#i am on the spectrum i fear
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sulfvr · 2 months ago
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Bastard stupid ugly-ass unloved experimental idiot failed abortion curbchewer little shit child (affectionate) fanart
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so uhh here's my art of this dumb little disgusting thing that has bore it's way through my skull and made a nest in my brain. @asmogorna thank you for making this little dirt child that won't leave my frontal lobe whatever I do (I love him so much oh my goddd oh my goddd oh mygoddddd)
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jensensitive · 4 months ago
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the thing is i actually think that soldier boy hooking up with a guy would flip a switch in sooo many straight men's minds
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lgbtlunaverse · 1 year ago
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I know everyone here loves a good "A is injured and/or killed and their partner B absolutely loses it and puts the fear of god into everyone around them" as well as unhealthy devotion to the point of love superceding both self preservation and morality. They're classics for a reason. And I think it's fun that in mdzs basically every single one of the examples for either of these have not been romantic (I think lwj would be up for some wei wuxian-motivated murder if you put him in the right situation but the most he ever did in canon was injure some of his elders, and while intense his grief is mostly silent rather than explosive) but familial. All of the big revenge plans and post death/injury deadly freak-outs have been about family. Wei wuxian (and, honestly, Jiang Cheng) for Jiang Yanli. Wen qing and Wei Wuxian (again) for Wen Ning. Jin Guangyao for his mother. And, of course, the whole fucking plot is set in motion by Nie Huaisang going "I don't give a fuck who it sacrifices in the process i will get revenge for my brother's death" for Nie Mingjue.
It really is "unhealthy codependent family dynamics: the novel." I like it.
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hypodermicfroggy · 5 months ago
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...I know I'm "just" aromantic, but sometimes I really wish I could come out to my mother and it does make me sad I'll never be able to.
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clockworkreapers · 1 year ago
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How long have these OCs been around? Did they exist before the 2020 comic or did it pop into your mind just then???
Oh no they were made LONG before I even had the idea of making a fan adventure, honestly I don't even think I knew fan adventures existed when I made them. The main 6 were made (as far as I know it's hard to place when I didn’t date any of my old old sketchbooks) when I was 13 so they are a decade old now. The first image I posted here that had any of them was in 2016 so I would have been 16 then. In 8th grade though I remember actually getting into fantrolls cuz I made a lil mache statue of the first version of Dextra (the weird sona with the purple hair and clock horns) in my art class and I remember drawing her with the very first versions of my characters at some point during that time. Now I know the main 6 came a few months before her and in the OG sketchbook that lines up cuz her first version appeared like 20 pages after they did. I was 12/13 in 8th grade so that's like the only way I can really “pinpoint” when they were made really. I do still have the sketchbook I first drew them in as well I just don't have it dated cuz what 12/13 year old remembers to date their sketchbooks lol 
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There's something fun for you, those are all the first drawings I could find of each of them VS the ones I did in senior year of collage with their fancy godtiers, vast amount of development and improvement over a decade.
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brittlebutch · 1 year ago
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one thing i do love about Brennan's storytelling is how often he creates characters who carry Anger with them. like, it's not an anger that subsumes or permeates who they are, nor does it tend to Remain throughout the entirety of their arcs, but it's there, in Zelda, and Hob, and Evan, and Ayda, and Nikhil, and so on. Characters who snap and snarl and growl and shout, and - and this is Key - are never like, reprimanded, or corrected, or resented for it. i cannot express how much this means to me
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moe-broey · 1 year ago
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LIKE........ @ the prev post about armor flexibility.... Is That Why They Look Like That??????? 👁️👁️
Something else fascinating I found actually when I was comparing the Askr trio (knowing Alfonse and Sharena largely match, just a few differences here and there), wanting to get a better look at Anna...
