#i care him so deeply

[one-bunny-a-day]

03/01/2023

BunQiao-daozun ♡

[seyraccoon]

honestly at this point I think only a hug from jimbei could fix me

[doomednarrative]

AUGH...KIRIYA'S NAME GETTING READ WITH THE DECEASED....

[pacipinka]

*taps mic* is this thing on? Yeah okay so every vampire in the vampire chronicles is turned at critical a moment in their lives and beyond just the body they are in when they are turned, their mentality stays at that standstill for their entire immortality, Lestat was turned against his will, he was clinging onto Magnus begging him to be freed, so he’s constantly seeking freedom and only finding loneliness and thus turning back to people again and again, however he can’t STAND being told what to do, since he desires agency in his life so desperately, Armand was turned after years and years of abuse and lack of control but such a desire for genuine love, by a man he ‘loved’ so wholly who he felt was barring his love from him, he needs control in his life, he needs a ‘master’ but he does not desire it, it does not fulfill him, he is trapped in a room but the door is unlocked! Louis was mourning his brother, he felt like an utter failure and so he’s always seeking family, seeking people he can care for, he can coddle, he can prove he is good too, but he loves people who either cannot stand coddeling and need a sense of looseness to live (Lestat) or people who grow out of coddling who prove to Louis he will always fail the people he loves (Claudia), Claudias turning, in many MANY ways mirrors lestats in that it was against her will, she was stolen from her home, and in her immortality she desires freedom but unlike Lestat does not have the agency/ form to get it, she will always be small, she will always be looked down on, even by Lestat who cannot deny how much she is just like him *taps mic* ARE YOU LISTENING TO ME!! NONE OF THEM CAN BREAK THE CYCLE!!! TO BREAK IT WOULD BE TO UNDO THE VERY FIBER OF THEIR IMMORTAL SELVES!! THE CYCLE IS THE BLOOD THEY DRINK IT IS THE HEART IN THEIR CHEST AND IT ROLLS AND ROLLS DOWN THE MOUNTAINS AND VALLEYS OF THEIR LOVE FOR EACH OTHER AND IT CAN NEVER BE STOPPED BECAUSE THEY WILL NEVER STOP LOVING EACH OTHER!!!!!!!!!!!!

[keferon]

The tac net crash chapter is one of my favorites so far~

Ah and. Guess what. I just discovered that including this post, I made 50 pieces of fanart for Mistakes on mistakes until.. I’m so sane and normal about this story can you tell👍

[sharkylad]

Thinking about the fact that Mabel and Dipper didn't know they had two great uncles.

Yeah they are 12 and at 12 I had a shotty understanding of my family tree- But really? Nobody brought up their great uncle? Stanley? Especially since they'll be staying with his twin brother, Stanford?

Shermie never went to Stan's fake funeral, which to me means the twos relationship was strained on some level. If Shermie is older that means his view of Stan was poisoned in some way, that even as kids they weren't close. If the Shermie is younger then he never even got to meet Stan and all he knew about him was how he failed his family. Hell, people probably barely mentioned Stanley TO Shermie.

The fact that Stan had become a black stain upon the Pines family name makes me so vividly upset. Stanley faked his death and the family just- seemingly decided to strike him from the record. To pretend he didn't existed to spare themselves the sadness and shame.

Stanford and Shermie Pines. The only children worth mentioning of Filbrick and Caryn Pines.

It was never Stanford that was lost to the world. It was Stanley, ever since he had to leave New Jersy- it was always him that had to be struck from the record. Change his name, change his state, change his affiliations, destroy the remains of ghost that was Stanley Pines. Kill him so the family doesn't bring him up, doesn't ask questions, stops asking "Stanford" about his twin.

I just keep thinking about the fact that since the day he made one single mistake all the way up until Ford walks out of that machine- Stanley Pines was killed and did not exist. And Stan himself had no one to blame, he had to play the part in his own demise- He is the only one who ever knew Stanley was alive and has been for decades.

He lives in the multitudes of every personality he's ever taken, all in the hope that he himself can stop being Stanley Pines.

