#people asks me stuff
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I was thinking on the recent chapter, and I realized that the S1 ending song, 'Namae Wo Yobu Yo' is so connected to this chapter, and Shin Soukoku?? How else do you recognize somebody, without face or voice? It's one of my favorite openings, but it definitely reminded me even more of them, now the story has progressed even further, the parallels in the animation too, are so connected to the chapter!^^
Thank you, I will. Be thinking about this for the next six years.
#I got stuck on this ask because I felt like I needed to add something but really what is there to add?#They love each other your honor#atsushi nakajima#ryūnosuke akutagawa#sskk#shin soukoku#bsd#bsd ch 119#people asks me stuff#I'm always so emotional over sskk calling out each other's names. You know how it is...#To be fair it's something I've always gotten emotional over no matter the characters#It's just... The simplicity and rawness of the act.#When emotions are so strong and the reaction so spontaneous there's really no other words than the other's name as it is.#It's so simple and striking. Sometimes less is really more.#No other words could fit but the other's name because that's all that matters– their whole their being their existence. Them. Their name.#And with sskk specifically there's this kind of imaginary of running after each other–#as rivals‚ and as lovers‚ because there's really no difference in that you know?
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I cant watch the ep but ur reactions are making me so nervous...
Great news Anon, you're still in time to not watch it! Akutagawa not smiling? What are you talking about? Take my hand, we're going reread chapter 88 together!
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Aspec men deserve much more respect and recognition in the aspec community than they receive. They often face a different form of aphobia specific to them ("men are naturally sexual they can't be ace" "all men are unromantic that's not unique") this rhetoric is spouted by many, even members of our own community and I hope for a day where that is no longer the case. As an ace and demiro woman (demigirl but that's beside the point) I want to encourage folks to take the time to give the aspec men in their lives support and to the aspec men reading, you are who you say you are no matter what people say and you deserve the world. I'm sorry for the ways in which toxic masculinity has harmed you. You are a valued member of the aspec community and the queer community as a whole. No ace or aro person is broken and neither are you. I'm sorry if anyone has ever told you otherwise.
#asexual#asexuality#ace stuff#actually ace#ace culture#acespec#ace men#aromantic#aro#aro stuff#aro community#arospec#aro men#aspec#aspec stuff#aspec community#aspec culture#ace pride#aro pride#aspec pride#lgbtq+#lgbtpride#lgbtq rights#lgbtqia#I make a post about this annually on april fifteenth#why you ask?#a couple years back I'd come across some people saying the type of things I mentioned about aspec men#the hateful monstrousness of what they'd said pissed me off and I wrote a rant about it#I've since gone on to make a post once a year on the day I'd made the first#btw last year's really gained quite the traction I still get notifs about it! I'm glad this message has reached so many people this year
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My page for @sheikahzine; about Impaz's duty to her village, empty of people and full of memories.
[id in alt text]
#legend of zelda#loz#twilight princess#loz tp#i'm still reeling that someone sent me an ask about this one.. that they took the time to find my tumblr and tell me they liked it#it really meant a lot; thank you to anyone that stops to leave comments like that. they make me happy#but yeah! here's the usual symbolism ramble:#i thought it'd be cool to have the 'spirits' flowing one way and the cats walking through them the other way#to kinda show the difference in life inhabiting the village in the past and present#link's face is covered because impaz was just waiting for 'the hero' so his clothes are what matters; not his face#and it (hopefully) gives a surreal and intangible sense to 'the hero' she could only hope would actually show up#you can feel free to interpret the glowy blue sheikah as ghosts or just as memories of the past! i couldn't decide either way#the one on the bottom left is oot impa since she's implied to be the village founder. so i guess she would be a ghost actually?#fan art#my art#project stuff#and ahhh the book-- everyone's stuff is so beautiful!!#especially the writing. some of the fics made me really tear up and some were so fun and clever. i really love them#a lot of them captured the sheer burden of the role of the sheikah; all of the time and grief and doubt#i know i always say this stuff about every project but. the people i get to work with in these are truly so skilled every time
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Thanks to artfight, I’ve finally finished a detailed, official dbhc cub reference! :D
(I’ve put his Artifight description below the cut, which has a more detailed explanation of his timeline, lore, and aesthetics! >:3)
-ˋˏ ༻ ❁ OVERVIEW ❁ ༺ ˎˊ-
Name: C.B.F.N.4000 (Cub) Pronouns: He/Him Species: Android Height: 5’9’’ Associated Visual Themes: vex, ghosts, explosions, mischief, scientist aesthetic, potions, potionmaking, sleepy/tired aesthetic, conspiracies
-ˋˏ ༻ ❁ ABOUT ❁ ༺ ˎˊ-
CBFN4000 is an au version of MCYT Hermitcraft’s Cubfan, set in my DBHC (or Detroit Become Hermitcraft) AU! This au is inspired by the 2018 game Detroit Become Human, but not because it really has anything to do with DBH—I simply yoinked the android mechanics and incorporated them into the world of Hermitcraft. It began as a S8 au, and has roughly followed the hermitcraft timeline up to the present!
