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fairlyang · 1 year ago

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Easy money I 🕷️

in which your roomie needs your help for a shoot

w/c: 3.1K

pairing: pornstaroomie!miguel x f!reader

tags: 18+ smut. tension, recording, groping, fingering, squirting

notes: all my readers loved this series and might’ve been peer pressured for a part 3 but I’m kinda excited to write it :D gonna post this rn and maybe part 2 tmrw, finish up all my part 3’s soon hopefully

part two

I heard a knock on my door so I lowered my music from my airpods. "Come in!" I yell and turn to look at my laptop.

I hear the door open and Miguel clears his throat, I turn around to look at him and raise an eyebrow, "what's up?"

"I need something from you...." He says and takes a step inside.

"Like what?" I ask and he takes another step forward.

"You're gonna have to hear me out alright?" He says and I narrow my eyes at him.

"Okay..." I say and take my airpods off leaving them on my desk before turning back to look at him, giving him my full attention.

"I need you to step in for tonight's shoot..." he says and I burst out laughing.

"Are you fucking joking?" I say and shake my head. Is this man serious?

"I need your help Y/n..." he says nearing the edge of my bed and I groan.

"Why me?"

"The girl I was gonna shoot with canceled on me last minute and all the girls I usually shoot with are unavailable." He explains and I blink.

"Andddd you are already here...." He adds and i scoff.

"Not really sure I'd wanna expose myself like that Miguel." I say and stand up, walking over to my bed and plop down on it.

He sighs and sits on the edge of it and looks at me with pleading eyes. "Please? For me?"

"And the camera would hide your face, so unless you have any noticeable tattoos on your lower body then I think you'd be in the clear." He says and I bite my lip. Well there lies the problem...

I blink looking at him in silence making him scoff as he widens his eyes slightly then his lips tug into a smirk. "Where do you have it?" he asks and I feel my face heat up.

"Uh that one spot that's like lower, inner hip..." I say quietly and turn my gaze to my window.

There was really no reason for me to be acting like this- but that tattoo wasn't exactly somewhere that most people in my life know.... So maybe... just maybe...

"No face?" I ask and he nods.

"You know I don't even show my face-" he says with a small smile.

"I know but I don't know if it's different for the girls you record with." I say and shrug.

"It depends on them mainly, I'm not gonna force anyone I work with to show their face if they don't want to." He says softly and I nod slowly.

"And you wanna do this like right now?" I ask and he nods again.

"Jesus-" I mutter and run a hand over my hair.

"Up to you but you know I have a lot of loyal subscribers and make decent money off this..." he says and I chuckle.

"Because the girls love your voice and body." I say and he smirks making me regret my choice of words. And queue to him being obnoxious about it...

"I-"

"Think so huh?" he teases in a cocky tone making me groan.

"Fuck off." I say and grab a random stuffed animal from my bed and throw it at his face.

He laughs and holds it, it was so small compared to his hands. Oh god-

I mean of fucking course I've noticed how fine he is- it was the first thing I noticed when I was interviewing people to be my roommate, he was the hottest man that came in needing a place to stay.

I didn't just decide on him because he was hot but because he seemed chill and not like someone that would murder me in my sleep.

But I never made a move on him, neither did he. We've just always had some type of tension that neither of us ever paid attention to... I guess until now..

"So what exactly did you plan to shoot?" I ask and let out a sigh.

He grins and scoots closer now sitting by my legs as they were stretched out. "I was thinking fingering."

I nod and bite my lip, "hmm.."

"Up to you I won't force you but just think of the fact that you'd be getting paid to get fingered." He says and I snicker.

Sounds like easy money...

And I'd get an orgasm out of it...

"50% of whatever the video makes will go to you." He says and I bite my lip.

"You're really laying it on thick there Miguel... you that desperate?" I tease and he playfully rolls his eyes.

"Yeah actually, so just let me know within the next hour before I just decide to do a solo vid." He says and stands up.

I sigh and nod, "I'll... think about it...." He smirks and gives me a wink before opening the door and walking out, closing it behind him.

I sigh and lay down on my bed, should I?

I mean there's no denying the fact that I always listen in when he has someone over to record... or even checked out a few of his videos on pornhub...

maybe even possibly masturbated to a few of his audios... or the ones where he fucks himself with a fleshlight...

Letting out those incredible moans for everyone's very own pleasure, how selfless.

But he wanted to record for onlyfans which was for the ones who specifically pay to view his content, which apparently was a lot and the thought alone was a little nerve wrecking.

What if someone I've been with before recognized my tattoo and tells people I know? I'd be fucking done for and I'd just die on the spot of pure embarrassment.

But the money- how could I say no to that kind of money? Especially when seeing the views just his previews on pornhub get-

I'd be so fucking stupid to pass this opportunity...

Fuck it.

I get up from my bed and walk to my door quickly opening it before stepping out onto the hallway. I then do the walk of shame and walk to Miguel's room.

I made my mind up a little too fast god I'm not gonna hear the end of this from him-

I step in front of his door and knock twice before hearing a laugh. I groan and cross my arms across my chest, patiently waiting for him.

He opens the door with a wide smile but before I could even say a word my eyes trailed down his chest then to his abdomen. A small happy trail going down caught my eye as a pair of grey sweatpants hugged his hips perfectly.

God he looked so good...

Wait- how the fuck did he change so fast?

"Did you just assume I was going to say yes?" I ask, quickly looking up at him.

He shrugs and opens his door wide, motioning for me to step inside. I roll my eyes but walk in nonetheless, seeing that he was indeed very desperate for this. And apparently eager.

"I knew it'd be something hard for you to say no to." He says and shrugs, closing the door behind him.

"And I had an idea for more anonymity..." he says and walks past me.

He walks over to his desk and picks up two masks, robber masks. "We could put these on." He says and throws me a pink one.

I catch it and look down at it, cute.

"Just casually had these huh?" I mutter and play with it between my fingertips.

It only had three holes, obviously for the eyes and mouth. It honestly didn't shock me too much that he had these especially considering he didn't make content showing his face at all.

"Alright ready?"

"Where are we doing this? Should I change? Should I put makeup on-"

"Calm down-" he says and laughs, shaking his head at my sudden worries.

"We're doing this in my bathroom, I already set the camera and lights up." He explains and I nod.

"As for your clothes if you want I can give you one of my shirts and you can just leave your panties on." He says looking me up and down.

I wearing a SZA shirt with Cookie Monster pajama pants.... Yeah I definitely could've changed but maybe got a tiny bit excited..

He walked over to his dresser and picked the first one of top and then tossed it over to me. I caught it and unfold it to reveal a Nirvana tee. I shrug and walk over to his bathroom with him right on my tail.

I walk in then stop and quickly turn around to point a finger at him, "you're waiting- you can wait a few more minutes there O'Hara." He chuckles and backs up letting me close the door.

I quickly take off my tee shirt and put the one he gave me on. I leave my shirt on the sink then I slip out of my pj pants and realize it wasn't a big deal if he watched because he was going to see it all right now anyway.....

I look in the mirror and take a deep breath, I was really going to do this.... We were really going to do this...

I then take notice of the ring light and tripod that were right in front me. This was getting so real so fast and it was making me more nervous than I expected.

I breathe in then breathe out. I do it a couple more times and feel some nerves leave my body but some still lingering around.

I turn around and walk towards the door, I open it wide and Miguel stands up from his bed and walks over. "Finally." He teased and I chuckle.

"My bad." I mutter, turning back around and walk to the sink, leaning against it as Miguel walks in.

"You're good, don't worry it'll be fine." He reassured and gives me a small smile.

He walks over to his tripod and sets his phone on it and goes to the camera. He turns to me and motions for me to stand in front of the camera. I nod and do so, leaning against the seat with my nerves growing every second.

"Alright we're gonna start, if you need me to stop at any given moment just tap my thigh or anywhere twice okay?" He says and I nod.

"Audibly please?" He says and I chuckle.

"Yes I understand."

"Okay good." He says and throws me the pink robber mask.

I move all my hair to my back then slip it on. I fix the holes to align to my mouth and eyes then see Miguel doing the same. "This'll be fun." He mutters with a slight smirk on his face then he presses the button to record.

He walks over to me and gently puts his hands on my cheeks then leans in. I lean up and he leans down removing the last amount of space between us and crashes his lips onto mine. I kiss back and put a hand to his jaw and the other on his neck.

I then feel his hands slide down my body, at first staying at my waist, gripping my skin softly through the shirt until his hands go lower and his fingertips are playing with the hem of his shirt, near my ass.

He slid his tongue in my mouth and continues toying w his shirt, bringing it up slowly as our tongues fight for dominance but I stood no chance. Suddenly I feel a hard smack against my ass making me moan in his mouth.

He smiles and pulls away just to go down and start leaving open mouthed kisses on my neck. I sigh and tilt my head to the side as he slightly moves the mask to leave a mark where he wanted. He sucked on my skin then licked it softly before leaving a kiss on it.

I smile and grab his head, making sure he stayed in place as he kept playing with the skirt. He pulls away again and this time bringing the hem of the shirt up, slowly. He turns me around slowly so my behind is what the camera will see and lifts the shirt completely over my ass.

Another smack.

Then to the other cheek.

Another smack on each one, definitely already making them red and it seemed like he wanted to keep going because of the noises that were leaving his mouth. Such delicious groans.

He keeps pulling it up, exposing my entire bare back to the camera but my tits to him. He quickly brings it up and over my head, throwing it on the floor then quickly cups my tits and squeezes.

I gasp when he pinches both nipples then quickly turns me around so my ass was on his already hard bulge. His hands continue squeezing and I felt purely at bliss, heaven on earth even.

I lay my head back against his chest which makes him lean down and leave a kiss on my neck then suck gently on the skin as his hands continued kneading my tits.

His right hand then lets go of my boob and slowly trails down my stomach, as if easing me in, making me feel comfortable first. I grab on to his left arm and try to stand still, I already felt like I was going to go crazy and maybe fall over.

My fucking roommate was doing this- and he had such a good hand for these things so this was gonna be perfect.

His hand goes between my legs, gently rubbing my pussy through my panties. I spread my legs to help him out when he starts rubbing circles on my clit. I moan and buck my hips forward, already wanting more.

And he gives me just that, he starts going faster and I could feel my wetness seeping through the fabric of my little panties. "Miguel-"

He hums then rubs along my slit, my arousal already able to soak his fingers. How embarrassing.

He then removed his fingers making me whine until he pulls my panties down and lets them slide off my legs. I step out of them and kick them farther out, out of shot.

I spread my legs again and he doesn't hesitate to immediately start rubbing my clit again, not caring to ease me in anymore. He moans into my ear and dips his fingers on to my folds, my wetness enveloping them as he teases my hole making me grip harder onto his arm.

He moved that arm to grip on to my waist while I still held on to it for dear life. I couldn't trust myself to stand I knew I'd just end up falling and he was a big boy, he could handle me.

He then slid a finger in, slow at first until he slammed it in without warning. I gasped and clung on to his arm. He then started pumping in and out, deep and slow.

He started going faster, hitting deeper now until he fully stopped and added a second finger in. He started moving again, going faster and harder, making me a moaning mess as I looked down to watch in awe.

"Look how easy you're taking me baby." He murmurs in my ear and I couldn't help the whimper that came out of me.

"Feels so good-" I moan and he hums, pumping them even faster.

I felt myself clench against his fingers and listen to how fucking soaked I am, he barely even touched me..

"Rub your clit for me." He whispers and I nod, immediately bringing my right hand down to rub my clit in fast circles.

I moan out for him and he coos dirty little nothings into my ear as he starts curling his fingers up and hitting that sweet spot every time.

I was starting to feel my orgasm creep in already which had me shocked but then realized who was the one doing this to me...

"Fuck- Miguel-" I moan and lay my head back against him, he leans down to kiss my cheek oh so sweetly.

He then brings his open hand and starts pinching my left nipple, I felt my legs shake as he continued and I was slowly down because I was feeling so fucking close.

"Don't stop baby, be a good girl and keep rubbing that clit until you cum for me sweet girl." He murmurs and I whimper, clenching against his fingers as I rub my clit faster feeling that knot in my stomach about to burst.

"Miguel please- so cl-"

I dig my nails into his arms making him groan but he didn't say to stop. I felt my eyes growing hazier by the second and my thighs were trembling more and more by the second.

Suddenly I see white, I cry out and feel my climax crash and take over my body. I closed my eyes and almost fell to my knees, had Miguel strong arm not held me. My legs were trembling and Miguel's fingers were still inside, slowly fucking me through my orgasm.

I held onto him for dear life and start to calm my breathing down as I open my eyes, then quickly widening in pure shock, I had squirted all over the place.

I gasp and move my hand away from my clit, I stood silent, still in Miguel's arms in pure embarrassment. Squirting always felt so embarrassing, especially now because I didn't even mean to-

"That was probably the most perfect shoot I've done thus far." Miguel says making me scoff.

"I'm being so serious." He says finally taking his fingers out of me slowly and brings it up to his lips.

I tilt my head and look up, watching as he sucks on his fingers covered in my juices. Holy fuck.

I blink watching him as if in a trance, then he looks me directly in my eyes making me subconsciously squeeze my thighs together.

He takes them out with a plop and gives me a wide grin, "sorry but we have to do that again in the future...."

I laugh and look down embarrassed, I shrug and straighten up, "I guess we'll have to see if the people liked it..."

"I'm sure they will." He says and laughs.

"Let's get ya cleaned up then maybe we can watch a movie, if you'd like." He suggests and I look up at him and nod.

"That'd be perfect."

#miguel ohara smut #Miguel ohara #miguel 2099 #miguel x reader #atsv miguel #miguel o'hara #miguel spiderverse #miguel o hara #miguel ohara x reader #miguel ohara imagine #miguel ohara x you #miguel ohara x y/n #Miguel O’Hara smut #miguel spiderman #Spider-Man #across the spiderverse #easy money

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musamora · 1 year ago

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𝖓𝖎𝖈𝖐𝖓𝖆𝖒𝖊𝖘 「𝔪𝔲𝔩𝔱𝔦」 ༉‧₊˚

characters. bungou stray dogs. osamu dazai, chuuya nakahara, fyodor dostoevsky, nikolai gogol, sigma.

content. f!reader. mentions of violence, mentions of suicide attempts (dazai), alcohol (chuuya), harassment (chuuya), cussing, general sappiness. not proofread.

author's note. this started as a writing exercise to get my writing inspo flowing again, and then i began working on it on and off for a week. so enjoy! this is also an attempt to nail some of their character's down, so hopefully it isn't too OOC.

would you like to see more? fill out the taglist or comment under this post.

synopsis. what nicknames do the bungo stray dogs boys call their girlfriend?

𝗢𝗦𝗔𝗠𝗨 𝗗𝗔𝗭𝗔𝗜 ⋆⁺₊ ⸺⸺⸺

𝗗𝗘𝗔𝗥 ⋆ 𝗕𝗘𝗟𝗟𝗔𝗗𝗢𝗡𝗡𝗔 ⋆ (𝗡𝗔𝗠𝗘)-𝗖𝗛𝗔𝗡

The darkened alleyway had become thick with the stench of gunpowder and smoke, streetlights barely illuminating your path in the hush of night. You patrolled the area with quick, swift feet, hovering your gun near your hip in case of an ambush. Each step made your heart pound, sweat mixing with humidity to drench your skin as you inched toward the corner.

