the TV. But he’s just getting more and more edgy. Finally, he puts his feet down on the plush carpet. “I should go.” He mutters as Tintin and Snowy board a boat. James looks over at him. His eyebrows are raised, not in surprise, not in worry, but in something almost like flat disapproval. “What about Liam?” He asks, returning his gaze to the TV. Jian hates the disinterested air he’s putting on and clicks his thumb joint again. “Shouldn’t’ve even come.” James doesn’t reply to that and Jian feels a rush of frustration. “What about you?” he asks and he sounds immature. A muscle in James’s jaw jumps. “What about me?” He keeps his eyes trained on the TV. Jian swallows. “Don’t you want me t’ leave?” James lets out a dry breath of laughter and looks back at him. “Clearly, baby. That’s why I asked you to stay.” Jian hates when James is sarcastic. It always makes him feel stupid and small. “Doesn’t seem like you want me here.” Jian tells him and he hopes to god he doesn’t start fucking crying again. James sets his jaw before he answers. “I don’t know why you’re here.” He says and his tone now has a slightly softer edge. “I’m trying to give you space.” The lump in Jian’s throat aches. “I don’t want space.” He says, very quietly. James watches him. “What do you want?” God fucking knows. Jian wants to go home, he wants to stay. He wants to talk things through, he never wants to speak again. He wants James to touch him.

Slowly, so James can tell him to fuck off if he wants to, Jian moves. He moves to sit on James’s lap, thighs either side of him. James’s hands naturally come to rest on his hips and Jian isn’t sure where to put his. He settles for James’s shoulders. James continues to watch him. “This is what you want?” He asks. Jian isn’t entirely sure. He nods. James is still for a moment more before one hand comes up behind Jian’s neck and tugs him down.

[arolesbianism]

I'm starting to see ppl talk abt updating their artfight pages and at first I was like what why it's still months away and then it hit me that by months it was two months and now I'm just silently sweating as my anual side project to remake the eternal gales refs and give them all icons comes back to haunt me

[biblicalhorror]

You ever had a friendship where like you kind of faded out of each other's lives for a period of time and then re-bonded without ever really addressing the distance so now every time one of you mentions something you never told the other one during The Dark Time you both just have to be like "yeah, this massive thing that happened to me that we didn't talk about at the time but I totally wanted to tell you about but it felt like I couldn't talk to you but I'm also not gonna say it was your fault because I don't want to drive you away again but I know and you know exactly what it is we're not talking about"

[bfwonho]

You own a car??

yeah. see im in a really interesting situation where my parents are upper-middle class but refuse to spend money on their kids as much as possible. no tuition, nothing, once youre out of the house youre on your own. thats why i was eventually kicked out, i had no job or plans to go to school and so i overstayed my welcome and had to scramble to get a job and ive been living paycheck to paycheck ever since

however, when me and my siblings turned 18 we all did get a cheap piece of shit car, i cant afford to fix the loud ass squeak in mine or take it to the car wash but its a huge privilege i even have one to begin with i fully understand that. i live in a little quaint town with shit public transport so id be fucked if i didnt have one tbh i wouldnt be able to work (before i had my license NO ONE would hire me either even when i told them how id get there alternatively. you need a license and car to even survive here which is just great isnt it)

[rucow]

having dwemer ocs is so funny

[caruliaa]

no offence but why are all the solutions to issues caused by trauma therapy. what if i Cant do that right but still want to not be like this.

[phagodyke]

I feel like my meds keep wearing off earlier and earlier in the day ugh.. having to lie down now im home from work I'm shattered :-(

[nomaishuttle]

literally the pet rooms at work are the evillest not bc the pets are bsd at ALL theyve all been either well behaved or very timid and avoidant so its not like they get in the way. theyre bad bc my heart wants to just pet the kittys forever

[choccy-milky]

A few months back, I asked if it was okay to write using Clora and Seb. Finished the work - thought I'd lost it on my hard drive and a virus scan located it.

Not sure if it's sad or happy, but the basic premise of it is Clora getting frustrated/upset at Sebastian and Sebastian comforting her, Sebastian getting upset at a predicament Clora's in and Clora comforting him, and them both getting frustrated/upset and having to comfort each other.

If you'd rather I didn't post it, that's fine too, but just wanted to test the waters and double check that you'd be okay with it if I gifted it to you via AO3, or see if you wanted a sneak peak of it before posting it.

