#his nose is so ridiculous oh my- 💀

[theoddholloway]

Oh @cosmosoddyssey !!

I have a I’ll something for you…

I’m sorry… 😵

[callofdudes]

Can have funny Headcannons for Ghost, Gaz, Alejandro, and Soaps see their s/o who came back from long mission and they are cover in dirt and mud with very grumpy expression walking pass and saying: “Don’t. Ask. Or Say. Any. Thing.”

Here ya go! 😄

Ghost 💀

Ghost hadn't seen you for a whole month. Your mission was supposed to only have lasted a few weeks, but you were being held up longer than expected and he wasn't getting told why.

Honestly he was a bit worried for you, not having much information on your whereabouts.

Plus this was your first solo mission, it made him even more worried.

He felt relief, utter relief when he was addressed down to the landing strip a couple yards from base. You were on that helicopter. He couldn't wait to see you again.

He waited there, watching the helicopter come in and land, the back ram opening and hitting the ground.

And you came out....

Oh my.

Ghost stared as you tromped down the ramp. Your clothes were ruffled and you were covered head to toe in mud. Sticks in your hair, caked, drying mud on your cheeks. And that scowl. A scowl for the books...

You noticed him and trudged over.

He opens his mouth to speak and you just keep walking. "Don't. Ask. Or. Say. Anything." You hiss angrily.

It didn't take him much time to figure out you had headed straight for the showers. You were in there for over an hour, picking away at the mud and twigs in your hair. Scrubbing yourself clean in every crevice and corner. Shivering when you found leaves and mud places you'd never want it.

Simon looks from you over to some of the soldiers offloading equipment. They shrug, giving him some information and leaving him to his own devices.

He snickered, he could only imagine what happened.

But finally you came out, refreshed and less disgusting.

You redressed in fresh clothes and walked out, spotting Simon leaned against the building entrance. You playfully scowled at him.

"How did it go?" He leaned off the wall and approaches you, slipping his hands around your hips.

You scoff, rolling up his mask and sinking your lips to his, missing him after the exhausting mission.

"You'd never believe me."

He hums, pulling away and kissing your nose. "Try me."

"I'll tell you later. For now, I just need rest."

"Fair enough, I'll let you go then."

"Thank you."

You kiss him again and head off to your bunk to catch some rest. You needed it.

Gaz 🧢

Gaz was excited to have you back. After two weeks finally you were coming home! He was so relieved to have you back it made his heart spark to life.

Unfortunately your trip was delayed so he was waiting out on the tarmac for you a little over 20 minutes.

And then the helicopter arrived. He smiled, ready to welcome you into his loving embrace, kiss you all over and tell you have much he missed you.

His smile disappeared when the lift of the helicopter came down and you walked out.

He most certainly would not be hugging you...

You had an angry scowl, covered in mud and dirt. Some of it still looked fresh. Your gun was jammed and cakes in the stuff.

You walked over when you saw him, face set on one hell of a glare.

"Well-"

"Not. A. Word Kyle Garrick."

Kyle shut his mouth and watched you pass by. Boy, you'd think he was responsible for all that mud.

He wouldn't ask, but he'd help. So he followed you back to the showers at a safe distance - he's not crazy.

You pulled off all your gear and hopped in the shower, growling and whining about all the mud.

Kyle went after you, stepping in behind you and cupping your waist.

"Kyle-!"

"Just miss you." He decides on that, grabbing your shampoo to try and help you wash the mud out. You whine, never able to say no to Kyle's head massages.

"Don't judge me."

"I didn't say anything love." He rinses some mud off your shoulder and kisses it. You sigh, leaning back into him. "Thank you."

Alejandro🎖️

"Anytime love."

"You did look ridiculous though."

You sigh loudly, you couldn't argue that, you probably had.

Alejandro misses you. And you know what happens when Alejandro misses you. He missed his one and only so much. His other half.

But, unfortunately you were out on a mission with Rodolfo. Alejandro trusted his soldiers well, especially you two. Some of his best soldiers, he had no doubt you would do well.

He has gotten word the trucks had picked you up just north of one of the lakes by the building you were raiding. And you were now headed home.

Alejandro was happy to see both of you. To know you were alive and well after four days. (Yes, he's a bit impatient if he isn't on the mission too ☹️)

He was waiting in stance when you both arrived, ready to greet you. He smiles when the door opened. And out stepped Rodolfo.

Oh my.

Rodolfo was absolutely drenched. He was covered in a blanket, his gear stuck with wire and his hair was all out of place.

"Rodolfo." Alejandro greeted him, wrapping his arms around his shivering friend. "What happened??"

Rodolfo shook his head. 'Im sorry colonel, the mission was a dud..."

Alejandro frowned. "Where is y/n, are you both alright??"

Rodolfo nodded.

And sure enough, out you came from the truck. Slathered in mud. Absolutely caked in it. Some of it was still dripping off your uniform. You had a scowl, the scowl Alejandro only saw a few times through your cheery disposition.

You stomped over, arms crossed. Mud all down your body.

"Mi amor-"

"Don't. Say. A. Word. Don't. Ask."

Alejandro shut his mouth right away. You stomped past him toward the showers leaving him a bit dumbstruck.

"Rodolfo, you should go wash up with them, no?"

Rodolfo nodded. "Yes colonel."

Alejandro figured out what had happened from the soldiers and waited till you retired to your room to talk to you. You flopped down on your shared bed and groan, snuggling up to him now that you were clean.

"I'm not mad the mission went bad, if that's on your mind, my little mud monster."

You shake your head. "Just... Hold me. Please?"

Alejandro pulls you into his arms and kisses your head. "Of course mi amor."

Soap 🧼

Today you were back! The sergeant is coming back!! My babe for life is returning!

Johnny skipped along the hallways. After two weeks you were home!! You were home! He'd been worrying sick about you but now he has nothing to fear.

He skipped out across the yard and wandered down to the tarmac where your helicopter was landing.

He couldn't wait to see you again, make out with you until his lips were sore and his jaw locked up.

You stepped off the helicopter and he physically recoiled. It was like he could smell you from there. Oh my goodness you looked awful.

You were covered in drying and dripping mud. You were scowling as you approached him.

"Not. A. Fucking. Word. MacTavish!!" You snap at him.

He blinks at you, whispering, "Damn, you smell bad."

Your eye twitches and you yell in exasperation. Stomping over to the showers. Johnny looks between you and a few recruits who shrugged, too afraid to ask you on the plane.

Johnny falls in line after you and makes a break for the shower where he knows you'll be.

He waits outside for you, smiling when you come out. "Look at you, all nice and clean!"

You roll your eyes and walk over to him, letting his wrap his hands around your waist. "it's good to have my love back, not whatever sludge monster took your place." He grins.

You smack him and press your lips to his, pulling him in. He hums excitedly, pushing for his tongue in your mouth. Lapping and exploring you all over again. He missed you so much.

When you pull away he's panting. "You're so amazing, sludge monster or not."

"Johnny. Shut your mouth and kiss me, I had s long fucking mission, this is the least you could do for me."

"Yeah, you're right." He cups your jaw and begins to kiss you again.

[satisfactionlevel]

⚡️west end year 8 (11/01/25):

I saw the cursed child london year 8 cast again today and made some ridiculously long notes, mainly about scorbus (because i’m obsessed)🆘 i noticed many little things I didn’t see before, so I thought I’d write them down before I forget them!

⚡️act 1:

so much finger twiddling from albus right from the beginning, i love it!

harry and ginny side hugs at the platform were so cute, they were still in so much wonder about their surroundings, it’s like they’re seeing platform 9 3/4 for the first time✨

when ron was doing the whole nose trick with lily jr, ginny gives albus a shoulder squeeze as albus was looking nervous. ginny just gets albus:)

when albus told rose he’s staying in scorp’s compartment, scorp did a fleeting slight smile. he looked like he didn’t believe it 

scorp whispering “slytherin please” during sorting ceremony 

bread scene, albus looked at scorp and puffed his cheeks, like wtf are you doing, and then looked down lol

after scorp said “come to the funeral and be my good friend” albus reached out his arm like he was going to hug scorpius 

they just in general made so much eye contact in moments of uncertainty to assure each other, it’s just the cutest! 

someone sitting behind me gasped when harry he wished albus weren’t his son😭this scene destroys me every time ugh

when scorp tried to climb up the train albus gave him double thumbs up, but scorp failed to get to the top

THEY WERE SO PROTECTIVE OVER EACH OTHER IN THE AMOS SCENE omg 

and when amos said about “undersized teenagers”, scorpius seemed to suddenly be very self conscious about his body, and awkwardly adjusted his tie lol

when amos said “malfoy maybe a voldemort” scorp was hurt and he looked at albus, albus gave him a little smile of reassurance💕

scorpius/harry was screaming, he spat at albus/ron’s face accidentally, and albus/ron wipes his face with his sleeves💀

albus/ron accidentally threw his robe right at his own face after kissing hermione, he was so grossed out. 

