#how do I survive this
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#I am filled with so much rage and hurt these days#it’s like all I’m doing is surviving and feeling those two things#how do I do this#how do I survive this#my heart hurts and im angry about it#it’s not fair#not fair#not. fair.#im never gonna prove that I was worth the time#never gonna show her that I made something of myself without her help#how do I say goodbye to someone I never knew#im trying so hard not to let anyone see that im hurting#but im hurting so much these days#delete later
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So this is how my life is going at the moment:
Saturday: La Pluie airs
Sunday, Monday: La Pluie Brainrot days
Monday, Tuesday: Step by Step Brainrot starts creeping in
Tuesday: Step by Step airs
Wednesday, Thursday: Step by Step Brainrot days + Our Skyy 2 airs
Friday, Saturday: Our Skyy 2 Brainrot days
Saturday: La Pluie airs
And the cycle continues.
Oh, and don't forget the surprise Only Friends chaos that is unleashed upon us whenever the cast and crew decides to wreak havoc.
If anyone has suggestions on how to be a functioning human being with this schedule, I'm all ears. Pls save me
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#i'm not good enough in time management to be a bl fan#how do i survive this#is giving up the only option#drop your coping mechanisms i need them#step by step#step by step the series#only friends#only friends series#only friends the series#la pluie#la pluie the series#our skyy 2
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I don’t know how to function rn. After losing my mom. Everything that happened between us is out of mind but still there. I can’t even blame her. Trauma is hard and I know she was traumatized and brought it out on me. But that’s in the past. We were just repairing the trauma though. We were just getting better. And now she’s gone. I’ll never have another Christmas or Thanksgiving where she would ask what I’m thankful for. I never said her. I never said I’m thankful for you mommy. It feels pointless to be alive rn. Pointless to wanna live in a world where my mom isn’t here. Pointless to get married young since she’s not here anymore. I just was talking to her about getting married young and I was thinking maybe I should for you to be able to see it. I haven’t done anything with my life yet. I graduated from high school. That’s it. I was so close to getting a promotion at work. I just wanted her to be proud of me. But we never talked. I just figured it needed time and I needed time. But I guess time has never been in my favor. I know she was proud of me and I know she loves me so much. To the end of her life she loves me still. She’ll never stop. But I just wanted her to know I loved her. Even though I only communicated so often. It hurts so bad.
#parent loss#i miss my mom#therapy#help my heart#help my soul#self help#how do i do this#how do i survive this#depressed#kinda depressing#advice#advice needed
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bipolar symptoms bad. very very bad right now.
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Bisan is calling for another global strike!
I saw some posts just outlining Jan 21st, and wanted to clarify that Bisan has called for a full seven days of action.
What a global strike would look like is:
calling in sick to work
purchasing bare essentials ahead of the week so you can observe the general boycott of goods / buying as little as you genuinely can
putting in a concerted effort to elevate Palestinian voices and make it clear that this strike is in support of a permanent ceasefire!
For those who will have to purchase necessary goods during this time, please observe the brands that the BDS movement is asking us to boycott!
♢♢♢
Right now is also a good time to mention some better uses for your money during this week.
Available e-sims in Gaza are running low!!
Mirna El Helbawi and her team are working round the clock to continue to connect Palestinians as Israel does its best to cut them off from the rest of the world.
You can learn how to purchase and send e-sims here, and below you’ll find a list of what is currently needed (the areas in brackets indicate what region you should select to buy e-sims in).
--
CareforGaza is an organisation that does verifiably good work, distributing supplies directly to Palestinian families.
They have a Gofundme set up at the moment, but because of Gofundme’s poor track record regarding refusing to transfer funds to Palestinians, I’d recommend continuing to donate directly to their PayPal here.
Good luck to all of you. Don't turn away from Palestine!