[christakisbang]

[atomicowboy]

okay FINE i’ll draw them

[ruporas]

special operatives (silly interaction beneath read more)

[ID: Digital Art in color of Trigun Maximum, characters included are Wolfwood, Elendira, and Legato in a casual meeting situation. The piece consists of orangey yellow lighting and purple shadows. Wolfwood sits on the left side, facing Elendira who’s on the right. He’s seated on a plain wooden chair with one knee up and he’s holding the strap to his Punisher in his left hand while his right sits against his thigh, He has an irritated expression as he speaks to Elendira. Elendira is sitting in a fancier seat, her right arm rests against Wolfwood’s propped up knee, her left hand holds her suitcase. She’s sitting cross legged with an amused expression. Legato can be seen in the back at the center of the image in his mobile body case, one of his eyes shown to be glaring at Wolfwood. End ID]

[ID: Sketch, uncolored comic. Elendira says to Wolfwood, “I’m not telling you to dedicate yourself to him, but just accept the situation at hand. We could get along better if we were on the same page.” Wolfwood responds, “Don’t peg me me for an optimist. I’m not dumb. But, I’m also not going to just live in resignation. Plus, I don’t have any interest in getting along with ya.” Elendira coos, “Aw, you sure? I have a wonderful shoulder to cry on when the weak people you’re trying to protect eventually dies in the coming months. Though, I guess it’s fine. Someone like you might just die before then anyway...” She snickers in her hand while Wolfwood is speechless and just glares. Legato is faintly drawn in the back, glaring at Wolfwood, muttering “worthless” repetitively. End ID]

[rendevok]

The sensation of waking up next to you ❤️💙

+bonus doodle:

…and they mimir’d happily ever after the end. ❤️

(ID under cut!)

Miles is roused from sleep by sunlight shining on his face. Slowly, his eyes adjust to the light, until finally, his scope of awareness broadens to a body he had been sleeping on.

Page 2

Miles looks up to the figure that holds him, and upon seeing, his eyes widen in recognition.

Miles looks up to the figure that holds him, and upon seeing, his eyes widen in recognition.

The bottom panel of the page shows minimal details of a window shedding light onto the bed and blankets as seen from a higher view in the room.

Page 3

On the other side of the bed, Phoenix rests, his head propped by the headboard. His hair is messy from sleep, and his expression is thoughtful. The light of the morning highlights his features.

The sun shines through the blinds of the window.

Phoenix finally notices his observer, and turns to look at him.

Page 4

Phoenix takes Miles’ hand in his, and lifts it to gently kiss the ring on Miles’ finger. They both move to share a kiss, and their hands shift to hold one another. Miles’ ring sparkles in the sunlight.

Page 5

They link their fingers as they kiss, and the morning creates a quiet atmosphere around them.

They part, but remain close, their fingers fully interlocked. Phoenix greets “Good morning,” with a tender, loving expression as he looks at Miles. Miles’ own expression is soft, unguarded, and fixed on Phoenix.

Page 6

Phoenix and Miles settle back into their shared bed; the morning sun illuminates them. They both smile softly, seeming happy and at peace. Miles rests his head under Phoenix’s neck, and his hand on Phoenix’s chest. One of Phoenix’s hands rests over Miles’ own on his chest, while his other hand holds Miles closer, revealing a matching ring of his own. Both rings shine softly in the sunlight.

Bonus image

A small simple drawing of Phoenix and Miles having fallen asleep again while holding each other as in the final page of the comic.

End ID.]

[sysig]

Gift (Patreon)

[kanjichris]

"why don't you want him to know how much you love him?" "that's a little personal. he knows." "uh-huh."

[hecksupremechips]

Mizuki and Date though like. Imagine being 8 and your parents are filthy rich and going through a bad divorce. Your mom treats you like shit, lashing out at you, hitting you, saying she wishes you were never born all because you were behaving like a child. Your dad is more comforting, but he doesn’t do anything to stop the abuse and he spends his time invested in a completely different family, a girl who you love and look up to but he loves her more than you and it fucking shows. Then your dads new friend, some fucking bachelor in his late 20s, is just like "wow you guys are the worst fucking parents ive ever seen" and next thing you know your dad is sending you off to live with him. And it’s just a massive kick in the head cuz you go from a rich lifestyle to living in some really shitty tiny ass apartment with this guy who’s clearly never been around a child in his entire life and he doesn’t know how to behave and does a really bad job of censoring himself like he has a bunch of dirty magazines that he can’t hide very well cuz it’s literally a studio apartment and also he talks to himself sometimes, it’s really weird. He doesn’t even have the slightest clue what he’s doing

And he’s the best parent you’ve ever had

Because fuck, it all really hurts. You have to cope with having never received any love from anyone, and with the fact that your parents clearly don’t want you and can’t even be bothered to send you with anyone even kinda responsible. And this guy has a scary job with crazy hours and you don’t know anything about him and neither does he. But still, he never once hits you or tells you you’re not allowed to cry. He just gives you space and doesn’t push you to feel any sort of way about him. And sometimes, he’s even kind. He makes you some stew, even though it’s a bit chunky. He lets you sleep in the bed and takes the couch for himself, even though he complains about the massive back pain he’d never trade his spot for a second. He pays attention to events at your school and gives you your favorite stuffed animal when you make good grades, even though you called it ugly. He gets worried sick when you come home with bruises and puts on a goofy voice and trains you to defend yourself and you develop some highly deadly skills and even though it’s really abnormal, he buys you a bench press so you can get stronger. There’s this distance there, and you feel really weird caring about someone who you aren’t related to, but you find yourself wishing it was meant to be like this all along, that maybe, he’s secretly your real dad and he loves you like his real daughter

And when you say "I’m back" he says "welcome home"

[alluratron]

Thoughts on Gojo Satoru

Gojo Satoru is a character with nuance.

