#how rude of my brain to do this to me
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imagine being so bereft of joy that you cannot stop yourself from leaving this comment on a benign "look at this fun fandom mug my spouse bought me, enjoy this funny personal anecdote to go with it" post

sorry for existing i guess???
#the hoops this person must have had to jump through to see my post#since i imagine they are one of the users whose main accounts i have blocked#did they create a burner account just for this purpose#do i take up that much real estate in their brain#how flattering#salty peak sect 🧂#edited to add these incidents make me laugh because i am so routinely called a fandom bully for#/checks my notes#politely but not timidly confronting people in the general tags when they tag their character hate#and matching the tone of the person i'm talking to if they decide to get cunty with me#look i'm sorry that you feel uncomfortable when someone tells you you're doing a rude and assholish thing#but that does not make the person who is confronting you into an asshole or a bully#someone being firm with you when you're making other people uncomfortable is not bullying#but literally all i have to do is exist in proximity to these pissbabies and suddenly they just cannot stop themselves#from regurgitating their feelings onto my posts#or vagueblogging about me and dropping it in the general fandom tags#like damn if i bother you that much then block me for god's sake
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her face body language and general demeanor in this scene make me feel such intensely sapphic emotions i want to bite off my own hand about it
#this scene lives in my brain RENT! FREE!#'nothing ever changes or gets better and i'm tired' name a sentence that summarizes her more succinctly i'll wait#the cigarette. her unfiltered disdain for hughie. the whole 'how /dare/ you ask more of me' of it all i'm gonna pass out#queen maeve#the boys#i love you maeve being incredibly rude and antagonistic to people for zero apparent reason. i love you maeve pulling no punches#this woman has done nothing wrong ever in her entire life your honor#the empty cig pack and the pill bottle on the table... the mood is so potent and it's mentally ill#i'm normal about her why do you ask
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Sobbing away all snotty at midnight because the stupid evil tech show made more tragic lesbians and I'm too emotional for this shit.
#man hotel reverie was such an incredible episode#and it's done something to my brain#I love black mirror a lot#but sometimes they hit me with a story all about human connection l#and how our experiences sometimes transcend time itself#and connect us so deeply across periods#that we never are truly too different from that which came before us#and frankly it's rude#I feel sick with emotion I hate it#I can't breathe properly already and now I'm extra full of snot#this was not the episode to watch while already sick#BUT I WASNT EXPECTING IY#I spotted the lesbian in the first 2 minutes#I WASNT EXPECTING THE REST OF IT#I THOUGHT BRANDY WAS GONNA STAY COOLER ABOUT ALL THIS#GIRL NOT THE TRAGIC ROMANCE#DONT DO IT#😭😭😭😭😭😭😭 HOW MUCH SNOT CAN A PERSON BE FILLED WITH????#THE ANSWER IS SO MUCH
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the thing my headache needs to understand is that i wanna do other things. i have literally drank water and taken my stupid silly meds and eaten a nourishment. cure yourself already????? please?????
#me@me#HATE HAVING RANDOM BURSTS OF ENERGY BUT BEING WEIGHED DOWN BY THE HEAD PAIN SIR I WANNA DO STUFF AND THE ENERGY IS LIMITED EDITION#you're literally my brain you should now how much of a Rare Event this is. can you go away pls.#can you not make me faint if i move more than a singular centimeter pls pls pls#im asking so nicely And politely and this is what i get#how rude#dispicable#hate it here!!#chewing at bars of enclosure!!! as usual!!!!!!!! i fucking guess!!!!#ew screen is evil light evil someone should've warned me about the lightbulbs man#maiora bla bla blas#gonna go lie down in the dark AGAIN bluhhhhhhh#would love to draw that'd be so fun why must the nausea insist on murdering me that's so mean#owchie.#hope someone else has a nice day this is a threat to you specifically <3
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You’re new to the Princess-Rescuing business, aren’t you? (P1 | P2 | P3) (Patreon)
#Doodles#SCII#The Captain#DAX#My brain presented me with a punchline and then stepped back to let me figure out how to get there#And then had the audacity to feel silly for making the path!#How rude#Lol#Well I did it anyway! And it was in fact silly but in a good and fun way! So there brain! Lol#It was admittedly a bit touch-and-go for a while - I love silliness so much! But it kept turning out in a way I wasn't satisfied with#And then I'd draw the next thing and be like ''No actually that's funny/cute'' and everything was fine - and then it'd repeat! Pfft#But I'm happy with it by the end so it's fine >:3c Trust the process!#Anyway - the the Actual Thing lol#Considering the various SCII/adjacent vibes lately it might not surprise you to hear that alt outfits have come back into my crosshairs#Cough cough Pirate Fic cough - but those aren't the only vibes! Make something similar but not the same! Why not fantasy!#It is a classic go-to lol#It was fun thinking how the Captain's uniform could be translated into a more Princely aesthetic haha#I didn't do the same for DAX but that's mostly 'cause I just wanted to put him in human clothes lol#Plus I'm sure you can imagine who else will feature :3c And they couldn't just match! Part of the comedy is appearance-based!#Which is part of why it's funny for DAX to answer in the first place haha ♪ That's no dragon!#The Captain always bursting onto the scene without thinking things over first haha - what were you expecting Captain!#Also hey rude don't look so relieved that DAX wasn't the princess! What if it was a test and he /was/ the princess!#He'd be in so much troubleeeee ♪ Well he still might be hehehe