⚡️act 2:

scorpius was JEALOUS AF  in the forest💀when delphi was standing between him and albus, blocking scorpius view of albus, he leans to the side and waves at albus. I CANNOT HE’S SO REAL WTF

edge of forest scene when scorp said he checked the daily prophet every day, albus did a tiny smirk. OH GOD HE’S SO OBSESSED WITH SCORPIUS

scrorbus cheering in a weird way because of course they do, they’re scorbus. and after the second cheer, albus mouthed “that’s better” to scorpius 

harry stroking albus’s injured arm in the hospital🥹

staircase ballet was perfect as always. and madame hooch looked so worried about scorpius:( 

staircase scene with scorpius and delphi , after delphi told him “you two belong together” and asked scorpius to find albus, he walked off with a grin and kept doing air fist pumps lol

when they got shushed by the teacher in the library scorpius picked up the book and pointed at it, nodding and pretending to have understood something

library scene monologue. scorpius’s crying and albus’s pained face twitches 😭they were both so broken and vulnerable:(

after they used invisibility cloak, scorpius sat on the chair, hugging himself (kind of) into the tiniest little ball like he wanted to make himself disappear from all the hurt. he didn’t took at albus for a long time. 

scorpius’s little smile when albus said you’re kind to your finger tips (my boy is so precious I wanna die, he need to be protected af all cost)

when they hugged, albus’s face squeezed/crunched up his face with his eyes closed, like he’s in so much pain and regret, but also so relieved. I think he really wanted to feel that moment. 

albus’s cute little laugh after scorpius said consider me engorg-impressed! they’re literally just perfect for each other ughh

I LAUGHED SO MUCH at this: when myrtle said she’s got a soft spot for the potters, albus awkwardly waved at her, and when she said she’s impartial to a malfoy, scorpius looked so scared and tucked in his robe to cover up his chest, like he just got violated by myrtle💀

when scorp emerged cheering from the lake and didn’t see albus, he called albus in a low-pitch,  playful way while laughing, but then immediately became so concerned when albus still didn’t respond😭and his calls became panicked

⚡️act 3:

in draco’s office, droco did the “for voldemort and valour” sign very slowly with a slow voice, he probably heard talks about scorpius doing it in weird ways, and was trying to teach him💀

scorpius’s bent knee bowing to snaps is funny af, he’s fangirlling for real

noticed how the dementor IMMEDIATELY went away after scorpius said albus😭that’s how strong his love for albus is, I literally can’t breathe

again in the lake when scorp hugged albus, albus genuinely looked so happy! my boy loves physical affection, he did a little chuckle too 

also when scorpius screamed harry, albus looked so shocked and confused lol

when McGonagall said about expelling them albus looked immediately at scorpius:(

dorm scene, albus chuckled so much when scorpius was going on about “scorpius the dread-less, malfoy the unanxious”.

when scorpius sat on albus’s bed, albus turned his body towards scorpius, then for a moment, he looked down at their hands on the bed, it’s like he was thinking where to put his hands😭 

rose and gang overhearing the conversation about the alternative reality. rose was upset, james, sitting behind rose, put a hand on her shoulders. james kept fidgeting as if trying to figure out what else he can do to comfort rose. so good to see the sensitive side of james 

i cry at the rose and hermione hug every time 

today it stood out to me about how much fun they genuinely have with each other! and now they make each other laugh all the time!

especially when they were planning different charms to destroy the time turner. they are goofy and make each other laugh so much:)

scorpius looked like he was in disbelief when delphi said albus’s weakness is love. (bruh just believe it☠️)

when delphi put her wand on albus, scorpius tried so hard to stand up from the floor to go to albus, even though he literally just suffered the cruciatus curse moments ago

⚡️act 4:

I cried when Craig died he’s such a cinnamon bun 

also the albus’s finger twiddling kind of got replaced at times by him tucking his hair in this act.

also albus being a geek and being excited about mathilda bagshot. he’s not beating the secret dork allegations 

in godric’s hollow, when scorpius was telling albus about his plan, albus was actually so serious in the beginning, until scorpius said “scream to the baby”, albus muttered “baby??” to himself and frowned lol

ben’s draco is so soft and smiley, v different from steve’s version! he smiled at ron after ron said “you’ve got nice hair”💀

also ben’s draco smiled when he noticed the farmers market. I can just picture draco cooking for scorpius and astoria aaaahh👨🏼‍🌾

the scene where albus was asleep on the church bench made me cry. ginny understands albus so deeply. she’s just the best. I love ginny. 

i swear albus and scorpius’s hands were touching when they sat on the church bench 

scorpius looked in awe and gave double thumbs up to hermione after they answered albus’s history question at the same time. hermione looked so proud of scorpius, it’s honestly so cute. 

rose asked “you good albus”, albus looked at scorpius, then looked at rose, smiled and nodded, and looked at scorpius again. JUST TELL HIM YOU LOVE HIM ALREADY GOD

and the last scene was perfect.💕

(also this is today’s cast board, everyone was so incredible!)(and it was benjamin stratton as draco, the board wasn’t updated when I took the photo)

[whoopsyeahokay]

October Sun

summary: you and Wally had finally had a chance to talk, reviewed the information at your disposal, which, by then, had included the text you'd received from Xavier. Even with everything you'd been taught, had researched, had a profound knowledge of, things still hadn't made sense. Had Mr. Anderson really been the Big Bad of your Nancy Drew story? Or had something darker been afoot?

pairing: Wally Clark x fem!reader

warnings: eventual smutty smut smut. and mad spoilers. and obvious Canon divergence. very involved, very dense plot.

bon reading, frens

___________________________💀

OCTOBER SUN pt.13

"—and then this morning, Zav texted—"

"Who?"

"Xavier? Maddie's boyfriend?"

Recognition dawned, "Oh, yeah. I know him," spoken with a sour inflection.

"Yeah, him. He's like my brother from another mother." One who'd flounced out of Xavier's life in 8th Grade and had taken half the family assets with her to Milwaukee.

"Anyway," You resumed your summary of events, "He sent me this." Leaning forward, you showed Wally the picture of Maddie's ticket on your phone. "They found it in the woods not too far from here."

After yesterday's series of unfortunate interruptions, you and Wally had ensconced yourselves halfway up the rows of spectator seats in the stadium. Apart from a groundskeeper on the field and a maintenance worker floating about the upmost level of the grandstand, you were blissfully alone.

You sat sideways, Wally's varsity jacket balled up and shoved behind your back so the armrest wouldn't dig into your spine (his idea). Your knees were bent over the armrest that divided your seat and Wally's, socked feet on his lap, lounging as comfortably as was possible in your position.

Wally, meanwhile, held your ankle, thumb occasionally stroking under the hem of your jeans, and had his legs splayed wide to accommodate their length in such a tight space. Arm stretched across the backs of your seats, fingers of his other hand absentmindedly lifting and placing strands of your hair at the back of your head.

It was nice. Casual.

You and Wally were totally and utterly attuned as if sharing space was a regular occurrence. As if he'd always been part of your story, alongside Xavier and Hana and Lucas, trading easy touches and unfiltered thoughts the way people did when they'd known each other since baby teeth.

It was the connection, of course. A tequila glow under the skin that removed the awkwardness of getting to know someone new and replaced it with the opinion that everyone was ohana.

Once again, you'd spent the night with your nose in the gutter of every book you'd thought could be relevant, and not one had had the insinuation of an answer. If you'd been allowed to ask Nanna, you knew she'd say something ridiculous about soulmates, or twin flames or some other buzzword for 'meant to be'.

She was a diehard romantic like that, despite having suffered the loss of Grandpa Jack mere days after your uncle Andrew was born. She'd never remarried. Never dated. Was content to wait until her body expired and she reunited with Grandpa Jack in the afterlife.

It wasn't fair that Nanna couldn't Travel. That she couldn't see ghosts like you and your mother and Ginny. That the family rule prevented you from speaking to Grandpa Jack so you could relay his messages to Nanna.

In the absence of the swarms and storms and squalls you'd been threatened with if you ever spoke to the dead, you were beginning to hate that rule.

Wally pinched the top knot of your spine, lips swept into a roguish grin. "Lost you for a second there, pretty girl."

Deep brown eyes roamed your face for signs of where your mind had drifted. Having Wally's full attention made your heart beat a little faster, your stomach squirm, your breath catch. It brought with it a sense of empowerment; Wally, former star athlete and school hero, looking at you like you'd hung the moon.

"Uhm~." Eloquent.

Wally chuckled, breezy, and tucked a strand of your hair behind your ear. "I feel it, too." He admitted, catching his lip between straight, white teeth and glancing away with a blush. "It's not as crazy as it was yesterday, though."

"True." You said, "But it's still pretty intense. It's like taking one shot. You aren't quite tipsy, you're just vibing and it's—"

"Nice." Wally cut in, sloping a few inches forward.