However, to both your dismay and prediction, Dazai wasn't taking this mission seriously—though he rarely did. It both aggravated and appeased you, knowing that if the situation became dangerous, he'd straighten up in a heartbeat. That didn't mean that his blissed smile and the skip in his step as he went on about the euphoria of death and the many methods he could die from didn't unnerve you.

Knowing him, he wouldn't mind getting shot.

"You know, my dear," he smirked, leaning close to your shoulder to whisper into your ear. "You're very sexy when you're serious." "Dazai," you chided, face stilled into an unamused expression. He fell back dramatically, flailing his hands into the air in surrender. "Oh, belladonna! That stern stare — I hope that beautiful expression is the last sight I see in this cruel world!" he cried, but much to his disdain, you had already rounded the corner, completely done with his antics. "(Name)-channnn!~ Don't leave me hereeee!"

𝗦𝗪𝗘𝗘𝗧𝗜𝗘 ⋆ 𝗛𝗢𝗡𝗘𝗬 ⋆ 𝗪𝗜𝗙𝗘𝗬

It had been a strenuous day at the office for everyone, including you—a plethora of insane missions always followed by mountains of paperwork that never seemed to end. It was almost too much to bear. You huffed, leaning against your hand as you desperately tried to not fall asleep due to your exhaustion.

A pair of large, warm hands rested on your shoulders, massaging just the right spots in your taut muscles. You sighed, allowing yourself to lean back in your chair and enjoy the temporary reprieve. However, the owner of those hands had different plans, hot breath blowing against your ear as he bent down to rest his chin on your shoulder. Dazai chuckled to himself, enjoying your immediate reaction to straighten up, eyes pointed to the screen in an effort to avoid reacting.

You were just too cute.

He cooed out a plethora of sweet nothings in a low, hushed timbre as he tempted a flustered expression out of your face. And one thing that everyone should know about Osamu Dazai—he always gets what he wants when he puts his mind to it.

"Heyyy, sweetie. How's the paperwork going?" You continued to type. "Why won't you pay attention to me!" he wailed, wrapping his arms around your shoulders as he slumped against you. "Come onnn, honey. Don't you love me anymore?" You typed harder. He sniffled. "My little wifey doesn't love me anymore." You paused. "Whaat? Too forward?"

𝗕𝗘𝗔𝗨𝗧𝗜𝗙𝗨𝗟

Only strays wandered the streets at this time of night, but Dazai found himself itching to join them with each passing second. Sleep never easily came to the former demon prodigy. He found that each time he closed his eyes, he was only met with flashes of the past and disillusions of the future. His sharp mind would continue to turn like a machine, processing every granule of information as if he were inspecting an hourglass—a process that had become routine for him.

"Osamu..."

However, your intrusion into his nightfall rituals had soothed his instinctual aches. His eyes glazed over your drowsy figure, admiring the displacement of your hair and the heaviness of your eyes with an emotion he could only describe as awe.

Because in these moments, you didn't even have to be awake and looking at him to make him feel invigorated—feel alive. And with you, he didn't hate being alive anymore, didn't hate acknowledging his human flaws and issues. He just embraced it, even for only a second.

The rational part of his brain dissipated when he felt your warm, bare skin brush against his bandages, snuggling up to him. He knew his brain became useless in your presence, overcome with pure adulation for your mind, your body, and your very soul. So instead, he pulled you close, nuzzling his face in your neck and listening to the rhythmic pulse of your heart as it worked to soothe him to sleep.

"Good night, beautiful."

𝗖𝗛𝗨𝗨𝗬𝗔 𝗡𝗔𝗞𝗔𝗛𝗔𝗥𝗔 ⋆⁺₊ ⸺⸺⸺

𝗕𝗔𝗕𝗘

The murmurs of the restaurant had been dampened by a luxurious and vast velvet curtain, enclosing the entire booth to separate you from the other patrons. Lights sparkled from a dazzling chandelier, creating ribbons of gold and white on the tablecloth. This was a special occasion since you rarely had dates outside of your apartment. Chuuya always wanted to take you out more often, to show you off and treat you to the finest, but there never was time. So even when you insisted you could stay inside for a date this evening, he had already planned on spoiling you rotten.

He watched your expression between folded hands, hiding his smirk as the waiter set down an extremely expensive bottle of red wine. You had insisted on getting the more recent and cheaper version, not wanting to splurge too much—which, of course, insulted him. How could he not provide the best for his partner whenever he got the chance?

"Stop gaping, babe," he tutted at your widened eyes, tone lighter than the biting edge it usually held. "Whaddya say we snap over the 1959 Chateau Latour, hm?"

𝗗𝗢𝗟𝗟 ⋆ 𝗕𝗔𝗕𝗬

You had been working the late shift at your office building, slaving the day away only to come out on the other side with an aching back and a small paycheck. Despite Chuuya's suggestion that you could quit your job and let him take care of you, you wanted to maintain your independence and some additional money, which he understood. So here you were, trudging home from the train station with heavy feet and tired eyes. Seeing the apartment complex in the distance made your heart soar, a pep in your step as you started to practically glide down the sidewalk.

"Heyyyy, baby. Lookin' good tonight. That outfit for me, huh?"

Grimacing, you ignored the disgusting cat-calls from the random stranger in favor of increasing your speed to reach the building. You could practically smell the woody cologne coming from Chuuya's jacket, but your blissful thoughts were interrupted by a set of hefty footsteps behind you. This would've been normal during the day, but no one else is out this late at night—except one person.

With tremoring fingers, you lifted your cell phone ever-so-slightly, finding that strange man walking at a brisk pace behind you in the reflection. It set off too many alarm bells in your head, and your walking turned into sprinting.

It just so happened that Chuuya was leaning on one of the pillars outside of your apartment complex. He never liked when you worked the late-shift, and he definitely didn't like when you walked home by yourself—however, you had insisted that you would be fine. He relented, enjoying the independent aspect of your personality, but he still had his precautions.

He straightened up with a passive expression when he saw your shadowed silhouette in the distance, but his eyes narrowed, and his shoulders tensed once he spotted the man who was running after you. Using his gravity manipulation, he pulled you closer to him and had the pervert sink into the ground, sizing him up with burning eyes.

His gloved hand went to your back, easing your trembling body. "Go inside, baby. You don't need'ta be involved in this shit." He watched carefully as you rushed inside the lobby, before slamming the man onto the hard concrete, a foot digging into his spine. "Listen, shithead. You ever look at my doll again, I fucking swear to God—" He never let you walk home alone after this, not like you were complaining much. And that man would never bother you again, if he was even still capable of walking.

𝗣𝗥𝗜𝗡𝗖𝗘𝗦𝗦

It had been an absolutely draining day for Chuuya. With his position as an executive, you would assume that he wouldn't have to deal with the low-life freeloaders that the Port Mafia was bound to have, but it was exactly the opposite. He had been stuck for hours finishing a bunch of incident reports due to the destruction of properties on the southwestern side of Yokohama—incidents he was somehow not involved in.

He groaned as he entered the apartment, shrugging off his jacket and hanging it with his hat before a hearty aroma hit him. He followed his nose to the stove, finding an intricately wrapped dish with a note taped on top.

Make sure you eat before you go to bed. You need to grow big and strong. Love you! ♥

If it were from anyone else, he would've ripped the note apart when he hit the jab at his height—and he definitely scowled a bit—but there was a hint of endearance in his expression. He lifted the tin foil covering the food, feasting on the sight of penne alla vodka.

A raspy sound took him out of his ogling, his eyes scanning the darkened living room to find the one person he had been dying to see—you. And what a sight you were, drool trailed down your chin, a half-empty dish of pasta lying limply in your arms, and hair tousled as your neck bent at an awkward angle to rest against the cushions.

He couldn't help a small laugh at the sight, placing your plate on the coffee table and wiping the baby hairs out of your face, leaving a fleeting kiss on your forehead. In moments like this, with the disarray and train wreck his life had been, he found himself grateful for such simple, domestic sights. It enveloped him in a sense of peace, feeling at home for the first time.

"Hey, princess," he whispered with another peck to your temple. "I'm home."

𝗙𝗬𝗢𝗗𝗢𝗥 𝗗𝗢𝗦𝗧𝗢𝗘𝗩𝗦𝗞𝗬 ⋆⁺₊ ⸺⸺⸺

The pet names featured below are in Russian.

𝗗𝗘𝗔𝗥

Fyodor rarely, if ever, used nicknames of any kind in public. With his specific occupation, it would be detrimental to reveal any kind of attachment to anyone, regardless of whether you were capable of defending yourself. However, rarely does not mean never.

It was an unusual occasion; a completely public date at a local café—you knew that he loved his tea and suggested it in the off-chance that it would possibly sway him to join you. You assumed that he'd say no, but he always found himself having a hard time denying you when you proposed it so sweetly.

However, you knew that you needed to be efficient with your time. You enjoy each other's company in a secluded corner of the café while also multitasking on your own work. The room emitted a wonderful ambiance that made you feel productive and inspired, though it was simultaneously cozy enough to relax in—for you, that was. Most of Fyodor's work required him to be in seclusion, so instead he enjoyed the view—both of the skies outside and a couple of stray glimpses at you.

"Drink for (Name)," a barista called.

Fyodor looked toward you expectantly, but you were far too in your own little world to notice. He would've normally broken your workflow, but he found himself oddly compelled to let you continue—he was awfully fond of the way your brows narrowed as you concentrated. So instead, he retrieved your drink, settling it on the table with a small clink.

"Here you are, dear."

𝗠𝗜𝗟𝗔𝗬𝗔 (милая) ⋆ 𝗥𝗔𝗗𝗡𝗔𝗬𝗔 (радная) ⋆ 𝗟𝗨𝗕𝗜𝗠𝗔𝗬𝗔 (любимая)

It was in the privacy of your shared home that his native tongue came out, engrossing you with his rich Russian accent—he knew the effect it had on you, so sometimes he toyed around with you by slipping it into everyday interactions.

You walked into his computer room, careful to not trip on wires as you carried in a steaming thermal mug of fresh black tea. He was often far too engrossed in his work to eat or drink, so you found the least you could do was to make him some tea whenever you weren't busy.

You placed it next to him, leaning over to take a curious glance at the screen—not understanding a word of it—and you were about to silently exit when he placed a cold hand on top of yours. Your brow raised, watching the smile that appeared on his lips.

"Thank you, милая." You sputtered over your words at the praise, watching in anticipation as he took a sip. He hummed at the nectarous flavor, slouching as the tea worked to soothe his throat. The tea circled in the mug as he swirled it, watching carefully as he could feel your composure melt away. "Delicious as always, радная." You mumbled a quick thank you, turning like a gazelle on your heel to escape his predatory gaze, but his hand pulled you back. Completely captive in his hold, you looked back, a knowing smirk on his face. "Stay for a moment, любимая. I'd like to hear your thoughts on something."

𝗠𝗬𝗦𝗛𝗞𝗔 (мышка)

You honestly had no clue how you had gotten into this position.

One moment, you were cleaning around various rooms, making sure everything was dusted and organized. The next, you were sitting in Fyodor's lap—though you couldn't say you minded. An occasional hum vibrated against the top of your head as Fyodor concentrated on a book in one hand, the other fastened securely around your waist, rubbing circles into the clothed skin.

It took every ounce of self-control you had to limit your face to a neutral glance, staring at the words in his Russian novel as if you were trying to decipher them—you were; you didn't know a lick of the language. You leaned against his shoulder, listening to the faint thump of his heartbeat as it lured you into relaxation. His eyes began to drift from the page, finding your internal struggle incredibly amusing. He titled his face, holding back a smirk when you made a startled noise from a kiss to the temple.

Cute.

In these moments, he felt human again. Everywhere else in the world, he was either treated as a god or a demon—and that was the way he had orchestrated it. But here, in the home you both created, he felt that he had finally received his sanctuary. A place where he sat, welcomed and unjudged for his sins.

"You're quite warm, мышка," he teased. "Perhaps you are developing fever. Hm?"

𝗡𝗜𝗞𝗢𝗟𝗔𝗜 𝗚𝗢𝗚𝗢𝗟 ⋆⁺₊ ⸺⸺⸺

The pet names featured below are in Ukrainian.

𝗟𝗔𝗦𝗧𝗜𝗩𝗞𝗔 (ластівка)

The fluorescent lights above burned your eyes as you scoured the aisles of the store aimlessly. You were on your weekly grocery run but had decided to make something different for dinner this week. There was only one problem—you didn't know where the ingredients were. You normally would've just asked one of the staff members, but you had unfortunately come into the store at a very late hour. Every time you looked at an employee, their eyes were glazed over as if wishing for the sweet release of death. So you decided to search on your own.

You scanned the shelves for a particular dressing, not finding it in its usual spot. It was only with a quick glance to the top shelf that you found it, teetering on the edge as if tempting you. Gritting your teeth, you outstretched your arm as you braced your other one on a lower shelf, only to shriek at the feeling of two hands supporting your hips. You whipped around to find the pervert who had touched you but found nothing. And then you looked down.

Damn him.

Two familiar gloves emerged from golden portals, and a mischievous chuckle accompanied their exit from down the aisle. You looked the white-haired jester up and down, crossing your arms with a pout.

"Did you have to startle me like that?" "Ohhh, sorry, ластівка," he cooed. "I only want to say hello!~"

𝗠𝗔𝗟𝗘𝗡𝗞𝗔 𝗠𝗢𝗬𝗔 (маленька моя) ⋆ 𝗠𝗢𝗬𝗔 𝗞𝗢𝗞𝗛𝗔𝗡𝗔 (моя кохана)

How did you manage to get into this mess?

Oh yeah, Nikolai suggested it.

The classic jester, in his hobby of wreaking havoc everywhere he goes, suggested a fun date-night idea—to light bin fires around the alleys of Yokohama until the police caught on. At first, you had been chasing after him in an attempt to stop him, but it had all been in vain. He would let you grab him, only to chuckle as he teleported away with his cape. So instead, you opted to stick by his side and make sure he didn't cause too much harm.

You stood a couple of feet away from the blazing fire, your body resting in the tranquil glow of the chaotic light. Despite the oddities that came with the situation—and every situation that involved Nikolai—there was something so welcoming about the discord. Perhaps you had finally become used to Nikolai's antics. The aforementioned jester had been gaping at you for some time, an unreadable expression on his face as he watched your features through the fire.

"You look breathtaking in the glow of a flame, маленька моя."You stilled at his serious tone, fumbling over a response, but a crescendoing wail of sirens broke the silence. Nikolai smirked, grabbing your arm with one hand as the other went into his overcoat. "Oops!~ Looks like the police caught on. Come on, моя кохана! This way!"

𝗗𝗨𝗦𝗛𝗔 𝗠𝗢𝗬𝗔 (душа моя)

A refreshing breeze rushed past your face as you settled, watching the sun make its descent below the horizon of the city's harbor. Your legs dangled dangerously over the edge of a steep cliffside, yet you found no fear remaining in your heart. Perhaps you have become accustomed to a life of chaos; find beauty in the entropy and contradictions of life.