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okay i need to know if anyone else has been devastated by a creature having different defining features in dungeon meshi than like childhood stories
bc i adore this series (i am showing So Much restraint not reading the manga and watching it with my family as it comes out) but the kelpie my beloved
her hooves were not backwards and its killing me (kelpies were the closest i got to being a horse girl as a kid)
the seaweed is very nice and accurate (i say this as if ive seen a kelpie (not the dog) in real life) relating to the stories where the kelpie is made of seaweed or the shifter stories where it becomes a handsome young man with an unsettling amount of seaweed or sand in his hair
and the tail is a very cool nod towards it being a sea (limnistic? is that a word? relating to rivers and lakes) creature but the defining traits are that shes got backwards hooves and shes probably sticky when you pat her
like ik itd probably be hard to animate backwards hooves but aaaaa (expression of misapplied and disproportionate injustice and disappointment)


look at how fancy they are (((right picture from ben-the-hyena here on tumblr they did a whole series of drawings of mythological horses as carousels and its so pretty))) (image on the left is described as a nykur which to my knowledge is a similar icelandic water spirit )
((also vaguely disappointed she didnt try to get the others on her back to show off her cool elongation abilities for maximum snack collection but thats not the point i was trying to focus on here))
#dungeon meshi#dunmeshi#please i wanna yell but no one i care about cares about this show the same way i do#and especially not about the kelpie#sorry also for the wall of text#but literally if you google search “backwards hooves” the first thing that pops up is how its a defining trait of kelpies#how do i get people to see this so theyll talk to me#kelpie#delicious in dungeon#<< wild who calls it that#anne the kelpie#< not a tag anyone will use but its fine we're fine#i could tag characters but that feels rude#this isnt about them#maybe senshi bc they were fishing buddies#oh well#at least the thoughts should be sufficiently out of my brain now
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Have you posted any other writings online before? Hungry for more PMD angst :)
I haven't, actually! This is the first time I've ever put any of my writing out into the public, other than a brief (and very unsuccessful) venture into posting original fiction on Wattpad. You can imagine my shock and awe at discovering such a lovely audience upon migrating to Tumblr and fanfic.
I've been fighting hard to cook up some oneshots as a way to keep myself writing now that TPiaG's all through with the editing process, but I'm having a bit of a creative funk when it comes to generating with ideas. I've only managed to write a single Ark/Twig oneshot that features light angst towards the middle and end, but it's not really the focus of the fic, and I also have yet to upload it anywhere. It's still a bit nerve-wracking for me to post anything featuring an OC x Canon ship, hehe ^^;
If anyone has any scenes or anything they'd like to see written (or drawn--- comics are also a medium I work in, y'know), I'm all ears! Put 'em in the replies, reblogs, messages--- anything! I'd love to see what bonus scenes people would like to read :> Plus, it'd help circumvent my struggle to come up with what sorts of scenarios to stick the cast in!
#Y'all I'm begging you#I am foaming at the mouth with the need to write more PMD stuff#my hands are itching to tap away at a keyboard#my very soul is vibrating with readiness#and yet#this TRAITOROUS BRAIN of mine refuses to come up with any ideas#How rude of it >:(#If you have an idea and think it's dumb#you can still send it as an anonymous ask!!!!#I am begging you!!#do not starve me!!!#GIMME THE IDEAS. GIMME THEM.#sofie answers asks#pmd fanfic#pmd fanfiction#pmd fic
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it's not like i want my entire ats liveblog to be just. me bemoaning missed opportunities with gunn unfortunately the writers do give me a lot of ammo there. anyway I do think ats missed a trick in not giving gunn and connor a stronger dynamic. firstly because I'm sorry do you expect me to believe gunn would see this kid who's been fighting monsters his whole life, who learned to be tough and to never show fear because he was constantly in danger and never had anyone looking out for him, who lost the only family he had left to (he believed) a vampire, you expect me to believe gunn would look at him and not see his own younger self reflected back? he wouldn't see the 17 year old who sold his soul for a truck because he didn't think he had a future worth keeping it for? and secondly I don't think it's ever established when gunn and alonna lost their parents but it seems pretty strongly implied he was raising her from a very young age, which makes him the only person in angel investigations with any experience acting in some kind of parental role to a teenager. once again I am mourning for what we could have had if the writers contemplated giving gunn something interesting to do more than once per season and also remembered the existence of his dead sister after his first five episodes in the show
#buffyverse#angel the series#ifer's ats rewatch#ifer rambles#i feel like i'm losing my mind every time gunn interacts with connor in deep down my brain starts screaming HE WOULD NOT FUCKING SAY THAT#guys come on. you expect me to believe he would be confused about why connor is being rude and not doing what he's told#guys he raised his sister he knows how teenagers work#gunn. connor. i can save you i can save both of you from this season
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just started watching disventure camp today (finally) and I’m already on ep 6. I have (out loud) made the “you a baby quit cussing” joke like. Every single episode at least once. I have SO MUCH to talk about..
