#how does one even rate things
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Is it bad that I want to see more of that Were-Doc Au?
the people love mad scientist turned big wet dog
#back to the future#bttf fanart#bttf#marty mcfly#emmett brown#doc brown#have this silly little doodle while i cook up some silly big doodles in the meantime :]#aaaand i have just realized i missed a line where doc's other shoulder should be.#whatever. no one notices these things except me lmao#you're not the only one wanting more weredoc hahaha. looks at my 6 other weredoc asks. plus the several ideas i came up with myself.#at this rate doc will appear on this blog more dog than man#anyone who wants to take this au and run off is welcome to as well! maybe you can come up with some science jargon that makes more sense#right now the backstory is he had a bit of einstein's dna for ???? and then messed it up so badly he turned himself into a dog#how? no clue. not even he knows.#kit does an art#weredoc au#just realized this concept is like. the inverse of that au on ao3 where marty used to be a dog LMAOO#havent read it just glanced at it in passing but i think that's really funny
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so there's a reason my new job got back to me so quickly about my application and that's bc it's an absolute fucking shambles like actually perfect timing for me to decide to rewatch the bear bc i have never more felt like ive been thrown into a broke on-its-knees establishment trying to crawl its way up the ladder where i am somehow a godsend to them. my old job was crazy and shambolic in the sense that the industry is just Like That but this one?????? insanity. every 5 mins i am questioning what im doing with my life. ive already had a walk-in fridge moment
#so i explained before that there's 3 venues and on my very first shift they had me doing the restaurant venue for 2 hours#which was FINE like i was a bit cautious bc my manager is VERY stressed all the time and the place generally feels like it's falling apart#not the building itself just. the way it's run like it's just got new owners and the previous manager apparently#EMPTIED THE TILLS AND TRASHED THE PLACE like cost them THOUSANDS of pounds and on top of that#there was beef with the head chef and the new owners that meant he left and took the ENTIRE BACK OF HOUSE WITH HIM#THERE ARE NO KITCHEN STAFF ATM. I HAVE TO LIE AND TELL CUSTOMERS WE DONT HAVE FOOD ATM BC OF 'REFURBISHMENT'#WHEN IN ACTUALITY THE /RESTAURANT/ DOESNT HAVE CHEFS. DO YOU KNOW HOW CRAZY THAT IS#and then the front of house staff are very lacking aside maybe 2 people we're ALL NEW and all of them EXCEPT ME#LIKE LITERALLY JUST ME IM THE ONLY EXCEPTION. ALL OF THEM ARE UNTRAINED#so when i applied with bar training coffee training and very solid waitressing skills they genuinely treated me like a saviour#like i am FENDING off shifts tbh im in a v good position bc they need me too much to get shitty w me if i refuse hours but i can literally#have as many as i want bc they will just give me them. like they're obsessed w me im rota'd for over 60 hours this week#but anyway that very first shift after 2 hours in the restaurant i then walked to the mini golf venue on the OTHER SIDE OF TOWN#and my manager stayed for 30 MINUTES. IF THAT. and showed me around the place + how to close THEN LEFT ME THERE#FIRST DAY HE GAVE ME THE KEYS AND LEFT ME TO RUN AN ENTIRE VENUE. IT'S NOT SMALL EITHER IT'S A WHOLE BAR#AND I HAD TO CLOSE ON MY OWN TOO and ironically the shift itself went rlly well like it was so chill#it was kinda boring but honestly i kinda rated it it's v easy money and the close went perfectly nothing cropped up that i was unsure about#and then. AND THEN. i havent even ranted to my mutuals about this yet bc i was acc so horrified by it but i locked the front doors#and went to lock the gate AND THE KEY GOT STUCK IN THE LOCK. WOULD NOT COME OUT. HELLA VS KEYS ROUND 3927593#my mum even showed up and tried to help me wrestle this thing out i called my manager and he literally told me to just snap it#bc he'd rather a snapped key that NO ONE could get out than just leave it there overnight but bc of my recent house key moment#i was like AM I FUCK SNAPPING THIS KEY. WHY DOES THIS KEEP HAPPENING. so i had to just leave it and at the time#i was realllyyyyyyyyyy beating myself up but my manager is actually rlly nice he's just stretched v thin#and ive also had time to be like uhh actually they shouldnt have left a random 21 y/o girl alone with the keys on her first day#omg i havent even talked about what happened on saturday. ACTUAL SHAMBLES#LIKE THIS /\/\ ISNT EVEN CLOSE TO EVERYTHING! IM RUNNING OUT OF TAG ROOM! IM GONNA REBLOG THIS TONIGHT W MORE PROBABLY!#BC GUESS WHO IS WORKING A CLOSE LATER AT THE NIGHTCLUB THEN OPENING THE RESTAURANT AT 8AM. GUESS#hella slaves to capitalism
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Wouldn’t want him getting lost now, would we (Patreon)
