#i believe that she is a good person and that she has good intentions

[siphonophoresupernumerary]

Very very very good points! I would say that the final point about trans men can very easily, and indeed necessarily, be extended to trans women and nonbinary people. Did they account for trans people at all? There is built in margin for error there with people in the closet or are not comfortable being out for survey purposes.

I grew up as a man in a christian family and I can see how potent the disdain conservatives, especially christians, have for college. It's a setting that christian ideals don't control that affords the students a lot of freedom and diversity. Diversity generally makes people lose faith in the variety of christianity they were raised in, skewing more progressive.

The increase of women in college can very well be seen as an increase of diversity, but because the paper doesn't explore race, doesn't clarify how or if trans people counted, and only barely touches on sexual orientation, we only GET to see her findings on gender.

Looking at it though I'm also inclined to agree that fewer men are going to college, or believe it when it is asserted. Apparently young college age men are more conservative as is evident from the last presidential election, which fits with my earlier point about christian's anti-college/diversity rhetoric. Though if that's true I might posit that certain political beliefs and religions are in flight, more than any given gender. This fits in with Davis' note about the prevalence of gay men in college, as gay men are less likely to be religious for homophobia reasons. Plus christian ideals are generally "men provide, women nurture" so christian women may well be flying too, but their numbers would be significantly smaller than christian men, and thereby it doesn't stick out when looking at gender alone.

I'm not 100% sure how substack works, but the article is on Matriarchal Blessing, a name which has certain Divine Feminine connotations. Looking up the author, Celeste Davis, I find that her substack is entirely about gender. Which leads me to believe that maybe the author cares mostly or only about gender. Explaining the lack of thurough research that explores each or any of the vectors uncle-fruity indicated. I'm inclined to say that Celeste Davis is biased. Additionally, even though I don't see overt christian themes in there, the presentation of and

Oh. She's an exmormon. I guess that explains the quasi-religious qualities to Matriarchal Blessing. Which include a "bless your wanting" ritual for paid subscription members. Mormons believe in a concept of the Divine Feminine; they believe in a Heavenly Mother, innate power in being a woman, and also the "1950s patriarchal dream" (Celeste Davis' words) which include strict gender roles. The value put into both roles are purportedly equal in policy, though by policy the vast majority of leaders are men. A lot of women find the role they are given restrictive and that looks like what drove Davis away from the mormon church.

Another note to flex my Mormon knowledge, Matriarchal Blessing is a twist on the Patriarchal Blessing. A Patriarch for a stake(geographical collection of church attendees) gives a member a blessing which is a mixture of a blessing, a pep talk, a testimony(or tiny church lesson), and a personal prophecy(fortune telling). The stake's Matriarch is his wife and her role is to record and transcribe the blessing.

Mormon gender roles are written in policy, as close to stone as you get in this modern age. The Family Proclamation says that marriage is between a man and a woman, that the only genders are man and woman, that everyone is supposed to get married (1 man, 1 woman. Explicitly no polygamy), and that men are supposed to provide and women are supposed to care for the household, and finally that sex is ok only within a marriage.

I got distracted and lost the thread I was following but yeah, I don't ascribe malicious intent to Celeste Davis or intentional bias, but I do think her bias is having an effect. For someone who blogged about leaving her religion, it's weird to me that she didn't point out any religious demographics in the article.

Actually. I'm shocked that tumblr passed around an article by an exmormon as Article Of The Day, though a piece of reactionary masculine-critical rhetoric doesn't surprise me in the slightest. There's so few sources in this article but who cares so long as it feels good to read. Which, honestly, I am guilty of too.

Why aren't we talking about the real reason male college enrollment is dropping? (Celeste Davis, Oct 6 2024)

"White flight is a term that describes how white people move out of neighborhoods when more people of color move in.

White flight is especially common when minority populations become the majority. That neighborhood then declines in value.