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SHE HAS BIG ASS BOOTS?!????? I. COMPLETELY FORGOR ....... it gives her a real sturdy look though. Hm.... (Thinking about what this means for characterization/how I'd draw her, esp w my initial impressions kind of. Being the opposite of this LMFAOOO oops 😥)
#feh#art ref#also something funny is actually looking directly at the official art for alfonse and sharena#and seeing that they do differ in little ways like that (didn't include the full boots cause i wanted to focus on the shoes)#i just. made simplified designs of them. made them twinnies. and never looked back LMFAOOOOO#and really it does go back to that OLD old gravity falls art i did where i completely redesigned their outfits#bc i think i was still somewhat new at drawing them and bc it was a whole comic i. couldn't draw the armor. That Much.#and in that design i gave them over the knee stockings. and that just stuck. in no way do either of them have that#in canon SHKSHDKSJSK (MAYBE w how alfonse's clothes are layered. that little bunched up cloth at the knees.#but even then that's still white fabric. whereas i like giving them both red socks. extrapolating from#sharena's boot/thigh window design i really couldn't make heads or tails of back in the day LMFAOOO)#also i will say. it is an extremely funny experience to have fe as a special interest. and to have history be one of my worst subjects.#i know jack shit and fuck all. on a surface level typically i would have little interest in this sort of thing. i love these guys though!!!!#and bc i love these guys and bc i'm an artist. i am studying the most oddly specific shit you wouldn't fucking believe#from clothing (a keen interest of mine actually) to infrastructure (i hate this.) to weapons (v superficial i just think its neat!)#to. horses. even. (i respect horses as beautiful and large creatures but i'm convinced they sense fear and i don't want#to fuck everything up bc this beast is like three times my size and i am. a little nervous. cool beast though!)#what being on the autism spectrum does to a motherfucker.#fe alfonse#sharena#fe anna
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clowningcrows · 5 days ago
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i fear i cannot mentally or emotionally handle being conscious much longer so im gonna take a melatonin and hope to god it works enough to make me pass out by 8:30 tbh
#i. have gone through the full spectrum of human emotions today methinks (not including joy or happiness or any of the like.. naturally)#i am so exhausted and feeling deeply deeply fucking hopeless#ive spent so much of my life feeling miserable and hopeless but holy fucking shit none of that even remotely came close to the amount#of sheer hopelessness and despair that im feeling today#gneuinely. at a loss for ways to make myself or anyone else feel better#like. well at least we're alive! bitch i dont think i want to be anymore. and furthermore for a LOT of people NOT FOR MUCH LONGER probably#at least we have friends/family/community! yes and that means i have that many more people to be absolutely terrified for on top of myself#we've been through this once we can do it again! I WANT MY LIFE TO BE ABOUT MORE THAN JUST GETTING THROUGH#JESUS CHRIST LIKE#by the time the next election comes i will be 27#meaning i will have spent the majority of my teens AND 20s fearing this stupid fucking man and his stupid fucking morally bankrupt follower#im so sick#im so tired#i have to stay alive but for what??? for climate change to make everything exponentially worse in the next 10-15 years??#for society and humanity as we know it to AT the very LEAST begin to collapse in front of my very eyes??#anyway.#like... i just...#thank god i have ppl in my life rn who care about me bc they are essentially singlehandedly keeping me alive at this point#at the end of all of it even though i can do this song and dance all day and be like "whats the point of living? why shouldnt i k myself#and the answer is that the people i love would be sad. the people i love love me too and they would never be the same.#and especially with how much a lot of them have done for me. i owe it to them to at least Try to give myself the best shot i can#us politics#election 2024#kamala harris#2024 election#uspol
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possum-quesadilla · 4 months ago
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I just saw Longlegs twice in 24 hours. Am crocheting a sandworm. Received my MatPat retirement figurine in the mail today. Staring longingly at my framed mini painting of Venom.
I think there may be things wrong with me aside from The Obvious
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rawliverandgoronspice · 6 months ago
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One thing I really like is that the whole Unhallowed Vespers trilogy (so Litany, Descant and Antiphon) is that is really served as my brainstorming test grounds for Thralls.