Heat rose in your cheeks and you knew your eyes had gone honey-soft and dreamy under Wally's gaze. "Yeah. It is."

You gave yourself a moment to take in the feeling—sit with it, and accept it—before you decided it was time to get back to business.

"Alright," Wally crooked his arm at the elbow and propped his head on his fist, "Things we know so far: Mr. Anderson paid Maddie off."

"Check."

"But he's paranoid, so he decides to tie up loose ends and remove Maddie from the equation."

"Check."

"He lures her to the boiler room, attacks her, manages to hurt her enough to get blood on the walls, and then..." Wally's voice and expression turned dubious, "Maddie runs?"

You quickly picked up where Wally left off, "She heads through the woods where she drops her ticket, and then she makes it to the service road."

"Where Mr. A finds her—"

"Drugs her into a coma." You and Wally said together before he continued alone.

"—and then he brings her back here?"

You tried not to sound too hopeful when you asked, "How do you know he brought her back here? Did Maddie tell you?"

Wally had mentioned that Maddie couldn't remember anything about what had happened to her last Friday, but if she'd started to get her memory back, maybe this whole thing would be wrapped up before the weekend. Simon would have his best friend back, Xavier wouldn't be looked at like the school pariah anymore, and you and Wally could...

Focus on each other? Mathilda's face smirked at you in your mind.

Or something, You snapped back as you pictured yourself using a chalkboard eraser to erase Mathilda's image from the inside of your skull.

"Nah, babe," Wally said, "She still can't remember anything. At least, not that she's told me. But it doesn't matter because she's haunting the school, right?"

You peered at Wally who looked so eager to be helpful, and tried to fit the puzzle pieces together. Unfortunately, the pieces you had were turning into blobs of color without a picture for reference.

"Well, I mean, it could mean something," You supposed, willing to approach the theory from a new angle. "But she also could've followed him back here without realizing she wasn't in her body."

Wally's hand slipped up from your ankle to your calf where he began to massage the muscle, almost sympathetically. Like he was about to say something offensive and wanted you to be calm when you received it.

With mild suspicion, you listened to what he had to say, though by the end, you couldn't conceal your shock.

"I don't know what you read about ghosts, baby, but we can't move around like that. We haunt where we die. If Maddie's ghost is in the school, it's because that's where she left her body."

Internally, the blue screen of death crashed down as a bullhorn shrieked fatal system error.

Wrong Wrong Wrong.

Grandpa Jack had died in New York and you'd seen him plenty of times in Wisconsin. Hell, you'd seen American ghosts in the UK when you'd visited your dad. American ghosts who'd died on American soil. The books in your family's library verified that ghosts were at liberty to go wherever they pleased, having earned the right after they were relieved from the 'burden of living' (as one rather staunchly Catholic author had written).

And then you remembered, "You mean more trapped than the rest of us?" Wally had said yesterday.

Jack-knifing into an upright position, you gasped, "You're stuck here?!"

Slowly, as if scared to animate you further, Wally said, "Yeah. Whenever we step off school property, we end up back where we died." He glanced at the field warily. "It sucks."

"Wally," You breathed in and out deeply, heart hammering for a reason that had nothing to do with Wally's closeness, "That's not normal."

💀___________________________

PART TWELVE - PART FOURTEEN

also available on AO3!

MASTERLIST

[xx-dinah-writing-xx]

Hiya! Love your work!! Would you mind doing a one shot of Matt with a sick S/O? I’ve been fighting bronchitis for the past couple days and it’s absolutely kicking my butt 🤧

Sick

Matt Smith x reader

fluff

A/N: there is a similar fanfic that I already have written called Fever, so you can read that one as well

Warning: my interpretation of a Scottish accent. I am terribly sorry, I did my absolute best.😭💀

The first sign of trouble was your voice, scratchy and weak, when Matt called to check in on you that morning.

“Love, you sound awful. Are you okay?” he asked, concern dripping from every word.

You sniffled on the other end of the line. “It’s just a cold, I think. I’ll be fine.”

But when Matt showed up at your apartment an hour later, it was obvious that fine was a massive overstatement. You were buried under a pile of blankets on the couch, looking pale and disheveled, your hair sticking out in random directions. Your nose was red and raw, and your voice—when you croaked out a greeting—was nearly unrecognizable.

“Why are you here?” you rasped, coughing into a tissue.

Matt set down the bag of supplies he’d brought—soup, medicine, tea, tissues, the works—and knelt in front of you, brushing a strand of damp hair off your forehead. “Because you’re sick, and I’m not leaving you like this.”

You blinked at him, touched but also self-conscious. “I look like death warmed over.”

“And yet, still beautiful,” he teased, his lips twitching into a smirk.

You groaned, burying your face in the blanket. “Go away. I’ll survive.”

“Not a chance.” He stood, grabbing a thermometer from the bag and holding it out to you. “Open up.”

You glared at him weakly but obeyed, and when the thermometer beeped, Matt’s brow furrowed. “You’re burning up. Have you eaten?”

“No,” you admitted.

“Right. Soup, then,” he declared, heading to the kitchen.

Over the next few hours, Matt hovered like a mother hen, bringing you tea, making sure you took your medicine, and even tucking you back into your blankets every time you tried to escape.

When you finally felt a tiny bit better—enough to sit up without feeling like the world was spinning—you looked at him, squinting through bleary eyes. “Ye dinnae have tae do all this,” you mumbled, Scottish accent thick and slurred with sickness.

Matt froze, staring at you with wide eyes before bursting into laughter. “Oh my god, what was that?”

You frowned, your cheeks heating. “What was what?”

“That accent! Are you Scottish now?” He was doubled over, laughing so hard he had to hold onto the counter to steady himself.

“It happens when I’m sick,” you muttered, mortified. “It’s a thing. Leave me alone.”

“No, no, this is amazing.” He came back to your side, still grinning. “Say something else.”

You rolled your eyes, but your exhaustion betrayed you. “Fuck ye.”

Matt collapsed onto the couch beside you, clutching his stomach as he laughed. “This is the best thing I’ve ever heard. Why didn’t you tell me this happens?”

“Cause ye neva asked!” you huffed, though the corners of your mouth twitched.

He leaned over, kissing your forehead softly. “It’s adorable. Now, rest. I’ll be here to translate if you suddenly start reciting Robbie Burns.”

A few days later, when you were finally starting to feel human again, you noticed Matt sniffling.

“Uh oh,” you said, watching as he sneezed for the third time in a row.

“I’m fine,” he insisted, though his red nose and glassy eyes told a different story.

By the next morning, he was a wreck, sprawled on the couch under the same pile of blankets you’d used, groaning dramatically every time he moved.

“This is your fault,” he grumbled, his voice muffled by the pillow.

You smirked, sitting beside him and running your fingers through his hair. “I told you not to kiss me while I was sick.”

He opened one eye to glare at you. “You said it in that ridiculous accent. How was I supposed to take it seriously?”

You laughed, leaning down to kiss his temple. “Alright, big baby. Your turn to be looked after.”

And though he’d complain for days about how you “nearly killed him,” he secretly loved every second of being fussed over by you.

[phoebe1013]

Here are detailed headcanons for what it would be like for you as a human to date the Saxon Master from Doctor Who, with a ton of well-placed emojis to capture his chaotic yet alluring energy:

1. He’s obsessed with you being human 🧠🫀🌍

The Master is endlessly fascinated (and frustrated) by how “fragile” and “simple” humans are. He teases you constantly, like, “You’re so… adorably breakable.” But despite his taunts, there’s a certain awe in the way he looks at you—like he can’t quite believe how you manage to survive in a universe as wild as this.

“You humans are so absurd. It’s… kind of beautiful. In an irritating way.” 🙄✨

2. Constant chaos wherever you go 💥💣🚪

You’d try to have a normal life with him, but it’s utterly impossible. A date to the movies? Ends with him rigging the popcorn machine to explode 🍿💥. A quiet night in? Nope—he’s busy building a doomsday device in your living room, calling it “a hobby, darling.” Expect chaos and destruction as the norm.

3. He loves showing off 🛠️🚀👑

The Master thrives on making you look at him like he’s the most impressive being in the universe (and to him, he is). He’ll whisk you away on stolen TARDIS rides, show you alien planets, and casually flex his power with a smug grin:

“See, my dear? This is what dating a Time Lord gets you. You’re welcome.” 😏✨

4. The ultimate protector—but with zero chill 🔥🛡️💀

If anyone dares threaten or upset you, the Master loses it. He won’t just handle the situation—he’ll obliterate it. Whether it’s a rude coworker, an alien invasion, or someone who gave you the wrong coffee order, he’s ready to burn worlds for you.