#i know that for some people their first instinct will be to scoff. how can anyone just not buy things for a full week?#what about groceries? rent?#and personally. i wanna say yes. there are some things that we have to spend money on to survive.#but it is possible still to make a concerted effort in your life#to carve out seven days where you can minimise that amount of money#i know its a lot.#for some people who are living on a tight budget. i know its not possible and i dont fault you for that#but i know for a fact that so many of us would be able to take out a few daily purchases in observance of this strike#do your best#dont turn away from palestine#free palestine#palestine#from the river to the sea#call to action
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main take aways from Halloween (1978) rewatch:
michael myers is canonically 21??? this bitch should be at the club
*sees tiddies* ***MURDEROUS RAMPAGE NOISES***
that's it that's the movie
outside of the fact that everyone who has sex is murdered by the narrative, this is a surprisingly chill portrayal of female sexuality? these teen girls are horny and actively enjoying Getting It On with their boytoys. no pushy boyfriends sneaking in through their bedroom windows--these ladies are taking the initiative to sneak out and GET SOME. one of them gets laid and then immediately orders her boyfriend to get her a beer. (yes she gets Slashered soon afterward, but so does the boyfriend so honestly, gender equality.) yes the Final Girl is the only one not having sex, but she's not bullied for that, nor are her friends slut shamed except possibly by being murdered by the narrative
actually the only character who is shown being morally condemned on-screen is michael myers. specifically FOR his violent overreaction to other people's sex lives. (people he is spying on). metaphorically, the villain is American Puritanism sticking its judgy nose into other people's business.
aka Michael Myers Is A Republican
but actually the real villain is the doctor. guy's a judgemental, shaming, pathologizing asshole. and he's been in charge of michael's care since he was SIX YEARS OLD? kid never had a chance. i'd go on a killing spree too
also the parents. where are the parents? it's halloween night and all the teenage girls are home babysitting their younger siblings? come to think of it, michael's first victim was his own older sister, whom he killed while she was babysitting him. teen girls are really shouldering a labour burden here. maybe parentification is the true villain
side note: mike commits his first murder wearing a clown costume...which is never referenced again? his 'iconic' costume is a generic mask and wig and jumpsuit, when we coulda had a Killer Clown Michael Myers??? travesty
i like how the Final Girl and her friend casually smoke weed in her car. yeah she's an honor student and her friend is the sheriff's daughter. yeah they smoke weed. so what it's 1978
(to reiterate, mike is 21 and should be at the club. im not saying he shouldn't be rampaging, im saying it's sad that he broke out, tasted freedom for the first time in his life, and immediately snuck back into his childhood home to go rampaging. let's have a remake where he goes to a nightclub and has a few beers. maybe some slutty dancing. then rampage)
oh no he's hot
#HALLOWEEN#halloween the movie#michael myers#do you think he's a mike? mikey? to his friends? if slashers had friends?#i'll be honest i was expecting this movie to be way more of a bitch to its female characters#i mean yeah they died but so did some dudes#there's just a lack of cattiness compared to the way most later movies portrayed teenage girls idk#yeah the Final Girl is a Virgin and a Bookworm. but there's no bullying or any strong sense that's she's morally superior to everyone else#mostly she AND the other girls feel a bit sorry for her lack of a social life. one even tries to set her up with a date to the school dance#solidarity! trying to get your nerd friend laid!#overall it's just teenagers being teenagers and then a slasher comes in and ruins everything with his Lack Of Chill#like yeah dude sometimes teenagers have sex. get over it#also something to be said about how while the girl who survives is the one who isn't sexually active and dresses conservatively...#ultimately those things aren't ENOUGH to prevent her from being targeted#you could say that the other girls 'provoked' the villain (the same way women irl are so often accused of provoking their attackers)#but ultimately that doesn't keep the Final Girl safe. it just delays the inevitable.#because violent men never need excuses. no matter how eager society is to provide them.#ultimately she is at the mercy of the same violent whims because it was never her behavior that invited the violence.#gendered violence doesn't need an invitation.#also she doesn't save herself the doctor saves her#it's not her actions or choices that put her in danger OR save her from it--once again it is the whim of a man#no this wasn't intended to be a feminist movie it's just fun how you could argue it that way
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hey btw if you're in the USA at 2:20 p.m. ET on Wednesday, Oct. 4, they're testing the emergency broadcast system. your phone is probably going to make a really loud noise, even if it's on silent. there's a backup date on the 11th if they need to postpone it.
if you're not in a safe situation and have an extra phone, you should turn that phone completely off beforehand.
additionally, if you're like me, and are easily startled; i recommend treating it like a party. have a countdown or something. be surrounded by your loved ones. take the actions you personally need to take to make yourself safe.
i have already seen mockery towards any person who feels nervous about this. for the record, it completely, completely valid to have "emergency broadcast sounds" be an anxiety trigger. do not let other people make fun of you for that. emergency sounds are legitimately engineered to make us take action; those of us with high levels of anxiety and/or neurodivergence are already pre-disposed to have a Bad Time. sometimes it is best to acknowledge that the situation will be triggering for some, and to prepare for that; rather than just saying "well that's stupid, it's just a test."
