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miniimapp · 2 years ago

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Every Hero Needs a Sidekick - Robaire

Gen ;; Action + Romance (Enemies to Lovers??) - Story

Warnings ;; Violence + Mention of Weapons (Guns)

Proofread + Edited ;; Absolutely not mate, have you seen any of my writing before ??

Word Count ;; Guess bitch lmao

Auth. Note ;; WELCOME TO DAY 13 OF THE 4*TOWN CHRISTMAS COUNTDOWN !! Post 2 of the day lmao

I'm thinking this might be a new hero based au :DD

Enjoy !! <3

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You've learned two very important things since your being hired by the hero corporation: patience is a virtue and being a sidekick fucking sucks. Here, crouched behind a bunch of crates crowded near the entrance of the warehouse you could potentially die in tonight, is where you decided to analyse the choices that lead you to this moment.

As one of the corporation sidekicks you don't really have a set hero that you work with, you've worked with many though you do have the ones that crop up more often than most. One being the leader of world-famous hero group 4*TOWN.. Ro.

Look, you're not saying you deserve world fame, or even want it, but it's funny that you're the one running around, kicking ass while he barks commands at you and does next to nothing. Okay, well, he does actually do a fair bit, but still! At the very least you're doing the same amount of work and yet he gets fame and admirers and a shit ton of money and you get nothing? Not even a thank you half of the time? No one even remembers your name yet they can remember these guys entire autobiography because?

All you're saying is if the corporation has enough money to give 4*TOWN their own penthouse office then they have enough to give you a liveable wage.

Speaking of money, you hope they have a slightly heftier paycheck waiting for you when you get back after this mission. It's probably the most dangerous one you've been on yet and you've been lobbed in with Ro so the least they can do is pay you properly for your time.

It's a pipe dream, of course, but it keeps you going.

"Focus, mon amour. If we fail this mission you know what will happen.."

A scowl forces its way onto your face before you're even able to register it and you begin to grumble under your breath, "Yeah, I'll get all the blame and you'll still get praised no matter what.."

You sigh and force yourself to concentrate on the mission, saving your frustration for later.

Suddenly, words start flowing out of your ear-piece and into your ear giving you both a multitude of instructions, "Make sure keep out of sight you two, this is a stealth mission above all else. If you're seen you'll have to take down everyone in there and that's a death certificate waiting to happen. Be careful and we'll see you back at headquarters soon." You hear a click in your ear signalling that the line has closed.. so much for a fucking guide..

"Hear that, be extra careful because this is a stealth mission. Wouldn't want you messing things up after all."

In an attempt to centre yourself once again, you pinch the bridge of your nose and take a couple of deep breaths. God, why were you paired with this motherfucker..

"Being a sidekick has never been more annoying than right now.."

Ro hummed, "What was that?"

You quickly shook your head, "Nothing. Let's go, shall we?"

Ro smirks at you, "I thought you'd never ask."

Huffing out a sigh, you stand up from your crouched position and make your way towards the warehouse. With a short hum you reach for your utility belt, patting around for your grappling hook. See, while you had teleportation as you gift you weren't fond of using unless necessary, too much jumping caused nosebleeds and 12 hours naps. Not ideal.

Annoyingly enough, Ro doesn't seem to share your less than ideal side effects, being able to change his voice to mimic anyone or anything without so much as a sore throat afterward. If you were being honest, you have to admit that his perfect, amazingly strong powers do indeed piss you off, but you're not honest, not about this. Insecurities are dangerous on the field, an unreliable variable that can easily be turned against you just as much as it can encourage you.

You aim and shoot your grappling hook with practiced ease, soon feeling the sudden weightlessness of being pulled into the air. You note Ro following suit, just a second behind you, and continue forward, pulling yourself up onto the warehouse roof and looking around for an opening.

You practically tiptoe over to the warehouse's skylights, contemplating how much force you'd have to put into prying it open. Not much apparently, seeing as Ro brushes past you and slams as much force as he could into the skylight frame with a hammer he got from god knows where with all the stealth of a bull in a china shop.

Let it be known that you'd asked to take this as a solo mission before anyone gets too caught up in blaming you.. god, pay is going to be grim this week..

Obviously the people milling about inside the warehouse notice your.. entrance and, evidently, they're not happy about. At least, this is what you gather after being pushed through the hole Ro created in the ceiling and then immediately cowering away from the shit show that starts up.

Apparently, no one thought to warn that going out on a mission with Ro would leave you in the middle of open fire. Seriously, did no one think about this beforehand? Because a warning would've been nice, just saying..

No time to lament over the thoughts of your agency, unless you want them to be your last it seems. After a bullet skims the side of your face you throw yourself behind a unit packed with boxes upon boxes of what looks to be a gold dust of sorts. Not your problem either way, all you need to do is detain any villains, report to your bosses and then watch a "real hero" get all the praise. No, you're not bitter, shut up, you're just a little tired of being cast aside is all.

You press on your ear com and word vomit to whoever on the other end of the line, "Listen, I think we need emergency backup because we've got all hell breaking loose over here."

"Afraid we can't assist you at the moment, our hands are full until further notice. Keep us updated and stay safe." The line clicks closed once again and you're left reeling.

What in the ever-loving fuck could they possibly be doing that they can't spare one person?

"Mon amour, I need some help over here. I'm surrounded."

You let out a silent groan and teleport yourself back up to the hole in the roof so you can look over the whole warehouse. Clutching at your chest in in attempt attempt steady yourself, your eyes dart around, searching for some sign of Ro before finally locking on to his location. He wasn't wrong, he's completely surrounded and looking worse for wear. Better get stuck in before things somehow go even worse for the two of you.

You will yourself behind a guy to Ro's right, foot flying into the back of his knee as you tackle him to the ground. You quickly knock him out before dodging out of the way of an attack.. this is why you hate doing stealth missions with other people, they always seem to end up in a brawl.

Throwing yourself from person to person, from fight to fight, you lose track of Ro and, despite your complaints, you find yourself hoping he's okay.

As the number of lining up to fight you begins to thin you start look around for him, eventually spotting him behind you to your left. He catches you eye and winks at you as he punches the final minion attempting to get a hit. You scoff and roll your eyes as you duck under a shoddy swing from your current opponent and sweep their feet from under them.

"All done?"

You turn to the source of the voice: Ro. Hes smirking a little but its clear he's exhausted and in a fair bit of pain if the clear favouring of leaning on his right side compared to his left is anything to go by.

"Sure am, you?"

"As you can see, I have risen above all the things sent to try me."

You stare at him blankly before sharply turning and brushing last him and the many unconscious bodies that lay around your feet.

"What did we need to grab again."

You turn and glower at him as he takes an obnoxiously long time pondering before shrugging, "I think they just wanted a report on the situation."

Your eyes widen before narrowing at him, " You mean to tell me that this whole things was practically for nothing?"

Ro at least seems to have the decency to wince, "Not completely, I sure had a good time sharing this bonding experience with you."

You laugh humourlessly at his words, "I can't believe I was worried about you. I somehow forgot how much I despise you.”

You notice Ro's fave brighten just a little before he smirks at you, "I don't think you ever truly despised me, did you? Think wisely before answering, mon chéri, you don't want to go breaking my heart now, do you?"

"Don't push it, Ro."

"At least admit that you like me now, mon amour!"

"..I tolerate you."

"I'll take it!"

You huff and shake your head, using the movement to hide the smile sneaking its way across your face.

"Let's just go back to headquarters."

Ro smiles and dramatically waves a hand gesturing in the direction of what you both assume to be the exit, "But of course, mon chèri. After you."

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Praying that this isn't too shit,, not really used to writing like this,, kinda miss my headcanons but oh well lmao Hope you enjoyed !! <3

#4town christmas countdown #4town #4*town #4town robaire #4town robaire x reader #enemies to lovers #hero au

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herna-chan · 2 years ago

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Fukurodani but make them

✨Hate each other✨

Akaashi Keiji aka physically okay/mentally fucked

You would think this man is okay. We all know that shit’s a lie.

Specifically exists just to be a brat

Being a mom really changed him

Onaga Wataru aka the “nice one”

Says he’s fine but be lying

He tries to be nice to them all but they tell him to shut up (he cries)

One day he gonna snap oh shit-

Washio Tatsuki aka why and how am I still here

He personally asks himself why he stays with them

They’re menaces to society he tells you

Screamed inside the storage room at least once

Komi Haruki aka should I care?

Bullshit be happening but he pretends not to see

You get called in by the cops, he would not send you bailout

would sell you out though

Yukie Shirofuku aka raging feminist

She probably has a Twitter no cap

You a man and you fuck up? “You’re just like your father”

Women ✨💕😩

Kaori Suzumeda aka “sounds like a you problem, luv”

You got a problem, do not ask this girl

Would not know what the fuck is going on half of the time

Also Women✨💕😩

Konoha Akinori aka 4K catcher™️

The man has seen enough shit in his life to write an autobiography about it

He says he’s better than Akaashi (he’s not, he’s worse)

Every since that faithful day, he would cry when walking into the showers.