“You’re mine, and anyone who thinks they can hurt you will suffer. Greatly. Possibly in flames.” ☠️🔥

5. He’s dangerously charismatic 💋🌀🔥

The Master knows how to charm anyone, and with you, it’s no different. Whether he’s flashing his devastating smile 😏 or whispering sweet (and slightly sinister) nothings in your ear, you can’t help but fall for him—even when you know he’s being manipulative.

“Darling, you look stunning tonight. But don’t get used to compliments; I don’t want you getting too smug.” 💃🖤

6. He teases you relentlessly 😈💬😂

Being human gives him endless material to mock you with, but it’s all in a strange, affectionate way. He finds your habits—like drinking water constantly or needing sleep—both ridiculous and endearing.

“You’re thirsty again? How do humans even function? Honestly, it’s pathetic. Cute, though.” 😒🧃💧

7. Jealousy, but make it scary 👀💀🖤

The Master gets intensely jealous. He doesn’t just pout if someone flirts with you; he plots their utter demise while making a point to kiss you possessively in front of them. “You’re mine. Always. Forever. Got it?” 😈🔥💋

8. Dramatic love declarations 🌌🖤✨

The Master has a flair for the dramatic, and his love for you is no exception. When he’s not busy teasing or terrorizing the universe, he’ll give you the most poetic, over-the-top declarations of affection:

“I’ve conquered worlds, rewritten time itself, and yet, somehow… you’re the only thing that matters.” 🥀💫

9. He’s oddly attentive 🧠❤️✨

Despite all his arrogance and chaos, the Master notices everything about you. He knows your habits, favorite foods, how you like your tea (if you drink it, which he’ll mock anyway), and even the way your nose crinkles when you’re annoyed. He won’t admit it outright, but he absolutely dotes on you in his own twisted way.

“Oh, you thought I forgot your favorite snack? Please. I’m a genius, darling.” 🍫👀

10. Arguments are explosive 🌩️😡🔥

You don’t just argue with the Master—you engage in full-blown dramatic clashes, complete with wild gestures, snarky insults, and storming out of rooms. But it never lasts long; he’ll sulk for a while before showing up with a sheepish grin and some grand gesture to win you back.

11. The little moments mean the most 💕🌙🛏️

For all his chaos, the Master has moments of surprising vulnerability. He’ll hold you close during a quiet night, his usual manic energy replaced by something softer. He might not say it directly, but you can tell he cherishes you deeply.

“Don’t get used to this, but… I like having you around. Now go to sleep, human.” 🥹🖤

12. Your humanity keeps him grounded 🫀🌍✨

As someone who thrives on destruction, the Master struggles with his own darker tendencies. But with you, he finds a strange sense of peace—your humanity reminding him of what he’s fighting for (even if he’d never admit it outright).

“You make me want to destroy less… for now. Don’t let it go to your head.” 🌀🌌

Dating the Saxon Master is an adventure of extremes: chaotic, passionate, dangerous, and strangely tender. You might question your sanity at times, but with him, you’ll never doubt that you’re loved—in his own wild, Time Lord way. 🖤🔥✨

[l3viat8an]

Omg Ro Hiiiiii! *pulls Idea out of my pocket and hands it to you along with a little frog charm*

Beel, standing over the trash can, coughing up a lung and a half, trying to get something out of his throat. You stand next to him, patting his back with your eyes wide with concern. Finally he manages to cough the item up and a condom flies out of his mouth and into the trash. Beel takes a few deep breaths, coughing a few more times.

You look on in horror, your eyes as big as dinner plates. "BEEL WHAT THE HELL! WHY DID YOU JUST COUGH UP A CONDOM!?"

"Oh, is that what that weird candy was?" He says, taking the wrapper out of his pocket.

You snatch the wrapper from him and look at it, he had mistaken a rasberry flavored condom for a piece of candy!? "Beel, where did you get this?"

He's moved on to eating a chocolate bar that was in his pocket, and he looks at you mid-chew "Asmo. He had a bunch of those candies on his table, I didn't think he'd mind if I took a box."

*You pinch the bridge of your nose with your fingers and sigh (a habit you developed from being around Luci 💀) "Beel... These aren't candies..."

~🍒

Hiii 🍒! *hands you a little fish charm as thanks!*

This is so random and adds nothing but it reminds me how a couple years ago people were using ‘pumpkin spice’ condoms ‘n taking about how it felt like they ‘burned’ 😭

‘n while I hope Beel wouldn’t eat a condom-

But after hearing about him eating a whole ass pillar from the demon lord‘s castle this is very canon 💀 

Then later MC has to go to Asmo and tell him to put a lock on his condom drawer or stop keeping the flavored ones where Beel can find them-

Then Asmo just starts laughing, because it’s sounds a little ridiculous ‘n MC just reminds Asmo “This is Beel, we’re talking about.” and Asmo listens.

[thegeminisage]

STAR TREK UPDATE TIME! once again, i am behind. four-episode update 💀monday we watched ds9's "visionary" and voy's "emanations," and last night we caught voy's "prime factors" and "state of flux" which was a banger of a fucking evening tbqh.

visionary (ds9):

HEADLINE: ONCE AGAIN, O'BRIEN SUFFERS! he's become so dear to me that i get really distressed when this happens, but also a little excited, because his reputation for suffering is like the only thing i knew about him even when he was just an extra in the tng pilot, and i like knowing what's up

actually, he did a lot of swooning this episode, which was really fun. very damsel of him.

side bar kira gets so quiet when they're dealing with people she doesn't like. it's almost like sisko told her "fi you can't say something nice don't say anything at all" and so she shuts it to avoid undermining him (whom she likes and respects) in front of people like romulans or cardassians, whomst noses she would be happy to break.

i DO like that she got to get mad later, though. ESPECIALLY mad when they insinuated that odo had feelings for her. odo agreeing that this was absolutely ridiculous totally made my night. liar liar <3

back to the a-plot, obrien and julian having moved onto darts after wringing every last bit of joy out of racketball that they possibly could...this is so funny. julian is literally going through his wifeless year right there with him. he is such a good bro

which made it so distressing when obrien saw him in the future and was like BRO HOW COULD YOU LET ME DIE

julian's response of "i did everything i could to keep you alive for an hour" was very casual but i can just imagine him sweating bullets, deeply distressed. i'm sure it was a very long hour for him. i wish they had played it with a little more gravitas!

obrien seeing his own dead body TWICE was creepy. what's more horrific, OUR obrien basically kind of died. like, future obrien is a slightly different version of him. the obrien we've known since tng is dead and he never got to say goodbye to his family. like green shirt and black shirt john. i think i spent fifteen minutes of the next episode (which was about death, hilariously) going "OBRIEN JUST DIED? HE JUST DIED??" he even said he felt like it wasn't his life...........

monday was literally existential dread night. we brought up the mood after this with...

emanations (voy):

this episode was a pretty thoughtful look at te nature of death and what happens if you fuck up a culture whose belief in the afterlife is unshakable by shaking it up. that said, absolutely none of this is up my alley. GOOD for harry kim though. or um bad for him depending where you fall on that

i liked chakotay's story at the beginning about accidentally desecrating someone's grave. i was afraid they were having him be ultracautious about the dead bodies because they were being racist like oh he's aware because native americans are so Spiritual but he literally just picked up a rock once and felt bad about it. could happen to anyone. bullet tentatively dodged.

i have been referring to harry kim as chekov with brain cells but i think in this episode he lost the brain cell for a little while. he very much violated the prime directive with every word. dude, don't tell them you came from the asteroid with the dead bodies!

that said, i am no less fond of him - it was very compassionate to offer that guy a way out and VERY brave to get back into the death pod wearing the death shroud

it is crazy also that this place was in a whole other fucking dimension. this could easily have been a planet.

janeway & co waking that alien lady up and her finding out the afterlife is not real and that she still has to die anyway was really horrible and fucked up. like, they didn't even need to do that to get harry back. he got it on his own. they just tortured her for nothing <3

janeway at the end like i wanna give you time to reflect on what happened harry kim :) and harry kim is like yeah i should do that :) and theyre like yeah the afterlife might be real after all bc of the energy around this planet :) not my ass. there's not even a therapist on board. i would be back to work as QUICK as possible. who wants to reflect on getting into the death pod!!!

prime factors (voy):

HOLY SHIT.

here is the thing. if you let it, this episode will FUCKING take you places

wait wait let me go back and remark on some little details before i get into it. firstly, tom paris needs to stop trying to get harry laid. he'll cheat on his gf if and when hes ready and considering the extenuating circumstances we can't get mad at him bc for all he knows his gf thinks hes dead and has begin moving on too

also, smart of them to bring seska in for this episode when next episode she. you know. bc she's had such small parts so far that otherwise i'd be wondering who tf this even is. and she is HERE to cause problems on purpose! she's such a bad fucking influence i was absolutely aghast. more on this in the next episode but it's a wonderful way to show the maquis guys, who, lest we forget, FUCKING HATE STARFLEET, didn't all automatically hop on the starfleet bandwagon just because they're all stuck out here together.

