#i cant take being lonely anymore

[ableedingpromise]

I miss cutting so much I wish I could cut

[sparkleyiff]

Not sure if I'll be doing anything more for artfight this year I am. suffering. sorry :(

[qumiiiquinnquin]

my art will never be good enough !

[cinnamontoads]

man

[magnoliamyrrh]

.

[par-slayyy]

Burning hill but it's my relationship to my passions and burn out

[autisticlee]

I hate how annoying and annoyed and depressed and gross and whiny I get and feel when i'm ignored and rejected and feel alone because no one will talk to me, hang out when I ask, ask me to hang out or chat, or I have to give up on things I really want to do because I need people and have no one. which is basically all the time every day. between trying to make friends and failing and trying to talk to/hang out with people I already know, it's just a constant deep chronic loneliness that nothing seems to help change it and no one is willing to help with it. and I don't have a clue what to do. no one gives useful advice. "be yourself!" hasn't worked in 30 years. "just talk to people!" has caused me more harm than good. "find your people!" is too broad of a statement, how do I know what my people even are? "keep trying it will happen one day!" I literally don't know how to stop trying and rather stop and accept i'm meant to be alone forever and force myself to like it!!! I live ~in the moment/day by day~ so I don't care what will happen "one day" I care about NOW because that's where I am!!!!! the future means nothing to me unless I had a magic ball that showed it to me. so waiting makes it worse! there's no guarantee it will ACTUALLY happen either. congrats of it happened to you. that doesn't help me. thats now in the present time and not my future so why should I care?

what the fuck am I supposed to actually do!

[jackalhadrurusluvr]

repeating my therapists words in my head like the bike message in pokemon

[gaystardykeco]

the problem with vacation is that now in three days i have to go back to working and being alone the rest of the time and idk if i can handle it

[knifehandsgf]

Can it be sad posting hours rn

[yourknightinshiningplastic]

how are you supposed to make friends when you can't drive can't get a job and don't go anywhere but drs appointments and grocery stores and only when your dad takes you and your mom.

[princessbrunette]

im so sleepy but cant fall asleep so OFC im thinking about rafe🙄

imagining like... not being able to sleep bc he's not in bed with you cus he's doing his Important Work Stuff but ur just soooo lonely and its sooooo late !! so you get up and go to his office and ur all pouty and sleepy and grumpy and he says he has to finish his work before he comes to bed but u just need him! and he just can't help but give in so he lets you lay in his lap and sleep against his chest while he finishes up <3 then carries you to bed after omg<33

oh i need this <3

˙✧˖°🍭 ༘ ⋆｡˚

you can’t sleep, and it’s one of those frustrating nights where your body is exhausted — but your brain is just firing off. youre practically half asleep, but you can’t just let go whilst you’re babbling in your head, unable to shut off the noise. you know what the problem is, that being you’d been lonely all day, and there was nowhere to put your thoughts. you didn’t wanna talk anymore, but you knew rafes presence would immediately shut you down.

so, you take matters into your own hands— huffing out your nose as you climb off the bed, one sleep sock pulled up your calf and the other scrunched around your ankle — padding out into the lit hallway with a grumpy squint until you reach his office, pushing the door open.

“you have to come.” you speak, and it doesn’t really sound like words. just slurred, raspy babble from being barely awake. he licks his lips, dragging his eyes lazily away from his computer screen to blink at you.

“i’m not done here, baby.” he is strict but you don’t care, leaning your cheek against the doorframe, barely able to hold yourself up anymore. unexpectedly, tears fill your eyes.

“but i’m just tired rafe, and — and i can’t get any sleep because you’re not there. please, come.” you mewl— fat tears squeezing out of your eyes and he sighs, pushing back in his desk chair. you think he’s going to get up and follow you, but instead he just stares at you.

“come here.” he commands and you don’t have the energy to question or argue, so your feet drag over. “i can’t come to bed unless all of this is done tonight. alright? so— so, you’re gonna have to get comfy here ‘til i’m done.” he gestures to his lap and you sigh, nodding softly as you climb on him, resting your cheek to his shoulder and getting comfy. he has that warm boyfriend smell he gets before he comes to bed every night and your eyes flutter shut.

“okay? good?” he murmurs and you nod once more, body relaxing almost immediately. you’re asleep within minutes.