more in tags..like spoilers and stuff..
#disventure camp#spoilers..#i love love love lill. idk that much about her and it’s honestly kind of suspicious she’s not appreciated more like.#what did she do. did she do something malicious??? is that why I don’t ever see posts abt her??#also I have mixed feelings on fiore. Bc on one hand I love evil characters BUT. She got my girls (lill and ashley) out.#I miss them so much.#how dare you fiore. whyd you do that to them#also love the dynamic between gabby and Ellie. love them separately as well.#ellie only voting with fiore bc it gets her further in the game. real.#gabby having trouble trusting people on BOTH TEAMS#bc her first team voted her off and her second team betrayed her#also. love drew he shouldve been there longer. grett whyd you do that to him..#SPEAKING OF GRETT. she’s so complicated I have mixed feelings on her as well. Bc on one hand.#She’s very manipulative and is so so rude to gabby but on the other hand#It’s clear that she doesn’t get much attention prior to the show and she likely wants to win the million to finally impress her mother#also I’m not kidding when I say the bond between miriam and Jake in ep 5 made me cry. I was in SHOCK. how could u do this to me..#Also found it really funny how in ep 5 all of them got devastating phone calls and Dan was just standing there like “:)”#There’s not a thought in that head. There’s not a brain behind those eyes.
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i think a lot of people irl think i might be a lesbian just because i am so picky about men. cause most of the time im like eh he’s okay. oh he’s not my type. no i dont think that guy is hot. so they just assume i dont like men at all. which is. fair
#like if you asked me if i think a girl is pretty it doesn’t matter who it is or what they look like im going to say yes because women omg#women..wow#but if you asked me i think a boy is cute there is a 80/20 chance i say no. and a 50/50 i say#actually i think he’s really ugly#..i feel like i need to add a disclaimer even tho i know no one cares#but im not trying to imply that like. how ‘attractive’ someone dictates their value as a person#like if i call someone ugly it isn’t necessarily an insult in my mind i just don’t think they’re attractive#but someone else probably does! and that’s great! i don’t!#sometimes i get myself in trouble talking like that…i don’t *mean* it as an insult it’s just a fact in my brain#like. the fact is i think this person is ugly. maybe they’re a wonderful person! great! other people probably fine them cute! but i don’t.#and that’s just objectively true information. i forget not everyone’s on the same train of thought as i am :’)#anyways. idk what point im trying to make.#oh. i also have my guard up around men a lot more than i do around women#i don’t go out of my way to be rude but i’m more likely to get myself out of talking g to a man#than i am to a woman. not that anyone does talk to me#but if a girl compliments me im like wow! i feel so special and wonderful uwu#if a boy compliments me im like….the fuck do you want from me#ppl see this and are like wow she must just not like boys#idk#snow.txt
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saw a post on here about making friends as an adult and i feel conflicted cuz like, overall i agree that all you have to do is get the courage to show up and get the ball rolling by talking to people/getting their numbers even if it feels cringe or 'wrong' to do so however i can't help but raise my eyebrow at the 'act like they're already your friend' part because some people lean way to into that to the point where they forget we're not actually friends yet which inevitably leads to them saying/doing something that's pretty out of line so like. yes put yourself out there, talk to them and get to know them but please remember that people need to actually like, warm up to each other which could take weeks of speaking to them regularly at minimum
#like. idk maybe i'm getting hung up on semantics#but if someone i barely know calls me their friend or bestie or w/e off the rip it just makes me want to keep a distance from them#bc i don't trust their intentions#i'm kind of an extreme case bc my brain is wired in a way that it takes me like. a year for me to comfortably call someone a friend#but even then i recognize i'm an extreme case and ive warmed up to people in less time than that so it just Depends on the person/situation#thinking about how someone early this year randomly dm'd me asking for help on something and when i said 'yeah sure'#they started going on about how i'm great friend for always helping people out amongst other random positive things which made me go ???#bc i never spoken to them or hung out with them so i had no idea what their basis was for saying that. so their words came off as fake#like they were trying to use flattery to get on my good side or something#externally i was cordial n saying 'thanks' but internally i was like: ?? who are you? why are you talking to me like that?#i've had diff ppl do this to me later on in the year and it never not creeps me out#similar vein ppl i don't know will do that thing where theyre rude in a 'friend way'but it doesn't creep me out so much as it pisses me off#and 9/10 these people always turn out to be not good people to be around so#yap fest over thanks for reading if you got this far.#ik i went on a tangent for a bit but reminder that i think the general advice of putting urself out there is good#i just think people lean too into the over-familiarity sometimes and need to remember to slow down a lil bit#bc before you're close friends with anyone you're still strangers/acquaintances with them first#strike.txt