i think janeway could have pulled a captain kirk in this episode ie fucked and sucked her way to victory. i mean, i'm glad she didn't have to bc that guy was SO skeezy, but she COULD have and it wouldn't have felt the way deanna's victimization in tng felt, it would have felt like kirk's close encounters in tos.

harry kim discovering the transport technology by accident when he's about to finally cheat onm his gf with some hot alien lady...poor harry. he has the worst luck recently.

and of course now we get to the big thing. the tech. the Big ethical dilemma. i LOVE that they quoted the prime directive here - like yes, of course it sucks for the aliens! it's also true what harry said that it still does more good than harm, but there has to be nuance involved...i still think it's stupid to let an entire culture die rather than save them, etc

you know, and i was sitting there like. falling out with this episode, is the thing. i was sitting there going jesus christ why is everyone being so STUPID why are they disobeying orders why aren't they thinking straight. especially after the huge plot twist of tuvok being the one willing to take one for the team, so to speak, and do the illegal dealings so he could save janeway's morality (WHICH: HELLO??? WHY DO THAT IF NOT FOR THAT FORBIDDEN EMOTION: FRIENDSHIP). like just wait to test the damn thing! tuvok is on his way to janeway RIGHT NOW!

but they're desperate. they're desperate and scared shitless and of COURSE it is making them stupid. they almost KILLED EVERYONE because they weren't being smart because THEY WANTED TO GO HOME. like, the scene in janeway's office at the end totally saved all of this for me. you can see on b'elanna's face so clearly she is facing her sins in the cold light of day and having the SAME THOUGHT PROCSS which is "how could i have possibly been so FUCKING stupid"

oh my god. i rewatched it twice. JANEWAY. did we know kate mulgrew could ACT? she was so emotional but still holding it together because SHE IS THE CAPTAIN. her whispered "dismissed" at b'elanna after she GAVE B'ELANNA A CHANCE. i would have sunk right through the floor. and her speech to tuvok!!! "you can use logic to justify anything that is its power and its flaw" LIKE HOLY SHIT GIRL. SAY IT, OUT LOUD!

sorry ik hes married but i also know hes gotta do pon farr eventually he and janeway could get it. like they could literally get it just as buds like one time. "we have forged this relationship over years and i depend on it" SHE LITERALLY DOES DEPEND ON IT! like, that was easily, EASILY the finest acting we have seen in this series so far. that scene CRACKLED. it was incredible. it took an episode i was losing faith in and flipped it around to one of my favorites. 10/10

state of flux (voy):

this one wasn't as good as the previous one but it was still pretty fucking good.

the mystery was really entertaining in this one and kept me guessing until the end. i kept going "no it's too EASY if it's seska" and then seska would trick me and everyone else into thinking she had plausible reasons for x suspicious fact and i would go SEE she's just complex! but she got me. and in hindsight it's SO obvious, and especially compared to lt carey who was a dick at first but fell in line and is working on his redemption arc or whatever. it wouldn't make sense narratively to send him back

chakotay refusing to take even ONE MORE BITE of that soup he wanted so bad after he realized seska essentially stole it. punishing himself ALONG WITH everyone else for the infraction. seska is such a good way to illustrate the tensions between starfleet and the maquis, even out here, and chakotay is in SUCH a rough position, having to both protect his own people AND keep them in line AND protect them BY keeping them in line. he and janeway both want the crew to be completely integrated but it's just not that easyyyy i love the complexity of it all

i feel like i recognized the filming locations in this one...yeah, all caves look alike but it looks so much like that valley outside the holo-city from ds9 and the save reminded me of that tng ep where picard and crusher got mind-linked

janeway was a sucker to let those kazon get that close. like of COURSE they kill the guy after the entire ship bled to save his life. but she's a well-meaning sucker. classic starfleet move

i also love chakotay's little crisis at the end. like, bro, am i that easy to trick? he is trying so hard and everything continues to fall apart around him!!! he hates cardassians and he was fucking one! dude is living in a nightmare scenario.

i hope we see seska again - they wrote her out when she just now got interesting. problems on purpose.

crack headcanon for a second there was maybe she was that woman they thought kira was in that one cardassian kira episode. that would have been way more interesting than her being cardassian on purpose, actually

TONIGHT: ds9's "distant voices" and "through the looking glass."

[riverstardis]

new year, new me, new you:

FINALLY HERE

seb just wants elle to take over as his mentor but she says she can’t unless he makes his complaint official :/

ouch ethan is soo badly sunburnt😭😭 and cal doesn’t look burnt but doesn’t look that tanned either??

cal’s telling alicia about some “bahama babes” that were following them around and apparently he had to give them his number just so they would leave him alone. and when she’s gone ethan goes “bahama babes? you spent most of the holiday reading dan brown novels and actually pining after alicia” and cal says he’s hardly gonna tell her that though is he💀💀💀 cal does really like alicia but he wants her to think he’s not that bothered about their relationship. maybe because he thinks she’s not looking for anything serious and he doesn’t want to get hurt? or maybe it’s just because he doesn’t want to tarnish his bad boy reputation so he’s playing hard to get. tbh though after what happened with taylor it’s pretty understandable that he’s having issues with a proper relationship. doesn’t really excuse him treating alicia like this though does it.

elle asks cal and ethan if they’ve made their new year’s resolutions yet and cal’s like “no need. nothing to change” fucking hell🙄 she tells them that if they want to apply for the south african research project they need to submit proposals by the end of the day

cal says ethan should go for it because the flat’s getting a bit crowded and ethan’s like “it’s my flat!” RIGHT????? cal’s so annoying😭

aw alicia tells ethan that her mum spent the holiday trying to set her up with eligible bachelors “the curse of having an invisible boyfriend” ffs cal do better man

eww alicia peels some burnt skin off ethan’s nose. he goes “it’s no skin off my nose” HAHDHJFFJFKFK

after speaking to alicia ethan decides to write a proposal. so basically he’s just doing it to get away :( the thing is he clearly knows that she likes him back but he also knows that she doesn’t seem to be planning on breaking up with cal anytime soon

dylan bestie i’m not sure telling seb to try not to kill anyone right in front of the patient you’re leaving him to treat on his own in resus is such a good idea

cal’s kiss club game sjskfkkg

seb told louise about dylan supposedly trying to kiss him and how elle doesn’t believe him and now ofc she’s telling everyone else

“but he was married to that fit soldier bird, sam whats-her-face?” oh this must be less than a year until sam comes back now right?

seb’s listening in to them talking about it and smirking🤬 and noel remembers the photo that had seb and dylan hugging in the background😬

max tries to warn dylan about seb but he dismissed him before he can actually say why he should be worried😬

cal finds out about alicia’s mum trying to set her up and he wants to borrow ethan’s tablet so he can “hit back” by posting some “buff holiday snaps”… seriously cal? ethan helpfully voices my exact sentiments “this is ridiculous. have you even asked her how she felt about it?” “about what?” “about the fact that you jetted off to the bahamas and left her to spend christmas with her parents!”

cal’s like “why? has she said something?” and ethan’s just exasperated and says it doesn’t matter

wow seb’s really laying it on thick now isn’t he

poor grace :(

now cal’s just sitting reading ethan’s research proposal on his tablet??? i suppose the mistake he made last time was not actually reading what ethan had written before he stole it

elle sees him and asks if he’s applying and he looks at alicia to gauge her reaction and then says yes and says to alicia “sorry do you mind me jetting off again?” even though she very clearly DOES mind, especially as it would be for 3 months and she probably thinks he’d been planning to apply but just hadn’t told her. he’s literally doing that hot and cold manipulation technique🚩

elle pushes him to submit it there so she knows he’s done it before the deadline so he submits ethan’s proposal🤬🤬🤬🤬

ethan talking to his patient “you can’t choose who she falls in love with … i know how hard it is but sometimes you have to face facts, accept that it’s not going to happen, and decide what’s more important. otherwise you might lose her forever.” lovely patient parallel

speaking of patient parallels, seb’s one with his patient is even less subtle lmao

connie demanding all grace’s medical notes so she can find out what happened😬

elle reminds ethan about the application but he’s changed his mind and elle says it would be tough to beat cal’s anyway and says the title which ethan obviously recognises as his own

i think seb was going to come clean to elle after encouraging his patient to come clean but he’s too late bc louise already sent her the photo

dylan’s “Im NoT eVeN gAy” sjskkkfkg

max believes dylan

ethan goes to alicia’s looking for cal but she says he’s gone to london for the night and ethan’s SO angry :(

“has something happened?” “i don’t even know why i’m surprised, it’s not even the first time he’s done it!” “done what?” “stolen my proposal!” “‘airway management after major trauma’ that’s yours?”

he says cal also stole £15000 from him once and he also shows her a big smiley face on his stomach where cal put sun cream but left him sleeping on a hammock. OH so it’s cal’s fault that he’s so sunburnt??? that doesn’t surprise me😭

“you know when you care about someone you want them to be happy, right? when they clearly don’t care about you then eventually you think why am i bothering?! he never does anything for my sake, ever! so why am i holding myself back with you? i’m watching him hurt you and i would never, could never do that!”