Sarukui Yamato aka .w.

Would laugh at your anguish

He probably owns a dollar store camera just to catch some bullshit

Wears heels because “bopping people’s feet is fun :)”

And the captain that carries this wonderful team…

Bokuto Koutarou aka Dababy

Not like dababy but like he’s a little bitch 80% of the time

Probably cries himself to sleep

There’s always that one week during a month where he stops taking everyone’s shit and just goes off people (akaashistopfuckingdrooling-)

Oh yeah there’s Anahori Shuichi too

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mibeau · 1 year ago

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[Book Review] YOU’RE THAT BITCH: & OTHER CUTE LESSONS ABOUT BEING UNAPOLOGETICALLY YOURSELF (AUDIOBOOK) - Bretman Rock

SCORE: 4.0/5.0 . . My perspective may not be aligned with many parts of his lifestyle. But we have to admit that this multi-talented Bretman Rock is amazingly inspiring. Bak kata pepatah melayu, “Buang yang keruh, ambil yang jernih.” . So many truths he said can be offensive. But, him, being funny, cute, sassy, yet a kind of gentleman, is acceptable? Fair warning tho, be prepared with his language. Definitely, no kids are allowed! . I enjoyed the way he describe places and foods. This book is a well-delivered travelogue too. Haha. . We all live our own stories, yet we often do not know what to tell others. He is a natural storyteller. It is awesome how he structured his autobiography. It started with the highlights of his life to date. Followed by "extensive" discussions of the life events, by themes. All the struggles, how he deal with them and what can be done better. Due to this, there may be redundant phrases as we read on.

Family abuse is not okay. Hold yourself back from self-sabotaging. Be confident in your own skin. . He shared many tips and life hacks. One of my favourite discussions is on “How to stand up to your bullies” -- by being diplomatic, and compassionate. A great psychology trick. MashaAllah, great pep talk. . Being an iconic celebrity. How did post-famous affect him and transformed him better? The hardest part is to stay relevant and creative without losing our soul and mind. To handle fame, we must know our rights and adhere to our core principles. He also taught us what to consider in creating content and how to deal with criticism. . Learn to forgive yourself. Be a bad bitch but be kind. Yes, we need to adjust the pep talks values to our Islamic values. Overall, his advice covered everything, no matter where you at now in your life, inshaAllah.

One thing he shared that I love 3000: Whenever we feel lost in life, revisit our younger selves. We always plant seeds when we were young, reflect on those feelings, and don’t take things ever seriously. As we said in Islam - Tawakkal & Redha.

#self help books #autobiography #bretman rock #audiobook #book review #YOU’RE THAT BITCH: & OTHER CUTE LESSONS ABOUT BEING UNAPOLOGETICALLY YOURSELF #tawakkal #Redha #Usaha #Jangan Putus Asa #Life goes on #life goes on

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elprupneerg · 10 months ago

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(vague posting about a youtube video i just saw earlier but i don't wanna get into it with the creator or their other fans cuz i genuinely admire them and don't wanna be seen as a hater and also i'm sure the creator didn't mean anything bad by the video but i'm still pissed off and need to get this out somehow so here we are)

first: if you're gonna talk about a historical figure who spent their entire life crossdressing and wrote their own autobiography then maybe you should double check how that person referred to themself in the original language rather than just relying on what the translators decided to use. because translators (especially before trans people were more well known/respected by academia) may have gotten it wrong or mis-translated things, and also since english doesn't have every aspect of our grammar gendered the same way many other languages do we may not be able to read the person's self-professed gender as easily as someone reading the original words might.

second: queer people are not all angels. we can be petty ass bitches (what i'm doing right now), we can contribute to horrible things in this world (environmental issues and genocides and every form of bigotry under the sun), we can be mean and cruel to people around us (see every bit of intra-community fighting we've had since we started forming communities for ourselves).

that pettiness and cruelty and contribution to horrible things does not erase our right to be called the correct names, the correct pronouns, and the correct terms. i might not care for a certain olympic athlete's conservative politics, or a certain drag artist's ties with the fracking industry, or for the internalized bigotry a lot of people around me express cuz we're not perfect and still learning. but that doesn't make it ok to suddenly deny anyone the right to their name and expression

third: figuring out how to refer to historical people who express attitudes/behaviors that would today be seen as queer can be really tricky! i am not denying this! and trying to shove our words onto someone who isn't even alive to hear those words is uhhhhh Not Great. however, it is important to look at the words and attitudes someone has expressed and respect those. for example, if a person has spent a significant part of their life dressing as a man and living as a man and in the original text of their autobiography they use masculine grammar for themself and they only tell someone they're a "woman" because they were about to get executed and were hoping to avoid that and the last scene of their autobiography involves them threatening to beat up some people calling them a woman. Then Perhaps That Person Is Not A Woman And Using She/her Pronouns And His Birth Name Is A Little Bit Transphobic.

yes even if he was a conquistador jackass who traveled around getting into fights and contributing to the genocide of the americas. i do not support antonio de erauso's actions cuz he was a conman and an asshole and literally got a pension from the spanish government for his participation in a fucking genocide. but goddammit he was still most likely a dude and calling him by his birth name is gonna make me give you the stink eye.

#putting this on the 'piss on the poor' website is Probably a bad idea #stg if any of you are saying that i'm supporting a genocidal dick then uhhhhhhh fuck off #antonio is not a role model #but also if we cannot respect the names of the asshole trans people then what is stopping us from deadnaming the 'nice' ones #if you insist on calling him his birth name then i'm gonna be nervous that you'll wanna use mine!#because i'm not fucking perfect then you might deem me 'not trans enough' to have my fucking Name respected #and uhhhhhhh fuck that shit!

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callmearcturus · 1 year ago

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I'm bored and I'm obsessed with Process, so I'll elaborate.

Jim Butcher (author of the Dresden Files) The biggest negative example I know, TDF had this recurring issue where the author didn't seem Aware of what the implications of his own writing was and seemed baffled and even upset when people pointed them out. I learned about close third-person perspective from TDF and I learned the power of an Unreliable Narrator and the limitations of a narrator's knowledge. I learned how to leverage what the Audience knows vs what the Character knows. I learned a lot! Thanks Jim! Sorry your books suck!

Mark Z Danielewski (House of Leaves) I read House of Leaves in parts during the summer when my mother worked at Hastings Entertainment, this huge combination book-game-music-DVD store that didn't survive the shift to digital. HoL was the first thing I read that demanded so much of the reader and couldn't be read casually. I think I learned to trust myself to handle Weird Shit and also that there was an audience for Weird Shit.

Steven Moffat (Doctor Who, Sherlock) Negative example, but I learned that audiences can't just constantly be told something is cool over and over and over. Moffat's greatest failing is that he only cares about the myth arc. If you hand him a character without a legacy, I don't know what the fuck he'd even do. He has no patience for building a character up slowly to show that they are dangerous and powerful. He just says it and is like "trust me." You gotta show your fucking work.

Hideo Kojima (Metal Gear) /face in hands Metal Gear made me queer and pretentious. No, I... owe Kojima so fucking much, but I think the most I owe him is the idea that it's worth being overambitious and failing. Outside MGS2 and MGS3 and maybe DS, I don't know if any of his works truly succeed at the lofty goals he has for them. But it is worthwhile to try and fail and make a compromised artistic statement than to be a boring bitch. Be more queer and pretentious. Make pop culture that means something. And more than anything, Kojima taught me to make people uncomfortable. That is where growth happens. Thanks, Hideo.

Italo Calvino (Invisible Cities and If on a winter's night a traveler) My copy of Invisible Cities is covered in sticky notes for fast reference. I think Calvino taught me that you don't have to explain shit. There are emotional truths that become physical through the conviction of belief. I owe all of the Tradespeople concept to him.

Rachel Pollack (Seventy-Eight Degrees of Wisdom) Archetypes. Symbology. A toolbox. Recurring images and their power. I have a Type and my Type is the Hanged Man. Also no matter how much there is an intended 'right' answer or interpretation, what is truly important is what you see instead. It'll always be more true.

Anne Carson (Autobiography of Red, the Sappho Translations, etc) The patterns repeat. The stories repeat. There is nothing new under the stars, but that doesn't mean its not worth telling. The lens matters. The words matter. Sometimes, you can kill someone with five words instead of seven.