Cub was the last android made during Season 8. While many of the hermit androids were made at the beginning of season 8 and a few were made for season 9, Cub was finished and activated mid-late Season 8, around the time when Hermits started noticing the Big Moon. Cub’s model ended up being a sloppy experiment in deviation, as Doc suggested they try to transfer deviancy to an android upon activation to try and avoid traumatic situations that might cause an android to deviate violently or upsettingly, such as Etho’s, Tango’s, or Mumbo’s experiences. While this went relatively well initially, it clearly wasn’t very thoroughly thought out, as Xisuma (who is normally so adamant and detail-oriented when it comes to assuring the androids’ safety with experiments like this) wasn’t truly himself due to external manipulation and mostly left a relatively young-deviant Doc to carry out the project himself.
Cub, though adjusting to sentience rather well at first, very quickly became wrapped up in the Big Moon happenings on the server, new personality and inexperience to emotions like fear and ignorance completely overwhelming his young system. He became obsessive over the implications and consequences of the Season 8 Moon Apocalypse, joining the Mooners and spreading his conspiracy theories religiously throughout the server as he descended into madness. The insanity was like a virus to his programming, pervasive and all-engulfing, and Cub’s final attempt to free himself from the Moon’s impact with the Earth—to launch himself on a llama into space via potion-powered TNT(insane btw)— left his hands and feet singed and cracked to ruin.
The experiment, considered a horrific failure by a deeply shameful—and more awake—S9 Xisuma, left Doc and Xisuma with the decision to reset him for the new season, and they ended up pairing him with a hermit like they had done with the other androids until they had found deviancy enough to pursue their own projects. So, at the start of season 9 and fresh after a reset, Cub was paired with Scar. Naturally, because Scar is… Scar, Cub deviated almost instantly after being given to him, and very quickly adopted the iconic lazy, stoic, amused attributes normally associated with Cubfan. Scar’s tendency towards mischief and general shenanigans grew instantly on Cub, and the two were an immediate inseparable pair. So much so that when Scar began rambling one day about his Season 5 Hermitcraft Shenanigans (where deals with the Vex may or may not have been involved), Cub immediately stated he was interested in being in on it. Whatever “it” means. It’s unclear if Cub also made a deal with the vex or became connected to them in some other way, but… well, he got Doc’s help to trick out his eyes, hair, and back to best fit the part. Scar is very jealous that he can't magically make himself have the same features to match.
Cub is closest with Scar, but he gets along just as well with any of the other hermits! He’s close with Jevin and many of the other redstoners like Etho and Doc, who are the other two androids I’ve put on artfight!