"loud scary sound time" isn't like, my favorite thing, but we can at least try to prevent some additional anxiety by preparing for it. maybe get yourself a cake? noise cancelling headphones? the new hozier album? whatever helps. love u, hope you're okay. we are gonna ride it out together.
#watching ppl go from being like ''support neurodivergent ppl~~!"#to being like ''if this is going to give u a panic attack ur fuckken stupid''#like..... gets me#yeah man. i know im going to be triggered by it . in the old fashioned term. it is GOING to give me a panic attack. it's pretty much certai#and i shouldn't have to tell u about what i have survived for you to be okay with that.#you can just trust that i ALSO don't want me to react to it. i'm not gonna be having a FUN time.#dismissing that bc you think it's stupid.... like is the whole problem.#these sounds are workshopped by entire teams of people to get you to pay attention and move quickly.#they arent meant to be fun and exciting.#OBVIOUSLY it's gonna set ppl off.#but yeah there's something so fuckken demeaning about ppl being like. well that trigger isn't valid bc u haven't undergone X#dude i have ptsd bc i was abused as a child. like plain and simple. the fact im 30 and afraid of the dark tells you how bad it was.#i shouldn't have to ask u for permission to be mentally ill.#the reason it's a fucking disorder and not a fucking choice is that I DO NOT CONTROL IT.#like how is it any different from when ppl are like ''oh public speaking isn't that scary'' like FOR YOU#for YOU this isn't scary. now if i could fucking eat my own amygdala...
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What comic is the bottom left image of springtrap from? (On the post where you say why you draw him blocky)
It’s from this comic!! A very normal father son reunion
Og post here
#ask reply#I still love this comic#THE backgrounds how both Springtrap and Michael looks??? perfect peak love#I gotta do more jokes around fnaf 3#mostly because I love the setting of Fazbear frights itself!#a fnaf horror attraction in universe is just so cool#phone dude is cool#I love how Michael was probably at Fazbear frights for awhile too#seeing phone dude says ‘welcome back’#and the survival logbook just heavily implies Michael was writing in it during that game#with all the foxy drawings repping Michael and all#ITS JUST overall a cool location with many interesting details#maybe I should draw Hudson and Michael being coworkers sometime#all three phone dude Hudson and Michael being buddies pff#no promises but imagine 🩵🩵 maybe 🩵#shout out to fnaf 3 enjoyers 💚
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searching for a star that's still unknown to anyone!