Male flight describes a similar phenomenon when large numbers of females enter a profession, group, hobby or industry—the men leave. That industry is then devalued.

Take veterinary school for example:

In 1969 almost all veterinary students were male at 89%.

By 1987, male enrollment was equal to female at 50%.

By 2009, male enrollment in veterinary schools had plummeted to 22.4%

A sociologist studying gender in veterinary schools, Dr. Anne Lincoln says that in an attempt to describe this drastic drop in male enrollment, many keep pointing to financial reasons like the debt-to-income ratio or the high cost of schooling.

But Lincoln’s research found that “men and women are equally affected by tuition and salaries.”

Her research shows that the reason fewer men are enrolling in veterinary school boils down to one factor: the number of women in the classroom.

For every 1% increase in the proportion of women in the student body, 1.7 fewer men applied.

One more woman applying was a greater deterrent than $1000 in extra tuition! (…)

Since males had dominated these professions for centuries, you would think they would leave slowly, hesitantly or maybe linger at 40%, 35%, 30%, but that’s not what happens.

Once the tipping point reaches majority female- the men flee. And boy do they flee!

It’s a slippery slope. When the number of women hits 60% the men who are there make a swift exit and other men stop joining.

Morty Schapiro, economist and former president of Northwestern University has noticed this trend when studying college enrollment numbers across universities:

“There’s a cliff you fall off once you become 60/40 female/male. It then becomes exponentially more difficult to recruit men.”

Now we’ve reached that 60% point of no return for colleges.

As we’ve seen with teachers, nurses and interior design, once an institution is majority female, the public perception of its value plummets.

Scanning through Reddit and Quora threads, many men seem to be in agreement - college is stupid and unnecessary.

A waste of time and money. You’re much better off going into the trades, a tech boot camp or becoming an entrepreneur. No need for college. (…)

When mostly men went to college? Prestigious. Aspirational. Important.

Now that mostly women go to college? Unnecessary. De-valued. A bad choice. (…)

School is now feminine. College is feminine. And rule #1 if you want to safely navigate this world as a man? Avoid the feminine.

But we don’t seem to want to talk about that."

[itslikesearcingforsomething]

thoughts on mileven

you know, it’s almost like milevens gaslight themselves when they post about romantic mileven, praising their relationship. as someone who honestly wouldn’t (and i didn’t) ship mileven if there wasn’t byler, i do believe that 100%. i think that most of them cling onto previous seasons and old scenes without any s4 and older foreshadowing context, while bylers think about it constantly. i like platonic elmike, i do. i believe that mike really loves el and cares about her as a close person, but this is clearly not working. you cannot post “relationship goals” with mileven without it falling into misogynistic conservative pipeline. wedding and teen preg, really? el and mike in their vision give mormon vibes. this is all very icky to me. there’s no reason to argue about how mike would be still a good character if there’s no byler endgame. yes, he’s in 80’s we get it, but this is a show made in 2010’s, not a real life. this show has scripts, directors and actors, everything is intentional, even a choice of improvising a part of mike’s “confession” to el in s4. if you really care about eleven, you wouldn’t like the idea of her being with the first boy she saw outside of the lab being her significant other for life, this is a power play, this is borderline abusive. and i’m not over exaggerating, i stand on my words. the way mike treats el is not cute and her anger and pain about him in s4 is so real. listen, i don’t care what type of bare minimum and disrespect in relationship you tolerate, do not spread this shit on everyone else.

[faejilly]

regret

so. literally seven years ago, I started a 'series of firsts' style fluff-fic(let collection) for Malec/Shadowhunters... and I think part of why I got stuck on it in particular (even beyond the not writing much for the last couple years) is because it is in fact supposed to be in chronological order following the show and I had hit a point where I needed a... not!fluff chapter, and I kept trying to just... skip the sad and write more fluff for the fluff fic.