Nikolai couldn't help but stare at your face as it was outlined by the shadows of the dying sunbeams, awe-struck by your beauty. You were ethereal to him, everything he ever wanted to be and wished to have—so grounded and yet freer than ever. He knew that the relationship between you two, something neither of you had dared to label, should've made him feel constricted. It tied him down to the ground, and he should've been fighting for the skies.

But he didn't.

He felt free. And he knew that it was most likely his heart tricking him, stringing him to a relationship that would disappear with the wind—that he had truly become the fool everyone thought of him as. But he didn't care. Not anymore. Not with you by his side.

He snapped out of his philosophical contemplation as a soft hand cupped his cheek, thumbing at the performative mask that he wore. And he folded it like a deck of cards, removing it before placing a chaste kiss on your palm.

"Somehow, I feel freer than ever before. And it's all thanks to you, душа моя."

𝗦𝗜𝗚𝗠𝗔 ⋆⁺₊ ⸺⸺⸺

𝗗𝗘𝗔𝗥 ⋆ 𝗗𝗘𝗔𝗥𝗘𝗦𝗧

It was a known fact that the Casino's manager had a rigid schedule, packed with meetings and event dates that he had to prepare for. Everything had to run perfectly inside his casino, and he would be damned if it didn't. However, Sigma always made it a mission to purposefully bump into you throughout the day. He had memorized your schedule easily, finding that there was only so much you could do in a finite building in the sky.

He would often find you either in the library or viewing deck, either in your own world reading a book or watching the real world from the skies. Even he had to admit that he could never get tired of the sight of the Earth from down below, contemplating the lives of those who lived on the ground.

"Good morning, dear," he greeted you at the entrance of the viewing deck, noticing a stack of books in your arms. "I see your trip to the library went well." "It was. I'm going to thumb through the newest shipment of fiction novels this afternoon," you replied, your hand already tapping on one of the hardcovers in anticipation. Sigma always made sure to buy the best books for the casino, and you knew he was often swayed by your own favorites. "I'm glad you're so interested in them." He knowingly smiled before a memory came to mind. "Could you hold off your reading for one moment, dearest? I've received a new layout for our casino's fliers and was hoping you'd take a look."

𝗟𝗢𝗩𝗘 ⋆ 𝗟𝗢𝗩𝗘𝗟𝗬 ⋆ 𝗦𝗪𝗘𝗘𝗧𝗛𝗘𝗔𝗥𝗧

The anxious casino manager often forgot to eat because of his destructive work habits, often going hours without consuming anything in order to constantly maintain peace in his casino. It was a terrible habit that caused more stress for both of you, so you decided to enact a plan. Whenever you noticed his workload was becoming too much or he seemed too frazzled, you'd step in to make sure he was getting everything he needed.

A small (underlying word: large) part of him secretly reveled in this, both having the opportunity to be doted on—and be simultaneously scolded—while also relishing in a couple stress-free moments with you. And he also gets to enjoy your cooking, which he personally found better than the casino chefs'—but that's because he was biased.

On his worst days, you'd prance into his office after the casino lunch rush, carrying in tow a small bento packed with his favorite comfort foods and a cookie for dessert. He would look up from whatever paperwork he was slaving away on, a small smile on his tired face.

"Thank you, my love." "You really need to eat more, Sigma," you lectured, placing the bento on his desk to take his face into your hands, analyzing his eye-bags with a concerned expression. "You're gonna get sick." "I'm fine, lovely," he replied, cupping your hands with his own. "You don't need to worry about me." You struck him with a pointed glare, crossing your arms and tapping your foot as he began to work on paperwork again. The clock ticked by a couple of seconds, your maternal scowl deepening with each moment that passed where he didn't reach for the food. "Sweetheart," he sighed before relenting and reaching for the bento. "Fine. For you, I'll eat some. But only until C4276 finishes his blackjack game."

𝗟𝗢𝗩𝗘 𝗢𝗙 𝗠𝗬 𝗟𝗜𝗙𝗘

The casino had been blasting with the sounds of the band in full swing long into the night, people dancing and chatting amongst themselves as the casino reached the peak of its ability. This new gala had been an exhilarating success, drawing in new patrons as cash flowed out from dealers' hands. It had been perfect, but it was obviously a lot on Sigma.

That was the reason you insisted on co-hosting it with him. He watched in amazement as you worked the crowd tonight, acting in concert to keep the patrons happy and to maintain order. You had been his perfect match, which showed just how much you watched over the casino.

He found you later that night standing on your private balcony, pausing at the entry to fully take in how beautiful you looked in your formal ensemble. The stars seemed to drift to your body like a satellite, casting you in a distant heavenly glow. But everything was silent as if you two were the only ones left to watch over the world as the clouds wandered by.

The anxiety and fear he always felt had been pushed to the side, melting away with the utter sense of belonging that you had engrained into him. You had shown him that he wasn't a mediocre man but a capable and strong individual capable of loving and being loved. You turned as the balcony door shifted open, welcoming him into both your arms and heart.

And he fell for you even more.

"Ohh, love of my life," he mumbled, nuzzled into your shoulder. "What would I be without you?"

милая = dear/darling радная = dear любимая = beloved мышка = mouse ластівка = swallow (bird) маленька моя = my little one моя кохана = my love душа моя = my soul

TAGLIST: @imhandicapableofmath @seisitive @solandiss @ruru-kiss @sillyspookycat @kotysluny

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nicxl333 · 1 year ago

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NSFW ALPHABET— ITOSHI SAE

depending on how this does i’ll continue this as a blue lock series :)

this is based on my opinion and also egoist bible facts about sae (hopefully it’s accurate enough)

A= Aftercare (what they're like after the act)

even though he may not seem like it, sae is very soft when it comes to you. your legs are aching? best believe he'll massage them. his first instinct would be to draw a bath for the both of you, cleaning you up so you don't have to do so much as lifting a finger. after all, it was him who put you in this state. after you're both clean he'd put you to bed, wrapping his arm around you and pulling you into his chest where you both eventually fall asleep.

B= Body part (favorite body part their own or their lovers)

on himself, probably his thighs. they are impressively toned and a perfect spot for you to hold onto when pleasing him so it's only natural that he takes pride in them. on you? ass. (canon) in his opinion, there's no ass that compares to yours and he'll quite literally do anything in his power to see it move. if you wear booty shorts around the house best believe he's grabbing it. he also definitely has a hidden folder on his phone filled with ass pics from you for when he's abroad for football.

C= Cum (anything that has to do with it)

if you guys are doing it in doggy, he'll take the opportunity to cum on your ass. either that or inside you. he likes the risk, even though you're on birth control.

D= Dirty secret (Pretty self explanatory)

he got wound up post game one day and took it upon himself to fuck his fist to the thought of you. specifically you last week being fucked by him in a state of overstimulation after he'd already made you cum twice on his fingers alone. that isn't the thing that makes this a secret he'll never share however. once he'd cum sticky ropes into his hand he reached for his phone and snapped a picture to send to you. but, in his post orgasmic state he misclicked and sent the photo to the one person he tended to avoid the most: shidou ryusei

sure, he could've deleted it and avoided the most embarrassing moment of his life, but, with shidou being the most desperate male he's ever seen of course he'd view it immediately, given the fact that sae never contacts him.

long story short shidou sent a surprise of his own and sae in a state of absolute rage made him swear to secrecy if he valued living.

E= Experience (do they know what they're doing)

sae doesn't know anything apart from soccer, so it's safe to say that he was clueless about anything sex related. doesn't mean he didn't learn though. you were also each other's first.

nowadays it's questionable if you were really his first and only lover the way he fucks you with such expertise.

F= Favorite position

anything where he can see your ass clapping with each snap of his hips. doggy style, reverse cowgirl, leap frog, the snake. he's not very particulate on just one.

however, if he's making love to you, it needs to be in missionary. he wants you to know just how much he loves you with each roll of his hips into you. it's also a way for him to feed off your reactions in such an intimate setting.

G= Goofy (how serious are they)

this is sae itoshi we're talking about. i can guarantee you whenever you fuck it will be a serious moment. that doesn't mean he won't tease you every once in a while though to stroke his ego. he is a massive egoist after all.

expect lines such as "you're about to cum again? i'm not even halfway through with you and you're already crumbling." or "stop holding back. just let me make you cum, it's not like you can do it on your own anyways. need me to do everything for you.”

H= Hair (grooming habits)

sae is the type of guy to stay well groomed. be it shaved completely or short wisps of hair that re uniformly trimmed.

I= Intimacy (in the moment romantic or rough/ dirty)

he is away a lot, given the fact he's an internationally famous soccer player, so he most likely doesn't have enough time to always ensure the most romantic settings for you, resulting in many heated quickies. when the football season is over however and he has a lot of free time on his hands, expect lots of beautifully expensive dates which almost always end up in passionate sessions of love making.

he may not always show it, but sae really does love you so much, more than you can ever imagine, and the best way of showing it in his eyes is giving you endless pleasure so you can fully feel the effects of his love (mentally and physically if you catch my drift).

J= Jack off (do they masturbate and how often)

you have him constantly hard on the regular, whether you're with him or not (not that he'd ever let you know the power you hold over him) and he finds his hand wrapped around his dick more often than not. before practice, during practice games, when you're with him. just the mere thought of you is enough for him to spring a massive boner that has to be dealt with at least once every two days. other days he'll either pray that no one sees or take a cold shower.

K= Kink (kinks what they like possibly unusual)

dumbification. easily top of the board. he likes to see you completely lose yourself on his dick, fucked into total submission, to which he'd respond with a snarky comment.

"have i fucked you stupid? going dumb on my cock huh? i think you can take one more, can you do that for me? yeah?"

dacryphillia (in the good sense). he likes to see tears prick at the corner of your eyes due to how good he is fucking you. he'll reach down and wipe your tears away

"is it too much huh? don't worry baby it's okay i’ve got you"

L= Location (where they like to get it on)

as horny as sae gets he does have some form of rationality. given the fact he's bombarded by paparazzi a lot he wouldn't like to risk the both of you being next day headliners across the globe for something so unsavoury in their eyes.

he would fuck you most likely in the comfort of your shared condo or the safety of your hotel room if you have decided to travel with him.

M= Motivation (things that makes them tick/ turn ons)

it's you. you don't have to do a lot to turn this man on, just your sweet voice is enough or your bright smile.

if he had to choose however, probably seeing your ass in a nice pair of shorts. specifically if you’re bent over cleaning or picking something up, to the point where he can see your ass peaking out.

N= No (turnoffs or absolutely won't do)

threesomes. he is way too possessive (in a good way) and full of love for you that he'd refuse to see anyone other than himself please you. he believes he's more than capable of doing that himself.

bring it up to him one day and he will shut it down immediately, no fucks given.

O= Oral (receiving or giving and how skillful they are)

definitely giving, although he wouldn't say he doesn't enjoy being on the receiving end every once in a while, particularly after a stressful day.

this guy is the absolute king at eating pussy, sucking on your clit while fingering you with curled fingers to hit your g-spot with each stroke. it's something about seeing you in total ecstasy because of him that really feeds into his ego.

P= Pace (how fast they are)

if you guys are fucking, hard and fast. he knows all the spots that make you scream so he's pretty skilled at bringing you to a quick earth shattering orgasm every time.

if you're making love, slow and deep. he wants you to feel every inch and every vein of him. he particularly enjoys the sweet whines you let out in his ear when he hits it just right.

Q= Quickie (do they prefer fast and hard)

like said earlier, he doesn't always have a lot of free time to spend with you so always expect a quickie if he's only there for a day or so. it would be wrong to say he prefers it however because if he did have the time, he would spend it pulling orgasm after orgasm out of you.

R= Risk (do they like to try new things)

as long as they're reasonable. if he doesn't feel comfortable or confident with it he'll make it known to you. he is open to some suggestions though. particularly degradation if you’re up for it.

S= Stamina (how many times they can go and how long each round lasts)

bffr. for starters he's a literal football player. this man spends almost every day of his career running up and down a massive pitch for a minimum of 90 minutes. best believe his stamina is absolutely god tier.

if he does have the time for it, expect 3-4 rounds of him going absolutely ham on you.

T= Toys (are they game for using sex toys on themselves or lovers)

funny story. the first time he walked in on you using a vibrator on yourself he demanded the name of where you got it from, then finished you off with the toy, then himself straight after. it was the first time he got you to squirt.

the next time you saw him he had a box full of sex toys for him to test out on you. it was a long, pleasurable night.

U= Unfair (how do they tease or do they enjoy suspense themselves)

he does enjoy opportunities given to make you beg for his dick. methods such as pulling out once he feels the signals of your orgasm coming, letting the heat inside you die down before he fucks into you again and repeats the process once more.

V= Volume (are they loud, what sounds, and do they talk)

nah. he's pretty quiet as it is so expect small grunts in your ear, or slight panting from exertion. don’t get him wrong though, he will tease the shit out of you if necessary. you on the other hand, are very loud, which he relishes in. your sweet sounds are a need for him in order to cum.

W= Wild card (random sincannon of any sort)

as much as he hates threesomes i think he'd want to fuck you in front of shidou. not to the point where he can see your body, but so much so that he knows what's going on.

eg: you're sitting on his lap, wearing a skirt, where his dick can easily access your tight cunt. he'd probably engage in some conversation while he bounces you in his lap so he can show shidou just who you belong to.

X= X-ray (what's down below in dem pants)

easy. he's big in both sectors. he's very girthy, meaning you're stuffed to the brim each time he takes you. equally he's got a decent length, 7.2 inches, slightly curved to the right. the tip is quite an angry shade of pink while the rest of his dick is pinkish light brown. (#ca9f94 for reference) he deffo has a big vein running underneath which you do well to lick at every time you give him head, and his tip is definitely extremely sensitive.

lick the hole of his tip and he's cumming instantaneously.

Y= Yearning (sexdrive level)

due to extended periods of time away from each other his sexdrive is on an all time high. when he's with you it's gotta be at least once a day y'all go at it.

don't think yours isn't just as high though, he can barely walk through the front door before you're pawing at his clothes in desperation to take them off.

Z= Zzzz (do they sleep after if so how quickly after)

he's an athlete, it's mandatory that he gets some form of rest. he most likely falls asleep with you or just after you, softly stroking your hair or caressing your waist gently, before giving you a peck to the forehead and drifting off.

#anime #blue lock #sae x reader smut #sae x reader #sae itoshi x reader #sae #itoshi smut #blue lock sae itoshi #itoshi sae #itoshi brothers #bluelock smut #nicxl333writes #nicxl333

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arenabreadandbiscuits · 3 months ago

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Writer In Need! - Writing & Art Commissions Available, Please Read The Whole Post And Vote To Help Me!

My mom has been admitted into the hospital today.

Hey guys, serious post so please treat it as such but genuinely I need commissions. I'm currently at the hospital with my mom and I won't bore any of you anymore with the many issues I have but commissions would be both helpful on her to help pay for things that's are more low priority while bigger money is dealt for bigger things. Nonetheless my point is commissions are open. I'll draw but pieces take longer but I am happy to do Hazbin Hotel, Demon Slayer, and various OCS no matter where they're from so please just ask me.