“alicia, what i said at christmas, i meant it. i love you. and i think you care about me as well.” “it’s too late though, i’m with cal” “i know, believe me i know. but i don’t care. life’s too short. i think i’ve worked out what my new year’s resolution’s going to be. for once i’m putting myself first.”

YEAAAAAA THEYRE FINALLYYY KISSING🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰

aww robyn saying “do you think dylan’s going to be okay? he hasn’t reacted well to these things in the past”

seb ringing his dad… so he’s literally doing exactly what he told his patient to come clean about

dylan throwing and kicking over furniture :((( and dervla running away :((((((

[isabelinlove]

Baby, It’s Cold Outside

Did something possess me to write an entire Romebel drabble based on this silly tweet? Yes, yes it did.

Pre-relationship, maybe early s3-ish. Just fluff and silliness. I promise one day I’ll post writing for a different f/o, but today is not that day 💀💀

It’s a gray November afternoon, and Isabel and Roman are walking back from lunch. The sun was out when they left — hence the decision to walk — but now the temperature has dropped and the wind is whipping. Shivering, Isabel curses herself for not bringing a jacket.

“You cold?” Roman asks, as if he read her mind.

“Wow, how’d you guess?” she replies. She expects him to flip her off and keep walking, but instead he stops and removes his coat.

“Here, you frigid bitch,” he says, holding it out to her.

“Seriously?” she asks, raising an eyebrow.

“Yes. Fucking take it,” he says, insistently shaking it at her. She stares at him for a moment longer before letting him drape the coat over her shoulders. It’s made of a thick dark gray wool, and probably cost more than her monthly rent. She can feel his lingering body heat and smell his cologne on it.

“Fuck, it really is cold out here,” Roman says, shivering and rubbing his arms. “Jesus.” Isabel shakes her head and rolls her eyes.

“You want it back?”

“Nope, I’m good,” he replies, voice strained. They continue to walk. His shivering becomes more violent.

“You sure you don’t want it back?”

“Yes, I’m sure.” Only a few blocks left. He sniffles pathetically and muffles a sneeze into the sleeve of his suit.

“Oh my god, take it back,” Isabel says, starting to wriggle out of the coat.

“No, keep it. I’m being fucking chivalrous,” Roman says, snuffling and wiping his nose with the back of his hand.

“Well, at least share it with me, then. Before you die out here.” She offers him the left sleeve of the coat.

“Fine,” he grumbles. He slides his arm into it, wrapping his other arm around her waist so they’ll both fit.

“This looks fucking ridiculous. I hope you know that,” he says, though his smirk betrays him.

“Well, better this than you catching pneumonia and blaming me for it,” she retorts.

“Nah, I think you just wanted an excuse to be this close to me.”

“You wish.”

They walk like that the rest of the way back to the office.

Tagging @tomfoolies <3

[pasukiyo]

Could you please write a Steve Harrington smut!!! where it’s season 3 and him and reader have been drugged by the Russians. When Dustin makes them watch back to the future they sneak off to the bathroom because they’re both needy and have really desperate passionate sweet sex?

𝐧𝐞𝐞𝐝𝐲.

— steve harrington x f!reader

warnings; steve and reader are fuucckkkkeddd upppp, bad writing lol, sex, bad jokes, potty humor lmao

a/n; not very proud of my writing here but i loved this idea pls 😭 still trying to get back into the groove of writing so hopefully my writing will get better again 💀 gonna try and write longer fics too once i get my shit back together

word count; 1.5k

“hey, i think—“ steve stopped to hiccup, the back of his hand rubbing over his lips as he giggled behind it. “—i think, i have a great idea.” she giggled back and leaned into his arm, her own slithering around it, never minding the armrest of the movie theater seat digging into her side. “yeah, stevie?” she purred, nuzzling her nose into the crook of her neck. if either of them had been sober, they’d be able to notice the looks of disgust the movie goers behind them gave, but they were both far too gone to notice nor care. 

 steve glanced over to the big screen before them, his teeth sinking into the plush flesh of his bottom lip in a failed attempt to stifle yet another giggle. “what if..” he stopped again, as if to add suspense. “..we go to the bathroom.. and play a game.” she felt her stomach do a flop as she hiccuped, unable to sift through the haziness of her mind— nor did she want to. 

 “yeah? what kind.. of game?”

 steve flashed a cheeky grin, “one where.. you play the mommy.. and i’ll be marty mcfly.” she pouted, “noooo, i wanna play marty mcfly,” she whined, smacking his bicep. “why can’t you play the mommy?”

 he scowled, “no,” he whined back, “it doesn’t work like that. you—“ hiccup, “—you have to be the mommy.”

 “wait, why is it mommy and marty mcfly?” she questioned, lips puffy with her pout. steve’s eyes rolled in their sockets, as if it was the most ridiculous thing he’d heard all day. “because in the movie his mom wanted to fuck him,” he gestured to the big screen ahead with his palm. “see?”

 her forehead wrinkled when she furrowed her brows, wiping at her eyes in an attempt to rub the blurriness away. “what?”

 “you haven’t been paying attention, have you?”

 “noooo,” she yawned, her temple falling against the curve of his shoulder, her nails burrowing into the skin at his wrist. “marty mcfly went back in time and like, his mom was coming onto him,” steve explained, ignoring the complaints coming from the irritated movie goers around them. “but—“ she paused to tap her chin. “like, she didn’t know he was her son, right?” she asked, blinking up at the screen. “because like, if she did, she totally wouldn’t have sex with him, right?”

 steve blinked. 

  “woah. i didn’t think about that.”

 “oh my god, steve,” she giggled. “i totally get it now. you want me to play the mommy because marty mcfly’s mom totally wanted to bone him.”

 steve’s knuckles dug into his closed eyelids, his teeth sinking into his bottom lip once again. “should we go to the bathroom now and play?” he questioned in a murmur, and her hand slithered down to his, their fingers locking together. “totally.”

 they staggered as they arose to their feet, much to the people behind their seat’s dismay, and she leaned into steve’s side for support, squeezing his upper arm as he shuffled his way through the aisle, stepping on people’s feet left and right. they giggled at their curses, finally making their way to the exit and slamming the door against the wall as they swayed down the hallway towards the restrooms. 

 “they were so pissed off at us,” she chuckled as steve led her into the men’s bathroom, the concept of the lock going way over either of their heads. she giggled as she backed up until the backs of her thighs hit the sink, and steve’s palms gathered her hips, pressing them against his own as his lips captured hers in a sloppy kiss. she giggled into his mouth as their tongues lazily danced over one another, and she moaned, her palms flat against his chest when she pulled away. 

 “wait but steve, we can’t play mommy and marty mcfly because like, his mom didn’t know he was her son when she—“

 “you know, the more i hear you say it, the more gross it sounds,” he interrupted with a forefinger to her lips. “maybe we should just like, do what we normally do.” her arms slithered around his neck when he pressed his hips back into hers, and she giggled at the bulge in his pants prodding against her clothed sex. “stevie,” she mewled when his lips began their assault on her jaw, tongue sloppy as he licked right underneath her ear. she shivered, her hands slipping down the short sleeves of his scoops ahoy uniform to his elbows, her fingernails etching crescents into his skin. 

 he hummed in question whilst his lips kissed further down her throat, his head nuzzling into the crook of her neck to suck at her collarbone. “stevie,” she whined again, rutting her hips against his, desperate for some sort of friction. “what is it, pretty?” he purred as his warm palms ventured their way beneath her shirt, tugging it up and over her head. she almost didn’t notice, much more concerned with the throbbing between her legs. she squirmed when he tossed her shirt to the ground, his fingers curling over the hem of her shorts to tug them down her legs. “aw, look how wet you’ve gotten for me,” he giggled, nearing tripping over his own two feet when he pushed back between her legs, the tips of his fingers applying pressure just above her clothed clit. 