But I'm writing a vignette series for a melodrama. So. Melodrama has been written, of Alec Lightwood Overthinking Things but not being wrong, so how is he supposed to stop? (This takes place after s2e12, which is the disaster of a body swap episode, for anyone not so obsessed with the show as to know that off the top of their heads)

It is not the first time Alec has known that he’s not good enough for Magnus. He’s always known that, since the first time he laid eyes on him.

It is the first time that he thinks Magnus might agree with him.

Magnus said he wanted some space. Tonight (just tonight implied but not stated by the softness of his voice, the brush of his fingers against the seam of Alec’s sleeve) Magnus wanted some quiet.

So Alec left Magnus alone, and now he’s standing in his institute bathroom staring into the institute mirror gripping the white porcelain edges of an institute sink, trying to decide if that was right.

He doesn’t think it was, but he’s not sure if it’s the space that’s wrong, or the just for tonight.

He knows which he wants it to be, but that’s irrelevant.

Magnus likes to retreat when he’s hurt, but that doesn’t mean that’s good for him; Alec might not have known Magnus for long, but he recognizes a protective flinch when he sees it. And if that’s the case, then Alec should in fact head right back out and refuse to let Magnus hide and hold him tight until Magnus feels like he's himself again.

But Alec didn’t believe what Magnus said too many times already, he can’t…

He can’t go against Magnus’ request, not now that he finally made one. Always letting Alec set the pace, waiting for Alec to reach out, for Alec to act, to ask, and when he finally lets himself say what he wants?

It’s less of Alec, rather than more.

Smart of him, of course. Alec would never blame him for it, especially not after Azazel and Valentine and Alec failing him in every way it was possible to fail. There has always been a disparity between what Magnus deserves and what Alec is capable of offering; perhaps it is too large of one to ever be overcome.

Only he knows he wants to keep trying.

He also knows that staring at his mirror and overthinking things is his own protective flinch.

Magnus said he doesn’t know what he needs. Alec is mostly sure that’s true, that if Magnus knew that Alec caused more harm than could possibly be worth it he would say so — but only mostly. Magnus has been abandoned too many times to be the person leaving unless he’s sure.

Not even then, perhaps.

Alec has some idea of how many times Magnus forgave Camille, and she was cruel on purpose, unlike Alec who keeps twisting the knife entirely by accident.

If Magnus won’t do it, Alec will have to. He refuses to walk Magnus down a road to hell paved by his own so-called “good intentions”. He’ll stay away forever if that’s better for Magnus, regardless of how Alec feels about it, will feel about it, will always feel about Magnus. It’s only right, not letting Magnus suffer the consequences of trying to be involved with–

Alec stops himself there.

Anything he thinks to call himself, any self-assessment he can manage right now, will be more severe than anything Magnus would think, or say, or even accept if Alec tried to say it, so it won’t help him decide what to do.

He has to figure out how to help in a way that Magnus will accept, and if he leads with a list of all his failures, Magnus will be happy to try and make Alec feel better and aggressively avoid letting Alec try to help him.

Alec doesn’t need to feel better. Aldertree’s gone, Isabelle’s back, (Imogen’s difficult but familiar), and Jace is, while still fucked up, at least not trying to smother the parabatai bond so tightly that Alec feels like he’s being strangled in his sleep every night.

So.

Alec sighs, lets go of the sink, forces his shoulders to relax.

This is the first time that Magnus has said he needs space, but considering the politics of their lives, even now that Valentine’s in custody (especially now, considering everything Herondale did to Magnus in Valentine’s name), it probably won’t be the last.

Alec can’t override that, not just because he’s sad and guilty and young and stupid.

He just has to learn better.

He’s always had to be better than he is, he’s not sure why he thought things with Magnus might be different.

That’s not Magnus’ fault though, and he can’t let himself start to think about it in terms of hopes dashed or desires failed because then he will be upset at the only person who has never ever let him down, despite all Alec’s failures and stumbles.