Hazbin is my biggest fandom right now so I prefer working in that fandom but I can hear others out. I'm a part of quite a few.

Though I can draw I do prefer more writing commissions over other things so please ask for those. At the top of my page it mentions what I will and won't do so please refer to it but I'll write cc x cc, OC x cc, OC x OC, angst, smut, fluff, 3k, 6k, 10k words... Just please look at my account and read everything before commissioning ANYTHING.

I will only take payment as Cash app, Chime, and/or Venmo but I'd really just like to have the money for peace of mind. Don't pm me with offers of other things... 'sugar daddy' looking for a baby desperate for help? Please stay away from me. I ONLY want genuine commissioners and if you choose to be one I will talk to you fully about your commission to make sure I get all the right info and actually start your story if you send full/half pay.

It's just... I'm going through so much. I hate having to ask the Internet for help because sometimes people don't listen and offer times they don't care but bless any soul out there who reads this and bless your life if you decide to actually commission me in this time of need.

I'm putting a poll for interaction to hopefully actually get commissioners. I usually beg people who aren't serious to not vote but sometimes people enjoy getting others hopes up so I know most likely it'll still occur but I have to try. I think maybe months ago I made a goal to see if I could reach 400 dollars just from commissions. It'll take work but work that I will and have to accept.

Here's some pictures of me currently at the hospital because I know people don't really listen to these things when they don't trust them and that's smart and completely fair.

I have videos as well but here's just a couple. Once again I'm looking for serious commissions. Want a 4k, 5k, 8k(?!) story of your OC smashing Lucifer I'll do it just please give me your money. I'm desperate and my mentally is trying to keep stable so please gods and goddesses let people see and be serious about this post like I'm begging for them to be.

Here's the poll

Please don't vote if you aren't going to do one of these two things. I'm in genuine need of help again and I'm hoping this works this time because it hasn't in a while now.. I have many examples of writing on this account though I'm aware I need to make another master list..

I'm also more than happy to write and/do art for:

Obey Me

The Arcana

Stardew Valley

Harvest Town

Dislyte (specifically writing since I haven't practiced my art style with them)

Demon Slayer

Tokyo Revengers

Possibly more...

If you've voted or you're a commissioner looking to give me work, thank you. I'm happy you're here and hopefully.. you enjoy your stay here while you have it. Honestly if I don't get commissions after this post I just honestly don't know what I can do.

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heartsteellerr · 10 months ago

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How they comfort you during a scandal

Request; Hi! I see that you’re requests are open! Can I get a reaction of Heartsteel member’s s/o feeling insecure about dating a celebrity, seeing false dating rumors about the members they are dating and just generally worried about idol scandal stuff because of them? how would the member comfort them about it? A/N ✎: Hi nonnie!! Sorry this request was taking FOREVER for me to do but 🙏 I got some of it done! I decided to split the request into parts for (partly) MY SAKE cos lately i've been busy and I didn't exactly want to prolong it, and also because I didn't want the post to be that long?? So hopefully you're fine with that! Enjoy! Content; Hurt/Comfort, leaning more towards hurt Warnings; GN reader, reader isn't an idol Characters; Ezreal and Kayn

It's honestly on him for not being discreet about your relationship, or 'the' relationship that no one knew about (aside from the other Heartsteel members) until a photo leaked of him with someone. He didn't seem to mind it though, brushing it off as something that'll soon blow over eventually with the media news. But you on the other hand, did in fact mind it ⎯ more than him actually. As you weren't a famous, sensational popstar like he was or had any social status within the media, you were just... Someone standing beside him, and that sort of mindset grew onto you the more you looked into the false dating rumors circulating around him. Seeing the pictures of numerous celebrities that people speculated were in the photo with him and then comparing yourself to them, or the way some fans were picking apart the 'mysterious partner' as someone not worthy of being with their bias, or⎯ but then your phone gets snatched right out of your hand. Taken and tossed aside as he held you in his arms.

Ezreal

He'd be pissed at himself for being so careless and even more pissed at seeing you degrade yourself when he loves you so. No words can properly explain how he feels in that moment, or how he wants to convey that he was a big giant idiot for not taking your feelings into account ⎯ but with the way he held onto you, unmoving and refusing to let go so you wouldn't be able to see his face, it's clear how much he regrets putting you in this position.

In a way, it's almost laughable to him how you'd think of yourself as unworthy of him when that's how he feels when he's with you. Idol or not, you can easily express yourself without a care of the media attacking or slandering you for your comments, or the way you dress comfortably for yourself and no one else, even the littlest details about you were so... loveable to him, that he does find himself to be a bit envious of you sometimes.

How he chooses to handle the scandal will depend on what you also want him to do; ideally he'd want to make it public that he's taken but won't (ever) be revealing his partner's identity for personal reasons (obviously) and would make a serious comment that the public and his fans shouldn't dictate who he dates ⎯ it's for him to decide, and the person he chose is you.

Kayn

He's an idiot. He'll say it out loud and not-so proud for the whole world and even the media to hear because truly, thats who he is. He really didn't see that this whole thing would blow up in his face, especially when he was so in the moment of loving you to even notice the backlash he'll be getting ⎯ which, incidentally, was totally and completely on his part. But could you really fault him for it? Somewhat. BUT in his defence it genuinely felt that way, like being with you for hours when it only felt like minutes for him.

He'd say something like how you made him feel like a normal human being instead of a freak, or an idol put on a pedestal by his fan ⎯ and even though it was good at first, it limits so much things he wants to do. An easy example: Loving you.

Again (like Ezreal) when he makes his statement to the public it also includes what you want him to do with your relationship; he can come out public with it or keep it under wraps, saying everything was false, all while making sure his anger was very present ⎯ because for one, how dare they butt into his business and two, for making you think so lowly of yourself.

#heartsteel x reader #ezreal x reader #kayn x reader

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ideasarestuckinmyhead · 4 months ago

Note

Faust with a Star who's an artist and asks him to pose for drawings (HCs/Short Story, whichever works for you!!)

Draw me like one of your French girls!

Bc of how cute this idea was I made it both <33

Loves being your model, doing poses you need with ease as you sketch it quickly

Honestly if you called him your muse he's giggling while telling you to stop (continue doing it he loves it so much)

If you need a specific pose he let's you move his body as you want it

Also 100% down changing outfits if you need to use them as a reference as well, he's basically Barbie with how many outfits he'll change in to

Makes silly jokes about the titanic how he's the Rose to your Jack.

When you finish the work he asks if he could post and brag about his awesome artist partner!

If you posted it already he's sharing it to all his social media platforms. Giggling as everyone complements how amazing it is

During streams he always talks about how you drew him again saying how loved he is by a artist.

"Like this?" Asking as he posed in front of Star. Looking at them with a soft smile, relaxing into the couch he lounged on. Faust's partner turned their head and smiled at the pose.

"Perfect! Your such an amazing poser! My muse!" Praising him, Star grabbed their pencil and started to sketch the base of how his body in on the couch. Preening Faust giggles hearing the nickname he loved so much.

"Is this for another commission?" Questioning, Faust watched as his artist's hand flys across the canvas. Quickly capturing how the pose is, he always loved seeing them work. It was like magic how they formed a blank surface into art.

"Yep! Red, is what he said to call him wanted an exact picture to that of Rose from the titanic. But it would be his partner." Mumbling Star's eyes shifted back and forth. From to canvas at their side to Faust posing in front of them so perfectly.

"Oh? Even naked? How scandalous~" Giggling as he wiggled his eye brows. Causing Star to snort at him, but then nodded as they recall the commission agreement.

"I know right? He got consent from his partner to send me a nude picture. Hopefully I do it justice!" Sighing out, Star remembered the first commission they did with a naked model. "I swear if I butcher it I'll quit art."

Faust pouted at that, but then remembered how distraught Star was when the commission was turned down. They tried redoing it multiple times but the commissioner just didn't like it. Huffing out Faust turned his head to them and spoke.

"Well if that person wasn't sooo picky! You wouldn't have felt bad. You redid it like....a thousand times! Honestly I wonder if they were just trolling you...." Mumbling out the last part, Faust saw Star shaking their head. Causing him to roll his eyes, Faust wishes they could see how their art was perfect and amazing.

"But still, I only need the pose then I can work from there. You wanna watch me work again? Might take longer than expected." Whispering as they focused on the canvas. Letting Faust think it over then sighing at them, shaking his head slightly.

"Can't there's this new game out I got sponsored for to play and I gotta do that before it'd deadline. Maybe when your done with this commission we can play together?" Asking hopefully, Star was on a break from gaming. To focus on finishing the few commissions they landed. Once again his partner shook their head, giving him a sad smile.

"I'm sorry muse, but I'll make it up by playing with you on Friday. I wanna focus on this commission. Don't worry I won't push myself that far." Giggling out the last bit. However Faust gave them a look, to be serious about the breaks and not pushing too far.

"I swear if you accidently don't eat for a day like last time and get sick. I'm killing you. With love of course." Smiling innocently as he batted his lashes. Star nodded at their partner, better to agree or it'll be a long conversation.

"Of course my muse, my moon, love of my life-" Babbling nicknames for him, Faust gave them another look to stop talking or they'll focus on praising him.

"Oops! Well, I'll sing your praises another day. Now, let me fix your pose real quick I think you moved a bit too much." Mumbling out as Star got up and tweaked with the pose a bit.

#red rants #yuurivoice #red answers #yuurivoice faust #red writes

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unholydeukae · 3 months ago

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Hi hello how are you? I hope you are doing alright.

I'm not sure if you will do this one but do you think you could write anything about a reader, who has sexual trauma, wanting to take that step with their Dreamcatcher GF? I'm not sure if this is allowed to be asked. I read the "will not write" list but I wasn't sure if this counted under the noncon no's...

If you won't write this one, I understand

Hello anonie :) your request is absolutely fine, no worries! We say that we don't write non-con and made that post because we don't want to write the members as neither sexual predators nor victims of SA, but your ask doesn't include that, so you're all good!!

I hope you like it 🫶🏼

JiU:

Upon hearing about the trauma, she keeps calm to the outside but is boiling inside

If she ever sees that person in real life she definitely needs a good alibi, because there will be blood (hopefully not literally)

She never pushes anything sexually of course, even makes sure you’re okay before she pecks your lips

Since she’s a service top often, she listens to everything you say and ask her to do very attentively and doesn’t rush anything

The thought of taking the lead doesn’t even cross her mind, she simply does what you tell her and stops at the slightest sign of discomfort

SuA:

She definitely doesn’t keep calm on the outside when she hears about it

It wouldn’t have taken much more for her to run outside to find the person and slap them in the face (in her imagination - in real life she’s all bark no bite but that doesn’t make her reaction less strong and valid)

Tears of anger run down her face and she nearly starts yelling at the monster that did those things to you, despite them obviously not being there with you

Touching others is a difficult thing for you because of what happened to you, but her clear instructions help you a lot and you never feel pushed about anything

It’s very important for her that you never feel like it’s a problem if you can’t or don’t want to do something and that you never ever have to feel bad for stopping, even as the top

Siyeon:

When you tell her she looks at you blankly for a moment, struggling to process that someone would actually do something so awful to you

Upon realizing she’s so worried she’ll hurt you that she holds your hands tightly between hers and repeats a hundred times that you didn’t deserve that and that she’ll never do something like that to you because you’re the most precious person to her

(also, if she ever accidentally crosses that person’s way, she’ll definitely be tempted to make it look like an accident)

She always thought it’d be an amazing experience to make you feel good and while it still is, she’s also very scared to hurt you

Everything goes very slowly over the span of days and weeks until she even touches your bare chest, because nothing would destroy her more than be too rough and hurt you even more

Handong:

As soon as you tell her you want to talk to her, she shifts into her serious mode and listens attentively, but despite her best efforts to be solid as a rock for you, her eyes widen when you tell her everything (and the gears in her mind start shifting if she should maybe do some undercover digital psycho terror)

Feeling her arms around you as you quietly cry into her shoulder is all you need in that moment

When one day you tell her you want to go further than kissing, she asks once if you’re sure but doesn’t repeatedly ask again to not make you insecure about your decision

She asks you for some time and after cooking dinner for you, you walk into a decorated bedroom, candles burning that emit a relaxing scent and rose petals on the bed

During all of it she makes sure that everything is slow and gentle and is assertive to any signs of you being uncomfortable, not wanting you to think she wouldn’t care about you enough

Yoohyeon:

When you tell her about it, she freezes first, then starts bawling her eyes out until she’s calmed down enough to listen intently to what you say

She feels really helpless and doesn’t know how to support you because she thinks holding you and listening to you and making sure you feel valid is not enough

(You tell her that it is but she doesn’t believe you)

Your wish to take things further makes her be a little bit panicky and anxious, she’s really worried she’ll accidentally make everything worse

Checking in what feels like every five seconds is nearly a bit much for you but you know she does it with the best intentions possible, so you’re more than fine to give her what she needs

Dami:

Probably the most collected reaction, together with Handong

Hot chocolate is prepared when you tell her you want to talk about something and she listens quietly the whole time, only rubbing your hand or drying your tears when necessary

After you’re done explaining and getting some cuddles, she asks how you would like to proceed regarding sex

You two talk about boundaries, yes’s and no’s intensely and agree upon the light system and two nonverbal safewords just in case

So once you actually decide to take the next step with her, it goes very smoothly and you feel safe at all times, not doubting a second that she would react immediately once you put a stop to it

Gahyun:

Cries with you at first when you tell her, then gets angry and wants the person’s name and address but you calm her down quickly

Tells you that she’s more than okay with it if you don’t want to do any sexual stuff at all or for as long as you’re not comfortable

After the conversation, she collects a ton of information online and in books, doing a lot of research about both the best ways to go on about such an experience when it comes to sex and the psychological aspects of it

She’s actually the one to approach you about how to continue, suggesting and explaining things she found out and asks about your opinion and stance about it all

You’re so touched that she did so much research that it’s easy to relax enough with her - she made it very clear how much she wants the experience to be the best for you

#dreamcatcher #dreamcatcher smut #dreamcatcher fluff #deukae smut #dreamcatcher x reader #jiu #sua #siyeon #handong #yoohyeon #dami #gahyun #admin ☀️

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loucifersbitch · 1 month ago

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I think I'm more eagerly awaiting the full thing and hopefully your words come easily so you can post it so us heathens can read it:

🪑🪑🪑🪑🪑🪑🪑🪑🪑🪑🪑🪑🪑🪑🪑 (There are 15 there)

i've almost finished the second chapter, so we're getting there lol. (majority of this one is under the cut for language/the beginnings of kink negotiation)

Well, at least it's not an immediate, flat-out no.

"You could make it up to me by fucking me while Tommy watches."

"Okay, I thought that was what you said. Uh," his eyes flicked over to Tommy before settling on Evan once again, "can I ask why?"

"It's a kink we've been wanting to try. Together," Evan explained. "Tommy would sit in a chair in the corner and only be allowed to watch. He wouldn't get to touch me or you for the duration. In fact," he paused, looking at Tommy with that dangerous glint in his eye, "he'll be tied to the chair with a gag in his mouth. So all he'll be able to do is watch."