#Doodles#SCII#ZEX#The Captain#DAX#Me quietly while watching Muppet Treasure Island: Don't | My brain: Haha anyway- ♪#I don't even have to reread! My brain just does this nonsense! It's still Right There at the forefront of my mind#At this rate I'll have to go pick up Treasure Island from the library *shakes fist* Stevensonnnnnnnnnnn#I will admit that the itch to reread has been growing but mmmmn I've got fics to vet for printing! And that one's technically unfinished!#I mean I might break soon lol but mmmmnnnnn!#Same thing when I was in a Treasure Planet mood years(?! how has it been that long and I still haven't rewatched!) ago#Anyway yes these were inspired by rewatching Muppet Treasure Island lol - it's just one interpretation after the other!#If you happen to go seeking out Professional Pirate you might recognize the second shot as when Jim has been kidnapped by the pirates#I kinda just interpolated from there lol#Same vibe as the set I made a while ago of ZEX piercing the Captain - there's just Something So about ZEX leaving a mark on him!#Not directly altering him (at least more than skin-deep haha) but decorating him! Dressing him up! There's Something about that#Like a living museum - how much does ZEX project onto the Captain? There's a lot of weird vibes around them <3#He wants A Human and he has His Human but hmmm ♪#Well for the time being that's his only human - and seeing as he's collared but without a leash in the last one he's not running away!#It's progress haha#Hhhh drawing the Captain in pirate garb really is one of my favourites <3 I had so much fun the first times around and it's still fun!#His hair is for some reason I cannot explain easier to draw in this setting - there is no explanation I can think of but it is! Why fight it#ZEX is also very fun to draw in pirate gear haha ♫ I really think it's one of his handsomest interpretations#I always think he's pretty! But something about the pirate aesthetic adds to his masculinity? :0#He's still a swishy pirate hehe ♥ Maybe it's the open chest on his tunic haha I just think he's very handsome!
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is there an actual medical reason why my body just doesn’t respond to medication and if there is please tell me it can be fixed bc this some bullshit
#ive tried easily over a dozen medications that just did absolutely nothing#and i mean no benefits no side effects even at increased dosages#all for different things like blood pressure heart rate salt increase contraception the works#then theres pain killers#talk about a waste of fucking time#ive tried at least 8 different pain killers that all have different bases and different things they fix#in the last five days ive tried four different meds#and theyve done absolutely nothing#one of which was a post surgery med my dad was prescribed and it literally just made me high for an hour and didnt touch my pain#how the hell does that happen#my ribs are so fucked#and its going into my stomach and hips bc of the way ive been holding myself to compensate for it#and i literally did nothing to trigger it#i know its muscle bc i used rapigel and it instantly went freezing cold#but i also had a long hot magnesium bath and used a topical muscle relaxer spray and none of it did shit#ive done heat ive done cold ive done sitting ive done laying down#im trying some endone we have left over tomorrow and if that does nothing then theres literally nothing else to do#theres nothing else#what the fuck am i supposed to do#coming out of my cage and ive been doing just fine.txt#spoonie#chronic pain#pots#postural orthostatic tachycardia syndrome#fibromyalgia#ehlers danlos syndrome#chronic illness
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still losing my mind at the way houses relationship with john would have fucked up the way he sees being an omega. just,,, teen house, young and confused, experiencing these absoloutely brutal heats. not understanding why they are so bad and hard when theyre supposed to be a time where an omega feels good. already feeling broken and wrong, and then having to face john's anger and disappointment over him being an omega
like i can only imagine how it would affect him in heat, a time where he would be less able to think coherently. and constantly remembering how traumatic and horrible his heats as a teen were, the memory making him feel bad and in turn making him feel physically worse. just like,,, a constant feedback loop of remembering and feeling bad -> feeling physically worse in turn -> reminding himself even more of his childhood and feeling worse
i feel like after having to deal with his first few heats without a strong family net to acclimate to the changes, once house is outta there and doing his own thing he tries to never deal with his heats alone. he marks his cycle religiously, makes deals with alphas in med school to help him through them, or even finds street suppressants if he's especially desperate.
man. you just know john has put him outside for some of his heats, too. nothing to nest with, no scent blocking patches, just left him in the yard like a sacrificial lamb. it goes without saying how dangerous that is.
hell, once he's employed i wouldn't be surprised if he stole something from the hospital to bring home in case a heat comes up that he can't deal with, something that'll knock him out for the worst of it.