He doesn’t deserve Magnus, of course he doesn’t, but that’s all right. It’s Magnus’ turn to make a choice, and he can have all the time and space he needs to do so.

Alec will wait.

He’ll wait forever, if he has to.

He’ll wait past forever, this life and the next; he’s already made his choice.

[sileisce]

it's only one dimensional when you push it towards that. just like it's only complex when you push it towards that. we can complain about timelines all we want, it's a moot point towards a highly common trope in fiction. characters fall in love quickly. not everyone wants to wait for the romance as it's usually a side plot to add to the story unless it's primarily a romance. and even then not all romances are slow burns.

the characters lose their complexity when you try to justify actions as good or evil and not view them as just existing in their own lives. mapleshade's vengeance is not a book about good or evil, who's more right or wrong. it's a book about grief. if it wasn't the complexity of appledusk accidentally killing birchface, and birchface being the son of oakstar and brother of frecklewish, wouldn't have been thrown in. every character was put in the most impossible of situations. every irrational action is done out of grief and/or self gratification(appledusk turning his back to hurt her even more for example, it's more fun to read it as a 'i want to hurt you for hurting me') he didn't see what mapleshade saw or how she was treated, how their kits were called monsters. who would throw out kits so young? he only saw that she made the kits cross the river after she was told earlier that day not to.

the kits weren't doing fine, they struggled to make it to one stone out of 3 and a final stretch to a bank. and at the end reedshine and perchpaw were there so even if he was to have trouble he truly had nothing to fear. mapleshade barely ate and was not in a good condition, she wasn't at her strongest.

and i never said any behavior is okay but; appledusk was hated for years because people never read the books and viewed mapleshade's vengeance as a cheater revenge story (when mapleshade, even in the end, wanted appledusk as a mate and that's her reason for attacking reedshine, who wasn't involved in her delusions at all). she's an unreliable narrator that twists things to benefit her (not with the intent to cause harm at the start, but because she believed everything will work out)

i really don't care when people hate characters, but i don't like when people try to dumb down what others see, or that hatred is solely because they like another (usually male) character more. even the whole 'mapleshade babytrapping appledusk' is literally the dumbest thing in existence. he had reedshine he didn't need to get with mapleshade. i literally do not value the opinions of people that hate characters like nightcloud, mapleshade, squirrelflight but love/excuse brambleclaw/crowfeather/ashfur/appledusk because they were 'sad'. too many people hate admitting their male favorites do harmful and abusive things, meanwhile the females are satan just for being snappy.

and yes when it comes to crowfeather, the defense of him and hatred of nightcloud is primarily misogyny. he was a classic 'tragic heartbroken guy'. not even once but twice in one arc. that's double 'leave my baby alone!' territory. we see how often people make the female characters villains in favor of males. i wasn't involved in the fandom for years because of the misogyny.

i hate how much nightcloud has been hated, we can compare nightcloud's treatment to how bluestar was treated because of thistleclaw. people took all of bluestar's complexity and put it on a cat who's personality is abuser just because he was a guy.

with breezepaw, he was abused by crowfeather, who had no reason to put his hands on his son, even with claws sheathed. hatred for breezepaw and people excusing that can be boiled down to people's hatred of kids which often goes hand in hand with misogyny. they hate breezepaw for being immature meanwhile are okay with a grown adult putting his hands on and berating him.

there was also no good reason for nightcloud to drag crowfeather away like that, they're just a broken family because neither cat truly loved each other. if you don't want to see complexity in the characters that's fine but many do see what they were going for and aren't afraid to elaborate on it. it's just so ruined by misogyny from both the books and the fandom. but i also i feel you can't acknowledge posts you link while at the same time trying to say the books lack complexity. even the fact breezepaw's xenophobia is directly from crowfeather being a bitter ex show's complexity.

i also feel a lot of the defense of abusive behavior by the writers is due to being older and abuse being more normalized in those generations. those generations are more likely to forgive and defend misogyny and abusive parents/partners who only apologize on their death beds.