Eddie's mouth opened on a silent, "Oh," and he shifted in his seat.

"So you," he turned to Tommy, "y-you want this? You want to be a - what's even the word?"

"Cuck," Evan provided helpfully.

"A cuck, yeah. You want that? Isn't that kind of degrading?"

Tommy swallowed with a click.

"I mean, in theory it's what I want. I've never had the opportunity to find out if I enjoy it as much as I think I will. But Evan has been nothing but supportive of trying new things with me. And as far as degradation, it's - honestly, that's part of the appeal."

"Huh."

"What 'huh'?" Evan asked, offended on Tommy's behalf.

"No, it's not bad," Eddie hurried to explain. "I just never would've pegged you as - well -"

"As a submissive who wants their partner to degrade them and fuck others in front of them?" Tommy asked, smirking.

"Well, yeah. Kinda."

"Technically I'm a switch. I enjoy subbing or domming depending on what my partner wants."

"Same," Evan added.

"But seeing Evan fucking or getting fucked by someone just sounds -" he blew out a heavy breath, "- really fucking hot."

Evan grabbed his hand and smiled, supportive as always.

"You're actually - you two are actually serious about this," Eddie said, his eyebrows shooting up.

"We are," Evan nodded.

"But uh," Eddie laughed self-consciously, rubbing the back of his neck, "why me? Aren't there like a ton of guys you could get to do this?"

Tommy slapped a hand over Evan's mouth before he could tell Eddie it was because Tommy came harder than he had in years at just the mention of his name.

"We need it to be someone we know and trust. Someone who won't judge us or try to come between us," Tommy said.

"But," Evan mumbled before finally shoving Tommy's hand down and off of his mouth, "it's only going to work if you're comfortable with it. I know we haven't talked about the whole sexuality -" he flapped his hand noncommittally "- thing aside from you not having feelings for Tommy, but I need -"

"Wait, feelings?" Tommy asked.

"Later," Evan assured him.

#911 abc #911 #911 on abc #the ally and the beast #bucktommy #tommy kinard #evan buckley #eddie diaz #buddietommy #cuck!tommy wip #jules writes #jules answers #mrhappyjavaman

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bladekindeyewear · 3 months ago

Text

HS^2 bloggin’ mainline 2024-10-08

(Previous post - current page 666)

Just caught the tweet announcing an Update as soon it went up! From the look of the log it seems we're moving on, unless there was an addition to p666 which I doubt since they would have warned people to update their cache in the tweet or what have you. So it's time to finally move on from this page, I'm clicking that Next button!

I get the feeling from the log moving onward that this situation isn't going to be resolved in the next page, and we're either going to cut back later... or cut back to Vriska emerging from the Plot Point from John and the others' perspective, because we know she only has one thing left to do. (Other than the question of exactly how she's leaving there, which I assumed would be something special rather than the Plot Point simply "running out of time".)

(==>)

Yep, the resolution with Vriska is coming later.

ROSE: This is an impressive shield. ROSE: I don't think I've ever seen you make one this size before. JADE: ive been practicing! JADE: if i stay focused i should be able to keep it up for quite a while.

Oh heck I didn't notice, that's a cool-ass green Spacey shield with a Space symbol on it! That ought to be a tough nut to crack with any weaponry! (Is she protecting the ship, or the rebel forces maybe? The bubble doesn't seem to be wrapped around the meteor.)

ROSE: Honestly, if it gets to be too much of a hassle, we should be fine as long as the kids stay inside. ROSE: This ship was specifically designed to take a battering. JADE: from artillery maybe JADE: but who knows what kind of other nasty weapons jane has tucked away in her diabolical business pantsuit! JADE: its not like she tells jake everything JADE: or almost anything, really JADE: when it comes to the kids id rather be safe than sorry ROSE: Sure.

Ohh, of course they're shielding the ship, especially the part containing the children. A good chance they won't just stay inside though, especially given this caveat being announced-- though whether they can or can't get through Jade's shield is a different story, unless they break out some new powers or the ship's possible transportalizers.

JADE: by the way JADE: i saw kanaya leave earlier ROSE: She's meeting Karkat on the field. JADE: without you? ROSE: Yes. ROSE: She made it pretty clear that it wouldn't be wise for me to join her. JADE: oh... ROSE: Mhm. ROSE: Some barb about the danger of me "Being Maimed Quite Viciously" on account of all humans looking the same once the bloodshed begins. ROSE: Then she shot me a peace sign and walked away. JADE: ugh, im sorry rose :(

Yeah, Kanaya's off working out some SERIOUS stress most likely. And Rose was very awful pulling that Sapphire future vision excuse to avoid contending with the emotions of the present, to "stop trying" with her. Hopefully someone or something lights some sense under her ass, maybe something to do with the children and them going off to do something dangerous simply because Rose hadn't bothered with the trouble of discussing more of the live situation with them... I dunno. She clearly needs something jarred loose about her attitude, if what Jade said earlier didn't explicitly do it. Maybe Jade can help more right now?

JADE: this should never have happened JADE: between yiffys capture and rescue and finding dave... JADE: like that... JADE: i just feel like my life flashed before my eyes and it made me a little crazy! JADE: after being unconscious for a bit things feel way clearer now ROSE: Nothing beats a rump to the skull for mental clarity.

Oh my god, Tavros actually knocked her out cold when he fell from the ceiling?! (And I'm reminded again that she was carrying the stuffed corpse or arm of someone, presumably Dave but we can't be 100% sure.) I wonder if this is trying to make excuses for some of her Candy-timeline behavior... though out of all of them, she has the least to excuse, really? I feel like both versions of her were remarkably in character and didn't do nearly as much weird potentially-Muse-guided stuff like Roxy and others at that initial funeral for Dirk back in the epilogues.

JADE: the mistakes we made are so obvious to me now JADE: embarrassingly obvious! JADE: we should never have talked to john in front of kanaya, for one thing JADE: they required way different approaches ROSE: Oh, so that was the problem? JADE: one of them at least

Bolding Rose for dryly pointing out that this is VERY MUCH a backslide into the wrong approach to this entire situation that Jade's having, focusing on the actions required to approach or defuse each person as if fulfilling video game objectives, trying to make everyone happy instead of trying to come clean and trusting the others to do as they will. She's trying to control (Witch) the situation too much, which was her issue in the Candy timeline in the first place.

JADE: i definitely wasnt expecting you to say all THAT either JADE: but i know she hit a sore spot so its understandable why you lost your temper JADE: its my fault for panicking ROSE: Interesting. ROSE: I didn't even realize I was mad. JADE: i mean JADE: it brought me back to the last time i mentioned your mom and you flipped that table ROSE: I was eighteen. JADE: you didnt talk to me for a month! ROSE: Eighteen years old. JADE: yeah and i havent tried to talk to you about it since!

Oh damn, those are some gigantic fucking unresolved Mom issues she has in this version of events that it sounds like she should have seen a psychologist or dozen about! D:

JADE: look all im saying is JADE: i understand why things went downhill the way they did and im not going to get caught off guard again JADE: this whole situation is my fault and even though it just keeps getting more frustrating and shitty im going to do right by you JADE: were going to figure this out ROSE: Are you sure it's prudent to keep this amateur marriage counselor performance up? JADE: rose... JADE: youre taking this seriously JADE: right? ROSE: I don't know what you mean by that.

Jade is still thinking she has to be in control and responsible for everything... and Rose is so afraid of tackling everything that she's practically dissociated from her own marriage. Her distorted Seer of Light vision or not, that's not going to help-- again, Steven Universe taught us that with Sapphire in Keystone Motel.

(==>)

COOL-ASS shot of Jade and her adorable pawprint gloves-- goofy shot of Rose with her short hair practically invisible. :D

JADE: i think you do but bleh whatever as long as we don't have a repeat of last time we can still position you as the good guy JADE: or at least less of a bad guy JADE: though playing stupid and cajoling her into slapping me around for catharsis wont work anymore JADE: well have to think of something else... ROSE: Jade, I've been compliant with these clumsy machinations partially because they weren't all that consequential at the time, but you need to cut your losses. ROSE: It's time to start looking beyond the end of your own nose, and accept that these methods aren't going to work. ROSE: This is not a situation you can win. JADE: im not trying to "win" anything!

Yes she is, this is exactly what I was talking about! Jade treating this like a problem to be solved instead of confronted, much like she did with trying to be in a relationship with Dave and Karkat at once in this timeline, instead of allowing others agency to help determine the endpoint of the situation. Because if she's too controlling, those methods themselves are going to dismantle her efforts, which at least Rose recognizes even if SHE'S wrong about other things.

JADE: im trying to be an adult and not run away from this ROSE: Look, I know better than anyone the satisfaction of gaming people's reactions and getting into their heads. JADE: (oh my god are you even listening to me) ROSE: But it's a losing game. ROSE: You're going to push too hard, or misconstrue something critical, or cross another line. ROSE: And you'll regret it. ROSE: That's not conjecture, it's a guarantee.

She IS right. But she's also being defeatist to avoid opening up and admitting fault, and ESPECIALLY to avoid confronting any uncomfortable emotions or problems she's still stopped trying to confront both without and within herself. That Mom stuff especially from the sound of it. Maybe unpacking that at some point soon will help shake Rose loose a bit.

JADE: youre so frustrating to talk to these days! JADE: "ohhhh bluh bluh blah i can see the fruitlessness of all our clumsy insignificant thrashing in fates cosmic current" JADE: dont forget im more than a little versed in future sight myself ok JADE: i dont care how credible it seems, you cant depend on that information!

An allusion to her long, long childhood stint inverted to Seer of Time and guiding everyone with Skaia's clouds before she was knocked violently loose from the habit out onto a true path of active agency!

ROSE: I know it's hard to hear, but you need to take a second to think about what I'm saying. ROSE: Don't you feel the least bit relieved? ROSE: You've spent so many years wrangling this dirty little secret. JADE: that "dirty little secret" is my fucking daughter ROSE: Well, now she's not a secret anymore. ROSE: You don't have to shoulder the burden of keeping her tucked away from everyone in the entire world for fear of the consequences, because the consequences have happened. ROSE: You're free to invest all that energy elsewhere. ROSE: Maybe work on yourself a little bit. ROSE: We could even unpack the hamster guy. JADE: oh we are not talking about the fucking hamster guy JADE: i don't want to talk about any of it really!

It's kind of fascinating how they've constructed a conversation where not only are BOTH parties acting so wrong, they're also completely right in naming each other's faults. Jade, the problem *IS* that you don't want to talk about it.

JADE: ever again! JADE: thinking back to that whole conversation makes my skin crawl!!! JADE: "abloo hoo hoo, my life is a monkey paw, everything i want hurts me in the end" ROSE: It was a little pathetic. JADE: I KNOW!

Jade has been hiding her vulnerability from the ENTIRE WORLD to the point where she essentially wanted to stop existing, except vicariously through her daughter, and she thinks now that it's been uncorked a little she can just go RIGHT BACK to never dealing with her problems ever again. NOPE! Doesn't work that way, Jade!

JADE: it had nothing to do with what we were trying to DO JADE: it just derailed everything... JADE: and worst of all, yiffy heard it! JADE: ugh!!!! ROSE: You can't keep trying to control the narrative forever, Jade.

Hah!!! (Bolded for emphasis.) Controlling the narrative, controlling her friends, controlling reality because reality IS "the narrative" here (and Space is the story's pages).

Geez I've had a lot to say and I'm only partway through the second page of this upd8.

ROSE: If Kanaya wants to hate me, or punish me, she has every right to. ROSE: She asked for the truth. JADE: oh come off it!!! JADE: the truth is whatever people WANT to believe JADE: you can either try forcing them to understand your side JADE: leave it completely in their hands and take no responsibility JADE: or you work with their wants and perspectives JADE: and make some informed compromises ROSE: Over the state of reality? JADE: rose i am begging you can you please cut it out with all the cryptic cosmic crap and come back down to earth???

Rose is absolutely WAY too defeatist here, and Jade is still trying to take too much control. FORCING them to understand your side? It's impossible for people to perfectly understand each other-- and mutual understanding takes time and being open about yourself. Jade had to be forcibly pried open into revealing what vulnerabilities she actually had here and she thinks it's pathetic and regrettable, instead of the biggest step towards salvaging this situation that anyone has taken so far, which it was!!! Taking responsibility means taking responsibility for your own flaws; at least Jade is right here that Rose is basically taking NO RESPONSIBILITY AT ALL for her side of the relationship, consigning it all to fate so she doesn't have to work on herself. Neither of them want to confront what's wrong inside their own hearts and their own insecurities. (When really they should be opening up about themselves and getting closer to my Kanaya/Rose/Jade OT3 ship. /s )

ROSE: Things aren't like they used to be, Jade. ROSE: There are no right or wrong routes, anymore. ROSE: Just a tangle of meandering side-paths. JADE: so what, that gives you a free pass to self-destruct? JADE: the best choice was to "double down and say a bunch of horrible insane shit to your wife" ?

Rose still feels deep down that because this isn't a "relevant" timeline anymore, that nothing here matters, just like Vriska used to. Maybe if they pull off the Plot Point plan and forcibly drag this timeline closer to relevance, something will kick off in Rose's mind that tells her, GUESS WHAT, THE STAGE LIGHTS ARE ON, you can't just say that this entire timeline doesn't matter anymore? Hmm.

ROSE: Jade, over the course of 15 years, when have any of your efforts done a grain of good? ROSE: For yourself or Dave? JADE: woooooooow i know what youre doing ok? JADE: go ahead push every button i have i dont give a fuck JADE: youre the one that has everything to lose here JADE: and no matter what awful things you say it wont change the fact im worried about you ROSE: Don't be. ROSE: I've done fairly well for myself this past decade and a half. ROSE: I've been happy. JADE: thats whats scaring me! JADE: youre not prepared for how bad it can get JADE: you have no idea at all!!!!!!!!!!! ROSE: If you say so.

Having felt like she failed with Dave, and then had him go off and die on her rather than stay with her, Jade is TERRIFIED that Rose is going to ruin the amazing thing she's had with Kanaya out of apathy and fear. Maybe if Kanaya turns out to be in serious danger from something she didn't foresee, and Rose actually has to confront being genuinely scared of losing her for good, it can dislodge Rose from feeling like she'd be happy letting everything keep falling apart around her? That she absolutely HAS TO FIGHT to keep this relationship, that a relationship requires "trying", and that you can't waste time not trying at all thinking you have everything locked down tight and nothing to lose, because as Jade recently learned you can lose EVERYTHING in a moment.

JADE: ... between you and dave and john i dont know whos worse JADE: is it really that hard for any of you to care? JADE: if you dont get your head on straight and begin trying shell leave you JADE: all youve had together and everything you could have had JADE: gone! JADE: and since youre so cool with talking about your mom now JADE: you shouldve learned that lesson from her a long time ago! ROSE: Excuse me-

OUCH. Bringing up all the regrets from the moments after Rose realized she'd lost her mother, lost ANY CHANCE to make amends with her before Jack killed her... the moments which Jade was there for over pesterchum talking to her during, right before she flew into a Grimdark rage.

JADE: look it takes a lot of concentration to hold this perimeter JADE: i think itd be best if you looked after the kids ROSE: ... JADE: inside. ROSE: Fine.

