I have thoughts to articulate on how N.Elias's analisys of the (artificial, european) concept of "civilisation" being a natural predecessor to and justification of colonialism Does Not Ever mention the USA because at the time it was still in the middle of its transition into having a national conciousness of "this is the (static, perfect) model of democracy and we should export it everywhere". And now its. yk. been doing that to the detriment of the rest of the world. But I'm notoriously bad at articulating thoughts. Anyways read Norbert Elias and think about the current panopticon-like state of things and what the west did with it 👍for me
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it may be time to consider that i probably do in fact have depression or some type of mood disorder that causes depressive episodes
or i could go watch star trek and forget about it for now
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Still unwell about Rilke and PH
I love the dark hours of my being.
My mind deepens into them.
There I can find, as in old letters,
the days of my life, already lived,
and held like a legend, and understood.
Then the knowing comes: I can open
to another life that's wide and timeless.
So I am sometimes like a tree
rustling over a gravesite
and making real the dream
of the one its living roots
embrace:
a dream once lost
among sorrows and songs.
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I'm watching Magpie Murders (I gotta tell you WHY but I'll do that in the tags like a cultured bitch), and all I now am considering is Super Smart Jeeves being a private investigator super famous etc and his daft and dopey assistant Bertie Wooster. Bertie can still be rich and posh and all, he hired Jeeves once and now just sort of hangs around and trails after him.
They are gay and have lots of great gay times obviously also.
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despite the fact that, for at least 14 years, my Notable Dance Ability™ (to the point that every single new teacher and friend AND the artistic director I last auditioned for have to comment on it and/or make me demonstrate) is That Girl Can Jump, I've never thought much about being naturally good at it aside from joking about my thighs but now I'm trying to figure out how to teach kids the progression from like baby jumps to fun jumps and my brain is just like well. you just. you Just Do It. that is All.
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