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food I did not like until this trip introduced me to them in new and interesting ways
Eggs
Almonds
#I have had so much egg recently you would not believe how many eggs I’ve eaten.#me when the menu has an egg: don’t mind if I do#as for almonds idk what it is about this specific bag of almonds but it’s rewired something in my brain that’s for certain#I keep craving these almonds. Like it’ll be late at night and my roommate is asleep so it’d be rude of me#to start cracking open almonds#but my brain will just ……….. crave.#be like good God I need those Almonds#And I can never eat more than like four but it’ll still be like. I need those almonds.#Need my almond fix#clamtalk#food
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I cannot fathom the level of self importance some people must have to behave this way
#it’s more so selfishness lmao#idk I’m getting unnecessarily worked up about this but 6 months ago I kinda vanished off of everywhere and then I noticed she deleted some#messages#girl I would’ve responded later calm down gosh the messages aren’t going anywhere nor are they disappearing#dora daily#I think of all people who should be mad you’re the last one because tell me why you were so viscerally rude to me since the beginning and#played a massive part of the roaa situation by being complacent when oh ! I thought you’d side with your alleged best friend ME#girl you have no right to complain at all not to mention you take FOREVER when you have no excuse to reply back but when I’m struggling I#apparently have zero excuse ☠️ girl bye#not to mention the fact that when I was so frustrated with myself having these bad headaches and being so incapable of doing anything when#exams were so close all you had to say was what can I do#well bitch what could I have done when you were at hospital#I guarantee you I was the only one texting you 24:7 asking how you were#reassuring you that it’s okay to feel upset about being in the fucking hospital and you don’t need to have such toxic positivity all the tim#oh but when the other girl had freaking back pain from her period or something apparently that’s more of a concern#girl bye#not me who has chronic headaches and cannot even study and nothing sticking cause it’s that bad#oh but go ahead compare it to your chronic illnesss like yes it’s horrible and yes it impacts you a lot#but I don’t think it impacts your brain and memorisation capacity#not to mention how fucking jealous she is of everything like I can say oh god I was so stressed and girl she has not felt stress in her life#compared to what I go through yet she is jealous of the fact I can stress ? tf?#and when I say I almost passed out cause of exhaustion she doesn’t give a shit when I was being so serious#in truth I’ve come to realise nobody does seem to care at all lmao they all think I’m lying#why would I lie about that be so fucking fr rn#anyways this is why I simply don’t want to talk about my physical condition with anyone anymore because they’ll think I’m a liar anyways 🤷♀#not to mention the fact if you even knew me a little you’d understand that it’s so impossibly hard for me to feel comfortable enough to#complain to talk about me feeling sick or sad or whatever I only do it here cause no one follows me and no one will rlly see it at all#but even here I feel like my throat closes up and I can barely breathe when I do complain#so pls …#this one sided friendship thing is crazy cause girl how do I shake you off?
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the realization i just had that the weed i've been smoking might be the cause of all these anxious & paranoid thoughts which spiral into the existential dread that's been keeping me awake the last few days is truly devastating
#this is how I turn my brain off at night... it's a real betrayal for it to do the opposite to me like this 😔#not that I'm even sure that's what it is but like. I DID just starting using smth new recently so it seems likely#fuckin..... rude. honestly so rude.#━━ ˟ ⊰ ✰ ooc ⋮ don’t @ me.#tbd.#weed cw
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People have attention spans.....must be nice
#i fully zone out#and sometimes i kno im doing it#and i cant stop it#and there's this person talking at me#but fuck if I kno what their saying#my sister was talkin and then she fully said ur bored now arent u#and i had to say yh cus like i tried#i know this is rude but i cant help it#its not personal#i dont spend more than 2 mins on anything#not an app#a song#a sentence#its getting worse but its kinda funny#and if uve told me anything that shit is in the void 'ill remember in 3-5 working days'#idk how ive read nearly 300 books saying this but like i think its blocks out the thoughts thats why#characters shit is not my shit and thats why i need to read to survive#i will stop rambling eventually#but my brain wants to talk so.........#i am not speaking to anyone cus being annoying is apparently the worst thing to be so ive been told multiple times
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