Why is the next command "Rose: Ramble"? Is she going to start talking to herself? Probably, set up by Jade's "(oh my god are you even listening to me)" line. Pulling a Dave Strider and talking to herself since she can't hold a conversation with Jade here.

(Rose: Ramble)

Yeah that's a dark, hopeless, kind of dissociated look on her face.

Oh she's rambling INTERNALLY, there's a lot of black text on this page. XD

You saunter on out of there. You could say so much more, but it’s fine. Jade has no idea what she’s talking about. There’s not a thing to worry about here. You came out the womb playing defense, you’re not about to drop the ball now.

Opening up for self-examination, being vulnerable like they BOTH need to let themselves be to move forward, is the polar opposite of "playing defense". I wonder if she's dunking on herself, here.

If you hadn’t, maybe you’d be more concerned with the torrent of bullshit you’re dealing with. You really are getting it from all ends here, between Jade’s guilt-ridden busybodying and the glint of rage and pain in your wife’s eyes and the sudden, inexplicable tragedy of your brother’s demise.

Ohhh fuck. Dave's death is hitting her too. I'm not sure why I forgot it would. No wonder she's been shutting down instead of confronting anything.

All that on top of the twist of your gut every time you see your mother in Roxy’s face or hear her in Roxy’s voice. Really, you should be losing your shit. Instead, your emotions are in order and your shit is on lockdown exactly where you tucked it away, smooth operator that you are. God, you need a fucking drink.

Gosh, that's sad. And yeah, she totally IS dunking on herself. She knows on some level that something's seriously wrong with her, and she's just avoiding it, conceding defeat even though she knows she's undoubtedly part of the problem. A part of the problem she's partially given up on fixing.

Submission -- to fate, to the oblivion of drink, to everyone else's will -- is Void, simultaneously the essential duality of and a weakpoint of her nature as a Light player.

Instead of folding, you try to curb the craving by focusing on the inside of your hand and slowly moving that energy to your fingertips. Jade is right, of course, but only on a base, intuitive level that is otherwise lacking in specifics and easily misinterpreted and manipulated. For there to be inarguable truth there has to not only be an authority, but one that cares enough to reinforce their intentions absolutely, and you can’t imagine any such authority caring all that much about this laughable mess.

I'm not sure if I completely agree on inarguable truth being contingent on an authority existing (I mean I suppose so in terms of the limits of both-scientific-and-historical observation in our universe, relying on human and imperfect accounts, and also it's DEFINITELY true when talking about A STORY and being able to read the author's interpretation of something or if there was one at all as opposed to the Death Of The Author that Andrew has been foreshadowing since most of the way through Homestuck is what he believes to be a better outcome for the work), but I suppose she doesn't realize that Calliope is the one who authored this timeline-- the living, non-ascended Calliope back in the Meat side. And she absolutely cared-- and we, the readers, do too!

If there’s no truth, then why even bother looking for your best option? Just leave the hierarchy of choices in ashes, the Mayor would be so proud. And then horribly disappointed, realizing this doesn't mean democratic power to the people. It means total fucking black out.

She's really, REALLY hung up on this being a non-canon timeline isn't she? Not only that-- but an AUTHORLESS timeline. She sees this whole timeline as Void (a black out, devoid of meaning and importance) and she can't see how she should actually be caring about it; she's just as doubtful about the validity of non-canon works of Homestuck, that the fanfics that we come up with because we care about these characters could be anywhere as interesting or worth caring about as canon, much in line with Dirk Strider's viewpoint that nothing could possibly matter if it doesn't have a Higher Purpose to the main, author-stamped story. Luckily enough HS^2's entire thematic structure is built to eventually prove her wrong, to teach her and Dirk and all the rest of us that Homestuck and its characters are worthwhile even wrested from the author's grip!

It’s only through quite rigorous contemplation of this metaphysical miasma (to the detriment, some might say, of your attention to the present moment) that you’ve managed to glean much of anything at all, a wonder in and of itself. Trying to decode these countless twisting paths has taken years of practice, but like all your favorite games the tedium enhances the satisfaction of playing. A small pastime, like a crossword, to privately enjoy outside the scope of any intrusive third persons. Currently, for example, you know that Vriska’s up to something important within the meteor. Exceedingly important, actually, far more important than anything here has had any right to be in a long, long time. It’s a point of almost disturbing clarity in the otherwise nebulous and ill-defined milieu of your prognosticative purview. You’re not quite sure what it actually is, though.

Interesting look into her non-ultimate Seer of Light talents, and the current limits they possess based on the combination of her abilities' limits in this Candyverse and her own beliefs and perspective. Why IS what Vriska's doing so important?

It doesn’t really matter, in the long run. Important or not, Vriska’s going to fail. Jane’s going to fail, too; really, just about everyone is going to fail to do something that really matters. In an unsuccessful effort to stave off that failure, and perhaps to atone for it on some level, Calliope will sacrifice herself, fruitlessly. You’re not exempt from the firing squad, either. In the imminent battle, you are going to be shot in the head, the bullet burying deep into your moral grey matter and jamming up the works of your conditional immortality, leaving you confined to a hospital bed. You had to pull all kinds of ridiculous, eyebrow-raising Chaos Theory shit to figure that one out. The rat-tail was worth it, your daughter’s anguish aside.

I'm not sure what she means by "the rat-tail" (does one of the people she knows have that hairdo?? Meenah? what does that have to do with her daughter? if anyone knows what she's alluding to by saying "the rat-tail was worth it" let me know in the replies), but I'm starting to see why she's been acting so hopeless. She doesn't mind Kanaya getting serious distance from her because she thinks she's going to get locked into a coma soon and she doesn't want Kanaya to mourn her as badly. That's pretty fucking depressing. I wonder which parts of this whole prediction are wrong, and why?

Calliope, this Calliope, sacrificing herself I can absolutely see (she's done observing within her fanfic, in a sense, and while not in a serious relationship with anyone she might decide to step out of the way and relinquish her Ring of Life for the sake of saving someone else)-- but fruitlessly how? And if Vriska is going to "fail", then why is what she's doing so damned important, hm? Fail at what, and gain what else in the process, to still invoke such importance? That's not something Rose has addressed or been willing to see. (EDIT: To clarify a bit here, not only is she blind to the purpose Vriska will accomplish-- it's definitely possible that Vriska leaves the plot point WITHOUT resolving her psychological issues, "fail" to, but even then she'll be only one step away from becoming her Ultimate Self at a pivotal moment and she'll already know what that last step IS inside herself, holding on to the Point's importance to finally do the most important step at a later time after getting out. That's just one of many ways to spin things, and she's blind to the true purpose of the Point regardless, or what "failure" truly constitutes in this situation.) Will Rose really enter a coma, and if she does, is her fatalism keeping her from seeing that some unexpected ray of hope is probably going to free her from said coma?

Kanaya may not see it this way at first, but your lobotomy sleepytime will be a well-earned, golden opportunity for her. A chance to experience life unshackled from the ol’ ball and chain. Even if it requires you to foist some compelling motivation for her to embrace it. She can’t waste her independence waiting on you again. You refuse to accept that outcome. What’s the point of a world where anything is possible if the love of your life won’t explore her full potential?

Yeah fuck that!!! I figured this was where Rose was leading, seeing herself as a net negative and refusing to believe that she's WORTH Kanaya, an insecurity she holds so tightly to that she's unwilling to fight for her own happiness. Thinking Kanaya's true potential lays in places that won't circle right back to you eventually. (Rose might be hinting at Kanaya unlocking some of her latent power, quite possibly-- considering the Sylph of Space as a healer, breaking through to that potential might even be enough to save her from the coma she's mentioning.)

It might even be gratifying for her romantically, though you haven’t peered too deeply down those corridors out of respect for her hypothetical privacy (surely not because they’d make you want to rip off your own face to perceive; that’d be hypocritical). Whatever. It’ll be good for her to stretch her legs, and it’s not like you’ll be awake to miss her.

Interesting... now THIS is a huge, huge blindspot for Rose. Since she's refusing to look down the paths of possibility where Kanaya feels for anyone other than her, what if this is one of the biggest reasons she's missing the path of possibility which eventually saves her and reunites them? (No, I'm not just saying that for the sake of Kanaya/Rose/Jade OT3... not entirely, anyway. >_>")

Or everything will collapse and everybody will disappear. It’ll certainly happen eventually. Maybe in an hour, maybe a day, a couple weeks, millenia from now. Who’s to say? Those specifics are beyond you now.

Everyone's seriously underestimating the Candy timeline. Everyone except Roxy and Calliope, the Rogue of Void and the Muse of Space, working together across the canon-to-non-canon barrier... the perfect pair of heroes to set events into motion that will make everything outside of canon real.

It’s this thought that unwinds you, untwisting your knickers. It’s hard to take things too seriously when you know that the details don’t matter and the ending never changes. It’s out of your hands. There’s nothing left to lose.

When Did You Stop Trying

She's practically LETTING herself get shot just so she doesn't have to see the rest of a story she doesn't think matters! Hopefully she'll be rather ridiculously surprised to find her timeline mattering after all-- to everyone both inside and outside their story. Hopefully we don't have to watch her agonize TOO long waiting for her to figure that shit out, even if the possibility of a certain duration of coma ends up making that wait longer than we'd like. At least in that case, we'll get to see the flabbergasted look on her face when she's brought out of her condition and realizes that everything suddenly matters again!

(==>)

A preview of what she sees ahead. Damn.

You’re nobody now. Just a shadow. Dirk was right to leave. He would have hated this existence. Ah, well.

I'd hoped both this Rose and Rosebot wouldn't make the exact same mistake, because hopefully we get to see them both convinced out of it... but possibly it could be circumstantially simultaneous? That'd be pretty appropriate given one of them is Ultimate Rose.

All tension has left your body, at this point. You don’t retreat to the heart of the ship; you have somewhere to be, so you set off, moving not towards a definitive point on the horizon but in cadence with a song that dances on the periphery of your awareness. You heard its first few tentative notes years ago. A subtle ‘ding’ when your ecto-father died. A little ‘dong’ when your wife handed you your daughter. A clear ‘ting’ when an old friend asked you for her first and only favor. Over time, and especially within the past few days, these scattered sounds have woven together into a compelling melody.

This sounds sort of like a mix of what meat!Calliope wrote into the Candy timeline, and intervention of other authors like Dirk excising himself to strengthen his meat!timeline importance? But mostly that Calliope, the story written in part by that distant author who wouldn't leave you to such a fate as you're expecting.

It helps you drown out the noise of war and focus, taking you back to times when there was destiny and indignation and righteous fury. A colorful cat-squid princess, advising a young girl to “play the rain.” She wanted so much, always needing to be seen, desperate to fight for some shred of validation. Only to never appreciate what was already in front of her. Thankfully, you aren’t her anymore. You don’t owe her anything either. You are unbound to that person completely. Defunct. As above, so below.

I wonder if that statement, behaving like this is Hell (to go with Vriska's purgatorial little trip in the Point), is also a reference to her making the same mistakes on both sides of the Candy/Meat divide? And I wonder if Rosebot truly believes, deep down, that she's the unlucky one in Hell too. Probably not yet, or at least not consciously, especially with Dirk artificially suppressing her doubts. (Also, playing the rain brought up again because at least ONE of these Roses is going to have to pull it off before HS^2 ends!!! It's one of the biggest unfulfilled threads that people wanted to see filled in Homestuck before it ended, and its subsequent continuation-- and goes hand in hand with all of Rose's unresolved psychological issues too somehow most likely, unless it's going to be done to show us that it wasn't indeed the biggest point after all?)

Also, just noting on the side the comparison of the woven thread of the narrative and fate to a musical score, one where the different authors, participants, are contributing parts of the music and different instruments, like the Fraymotifs that blended their aspects to write reality like a song.

Also also, it occurs to me that if Rose is going to enter a coma, she's quite possibly already going to have left a VERY INFURIATING farewell note for Kanaya that shows she saw her coma coming all along, and inadvertently clues Kanaya into the stupid game Rose had been playing by distancing herself so cruelly.

(==>)

A troll soldier looks down from something.

(==>)

Oh, they're bumping face first into a (much taller than them? and very pissed) Kanaya aren't they.

(==>)

Ooh, aglow, too. I wonder if this is a younger recruit or if Kanaya is just tall and huge now; she didn't seem like she compared much taller than Rose and Jade, though most people have always seen Kanaya as tall. This seems like the sort of thing I'd like to see artist commentary on when it comes out. (I've been trying to chew on the artist commentary first back-to-front from where HS^2 first became Beyond Canon, but I'm very slow at it due to some energy issues lately, so even Part 1 of that will be some time coming.)

(==>)

Literally haloed in light! If you weren't so preoccupied with your imminent demise, Rose, you could take some time to appreciate how amazing your wife is and believing in how much she loves you instead of thinking yourself less worthy than SHE thinks of you and casting her off.

(Commanders: Congregate.)

Ooh she mad.

Nothing too important in this page's dialogue, other than Kanaya acknowledging that Rose and Jade won't be involved in directly attacking and that she'd rather that be the case regardless, from an emotional standpoint. She definitely still wants Rose out of the line of fire, even if she's mad at her. (And Jade pulling defensive duty around the children might lose you a big offensive card but it isn't TOO bad, hopefully.)

(==>)

KARKAT: FUCK ‘EM.

Hah! Totally moirails. (Also look at that BLOOD imagery behind the grasping of hands, in all colors of the hemospectrum. That's not subtle Aspect imagery at all! I love unsubtle Aspect imagery! :D )

(==>)

MEENAH: shell yes motherblubber MEENAH: wayward wenches betta step the fuck back MEENAH: its a troll thaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaang

you're ruining the mood meenah

(Jane: Push the big red button. Blast it all to high heaven.)

Yeah Jake's gonna have dismantled that moon superweapon WELL before it fires.

You do not push the button because that would be incredibly stupid. The battle hasn't even started yet. Instead you take advantage of the momentary quiet to breathe. To think about life. About situations you could have handled differently. Feelings you could have... considered better. People you could have saved.

Does she? Does she really? Really now? ¬_¬"

(==>)

OH GOD IT'S A GIANT CAKE LASER THAT'S HILARIOUS

Your father never did voice any kind of opinion on your parenting style. In hindsight, he was probably avoiding the subject altogether. Or didn’t think much about it, focusing his pride on your exploits instead. He did raise a businesswoman, after all. At any point you could have asked for his advice. Now you can't. 15 years. Utterly botched.

Yeah, she definitely screwed the heck up on the parenting front, I suppose that *IS* something she's seriously reckoning with now that Jake has pulled back the curtain. It's too late for her to consider backing down, but she's at least going to feel some regrets and let that eat deservedly away at her before her final moments in this timeline.

Oh pfff, I hadn't even looked at the title of the next link (I'm guessing the answer is YES OF COURSE)

(Jane: Consider, is it too late?)

Of course not.

Really?

You remind yourself, you are incredibly young for a god. It’s natural for your growing pains to be this calamitous. All of the struggle and regret will feed into a brighter future. Newfound order will ensure stability, leading to a period of progress this planet has never seen before. There is so much living left. So many opportunities. This will not be your last chance. You’ll do better with the next one.