#asks#certified-moth#house md#writing a fic that is basically just heat whump for a lot of it as i type this#house's heats are bad always it's just how it is for him#but once he has the infarction it's even worse#his leg becomes another focal point for pain to localize to and the scar is so severe that when he's in heat#it runs scary hot. like where the muscle is missing sits just a molten core of pure agony#fainting spells and delirium become new side effects as a result#it is a pathetic miserable sight and he WANTS to be alone so no one can see him like that#but dealing with them alone is torture so he just doesn't win. it fucks with his issues of self#something else to resent about his body#he and wilson develop a fairly solid unofficial........ thing early on in their friendship#it would have taken wilson more convincing had he not witnessed the effects himself and got his caretaker heart twanging#even when he's married. which doesn't necessarily mean he's cheating but uh. it doesn't help in his case#all of it compounds into a very big mess that does not help the success rates of his marriages#goes to show how much more time wilson spends with house than his wives when he's more synced with house than them#now THAT is an offense. THAT'S what can get feelings hurt#it makes him feel bad but he tries to reassure himself by comparing their heats to house's. they don't understand how bad it is#<- probably the cause of several arguments#wilson trying to get bonnie or julie to understand why he Needs to do this and bristling when they Just Don't Get It#“house didn't break up our marriage but he sure didn't help” etc#mgv
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just read a review of the lego movie from 2014 and it is genuinely a horrible piece of literature and through perusing the comments underneath the review, I have gained an intense dislike of the reviewer. it's not even that I liked the lego movie and he didn't it's just that a lot of the stuff he says is factually incorrect, really stupid-sounding, or he doesn't provide any real reason, and in the comments, he reacts to even the friendliest and politest constructive criticism as if it's a personal attack on him.
#listen I DON'T CARE THAT YOU DIDN'T LIKE THE MOVIE#I mean I'm slightly saddened because I did like it#but he straight-up says it's fully actual physical stop-motion animation at the beginning (factually incorrect)#then later says you won't appreciate the movie unless you like lego a lot and know all about it#specifically saying 'if you can tell the Lego Wild West town from its pirate ship from its spaceman set' (direct quote)#like um idk bro... are you saying you can't???#also this does insinuate that there is one specific set for each of these#which is also factually incorrect but I'm not really mad about that#and then in the comments he kept trying to defend himself by saying stuff about how the movie has a 90%ish rating on rotten tomatoes#and therefore 10% of people didn't like the movie#which is actually. an insane oversimplification of statistics. that's like saying if there are 10 children with an average of 4.5 apples#per child and each child can have a maximum of 5 apples#then 9 of the children must have 5 apples and the other 1 must have none#the 90% in fact includes a large number of people who rated it at 3.5-4.5 stars which is means a lot of them really actually did like it#and just didn't think it was the best movie ever ever in existence or maybe they just had some small qualm with it#the final straw was that someone left a very nice very kindly written piece of constructive criticism asking if maybe the reviewer would#consider saying what about the humor he didn't like (or what kind of humor it was) next time so that the viewer would know whether they#would like it or not as well and I read this and thought 'surely he will respond courteously to at least this one' and he said.#basically 'it's not that the kind of humor didn't suit my tastes. it just wasn't funny'#WHAT THE FREAK#WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT#ALL THIS GOING ON AND ON ABOUT WRITING A NEGATIVE REVIEW BECAUSE IT'S YOUR ACTUAL OPINION AND NOT BECAUSE YOU WANTED TO BE CONTRARY#BUT I THINK YOU DON'T KNOW WHAT AN OPINION IS??????#it's MY opinion that it was funny#it's YOUR opinion that it wasn't#you don't get to arbitrarily say that the only reason you disliked the humor was because it was 'bad'#even ethics aren't this black and white#there was another thread where a commenter pointed out that the reviewer seemed to assume there was such a thing as a universal definition#of a good movie and he repeatedly refused to explain himself. like in an 'are you stupid. this isn't worth my time' way#but I won't get into that
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i love not knowing if i'll ever be healthy again i love all of the time i've used to move my body become nothing i love spending my adulthood wasting away year after year for various reasons baby!