Austin Walker (Waypoint, Friends at the Table) jesus fuck i owe Austin so much. Fuck 'good representation' if you have multiple instances of a group then no one person has to stand in for the whole. Make people messy. Analog is more satisfying than digital. All mech shows are about bodies. You can make it spiritual without it being religious. Utopia is a process, utopia is a process, the work will never be done but the work is good. When we don't see ourselves in the art around us, we will treat a famine like a feast and starve ourselves. Don't be afraid of a beautiful monologue. Make the voice distinct, make it count. People are vulgar and poetic.

Josh Sawyer (LOTS of games, esp Fallout New Vegas) Think about things! Build the world! Make it tactile, make the audience able to touch it and taste it. Come up with a weird idea and then stalk that idea for forty nights until you're in a new and weird place. Bring other people there.

sonnetstuck (Detective Pony) There is no such thing as Too Weird. There is no such thing as Too Deep. But have fun with it, for god's sake.

LightGetsIn (a lot of v good TDF fanfic) Literally one of the most important lessons I ever learned from a piece of fiction was from their fic Cross, and it was about the limited scope of character knowledge. I am obsessed with close third-person perspective. I write it almost exclusively. LGI taught me that every single character you write, each of them sees the world in a unique way. The language they would use, the details they would miss, how they interpret something that feels obvious to you. Make certain each character you write is truthful to how THEY would see the world and take care not to infused them with YOUR knowledge too much.

Kunihiko Ikuhara (Revolutionary Girl Utena) I'll never put it into words. The foundation was poured here.

Richard Siken (Crush, War of the Foxes) I don't know if I had words until Siken gave them to me. If you ever read a story of mine and go "wait, is that--" yes. The answer is yes. My copies of Crush and WotF are heavily dogeared and I rely on them to translate the world. I owe Siken so much.

Joseph Fink & Jeffrey Cranor (Welcome to Night Vale) hahaha god. I learned self-respect. I learned to stop being afraid. I learned there were people like me. I learned a lot of technical tricks, the way to form sentences, how to make an audience see what you're not saying, how to write Theme-first. Fink and Cranor taught me words as talismans, and that's in SO MUCH of my work it's absurd. Invocation, baby. Everything you make says something, so make it good. Be fucking weird with it. Art is communication, so what do you want to say?

Pete Wentz (Fall Out Boy) /grins. I learned how to communicate between Artist and Audience. And that there are many forms of love, and one is how wonderful it is to have the key to someone's heart and still break the windows on your way in, just for fun. You're the antidote to everything except for me. Mythologize yourself. Be loud.

Christopher McQuarrie (Edge of Tomorrow, Mission Impossible 4-8) HOW THE FUCK DOES HE DO THAT? I'LL LET Y'ALL KNOW WHEN I FIGURE IT OUT.

my beloved mother tried to tease me about being into Tom Cruise and accidentally unlocked a TED Talk about McQuarrie and how he structures stories and what I'm trying to learn and decipher from him.

she mentioned it's funny that I never went to school for this stuff, which is fair tbh. I honestly have no idea if I got a BA or whatever in English if I would have been taught about all this. Alas, that was never in the cards, so I've built my own lesson plan over the years. I think it's gone p well.

I consider my teachers....

Richard Siken and Ann Carson

Austin Walker (god I owe him a Lot)

Italo Calvino

Mark Z Danielewski

Joseph Fink and Jeffrey Cranor (but more the latter imo)

Jim Butcher (you can learn a lot from negative examples)

Steven Moffat (NEGATIVE EXAMPLES)

Josh Sawyer

Pete Wentz (tho not how you'd assume)

Hideo Kojima (SIGHS)

Kunihiko Ikuhara

sonnetstuck

and currently? Yeah, Chris McQuarrie

All of these are people I've learned something important from and that thumbprint is on my work. I like it. Synthesis is a fun art.

#talking about writing #long post

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bulletnotestudies · 3 years ago

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Winter is here and it's time for our Winter Reading Challenge book recommendations ❆

for each prompt, we’re bringing 4 books into the spotlight, as well as giving you some additional recs because we simply couldn’t settle for just four great reads!

Investigations of a Dog by Franz Kafka

'If I think about it, and I have the time and inclination and capacity to do so, we dogs are an odd lot.' How does a dog see the world? How do any of us? In this playful and enigmatic story of a canine philosopher, Kafka explores the limits of knowledge.

The Veldt by Ray Bradbury

A science fiction short story about a family that has trouble with their technologically advanced house. As the parents are getting more worried about the nursery - a virtual reality room- their children are getting more and more attached to it. (blurb by our wonderful @fluencylevelfrench)

The Anthropocene Reviewed by John Green

A collection of essays by John Green, in which he reviews select topics from the human-centered anthropocene on a five star scale, connecting each of them to his own life as a sort of autobiography. (blurb by our amazing @tungumalaast)

In Praise of Shadows by Jun'ichirō Tanizaki

Tanizaki offers an ode to Japanese aestheticism. A stream of thoughts with elegant prose, jumping from architecture to dinner plates, from busy streets to dark alcoves, from black lacquer to bright eyes, redefining the beauty of shadows. (blurb by our brilliant @smallfrenchstudyblr)

ADDITIONAL RECS BELOW THE CUT:

The Cask of Amontillado (Edgar Allan Poe)

The Turn of the Screw (Henry James)

The Sadeian Woman (Angela Carter)

The Birds (Daphne Du Maurier)

The Breakthrough (Daphne Du Maurier)

Empress Of Salt And Fortune (Nghi Vo)

No One Is Too Small to Make a Difference (Greta Thunberg)

Whose Story is This (Rebecca Solnit)

Bitch Doctrine (Laurie Penny)

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noxiousaffection · 2 years ago

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dol school love interests + wren and alex and what i think their favorite childhood series would have been

Robin: Magic Tree House

A Series of Unfortunate Events was a good contender, but it just hit too close to home. Don’t get them wrong, the books were good, but if they wanted to read about a miserable orphan coping with a shitty caretaker, they’d just write an autobiography.

Thoroughly read through every single book in the series, not just once or twice, but eight times. They could probably recite whole passages from memory. Orphans, especially under Bailey’s care, aren’t afforded entertainment, thus find ways to dissociate from their miserable existence busy their minds. Robin would have lost it years ago without these books.

It was pure chance that they discovered this particular series. Specifically, they selected a book at random from their middle school library, which also just so happensd to be the first of the series.

Whitney: Harry Potter

Now this may come to as a surprise, but Whitney is a diehard Harry Potter fan. I can feel it in my bones. However, let’s make one thing clear, this is not, nor will ever be, common knowledge. Even juvenile Whitney had a reputation to uphold, even if that reputation was just of him being an insufferable, half-pint delinquent.

Owns an abundance of merch, none of which they openly display. As if they’re into that bippity boppity boo bullshit, they’re not a nerd. Shut up before they make you. Now, if you were to somehow find your way into their closet, you may that it stores anything but clothes.

Vehemently loathes the golden trio, Harry Potter himself more specifically. Any clown foolish enough to express fondness for that assfuck orphan, his brain dead dog, and the know-it-all bitch within Whitney’s ear shot shall find themself befallen a great travesty.

Kylar: Warrior Cats

Talk about a fanatic; this is no mere phase, it’s a life long commitment. When you enter a relationship with Kylar, you also enter a non-negotiable relationship with their precious books. Has been attached to this series since primary school and will continue to be for the foreseeable future.

Randomly makes various cat noises. (i.e. hisses at people who get too close to you, meows for your attention, purrs when you give them affection, etc.) Do it back. Seriously, do it. Instantly turns them on.

Unironically calls you their mate.

Please roleplay with them. Please.

Somehow always got a hold of every book before release. Their parents aren’t afraid to abuse their power for their precious baby.

Has not and will not ever read a single page of Erin Hunter’s spin-off series Survivor. Canines are the enemy; they’re no traitor.

Sydney: Dear America

Honestly, I remember very little about these books, but if what little memory remains stand to be true, then I just know little Sydney was obsessed. Outside of the temple, their passion for these historical works of fiction remains unparalleled even to this day.

For as long as they’ve been a library assistant, the series never seems to be available to be checked out. Sydney denies all allegations.

Owns a hardback copy of every single book, spin-offs included.

Wren: Goosebumps

In truth, Wren isn’t much of a reader (never having finished even a single book outside of school), but these books hold a special place in their heart.

Each book is the perfect length for this young smuggler’s near nonexistent attention span; a reliable source for those short bursts of dopamine they crave.

It’s not that they don’t like reading, per say, just that they’re dyslexic. Reading becomes a chore when you’re chasing words down on a page.

Their favorite books of all time would have to be Go Eat Worms and The Egg Monster From Mars. I have no good explanations for these, just vibes and a dash of projection.

Alex: Captain Underpants

I’m not quite sure how they first got a hold of the series, but they were hooked almost instantaneously. Their parents were more than happy to fund their latest fascination.