˙✧˖°🍭 ༘ ⋆｡˚

[scumashling]

Just Alcoholic Whumper Things

CONTENT WARNING: Noncon references, alcoholism, forced/coerced intoxication, emotional abuse/manipulation

Whumpee always going hungry because Whumper is spending food money on booze

Whumper who visits Whumpee in their cell after a long night of solo binge drinking

Whumper rapidly shifting between Happy Drunk, Angry Drunk and Sad Drunk during a conversation with Whumpee

Whumper throwing a bottle at the wall and it shattering near Whumpees head

"I'm glad I have you. None of my drinking buddies want to hang out with me anymore."

Whumper forcing Whumpee to drink with them so they'll feel less alone and worthless.

Whumper making Whumpee take shot after shot until they get sick

Alternatively, Whumper manipulating Whumpee into drinking with by playing into the trauma of being Whumped (you've been through so much. You deserve something to take the edge off.)

Whumper telling Whumpee "I like you a lot better when I'm drunk"/"You know, when I'm this drunk, you almost look cute."

Whumpers own trauma getting triggered while drinking, being too wasted to recognize where they are and who they are with, and starts screaming at Whumpee as if Whumpee is their abuser

Whumper sobbing about how lonely they've been while they strip Whumpee, not noticing they are also in tears

The taste of cheap vodka and stale cigarettes in Whumpee's mouth as Whumper sticks their tongue down their throat.

Whumper who loses days on end due to their binge drinking. Whumper never remembering the nights they took advantage of Whumpee. How can you apologize for something you don't remember anyway?

Alternatively, Whumper who does apologize for noncon but claims the booze made them lose control (it will not stop them from drinking)

Whumper drunkenly inviting Whumpee to stay in their room for the night as an apology. Whumpee choosing to sleep on the floor

Whumper relapsing and taking out the rage and shame they feel on Whumpee

Whumpee who cant even stand the sight or smell of booze without being triggered

Alternatively, Whumpee developing their own drinking problem after getting away from Whumper

[poppy-metal]

friends to lovers with patrick…oh my i have thoughts

you guys both come from rich families, grew up with each other all that good stuff and you are quite literally the only people in your wealthy little bubble who really get each other. highlight of the year is when he comes back from the academy for summer break and holidays. all the time he has he spends with you…of course by the time you’re both teenagers he leaves you every once in a while when a pretty girl he can get with comes along. you’ve known you liked him since you were 10 (this all consuming love that knows you’ll always gravitate towards him) this goes on throughout your teens

He realizes he has feelings for you around the time you’re 17, stupidly when he finally sees you start going out with other people. takes him about a week to fully understand why seeing you with a boyfriend pisses him off…of course when he tells you this, things don’t go as planned (referring to your last post on friends to lovers…like of course youre nervous about this. you love him but if he cheats? god you lose him as a boyfriend and a friend). so you fool around a bit, and while he insists on something more serious, you’re too scared to take the jump

this hurts him of course. hurts him enough that when he leaves that summer in 2006 to go pro, he doesn’t want to keep in contact anymore. yeah it hurts to not respond to your calls or emails, but you broke his heart first? how can he just continue like something is normal. You try to keep track of his life, checking scores, even reaching out to that strawberry blonde boy he brought to your house in the summer before (who doesn’t tell you anything either)

life is so much more boring without your best friend. you try meeting new people all throughout college, spread your wings, but its all so boring. no one is as fun or exciting or loving as patrick. eventually you just give up on the idea he is going to come back to your life, its been four years at this point.

you graduate college and go back to your rich little family. realize he isn’t even in contact with his family, god you really have no connection to this man anymore, the only person you actually love is no longer in contact with you. and quite frankly you’re lonely. so after couple post-grad years of wallowing in your sadness, when your parents start pushing you to get married…it only takes couple weeks for you to agree

everything happens so quickly, meeting the rich prick your parents have picked out, the engagement, god now your wedding is in couple of weeks

are you excited? of course not, you don’t feel anything for this man, but hey there are worse outcomes than becoming a wife to a rich business man. you’re 24 you have the rest of your life to live, at least you can do it knowing you have as much money as possible

so yeah you’re content with the life that you’ve chosen….well that is until patrick mf zweig shows up at your door step after years going “you’re getting married?”

oh well…there goes being content with your husband

-🫀

CHEATING IMMEDIATELY

god, its like. why had he even showed up. you'd been the one to break his heart, you'd grappled with that, stewed with regret over it for years, still did, but he'd been the one to cut you off. to block you on all accounts. so to show up now..... like he'd never left, you're shell shocked. hand over your heart, your engagement ring glinting right there.

its like a full laurie moment. "dont marry him." and you're falling back a step like what, what, you cant say that to me.

but he means it. he'd cut you off but he'd never moved on. and hearing the news of your engagement felt like a wakeup call - like someone threw a bucket of ice water over his head. because he fucking knows you. knows you'd never marry a guy like that - not the girl he knew. and you might have broken his heart, but maybe he should have fought for you harder. maybe he shouldn't have stone walled you. maybe he should have seen you were scared and done everything in his power to prove you were meant to be with him.

its a late start, but he's never been one to quit. he wont give you up again.