This is pretty in line with the way megalomaniacal way Jane behaved back when she was controlled by the Condesce, envisioning an empire with Jake at her side bearing her children forever. Candy is essentially an entire timeline where she followed through on her ambitions without constraint.

Speaking of constraint-- (Gee I thought he was totally going to take the Third Option and fly up to destroy the laser, this can't be over this quickly with a gun to the head--)

(Jane: Look behind you.)

Oh dear, so it definitely IS assassination, then. You must really hate how bad she's been for the children, Jake, to really go through with this as personally as BGD suggested. I was thinking about turning points like this for Hope players (in other media actually, a certain Hope player in Murder Drones actually) and moments of Rage being negative or positive turning points in equal measure, points where their belief in the breadth of possibility is pushed into a corner and it's time for them to narrow everything down to ONE CHANCE, to do or die, to a gun to someone's head or a blade to someone's neck and a willingness to cut a possibility off forever when it REALLY COUNTS to come in balance with their role (in ways depicted in Murder Drones with, hint hint, exactly one of their eyes showing a murder-mode X and the other eye open, as if on the tipping point before that Hope is cut off). How for a Hope player to be effective and balanced, they HAVE to know when they can't just sit on their heels and need to take action even if it means cutting off all the other paths they WISHED were true but can't be, acknowledging reality.

But seriously, if he was fast enough he could have just flown to space and blown up the Cake Laser. I guess this is more effective.

JANE: Jake? JAKE: Hi. Sweetheart. JANE: What are you doing here? Is everything ok? JAKE: It's all gravy train, don't worry! I was only thinking to myself and... JAKE: realized how sorry i'd be if i didn't come wish you good luck. JANE: How thoughtful! JAKE: Mm hm! JAKE: Come here.

Is that really going to work? Maybe with Jane deluding herself this much right now. I feel life if Jake actually pulls this off it'll end the battle far too quickly; maybe he'll shoot her and her Maid of Life powers will bring her back to retaliate the moment he turns his back on the body?

(==>)

Oh dear, he's going in EXTREMELY personal for this isn't he. A point blank shot through the heart in honor of Dirk maybe?

JANE: Well! That felt very lucky. JANE: Hoo, hoo! JAKE: I was hoping so ha ha! JANE: Thank you. ;B JANE: Wow you sure are holding me very tight, I assure you we don't have that kind of time sir! JANE: *eyebrow wiggle* JAKE: So right! Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha. JAKE: Oh Jane. JAKE: Before I let go, I wanted to say first. It's been a hard life and all but, JAKE: I'm really happy I got to see you. JANE: Me too J! JAKE: And... I'm going to miss you. JANE: Aw! JANE: Wait, what?

Looks like she didn't see it coming, even if I don't think it's gonna stick. Just exhausting whatever extra life she's built up in reserve, I'd bet.

[click]

(==>)

OW, to the head! No wonder there was a blood/violence warning in the tweet announcing this upd8.

(==>)

Oh god that's horrifying it didn't finish her off

this dialogue is horrifying why do you have to traumatize Jake more like this he's promising it'll stop oh that's awful okay serious fucking trigger warnings ouch

(==>)

OH GOD and she healed herself and knocked his aim off course. This is why you always double tap. D:

She's gonna be PISSED. (I didn't need the vivid mental imagery of bullets stuck in heads a third time counting Rose AND this anyway, brain damage is a bit of a trigger for me.) Hopefully Jake at least gets away, or destroys the launch button, or with his assassination attempt failed NOW goes to fly off and destroy the cake laser directly on the moon.

(==>)

Alright that's pretty cool! Not good obviously, but inevitable.

JAKE: W-w-w-w-w-w-wha? JANE: As I was saying- JANE: Jake.

Counter-attack incoming.

(==>)

JANE: IF YOU HAVE ONE SHOT

(==>)

OH THAT'S SOME HYPER VIOLENT PISTOL WHIPPING OUCH. EVEN IN BEYOND CANON THEY AREN'T HOLDING BACK A BIT ON THE MATURE GODDAMN RATING even when it isn't a psychological deep dive owowow

JANE: YOU BETTER JANE: MAKE IT JANE: *FUCKING* JANE: COOOOOUUUUUUUUNT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I wonder how he's going to get away? He deserves to after this, and also he's possibly the only one who knows about the space laser and isn't coming out of this without at least one big solid heroic accomplishment that sticks under his belt. The space laser seems pretty much designed for him to intervene.

(==>)

You stop your onslaught, knowing the next couple blows will finish the job. A just death. How romantic.

Pfff-- I guess even if she killed him, it wouldn't announce that the death had been Heroic over his head.

Oh wait, I just realized--! Jake has TWO GUNS. Both the prior shots ought only to have been from one, unless he switched to single shot pistols for some arcane reason.

Between the adrenaline and taste of blood in your mouth, the decision is clear to you. You will not fail yourself. You will claim the spoils of this war and oversee a thriving planet. Cultivating an ever bettering stock of humanity. Your future. On and on. Forever. Alone.

Yeah sure you will.

Wait, what does that next link even mean? --Oh, it's Spades Slick and the co-opted Felt gang members she captured isn't it?? :D I've been waiting for her to unleash them!

(Jane: Release the Brig Boys.)

Wait what the fuck

As if!!!!! Maybe some time in the trenches with the Brig Boys will do him some good.

Oh my GOD she's seriously letting him go?! I'm not sure if that's not even more messed up in the head of her than killing him! She's seriously got a screw loose. She's really afraid of being alone and sure he'll come back to her side, isn't she, even if she needs a leash to force him? (And plot-speaking this just gives him a chance to fly up and bust the Moon Laser.)

Why are they Brig Boys, doesn't that mean prisoners? I mean I guess she probably paranoidly imprisoned some of the clone soldiers, but...

(==>)

Oof, Jake splats to the ground.

Death would be a kindness, after all. You gave Jake a shot to stay by your side and make something of himself, but in the end he proved himself just another deserter. You should have seen it coming; you learned 15 years ago that people will slip right through your fingers if you let them.

well what's your plan then

It’s fine. You won’t let go again. Jake is your means to an end. When you scramble his frontal lobe, you’ll make sure it doesn’t heal right. It won’t be much of a change, anyway.

JESUS CHRIST WOMAN

If I didn't know better I'd accuse someone who worked on this slate of updates to have known about my trigger about the idea of brain damage and personally stacked this one up against me! Good thing I worked out a lot of my fears in therapy so much before this, sheesh. Beyond Canon might know when to STOP punching and crack a joke but when they punch they don't pull those punches, ouch.

(Jane: Commence battle.)

Good thing Jake's already sitting up. You'd better not wallow in that discouragement from the failed assassination attempt, GO AFTER THE MOON LASER. (Though, Rose did warn us that from her biased point of view "just about everyone is going to fail to do something that really matters".)

(Jake: Look out into distance.)

JAKE: TAVROS!

Aw damn, is he going to fly in to help and leave the moon laser problem to someone else? At least he's the one parent of Tavros's focused on something he should of the two.

(==>)

That's a letter from Rose and a pack of trail mix. Rose, now that we know you're lining up future events so things turn out a certain neutral-victory sort of way, I can't help but wonder what the fuck you're planning with the kids. (And how they're going to potentially far surpass your limited expectations.)

On the plus side this means that as soon as we've reckoned with that letter WE FINALLY GET BACK TO THESE KIDS AND POTENTIALLY HAVING SOME FUCKING DIALOGUE THAT INCLUDES YIFFY OR IS ABOUT AND AROUND HER AT LEAST, I'VE BEEN WAITING SO EXCITED TO GET BACK TO THEM AFTER THAT JADE HEART-OUTPOUR THAT YIFFY OVERHEARD AND IS LIKELY STILL MIFFED ABOUT! :DDD Gosh I've been waiting for Yiffy and the other kids to interact more.

I'm extra busy with family stuff for a couple weeks so I probably won't post anything extra between now and the next update, but as usual I'll be right there when it arrives. Until next time!

#Homestuck #hs2 #Homestuck Liveblog #Homestuck^2 #upd8 #spoiler #spoilers #Rose Lalonde #Jade Harley #Light and Void #Calliope #Jane Crocker #Jake English #Kanaya #Hope and Rage

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nyehilismwriting · 1 year ago

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happy new year!! sending you all my bestest vibes for 2024. which I simply Refuse to believe is a real year. if you will all permit me, I'd like to be embarrassingly sincere for a moment:)

2023 was.....difficult for me, in many ways; not as materially as 2022, but overall less productive, less extreme, and more exhausting. I didn't get as much writing done as I would've liked; nor did I get many of the things done that I planned.

still, I made progress. I've written a lot, even if it's disjointed: I've written things I'm proud of, and things I've already forgotten about, and I've managed to re-establish a reading habit that's been on the downhill for a long time. I think I've learned a lot, and improved as an author and creator, and I've made progress towards making peace with a few things about myself and my creative process.

wrt hadea: the update is SO close to being done. I've been saying (and telling myself) it'd be done by the end of the year, and now, on the evening of the 31st, I think I'm going to have to admit that that's just not going to happen.

those of you who are on my patreon will know I've suspended payments; I'll be doing so again for January, and posting the update when it comes. Once the update is out, I'll most likely be unlaunching my patreon, but I'll figure out a way to make the bonus content available to everyone who's paid for it, freeing up more time and energy to focus on the game. this update is only going to be half a chapter, with the second half largely written already but in need of some serious work - I want you guys to have content, and hopefully this means the wait between updates won't be so long next time.

I hope you're all enjoying yourselves this new years, and that 2024 is a good one for you all!

#2024 let's get it on cunts.#it's been a protracted mental breakdown of a year I won't lie to you #but this game is super important to me and I am working hard to get her updated !!#and I'm sorry. and I love you and appreciate your patience and your kindness #and I am kissing you on the mouth. with tongue

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wolveswithblackpearls · 20 days ago

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Bring Me To Life

Genre: Angst, Power Era, MAMA Era, Open Ending

Summary: All is well when Chanyeol returns from his patrol. The red force is probably still licking its wounds from their last confrontation, right? ...right?

Word count: 4 k

Warnings: major character death, revival / coming back from the dead, coming back wrong

A/N: Happy Holidays @exo-xexo! I (admin j aka @breeze-of-sunlight) am your secret santa~

I wish for you to be able to end this year peacefully and find some rest in the coming weeks. Hopefully you'll enjoy this little fic - let me know what you thought of it if you want!

For all those unfamiliar, this fic was posted as a part of the @exols-silver-christmas event 2024. Please check out the gifts from this and the past years if you want to see some beautiful creations by all kinds of EXO-Ls. Happy holidays to you too, santa admin. As usual, thank you so much for hosting!

May you find time for yourself in these last days of the year, dear reader.

"Chanyeol, duck!", is the last thing Chanyeol hears before something hits his shoulder and promptly dissolves into goo all over his neck and back.

And it had been such a good day until now.

He can hear Kai and Sehun cackling behind him as he tries to shake off the worst of it and pull the more resistant parts of the novaberry from the hair on his nape. "Real mature guys, incredibly funny! You're off duty for five seconds and immediately behave like little shi-"

"Sorry, I tried to warn you, but I guess my timing was off.", Suho tries to placate as he makes his way to Chanyeol opposite of where the still snickering duo stands.

"Apology accepted, but only if you send these two right back on patrol again."

Suho huffs a laugh at that and brushes off a piece of the berry Chanyeol had missed. However, a frown replaces his easy grin and he turns to address the others. "Could you come over here, please? I need to ask you all something without yelling my lungs out".

"Sure", Kai hollers back and reaches out to grab Sehun's neck. The later only has a short second to let out an undignified squawk before they get teleported across the field and materialize next to Suho.

"Ugh, I hate it when you do that! Could at least warn me beforehand?"

"I could."

"But? You won't?"

"Boys,", interrupts Suho, long suffering of his brother's antics, "could we please focus for one second?"

"One.", echo Kai and Sehun at once but stay silent afterwards. Chanyeol can smell Suho’s hair greying.

"Have any of you noticed anything different or suspicious on you patrols today?", Suho makes a point of staring each man in front of him down until they shake their heads one after the other. "Has anyone heard back from Baekhyun yet?"

Chanyeol feels his face drop. "No, why? Is something wrong? What's going on?"

Sighing heavily, Suho lowers his head and pinches the bridge of his nose. "There might be." When he raises his head back up, he admits " Baekhyun is not yet back from his mission. I talked to the others too, but no one has heard from him since he left this morning. And we can’t reach him via transmitter right now. Quite frankly, I'm worried."

And you're definitely not alone with that. Chanyeol adds mentally. Baekhyun has never been their most serious member. On the contrary, nothing seems to bring him more joy than to aggravate the others. But not coming home from a standard patrol? Not even trying to contact them about any anomalies altering his usual routes? That's simply not a line even he would cross for the sake of a prank. He must just have forgotten.

"Kai,", Suho pulls Chanyeol back from his thoughts, "I want you to teleport to his usual checkpoints. See if you can figure out whether he's been there today."

Kai nods solemnly, the mischief from a few moments ago long forgotten.

"I don't want you to face this alone and walk into a potential trap. Take Kyungsoo with you."

"Wait, hold up!", Chanyeol interrupts, "What do you mean 'Take Kyungsoo with you'? I'm literally right here?"

“Chanyeol, do not take this personally, but Kyungsoo tends to be a lot more levelheaded than you are in these situations”, Suho tries to calm him down. And Chanyeol can see the reasoning in that, but-

"And we literally need you right here, idiot.", Sehun raises his brow at him. "We're already down a guardian who can cast a shield of light over the tree of life. If this happens to be a trap, we don't need our actual firewall gone too."

Feeling his cheeks heat from being scolded by his younger brother, Chanyeol turns away from the group. A petty fine barely had the time to leave his lips when their transmitters light up simultaneously.

"Guys,", Xiumin’s grim voice filters through the devices, "we found him."

--------------------------------------------------------------------------

There have been few days Chen has felt so much negativity in their hallowed halls. Or rather, beneath the tree of life. For good reason. While the tree is not all powerful, it at least grants its guardians one thing: quasi-immortality. In the long time they've been guardians, they have never had one of them dying.

That doesn't change the fact that Baekhyun’s cold body lies before them anyway. Looking all the more fragile between the massive roots.

But it simply must be him, from his long fingers to the small freckle over his lip, Chen is certain about it. This is Baekhyun. Xiumin could have dumped an entire frozen ocean's worth of ice over Chen's head and he still couldn't have been more frozen in pace.

Chanyeol, as expected, is not quite as silent about the matter.

"Lay, I know your power is health stuff and all, but how in the world is this supposed to work? He's not missing a finger; he's missing a heartbeat."

"'Health stuff and all'? Watch your tongue, Chanyeol. I know this isn't easy for you, but damn, neither is it for us!", Xiumin hisses back, feline eyes narrowed in agitation.

Lay, with his usual calm collectiveness when faced with a patient to attend, pulls Baekhyun's head into his lap and settles a hand over his brow. "Could you all please stop snapping at each other? This is going to be dancing on the edge of the possible already. If you keep distracting me, it's certainly going to go south."