They hate reading, but they can get behind comics. They much prefer pictures to words and comics are chock-full of pictures.

If given the chance, I imagine they would have enjoyed Diary of A Wimpy Kid just as much.

Nowadays, the only thing Alex reads is the shampoo bottle label when they’re taking a shit.

#dol #degrees of lewdity #robin the orphan #whitney the bully #kylar the loner #sydney the faithful #wren the smuggler #alex the farmhand #school love interests #headcanons #writing is hard #:sob:#just.nox

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ribcagecarnival · 3 years ago

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NO. 7 (ON VILLAINY)

2021 may have begun with Olivia Rodrigo controlling the narrative, but it may very well end with Joshua Bassett at the wheel.

I’ll put the usual disclaimers--I don’t know any of these children personally, and I don’t know what actually went down behind the scenes at the turn of the last decade when a supposed love triangle supposedly fractured the hearts and egos of all involved and led to some midlevel Internet drama which ultimately took a backseat to the genuine article--Sour, the 18-year-old Rodrigo’s record-shattering debut LP. In case you missed it: Rodrigo and Bassett started dating in secret while playing an onscreen couple in a Disney+ High School Musical spinoff, Bassett broke up with Rodrigo because of their age difference - he’s almost 21 - and in a suspiciously short amount of time began dating and cutely posting with 22-year-old Sabrina Carpenter, another artist and Disney alum. Teenage digital sleuths searched for Easter eggs in the style of Rodrigo’s biggest influence, Taylor Swift, while I became consumed with the parallel’s between Rodrigo’s experience and my own--feeling disproportionately large affection for men who can never reciprocate, drowning in insecurity over the Eurocentric beauty standard that makes being cast aside in favor of a fair-skinned blonde take on an extra sharp edge, splashing the thinly veiled narrative of my heartbreak across the web. That, instead of the logistics and timeline of the real people involved, was my Met Gala.

The culture-defining “drivers license” was Sour’s lead single, and its chokehold on the popular imagination has persisted even though it dropped way back in January. Perhaps the only narrative powerful enough to displace was the tale at the center of Taylor Swift’s Red rerelease, the storied ten-minute (and explicit!) version of “All Too Well” that did its own record-breaking and spawned an endless scroll of TikTok speculation about what the scarf really means and what Jake Gyllenhaal’s publicist must be doing right now. Again, I’m less concerned with what actually happened--it’s none of my business anyway--and more with what it means for every young woman who’s ever fallen for a withholding, condescending older guy. (Admittedly though I’m concerned with the scarf. I totally thought the scarf was a metaphor. Apparently it’s a real scarf and he actually stole it AND THEN WORE IT? AND WAS PHOTOGRAPHED IN IT? Dude. Major party foul.)

It’s worth noting that Taylor Swift, like many songwriters of her ilk of all genders, has dated fewer songwriters than non-songwriters. Even though John Mayer famously used “Paper Doll” as a late retort to “Dear John,” there are few examples of musical rebuttal to the Taylor Swift Cinematic Universe. Frankly, I don’t have strong feelings about that either way. While I’m ravenous for “Style (Taylor’s Version) (feat. Harry Styles),” I will be able to go on living if it doesn’t happen. I’ve come to expect that musical explorations of relationships will flatten and distort the facts; I accept them as autofiction rather than pure autobiography; I listen knowing I will never understand the story that inspired it completely.

Enter Joshua Bassett, on the precipice of dropping a three-song EP that seems to be the auditory equivalent of a “reply all.”

Bassett has been teasing each of the three tracks on TikTok; the first one I saw opened with the line “my label said to never waste a crisis.” Clearly he’s going for directness. The songs seem to tackle hate, regret, defiance, fear--it’s a sort of anti-apoplexy, choosing to write instead of fight or fly. It’s apparent that he wants to have this conversation on his own terms. When Saturday Night Live spoofed “drivers license,” Bassett took the sharpest line at his own expense and turned it into merch (if you look up “my bitch ex Gina is Joshua Bassett,” a link to a long-sleeve bearing the slogan on his website appears). But aside from that admittedly hilarious marketing move, and posting vague messages of support about Rodrigo’s success, he’s remained quiet. His own release earlier this year didn’t seem related to Rodrigo’s aside from timing, and his public persona has been more about Harry Styles than his relationship status. Sabrina Carpenter, the “blonde girl,” released her own confusing addition to the chaos with “Skin,” which, in addition to being bizarrely braggadocious, lacked the precision and pathos of Rodrigo’s work. But now, Joshua Bassett has decided it’s his time to speak.

Bassett is much harder to paint as a villain than Gyllenhaal. The main reason is that the couple split apart on Rodrigo’s Sour is comprised of two young people, whereas the narrative on Red is about an older man who should have known better than to get involved with a girl who was newly 21. Additionally, Sour seems to traffic in gray areas--“you didn’t cheat, but you’re still a traitor,” “and I just can’t imagine how you could be so okay now that I’m gone,” “I guess the therapist I found for you, she really helped.” Compare that, then, with the details unraveled by the ten-minute version of “All Too Well” - “I’ll get older but your lovers stay my age,” “you call me up again just to break me like a promise,” “any time now, he’s gonna say it’s love, you never called it what it was.” In my view, part of the enjoyment of Sour was how much pain you can feel even if the other person isn’t an outright villain. It’s about how there is no way good or fair way to break someone’s heart, how seeing your ex with someone new can sting no matter how much time passes. What’s compelling, then, is Bassett writing his half of the story, grappling with the guilt of breaking the heart of someone he genuinely cared for, the limits of grace when you, too, are a child trying to love and be loved, and the world is hell-bent on calling you the problem. Admittedly, I thought back to a failed almost-relationship of my own, when my subtweets about the grief wounded the person who left me. Time has passed and we are friends and we both finally see each other for who we are--not egomaniacs, not dreams or ideals, but people.

I don’t know what I’ll ultimately think of the new Joshua Bassett project. But I think its entry into the cultural zeitgeist will force a conversation about relationships that we’ve been unable to have. For so long, people--largely women--were manipulated, abused, and broken by traumatic relationships, and the people carrying out that abuse were left unchecked. With the #MeToo movement, it has become a lot harder to dispute the pain caused by those kinds of relationships. But now the collective consciousness is failing to imagine anything beyond the binary of abuse vs. not abuse, criminal vs. legal. There is pain outside of trauma; there is trauma at scale; there is regret and there is harm and there is heartbreak. Maybe, just maybe, one day we will have room in our hearts and our culture for people to fall and to fail and then, eventually, to try again.

#joshua bassett #olivia rodrigo #sour #taylor swift #jake gyllenhaal #jensen mcrae #jensenmcrae #ribcagecarnival #ribcage carnival #songwriting #text #words #rolling stone #teen vogue

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ziracona · 8 months ago

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You guys are terrible people!!! He ruined my life and broke my heart first yes by stealing my crush and cutting me out of the book deal for a book I had the idea for and was co-writing, but then his life fell apart!!! He was homeless and broke and his boyfriend dumped him and rebounded to me despite having been one of the 2 people who convinced him to cut me out in the first place, I invite the man to our wedding less than a year after he’s been dumped, and he fights for his life to make it across the country in time. Only to find out I’m the one marying his ex and I got a book deal with his ex publisher after he got dumped despite the fact said ex publisher was the /other/ person who convinced him to cut me out and ruin my life. He’s living on the street. We go to vegas and my drunk ass loses 10,000 dollars and he gets lucky and makes the first money his homeless ass has had since his life fell apart, but he finds me about to get shot over a gambling debt and literally buys my life for me because we used to be best friends and loses everything, he doesn’t object to the wedding, and he writes an autobiographical novel about the experience to try and salvage his dying career. His ex publisher refuses to publish despite their contract bc he doesn’t like him and finds him unmarketable with the number of publishing world enemies he’s made, and convinces me I should publish it under my name. He protests at losing his reputation and chance at a career and having me publish his autobiography as if it’s about me, and points out he saved my life and I’m stabbing him in the back here, but gives in after being strong armed and sings a settlement for it because he doesn’t want to be homeless. I am plagued by nightmares and guilt over this and it wasn’t my idea, but I still did it to him. He ruined my life first, but not to this degree, and he literally saved mine after. Now I’m going on a book tour about this book he wrote about his life, getting famous and loved over it, and he wants me dead for stealing the love of his life, his career, and his life story, he’s gone insane with betrayal and grief after trying as hard as a bitch can to atone for his own mistakes, and you want me to SHOOT him??? Like I get it homicide is extreme but he’s like, /destroyed/. He needs help. SHOOT HIM? For THIS???? I will jump off a roof first: NO.