#i know i'm being dramatic and privileged etc etc right now but i hate living like this#i probably had covid in the beginning of august and since then my heart and lungs have just been fucked#so now i'm probably looking at at least 2 years of long covid and maybe permanent neurological damage#could i be lucky and get better in few more months? maybe. do i believe that will happen? no. optimistically maybe next summer id be better#my symptoms are not that bad considering what i know other people have suffered but at the same time that makes it feel not real#otherwise i'm pretty much fine except i feel like fainting alot after standing up or excerting myself and anything beyond walking#spikes my hr to 160 and right now even laying down my hr is around 80. this comes with the associated shortness of breath etc#what fucks me up about this is that my normal hr is low with my rhr being under 50bpm and i'm physically active#so basically i've went from regular running and half marathons being no issue to not being able to jog 1km at the slowest pace possible#without spiking my hr to zone 4#so now with the recovery time of this being however long if properly ever i'll have to basically start all over again with everything#i biked to the grocery store yesterday and that took me out for the rest of the day because my heart rate just didn't go down afterwards#outwards i look fine and i wouldn't be as affected if sports and moving wasn't a part of my life and relationships but it is#i've read studies about recovery times and a lot of them don't feel applicable because the test groups are either very different from me#based on the baseline health info such as activity levels or they're elite atheletes which i am not#some have given me hope that keeping my hr under like 130 by doing activities like walking until maybe someday things get better works#but who knows and even if it does this will be yet another thing that takes the littlest bits of muscle tissue i have on me away once again#because besides deconditioning muscle loss is yet another symptom. so i will be even weaker than i am right now#i don't know how much of what i'm experiencing in terms of mental effects is from anxiety over my physical health and how much is brainfog#but we'll see i'll just have to start walking a lot every day and keep up with simple and slow strenght training so i'll want to die less#i don't think my family will ever properly understand because almost all of them are athletes and the one who isn't never does any excercis#so either i just look like i'm weak but i was always weak so it's not a big deal or my experience isn't really that important#this is so so so pathetic both my reaction and the issue but it's difficult to not feel this way especially with the uncertainty#shit talking
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I snapped today at work, and by snapped I mean I politely commented on a help desk ticket by summing up an mess of an (type of) issue that's come up for at least the fourth time in the 2+ months I've been managing user accounts, and asked the person responsible to fix it (himself for once) because last time I fixed his mess-up it took me two whole days to work out the details with at least four other colleagues from different departments and I really don't want to do it again. there's other shit that needs doing, I've been working 10+ hour days for most of this week already, so I need to cut down not add on more.
(good thing tho - at least we managed to fix the issue where the dataset of a newer employee got mixed up with another one of the same name and therefore wasn't able to apply for any of the access/accounts she needed. technically not entirely my area but it does impact us not being allowed to create an account for her so I figured I might as well track that issue down. took three days and at least three other people, but hey - it should all work out now. yay for that)
#been feeling anxious af ever since bc it's the first time I've been this firm in a reply and idk how they'll take it#there's underlying issues in inter-departmental communication that need fixing that cause these issues to happen again and again#but my boss is on parental leave and his substitute is sick not that she cares or is up for doing her job where communication is concerned#so there's no real sense in addressing that rn esp by me who's only been there since June. but it does frustrate me a lot#anyway. I'm sure I'll get over this too. but yeah.. ppl not thinking things through for the two mins it takes to create an account#or the twenty seconds it takes to check if one already exists before creating a new one#or the minute it takes to check if folks still have an active contract past their time working in your department before deleting an accoun#just jfc. put in a smidge of effort and five mins total and save the rest of us from spending half a day to fix your mistake#oh well. if I get a pissy response I'll just blame it on being new as an intern and being too motivated and idealistic I guess#god forbid I expect people to do their jobs thoroughly or with at least a singular thought..#anyway. I feel like I'm allowed to be grumpy abt this since we are the folks who end up having to fix this shit#and by we I mean pretty much mostly me at this point bc one colleague is sick atm. my boss barely has time for this and is on leave#and my other colleague only works half time so I'm the one who's been handling most of these over the past month or so#which.. is still insane considering how I'm a goddamn intern who shouldn't even have admin rights tbh#but without them I couldn't do anything at all lol so here I am. nice that they trust and believe in me I suppose#that's why I try to do my best. (who am I kidding that's always the case anyway)#but yeah. definitely a 50% staff support job and only 50% of the other important things that need doing rn it's more like 90/10#and it's funny how I still dread my two hours of hotline. but every time the line is too busy I still jump in#we are also only 6 people atm out of 10 and three of us are still in training. and one of the trained folks had to come back in mid time of#next week we'll likely be 4#depending on if our substitute boss lady is back.. not that I'd look forward to it. she's a mess and she's been horrible to deal with latel#sure. she's stressed. but she's either snapping at me when I ask abt shit I can't know yet or she's ignoring me. great basis for team work.#so honestly I'd rather she not return on Monday. esp not if she's gonna spread her germs everywhere#but now sleep. sorry for the rant. it's certainly been quite the month since I returned from my own wisdom tooth rated sick leave..#gotta be up again in 6.5 hrs so I can be at work at 6 to let the electrician in. I'm gonna sleep so hard over the weekend I stg#a day in the life of..