#for finncakes.arts dtiys on instagram... i missed you wxs#project sekai#pjsk#prsk#proseka#emu otori#tsukasa tenma#nene kusanagi#rui kamishiro#wonderlands x showtime#wxs#polysho#my ipad did not survive this one its at 3% after like 5 procreate crashes#and sending me visions of it being put down like a dog. Not happening#kirapipi album release im FREE#wxs getting 1 another wanopo comm and 2 a traditional japanese style song. ive been saying they need it. emu deep voice can save the world#I drew emus recent card the untrained but i dont KNOW HOW TO RENDER SNYMORE IDK HOW TO DO IT. SO SHES TRAPPED#in my wip art timeloop for eternity.#tsukasa is pissing me off so bad in this no matter how many times i drew and redrew his head imhe just completely breaks the illusion of#depth i think i actually did alright on rui and emu. i love how theynlook. Went hard rendering tsukasas outfit i guess which.#pisses me off MORE. its NOT THE FOCAL POINT. TSUKASA INHOPE YOUR NEXT LIM HAIRCUT IS EVEN MORE STUPID. YOURE RUINING MY LIFE.#whats supposed to be his hand is so fucked up with the perspective too helppp me just pretend its nenes.#the tonal difference from my ladt post is so funny. fuck you siffrin you stupud cat
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mourning black and the death of ideals
#i haven't moved on from this yet. btw. i'm still here#finally decided to draw the thought i've been ruminating over for days on end bc it's like a parasite eating away my brain#stated this on the initial post i made days ago but there's just smt so gut wrenching and sickening#about how dazai will have worn black exactly twice in his life: once as a member of the mafia and now at kunikida's funeral#a color that initially signified devotion to the mafia and his demon prodigy alias now signifies his grief#him having to wear black again at the funeral of another doomed fatalist who chose his heart over his survival. his own partner.#kunikida's death being so reminiscent of the tragedy that initially caused him to defect and flee#and everything tying together full circle and effectively breaking him#asagiri rly said fuck knkdz it's doppover we lost gang 😭😭😭#why did bro leave that fucking notebook behind#fool. do you know that angst potential you have left me to work with?#love never won in bsd. it lay dead and festering#i don't know how much longer i can keep saying i miss them. i'm going to kill myself if he doesn't come back#i've never wanted something to be death bait so desperately#bungou stray dogs#bungo stray dogs#bsd#dazai osamu#osamu dazai#kunikidazai#knkdz#kunizai#(??? technically. its implied anyway)#lotus draws
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"This place is called the Burial Mounds. The hatred is intense, isn't it? And the resentment too? When a living person enters this place, there's no coming back-- for the body or the soul. They can forget about ever escaping. Wei Wuxian, you, too, can forget about ever escaping."
(full resolution here)
#mdzs#mo dao zu shi#the grandmaster of demonic cultivation#mdzs fanart#wei wuxian#yiling patriarch#burial mounds#mxtx#fanart#art#i called this file “a wake” while working on it lol#do u ever think about how MXTX has declined to describe Wei Wuxian's time surviving the burial mounds the first time#because she says it would be too horrific to depict#at least after all of the suffering of his first life he eventually gets a happily ever after with his lan zhan#I wanted to portray what isn't really shown in the adaptations but could be a picture of what wwx's experience would've been like#hopefully this accomplishes that feeling#my drawings
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#megop#transformers#transformers one#maccadams#transformersedit#tfedit#animationedit#filmedit#maccadam#tf one#optimus prime#megatron#mine#mine: megop#mine: edits#what do you mean BEFORE I MOVE YOU MYSELF#this final trailer with if i fall in the background broke my heart#how am i going to survive this movie :(#their voices in these scenes :((((
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QUICK NO ONE'S LOOKING
(See readmore for thoughts, cope, bonus, etc.)
Anyone else up thinking about Ratio's big, strong, secure arms and how warm and all-consuming they could be in a hug or embrace. :/ Anyway
I just wanted to draw them being cute and seizing a sliver of a moment where they could have some PDA silly time without actually having any eyes on them. They're public figures and working adults with very clear boundaries between public persona and private life (to varying degrees of "in a sad way"), so while it may be in Aventurine's nature to constantly blur lines for various agendas and self-preservation (read: play "the flirt" without an aligned goal), I believe that in an actual relationship they'd be fairly private.
It's kind of fun to break your own rules, though! Ratio would be more upset about the consequences, though. He's a little bit of a hypocrite, which is devastating for someone of such discipline, but nobody's perfect.
I'm of the mentality of, "If you're tired of working on it, then just post it!", so here are some fun peripherals that I didn't feel like adding:
Some staff in the background sweeping up to evoke a blended sense of fragile privacy and liminal time.
A laptop on the aquarium/bar/counter because there's something fascinating about seeing people on their work laptops in public.
The rest of their clothes (casual friday)
#hsr#dr. ratio#aventurine#aventio#ratiorine#my art#hsr fanart#there's nothing profound about this I just like drawing cute fluff. I'm having fun with my Gay Working Adults Romance#epic universe! still have to get on a conference call with ten people kind of thing#i'm always thinking about how both of them control the personality they convey very meticulously#how it's a survival mechanism for aventurine but some... other thing for ratio....#it's practicality and discipline and ideals.#it's also ''midnight on a sunday'' so i am going to schedule this to post at a ''normal hour''#and then ''go to bed''#what wip do i work on next. the answer is probably nothing i've already started#my art: hsr#aventurine doing his evil flirting thing to rile people up 🤝 ratio trying to ''be in character'' on the IPC broadcast and making his and#aventurine's work partnership ''seem blurry and messy''#= manufactured youtuber drama#they're going home and ratio's going to bake some fish dude!!!! aventurine is LLLLLLITERALLLYYYYY turning on the radio#and helping him peel carrots.#and most importantly#they are NOT googling themselves ‼
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10 hours folks...