-ˋˏ ༻ ❁ EXTRAS ❁ ༺ ˎˊ-
Cub's eyes can light up in the dark, and he’s the only android who has edited his programming so that the default state of his LED is white, not blue. It still will go yellow and red if his processors are working particularly hard, but he’s replaced the blue setting on his LED with white to better match the Vex vibe. Cub has all of the vibes of a fae. If that’s anything <3
#dbhc#dbhc art#dbhc ref#dbhc cub#cubfan#hermitcraft#cubfan135#hermitcraft au#art escapades#writing everything out in a really succinct/condense way is actually really helpful#I might add Etho and Doc’s artfight descriptions to their own reference pages actually#just because it’s really helpful to have all of the lore in one place LOL#I always wrap up these ideas in my head and save them for when I can make art to reveal the plot dramatically yknow#but for characters that aren’t really my priority right now it’s kind of nice to just get the info down#especially for the people who ask about specific characters a lot#SO ANYWAY#I ramble#if anyone has any opinions on this method of relaying dbhc lore feel free to lmk!#there will obviously be things that I keep hidden :3#Bc sometimes art reveals are the best >:3#but for stuff I might not get to in a while…. yeah#I don’t mind it#ALSO#HILARIOUS TO ME THAT freshly awoken cub reminds me a lot of IRL cub LMAO
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whos he texting?🤨
#up next on top ten worst type of people you could ever meet……#also thanks for all the sweet asks and stuff it really makes me happy that people enjoy my art 🤗 if theres anything u think would be fun lmk#always open for requests!!!#do not excpect too muxh from me tho…… hopefully i dont disappear for another year like last time 😅😓#just kidding#my art#obey me#omswd#obey me!#levi obey me#omswd leviathan#obey me leviathan#obey me levi fanart#levi om#omswd levi#levi#leviathan
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pick your battles
#my art#my stuff#art#comic#original art#pride 2024#pride month#trans allegory..... or not even allegory. just trans .... ^_^#i technically cannot come out yet but i don't think the people who i need to not see this stalk my tumblr#i know they stalk everything else like my twitter and my instagram but this might be safe#so fuck it we yap. this is a comic about picking your battles#this is a comic about how for almost a year now everyone at home in singapore has been crying about my sore throat#my terrible fucked up voice. my you know. etc#i came out as not cis and using they/them pronouns in 2015 when i was 14#but no one ever used my pronouns. none of my classmates or friends even up until i left for college in 2020#from 2020 onwards every year i wrote an angry vulnreable essay about how much it hurts that they dont remember#and people would dm me apologizing on their hands and knees and commending my bravery#and then forget about it all over again. id ont mean 'they misgender me and then catch it and apologize and correct themselves'#i mean they dont even get that far#and so you might ask yourself: why have you kept them around all this time?#and i would have to explain that by pure bad luck i grew up in the most conservative close minded community#that all of my ex classmates that stayed in singapore are cishet and upper middle class and chinese singaporean#that i Am the trans person. that they were able to ignore me for a decade partially because there was no one else#so this is a comic about how there is dignity and grace in staying in the closet sometimes#about how not everyone deserves to see you at your happiest. about how some people can go fuck themselves#you know your truth and THATS THE ONLY THING THAT MATTERS!!! YEAH!!! i love you
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FORGETTABLE-AU (page 82-85)
THAT LAZYBONES!!
[BEGINNING] [PREVIOUS] [CONTINUE]
#So sorry it took me almost 2 weeks to post these#I was busy irl but ALSO I had too much fun doing extra art and forgot to work on these for like 3 days lmao#NOW THIS TIME I DO HAVE SOME THING TO SAY#YAY RIVERPERSON! SO MANY PEOPLE GUESSED CORRECTLY!#It wasn't that hard#We know Papyrus knows the river person#are they friends? idk BUT I PERSONALLY THINK THEY ARE#I just LOVEEE looking at the dialogue and making connections#I referenced one of the lines from the river person here...sometimes they'll ask you if you know any game you can play with a dog...#They said they were “asking for a friend...”#And I couldn't help but think about Papyrus' problem with the annoying dog LMAO#+ Papyrus seems very excited to know if the river person is there when you call him nearby that area#Okay so... now ...some comic thing that I made up but also didn't...#“FLOWEY DOESN'T KNOW WHO THE RIVER PERSON IS?”#okay so...#I feel like#It's not very common for them to be there...#When talking with Undyne around that area it's kind of *unclear* if she knows about the river person being there....#She tells you about the river connecting different areas and that you should “jump in”#She then clarifies that's the only thing they got for public transport#AND LIKE? It's unclear if she's telling you to jump in the boat (OR IF SHE KNOWS THERE'S SOMEONE WITH A BOAT) or is she's literally telling#you to jump in the river?????#Anyways...so...that's that#HEHE Flowey and Papyrus finally arrived at the house! WOHOO#Sans is too lazy to bring his old stuff to the surface! (or does he still think he'll end up back in the underground eventually?)#undertale#undertale comic#forgettable-au-comic#papyrus#flowey
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MARELLA'S 12TH TUMBLR ANNIVERSARY CELEBRATION @rhaenyratargaryns and @elssbethtascioni requested: Ted Lasso or Leverage
People like that, corporations like that, they have all the money, they have all the power, and they use it to make people like you go away. Right now, you're suffering under an enormous weight. We provide leverage.