sorry for length and if this is all over the place. i am bad at making long posts but i personally see complexity in many of the characters and while i speak up when i disagree with something, i don't want to be seen as one of the people who's so called 'enjoyment' for male characters is actually just rooted in misogyny. it wasn't my intention to come off that way. i just often see a dice where others see a coin

anyway if people are allowed to make excuses for bramblestar and fucking appledusk, I should also get to say that nightcloud did nothing wrong

[hyog-blog]

I love how in this scene we see more of the wish-granting, but this time it is performed by Zhao Yuanzhou, free of charge, in his selfless manner that doesn't need anyone's sacrifices or murders or even someone else's energy - only their wish, and intent, the willingness.

And he grants Pei Siheng's last wish just like that, a stark contrast to Cheng Huang who was fooling around with humans collecting their energy trying to change his own narrative, to bring back the past that was no longer there, the goddess who has already died, because he couldn't let go of her even after his own death.

And we can talk as much as we want about Zhao Yuanzhou evading whatever he's done and not atoning for his sins in a grander scheme of things, but he actually does it all the time - but it's in the smaller details. In the kindness of his heart, in the attention to the people around them, in that little bit of help that usually either goes unnoticed or he simply doesn't even talk about it - he just carefully and casually does something good and only we as viewers can see and appreciate it (all those small instances of helping Bai Jiu or giving his cloak to Wen Xiao and Xiao Zhuo or taking the blow so the others don't get hurt).

His companions come a long way before acknowledging his true beauty and kind-hearted nature, and I believe that yes, some of it might stem from guilt over the things he has done in the past, but ultimately it doesn't matter why you do good things - you just do them and they become a part of you and they slowly change you, turning you into someone better, someone more than you were before. And what may have started as atonement for the wrongs he had done, effortlessly became part of nature because of how empathetic he has always been (I suspect, for a long while having to deal with malicious energy on a regular basis).

I love how his kindness is merely a whisper in the dark, a hidden secret not many people know about or even notice, but once they do - everything changes, and they give him all that love that he has never asked from them, but was probably yearning for, as well as absolution.

He didn't even know A-Heng personally, but he knows Pei Sijing and he knows and probably feels just in how much pain she is. So he creates this little bit of happiness for them, just like that, using his own energy. And it's so beautiful, and it tells volumes about his character.

[vigilantesyd]

.

[sysig]

“It could be that the loss of her children drove the Queen deeper into her darker desires...but, I don’t believe she was fighting against them that hard before that particular tragedy. No monster does.” (Patreon)

Bonus:

Hmm, wonder what he could cover those holes with :3c

[icewindandboringhorror]

examining a seemingly normal image only to slowly realize the clear signs of AI generated art.... i know what you are... you cannot hide your true nature from me... go back where you came from... out of my sight with haste, wretched and vile husk

[butterscotch-goat]

If venice is sinking by spirit of the west also has serious escapism vibes to me. Idk

Len coming in clutch with the perfect song recs oh my god????? You're so right????? The vibes are so there I could imagine an OC amv to this so easily. It covers like all the themes bro....you're so right Len you're so right thank you mister music listener.....I cant at the moment but I will most likely be making doodles based on some of those lyrics soon....

also I looked up the sculpture mentioned in the song (Marino Marini's sculpture “L’Angelo della Città” for those who are unaware) and IT IS SO FUCKING FUNNY????????? WHAT A THING TO SCULPT

[kariachi]

Midnight Rant #5 billion and 12 on Charmcaster and Kevin- That woman's fucking AF premiere.