So I’m playing Sometimes Always Monsters-

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csykora · 3 years ago

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hi! i'm sorry to bother you, i was wondering if you could rec a few books on the russian 5 / soviet hockey in general? language does not matter, english or russian is fine (pref. english so i can throw them at friends but either work). your posts are the best thing on this site.

Thank you, that’s a great question! I go back to first-person accounts for stories about the players themselves and use a lot of non-book materials for facts like tournaments and statistics, so most of the these will be autobiographies, but there are a couple more general books too.

Please let me know which if any of them you read and what you and your friends think!

I'd recommend anybody start with Igor Larionov’s 1990 book, “Larionov” (originally written in English, but I believe also available in Russian).

It’s a fast read (150 pages). You can dive in, spend an hour with your new best friend Igor in the bathroom at a party listening to him spilling his feelings and relationship drama, and get up to speed on what/who you need to know.

Igor at that age is funny, insecure, over the top, and telling (sometimes on purpose, sometimes not) about his pain. There are bits that might make you want to hold up a finger and ask if he’s sure a conversation went down like that or if maybe his friends remember some things differently--those are some of the bits that made me look for more books.

He writes more on the psychological weight of his experiences, but does discuss some of the physical abuses (more of that is in Fetisov’s book, which I’ll get to below.) It’s one of the most intimate portraits of Viktor Tikhonov—Larionov admits to taking notes on his coach just like his coach did on him. In that sense, it is radically different than the books and articles I’ve read by North Americans.

(Note that he talks about disordered eating, from the perspective of someone who at that time believed this was positive. The passages where he describes his own and his teammates’ diets can be difficult to read. Consider reading Alyonka Larionova’s essay in the Athletic after; it’s not an easy read either, but I found it reminded me there’s the possibility of change and healng even for older people from generational trauma.)

Then try either:

Home Game, Ken Dryden, 1989 (English), the chapter “No Final Victories”

A lot of Canadian men have read Ken Dryden books and thought, ’if I’m looking down anyway, why not navel-gaze about the meaning of life and measure my dick?’ This is, I think, not his fault. He’s writing from a very Canadian perspective, but he’s quite good at writing about that perspective and its gaps.

In this chapter he talks about what Canadian players or the public thought they knew about the Soviets between the 70s and ’89. It lays out a thorough, engaging play-by-play of how Larionov, Fetisov, and others worked toward leaving, and is a nice balance for the raw Igor experience.

This is one of the most popular all-time hockey books, so it’s worth looking for it in your library if you want to just read that chapter.

The Russian Five, Keith Gave, 2018, about 300 pages

I like the heart behind this book. There’s good information in it. Keith Gave wrote short, quick, newspaper and radio sports-news for 15 years—he has a deep knowledge of the Red Wings not just on the ice but as an organization, a very interesting personal adventure story, and a sort of eagerness to understand and empathize with the Russian players.

It’s his first time doing historical research or writing a book, so I do think he has trouble telling the things you need to know in the order you need to know them in order to care about them, if you don’t already have a good sense of the timeline.

Hard to find but keep an eye out for:

The Red Machine, Lawrence Martin, 1990

A much longer discussion of Soviet hockey focused on the national team from the early twentieth century to 1989. Has more context, vignettes, and details on the backstory of the ’70s/early 80s team and life at the Soviet training compound than many other books in English.

It’s widely cited by other books but it’s out of print and a bit rare—I think I might have just bought the only copy that was up for sale this year, so I’ll post about it in more detail when I can!

Russian options:

Овертайм, Slava Fetisov, 1998, reprinted in 2016 (Russian), about 400 pages

This is where the really rough details are. Fetisov writes about his childhood, life in CSKA, and leaving. He mostly talks about his own life, rather than saying much about other players, but includes lots of little details about daily life and how it was intertwined with his friends. He has time to get a lot more detailed about the physical strain of training than Larionov’s book, including injuries, players who died in training, the deaths of his brother and injury of Konstantiov in car accidents, and the corporal punishments and other violence, including the time he alleges Tikhonov arranged to have him tortured by police.

I think his writing is very evocative and enjoyable to read, so that helps, at least.

(It’s a bit hard to find, but if you have access to a Russian library or second-hand store, keep an eye out. It was re-released as part of a series in 2016, which is after he talked with Alexei Kasatonov and became official BFFs again, so I don’t know if the text was updated at that point.)

Tretiak: the Legend, Vladislav Tretiak, 1987 (originally written in Russian, but widely available in English!)

This one’s very interesting to think about the psychology/culture of Soviet players. Tretiak writes heartbreakingly about his own personal experiences, especially his relationships with older players and his relief at retirement. But there are also a lot of ‘missing’ details that probably reflect how he wrote it before Larionov publicly discredited the system—he only writes quite vague positive things about Coach Tikhonov, which are completely different from how he speaks now.

Хоккей в моем сердце, Boris Mikhailov, reprinted 2016 (Russian)

I will never come up with a book title as good as Boris Mikhailov’s ‘Hockey In My Heart’.

Mikhailov is very witty and sharp. While he doesn’t tend to talk about the details of his conflicts with Tikhonov, he has great little stories about lots of the people in Soviet hockey. He also played and coached in St. Petersburg and smaller regions as well as Moscow, so he has some interesting information on the contrasts.

Viktor Tikhonov: Life in the name of hockey by Tatiana Tikhonova

Sasha Mogilny once commented that the only people who could stand Tikhonov were his wife and his dog, “and I don’t know how they do.” Would you like to read his wife’s book of pictures of him with the dog? Would you like to read about how she thinks Tatiana Mikhailova is a bitch, which immediately makes Mikhailova seem cool as hell? Try this book.

Xрустальные люди/ Crystal People, Stanislav Gridasov

A detailed portrait of the hockey community in Saratov (where the young Boris Mikhailov played before CSKA). Completely different than the rich Moscow system, it seems like a great counterpoint, showing the regional tensions in the Soviet Union. I was just recently tipped off to this, but you can find excerpts of in English in Bruce Berglund’s new 2020 book The Fastest Game in the World: Hockey and the Globalization of Sports, which itself looks pretty good.

#I'm...trying to talk my friend into a book podcast #I have a couple more I haven't had a chance to read even an excerpt from but look promising; I'll update

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lacrimosathedark · 4 years ago

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Hamilton Inaccuracies/Corrections (because why not?)

Okay so, I saw a post on reddit that was like, “what’s some inaccuracies in Hamilton off the top of your head?” and I got a whole bunch...and then I had to double check to make sure if I was right...and I’m pretty long-winded...and now I have this 5,000ish word monstrosity. And apparently you can only post 1000 characters at a time on reddit. Laaaaame. So here’s some Hamilton facts I’ve gathered in my brain. Since it was kinda off the top of my head despite being so long, it’s kinda vague in some places, so if anyone wants to expand on anything (or correct me if I oopsed somewhere) please do! Though nicely please.

Also I am also awful at citing things, but I know I learned some of this from @john-laurens and @ciceroprofacto so thank you.

LET’S BEGIN!

Act 1

Rachel Faucette was not a prostitute, but she was a “whore” in the sense that she did what she fucking wanted with her body. During her first marriage she may or may not have been sleeping around, but she refused to stay with John Lavien, her husband, anymore. So he had her arrested. And he could do that. Because patriarchy and theocracy. And she was essentially put in solitary confinement. You can see why she tried to leave, right? She tried to get their marriage annulled or get a divorce. I forget what the issue was but she couldn’t and eventually she just moved to another island where she met James Hamilton.

The intro song makes it seem like Alexander was an only child. He actually had an older brother, James Jr., but he kinda fucked off after their mother died, working and taking care of himself. They also had an older half-brother Peter Lavien, but I don’t think they really knew him other than as the son of their mother’s abusive ex who took everything from them when she died. John Lavien was able to do that because when Rachel was with James Hamilton, she had not been able to get legally divorced from him so she wasn’t really married to James Hamilton, so James Jr. and Alexander were illegitimate ie bastards. He was an asshole. I don't think Peter had anything against the Hamiltons, but I think he grew up to be a Loyalist so. He actually made some trouble in South Carolina for Henry Laurens, John's dad! But I think I read somewhere he also left money for Alex and James Jr. In his will, which is sweet.

This is more visual since it’s not specified in the song, but in the show, Hamilton’s cousin mimes hanging himself. Peter Lytton’s cause of death if I recall was inconclusive, but he was in his bed and there was a lot of blood. So, yeah, he didn’t hang himself.

Alexander did not punch the bursar. However he did return to Princeton later during the war and blew a canon through the school and apparently decapitated a painting of King George lololol. He was under orders, but yknow. Probably felt pretty good after he was rejected for accelerated courses. He wasn’t the only bastard rejected, though! Ben Franklin’s bastard son was too. The guy in charge of admissions, Witherspoon, hated bastards as a concept and Princeton was a very religious school at the time I believe.