#leverage#leverageedit#tvedit#marellas12thyearceleb#the moving stuff thingy yeah#chewieblog#cinematv#tvarchive#mediagifs#filmtvcentral#userlolo#userrobin#uservix#singinprincess#usertoph#tuserheidi#janielook#usergiu#userbuckleys#rogerhealey#quicklings#usermimsi#tusermalina#userdosa#usercats#fourteenthofaugust#userholloway#userselenamarie#funny how a terrible season changed my choice lmao; if you asked me this 2 years ago my answer would be different skdjksjkd#anyways more people watch leverage challenge! show of all time fr
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from where do you read the manga?
I know this is not what you asked for, but here’s a masterlist of bsd resources I’ve used over the past year. Because every time I join a new fandom I always think “oh, I sure wish there was an all-inclusive masterlist that explained in detail how the material is divided and where to access to it instead of having to dig in myself”. So, this is for you January 2022 Kyotag, and for anyone else who might find this useful! I trust posting this on Tumblr is safe, but please do not share this outside of Tumblr in any way; it’s not for me, it’s for all the people who care to share. Specifically, do not share this on Twitter in any way or form. I will unleash a wild pre-promise Akutagawa after you if you do.
Edit: My biggest thank you to @amythedemisimp, who helped me expand and enrich this list. For your priceless contribution, thank you so much!!! Edit 2: Thank you so much u/barnacleunderthesea for reaching out and sharing new stage play subtitles!!! Check out their BSD English Content Archive here.
BSD resources masterpost
Before visiting any of the websites listed below, make sure to install and activate the uBlock Origin extension and to be using Firefox web browser.
Bungou Stray Dogs Story by Kafka Asagiri, art by Sango Harukawa. The original manga. Ongoing, monthly chapter release.
• MONTHLY CHAPTER FANTRANSLATIONS: translator 1 • Website 1: Official English translation of the manga up to volume 19 / chapter 83 (including all the extra volume contents and omakes) and fantranslations from chapter 84 upwards. It’s my favorite streaming platform for the manga as it grants easy access and download to most of the official translation (the quality is not the best, a sligthly blurry 900×1350px per page, but it is what it is). When visitng on mobile, there’s surges of adds on certain days for some reason, but overall it’s manageable. • Website 2: Official translation up to volume 20 (chapter 88), fantranslations after that. • Website 3: Official translation up to volume 23 (chapter 104), fantranslations after that. Lacks all the additional volumes content (and thus the first page of every volume since it’s in colour). Includes the Japanese raws up to chapter 104, so it’s useful if you need to quickly check the original. Denies download of the pages, and features a watermark. • Website 4: All the chapters fantraslated. Recommending it because it’s always nice to read different translations (and endearing too, at times. You wouldn’t want to miss “Dazai Osamu – Ability: Human Failure”), and because it’s for some reason the only website my university’s wi-fi allows me the access to, so shout-out to it. • Website 5: Raws from chapter 79 up to date. The image quality (1164×1618px) is generally better than the official manga English release.
Bonus chapter 1 • Bonus chapter 2 • Bonus chapter 3 • Bonus chapter 4 • Bonus chapter 5 /// (alt. translation)
DVD omakes
• DVD omakes English fantranslations masterlist • Vol 4 omake English fantranslation • Vol 9 omake • DEAD APPLE DVD omake English fantranslation • Folder with all the avaible omakes fantranslated in Chinese
Wan! Story and art by Neco Kanai. Gag spin-off manga. Ongoing.
• Link 1: Download link of the official English translation of the first four volumes of the manga • Link 2: Chapters 1-22; fantranslation. • Link 3: Masterlist of fantranslated chapters • Link 4: Various misc chapters fantranslations • Link 5: Various misc chapters fantranslations • Link 6: Various misc chapters fantranslations
Gaiden: Ayatsuji Yukito VS. Kyōgoku Natsuhiko Story by Kafka Asagiri, art by Oyoyo. Manga adaptation of a spin-off novel. Currently in unofficial hiatus (?).
• Link 1: Download link of the official English translation of the first two volumes of the manga • Website 1: Fantranslation of all the released chapters
DEAD APPLE Story by Bungo Stray Dogs DA partners, art by Gun_Zi. Manga adaptation of the novel adaptation of the Dead Apple Movie. Completed.