With the release of JJK chapter 236, many people are shocked, confused and outraged at his characterisation at the end of his run in the manga. There are claims of character assassination, of blatant disregard for everything he has done so far, of telling instead of showing. The portrayal of Gojo as someone whose primary motivation was strength has left multitudes of fans reeling.

Nanami states that Gojo’s reason for wielding jujutsu was not his own survival, nor the protection of others, but rather in pursuit of wanton satisfaction. Gojo does not deny this and neither can we. After all, in chapter 233 it was stated by the narrator that as the possibility of defeat crossed Gojo’s mind, an intense feeling of satisfaction bubbled up in him as well. The truth is, Gojo loves jujutsu. He loves his own strength. He loves to use it, to show it off, to flex. He revels in his own power.

Gojo enjoys being The Strongest.

However, he doesn’t enjoy being The Strongest, alone.

The contradiction in Gojo is that, much like Sukuna, he sees himself as More Than. They are beyond humans, beyond curses, beyond anything of this world. They exist in a realm of their own. Make no mistake, Gojo harbours great affection for those around him. He says as much in 236 (みんな大好きさ寂しくはなかった - I really liked everyone and I wasn’t lonely). But he also admits that there was a separation between himself and other other living creatures. This phrasing is crucial. Gojo is effectively admitting here that from his perspective, other humans are as different from him as any other creature of this world. He doesn’t even really consider them to be the same species. This is further reinforced through his analogy of flowers. He states that you can admire a flower and make it bloom, but you don’t wish to be understood by it. Gojo cares for those around him and he cultivated his students to help them blossom, to achieve their potential, but they were flowers to him. They were inferior beings, incapable of understanding his superior existence, and so why should he open himself up to them? Shoko mentally chastises him for this in chapter 220, pointing out that she was right there alongside him even with the loss of Geto, that all his talk of being alone was idiotic because she was there and he could’ve relied on her. But he didn’t because in his mind, Shoko, like everyone else, is inferior and incapable of understanding him. To him, it is pointless to try.

But where Gojo differs significantly from Sukuna, is that Gojo desperately wants to be understood.

Gojo is so painfully human in that way. Perhaps he wouldn’t be, had he never known Geto. But he did know him, and for those 3 years, Gojo knew companionship. He felt understood by Geto because Geto, being equally The Strongest, was capable of understanding Gojo, in Gojo’s own mind. When Geto defected, he called Gojo arrogant in his own strength for saying killing all non-sorcerers would be impossible for Geto and attempting the impossible was pointless, when such a task would not be impossible for Gojo himself. He asks of Gojo, “are you the strongest because you’re Gojo Satoru, or are you Gojo Satoru because you’re the strongest?”. This exchange, unfortunately causes Gojo to misunderstand Geto’s reason for defecting, or at least to oversimplify it. Gojo’s takeaway is that the issue was in Geto’s inability to keep pace with him. This would further solidify his belief that he exists apart from all of humanity. Yet he could not make peace with that. He mourned Geto’s departure and disliked his newfound loneliness (which, mind you, was only the case because of that very belief that only an equal in strength can understand him).

This would drive Gojo to seek out Megumi, something he could have done at any point in the year since Toji’s death but had no motivation to do. The words he says to Megumi are crucial - “強くなってよ。僕に置いていかれないくらい” or “Get strong. Enough to not be left behind by me.” From this, two things are clear. First, that Gojo has no intention of slowing down. Second, that Gojo wants Megumi to be on his level. He’s essentially seeking out another Geto, one that he won’t lose to their own inability to keep up with him. He’s not willing to come down from his superhuman level to connect with the average - as previously said, Gojo revels in his own strength - but rather he wants others to ascend to his level. Gege stated in the fanbook that the reason Gojo went to find Megumi was because he’s seeking talented people, and the reason he helps problem children like Yuta and Yuji is because they’re strong so he doesn’t care about the other details. There is no mention of righteousness or kindness in his actions here. Now, the fanbook is secondary material so I will always err on the side of the main text taking precedence. But since the main text does not give us any explanation from Gojo as to his true reason for saving Yuta and Yuji, and Gege’s explanation in the fanbook on Gojo’s recruit of Megumi aligns with what we see in the manga, it’s likely that his interest in Yuta and Yuji is indeed purely due to their strength potential, at least at first. He does grow fond of them as people, and he wants them to enjoy their youth. But ultimately, his reason for raising them remains that, selfishly, he doesn’t want to be alone at the top.