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myah
my paimon age headcanon* is that she is like dave from kipo. she's technically a super old immortal** but also she Is a kid***. i was originally framing it as a phoenix sort of situation but dave from kipo has the same vibes plus like. being a person and not an animal and also being the same person (which, if i likened paimon to a vidyahara a la hsr, would not really be the case) *i flip flop between a few headcanons, namely the seelie one and this sort of phoenixy one. i really like paimon i have so many thoughts about her shes so interesting and sweet and ridiculous **i think the reason her memories are so inconsistent could be erosion at play. sometimes she can remember things and sometimes she is actually a really helpful guide but mostly she doesn't know what is going on and what she can remember seems so random. i also think theres some paimon lore in the wrio story quest so im actually gonna play that one just. not until the finals are done beating me up. so maybe this is all disproven there and i can stop flipflopping ***her interactions with other child characters (klee, diona, qiqi are the big three for this point) are definitely mentorly but in a fellow child sort of manner. she treats them like younger siblings typically. adult characters (albedo is the one i remember the best) often think of her as a child and she hasn't really objected to that, that i've noticed? she gets cranky about being called a pet, or food, or a toy (but still plays along sometimes because being in disguise etc etc, but she is noticeably unenthused about those labels) but i haven't really noticed her get upset about being called a kid. however, she is noticeably more helpful and more advanced than the littler child models. she seems to be similar to nahida (and they get along really well)(i really liked the paimon nahida interactions it always feels like paimon is trying to fit in with adults or babysitting kids but with nahida it felt like they matched better. despite nahida being well,,, a lot smarter). i think nahida is also a technically immortal but also kid sort of situation, but not in the same way as paimon is. nahida reminded me a lot of the aranara, with her reincarnation looking the same yet being someone else, with all the stuff about dreams, etc.. also the aranara are childlike and only knowable to children (and certain people with special circumstances) so . yeah. i think nahida is permanently in that kid but not state and paimon is currently in that kid but not state but i do kind of think paimon hasn't always been a kid, maybe possibly. i do definitely think shes existed for way longer than twenty years. but also shes kiddo.
anyway i love paimon. shes my son. id feel kinda bad for paimon haters cus she is in Every Single Thing except that like if u hate paimon why are u playing the paimon game? just to gamble???
#beeep#i also think klee is yet another genre of immortal baby. but still different. i think shes like 50 or something in a baby yoda sort of way#well maybe not precisely 50 and shes farther along than the baby yoda i think????? idk much about starwars. but like that sort of thing.#she ages but she does it reallyyyy slowly. and then qiqi doesnt age bc shes a zombie so shes yet ANOTHER type of immortal baby#but like. a human baby that became immortal. and well by baby i probably mean likeeee idk 8? 10? not Infant yknow#oh but also. also too. i think my klee headcanon paired with my diona headcanon can be a lil silly funny. or maybe sad#okay actually yea its a lil sad#i think diona ages at the normal human rate and maybe met klee earlier but now shes developmentally a bit older than klee...... and shell#probably be an adult and klee is still a kid.....#one cool thing about genshin is how the kids are actually like. interesting. admittedly i get more invested in kids storylines than other#ppl i know even if theyre mostly there just to Be A Kid Tee Em but i like that in genshin the kids matter more than like. an accessory?#idk if that description makes sense but sometimes in media kids will exist mostly to make u be like omg single father my heartttttt uwahhh#anyway my tags got way off topic from the main post. basically. i miss kipo and like paimon#oh also? paimon nobiney. i had 'proof' once but i dont think i have enough tags left on here to type it out and tbh most cis people would#not consider my proof as proof. as well as many aimon haters of the trans sort#but its proof to ME.
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Disclaimer im just processing some thoughts im not cancelling the show
have almost thoughts about how i find the like....narrative on here that if you have chronic "zebra" conditions youd want a doctor like House and wouldnt sue for malpractice bc at least youd have a doctor that cares about whats wrong with you but lets take it one step further. so often he does NOT give a shit about the patient and actively endangers them frequently with his god damn heoric era of medicine approach? non zero amount of times he gets a diagnosis but it comes too late, or he gets a diagnosis after their first wrong 3 guesses of the episode shut down the patients kidneys and they either have to get a transplant or they are just, doomed due to other preexisting conditions etc? idk. i know ppl are almost certainly exaggerating and just letting off steam about the very real failures of our current medical systems and the ableism baked in and All That Shit. i just think its weird how ppl romanticize House who STILL, FREQUENTLY, MULTIPLE EPISODES will actively dismiss shit in the exact way that is a problem in our current system, especially when hes being Forced Against His Will To See Clinic Parients, he loves to be dismissive as fuck of symptoms and if he was a real doctor i think he'd be fucking 50/50 on cases he Notices Something To Dig Into vs cases he dismisses as an Anxious Hysterical Woman Who Wants Attention, the only reason he's Right so frequently in his snap judgements is cos it reinforces the narrative. its like a crime drama that has the mastermind serial killer masterfully using "loopholes" and lawyering up all sneaky and dodging Justice and if only our poor little cop protags were allowed to do A TEENY BIT of Justified Police Brutality, they could Save Lives!