• Link 1: Download link of the official English translation of the four manga volumes • Website 1: Fantranslation up to chapter 13 (discontinued)
BEAST Story by Kafka Asagiri, art by Shiwasu Hoshikawa. Manga adaptation of an alternative universe spin-off novel. Completed.
• Link 1: Download link of the official English translation of the four manga volumes • Website 1: Official English translation. Denies download of the pages, and features a watermark. • Website 2: Fantranslation • Website 4: Raws (1115×1600px)
Dazai, Chūya, Age Fifteen Story by Kafka Asagiri, art by Shiwasu Hoshikawa. Manga adaptation of a spin-off novel. Completed.
• Website 1: Official English translation up to volume 2 (chapter 10) • Website 2: Fantranslation • Website 3: Raws (1115×1600px)
Anthologies Six official anthologies, compilations of gag and slice-of-life oneshot chapters by various authors.
• Anthologies raws and translations masterlist
Novels Ten light novels set in the bsd universe and written by the bsd author that complete, expand and enrich the bsd story.
• Link 1: Folder containing all the nine official English translations of the novels, a fantranslation of Gaiden and a pdf merging novels 1-7 (minus Dead Apple) fantranslated in Chinese. • Link 2: Official English translations of the first eight novels, avaible to read online. • Link 3: Fanmade audiobooks of the first seven novels officially translated in English.
Extra Light Novels
• Gakuen Bungo Stray Dogs (fantranslation (incomplete)) • Untitled Ikebukuro Flagship Animate Store Story (fantranslation) • Kunikida and Katai's Brilliant Days (fantranslation) • The Day I Picked Up Dazai: Side A, Side B (fantranslation)
Rakugaki Note Collection of bsd illustrations by Sango Harukawa, published in 2016
• Folder link
Anime Five season anime. Watch order is season 1 → season 2 → Hitori Ayumi (OVA) → DEAD APPLE (movie) → season 3 → season 4 → season 5
Streaming site 1 • Streaming site 2
Drama CDs Audio dramas recorded by the anime voice actors cast, released between 2015 and 2017. Some albums feature character songs.
• Drama CDs masterlist
Bungou Stray Radio Web radio for the anime hosted by Yuto Uemura (Atsushi’s va)
• Playlist (missing episode 17) (untranslated)
Welcome! To Uemura Detective Agency Anime vas show hosted by Yuto Uemura (Atsushi’s va) included in the first anime season blu-ray
• Playlist with all 12 episodes (untranslated) • Episode 5 highlights translation
Stage plays Eight stage plays that adapt different anime seasons and novels
• Folder link (mostly translated)
BEAST movie Direction by Kōichi Sakamoto, script by Kafka Asagiri. Movie adaptation of an alternative universe spin-off novel.
• Folder link
Official pages
• Kafka Asagiri's Twitter • Sango Harukawa’s Twitter • Sango Harukawa’s blog • Shiwasu Hoshikawa’s Twitter • Gun_Zi’s Twitter • Neco Kanai’s Twitter • Official manga Twitter account • Official anime Twitter account • Official Mayoi Twitter account • Official stage plays Twitter account • Official Beast movie Twitter account • Official exhibition Twitter account • Official Gakuen Twitter account • Official Wan! serialization site • Official Gaiden serialization site • Official DEAD APPLE serialization site
Other resources
• BSD wiki • Mayoi wiki • BSD-bibliophile • BSD updates countdown • BSD calendar • Interviews masterlist • Magazines Archive • Archive of official art • Megathread of art by Harukawa • Megathread of anime art • Merch archive 1 • Merch archive 2 • Official art scans • Website for manga volume raws, dvd ripoff, op/ed albums and basically everything • @/akutagawaprize, Tumblr archive of official content through 2015-2020 • @/popopretty’s blog for misc translations • Guidebook Gongeroku scans • Masterpost of literature works referenced in the bsd franchise • BSD Honorifics and Nicknames • Every Piece of Information Involving the Book • BSD anime irl locations tour
If you found this list useful, could you consider contributing to the archive? Things it would be nice to add include:
• Good quality scans (>1350px) of the 20th volume of the manga (Sorry. Once again, personal request.) • Wan! official English translations (minus volumes 1-4) • Retrieve the missing short drama Return of the Detective's Good Mood • English subtitles for the remaining stage plays (BSD on Stage & Fifteen) • Better quality versions of the stage plays in general (especially Fifteen) • Translations of the remaining Anthology chapters (please check the masterlist above, I ran out of links per post) • Translations of untranslated magazines interviews (check out the megazines archive spreadsheet to see what has and hasn't been translated so far) • Anthology 6 raws • Anthology 1 official English translation • Scans of any of the Guidebooks (except for Gongeroku) / Genga Collections / Illustration books
If you think something should be added to this list, please do not hesitate to reach out!