His idea of “resetting the crappy jujutsu world” is making it so that life as a jujutsu sorcerer is as fun for everyone as it is for him, or at least as he imagines it would be if his youth hadn’t been interrupted by Geto’s spiral. Being a jujutsu sorcerer is Gojo’s job, but he doesn’t resent it at all. Because unlike all the other sorcerers who are here because they have no choice, or because they feel a sense of responsibility to protect the defenceless, or because they fear being killed by curses and using jujutsu as a retired sorcerer is illegal (looking at you, Kusakabe), Gojo is here because jujutsu is fun. He doesn’t feel that inherent drive to protect the defenceless (he actually finds that part of it kind of exhausting) and he doesn’t feel that fear because no curse could remotely threaten him, so he just gets to enjoy jujutsu for what it is. Gojo wants the same for his students. He wants them to enjoy the experience of life as a jujutsu sorcerer, without fear, and without suffering and being forced to question what the hell they’re even doing this for. If they can be as strong as him, there is nothing to worry about - nobody dies, nobody gets left alone, nobody falls behind. It’s an idyllic picture for Gojo.

There seems to be a misconception that 326 suggests that Gojo’s only reason for training the students was to eventually fight them at their best. That is not the case. Gojo’s love of fighting and Gojo’s desire for an equal are two separate things that only got amalgamated in Sukuna. After all, Gojo never sought to fight Geto. We know they scuffled sometimes, but it’s not like Gojo was constantly trying to instigate a death match. His desire for an equal is, on its own, simply a desire to be understood, something he does not believe is possible by a weaker being. He longs for companionship but won’t let himself find it in people he views as inferior. Regardless of having an equal, Gojo still loves his own strength. He loves toying with opponents, and showing off, and brutal violence. The more challenging the opponent/situation, the further he gets to stretch his limbs.

Fighting Sukuna presented Gojo with an opportunity to satisfy both of these things.

Does Gojo have anything against Sukuna or the way he lives his life? Not really. There isn’t an ideological opposition at play here like there is between Yuji and Sukuna, they just happen to be allied with parties who are in conflict. And, with them both being the jujutsu-loving, strength merchants that they are, they’re genuinely excited at the prospect of fighting each other. Gojo does want and plan to save Megumi, sure, but in any case that requires defeating Sukuna. He wasn’t bluffing when he said he’d worry about that later - fighting Sukuna genuinely takes priority, both strategically and selfishly.

In terms of the fight, Gojo has a blast. He gets to go all out like he’s never gone all out before. He’s pushed to invent things on the spot or legitimately just die. He doesn’t even have to toy with his opponent to keep the fight going, he’s sprinting from start to finish and is giddy with it. This is possibly the most fun he’s ever had.

In terms of the emotion, Gojo has been desperately trying to find someone as strong as him because (he believes) only they can understand him. It’s to the point that he has spent the past decade trying to basically build-a-bear some equals. Suddenly, he’s presented with one, fully formed, requiring no additional shaping on his part. It’s believable that he would be excited to take that chance of being understood, being seen wholly, by the only person alive in the world at this moment that he believes capable of wrapping their mind around him, since they’re both so far above every other living being.

And so Gojo fights Sukuna and pours everything he is into it. He pushes his body to its physical limits, he uses every jujutsu ability he’s ever learned, he comes up with new ideas on the spot, he throws out multiple max output attacks. Everything we have ever been told that Gojo is capable of doing gets put on show in this fight. He does all this because he wants Sukuna to see him in his entirety, because nobody else ever has. If he tried to unleash all of this on anybody else, it would kill them before he could even get a quarter of the way through.

See, on the one hand, Gojo’s self imposed isolation is born of his own arrogance but on the other hand, he’s also right in a way; because jujutsu is a part of the makeup of Gojo Satoru - its something he enjoys and it will always be a part of him. Yet he does not fight with allies because in doing so, he would be forced to limit himself. Like Yuta acknowledges in 235, if they were on the battlefield Gojo would have been unable to perform that AoE purple blast without harming them too. He must choose between being alone when doing jujutsu, or restricting himself in this thing that he loves. This feeds into the notion that they can’t understand him - he literally has to contain himself so as not to be too much for them.