and like sometimes in the show they will have a patient die despite his efforts to narratively punish him. not to mention, i think its been at least mildly brought up and glossed over how much they absolutely do not think about insurance costs for these ppl for the insane amount of tests that find nothing and Wrong Medications To Force A Diagnosis they use? i think it was brought up once in the episode following a day in the life of cuddy where she had to fight a lawsuit bc a guys insurance like didnt cover his thumb being reattached but chase reattached it anyway while in surgery cos it was The Right Thing To Do and the guy didnt have the money to cover it and the insurance wouldnt pay unless he sued the hospital or whatever. thats like the only time its come up. whereas like frequently the doctor I go to for osteopathic manipulation tries to check in with me and make sure im covered by insurance etc and that im not going to go broke or get buried in medical debt seeing her.
idk. just some Thoughts. not a defense of our current system and all the flaws it enables and enforces etc. his approach to medicine is really reminiscent to me of what I know of the Heroic Era Of Medicine which i dont...love? and hes framed on here as being an asshole but would kill for his patients to get them a diagnosis etc. but hes definitely extremely paternalistic to patients ? and despite some good clippable lines about ableism and being against eugenics, it honestly feels like his stance on that is kind of a toss up.
#toy txt post#AGAIN THIS IS NOT A DEFENSE OF OUR CURRENT SYSTEM NOR AM I TRYING TO 'CANCEL' THE SHOW#i am simply processing some Thoughts about it#and wishing better doctors upon all of you when you need them#doctors who Listen To You and who Put In The Effort and The Work to figure out why you feel like shit#who also arent calling you slurs the whole time and throwing random fucking medications at you that destroy your liver or whatever#but give them data. idk. like sometimes in the show it does seem like they need to do that! like the patient is actively dying and the risk#to info ratio is such that it makes sense. other times its like you like definitely couldve done other things to rule shit out but you#needed to fit this whole patient arc into a single episode#not to mention i feel like any doctor who approached shit even close to the way he does would Not have his success rate#no matter how smart the payoff would Not be worth it bc theyd kill more patients. they would not be getting lucky everytime. real life does#not have a plot narrative to fulfill if house treated you he'd just fucking kill you#also one more disclaimer I AM AWARE DR GREGORY HOUSE IS A FICTIONAL MADE UP BLORBO CHARACTER#AND THAT MOST OF THE PPL JOKING ABOUT THIS DO NOT NEED THE REMINDERS OR WARNINGS OR DISCLAIMERS ABOUT HIM ETC ETC#IM SIMPLY THINKING ABOUT HIM AND THIS SHOW AND REAL LIFE#and am only a little bit uncomfortable w the level to which his approach is romanticized on tumblr dot com. but i understand why and like#fair enough#anyway watching house MD is like a sawbones episode displaced in time and Very Worrying#i just have the finale of s7 left and then i will start s8#and i am dreading the aphobia episode. but it cannot be worse than the horrific intersexism and transphobic he's put on display right#right?#i guess its probably not worse in that from what ive seen on tumblr. he is being aphobic to an adult and not a teenager. so#also house is infuriating bc if you remove the doctor bit. i have met this man so many times and i want to kill him ♡#the guy who is just allowed to stampede through life being a total ass with no pushback or accountability and terrorize people#hes a bad employee and a worse boss#okay turning reblogs off on this cos i dont trust ppl. i think i have replies restricting to mutuals too so#that way this doesnt break containment and get misinterpreted
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really tempted to rewatch both simm and hidden agenda and write up a defense of dunk's acting
#it makes me kinda sad when people bash him :(#does he nail every single moment?? no ofc not#but he's definitely not as bad as i've seen some people say#there are also many things he does beautifully. that have me go yessss!! this is what it's all about!!!!#maybe i should just start a youtube channel#how do i talk about acting in english tho#i'm missing essential words such as spielrichtung‚ anspielen‚ das miteinander‚ sich einlassen auf‚ aufeinander eingehen‚ abnehmen‚ etc#(not my uni profs in my head telling me to go find some parallel texts to solve that vocabulary issue but the thing is!! i'm too lazy kjdfk#having an education in something is a blessing and a curse sigh#airenyah plappert#dunk natachai#adrm#and so what if he doesn't nail everything!! so what if there's room for improvement!!#newsflash: even fandom favorites have their moments that aren't the best of their acting#oh baby i have opinions about [redacted] in [redacted] that you could never even imagine#and the show in question is even one of the only 3 dramas that i have rated a 10/10 on mydramalist#once again i'm thinking about that time the other week where i showed my mom some concert performances#and mentioned how some people were saying dunk is a bad actor#and halfway through the video she went#''also wenn ich mir das so anschau‚ is er hundertmal ein besserer schauspieler als der‚ der so aufgehypet wird''#i refuse to say in public who she's referring to with ''der der so aufgehypet wird'' but trust me it's a beloved fandom favorite 🤭🤭🤭#also the people saying this clearly never watched that one mv they starred in a while back#my boy dunk natachai fucking carried that whole story line
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possibly a controversial opinion and absolutely not trying to take a shot at anyone who disagrees, but I think having portraits show up for comms at the end of a dungeon/raid is a terrible feature. great in theory but terrible in actuality. I don't care about my comm count (and couldn't tell you what it is) but it was always nice to get some in instances where I knew I'd done a kick ass job supporting the team (as a healer or rdm usually). it was people saying thank you
I'm a really average player but there's some content I know very well and can help other players in. I love helping people and it's just a good feeling when you get thanked after. like hey, I was useful! I made a contribution!