There are ideas in there I realize I don't like as much as I thought in hindsight, or conflict with other stuff I decided I'd rather pursue instead, and I get to have explored them before committing to those in a more long-form kind of project --or some that are too subtle or complicated to be carried out outside of writing (mostly thinking of a ton of Ganondorf character details, some things about gerudo culture that I want to tweak, characters that are getting axed because We Don't Have Time, etc).
On the contrary, there are things I set up in there I never actually got to explore, and I get to pull out that thread in here instead (basically every single of the hylians' character arc roughly, Nabooru, even Impa in a way). It's pretty weird and interesting to revisit the same core ideas twice, but in a different medium and with different character arcs in mind starting off the same thing.
#thoughts#thralls of power#animatic project#descant of greatness#litany of betrayal#antiphon#unhallowed vespers#ganondorf#impa#nabooru#thinking about that as I try to pick and choose what idea actually interests me about gerudo culture and especially its nuances#there are things I plan to do in Thralls that I much prefer#this new iteration of Ganondorf and Saeruk's relationship is soooo much more compelling to me for example#I think I didn't spend enough time unearthing Saeruk as her own character then with her own arc#but I still want to re-inject some of the ideas I had but with subtler worldbuilding this time#I just realized today I am still pretty attached to Ganondorf as somewhere on the aroace spectrum#and this being a very VERY subtle cause of conflict as to how he perceives his relation to belonging in gerudo culture#without having the society being as rigid and oppressive in gender roles as in Unhallowed Vespers#which can be done I think --and become more understated and alienating and heartbreaking in a way#because it is not as clearly stated as a pillar of expectation --but still slowly he still comes to realize he was never “a sister”#and what that does to him --and to the gerudos who both love him and fear/endure him all at once#at least that's my hope#Also. My dream of Serielle as an interesting piece of that even though she is a nightmare of a character to pull off right#I had two friends rereading two different versions of the outline#the first one thought her arc came out of nowhere#the second one perceived her as a one-note villain#and I want neither of those things!!! so!!!! where is the truth#we'll see#anyway
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lovebloods · 8 months ago
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#hiding this in the tags bc it’s kind of embarrassing and i need to get it off my chest#and i could journal about it but i just want someone to see me#sorry for being cringe <333#but i don’t know what the hell i am like i don’t know if i’m even nonbinary anymore and that scares me like being nonbinary felt like coming#home after a long trip#and now i’m having all these thoughts about wanting to be a man? like near tears rn bc i want to be a guy but then when i think of actually#being a guy i freak out a bit#bc i like being seen as feminine too and i know that there are feminine men and they get treated so terribly#and i feel like all the men i see that i want to be like or look like are white! why don’t i see any black trans men like i feel so alone#and i’m scared to look/be openly trans bc there’s so much violence against people like us that it feels safer to just cosplay as a cis woman#even though i’m not#like i don’t want to be a boy but i want to be one and i absolutely don’t want to be a girl but i’d like to be seen as someone sometimes#it’s all very confusing#AND like i know i’m biromantic like im attracted to all genders and people#but im like? am i on the ace spectrum#bc i have a low sex drive am often sex repulsed and will sometimes ‘test’#myself to see if im sexually attracted to people and most of the time it’s like#it’s like meh not really but sometimes im like sure but that’s rarer and rarer these days?? and like. tmi here but i jerk off and enjoy it#so i can’t be asexual right?? i tried looking it up but the articles just confused me#but then i also am like with the right person if i had a connection to them i wouldn’t mind having sex with them! but like. then i think#about actually having to be in a relationship and i’m like gross no but i think that’s just relationship trauma and fear of being#vulnerable#and like i know i don’t HAVE to have a label on my gender or sexuality but for me personally it helps to know What i am#and and i love butches so so so much and if i’m a man how can i love butches? like#it’s all so confusing#i feel like i’m 14 and going through puberty again
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agios-rio · 10 months ago
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What I've learned from my book of alien abduction cases so far*:
- aliens are keeping an eye on us because they want to figure out what went wrong with our development as a species
- because impending self-annihilation shouldn't be the way of things
- rather we should be finding ways to connect to each other, other species, and eventually other planes of existence
- they are trying to help us without intervening directly because they know we would lash out in fear
- they are amazed at our capacity for feelings. they don't feel as intense as we do (but they do feel the same things)
- and they love us. they love us a lot. they love us. they care about what happens to us because they love us.