LAST UPDATED: 25/10/24
#Am probably forgetting about something but eh this should suffice for now#Please let me know if you think of anything I should add!!!#bsd#bungou stray dogs#bsd masterpost#mine#my masterlist#If anyone notices any typo can you please hmu? I wrote this from computer so I didn't have the keyboard outocorrector :p#people asks me stuff#And when the time has come for me to abandon this earth (leave the bsd fandom)#remember me for having fought the strongest war (trying to catalogue the bsd content)#as your weakest soldier (a ss/kk shipper in a s/kk world)
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I've just been staring at my my copy of Vol. 20 that came in the mail today with the page open on *The* panel.
This is how I cope.
Every Akutagawa fan right now
#That sounds like the perfect coping mechanism have fun 👍👍#ryūnosuke akutagawa#bsd#bungou stray dogs#bsd s5#bsd season 5#The grip this pathetic man has on everyone is insane#I've been making fun of him since I first stepped into the fandom and look at me now#That's a perfect timing for receiving the mail though!!!#Funny coincidence my physical copy of Rakugaki Note also arrived exactly as I was watching the episode :D#people asks me stuff
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Felt a bit nostalgic watching RT shut down…Here are the og faves again for old times sake 💙
#rvb#agent washington#agent Carolina#lavernius tucker#michael j caboose#epsilon#my art rvb#ahhh a lot of feelings…of course I stepped away from rt as a company a long time ago#but RvB is special to me!! it was my first fandom experience ever#and the community here on tumblr specifically was so instrumental to me growing up#I really could not have asked for a better community of artists and writers to grow up in. I know it sounds like platitudes when I say#that everyone was super nice and talented but REALLY. People were so kind to me and somehow I became well known despite#my art and writing and me in general still being immature and hashtag cringe#I found my creative legs and#people would respond to my stuff with walls and walls of support in the tags and we would do exchanges and events every year#I made my first lyric comic and it’s still doing extremely well on YouTube even today!! my dad who passed away recently always loved it#and my favorite RvB writer came out of hibernation to write me a bunch of text wall asks about it#I’ve never had another fandom experience quite like RvB#I still keep in touch with many of my friends from that time period even though we’ve all moved on the other things#these guys will always always have a place in my heart#so long reds and blues….
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IT'S A MIRACLE OF MODERN DAY SCIENCE!
there are some things biology didn't account for and i think medic would take it upon himself to find out what. i have an entrance exam coming up n i needed medic's dog teeth for moral support ok? ok.
#tf2#team fortress 2#tf2 medic#medic tf2#illustration#digital art#artists on tumblr#vintage#mine#my art#ask 2 tag#i know people have teeth stuff so pls lemme know if u want this tagged#I HATE HIM#I HOPE HE DIES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! BADLY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!#medic#giggglignggg#kicking my feet twirling my hair#this one is for ME#ME!!!!!
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it's my birthdayyyy
hello!! oh well i got older and now i'm 28. just wanna drop some of my works here again for a please-share-my-stuff post, cuz some attention for what i do would be the best gift. i work as a director and art director (i also do character design, backgrounds, storyboards, color and animation keys, voice actors direction and tons of other stuff). when i have some free time i do mostly paleoart (pterosaurs my beloved), sometimes fanart if i feel a bit crazy. and that's exactly what i posts here so feel free to say hi! :D thank u and i hope you all are safe<3
#i remember some people telling me that my job feels kinda intimidating but i dont bite i promise#i'm chill and silly especially irl#feel free to say stuff or ask anything!!#mwah#barghest barks#art#artists on tumblr#paleoart#fanart#rdr2 fanart#bg3 fanart
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thinking about not only the specific people lucanis pulls in to represent the 'locks' in his psyche, but the storytelling that happens in the structure/order of them. the underlying ideas are presented something like:
the lucanis who went into the ossuary never came back out again; he died down there (the boy caterina raised is gone forever) -> you're putting yourself in danger doing this (by being close to me), you should leave because I can't bear it if you get hurt because of me -> it doesn't matter even if we do try this, it won't work anyway (again because of me) ('you know what he's like, you can open the door but he won't walk through it' :'( oofie doofie) -> what if the real secret is that there was never anything but the monster in here from the beginning. you should leave, there was never anything here worth saving in the first place. (implicitly: what if I deserved what happened, all along.)
it runs pretty cleanly from outward-oriented attachment anxiety ('caterina won't even want me back like this, she won't recognize me (the same way I no longer recognize myself)) and gradually deeper inwards until we reach self-image and self worth. or you know, the harrowing basic lack of it lol.