that vanished completely when portraits came out (I've done roulettes almost every day for the last 8 months due to leveling all the jobs and just enjoying it, so it was really really easy for me to track the change...there were a few exceptions but overall it was like night and day from before). (and yes, people could obviously see your glam before but having it directly in the comm ui is different)
I got a trickle back when I put some effort into making fun portraits (something I personally don't enjoy doing but felt obligated to do), but I don't play a cute cat boy or a lady with big boobs (two things I've actually seen people online say tempt them into giving comms) and my portraits are definitely not as fancy as a lot of people's and more than that it just feels like that shouldn't matter
so yeah, not a fan. actually turned them off for myself the first time they popped up because it just felt strange. leave them at the start and take them out at the end would be my best solution since, like I said, really neat idea in theory and I think people should be proud of their cool glams and show them off. but it also really sucks to be in what feels a lot like a beauty pageant
#I play on crystal and I expect that does not help even a little bit lolol#no hate to anyone who likes it#just my person experience has been really sad?#like I started really noticing when I was healing alliance raids a bunch after they added portraits#and I'd do ones where I was carrying the team and working my ass off#I used to get 4-5 comms from those types of situations#I was getting zero#consistently#I thought it was a coincidence at first but it persisted#I went and spent a little bit of time making a vaguely interesting portrait#that was mostly a animated cool weapon effect up in the camera#INSTANTLY started getting some again#flipped it on and off and yeah#I think playing a male au ra isn't doing me any favors either#would be fascinating to see statistics on this#would be uhh interesting to see how things like...say...character skin color and comm rate related...yah know#but I did go and poke around online and found people talking about which glam things they'd give comms for#and how to set your portrait up for maximum comms#I wish there was a better way to do this#ffxivmp#mp#also sucks more because my portraits break every ten seconds because having linked plates doesn't play nice with it#like it is really total dogshit how badly that part is broken#change to a job with a linked plate outside of a sanctuary? congrats you're fucked even if the glam is correct and matches#good chance the portrait menu won't display it as needing an update either and you'll have to force update it#great work team 0/10#my general criteria for comming is 1) someone did awesome 2) a sprout who is clearly new and trying their best#3) someone was really helpful in chat or did a dorito 4) the default healer/tank and dps/dps courtesy comm#oh and 5) it's not even that the healer was awesome it's just that I sucked and they had to pick my dumb ass up a lot 😔
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Night on the Bionis’ Shoulder.
#xcde#xenoblade#had to fucking FIGHT the xc2 lighting engine for these ones#ive definitely talked about this before. the xc2 lighting engine makes everything look like shit at night#what looks okay at night? glowy things#so i sought out glowy things#all things considered i think these turned out pretty good#but at any rate#what happened with gael gar. like what purpose did he serve#the final quest with him was just annoying to be honest like he basically asks melia to come kill him#like i didnt think he even had a reasonable point of view#which could be interesting to investigate from a position of 'he's a fanatic and isn't logical' but it isn't played like that#he just kind of exists#blows up a lab#says some weird unjustifiable shit and then leaves#melia's comebacks were not exactly that good either#anyways im sure theres more analysis to be done about that character but i just dont want to#he does not interest me and neither do his perspectives#which i think is kind of sad because there could have been some really interesting stuff about how the post-zanza world should be run#considering everything that has changed#like who put shulk and co in charge? they are mostly essentially children who grew strong enough to kill god#i feel like they could have done something really interesting with some people reasonably pushing back against the new people in charge#but instead we get 'i dont like the ancestors!' vs 'i like the ancestors!'
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Something about the Biffy Clyro song 'Unknown Male 01' makes it feel like such an angry and poignant piece against dismissing male suicide rates and the difficulty men have with their own lives. Like in Scotland, as many places, it is such an issue and so many people ignore it...