 “steve,” she cried, grinding her hips into his touch as he rubbed her over her panties. “you’re so pretty,” he cooed, weaving his fingers through her hair with his opposite hand, cradling the side of her head as she panted, and he rubbed harder at her panties, relishing the way her face contorted in pleasure. “steve!” she moaned louder this time, gripping at his wrist between her legs. “need you inside.”

 steve’s lips jutted out into a pout, “so needy.”

 she reached for the fabric of his scoops ahoy outfit, tugging at the blue material, “off,” she insisted, to which he complied, almost falling back onto his ass when he kicked off his shorts. her vision began to stir again and she blinked, desperate to clear the haziness away whilst steve fisted his cock, throwing his head back as he pumped himself. “you’re so,” he hiccuped behind his knuckles, chuckling into his skin, “—sexy.”

 she dug the heels of her palms into her eyes as steve peppered her face with kisses, tugging her panties to the side and guiding the tip of his cock towards her entrance. “my pretty, pretty girl,” he murmured against her temple as he rocked his hips forward, slipping through her entrance, his lips falling agape at the feeling of being squeezed so tight. “you’re so.. tight,” he moaned into her ear as she wrapped her arms back around his neck, balancing herself with his weight. “fuck, you’re squeezing the shit out of me.”

 she giggled, even as he began to set a sloppy pace with his thrusts, whimpering when she clenched around him. “at least we’re in a bathroom,” she snickered, referring to what he had said moments before. he blinked, his mind going fuzzy, his thrusts on autopilot as he tried to remember what he had just said, unable to make sense of anything in his jumbled brain. he whimpered her name as he pounded into her dripping cunt, their moans permeating the very public restroom, uncertain of whether or not they had an audience.

 it wasn’t like either of them cared— the drugs made sure of that.

 “oh, steve!” she cried, “oh, steve! steve!” she chanted his name over and over and over again, becoming a woman possessed. “harder, baby, harder,” she mewled into his neck, seeking out his warmth. “wanna come so hard for you.”

 steve grunted, his cock spearing her aching pussy, practically slamming her into the wall behind her. 

 she was too cock-drunk— and quite literally fucked up— to care.

 “fuck yeah, baby,” he growled near the shell of her ear, his forehead dropping down onto hers as his thrusts became sloppier, signaling the beginning of his end. “gonna fucking fill you up, yeah? gonna make you come all over my cock,” he groaned as she tightened around him once again, her orgasm making her toes curl and her back arch until her chest was flush against his, one of his hands managing to work its way between their bodies to squeeze at her breast. “oh, oh, baby,” he hissed as he snapped his hips one final time before he spilled, painting her walls white with his cum. she cried into the crook of his neck as she came down from her high— at least one of them— whilst he collapsed into her, his knees nearly giving out. 

 “stevie?” she whispered after awhile, all of a sudden feeling dizzy.

 “hm?’

 “do you think that those big, scary russian dudes are looking for us right now?”

 steve paused. 

 she could feel his lips curve up into a crescent against her skin, and she could feel her own lips do the same before they both erupted into a fit of laughter. she clawed at his back to keep herself stable on top of the bathroom sink, blinking away the tears from her eyes.

 “do you think dustin’s mad at us for not staying until the end of back to the future?” she questioned, and steve grumbled into the dewy skin at her neck.

 “who gives a shit about dustin? marty mcfly’s mom wanted to fuck him.”

[sunlightandsuffering]

Lifeguard Hoekasa getting super jealous and pissed when they run in into one of Eren's past hookups as if she didn't get with the whole beach💀💀

"Mikasa.... Mikasa, Mikasa!" Jean smacks her arm and she almost falls over the guard rail from the shock of it.

She whips her head towards him angrily, "What!?"

Her partner for this beautiful Saturday morning winces at her response, swallowing nervously, "Umm, does the kid over there look like he's drowning to you?"

Right, she's supposed to be doing her job, not plotting murder.

She turns to scan the water, eyes zeroing in on a little boy in blue who does seem a little like he's drowning. "Just a little." Jean sighs, "I'm gonna go check it out, but I'm thinking just a flailer. Keep an eye out though." She nods and then her co-lifeguard is jogging down the beach towards the little boy and his mom, the kid is probably fine. Mikasa don't he other hand is not. Because her boyfriend had come to visit her this morning, wanting to surf on her shift because in his words, 'if I drown, my sexy lifeguard can save me.'

She'd retorted that she would instead send Jean and Eren had kissed her nose in response. Now, she'd 100% send Jean, because this asshole, her asshole has been on the beach, talking to this other surfer bitch for the past ten minutes. He's using all of his hot moves to, the ones he doesn't even know he has, the ones that are just somehow ridiculously hot. Leaning back against his board, showcasing the impressive display of washboard abs, and strong biceps as he stretches himself against his pale blue surfboard. And worst of all, the girl is most certainly not immune, her eyes roving over him, leaning in to touch his arm, laughing at everything he says. it fucking pisses her off. She's working and she has to watch this bullshit, her boyfriend flirt with some other surfer, some beautiful one too. A tiny, perky little blonde thing and it only serves to enrage her more.

What the fuck Eren?

She's not even paying attention to where Jean is now playing with a toddler in the waves, too focused on her man and plotting this girl's murder. She'll throw her in the ocean, borrow the lifeguard boat they have to chuck her out in the deep, leave her to the sharks.

The last straw is when the girl starts tracing her hands over his arm, rubbing his shoulder, and Eren tenses his muscles in response while they laugh. Thats it! Mikasa walks towards them with purpose, and her purpose is to rip this entitled little bitch from her man by force if necessary.

She appears in front of them in a huff, barely withholding her rage, ready to fucking go, cheeks tinged red with her anger, and chest heaving as she works herself up, she's never been more furious, and she wonders if this is what Eren feels like every time she interacts with Porco?

To her immense surprise though, instead of being shocked, or horrified that she's interrupted, Eren shrugs the girl off to tug her under his arm. "Baby!" He says excitedly, his hand finding her waist, a little high for her taste, a little to close to her boobs, "I was just talking about you!" He beams as he turns back to the blonde, "This is my girlfriend, Mikasa. She's the lifeguard here, as you can see. And Mimi, baby this is Historia, she's an old friend of mine, actually got me into surfing a few years ago." She deflates like a burst balloon, especially when Eren says his next words, "Her and her girlfriend are out here for the weekend, I said we should hangout, what do you think?"

She holds out her hand numbly and Historia gives her a knowing look, pursing her lips to keep her smile at bay. The blonde knows exactly what she was thinking. "Nice to meet you." "You as well," Historia giggles, "I was just saying how Eren has gotten so ripped lately, must be because he has a pretty girl to look good for, he used to be a beanpole."

Eren laughs behind her, a deep rumble in his chest, and his hand dips lower, tangled around her waist, oh yes she knows. And now she's thoroughly embarrassed that she'd ever doubted him.

Shit, she'd better make it up to him later, she's not very nice, doubting her boy.

Historia winks though as Eren goes on and on about his new exercise regiment, and Mikasa hopes her secret is safe with her.

[baekhvuns]

I knooooow and this person wanna hang out with me as well 😭 this is ridiculous, just let me enjoy the concerts I have... go see Ateez 4 times and leave me alone

Oh no 🥑 must be cold, avos don't like cold 💔

KQ released another statement about disrespectful fans, but it's not enough, they need to start electrocuting them or something. I'm not sure how some fansites work either, I know some get info from the companies (not always legally), so you're gonna wake up early as fuck to take some photos??? Be serious lol it's so weird to me...

Stop this isn't Sweet Home Alabama moment ok 😭 I heard that some people were disappointed with Romantic Killer's ending? The manga isn't terrible, but it was boring to me

I think Tasir being the bad guy wouldn't make sense and be such a cheap plot twist. So fingers crossed he's okay 🤞 The earrings phase started with Howl Pendragon and now we're here...

It's sad to see great teams lose, but also kinda funny ngl 😅 this year is wild, and the fact Italy didn't even qualify like what? Honestly I haven't watched the matches, just saw bits and pieces, but I heard some decisions were controversial. Richarlison is so funny, I can't stan a Spurs player tho, gotta respect myself. Lmao Mbappe, that would be me

SM is either doing something right or terribly. With JYP, Skz are doing ok so clearly their division isn't that bad, but Itzy? Some people argue Twice is losing their momentum as well... Itzy tho, damn they had so many Korean and Japanese releases this year and all of them were pretty mid and kinda similar 💀

Both Jinni amd Yedam trained for a long time, whatever happened with them hopefully they're doing ok

Thankfully my friend didn't meet a lot of racists jahdhshsjagsha she had a boyfriend there, but now she has another one in Straya 👀 so nothing is really there for her in the Maple Land anymore. Zoologist and something else, I always forget because it's so complicated lol.

Baek jshsiausushssvs

Waiting until I see model Hwa on a huge ass billboard 🥰 ohhh what are you gonna do in Paris 👀 ngl I used to like the city now I think it's overrated hahahah, but it's not bad

Yesss I didn't think you were necessarily giving Yeohui vibes before, but the description fits.

Speaking of blonde. Thoughts? Personally I'm sooooo into it. The person who said Seonghwa looks awful in blonde... get help, pls

Okay but imagine this AU, uber driver or just some guy goes back in time and needs to work in a mansion or something...

Cottagecore or dark academia, visually the latter, but he would definitely be pretentious and while it can be cool, I need some soft Hwa in his big ass knitted hat <3

Dark haired aloof this is so specific lol. Bestie all the lyrics question and ofc Taylor 🔪 anyways I got matcha. I don't even like matcha very much...