"careful -- they'll know we're not right," spite says in one of their first scenes... but clearly, some very deep part of lucanis has feared or suspected for much longer than that that there's something inherently not right at the core of him, way before any demon entered the picture. and the voice he gives those lines to is the person who should know him better than anyone in the world, who he has loved more than anyone in the world -- and who deliberately chose to hurt him so horrifically anyway. 'It's better if I'm just a monster and deserved what happened than it is to allow for the idea that the brother I love doesn't really exist and maybe never did'. it's better if he's fundamentally flawed in some way that needed fixing to help him survive, and that's why caterina chose to hurt him again and again -- out of love. (this one I think he might have a very sad wakeup call on one day if he ever ends up with the responsibility and care of a child of his own in some way and realizes just how alien the idea of ever intentionally hurting them for any reason is to him. oh buddy. also interesting that he keeps caterina as the outermost lock -- there IS a distance he keeps there that he hasn't with illario. he doesn't resent her 'anymore' he says, but he also keeps her carefully further away from his deepest self.)
as far as I could tell the only note in the mind prison that's fully hidden and needs to be uncovered is the sad painful helpless stupid little truth that even after all this, even knowing what happened... he still loves his brother. is there anything illario could ever do that would make lucanis completely stop loving him, do you think? sometimes the trouble with unconditional love is that it is, well. unconditional, even when some terms and conditions probably would have been in order haha.
that's the pattern you see there again and again; he would rather destroy and abandon and imprison himself at every turn than let go of love, even when it's just scraps, even when there's only ever enough of it to hurt him. it's only when rook shows up and as it were takes his hand and walks along with him that he can entertain the idea of changing the story of what walking out the door might mean in the end.
#tl;dr the demon is a metaphor about dissociation and trauma and it's doing its job thematically fucking pitch perfectly that way the end#dragon age#dragon age: the veilguard#dragon age: the veilguard spoilers#dragon age spoilers#lucanis dellamorte#dragon age meta#this mission is like ds9 the wire in terms of episodes you really can examine from a thousand different angles#and find something new and soulcrushingly sad every time. exactly my kind of episode in other words#whenever people say there's nothing to him but coffee and spite jokes some small part of me goes 'oh I'm so incredibly sorry!#it must be really hard and so impractical to go through life without being able to read :'( get better soon'#is that very nice of me. perhaps not. is the writing here *perfect*? of course not. but some people are also dedicated to being#wilfully blind (presumably b/c they would have preferred to see something else?? idk man)#lucanis' reaction to taash going 'I'm sorry I'm such a bad crow :'('... he could NEVER do what caterina did with him no matter what#you just can't use him like that. he needs the clean family/enemy/contract distinction or you just break him!!!#caterina literally what are you thinking. every day I ask myself this. (probably 'the only other option that keeps the seat in the family#is illario. so that's right out of course' lmao)#god forbid it happen anytime soon if it should happen b/c there's Stuff that needs working through first lol but he'd be such a soft dad
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Who do you hc as older for the twins (if you haven’t said already sorry)
Okay, so I headcannon Leo as older just because I think Donnie would end up being taller than him when they grow up and I think it's funny when the older sibling ends up being shorter (happened to me 😔)
I don’t think it would have any effect on their dynamic at all because they would never actually know who’s older when they are growing up and the age difference would probably be around a few months but small enough to be insignificant.
I don't really like having any sort of older sibling younger sibling dynamic between them because they're the twins! They're both equally protective and annoying to each other.
But yea, me personally, I like to think Leo's older, and if somehow they ever did find out, I dont think it would change their relationship other than Leo just teasing Donnie about it a lot.
#obviusly this is no shade to people who do like having that dynamic btwn them ive read good fics and stuff like that#just me personally i dont like representing them that way#asks#yapping
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