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Rewatching Adventure Time, I can't help but think so much Princess Bubblegum discourse would be non-existent if people actually watched the show to completion instead of randomly hyperfocusing on some of PB's bad deeds.
There's a very bizarre and commonly held belief that Princess Bubblegum did terrible things and got away with it, that nobody held her accountable. When the show makes a point, repeatedly, that Princess Bubblegum is well meaning but deeply flawed, and to some characters, straight up evil.
I see fans point to "The Cooler" a lot as proof that PB is an irredeemable character, and while it is her worst act in the entire show.... I think people forgot that that was the point. Near the end of the episode she stops spying on people in Ooo because it was an invasion of privacy. In another episode she's called out for exploiting some aliens and lets them go. She feels ashamed that her own people are terrified of her. She loses her entire kingdom, and realizes she needs to get her shit together.
I'm pretty critical of shows that are way too lenient on flawed female characters but Princess Bubblegum isn't one of them. She's awesome, and heavily misunderstood.
#txt#and i wouldnt even say this is a fandom problem because most fans who are actually dedicated to the series love her#its people who stopped watching after like season 5 and then watched a few eps and then the finale#its just a version of PB in their head that doesnt represent her entire character#like damn i rewatched rattleballs and this episode fans treat as proof that she's immoral was just the equivalent of doing a couple recalls#or how lemongrab was 'abandoned' when he is a grown ass man who physically and verbally abuses her people.#AND SHE STILL WENT OUT OF HER WAY TO PROVIDE HIM A KINGDOM AND SOME FOOD.#thats not even getting into the massive misunderstanding around her relationship with finn#how finn only survived the first fight with the lich because she gave him a sweater out of concern for his health#and then there's people complaining about her doing necromancy??? ARE YOU SERIOUS#FINN KILLS PEOPLE. LET THE GIRL DO SOME NECROMANCY
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The reason Psych is the Important Show of All Time is because it said "friendship is the MOST important thing." Like, yes, the romances were good but the show spends even more time emphasizing and developing the friendships and that's why it rocks. Lassiter and Juliet love and support each other unconditionally without even the slightest whiff of romance and it is SO. REFRESHING. When Juliet almost dies, Lassie sacrifices his favorite gun to save her without any hesitation. He's the one there to hold her while she cries. She's his confidant. She leaves everything she knows behind so he can chase his dream of being chief without reprocussion. That's a deep, wholesome kind of platonic love. They also never had Shawn be jealous of how close Jules and Lassie are - instead, in the final episode, we see Shawn thanking Lassie for loving and supporting Juliet. We simply don't do that jealousy crap here. Lassie and Jules are best friends and that's an excellent thing. And then there's Shawn and Gus. Those characters are narratively and physically inseperable. The show makes it VERY clear that, without the other, neither one is complete. They balance each other and exacerbate each other's hijinks at the same time. They're closer than close and everyone around them just accepts it. It's just the way those two dumb boys are and no one is going to try to get between that. And then, of course, SO many friendships develop over the course of the show. Lassie and Shawn form a begrudging friendship eventually. Juliet and Karen end up bonding more than I think either expected. Friendship is the beating heart of this series and it's presented in a way that is unique and fun and I just don't see a lot of other shows that do it like Psych did.
#mostly I appreciate the fact that Psych showed unconditional platonic love between a man and a woman without ever making it weird#I cannot express enough how important Jules and Lassie are to me#SO IMPORTANT#I value platonic relationships a LOT because romantic relationships are good but platonic relationships are the foundation of survival#and its so nice to see a show that values it in the same way I do#ANYWAY#WATCH PSYCH#Psych#shawn spencer#burton guster#juliet o'hara#carlton lassiter
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