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*Abduction by John E. Mack (who was the head of the department of psychiatry of fucking Harvard Medical School for 27 years and won a Pulitzer in his younger years. Make of that what you will.)
Look. Am I 100% convinced this is true? Nah. But it's a nice thought. If there are beings out there I'd rather they adored us. And being saved from the pickle we've manoeuvred ourselves into makes me way more hopeful than any alternatives. Because we sure as fuck ain't going to get ourselves out of this alone. And I like the idea of the universe running on love. So I'll just integrate all that into my belief system.
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brown-little-robin · 2 years ago
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I spent a wonderful day with family on Sunday, went to church, and drove through a terrifying thunderstorm late at night, and I feel like I'm a whole new person.
It's spring and it's perfectly warm and humid with a cool wind.
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sammydem0n64 · 1 year ago
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Tbh fellas my identity has reached a point of true “idgaf” (it has been like this for months actually. Lolz.) Thinking abt it gives me brainrot. Pronouns? Idc call me whatever. Gender? I am not a man that’s all I got. Sexuality? Idk. I don’t wanna date people tho!!!!!!!!! I don’t wanna find myself!!!!!!!!!!!! I am Aaliyah sammydem0n64 and I am autistic and that’s it‼️‼️‼️‼️
#could have a serious thing abt this but. ew#been on my mind for a while now and it’s 2 am so I get to have introspective rambles#labels r hard. sexuality and gender is a spectrum. I’ve never cared abt pronouns but they/she is easier#maybe there’s a fear that if I’m cis or something people won’t like me for having queer characters#maybe my peers won’t respect me anymore bc boooooooooo to non queer people yucky yucky#but also I don’t think. I’m cishet I don’t think so#but also I just don’t know and idk if I’ll ever know bc I guess I don’t know how!!!!!!#I’ve had 1 romantic relationship and even then we mutually broke up bc we realized we were just best friends#and got platonic relationships mixed up with romantic#and I haven’t wanted a relationship since lol#am I aro? idk. I find people attractive. I just don’t wanna date people rn and maybe that’ll change#am I a woman? idk. I like having boobs. I call myself a woman. but am I one? fuck if I know#like I said I’m just not a man. I’m not a man solely#I don’t identify as one and won’t bc I’m not that. but that’s the only solid#but idk if I’m non-binary. I’ve identified as that for so long that perhaps there’s a fear that I’ll be looked down on for ‘detransitioning’#i don’t know what I am. I’m just me. I go by any pronouns and I like a wide range of fictional characters over several genders#unlabeled for the win I guess but also being ‘unlabeled’ has inherented turned into a label. so#I’M JUST AALIYAH SAMMYDEM0N64‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️#I don’t think this is a vent I’m being silly with it + plus it’s introspection with mentioned fear. I’m just rambling#lol anyways 😋😋😋😋
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sibyl-of-space · 2 years ago
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an important part of being an artist is learning that every single other artist you will ever meet is somewhere else on the "cringe" to "normie" spectrum than you. and that every single other artist you will ever meet also has a different internal "cringe" to "normie" spectrum and they think YOU'RE the one in the wrong place. AND that your OWN "cringe" to "normie" spectrum, along with your place on it, will shift as you interact with more and different kinds of artists.
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thedeadtravelfast · 5 months ago
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@nightcrawler-fan @ferretfyre @jabberwocky1996
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for my birthday yesterday me and my friends went to a very high production haunted trail and i was so happy and gleeful that most of the actors did not try to scare me because i would see them and smile like i was seeing my favorite most beautiful puppy in the whole wide world
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