Seonghwa in his big hat and scarf, very cosy and warm, I'm gonna bite his nose 🤗

Ohhh are we gonna see Ateez at the wedding or... also some of the comments 😬 Atinys have this weird hate boner towards Eden as though he didn't produce so many amazing songs they love, clown behaviour

I know, I know miss tenelka delivering again 👀

Ahhhhh this is cool

A WIN FOR SPY X FAMILY NATION

AIEYUAGSHSGSUSHAHSHS and 🧎🏻‍♀️🧎🏻‍♀️🧎🏻‍♀️🧎🏻‍♀️

Can they stooooop

P.S. had so many messy dreams last night but Seonghwa was featured... - DV 💖

hi hello!!

I knooooow and this person wanna hang out with me as well 😭 this is ridiculous, just let me enjoy the concerts I have... go see Ateez 4 times and leave me alone /// Oh no 🥑 must be cold, avos don't like cold 💔

LMFAOOOO BESTIE UR STUCK 😭😭😭 and now the comeback they said they wanna focus on the kr fans in jan but then the tour starts feb 😭😭 they’re really saying ur not seeing them 😭😭🤚🏼ABSOLUTE BS 😭😭 mister avo is constantly stuck under the snow its rly hilarious bc ppl make a snowman out of it fbf

KQ released another statement about disrespectful fans, but it's not enough, they need to start electrocuting them or something. I'm not sure how some fansites work either, I know some get info from the companies (not always legally), so you're gonna wake up early as fuck to take some photos??? Be serious lol it's so weird to me...

LMFAOOOO RBQMFBKSBDAK ELECTROCUTING 😭😭😭 ur right the stalking hasn’t gone yet and the fact that there’s a whole law on it now and ppl are still not stopping is mad low,, no it really is! the dedication is obsession

Stop this isn't Sweet Home Alabama moment ok 😭 I heard that some people were disappointed with Romantic Killer's ending? The manga isn't terrible, but it was boring to me

LMFAOOOO I CANT HELP IT I HAD TO DOUBLE TAKE FBWKDBW okay yeah! the ending was a bit disappointing in the sense that the show was great and ppl kept expecting more and more that the ending just kinda went flat 🧍🏻‍♀️

I think Tasir being the bad guy wouldn't make sense and be such a cheap plot twist. So fingers crossed he's okay 🤞 The earrings phase started with Howl Pendragon and now we're here...

it def would be, but if they play it well 😩 VILLAIN ARC >> NOT W HOWL FJWKDHWKDJWBDKS HE IS THE EPITOME OF A ✨ MAN ✨

It's sad to see great teams lose, but also kinda funny ngl 😅 this year is wild, and the fact Italy didn't even qualify like what? Honestly I haven't watched the matches, just saw bits and pieces, but I heard some decisions were controversial. Richarlison is so funny, I can't stan a Spurs player tho, gotta respect myself. Lmao Mbappe, that would be me

it really is! 😭 it was quite upsetting to see them walk off and then ppl make those edits with sad music and it just HURTS EVEN MORE FBWMDB nOOO BC HOW DID ITALY NOT QUALIFY?? BIGGEST SHOCKER,, yeah, the decisions were rly controversial to the point the brazilian players called the coach out <//3 it would’ve been amazing to see 2 powerhouses like brazil & argentina play together, mayhaps next time but it wont be the same 😭😭 LMFAOOOO HEY FBQNDJW COME ON A LITTLE BIT OF SELF RESPECT CAN LEAVE FBWKDH mbappe pisses me of sm 😭😭😭 but he’s so funnybfbwkdhwj but i have to say, so far the best game of the wc has been argentina v netherlands, every 5 minutes they were fighting 😭😭 the desperation and the tension on the penalties seriously took time off my life 😭😭

SM is either doing something right or terribly. With JYP, Skz are doing ok so clearly their division isn't that bad, but Itzy? Some people argue Twice is losing their momentum as well... Itzy tho, damn they had so many Korean and Japanese releases this year and all of them were pretty mid and kinda similar 💀

exactly!! sm’s rly doing the hit or miss and unfortunately doesn’t realize that some groups don’t fit the ‘experimental’ genre well esp bc they have a pre established genre itself! same w jyp! itzy has their already established genre and it was peak icy, wannabe but then they started to get a little too 📈📉 with the genre and now it’s just been miss miss miss instead of the hit hit hit 😭😭😭

Both Jinni amd Yedam trained for a long time, whatever happened with them hopefully they're doing ok

yeah! hope they’re all well bc damn it really is saddening seeing all these talented ppl leave, id be so frustrated to have worked so hard only for it to shatter 😭😭

Thankfully my friend didn't meet a lot of racists jahdhshsjagsha she had a boyfriend there, but now she has another one in Straya 👀 so nothing is really there for her in the Maple Land anymore. Zoologist and something else, I always forget because it's so complicated lol.

I HAVE WANTED TO SHOW THIS EVER SINCE WE TALKED ABOUT THIS bc what the fUCK. IS THAT THE PERSON WHOS BF IS YOUNGER AND LIVED A WHOLE AU FBSNDBDB ur friend has such a cool job

Baek jshsiausushssvs

LMFAOOOO RM MINGI MARK 😭😭😭 PLS THIS WOULD BE AMAZING TO WATCH, hear me out we need kwangsoo in this

Waiting until I see model Hwa on a huge ass billboard 🥰 ohhh what are you gonna do in Paris 👀 ngl I used to like the city now I think it's overrated hahahah, but it's not bad

waiting for the ysl ambassadorship bc that would be my last straw,, i have a few weddings to attend actually! in london but since paris is right there MIGHT AS WELL OUI OUI CREME DE LA CREME primarily for the fashion and the twinkle of the eiffel tower will live my yn <3

Yesss I didn't think you were necessarily giving Yeohui vibes before, but the description fits. /// Speaking of blonde. Thoughts? Personally I'm sooooo into it. The person who said Seonghwa looks awful in blonde... get help, pls

<33 tysm 😭😭 AND YES I AGREE ALL BLOND ATEEZ !!!!!!! WE NEED THIS !!!! jongho’s blond undercut >>> mingi is unstoppable with blond hair, san and hwa’s wave blond colour esp >>> hongjoong with blond and not that yellow hair he had,,, wooyoung blond was superior esp w the wonderland uniform concept, boy was majestic ✨🫡 THAT PERSON JUST SEES HWA AS THE YELLOWLY BLOND BUT WHEN THEY SEE THE DIRTY BLOND 😮‍💨😮‍💨 nothing’s much better

Okay but imagine this AU, uber driver or just some guy goes back in time and needs to work in a mansion or something...

this but with the duke and his general’s next universe 🤩

Cottagecore or dark academia, visually the latter, but he would definitely be pretentious and while it can be cool, I need some soft Hwa in his big ass knitted hat <3 //// Dark haired aloof this is so specific lol. Bestie all the lyrics question and ofc Taylor 🔪 anyways I got matcha. I don't even like matcha very much...

pretentious law school rivals dark academia but he knits for fun and the reader finds out he knits <33 domesticness <33 A HAT SO BIG I NEED HIS FACE GONE also what is this 😭😭 what the hell 😭😭,, IT RLT IS BC IT REMINDED ME OF TASIR DBDBD ok matcha is literally g r a s s, i do not understand the hype around it evfkw hello <3 i am oolong tea <3

Seonghwa in his big hat and scarf, very cosy and warm, I'm gonna bite his nose 🤗 /// Ohhh are we gonna see Ateez at the wedding or... also some of the comments 😬 Atinys have this weird hate boner towards Eden as though he didn't produce so many amazing songs they love, clown behaviour

seonghwa is the epitome of christian girl fall but winter, but uh,, is this ur model paris hwa? ,,, i don’t understand why sm ppl hate him, w/o him there would’ve been no ateez and they wouldn’t have gone this far if not for the experience and guidance he has in producing kpop worthy songs! his wife is so pretty eden who? need his wife 🔫

I know, I know miss tenelka delivering again 👀

MISS IS DELIVERING AND I NEED TO CATCH UP FHWKDHSK

Ahhhhh this is cool ////// A WIN FOR SPY X FAMILY NATION

THE PRESENCE THE CHOREO !!!!!!! WHAT A PERFORMANCE im gonna eat him

AIEYUAGSHSGSUSHAHSHS and 🧎🏻‍♀️🧎🏻‍♀️🧎🏻‍♀️🧎🏻‍♀️ /// Can they stooooop

HELLO NO! NO! AGAIN! NO! NO! NO MADAME NON!

…uh

P.S. had so many messy dreams last night but Seonghwa was featured... - DV 💖

point form detailed now. 🔫

..

and 4 years to love shot and still no yunho cover 🔫🔫 haha men are liars!

ANON FBQMDHQKDJWK NOT THIS

hear me out, this au

what was this premier 😭😭 30 mins of rain asmr 😭😭😭🤚🏼 they’re sIRENS ITS COMING TRUE