And knowing this song was made in honour of a legendary Scottish indie musician who did in fact take that path, that's sharp. Scottish men really do actually struggle with this and I wish they didn't.
Guess I know what charity cause I'm gonna look at next I have enough money to support two charities at once consistently. (I already donate to a homeless/housing charity, and don't plan to stop)
#chatter#tw suicide discussion#it's important to acknowledge the big issues in your country#and for Scotland#male suicide rates are pretty bad#one of the more common things i know to have happened among Scots even in my age group#and relevant to stuff I'm writing as well#i write plenty Scottish characters and stories set in Scotland#it would be remiss of me as someone vocally political and aware to a degree of the state of being Scottish#to pretend that isn't a fact#(and unlike the racism/xenophobia issue i have more licence to talk about it)#(not to say i won't talk about how Scotland has racism problems. it very much does. unequivocally and without argument)#(but i can't speak from the position of a victim of it as I'm a Caucasian Scot and therefore benefit from it whether i want to or not)#anyway. thoughts today. feeling maudlin and a little grief for strangers and friends alike
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being normal about audiobooks again. prommy. but whyyyyy why why why why why why dont audiobook narrators following in other narrator’s footsteps within the same series (ESPECIALLY FANTASY) just . quickly have a listen to the prev person’s pronunciation of words. i wish it wasnt this hard and yet.
#im listening to crystal awakening and well 1. i looooove learning new stuff about delanos and all the spires#and i love that this is katashi again even tho we technically already associate katashi with a different spire but like thats wrong#and id love to know what the timeline on this is (though if the prologue has anything to do with that i think its a couple years before AA)#but its like. ugh ok listen to nick podehl when narrating aa is narrating from a limited 1st pov so it doesnt matter how he says delanos#i mean it . does but i can ignore it bc corin is from valia so we can just pretend the inconsistency there is on corins part#but you caaaant have a valian character pronounce valia as vah-lia if corin pronounces it vay-lia#&&& like with the whole delanos thing its more of a declension issue so its fine i can pretend to be normal#but like. brother the word is spelled valia it should not be so hard you literally have a 50% success rate#& like. im pretty sure corin mentions valia within the very first chapter of aa1#(and also in general i dont really care i think i as the audience should get to complain and make demands. bc i love aa)#anyway its whatever i am loving this one a lot#i think sage is such a sweetheart (& emiko but that goes without saying) & hahne (idk how to spell that)#theyre very very interesting & mysterious which we love. & i love the male narrator a lot i love how he makes aldis sound#recently read#starting the year off right by reading both of my fave authors (andrew & china)
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Knowing how much Yuri tics with "ma" and "oi" just fills me with life and joy.
#GTF Vesperia Things#GTF Yuri Things#starting to wonder if at this rate I just want to have a separate ''things'' tag for Vesperia and for Yuri...#also fwiw Yuri says ''ma/maa'' 68 times in Rays and ''oi/oi oi'' 54 times unless I /missed/ some#yes i combed the entire script. yes i counted.#yes i may or may not end up combing vesperia's script over it too#it's just rly cute... but most things yuri does are cute... silly little guy... cute silly guy...#except when flynn is in danger then he's just downright terrifying#im still not actually convinced that yuri did NOT have torture in mind when he confronted baldo and nazar#like he was scary when he threatened cumore saying it's about time for you to get off the stage#confronting baldo and nazar tho? yyyyikes! inb4 I make a comparison video between those two scenes#bc I'd argue my silly little guy's scariest moment in Vesp was with Cumore#but scary does not even properly express him threatening Baldo and Nazar#this has nothing to do with his cute little ticcing anymore but listen now i have two missions#edit: i checked the vesperia script at the beginning of the game and already snagged one so now im determined#he said it once before i even realized he'd said it bc the first time i recalled was during the battle tutorial#he says it so much it goes over my head sometimes but that's just honestly adorable and i love#im so used to it i don't even hone in on it or recognize it bc it's so common#EDIT EDIT: NO WHY AM I TEMPTED TO TRANSLATE ALL OF YURI'S LINES I HATE THIS#I LOVE HIM AND HOW HE TALKS SO MUCH AND THAT'S THE CULPRIT BUT LIKE.#you know what okay maybe I will do that. I just gotta. get through this first. bc.#it'd take too long to count these AND tl at the same time right... ... ...right... ...#NAH BRO I'M TLING RAYS I CANT' GET SIDETRACKED... ...well i guess i can. for yuri...#what if i just do both....... what if i just... do both.............#ACTUALLY YOU KNOW WHAT IF I DO TL YURI'S LINES IN VESP#I CAN TL ALL THE MAS AND OIS YES I CAN god help me..........
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