It may have been the plan by Aaron and Esther Burr for Aaron Jr to graduate Princeton, but like, he couldn’t really be sure of that? He was like 2 years old when they died, and his older sister Sally was 4 I believe, maybe 5.

Hercules Mulligan met Alex in 1772. His older brother Hugh knew Alex’s old employer in St. Croix and helped him get to mainland America. Alex and Hercules lived together for a long while, and Hercules is actually who got him interested in the revolution.

John Laurens was in England in 1776. He wouldn’t meet Hamilton and Lafayette until he accepted his post as Washington’s aide-de-camp upon his return in August of 1777.

Lafayette couldn’t have met Hamilton before August 1777 because that’s when he met Washington, and he was appointed as a volunteer to the Continental Army only a week prior, and before that he had been in France. But Lafayette later declared their relationship to be like that of brothers, Alexander his closest connection in the states besides Washington.

Lafayette admired and absolutely adored Laurens and they were besties, but neither of them knew Mulligan. They may have met in passing, or heard about him from Hamilton, but nothing more.

“Lafayette” was actually a nickname based on his title of “Marquis de la Fayette”. In his autobiography, he wrote: “It’s not my fault I was baptized like a Spaniard, with the name of every conceivable saint who might offer me more protection in battle.” I’m glad he thought it was funny at least. His name is Marie-Joseph Paul Yves Roch Gilbert du Motier, Marquis de la Fayette.

Hercules Mulligan is not known to fuck horses.

The Revolution had already sorta started. Actually, Hercules and Alexander had been part of local militias before 1776.

This is more of a miscommunication since the actors are close in age, though the lyrics try to get it across. There’s a reason Mulligan says he’s got the others “in loco parentis”. In 1776 Hamilton and Lafayette would have been 19, Laurens would have been 22, and Mulligan would have been 36.

I think we all know “Laurens, I like you a lot” does not cover the scope of their relationship but that’s rather self explanatory so unless someone asks I’ll leave it at that. And for other clarifications. But at the very least I’ll share this: Anyone who saw them knew they were like attached at the hip (without knowing how attached *winkwonk*) and you could almost always contact one through the other. Laurens was notoriously bad at answering letters, to Hamilton too (and Alex did bitch about it because he is insecure and needs love), but it became quickly known he got back to Hamilton fastest so people would be like “Tell Laurens I said hi!” or “Hey, I need to get these to Laurens, you send them to him.” Which is hilarious. I just imagine Alexander going, “Why me?”

While all of them are Revolutionaries, Laurens is the only one you could solidly call an abolitionist, and Mulligan’s even shaky on the manumission part. He was supposedly part of the Manumission Society Hamilton helped start, but Mulligan also personally owned slaves and was never known to have freed them (One helped him with spy shit. His name was Cato!). In fairness, Hamilton and Lafayette wholeheartedly agreed with Laurens, and Hamilton was the biggest supporter of his battalion plan, and both of them did try to continue working towards equality after the war, but it was never the top priority for either of them and their lives kinda went to hell, so it fell to the wayside. Lafayette actually did some nifty stuff worth looking at, and Hamilton might have tried to keep one of John Lauren’s freed men from Henry Laurens! But as slavery stuck around for a while, it clearly wasn’t anything significant.

Angelica would meet and befriend Thomas Jefferson in Europe, but she would never manage to convince him to put women in a sequel because he’s a huge misogynist and told her in multiple letters that politics isn’t for women and I think he deserves a shoe up his southern backside. Side note, it always bothered me that Lin played up the misogyny in the musical. I mean, yeah, all of them would be misogynists compared to us, but for their time, Hamilton wasn’t so bad. If there was anyone to play up misogyny with, it was Jefferson, because he would tell Angelica for years and years that politics could never make women happy, and that the women in France were foolish for trying etc.. Hamilton would actually discuss politics with Angelica frequently and openly. And there’s a proto-feminist in the cast that was never recognized—Aaron Burr! He respected Theodosia Sr. as an equal and she was his most valuable political ally, and he made sure Theodosia Jr. got the same education any boy of her time would have. He actually respected women to a decent degree. Not to say he wasn't as much of a ho as Hamilton cuz yeah that's accurate (but they were both disaster bisexuals more on Burr's sexuality later)

Farmer Refuted was an essay Hamilton wrote arguing against Samuel Seabury's posts. They weren't shouting in the public square(but Lin got the sass right. I love his face when Hamilton and Seabury are fighting over the podium). Seabury was also really really old, not young and cute like Thayne, hence the line about "mange". Blech.

General Montgomery didn’t take a bullet in the neck, it was a grapeshot from a canon in his head (and his thighs), but close enough I guess. Side note: Burr actually served a short interim on Washington’s staff, but only for like 10 days because they hated each other lolol.

Alexander didn’t bring Laurens, Mulligan, or Lafayette to Washington. Lafayette joined up with the Continental Army in 1777 and quickly convinced them he wasn’t like the other French nobles; he was a glory-seeking kid with a boner for America (for some reason???). Laurens was requested by Washington to join his military family and he arrived also in August 1777 just after Lafayette. Like previously stated, Mulligan was doing shit even before Hamilton did.

Alexander would not have been in charge of spy shit (though may have been somewhat involved). Washington had people like Mulligan for that, who actually saved Washington a few times. But also, the "King’s men who might let some things slide" was the tactic Mulligan used. He was actually very charming, and his wife was very high in British society and he was a skilled tailor, so they were thought of well among the redcoats, and he got a lot of information through chatting with his customers. He also could usually smooth-talk his way out of trouble. Actually, Mulligan blended in so well, when the war was over, people in the city wanted him out cuz they thought he was a Loyalist. So George fucking Washington paid him a visit and commissioned I think a coat from him, and that cleared that up. He got a LOT of business after that.

Alexander would not be Washington’s right hand man, or at least, not his only one if Lin was using that to mean aide-de-camp. In that case, Laurens would also be Washington’s right hand man, along with many men not named in the musical.

John Laurens may have been reliable with the ladies (comes with the territory of being hot, rich, and a perfect gentleman), but he most certainly didn’t want to be. His father noted, rather proudly at the time, that as a young teenager he expressed no interest in girls. John was also married by 1780, and at least Alexander knew. (he told John he'd found out in the well-known April 1779 letter. You know... “Cold in my professions...find me a wife...the length of my nose...” That one.) Because John apparently didn't tell people he was married. Laurens. Sweetheart. Get. Your. Shit. Together.

John also would not be at this ball. February 1779 to March 1780 he is fighting down south, and this ball was early 1780.

The tomcat thing may be half true. Martha Washington did supposedly name a cat Hamilton, but it was an affectionate thing. The slang tomcat meaning ho wasn’t a thing at that time, so it couldn’t be named to tease Alex for his promiscuity. I believe this was one of the many things John Adams made up to slander Hamilton.

Hamilton and Eliza had met before 1780. They had met once two years prior at a dinner her father had hosted. Also, Hamilton had been courting her friend Kitty Livingston, and his friend and fellow aide Tench Tilghman had been attempting to court Eliza, and they’d actually done at least one sort-of double date (which is adorable). So this shouldn’t have been the first time they’d seen each other. Could still be when they fell in love, though, since they started courting after this. Which is cute to think about.

Speaking of Tench and Eliza! I don't remember when this took place but Tilghman journaled it, he went out on something of a hike with a few ladies and they got to a cliff. Of course, he had to help the girls climb up. Except Eliza who started climbing by herself like a natural to the bewilderment and likely horror of the other ladies. Elizabeth Schuyler was a bamf okay?

Of course everyone knows by now, Angelica was married before Eliza. During the Winter’s Ball, she’d already eloped with Jack Carter aka John Barker Church and run away to Boston.

Their courtship was not that fast. Not like, weeks. More like months. Fun fact, Eliza is the only of the five (yes FIVE) Schuyler sisters who didn’t elope and actually got her parents permission! But here’s a heartbreaking fun fact: while Alex was courting Eliza, Laurens was taken prisoner and then on probation. He wasn’t allowed to leave the state of Pennsylvania. He was mentally in a very dark place. Alex kind of procrastinated telling Laurens about Eliza, didn’t say he was courting anyone until they were already engaged.

I can't leave this alone if I'm sad you have to be too. Alex was hella depressed during this time too. Of course he was a soldier so he couldn't see Eliza as much as he'd have liked. On top of that, he kept pushing for an exchange for John and kept getting rejected because they couldn't show preference for him. And then Laurens was sending him very few letters, of course, and the ones he did send were very depressed, even suicidal sounding. He had to work while dealing with that. He had to keep begging Eliza to write to him to be reassured that she still liked him.