He’s not too much for Sukuna, though.

Against Sukuna, Gojo gets to exist in his entirety, unrestrained, and for that he is appreciative. But we also see Gojo’s kindness, or rather empathy. He personally was satisfied by the fight - he was able to be seen wholly. He could simply have a “fuck you, got mine” mentality about it, but we see that he actually feels sorry to Sukuna for not being able to take everything Sukuna is the way Sukuna was for him. Sukuna could not afford to go all out if it meant dying to the other sorcerers as soon as the fight with Gojo ended. I believe this is why he looked less impressive throughout the whole fight - a Gojo giving it his all puts on more of a display than a Sukuna sticking to a pre-determined plan and doing minimal improvisation. But even though Sukuna didn’t let himself go all out, he still won. This would lead Gojo to believe (and it’s not an illogical conclusion) that if Sukuna had been going all out, Gojo wouldn’t be able to take it all. Gojo feels bad about it because he was unable to be for Sukuna what Sukuna was for him, he feels bad that Sukuna will seemingly never experience that same satisfaction (because, of course, if it’s not Gojo himself giving him that, he thinks nobody else can). This isn’t Gojo feeling bad about himself for being weaker, it is genuine empathy for Sukuna because Sukuna is someone that Gojo does actually perceive as the same species as him, not someone he necessarily considers evil or an enemy.

It’s not as bad as he thinks, though, because Sukuna did take immense enjoyment in this fight. It’s true that he wasn’t pushed to the point of having to give everything here, but he was still pushed further than ever before. Many people have confused “he wasn’t going all out” for “he wasn’t even trying” and that’s such a dichotomous way of looking at things - zero or one hundred. Sukuna was absolutely trying in this fight. For the first time in a thousand years, he actually felt the nervousness of possibly losing, because Gojo’s final purple could have killed him. It’s only because it was an AoE attack and not directly aimed at Sukuna that he survived, and visibly in the worst condition of his life. And after slicing Gojo, he praises him (“you were magnificent” is crazy levels of acknowledgment from Sukuna!) and admits that he will never forget him for as long as he lives. This is coming from the guy that called Gojo ordinary and unenlightened just 6 chapters prior. Gojo moved him, this much is undeniable. And Gojo’s smile in his final moment suggests that he heard Sukuna. In the end, he knows that he did reach him in some way.

(Brief side note: Gojo never says he would definitely have lost to Sukuna even without the ten shadows. What he actually says is simply that he’s unsure as to if he would’ve won. And that’s because he, unlike much of the fandom, recognises that Sukuna’s skill and genius understanding of CE and jujutsu mean that without the ten shadows, he would’ve approached the fight very differently, especially those domain clashes, during which it’s clearly stated that Sukuna refrained from using his CT or even domain amplification too much so that the ten shadows could continue adapting in the background. Take out that element and of course Sukuna has more resources freed up to put into fighting Gojo actively.)

So this is the nuance of Gojo’s character. He’s selfish, yet capable of true empathy. He cares deeply, despite his unfathomable arrogance. His motivations are questionable, without being malicious. He sees himself as beyond human, yet at his core is painfully so. He’s not a hero, nor even really a “good” person. But he influenced those around him in ways they will carry forever.

[zaoldyeck]

Hello i'm back after 3000 years to rant about cynonari bc cyno's second story quest had me FEELING THINGS and i need an outlet. Not that they haven't been rotting my brain consistently for almost two years but this quest... it's just. So much

The way cyrus tells cyno to invite tighnari along for dinner out of nowhere like he's just part of the family, the camping trip with 4 people (not counting paimon since she's basically one of the traveler's limbs) and only 3 tents (i thought tighnari and collei might share a tent but tighnari was alone in his tent when he woke up after cyno had already left so.....), tighnari's one track mind about catching up with cyno the moment he realizes the situation, not even hesitating about following him to the desert which is the bane of his existence, and then glueing himself to his side, cyno saying he's more than just the general mahamatra or a vessel for a god and tighnari smiling so proudly and saying "exactly", the story of hermanubis confirming that he was a tighnarian which makes their lives historicaly intertwined and gives off big soulmate energy, and then cyno looking at tighnari with a little smile after hearing it and saying "i like this story", their little hideout at the akademiya where they used to go to to chat and watch the sunset..... and then there's this

A fam. Family. Ttadition. A family tradition. Family. I'm foaming at the mouth this is too much

Also.

Look at this face of pure fond exhasperation he keeps giving cyno and tell me this isn't love.

[suntails]

a father's love