[a-certain-romance]

house wife reader pt 3!!! (house wife annon atp)

i wanna expand on shenhe and house wife reader bc i lost my 50/50 for her again

shenhe and housewife reader!!, Shenhe would be troubled to know if her house wife could leave her in an instance. Just so she knows you wont leave her she sometimes bends you over the kitchen counter ripping a hole in her favourite suit to let out her boner to fuck you desperately. She needs to cum in you leave some mark inside you so you get the hint.

She always cums raw inside she always wants your around so if you get an accidentital conception she’ll freak out at first and be confused since are you gonna leave? are you gonna scream at her? But turns out your making a new life with her guess her house wife really is something. she’ll happily learn abt parenting with you just for the slight mistake she caused from her own insecurities

beidou and her house wife reader is really something sometimes you beg along to go into going on the sea trips with her since you cant handle being lonely she reluctantly agrees sometimes but all you can do is sit in her cabin all day

at one point she drank too much and stumbled into the cabin, Full of lust she tears both your clothing off. she first gets you to suck her off getting her already to penetrate your cunt since you both knew how desperate you were for eachother you both just couldnt fuck due to the crew

but i know definetly they can hear that night of intamacy

lets also talk abt the inazuman girls more mainly miko rn

Yae miko is a very busy cunning woman who can only afford to give half of her time to you but that doesnt mean shes highly possesive over you, leaving condoms filled with her cum in your shared bedroom sometimes from how much she wishes she could be there for her house wife or while at night she wants you to rut against her cock and gets hard at the thought of it. All she can do now is rut against your cunt desperatly not trying to wake you up since she knows how hard her house wife works<3

untill she couldnt take it anymore she needed you she needed your tight cunt around her cock

she softly wakes up that night opening your thighs leaving cute bike marks and hickeys with her fangs as a sense of ownership before her buldge from her night suit is finally clear she pulls down her pants down enough for her semi hard cock to appear before slowly inserting the first few inchs

she was intoxicaited and drugged by how good you felt around her cock spasming already to cum inside but she knew she had to make it special she slowly started to join your hips and disattaxh them but honestly she got too desperate and started pouding away till you woke up

“go back to sleep, mommy’s g’nna make you feel real good princess” you knew you couldnt argue with your wife you cook and clean for her everyday and serve her as much as you could

honestly you thought you fsiled as a wife to have theese urges inside of you but turns out your wife was just as desperate as you <3

Dude I lost my 50/50 on her weapon I feel your pain.

Warnings: Smut written by a minor, possessive tendencies (Shenhe, Miko kinda), creampies (Shenhe), mention of pregnancy(Shenhe), power dynamics (Beidou), submission (Beidou), crying (Beidou), blowjob (Beidou), Riding (Beidou), Somno (Miko),

Links to pt1, pt2, & pt3

She’s so out of touch with society that sometimes she’ll get a bit insecure. Wouldn’t you rather want someone who has more knowledge about modern city life? Someone who can treat you to all the things Liyue has to offer? But she doesn’t let these thoughts get the better of her, not when she can do something about it. And that something is you, when she fucks your brains out. Suit be damned, a thin piece of material won’t get in the way of sex. She’s obsessed with the way her cum drips out of you when your pussy gets full of her. She finds it so incredibly hot how you’ve taken so much of her that the only place left for her cum to go is to drip out.

And it’s this same obsession that lead her to this accidental conception. In her time spent with Chongyun, she’s learned a bit or two about taking care of “kids”. And with the help of Cloud Retainer, she’ll try her best to fulfill the responsibilities of a mother.

A small part of her loves it. You’re “ruined” for anyone else. Not that she’s forcing you to stay with her after, but now your lives are intertwined in ways she didn’t anticipate. Her hand holds yours as she pounds away at you during another late night. You’re already carrying her child, so might as well cum inside again.

As much as she loves having you on board, she can’t always protect you from the dangers out at sea. Beidou feels much more comfortable with you safe and sound on land, even though it makes her miss you like crazy. There isn’t much you can do without the proper training needed to be apart of either the Shield or Spear groups so there isn’t a lot to do to pass the hours. There’s drinking of course, and on one of those nights you stop at a few glasses to go back into the cabin.