"Besides,", he raises his head to stare into Chanyeol's eyes calmly, "it's not like we have any different options, do we?"

Chanyeol tsks in lieu of an answer but otherwise drops his arguments and resumes pacing. Chen tries to reach out to offer him tactile comfort but his hand gets pushed away. No one but Baekhyun himself could calm him down, it seems. Chen refocuses on the situation at hand instead.

With bated breath the guardians watch as Lay closes his eyes and tries what they've thought was impossible up until now. While Chanyeol is right and their powers have their limits, performing this act of revival right below the tree of life is the best chance they're going to get. If Lay manages to tab into the trees power source, then surely, surely...

Lay shifts his hands, running the tips of his fingers down Baekhyun's head from scalp to chin and then settling next to his temples. The rest of them watches, watches and stares as Lay's hands start glowing. And they glow. They glow and glow and glow and begin shaking slightly after minutes (or hours? Who can say.) pass by. Baekhyun's chest still isn't moving.

Inhaling deeply, Lay tilts his head back in a way easily recognizable to the rest of them. He's trying to tap into the tree's power. Usually, the tree would start winding roots or branches around whoever asked for aid - the energy is easier to transfer that way. Right now, though? The tree does nothing of the like. The branches stop swaying in the gentle breeze, the leaves becoming completely silent. Adding to the eerie atmosphere that has befallen them.

The tension under the tree could be cut with a knife, even Chanyeol has stopped pacing and worriedly glances back and forth between Baekhyun and the tree. Until Lay finally drops his hands, covered in sweat from head to toe, and breathes heavily as though he held his breath the entire time. While he leans down, he whispers something against Baekhyun's face - too quiet for Chen's ears to catch. Lay presses their foreheads together and then slowly wiggles himself out from beneath the body.

Before Chen can react, he hears a gasp next to him and Chanyeol shoots off to kneel down in front of Baekhyun. "No, no way! Baekhyun, can you hear me?"

In full disbelief Chen also storms forward to sink down next to Baekhyun. He faintly notices how Suho grabs Lay by the shoulders to support their healer after was undoubtedly the most complicated use of his powers to this day.

Baekhyun in the meanwhile has not only opened his eyes but is also currently wiping the tears from Chanyeol's face. "What's going on? Why are you crying Yeollie?"

Which of course only results in Chanyeol sobbing harder.

Chen catches one of Baekyhun's hands between his own. "Baekhyun,", Chen begins when he caught the other's attention, "you've been dead for at least the last hour."

Baekhyun's face falls slowly, as if he had to remember how to do it first.

"What?"

"Don't you... don't you remember anything at all? Xiumin said he found you on his patrol, but-", Chen stammers, squeezing the hand harder as Baekhyun beings staring off into the distance.

"But you had no pulse", Xiumin finishes for him, leaning over his younger brothers’ backs. "Baekhyun, are you sure you can't remember anything else?"

"How about you let him come back to himself first?", Chanyeol's head snaps around and he glares alternatingly at his two members. At least until Baekhyun tries to sit up and lets out a long gasp of agony.

"Where... are we exactly?"

Chen makes a bewildered eye contact with Chanyeol as they try to stabilize Baekhyun between them, "Baek, we're under the tree of life. You're home".

"Huh", Baekhyun breathes and cranes his neck around slowly. His eyes dance up the bark of the tree up into its crown. Even slower, Baekhyun tries to lift one arm and reach out to one of the branches dangling above him.

The branch, however, flees his grasp as if repulsed by him. Chanyeol catches it with a still furrowed brow and brings it close to Baekhyun, who in turn promptly touches it. As if burned the branch jerks back and turns black where Baekhyun has laid his hand. The discoloration spreads along the branch, twitching as though it's in pain. The leaves start rustling in convulsion. Chen has never seen the tree act like that, much less after touching one of them.

Xiumin, quick as always, reacts first and summons a blade of ice to cut off the branch above the growing discoloration. The still twitching appendage falls with a heavy thud. In a radius around it the roots begin twitching and rearranging themselves, not wanting to come in contact at all.

With an open mouth Chen tears his gaze away and studies Baekhyun instead. It's as though the man's face has turned to stone, nothing but apathy to be read there. "Interesting."

And suddenly, as if the past hours hadn't happened, Baekhyun smoothly rolls to his feet and dusts off his pants with an air of disinterest.

"Woah there, take it slow Baek! You really shouldn't strain yourself", Chanyeol rises next to him, although with far less grace and holds out his hands as though scared the other will collapse at any second.

"Oh, don't worry,", Baekhyun's gaze fixes on Chanyeol, "Lay did a pretty sound job there."

Something is off about his smile, but Chen can't pin it down. Has this quiet intensity behind his eyes been there a minute ago? Why does he look at them like a predator stalks his prey?

A soft wheeze pulls Chen's attention to Lay instead. The healer has braced himself on hands and knees, one hand lifting to cover his heart. Although he had managed to slow down his breathing before, it now seems to get worse again. Suho has started quietly murmuring to him again, gently stroking his back to calm him down. Kyungsoo lets himself down next to him, naturally gifted at grounding people and offers him a shoulder to lean on.

Baekhyun, apparently, has also noticed their struggling healer and coos mockingly. "Aw, poor one. Did you overexert yourself trying to save your friend, huh? You tree huggers are even more pitiful than initially estimated."

And this? This is the straw that breaks the camel's back. Despite all his teasing and shenanigans, Baekhyun would never let one of them suffer without offering help - let alone make fun of anyone in need. So. What if Lay hadn't brought back their Baekhyun at all? What if he summoned something entirely else into their friend's body.

"You're not really Baekhyun, are you?", Chen asks in a low voice. He subtly shifts into a more battle-ready pose and summons a small string of lightning to dance around his fingers. The quiet flickering of the electricity suddenly grows a lot louder as Chen feels a wave of power and relief wash through him. It's the most encouraging signal the tree has sent him all day.

"Who are you?"

Baekhyun's eyes are widening in pure joy at the open challenge, his smile turning even more manic. "Wouldn't you like to know, weather boy?"

Before any of them can react, Baekhyun performs a spinning move and summons an orb of unforgivingly blinding light. Chen flinches and covers his eyes, afraid of being blinded even though he was only exposed for a split second. From Chanyeol's pained scream he concludes the others aren't faring any better.

He wills his lightning back down again, knowing far too well how foolish it is to shoot at a target he can't sense in any way.

Kyungsoo, however, does not seem to have such reservations. A rumble goes through the ground as he summons an earthquake. Additional to not being able to see, now Chen can't hold his balance either. While sinking to the ground as carefully as he can manage, he at least hopes Kyungsoo manages to shake Baekhyun off his feet as well.

Instead, he feels the telltale rustle in the air that comes with Kai's teleporting and the light vanishes. Soon after, the world stops shaking and Chen warily blinks open his eyes. But Baekhyun is nowhere in sight. And although Kai is still here, his limbs are entangled with Sehun, the two of them must have fallen into one another when the earthquake caught them all by surprise.

"What? Where is he?", Chanyeol asks while heaving himself off the ground, turning in one direction after the other. Chen would comment on him looking like a helicopter during takeoff if the situation wasn't so dire. “He can't have gotten far in so little time!”

"Guys.", Suho gasps an interjection, "Our tree!"

And sure enough, there is a dark, rotting hole in the tree’s bark. Oozing a dark liquid as if it's bleeding, spreading from where Baekhyun must have made contact. The tree’s branches have drooped as though all life was sucked from them; its roots aren't so much as twitching although some of them are currently squished between two slates of earth in a way that must hurt.

A forlorn no is hushed from Lay's lips. He struggles to push himself upright, but instead just falls back against Kyungsoo's chest. "What have we done?"

"He's gone", Xiumin states grimly. Gaze sweeping over the meadow and through the forest surrounding them. Nothing seems out of the ordinary. If it wasn't for the last hour, one might even say it was peaceful.

Chen picks the pebbles that bore into his skin during the earthquake out of the palms of his hand. "We have to find him immediately. Maybe if we can get that possession or whatever that was out of him, it'll teach us how to reverse the damage."

Kai, who has by now managed to detangle himself from Sehun and pulled the latter to his feet, fetches a holomap from one of his endless pockets and boots it up. With the three-dimensional star map projected in front of him, he walks up to Xiumin. "Show me where you first saw him. Maybe I'll be able to track from where he came - and see if he passes by there again."

Xiumin begins gesturing around the map, trying to point out certain coordinates as precisely and quickly as he can manage. Meanwhile, Chen sees how Sehun rids himself of most things in his pockets and even begins taking off his shoes. Clearly preparing to take flight through the woods for long hours. Searching where the rest of them can't follow him with their larger space shuttles. At least not efficiently.

Chen feels the telltale rustle of teleportation behind his back. The sensation makes him pause for a second. Kai couldn't have teleported earlier, except if he teleported himself into Sehun. Which seems unlikely at best. Yet, Chen is sure he felt the same sensation right now as he did before Baekhyun disappeared. You get familiar with the supernatural surrounding you when you live together, after all.

"Now that we're talking about it, how did Xiumin manage to find Baekhyun? Their routes are nowhere near each other."

Xiumin swivels around: "Are you trying to say this is my fault? That I'm a traitor - or possessed by that whatever-it-is as well?".

"Calm down, Minnie, no one here believes you're an imposter", Suho placates, trying to keep them united even when his own nerves must be lying raw. "What's your point, Dae?"

"I'm just saying, what did Baekhyun even do out there? If he went that far off his actual checkpoints, he must've sought out Xiumin specifically. Do you maybe think that he saw the thing coming and tried to warn you?"

"And when he realized he couldn't he sacrificed himself instead", Suho furrows his brow.

"Just a thought."

"Or,", Sehun pipes up, "did any of you stop and think about whether or not we have the real Baekhyun in general?"

Chen is certain he can hear the grass grow over the silence that descends above them.

"Sehun, what the-?"

"No, hear me out.", Sehun intercepts, "We found a body, that miraculously looked like Baekhyun somewhere he shouldn't have been in the first place. When Lay breathed life back into him, the tree of life did not help at all. Don't you think it would be a little keener to help one of its protectors get back on his feet? The twig that thing touched literally wilted at first touch, there's an enormous hole in the tree - that keeps on growing, by the way."

"And we have no actual means to find out how Baekhyun got where he ended up being", Suho adds on. "Fuck, Sehun, you might be right. This basically reeks of red force, doesn’t it?"

"Did we just bring a red force clone of one of us to life?", Chen asks breathlessly.

"Did said clone manage to escape so that he can now spread the knowledge he gained to his master?", Xiumin comments wryly, his lips pressed together in a thin line.

"We're screwed", Chanyeol exhales as he drags his hands down his face slowly. "If the red force knows where the tree of life stands, how long do we have until it starts attacking?"

"And how long", Lay pipes up from where he lays in Kyungsoo's arms, "until we can't trust each other anymore because we can't tell us apart from any clones."

And truth be told, Chen hadn't even considered that. "You think there are more of them? But how? There is no other Lay, no- no, X-Lay, right? How is that X-Baekhyun supposed to bring them to life?"

"No, I don't think X-Baekhyun can do that. But think of it, if the tree can create guardians, it's not too far off to assume the red force can too. And if it's goal with X-Baekhyun was to simply scout the area and find the tree, there's no reason to send all of its subjects and risk potential fallouts."

"And it comes with the added benefit of taking out some of us as well," Kyungsoo murmurs, stroking a comforting hand up and down Lay’s arm.

"I'm not down, I'll be fine in a few minutes."

"Just don't strain yourself. We still need you."

Suho starts massaging his temples. "That would also explain his quick getaway. If there already is a Kai clone, we can stop wondering how he pulled that off."

"So, what now?", Xiumin stares down the hole in the tree darkly. "The force weakened the tree so now it can come back with the big guns and completely claim it? And all we can do is set up wards and hope for the best?"

Chen doesn’t have it in him to respond in any way. He hasn’t felt this foolish and helpless in forever.

"We might not be completely defenseless", Kyungsoo answers quietly instead. "There's something I've read a… while ago. But it's experimental and I might not remember all the details."

Suho sighs heavily. "I can't say I'm thrilled at the thought of more experiments today."

"It's not like we have a lot of other options, though", Kyungsoo counters. Suho nods in agreement and waves his hand to encourage Kyungsoo to keep talking.

"Simply put, we would essentially split the tree in two. Hide each half in a pocket dimension. Each a mirror world of the other. The same skies over different grounds. The same grounds under different skies. That way the red force can't find it based on where it is now. Over time the tree could grow and heal itself. When it's strong enough, we'll reunite it again. Until then we have to find Baekhyun, the real Baekhyun. And we best get rid of any clones or other units of the red force as quickly as we can. I'd rather not take any chances here."

Sehun raises a brow in disbelief: "Won't we just make ourselves vulnerable if we split up? What if they find one half of the tree, charge in there with full force and completely destroy that half of the tree? This just sounds like we're presenting the tree on a silver platter."

Kyungsoo heaves a heavy sigh, as if the worst still lies ahead of him. "There's another thing. Due to the split of our current dimension, we will create some problems with space-time. Which means we're most likely not going to be able to get in touch the conventional way. I'm not sure if we'll even be able to contact each other at all. But that also means the force will get separated. It won't be able to reconnect to its other units and neither can it switch dimensions at will. Not unless we can too. The only other way for it to do that is to wait out until the two dimensions have aligned and we merge the tree once again."

Chen isn't sure how many more hits he'll be able to take today. He locks eyes with Chanyeol, who looks back at him with similarly forlorn expression. When he lets his gaze drag over the different faces of his friends, his family, he sees the same silent emotions. In the way Sehun picks anxiously at his fingernails, in the way Suho is again pinching the bridge of his nose, in the way Lay stares up at the trees crown with glassy eyes. In the tear he can feel rolling down his own cheek.

"This is goodbye then?"

"Yes", answers Kyungsoo, voice barely above a whisper. "But only for a while."

Suho turns away from the group, hands already on his transmitter. "I'll page Kai. We should meet at the ritual grounds. You guys should get a headstart, we won't be far behind."

Chanyeol and Sehun relieve Kyungsoo of his Lay-safekeeping-duties, their taller frames better equipped for carrying around a person. Lay keeps on protesting vehemently that he can walk on his own, but his complaints fall on deaf ears. Neither of them is willing to let go of their friend in what could be the last time for millennia.

Suddenly Chen's field of vision is obscured by a face. Xiumin's worried face. "It will be okay", he promises quietly. "We'll be back together in no time, you'll see. And the tree will have blossomed brighter than ever! Won't that be nice?"

"Yeah, sure it will", Chen snivels softly and tries to muster up a smile for Xiumin's sake. He clearly isn't very successful judging how the grief grows stronger on Xiumin's face as well.

"Just never lose yourself, okay?", Xiumin's finger rise to gently swipe away the tears Chen hadn't noticed rolling down his face in streams now.

"Just be brave. A new world shall open up."

A/N: And that's a wrap! I took some liberties with the whole MAMA intro, but I hope you guys like it anyway :] Please consider leaving me a comment or a reblog, that would make my day! And if anyone's in the mood for it, here's the link to the EXO-K MAMA mv. Take care, everyone!

-admin j

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