No one could show up for Hamilton for the wedding. Some sources say fellow aide James McHenry showed up, but he’s the only one. Alexander even invited his deadbeat dad, offered to pay all his travel expenses and everything, guess how that turned out. So Eliza’s side of the hall was packed and his was empty. God, can you imagine how sad that is?

Another heartbreaking fun fact! John Laurens was out of probation and could have made it to the wedding, was invited (Hamilton, I kid you not, jokingly invited him to a threesome with his new wife in a letter: “I wish you were at liberty to transgress the bounds of Pensylvania. I would invite you after the fall to Albany to be witness to the final consummation.” (emphasis is original to Hamilton. As is the misspelling of Pennsylvania. Yes, seriously.)) and John did not go. Instead he went back to work trying to talk his way out of getting sent as an envoy to France and suggesting Alexander to take his place. You know. His boyfriend who just got married. Sure, he was right that Hamilton was better equipped for the job, but yknow. Another fun fact, one of the guys who voted for John to be the one to go to France was John’s ex-boyfriend Francis Kinloch. Who was a turncoat, and had been a royalist when he and Laurens split. How’s that for some twisty bullshit.

Sorry, this one isn’t about the musical, it’s a tangent, I just got excited about that quote. Both that style of innuendo and the misspelling of Pennsylvania are consistent in Hamilton’s writing. Listening to john-lauren’s podcast about the April 1779 letter can really help you understand how Hammy uses innuendo but also I just love listening to it it’s insightful and hilarious and I love John Laurens but y u do this and my heart hurts for Hamilton but he is also a ho but aNYWAY. As for Pensylvania...well, he kinda made that mistake on an important document. ...It’s The Constitution. He misspelled Pennsylvania on The Constitution. No big deal. Not like something that could haunt his legacy forever. Oh my god I’m so sorry.

Philip Schuyler did have sons. Five in fact. Two of them died pretty young though I think, considering there are three kids in a row named John Bradstreet Schuyler. The other two were named Philip Jeremiah and Rensselaer.

Laurens, Lafayette, and Mulligan were all married before Hamilton. Hercules Mulligan married Elizabeth Sanders in 1773. Lafayette married his beloved Adrienne in 1774. John Laurens was regretfully obliged to marry Martha Manning in 1776.

Sigh. Again with the misogyny. Anyway, I wanted to comment on the marriage as a loss of freedom. From what I can tell, Elizabeth helped Hercules with his spy work at home. John was literally fighting a war across the ocean from his wife, and probably having an illegal affair with Alexander (though to be fair to him, he was kind of running away from Martha because he didn't marry her for love, gosh, there are no winners here). Lafayette absolutely adored his wife but still was also fighting a war an ocean away, and had multiple affairs, at least one with his wife’s blessing. So yeah, losing your freedom with marriage? Bullshit.

Despite where it is in the musical and Eliza singing the beginning, Stay Alive is roughly about Valley Forge, which would be December of 1777 through June of 78. So before the ball and wedding. (Fun fact! A lot of people theorize Valley Forge as when Hamilton and Laurens’ relationship may have escalated into romantic and/or sexual territory. They may have had more privacy, as small temporary buildings were being made to better withstand the cold, and Hamilton was sick a lot during that time and did need tending a lot. West Indian boi did not like Northern winter.) But yeah, Congress being stupid and the army resorting to eating their horses sometimes and not being able to buy food and equipment? All true. It was a real bad winter.

Mulligan wouldn’t have to go back to New York, he never would have left. He remained there as a tailor and a spy throughout the war. He wouldn’t have been traveling with Washington.

Hamilton and Laurens didn't write essays so much as start working out John's battalion plan and writing letters trying to push for it.

This duel happened in 1778, so like. This timeline is so fucky.

Stay Alive makes it seem like Hamilton was the one who wanted to duel Lee, but it was 100% Laurens from the start. The off-Broadway version demonstrates it a bit better. Hamilton was Lauren's second to save his ass. Hamilton had a rough relationship with Washington, but Laurens admired him greatly and would have willingly defended his commander’s honor. John was a Good Boy who always bowed his head to his asshole father, even at first for his battalion plan, but John wouldn’t let even his father talk shit about Washington. Fun fact about this duel, Alex and John were late to the duel because they “got lost in the woods”. Oooookay. Suuuuuuure. And Baron von Steuben was straight. (Fact: Steuben was very gay and pretty much pushed out of Europe for it. And he actually also had challenged Lee! They talked things out before this.)

Aaron Burr was not Charles Lee’s second. His second was a Major Evan Edwards. Lin wanted a parallel with the final duel. To be fair, that was a really cool way to do it and I like it better that way.

Alexander Hamilton could NOT agree that duels are dumb and immature. He was in 10 duel challenges as a participant in his lifetime, 9 of which he was the challenger. One time he challenged two people at once. One time he challenged an entire politcal party apparently. No, I am not kidding. He had a bad day. And I think you know the one time he wasn’t the challenger.

Lee did not yield on the first shot, nor was Laurens satisfied. Lee was pretty much like, “It’s just a flesh wound!” and wanted to go another round and Laurens agreed, but Hamilton and Edwards managed to talk them down. Yes he was shot in the side. But that wasn’t all because Laurens absolutely roasted Lee at his court martial.

Lee: Were you ever in an action before?

Laurens: I have been in several actions; I did not call that an action, as there was no action previous to the retreat.

I love this man. So much. The sass of this man.

We don’t know if Washington was angry about the duel with Lee. We do know that Laurens, and probably Hamilton, had Christmas dinner with him two days later. When Hamilton left, it was because Washington had snapped over a misunderstanding (caused by Lafayette actually, and he really tried to make it better because Lafayette is a sweetheart), and then continued to deny Hamilton the command he requested, and he resigned. It was entirely unrelated to the duel and Laurens. However, the daddy issues are real.

I don’t know if Lafayette went to France for more funds and came back with more guns, but Laurens certainly did! Ben Franklin told him to chill, but he actually got super impatient and ended up supposedly disrespecting and maybe kinda threatening the court, demanding what he needed, and walking out. They were were kind of shocked and impressed into giving more than had been requested. Any existing deities bless John Laurens. I love him.

Lafayette actually nominated his own aide to lead the charge and Hamilton appealed for himself and Washington finally gave in to Hamilton.

Laurens was not in South Carolina. When he finally got back from France, he was sent to Yorktown. He actually was commanding the group Alexander led. (Power couple lol) He also helped with negotiations after the battle. Also, supposedly making the British play ‘The World Turned Upside Down’ on their way out was Laurens’ idea because boy is made of sass and spite.

Henry Laurens would not have sent a letter to Hamilton about John’s death. Even if he would have, he couldn’t. At that time, he’d been locked up in the Tower of London as a prisoner. We have no idea when or how Alexander found out, or who might have told him. We know he wrote to Nathanael Greene on October 25 and Lafayette on November 3 (literally 2 months after Laurens' death), and the mentions of Laurens were very short. It’s thought that he really couldn’t talk about Laurens. People have compared it to the stories of how Benjamin Tallmadge apparently couldn’t hear Nathan Hale’s name without crying.

After Yorktown Alexander resigned and John went down south to flush British troops out of the southern states. His group was ambushed at Combahee River and he decided to charge instead of wait for backup and he died. Many people think it was a combination of his usual recklessness, suicidality, and glory-seeking mixed with a desperation with the war coming to an end. It was such a small skirmish. He deserved better. He left his daughter, Frances, whom he had never met, orphaned, as her mother had died months earlier from sickness. She was adopted by John’s oldest younger sister, also coincidentally Martha Laurens (though married was Martha Laurens Ramsay).

The Levi Weeks case was years later than that, in 1800, though it was alongside Burr. Hamilton actually lost his first trial as a defense lawyer and was not with Burr.

The whole conversation where Hamilton proposes Burr help him write the Federalist Papers is fake. Lin made that up entirely.

John Church’s wealth kinda...varies. He was a gambler. At first, he was actually in quite a bit of debt. He did make it big eventually and he and Angelica moved to Europe. He really didn’t seem to be a lot of fun to most people, but Angelica eloped with him. She chose him against her father’s wishes. I don’t get why Lin kept writing lines saying she didn’t love him, at least at first. He also does this in the cut song Congratulations where she says “I languished in a loveless marriage” bish you eloped wat She also lived as a socialite and was adored by anyone who met her apparently, so like???? da fuq Lin. Didja really do Laurens dirty for these lies or at the very least uncertanties? Could you not prop up that romance without making her say she hates her husband?

Act 2

More of a personality miscommunication. Irl Thomas Jefferson was shy, quiet, and hypersensitive, nothing like how Daveed plays him. If you knew a guy like the real Jefferson in real life you might be endeared to him out of pity or because he seems sweet, but in the short time of a musical that would immediately be read as cold and unlikable. So the best way to portray “this guy is a likable asshole” is to make him loud and made of sass which is what Daveed does magnificently. So, not at all accurate to real Jefferson, but gets the concept of him across.