When she stumbles in with that look in her eye you know what’s about to happen. But here’s the fun part: when she’s drunk, she’s a lot more sensitive. You found this out long before you boarded. And ever since, with Beidou’s consent of course, you use that to your full advantage.

She has the faintest bit of pre-cum leaking out of her cock. You coo at how sensitive she is, aren’t you just so needy? You’ll hold the tip gently in your hand, softly wrapping your hand around it as you guide it towards your mouth. The sound of her whimpers fills your ears as she buckles greedily into you.

“Been waiting so long to have you like this. Damn the crew if they hear us, I need you”

She’s on the verge of tears as you suck her cock almost all the way. Her hand shakily grip the back of your head; weakly helping you bob your head up and down while massaging her balls for leverage. You’re usually the louder once, but when Beidou’s drunk, her breathy moans are hard to conceal.

Her cock will twitch inside your throat. When her eyebrows crease in pleasure and concentration, she paints your throat white with her cum. When you release your mouth from her cock, with a thin string of saliva connecting the two, you replace your mouth with your cunt as you shift to sit on Beidou’s lap.

She tends to sober up quickly after you suck her off, but she’s too overwhelmed to take full control. She’s tends to be the one to dominate and always loves the power trip. When she’s like this for you, she has no qualms over giving the reins to you.

Straddle her and hope there’s no noise complaints the next day.

Miko hates how she can get caught up in her work so easily. It happens a lot more than she would like since there’s always so much to be done. You’re always on her mind however. The image of your tired body cuddled in her arms, or tending to the various chores you assist with, or having your body spread out for her on the sheets. Sometimes in her office she would take her cock out and stroke it until she came. Sure it was a mess to clean up, but she desperately needed the stress relief.

Miko is mindful of your energy. No matter how much she wants it, she doesn’t want to over-exhaust your poor body. And that was how she started to bring up somno with you. You would get your much needed rest, and she would get her much needed release. She’s only settled with grinding but lately she’s been craving more.

Those first few inches felt like heaven. It feels like it’s been so long since she’s had your wet pussy wrapped around her. She was going to make this last. She started slow as she would any other night. A steady pace so your body can get used to the feeling. Her blunt nails dig into your hips as she began to loose control. It’s as if her instincts are being controlled by something else, something primal within her.

She can sense your eyelids flutter open but quietly shushes you before you can say a word. “You’re doing so good, you’re so good for me, princess. Close your eyes and let Mommy use you to get off.” She has big plans for you tonight, too bad you’ll be asleep for most of it.

[karteinss]

Maid cafe | 01: First Time

Dom! Male reader x Sub! Scaramouche

Part 2

Reposted from my Wattpad series

Nsfw, Dom! Male reader x Sub! Scara, deepthroating.

First Time.

You were just going to go home from work but why were you here now? You truly questioned yourself inside your head.

Your heart was beating fastly at the erotic sight Infront of you was too much to take in, you felt yourself getting more aroused at the way Scara was licking your clothed cock like a kitten would.

Scara stares up, eyes wide so innocently as his cheeks were all red and his eyes were staring right at yours. You could see how a small smirk creeps up his face, "Master, are you enjoying this?" He says in between his kitten licks, your boxers were visibly wet from scara's saliva as he kept licking the thin fabric.

The way he refers to you as "Master" made you sweat even more, you gulped to what was about to happen.

The sight was truly erotic, "Like a little kitten" You thought quietly as scara begins to slip off your cheap boxers. The indigo haired man soon revealed your hardened cock, he gaped at the sight as he was now red as a tomato. "You're bigger than I thought, master." he says flirtatiously, your pants were pooled down below your ankles as he starts to give your cockhead soft kitten licks, his hands on the base of it.

Well, you cant lie about the fact that your dick was bigger than average...The thing is, you never used it to anything else other than taking a piss. You had no time for sexual encounters nor masterbating but this truly resembles the porn videos your friends would send to you.

He then rips the condom packet as he puts the condom on the base of your cock as he slips it down to the base further with his teeth. His soft hands were touching the base of your length as you let out a loud groan, you never thought you'd feel such pleasure before, it was truly above your expectations.

If you were to speak to yourself 20 minutes ago, your past self wouldn't believe another man was on his knees trying to suck your dick. Your social skills were ass and you're just basic as hell so to think a pretty guy like this man on his knees Infront of you was trying to suck your dick was completely insane.

You ignored the fact that you paid him to do this.

Your hands were twitching slightly as Scara kept suckling and kitten licking your cock like a lollipop.