OMG im so happy you were able to find it and recover the work you did!!😭🙏 AND YES OF COURSE YOU CAN POST IT AAA I CANT WAIT TO READ IT!! you can DM it to me first if you want, but i also dont mind if you post it straight away on ao3!! IM LOOKING FORWARD TO IT SM AAARGHHHA💖💖💖IT SOUNDS ANGSTY WE LOVE THE HURT/COMFORT I HOPE MY HEART CAN HANDLE IT🥺💖💖TY AGAIN FOR USING CLORA AND SEB AND TAKING THE TIME TO WRITE SOMETHING ABOUT THEM😭

@sunshine-goblin AAA THANK YOU!!! im honoured its your fav fanfic AND ALSO THE LONGEST YOUVE READ BAHAHAA fr, when you say its as long as four books in lotr it rly makes me realize how insane i am😃👍 aw IM GLAD I COULD INSPIRE YOU TO DRAW MORE AND WRITE AS WELL😭 I was curious so i creeped you and everyone go look at their HL blog @sunshines-legacy your MC is so cute and so is your art🥹💖 as for tips on writing a longfic and brainstorming and motivation and stuff, my motivation was my brainrot and unhappiness with the canon story/ending LMAOO, and looking at the story of the game and playing around with what i was unhappy with/what i WISHED could have happened instead, was a lot easier than just coming up with plotlines from scratch. but something i highly recommend is just OUTLINING and making a timeline, one of my fav parts of writing was just putting on some cafe ambience in the background and doing stream of conscious type word documents where id just barf ideas and then worry about making it pretty later....like look at how many versions of the same chapter i have BAHAHA or like different renditions bc i couldnt decide if id wanna keep a scene/what order, so id make a timeline and keep smoothing things out until i was happy with it and whatnot

brainstorming is defs my fav part of the process and the most helpful part to me. just getting a blank document and writing stuff you want to happen without worrying about how it connects to the story, and then a lot of the times as i was doing that id just keep going and it would kinda tie itself together/id come up with a solution as i was writing / once the ideas kept flowing. so basically : TIMELINES AND OUTLINES I VERY MUCH RECOMMEND, but very low pressure and barebones ones. for example, this is what my outlines/brainstorming look like

its honestly just me talking to myself LMAO, and a lot of the time ill interject and be like "OH YEAH AND THEN THIS CAN HAPPEN" as the ideas come while im writing BAHAHA. its a super fun process and honestly nothing feels better than just getting hit with that flash of inspo, and since its all very low effort theres no pressure to actually write well and its just a chill fun time AND GOOD LUCK WITH YOUR OWN PROCESS / WRITING💖💖💖it can be difficult but HOPE U HAVE FUN TOO💖💖

@a-little-lysdexic WAIT REALLY?? LMFAOO OMG THATS CRAZY....SAME BRAIN...🤝🤝...that would trip me up so much if i were you omg BAHHAHA but aside from having similar tastes in names, IM GLAD YOU LIKE MY ART AS WELL, TYY💖💖💖

THANK YOUUU im glad you're liking it!!! and that its taking over your life BAHAHA💖💖 the video you're thinking of was by @silverxstardust for chapter 13 of my fic, and you can watch the video here! (AND TY AGAIN TO SILVERXSTARDUST FOR DOING THIS!)

[happy-ambivert]

Actorgenic - is a system… a. …which one of origins can form due to creating new prsonality, "being" and non-existing person, impersonating, faking identityy+more b. …who faked having "different personalities" "different identtities", not really same as faking being a system! This can be caused by havingn o knowledge what is a system termin are c. …failed tulpamancy which turned into traumagenic system due to specific reasons d. …system who likes wrong terms like "personalities", "alter-ego" instead of alter, headmates. Probably its host which arent respecting their headmates e. etc simmiliar to this above

Actorgenic systems does not have amnesia(only emotional) or have but specific types of it and simmiliar to median system, fakegenic system or impostergenic system by description and meaning, not same experience and origins Oftenly these systems can have currently fronting headmate confused who are they, thinking they are host or main fronter and etc Or host, who is mimic, actor, chameleon or etc role and likes to pretending being other alter and others situaitons which can leadto situation where fornetr is confused who are they and they believes they are THIS alter Or others situations, thats can confuse the system Hosts of these systems dont mind their alters being called one of their personalities athought their headmates would mind, sometimes they are really believes that they are one of their headmates or confused who are fronting right now actorgenic can be traumagenic or endogenic system or both and can also be shortly described plural singlet, not same as median system! They have really chaotic relationships between host/main fronter and headmates and more problems

termin coined by me, flag by me i cant find anything that can describe one of my system origins or multiple possible origins for us, this is probably my personal experience btw some definitions are simmiliar to describe us but can not fully describe us, i just made it easier to portray and just add simmiliar definitions and its still can confuse some can fall under many definitions