Thomas was not off getting high with the French. Probably. He was making negotiations for the Revolution. And abusing Sally Hemings (his, at the time, 14 year old slave, who was also his sister-in-law, and 30 years his junior, and was brought along to entertain his daughter). And actually probably chatting up with Angelica!

By the time Philip was 9, he had two sisters, Angelica (7) and his foster/adopted sister Frances Antill (6), but he also had two brothers already, Alexander Jr. (5) and James Alexander (3), with maybe another one on the way since William Stephen would be born next year.

The whole comma thing is backwards. It was Angelica who made the initial mistake. Hamilton pointedly and flirtatiously teased her about it before closing it with “Adieu ma chere, soeur” French for “Goodbye my dear, sister”. So it’s more playful and less lovey dovey in context, so the tone is all wrong. It’s not romantic, it’s teasing and snarky.

Say No To This feels like it’s over quick. The affair lasted a year, not just the summer Eliza was away.

Clermont Street wasn’t renamed until many years later.

I don’t know that Alex has always considered Burr a friend. Irl they weren’t as close, and Hamilton was keenly aware of how slimy Burr could be.

Lafayette was NOT fine. He was imprisoned a lot during the French Revolution, the poor man, and many members of his wife’s family were killed. HOWEVER! Hamilton was not just sitting by. Angelica and her husband did make an attempt to rescue Lafayette, and the Hamiltons fostered Lafayette’s son Georges Washington Lafayette (yes that was his actual name). So Hamilton also did not forget Lafayette.

Not all his defendants got acquitted, obviously. Stop being cocky, Ham.

People comment on how Jefferson whines about Hamilton’s fashion sense while literally dressed in violet velvet. The original plan was to have him in browns, but Daveed is just such a friggin star that they just had to give him something brighter and decided to go with a Prince-inspired look. Originally the browns were going to be representative of his supposed representation of farmers. Though note here: Jefferson’s agricultural representation is much the same as modern Republicans’ rural representation. More for show.

Actually, let's get political for a sec. I've done some research in my hyperfixation and in searches for Hamilton shiz I've ended up stumbling into far-right nonsense and I know how to recognize the degrees of nonsense from years of actually paying attention to it now because this is what I do apparently. Which is weird, right? Lin kinda portrays him like a lefty. Well, here's the thing. Any proud historically educated Republican will tell you that their roots are in the Federalist Party. Which is technically true. What they will neglect to mention is the flip between parties that happened when the Republicans decided to use southerners racism to their advantage in elections. Being subtly racist can get the racists and the non-racists on your side! Yeah, it's gross. Federalists are more like Democrats. The corporatists. They clearly care more about companies and Wall Street, but they put actual action into social progress on rare occasion. Democratic-Republicans are like Republicans, conservatives who don't want social change and rail against it and pretend they aren't for corporate interests while being just as bad as the other guys. But Republicans have a tendency to rewrite history to paint themselves as the good guys, or reclaim things that aren't theirs as their own. Just look at the Civil War! Or...literally just...America I guess. Yikes. But yeah, here's your warning. Don't just go looking at and trusting things labelled Federalist. It likely won't be friendly.

John Adams didn’t fire Hamilton, Hamilton left. Eventually. And this is not the only time this kind of verbal confrontation happens, and not the one that destroys the Federalist Party. That actually happens after the Reynolds Pamphlet. But John Adams hates Alexander Hamilton with the burning passion of a thousand suns and really kinda earns this.

I’m not sure if he specifically called Alex a Creole bastard but I wouldn’t be surprised, there were other similar racist and bastard-related insults. You know the tomcat thing mentioned above. He started the rumor of the affair with Angelica. He accused him of being a rake (male version of whore at the time). He also may have behind closed doors accused him of being a sodomite. His (probably gay) son Charles helped with that one, bringing back rumors from a dinner he had with Hamilton (who he was working for) and John Church because Church joked about Alex being fond of a guy. Adams probably thought working for Hamilton was what made his son gay and alcoholic (Charles was an alcoholic and may have died in part because of that; Hamilton was not an alcoholic, but he supposedly could not hold his drink. He was smol).

Jefferson, Madison, and Burr didn’t accuse Hamilton of speculation. It was James Monroe, Abraham Venable, and Frederick Muhlenberg. Lin wanted to keep consistent representation of the Democratic-Republican party. But anyway, the whole thing went to hell because Monroe sent the letters to Jefferson (or I’ve also heard Monroe gave them to Madison who sent them to Jefferson) who, the spiteful gangly fucker, started spreading rumors because fuck Hamilton, amirite? Hamilton challenged Monroe to a duel over that. And who stopped this duel? Aaron Burr. He gets to be the good guy now and then.

It wasn’t just total strangers that got Alex off the island. He was sponsored by his cousin Ann Lytton and his teacher Reverend Hugh Knox. Also, he was kind of expected to get an education and come back and help out the island...guess what he never did. Oops.

This one I may be wrong, but I’m pretty sure. I think Eliza was upstate with her family when the Reynolds Pamphlet was released, away from Alex. I also know she had recently given birth to their son, William Stephen. A lot of people think Alexander had been keeping that in mind. Eliza had had a miscarriage once before, when she was under a lot of stress and alone and with the kids and he had to be away (Whiskey Rebellion), so some people think he made sure she was surrounded by her family and waited until the child was born to drop this on her, and gave her distance from him if she needed it. At least he knew he fucked up, and he really did love her.

Those weren’t Alexander’s guns. They belonged to John Church.

It was quite some time between Philip’s challenge and the actual duel.

Another age miscommunication; Eacker was 27ish and Philip was 19 when the duel happened. There was a whole 8 years between them!

Eacker didn’t shoot early. Actually, both of them stood staring at each other for a really long time doing nothing. But Philip went to make a move and Eacker shot him.

Alex and Eliza had made up from the Reynolds Pamphlet bullshit before Philip died. When he passed, Eliza was already pregnant with the son they would also name Philip in honor of his older brother.

Hamilton wasn’t really the deciding factor in the election of 1800. But he did say that about Burr and it did help swing the vote somewhat. But also, this was before Philip died. Philip died in 1801.

If a vote is that close, you can’t win in a landslide??? That’s not how words work???? Mister Miranda????? You are a writer??????? Sir???????

Burr actually held a term as Jefferson’s Vice President.

The Burr vs Hamilton Duel was in 1804 and was actually about another election and other things Hamilton was saying about him. Burr was running to be governor of New York and lost but heard about Alexander telling people the things he listed Alexander saying in Your Obedient Servant.

Thayne should not have played Alexander’s doctor. Sydney should have played Alexander’s doctor. Do you know why? Philip and Alexander had the same doctor when they died. Alexander took that doctor with him to the duel. His name was David Hosack.

While there’s evidence to suggest Burr experienced immediate regret (he stepped forward as if wanting to see if Hamilton was okay and supposedly asked after him and wished him well before Alexander passed) in the years that followed, until he was on his death bed, he expressed nothing but neutrality or even pride for having shot Hamilton. The ‘the world was wide enough’ comment could plausibly be entirely made up, and even if it were true, it was supposedly said toward the end of Burr’s life. Burr's life was quite a ride after Alex. He tried to make like his own empire out of Texas, and then of course was tried for treason, but he got out of that, but then everyone hated him for that ON TOP OF already hating him for killing Hamilton, so he had some crazy journey around Europe for a while. He kept a journal, writing entries like letters to Theo. The most notable things I think he writes he'd "been amused for an hour with a very handsome young Dane. Don't smile. It is a male!" which implies maybe Theodosia knew her dad was bi and was at least amused by it? And he spent a while living with Jeremy Bentham, who is generally accepted to have been gay (if you want more Burr gayness look into Jonathan Bellamy and Robert Troup. Troup knew Hamilton too!). Unrelated to his sexuality but I find it important, Burr spent, in modern cash, $40 on a coconut, in his own words, "like an ass." He returned to America eventually. I dont remember if it was before or after his foreign adventures, but his beloved grandson (also named Aaron Burr) died, and then not long after, Theodosia was lost at sea on her way to visit her dad. No one knows what happened to her. It's so sad. Anyway he married a wealthy widow named Eliza, spent all her money on charity, and died the day their divorce was finalized. And Eliza Jumel's divorce lawyer was Alexander Hamilton Jr..

Poor Eliza couldn’t go through all of her husband’s papers. Her son, John Church Hamilton, finished the work for her when she no longer could and put together the biography that inspired Chernow’s that inspired Lin’s musical. (He named a son Alexander and a daughter Elizabeth. He even named one of his sons Laurens! Aw.) And we have come full circle.

The End :33

There’s probably more but that’s what I’ve got. Thanks for reading!

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