It was just like in those erotic novels your perverted friend would talk about, how whenever it came to a blowjob scene they always mentioned how it looked like they were licking it like a lollipop but as you saw it yourself, you realized that it was indeed true.

You threw your head to the back as your chest rose up and down. Your cock was as sensitive as ever even with a condom on you could feel how warm scara's tongue was. You never really used it for anything other than taking a piss, this was a new experience for you.

As Scara kept licking the head of your cock, your breathing became heavier as you could feed your face flushing.

Fuck, you were too into it at this point as you felt your eyes watering from the slightest bits of pleasure. Your hands were itching to hold his hair and thrust your cock onto his face as you kept thinking of the most erotic thoughts inside your head.

Was this the result of being such a lonely virgin in his mid 20s that only had a girlfriend once? If your past self had known it would feel this good maybe he'd hook up in his teenage years, who knows.

As you kept rambling inside your head, you suddenly felt his tongue playfully licking against your cockhead as he licked the slit and even sucking it lightly.

Fuck, this was too good. Your hands were trembling as you couldn't contain your groans of pleasure.

As Scara licked the slit more, you couldn't handle the teasing anymore as you reached out to grab his soft hair as you thrusted your hips.

Scara was taken aback by the sudden action as little tears were slipping from his pretty glassy eyes, you could see how his mouth was swelling from the sudden stretch as he looked so ruined by this point.

You let out a loud groan at the feeling of his warm mouth against your cock to the point you were so close to cumming immediately. The warmth that embraced your cock was oh so delicious, you wanted more. You thrusted your hips more against his mouth as you could feel scara's tongue start to creep up upon your wet cock.

"Gods...I can't last long if you look at me like that, scara.." You say as you fucked his throat faster and faster. Scara moaned around the thickness of your cock that kept ramming inside his throat as he kept trying to skillfully play with his tongue against your cock but he was too far into pleasure to focus on his intended work.

You could feel himself gagging as he was moaning around your cock, you could feel the vibrations of said moans as you groaned louder. The hand on his hair tightened its grip as you felt his hands started to grip your thighs. His eyes were rolled back where you could only see white to it, it truly seemed like hi was lost in bliss. His expressions looked so dirty as you couldn't help but fuck his throat both deeper and faster than before. It seemed like scara couldn't take it anymore as his nails digged deep on your thighs but you didn't mind the pain and instead focus on fucking that warm throat of his.

The vibrations on your dick sent your eyes rolling back as you thrusted deeper into the warm mouth, its warmth sending you pleasure.

You groaned and tugged his hair hard, you were so close to release as you groan even louder. "Fuck! I'm gonna cum inside..!" You let out as you gripped his hair tighter and you finally released inside of the condom.

You were huffing and sweating as you finally realized what you just did with the man under you as you pulled out. Your sweat clung to your hair as it stuck to your forehead. You looked down as you saw how scara was looking so disheveled, his hair was a mess and how it was sticking to his wet forehead as well.

You were breathing heavily as scara did too, all that could be heard throughout the room was both of your heavy breathings as it soon became awkward. You averted your eyes to the downward parts of Scara's body as you saw how his thighs were trembling.

Damn, was my cock that good? You thought to yourself.

You realized how awkward it started to become as you then let out a fake cough to remove the awkward atmosphere, "H-hey..you okay?" You asked, your voice finally made him meet your eyes as he coughed and nodded. "Y-yeah, I'm fine." He says quietly, his voice hoarse as he slowly stood up but you could see how his thighs were trembling ever so slightly.

"Are you sure...? I'm sorry if I was too harsh-"

"No, it's okay." He cuts you off as he wipes the edge of his lips. He leans down Infront of you as he took off the used condom from your and threw it in the trashcan. He walked towards the bathroom as you could hear the faucet streaming and it stopped. At this point, you already got off your high as you kept thinking about what just happened.

Does this mean you're no longer a virgin? You thought to yourself as you sat there in silence but you soon heard Scara's heels clacking on the wooden floor, his hands were now wet from the water, he looked at you as you both looked at each other in silence and awkwardness but then he finally spoke.

"You have to pay now, Qris or via card?" Scara finally says as your eyes widened.

Oh right..you had to pay.

"Qris..."

-

As you paid at the cashier, you looked down at your phone to see how the $20 was already extracted from your bank account as you silently regretted yet another stupid decision of yours. As you finally looked back up, you saw Scara smiling at you.

"Please come again." You didn't know how to respond as you just gave him a polite smile and left the cafe.

Oh, you're definitely not going back there.