colors and term name meaning the first concept is og and it whats first became in my head but then after designing i realised it almost looks like existing flag of gender identity the second i tried to remake, prbly nothing rly changed but i cant really judge this colros is what i associate actors with idk i also have red stripes version the symbol is a moon phases ik its bad prbly at first i wanetd to do mask, but i couldnt find idea for "face" and it would show wrong the symbol, then decided to do without "face" and it looked like shield. i also wanetd to make as "time" and then i made moon+mask version, still not what i wnated symbolize And it wast eh reason why moon phases, the moon symbolise "same, but different" and moon phases are really connected with most of cultures, the new moon and half moon, for example, are same for earth, but not for people beliefs, "same for myself, different for others" its dont really related to real actors and theatre, also dont related to actors(as role for some systems alters)

while writing this i got many problems with having any style and decided to dont tell our whole experience at all :f

btw it happened long time ago and im SURE its one of my reason why my system is formed im traumagenic nondisrodered system also , i have traumas which i dont rememebr(parenst told me)+some traumas i remember

[thirdtidemouse]

i have to do more bc she isnt rly brought to life yet.. she will change a LOT... but this is dylan :-] (hammarlund? underhill?) i couldn't not do a hilda oc and i couldnt not make it a nervous werewolf. she stresses herself out but is surprisingly organised about cooking, one of the famously stressful activities. she spends a full day planning out a meal, cooking for herself and kaisa (thank god. that nerd cannot cook) and then asks for detailed reviews.

she is very stressed out about being a werewolf though. she has just finished being a teenager and this is kind of that all over again. she does not want ANYONE to find out and confides reluctantly only in kaisa. what she fears is people fearing her, and she feels like the moment her life has been pieced back together again, she's losing grip, again. it's almost a black hound situation when the people of trolberg hear about a werewolf sneaking around. some episode centred around the mystery ensues.

she likes food + music! although she's more of an amateur at music, she owns + plays a guitar, a mandolin, a banjo, and a harmonica. very folksy. she has a swedish-welsh accent. try and imagine it please.

the default sister dynamic is kaisa getting home from work late (she probably lives in a flat in/around the library), and dylan being in the midst of homemade ravioli or something with a sauce that took 6 hours. kaisa asks about her day to be polite. dylan tells her about the sauce that took 6 hours, a long hike, 3 different invasive plant species, a lot of butter, and the use of powertools. kaisa has been re-shelving niche history of magic books but got so caught up re-reading them that it also took up 6 hours. when they have eaten dylan asks for her opinion and scribes the whole thing down in her notebook as kaisa voices her 5 star yelp review. they do not ask anything else about each others days and interact mainly through dylan slow-motion fake-punching kaisa while she is trying to just hang out in the living room or do her work and is ignored. only when she is in a very good mood will kaisa fake-punch back. dylan has a lethal case of younger-sister-that-is-taller syndrome.

sorry for my handwriting but the vague outline of her backstory WHICH MAY PROBABLY CHANGE is:

from the time she was 8 and kaisa was 21, they lived alone together. kaisa became a full-fledged witch between then and age 25, when suspicion against witches was on the rise for a short while - dylan never became a witch, but the only trusted adults in her life (basically kaisa and tildy) were, and they decided it would be best for her to grow up somewhere less troublesome. they were both pretty messed up about her having to move away, dylan holding some kind of spite toward her sister for a while, and kaisa feeling incapable, guilty and ill-equipped to take care of her.

she went to school in wales at 12, living with as-yet-unspecified family members/friends, and while kaisa almost immediately regretted sending her away, dylan adjusted quickly and spent the rest of her school career there. after a few years she forgave kaisa, because she ultimately enjoys her life, but she is stilll missed at home. at 17 going on 18 she became a werewolf (whether she was bitten or it was always in her somewhere?) and four months later she finished sixth form and called kaisa out of the blue asking if she could come and move in. since they didn't live in trolberg before, she's new to the city.

i will write more cohesively about her relationships to other characters/flesh her out more later, ESPECIALLY the werewolf stuff, but now i have to go to bed. thank you for reading :-] feel free to ask/suggest anything about her!! i love discussing hilda ocs

by the way this is i think my first ever actual OC? i've made up others before but they've just been single designs i've never really thought much about their actual selves because i suck at writing. dylan is the first one thats really stuck. part of her is based off myself and people i know, most of her is not. the main similarity between us is double-denim.

this is fun though. critique is welcome

(obviously her werewolf self is a swedish elkhound. i know the design kind of just looks like a furry im working on it)