Because we have Kevin, very obviously in a very bad place. He's being retraumatized, his girl's cut back hard on spending time with him with no explanation, our boy is going through it. And then he makes a friend, according to WoG over the course of a few months, in a grown woman. And it's great, it's fine, and then she starts macking on him. And then she plants a kiss on him despite him shutting her down. And while doing that she literally takes control of his damn mind, just fucking harpoons that poor boy's bodily autonomy, forces him to turn against his loved ones. All because she never actually gave any sort of shit about him and from the very start was using him to get to and hurt his girl. This relationship that he thought was forming for months was all a ruse, her using him and then abusing him. And this is

So painful for poor Gwen. Can you believe that Kevin didn't have faith that her pulling back with no explanation meant she was working hard to fix him, after the whole three-odd months they'd been together? And to have Charmcaster come back starting problems. Oh poor Gwen, everyone is so mean to her.

And it's not just in the fucking show, it's in the fandom as well, this idea that the shit Kevin goes through matters in how it affects Gwen and not in how it would have to affect him. Just, that had to be such a fucking painful if not straight up traumatizing event. Charm fucked with his goddamn mind. She made him think she cared about him only to hurt him.

Congrats, Charm, I'd say you were only a few steps below Servantis but he at least let the kids have a degree of autonomy and wasn't on screen macking on them. Slow clap, you're even keel.

Just, I sometimes remember that we have a whole episode surrounding Kevin, already openly in an awful headspace, being groomed and straight up mindcontrolled, and the big take-away is how much the situation hurt Gwen and how bad a boyfriend he is for not reading her damn mind. And it drives me up the fucking wall.

Especially when you remember that he spends that season in his underwear, I'm sorry but the parallels to the treatment of imperfect SA victims write their damn selves.

And when you also keep in mind that when Mike is pulling the 'charm them and thrall them' bit it's treated, by the show and fandom, as him being an irredeemable predator and his victims have every right to hate him forever and wish horrible things on him, but Charm gets to have the 'oh poor Charmcaster' treatment and Kevin's thinking she can go fuck herself is treated as a flaw in his character by the show and ignored by fandom.

Because in the end the disparity comes from the same place as the repeated physically abusive acts Gwen commits against Kevin, as Looma's threats being treated as humor, as Gwen's thinking they're romantic being treated as humor- plain old misogyny. Mind the misogyny isn't all of it, but the age old belief that this sort of shit committed by women against men isn't a concern, and in fact may even be treated as ridiculous, because women are too weak to hurt men plays a big role. Doesn't matter if it's a grown woman grooming a mentally ill teenager or a teenage girl shoving her boyfriend into freefall- she's just a girl so of course what she's doing isn't actually dangerous or harmful, because women aren't capable enough for such things. Which then plays into the age old sexist bullshit that men are simply too strong and rough to be hurt, and to be hurt by a girl especially- physically, mentally, however- is funny because it means they're weak.

And that's not even getting into the 'a guy is always eager' bullshittery.

Just, for the love of fucking christ...

[ficsempai]

Getting older really changed my perspective on Natasha somehow, im more forgiving and compassionate than I used to be with her.

She’s a child.

I guess she really was young, uh, that’s definitely something you realise with age.

[kavehater]

I’ll never understand younger siblings whining about their older siblings moving away like I bet yall were nasty and annoying too like wow all those years and you claim to adore the older sibling and post oh woe is me the older sibling abandoned me … girl … the older sibling didn’t have a parental certificate or anything.

[aq2003]

series 3 is so frustrating because there is like a shining core of pure diamond underneath the problems . like conceptually it rocks so incredibly hard. but the problems

[7-oh-ta1]

When I see ppl hating on king rhoam i start blacking out and seeing visions

[girlcrushau]

[nulltune]

what  brand  of  stupid  are  you  ?

Himbo stupid.         You're just an all around kind person who's a little too gullible. You are knowledgeable on weirdly specific trivia but a lot of common knowledge seems to have slipped you. You probably aren't the best at math but by god can you fix a flat tire. Everyone remembers you as a friendly person, you just might need to brush up on your reading comprehension again

tagged: @poweys TYSM 🫶💞 I LOVE THIS QUIZ SM LMAO

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